#even if that means i end up in solitude & w barely much recollection of what may transpire. at least when she’s upfront? i dont have to be.

[celestialmancer]

⛈️ //

[sunshinesix]

my idiot.

pairing: jae x oc

genre: a lil bit of angst + fluff

anger flowed through your veins. you were frustrated and fed-up. what does Jae want with me?, you thought. for one moment, he could act as if you meant the world to him; sugarcoated words would leave his lips while his hands would be gently wrapped around your waist, with the tips of his fingers grazing your skin delicately. 

other times, your texts and calls would be unresponded and you would be treated harshly. furthermore he would be avoiding you anyway possible and hinder himself from having any contact with you as if you had the deadliest infection in history. in all honesty, his bipolar actions could only confuse your heart even more. you weren’t sure whether jae would be there, a safety net in his grasp if you were to fall for him and let your feelings flow, or he would let you fall into a blackhole of unrequited love.

you were constantly pacing throughout the apartment, with your thoughts going crazy at the back of your mind. you were the host for tonight’s movie night and had guests that could knock on your door at any moment. however, your mind was filled with Jae and his puzzling antics, which pissed you the hell off.

as soon as the clock struck 9. your doorbell rang. they’re here!!!, you immediately smoothened your flannel pajamas, which was a habit that you had always carried. you grabbed the doorknob and swung the door open. prepared to greet the guests that were patiently waiting for your arrival.

“hi guys!” you waved your hand excitedly at the five boys that filled your doorway. you noticed that each of them had a snack in hand, along with some fluffy pillows and blankets that they were ready to use for the movie night/sleepover. 

“yo, i brought the movie that you requested! Prison School, am I correct?” Brian said, raising the CD that he held in his hand. 

“Wonpil and I brought a bunch of snacks! I think this would be enough for all of us,” Dowoon had all types of chips in his hands, including Doritos and Calbee’s Prawn crackers, which were your ultimate favourite.

“when are you going to let us in? it’s freezing out here,” Sungjin said, which made you grin sheepishly.

“oops, my bad. come in!” you pushed the door and held it at a certain angle, welcoming everyone into your humble residence.

as soon as they entered, they settled themselves down pretty comfortably in their respective seats, with Jae lagging behind them. you were busy locking the door when you felt someone grab your arm. you turned around slightly and took notice of Jae’s slender fingers that were wrapped around your arm. 

“why are you avoiding my texts?” he questioned. his furrowed brows could be seen despite his see-through bangs covering almost half of his face. his face was etched in worry as his eyes lingered on you, trying to figure out the stoic expression you had on. 

“yah, how do you work your CD player of yours?” Brian called out, as his fingers were jabbing all the random buttons that the machine offered, attempting to bring it to life.

“wait, wait. what are you doing?!” you cried, as you walked over to Brian, leaving Jae’s grasp. 

Jae was left behind, gaping and waiting for answers that he hoped to pry out of you. while you were occupied trying to on the CD player, with Brian uselessly by your side, jae decided that maybe then was not the right time to talk about what was going on between the two of you and left the issue to rest.

he joined Sungjin, Wonpil and Dowoon who were sprawled across the blanket that they had laid in the living room in the absence of the huge couch that you usually had. Jae laid his legs out, with his feet covered in reindeer socks that he had worn in spirit of Christmas. 

“atta girl!”  Brian exclaimed excitedly at the sight of the machine coming to life. he walked over to the boys and tucked himself under the covers, snuggling himself right beside Jae who was too engrossed in his thoughts to notice. 

“you should really, get a new CD player,” Wonpil commented, earning hums of agreement from everyone else.

you were the only one sitting on the couch, with pillows surrounding you at every angle.you stretched over to reach the remote control in which you used to press start for the movie, allowing visual moving imagery to fill in the previous black screen. bags of chips were soon ripped open as hands started to dig in, filling itself with chips which were then stuffed into respective mouths. Dowoon tossed your your favourite, and by then the worries of night time weight gain was forgotten as everyone was sinfully enjoying flavoured snacks. laughs echoed throughout the apartment, as the TV depicted comedic actions of the actors. the sight of the handsome Taishi Nakagawa and good looking Kento Yamazaki, who were two among your long list of favourite Japanese actors eased your thoughts, as you were slowly pulled into the world of Prison school; the movie. 

