#even tho ur skin is clear af

[sipsteainanxiety]

loving you [3] || katsuki b.

pairing: bakugou katsuki x reader

word count: 2.3k+

mentions: no pronouns mentioned again i think, bit of cuts n blood in this one

part two   part four

You learned that Kirishima liked to read hero tabloids. It was by complete accident that you found out, having stumbled upon him reading one when you went up to his office to ask him for input on a few designs you had for Riot wrist guards. His office was set up in a way that made it super easy to see what he was doing at his desk. He was embarrassed, fumbling with the small booklet as he tried his best to hide it from you, but you saw everything. And you were merciless.

“I didn’t think you kept up with shit like that,” you teased him with a sly smile, walking over to his desk as he sighed and reluctantly brought the tabloid away from behind his back. You went around to stand behind him in his chair, peering over his shoulder at the edition of Pros+ he had with him. The smiling face of Deku greeted you from the front cover, the latest news and gossip about him written on the sidelines. Pro-hero Deku to win award for most saves done in five minutes! From U.A. to Musutafu, how Deku became the most powerful hero yet! Japan’s most eager hero of them all! Freckles: Are they in or are they in?! “Looks like Deku’s doing well.”

“Yeah! He is! I’m super proud of him!” Kirishima told you with a large smile, flipping through the rest of the tabloid so you could both see the different articles about rescue missions Deku’s done within the past year. It was a wonder how it wasn’t as thick as an encyclopedia. His smile turned sheepish as he looked up at you, gazing at you with imploring eyes. “Don’t tell anyone I read this stuff! I just like keeping up with everyone, making sure the media’s not taking the piss out of them. If Bakugou found out he’d probably yell at me for reading ‘Shitty garbage written by shitty people’.” He used his fingers to quote that last bit, doing his best impression of Dynamight. You held back a chuckle.

You mimed zipping your lips shut and throwing away the key. “Hey my lips are sealed man, you can count on me.” He gave you a grateful look and you were once again reminded of the way he was crowned ‘Japan’s sweetest hero’.

From then on, it became a habit for the two of you to whisper and gush over every edition of Pros+ that landed in Kirishima’s hands. You typically did it within the confines of his office, blinds and doors closed to repress any snooping eyes and ears. It was a bit of a guilty pleasure, getting excited over all the accomplishments these top heroes had done and seeing what all their fans were raving about when they weren’t obsessing over various hero victories.

You’d both managed to ooh and aah over editions that focused not only on Deku but Pinky, Galeforce, Lemillion, and Shouto as well. Knowing some of them personally, it was a bit funny to see what the editors of the tabloid were attempting to pull together when it came to gossip—especially when pictures were involved. Kirishima found it just as funny, nearly bursting into tears at one point when the absolutely outlandish question of Does Chargebolt is gay? greeted both your eyes following a picture taken of him and Mindjack at a bar one night. Some people just had too much time on their hands, it seemed.

It was all fun and games for the two of you until Kirishima managed to get his sticky fingers on a Dynamight edition.

“Shut the door, shut the door!” he hissed quickly at you when you’d gone to visit him for your almost daily reading sessions. You looked at him with wide eyes as you closed the door gently behind you, watching as he beckoned you quickly over to his desk. “You wouldn’t believe what I’ve got.”

“What? What is it?” you asked warily as you walked over, eyes searching for the tabloid until you realized he was holding it within his hands, purposely hiding the cover from you. You squinted at him as he made a weird expression you couldn’t for the life of you decipher. Then he showed you the front. You choked. “No fucking way.”

“Yes way!” He finally burst out in laughter and you fully leaned over his shoulder to stare open-mouthedly at the glaring face of Dynamight on the cover of Pros+. Your eyes scanned the headlines that surrounded him. Pro-hero Dynamight named hottest hero of Japan! Skincare routine or no-care routine, how does he do it?! Symbol of Victory or Symbol of Mystery? You decide!

You clamped a hand over your mouth, your wide eyes turning to make contact with Kirishima’s watering ones. When you spoke, your voice was slightly muffled. “Oh my fucking god.”

He started wheezing out some more laughter. “I hope Bakugou doesn’t see this,” he choked out, managing to pull himself together enough to start flipping through the tabloid. Articles of Dynamight’s rescues, his rising popularity, and his no-nonsense attitude waved at you from the pages. Your eyes landed on some pictures of him they’d likely stolen from the Vogue: Heroes Edition shooting he’d done a while ago. It was a fucking thirst tabloid in disguise. “He’d probably burn it on sight.”

You huddled closer to Kirishima, pressed shoulder to shoulder as your eyes darted over all the content displayed for you both to see. The writers must’ve been fans of Dynamight, for they showered him with praise in most of the articles and fawned over his good looks and mysterious persona in others. You and Kirishima read through one of the articles that questioned what skincare products he used.

“God clearly plays favorites,” you suddenly spoke up, eyeing the close-up pictures of Dynamight’s scowling face. There wasn’t a single blemish in sight and the caption beneath it said that the photo hadn’t been edited at all. “His skin is so smooth-looking.”

Kirishima sighed, setting the tabloid down on his desk. “He’s been blessed with good skin for pretty much ever,” he told you, idly scratching at his cheek. “It’s because of his quirk. Glycerin’s really good for your skin, apparently.”

“I’ve heard about that,” you said, looking down once more at the tabloid to see Dynamight glaring up at you from the cover once more. It really wasn’t fair, you thought, that he had the looks to match with the smarts and the athletic prowess he had. He was probably at least self-aware of how hot he was, right? “Of course Dyna—”

“Shh!” Kirishima suddenly sat up straight in his chair, eyes looking at his closed office door. You paused, giving him a confused look, then turned to see what he was so alert about. Your eyes just managed to catch a glimpse of a shadow that passed over the closed blinds of the window leading out to the hallway before the door was slammed open.

You jerked forward, practically throwing yourself on top of Kirishima’s desk to hide the Dynamight edition of Pros+ from sight. You propped your hand under your head, giving a sheepish smile to the very real figure of Dynamight that glowered at you from Kirishima’s doorway. He eyed you for a moment from behind his ripped mask, then looked at Kirishima himself, who was spinning around in his chair, nonchalantly whistling.

“...The fuck?” was his only comment, his gaze hardening the longer he stared at the two of you trying to appear as inconspicuous as possible.

“Hi!” you greeted cheerfully, hoping he couldn’t see the drops of sweat on the side of your face as you prayed your torso was hiding the tabloid from view. You gave his form a once over, a frown slowly sliding onto your face as your eyes landed on the large cut that was leaking blood on his right cheek. You straightened up slightly. “Are you okay? What happened?”

He ignored you. Rude. “Shitty Hair. Your patrol was supposed to start five minutes ago.”

The redhead stopped whistling, his head snapping to glance at the time on his phone before he shot out of his chair. “Crap! On it, my bad! Lost track of time!” He grabbed a few things from his desk, leaning down to whisper “Burn it” into your ear. Then he was out the door, giving Dynamight a pat on the shoulder and bounding his way down to the first floor of the agency.

It was just you and Dynamight now. He was watching you with a look you couldn’t quite place and for a moment you wondered if he was going to question why you were still sprawled on Kirishima’s desk like a French model. But then he huffed, rolling his eyes and stalking his way out, likely to his own office.

You slumped over, your head hanging as you let out a relieved sigh. Standing up, you straightened your clothes and glanced once more at the tabloid. Paper Dynamight glared back at you disapprovingly.

“Fuck you,” you told it with a grimace, snatching it off the desk so you could chuck it in Kirishima’s trash can. This had been too much of a close call. Maybe you and Kirishima should stop reading tabloids so often. Brushing off your hands, you made your way out of the room, closing the door softly behind you before your eyes caught sight of Dynamight’s slightly open office door. You paused for a moment, thinking about the injuries he had on his face. Fuck it. You crept your way over to his door, pushing it open gently so you could stick your head in.

Dynamight’s office was one of the few rooms in the agency you kind of liked. He never had to put the lights on, since the entire left wall of the room was made of glass, allowing natural light to filter in. It gave him the ability to see Musutafu in its near entirety—something you were certain a hero appreciated. He had a lot of bookshelves, novels neatly stacked and ordered in a way only he was privy to. There was a couch and coffee table tucked in the back right corner across from a flat screen television on the backmost wall. There was a singular All Might poster next to it, something that made you smile, just a little, every time you saw it.

Your eyes landed on Dynamight, grumbling as he sat at his desk with a medkit opened in front of him. He glanced up at you when you peered around the door at him, then returned to rummaging around in the kit.

You took that as an invitation to enter, gently closing the door behind you as you walked over to him and stopped right next to his chair. “Villain toss you through a building again?” You were trying to lighten the air a bit.

He huffed, eyes focused on opening a bottle of disinfectant. “He prob’ly wished he had. Fucker had a blade Quirk.” It was then you noticed he had quite a lot of tiny cuts and scratches along his face, neck, and arms. Most were bandaged, but he did have the nasty ones on his cheek still exposed to the air. You watched as he soaked a cotton ball with the disinfectant, then paused as he realized he didn’t have a mirror to see where he was applying it on his face.

You sighed, shuffling closer to him so you could pluck the little ball from his fingers. “C’mere,” you told him gently, one of your hands raising to cup the bottom of his face as you tilted his head up so he could look at you. Surprisingly he let you, his eyes nailed to your expression as you patted his cuts with the cotton ball, making sure to get all of them.

