#eren: In your basement I grow cold
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joogios · 4 months ago
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Eren is Sun Bleached Flies, Zeke is Family Tree (Intro) and both of them are Strangers
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yandereshingeki · 1 year ago
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Milk, Honey, and Sugar
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Yandere Eren x Reader
Milk Honey and Sugar Masterlist
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Word Count: 12.7k
Content: College AU, Yandere content, Obsessive and Possessive behavior, Fluff, Smut, Dark content, Jiyuu beloved
Content Warnings: Stockholm Syndrome, Obsessive Behavior, Eren is a bit of a pervert, but somehow also shy about it, reader going thru it, Eren is described at taller than reader, Pet names (Angel, Baby), Dubcon (from stockholm syndrome), Eren is SO WEAK TO YOU, you’re both a bit shy, Reader is implied to be a tiny bit insecure, Tiddy sucking, Falacio, hand job, Little bit of subby! Eren but only a little, description of Eren’s dick lol, reader makes him CRY, mention of him pulling their hair a little, a smidge of edging, aftercare
Summary: After the realization hits that you aren't ever going to see your friends again, Eren is the one to comfort you—slowly turning you more and more dependent on him.
Oh my goddd It's been so long and I'm so sorry!!! A bunch of things got in the way of me writing for a while, but It's finally back! I'm going to try to focus on this series more so hopefully, there won't be such a big gap in posting again! I already have the next part nearly finished so it shouldn't be long before the next chapter! Also, I'd like to say thank you to anyone that's still here after my absence and anyone that's been here from before :,,) I'm so grateful. I hope this is enough to satisfy until the next chapter! There's a little doodle at the end for you all <33 Can't wait to write the most exciting parts of the story!! (In my opinion at least, lol) Please enjoyy
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Chapter 7: Warmth (part 1)
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The hours grew longer the more days you spent alone.
Your world was quiet, apart from the tick of the plastic analog clock or the occasional sound of water going through pipes and creaking footsteps from above. Being stuck on your own was such a lonely, stir-crazy existence. The only time you found solace from it was when Eren would make his way down the stairs, greeting you with his abnormally gentle smile and a soft kiss, giving you the company you constantly longed for and sometimes a consoling meal.
He had you wrapped around his finger by now, so tired of the isolation and quiet that you’d do almost anything if it meant he’d stay, just to ease your loneliness for a while. He was a distraction you took with little resistance because you didn’t want to think about the pain of being trapped for even a second.
He seemed to be the only thing that helped your ever-fragile mood, the one thing keeping you grounded as your mental stability frayed. It was hell when he would leave you, forcing you to face the cold basement alone again. You’d try to sleep through it, but sometimes your brain wouldn’t quiet and your emotions would explode to the point that you’d bawl your eyes out and sob until your nose was clogged and your head ached, your mind plagued with the overbearing thoughts of your long-gone friends and freedom. If they’d been looking, you were sure they would have found you by now. It should’ve been so obvious who’d taken you. Or maybe, everyone was too trusting of Eren to realize that deep down, he was an obsessive stalker, someone who kidnapped his best friend. 
Either way, your hope of being found had almost completely diminished. With no access to the outside world, you didn’t even know if a search was ongoing. You had no motivation anymore, even for escape—although it’s not like you could because Eren hadn’t let you go upstairs since your last attempt. He hadn’t touched you the same way he did that night either, occasionally letting his soft kisses grow more heated but never going as far as he did then. You almost missed it. The intimacy, that is. He’d been nothing but sweet to you most of the time, even when all you could do was cry into him.
You felt pathetic being in such a state, constantly switching between craving his presence and despising him for taking you away. You barely felt deserving of being rescued since you gave in to your captor so quickly. Would anyone even want to help you if they knew what you’d done with him? How close you’d remained even after his betrayal? It brought a sick feeling to your stomach whenever you thought about it. All of the lame excuses and blaming your actions on your once adolescent crush or your dwindling will to escape. You knew the truth, yet you still didn’t want to admit it.
It’d been four weeks since your failed escape, and just a little over a month of being stuck in the basement—not that you even knew the specifics of how long it’d been because of how your days began to blend. Since your attempt, Eren spent more time downstairs, sometimes taking his entire day off to stay with you, slowly making you more dependent on his presence because it was all you had. 
Akin to every other day, it started with his journey down, breakfast in hand and laptop under his arm, the device fully charged and ready for another day of playing offline games and watching videos or movies. But, also like every other day, his plans, per usual, were halted when he reached the bottom of the steps and saw you curled up on the bed, crying into your palms. 
His guilt overflowed whenever he saw you like that, but he pushed it away when he remembered all the things that could’ve happened if he hadn’t brought you here. All of the people that could have gotten to you, the things they could have done to you. It made him irrationally angry just thinking about it. In his house, you were safe, and he always knew where you were. To him, that was worth the pain it brought you.
Laying everything on the desk, he rushed to sit next to you, trapping you in his comforting arms and pulling you into his lap, “What’s wrong, baby?” 
He always asked that when you cried, always with the same pet names he’d use to try and ease your tears. You always replied that you didn’t want to discuss it, but he knew what the truth behind your sadness was. He knew it was because you missed everyone and you were terrified of telling him. 
“I don’t wanna talk about it right now.” You said, as usual, voice hoarse from tears that’d been pouring since you woke up. You put your head against him, soaking the white pajama t-shirt while he rubbed your back and cradled you like a child. His warmth and his pleasant autumn-like scent made it harder to focus on your problems, the comfort pulling you back to him in an instant. Sometimes it was like you were addicted, craving the constant reassurance of his presence and the distraction from your situation. 
This had become almost routine—he would come downstairs or wake up with you, find you crying, and drop everything to comfort you, just to continue whatever he had planned for the day after as if nothing happened. It was such an exhausting pattern for you, but he couldn't care less. All he cared for was being able to have you with him where you were safe. Being able to hold and touch you was just a bonus.
He held you as tight as he could, trying to make you feel secure while compressed in his arms. You could only snuggle into him, pushing your ear against his chest to listen to his racing heart. It was a calming and familiar white noise that helped distract you from the fact that you were probably never going to get out. It helped you feel sane and reminded you that Eren was another human too.
He sighed feeling you ease into him, finally safe enough to relax too. The room was quiet other than the gentle sounds of breathing and the mechanical ticking of the clock. It was almost peaceful like this, just the two of you cuddled up together. Listening to each other’s soft sounds and finding comfort in them.
“Can I have breakfast now?” You asked, your voice still crackling from your dry throat. You were sniffling and your face was still wet from past tears, but you were more hungry than upset now and didn’t want to wait for food anymore.
Eren smiled and slid you off his lap, making sure to plant a loving kiss on your forehead before he got up to grab the wooden breakfast tray from the desk. He walked back, setting it on your lap and revealing the stack of 4 heart-shaped pancakes to you that still radiated the warmth from being cooked. There was a tiny plate of butter and a cup of syrup sitting next to it, along with a ceramic mug of Eren’s favorite drink, his warm milk with honey and sugar mixed in. He always used to give it to you every time you came over, trying desperately to get you to favor it, and every time it always tasted bland. Not bad, but it didn’t fit your normal preference for drinks.
Recently though, whenever he’d give it to you with your breakfast, it was much sweeter than before. The milk and honey blended together with a pinch of dissolved sugar just tasted saccharine all of a sudden.
At first, you questioned if he spiked it, but when nothing happened after you drank it, you abandoned the idea. It felt so strange to suddenly enjoy something you’d been so indifferent about, but you didn’t want to overthink it. After all, you just wanted to enjoy the warmth from whatever he made you—to enjoy his warmth because it was all you had. 
“Well, are you going to eat?” Eren asked, questioning why you were staring at your food for so long.
Realizing that you’d spaced out while deep in thought, you muttered a quick “sorry” before grabbing the dull plastic knife on the tray to spread the butter over your pancakes.
While you were preparing your breakfast to your liking, Eren sat on the bed again, placing his arm behind you and sliding as close as he could without getting in your way, your thighs pressing together and his cheek almost touching your head.
He watched intensely as you cut into the syrup-soaked cake and stabbed into the small piece you separated, chomping down on it. As you chewed and swallowed it, he leaned his head on yours to get your attention, “Is it good? Did you like it?”
Nodding your head, you cut out another piece to shove into your mouth, “They’re really good! Did you make them from scratch?”
Eren smiled, feeling his heart melt when you gave him praise. He always ate up every little compliment you gave him, no matter how small it was. It was like a hit of dopamine every time you were even the tiniest bit nice—and he was addicted to it. Once he’d even kicked his legs and squealed into his pillow after you commented that he looked hot in a picture he posted, but that was a secret he would be taking to his grave.
“It’s my mom’s recipe… I just made them with a heart-shaped pan for the shape.” He replied, leaning into you and burying his face into the side of your neck while you continued to eat.
“I didn’t know you owned a heart-shaped pan,” You paused mid-bite, “When did that happen?”
“I got it when all of the Valentine's Day stuff was on clearance in stores… I just hid it in my room because I didn’t want anyone to see it while they were here.” He explained, his cheeks warming up at the thought of someone other than you seeing he owned such a bright pink and heart-shaped pan.
You giggled at his embarrassment and kept eating, enjoying the sweet syrup-soaked pancakes while you could. They were delicious, but especially warm compared to everything else, and you were so desperate to have that warmth that you were scarfing them down and barely savoring the taste. The sweet milk with honey came next, the most familiar part of the meal. You chugged it down so fast that you could feel its heat travel down to your stomach, officially ending your breakfast that morning.
It almost made you sad whenever you finished your food. You always felt extra cold after, especially without Eren there. It was never fun to experience.
“All done?” Eren asked, not allowing you a response before taking the tray from you. He placed it on the nightstand at the foot of the bed and went back to you, pushing you onto your back and crawling on top of you without warning. 