it was midnight, roughly an hour after the movie had ended. in the gap hour, the 6 of you spent time bonding and cracking jokes, which was rare considering that they had their responsibilities as Day6 while you had your own as a working student in university. Wonpil and Dowoon dozed off into dreamland soon after, with the latter’s head on the former’s shoulder.

you knew that Brian was exhausted from school work and song writing and allowed him to crash on your bed, to his joy as he loved the comfort that your expensive mattress provided. Sungjin followed suit and joined brian on your bed. as the urge to sleep knocked each and everyone slowly, you realized that you and Jae were the only ones left wide awake.

Jae tried to make himself seem busy by scrolling through twitter. silence overcame the atmosphere, accompanied by the faint noise that came from the TV and the occasional loud snores. the tension in the air felt too thick, which continued to suffocate you causing you to get on your feet and hastily enter the balcony.

at the balcony, the night sky greeted you as you took a deep breath. it was a chilly night, as winter was approaching. the city night was bustling still, with lights from the buildings down below blinding you. your moment of solitude was interrupted when you heard jae dragging the sliding door, in order to make space for him to step into the balcony. 

“mind if I accompany you?”

“not at all,”

he stepped forward and leaned onto the railing. he looked up to the night sky and noticed how blank it was. “sucks how we can’t really see stars from the city,”

you nodded, and it soon became silent again. you went to the balcony to escape Jae, and considering the situation you were in then, your plan had pretty much failed. the silence was deafening and you felt as if you could hear your thoughts screaming and yelling at you. you chose to exit the balcony instead, causing you to turn on your heels but stopped when you heard Jae call your name.

“can we talk?”

“sure,” you walked over to the wooden bench and sat on it, with your legs dangling and barely touching the floor. you rubbed your hands together, in an effort to spark some heat due to the power of friction.

“are you avoiding me? you weren’t responding to any of my texts or calls.”

“sucks being ignored right?” 

“what do you mean?” Jae questioned. he took a few steps towards you and sat next to you on the same bench.

“what I mean is that it stinks being on the receiving end, doesn’t it?” you paused, trying to recollect your thoughts and calm yourself down. “you’ve been treating me like that for the past weeks. what’s worse is that it is not constant at all. for one moment, you act as if we are dating, showering me with unexpected love and affection. but on other days? you treat me like garbage. your actions confuse me so much, Jae. if you hate me, I rather you treat me like garbage. what do you want from me, Jae? my feelings for you are all over the place,” tears escaped your eyes and trickled down your cheek. your hand was instinctively brought up as it wiped the tears away immediately.

“w-what? I don’t hate you at all!” he placed his head in his hands and let out a dissatisfied groan, which came out muffled. he then started to face you as he grabbed your hands, his black orbs entirely focused on you.

“I like you. I like you so much that I can’t even comprehend it! okay, look. my idiotic self thought that asking for advice from the boys was the best idea. so I did, but they had opposing ideas on what I should do. some thought I should act all lovey-dovey in order to capture your heart, but some thought I better play hard to get. I was so confused on what to do and decided to do both instead,” he said apologetically and rubbed his nape.

“you fool! next time, why don’t you just tell me directly?!” you smacked him hard in the chest, earning a light whimper from him.

“okay, that hurt but I totally deserve that.”

“here’s a tip, you idiot; never take advice regarding girls from your friends ever again,” you cannot help but laugh at his idiotic helpless self. in these kind of situations, you realized that he could be so stupid despite his IQ.

he nodded and grinned sheepishly. “wait, you like me too right?”

“I thought we’ve established that! from my speech earlier on?”

“heh, I just wanted you to say it,”

you turned around, in an attempt to hide your red cheeks. “fine,” you huffed, turning around once again in order to face him. 

“I like you, idiotic Park Jaehyung.”

‘”hey!” he complained. “I was expecting a totally sweet confession from you, but the last part ruined it for me.”

“I only say the truth, Jae.”

he scooted closer and snaked his arm around your waist. he pulled you into his chest and placed his chin atop your head.

“but I am your idiot, and I only speak the truth.”