You worked quietly, wiping the blood and dirt from his cheeks. He was silent the entire time as well, not even letting out a sound when his cuts stung from the alcohol. Your tongue poked out from your mouth as you concentrated, grabbing little bandages from the medkit that you could press lightly to his skin.

Like this, in the quiet of his office, you were all too aware of each intake and outtake of breath you made. Every instance where he swallowed, Adam's apple bobbing with the motion, his gaze firmly set on your face. Your fingers felt the softness of his skin, brushed over the curve of his cheeks and edge of his jaw.

And you realized, quite grumpily, that the stupid tabloid really wasn’t exaggerating when it contemplated the clarity and softness of Dynamight’s skin. It was yet another aspect of him that you just hadn’t expected, not really.

As you finished sticking the last bandaid to his chin, you noticed that you couldn’t quite find it in you to let go of his face just yet. The way he was openly observing you made you pause, eyes latched onto those burning vermillion ones of his. You watched him, tracing his cheeks with your fingers. He watched you, bringing his gloved hands up to rest gently on your wrists, holding them with an amount of care you didn’t know if you were capable of understanding. You were locked in a stalemate, neither of you willing to give in.

But you eventually did.

Stepping away, you gathered the tiny pieces of paper from the bandaids and the cotton balls so you could throw them away, letting out a sheepish laugh. “Uh! Well, that’ll do it. I think I got all of them!” You hastily walked over to the small trash can he had, dumping the garbage into it. The back of your neck burned with a heat that was insurmountable. You waved a hand behind you, not finding the strength to look around and see what expression he was making. What emotions lay beyond his eyes. “See ya!”

With that, you were gone, one of your hands clenched near your chest as your other held your burning, burning cheek. If you closed your eyes, you could still feel the way his face felt under your hold, still see the way he looked at you.

You swallowed thickly and walked away, reminiscing about smooth skin and soft cheeks.

[sunshinemellow-fic]

Author-san: PLEASE SPILL YOUR SKINCARE ROUTINE.

omg ok thank u for indulging me im about to write a WHOLE ASS NOVEL

disclaimer: i have exactly 0 actual qualifications to discuss this-- i am not a dermatologist or an esthetician or in any way certified and this is all just my nonsense opinion so please PLEASE feel free to disagree with it or ignore it

at different times in my life my skincare routines have been varying degrees of complicated (hello to the 7 step routines that were v popular a couple years ago) but i have settled on routines that are about 3-4 steps simply bc i realized i would rather invest in a couple gOOd products than try to sustain a larger more complicated routine, but this just personal preference

OK SO MORNING ROUTINE:

1. cleanser (optional) some people just like to use water in the morning which is FINE esp if u have drier skin. I like a gentle milky cleaner to clear off residual skincare from last night + it wakes me up 

2. some kind of antioxidant serum that is good for protecting ur skin from the day/oxidative stress! this is mainly an anti-aging precaution, so feel free to skip if that’s not something u care about v much. lots of people use vitamin C, but i personally like niacinamide for preventing oxidative stress bc it is easier to store since vitamin C can degrade w exposure to air and light and this is a p cheap and nice product whereas vitamin c can get pricier 

3.  SUNBLOCK ok i get it-- lots of people hate wearing sunblock and for v good reason. if u live in the states, lots of the formulations here are goopy, greasy, and leave a white cast which can be very frustrating if u are not white.

HOWEVER!  there are decades and decades of studies proving how dangerous and expensive (with respect to healthcare in the long run) it is to live life without protecting ur skin from UVA and UVB rays, even if you live in an area that is cloudy and overcast, or if it is winter! dousing myself in SPF30 before leaving home feels like puttin on clothes at this point  

i think the best advice i have heard so far is that “the best sunblock is the sunblock you will wear.” it is VERY worth spending the time and effort on trying out different brands and products to find one with a consistency / shade that is comfy and that you can make a habit!

i personally like using a tinted one in place of makeup! i like the brand colorescience, but here are some general sunscreen recs from a dermatologist, some nice drugstore sunscreens, sunscreens that should look decent even if u are not white / the “”””””universal””””” shade that people pretend is all inclusive (i have heard good things about this brand in particular).

this is getting long AF so imma do short NIGHT ROUTINE:

1. cleanse! i like to double cleanse (use an oil-based cleanser, then a water-based cleanser, but this is personal preference; if u like using one cleanser then that works). i like albolene as an oil cleanser because even tho it is very thick and less elegantly formulated than other emulsifying oil cleansers, it is cheap af and it lasts forever and i would rather splurge on sunscreen hehe. i use the same milky cleanser from my morning routine after oil cleansing.  

2. active ingredient! active is a big umbrella term for ingredients that have been proven to solve some kind of “concern” (scare quotes bc nothing is truly a concern-- even aging is a natural part of life that should be embraced, not demonized), and they are typically delivered in concentrated serums. ur concern might anti-aging, managing acne, hyperpigmentation, etc. personally im into anti-aging stuff even tho i am young bean, so i like using retinol, but that is a whole separate convo bc it can be a harsh ingredient that you need to introduce carefully and slowly. other active ingredients might be salicylic acid/BHAs for acne, vitamin C or hydroquinone for hyperpigmentation, etc. 

3. moisturizer! moisturizer seals in ur active so it can do the heavy lifting and replenishes your skin barrier! there are different kinds of moisturizers-- emollient, humectants, occlusive-- and it is worth looking into the different kinds to figure out which works for your skin type! personally after i use retinol my skin can be a little dry and sensitive, so i like using a REAL THICK oily moisturizer. i like to splurge a bit on the drunk elephant one, but there are SO MANY good and well-priced moisturizers. 

this was LONG sorry to clog ur dashes but skincare is a personal passion! also, i think it is v important to do ur own research! if u cannot tell from all the papers i linked, i would much rather dig into science than pay attention to the marketing claims made by someone trying to sell something! following dermatologists on youtube and instagram is a v good way to get advice from experts that you would typically have to pay lots of money for.

gettin off my preaching soap box, sorry im like this, thank u for indulging me hehe

[sea-laviee]

how does graysons skin look so flawless with a pro camera zoomed on his face I don't understand and his freaking eyelashes🥺

he has the PRETTIEST eyes i stg

ur right tho, his skin is clear af smh shouldnt even bother asking what his skincare routine is cus i just know hes gonna say water 😒

[dykereid-moved]

spencer wearing makeup hcs bc i’m depressed and projecting

- spencer likes kbeauty trends with softer paler makeup

- his go to look is a peachy pink diffused eyeshadow that’s super diffused and woodland fairylike bc of all the cute blush n freckles

- he doesn’t wear foundation bc he has naturally clear skin (penelope: give up ur skincare secrets sweet child!!!)

- AND he gets really freckley during the summer even tho it’s really really subtle

- not related but he’s nb n i’m projecting so eh

- spence also likes high fashion editorial looks but he never really tries to recreate them bc he thinks it’s too complicated

- he gets invited to girls night n he helps the girls create makeup looks that he thinks they’ll look good

- he loves doing graphic eyeliner on emily and she looks super hot with it

- derek noticed the lip tint spencer was wearing when they were working on a case (“are u wearing lipstick??” “it’s subtle!!!! n it makes me feel pretty” “i’m not judging baby boy you look good”)

- SPENCE N PENNY GO TO SEPHORA TOGETHER TO HUNT FOR THEIR NEW FAVE PRODUCTS (the employees give them side eyes but do they care? no)

- they always always spend more than they intended to and walk out with two more eyeshadow palettes, a new concealer and somehow a sparkly pen?

- jj tells spence he looks like a fairy and he goes “oh thank u jj 🥺🥰💕💞💓” and she finds it ABSOLUTELY adorable so she tries to compliment him more

- spence kinda uses makeup as a safety blanket? for when he doesn’t really feel right in his own skin and just needs to escape for awhile :(

- it makes him feel like a different person and for once he wouldn’t be dr spencer reid even if it’s just for two hours in his own bedroom at 3am in the morning

- spence loves following tiktok trends so rn he’s loving the heart highlight on his nose and blush contouring (the heart highlight makes derek’s brain short circuit n go 💞💓💕💞💓💕)

- the thing is that spence is really really good at makeup but he just thinks he’s really not that good (“but u are spence!!!! u think anyone who’s not that good can do gothic graphic eyeliner on someone else?!!!”)