After taking a moment to maneuver himself around and get more comfortable, he placed his head on your shoulder and embraced you, the weight of his body crushing you into the mattress. It hurt a little and almost restricted your breathing, but having what was similar to a heated and weighted blanket on top of you was nice. 
He always did this when you finished your breakfast. It was one of his favorite things to do too. He loved being close to you, breathing in your scent and littering tiny kisses all over your neck and collarbone. It felt wonderful to claim you like that.
As you cocooned him with your limbs, he wriggled his way down until his head met your chest, putting his face between your breasts and squeezing you so they squished against his face. You let a gasp slip, face growing hot as a large smile formed on his lips. 
You tried to push against him to get him off, but you struggled immensely from his weight compared to your strength. It took almost all your energy to get him to budge, but he finally got the hint and sat up after minutes of your whining and squirming—only to grab your chest and squeeze as soon as his hands were free. 
You flinched and simultaneously gasped at the sudden grope, yelling at him with fake anger while batting his arms, “You’re such a fucking perv!” 
He chuckled and put his hand on the bed to lean down, his reddened cheeks so close to yours that you could feel his breath against your face, “Yeah, sure. But you love me, don’t you?”
You were silent while you considered what to say, afraid to lie to him but knowing that if you gave him any answer other than yes, he’d probably lose it on you. You did love him. You really did, but not in the way he wanted you to. You didn’t think you did, at least. He was just a safe space for you. A source of comfort while you were trapped. That didn’t mean you loved him, did it?
Growing insecure at your lack of response, Eren squeezed your arm just tight enough to regain your attention and asked you again, this time with more desperation lingering,  “Don’t you, angel?”
Without thinking it over more, you gave him an unconvincing answer, “Yes. I do.”
Satisfied with your response, he gave you a quick peck on the lips and got up to grab his laptop from the desk. You watched him carefully the whole time, sitting up and eyeing him as he picked up the small computer and carried it back to you. 
He placed carefully it in your lap, plopping down and leaning into you like he did during breakfast, his arm slung around your waist. You stared at the sticker-covered computer in your lap, your hands trembling while you considered asking him about going back upstairs again instead of spending another day in bed binging a random show you chose. 
You’d asked previously, even begged him to give you another chance, but his answer was always the same. He’d tell you that he isn’t ready for that, or that he doesn’t trust you yet. If you tried to ask repeatedly or beg for it, he would get angry with you and even lash out, leaving you alone for the entire day as a punishment, no matter how loud your cries got or how much it stung him to hear them. 
“Can I ask something before we start, Eren?” You managed to get out, your words shaking as you spoke.
You could feel him tense up next to you as you asked, his gaze now fixated on the laptop instead of you.
“What is it?” He asked, already knowing the answer. 
You opened your mouth to talk but stuttered so much trying to get the first word out that you had to pause again before talking.
“Can I go upstairs for the day?” You pleaded, quickly adding onto it so he couldn’t instantly deny you, “I’ll do anything you want! Please! I just… want to leave the basement for a while.”
Silence followed.
You were shaking, terrified of what he was thinking. He was staring at the floor, his brows furrowed as he ran through all of his options. He wasn’t angry, not yet at least. He only would be if you pushed for it too much, but he still hated having to answer that question. Why couldn’t you just be happy with what he gave you? He understood that you were bored and lonely, but it was still frustrating. It was so, so frustrating.
“I don’t know if I can trust you yet,” was all he could manage in response, because If he said any more or got too aggressive there would be tears. And he was so weak to your tears. It was the sole reason he always had to leave you when you cried to be let out. If he stayed, his already weak spirit might break, and then you could weave your way into having your way and escaping. He didn’t want to risk anything close to that.
Despite his effort to avoid it, tears began to prickle in the corner of your eyes, almost as if on command. You wanted to leave so badly that you were partially willing to give up your hope of escape if it meant you could at least have that. You would give all of it, just to have that ounce of freedom and self-autonomy back. 
“I don’t want to leave anymore, Eren! I promise! Chain my ankles or handcuff me to you, whatever!  Please, just let me go upstairs with you!” You begged. It was evident you were pushing his limit with the look that took over his face, but you didn’t know what else you could do to convince him.
Eren shut his eyes, the frown on his face deepening, “Baby, please. Don’t do this today.”
“Please, Eren. Please.” You begged again, the first fearful tear spilling over your cheek. The look you gave him was painful, his chest tightening the longer he stared at you. You’d done this almost every day for the last week and it was so aggravating. He hated being separated from you but you forced it on him by pleading so often.
He looked away from you and leaned forward, his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands as he snapped at you, “Why? Why do you want to so badly?! Can’t you just be happy with what I give you?” 
He finished with a sigh and waited quietly for your response, but nothing came. You were silent. 
It took Eren several moments to realize that you weren’t going to talk back, so when he finally lifted his head and looked at you, the sight ripped his heart in two.
You had your eyes squeezed shut and your mouth covered as you sobbed into it, trying to hide the sounds so you wouldn’t irritate him more, but seeing you cry like that with such obvious fear diminished any anger he had. He hated being the cause of your tears. He hated it.
Pulling you into his arms again and pushing the laptop aside, he apologized profusely and held you tighter. You whimpered into him, gripping his shirt while he pushed your face against his chest. 
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry… I’m sorry for snapping, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” He had his hand on your head, digging his fingers into your hair while he repeated his apology, “Please stop crying. Please, you know I hate hearing you cry.”
You hiccuped, holding your breath to choke down your tears. You held it in for a few more moments until you couldn’t anymore, taking an involuntary breath and sobbing into his shirt. In a poor attempt to silence it, you covered your mouth while you cried, quietly begging him not to leave you between sobs. It broke his heart. 
He tried to reassure you, hugging you tightly and petting your head while he cooed, “I won’t leave. I won’t leave this time.”
It took a while, but following a few violent hiccups, silenced sobs, and deep, difficult inhales, your tears were dissipating and you were calming down, clinging to Eren as if your life depended on it. 
He held you close, basking in your touch. He knew why you wanted to leave the basement. He was stupid to think that being trapped there would be enough for you, but after the last time he let you up, he was terrified that you’d try to leave again. If you ever did manage to get away from him, it would mean he’d lose everything, and he didn’t even want to think about that happening. 
You needed to stay with him, where you were safe. Where he could watch over you. But, it was clear you also needed at least a little freedom, otherwise, your mental state could deteriorate even more than it already had, and that would be just as bad as losing you through escape. He didn’t want to reduce you to a shell of your former self. He didn’t want to break you. He just wanted to keep you to himself.
Thinking it over some more while you were wiping your face on his shirt, Eren decided to go against his better judgment and give in to what you wanted, which was exactly what he had been trying to avoid. It was easier that way, considering you were both feeling awful about your situation.
“I’ll—I’ll take you upstairs. I’ll take you upstairs today.” He blurted out, sounding reluctant to say it out loud.
Your entire mood had changed from just that sentence, perking your head up so you could meet his eyes from where you sat on his lap. Eyes wide with excitement, they were lighting up more than they had in the month you’d been stuck there. It was nice for him to see. He’d missed that sparkle so much. 
“I’ll only let you come up if you follow my rules though, okay? If you break them I’m sending you back down and I won’t even think about letting you up for at least a year.” He aggressively added to his previous statement, wanting to be clear with what he expected of you so there wouldn’t be any complaints later.
You rapidly nodded your head, getting ready to agree to whatever he asked if it meant getting that slight sliver of freedom in the end. Lucky for you, he didn’t want to take advantage of your eagerness—not too much at least. He loved you too much to hurt you like that.
With a small sigh, Eren slid you off of his lap and took his laptop, holding out his hand for you after he got up. You took it with a large smile plastered on your face, pulling yourself onto your feet and practically skipping to the stairs because of how happy you were. He was slow to follow after you, not particularly joyful about letting you out of the safe haven he’d created for you, but still willing to if it meant he got to see your bright smile again.
Once he made it to the top, he was hesitant to unlock the door. He really didn’t want to let you out, but when he looked over and saw how excited you looked standing next to him, he couldn’t help but picture how upset you were just prior, and how quickly that changed when he said you could go upstairs. Keeping you locked up and to himself was already selfish enough, he didn’t want to keep suffering even more in a cold basement for his own benefit.
Before he went through the final step of opening the door, he grabbed your hand and squeezed it tight. He was trying to make sure you couldn’t just run off, but also trying to reassure himself that he was doing the right thing. With a final heavy sigh, he unlocked the door and turned the knob with his laptop under his arm, pushing it open and revealing the dim light of morning to you.
You tried to run, not with a hope to escape but more so out of excitement—but Eren was quick to pull you back to him and remind you of your place.
“Don’t forget what I told you.” He spoke sternly, the grip on your hand growing tighter to the point that it hurt. 
His rules—to behave. To do what he asked. From the first time he let you upstairs. The same rules that you broke the last time you were here, and not just because he was vague about what “behaving” meant. Of course, you couldn’t forget.
You sounded dejected as you looked at the creaky wooden floor, “I’m just… excited. Sorry.” 
Sighing, he sauntered forward while pushing you with him, taking the lead but ultimately doing what you wanted by going to the living room. 
Jiyuu got visibly excited when you walked into his view, his fluffy wings opening up slightly while he paced back and forth on the giant bird tree across the room, considering if it was worth it to fly over. 
Eren stopped in his tracks, a small smile brightening his face when he realized what the bird wanted. He always thought it was sweet that he liked you, despite parrots' common behavior of being possessive over their owner. It also made your integration into his home a lot easier, so he wouldn’t have to worry about the bird going after you whenever he was affectionate with you.
“Why don’t you go pick him up?” He asked, trying to push you forward, closer to Jiyuu. 
Excited to see the bird—a living creature other than Eren—but terrified of doing something wrong and being punished for it, you turned to look at him, asking for reassurance that this wasn’t a trap, “Are you sure?”
“Yes. I’m sure. I won’t be mad at you for walking away from me this time.” He assured you, the hand on your back pushing you even further, harsher this time to the point you almost stumbled.
