#even tho i interview pretty well i think i just never have the relevant experience to get the job lol

[guinevereslancelot]

job interview tomorrow 🙏

[gra-sonas]

I didn’t mean to be “silent”, this just took me much longer to write than I had planned. 

First of all, I’d like to point you in the direction of a very good post @adiwriting​ posted a couple of days ago, that sums things up in a very articulate way, you can find it HERE.

~*~

In short: in his most recent interview with the Pretty Little Wine Moms Podcast, Tyler - who’s playing a character who’s half Native American -  revealed, that he did a DNA test with a company called 23AndMe during the filming of season 1 of Roswell, New Mexico, and he test didn’t detect Native American ancestry, even though his grandmother had told him in 2010, that his paternal grandfather Harold's great grandmother was Cherokee Indian.

Below the cut is a transcript of that part of the interview, my opinion on this whole thing, and I answered a couple of asks I got about it. This is a VERY long post.

I’ve already watched the video of the interview, and it shows, that they edited the interview quite heavily. There are several cuts throughout the episode, and some things that can be heard in the audio version, didn’t make it into the video either. 

TRANSCRIPT [I didn’t transcribe every laugh or random words, but I’ve tried my best to make it as accurate as possible]

LESLEY: Did you audition for any of the other roles on PLL?

TYLER: No, Caleb came in halfway through season one. I remember, it was supposed to be a 4-episode stint, a guest starring role. What’s funny though, I lived right by Warner Brothers [studios], so I would drive […] past Warner Brothers and there was a bill board of Pretty Little Liars before it came out and I was like “I could probably be on a show like that.” So, anyway, I auditioned for Caleb, yeah. I never read for… […] No, I didn’t get the role at first because they were like “we really think he needs to be like really ethnic. We need some ethnic diversity. And I was like—

LESLEY: What are you? You’re like “hello”! Part Native American, i mean.

TYLER: Well, no, I’m actually not. I’m actually not, I found out.

HOLLY: Whaaaat? Yes, you are. We did talk about this.

NIA: I thought you were.

HOLLY: We talked about this on set.

TYLER: Do you know when I found out that I wasn’t is when I got Roswell, my character was also supposed to be Native American, half Native American. And I was like “great”, because the pool was like so small. You know, so this is great, you know. I’m shooting season one of the show and do a 23AndMe [DNA test] and I have literally not even 0.1 % Native American.

HOLLY: That can’t be possible.

NIA: No, no, no, no, let me explain how that works. That’s not right.

HOLLY: Nia has some things to tell you.

NIA: The information - I know these things, every nationality in me—

TYLER: Okay, tell me.

NIA: 23AndMe is pulling from— if you do 23AndMe and then you do… what’s the other one—

LESLEY: AncestryCOM

HOLLY: AncestryCOM

NIA: —they’ll come up different. And the reason they’ll come up different from each other is, they’re pulling from the people they already have in their database. So, if there’s not very many Native American people doing 23AndM—

HOLLY: Which there isn’t.

NIA: —it’s not gonna show up.

TYLER: Oh god.

NIA: Yeah.

[INFO: There’s a clear CUT at this point before the interview continues, they even cut Tyler’s “Oh god” you can hear in the audio from the video. So they must’ve talked about this some more before the official version of the interview continues.]

TYLER: Okay, so this is what happened, going back [to being cast as Caleb]. They said “thank you so much for the read” and I really thought I was gonna get it. Because Gayle Pillsbury [PLL casting director] - I’d never even read for her before - and I went in and auditioned, and her response was literally everything you want in an audition. She like lost her fucking mind and was like “where did you come from?”, you know, that sort of thing. I mean, I’m a TERRIBLE auditioner and I get so unbelievably nervous, so for that to be the response—

LESLEY: Wow.

TYLER: So that response… I was like “oh my gosh”. And you even audition and you’re like “I booked it. I booked it!”, you know what I mean? Even though it’s not up to her, you know, but anyway. Then they told me “thank you so much for the read, it was so good, but we want more ethnic diversity”. They came back to me, I don’t know, three weeks later? And they were like “What is your background?” And I was like “I don’t even know.” I called my dad, he tells me “I don’t even know.” He’s like “Call grandma.”. I call my grandma, she tells me her side and then… My dad’s dad passed away before I was born, I don’t know his side of the family at all. So my grandmother talks about his side of the family and says “You know—“ - it was Harold, Harold was my grandfather’s name - —“Harold’s great grandmother was Cherokee Indian. And I was like “Really?” I was like “This is good!”

WINE MOMS,  LAUGHING: “This is good!”

TYLER: So, then I told casting “I’m Native American.” And so they thought it was enough to cast me as, you know, ‘ethnically ambiguous’ or whatever.

