#even when he gets midly threatening

[alastorss]

Yahallo! I absolutely love your writing!! And and I just saw the Alastor x cat!demon Reader you did and I was wondering if perhaps you may be able to add more ideas of your own to it? With the reader's feline behavior and what would Alastor's thoughts would be on it and such

If you're okay with that ofc aaa

a/n: the cat demon!reader au has grown on me a lot and i have some ideas about them and alastor together!

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

• I mentioned it a little bit in this fic, but I like to imagine you just show up at his door with dead rodents you hunted and you leave them there as little courting gifts. He's sort of off put by it at first thinking you're trying to threaten him, but eventually he realizes you're being nice to him and he eases up about it

• Was never really an animal person when he was alive but he's come to appreciate your company. He'll let you lounge in his lap while he reads, or curl up in his bed with him when he's in a really good mood

• You talk more than other demons which initially irked him, but he got used to it and even enjoys hearing you go on about your day to him

• Thinks it's rather cute that your ears go flat against your head when you get mad at him

• On that note, he also thinks it's pretty funny that they're a dead giveaway to how you feel in most situations. How did he find out you had a raging crush on him? Your ears perking up everytime he walked into a room really did not help your case

• Is so deathly insecure about his own tail but loves yours for some reason. Like, he's midly jealous of it until he realizes he would hate his life if he had that attached to him 24/7

• One time Angel tricked him into saying "little meow meow" out loud and he couldn't look you in the eyes for a week

~

taglist: @the-lake-is-calling @dragons-and-dwarves-are-nice @averylonelysea @bri22222 @cxrsedwxrlds @amarokofficial @anae-naea-zacheria @for-hearthand-home (send an ask to be added!)

[zenphiaaa]

Cornelia Street (Giyu Tomioka)

Shinobu blinked with her smile frozen on her face. "What do you mean you have a wife? When on earth did this happen? That poor girl! Did you coerced her?" The young woman snided to the male sitting across from her

"That sounds like too much effort to get married that way." Giyu responded in a bored tone. "I'm not sure why this is such a surprise. You guys all have significant others." The dark haired male pointed out.

"I think what Shinobu means to say is that you tend to keep to yourself. So it's a bit of surprise for you to talk about yourself." Mitsuri gently explained, trying to calm everyone down.

"When did you get married? What's her name? Marriage is such a beautiful thing, you're extremely lucky Tomioka!" Rengoku spoke out in a thunderous tone. Giyu just sighed and nodded his head in thanks.

Part of the resaon why he told no one of his marriage was because he knew that his coworkers...friends(?) would respond like that. It was a headache once the group found some sort of excitment.

"You didn't answer the questioned Tomioka. That's not a very poltie thing to do." Shinobu warned with a pointed look, the smile she wore still frozen on her face.

Giyu let out a long sigh before pulling his phone out of his pocket, he typed on the device for a few seconds before showing the screen to the group. "Her name is Y/N, we've been married for two years now. No we don't have children and we don't want any so please don't ask. She is also only six months younger than me and she works as a nurse." Giyu quickly explained like a crash course video.

The picture on the screen was one of the wedding day. The picture shows Giyu holding Y/N up bridal style, both with grins and a light blush dusted on their faces.

"Congratulations my dear friend. I'm glad you found happiness." Rengoku smiled brightly at the shorter male.

Mitsuri let out a loud gasp as she somehow manged to get the phone out of Giyu's grasp and began to scroll over all of the weddings day photos that Giyu had saved in a folder on his phone. "She's beautiful! You guys look so cute together!" Mitsuri squealed.

"Yes." Was all Giyu had said before plucking his phone out of the women's grip. "Can we get back to the meeting now? This is a business lunch after all." The dark haired male mumbled, pocketing the phone back into his jeans.

"Of course, but you know that Mitsuri won't stop asking for us to meet her. You wouldn't want to break Mitsuri's poor heart and have a certain snake owner threaten you? Right?" Shinobu teased the other, although her eyes didn't follow the cheerfulness that her tone indicated.