You stepped forward with hesitance, slowly gaining confidence the closer you got to Jiyuu, your saving grace from complete isolation with Eren. Watching carefully, Eren stayed behind, his gaze burning holes into the back of your head. It made you so nervous, his eyes fixated on your every move. Being watched so closely was highly unpleasant and anxiety-inducing, and you could tell that Jiyuu didn’t like it either.
Climbing onto you when you held your arm out, Jiyuu was quick to run to your shoulder and puff his feathers up, squawking loudly at Eren. He’d never been especially protective of you, nor aggressive towards Eren, so this behavior was completely new—at least to you. It was especially shocking because of how loud he was able to scream, the sound triggering a constant ringing in your ears. 
“Eren? What’s wrong with him?” You panicked, turning to see what the bird was so upset about that he had to shriek, only to be face-to-face with Eren. His knees bent slightly so he met your height, startling you even more when you unexpectedly met his piercing green pupils.
His eyes were glued to the bird, his hand lifted in front of him so he would step up from your shoulder. To your surprise, the bird nipped at his hand and chewed on it, stepping on it when he was finished and acting like he hadn’t just screamed at him. “He’s just being moody. Don’t mind it too much, he just gets like this sometimes, ‘specially when I’m not in the best mood. He can tell.”
As he put Jiyuu back on the tree stand to chew on more of his toys, he walked closer and wrapped his arm around you, practically forcing you into his chest with his laptop pressed against your back. When his other hand was free from the bird’s talons, it joined his other to squeeze you tightly, keeping you close as he leaned over you, inhaling the comforting scent from your skin and hair.
You returned the hug, trying to distract yourself from the sinking feeling you had in your chest when he implied that he wasn’t in a good mood. It was obvious it was because of you—because you wanted to go upstairs. It made you feel so guilty, but also so afraid. He could be unpredictable when he was upset, which is probably why Jiyuu didn’t like it either.
“Why don’t we just watch some TV for now? Since he’s in such a bad mood and I still want to laze around…” He spoke up, backing away but leaving little space between you and him.
Without a thought, you nodded, ready to agree to almost anything as long as it would improve his mood and keep you out of your personal hell known as the basement. With your compliance, he was quick to drag you back onto the couch, setting the laptop down on the coffee table and pouncing, crushing you under his weight. Your whines went ignored by him in favor of grabbing the remote to activate the TV, bringing up the news before he swiftly changed it to an on-demand streaming service. He put on one of your favorite shows—one you’d already watched, probably dozens of times since you’d come here—and threw the controller
down, burying his face into your chest and engulfing you in his arms.
Resting your hands on his back when you finally processed everything he’d sped through in seconds, you focused more on him than the TV, although only able to see the top of his head and his messy bun. His face was buried between your boobs again, except this time, instead of smiling and teasing you about it, he shut his eyes and eased into you, feeling secure enough to relax with you trapped underneath him. The shift in mood was apparent, but all you could think to do was run your hands through his hair, hoping that would soothe him enough to think about letting you stay upstairs more often. 
It was silent after that, besides the background noise of the TV playing and Jiyuu preening his feathers and chewing wood. You were both clinging to each other, unmoving and resting. Eren was so warm, it almost made you tired—but you didn’t want to sleep. Not when you were finally experiencing what you’d wanted so badly for weeks. You longed to walk around and explore the house more, but he probably wouldn’t let you. It was frustrating.
“Eren?” You said, trying to get his attention on you instead of whatever he was thinking about in the silence.
He hummed in reply, not bothering to lift his head because he was too comfortable with his face against your chest. 
You twirled some of his loose hair between your fingers, silently trying to persuade him as you asked, “Can we go to your room? I want to see more than just your living room and kitchen.” 
Before you could continue with your long-winded speech trying to convince him to let you go to a different part of the house, he interrupted you with a finger over your lips, letting out a muffled “mm-mm” while he shook his head that was still against your chest. You frowned, moving his finger away from your mouth and continuing to push, “Why not?”
A scowl took over his face as he peered up at you, his chin stabbing into your sternum when he replied with aggressive venom in his tone, “Because I said no. Drop it.”
Once you nodded, a look of stinging fear glazing your eyes, his expression relaxed and he put his face back into your chest. Although your response calmed him, his answer did nothing to satiate your curiosity. You’d been in his room a few times prior to the kidnapping, so what was so different about now?
You let out a small sigh, continuing to run your hands through his hair but turning your attention towards the TV that still played your favorite show, although you’d begun to get rather tired of it after watching it over and over so much. Especially now, when watching different shows and dramas was all Eren had let you do aside from occasionally letting you play games on his laptop. As relaxing as the routine used to be, it was starting to grow excruciatingly dull. There were only so many days you could do nothing but laze around before you grew tired of it.
“Eren.” You began again, desperate for something to entertain you. You didn’t want to spend all your time out of the basement doing the same thing you did in it.
With a quiet groan, he lifted his head again and frowned, “What now?”
“I’m bored… I want to do something other than watch TV.”
Realizing that you weren’t trying to annoy him about getting into his room again, his eyes softened and he replied with a sweeter tone, “Like what?”
“I don’t know. You have games, don’t you?”
“In my room, yeah. But I don’t want you going in there right now and I’m not leaving you alone to grab anything.”
“Then what else can we do?”
When you asked, his brows scrunched together and he averted your gaze, deep in thought. You watched carefully, worried that he would become irate if you were too talkative while he was trying to relax. 
Slowly, his cheeks darkened as an idea popped into his head—one he’d usually tried to push away so that he wouldn’t risk making you feel uncomfortable with your already fragile emotional state, but right now? You seemed to be in a better mood, and much more content with doing just about anything to ease your boredom. There was nothing to stand in the way of his selfish desires.
Noticing the way his former annoyance bloomed into a red-faced fluster, you grew worried and tried to turn his head so he’d look at you, only for him to avoid meeting your eyes. His cheeks were burning hot to the touch and you could tell he had something on his mind.
“What’s wrong?” You tried to ask calmly despite the tremble in your voice, mentally preparing yourself for whatever emotion he might reply with.
A silent pause followed, and he barely managed to stutter it out, his hesitancy to explain his thoughts holding the words back, “I thought of something we could do if you are really that against just watching TV, but—but it’s kind of lewd. It’s—It’s really lewd actually.”
You could feel your cheeks grow warm at all the things that could mean, quietly urging him to continue out of curiosity about his desire, “Yes…? What is it?”
He was quiet again before he met your eyes, replying with a faltering voice full of anxiety, “I was thinking that maybe… we could take turns touching each other, and we could—I could learn more about your body… and we could make it into a game, I guess? If you really want to, the person who finds the most sensitive spots on the other person could win. That would make it more fun, right? Would something like that interest you more than TV?”
He stared at you with pleading puppy eyes while awaiting your response, his pupils swallowing his irises that practically glowed as they peered into your soul. 
Your entire face burned hot, now matching his. You were like shy kids confessing to each other, so tense and unnerved. 
Speaking with an unfamiliar kind of softness in his voice, he sounded like he would explode with embarrassment if you didn’t respond well, “We don’t have to, but I just—I just really want to touch you again. Even without the ‘game’ part. I’ve missed it. A lot.” 
He felt so perverted just saying it out loud.
His offer was tempting, but you didn’t know if you could trust it. Your judgment had felt so clouded recently and you’d been giving into him more under the guise of gaining enough freedom to escape, but how much would you need before you tried to leave again? The thought of escaping was crossing your mind less and less, and you were growing used to being with only Eren all the time, getting dangerously close to enjoying it. 
Part of you was terrified of ever leaving, terrified of how your friends would react when they found out what you’d already let him do to you, and terrified of leaving what you’d just started becoming accustomed to—but another part of you was terrified to stay. If you did, how far would things go? How deep of a hole would you dig for yourself before it was too late to get out?
“We don’t have to!” He repeated, pulling you out of your thoughts, “I could just find something else for us to do if you don’t want to,”
“It’s okay! It’s fine, it’s fine. We can do that.” You blurted out without processing what you were saying. The last thing you wanted was to upset him, so satisfying him was the only option even if it went against your better judgment. You could deal with the guilt later, but right now you had to focus on keeping his trust. Besides, it wouldn’t hurt to give in and have a little fun with someone you’d trusted while you could, take advantage and get the experience you missed out on years before. You’d rather it be him than a stranger. That’s what you told yourself, at least.
“Really? Are you sure?” He asked again to reassure your consent while his lips shifted into a sly smile.
No. You weren’t. But you’d already made your bed, and you’d rather lie in it than rip off the sheets and start from the beginning, “Yeah. I am.”
There was a small moment of silence, the two of you staring at each other before he jumped off of the couch, swiftly making his way to the tree where Jiyuu was. He was quick to take his feathery friend to his cage, closing the door and covering it with the blanket he’d normally only use for him at night. Despite the bird's clear displeasure of being put to bed early, showcased through his sad-sounding caws as the cage was locked, he left the cover on and returned to you on the couch, towering over you with half-lidded eyes and a beet-red face.
“Uh, could you get on my lap when I sit down?” He asked timidly, placing a hand on your shoulder. 
You responded by nodding and sliding to the side, allowing him to sit while he dragged you onto his lap to straddle him.
Once again, it grew quiet. You were looking at anything but each other, the awkward tension making it difficult to keep eye contact. You were both used to intimate actions, but not intimate words, so anything you thought of saying fell short before it could leave your lips. 
It felt like you were fumbling teenagers again, lacking experience and not knowing where to begin—although Eren was the only one of you who had any to begin with. The most you had under your belt was some awkward and sloppy kissing between you and your short-term ex-boyfriends from high school, but he didn’t know that.
“Since this is a game… Do I get anything if I win?” You asked first, trying to break the ice and guarantee at least something good would come out of this.
You watched the cogs turn in Eren’s head for a moment before he responded, trying to figure out how to word it so that you didn’t request anything unreasonable after his answer, “I guess you can have something… Just tell me what, as long as it doesn’t have anything to do with leaving.”
