#even though it was about the space ship. on the page. like……. dang brain you legit have a one track mind now

[foxgloveinspace]

I went from a 2 pain day to a 4 and tbh I am….. very not happy oof😔

Edit: it’s more like a 5 tbh….

[fireflyknowles]

Space Orcs - Ship FirTy Stories

So, I'm trying to write more because I enjoy it and I hope you do too. I've had a hard time getting myself to sit down and focus though, so here is something real quick. I apologize for spelling and grammar errors, this is being done on my phone.

Alice has recently joined the crew of Ship FirTy on its long term research mission and the other races on this particular mission still haven't fully realized just how much energy a happy extrovert can have...

Alice is wandering the halls after her shift in the gardens. She promised the Crovank crew members that she would join them in a game night after her shift, but their shifts do not end for another couple of hours. She is unsure of the type of games that will be played, all the other races seem to avoid the Crovank game nights, but Alice is very excited to join. Memories of her famillies game nights back on earth bring a smile to her face and hope to her heart. Maybe adding this reminder of home to her time on board the ship could make her time away easier.

Deciding to grab some dinner beforehand, Alice heads to the cafeteria. Upon entering, she finds Jonathon reading while he eats his own dinner. She calls out a greeting to him but, like usual, is so buried in his book he doesn't notice. Rolling her eyes, she continues to the kitchen and gets a burger and fries. Greasy, relaxing, comfort food to kick off the night right! Dreaming about a soda pop to compete the meal Alice makes her way to where Jonathon is sitting and joins him.

The noise her plate makes when she sets it on the table startles Jonathon out of his book and has him looking around in confusion. As his eyes land on hers she sees recognition, denial, and finally grudging acceptance. Alice has been joining Jonathon for dinner at least 3 days a week since she boarded the ship. Jonathon has come to believe she wants human companionship in this strange new place, or she just wants to drive him crazy... he isn't completely sure yet... but, there she sits on a regular basis trying to get him to engage in conversation.

Tonight there is no small talk relating to the days prior activities, she simply asks "why does everyone avoid game nights?"

Not the least confused by this question as there is only 1 game night she could be showing of, he answers "Many of the other races just don't have the energy to keep up with the Corvanks, plus their games tend to last longer than anyone else is willing to play for."

Alice's eyes darken with worry as she says "I'm kind of nervous what if I ruin game night because I can't play their games?" Then a small mischievous smile plays across her mouth "But at the she time, im really excited to have some fun! I bet tonight will be a blast!"

"Don't worry about your ability to play the games, I'm sure half the reason they asked you is so they can learn more about you and they have been waiting for years to have a good reason to adapt their games. Also, I'm sure they would love learning about earth games if noneof their games work." Jonathon replies matter of factly.

Alice sighs out "thanks" with a small smile before digging into her dinner.

The subject seems to be over maybe Jonathon could go back to reading now... would that be rude? Well... she seemed busy eating and probably wouldn't notice if he just...

"What cha reading?" Alice asks starling Jonathon again. When she notices his reaction she giggles "sorry, didn't realize you'd already shut out the rest of the world."

One of the Corvank had been walking by and heard Alice's words. "How can he shut out the world? He is in an open area and the world is huge!"

Alice giggles again while Jonathon explains "Its an expression. It means that I focused so completely on what I was reading that I didn't use any of my other senses to keep track of the world around me. I forgot I wasn't alone."

"You can choose which senses work at any given time?!"

"No, all my senses were still sending my brain signals about what they picked up. But I was so focus on the words in my book and the picture they painted that I didn't register what was going on around me."

"Oh, so you do choose which senses to listen to! And what do you mean about the words in your book 'painted a picture'? I don't see a picture on those pages or any where else. Do you have to activate it? Do you need some form of implant?"

With a big sigh and an eye roll Jonathon mumbles to Alice "I never had this many questions asked before you joined the ship." Alice answers with a snort. She knows there were questions, he just never noticed.

To Crowshak Jonathon replied "I don't consciously choose to ignore any of my senses. Words painting a picture is another figure of speech, it means that the words used to describe something are so clear, accurate, precise, perfect that your mind can visualize exactly what the author was trying to get you to see."