[END TRANSCRIPT]

~*~

I’m not an expert on DNA tests. Nia’s comment that tests from different companies come back with different results bc they pull their data from different gene pools makes sense, but I can’t verify whether that's actually the case. Neither do I know whether her claim that 23AndMe pool lacks Native samples for reference is correct.

If it is, it would mean that 23AndMe DNA tests in general wouldn’t be able to detect Native ancestry in any sample. Maybe a test with a different company would come up with a different result, in any case, it would be a very small percentage, given how many generations are between Tyler and his Native ancestor.

The result of the test is only one piece of the puzzle tho, and not the relevant one.

The question isn’t whether the result indicates that what Tyler’s grandma told him is false. The question is, if one Native ancestor 5 generations back and no tribal affiliation of any kind entitle Tyler to play POC characters. 

The answer is a clear no, and yet he’s been cast as non-white characters (and in one case as an explicitly Native character) twice in his life.

That’s unfortunate at best, and ignorant at worst.

~*~

Tyler auditioned for PLL in 2010 when he was 23, turning 24 that year. Initially he didn’t get the role bc they wanted someone “ethnic”. They called him 3 weeks (!) after the initial rejection and asked about his background, and by talking to his grandma, he found out about this Native ancestor.

2010 was a mere decade ago, but it was also a different time. Discussions about diversity and representation on screen, the question whether it’s okay for male actors to play trans women or if shows should pass the Bechdel test were all topics that weren’t discussed as “aggressively (and I mean that in a very positive way, hammer it home that all these things matter!) as they are discussed today, and structures in the TV and movie industry ignored most of it anyway (still do way too often, lbr).

Looking back, it’s easy to condemn what happened as vigorously as we would condemn it if it happened today, but applying today’s standards to 2010 is still a bit unfair. (I’m not saying that what happened is okay, just that back then the level of awareness for it to be wrong wasn’t the same as it is today).

Sure enough ABC execs were all too happy to accept that minimal partial Native ancestry as “enough” to cast him, probably also because Tyler looked “ethnically ambiguous” to them, whatever that means. (Holly also mentioned that they talked about Tyler’s Native ancestry on the set of PLL, and apparently not a single person pointed out that maybe it was a questionable decision...).

Tyler was trying to get his career started back then, and an opportunity like PLL would be any young actor’s dream. When they told him “you’re ethnic enough, you’ve got the job”, he lacked the tools and the awareness to question their decision, neither did anyone ever question Tyler’s decision to accept the role. It was considered to be “okay” by all sides. Which is a systemic problem.

As far as I know, Caleb’s supposed “ethnically diverse” background was never explored on PLL, so they were just happy he looked “ethnic" but never gave a fuck about actual representation. Welcome to the club of most TV shows ever made. Even in 2020, too many shows and movies still try to pull that shit. The difference is, that nowadays they are called out, and people speak up. 

~*~

Fast forward to 2017 when Tyler got the script for Roswell. 7 years of him believing that this partial Native ancestry made him part Native, not half like Alex Manes, but it probably felt like it was “enough” - it had been enough for PLL after all.

He got cast because he’s a great actor, but also because he supposedly had the required ethnic background. This is also on the studio tbh. I assume he was asked about his background and he must’ve told them the same story (since he didn’t have a DNA test he could’ve shown them), and for The CW “one Cherokee Indian ancestor 5 generations back” was also “Native enough”...

~*~

It’s quite a bit of a mess tbh. Fans have been hit rather hard by this revelation, some are angry, some are disappointed, some feel uncomfortable, some probably don’t know whether how they feel is how they should feel after applying all our new-found 2020 ~wisdom and awareness to the situation.

Opinions on the matter differ. Vastly in some cases. Some people feel betrayed, some have “cancelled” Tyler, for others it’s not ideal but also not that big of a deal. It’s a mixed bag, really. 

As for me: 2010 Tyler gets a pass from me. It was a “different time” with different industry rules in place, and ABC’s higher ups, who should’ve known and done better, didn’t. Neither did anyone in casting, nor his management, colleagues, or anyone in his personal life. And he clearly lacked the experience and awareness to question the decision, or himself for accepting it because it never was questioned! Not even in the years following.

2017 Tyler only gets a partial pass. 2017 wasn’t 2020 and too many things were still not all that different from 2010. He’d been on a show for 7 years where this partial Native ancestry was “enough”. Hence he probably felt like auditioning for the role of Alex was okay, and everyone involved in the casting process thought so, too. 

He never pretended to be Native American to get the role, he never pulled a Scarlett Johansson. However... he probably should’ve questioned a bit harder whether a Native ancestor 5 generations back makes him “Native enough” to play a (half) Native character, or any kind of POC character for that matter.

