#esp at the end where she has to watch the only person left that she 'trusts' die and becomes so mindbroken she age regresses basically

[chainreh]

guess who just finished three hopes lol

[guksvault]

HOUSE OF BALLOONS | JJK

05- What You Need

Synopsis: fleeing the pressure and pretense of your elite life, you stumble into the seductive chaos of the House of Balloons. there, Jungkook waits— ready to make you question everything you thought you knew

w/c: 3.7k

warnings: mentions of drugs&alcohol, another HOB party ofc, smut, protected sex (so smart!!), fingering, jjk loves titties ok, lil bit of nipple play, bathroom sex, mirror sex?, again jk <3’s boobies (esp when ur playing w ur own), Valerie mention!! (upcoming chaps will dive further into ReaderxValeries friendship & who she is!)

!minorsdni! // masterlist

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

It had been a full month of attending the House of Balloons’ weekend events.

Every Friday and Saturday night spent within the suffocating, dark, and slightly sinister walls of the House of Balloons. Occasionally, you’d visit during the week—just to hang out with Yoongi—but somehow, you’d always end up watching Gossip Girl on the couch in silence with Jungkook.

It wasn’t that you two had become anything close to friends—far from it, actually. You barely spoke during the episodes, unless Jungkook was calling you a ‘fuckface’ for spoiling the entire plot for him.

You had even started to become somewhat friendly with the rest of their little group. The snarky comments about who you were and where you were from had decreased significantly.

You’d won Joon over when you started bringing him champagne bottles from your mother’s wine cellar for his DIY bottle garden project.

As for Yoongi, it was like no time had passed at all. Picking up right where you left off two years ago, it was clear that nothing—least of all time apart—could change the fact that you and Yoongi were platonic soulmates. You were the same person in different fonts. He loved having you around, loved seeing that side of you—the side he only used to see when the two of you would sneak out of your homes to wreak havoc in shitty arcades.

Hoseok and you, however, hadn’t quite picked up where you’d left off. Though it was tempting, there was a silent agreement between the two of you. If you were going to be a more permanent part of this friendship, crossing boundaries probably wasn’t the wisest move.

Jimin had become your go-to wingman, and you his. More often than not, that meant you’d find someone for him, they’d fall to their knees in awe of his ethereal beauty, and he’d vanish for half the night. Leaving poor you to fend for yourself.

Valerie, though, had become someone you grew particularly close with. Most nights, you’d find yourselves hand in hand, dancing and drinking in front of Hoseok’s booth, sharing drinks, secrets and the occasional peck.

And tonight was no different from the last three Saturdays. You were standing behind the DJ controller on the makeshift stage—really just a table someone had abandoned on their lawn, that Hobi had taken and spray-painted black—in the middle of the crowd.

He was pressed up behind you, his chest against your back and his chin resting on your shoulder. His hands covered yours, guiding your fingers to the right buttons, adjusting the dials with ease. He had convinced you to try DJing tonight, pouting dramatically when you initially refused. How could you have said no to that?

You had absolutely no fucking idea what you were doing, letting Hoseok’s hands do all the work. But you couldn’t help noticing how naturally it all came to him, how in tune he was with his art. You were mesmerised, caught up in the way he commanded the energy of the room.

Across the room, if looks could kill, you’d be a dead, mediocre DJ. Jungkook’s eyes were locked on you, dark and unrelenting, as he watched the way you laughed at Hoseok’s over-the-top hype. How your head would tilt back and rest against Hoseok’s shoulder. How your fingers, slightly intertwined with Hoseok’s, moved together across the board.

He didn’t really understand why he was getting worked up about it. Had no real reason to be. Which only pissed him off more.

Hated how the red lights lining the trim of the ceiling seemed to compliment you. Hated how you were starting to fit in here like you belonged. Hated how he wasn’t entirely sure if he hated you at all.

His jaw tightened as he watched Hoseok lower you off the table, his hands lingering on yours longer than they needed to. And then, he watched you retreat upstairs, your figure disappearing into the shadows, presumably heading to the bathroom.

Before he could stop himself, his feet were moving, following you.

You were just about to slide the small lock on the bathroom door when it was pushed back open, a tattooed hand curling around the edge to force it wider.

“Occupied, freak,” you snapped, trying to push it shut again, only for it to swing open with more force.

Jungkook stepped inside, his heavy-lidded gaze fixed on you, the door clicking shut as he leaned his weight against it. His dark eyes hadn’t left you all month, and tonight was no exception.

“God,” you deadpanned, crossing your arms. “A piss kink and a Gossip Girl fan? Pick a struggle, you sick, deranged germ.”

"Fuck off, D.D. Ain’t got no piss kink," Jungkook shot back, his eyes glued to you. He could see the confusion flicker across your face, which only made his own worse. What the fuck was he even doing?

"Then get out so I can pee?" you quipped, moving past him to stand in front of the mirror.

You adjusted your hair, patting it into place before swiping on a fresh coat of lip gloss— your earlier layer long since transferred to the rim of your solo cup.

"Don't fuck Hobi."

The words tumbled out before Jungkook could stop them, his chest tightening as the weight of what he'd just said settled between you. His jaw flexed, frustration simmering. His head was spinning. Why the fuck did he say that? Why the fuck did he lock himself in a bathroom with you?

You were pissing him off. But more than that, he was pissing himself off.

Your head had snapped towards him, your body frozen in place. Pardon? I beg your finest pardon? Jungkook was staring back at you, his dark eyes locked on your confused ones.

"What the fuck are you talking about Jungkook?"

"Do you want to fuck him?" His hair was falling over his forehead, his hand still holding onto the door knob as he watched you, his eyes flicking over you to gauge any reaction you might have.

Your eyes were searching his face just as desperately for a reason to make any of this conversation make any sense. There was none, Jungkook had no bloody idea what he was doing or why he was doing it. Wasn't leaving without an answer either, was too late to back out now.

“And if I do? I don’t really fucking understand how any of this is any of your business, Jungkook?” you shot back, arms crossed.

“Don’t.”

His voice was low, husky—almost a growl. A warning.

“Don’t wha—”

“Don’t fuck my friends.”

Now it was your turn to do a full performance of mental gymnastics.

What the actual fuck?

You studied him, searching his face for some kind of explanation—maybe he was drunk, or high, or just has lost his mind.

You step closer. His eyes don't leave yours, the tension in his jaw visibly tightening and releasing, like he's trying to stop himself from saying something he shouldn't.

"You shouldn't let jealousy consume you, Jeon Jungkook," you murmur, tilting your head in mock pity. "It's not a good look. Washes you out." You feign a pout, letting your pinky brush some of his fallen hair out of his face.

His sharp inhale sends a shiver down your spine, but you push through, your lips quirking into a teasing smile. "I'll fuck who I please, though."

You reach for the door handle, heart pounding in your chest as the walls feel like they're closing in. Not a fan of small spaces— especially ones that include Jungkook. Not a fan of the way he stares at you like he's deciding whether to destroy you or devour you. Definitely not a fan of the heat pooling between your thighs.

Jungkook has other plans, apparently. His hand wraps around your wrist before it meets the door handle, his eyes still locked on yours—he doesn't want to scare you, doesn't want you leaving just yet either.

You look down at his hand on your wrist and then back at him. The air between you two grows thicker, hotter, suffocating.

It's silent for a moment. His fingers loosen slightly, the angel on his shoulder whispering, Stop. You'll regret this. Don't do it. Bad, bad, bad. Then they tighten again, the devil on the other side sneering, Could be fun. Haven't had your dick wet in a week. Fun, fun, fun.

The devil wins, of course. He listens to it– like he always does. His other hand grabs your waist, pulling you against him. His face is a hair away from yours, eyes glued to your lips, then flicking up to meet your gaze. He sees that your eyes are on his lips, and that's it. He's made up his mind. The devil's always right.

He presses his lips against yours, and a surge of warmth rushes to his skin. You feel your hands find their way to his chest, fingers clutching the fabric of his shirt.

The kiss deepens, messy and frantic, with every passing second. The scent of his detergent, laced with the hint of cigarettes he's been chain-smoking all night, fills your senses. You realise, surprisingly, you prefer it over the bottles of Louis Vuitton and CREED that usually linger during your make-out sessions.

His tongue glides against your lower lip, smoothly, silently asking for entrance. Your lips part, and without hesitation, he pushes inside, eager to become acquainted with your own.

His hand flicks the lock of the door, both of you ignoring the impatient knocks from drunk party-goers outside. His fingers slide down to your lower stomach, guiding you back against the sink. He hooks his hands underneath your thighs, lifting you effortlessly onto it.

You pull away from the kiss, just enough to catch your breath. Your eyes lock with him, and what you see makes your core ache.

Jungkook's hair falls loosely over his forehead, his lips parted and glistening with your kiss, a smudge of your lipstick staining his skin. His eyes are dark-darker than the usual rage he wears when he looks at you. This darkness is different. It's hunger, desire, pure fucking sin.

You grab his forearm, spreading your legs slightly, pulling him in between them. His lips are quick to meet yours again, and he lets out a small grunt into your mouth as your fingers tug at the back of his hair.

His hand slides up your thigh, under the hem of your dress, heading straight for your inner thigh. The air between you both is thick, your breaths coming heavier, fighting for the same breath, the same space, desperate for more.

He takes the subtle spread of your legs as an invitation, his finger slipping under the edge of your panties and lightly dragging down your slit.

Jungkook pulls his lips away from yours, pressing his forehead against yours as his eyes, heavy with desire, lock onto yours through his lashes. "Fuckin' so wet for me, huh?"

You let out a breath you didn't realize you'd been holding, nodding slightly against his forehead. Your hand moves to his wrist, guiding it, encouraging him to explore further.

So, he does as he's told, can follow instructions and rules when he really wants to, and right now? All Jungkook wants is to feel the inside of your walls.

He slides two fingers into your cunt so fucking slowly. Can't fight the groan of satisfaction that escapes his lips as he feels your walls hug his fingers.

He looks at you, see's how your brows are slightly pinched together, your mouth resting ajar. His fingers gain a little pace, pushing in and out of you steadily.

His thumb slides underneath the band of your panties and presses against your clit, rubs small delicate circles as he continues to fill your pussy with his fingers.

His lips find your neck, kissing and biting down your skin. His free hand comes to your chest, grabs the strap over your shoulder and pulls it down, needs your tits in his mouth.

He pulls the fabric thats covering your breasts down, runs his thumb over your hardened nipple, pulls slightly. Pulls again when he hears the soft moan that leaves your lips as he does so. He takes your nipple into his mouth, sucks, kisses, bites. Groans in frustration when your hand meets his jaw to pull his lips back to yours.

His fingers are pumping into you, his thumb pressing harder against your clit, gains a little more speed each time he hears you whine. So fucking pretty.

