#every scene is an absolute nightmare i s2g

[hismercytomyjustice]

I will never financially recover from 600 Strike…

I just…

God it’s so fucking good… T^T

Of course the “NEXT TO MY WIFE” part, but Odysseus showing Poseidon what happens when you finally get exactly what you want…

Look what you’ve turned me into

Look what we’ve become

*incoherent screeching*

The lyrics are just SO GOOD. Like, I am awe of how Jay manages to one up himself over and over again. This song is maybe the most pivotal one as far as Odysseus’s character arc is concerned and he fucking CRUSHED IT.

I AM ADDING A CUT BECAUSE I HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS, OKAY?! ( ༎ຶ⌑༎ຶ)

UGH. I will never get enough of this musical, I s2g. Jay does such an amazing job of portraying Odysseus’s emotions and mental state throughout. By the time we get to 600 Strike, it’s fucking heartbreaking. Odysseus has tried SO HARD for SO LONG to be a good person. He never wanted any of this! He never wanted to be ruthless! But over and over and over again he is just doomed by the gods narrative.

UUUGH. It makes No Longer You (probs my fave song of the musical) EVEN BETTER because yeah, “I see a man who gets to make it home alive, but it’s no longer you.”

The gods have forced Odysseus time and time again to be ruthless. He has fought for twenty years to retain some semblance of his innate desire for mercy only to watch it ripped away from him, piece by devastating piece.

I utterly adore the way we see him broken down until the ONLY thing he has left for any chance at happiness or normalcy is making it home to his wife and son.

He starts out this whole journey with the goal of getting himself AND his crew home only to watch them die in increasingly horrific ways because of the impossible situations they keep getting forced into.

I feel like Oddyseus’s first major breakdown happens in The Underworld. That’s where it finally all starts to be too fucking much. Where he hits his limit. Just the “All I hear are screams, every time I dare to close my eyes. I no longer dream, only nightmares of those who've died.”

And then the utterly gut wrenching scene with his mom. ( ༎ຶ⌑༎ຶ)

I feel like up to this point, yeah he’s concerned about what’s going on back at home, but this is the first time he’s straight up confronted with the fact things are changing there and there’s NOTHING he can do about it. His absolute worst fear has come true. He lost someone he loved forever because he couldn’t make it home.

How did she die? Odysseus doesn’t know. She could have died peacefully of old age or been slaughtered. Either way he wasn’t there to comfort her or protect her. She died not knowing if he would ever made it home. Even in death, she’s stuck forever wondering what happened to him and wishing she could see him again.

HE IS RIGHT THERE and she will never know because he was too late.

Like logically he knows time is passing in Ithaca too, but up to this point I feel like Ithaca is more of a concept to him than a reality. His last memories of his home are of his wife and infant son from over a decade ago. Obviously they’ve aged too, but he hasn’t seen the effects of the passage of time on them. He doesn’t know what’s become of them or his country without its king.

It makes so much sense that this is when he finally starts to consider ruthlessness over mercy. Especially after Tiresias implies he will never make it home. Like obvs we know he will and that Tiresias just means he won’t be the same person when he does, but Odysseus doesn’t know that.

Regardless, Tiresias is right. The only way Odysseus will ever make it home is to cut away at everything that makes him who he is. His morality, his desire for mercy, his loyalty to his crew, his friends...

His friends who trust him, only for him to keep leading them to horrific deaths time and time again by clinging to his desire for mercy.

God, and then there’s Mutiny. This whole time Eurylochus has been begging Odysseus to focus on the needs of the few instead of the many, to “cut their losses.” And now Odysseus finally does by sacrificing six men and Eurylochus cannot fucking believe it, even after trying to convince him to do this EXACT same thing back in Puppeteer.

I think Eurylochus ultimately wants Odysseus to keep leading them, even when he doesn’t agree with his decisions, because he doesn’t trust himself to make to put the lives of everyone else first. He relies so much on Odysseus as his moral compass and now that compass has been shattered into a million pieces.

This is not his captain. This IS NOT his friend. This is also the moment Eurylochus realizes Odysseus intends to get home by any means necessary and that fucking terrifies him.

He could always count on Odysseus to keep the safety of the crew first and foremost, to be their pillar of strength in the face of adversity, but now? Now he can’t.