- spence only buys from cruelty free n vegan brands bc animals r cute n don’t deserve to suffer

- he also supports a Lot of small businesses, most of his fave products r from small businesses bc he thinks they’re underrated af

- white and coloured eyeliner > plain boring black

- spence expresses all his creativity through his makeup and it results in really awesome sexc makeup looks inspired by random things he finds interesting

- idk spencer reid in makeup can be a concept that is so personal to me

[honeyfreckled]

we have talked a few times and im sorry for this but you are the most accepting and easiest person to talk to honestly i dont have many people in my life i can tell anything real to. but the thing is ive been thinging about relapsing a lot more since i broke up with my boyfriend and i work with him so it makes work depressing and impossible to get through a day without crying sorry this is anon but i am scared ily dont hate me i am not trying to stress you out

ok wow first lemme just say: I DO NOT HATE U. EVER. 

and don’t be srry i don’t have a lotta ppl irl i can tell my shit to so i get it. pls know u can always ALWAYS ALWAYS come to me, and u dont gotta be scared to come off anon. i get it and it’s ok if u prefer it that way- but pls know i dont keep it on alot bc i get hate and then i turn it off bc i gotta look out for myself and dont post all the hate bc i dont wanna bring yall down or give them the satisfaction of knowing i have given it a read and response. so u can message me or make a sideblog or idk im just saying this so if it’s off later u dont blame yrself or feel scared to come off anon. ok sorelapse is a real thing and it’s fucked and hard and addiction is fucked up and a real life struggle and we dont treat addicts w the real tenderness, respect, kindness, and acceptance they deserve. but u DO deserve it. and there are hotlines, apps, churches, groups, chatrooms/boards, and sites that are more versed in what are the appropriate things to say to u- i say this bc while i’ve been thru it w loved ones i have not myself struggled w addiction w substances. my addictions were to self harm and victimhood so those are the things i searched for help on. but if it’s alright i’d like to give u some tips or things i used and have heard work for addicts of substances

places like i said like churches, groups, chatrooms, sites, apps, hotlines the apps and hotlines are good if u cant travel or want to talk to ppl who wont share their story bc maybe u cant hear it like its not the kinda help ur looking for. hotlines are sometimes tricky bc some of those folks are not educated they are volunteers so judgment leaks thru and in that case u ask to be redirected and report that volunteer so hopefully they dont repeat that kinda mess to other vulnerable folks looking for help

make a list of things, anything. list of foods u like to order, list of things that make u clench yr teeth, what were yr fave gifts you’ve ever got, style icons of urs, hobbies u tried that annoyed u, movies u can always watch, places on yr skin u hate being touched, any list of anything it doesnt have to be the usual thing of “what to live for” bc when yr depressed those kinds of things arent easy to think of. but if u get a list going of like “best things ive ever touched” “sounds that make me laugh” “trends that were stupid af” “popular things that i didnt like n couldnt figure out why they were popular” “weirdest ppl ive met” well those things might get u on a roll of good memories or laughing or seeing that theres more to yr life than what has been occupying yr thoughts

dancing. dance in yr room in the dark. clear some space. put on some headphones. lock yr door. do it in the shower. just dance. i had to start w closing my eyes and picking songs that i was taken by emotionally. songs that made me jump and slamdance tbh and then it’s just gotten more and more something im not as ashamed w. i spent a date night w james just dancing and then we ya know ya know bc the dancing got so wild. now i make playlists of songs that set moods for diff kinds of dancing

watch shows w ppl who arent doing better than u. they dont live in fancy places, they dont do much w their lives, they dont dress better than u, they struggle, they arent eating good food u dont have access to. iasip. freaks and geeks. letterkenny. undeclared. jake and amir. tpb. the state. youtube. tiktok/vine comps. lots of these kinds of vibes on youtube

podcasts. improv comedy podcasts tbh saved my life. comedy bang! bang! has best of’s those are good ones to start w. improv4humans bc matt besser has great guests of some of the best improvisers out there and he has musical guests and they’ll play a song and the improvisers will use it as inspo for a scene

make things. moodboards. pinterest. playlists. fill a shopping cart and tell yrself “i’ll get it when i win the lotto and move away from anyone who knows me so i can be the me i wanna be w/out judgement” make tea. make a meal if u can. make yr bed. clean one thing. clean the sink. hang some clothes or go thru yr drawers and clean them out. throwing things out feels hard at first but then it’s nice bc u feel less bogged down

find something to throw yr obsession at for a bit. something that wont hurt u as bad, being obsessed in general isnt good. everything in moderation irl. too much of something is bad just as much as too less of it can be bad. but yr looking for something lower risk here and if u gotta be obsessed w a celeb or a song or a food that’s ok. yr focusing the energy on something that isnt a substance so be proud of it

give yrself a break. give yrself some credit. everyday isnt gonna be on the “best of your name here’s days” but sometimes u just live to live bc that’s what u do. u wait it out and get thru it and wait for the sun to come back out. and if u cant get outta bed. or if you hate yr job and wanna scream- that’s normal it’s more normal than always being happy ppl just dont like talking abt bc society kinda trains us to hide our fucked upness idk why but thats how it is. they dont wanna tell us to do preventative care until we’re in the pits

all in all- it comes down to (at least for me) not planning w an endgoal in mind. it’s not over til it’s over and rlly we dont know. it’s all fluctuating and not meant to be a finish line we cross and then suddenly we’re done and we dont suffer anymore and the feeling of shit is gone or the risk of relapse is gone and the depression is cleared away never to be seen again. it’s not realistic. bc it isnt real. on the real- risk is always there and the downs and ups mix and run together and depression is not curable (this isnt something to be miserable over tho) depression isnt curable, yeah ok, but it is manageable. it can be quieted down from time to time and if u keep up w yr healthy routines and coping mechanisms- depression will still find its way to u bc the real world is not something u can manage. death in the family, loss of money or job, car breaking down, sickness outta nowhere, depression grows wild when these very real life stressors come into our lives. but all that too eventually gets easier and easier at least from a “ok i have some distance now” standpoint. and then as those days get more and more btwn it u can then be like “oh wow, ive made it thru X amount of days! ive put up w it this long! whats one more day, whats one more week, hell might as well see how much prouder i can feel once ive got a year under my belt!” plus u will be more capable of handling the bullshit if u know u can still find some safe places in yr coping skills or friends or resources.

ok so this is prob a mess but bottomline know this:

I love  you and i will be here the best i can should u ever wanna come spill or if u need me to just send u pics of my dog or boring pics of knickknacks or selfies or memes or links or anything just tell me what u need and i will try my best to show u my love. i hope u can see that u reaching out is just already a HUGE major step in the right direction, give yrself credit! thats amazing! yr already doing it pumpkin look at u! it’s hard ik. but i also know if u are capable of saying u have this problem going on, u are capable of getting thru this. u are a light in the world. u offer goodness and u offer yrself and that’s enough. even if yr fucked up right now- u are contributing to the world by simply being u. there is literally NO ONE ELSE WHO IS YOU. so u are unique by definition. i hope u get something from this post and if not i hope it strikes an idea or thing u can do that will help. i hope u know im here and i hope u see this.

i am sending u all my light and love and good vibes and i can’t wait to see or hear from u again. u are never bothering me, a burden, or stressing me out. tbh it stresses me more that u might be struggling and not telling me or anyone. i dont ever want u to suffer in silence bc u feel guilt or scared or anything. u deserve to have a place to voice yr shit. im here to listen if u do wanna tell me anymore.

everyone else-if this helped or if u can think of anything that might help anon or anyone else- feel free to reblog and get some good NONJUDGMENTAL advice or tips and tricks going, but please please please remember to not come off as judgey or flood it with your drama. keep ur drama out of this post so anon or anyone else doesn’t get triggered by it. 

and dont ignore my rule and do it anyway and then say some shit like “ik u said not to but i think this will help lol sorry” like we need this post to stay on this vibe that i set in motion and not a struggle contest or dick measuring or all sad personal reminiscing. go make yr own post for that this is NOT the space.

[jookyun]

💌

@kuromatoki

kuro wow i could go on and on about how amazing u r! first of all, ur super caring and considerate. if i ever feel down, ur one of the first ppl to mssg me and ask if i’m ok. to have that kind of quality in ur personality is such an amazing trait. u also tag me in so many things which i’m so grateful for u always thinking of me! jongup is lucky to lucky to have a stan like u! also ur so pretty! black hair and green eyes 😍😍😍 WTF UR SO PRETTIE.. i know u’ve been going thru a kinda rough time lately but IT’LL BE O K! you will find your people, who love and appreciate u as much as u do them! this valentine’s day, pls do smth for urself! like pain ur nails or do a face mask (even tho u hv clear af skin anyways!) ily tiny bub!! 💞💞💞💞

[chillb1ll]

THE SIGNS BASED OFF PEOPLE I'VE MET

This is all a matter of opinion so don’t come for me, okay? Deal.

Aries 🔥♈️: hot headed af and don’t say that ur not!! admire that y'all have no prob speaking your mind. can be major sweeties at times though.

Taurus 🌎♉️: fierce as hell and you can never tell them anything cause they’re always right. OVERDRAMATIC!!! lowkey crybabies 😂 their love is pure af

Gemini 🌬♊️: LEAVE THEM ALONE. I’ve never met one I haven’t liked. Emotional and overdramatic but loveable and smart af. They peep everything so they’re mad cautious. Forgiving/understanding as hell but they remember every word. always thinking. best 2 for 1 deal 👌🏼

Cancer 💧♋️: ANGELS. Idk why the sudden slander?? they love with their whole being but also will not tolerate being fucked with. smart as hell. and funny af. Smiles/laughs a lot. Their skin is so clear cos they cry about everything.

Leo 🔥♌️: ooze self confidence even tho lowkey you’re insecure. NO CHILL. Honest af. Will hype anybody/anything but mainly themselves. Much love for this sign 💓

Virgo 🌎♍️: it’s 50/50 w y'all, I either love you or hate you. OVERANALYZE IS UR MIDDLE NAME. Big time lovers. Some are sweet as hell too. Always look out for themselves.