"Let me fuck you D.D. Let me fuck this cunt." His voice is laced with small pants, "So fuckin' tight. Want you 'round me."

You want to tease him, tell him you probably wouldn't feel it, but when he's begging you like this, you think you might let me do anything he pleases with you.

You simply nod, save your words for another time. Plenty of time to piss Jeon Jungkook off, right now you need his cock stuffed between your legs.

His hands move to the buttons of his pants, lets them fall. The whine that leaves your lips when you see the imprint of his cock against his white briefs only doubles when you see him palm himself over them.

"Get up."

He grabs your waist as you slide off the vanity, moves you in front of the mirror and presses his hand against the middle of your shoulder blades, urging you forward.

Your hands grab the edge of the vanity, he runs his hands up the back of your exposed thighs up to your dress and pushes it over your ass. Groans when he see's the black thong that barely covers you. His hands massages over the flesh of your ass, slides his fingers under the lack of fabric and pulls your panties to the side.

He lets a drop of spit land onto your now exposed cunt, watches it slowly run down your folds, uses his index finger to push it into your cunt.

"Fuck."

He pumps his fingers into you slowly, watches his fingers disappear and reappear. His free hand leans over your back, opens the draw in the vanity and grabs a condom, rips it with his teeth and slides it onto his cock.

He slowly slides his fingers out of your warm cunt, slides his other hand up your spine and wraps his hands into your hair and pulls your head back.

"Watch me fuck you D.D." His eyes meet yours in the reflection, can see your cheeks lightly flushed.

"Can you do that? Huh? Can you watch me fuck you?"

"If you hurry up and fuck me, you'll find out." You speak, your voice a little breathless.

He lines the tip of his cock up to your entrance, slowly rubs it up and down your slit, coats the tip with your slick. Pushes into you slowly, throws his head back as he does.

"Ah-Fuck. So fuckin' tight."

Your lips part, brows pressing together as you feel his thick cock fill you slowly.

He fills you, begins to thrust into you, gains more pace each time he see's you swallow his cock. So fucking warm, so fucking tight. His hands still wrapped around the ends of your hair, he locks his eyes onto yours in the mirror.

He watches the way your back arches slightly, the way your grip tightens on the edge of the vanity each time he bottoms out into you, the way he hopes someone fucking cuts the cords connected to Hoseok's speakers so that everyone can hear the whines leaving your lips.

"Fuck, like that." Your own hand finds your exposed tit, squeezing yourself as Jungkook fucks himself into you.

It only makes Jungkook want to fuck you harder when he sees you playing with your tits, loved tits, loved yours, loved how they moved every time his hips slammed against your ass.

He reaches his arm around your torso, pulls you back against his chest. Almost fucking loses it when you lift your leg up to rest your foot up on the sink. Can see your cunt at a new angle, can see it swallowing his cock.

His movements begin again, his knees bent slightly as he fucks up into you.

"Fuckin' dirty little thing, hm? Touching yourself, showing me your cunt." He speaks into your ear, nibbles at your lobe. His hand that was tangled in your hair is now squeezing your tit over your own hand.

"Fuck, so good. So big." Your other hand drops down to your clit, begins to rub small circles around the now throbbing nub. You watch Jungkook's eyes follow the path of your hand and the whine that echoes into your ear should be illegal. Breathy. Lewd. Desperate.

The pace of his cock only quickens as you do so, "Ah, fuck- Good girl, so fuckin' hot. Gonna make me cum so fuckin' hard".

Your half lidded eyes flutter shut, your head resting back against Jungkook. The feeling of his fat cock pounding into you, the sounds of his breathy moans and sharp grunts with the feeling of your own fingers rubbing your clit almost pushing you to the edge.

Jungkook can tell you’re close, the way your body tenses and the change in your expression gives it away. He’s seen this look before, but this time, there’s something different about it. Softer. The way your lips part, the way your hand pauses every few seconds, controlling the pace. It’s like you’re not trying to force it, not trying to prove anything.

When he realises he's paying too much attention to the way your approaching orgasm is unfolding, he shakes his head, frustrated with himself. His hand grabs your chin roughly, redirecting your gaze to the mirror in front of you.

"Said, watch me fuck you D.D. You been listening so well, don't make me stop just because you can't fuckin' listen"

Your eyes open, your lids heavy as you watch Jungkooks cock slide in and out of you, his other hand grabs your thigh of the leg that's hoisted on the vanity, spreads it wider.

"Gonna cum- Fuck." Your fingers work over your clit, rolling the sensitive bead in circles as your knee's start to lose strength.

"Ah, fuck. Cum. Fuckin' cum for me." Jungkook's thrust are falling out of the rhythm he had been pounding into you at, the look on your face as you begin to cum along with the lewd curses you have mixed in with your whines and the feeling of your walls clenching around him all growing to be too much.

He leans his forehead against your shoulder, fucks himself into you as he begins to fill the condom with his own orgasm.

"Ah, fuck. So fuckin' tight. Should have fucked you raw. Ah, shit."

He keeps his forehead against the back of your shoulder, his eyes closed as his cock twitches inside you as the lasts of his cum shoots out. His hand slides up your front, pulls the neck of your dress back over your tits and gives them one last squeeze.

Your eyes flutter open as you catch your breath, watching in the reflection as Jungkook lifts his head from your shoulder. His gaze meets yours in the mirror, and a quiet “Fuck” escapes his lips.

He savours the feeling of his cock being wrapped so warmly inside you for a few seconds, and then presses his hand back against your upper back and pushes you back bent over. Wants to see your cunt one last time.

He slowly slides out of you, his teeth sinking into his lower lip and he watches your now swollen pussy set his cock free. He presses his index and middle finger together and pushes them inside your over sensitive cunt. You fucking mewl, press your ass back against his fingers. He fucking groans.

He pumps them, once, twice, thrice. Loses count, slides them out when he realises he won't be able to control himself again if he hears your pretty moans one more time. He slides them out, pulls your small thong back over your pussy and lets you stand up.

Its quiet whilst you both get dressed, the only sounds being the water you run to wash your hands or the metal of the small trash bin lid that hits the wall when Jungkook throws his condom away.

You walk towards the door, stopping in front of Jungkook. His hair even messier than it had been, his lips slightly swollen from the kisses he had been pressing into you.

"See. Dirty fuckin' Diana."

You roll your eyes, bring the tips of your fingers to his forehead and push his head back. You reach for the door handle, turning the lock and slipping out, closing the door behind you. Leaving Jungkook alone, facing the mirror where just moments ago, he had you pressed up against.

He doesn’t want to leave. A part of him craves a round two. Maybe even a third.

Knows he can't. Never fucks a girl twice. Wont get to fuck you again, or hear the way you panted his name or begged him to fuck you harder.

He watches himself in the reflection as he washes his hands, splashing cold water onto his face. His thoughts keep drifting back to you—how badly he wants you again, how his body still feels the weight of you. He curses himself through the mirror.

Meanwhile, as you make your way back downstairs, you’re quickly pulled into the arms of a very drunk Valerie. Her breath is heavy with alcohol, and she doesn’t waste any time bombarding you with questions.

“Where the hell have you been?” she slurs, her eyes darting to your makeup. “Why the fuck does it look like you’ve been crying? Did Jungkook do something to you?”

She believes you when you tell her you were just taking a breather in Yoongi’s room, that is, until she notices Jungkook, his own version of an afterglow matching yours perfectly.

“Walk me home?” Her voice is soft, but there’s a cold edge to it, a subtle weight that wasn’t there before. It’s not anger, but something else—disappointment, maybe. You’re not sure. But it’s there, hanging between the two of you.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

[verspia]

Can you do a Angst Arda ff story where he has a bestfriend and a girlfriend but he only hangs out with his bestfriend and the reader starts to feel left out.

And it went on for about 2 months and the reader couldn’t hold it anymore because Arda barely spent time with her at her worst days and she leaves him at the end.

But there’s a plot twist.

She wanted to spend time with him because she was diagnosed with cancer but he obviously couldn’t so she left him with a goodbye letter where she confesses her feelings and he eventually feels guilty and regret.

WITH LOVE, • ARDA GÜLER

( pairing ) arda güler x reader

i actually love this request esp the best friend part because, real.

warnings - character death, maybe slight grammatical errors

Everyone had warned you about the girl best friend, that it was a world wide experience to most, if not all, girlfriends where they would be a third wheel in their own relationship.

You had been warned by everybody, a collection of stereotypes thrown at your way and your only way to refute them was, “well, the boyfriend wasn’t arda.”

You were so confident that Arda would never replace you, would never prioritise anyone else above you and at first, this confidence hadn’t been misplaced.

Arda made you feel like you were the moon in a sky full of stars. You were charmed by him, why wouldn’t you be?

Unfortunately you should’ve listened to your friends when they told you about the three month rule and the inevitable consequence of dating a man who had a girl best friend.

You should’ve listened when they said that a guy is only friends with a girl they find attractive.

You should’ve listened to them, when your dates became group hangouts, where your usual passenger princess seat was designated for Arda’s best friend because Arda had picked her up before he’d come to get you.

You should’ve heeded the warnings when you were left there blinking owlishly while Arda laughed himself off to an inside joke shared with another girl. With the best friend. With a girl that wasn’t you. He was laughing. At an inside joke. Something you couldn’t understand.

You had never felt more lonely, knowing that someone else had discovered the secret parts of Arda, your person, when you had only just began to scratch the surface.

You knew what he liked and what he didn’t, but she knew the stories behind his preferences, was there when he made these decisions. And it hurt, it felt like a knife twisting around your gut, because even though you were the one who held Arda’s hand, even though he was always there, he still managed to feel so far apart. Out of reach for you.

At first, it was easy to brush off the unease. They were best friends, after all, and you knew better than to be jealous. Arda was charming in his own right, with that effortless way of making everyone around him feel important. But as time went on, the charm began to wear thin, replaced by a growing ache in your chest that you couldn’t quite name.

It started with the little things, because it was always the little things, wasn’t it?

The way Arda’s eyes lit up when she walked into the room, a brightness in his eyes that you had noticed only rarely when he looked at you, a look that you had to work hard for that she so effortlessly attained.

The way he would talk about her, his best friend, and it was indisputable the way his voice would soften, laced with fondness and warmth that made your heart twist with something bitter.

You tried to ignore it, telling yourself it was nothing, that you were being paranoid, but the doubt lingered, gnawing at the edges of your happiness.

You remember the first time you truly felt like a third wheel. The three of you were out for dinner, and it had scared you, how fast date night had turned into more than just you and Arda alone.

The conversation flowed easily between them, a rhythm you struggled to keep up with. You laughed at their jokes, nodded along to stories you weren’t a part of, but it was like watching a movie you weren’t cast in. Arda made some offhand comment, and her laughter rang out, loud and free, and the pride in Arda’s eyes at eliciting that very reaction made you want to claw out your own. You had tried to join in, but the moment had already passed, leaving you feeling awkward and out of place.