"If you guys want to meet her, you'll have to wait until her schedule is free. She's the most busy out of the two of us." Giyu replied.

"Your wife is ordering, I think." Muichiro suddenly spoke as he pointed behind the group. Giyu immediately whipped his head around and his eyes focused on his wife's H/C hair. The man softly smiled at the sight of his significant other.

"Wow, you are so whipped." Shinobu observed.

Y/N then turned around to look for a table after ordering. Her eyes immediately broke out across her face as she started to approach her lover. "Giyu! Your at a lunch meeting today?" She questioned, placing a kiss on his checks within Giyu's arms.

Giyu responded and wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her in for a kiss without saying a word.

Mitsuri in return let out a loud squeal which caused the couple to back away from each other, faces flushed with embarrassment. Despite wearing a blush, Giyu still looked midly annoyed that his time with his wife was interrupted. Even if he was supposed to focus on work, his wife was here now. How was he supposed to focus on work when the love of his life was holding him? Quite unfair really.

"Sorry, I'm interrupting aren't I?" Y/N quietly said to the group, not able to meet anyone's eyes.

"Nonsense! We were in fact just talking about you! All good things nothing to worry about!" Rengoku spoke up, saving Y/N from the embarrassment.

"I see. Well I just wanted to say hello to Giyu." Y/N hesitantly spoke with a tight smile, "I'll be out of your hair now. I just came to pick up lunch for me and Insouke."

"What did he do now?" Giyu sighed but kept his arm around his wife's waist. Looking up at her with a soft gaze.

"Ah," Y/N nervously looked the other way as she spoke, "Well he decided to try to fly? Climbed the roof, got attacked by a wasp nest, then kinda fell off the roof."

The group froze and blinked at the woman like she was crazy.

"He's an idiot." Giyu quickly replied, "I'll talk to him when I get home."

"Ah, we're watching some neighborhood kids during the day, while it's parent week at the school. Insouke is just a wild child? He loveschallenging himself, although I wish he didn't do it in extremes." Y/N thought outloud to herself.

"Order for Y/N!" A worker called out.

"I'll leave you guys to it then! Sorry for interrupting! Nice to meet you guys!" Y/N almost bowed a goodbye, before giving her husband one last kiss and left as fast as she came.

The group blinked before turning to look over at Tomioka. Giyu just shrugged as he sipped on his iced tea,"She gets nervous around new people." Was all he said.

"Well, we must have dinner together! She's so nice and so sweet!" Mitsuri blurted out with heart eyes, clasping her hand together in excitement.

"I'll let her know." Giyu said, as he pulled out a folder. "Can we get back on topic now? We only have fifteen minutes left of this meeting."

[jessysapphireblue]

Play with Food Luffy x Oc

Nicknames included are Lu and Je. Female is a born magician without a Devil Fruit, but you can use it as y/n since nothing else is mentioned.

fluff

You looked across the deck, after talking with Nami by the steer for the course, just to see your beloved boyfriend looking like he had a crisis, gloom with face in the grass, whining.

Walking down you joined his side, stroking his black hair in between your fingers. "mmh...feels good", Luffy beamed and slowly turned his face to you. "Je" "Hey, Lu. Tell me, why do you look so gloom?", you sat down and he directly slung his arms around you, head burried in your chest, as he sighed. "Sanji kicked me out because I got hungry and all the scent of the meat! He also said that if I try to steal some, he won´t be giving me food for the rest of the day!", he finally looked into your eyes, a pouty look and puppy eyes. "Je, can´t you say something? You´re a girl. Sanji is weak by you"

You began to laugh, cupping his cheeks. "Can´t promise the success but I can try" "Really?!", your boyfriend began to beam with a sunshine smile as you nodded, giving his nose a quick peck. "Like I said, I can try", you hummed as Luffy let you go, already cheering for the meat, making you stand up and walking to the kitchen. "Hi, Sanji", you greeted the chef as his eyes turned into hearts. "MELLORINE! Oh, my beloved Goddess! What may I do for you?~~" "I just take some water" "On my way, my Goddess!", he was faster by the fridge than you thought, as you sat down by the counter. "Here you go, a nice cool water for you, Madmoiselle~", he bowed a little, making you chuckle. "Thank you, I also heard you won´t give Lu some meat" "I was gone for only a few seconds and he already wanted to snatch some!" "Did you threaten him?" "...perhaps a little, my goddess" A short laughter escaped you as you looked at the food. "Sanji? I might have an idea", you smiled at him while he looked midly confused.