Libra 🌬♎️: I LOVE ALL OF U. Honestly one of the most real and honest signs. Best friends to have. Personalities are 🔥 All around dope sign ❤️ Probably the most woke after Aquarius’ ✊🏽✨

Sagittarius 🔥♐️: BORDERLINE CRAZY. ALL OF U. Your chill setting is at a -5. Work ethic is bomb af. Second to Leos on being in love w themselves🙄

Scorpio 💧♏️: the definition of “do no harm but take no shit”. Sarcastic as FUCK but has that soft ass side they show 2% of the population. Will literally murder somebody who hurts or fucks with someone they care about. Loyal as hell. On the low sensitive lil babies.

Capricorn 🌎♑️: Idk many so I can’t rly talk about y'all like that but the one I do know is chill. Likes to play cold/emotionless until they know you. Will do anything for those they care about. Witty.

Aquarius 🌬♒️: lemme not be a basic bitch and say we’re the best but…I mean🤷🏼‍♀️ for the most part cool, annoying at times cos we think we know everything. hates the majority, loves few. Solid ass friend. The stereotype about us loving aliens/always being high is 100% true

Pisces 💧♓️: I CANNOT STAND ANY OF YOU!!! (with one exception) BIGGEST whiners/crybabies!! Everything is your fault bc they’re soft af. BE GONE DEMONS.

[yeobai]

Planning WILD 4hr

Okay so I really like the idea of YJ asking why did you stop? And SY continues. The question is when SY gives in and YJ fucks her senselessly. After SY cums twice. How does on finish YJ off. I kept thinking just how exactly to fuck her lmao. So I can paint the whole picture

i like YJ flipping SY and fucks her senselessly and maybe she’s already close after making SY comes twice? and maybe she gets closer when SY starts begging her

people can also cum from the other end of strap - coz the friction and maybe YJ is the kind who gets off by giving others pleasure aksjakaj

Okay takes intensive notes haha

what do u mean exactly by SY ‘giving in’ btw?

She begs.

ogay so we're on the same page

yea I can see YJ just flipping her - so she's the top now and fucks her senselessly they can cum together

Coming together and cumming  together iconic(edited)

lmao the ideal that can happen - or SY can help her to cum after that

Alright so let the paint the whole picture. I know what happens in middle and the end but how did we get here. Aka I'm in charge you do all the work.

the one in charge is YJ right? power bottom

Mhm

(lmao im still trying to process YJ fully bottomingm, Im-)

Please collect yourself. It was a lot for me to imagine too. maybe there's somekind of power struggle in the beginninng

and SY shoves YJ to the bed

and just climbs her at firsr

when YJ wants to flip her, SY resists

＿＿

Okay starting with a playful vibe...

So picture it, their bed, it's night. SY shoves YJ to the bed. They start kissing and as it escalates flips them and the SY pouts.

Bruh please tell me why my brain wants her to dead ass say, I want to be on top. Haha brain is doing the most

or maybe whe YJ wants to flip them, SY shoves her again to the bed, "Stay there."　 Cause right now nothing would be fucking hotter than her "lightly" grasping her neck and pulling her in for a kiss but I digress sjsgshdkdj

when SY finally gives inn　before YJ flips them

Now so SY climbs on top? Or is she already on top when she tells yj to stay put.

she's already on top I guess?

so she shoves YJ, climb and straddle her (so she's on top now), they make out, and it gets hot YJ wants to flip them but SY resists

So basically I need to set the space where YJ literally decides not to move lmao. I'm trying to connect the stars. Maybe she takes it as a challenge when SY tells her to stay put. But then i feel like it's projecting cause im purposely problematic sksksk

ok but does power bottom also means that she gives her a detailed order 'what to do'

i need to revisit the concept of pwer bottom tbh lmao

Seeeeeee that's the thing ime power btms are talkative af and I just couldn't see it. Lmaoooo

right, maybe we dont assign roles here but just　 focus on the action dem activity maybe we can list down what can happen: - SY riding YJ

I was thinking SY just handcuffs one of her hand to the headboard lmao but that's for another time.　or maybe use her tie lol　 Omg, omｇ　I like it. I like it alot. So SY tells her stay put and she stradding her and she starts particularly undressing YJ and she uses the tie to restrain just one of YJs hands.　This is a mood skskssksk

just one or both bc, ”no touching”

One just in case SY wants to voluntarily use the free hand to touch... herself adagshsjs

like, it doesnt matter if SY use YJ’s hand on herself or on Young Jin , Im into it aksjakaj

Lmaooooo we on the same page

i have that kink when u just guide ur partner’s hand like that akskakaj

Lmaooooo we on the same page

Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 10:45 PM

but its very hot if SY just ‘borrow her hand’ like that

and guide it between her legs

while whispering sth into her ear (im still thinking what lmao)(edited)

anyway what if SY wears lingerie

[

10:52 PM

]

and thats why she keeps YJ down there

[

10:52 PM

]

coz she wants the other woman to enjoy the view

ihyuniYesterday at 10:55 PM

Ah okay SY is already ready for bed when YJ comes home in uniform and SY is wearing something a little special. Okay issa vibe.

Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 10:55 PM

maybe with YJ's coat outside?

[

10:55 PM

]

just to hide her lingerie inside?

[

10:55 PM

]

lmao

[

10:55 PM

]

RIP Young Jin

ihyuniYesterday at 10:55 PM

You and this coat kink lmao

Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 10:55 PM

its a look

[

10:57 PM

]

also - its practical to just, take off the coat for the 'big reveal' lmao

ihyuniYesterday at 10:58 PM

I'm think lingerie but modest aka something like a slip design but very short lol.

[

10:58 PM

]

The first question why are you wearing my coat in bed lmaooooo

Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 10:59 PM

well she waits from the living room

ihyuniYesterday at 11:03 PM

But see if we do that we need connect A (them in the living room) to B (them getting to the bedroom. Let's focus on breaking backs like glow sticks lol

Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:04 PM

akdsjgalkg

[

11:04 PM

]

i thought they can just make out all the way there

[

11:05 PM

]

their place is very simple, its just a few steps from the living room to the bed

ihyuniYesterday at 11:07 PM

Well when you set it up like that it's impossible to say not to want it hahah.

[

11:08 PM

]

Yes I can see this bumping into the wall. Giggling. Okayyyyy

Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:08 PM

yep, cute

[

11:08 PM

]

and when they arrive in the room, SY shove YJ to the bed asap

ihyuniYesterday at 11:10 PM

Forget lingerie what when YJ comes home she's wearing one of her work shirts. Thirst 3636537%

Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:10 PM

yes that too

[

11:10 PM

]

can be both tbh hahahah

[

11:10 PM

]

the white shirt

[

11:10 PM

]

only the white shirt

[

11:10 PM

]

and its kinda too long - so its a look

ihyuniYesterday at 11:11 PM

Lmaoooo or she pulls a wifey and layers but I like only the white shirt

Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:14 PM

lmao

[

11:14 PM

]

i thnk SY would look great wearing YJ's only white shirt tho lmao

ihyuniYesterday at 11:17 PM

I have received the thirst message loud and clear lol.

Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:18 PM

alsfjglajg

[

11:18 PM

]

sry I just have a thing with white shirt lsadjglsadgj

[

11:20 PM

]

ok so

ihyuniYesterday at 11:21 PM

Oh I thought you were stressing that there was nothing underneath asghfxj

Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:21 PM

yea but also the white shirt

[

11:21 PM

]

a sight

ihyuniYesterday at 11:21 PM

Lmaoooooo got it.

Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:23 PM

ok but what happens after SY borrows YJ's hand

[

11:23 PM

]

aslgdj

[

11:24 PM

]

tbh imo guiding ur partner's hand would be hotter if they're blindfolded but this is not the case here aksdjgajg

[

11:24 PM

]

bc SY wants her to see

ihyuniYesterday at 11:29 PM

Um did we reach this place yet lmao. I just remembered her tying the hand. We brainstormed the thirst lmao

Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:29 PM

yep

not yet hahah

yea tie her hand only

ihyuniYesterday at 11:33 PM

Oooh I know you said the white shirt is a vibe but it's even more of a hit when its open so maybe she unbuttons it in a few but we'll insert later.

Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:33 PM

maybe after YJ got tied up bruh

ihyuniYesterday at 11:34 PM

Brain is slowly melting rn so then

Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:34 PM

like after she tie one of YJ's hand

[

11:35 PM

]

(with her tie)

[

11:35 PM

]

SY unbuttons 1-2 buttons

ihyuniYesterday at 11:35 PM

We forgot something important lol.

Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:35 PM

the strap?

[

11:35 PM

]

ksadgkjdsagjadsg

Yes, the freaking strap.

ok so before SY shoves YJ to bed

[

11:37 PM

]

she unbuttons YJ's pants first

[

11:37 PM

]

and puts the strap on her?

ihyuniYesterday at 11:39 PM

We generally fix this error later. Let's skip back down lol

asdlkgalgj

[

11:39 PM

]

honestly if SY just rly want to mess up with YJ, she just tie her up and fuck herself givin a show

Anywho so say she goes the whole 9 yards and pleasures herself while on top of YJ even using YJ'S hand the whole shangbang. After she cums... (???)  [YJ is like untie me right now]

"I'm not done with you."