About that time, Bo and the other Crovank crew members came along and joined the conversation. Asking more questions about these "figures of speech" and taking great delight in attempting to create a new game for future game nights based on these "fires of speech". Game night morphed into 20 questions and for the next couple of hours each time Jonathon tried to leave, the Crovank asked more questions. When Jonathon was finally able to extricate himself from the midst of the group other races had joined in, it was past his bed time, and Alice seemed to have even more energy than normal. He was kind of envious of her ability to gather energy in crowds, dang extroverts, and hoped she would be able to sleep that night. Tomorrow promised to be a long day...

[rogueninja]

Okay so we all know who your top ships are... who are your unpopular ships? Or obscure ships? What characters from what series do you think about often in either good or bad ways? Who is a character that you hate that others love? If you could rewrite a story or part of a book, what would it be and what would you do differently?

Ok I am digging through my brain right now bc if I’m not able to hyperfixate on something then I tend to forget I even liked it. Ok buckle in bc this is gonna be long af. YOU ASKED FOR THIS, REG.

I’m putting a readmore so as not to torture my followers lol

Thinking about Veronica Mars. About Veronica/Logan. Do they have a ship name?? But I love that show and i was THERE for them. They were kind of a surprise ship for me, in that when they got together I was like, wait, WHAT? Like I was totally caught off guard. But there first kiss is, like, sooo romantic to me haha. It’s my fave scene in the show. But Logan is suck a prick sometimes. And they break up like every five minutes. And every season Logan gets accused of murder which of course he ends up not being the murderer. And they get back together eventually and I’m like really? But deep down I am rooting for them lol. I really enjoyed the new season of Veronica Mars that came out last year, actually. The ending made me SO SAD THO.

I also used to watch Supergirl and I thought Kara and Mon-El were adorable. He was very Carswell Thorne-esque, RH, I *think* you would like him. I never watched past season 3(?) though, and he shoots off into space and I never caught up so a few months ago I actually googled what happens and [spoiler] he ends up marrying someone else in the future or something so I was like, ok I’m not investing any more time in this show lol. (Also I had to google Mon-El’s name just now bc i forgot which is a bad look BUT I WAS REALLY RIDE OR DIE FOR THEM FOR A WHILE lol). Also I loved Martian Manhunter in this show, he was my favorite character. But the CGI for him was awful, omg. He had practical makeup at first, they should have just stuck with that.

Speaking of Martian Manhunter, I also used to watch Young Justice and loved Miss Martian/Superboy. Am I basic??? lol oop. But I love basic love stories. Anyway, I thought they were super cute. In season 3 though they’re kind of on the rocks. I haven’t watched season 4. I also loved Artemis/Wally West, but of course that had to end tragically.

Also, let’s talk about Nightcrawler. Allow me to set the scene. Little Kat is 13 and just rediscovered the cartoon she saw a few times as a kid called X-Men: Evolution. And thus, a weird obsession with the German, blue demon boy began. I loved Kurt Wagner. In the cartoon he starts a relationship with Amanda Sefton and I thought they were a-dor-a-ble. She accepted him for who he was, and they had a really nice healthy relationship. A lot of ppl shipped him with Kitty too which i am honestly all for idec I JUST WANT THE BLUE BOI TO BE HAPPY.

Can we talk about A:TLA too??? Like, obviously Zutara, amiright? Power couple. Like, Kataang is.. fine, but its probably my least favorite part about the ending, haha. Also, consider: Tokka. Toph is bae and can get anyone she wants, and she clearly had kind of a crush on Sokka and I think they could have been awesome. It actually kills me that they never say who Lin and Suyin’s father is in LoK. I had a whole theory that it was that kid The Duke from Jet’s band based on like 2 scenes from the series. There’s a tumblr post I made about it somewhere in the ether lol.