It only took you a minute to decide what you wanted, the idea popping into your head rather quickly when you thought about what he would actually be willing to give, “Can I go in your room?”
He sighed hearing your response, a cross glare in his eyes while he reluctantly acceded, “Fine, but only if you A, win, and B, give me until tomorrow to clean it.”
The excitement you had grew rapidly, but just as it peaked, it dissipated when you remembered what you would have to do to get your reward, and the fact that it wasn’t guaranteed in the first place. The small smile that’d grown on your face faded once you realized it, and then the pressure ramped up once again.
“So…” He finally began, a short pause holding him while his eyes drifted down to your chest, his hands landing on your hips where he rubbed small circles into them with his thumbs, “Where should we start?”
You were both anxious, but he was the only one trying to hide it. His hands were shaking, but he tried to mask it with subtle movements down your plush thighs. He wanted to touch you. He wanted to feel all of you and run his hands over your entire body—but he wanted to make sure you wanted it too. He needed you to want it too.
“Wherever you want,” you replied, too nervous to say much else. His hands felt like fire against your cold skin, the feeling of them gliding over your body making your cheeks boil. 
His fingers grazed down to your knees and back up your body, stopping just below your chest to speak quietly, “I want to touch you everywhere though.” 
It was obvious what he wanted to do, but was too nervous to do it. His brows scrunched together while he stared at your chest, sunken in thought. The sight almost had you giggling from how silly he looked like that, so deeply focused on your breasts. To try and urge him forward and get past both of your anxieties, you slowly intertwined your fingers with his, leading his hands up to grope you.
His eyes flicked up to you as he made contact with your chest again, his gaze relaxing and eyes lighting up as they stared into yours. You looked so pretty in your current position, sitting on his lap with your cute thighs squished against him, your hands covering his, and your gorgeous eyes shying away from his stare. 
“Can I kiss you? Please?” He asked, leaning in so close that you could feel the heat radiating off of his crimson face while he squeezed you.
Letting out a small squeak from his grip, you decided to skip the verbal reply and gently pushed your lips against his, your noses bumping awkwardly because you were hesitant to do anything that could deepen the kiss further. Despite this, Eren missed the cue and tilted his head to the side, trying desperately to interlock your lips and part yours.
His groping grew rougher as he relaxed, fingers touching your nipples through the thin shirt you wore, the fabric barely shielding how hard they were growing. Your face was burning while he felt you up, sweat beading on your forehead when something stiff pressed against your crotch. 
It was so warm. Everything about him was warm. His body, his demeanor, even his smell. It was all so warm compared to the cold you always felt. Even before he took you away, it was always cold. But he was so warm.
“Eren…” you mumbled into his lips, your pulse rising and your arms falling over his shoulders.
He pulled away for a moment, face still inches away from yours, “What is it?”
“You’re warm.”
You could feel him chuckle as you said it, responding with “So are you.”
He kissed you again, this time carefully pushing his tongue between your lips in a way that was less than forceful and moving one of his hands to the back of your neck to hold you there. His touch sent tingles up your spine, your body melting into his hands. It was like your integrity burned away when he was close, and you couldn’t help but crave more.
Eren’s other palm slipped under your shirt, sliding up your stomach and squeezing your bare breast before lifting the fabric further. Your body tensed again, suddenly growing anxious at the thought of him seeing your chest nude. It’s not like he hadn’t before, but it was only now that it felt so nerve-wracking. You couldn’t pinpoint why, but now the thought made your heart race.
When he finally pulled his face away from yours, giving you time to breathe, it was only so he could pull your shirt over your head and throw it aside. Following that, his mouth was back on yours and he was reaching for your chest again—but this time, you stopped him. You took your arms off his neck to cover yourself, anxiety pulsing at the thought of him looking at you more. You didn’t feel this way the other times you’d been nude around him, so why were you so nervous now? Everything was burning all of a sudden, and it almost made you feel sick.
“Hey, is something wrong?” Eren questioned in his sweetest voice, attempting to quell your sudden fear by backing off to cup your cheek, his other hand resting on your thigh. You tried to look him in the eyes, but your stomach sank when you met them. His irises were the brightest, most intimidating green that made your heart ache, you couldn’t stand to stare. 
“I’m—I’m kind of scared.” You stammered, staring down at his hand while his thumb rubbed small circles into your skin.
His brows furrowed as he overthought what you said, “Just… all of a sudden? It wasn’t like this before, why now?” 
He didn’t mean to seem angry, but his expression showed the opposite. So, feeling pressured with a slight tinge of fear in your eyes, you quietly apologized and began to uncover yourself, afraid of upsetting him and causing any harm that might get you sent back downstairs. He stopped you immediately, grabbing your wrists and holding them so your arms still covered you. 
“Don’t apologize… It’s fine if you don’t want to.” He reassured, reaching to grab your shirt beside him on the couch, “I don’t want to do anything if you don’t want to.”
Sadness laced his tone, his expression matching it as he pulled the garment over your head. It wasn’t because you were hesitant to go further with him, you knew that, but your heart hurt to see him making such a face. So sad, even with the tiny smile on his lips that was meant to reassure you. It was more than just wanting to stay upstairs. You wanted to make him feel happy. Even if you felt guilty about how you would do it.
“No, no, Eren…” You stopped him from pulling the shirt down, pushing it back over your chest while you wiped your watering eyes with your other arm. “It’s—It’s not that. I'm just—I’m—So nervous.” 
“What are you nervous about?” He asked, trying to avoid the temptation of looking at your now bare torso while he addressed the issue at hand. 
“I don’t know,” you started, mentally going through the list of things that were making you anxious to find something to say other than the truth about the shame you felt, “This is just… a lot different than the last few times you’ve seen me naked. You’re so close so you’re going to see… everything.”
“I don’t care what they look like. The only thing I care about is that it’s you.” He grabbed your hands and squeezed them, cheeks blazing red as he leaned close to you to confess, “You’re perfect to me. So perfect.”
Your heart began to swell again, this time for a different reason. 
He always made you feel so wanted, even before he took you away, his words like a warm blanket around your needy heart. It almost had you crawling into his hold, with no intention of ever leaving. No one ever praised you like he did, so maybe that’s why it had such a large effect on you. You were so susceptible to it that it was dangerous to your escape, constantly tiptoeing the line between enjoying the praise and falling face-first into Stockholm syndrome. It was a dangerous game you were playing, and without even realizing, you were losing. 
“Can… you touch me again?” You asked quietly after letting his praise marinate in your head for a minute, prying your hands out of his to pull your shirt over your breasts again. 
Shocked by your sudden switch-up, his eyes widened for a moment before he awkwardly nodded while placing his hands on your waist, finally letting his eyes trail down to your breasts.
Seeing them so close sent blood rushing not only to his face, but also down under, his already semi-hard on pushing uncomfortably against his pants. He wanted to brand them with his bites and kisses, cover them in his spit, and bruise them with hickeys to claim them as his. He was opposed to rushing you though, so all he could do was drag his hands up your torso until they finally cupped around your soft flesh, squeezing lightly just to confirm that he was really touching you and that it wasn’t just another wet dream.
You squeezed your eyes shut, trying to repeat his reassurances in your head while he fondled you. His normally cold hands were warm against your skin, squishing and playing with your chest and making your already hot body feel like it was burning. 
He was pushing them together, bouncing them, and holding them in his palms. It was so embarrassing, but you were trying desperately to keep it together. When you finally brewed up enough confidence to pry your eyes open, you saw how happy he looked, as silly as it was, and it took everything inside of you not to let out a giggle that could’ve embarrassed him. You wanted him to keep enjoying himself, even if your face burned from the awkwardness of it.
But just as you were growing used his hands on you, he threw a question at you that hit like a brick to the face, draining every ounce of courage out of you in a split second, “Can I… suck on them?”
He was leaning towards your chest as he spoke, looking up at you with anticipating eyes that made another wave of intense heat flare through your face. You were barely getting used to his fondling, but to suck on them? You might faint. With no experience except your own fingers and numerous toys, you didn’t even know how sensitive your nipples could be. The thought of squirming around in his lap while he lapped so leisurely on your tits made you shiver. But at the same time, it also piqued your curiosity and made the warmth between your thighs grow. You couldn’t help but wonder what it would feel like.
“Yeah. Sure. That’s—That’s fine. Just—be gentle, ok? No one’s ever done that to me before…” You replied with a shaking voice, brows pushed together with worry while you avoided eye contact.
“Why wouldn’t I be?” He asked rhetorically, hungry eyes still gazing up at you as he leaned towards your chest. He broke his stare to pull your shirt up and off again, cupping your breasts and latching onto one of your nipples like it was all he was born to do. 
You winced in response, anxious to experience the feeling for the first time. Just having your sensitive bud in his mouth felt so different, so warm and wet—so when he took a long, slow lick, you couldn’t stop the whimper that left your throat. 
He almost lost his composure right then when he heard that noise. It was amazing, like a slice of a heavenly melody he wanted to keep locked in his brain forever. He wanted more of those sounds. He needed more of them.
With your other breast cupped in his palm, he started to pinch and nudge the bud while he sucked softly on the one in his mouth. You were already letting out more quiet whines, holding the back of his head while your fingers tangled in his hair. You couldn’t even begin to explain the burning pleasure that rippled from your chest to your core or the throbbing ache that proliferated between your thighs. It felt so much better than you imagined, and as much as you didn’t want to admit it, Eren being the one to do it made your heart race. 
Desperate to pry more sounds from you, his intensity rose by the minute, lips tugging on your nipple and fingers pinching the other. As more soft whines and moans spilled from your mouth, your spine arching to push your chest further into his face, he could feel the stiffness in his pants painfully begging to be freed. You sounded beautiful, he just wanted to throw you onto the couch and fuck you senseless while you cried out. Holding back from that was so hard, especially with all the cute noises you were making. He wanted to take you right here, but he knew he’d have to be patient if he didn’t want you to feel rushed or forced. He needed to be like a wolf stalking its deer. Slow, calculated, determined.