Just a few minutes later you exit the kitchen with a plate as "You have the food?!", Lu exclaimed from above you, making you breath out. "One day, you´ll scare me to death...haaa!", you leaned against the door, calming your heart as Lu jumped next to you. "...is that it?" "Following, bub. The food is not ready yet BUT how does a little game sound?" "A game?" "Including meat" Lu crossed his arms and tilted his head a little. "A meat game?" You only hummed and walked onto the grass deck, to sit under the tree, as your boyfriend joined you. "Is the prize the meat!?" "Yes. When you get it right, you can ate the pieces" "I´M IN!", he shouted, coming so near that your noses touched. "Ok ok, calm down", you pushed him slightly down to sit next to you.

"What game do I play?!" "You have to guess the meat by smell" "...Ha?!", he was more confused now as you tapped your little pouch by your belt as a long piece of cloth came out. "Do you trust me?" "Je, I trust you with my life! You´re always there for me! So, yes!" "Then, I now blindfold you" "Ok!", he grinned at you as you did it. "How many fingers do you see? And NO Haki" "Buh", he began to pout, which made you laugh. "Ok, ready?" "So, when I get it right I can eat it?" "Yes, but ONLY then" "Ha! I´m a meat expert!", he crossed his arms confidently, which made you chuckle. "Ok, Mr. Meat expert, we shall begin" Luffy nodded while you held him a piece in front of his nose, making him almost drool. "And?" "mmh this is Lion?" "Are you sure or not?" "Lion! It´s Lion meat!" "Correct! It´s from the Lion you got from the last island", you hummed and feed him the meat. "So good! I like this game!" "Well, glad you enjoy it. Ready for the next round?" "yes!"

Round for round continued until no meat was left, as Luffy grinned. "Is there more?" "Well", you looked at the empty plate before you got an idea. "One last thing, yes" "Ok! Hit me!" "Lu, this time, it´ll be different. First, you got to taste then tell me what it was" "Oh! This will be even better! Ok! Ready Je. Tell me when" A soft smile came over your lips as you leaned slowly in, Luffy still waiting before you closed your eyes and gently kissed your boyfriends lips. His were slightly chapped and he tasted after meat but you loved him for this. The kiss was short and when you pulled away to open your eyes, you already saw his black owl eyes looking at you. "Lu" "That was so short! You know I love your kisses! Give me more", he cupped your cheeks and got you back while kissing you fully. A blush came over your cheeks before your eyes closed and you could feel him smile.

"And? The game?" "Best one", he whispered against your lips before diving back into your lips

[orangesideirrational]

drabble (technically 4) inspired by @cartilagehumdrum 's horror mvt au!

(i originally shared this in the discord server)

(if you see red throughout this then its a break in the text to explain smthn rq/ break up the different drabbles because its 4am lol)

be warned- gore? kinda? vauge depictions of gore.

you dont need to have read mvt horror to understand this, but it will definitetly make far more sense if you do

edit- sorry for forgetting but this entire thing is inspired by this post!

sorry about all the spelling errors and i hope you enjoy!!

-

'benny...' champagne started. benny's heart quickened and he just knew that champagne could hear it.

'whasup, champ?' he grinned unsteadily.

'can i.. have something? of yours?' champagne asked, with a voice that suggested a deep hunger. benny stepped back, not letting his smile dip but feeling fear pulse through him.