So yeah, definitely putting some blame on him for the lack of awareness, but I’m also side-eying The CW and whoever was involved in the decision making. 

~*~

What I hope for and expect fromTyler now and in the future is, that he won’t ever allow to be cast as any kind of “ethnic” character ever again.

He’s worked hard and has very much earned the career he’s made. He’s an amazing actor, but the circumstances that gave him the opportunity to have that career are based on racist structures in the TV and movie industry, and he directly profited from a system, that cast him - for all we know a white man - as a man of color. Twice.

Imo Tyler’s well aware of these things now. 2020 in particular should’ve been a pretty good eye-opener. It’s good that he has someone like Jeanine to look up to and learn from (not her job to teach him or take him by the hand or anything, but I think she’s a great example of someone who’s already made a name of herself, and uses her influence to help others, and the way she talks about diversity and elevating marginalized voices is very powerful), and I hope that in the future he’ll use is voice and “weight” as an established actor, to elevate minority voices and push for their stories to be included.

Answered your question in part above already.

It’s important to note that there’s a difference between criticizing someone’s actions, and openly hating and/or dissing them. This is a messy situation, and while Tyler can’t change the past, he has to do better in the future. Saying that doesn’t make me (or anyone else) a hater. Tyler’s amazing, but he’s also not perfect. And he doesn’t have to be. No one’s perfect.

When I look back at my life, dear god, I grew up in a very liberal family, we travelled places, I had access to all the books and education, and still. At 23? I was somewhat anti-feminist and a slightly conservative leaning liberal. Not a bad person per se, but also quite ignorant (compared to today’s standards anyway). Thankfully that’s changed over the years. And it keeps changing. Because getting complacent and thinking “I know it all” is BS. I’m working on myself every day, and I’m still prone to fuck up occasionally bc the system is rigged in my favor, and I might not even be aware of it in that moment. 

I’m not cross with Tyler, because I can’t say for certain I hadn’t done the same if the circumstances had been similar. I’m actually quite sure I had done the same, bc society and the industry made it okay. AND NO ONE EVER QUESTIONED IT! He never claimed more for himself than a Native ancestor 5 generations back, and society at large and the TV/movie industry in particular said “that’s fine, you have that ancestry, you can go for diverse roles”. So in part, he fell victim to a system that pretended it was okay.

With MeToo and the Black Lives Matter movement, that “it’s okay” mentality is finally questioned and challenged, and more and more people speak up whenever someone tries to pull this shit. But it still keeps happening and there’s a lot more work to do. 

No one can claim ignorance anymore, though. And he has to do better in the future.

I feel you, nonnie. It’s a messy situation. Imo it’s most unfortunate that this information came out the way it did. In a heavily edited podcast episode with inexperienced (and dare I say “industry-biased”) moderators. We don’t know what else he said or for how long they talked about this.

The podcast hosts were clearly not the most qualified to handle that kind of revelation. There were no follow-up questions, there was no criticism, and the way the interview was edited, the whole thing was treated as a non-issue and “fun” anecdote. Which doesn’t do Tyler any favors tbh. 

But imo it’s also unfair to condemn him solely on what they decided to release. We don’t know what else he said, whether he expressed remorse or whatnot. I don’t know whether his publicist okayed the interview prior to its release. If they did, he should get a new publicist... 

(I’m not implying he should’ve kept it a “secret”, but as a publicist I would’ve made sure this revelation had been handled differently, and Tyler hadn’t been made to look like he was just laughing it off).

I don’t know Tyler personally, but going by everything I’ve seen from him and know about him, I’m certain he won’t take on another POC role. And even if another DNA test should come up with a different result one day, and a certain percentage of Native ancestry would be found, I’d expect him to handle things differently. And imo that’s something he expects from himself, too. He’s a good man. <3

I don’t think he should, but I’m white, so my opinion on this isn’t really relevant. If Native groups would call for him to step down (which I don’t think they would), I’d support it because THEIR opinion on this actually matters.

One option could be that they do a storyline where it’s revealed that the woman Alex believes to be his mother isn’t his biological mom and it turns out he’s not Native - but that’s probably a far stretch, idk.

If he’d give up the role (which he clearly isn’t doing, considering he’s found out during S1 and is about to begin filming S3), I doubt The CW would recast the role with a native actor btw. Alex’d just be written off the show.

What I hope for is, that he’ll join Jeanine in her efforts to push for more Native and Latinx representation and stories on the show (Jeanine talked about that in her recent IG live with congressman Castro, @lambourngb​ made a post about it), and you can watch the entire IG live here.

Fandom’s a large group of many individual people. There are several people who have addressed this and talk about it. And while not every single person in fandom’s talking about it, it’s not swept under the rug either.

And how does this whole thing make Malex fans (another large group of many individual people) look toxic? Malex fans are not a hive mind. I have seen several Malex fans talk about this, and talk about it critically.