Pulling away from your mound, he looked at your swollen, spit-covered bud, smiling to himself with newfound confidence while moving to your other one. His possessive feelings were growing with each mark he left on you, every new blemish claiming another piece of your body for himself. Once he had all of you, god knows how he’d act.
He had one arm around you, pushing you closer to him to make it easier for him to swallow your chest while his hands groped your ass and felt up the wet spot between your legs, just barely tugging at the hem of your shorts when the opportunity arose. He was sucking hard, running his tongue diligently over the nipple and flicking it repeatedly to steal more moans from you. Every noise, every whimper, and every whine was just more motivation to him, fueling his excitement to keep touching you and eventually have you touch him. He almost couldn’t take it anymore, the bulge in his pants becoming increasingly painful the longer this went on.
It seemed he finally snapped after a few more minutes of vigorous sucking and quiet whimpers, grabbing your arms and forcing his face away from your chest after he heard you whisper out his name. As much as he wanted to continue the petting, he needed to have you now or he might just burst. 
“Fuck whatever stupid idea I had for a game, I need you to touch me. I need you to touch me now, please.” Eren begged, sounding more desperate than you’d ever heard him before, almost growing teary-eyed at how pent-up he was becoming. His hips were roughly grinding into yours, praying for anything to rub against or release his tension. He was so frantic that you thought he might get on his knees and beg if you said no.
If you were being honest with yourself, you were curious. You wanted to know what he felt like and how he would react. You wanted to revel in the feeling of being desired so badly.
“You want me to touch you… that bad?” You asked, your voice quivering from the intense feeling rumbling through your body that you could only describe as heavy. Without Eren’s support, you would probably collapse into a hot mess on the couch.
Eren’s eyes grew wide as if you were spouting nonsense in a language he didn’t understand, “Of course I do! Why the hell do you think we’re here in the first place? I’ve never wanted anything so badly!”
His hands were shaking out of frustration, his grip strong enough to leave marks. Though, when the fear gleamed in your eyes and your muscles tensed up, he was quick to calm, loosening his hold and sliding his hands down to hold yours instead.
“I’m… I’m sorry, I’m just… so, so desperate. I want you so badly,” He apologized, looking down to avoid shameful eye contact with you, “I need you. Badly.”
You stared at him quietly for a moment, playing around with the ideas in your head before deciding through your lust-clouded judgment that you wanted him too. In the moment, you didn’t care if you would regret it later. You just wanted to touch him. You wanted to have control over him, if only for a little while.
For once, you were the one to make the first move, leaning forward and placing a soft kiss on his forehead while you reached your hand to his groin. His entire body stiffened as you put your hand on the tent in his pants, his cheeks flushing when he peeked up at you with that desperate look in his eyes.
“Please—Please be gentle. Don’t squeeze it too much, I don’t—know how much I can take…” He stuttered out as if the fabric holding his cock back hurt any less than you squeezing him too tightly would.
Nodding, you caressed him again, watching carefully as his eyes squeezed shut and he leaned back, uttering a soft moan from your hand on the underside of his cock. He was still tense, but you could see that he was enjoying your touch, so you carried on. Beginning gently, you cupped him through the thin fabric of his pajama pants and massaged your hand up and down his pulsing shaft, eventually moving to tug at the band around his waist to silently ask permission to free him from his confines. 
Although you wanted to take it slow, you were also desperate to see and touch him without the barrier separating you; and it seemed like he was too. That much was evident when he didn’t bother to let you pull his pants or boxers down, ripping them off himself and leading your hand back to his freed shaft by your wrist.
Catching on quickly, you tightened your hand around him and eyed up his length, examining it while he went back to gasping at every little movement you made. He was a lot bigger than you expected him to be up close, not to mention how heavy he felt in your palm. Seeing all of the little things you hadn’t noticed previously, it looked so different too. 
Veins crawled up from the bottom of his girth, stopping a few inches before reaching his head, and he was swollen and red at the tip, already leaking precum. His bush was well-trimmed, a tiny freckle at the base of it, and it curved upwards while it twitched in your hand. You never thought you’d see a dick that looked so… perfect. Just holding his weight in your hands had you clenching around nothing, the thought of it filling you up passing through your mind more than once.
You slowly moved your hand up, stopping with your thumb on the underside of where his head and shaft met. You’d read online about men being sensitive in that spot, and it appeared to be true by the way his breath hitched when you ghosted your digit over it. Curious, you pressed lightly and caressed the spot up and down, causing his hips to jolt unexpectedly while a louder gasp left his throat. 
“Ohh my god. Oh my god.” He breathed out, pushing his elbows into the cushions behind him to grip the couch beneath his thighs more efficiently. He’d never felt this good, even with his other, more experienced flings in the past. Even with less skill and precision, you were just so much better.
You were you. His dream. Everything he’d ever wanted in life. That’s what you were. His most prized possession, his most important person. That alone made everything feel superior. Because it was you doing it.
Enjoying the erotic look on his face, you kept up your motions and continued to stroke the spot below his head, sending him into a frenzy of squirms and whimpers as he grew overstimulated just by the pad of your thumb. His hips bucked up, desperate to get more friction to tip him over the edge of his already approaching orgasm.
“Fuck—Fuck, you have no idea how good this feels.” He uttered under his breath, voice shaking as you rubbed even faster. His whimpers were high-pitched, turning into something more akin to whines as he neared the end; but just as he was reaching the hilt of his pleasure, you pulled your hand away, leaving him to cry and plead for your touch again. 
Seeing him so desperate for it was such a change from his usual self. It was like the roles swapped, and now you were the one that had him wrapped around your finger. You never wanted it to end. You longed to keep what little control over him you had for as long as you could. Plus, he looked cute when he was the one tomato-faced and begging.
Leaning close, you kissed his jaw while he audibly sniffled, reaching up to put your hand behind his head and push it forward to kiss his forming tears away. He whimpered again, one hand clawing the couch while the other flew to your hip. You pecked his face, slowly trailing to his lips so you could kiss, fully entrapping him in the scheme forming in your head. 
Your fingers wrapped around his shaft for a second time, shocking him into pulling away before you pushed your lips against his again, assertive about keeping his mouth against yours. He was already moaning into you, grip growing tight as you began moving your hand up and down his length.
He was practically melting underneath you, arms trembling as your hand worked his hardness, pumping it rapidly. His cries for you were only growing louder, turning into muffled chants about how close he was to finishing. You loved to hear it, but you knew you didn’t want it to end so soon.
Once again, you let go of him, moving off of his lap and taking a seat next to him on your knees while he whined about your second absence. However, his complaints ceased when he realized what you were doing, your head already moving closer to his length and your hand taking its place at the base of it. 
“Wait, wait,” He panicked, trying to stop you, reaching forward to grab some of your hair and pull your head away, “Are—Are you sure you want to do that? It doesn’t taste as good as you might think.”
Your mouth changed from its open “O” into a pout, a frown taking over your features as he stopped you from finishing him off, “I know what I want, Eren. Please let me.”
With your familiar longing gaze piercing his, he was quick to give in and remove his hand from your head, thanking the lord that he held the motivation to wash himself regularly and make sure he was clean every time he interacted with you. Right now you wanted him almost as much as he wanted you, and if you were so certain about it then he wasn’t about to stop that. He needed to take his chance to savor it because god knows how long he’d wanted this and when he'd get another chance. You finally wanted him too, so it would be foolish to stop now.
“Just… don’t push yourself.” He muttered, running his hand down your back while you resumed what you were doing before.
You nodded with a quiet hum, placing a gentle kiss on the head and taking an experimental lick just below. Tracing the pad of your finger up and down his veins, you took in all of the little shudders you managed to coax out of him and began a trail of kisses down the underside of his length. The way he was almost pouting with embarrassment while his cheeks were such a deep shade of red was adorable, it just made you want more. You wondered if this was how he felt about you most of the time, so enamored that he couldn't think about anything other than your face.
Reaching the base with your pecks, his cock twitching every time you made contact, you stuck out your tongue and pressed it against him. Slowly and tediously, you dragged it back up to the top, leaving a trail of saliva in your wake while Eren bit back a whine. A few more frivolous kisses to the tip and you finally took him into your mouth, pushing your tongue against him while you lowered your head as much as you could without gagging.
Lifting your head, you peered up at him, studying his face while you tried to force more into your mouth, unable to fit more than a few inches before tears emerged in the corners of your eyes. He was so big, you could barely get anything in, but that didn’t seem to affect the amount of pleasure it gave him when you finally began bobbing your head. Eren was already turning into a mess again, but the second you started moving the hand on his shaft in rhythm with your mouth, he nearly broke down crying from the feeling. 
Tracing shaky hearts on your back, he stared down at you, trying to burn the image he saw into his memory and lock it away for safekeeping. It was exhilarating to see you like this, so much so that he had to cover his mouth to prevent the moans that slipped out from growing too loud. He couldn’t handle it, especially after being edged twice, he was going to go crazy if you didn’t let him finish this time. 
Holding himself still was the most difficult thing, especially when all he wanted to do was hammer into your throat like there was no tomorrow—but he didn’t want to make you choke on him. Not yet, at least. It felt too early to be that rough with you. 
Being built up and denied satisfaction the last two times meant it wasn't long before the band was stretched again, dangerously close to breaking. The way your tongue pressed against the sensitive spot below his head, the way your fingers curled around him and stroked everything that didn’t fit in your mouth had him gasping for air. It was driving him up the wall, pushing him so close that he could feel himself at the very edge, nearly tumbling over it even if you weren’t the best at what you were doing. 
When your eyes flicked up to meet his, watching his ruby-red and sweat-slicked face twisted with pleasure, he finally snapped. You watched his eyes squeeze shut as he threw his head back, crying out in whimpers as he lost control of his hips through his orgasm, repeatedly chanting “I love you” between swears.
