#every time kakashi tries to sneak in and steal his kids back oro sends him back with pictures of how they're doing | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

evilkitten3 · 1 year ago

Text

naruto crack au where kakashi manages to successfully drill the "never abandon your comrades" thing into team seven's heads

so when sasuke deserts naruto and sakura immediately desert with him. like he gets to the village gates and they're just waiting for him bags packed like "what took u so long we doing this or what"

he tries to get them to go back bc of course he does. "no you losers this is about me i'm going to kill my brother. also i'll have to kill my best friend for the super sharingan and you two are like the only people i talk to". but they do not listen. teamwork sasuke we will defeat your brother (OUR brother #communism) with the power of teamwork. just like kakashi-sensei said

suddenly orochimaru has to deal with three horrible little goblins with an even more codependent relationship than his old team

#naruto #team seven #orochimaru's favorite is sakura bc she's smart and respectful and gives kabuto headaches #kabuto's favorite is naruto bc he thinks he's funny #nobody's favorite is sasuke. he's fine with that tho #also sakura can still summon slugs she made a bet with tsunade ahead of time for the right to make the contract #kakashi keeps trying to get his team back but keeps approaching them one on one #which always ends in whoever he's talking to going ''i can't abandon my teammates sensei wtf''#obito is watching all of this from the bushes and laughing his ass off #the sound five live bc. nobody bothered to tell tsunade team seven had left until it was way too late #orochimaru keeps her updated tho #every time kakashi tries to sneak in and steal his kids back oro sends him back with pictures of how they're doing #''little sakura-chan is making excellent progress with chakra scalpels! you must be so proud! oh wait''#she hopes he dies #oro tells naruto who his parents are to spite jiraiya #unfortunately he does this when they're all still annoying little thirteen-year-old shitheads #so sakura and sasuke are both furious and don't talk to either of them for a day #they don't even know what they're mad about they're just Mad #meanwhile sakura's parents are happy to hear she's doing well and hope she writes soon #they don't. they don't really get the treason thing #team hebi/taka still forms ofc #it's an absolute disaster #sakura's a little sad when they finally ditch orochimaru bc she'd actually really enjoyed learning from him #like yeah he was an absolutely horrible human being but. she learned a lot!#he comes back later ofc #there's sorta an awkward moment when naruto finds out gaara got abducted and demands to go after him #sasuke: ok have fun #sakura: we're going too #sasuke: fuck #orochimaru: tell sasori i said hiiiii~ <3

211 notes · View notes