'well ya already got 3 of my ribs and a kidney, what more do ya really need?' benny asked lightheartedly, trying desperately not to let the fear infect his voice

'i was thinking...' champagne said slowly, stepping towards benny smoothly in a way that made benny's heart skip with something other than fear for a moment.

'maybe.. i could have your heart?' benny was sure champagne had somehow stopped it for a moment as he said that, because he was suddenly breathless. and very very aware that he was pressed against a wall, face an inch away from the doctor's, in a room alone with a quite-possible-psychopath that had already stolen several of his bones and an organ.

'd-dont i need that o-one t-ta survive?' benny stuttered, trying not to look at champagne's lips because that was not appropriate when his life was being threatened. even if the guy threatening him was very attractive.

'oh, ill keep it safe.' champagne assured, placing his hand over benny's chest but not touching, like if he did he wouldnt be able to stop himself from just reaching in and just...

benny took a stuttering breath and-

sterling came crashing through into the room calling for benny before stopping and making champagne leave the room.

'you ok benny? i know that guy gets to you a lot.' sterling asked. benny nodded shakily and assured him that he was fine, he would be ok.

what terrified benny most, however, was that before sterling came running in the word on his lips was yes

and champs pov-

(for this- bold= emphasis italics= flesh)

'benny...' champagne started. his heart thudded in his chest and champagne relished in the sound. it was so melodic. so pretty. just from champagne saying benny's name. now how fast can you make it go?

'whasup, champ?' benny's smile was so pretty. maybe you can take some teeth next! champagne felt a familiar hunger that wasnt his brewing as he stepped forward towards benny. just like a beast hunting its prey!! ew, hunt.

'can i.. have something? of yours?' why are you asking permisson? thats so boringg. just reach in and- champagne almost shushed it, but felt it might ruin the moment.

'well ya already got 3 of my ribs and a kidney, what more do ya really need?' oh he was so cute. his fear is so so fun! so sweet and nice and-

'i was thinking...' champagne drawled, smoothly stepping towards benny thats not all fear though- ooh this makes it MUCH more fun! and letting a smile crawl across his face, showing off his sharp teeth.

'maybe.. i could have your heart?' champagne was asking for so much, and benny didnt even know it. its not that much, just another- delicious, mind you- organ he had trapped benny, now, against a wall. he would back off when benny said no, because he would almost certainly say no, but for now this was fun. not in the normal flesh way either. this was fun for him.

benny stuttered something out, but champagne was distracted by the way his eyes ew. eyes. kept flicking down to champagne's lips. champagne didn't kiss him, it likely wouldnt be a pleasent experience for either of them i mean youve never really TRIED, but he really really wanted to. in a midly terrifying way (and not in the usual terror-filled way, either)

'oh, ill keep it safe' champagne assured. he needed benny to let him have this. his heart. yum. not to eat. he wasnt lying. he was going to keep it safe. he promised.

then someone came crashing in and ruined it.

champagne didnt hold grudges per say but if that guy was the next to be turned into a dinosaur it would be his own damn fault.

he was sure benny would say no, but the moment itself felt special, somehow.

heres also a few versions of 'if sterling didnt interrupt!' (he is being attacked by moths)

benny took a stuttering breath and swallowed a lump in his throat.

he should say no. he has to say no. this is crazy. he should just say no. or maybe dont even say it, just push champagne away and run. SAY. NO.

'sure.' benny said, breathless already. champagne blinked. was he surprised?