(ok YJ looks mighty fine on screen and my thirst goes off the chart)(edited)

Then a stride for a magical ride.

ya

SY just tugs the strap

before she positions herself at the right spot and takes it all slowly　 Ｂut I digress so when SY starts to get close and YJ can tell. SY can barely keep her eyes open, maybe YJ reaches over and unties her hand but doesn't act. She's waiting... hmmm

what if SY is into choking and she use YJ's other hand to choke herself lmao while riding her

I'm going to need you to log out for me baby. This is a mess. I can't focus skskshdh

ok but its a sight at least lajgdlakdsjg

It is. Every is a sight cause the white shirt is open,  her hair is probably in her eyes, and the moans are probably nonstop And i am not okay--'

like maybe at first YJ just use her hand to touch YJ around her chest (because the shirt is open) and SY just guide her free hand up and up to her neck, to choke her

The way you're trying to casually slip this in is fucking me up

i mean choking is valid 

maybe SY would start slow, and YJ's hand would just roam around SY's skin - I mean her shirt is just hanging open and YJ just can't resist untl SY puts YJ's hand on her neck like that

"Tell me what to do."

Okay, Ill embrace this. Slowly. Bruh please tell me why my brain just hit that double rated R

(me, zooming on KSH's hands for research now

Im screaming sksgskdvsjd

because choking? asldjglkdsagj

No because earlier she came on YJs hand and my brain was like she put YJ's fingers in her mouth and I have ascended

Maybe SY drags YJ's hand up and up to her mouth so she can taste herself first

We both need to log out jesus

go all out

This is it. The porn of all porns we have composed lmao

but if SY rly wants YJ to watch maybe she sometimes leans back

so u know - its a clear view down therｅ(plus its more torturous for YJ because her free hand can't really reach So Yeon?)　wait maybe she can, asdlkgasglj i cant functioｎ　but anyway she's not close enough to YJ and its torturous enough for YJ lmao

Okay, image noted.

so maybe the choking happens after that lmao

Alright let's progress before I lose what little conscious sense I have left.

Are we still doing the "beg" vibe. After YJ YJ unties her hand when SY is clearly close.

im into it personally

[

12:26 AM

]

if we went with SY "tell me what to do."

[

12:26 AM

]

(while choking)

ihyuniToday at 12:29 AM

Okay, the choking has  a permanent place

Suave-AlpacaToday at 12:29 AM

(what would YJ say)

[

12:29 AM

]

"Fuck me."

[

12:29 AM

]

but is it in character?

[

12:30 AM

]

then SY has the ride of her life

[

12:30 AM

]

(while YJ's choking her)

ihyuniToday at 12:32 AM

Sis wouldn't say fuck me, that's your brain talking.

Suave-AlpacaToday at 12:32 AM

which is why im double asking lmao

[

12:32 AM

]

because that doesnt seem like her character

[

12:32 AM

]

(but its hot so)

[

12:32 AM

]

anyway

[

12:32 AM

]

what would she say

[

12:33 AM

]

what would prompt SY to ride her like there's no tomorrow

[fullsundh]

Ghost! WinWin (AU)

I really enjoyed writing this and liked how it turned out :) hope you enjoy it too!

this whole thing started when you made the decision of picking the cheapest house you could find.

you ended up finding a pretty old yet large house not too far away from your home city.

and at first you was confused as to why such a beautiful house was so cheap compared to others that you had viewed.

when you asked the agent why it was so low in price you was expecting the worst.

like “shit what if it’s secretly broken and it falls down while i’m sleeping?”

or “does this place have rats?!?!”

but then you was told that someone had previously died and you was like

uhm ok????

like it didn’t really bother you

+ you didn’t believe in ghosts bc who has time to bother with that made up stuff??? and you thought it was just foolish to give up such a cheap house bc some people made up stories about it being haunted.

so you bought the house and moved in asap.

and this is where our bby Sicheng comes in,,,

he had obviously seen you when you first came to view the house

and with past people who had viewed the place he secretly stood right behind them

giving them this cold chill down their back and that feeling of someone watching them

that was the main reason why no one had bought the house before you.

buT OUR SHY BABY DIDN’T DO THAT WITH YOU

he took one look at you and was like

oh shit

and kept fAr aWAy

like the boy was so shy about seeing you he had to practically hide

like wyd????? you’re a ghost????? no one can see you anyways??

but he didn’t even think about that

like when he saw you he completely forgot that he was dead

he felt alive again

and somehow a small amount of pink managed to show against his white skin.

skip a few days after you had moved in and he was still somewhat scared of you

like you’d think the human would be scared of the ghost but it was actually the otherway round. 

but slowly our lil angel made his first move

he drew a small heart in the fog on the bathroom mirror while you was in the shower

and honestly winwin really regretted it at first

bc when you first saw in you was SHOOKETH

like holy fuck

how the fuk

hOW?!?!?

so that’s when you started to question the whole ghost deal

you spent like a whole two hours searching up about ghosts and watching all those ghost sightings on YouTube

you even watched a video on how to clear all ghosts and spirits from your home

and sicheng was on the verge of crying 

like he was so scared you already hated him 

but then he saw you ask google how you contact ghosts

and that’s when our shy bean had his first burst of confidence

he took a pencil and wrote you a little note while you was too busy looking at your laptop.

and so you go to write a few tips down in your notepad and freak tf out when you see someone else’s writing

but then you saw what it said and calmed down a lil bit:

“I don’t mean to scare you but if you want to speak to me you don’t have to do some crazy ritual to summon me :) I can show myself if you want, I won’t hurt you.”

at first you was like shit I’m not okay I’m going crazy

but then you thought what the heck and awkwardly said that you wanted them to appear

and oh my god was you shocked

suddenly a really attractive and pale man faded into view

and you instantly had a slight crush on him

then you realised he was dead and started to feel sorry for the stranger in front of you

after like an hour of him promising that there’s nothing to be scared of and that he’s a nice ghost who would never touch or hurt you (even tho you hardly needed convincing bc come on this is Dong Sicheng aka the softest baby man alive)

y’all finally start to get to know each other 

and at first it took a little time getting used to the fact that you was literally talking to a dead person

but after a few weeks of him just randomly appearing to ask you about your day or to help you with work, the whole dead thing became irrelevant

+ sicheng doesn’t really look dead yanno?

like boi is P A L E

but other than that he looks the same as anyone else

except sicheng looks like a damn angel compared to the rest of us

that’s bc he is a damn angel tho

RIGHT! NOW THE PART WHERE YOU TWO BECOME A THING

we all know how shy our bby is so obvi it took him ages to confess

like you were sO close to just confessing before him that’s how damn long it was

but it wasn’t just his shy nature that held him back

baby was scared

he had convinced himself that you’d turn him down due to him being a ghost

or that you’d think it was some plan to like take ur soul or some shit idk

but that isn’t the case

our child just wants love 

aNd YOu GIvE IT tO hIM

THAT SOUNDS BAD I MEAN YOU GIVE HIM LOVE YOU NASTY

winwin confessing would be the cutest thing ever i stg

like don’t touch me im emo

he’d be blushing sososososososo much

ghosts are supposed to be white af

but boi was RED

he’d stumble with his words so much and would lowkey get a lil mad at himself because he had planned a long and cheesy speech but it was quickly forgotten due to the nerves

it’d go like this:

“You’re just....so... cu- wait no, not cute. OH NO WAiT uR CuTE BUT THAT WASN’T THE NEXT WORD.”

*silence + you mentally crying bc he’s so soft*

“PERFECT! THAT’S THE RIGHT WORD”

“......oh no i’ve forgotten the rest of the speech”

AND HE’D LOOK SO SOFT AND CUTE AND CONFUSED AND JUST PERFECT HELP

so you just laughed at how adorable he was being

thEN yOuWeNT AnD KiSSED h I M

and trust me Sicheng was a  m e s s 

for half of the kiss he’d have his eyes open and wouldn’t move

but he’d come back to earth when you was about to pull away and he’d wrap his arms around you to tell you to keep going 

so you two become a couple and it wasn’t really a huge change

i mean you two lived with each other anyways but now it wasn’t like ‘I bought this house and i suppose a ghost was included in the deal’

it was now like ‘I’m living with my boyfriend who just so happens to be dead...oops’

tbh the whole ghost thing did cause a few problems but you loved sicheng and he loved you so you always got past it

dates were a little hard bc you couldn’t really go out with sicheng because from other people’s view you’d just be talking to yourself

so you two would have home dates and dates in empty places like forests and fields

but sicheng would always make them fun and cute so you didn’t care

 ghost or human, sicheng was still himself and you couldn’t help but love him more each day.