I also just remembered Tahnorra (Tahno/Korra) from Legend of Korra. It’s hard for me to explain this one. It’s a weird combination of being hyperfixated on the first season of the show when it came out, and I think I stumbled upon some fic or something???? And I thought Tahno was hot or something??? And FUN FACT, he was voice by Rami Malek BEFORE HE WAS COOL. So like before Rami really got big I knew who he was. He also basically played the Avatar in Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 2 and I thought that connection was hilarious. It was kind of a problematic crack pairing but there was one author in particular whom i follow to this day hoping she’ll update her Tahnorra fics…. *sigh*

Okay one last ship…. I used to be ride or die for Outlaw Queen in Once Upon a Time (aka Regina/Robin Hood). Like, before TLC, I had a personal tumblr renaissance for that ship alone. My only existing published fanfic is for that ship. Taylor Swift’s 1989 came out that year and I related every dang song to that ship. I loved Regina so much and I just wanted her to be happy. That show is a dumpster fire, though, and spat all over my hopes and dreams. *sigh*

Also, lightning round for obscure pairings I ship and/or never talk about:

Frank Castle/Karen Page (The Punisher) ok this one isnt that obscure but I never talk about it… but the pining, oh god the pining

Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth (GoT) THEIR 5 SECONDS TOGETHER ARE THE ONLY WORTHY PART OF SEASON 8. everything after that never happened

I already listed Roy Mustang/Riza Hawkeye (FMAB) as a top pairing previously but I feel the need to mention it again bc it was for real my OG OTP… LIKE U WANNA TALK ABOUT PINING…. *sobs*

Percy/Annabeth (Percy Jackson and the Olympians) This used to be my fave book series and i loved how their relationship developed over the course of the books

Neville Longbottom/Luna Lovegood (Harry Potter) ok can we TALK ABOUT THIS??? They were both badass misfits and they were perfect for each other. But noooo JKR has to announce they marry some nobodies…. this is the only change the last movie did right

Midna/Link (Zelda: Twilight Princess) I honestly have no explanation for this lol

Qui-gon Jinn and Shmi (Star Wars) CAN U IMAGINE if anakin had a proper father figure and didnt have to abandon his mother to slavery

Obi-wan/Satine…. (Star Wars: The clone Wars) we know whats up

OK, to answer some of your other questions: character I hate that others love. HMMMM…….

This one seems too easy/obvious but Professor Snape? Like obviously there’s already a ton of discourse surrounding this but he was gross, mistreated his students for years, committed atrocities, couldn’t get over his high school crush, and we’re supposed to believe he’s a hero in the end and HARRY WOULD NAME HIS SON AFTER HIM….. uh no. “Always” is gross.

I’ve literally been wracking my brain for days and I can’t think of any more characters for this. OK I did some googling and I remembered some LOL.

Ross from friends…. I literally can’t stand him. He’s so entitled and just the worst. He tries to act like he’s the nice, sensitive guy, but really he is so full of himself. Joey on the other hand is portrayed as a womanizer but is actually super sweet and I love him

Archie from Riverdale… I have only seen the first 1.5 seasons ish but he is the worst…. we’re supposed to believe he’s some easygoing musically gifted football player but instead he manages to pull off being bland as heck and actually kind of a terrible garbage person

Nick from chilling adventures of Sabrina. I hate characters that are like hitting on the main character even though she has a bf and are like dark and broody and sexy blah blah blah…. I liked Harvey way better. I never finished season 2 tho

Emma Swan from Once Upon a Time? Idk she was fine she just got old after a while

If you could rewrite a story or part of a book, what would it be and what would you do differently?

HM. First, Harry would name his son Remus Rebeus Potter LOL. Ok but real talk there was a headcanon floating around forever ago that Harry should have become a professor at Hogwarts instead of an auror and I am 100% on board

Ok, ok….. what abouuuttt…… OK, is star wars when Han and Leia get together. I like them as a couple, but the entire first half of the movie Han is being such an ass. And when they kiss the first time, he’s being SOOO creepy. It’s like so quintessentially 80s romance. and HERE’S THE THING. They actually filmed (or maybe just wrote?) a version of that scene that WASNT CREEPY. And i’m like WHY DIDNT YOU USE THAT?!? So I like to pretend that’s the version that actually happened.