I’m sorry that you’re disappointed, nonnie, I’m just not sure what you expected?

[dillydedalus]

what i read in july

THAT’S MORE LIKE IT aka i’m finally out of the (relative) reading slump for good & my bro james joyce was there

men explain things to me, rebecca solnit the original mansplaining essay is great, and still scarily relevant; the others in this collection (most on feminist issues) are also quite good; some aspects are a bit dated & problematic so be aware of that. 2.5/5

erschlagt die armen!, shumona sinha (tr. from french, not available in english) short but very impactful novella about a young french woman, originally from india, who works as an interpreter in the asylum system and becomes more & more broken by this system of inhumane bureaucracy and suffering, until she snaps and hits a migrant over the head with a wine bottle. full of alienation and misery and beautiful but disturbing language - the title translates to ‘beat the poor to death’ so like. yeah. 3.5/5

fire & blood: a history of the targaryen family I, george r r martin look, it’s a 700-page-long fake history book about a fictional ruling dynasty in a fictional world, and i’m just That Obsessed & Desperate about asoiaf (and i don’t even care about the targs That Much). anyway, now i know more about the targs than any ruling family from, you know, real history, which is like, whatever. this is pretty enjoyable if you are That Obsessed, although i will say that some bits are much better than others (there are some dry dull years even in everyone’s fav overly dramatic dragon-riding incest-loving family) and the misogyny really is. a lot. too much. way too much. BUT i did really like Good Best Queen Alysanne (her husband king joe harris is alright too i guess) and i found my new westerosi otp, cregan stark/aly blackwood, who both have Big Dick Energy off the fucking charts. 3.5/5 (+0.5 points for cregan and aly’s combined BDE)

the old drift, namwali serpell hugely ambitious sprawling postcolonial nation-building novel about zambia, told thru three generations of three families, as well as a chorus of mosquitoes (consistently the best & smartest parts). there is A LOT going on, in terms of characters, of plot points, of references to history (the zambian space programme) and literature (finally my knowledge of heart of darkness paid off) and thematically, and honestly it was a bit too much, a bit too tangled & fragmented & drifty, and in the end i probably admire this book more than i liked it, but serpell’s writing is incredibly smart and funny and full of electrical sparks 3.5/5

a severed head, iris murdoch the original love dodecahedron (not that i counted). iris murdoch is fucking WILD and i love her for it. this is a strange darkly funny little farce about some rich well-educated londoners and their bizarre & rather convoluted love lives. not as grandiosely wild as the sea the sea, but fun nevertheless. 3/5

midnight in chernobyl, adam higginbotham jumping on the hype bandwagon caused by the hbo series (very weird to call the current fascination with chernobyl a hype bandwagon but you know). interesting & well-written & accessible (tho the science is still totally beyond me) & gets you to care about the people involved. lots of human failure, lots of human greatness, set against the background of the almost eldritch threat of radioactivity (look up the elephant foot & see if you don’t get chills), and acute radiation syndrome which is THE MOST TERRIFYING THING ON EARTH . 3.5/5

normal people, sally rooney honestly this is incredibly engrossing & absorbing once you get used to how rooney completely ignores ‘show don’t tell’ (it works!), i pretty much read the whole thing in one slow workday (boss makes a dollar, i make a dime so i read books on my phone on company time, also i genuinely had nothing to do). i also think rooney is really good at precisely capturing the ~millenial experience in a way that feels very true, especially the transition from school to uni. BUT i really disliked the ending, the book never engages with the political themes it introduces (esp. class and gender) as deeply as it could and the bdsm stuff never really gets TIED UP LOL. so overall idk: 3.5/5

störfall: nachrichten eines tages, christa wolf quiet reflective undramatic little book narrated by a woman waiting to hear about the outcome of her brother’s brain surgery on the day of the catastrophe at chernobyl - throughout the day she puts down her thoughts about her brother and the events unfolding at chernobyl, as well as the double uncertainty she is trying to cope with. really interesting to read such an immediate reaction to chernobyl (the book came out less than a year after chernobyl). 2.5/5

the man in the high castle, philip k dick it was fine? quick & entertaining alternative history where the axis powers win the war, some interesting bits of worldbuilding (like the draining of the mediterranean which was apparently a real idea in the early 20th century?) but overall it’s just felt a bit disjointed & unsatisfying to me. 2.5/5

fugitive pieces, anne michaels very poetic & thoughtful novel about the holocaust, grief, remembrance & the difference between history and memory, intergenerational trauma, love, geology and the weather. i’m not sure how much this comes together as a novel, but it is absolutely beautifully written (the author is a poet as well) and very affective. 3.5/5