'oh, are ya surprised?' benny grinned, pretending his heart wasnt going a mile a minute and his throat was dry and he was bracing for sweet pain and that he wasnt so in love with this insane doctor that probably wouldve had his medical lisence revoked if this wasnt the literal apocalypse

'really?' champagne sounded breathless too, like they had both run a marathon and were now here. with benny agreeing for champagne to take his heart oh god this was insane-

'sure. as long as you put it back before i die.' benny smiled, heart going insane (just like he did. he mustve gone insane. champagne mustve made him insane because there was no way he had just agreed to let someone LITERALLY BORROW HIS HEART-)

'of course.' champagne seemed shocked and pleased and hungry and dangerous and- and beautiful and benny felt a hand cup his cheek before he passed out.

champs pov

(again- bold = emphasis italics = flesh)

benny's shuddering breath landed on champagne's neck and it felt so human that for a moment the flesh didn't exist and it was just them and-

'sure.' benny sounded breathless. champagne blinked. YES. YES YES YES YES YES YES TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT GIVE IT TO US CRUSH IT IN YOUR HANDS GIVE IT TO US- benny was supposed to say no

'oh are ya surprised?' benny snarked acting like champagne couldnt feel his heart beating and hear its beautiful melody and like he couldnt feel their chests heaving why are you so worked up? it should be us because were about to get FOOD

'really?' champagne breathed and ignored bennys snark. because he had to be sure before he took his heart. WHY DO YOU CARE? JUST FEED US FEED US FEED US FEED US FOOD FOOD FOOD FOOD-

'sure. as long as you put it back before i die.' benny smiled and champagne disregarded any idea of stealing teeth the flesh ever had because holy shit champagne was in love.

'of course.' champagne promised. he didnt care how loud it screamed he was going to keep that FUCKING promise. he cupped benny's cheek which was a mistake because now he really wanted to kiss him-

and benny fell to the floor. champagne followed and ended on his knees next to an unconcious benny and the flesh was going insane.

champagne wasnt going to hurt benny. he wasnt going to crush his heart in your hands then eat it then feed it to us then then then oh my everything the possibilities GIVE IT TO US GIVE IT TO US GIVE IT TO US hurt benny.

champagne reached his hand into benny's chest and it was warm and beautiful and TAKE EVERYTHING WARP IT FEED US WAKE HIM UP AND MAKE HIM SCREAM so human that champagne almost felt jealous as his hand closed around benny's heart and he didn't even want to disturb it because of all the stupid human poetry about love and all that shit and champagne blinked back the red red red that was seeping into his vision because he was not the flesh and he fucking promised and he withdrew his arm from benny's chest and he closed his hands around his ears because he didnt care what they screamed he was going to keep benny safe- his heart. he was going to keep his heart safe.

[jenlizrose]

I appreciate Duolingo teaching me what these words mean...However the sentences could do with some work LMAO.

[jjmaybanksbaby]

congrats on 500 lovely!! what a huge milestone :)) idk if u write for jiara but i'd love for u to do 1/2 from the random list?? u can change up the characters/ship if u want :))

thank you so much! ur so sweet!!!

ooo okay these work really good together i like them and im gonna stick with jiara

#1 Random - “Quit touching me, your feet are cold!”

#2 Random - “Sharing is caring, now give me the hoodie!”

•••

It had taken Sarah a whole hour to convince the Pogues that a beach party on Figure Eight was worth attending. John B had been down to go since Sarah mentioned it because he’d do just about anything his girl wanted. Pope, Kie  and JJ, on the other hand, were not so keen on going to a Kook party. It was only after Sarah promised that they could make a pit stop on the way and she’d buy them “the good stuff” to drink that they finally agreed to go.

As the Pogues were piling into the Twinkie, Kie noticed that JJ hadn’t grabbed a hoodie or anything to bring with him. It was nearing the end of summer and at the night, the fall breeze would move in, adding a chill to the air. 

“JJ, aren’t you gonna cold?” Kie asked him. Usually when the party was at the Boneyard or the chateau, JJ could run inside and grab some warmer clothes but this party was on the other side of the island and Kie couldn’t stop her mom side from coming out to make sure boyfriend would be okay.

He shook his head no. “I’ll be fine.” He gave her a quick peck before climbing into John B’s van. 

...

In Sarah’s defense, the party wasn’t too bad. Rafe, Topper and Kelce had yet to make an appearance which was the way the Pogues hoped it would stay. Sarah and John B were busy dancing with each other. Pope was trying but mostly failing to pick up a cute Touron who had wondered into the party. And Kie and JJ were sitting around the bonefire. Kie wasn’t drinking since she’d offered to be the designated driver for the night but JJ was borderline drunk which was causing his softer side to emerge.