This part is way harder than the shipping portion. If I think of anything else i’l dm you. I HOPE YOU ENJOY READING THIS NOVEL LENGTH POST OF ME RAMBLING ABOUT MY FIXATIONS OVER THE LAST 10 YEARS. If anyone actually read this far, you deserve a cup of hot chocolate and a blanket

[courage-a-word-of-justice]

ACCA 2 | Nanbaka 16 | SGRS 16 | Marginal #4 2 | Classicaloid 15 | Blue Exorcist: Kyoto Saga 2 - 3 | D Gray Man Hallow 1 | ReLIFE 2 - 6

The idea for D Gray Man Hallow from now on: Once all 2016 shows are done (rewatches or not), expect the 2016 ranking.

(ACCA 2)

What in Dante’s Inferno? I’m properly listening to the OP as it was intended in the anime…and it doesn’t quite look like what I expected.

I don’t like tomatoes, so no bread for me.

This is a cute…albeit unconventional way to introduce the series’ core concepts. Also, acorn berets.

Kabocha = pumpkin, while murasaki = purple. That’s made from purple lettuce, so I don’t blame ‘em for calling it that.

Mushroomhead = Rail.

I thought ACCA paid really high if he got cigarettes for free.

Oh no, is Nino going to go against Jean?

Bihinshitsu = equipment room.

2m 22 cm is over 6 foot…wow.

Walnut-topped cake filled with nuts.

The systems managers seem really incompetent…I suspect something’s up.

The guys all deilberately seem to have the same face.

A-hah. As I thought. (Dang you, title spoiler.)

If this ED were to evolve, it would be even better than Yuri on Ice’s OP. (That’s saying something.) Unfortunately, that doesn’t seem to be happening…

Doesn’t seem like there’ll be any title spoilers next time either.

(Nanbaka 16)

I’m less likely to skip Rin! Rin! Hi! Hi! than some of the other Ops when I’m watching. That does make it slightly unwieldy as a rewatching show, though.

“Wow, he’s trash.” – Dat me.

Samon has a brother?

In a world full of filial piety, the worst one can do is to insult someone else’s family.

I’m not very good with “kept secret” stories, which is why I’m trying to do “Next to Me” well enough…at least to my standards, anyway. My standards are very high, you know.

They must’ve done something to the snacks…

(Showa Genroku: Sukeroku Futatabi-hen 3)

The fireworks are so lifelike in this ep!

Daiku Shirabe…I found out about the story from an ANN article, so I should’ve seen its appearance coming…“Tamaya” is something you yell during fireworks displays. Apparently it was the name of a fireworks company somewhere along the line.

The flattening refers to how Yota had to bow for forgiveness, but I think I kinda explained that already.

“Shinuchissei”…Yota seems to slur the end of his sentences.

I actually went “WHAT?!” at Yota not being fazed by the big daddy boss.

Note for later: The baby (I heard his name was Shinnosuke) was born November 23rd.

The jazz soundtrack really sells this show.

...so this is the rant from Daiku Shirabe. It’s fast (compared to even the usual), but it has lots of heart. Plus the showcasing of the tattoo really did its significance justice.

I think the bridge is called Matsubashi (Pine Bridge).

Yota could’ve fabricated the shaking of his hands.…wow. Yota has such yaoi hands. Just what you’d expect from a former BL artist.

I thought Yakumo was more of a cat person. Whose dog is Hanako?

Aw. I felt sorry for Matsuda, even if I have a suspicion he feigned those tears. Well, regardless, now I know Matsuda has grandkids anyway…so win win.

I knew he was either summoning the master Sukeroku II pissed off or Sukeroku himself.

“Tou-chan” was an unexpected nickname I didn’t think Konatsu would use.

Update: I thought about it, and even Shinnosuke’s name takes after the legacy. Remember? Sukeroku used to be called Shin! 

(Marginal #4 2)

One of the things that makes this show stand out is the space-styled episode titles.

Ooh. Pretty cherry blossoms.

Pan shots. Of course.