american innovations, rivka galchen short collection of bizarre & often funny short stories about neurotic women whose furniture flies away, or who grow an extra breast, or who are maybe too occupied with financial details. very vague & very precise at once, which seems to be the thing with these sort of collections. 3/5

fool’s assassin (fitz & the fool #1), robin hobb YAASS i’m back in the realm of the elderlings!!! i thought this was one of the weaker installments in the series - i still enjoyed it a lot, and Feelings were had, but it just doesn’t quite fit together pacing-wise & some of the characterisation struck me as off (can i get some nuance for shun & lant please?) and tbh fitz is at peak Selfcentred Dumbass Levels & it drove me up the fucking wall. molly, nettle & bee deserve better. still, completely HYPE for the rest of the trilogy. 3.5/5

JAMES JOYCE JULY

note: i decided not to read dubliners bc it’s my least fav of joyce’s major works & too bleak & repetitive for my mood right now AND while i planned not to reread finnegans wake bc……. it’s finnegans wake…. i kinda do want to read it now (but i also. really don’t.) so idk yet.

a portrait of the artist as a young man, james joyce y’all. i read this book at least once a year between the ages of 15 and 19, it’s beyond formative, it is burnt into my brain, and reading it now several years later it is still everything, soaring and searing (that searing clarity of truth, thanks burgess) and poetic and dirty, and stephen is baby, and a pretentious self-important little prick and i love him & i am him (or was him as only a pretentious self-important teenage girl reading joyce can be him - because this truly is a book that should be read in your late teens when you feel everything as intensely and world-endingly and severely as my boy stephen does and every new experience feels like the world changing). anyway i love this book & i love stephen dedalus, bird-like, hawk-like, knife-blade, aloof, alienated, severe and stern, a poet-priest-prophet if he could ever get over himself, baby baby baby. 5/5

exiles, james joyce well. there’s a reason joyce is known as a novelist. this is….. a failed experiment, maybe. a fairly boring play about an adulterous love-square and uh… love beyond morality and possession maybe??? about how much it would suck for joyce to return to ireland??? and tbh it’s not terribly interesting. 2/5

travesties, tom stoppard a wild funny irreverent & smart antic comedy inspired by the fact that during ww1, james joyce, lenin, and dadaist tristan tzara were all in neutral zurich, more or less simultaneously; they probably never met, but in this play they do, as dadaist poetry, socialist art critique, and a james joyce high on his own genius & in desperate need of some cash while writing ulysses, AND the importance of being earnest (joyce is putting on a production of it) all collide in the memories of henry carr, who played algernon & later sued joyce over money (tru facts). not my fav stoppard (that’s arcadia) but it’s funny & fizzy & smart & combines many many things that i love. 4/5 

ulysses, james joyce look i’m not really going to tell y’all anything new about ulysses, but it really has everything, it’s warm & human(e) & cerebral & difficult & funny & sad & healing & i always get a lot out of it even tho there’s bits (a lot of them) i’ll never wrap my head around. ultimate affirmation of humanity or whatever. also stephen dedalus is baby. 5/5

dedalus, chris mccabe the fact that this book (sequel to ulysses about what stephen dedalus might have done the next day) exists and was published ON MY BIRTHDAY is proof that the universe loves me. 

anyway this is very very good, very very clever, extremely good at stephen (less good at bloom but his parts are still good), engages w/ ulysses, portrait & hamlet (& others) very cleverly & does some cool meta and experimental shit. y’all it has stephen talking to a contemporary therapist about how he’s stuck in joyce’s text which is all about joyce & very little about whoever stephen is when he’s not joyce’s alter ego/affectionate but slightly amused look at younger self and ithaca is an interview w/ the author about how his relationship to his dad influenced his response to ulysses and I’M INTO IT. the oxen of the sun chapter replaces the whole ‘gestation of english prose’ w/ just slightly rewriting the first pages of about 10 novels published between ulysses and now & it does lolita w/ “bloom, thorn of stephen’s sleep, light in his eyes. his sire, his son’ and i lit. screamed. anyway i don’t want to give this 5 stars (yet) bc i think some of the experimental stuff ended up a bit gimmicky & didn’t add that much to the text but fuck. that’s my boy & i want to reread it right now. 4.5/5 ALSO it’s a crime no literary weirdo woman has written ‘a portrait of the artist’s sister’ about delia ‘dilly’ dedalus, shadow of stephen’s mind, quick far & daring, teaching herself french from a 3rd hand primer while her father drinks the nonexistent family fortune away and her older brother is getting drunk on a beach & starting fights w/ soldiers bc he’s a smartarse

[merriemelodie]

1, 16, 17, 28 and 50. :33

End of Year Meme

THANK YOU MY LOVE ALWAYS COMIN IN CLUTCH

[EDIT: This one gets REALLY LONG AND ANGRILY ANECDOTAL, so I put it under a Read More. I APOLOGIZE IN ADVANCE]

Let’s hit it!!!