JJ laid his head on Kie’s shoulder and closed his eyes for a moment. 

“Kie.” He whispered into her ear. 

She turned her head to look at him. “Yeah J?” 

“I’m cold.” 

Kiara laughed. “I knew you would be. That’s why I told you to bring a sweatshirt.” 

JJ sighed. “Let me have yours.” He motioned to the one tied around Kie’s waist. 

“But then what if I get cold?” She asked him. 

“Then I’ll cuddle you like this.” JJ wrapped his arms around Kie and pulled her closer to him. 

She let out a small scream and tried to wiggle out of JJ’s grasp. “JJ! I swear- quit touching me. You feet are so cold.” She finally broke free from him and looked down to see a small pout on JJ’s face. Kie rolled her eyes. “Next time, just listen to me babe.” 

JJ crossed his arms over his chest. “You know what they say?” He asked. 

“What?” Kie replied. 

“Sharing is caring. Now give me the hoodie.” JJ reached out to grab the sweatshirt around Kie waist but Kie jumped away before he could. 

“No way Maybank. You want this hoodie? You’re gonna have to come and get it.” With that she took off running down the beach. 

It took a second for JJ to realize what was happening but he jumped up and sprinted after her. Even midly intoxicated, JJ was still much faster than Kiara so it took a minute for him to catch up to her. JJ grabbed Kie’s waist and dragged her down until she landed in the sand with JJ on top of her. 

JJ stared down at Kie’s face with a small smirk. Then he moved his hand down to her waist and pulled the sweatshirt out from under her. “Thank you baby.”

“I’m gonna get you back for this JJ.” Kie said, trying her best to be threatening.

“I can’t wait to watch you try.” JJ said as he sat up and slipped the hoodie over his head. He looked down at it and then back at Kie. “Are you kidding me? This was my hoodie the whole time?”

A loud laugh escaped Kiara. “Maybe.”

“Oh now you’re really gonna get.” JJ said as he climbed back on top of Kie and attached his lips to her neck causing her to squeal.

come celebrate 500 followers with me!!!

[johnny-writes]

✏ Dragon maid for Kazuma

Send ✏ and a series and I’ll rewrite my muse to fit in that series’s universe! Accepting!

“What’s that crazy dragon maid is doing? It’s like an anime and at the same it’s not. I’m midly disappointed.”

I watched the first episode of Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid and didn’t progress further, so I’ll base on what I know.

Kazuma is Kobayashi’s neighbor. To her, he’s more of a mysterious presence, almost like a cryptid. She doesn’t know his name, she doesn’t really care about him other than the fact sometimes he lets garbage accumulate in his apartment. When it gets too unbearable she just drops a note under his door, threatening legal action and he complies.

One day, after a day of work, Kobayashi comments with Tohru that his neighbor‘s apartment is a mess. Interpreting that as a hint for her to clean his apartment, he invades his apartment overnight and cleans up everything, letting everything as good as new, cleaning even Kazuma.

In the morning, Kobayashi is awaken by the sound of someone slamming on her door. Drowsy she opens the door and sees an angry teenager complaining someone invaded his house and cleaned up everything.

After a few more discussion, Kobayashi learns that’s his neighbor and his name is Kazuma, a shut-in high school dropout. Tohru comments how hard it was to clean up his house, but she did it nonetheless.

Kazuma goes on a rant on how anime the situation looks and Kobayashi berates him for being immature, but Tohru ends up finding him amusing. She makes one comment about Kazuma’s manga collection, on how there’s a section of naked people doing funny things and this makes both Kazuma and Kobayashi blush.

After a while, Kazuma starts to open to up Tohru and Kanna, who think of him as an amusing human pet (and he doesn’t realize, seeing Tohru as some sort of big sister and Kanna as a little sister); he tells her how he became a shut-in due to a broken heart and general hopelessness with the world, and how he’s deceiving his parents because they think he’s in the city for a prestigious high school.