I know this isn’t the sort of show that gets too much coverage, and I even think it looks a bit ugly at times (not to mention a bit weird) but when you’re not caught up on most of the other big idol shows, this is the best you can do.

I think game boy (orange twin…er, aka R)’s trying too hard with his terms.

Now that Atom is talking about heart, it really does look like he’s a Toshiki Masuda character through and through, although he doesn’t look very angry when he sounds angry. I’ll chalk that up to the art department.

“Don’t think, feel” seems to be attributed to lots of places, so I don’t know the original source. However, since game boy (um, aka R) cites a movie star, it’s apparently Bruce Lee (if my Google-fu serves me right).

L makes stuff sound deeeeep.

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?! Rui wasn’t surprised by the juice.

Atom is such a Ryuu sometimes...

…okay, enough with the underwear jokes…The twin jokes are a bit weird. Plus the ships can be smelt from a mile away…but that’s not enough to save a show.

“Ore-sama”? I only just realised Atom uses such a term.

Enough about the lucky underwear! *flips table*

Oh, I saw Ayanokouji in the background at one point.

I’m with Rui most times, including the need for deduction.

I’m still questioning the sanity of someone who wrote an entire episode plot about lucky underwear.

Alright, since I feel brain dead after that, I’m going to drop it, meaning ACCA is the show that forges ahead. Well, I’m lucky I was hoping to watch FLCL to fill in the gap once I’m done with my 3 remaining rewatches at this point in time (ReLIFE, D Gray Man, Morose Mononokean). The latter two will have, from ep 7, fresh impressions, so hopefully you can look forward to them.  

(Classicaloid 15)

Selfies: a worldwide phenomenon…I never got into that stuff, but if I were to analyse ‘em, I’d say they tap into the human need to be self centred.

There’s something sad about seeing someone rejected, eve if that someone is a piece of trash like Sousuke…

The game the Classicaloids are playing appears to be a game of Life.

Unfortunately, Kanae’s right…again. Sad life for you, Sousuke.

Motz literally became a flippin’ Akoya, right down to wearing a dress. Plus, the Amazon brigade came back.

Aw, I really felt for the glasses guy, even if briefly.

“Basics of Programming”? Don’t need that for Garage Band, Sousuke.

Hanted house and cosplay café...

…eh? Tchaiko still calls herself a former member of Cla:Kla?

Oh. I never realised until now, but Hamamatsu + festival (matsuri) = Hamamatsuri.

With that song (Sousuke’s song), it’s a sad blooper reel.

(Blue Exorcist: Kyoto Saga ep 2)

I got a wallpaper of Shima trying not to laugh (it was from the official Blue Exorcist anime page, but only for a period around Shima’s b’day). So this ep is where it comes from.

“Bon” means “young master” anyway, so it doesn’t matter.

“…a herbal tea antidote…”

Kyoto is meant to be the imperial capital…at least around the 1700s, it was the imperial capital.

Mamushi means “pit viper”. She’s not one to mess with.

He’s got some reflexes, that Ryuji.

Uwabami is also a type of snake…I forgot which one though.

Wait, Uwabami’s the man?! Uwabami was a woman in Oumagadoki Zoo…

Seriously, are they all getting drunk on juice…? Oh, okay. So that’s what happened.

(ep 3)

Rin’s shirt says “Sankyu” in goroawase and English, LOL.

Even if you love weeds, please don’t smoke ‘em, kids.

I thought Rin was going to pull a Shaft head tilt out of nowhere when he looked back at Konekomaru.

Update: For efficiency, the tag for this one is “Chesarka watches AoEx”. However, I don’t normally refer to it as such. I’d probably refer to it as “Ao Eku” if I wee speaking (due to the season 1 DVD extras), but “Blue Exorcist” is the shortest mode of the name I’d use in typing format.

(D Gray Man Hallow ep 1)

I am familiar with this source material, so do be aware of that. However, I didn’t finish the anime the first time around, so do be aware of that too.

Sometimes the art style for this anime can be a little off. The noses can be a little too pointy and too close to the eyes, so on and so forth.Allen doesn’t even look like he’s blushing with this art style too…that’s a bit of a disappointment.