1.) First things first, did you have a good year?

…Right now, it feels like a pretty resounding “NO,” but that’s just my most recent history clouding the first half of the year or so. The first half was actually pretty great, personally speaking, and it’s laid the foundation for all of the good things that were (and are) to come. So, I guess, if I’m being completely fair, it was a solid “meh,” with both good and bad parts to it.

16.) What food did you try for the first time?

Wow, what a good question! I’m not always the most adventurous when it comes to food, so I’ll have to think about this one. Hm…

Well, I finally tried sweet potato casserole (which my aunt makes, without fail, for every major winter holiday), and HI I THINK I LOVE HER. So, uh, yeah! We’ll go with that!

17.) Did you make any big permanent changes this year?

Well, the first thing that comes to my mind is “I worsened my vocal damage, and done so to the degree that I may not be able to sing well ever again,” SO THERE’S THAT. I’d really like to find something positive, though. I guess it’s hard, because very little (in my perspective, anyway) truly proves itself to be permanent. I made some changes here and there (good and bad), but I don’t know how long they’ll last. I guess this might be a question I’ll be able to fully answer later on down the road.

28.) Did anyone/thing make you so mad it stayed with you for days?

HOOOOOOOOOOOOOH BOY. YES.  YES. VERY RECENTLY, ACTUALLY. BUCKLE IN, KIDS.

So, my family and I decided to spend Christmas at Walt Disney World this year; and, because we can’t let anything pass by without making it just a little bit weird, we decided to invite my mom’s ex-husband to come along, too. (He went with us on our last WDW trip, as well. I had #MixedFeelings about it then, and I had #MixedFeelings about it this time, too.) Here’s the dealy-deal with this guy: he was a MASSIVE DICK when he was married to my mom (to the point where she still has unresolved issues with him, but decides to invite him on a Disney vacation??? LOL SURE OKAY). Like, refused to communicate, conducted a quasi-affair, flat-out told her he didn’t love her, LOTS OF FUN STUFF. So, they divorced a few years back, and that was that. How we came back into each other’s lives a while later is another story, but living on his own for the past few years and whatnot truly did seem to bring about a change of heart in him—one that I welcomed, if only to stop the constant barrage of vitriol that I had to hear about him at home. 

The last WDW trip we took with him didn’t turn out that bad, if only a little uncomfortable for me (because he’s that guy that laughs at people for expressing genuine excitement over something, as opposed to doing so ~ironically~ or just flat-out snarking through everything. I can do both, but I don’t want to if I don’t have to. It just put me in a really weird spot, TBH. THAT’S BESIDES THE POINT THO). So, they went ahead and invited him on this trip, and I was like, “Well, it worked out last trip, and nobody wanted to kill each other, so I guess I can roll with this one.”

Well, as 2017 was wont to do, NOPE.

Here’s the other dealy-deal with this guy. He is a Republican™. Not a republican, a Republican™. We’re talking about a baby-boomer, boot-strap-puller-upper, global-warming-conspiracy-theorist, “PUT-GOD-BACK-IN-OUR-SCHOOLS”-er, wouldn’t-watch-Finding-Dory-because-there-was-a-lesbian-couple-in-it Republican™. The guy likely jerks off to Fox News, and spends the afterglow scrolling through Breitbart. I knew it (because the dude used to drive me places while BLARING Rush Limbaugh and loudly agreeing with everything, and even a14-year-old me with no interest in politics knew BS when I heard it). I had just hoped that, after some time spent apart (and with a heart that had, apparently, been softened in that time), he might choose to apply some of that new-found openmindedness towards other things.

N O P E

So, we’re going to Walt Disney World, right? There’s a show there at the Magic Kingdom called Hall of Presidents, right smack-dab in the middle of Liberty Square. Now, I don’t know if you know this, since there was absolutely no coverage about it at all (😒), but the show had been under refurbishment for a year or so to install A Certain Orange Person, now that That Certain Orange Person, thanks in part to the unaccredited Electoral College, gets to sit in the Oval Office—but now, it’s finally (and very recently) reopened.

Clearly, I don’t have to tell you what my feelings are about the whole thing (because, if you have a pulse, you can read, and you’ve been on my blog for more than 5 minutes, then you likely already know). You know without a doubt whose name was filled in on my ballot last November—or, at the very least, whose wasn’t.

I’m sure you also probably already know, then, exactly whose name was on the ballot of my mom’s ex-husband.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

(I’m suffering.)