Besides, he’s finally convinced himself that they’ll never make it home, so why should they keep fighting? Why not just try and live out the rest of their lives in peace? Why invite more suffering and pain into their lives?

Then comes Thunder Bringer, where Eurylochus’s biggest fear is realized. Odysseus openly admits he will do whatever it takes to make it home to his wife and son.

At this point, Odysseus is desperately trying to justify all of the horrors and loss they’ve been through. Hundreds of men who trusted him have died because of him. He believes he’s led them astray over and over again.

But if he doesn’t make it home, what was the point of all of this? Does he give up now for the sake of his remaining crew, or does he honor the sacrifice of those they’ve lost by finally making it home? Every single one of them has died in their attempts to get home. How can he sleep at night if he gives up on getting there now? It would mean they all died for absolutely nothing.

And like, it’s a fucked up decision but I think it’s fair to say Odysseus is running on pure PTSD and vibes at this point. He is literally staring ZEUS in the face. Zeus who pretty much made him kill a defenseless child “for the greater good.” Zeus who is asking him to make another impossible choice.

His remaining crew has already admitted they’ve given up on getting home, but Odysseus hasn’t. If no one makes it back, how will the family and friends they’ve left behind ever find closure? They’ll spend the rest of their days living and dead waiting for them to come home like his mother has. They’ll descend into the underworld never knowing what happened to them and hoping against hope that they’ll still see them again.

Hope is such a powerful thing, but it can also be devastating. Isn’t it kinder to let them know what happened than to let them die, trapped warring with grief and hope forever? Because not knowing, while it can give them hope, it’s a false hope at this point. It’s not real.

Isn’t it crueler to leave them scanning the horizon for the rest of their lives, looking for ships that will never come? Isn’t it crueler to force thousands upon thousands of voices to join his mother’s in the underworld?

Isn’t it kinder to give them closure? To let them finally be able to fully grieve?

The least he can do is tell their loved ones what happened to them, isn’t it?

And now, twenty years later, he’s finally within sight of Ithaca. Now he can justify all of his decisions, all of the pain, all of the heartache. He’s can do the one good thing left to him after all these years.

So of course that’s when Poseidon strikes in a final act of devastating cruelty. All because Odysseus blinded rather than outright killed his son. His son who planned to kill and eat him and every single one of his 600 crew members.

It’s simultaneously so cathartic and heartbreaking when Odysseus first brings the trident down on Poseidon. Especially after pleading with him one last time to stop this never ending cycle of violence and pain.

But Poseidon refuses to stop. He’s more concerned about his pride and his reputation than in admitting he’s taken things too far. This so-called god has the nerve to have killed almost every man in his crew and then tell Odysseus he hasn’t suffered enough. He’s already paid for his actions with the blood of hundreds of men. What debt could he possibly have left to pay?

Tbh I would not have blamed Odysseus for torturing Poseidon for the rest of his days. And, if he chose ruthlessness over mercy, that’s what he would have done. Poseidon would’ve gotten exactly what he wanted. Lol, just not like this.

But no. Even in the midst of all of this, of getting to hear this murderer, this god cry out and beg for the mercy he denied him so many times, Odysseus stops. Poseidon finally knows what it’s like to feel helpless and to feel unending pain.

Surprised Pikachu face! He’s not a fan!

Odysseus has pled with the gods to be merciful for over twenty years now. Zeus, Athena, Poseidon, Calypso, Circe… He’s begged them time and time again to see there are other ways than ruthlessness. He managed to get through to Circe, since she alone viscerally understood the pain and loss he’d been through. And now all the rest of them finally understand too.

Athena goes to Zeus on his behalf to convince him and a whole host of other gods to give Odysseus another chance. Calypso lets him leave her island. Zeus realizes the folly of his own pride when he nearly kills his own daughter. Poseidon agrees to call off the storm.

It’s such a fascinating story and I utterly adore Jay’s interpretation of it. Mercy is what ultimately gets Odysseus home, even if he had to be ruthless to get it.

AND AND AND all the callbacks in the songs, the bastardization of moments of joy. The reclamation of moments of horror!!! T^T

JAY WHEN I CATCH YOU.