Even the golems have it in for each other…LOL.

Johnny has apparently been stealing the spotlight for quite some time, but I haven’t noticed it all that much. Probably because I read volumes 21 – 24 in one go…

I think.Cross Marian looks more like Grelle (Black Butler) than ever in colour.

Why does Lenalee have such a short skirt?

When even the masked guy has a sweatdrop, you know there’s trouble.

(ReLIFE ep 2)

Unfortunately for Kariu, I understand there is no “next time”…

I’ve found out even at 18, people don’t judge two people of different gender sitting together eating lunch…of course, cultural standards notwithstanding.

Stud earrings are fine if you play sports, I think.

According to Google-sensei, it’s only about $11, my country’s money. It’s not that much if you work…but knowing Japanese standards (which say you should focus on getting into uni before getting a job), it does seem a bit much for someone who doesn’t work and doesn’t get any allowance. So in a weird way, it does make sense to me.

...but you took Kariu’s hand when she offered you the rubber, Arata?

Hey, that joke was in Erased too.

Kazu-kun = Karamatsu…kinda. LOL.

I always seemed to understand Hishiron, and yet also understand Arata to some extent too. Maybe I’m the perfect in-between for these two. Probably because I tend to break off friendships as soon as the year ends, and yet prior friendships are a core part to my social strategy.

Unfortuately, the downside to “minimalistic” is that it’s obvious when it goes off model.

LINE sticker…LOL. LINE’s very popular in Japan.

(ep 3)

I’ve wondered whether Yayoi Sou is a lady or not. Considering the circumstances, it probably is that Sensei is a female.

Hideyo is the dude on the 1000 note, obviously.

Ah…fitness tests. The bane of youth. No one says “stupid loud” though.

Oh. Tamarai’s there around the time of Asaji’s throw.

Lookit that rabbit on Usa-sensei’s shirt. No one says “crazy athletic” either…you outdated subbers.

Akira (Inukai) is kinda like Yurio, come to think of it, eh?

Didn’t you just say it yourself (about you being old) though, Arata?

Yoake literally had a blank face there, LOL.

There appears to be a Sato GP on the way to Aoba. Huh.

Ah…a show’s a real classic if it makes you laugh every time…

(ep 4)

Where’s the guy who does sad interpretations of OPs and EDs? (This guy.)

I know your feels, Kariu. (see the Tumblr debacle for an instance of this)

There appears to be something about whales near the fishtank.

The cityscapes in this are so nice.

There’s a map of Japan on one wall of Kaizaki’s place.

Go forth, young Kariu! Pick up your fallen balls! (teehee)

CGI balls, LOL.

It’s creepy (but also dramatic) when the lights of the eyes are the last to move.

(ep 5)

Sumire! Her name means “violet” (the flower).

There are some nuances lost in translation, like yappari and the levels of formality…but those are typically lost.

This “lecture” is probably the highest point you can get in the show (so far). It’s times like this you can really see an author’s strengths in storytelling.

The piano really sells the Hishiro/Kaizaki meeting.

What a strange angle that “lean to the left” shot is.

I’ve found out swear words have a lot of leeway when it comes to levels of “oh no”. These swar words include yabai and temee. Due to the context of Wan! and the fact it was Chuuya who kept using them, I went with the nastier variants [in my scanlating days] but sometimes a non-swearing variant is enough. However, kirai (to dislike) is pretty nasty if you use it in Japanese.

Kaizaki’s delivery of these lines really sells their comedic effect. The electronic keyboard makes it sound like night, but also makes it sound 1) like night and 2) creepy, for some reason.

Freeter is almost as bad as NEET, Kaizaki.

There appears to be a 100 man (10 thousand) coin bank behind Yoake, which makes that...1000000 yen. (chorus in back: One million yen?!)

(ep 6)

Apparently someone tried to type the same Japanese words into Google and didn’t get the same results, LOL.

Hishiron uses a Mac, LOL.