Well, fast forward to CHRISTMAS ACTUAL DAY, and the trip’s almost over. Everyone’s getting on each other’s nerves a little bit more, and the pettiest parts of me are DELIGHTED by that (because that likely means I won’t need to continue to put my own discomfort about the guy on the back burner on any future vacations because HE AIN’T GON BE THERE). We’re sitting through CHRISTMAS ACTUAL DINNER; and, after delicately discussing how terrible the Certain Orange Person’s audio-animatronic seemed to look (something we all agreed upon, his “liberal Imagineer sabotage” conspiracy theory aside), I changed the subject and started joking about how I was going to stay in Orlando and submit my application for employment with the Walt Disney Company (which is also not that much a gag, tbh). Jokes about job interviews came up, and I said I’d find a nice pantsuit, and The Ex, inevitably, turns it into a Hillary Clinton joke, comparing me to her. I look him dead in the face, and say, “Welp, I’m choosing to take that as a compliment, since she has such a long, impressive resume.” 

(Like, there are things about Hillary that I very decidedly Do Not Like, but you can’t deny that she was more than qualified to hold the Office of the Presidency, given all the experience she’s had. That is a compliment to me.) 

The Ex looks at me, and goes, “Well, it wasn’t one.”

NICE AND FRIGID. WALKING IN A WINTER WONDERLAND, EVEN.

But I let it go, because this is my vacation, too, dammit, and as much as I’d LOVE to scream about politics (clearly. PLEASE VISIT MY BLOG SOMETIME), I wasn’t gonna crap on what was left of our time there—AND ON CHRISTMAS DAY, NO LESS. We finished the meal, he visited the restroom, I vented to the rest of my family about his political herd mentality and potential moral bankruptcy until he came back, and I promptly shut up once he was in earshot. That, I thought, would be that.

ALAS.

We’re in Liberty Square, we don’t have any place to be, and it’s one of the last times we’re going to be in the Magic Kingdom before we leave. What do we do that we hadn’t yet done?

What else? GO TO THE HALL OF PRESIDENTS.

GOD.

Okay, so, real quick, I’m gonna take this opportunity to give kudos to the Imagineers who worked on that refurb, because they upgraded the projectors/footage to 4K, AND IT WAS STUNNING. My ACTUAL BREATH was TAKEN AWAY. If they were pouring all their work into that, it’s understandable why they didn’t have that much manpower going towards not making 45 look like a dirty sweat sock. (But, again, the Petty Petty Salt Queen in me was also cackling at that, because BEAUTY IS AS BEAUTY DOES BINCH, so I let it ride.)

So, we’re in there, and we get through the really abridged (and surprisingly not too sanitized) montage on American history, which was moving and stuff. After that, we get to some iconic speech excerpts from Presidents past, one of which is Obama’s speech at the Edmund Pettus Bridge to commemorate the 50th anniversary of the Selma to Montgomery marches. This is a speech whose significance cannot be denied, and whose relevance has never been greater. It is inspirational, moving, and certainly one that deserves its place in the history books.

I’ve gotten more liberal with my profanity over the last year or so (and you can probably guess why), but I still very much hesitate to drop the F-bomb. Let that tell you everything, then, about this next phrase—and about my mom’s ex-husband:

During this impassioned, poignant, important speech about race relations, and equity, and perseverance, and the indomitable spirit of humanity, and how justice will prevail, this motherfucker starts booing.

Excuse me?

Look, I get that it’s been a rough fuckin’ year, and that there’s more of a divide between people and their differences than there has been in a while—but most good people have enough decorum and basic human decency to NOT BOO DURING A SPEECH ABOUT THE PROMISE OF THE FUTURE, AND THE DREAMS OF A WORLD THAT PROMISES PEACE AND EQUALITY FOR ALL PEOPLE.

Like, holy fucking shit, guys. I had to sit next to him and watch him boo peace and harmony, just because it came from the mouth of a guy he didn’t like.

The messenger doesn’t change the message. That this asshole let it—and just did something like that without a second thought—horrifies and frightens me to a massive degree. I guess it’s also worse, because I know the guy, and I know he rarely, if ever, has strong opinions of his own. You ask him what he thought about something without having been exposed to a conversation about it first, and he him-haws and stutters so much, you wonder if synapses stopped firing in his brain. He takes his cues (and his beliefs) from others—like Fox News, and the people he surrounds himself with. He pulled that shit in the Hall of Presidents likely because he saw it pulled elsewhere, and went along with it because “that’s what I have to do, because that’s what a true republican does.” (This behavior was A Whole Thing in his marriage to my mother, trust.) 

All I kept thinking at the time was, if this is what he’s willing to do—and all without anybody standing in front of him and giving him actual directives—what else would he do without hesitation, just because he sees others doing it?

That’s a terrifying reality, and one that’s more common than I think we realize sometimes.