You couldn’t help but gag as more than you could handle was shoved down your throat, eyes going wide as your mouth was coated with a bitter taste that made you wince. You had to pull away while he was still coming, coughing and gagging more at the feeling of his release in your throat while the rest spilled over your hand.
Eren was apologizing under his breath, still struggling through the pleasure of his climax—but you decided to push him the slightest bit further as revenge for making you choke, massaging your finger over the same spot you had earlier and sending a shock through his entire body again. You continued to touch him as you sat up, leaning into him with your head on his shoulder so you could feel the way he shook from the overstimulation. 
“Please—Please, oh my god I can’t take it.” He cried, tears bordering his eyes as you teased him. Seeing that you didn’t want to go too overboard, you decided to give him mercy and let go, watching him go limp as his body finally relaxed. He was panting, covered in sweat like he’d just finished one of the intense basketball scrimmages you used to watch him do, even though he’d only gotten sucked off and pleasured. It was almost cute to you, mostly because it made it much more obvious how much of a hold you had on him, and you enjoyed it. You enjoyed being desired.
  Following a few minutes of quiet, filled only with sounds of his panting and shuffling of you snuggling against his arm, he spoke up again through pants, slowly coming back into his normal headspace that was dedicated to caring for you, “Was… Was that okay? Are you doing okay?”
Your eyes half-lidded while you stared at him from his shoulder, you nodded with a smile spreading across your lips. The bliss of everything was still holding onto you, the giddy feeling that bubbled in your chest stemming from the moments prior. You just wanted to stay like this, cuddled up against him while you relaxed together in sweet silence, only broken occasionally by your back-and-forth comments about aftercare and gentle kisses to his collarbone.
When Eren finally decided to get up, still so delirious from the pleasure that he hadn’t even thought about how you were out of sight, it was only to grab a rag and some water from the kitchen. Then was back on the couch as quickly as he’d left, tidying you up and pulling you into his lap to cradle you. While you clung to him, burying your face into his neck, he leaned forward to grab your shirt from the floor, quickly pulling it over your head so you could get back to cuddling. 
You were feeling oddly clingy, more so than before. You just wanted to stay in his arms, snuggled up to his warm body. It was the most at peace you’d felt since you’d been taken. It felt nice. 
Suddenly pulling you out from your comfort, Eren pushed your face away from his neck, eliciting a whine from you as he grabbed the glass of ice water and brought it up to your lips, “Come on, you should drink. I know that I probably didn’t taste very good…”
Pouty about being pulled away, you snapped back playfully with a raised brow while pushing the glass away, “How would you know what you taste like?” 
His face twisted in embarrassment, his brows furrowing as he stammered trying to explain himself, “Well, I don’t, but I’ve just—I’ve been told it doesn’t taste very good.”
You giggled at his response, “That doesn’t mean you don’t taste good to me,” even though it was true that he tasted rather foul.
Slightly flustered, Eren quickly tried to regain control of the conversation, feigning confidence while placing his hand on your nape to push your face close to his, “Well why don’t you let me have a taste for myself so I can see?”
“Mm, how am I supposed to do that?” You asked.
“Like this.” He replied, pushing his lips against yours and dipping his tongue into your mouth before pulling away just as quickly, leaving you stunned at his sudden shamelessness.  
While you were still staring at him with your mouth slightly agape, he pushed the glass cup into your hands, forcing you to hold it as he guided it up to your mouth. Finally pulled out of your trance, you let out a small sigh and took a sip, the cool water finally washing away the bitter taste his release had left in your mouth. 
“I guess I don’t taste that bad,” He started, which on its own almost caused you to spit out the water, only to be shocked again when he continued the statement, “Or maybe I was just tasting you.”
You nearly choked while trying to swallow, yelling out afterward and slapping his shoulder, “Eren!”
“Shh, shh, just come here so I can hold you again.” He cooed, taking the glass from you and pulling you against him, “My angel.”
Pressing kisses to your head, he smiled as you snuggled into him, nuzzling your nose into the crook of his neck while he pet your hair. With both of you relaxed, it was quiet once more, the two of you cuddled into each other as the silence surrounded you, leaving you both to your thoughts.
Eren was thinking about what you’d said, about what you wanted if you won his “game.” Even if you didn’t remember it in the moment, he would feel bad if he didn’t give it to you eventually. Not to mention, you were smart. You’d end up asking about it again at some point. He knew you would, and the thought of it made him anxious.
It’s not that he didn’t want you to go into his room, it was just that the things he had out would be deathly embarrassing for you to see. Once he got the chance to clean everything up, it would be fine for you to come in. If anything, he wanted you to stay in his room. He wanted to be able to trust you enough to sleep in his bed with him, to experience that kind of deep intimacy with you; but with everything you’d done recently, he still wasn’t sure about it. However, he did have a somewhat peculiar idea about what you could do to gain his trust—one that would get the authorities off of his back too if he played the cards right. Your reaction to the idea would tell him all he needed to know about how much he could trust you too. It was brilliant—at least to him, it was.
As if your minds were parallel to one another, you decided to speak up and ask about what’d been promised to you, “Hey… am I still gonna get my reward since I technically won that game you mentioned?” 
“Funny you say that actually, I was just thinking about it,” he began his reply, tightening his arms around you so that you would be as flush against him, no space separating you, “And I thought about something else we could do that you might like a little more.”
Jumping to the conclusion that he was trying to back out of his past agreement, a frown formed on your face and you opened your mouth to scold him, only to be stopped with a finger pushed to your lips followed by his loud shushing.
“Shh! Just let me finish before you chew me out!” He hushed you, pressing kisses between your wrinkled brows until they relaxed, then continuing, “My idea wasn’t that different from yours. It’s pretty much the same. I’ll let you come into my room tomorrow, except I’ll also let you stay the night with me there.”
Again not allowing him to finish, you interrupted excitedly with a smile already taking over your face, “Really? In your bed? With you?”
Eren already spent many of his nights downstairs with you, but that wasn’t the same as sleeping with him in his bed. Sleeping in his room not only meant you were free from the unfriendly aura of the basement, but that you would have light when you woke up. You could wake up to the warm morning sun for the first time in a month. You’d missed it so much.
“Yes. With me.” He began again, clearing his throat and frowning at your repetitive habit of interrupting him, “But only under one condition.” 
Taking note of his annoyance, you stayed quiet this time, eyeing him as a way of silently asking him to continue.
“You need to call the police department tomorrow morning and tell them you don't want to go home.”
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taglist; @kpostedsum @missyasma @localdepressedvampire @chateks @erenyeagerdrip00 @beclover @tiffanyy-21 @momoewn @alienvarmint @berriesandcrem @erenjagerwifee @Sashaisahoeee @jkeluv @bobateasilverpearl (ask to join, and since it's been a while let me know if you changed your username and want to be back on the taglist or leave it! <;3)
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shawtuzi · 3 years ago
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Peaches and Coconut
i was high as shit as i wrote this lol. 
minors dni obvi 18+ content warnings: mentions of church n god but just a lil bit (erens dad is the pastor lol), SMUTSMUTSMUT, oral (male and female receiving) , penetrative sex, praising, softdom!eren, virginity loss, creampie n squirting, sorta daddy kink? it was said like 3 times idk, barely any plot this is pure filth// word count: 4.7k+
It started off as a normal Sunday. People ushering inside the church to find the best seats, relatives and friends catching up with each other their muffled voices mixing with the organ that played quietly, the kids touching running around in the pews trying to find some form of entertainment until they were brought down to the basement for playtime to not disturb the adults. Everything was normal and on routine. Well everything except you.
Eren was seated in his normal spot; threw pews down from the altar on the left side sitting at the very end. The spots next to him were empty and he was hoping they’d stay that way, and they usually do considering his dad was the pastor and highly suggested he had his space because he was “quite agitated on Sunday mornings.” 
He was scrolling mindlessly through his phone until the overwhelming scent of coconut and peach hit his nostrils, he looked up and saw you looking pretty as ever with your pastel pink knee length dress and a pink plaid trench coat to match. Your hair was styled to perfection in a slicked back bun along with a pink headband. “I’m sorry to bother you, are these seats taken?” God your voice. It was sweet like honey making him hang on to every word you said. You had the sweetest smile on your face, cheeks and nose slightly red from the cold weather outside. “No it’s not you can sit here” he gave you his award winning smile flashing his perfect teeth canines poking out. How could he say no to such a sweet face?
“Oh my goodness, great thank you so much! This is my family's first time coming here and we wanted to get good seats. We’re new to the neighborhood” you said, taking a seat next to him, your thighs brushing slightly together. You were very chatty and very open, he liked it tremendously, a small smirk coming onto his face as you continued to talk. “Oh my gosh where are my manners, let me properly introduce myself my name is Y/N” you giggled reaching your hand out to his. “No you’re fine” he chuckled, bringing his hand to envelope your small one in his shaking it slowly, “Eren Jaeger pleased to meet you pretty.” Your cheeks turned from a slight pink to a full blush, you quickly pulled your hand back clasping them together in your lap.
Just as Eren was about to make more conversation with you the service unfortunately started. He internally rolled his eyes as he heard his father speak at the altar for the umptenth time. As the service went Eren kept taking sly glances at you melting on the inside at how innocent you looked hanging on to every word his father was saying. He looked at your parents and from the looks of them he expected nothing less of their daughter; innocent, sheltered, and untouched. ‘This is going to be fun’ he thought to himself.
As the service ended he watched as your parents got up to greet his father as all the newbies in the church did leaving you once again by yourself. “That was incredible and the pastor is amazing isn’t he?” you gushed turning to him. “Yeah he’s pretty great but technically I’m supposed to say that he is my dad after all” he chuckled, eyeing the small cross necklace that hung prettily on your neck. You gasped in awe and it made his smile grow wider you were so fucking cute. “I bet that must be amazing. My dad was the pastor at my old church, I loved helping him during services and volunteering,” you smiled scooting closer to him. Bingo. A sinister smile made its way onto Eren’s face, “oh is that so? Well actually we’re having a Christmas party for the kids and I need some help with decorations, would you like to help me with them?”