[owlpajamas-archived-blog]

yuu dies au

basic summary: “i thought kagami treated me horribly but then i met you lot” -- mika

“no one is happy and mika is the least happy”

the agenda: - make everyone sad - make ourselves sad

nory: heyyy remember yuu dies au bee: r u about to angst on us nory nory: welll i was thinking about it some more bany: Oh Boy

created by moi, @distressedphilosopher​, @forblazes​, and @celestialshinoa​

GIANT HUGE CONTENT WARNING for: suicide, self harm, fucked up mental shit, fucked up coping methods, disordered eating (kinda??), pain and suffering

Setting: during the Final Battle, yuu goes seraph and sacrifices himself to cleanse the entire world. kinda like what he did at nagoya but on a larger scale

yuu was secretly planning smth like this ever since they started planning the final battle (in sanguinem?? tokyo again???) and he was dropping hints leading up to it and being super duper affectionate and emotional towards everyone and spent a lot of time reassuring them all that he loves them so much etc etc. and insisted on mika drinking from him one last time the day they leave bc that means so much to both of them. n at the end of the battle yuu goes seraph and does the thing and there's this huge explosion/burst of incredibly bright light and a huge shockwave and it lasts for several minutes and when the dust clears yuu is lying at the epicenter of a huge crater

and mika gets to him first and the others just hear him scream with grief/pain and they Know. mika is completely incoherent and refuses to leave yuu's body and doesn't let anyone else get close for a while........maybe that's the first time mika tries to kill himself...this is getting a lot darker than i first intended

ok so it's after the battle right and yuu's body is at the morgue and the shinoa squad is back at their house recovering physically and emotionally from everything

like it's their first day back from staying at hospital overnight

and it's morning and mika drags himself out of bed and downstairs and he's dissociating like whoah; and he opens the fridge and the first thing he sees is the several bottles of blood. and it's yuu's blood that they made before the Final Battle; and mika just falls to the floor sobbing bc yuu is gone, he's dead, and yet a part of him is still here?? and feeding mika was always something special for the two of them, it was calm and safe and bonding time

and after mika drinks this yuu will be gone for Real

he's just hit w all this existentialism and reality of the situation

shinoa runs into the kitchen and finds him and he's totally inconsolable

the remnants of the JIDA become the new human government and they let the shinoa squad, including mika, retire early to a house in the countryside for their service.

t starts off w the squad in their new home and it's up in the mountains and it's nice and quiet and there are fields for them to grow their own food and they have a goat or chickens or smth idk but it's empty and they're all grieving

no one really knows what to do w themselves bc not only is yuu dead but they're all retired indefinitely now

kimizuki tries to distract himself w cooking

mika sleeps All The Time like for days at a time bc of vamp metabolism is weird af. so if u add in severe depression and grief u get....sleeping for 3 days straight. also in attempt to get mika out of bed kimizuki ropes him into House Chores™. picture mika and kimizuki at the sink. mika is robotically peeling onions mika and kimi become the food prep team

 he likes feeding the chickens. shinoa takes up crochet. shinoa gave the chickens all stupid names

everyone struggles to cope and mika is actively suicidal and the squad tries to bring him out of it

mika loses his appetite from grief/depression and refuses to drink for a week+ at a time and gets really weak and sick. it's ironic bc all this time drinking blood has been the thing he hates most about being a vampire but he kept doing it so that he could save yuu/live with yuu. and now yuu's dead and he doesn't even care about blood at all. like under any other circumstances this would be a GOOD thing to not be thirsty but.

it's a struggle to get him to drink anything bc the old solution of "confront him and cut ur arm or show him blood and then he'll give in and drink" doesn't work anymore bc mika just Doesn't Fucking Care.

someone just ends up jamming their arm into his fangs and he hates it but his instincts are screaming at him to eat, eat, survive even if his mind and heart don't want to

like once he starts drinking his body is like Oh Shit wait this is a really good thing u need this to survive

and then theres panic among the person who jammed their arm into his teeth because oh fuck his jaw locked (as vampires do when feeding sometimes. this was completely on accident on mikas part tho)

at one point yoichi is trying to convince him to drink and is getting really really worried bc mika is in a Bad Place and so he kind of yells at mika “yuu would want you to!!” or smth like that. and mika snaps and starts yelling at him and is Really Angry in a scary vampire way. like he just whirls around and yells at yoichi to shut the fuck up, you don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about, he slams his fist into the wall, he’s baring his fangs and his eyes have this dangerous glint. and yoichi starts crying bc he’s just so scared and worried for mika, and he’s also grieving yuu so much, and he can’t help but be scared when mika acts like that

and then mika feels even worse!! >: D

yoichi is sobbing and mika doesn’t kno what to Do he’s so confused and disoriented and he feels so awful and it’s a Mess. the rest of the squad comes running in and intervenes cuz they heard the yelling

bany: also u know how cats will purr when either happy OR distressed as a self-comfort mechanism?yeah. that happens. its not a happy purr sound. its miserable and throaty and stuttered.

yoichi is crying and saying “i’m sorry i’m sorry” and “i miss him too!!” and kimi and shinoa are trying to comfort him and mika is floundering and sad-purring

bany: mika just. gives up and curls into a ball. just him and the squad and the vibrations in his throat

kimi drags yoichi away, who doesn’t want to leave until mika’s ok, and shinoa and narumi stay and try to talk to mika. he caves and drinks from narumi and then falls asleep for like a day and a half after that. depression symptoms become more exaggerated when ur a vampire bc their metabolism is slower. mika becomes the master of the depression nap.

hey hey what if he and yoichi cuddle after the fight as an apology. mika falls asleep and yoichi starts petting his hair and mika starts purring, then yoichi falls asleep too. yoichi Insists that mika drink from him, or at least drink /something/ bc mika’s had no appetite for weeks and is p much starving himself

bany: he feeds so infrequently and in such small portions the squad starts to notice signs of continual starvation (his cheeks are hollow, his spine should not be that pronounced, holy shit ribs) and say okay this has GOT to STOP

permanent dark circles under his eyes and shaky hands, dizzy spells All the time, his skin was always pale but now it’s paler than normal and all the color is washed out or greyed out

bany: vampires have slow heartbeats right? it should not be as fast as it is

nice thing about living w a group of powerful demon users/human experiments is that they all have a pretty good healing factor so they can lose a lot more blood and be fine than a normal human could

after yuu’s death and things settle down a little and the squad resigns from the JIDA and live in a house together in a small town thats being built again. theres a grave and shrine where yuu is buried, its in the woods a little,  and thats where mika spends most of his time. shinoa helped him plant perenials to plant on the gravesite. mika spends most of his time dissociating and remembering and talking to yuu outloud. about how much mika misses yuu and how desperately he wants to be with him, mika cant bear the thought of existing in a world where yuu no longer exits, and that hes so sorry that he could save yuu and that he wants to join yuu in death but he cant bc its impossible. and hes so lonely and he feels like something has been ripped out of him, bc yuu was mika’s life parter and fp.

he tells yuu about all the stuff that happens everyday too, and he also cries a lot. he tells yuu about how his appetite is gone and how ironic it is that something he wanted so bad to happen (to not want to drink blood) was caused by his worst nightmare (yuu’s death)

Melissa: Mika realizes how much he actually appreciated drinking Yuu's blood n stuff and how much he hates that he has no other options now

The squad keep a little schedule without mika knowing and they go and visit him and let him feed from them (or rather, make him)

He doesn't fight back as much as he used to because he just doesn't care about anything

Nory: he reaches a point where he doesnt cry or anything anymore but the only emotion he has is overwhelming grief and self loathing. he talks about how grateful he was that yuu accepted him so enthusiastically and whole-heartedly and always looked out for him even when mika made it difficult; and how much he misses drinking from yuu and how comforting and safe it was because he loved yuu so much and they had so much trust in each other. the first time he drinks directly from one of the squad members he breaks down and is flooded w memories of yuu

also he gets really really furious at the other squad members bc they arent feeling the grief as powerfully as he does. like they still are absolutely grieving for yuu but they start to recover and move through the stages of grief and mika cant

Melissa: Mika thinks it's because humans are fickle and care less and he gets mad at them for being so "shallow"

he takes his grief and angery out on them and yells at them and gets into fights, yelling how they couldnt posssibly understand what hes feeling right now, how dare you, how dare you start to move on….etc..

During one of his angry spurts he just runs into a forest and starts knocking down trees

Nory: someone tries to comfort him and he curls in on himself and hes termbling and sad-purring. kimi tries to stop hm and mika whirls around and snarls “dont touch me” and he looks really feral and its a little scary.

Melissa: He does the neck grab attack thing on someone then looks down on them as tears fall from his face into theirs then he gets off and turns his back toward them and just says "...I'm sorry" then flies away

Nory: he doesnt come back for a day or 2 and he comes back really exhausted and dissociating and bleeding a lot

Melissa: he stabs himself a lot (cue nory sobbing)

he hasnt had any blood in over a weak and he just makes it to the front porch before he faints, his injuries arent healing bc hes so weak. And everyone is like "how do we feed him if he's unconscious???" he wakes up a little when they get him inside and immediately throws up from internal bleeding. (I LOVE SUFFERING)

And they just like try to stop his bleeding enough to get him to be conscious enough not to choke on it.

he drinks from kimizuki then bc his body is running on autopilot at this point and hes to tired to fight the impulses anymore, and after he gets enough in his system he watches his wounds start to heal and he's like "damn it" and is mad and embarrassed w himself later for causing a scene and being an inconvenience.

he was also so drained and out of it he wasnt even thinking about dying he was just in pain and his instincts took over completely

he was dissociating and he didnt even remember going back to the house or fainting, he just wakes up in his bed not knowing what happened or where he is

after a while mika starts sleeping in yoichis room bc its comforting and it lets him forget about anything and just pretend hes a normal teenager

Sleep deprived angst talks are the best kind

yoichi + mika have late night talk sessions that usually involve at least 1 of the crying

mika comforting yoichi tho?? good shit……..in a very quite, subdued way, lots of hugs involved, purring, crying. they finally fall asleep at like 3 am and dont get up till past noon. mika is clinging to yoichi like an octopus.