It escalated to the point where you felt like you were watching them from behind a glass wall, there but only barely. You were only an onlooker, watching but never part of the moment.

You began to wonder whether Arda even realised you were there.

It hurt, but you swallowed the pain, telling yourself it was just your imagination. But the cracks in your relationship widened, little fissures that deepened with every glance, every shared moment you weren’t a part of. You tried to bring it up once, tried to tell Arda how you felt, but he brushed it off, laughing softly as he assured you there was nothing to worry about.

“You’re being silly,” he said, pressing a kiss to your forehead and then it was back to her again.

The kiss had meant to be warm, but you only felt a deep bone chilling cold, freezing you in place.

The little kiss on your forehead, a gesture of comfort, had brought more pain to you in that moment than anything else.

The pain had begun to grow so egregious, it had begun to affect you physically, that when you began to cough up blood, you had felt at first that it was only your bleeding heart. It wasn’t long after that when you started to feel the changes in your body. The fatigue that wouldn’t go away, the bruises that appeared without reason, the weight loss you couldn’t explain. You tried to ignore it, chalking it up to stress or exhaustion, but deep down, you knew something was wrong. You could feel it, a quiet dread settling in the pit of your stomach, growing heavier with each passing day.

Arda had been so caught up with her, he never noticed.

Of course a visit to the Doctor, alone, confirmed that you had a diagnosis of terminal cancer, and not just a severely broken heart.

You had sat there, in the cold sterile room, resigned at your fate, the doctor’s words echoing inside your head.

“We found something,” he had said, his voice gentle but firm. The words that followed blurred together, a litany of medical terms and probabilities, but the meaning was clear enough. It was cancer—aggressive, late-stage, the kind that doesn’t leave much room for hope.

You decided that you would keep this to yourself. Finding that telling Arda to be something more difficult than the entire ordeal you had been subjected to.

All you felt was if, when, your presence would disappear from Arda’s life, would he miss you? And then you shook your head, how could he, because you had already disappeared from Arda’s life ages ago.

You came to the realization that though you had still a beating heart, you were a ghost now, haunting the edges of a relationship that no longer felt like yours.

You went home that day, walking through the door as if nothing had changed. Arda greeted you with a smile, asking how your day was, and you answered with a lie that came too easily, your voice had remained steady, betraying nothing. You sat with him on the couch, feeling their warmth beside you, but all you could think about was how much time you had left—how many more moments like this you’d get,

You felt selfish, knowing that you weren’t breaking up with him even if your relationship had come to an end ages ago. You wanted to delude yourself into thinking that Arda, some part of him atleast, still loved you.

And when the pain became too much, when your body started to betray you with weakness and exhaustion, you found excuses. You were tired from work, you said. You weren’t feeling well, maybe just a cold. Arda would look at you with concern, but he believed you—why wouldn’t he? He had no reason to doubt you, no reason to think that something so terrible could be lurking just beneath the surface.

The days blurred into weeks, and the cancer spread, a silent invader you couldn’t stop. You could feel it inside you, gnawing away at your strength, your hope, your future. The pain was constant now, a dull ache that radiated through your bones, but you bore it in silence, hiding the worst of it behind closed doors. You were familiar with heartache, what was a little more agony?

But Arda was perspective, at least somewhat. He noticed how you’d down a pill after every meal, the pallor of your skin, and your ghostly complexion. He noticed the bags under your eyes, and how frail you’d gotten, but it was too late.

You felt the day arrive, the day you knew that your life had reached its end, and it had took all your energy to muster up the strength to write everything you had wanted to say into a letter.

Dear Arda,

I don’t know how to begin this letter, and even if I did, I’m not sure it would be enough to say all that I need to say. But I’m running out of time, and I need you to hear this, even if it’s only in the words I leave behind. By the time you read this letter, you’ll know why I’ve written it.

First, I want you to know I’ve always admired you, Arda. From the moment we met, I knew there was something special about you—something warm and bright that drew people in, like a lighthouse in the dark. I’ve watched you bring so much joy to those around you, and it hurt me incredibly when I realised that I never did the same for you, rather it was your best friend, but now that I’m going, i’m happy that you have someone who makes you just as happy as you do with everyone else.

I have told you this, but i’ll say it again,I love you, Arda. Even though loving you hurt me more than anything, i’m grateful to have met you, and I wish nothing but the best for you, I wish you happiness for eternity.

I’m sorry for not telling you sooner. I’m sorry for keeping you in the dark about what was happening to me, but I couldn’t bear the thought of you looking at me with pity, of you worrying about me when you already had so much on your shoulders. I didn’t want you to see me like this, broken and scared, knowing there was nothing you could do to stop it. You were always so strong, so solid, and I couldn’t bear to take that away from you.

By the time you read this, I’ll be gone, Cancer does that. I’m sorry I didn’t say goodbye in person, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to hold it together if I did. I wanted you to remember me as I was, not as I am now. I wanted you to keep that image of me in your mind, whole and happy, instead of the person I’ve become.

Anyway, I’m asking you to live your life, Arda. Don’t let my passing weigh on you. Don’t let it stop you from being the person you’re meant to be. I want you to be happy. I want you to find joy, even if it takes time. You deserve that. You deserve everything good in this world.

I loved you, Arda. I still do. And I’ll carry that love with me, wherever I’m going. Please don’t cry for me. Just remember me, and remember that I wanted you to live, really live, even after I’m gone.

With love,

You signed the letter and then, finally, you allowed yourself to cry.

Sobs wracked through your body, all the pain that you felt flowing out like a waterfall and that’s how you left, tear stained cheeks and curled up in bed.

It was pitiful, but it had been how you felt, Helpless.

When Arda came home that evening, he found the apartment eerily quiet. The air felt thick, heavy with something he couldn’t quite place. He called your name, but there was no answer. He knew you had been feeling off lately, more tired, more distant, but he never expected this. His heart pounded in his chest as he made his way through the apartment, a creeping dread settling in his stomach.

And then he saw you.

You were lying on the bed, your body still, too still. He rushed to your side, his breath catching in his throat as he called your name again, louder this time, but still no response. His hands shook as he reached out to touch you, his fingers trembling against your cold skin.

“Please,” he whispered, his voice breaking. “Please, wake up…”

But you were gone.

The realization hit him like a freight train, knocking the breath from his lungs. He collapsed beside you, his hands clutching at you desperately, as if he could somehow pull you back from the brink. Tears streamed down his face, hot and unrelenting, as the full weight of your loss crashed over him.

He found the letter on the nightstand beside the bed, your handwriting scrawled across the paper, shaky but familiar. With trembling hands, he unfolded it, his eyes scanning the words you had left behind for him. As he read, his tears fell harder, soaking the paper, smudging the ink.

The letter was like a knife to the heart. Every word was a reminder of how much you had suffered in silence, of how you had loved him, even as you were slipping away. He could barely breathe as he read your confession, and when he reached the end of the letter, regret consumed his being, enveloping and guilt drowned him.

He cried, his sobs wracking his body as he clutched the letter to his chest. He cried for you, for the time you didn’t have, for the things he never said. He cried for the feelings he hadn’t realized you felt, for the guilt that now gnawed at him, knowing you had kept this burden from him, from everyone. He cried because he couldn’t save you, because you were gone, and there was nothing he could do to bring you back.

But he cried most for his blindness, how couldn’t he have noticed how you had felt, how had he let you feel so unloved, so ignored.

Self loathing plagued him as he sat there, pondering whether he could have saved your life, only if he hadn’t been so stupid.

He wished for time to turn back, he wished to change the way he had treated you, but it was too late.

fin.

[thekirammanjinx]

idk if you wanna get rambling asks abt arcane so if not im so sorry pls ignore me but im throwin hands with the next person to call caitlyn a fascist LKJFKJLKFJKFJF like,,,, im sorry but u completely ignored how she didnt want the power and how she didnt want things to continue, she literally says the police state has gone on months longer than she ever wanted and LITERALLY the worst thing cait does is,,,, before she's even in power LKJFLKJFKLJF like the use of the grey i the worst thing she does, every other pressure of power is done,,,, by ambessa with caitlyn following at the start but very obviously already working to get out of her grief following her when act 2 starts lkgdkjdsglkjdsg like even when shes in her evil era, shes reforming the prison, shes trying to keep the peace, shes only lashing out when her grief is spun about by jinx and tht is constantly happening bcuz shes become the face of the revolution and Ambessa is constantly manipulating her to stoke the flames of her rage dglkjsldkjglksjgd even at her WORST, cait tried her best to mitigate deaths, to remove only those connected to jinx, and wanted to press for the release of the police state to try and calm the people,,,,, and then when she does give up her power, she literally HANDS IT TO SEVIKA to give her seat on the council, loses an EYE to protect her people, and is probably lauded as a war hero, which is why she won't be investigated like my girl was never a full blown fascist dictator, she was literally trying to wear the mantle her mother left behind her, literally shown in the scenes where she dons the cape, trying to be the person she had to be as a leader in the council where she has to be someone other than herself, something shes always loathed about topside, and she hated it, hated herself, the entire fucking time lgkjksjgdlkjgd i'm not excusing her actions, she fucked up and she will probably spend the rest of her life atoning bcuz thats just who she is but like the lack of nuanced thought when it comes to caitlyn in this fandom is so wild, esp since shes a narrative foil to jinx and so many people love jinx

This got long, ofc, thank you for the discussion anon:

Its like when people call her "kkkiramman" like nothing she did or believed ever aligned with the extremity of that hate group. She definitely became less sympathetic and understanding and colder, but she never full on hated zaun in it's entirety. We can still visibly see her reservations. She did have her hand and role to play but to believe she in anyway compares is absolute blasphemous.

We can hold caitlyn accountable without being god awful extremist about it.

People want to throw alot of buzz words around. But let's be for real for a moment and talk about how ambessa utilized and took advantage of caitlyn's grief to groom her into this person who would write off ambessa war crimes. The way ambessa continued to twist the knife and dangle jinx like a carrot in front of Cait.

Ambess orchestrating the attack on the memorial was the first match lit. Like she did not give a single fuck the collateral to get what she wanted. She took someone she could manipulate in her conquest to start a war so piltover would be forced to make the weapons she desired.

When we see Caitlyn waver in front of ambessa "the sword cuts both ways" ambessa is quick with her trained manipulation. Always coaxing the flames of caitlyn's hatred for jinx. Making sure that she can't even begin to consider if it would be worth it in the end. But also ambessa brought her this far so backing out now would've felt like a waste. Truly a defeat. She would've pushed vi away for nothing, in her mind.

Caitlyn is not absolved of her crimes. She literally says this herself?! Hello people. But people who write her off as irredeemable make my head spin.