“Thanks for having us” probably isn’t the right words for it. Ojamashimasu means “sorry for intruding”, but it sounds heavily formal when translated, so I can see why the subbers did what they did though.

*laughs* MDs (minidiscs)? I know what they are, even though they’re meant to be completely dead by now. Apparently they’re a product of the 90s that never caught on..although I admit I’ve never used an MD in my life, let alone held one. It does kinda look like a floppy disc, though. (chorus in back: You poke through old stuff too much, don’t you?)

Those fadeout cups are so cool! I want one.

Ah, maths. The sad thing about my life is that up until a certain point I was good at maths. Then the hard stuff came up and I started to fail.

I thought it was Third Street Oga was talking about, but it’s 3rd chome, sort of like a suburb.

Knowing An, she may have deliberately put Oga out of the way for her own purposes…if you know what I mean.

CGI car just ruined the suspenseful mood, dangit.

Sometimes I just turn off my volume and turn on some music on Spotify. That way, you can make your own soundtrack.

Why did Arata have such a dumb face in the thought bubble?

Wow, she’s a real fujoshi, that one [An].

“Dude”? I cringe so much at her use of it, despite the fact I use it myself. 

You liar, Onoya. Knowing who subject 1 was means that I know they couldn’t have even thought about that part…

[veganearlybird]

Entrepreneur. Maverick. Genius. [The Diaries of Harold Gordon]

(October 5)

With nearly 22 years now in past have decided to buy moleskine (paper iPad) from online store (free shipping included. good deal). Have always thought of myself as a creative type the likes of Jerry Seinfeld or Tyler Perry, it is good that now I have capability to write down thoughts and dreams and tech-startup ideas here. I was told that when you have an object out of sight, you’re out of your mind, so this moleskine should be good reminder to write down thoughts so they don’t fly away like airplane and I can make successful iPad app. As matter of fact, I do indeed have one or three billion-dollar ideas up my sleeves that will now write in moleskine. First Billion-Dollar Idea: new app game like Angry Birds except birds are mice. Working title: “Where’s the dang cheese?” If you are a snooper and reading my idea journal thinking to steal cheese idea from me, nice try, but I have patent pending, am not scared to sue in court of law.

The other Billion-dollar app idea tells when your pants zipper is down, it’s easy and simple, why wasn’t it made earlier (it’s a common problem I’m sure Steve Jobs wanted to fix too)? All the gizmos to make app work already invented by other people, am simply making new use for them, probably will make one billion (or at least one million dollars). App is called pantsApp (thought of name in bathtub). So how it works is you buy my sensor tag and attach it to zipper handle on pants. It talks to your iPhone or android phone (not literally, idiot. It’s via Bluetooth) and sets off alarm when pants are down – that’s it! (You can customize alarm, but by default it is set to the voice of a dad yelling at you and telling you you aren’t good enough and why didn’t you go to college and when are you going to move out and why do I never see you bring any girls around are you gay or something).

All you simple minds with no moleskine probably had my pantsApp idea at some point in your lives too but didn’t have a dang place to write down. In six months, will be on sailing boat in San Francisco bay with Strawberry Daquiri (on work day, mind you) counting my suitcases of venture-capital money. On same day, your sorry ass will be pounding on computer, not even knowing your doldrums of normal work life, you won’t know how pathetic/sad it is that you DO NOT have Daiquiri (on work day, mind you). Do not mean to insult, creatives like myself and Tyler Perry don’t have time to be polite or follow sheep rules like you. Can’t hear you on other side of money mountain (my pile of venture-capital money) ;) With new life ahead, all on my mind is new lifestyle. With venture money, will go to expensive streetwear stores in LA and buy hundred dollar shirts. Adding rolex is necessary for completing lifestyle.

When I die in future, this journal exists to show creativity for generations to come, captures soul of genius mind in leather moleskine. Hope that people are sad when I die, like Steve Jobs or Phillip Seymour Hoffman, hope that I am alive for necessary recognition, don’t want to only be famous when dead. “Bring me roses so I can smell them.”

<3, Harold Gordon. I’ll write again soon, don’t worry about it.