Mika: holds yoichi

Yoichi: is held

yoi always wakes up earlier than mika but he stays in bed and falls into a doze and hugs mika instead of getting up

bc its so nice to have companionship and also he knows that mika will get really anxious if he wakes up and yoi isnt there

oooooh maybe the first time they sleep in the same bed yoichi gets up in the morning to have breakfast and mika’s still asleep (he needs his rest). and then mika wakes up and panics bc yoichi is gone, and he immediately thinks someting bad happened

mika rushes downstairs bc Gotta FInd YOichi and sees everyone in the kitchen eating breakfast and everythings fine, but he still hugs yoi and checks him over for injuries and doesnt want to let him go. vampire instincts say Gotta Protect Yoichi

and hes like trembling a little bc what if something had happened to yoichi or any of the others??

scenario: mika spends days at a time at yuu's shrine and it's pouring rain and getting to be nighttime so yoichi goes to look for him and he's bleeding from his wrists and not healing bc he hasn't had blood in a week. and yoichi eventually persuades him to come inside. (bany: this kills the man). and basically half carries mika back to the house, and the other squad members are anxiously waiting in the kitchen, mika is basically incoherent but he's just so. miserable. and everyone hurts. he’s dripping blood and cold water and hes a Mess™

yoichi and shinoa get him upstairs and into the bath and mika doesn't even care bc he's just. done.

(also there's mikayoi going on bc i'm lov that shit)

mika says that his life his worthless if yuu is dead and that he's failed his only purpose - to keep yuu safe. and yoichi and shinoa talk about how they need him too bc he's their family now too. and there are nice tender moments with yoichi washing mika's hair

bany: good because his hair would be Nasty and prob needs a good brush

 afterwards mika drinks from yoichi bc he's too exhausted to even protest and they have another Tender Moment™

anyway imagine mika and yoichi hugging each other quietly remembering yuu 

:" )

the squad ovs ends up sleeping in the same room/mattress pile (comfort among others, ect.) but they have like. babysitting mika shifts. they take turns wedging him into the corner of the pile so 1. he can get some fucking sleep and 2. he won't get up and try anything self destructive at tnight.  lot of times he can't even sleep OR he sleeps for days at a time

thats it for now :3 thank u for reading so far and also im sorry

[theblasianbarbie]

Omg help a bitch out what's you're routine??

alright yall!! okay just so yall know i have acne prone sensitive ass skin (also a lil oily) so i break out over everything and like this routine is just specific to my skin and even if ur skin is like mine this routine might not work for you its just my recs and what i use that really worked on my skin!!!

so in the morning its real simple i wear makeup almost everyday and before i started this routine i thought that that and living in NYC was why I was breaking out so much but its not??? lol Also I made a masterpost from websites I buy from for skincare!!

okay so in the mornign i was my face with AROMATICATEA TREE BALANCING FOAMING CLEANSER ($22) 

its pricey af but it WORKS WONDERS I was so scared to use it bc i  thought my skin would purge like it usually does when I switch cleanser but it didnt at all!!! Western cleansers have always failed me and left my skin in worse condition and this brand and everything on this website is Korean and has really improved my skin so quickly!! Also the bottle is pretty big and a little bit goes a long way, so  you do get your moneys worth.  Also you get $10 off if you use my link to buy it from this website. The product is described as:

A gentle foaming cleanser formulated with USDA organic aloe vera and tea tree oil to effectively remove dirt and makeup to leave skin feeling purified, fresh and toned without stripping away natural oils. Burdock and comfrey root extracts provide calm and hydrating effects. Geranium, bitter orange, bergamot essential oil scents add a stress-relieving factor. Ideal for oily skin types.

The aloe helped with the redness and inflammation a lot! like my face feels and looks so different omfg and I dont feel dry after using this like with other cleansers.

I use that cleanser on the MORIHATABINCHOTAN FACIAL PUFF ($15.50) and lightly exfoliate.

Again, pricey but worth it! In the past I used konjac sponges off amazon that worked pretty well but I feel liek this one works a lot better! I dont like using my hands to rub cleansers in and rotating brushes just tore my skin apart and this is perfect it leaves me feeling clean but not like completely stripped. Its amazing at removing make up too (which I will get into later). Also you get $10 off if you use my link to buy it from this website. The product is described as:

An all-natural facial puff made with Binchotan charcoal and Konjac root to very gently exfoliate and cleanse the face for brighter, healthier, radiant skin. Ideal for sensitive skin.

For toner I use BENTON Aloe BHA Skin Toner ($12)

I actually fucking bought this for $20 when its $12 online smh but what made me get this was how it mentioned protection/cleanliness from polluted air. Living in NYC, I’m exposed to that everyday and this really started showing results within days of using it. It’s aloe based which again helped with my redness and inflammation. My dermatologist told me to stay away from things were salclyic acid is the highlighted ingredient--this toner does use it but its not the main thing. Western toners from popular brands that used salicylic acid just left my skin feeling dry and stripped and I’d break out even more bc of them. This toner isnt drying at all!! Its gel like and feels a bit sticky on the skin but once it dries its super moisturizin.  Also you get $10 off if you use my link to buy it from SokoGlam! The product is described as:

Packed with ultra beneficial ingredients such as aloe and salicylic acid, this toner hydrates and preps your skin to help with the absorption of skincare products in the next step in your routine.

Aloe: Soothes, moisturizers.Salicylic Acid: Exfoliates, reduces sebum, and is anti-inflammatory which is great for acneic skin.Snail Mucin: Supports natural cell regeneration and replenishes moisture to increase firmness

For all skin types.

Next, I moisturize. Because I have horrible hyperpigmentation and terrible scars my derm recommended I use sunscreen or moisturizer with sunscreen during the day. So I use Simple Facial Moisturizer, Replenishing Rich ($10) and mix it with Neutrogena Ultra Sheer Dry-Touch Sunscreen Broad Spectrum SPF 100 ($7)

Simple Replenishing Rich Facial Moisturizer instantly doubles your skin's hydration. Simple's moisturizer works for up to 24 hours, leaving your skin feeling silky and nourished all day. Skin-loving ingredients replenish, soothe, and hydrate without the greasy feeling. And the formula doesn't contain any dyes, artificial perfumes, or harsh chemicals that can lead to skin irritation or clogged pores.

• Broad spectrum UVA/UVB protection• Water resistant (80 minutes)• Non-comedogenic (won't clog pores)• Oil free• PABA free

I put these on under my makeup. I like the Simple moisturizer bc like I said I have sensitive skin and its made for ppl with skin like mine and it doesnt feel heavy and I find that products with more natural products work better for me. You can get both of these at Target. 

After I moisturize , I spritz my face with the Mario Badescu Facial Spray with Aloe, Herbs and Rosewater ($12 on Amazon--Hautelook is having a sale on Mario Badescu right now tho!)

This Just makes my skin feel really awake and refreshed. I wait a few minutes to let it sink into my skin then I prime my face and do my makeup. Im a bit extra and use foundation with SPF in it for more protection lol. Product description: 

A refreshing, hydrating mist to use anywhere anytime. Simply formulated with fragrant herbal extracts and rosewater for a pleasant, pick me up for dehydrated, tight and uncomfortable skin.

All of these products have been key to keeping my skin moisturized, prior to using these my skin had dry patches and just didnt feel nice now its way softer and smoother.

NIGHT

OKay nighttime is when it gets REAL

First, to remove my makeup I use Palmers Skin Therapy Cleansing Oil Face ($8 at Target)

OKAY, THIS CLANSIG OIL!!! OMFFFFFG!!!!! LIKE YALLL SHE TAKES EVERYTHING OFF!! AND YALL I WEAR FULL COVERAGE THICK ASS FOUNDATION, CONCEALER, HIGHLIGHT CONTOUR AND LIEK CRAZY COLORFUL EYESHADOW EVERYDAY AND THIS BITCH TAKE EVERYTHING OFF WITH EASE!!!! I’ve tried cleansing oils before but this is the BEST one I have ever tried. I just pump it into my hand and rub it into my face til everything melts off lol. I rinse my face and do like one more pump just in case and rinse again. Like yall....everything COMES OFF. I bet my whole blog. I will delete if yall come to me saying this didnt help take your makeup off. It’s made with Jojoba and Rosehip oil which do wonders for removing makeup. Product description:

Removes Make-Up and Impurities

No Mineral Oil or Parabens

Deep Cleans and Brightens

Rosehip Fragrance

Okay, so after I rinse the oil off I go in with my Makeup Remover Towel (I got mine at Marshalls for $4 but you can probably find one online--it may be more expensive tho)

Okay, tbh the cleansing oil I listed above pretty much removes like up to 95% of the makeup. This cloth is fairly easy to use and honestly a better investment than makeup wipes. Makeup wipes again would leave my skin dry and irritated and only contribute to my breakouts. Even tho it doesnt seem like it, this can remove a lot.  Its easy to use, you just wet it, wring out the excess water and just wipe your face the same way you would with a regular makeup wipe. This removes any traces the cleansing oil didnt pick up (which is usually some mascara and left over eyeliner and some foundation around my neck). Once your done with that you just clean it with regualr soap and water! Like this is gentle on my skin and cleans up all the left overs. 