If you think saying "she grew up privileged and had the luxury of grieving" suddenly makes every emotion in her go away then maybe you shouldn't be watching any shows or consuming media. Like the class war between piltover and zaun is very important but that's not what the take away is supposed to be and so many people miss that. Everyone wants to think they're truly fighting some irl classist war when they dont extend any nuance to Cait.

"She faced one death and couldn't handle it" girl she faced one murder, by jinx that she believes she could've prevented. She faced being abducted from her own bathroom by jinx. Like jinx truly terrorized her, yall expected her not to see red when it came to jinx. Maybe if they added little squiggly and distortions people would get the message that she was traumatized by jinx.

If this were any other show "the mental illness made them do it" would not be a write off for jinx.

I guess it's fine if silco and jinx terrorize their own people in zaun because they're on the same class level?

I love jinx but I wish people would look at her critically. Look at why she's such an interesting character. Jinx and Caitlyn are so much foils but people don't get that. Caitlyn is really wearing the crimes of every enforcer on her shoulder, at this point I wouldn't be surprised if fandom personally blamed her for killing vi parents.

I think we always saw that caitlyn was never too far gone which made every complacency hurt more. Wanting for her to wake up from her blinded rage that had her being ambessa accomplice, so to speak, so to say she is irredeemable... i cannot.

Someone will misread this and think I'm not holding caitlyn accountable or that I'm dismissing her actions. Which I'm not.

[stuffyflowers]

What do you think Ceroba does after a Neutral run where you kill Starlo? Does she ever accept that you really did it? Does she end up tumbling into an even worse mental state? Does she ever get support from, like, the remaining Feisty Four?

ohhhhhh that’s a LOADED question i could absolutely ramble abt this.

I might as well drop my answer in the “does she know?” poll: im a “she has a hunch but doesn’t act on it” truther.

After weeks (or maybe even just days) of searching, she’s the first to come to the realisation that he’s not missing, he’s dead. She knows him better than anyone, she knows that even in his lowest moment he would never disappear for this long. In general she’s also just the most grounded monster in the wild east: while the others can indulge themselves in hope and optimism that he’ll return, she can just face reality and know the odds are definitely stacked against starlo being alive at this point

She would eventually accept that clover did it, too. It was a thought itching at the back of her mind ever since she first saw them on the cliffs, just… standing there. Only now is she ready to put the pieces together, who else could have possibly done it? The four were angry at him, but they were all still close friends just going through a rough patch. Clover, though? From the very beginning of their wild east journey, she had suspected they weren’t really… into it. They were being basically held there against their will, after all. If anyone would be willing to pull the trigger on star, it would be them.

And I imagine she would develop a guilt complex over this, of course. I’ve mentioned a lot before that she has a tendency to blame herself for things even when its out of her control, notably how she says she let chujin work himself to death when chujin is the one that intentionally hid everything from her, including the warning signs that his life was at risk. This would extend to star, I think. Her entire role in the wild east is as an observer, she watches over clover and encourages them to come to a peaceful resolution with starlo by playing along. When she leaves him, just like the four, she willingly left star alone with someone she knows could cause him significant harm (“humans are dangerous”, of course.). ESPECIALLY if we assume this is on a neutral route where ceroba already knew clovers soul is impure and thus had killed monsters before. What was she thinking??? How could she allow herself to set boundaries and leave him alone??? Who cares if what he said hurt her feelings, her feelings don’t matter. She should have been there to protect him.

So uh. Yeah. Definitely falls into a worse mental state. Losing the only person she was still close to, and in her mind it was all her fault, just like in chujin and kanakos case. She could have put a stop to his killer, too, but she didn’t. This is her new rock bottom.

I’ve already rambled on so long but uh feisty four uhhhh… honestly idk if they’d be able to do much for her. She isn’t close to them, really. Not enough for her to consider them her friends, apparently (“Starlo was the only friend I had left”). Ceroba would probably have trouble finding support in general as at this point she’s still hiding so much from everyone in relation to her family and the mission she had been left with. Letting her guard down to talk about how stars death affected her would mean having to talk about them, as well. Ceroba is stubborn, too, so I think it would be a long time before she truly lets herself get support from anyone

… and I think itd be more likely from crestina and solomon, tbh. She doesn’t talk much to the four, but she does talk to stars parents a lot, esp in relation to star himself. They’re the first ones she goes to consult abt stars disappearance, too. I think if anyone was able to get her to open up and get the support she desperately needs, it would be them.

[nokaru]

Friend! Do you have any songs that remind you of Umihebi and/or Torou, together or individually??

Oh my darling you have no idea...sorry this took so long I got tired ahhh

I made this playlist ages ago, it's still in my drafts here too - never got around to actually posting it BUT it's here! I dub thee UmiTorou playlist: toxic gfs commiting crimes

I'll go about this the same way I would with other playlist posts so here are selected few with some commentary and lyrics ^^ putting it under read more

girl in red - You Stupid Bitch

Don't bite your lip or grit your teeth Just count to ten and try to breathe You stupid bitch, can't you see The perfect one for you is me?

need i say more? this is so UmiTorou. I see this song from Torou's pov, trying to chat up Umihebi after there was something between them already. (bonus points for girl in red and the beat)

Beabadoobee - The Perfect Pair

You ought to know that I think we're one and the same I don't think we could help it No, I don't think we could help it We don't talk much Guess 'cause nothing has changed And I'm not sure I like it And I'm so tired of fighting

perfect pair they sure are, also Beadadoobee's voice is giving UmiTorou if they were lo-fi. Something about being obviously bad for each other but also so so perfect for this one person only.

AURORA - Cure For Me

I run from the liars, the fuel on the fire I know I created myself I know I can't fight the sad days and bad nights But I never asked for your help

You got hurt No, we don't belong together So you took the love from my arms Into the arms of yours But I don't need a cure for me I don't need it

This one reminds me more of Umihebi and Torou individually (but also as a couple) - esp the "I created myself" line. I love evil women and implications they are the way they are because of nobody than themselves. No man involved for backstory, I am who I am because I chose this kinda deal.

The Brobecks - Visitation of the Ghost

You think that I don't know your game A pretty, pretty, pretty little face Despite every book and every little kiss you took She'll take your place

Umihebi to Torou, while they still danced around each other like they are not obsessed with each other sigh.

CRAWLERS - Come Over (again)

Take her name out of your mouth You don't deserve to mourn You just love the attention Or do you get bored? You like the power you have Hope you get caught in the law Do you think that you're happy? Just wait 'til you're sure

This is actually one of my Umihebi character songs cause it fits perfectly with my OCs and their relatioship with Umi + Umi origins. Basically Umihebi getting kicked around for her arrogant behaviour part 1

Mitski - A Pearl

You're growing tired of me You love me so hard and I still can't sleep You're growing tired of me And all the things I don't talk about Sorry, I don't want your touch It's not that I don't want you Sorry, I can't take your touch It's just that I fell in love with a war Nobody told me it ended And it left a pearl in my head And I roll it around every night Just to watch it glow Every night, baby, that's where I go

UmiTorou rocky relatioship 0.2, they are both complicated people (one more than the other) and they just CAN'T talk about it. Over their dead bodies.

The Dresden Dolls - My Alcoholic Friends

I'm trying hard Not to be ashamed Not to know the name Of who is waking up beside me Or the date, the season or the city But at least the ceiling's very pretty Should I choose a noble occupation? If I did I'd only show up late and sick And they would stare at me with hatred Plus my only natural talent's wasted on my alcoholic friends

Torou song right there!! Yes, maybe a bit cheesy but just listen to it...its so Torou and Obi coded. While Obi might have chosen the noble occupation, Torou (mind you not inherently evil) can't see herself as anything else than what she is now. She won't let go of her current life, just the thought of losing the freedom of it makes her sick.

Epic the Musical - My Goodbye

You are reckless Sentimental at best That's not a teaching of mine You've grown soft Your dead friends can attest Put your emotions aside You're a warrior Meant to lead the rest I don't know where I went wrong But I warned you And you failed the test

Umihebi getting kicked around by my OC for development part 2 (after getting arrested !!gone physical!! :0)

Chappell Roan - Pink Pony Club

I'm having wicked dreams of leaving Tennessee Hear Santa Monica, I swear it's calling me Won't make my mama proud, it's gonna cause a scene She sees her baby girl, I know she's gonna scream God, what have you done?

this became crazy Umihebi centric so this one is purely Torou song. I mean Chappell was made for her come on now...why Pink Pony Club? It's the vibes + my wife iilfal's fanfic about Torou's backstory (tho only vaguely). Also the line "I'm gonna keep on dancing" is so Torou and her lay-back personality. She would be the bomb in any club.

[jadelotusflower]

Stargate rewatch: 1x07 The Nox

aka Space Pacifists.

“We've already visited 19 separate worlds." EXCUSE ME?!?! Abydos, Chulak, Mongol planet, planet where Sam "drank the stuff", The Land of Light, UV planet, blue crystal planet, and that's just SG-1. I'm being generous and not counting any of the home planets they sent the refugees from CotG back to, but that only leaves 12 planets for all nine SG teams to have visited offscreen in the months before this? Even taking into account that not all of them may be exploration teams, this is stretching credulity. Was this episode meant to be earlier in the season?

Daniel and Sam are back in their helmets - maybe this was meant to be placed earlier.

Why did the Nox cloak the Stargate in the first place if they want to be left alone?

This episode was written by Hart Hanson, who would go on to create/exec produce Bones. It was his only Stargate script.

By a galactic coincidence, Apophis is also looking for the invisibility hummingbird at the very same time SG-1 is - but it kind of works, Apophis has had a First Prime rebel against him, he’d be afraid of looking vulnerable to the other system lords and is in need of an advantage over them.

Watching these episodes in HD you can really see how much everyone is just acting though the Vancouver rain. Look at poor Chris Judge’s head!

Daniel is all in a tither wanting to capture Apophis - it’s the first real mention we’ve had of Sha’re and Skaara in several episodes. He’s the one pushing for it - when things get Personal for Daniel he gets fixated and while he marshals his arguments, they’re coloured by emotion.

Jack by contrast keeps it tampered down - but he wants to be convinced and in the end quite easily is, importantly with Teal’c’s support (which isn’t given without bias either). Sam is the only one with reservations.

I think this is the first time we see Daniel actually fire his weapon. Doesn’t hit anything though.

Apophis personally takes out Jack, Sam, and Daniel, which is kind of badass. He’s a Goa’uld who leads from the front lines.

That’s death no. 2 for Daniel so far.

“Dal shakka mel - I die free.” This will become a mantra for Teal’c and the Free Jaffa moment, although they later change the Goa’uld version to Shal’kek nem’ron.

Jack and Sam both sniff the fruit the Nox give them, and Jack gives it a little buff before taking a bite. Sam doesn’t actually seem to eat it, and Daniel’s too distracted trying to communicate to do anything but hold it.