- - -

(October 7)

Have been thinking more of legacy I will leave on world after thinking about competitors to my genius on the planet. Am wondering if I am not being as ambitious as I can be, given that my (genius) brain is the biggest there is. After much thought, I have decided only living rival (maybe dead and alive) is Elon Musk. He is from South Africa if you don’t know who he is – no black face though, I am surprised from pictures. Musk bought expensive car, one million dollars before his twenty ninth birthday. So he is successful, I admit, I will not lie. (I am only twenty one though, so I have time to catch up don’t worry). Musk’s expensive car is called McClaren F1, looks like space ship, only sixty two ever made. One day I will buy faster car, Ferrari Enzo, and call Musk to challenge to drag race some place in the open desert. There, we will see for sure who real man is. We will see who more genius. Who more smart. Who is true master of the business of making money (the type of business I’m in). “I’m no businessman...I’m a business, man...” – Jay Z (hip-hop rapper; has black face unlike Musk)

<3, Harold Gordon

- - -

(October 7 again. It’s night time now though)

Exciting news, I am taking tour of Google headquarters next weekend with one of dad’s friends (Jerry Winslow Lincoln, the guy with three names) and I think it should segway into a productive business meeting for me. I do not know which business idea to focus on when I pitch my idea. Maybe my dreams will give me entirely new idea. One new idea I was thinking of was to build spaceships that bring people to Mars but I found out my rival Elon Musk is already doing that with his own spaceship company. So I think I should go to Saturn (ring planet) instead to steal thunder. Who would give two shits about Musk’s space-rocket if he was only able to get to Mars and I was on ring planet? (No One!) I see New York Times front page headline already: “Hey readers remember when Musk went to dusty ol’ Mars (red planet)? Me neither, who cares, because the genius Harold Gordon inventor went to Saturn and Saturn is five times further away if you didn’t already know.”

If you’re reading you’re probably thinking wow, what makes you always want to one-up everything – even so-called geniuses like Elon – and all I can say is that it’s who I am. Always have been maverick. In Kindergarten my teacher would tell me to sit down in chair but I would say “you don’t understand me, fuck you and your cages.” I got a lot of respect for being salmon- boy in school (going against current, if you don’t understand) and a lot of friends. My friends are in college now like a bunch of dumbasses though. (Lame) I’m sorry for them. They didn’t know who they wanted to be so they had to go away. They need someone else to tell them who they are, like they have amnesia or something. It’s sad. It’s just like when old people with money only wear suits because they don’t have any style (they don’t even know what style is!). They think suits will make them look impressive because that’s what was in a dumb magazine advertisement with some stupid hunk like Leo DiCaprio.

“Fuck you Leo! (Titanic wasn’t even good) Be yourself! Break the rules! Salmon Boys forever” – Harold Gordon (feel free to quote me if you’re reading)

<3, Harold Gordon. Will write again soon.

- - -

(October 12)

Did not write for few days. I’m sorry. I had my tour of Google headquarters in Mountain View with Jerry Winslow Lincoln this morning. I think it went OK. Was kicked out for “harassing” Larry Page but before that was able to put blueprints for Saturn Rocket ship on desk of his secretary and also included my business plans for pantsApp. If he helps me great but I don’t think I need him or care about him any more. Had a revelation during tour when watching Googlers (employees with nerd glasses and no sense of style) that including other people in my plans will probably slow me down in end. Will have to go at it alone but hey the road to other

side of money mountain is really narrow. Other people will just be jealous of me and try to claim my ideas as their own like Winklevoss twins from Social Network movie about Facebook. It good movie.

Am getting tired. Has been inspiring day though. Meeting Larry made me realize how he isn’t so special. Am inspired more than ever to create money businesses and write poems and draw and design and create new universes. It feels like responsibility to world. The sheep don’t deserve me, but they’ll be glad I helped them out when they’re eating Easter Brunch on ring planet.

<3, Harold Gordon

:)

space ship flying in the night

pants are up, always, feeling alright who could deserve this life? i might were it not for harold, life would be strife

:)

[plz write about me when i am dead]