After that, I go in with my AROMATICATEA TREE BALANCING FOAMING CLEANSER ($22), I use that cleanser on the MORIHATABINCHOTAN FACIAL PUFF ($15.50) and lightly exfoliate which gets rid of any excess traces of makeup, dirt and oil. Then I go in with the toner I listed as well. Sometimes I’ll do a facemask and I dont really have a preference--I’ll link the masterpost I made of the skincare places I shop at and I recommend any masks from them.

Once all thats done, I go in with my [Ost] Original Pure Vitamin C20 Serum ($16 on Amazon....I paid $20 in the store 🙃) 

But yall this stuff really helps. I’m not seeing like results super fast but I’m feeling them and seeing them slowly over time and its only been two weeks so in a few months I’ll probably see more! But if you have dark spots, scars, and hyperpigmentation INCLUDE A VITAMIN C SERUM!!!! Also make sure you keep this one refrigerated or it will go back and stop working. If it is an orange color instead of clear it is bad and is not gonna work. I was originally recommended the Mario Badescu one which people RAVE about but its $45 however, if you wanna indulge Hautelook is having a sale on the brand.  But yeah, the serum not only helps with dark spots but really helped with the texture of my skin. Its a lot softer and more elastic.

OKay, after the serum I add my Curology prescription ($20 for a 90 day supply--your first bottle is free you only have to pay for shipping)

How this website works is, you submit pictures and talk about your skin concerns and you are matched with a certified dermatologist that describes you a medication based on your skin needs! I apply this every night then follow it with my Simple moisturizer and then my Mario Badescu spray. Here is their about:

In their dermatology practices, Dr. David Lortscher and Dr. Nancy Satur saw first-hand just how much our skin can impact our lives. They also observed that while personalized treatments offer the best results, it's difficult for many people to access a dermatologist. So they created Curology. Curology's mission is to treat acne and promote healthy skin with customized skincare prescribed by licensed healthcare providers.

But yeah this is my routine. Its only been 2 weeks but im seeing so many big improvements!!! I hope yall can find a routine that suits you using this as reference!

[fragiilexa]

1-25

Get To Know The Mun!

1. Who is your hero?

this is so hard i have so many, like it depends on like what type of hero bc like, i got one 4 everyhting ok, like I have so many? So many people who mean so much to me like, jesus?!? ( both literally and in exasperation lol ) no but really there are so many but uhm I think If I had to pick a person it would have toooo… it would have to be my Mom. I know that’s cheesy, or something, probably as cheesy as the jesus thing but literally she keeps the house together and she does so much & I don’t think I’ll ever be able to explain to her how much she’s done for me & :/ I just love her. She’s my hero. But, like… I could pick more, I could also easily pick Demi, or Taylor or maybe Stevie Nicks, or fricken Julie Andrews??? Iconic. Hero. Bless. Dolly Parton???? Goals aF. I could go on for hours but those are like the tippy top ones. 

2. If you could live anywhere, where would it be?

Oh well, I mean I really do love Michigan? Like, being able to be by the big lakes is amazing & the views are just?? Incredible. But I think if I had the chance of anywhere without needing to worry about money or the fact I’d be super far from family I’d pick California? or ? I don’t know I just,…. maybe not the ritzy bits of it like it’s a huge state ya’ll have some not so populated places but being close to the ocean & also semi-sort of close to somewhere that is just incredibly alive & fresh would be really cool ( plus bumping into celebs l maO ) I would also say NYC or something but lmao sO much traffic & such little spaces.

3. What is your biggest fear?

lmao uh idk either driving or just people leaving idk 

4. What is your favorite family vacation?

We have only really had one huGE one where we went to Disney World together and it was AMAZING it wasn’t v busy cause we went in their off season and it was literally so fun I’d love to go again tbqh

5. What would you change about yourself if you could?

hmmm I’m tryin’ to love myself more so I feel like I defeat the purpose if I say what I wanna change, but also I’m trying to get healthier this year so maybe just so more strength & also clear skin bc those are what I’m working towards right now.

6. What really makes you angry?

I think what really gets on my nerves is & makes me angry is peoples unwillingness to listen to one another. Like I don’t wanna get political bc i hate ( hate ) politics but like seriously. Treat people as humans. Both sides have wrongs in this and it bothers me that both sides act like they’re ‘holier than thou’ but are both, at times, wrong. No one gets anywhere and we won’t get anywhere if we assume things of one another & also if we don’t stop to realize we are all, in fact, humans who just want to live a happy & healthy life. Unless someone is pointedly a bad person and wants to cause destruction, hate, discourse, ect. then just either try to have a conversation or let it go if there’s none to be had. Being an activist is an amazing thing to do & is mostly always a selfless act but unless you fully accept you’re never actually going to fix everyone & change everyone’s views to your own then you’re just going to be unhappy & bitter for the rest of your life. 

also tumblr callout culture. yall need to get the friCK over yourselves & go like, to church or smthin or at least go to a etiquette class like damn ya’ll make me angry & I’m not??? even an angry person? ?  ? 

( addendum : i hate when people treat others like pos just because they disagree with them it bothers tf out of me. ) 

7. What motivates you to work hard?

Music mostly, it just gives me a good vibe ( depending on the song ) and it just??? It’s like pressing play on a movie or something ‘cause if I have background music ( or not so background music ) then it’s like somethings supposed to be happening so I do more stuff.. but like, I am a super unmotivated person unless I actually have a task that needs to get done, like if it’s a personal motivation to do something it’s ten times harder lmao

8. What is your favorite thing about your career?

since I don’t… really have one I… idk I mean if I made writing a career I guess I’d say my favorite thing is when things click for a muse & you have a lot of muse for writing & it all just pours out & you’re happy.

9. What is your biggest complaint about your job?

I don’t got a job fam…. O.O’’

10. What is your proudest accomplishment?

When I was at camp one little girl in my cabin was just??? adorable??? and she said once when we were talking that I made her want to be a counselor because it looked like fun and it just??? me ??? inspiring a little girl ?? to want to do the funnest job ever??? i was happy. proudest moment. 

11. What is your child’s proudest accomplishment?

m m y  ch il d …. u me an m y cat?? He once swatted at our big dog i was proud of him 4 having the courage tbh.

12. What is your favorite book to read?

I haven’t read a book in forever but I really wanna re-read The Last Song so probably that one.

13. What makes you laugh the most?

Corny jokes. I’m a sucker for em, but also just jokes in general if u can make me laugh u basically have me in the palm of ur hand bc I love laughing but also puppies being clumsy & joe jonas. just fuckijng joe jonas ok he makes me laugh & all he has to do is smile ok.

14. What was the last movie you went to? What did you think?

Uh last movie I went to was Underworld: Blood Wars & It was better than I thought it would b tho it was a little awkward I was sitting next to an old bearded man while a girl got eaten out so that was like, O.O but it was good & I really loved one of the girls in it but I can’t remember her name soBS

15. What did you want to be when you were small?

 a dog ( bless the puppy filter ) no but really I don’t know I never really knew what I wanted to be I switched so much I mean I took ballet classes but failed I took art but I’m still meh, I wanted to be a vet but I can’t deal with the death aspect of it at all. I dunno fam I just wanted to be a dog & live a happy pure life as a pupper.

16. What does your child want to be when he/she grows up?

He want’s to be a lion. Rawr.

17. If you could choose to do anything for a day, what would it be?

Cuddling with Cass all day sounds v legit I’d pick that. ( or disney world again…  but with Cassandra, bc yes. )

18. What is your favorite game or sport to watch and play?

I want to get back into sims *side eyes kae* but also I think u mean just sports so I don’t know… I mean football?? It’s interesting to watch tbh but like I don’t really watch any other sport so it’s football as default.

19. Would you rather ride a bike, ride a horse, or drive a car?

I’d rather have someone drive a car for me ( sobS ) but also I’ve never ridden a horse so that’d be fun to try 

20. What would you sing at Karaoke night?

Uh, some Miley Cyrus / Hannah Montana stuff soBS or.… … ..  Hamilton oH GOD HAMILTON OK Fukc KME UP. H A M I L  T ON .

21. What two radio stations do you listen to in the car the most?

Either 105.3 or 104.5 ‘cause they’re the like, top 100 stations near us? that or we just shuffle all of my dads & moms saved stations which are like, old rock music & like 80′s - 00′s stations which are ok too. 

22. Which would you rather do: wash dishes, mow the lawn, clean the bathroom, or vacuum the house?

I do all of these in one day sobs but shit Vacuum, cleaning the bathroom is like some kind of level 10 hell spaces nothings ever actually clean & it takes forever even tho it’s the smallest room jfc. I wash dishes allthe time tho so I’d want a break & mowing the lawn is legit not that bad it’s just like, mentally I gotta get UP and then once I do I’m chill. It burns calories so im chilli. 

23. If you could hire someone to help you, would it be with cleaning, cooking, or yard work?

Yard work fam. I love cooking by myself ( or well baking… I don’t cook much I just make cookies  lmAO ) but also & cleaning I’m used to doing alone so it’s chill but outside work is just annoying & needs to be over asap.

24. If you could only eat one meal for the rest of your life, what would it be?

this is super hard but my mom’s bbq chicken with red skin potatoes, it’s like the best thing ever, but this is ridiculous like- food is too good to give up. 

25. Who is your favorite author?

Okay I haven’t read anything is sO LONG so I’m not really sure but just on the premise of knowing a lot of his work I’m going to go with C.S. Lewis because I love the way he explains things & I love Narnia.