Kobayashi still doesn’t like him and thinks the best thing to do would be telling the truth to his parents, because he’s a NEET and she’s an office worker, but once in a while she tries to do something nice to him, like inviting him to eat real food instead of his diet of cheap ramen. In exchange, he recommends anime and games for them, he has an feeling for it and knows exactly what anime/game each of the cast would like.

Even though he tries to score with the girls, none are interested in him he doesn’t get a love interest (since he hasn’t moved on from Izumi the one who rejected him, getting a love interest would be harmful from a storytelling point of view), but it’s not really the point of his character arc because maybe he can get a surrogate family and maybe tell the truth to his parents.

[socialattractionuk]

Twitter account rates all the desperate and trashy moves of your exes

(Picture: @SheRatesDogs)

Dating isn’t all that pleasant, to put it midly.

A Twitter account has documented all the trashy text messages, DMs, Snapchats, and other creative platforms to connect with people, compiling an impressive list of horrible interactions.

SheRatesDogs is the account that reveals how dates turn from sweet to abusive, to bizarre, threatening, and just plain weird.

The woman behind it is Michaela Okland and she tells Metro.co.uk why she’s set it up.

This happened when one woman blocked her ex on social media (Picture: @SheRatesDogs)

‘I was looking at the account WeRateDogs where cute dogs are rated above 10/10 and thought it’d be funny if there were an account where the dogs are sh*tty exes!’ she explains.

‘There’s no system to my ratings really, I just give them all negative numbers. The lowest I gave would probably be -12 if I’m like f*ck that’s messed up but the ratings aren’t super careful or specific.’

One of the best, according to Michaela, was from a man who’d told his date a different name and then texted her the next day using his real name. She simply replied: ‘It would’ve been a lot easier to remember (who you were) had you not told me your name was Mike last night.’

Michaela rated the whole thing -8.

Another story with the same rating went to the person who wrote, without context, on Snapchat: ‘I’m going to tie you up and pour hot candlewax on you but way too much to be sexy like at least a gallon.’

These are also her faves:

They’re really incredible creatures. What a healing process. -6/10 pic.twitter.com/ual3beaakk

— SheRateDogs (@SheRatesDogs) December 16, 2018

When you block him so he makes fake Instagram accounts to try to get you back (-1/10 dog) pic.twitter.com/5ENqsbkxV0

— SheRateDogs (@SheRatesDogs) December 18, 2018

Michaela’s account has soared in popularity and garnered 76,000 loyal followers who tune in to see the latest dating mishaps and also share their own.

While most are funny, some are quite worrying and turn hostile very quickly.

Some people who have been rejected in the chat have quickly turned angry and abusive.

Michaela makes sure she censors out all the names to protect the identity of those who send them in, simply leaving the contents of the message for all to see.

The account is full of gems that you could keep you scrolling for hours.

Here are a few of our faves:

I can’t even.. it’s so bad (-10/10) pic.twitter.com/5YHCPHwfje

— SheRateDogs (@SheRatesDogs) December 28, 2018

“Went on a date with this guy and ended up not going on a second… he sent this request a few months later” (-8/10) pic.twitter.com/2bZP5IzRj9

— SheRateDogs (@SheRatesDogs) December 28, 2018

I’ve honestly been laughing at this all morning (-7/10) pic.twitter.com/LsBlwaUl4K

— SheRateDogs (@SheRatesDogs) December 28, 2018

The girl didn’t even go to BU but she didn’t really care to argue it with him lmfao (-10/10) pic.twitter.com/v6m3I3gmux

— SheRateDogs (@SheRatesDogs) December 29, 2018

Each line of this gets better and better (-10/10) pic.twitter.com/ZgL5DQOe4j

— SheRateDogs (@SheRatesDogs) December 30, 2018

MORE: Man says women are too open about periods so naturally women open up even more

MORE: Why do men lie about their age on dating apps?