“You attacked them.” I love Lya so much, and she had their number here - it’s a good setup because absent of context it does look like SG-1 was trying to kill Apophis without provocation, and the Nox have good reason to be wary of them.

“We just wanted to take him back to our world to have a little chat with him about all the nasty, bad things he’s been doing.” I love RDA’s delivery of this. And Daniel, echoing the bad, looking pretty murderous, seeing as Apophis has been doing those bad things to his wife. I do appreciate that Shanks commits to playing the subtext around Sha’re even when it isn’t explicit in the dialogue.

Great dynamic between Teal’c and Shak’l - he could not be the mentor Bra’tac was for him, and created a rival rather than an acolyte.

Aw, Jack still getting jittery about weapons around kids.

“Knowledge takes time, and over the years we teach the young to be wise.” Daniel trying to get information out of grandpappy Nox but not really hearing what he’s saying - that knowledge must be learned, not simply told. This is the arc for Daniel over the whole series and particularly around his later ascension - at this stage he wants to absorb as much information as he can, without really understanding it.

Daniel wearing gloves most of this episode again when no one else seems to be.

Great scene between Jack and Anteaus as well - Jack’s frustration comes from a good place, but it’s misguided and paternalistic.

I love the faerie, wood-sprite aesthetic of the Nox, especially this branch/flower arbor.

LOL Sam kicks one of the Jaffa right in the crotch. And due to a continuity error, we see it twice!

Daniel then shoots the Jaffa with a staff weapon - unclear whether or not he dies (if so I guess the Nox bring him back to life). But it’s not as if this is the first time Daniel has killed, he offed at least one Jaffa in the movie, so I guess he’s a better shot with the staff weapon than a handgun.

“The very young do not always do as they are told.” This might as well be the show’s tagline.

Interesting that we’ve had two cautionary tales so far, to ensure the show isn’t always in favour of US imperialising all over the galaxy.

[cartoonrival]

you might have talked about this before, but I'd love to know what the Chaotix are like in your AU! I miss the archie crew so bad

YAAA so the whole gang is knux, js, mighty, ray, charmy, espio, and vector. charmy hasn’t gotten back from his colony in my archie reading so idk saffron yet, but considering her position in the story as charmys fiancé and that my version would def have charmy still be 6 (and not a prince), i’m not currently planning on including her but idk maybe her character will really speak to me and ill find a way to rewrite her backstory and fit her in another way.

mighty and ray’s meeting story is a little different, i still like the idea of ray not having any living family left and mighty rescuing him, but instead of the whole prison camp thing i think ray was a survivor in a roboticized town that the chaotix visited (without needing to deal w the echidnaopolis/dingos/good-god-what-is-that debacles they would prob be a bit closer tied to the freedom fighters, but i still Do want to give them their own unique facet of the story instead of just ffs version2. still a wip.). maaaaaybe ray reminds mighty of tilly and thats part of the reason why he takes ray in, but tbh i’m not a big fan of the whole “i only (started to) care about this person because they remind me of someone else i loved.” especially in light of rays anxiety about mighty getting tilly back and being scared tilly would replace him. so still not set in stone why mighty would decide to invite ray to join them. maybe it was just his big ole eyes. he looked very polite

something i kinda wanna explore is the origins of the detective agency, i don’t think id try to involve everyone in it though. it would still just be espio charmy and vector. the three of them eventually move off the island for business reasons, which would lead into why they’re so strapped for cash in a way that doesn’t seem to be affecting knuckles mighty js and ray. because the former three are actually trying to enter an at least somewhat capitalist society (sorry). i’m not sure how it would end up being those 3 specifically though or why they would decide to become detectives. i’m coming up with nearly all of this on the spot because you prompted me to even think hard about it (thank you)

charmy def only came along because when push comes to shove hes their little brother and they couldnt leave him behind, maybe it was esp and vec’s idea to begin with because they started accidentally solving cases and found they were actually good at it, and kinda similar to how they got a lot of work after the metal virus helping ppl find loved ones, they figured they could be of similar help with deroboticized mobians, and the other four just respectfully declined (knux and js for obvious reasons, and mighty just didnt think he was cut out for that sort of thing. and ray is sticking w mighty).

js and knux are def the two most tightly rooted to the island, but js is more prone to cabin fever than knuckles is so she does leave pretty often. usually she tries to get knuckles to come with her and someone else will watch the emerald, but even though knuckles DOES trust his friends he gets kinda antsy if hes away from it for too long or too often, so a lot of the time she leaves by herself or with someone else. archie!chaotix kind of put the story in a position where knuckles didnt have to worry about the master emerald quite as much because he had a bunch of friends who lived on the island and could cycle through guard duty when he wasnt there. it wasnt a BAAAD thing per se but the emerald is such a key part of knuckles character that i feel like if he no longer has to bear that weight alone then the core of his character is lost a bit ToT if you know what im saying. so i dont want him to be quite so willing to just let someone else handle it.

im on the fence about espio's spy backstory w the shinobi, i enjoyed READING it but idk if id want to carry through with it. the idea of him learning stuff that he just keeps from people could be recycled somehow though

[pisspope]

cat ive got couple coming right up

🐶💕(this one esp)💚💤🌟💋🛡

and the last but not least✅whos the housewife of the household (aka does all the cooking and cleaning and will look stunning in a backless apron)

speak i listen 🎤🎤🎤

oh for u mae? anything

🐶: If you and your f/o were to get a pet, what would it be?

Okay so in canonverse we have two rats that are retirees from a marleyan science experiment. one of ems got a piece of ear missing and the other is mostly blind but zeke likes to set them on his shoulders while he reads the paper. Sees them as kindred spirits (Beast being used for science experiments and all), also jokes about them having the same amount of time left (rats only live about two years). Which... jeez zeke. Hilarious but jeez.

In modern aus we have a kid named Xavier and until she's able to speak we call her our pet but otherwise?? Too busy. Might get a cat in our later years though.

💕: Who’s the clingier one in the relationship?

it's zeke he's soooooo whiny. like once ur his person u r His Person and he will not let you forget it for a second. gets out of work or some activity early and is calling you up like "why aren't you homeeeeee I wanna watch tvvvvvv". Not physically clingy but verbally and emotionally clingy. Sends u a text and then sends "🥺" every five minutes until you respond.

💚: Who gets jealous?

BOTH. we both act like we're hot shit but also secretly think the other person is settling. I keep it on the dl then get a little buzzed and say "do u like [person] better than me be honest 👉👈🥺" and he has to reassure me that no, now and forever everyone but me can suck eggs. zeke will get fake jealous because I think it's sexy ("saw u waving at the mailman today. fucking tart." then we [redacted][redacted][redacted]), but also gets actually jealous specifically when I talk about my thing for older men. Def have a come-to-ymir moment in the idol au after I flirt too much with label director Zachary if u catch my drift.

💤: Do you sleep together? If so, describe your sleeping positions and patterns (E.g. who steals the blankets, are either of you insomniacs, etc.)

So we do sleep in the same bed but,,,,,, our sleep schedules are insanely fucked. Like it's been known to happen on occasion that I go to bed before midnight and he doesn't wake up at 4 AM to eat a cheese stick and crash on the couch watching markiplier but it's rare. actually a boon in aus where we have a kid or two because one of us is usually up at any point during the day or night to answer inane requests. both sleep in fetal position backs to each other asses touching bc if I see his bits or he sees mine it's on sight ://// horn dogs :///

🌟: Who’s the tease in the relationship?

Me :) although he stone faces his way through it in public. second we're home though teehee I'm in danger (affectionate). 100% a pants wearer so the second I walk out of the bathroom in a skirt he knows I'm gonna be flirty and obnoxious all fucking day. eyes rolling into the back of his head but he secretly enjoys it.

💋: Where are your favorite places to kiss your f/o/where are their favorite places to kiss you?

I like to smooch him right underneath his jaw where his beard is sparse so I can kiss and then pull at the longer stubble so he yelps. also kissing his stomach and pulling at his chest hairs, a little mean and a little sweet at the same time.

hes an inner thigh kisser and biter no doubt in my damn mind. also likes pressing kisses to the lips down there idk idk idk

🛡: Who’s the more protective one?

hmm see this is a tough call because it's kind of neither? we're pretty independent of one another so we end up holding our own a lot. I do have a tendency to just lay down and take it when someone's mean though so if zekes in the room when that happens? oh I pity whoever spoke ill of me. but this is only if I'm in the room and its more of him defending me because I didn't stick up for myself, like if someone were to talk shit and I weren't there? He'd probably just shrug it off or even chuckle and agree. So yeah. Cake is not winning a chivalry contest any time soon.

✅️: Who does the housework?

Trick question because Zeke does the chores to the best of his ability in a little "May the Forks Be With You" Star Wars apron but his best is my half-assed. so he does the chores and I thank him soooo much then while he sleeps or does work I pick up the detail work. type to glass clean all the windows but not dust all the surfaces ynow. neither of us can cook tho :/ zeke boils hot dogs and expects a compliment for using the stove

[kxmikomrade]

oh ho ho

why hello there

I just read through a bunch of the stuff you have about yourself, and now you have to deal with me <3

so first of all: i saw that you really liked blue period, and I was wondering how you'd recommend it? I keep on wanting to watch it but my mind goes "but you have this thing" and "what about the other three animes you're watching" but who cares! It looks really pretty tho. Also me and my partner are going to watch Bungo Stray Dogs together (eventually-) bc it's his favorite anime lol.

ok next point: WATERMELON IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE FOODS I LOVE WATERMELON. MINT CHOCOLATE CHIP ICE CREAM IS THE BEST. and i agree, winter and autumn are the best seasons. rain. rain is nice :).

third and i think final thing: you're learning japanese, you say? ok, i have a few questions for you. what are you learning it on? (i'm learning it on the demon bird app, aka duolingo). what words have you learned? what do you know about the grammar/word structure? and the scary one: have you started learning the terror that is katakana? (if no, it's just another alphabet with the same order and sounds, except different characters. i hate katakana :,>) because i can't type in japanese on my chromebook, i'll just use the romanji. But expect me to send you random hiragana and have you say what it is!