[kimuramasaya]

i showed my cat the gif but she wasn't at all interested so maybe she thought it sucked too 😂 my first set that i posted, my sizing is all off idk what tf i thought i was doing but i liked the gifs so i posted them <3 thank u !!! 🥰

i'm so glad i devoted my time to them because i love them sm !! :( they're already in my ult group list 💞 i loved ep 9, that's one of my favourites so far. they're all just so funny. i can't even pick a single member who makes me laugh bc they all do 😅

hopefully their next comeback isn't a year, i can't imagine how hard it was to wait :((

a friend of mine sent me a mashi clip and I was like isgxizbsjsh 😍😭 but honestly junkyu caught my eye first !! junkyu and doyoung 🎀

and i loved the mysterious class, forgot what it was called 😅 they were all really good actors <3 haruto especially!!! i cried. the last episode had me sobbing 😭💞💞💞💞 i have watched the tmap one as well <3

giffing definitely has a learning curve to it. I look back at some of the stuff I made waay back in my litblr days, and I can't believe how bad some of it is lol (granted the file size limit was 1 mb back then so. not completely my fault). we're all learning as we go, and you're off to a great start ☺️

the variety training is so funny some of them got so into the scream in silence game 😂 truly just a group of comedians. the babysitting episodes are my favorites they're just so sweet 🥺 the horror ep also makes me laugh every time. haruto's big ol tears, asahi's complete lack of a reaction, the jeongwoo meme it's all perfect

I'm hoping they'll have a second comeback later this year and I'm going to put that energy out there, but I also have no trust whatsoever in whygee

I really enjoy choreo, so I watched their dance practices first, which is exactly how mashi got me. junkyu gets a lot of people though so you're definitely not alone. I mean, the boy's a meme. and doyoung's ability to do/say things that should be cringey without actually being cringey is so funny to me

haruto was honestly incredible in the mysterious class, and I'd love to see him take on more acting roles. the tmap drama ep makes me cringe a bit but they did a really good job with that too!

[smallerinfinities]

I came to some realizations after Azriel’s bonus chapter.

a) it took place in the middle of the book, not the end. This was also relatively close to the time where Elain kept stating that she wanted a human mate, not a fae.

b) I think Azriel is extremely desperate for love. Do I think he feels some sort of attraction (whether sexual or romantic) towards Elain? Yes. Do I think that he’s also just extremely needy for love after seeing his two brothers find their mates in quick succession and now he sees his chance to find a partner himself after lining after the same girl for 500 years? Yes.

c) Azriel needs to fix his damn self because I don’t like the fact that he said he hadn’t thought further then bedding Elain when she seems like a sweet girl who has a whole lot more character exploring to come (or at least I hope so). Also dislike how Lucien respects Azriel and the 2 seemed to get along quiet well throughout the book, yet Azriel was ready to legit kill Lucien who is an absolute gem to me.

d) I find it interesting how the bonus chapter started with Elain and Azriel and ended with Gwyn and Azriel. Might be foreshadowing, might be a build up for angst, idk.

e) I can’t wait for that necklace re gift to blow up in Azriel’s face.

f) I don’t like how Elain is treating Lucien. It may be the fact that she doesn’t want to accept that she is now Fae and has a Fae mate, but at least talk to the man or at the very least be civil to him. Lucien is one of my favourite characters and that dude just can’t catch a break. I’m not saying she has to accept him (because no man is entitled to Elain, she is her own woman and should be treated as such) but don’t string my poor fox boy around. And especially don’t entertain the idea of sleeping with another guy under the same roof as him. Either reject him or talk it out with him.

g) there are so many different ways these next books can go but my main concern is how sjm is gonna find new worldly conflicts (not romantic ones because holy shit we have enough of those) because it kinda feels like the storyline is just being dragged a bit.

h) I’m a Gwynriel shipper but I’m not completely opposed to Azriel and Elain getting together. As long as Gwyn and Lucien don’t get fucked over (especially Gwyn considering her past with men) and both Az and El don’t have to sacrifice integral parts of their characters to be together then I’m cool with it.