“Of course I would, I loved planning stuff for the kids at my old church I-” Eren tuned out, paying attention to not your words, but the way your dress rode up your plush thighs. You looked so soft, so sweet and he bet you tasted even sweeter. You were a virgin through and through he could always spot one from a mile away and you were the epitome of one. His mind started drifting elsewhere, more darker nastier thoughts. He imagined the way you would sound as he lapped at your sweet pussy, slipping a finger into your tight untouched entrance. The way you would be crying for him to stop but cry even harder for him to keep going because the pleasure was too good.
“Eren? Are you okay?” you asked a look of worry washing over your face. He tensed up when he felt your hand on his knee rubbing small circles with your thumb. You were so unbelievably lucky you were in a room full of people or he’d take you right now with no restraint. “Yes I’m fine” he groaned, shifting in his spot feeling his cock start to harden under his dress pants, “what was your question?”
“I asked when we would be decorating silly” you giggled giving his knee a slight squeeze. “Friday after school, I could give you a ride here if you want? You go to Paradis High now right?” Your face suddenly flushed again and you looked down twiddling with your thumbs, “U-um actually I’m homeschooled….” you mumbled toying with the purity ring on your finger. A virgin and homeschooled? You were fucking perfect.
“That’s not a problem, pretty I’ll just pick you up from your house,” he offered, giving you a sweet smile. “R-really? You don’t think it's lame or embarrassing?” you asked, giving him big doe eyes. “Nope, not at all sugar” he chuckled, giving your thigh a firm pat, the way your thighs clenched didn’t go unnoticed at all. Don’t worry my angel you’ll be mine soon enough.
Friday couldn’t have come fast enough but it was finally here. Eren would finally have you all to himself for a couple hours. This entire week you were the only thing on Eren’s mind, you were the first thing he thought of in the morning and the last thing he dreamt of at night. Not to mention he’d been fucking his fist to the thought of you every. single. day. He’d be at the dinner table saying grace with his parents when suddenly an image of you would appear in his head, you underneath the table struggling to cockwarm him in your mouth, tears running down your rosy cheeks and drool dripping down your chin. It always ended the same way; him having to excuse himself while he got off in the bathroom imagining it was you riding him, your tight pussy sucking him in with ease as little whimpers and whines left your swollen lips.
As Eren pulled up to your house you were already outside ready to go and you looked absolutely breathtaking. You were wearing an oversized knit sweater with a black plaid skirt and the cutest fucking thigh highs. You were every mans dream and he intended on making you his and his only. “Hi Eren, it's so good to see you again!” you beamed reaching over the console to give him a warm hug. He nuzzled his face into your neck sniffing lightly. Oh how he’d missed the sweet smell of coconut and peaches. “It’s good to see you too angel ready to go?” he asked and you nodded cheeks turning pink at the nickname. You couldn’t deny he looked amazing as well. His shoulder length hair pulled back into a messy bun strands peeking out of it, along with a plain black hoodie and black sweatpants. So simple yet so handsome.
The whole drive there Eren let you do most of the talking just to hear your sweet voice. “I like your ring where’d you get?” he asked even though he already had an idea of what it was he just wanted to hear you confirm it. “Oh this here? It’s a purity ring my dad got me, you know to save myself for the man I love” you smiled showing it to him more clearly. He pulled the car into the parking lot and turned to you his green eyes boring into yours, “it’s beautiful angel purity suits you very nice” he chuckled grabbing your small hand and ran his fingers over the small diamond on your ring, “you radiate purity quite actually” he smirked bringing your hand up to his lips and leaving a chaste kiss on it. Your hand twitched under the kiss and he chuckled once again, “let’s get inside before we freeze.”
The church was quiet and empty as Eren led you to the basement insisting that you hold his hand so you wouldn’t get lost even though the building was fairly small. Once the two of you got to the basement the smile on Eren’s face immediately disappeared once he saw Jean fucking Kirstien already getting started on the decorations. “What are you doing here?” Eren asked, trying not to sound annoyed that Jean was seriously a walking cockblock. Jean turned around a smile etching onto his face, “Hey Eren! Nothing much, just getting a head start on the decorations, and who is this cutie?” Jean asked, eyeing you slowly and it made Erens blood boil. That was the same look Eren gave you when he first saw you so he already knew what sick thoughts Jean must’ve been thinking. “Oh that's perfect we have some extra help!” you beamed walking over to Jean to help him, “and I’m Y/N by the way so nice to meet you” you giggled and it made Eren sick.
Eren clenched his fist and took a deep breath before walking over to the two of you trying to put as much distance between you and Jean as possible. For a good fifteen minutes it was just you and Jean making conversation while Eren stood to the side seething at the blossoming connection between the two of you, “not on my fucking watch” he growled before an idea hatched in his head. “Oh shit” Eren said loud enough to get your guys’ attention, your eyes widening at his use of language. “What’s wrong Eren?” you asked quickly, walking over to his side to see if he was okay. “Yeah everythings fine but I just realized there’s some extra decorations my dad wanted me to get but I don’t want to leave you here by yourself…I mean I am the one that invited you after all it’d be so rude of me to leave you” he smiled then turned his attention to Jean the smile turning not to innocent, “Jean would you mind picking up some extra things I don’t wanna leave poor Y/N here all alone you understand right?” he said, cocking his head to the side.
“Oh- um yeah sure what do we need?” Jean asked, scratching the back of his neck. He would've said no but everyone knows you don’t tell Pastor Yeager’s son “no.”  “I’ll text you” Eren grumbled and Jean nodded silently making his way to the stairs, “I won’t be long” he said to the two of you even though it was more directed at you. As Jean finally made his exit Eren turned his attention to you, his demeanor quickly changing, “tell me something Y/N… do you like me?” your eyes widened at the question and you quickly nodded, “O-of course I do Eren you’re my only friend here” you pouted. Eren just couldn’t help himself, he brought his thumb to your poked out bottom lip softly running his thumb over it groaning when your mouth opened slightly like you wanted to suck it.
“Is that so? Then why were you flirting with my friend? Friends don’t flirt with each others’ friends angel” he chuckled darkly moving closer until you were backed against the table where all the decorations sat untouched. “I wasn’t flirting Eren! I promise! Please don’t be upset with me!” you pleaded tears brimming your eyes. “Oh angel shhh don’t cry” he fake pouted bringing both of his large hands up to cup your cheeks, wiping away the tears that fell. “You wanna make it up to me, yeah?” he asked, inching his face closer to yours. You nodded silently nuzzling your face into his palm, “yes anything for you Eren” you mumbled kissing his palm and Eren swears he could’ve came right there on the spot. “Fuck have you ever kissed anyone before baby?” he asked and you shook your head biting softly onto your bottom lip, “j-just once but it wasn’t like, with tongue or anything” you mumbled embarrassed at the confession. “Would you like to kiss me like that angel?” you nodded quickly and Eren wasted no time bringing his lips to yours.
The kiss started off slow and sweet but gradually got more hungry. Eren nipped at your bottom lip causing you gasp which gave him easy access to slip his tongue into your mouth, moaning at the taste of your strawberry chapstick. “Fuck angel you feel that?” he whispered, pressing his hard cock into your front, you nodded shyly looking up at him with big doe eyes “that’s what you do to me baby, make me so fucking hard I can’t even think straight.” He hissed when you brought your hand down to brush against it making you gasp, “s-sorry did I do something?” you asked, bringing your hands back to your sides. “No, no baby m’just so sensitive it hurts” he pouted grabbing onto his bulge palming himself gently, “wanna make me feel better? Take care of your friend, yeah?” he smiled when you shook your head.
“On your knees pretty c’mon” he whispered, pushing you down onto the rough carpet. He pulled down his sweatpants and boxers down allowing his throbbing cock to spring out slapping against his hoodie, he chuckled when he heard you gasp inflating his ego even more. He was fucking huge. A good seven and a half inches with a prominent vein on the underside that you could’ve sworn you saw visibly pulsing. “I don’t think it’s gonna fit Eren” you whimpered, feeling your panties dampen you were uncomfortably horny, slick making its way down your thighs the longer you stared at Erens cock. “Don’t worry my angel we’ll make it fit, now open up” he chuckled darkly slapping the tip of his cock against your kiss swollen lips. You opened your mouth slightly giving the tip an experimental lick and gasped at the taste, it was salty yet sweet and possibly your new favorite thing to taste. “Mmm you like it baby?” he groaned out watching you kitten lick the tip, “think you can take some more?” you nodded quickly, opening your mouth wider.
He smiled down at you patting your cheek, “such a good girl” he mumbled as you finally took the head on his cock into your awaiting mouth. You stopped  quarter of the way already gagging, but before you could pull your head away Eren pushed your head until his cock was fully sheathed in your warm mouth. “Oh fuck-shit!” he moaned, throwing his head back feeling you gag and splutter all over his dick. He was going to take it easy on you since it was your first time, but since you were on a time crunch and you felt too fucking good going easy was out of the question. Eren grabbed your head with both of his hands bobbing your head up and down with force. You brought your hands up to his thighs digging your nails into them until he slapped them away, he stopped your head until only the tip was in, “aht aht baby hands on your lap, be a good girl for me and I’ll make you feel so fucking good I promise” he groaned and nodded obediently placing your hands in your lap.
“That’s a good girl” he praised you patting your head softly, “now make me cum and I’ll give you a reward” he growled shoving your head back down. The only noises that could be heard were Eren’s loud moans and groans along with your gagging. “F-fuck pull your sweater up baby lemme see under there” he choked out and you obeyed lifting your sweater to show your full breasts almost spilling out of your white lace bra. He pulled his cock out of your drooling mouth and continued to jack himself off, spurts of cum falling onto your chest and little on your chin. “Fuck me” he mumbled looking down at you, “get up” he growled but before you could stand he was yanking you up using little strength to place you on the table , paper snowflakes, streamers, and rolls of tape scattering onto the floor. “Look at you so fucking beautiful, all fucking mine” he mumbled more to himself than you. With your shirt still lifted he licked, kissed, and sucked all over your breasts lapping up the cum that was on them, you gasped at the sight clenching your legs, “E-eren please” you whimpered feeling tears brim at your eyes again.