Kimu-san, yahho! Anata ga kakkoii to karai desu yo! (i promise you it's a compliment <3)

try to tell me what that means, and expect more random japanese in your future :)

anyways have a lovely day byeee <3

when i saw the 'oh ho ho' i heard french venti LMAOOO 💀💀

omg new moot guys NEW MOOT !! u match my vibe so <3

BLUE PERIOD IS SO SHHEHEHEHHE esp if ur an artist like myself, it gives u a different and probably more professional view of art ^^ For wat i like abt it, i'd say da characters and how theyre written. The main character is pretty relatable. Theres another character who has family issues and may be trans (or genderfluid? it isnt confirmed but she was born male, currently dresses feminine and hates it when people uses her dead name). Another one who was born a 'Genius' but doesnt really understand art, hes only doing it bcs its basically wat he can only do. Another character who'm gets compared to her older sister and so on. Even minor characters have well written stories I suggest u watch da anime THEN read da manga from da beginning :>> Sanaol may partner- jkjk ur prob fil but imagien having a partner 😭 my lonely ass could never U SHOULDD WATCH BSD!! I LOVEEE DA ENDINGS ITS SUCH A VIBE AND DA OPS R BANGERS UGH THE CHARACTER DESIGNS AND PLOT I WANNA 👊 ITS INTERESTING BUT I SUGGEST ALSO READING THE MANGA FROM THE BEGINNING SINCE THE ANIME SKIPS ALOT OF THINGS AND IT MIGHT GET U CONFUSED 😭😭 Also, hes so true for that, hes DEF a keeper 💪 unless hes a mori/fukuchi stan then ew no

YESSS WATERMELON AND MINT CHOCO CHIP ICECREAM LOVERSS <333 Honestly, cold weathers >>>>>>

Im currently just memorizing da basics; hiragana and katakana before i continue off where i left off in grammar and vocab (i'll most likely start over since its been arounf half a year and i have goldfish memory 🥲) Ive already memorized hiragana, now im going with katakana but im focusing on art lately since i just got my stylus back so im prob not gonna do it for awhile but i'll try to before may >:DD I currently only use 'Write it Japanese!' app on mobile, its REALLY useful, idk anything to help with grammar but my jp speaking friend recommends da book 'Minna no nihongo'. She used to be my jp study buddy but shes been VERY busy with uni lately so :'''D AND YES BBG (can i call u dat??) LETS PRACTICE TOGETHER <33 tbh it would be better if we use hiragana/katakana/kanji (i literally dont know kanji SOBS) since it helps us learn!! AND DAT WOULD BE FUNN

From just my understanding: 'Kim-san, Yahoo/hello! Youre a cool person [smth smth]'

from google: 'Kimu, Yahoo! It hurts to think you're cool' (pls get ur shit together google 😭😭i couldnt call my friends bitches lovingly bcs of u)

YES I'LL BE EXPECTING THEM <33 I HOPE U HAVE A LOVELY DAY TOO HON

LMAO WAT DO I CALL U?? I WANNA ADD UR MOOT TAG

[roosterforme]

ok so i have some like drama & i need a little advice if u wouldn’t mind😅 (also fair trigger warning at the end i do mention someone ik having suicidal thoughts so if you’re not comfortable i understand)

so i’m 21 but i got ahead in school (i finished my undergrad last spring & im currently in grad school) & over the summer i decided to join the “party” scene (mostly bc i felt like finishing early + covid robbed me of my college years) (also worst mistake of my life bc that was the worst summer i’ve ever had)

i ended up coming out of the summer w/ little bit of a drinking problem as well. fast forward to nov, my friend group split into 2 groups bc one liked another & he didn’t like him back. so obvi i go w/ one friend bc he’s my bff & this girl i didn’t know all that well “joins” our “side”. she’s 24 almost & the complete opposite to me (not saying that it’s bad it’s just i’m a rlly studious/reserved person most of the time, call me boring i would prefer to stay home & watch a shitty movie where as she is big into partying & super outgoing)

i wanted to distance myself from her before the friend group broke up just bc i knew we didn’t have a lot in common + she also belittled me & tried to force me into her own habits sometimes (making fun of my obsession w/ top gun, joking abt the one guy she knows i’ve been w/ when she’s been w/ guys way worse, making fun of me for liking taylor swift, screaming at me for not finishing the rest of a bottle of liquor (we had already drank half of it earlier) at 6 am when the party ended 3 hours prior, trying to get me to do molly/coke when i told her no so many times)

so anyways, finally like 2 days ago she called my friend & i a loser bc we both used dating apps to find guys instead of going to bars or something (idk why he would be a loser, he’s not even 21 yet, how’s he gonna get inside the bar??) (i’m also usually pretty non confrontational, esp w/ her bc ik she can get heated but i was severely sleep deprived/stressed) so i told her if we’re losers than what is she since the last guy she was in love w/ & met at a bar had gone to jail & was currently going back soon. all she said was that she wasn’t gonna talk to us the rest of the week & i didn’t even respond bc i didn’t care. the next day my other friend in the gc was like “u should talk to so & so” & i was like listen idc anymore & he tried saying he knew i cared when i don’t… i even told him i don’t have time to care (since i’m in grad school + working & the only free time i have is used for tgm tumblr or tiktok😭) i mean he shouldn’t rlly be all that surprised since i had told him in october i was gonna distance myself from her bc our lifestyles/morals (she literally drinks & drives & does not care) just weren’t the same.

my thing is, am i a cunt for just like ghosting her?? i was already planning on it so long ago. i thought maybe i could try to stick it out w/ her but i just couldn’t, esp when she just didn’t try to understand why i’ve had to give up certain things bc of my schooling/career path (she’s never gone to college + her job is… well her coworkers are 16-18 while she is 24 if that says anything). it was also rlly hard to deal w/ her constant texts abt wanting to die/kill herself (i’ve tried helping as much as i could, but as someone who has dealt w/ thoughts abt that stuff & out of recovery it’s hard to be around someone with them) she has tried to snap me twice w/ pics & i just left her on open but idk, i probably am a bitch tbh 🤷🏻‍♀️

Nope, ghost away, nonny. Ghost away.

[aknosde]

hi!! im queso again, im going to send some stuff anout tpth if thats cool :)) - tag: "I promise this isn't as sad as it sounds" you lied to me - i like how you describe the different climates in the different months!! im usually not a fan of weather descriptions to start a story but they were interesting :) - the crushing hug!! gaghhh theyre so cute - i absolutely loved everything from the point they reach the jackson-blofis house to the end of the dancing scene.. i had read the sneak peek of sally and grover dancing and that was what got me hooked and waiting for this fic!! may draw that some time - i also remember the flip phone from the six sentence posts!! it's cool and cute despite the sadness of the situation - WOAGH THEIR FIGHT... THAT'S JUST. SO WELL DONE!!! THE WHOLE SCENE!! i think that is where i found annabeth and grover the most in-character in the whole fic and other than the dance it's my favourite part of it. hands down a great moment. i'd quote some lines but they'd take over this ask - the boxes!! THE RECEIPT. i fucking died. - i honestly thought i was the only person who also thought grover's mother had left. i thought i was the only person who thought about him being an orphan in the first place - the memory with percy.... the gughh EVERYTHING ABOUT THAT PART!!!!! - "Just this once, he thinks, I’ll be selfish." i am deceased i am laying down on your front door user aknosde - the receipt. is not inocuous at all. - SALLY GIVES HIM THE KEYS AND. UGH. I KNOW BABY. IT'S HARD BUT WE'LL BE ALRIGHT. DO YOU WANT ME DEAD - clarisse was a great choice for a character to play the role she plays in that point of the story i love clarisse and her and grover interacted very nicely - he cared enough to try and try again. fucking hell - ITS A CHANGE BUT ITS NOT A BAD ONE!!! YES!!! SHE'S GROWING AND LEARNING!!!! - the percy and grover scene is so sweet and kinda sad but sweet and nice and they really know eachother and they have that stupid tiny disagreement but it's resolved so quickly... preserve MY heart bc it's dying with me - THE PRINCESS DIARIES... THEYD DEFINITELY WATCH THOSE FILMS TOGETHER ALL THE TIME - love this fic ive been waitin for it since september or so and AGH,, thank you !!!

oh my god of course thats okay!! this is such an amazing ask im gonna answer it point by point but that'll take a while so it's under the cut!

i put that tag in bc i wanted ppl to know it wasnt all sad!! (also mb bc i cant tell w my own writing after looking at it for so long)

im glad you liked the descriptions, usually they aren't my thing but the passage of time was really important in this one so i wanted it to be apparent!

crushing hug!! my bsf is really good at cracking backs and has several ways to do it through hugs and i thought annabeth would too

im glad you liked that scene. it was inspired by the entire whats going on album and the song dancing with your ghost by sasha sloan and i ended up really liking it too. also it does some pretty heavy lifting by setting the "norm" so you can see how things change, esp vis-a-vis sally, which is signified by grover taking over for annabeth in leading their dance (also your art is so cool if you did that i’d never shut up abt it)

flip phones!! they'll be showing up in my aie fics

im glad you liked the fight and found it in character!!! i felt it was super necessary for the story but also it was so much fun to write!! i love to see them all get angry!!!

packing up your friends' bedroom can be such a personal thing

the fact that grovers lost all his family!!!! and no one ever talks about it!!!!! 😡😫🧍‍♂️

the memory!! also very important to the story but it was also a chance for me to show percy being emotionally intelligent and deeply kind which are things i love him for <3

i think grover deserves to be selfish!!

i love sally jackson so much and while i dont think she's perfect i think she is very deeply good and she cares abt percy and his friends so much!! (also shout out to aftg for making me think abt the significance of keys 24/7)

i love clarisse i love her friendship with percy i love how mean she is and how much she cares ❤️ (also like ik annabeth isn’t a bitch in the books but she is assholeish towards rachel in botl when she’s concerned abt percy and i wanted something similar in this. so the target was drew. along w like,,, everyone else)

i never stop thinking about how percy didnt have any friends until grover and how percy was the first kid that grover treated as an actual friend, not a charge

annabeth is growing and learning!! she has so much growth even between tlo and moa!! the fact that she becomes comfortable saying ily is sooooo important to me and i decided that it was partially bc of grover

i wanted the final scene to wrap up the facets of percy that grover points out through the rest of the story and it was also important to me that we see that things aren't perfect once he gets back and that he and grover have points of contention just like grover had with annabeth. but also they've known each other forever and dont sweat the small stuff. thats real friendship <333

princess diaries!! like i said, i def think there are parallels between percy and mia and whether or not he and his friends realize it at this point i think its one of the reasons he likes watching it

im so glad it was worth the wait!!!

[hislittleraincloud]

Maybe I did rant a bit..... but still It doesn't give you the right to call people (here - actors) names and assume you know what they are thinking and feeling*. More so cause you're much older than most people here.

And you call me crazy and entitled. Your experiences don't equal others' experiences..... They are not less or more - they're just yours ¯_(ツ)_/¯. Just like everyone has their own takes on everything.

Also.... I noticed you conveniently ignored the sister thingy I mentioned ... huh... how so (⊙_⊙)？ )))

;;;;;;;;))))))

Yes, this is about Jenna in this instance. But the same could be said about Millie Bobby Brown or Finn Wolfhard (both get a lot of uwu harassment) as well as many other young and adult stars...

At this point, you're the nasty guy with all the nasty words and prescribing actions on your supposedly good analytical perception. And yes, your reblog or like count is abysmally small but still so freaking visible... Just nasty...

*(yes, we can add to this point the PWH sitch - cancel culture is 50/50 hit and miss, tho, you gotta admit!)