I really liked ACOSF and there are so many different paths that the storyline could now go. We got 2 different cliches that could be done too lmao. SJM is a talented writer and I do want to see all my favourite characters get a happily ever after and while I’m excited to see what’s to come, I can’t help but be worried that I might be let down. This series is a great one, but it’s going on for a while. I sometimes feel like it should have just ended after ACOWAR, but I still have faith in the next couple of books. I also wish that this fandom wouldn’t be so nasty when it comes to something as trivial as ships, but oh well! Sorry for the ridiculously long ask, but I had so many thoughts about that bonus chapter!

okay okay so I’ve been on my phone for a couple days and when I read this I was like WOW THIS NEEDS A FULL KEYBOARD RESPONSE BECAUSE SEVERAL POINTS WERE MADE--

first off, I totally agree that this stuff is just discourse and like no one should be fighting or like idfk sending weird death threats over ships or the simple fact that they liked a book or a chapter like it’s not that deep it’s just speculation let people like what they like....but back to the Az bonus chapter...

I specifically want to talk about points B, C, and F. 

B-- so I think you’re so right about Az being desperate for love. like he’s gone so long feeling that unrequited shit for Mor and before maybe it wasn’t a big deal to him because his brothers were seemingly unattached too. but now that Rhys and Cassian are both mates and fucking head over heels for Feyre and Nesta, I think he’s feeling his separation from that happiness acutely and it just seems like star-crossed fate shit that there should be three brothers and three sisters (as cheesy as it feels and sounds and how trope-y it is) so maybe the lust he feels for Elain is just that base need to feel SOMETHING in the face of what he can see and hear and fckn *smell* at the River House and the House of Wind every damn day. and Elain is frankly an easy target. she’s quiet with a sense of humor and a fuckload of trauma....she’s someone for Az to be gentle with and nurture. and when he says “maybe the cauldron was wrong” like you feel the pain and resentment there...that the other sisters were seemingly made for his brothers and he should be left out. I feel bad for him but at the same time....

C--DUDE WHAT THE FUCK ABOUT KILLING LUCIEN AND HOW EASY IT WOULD BE....like that’s some Class A territorial fae bastard shit right there...not seen since the likes of Rowan Whitethorn (though in truth I do love it on him but he was that way for AELIN, HIS MATE)...I don’t think Sarah breathed life into the idea of the cauldron making a mistake for nothing, but I also just don’t think she belongs in the Night Court...all those comments about how much Elain would love Spring Court and sunshine and light....I’ve said this before but the Court of Nightmares solstice scene where Cassian basically calls Elain plain in her Night Court black dress was a huge yikes for me. like the Night Court clearly dims her spirit. it doesn’t fit her aesthetic, you know? anyways I’m getting off track...Azriel’s preoccupation with Elain right now from his POV seems almost entirely sexual so maybe like rethink that bro. 

F--okay yes, while I don’t think Elain is “beholden” to anyone and no male should feel entitled to her or be FIGHTING BLOOD DUELS OVER HER WTF???? I do agree that she has treated Lucien pretty much like shit. she hasn’t tried to understand the situation or the history (at least from what we’ve seen) of the mating bond and how neither of them chose this. like Lucien is as much a victim of the situation as she is, he just has the benefit of understanding what it means in fae culture to have a mate and the pain it causes to reject it. like she just avoids him instead of out-right saying no so he’s just being strung along. like let him go if you don’t want to be with him. and while Lucien has made some shitty decisions (I will never forgive him for his complicity in ACOMAF), this kind of pain shouldn’t be his punishment...like Rhys wouldn’t have to deal in absolutes with Azriel if Elain would just MAKE THE DECISION because then it’s not a challenge for Elain. it’s Elain making a choice, just like they’re fond of allowing women to make in the damn Night Court. my problem with Elain has never been with her femininity or her perceived lack of personality (which is canon now pls) it has always been with her lack of action and the inner circle enabling her to sit and do nothing--EVEN WHEN SHE MIGHT WANT TO. yes I’m talking about that moment where everyone is all up in arms about “exposing” Elain to the darkness of the dread trove and all but throwing Nesta to the wolves...I screamed when Cassian was like “BUT NESTA SHOULD???” ugh pissed me off so much. 

anyways clearly we both have a lot of feelings lmao I will scream about this series until I die I s2g