If he didn’t like Obama (or if he felt like he shouldn’t like Obama, rather) then he could’ve just stayed silent. It took more energy for him to cup his hands around his rude-ass mouth and FUCKING BOO WORDS ABOUT UNITY AND FREEDOM than to just keep his feelings to himself. It was all the proof I needed that he hadn’t changed at all; or, if he had, it was wholly for the worse. It was the human embodiment of what got Trump in office: racism, hatred, bigotry, incompetence, close-mindedness, and a toxic, xenophobic hive-mind mentality.

I didn’t talk to him for the rest of the trip. (I’m still shaking while writing this.)

50.) What do you wish for yourself?

To find happiness, and give myself permission to keep it.

Thank you, my darling! I hope your 2018 is everything you wished your 2017 could have been. You deserve nothing less than that.

[viikollection]

ɪɴᴛʀᴏ : ᴘᴇʀsᴏɴᴀ / ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ

Welcome!✨ I’m glad you’ve come to my blog and that on top of that you’ve chosen to view this page!

Yes, this is the title of RM’s track in the latest album, MAP OF THE SOUL : PERSONA 🧩 Since the PC layout is music player themed I thought it’d be a cute idea to incorporate the track titles into the ‘last’ and ‘next’ buttons~

Anyway!     This is an about page... About the blog and a little about the author~ I began this blog on 2019.04.12, the day of their album release. The name viikollection has various meanings... 1. I run a blog called @neokollection dedicated to NCT & ‘Kollection’ has sort of become my way of branding things... (I also have @knkollection) 2. There are 7 wonderful members of BTS, what a blessing :’)  In Roman Numerals, it’s VII 💗 3. Finally.......... This is just a coincidence, I swear... My bias is V, thus Vii

This blog has the purpose of serving as an outlet to let me gush over uri boiz share all the daydreams about them I have (in the format of words)!     I do; 1. Scenarios (short drabbles as well as multi-chapter series) 2. Reactions (usually without gifs to be frank) 3. Miscellaneous... I write nearly every genre, including smut. 🖋

Finally, a little about me; I’ll keep it short to parts that are only relevant,,,,,,

I’m on KST, so my days might be your nights- Honestly it sucks because when I post things it seems to be an inconvenient time for most of my followers... So, I’m in Korea, but no- I’ve never seen BTS... Since I’ve been here I’ve prioritized NCT (if you’re an NCTzen come and play on my other blog!) Anyway---- I got into BTS during their Just One Day time and was a pretty active ARMY until around early-ish 2016. I sort of dropped out of being an active ARMY because I no longer was focusing on the boys because the fandom was growing so fast and I began to feel a lot of negative energy and it was really tiring... REGARDLESS, I really love the boys, they hold a special place in my heart and I always keep up with their comebacks and attendance on foreign award shows and/or interviews (peak meme material). But I don’t have a twitter that I actively use, so I mainly keep up with stuff through here and YouTube. OMG I’ve been talking about such boring stuff... Let’s talk about more fun things! My bias is Taehyung, as I said earlier! It used to be J-Hope and I usually waffle between the two- I love how positive and giggly they are- As well as... don’t come for me, but like... their parts in songs are always my favorite. Naturally, it’s easiest for me to write about them. None of the members are hard to write about per say, but I know I write about Yoongi and RM less than other members because I feel they don’t fit the usual concepts I write about- But I’ll try to do better of that! My favorite genres to write about is fluff, more specifically; domestic fluff 💛 It’s natural for me, but I also really enjoy AUs Angst is harder for me maybe because I’m pretty positive honestly and I feel when I write it the emotions don’t carry across right and things jump from point A to B suddenly and the dialogue is awkward... But that’s just my opinion on heavy angst stories. If you a smut connoisseur fret not my guy, I got you- My other blog is like 70% smut-related. * Sort of a side note... I really like experimenting (tho sometimes they fail). I’ve made several ‘choose your own story’ fics, but deleted most of them because I don’t have the patience to see them through to the end. And I do some weird AUs sometimes... I want to write more Horror!AU in the future. And some stories are just kinda short and odd, maybe not even with a S/O but just a member alone. Also also, I write ‘you’ instead of ‘I’ in stories, that irks the shit out of me.

Finally; Made in the USA 🇺🇸 1999 (19 for another month) Uni. Student (so it’s difficult to find time to write)

Anyway, I don’t think I have anything else to add... But I’d love to make mutuals and maybe eventually join a net-

Anyway, I know this blog is pretty empty for now, but if you have any questions ask away~ I take suggestions as well, basically requests, but instead of writing to fill out an order for someone for free, it’s more like ppl suggest things and I take them into account while writing. May or may not fill it out exactly to what you say, or may just incorporate a snippet of it in the story.

Edit;

I’m such a dumbass Call me Finn ☘️