P.S. And sorry for calling your life miserable.... that one is on me.

You're hilarious, so I'll bite.

Maybe I did rant a bit.....

It was a LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!-level outburst that you should be proud of, little Jennanite.

{{ further whines about "calling people naaaaaames", holy shit I can hear that ringing through my ears }}

Really? Still stuck on the teasing. Exactly which 'names' upset you besides Gizmo/the Gremlin, Anon? Did this upset you

Are only the Wenclair brethren allowed to write their drabblogues and create their art saturated with height/size humor about how ✨smol✨ she is? Y'all don't own the sole rights to have fun with her height. She'll have to keep treating it like any other practical disadvantage and turn a weakness into a strength...while there may be ways to brute force other things that you want in the industry, when you're that short, it's noticeable.

Wallace is just under 6'. They cast Freeman as her leading Short King at 5'7".

Jesus, why am I trying to explain that not all teasing is terrible? Are y'all truly so soft.

(This is the point where I left it in drafts, LOL...moving on since I'm draft dumping rn)

I'm not sure where I called anyone entitled, so I'm not even gonna try but I vaguely remember something about the whine about GOOD TAKE HER SISTER WE'LL TAKE HER sentiment.

It's not all about either/or here. Spending (or wasting) time watching her sister yap about her life or whatever else is different from what Jenna does, obvs. It's interactive 'entertainment' with a genuinely sweet (and somewhat insecure 💀 even though she's holycrap stunning) person

We give TT creators hats and stupid little gifts since we as humans can't resist cute, sparkly moving things. And come on, Aliyah is one of those cute, sparkly moving things (but more than that/an object, she's just a regular girl living life like the rest of us and that can be sobering/grounding, esp. when she takes the time to just sit there at the end of the day and tolerate us 💀). ETA: Sometimes it gives us our own pleasure to make others happy, and she seems really happy to get her visual gifts (of course that means 🏦💰, but she tends to choose gifts she likes to see as goals). Can't say that I mind watching her biggest simps get her the more expensive animations LOL

There's no real room for crit, if you don't want to sit there with her you can scroll on by to one of the many other creators on TT (the ancient movie stars are funny when they go on Lives). I was scrolling, wasn't even looking for her. Didn't even know who she was at first 💩 because I never stalked the Other One.

The Other One offers herself up in her roles and photos. It's completely different, and the only real reason I'm at all invested is because she took on Wednesday and Wednesday was one of my things for most of my life (it is so ingrained that the love of my life was extremely Wednesday ✨coded✨ as you kids would say/her pfp in 2013 was her as Ricci's creepy Wednesday), so yeah, I'm gonna have critical opinions about it all and the little chile who runs her mouth about "wah fame" when it's exactly what she signed up for (we all knew what the business of fame was like by the 2010s, the whole story of why her parents didn't even want her in the business goes around yet she wanted it anyway and now complains 🤦🏽‍♂️).

"At this point, you're the nasty guy with all the nasty words and prescribing actions on your supposedly good analytical perception. And yes, your reblog or like count is abysmally small but still so freaking visible... Just nasty..."

Since 1986, baby.

And misery loves your company.

[levi-of-lesbos]

Hi so this is my first au thing in glee and I have no idea if this has been done before if it has pls reply to this post with it! Id really wanna see it

Okay so

Spoilers for Song of Achilles if you haven't read it!!

Brittana song of achilles au

The hair colours coincide - Brittany is Achilles and Santana is Patroclus

The personalities fit - brittany is free spirited, kind, popular, the vibe (esp at the start of the book) fits with each other, santana is wary of a lot of things, kind of ooc but I've seen a lot of fics portraying santana as quiet but snarky and tbh it kinda fits in canon too, esp when you compare them - Patroclus is quiet but he is loyal as hell and is the only one who dares to talk back to Achilles, he will fight you if needed

The story kinda goes the same, they meet as kids and bond and everything but just to outline

Santana arrives at the palace (?) she's kind of a loner at first, but she doesn't really wanna bother interacting with the other kids (this part is actually pretty accurate to canon imo cause when santana lives in new york she doesn't actually make a lot of friends she just interacts with the same few people, this could be taken to be cause she's a side character but it's a fun look into her personality), brittany on the other hand is very friendly, the new girl catches her eye and she does all sorts of tricks to catch her eye, shes also a very bold character I think, so she def would be the one to make the first move plus be bold enough to ask her father for the new, quiet, murderer kid to be her lifelong closest companion

For the sake of this au we are going to villainise their parents (sorry), and so brittany still gets sent away to chiron and subsequently the place where she has to disguise herself to avoid the war but santana still goes to find her every time

I also think that it would be fun for brittany to say with a grin to santana "what has hector ever done to me?"

Anyway so the war comes, there's the whole thing about achilles losing his innocence and part of what makes us root for him so much in the first place and we know that brittany is portrayed very much as a cinnamon roll in fanon (much like Achilles too tbf) and I think dark brittany would be interesting to see once her view of the world is gone

In this au puck is briseis cause I'm a sucker for puck-santana friendships in fics (I do not support or condone anything m*rk s*lling did irl I just like the character in fanon), the scene where briseis and achilles yell at each other because they both loved patroclus in different ways but they loved him all the same would be cool with Puck and Brittany, the anger between them and the grief would be so good

So anyway santana ofc dies in this, just imagine santana being scared to fight, but she knows that to protect brittany she has to go out and put herself in danger for her because she's the love of her life and she doesn't want her to die, but she ends up getting kind of ahead of herself and gets killed by hector (quick reminder that achilles slept beside patroclus' dead body for days before burning it so just picture that but brittana), brittany hearing the news that a great soldier has fallen and thinking "santana will come back and tell me about it", brittany discovering santanas the one that died and being unable to function afterwards, her innocent and sometimes naive view of the world just falling apart because santana is dead and never coming back, brittany killing hector to effectively kill herself so that she gets reunited with santana, only to arrive in the afterlife unable to find her

Santana on the other hand has to watch brittany grieve for her, unable to do anything to lessen her pain, only to get left behind by the ignorant survivors and has to wait for god knows how many years before she can finally see the love of her life again

So anyway I love angst as you can tell, if someone's done this before pls send links, this is just my take on it, please feel free to add on cause I have no idea where the rest of the glee kids would be in this au, I might or might not add on more stuff afterwards if I have more brainrot so yes

[lifeofkaze]

So. This is it. We have reached the end of a most incredible journey, and looking back on how far we have come alongside the incredible force of nature that is Artemis Hexley still makes me more emotional than it has any right to.

I've reviewed the past six years already, so you'd think there isn't much still left to say about the Saga.

If you honestly think so, you don't know a thing about me, lol. Let's roll with it.

Characterisation: It's no secret at this point that I consider your way of characterisation one of the strongest points in your writing. In Return to the Riddles, we saw the (momentary) end of character developments we followed over the course of years, some even from as far back as Year 1. What I love most about this is not only how incredibly good you are at indirect characterisation but how consistent you stayed with each and every character - no matter how "unimportant" - right until the very end. There is not a single character you have written that feels like you winged them, but all of them are well thought out and have their reasons to be how they are. You even made sure to stick with the quirks you gave them, like Penny playing with her silver bracelet whenever she's agitated. It's things like these that feel just so rewarding as a recurring reader and makes the characters you read about feel so much more like real people.

Set-Up: I have yet to meet another person who puts as much thought and planning into their work as you do, and in Return to the Riddles, you got so many moments of incredible pay-off that I honestly wanted to cry about how brilliant some of them were. All the little and big-but-well-hidden clues we got throughout the previous six stories now came to bear fruit, and it was a joy to watch. I obviously have been honoured enough to know the twists in advance, so I can well and truly marvel at just how amazing you are at foreshadowing, double-meanings and playing with your readers' expectations. It's an art, honestly, and esp with the big big reveal towards the end, I felt put back into PoA times. With PoA, I knew the Sirius-twist in advance, too, but it didn't take away from just how much I loved the book, and Return to the Riddles struck exactly the same chord for me.

Balance: No, don't worry, I'm keeping my own obsessions out of this, haha. What I mean with balance in this case, is how incredibly well you... well, balanced the heavy emotional blows and throwbacks of this story with scenes moving the plot forward. I find it easy to get lost either in emotional or plot development, but you always found exactly the right measure to switch between the two. To make it even better, you have developed such a good eye for where to put lighthearted moments, funny remarks, or just a little something to make you chuckle before a scene gets too dark and gloomy. In some places, Tonks being Tonks or Artemis being a cute but ignorant gremlin was really needed as a little breather, and you aced this perfectly.

Canon & Lore: Next to the big twists, the lore you came up with for the Cursed Vaults is the second star of this fantastical show. From the moment you first told me about it, I was absolutely sold on how the Cursed Vaults came into being, what R had to do with all of it, and what was hidden inside the last one. I don't think there is a single thing left out or unaccounted for when it comes to this point, and the fact that it weaves together your characters from all the different eras in such a smooth and beautiful way is just beautiful to behold, really. And as the absolute juicy cherry on top, you went out of your way to make sure everything that happens is 100% canon-compliant to what happens/is established in the Harry Potter books - which, honestly, is what makes your writing stand out so so so much from the masses to me. There's obv nothing wrong with bending the canon (guilty as charged, Your Honour), but I always prefer it when it's not the case, and you have mastered that discipline like no other.

Craft: Where to even start on the technical sides of your writing. Maybe with this - you know how much I admire you, and how much I am in awe of your mind and talent. You know it. I've cried a thousand times to you about how I can't believe how your mind works. It's unfair, really. But aside from all the love and care you put into The Hexley Saga, it's your writing that sets it apart from everything else I've seen so far. It's what makes this story so special and not like "fanfiction" at all, but more like "real" books, for lack of a better word. The dedication you put into these stories, all the time you spent writing them over the past two years, it's astounding and mindblowing. I learned so much from you and your method of writing/planning a story, and watching you write the Saga has made me a better writer by a thousand times. Also, the prologue/epilogue set? You know how to make me happy, bestie.

Honestly, there's so much more I could say about why everyone should read the Saga, and why I loved it, and why I love you, and why you're among my favourite authors even though you are technically "unpublished" (you know what I mean), but I think, you actually know all of this. Because you know me, and because I know you, and I think that's a pretty beautiful thing to be able to say about another person.

All that remains for me here is to apologise for all the comment spam that had you mute your phone, and all the freakouts I had on whatsapp because I couldn't believe your genius and raw emotional power in your words.

If there was one thing I could wish for The Hexley Saga, it is to one day be standing in a bound-and-pretty form on my bookshelf, right next to my Harry Potter books, because it has become my personal official prequel to the story that shaped me growing up, and it's what The Saga and its brilliant author deserve.

Artemis Hexley and the Return to the Riddles

(Part 7 of The Hexley Saga)

Ever since Artemis Hexley first arrived at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, she has found herself embroiled in the mysteries of the infamous Cursed Vaults and the elusive and dangerous group that seek them. Now, having finally sealed the last of the Vaults, Artemis prepares to begin her seventh and final year at Hogwarts no longer in their shadow.

But, between the echoes of the past and the whispers and stirrings of the near future, it seems as if neither the Cursed Vaults nor the Cabal are willing to let her go just yet. Or perhaps, with so many of her questions still unanswered and the threat of the Vaults still looming over her, it is Artemis who is unable to let go.

Either way, she is about to find out exactly what it will take for her to finally be free.

Chapter 1: The Gathering Storm

Chapter 2: Mayhem at the Ministry

Chapter 3: Shacklebolt and Shiratori

Chapter 4: The Defence of Jacob Hexley

Chapter 5: Unforgivable

Chapter 6: Missing Pieces

Chapter 7: The Most Powerful Puffskein at Hogwarts

Chapter 8: The Capture

Chapter 9: What Was Lost

Chapter 10: Apparition and Disapparition

Chapter 11: Foul Play

Chapter 12: Interrogation

Chapter 13: The Department of Mysteries

Chapter 14: A Circle Redrawn

Chapter 15: The First Test

Chapter 16: Nothing to Fear

Chapter 17: A Tangled Web

Chapter 18: Prophecy Girl

Chapter 19: Empowerment

Chapter 20: Ghosts of the Past

Chapter 21: The Last Battle

Chapter 22: Through the Darkness, and What Artemis Found There

Chapter 23: The Truth

Chapter 24: Set Free

Chapter 25: In the Beginning

Epilogue: December, 1999

[goldengashes]

Hi, just wanted to ask will you be watching season 4 and what were your thoughts on both portwell and r*na's development? What about all of them as characters? I personally was rooting for r*na in season 1. But after watching most of season 2, I prefer portwell and probably won't watch season 3 after the mess they made. I'd have been okay with r*na if the narrative made sense but sorry to say Gina has been a "maybe" to Ricky. She picked the guy she wanted since S1, but she seems to forget he's not really deserving of her attention at all after he's blown her off and asked her for relationship advice knowing she liked him. Like come on do better girl.

hey, thanks for the ask! hope you're well, anon.

i'll answer this as briefly and structured as i possibly can but i highly doubt it lmao. possible rant ahead (?)

okay so s4... i can't say that i won't tune in because essentially, i'm a huge sofia wylie fan. i've loved her since andi mack and everything she's ever put out with disney, i've watched (plus sge). and aside from that, the s4 plot (the whole og hsm movie reunion thing/wildcats being extras on the movie) is being hyped up a lot and i'm intrigued to see how that plays out. outside of the triangle, i love kourtney, carlos, ash, jet and maddox as characters. i'd probably just scroll thru hsmtmts twitter posts/tumblr tags to see the scenes/discourse/takes and use it to determine whether i'd watch or not. i've abandoned more shows (esp ongoing ones) than i have finished so... we'll see.

if you want me to be honest, gina is the reason i shipped portwell. in s1, the only person from the core four i truly rooted for was gina. i couldn't care less about ricky, nini and ej characters and plotlines (plus their weird 'love triangle'). i wouldn't call myself a rina in s1, but i was rooting for gina's character to be more vulnerable and possibly finding romance. she's this tough girl who's never really fit in because she had to move so much and i truly sympathized with her. in that homecoming scene with ricky, i actually did feel chemistry between them. now looking back, it's probably just sofia and joshua's acting that made that scene more that it actually was. but by the end of s1, it's clear rini was that season's endgame. i mean, the main plot of s1 was ricky being in the play to get nini back. i also believe they were going to be endgame if olivia hadn't left. and before anyone says s2 was filmed before driver's license and sour blew up, i know! but just think about it: with 'all i want' doing well and blowing up on tiktok the previous year and olivia working with a producer at interscope records (not under disney) for her new album since 2020, i think she was planning to move on to music before the script was written. hence ricky and nini's plotline for a 'final' breakup.

moving on to s2... in s2, i didn't like how in 2a gina's whole storyline was crying/pining over ricky who doesn't really reach out to her after the one exercise where gina rejects him. up to 205, i understood ricky might've been conflicted and confused about gina's feelings for him, he had his relatioship with nini and his family drama to worry about. but since that whole 'plane crash' scene pretty much checks out as a confession, it just didn't make sense for ricky to act the way he did in 205. after the whole "if you and i were dating..." thing he pulled, i could not ship rina at all. all the doors i had open for them, i shut. he was so out of line and so disrespectful. he only cared about nini in that scene (while also stepping over nini's boundaries about being in the play). and c'mon, this boy at least knows gina and him are at this weird stage where they aren't purely friends and there's feelings involved. so why would he say that? now, when i saw ej and gina's scene in the same episode, they got me immediately. and it all sort of aligned with their history and personalities—overconfident, 'anti-hero', ex-scheming partners. now that i think about it, i didn't like rina before i loved portwell. and portwell? well, i think they're neat. midgame ship this, plot device that, i don't really mind. i'm thankful for their development in 2b because it was a breath of fresh air for someone who loves and roots for gina. and ej grew on me, too. in s1 he was this straight up himbo disney villain for but in s2 he was given more dimension in his character, had relatable struggles and we were shown a more vulnerable and attentive side to him. my top reason for shipping pw is the fact they started becoming better people together and they got each other because of that. the whole 'new ej' and 'gina 2.0' thing was probably a happy accident, hence why tim didn't really dig further into that. but on the other hand, they're different in a lot of ways. gina wants to settle down in one place and ej doesn't know what he wants—we even find that he wants to break free from the mold his dad wants him to be. i wish that would be something they help each other out with—he is her constant and comfort and she's the person who grounds and challenges him. instead, it becomes a point where they fail (looking at you, s3!). and whether you are a rina/pw anti, there's no denying ej treated gina like a queen in s2. portwell in 205-210 will always have me by the neck. and even though 211 and 212 makes me recoil, i personally don't blame ej for tapping out from their date with the whole 'brother' thing. just like gina, he's scared of putting himself out there to get hurt.

now, s3. i like to joke about the fact that it didn't exist but honestly? minus the triangle, it was pretty entertaining and funny. i liked maddox's character a lot in particular, she reminds me of me. i loved that kourtney has a character arc. i love ej more after watching s3, he's become one of my fav characters. now, i don't know if i'll get booed for this by the pws but i wish pw would have not been a couple while gina is still in hs. not because of the whole age gap thing (which is ridiculous), but i genuinely think they'd suit that bff-to-lovers slow burn. thank god i have tsbu because the way tsbu!pw plays out is exactly how i imagined it would be. but alas, we see portwell deteriorate in s3. and ofc it was painful to witness but less so because they felt off to me. they weren't really the s2 pw i knew and loved. trust me i don't say this bc they broke up, i say it's the lack of banter and moments of vulnerability (which they should have more of bc they're a couple here!). also the ej caswell i know would've broken the rules and took gina as a date, honestly. like, he literally gave a girl food poisoning so he can star in a show with nini. now, i do believe that gina and ej being in different phases of their lives was a good reason for their breakup, she's got 2 years of hs left and his world is getting bigger than just hs. i mean, like i said before, i wished they'd have that two-year, slow-burn best friends-to-lovers arc. my biggest problem with ej and gina's story was the execution. there were hundreds of ways to write them being right person/wrong time and they'd still mean a lot to each other etc. i'd actually be okay with them ending. but with the whole 'i can't be a maybe anymore' and 'can it really be over, if it never got the chance to start?' rubs me the wrong way. it's like tim really wanted everyone to see that ej is at fault here (despite whatever tim's saying in interviews) when he's doing all of this so his girlfriend and his friends would 1) have a great summer in this place that's really important to him and 2) have this great opportunity to be on disney+, which is a huge deal. specifically, for gina, he wanted to make a good show bc we all know how much finally being casted as a lead is important to her. ej could've just walked away, given up and let this thing fall into shambles, but he didn't. it didn't just cost him time with gina, it costed him his whole summer. it was all weird writing for me. and as for rina? firstly, i find it odd that the rinas were rooting for gina emotionally cheating on ej. even sofia said that gina's not that type of girl and she genuinely wanted her and ej to work. personally, i didn't find ricky pining for gina cute at all. ik a lot of people see it as a parallel for season 2a when gina secretly pines over ricky while he's still with nini. but the context here is different now, isn't it? gina never received a confession (or any sort of sign ricky wanted to be around her) before she got with ej. in fact, ricky was busy with lily and was close enough with her to spend summer with her and her parents in florida?? like i don't know, it just feels like ricky's feelings stemmed out of nowhere which made it seem shallow and not the epic love tim is pushing it to be. again, sofia and josh are great actors, the wdykal scene had so much chemistry but it was just that. the context/history of rina is extremely shallow to me. they needed val to say 'yup, he's genuinely heartsick' instead of just letting josh's acting show it. another thing i should mention is the instances where ricky was so passive-aggressive about ej and gina. the part where jet ran off and they needed a hans to sing liaod with anna (gina), he was going to volunteer to step in because he had feelings for her and was visibly pissed off when cordon told ej to sub for jet. and there's ricky slapping ej, which was an ick moment bc it made him seem entitled rather than badass.

lastly, that one shot of him finding out nini was at camp? "nini's here?" yeah? that one scene had more emotional fuel than ricky spending the whole two weeks max crushing on gina. it sort of set back the whole rina development, i have to say it.

speaking of nini, her sendoff wasn't as satisfying as i expected it to be. in s3, i'd prefer it if she moved to california because she got a record deal or something? since s3 was already so meta, that would've been much better than her moving out to cali because her moms wanted to. back to s1, i feel like she was your stereotypical shy, main character with the usual 'gaining confidence' arc and that arc was sort of boring and overdone for me. but in s2 i really enjoyed her branching out to songwriting and stepping side to help out others. plus, i think people skip over how awful ricky was to her as well. first, he takes a break and feels entitled to get her back and second, he genuinely started suffocating the poor girl in s2. well, at least he realized it, though. again, when people say rini was toxic, it's really just ricky. nini did nothing wrong in s1-2. i don't think the rose song was even about ricky, he just made it into something it wasn't supposed to be. i sincerely hope ricky loses this behaviour in s4.

anyway! end of rant. these are just my thoughts. if anyone agrees or disagrees, it's up to them. i genuinely hope gina is happy next season, bc before i was a pw stan i was a gina stan (even though she was a little ooc in s3). if it means rina being happy, i won't be so mad. at the end of the day, this is just a silly disney show and it’s all for entertainment. i do love portwell but i rather tim never touch them again, honestly. canon pw is already ruined for me, though i wouldn't mind a proper portwell closure scene in s4.

that was a lot more words than i expected lmaoo, but if anyone read all of that, cool! if not, that's cool, too. it was very cathartic.