Eren looked up at you green eyes sparkling, “please what angel? Tell me what you want” he smiled, kissing your neck nipping at it softly. Your brain was on overdrive, there was so much happening and you knew it was wrong, god did you know it was wrong but it felt so good. The way he sucked at that special spot below your ear making you let out the prettiest sounds. “Want you to touch me…down there” you mumbled feeling your cheeks heat up. He removed his head from your neck, bringing his hand under your skirt rubbing your thigh, “right here?” he teasingly asked, rubbing slow circles with his thumb. You shook your head the sexual frustraition making you want to sob, “show me where you want me to touch you” he commanded and you bit your lip shyly taking the hand that was under your skirt and moving it towards your aching cunt. “Ohhh you want me to touch you right here?” he asked using his thumb to rub your clit over your soaked panties. You gasped clutching onto his bicep, “y-yes Eren please touch me right there ‘wanna feel you so bad” you cried out finally letting the tears fall.
“Well since you asked so nicely” he smiled pulling your panties to the side sliding a finger through your wet slit. “Fuck angel you’re so wet is this all for me?” he asked in a sickeningly sweet tone. You nodded quickly, tears still falling from your mascara smudged eyes, “yes it’s all for you I p-promise” you choked out grinding your pussy against his hand. That was all Eren needed to hear before he was rubbing quick tight circles on your clit, his middle finger prodding at your tight entrance. “Eren!” you cried out digging your nails into his bicep. He slipped his middle finger in and groaned at how tight you were, “shit angel you’re so fucking tight ‘gonna feel so good on my cock, m’gonna fucking split you open” he growled adding another finger and picking up the pace of his movement.
The squelching of your cunt got louder and louder and Eren knew exactly what was coming. Literally. “Eren I feel funny w-wait” you moaned grabbing onto the hand that was under your skirt but Eren just slapped your hand away, “it’s okay baby I got you let go cum on daddy’s fingers” he whispered sweetly in your ear biting gently onto your lobe. “Oh-!” before you knew it you were cumming all over Eren’s fingers, your legs shaking violently at the new feeling you just discovered. “There you go baby, just like that cream all over my fingers you’re doing so good I’m so fucking proud of you” he groaned grabbing the back of your neck and pulling you into a kiss, but this wasn’t like the other one; it was messy full of teeth and tongue and you honestly preferred it over the sweet and sensual way.
Eren pulled away a line of spit connecting your lips, “you did so good angel” he praised removing his hand from your skirt completely covered in your cum. He bought his middle finger to his mouth and moaned at the taste his eyes rolling back, “and you taste amazing too, go on taste yourself love” he whispered tapping his ring finger against your lips, you immediately latched onto the digit rolling your tongue over it until all your cum was cleaned up. “Taste good pretty?” he asked and you nodded a small smile coming onto your face, he chuckled at your reaction and kissed you softly rubbing his hands soothingly over your thighs. “You want some more? Want daddy to make you feel good again?” he queried and you nodded quickly making his heart flutter, “okay take off your sweater and lean back for me baby.”
You bit your lip softly and removed your sweater along with your bra making Eren let out a guttural groan, “fuck you are so fucking beautiful” he mumbled grabbing your breasts in his rough hands grazing your nipples with his thumbs making you whimper, “now lay back for me angel.” You laid back against the table, your back arching slightly from the cool temperature. Eren swiftly pulled your panties off and tossed them aside making a mental note to grab them later and keep them for himself. He cursed under his breath once he finally saw your dripping pussy, “fuck you’ve got the prettiest pussy I’ve ever seen.” The nasty comment made you cover your face but Eren was quick to move them shaking his head, “eyes on me doll.”
Eren wrapped your legs around his waist gripping his leaking cock and tapped the tip against your swollen clit. “You ready for me, pretty baby?” he asked and you nodded, “yes Eren please make me yours, ‘wanna be your good girl forever, w-wanna marry you” you whimpered moving your hips up against his cock. “Don’t worry baby m’gonna make you mine, gonna fucking breed this pussy” he growled before slowly pushing in the tip making you gasp loudly.
“Shh shh it’s okay baby I know, I know I got you” he cooed, kissing away your tears, “don’t worry my angel I’m gonna make you feel so good” he promised nuzzling his head into your neck kissing it softly. After sliding in inch by inch he finally pushed all the way in, “Eren!” you screamed, gripping onto his shoulders. You’ve never felt so full in your life and it was a painful stretch at first but the pain subsided once Eren started rubbing quick circles on your clit. “Ready for me to move?” he asked breathlessly, trying his hardest not to cum already. You nodded whimpering, burying your face into his neck inhaling his cologne, “y-yes please move daddy please!” you pleaded and Eren didn’t need to be told twice slowly moving his hips, his heavy balls patting softly against your ass. 
You threw your head back moaning softly, “oh my g-” you cut yourself off biting down harshly onto your lip drawing blood. Eren chuckled darkly picking up his pace, “go ahead and say it he’s listening” he taunted which only made you moan louder. He grabbed your right hand and took your ring finger into his mouth, sliding the purity ring off with his teeth and setting it aside. Your eyes widened at the sight, you should’ve slapped him from removing such a sacred thing your father gifted to you but it was also the hottest thing you’ve seen in all your eighteen years of living.
“Don’t think you’ll need that anymore huh?” he giggled picking up the pace of his hips slamming into your weeping pussy. He stood up straight bringing your legs over his shoulders before continuing his brutal pace, his bun had completely fallen out, beautiful brown locks cascading down his shoulders. He looked like he was carved from the gods, gorgeous tanned and toned body, huge arms that bulged every time he thrusted into you, but your favorite was his blissed out face as he fucked you. The way his eyes fluttered shut every time you clenched around him or the way he bit his plump lips and clenched his jaw, it was almost too much for you. Scratch that it was too much for you.
“E-eren I’m gonna-” you cried out back arching off the table as you came all over his cock liquids spraying all over your thighs and his abdomen. “Oh fuck” he yelled not stopping his movements, “who knew my prettly little angel was a squirter?” he laughed pulling his cock out and slapping your clit making you jump. “E-eren I don’t think I can keep going” you whimpered trying to shut your legs but he just pushed them back open again. “You can and you will because you wanna make me happy right? Wanna make me feel good like I’ve been making you feel good?” he asked in that sweet voice of his that makes you melt internally. “Okay I guess-” before you could even finish Eren slammed back into you literally knocking the air out of your lungs.
“Mmm that’s right my good girl taking her daddy’s cock so well, maybe I won’t take you to get a Plan B and just breed you here all. fucking. night.” he growled pounding into you harder during the last three words. “You’d like that wouldn’t you? Carrying around my babies in your belly, fuck I bet your tits would get so big from the milk I’d drink from them everyfuckingday” You couldn’t even talk too drunk on his cock to come up with a response, all you could think about was Eren Eren Eren. Eren’s thrusts got sloppier and his moans got louder, “oh shit I’m gonna cum baby I’m gonna cum in your pretty little pussy oh my god” he groaned out finally hitting his release. Ropes of cum filling your womb so much it was leaking out of your poor abused pussy.
“S-so full” you whined clenching around Eren’s cock making him groan. “Fuck I know baby. I don’t think I’ve ever cum that much before” he chuckled slowly pulling out of your cunt watching your releases spill out of your beat up pussy. He leaned down licking and slurping up as much as he could, moaning at the taste. “No no no please” whimpered trying to push his head away. He stood up straight grabbing you by your throat and pulling you towards his face, “open” he mumbled and you obeyed sticking your tongue out like the good little girl you were. He spit the mixes of his cum and yours onto your tongue and you quickly swallowed it sticking out your tongue once more to show him and he smiled. “My good fucking girl” he said before kissing you roughly still tasting your releases on his tongue.
“Now let’s get out of here before horseface realizes I lied about getting decorations” he said pulling his sweats up. You gasped and hit his shoulder, “Eren I can’t believe you lied about that that’s not good” you huffed putting your bra and sweater on. You hopped off the table and Eren shook his head chuckling, “oh but what we were just doing was any better?” he teased squeezing your sides. “Oh stop it and where are my- oh here they are!” you smiled reaching for your panties about to put them on until Eren snatched them out of your hand. “I’ll take these for safekeeping” he smirked bringing them to his face taking a long sniff making you gasp. “You’re disgusting” you mumbled feeling your cheeks turn crimson red at the lewd act.
“Yeah yeah now let’s go pretty baby we have the whole day to ourselves” he said wrapping his arms around you kissing your nose. “What about Jean? What if he came back and heard?” you asked pouting and Eren shook his head rolling his eyes, “Jean didn’t hear anything even if he did he wouldn’t say shit, not unless he’s looking for the ass beating of a lifetime.”
Jean in fact did hear which was why he was in the church bathroom fucking his fist to sounds he heard from you and Eren. Maybe Eren would be nice enough to share next time? Who knows you might get lucky angel.
<3
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kikyan · 4 years ago
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The monster I've become
Yandere Eren Yeager x female!Reader
Not a single voice was present and no one else besides you and your younger sibling were present. Constantly running for your life and hiding away from them. 
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The Titans
It's shocking that you have lived this far but you have been hiding under a basement ever since the wall had been breached and only came out when your supplies were low.
" A-Are they up there?" You brother (B/N) asked in a timid manner.
You put a hand on his shoulder and smiled brightly.
"Don't worry! Your big sister will protect you!" Reassuring him made his smile grow weakly, but at least he carried a smile.
Opening the latch and closing it quickly, but gentle at the same time. You quickly made your way into the building and began looking around. Luckily this building still had a roof that protected you a little and covered you from the beasts eyes. Looking to your left you saw a titan walking and immediately crouched down and hid.
You waited until it left and proceeded to walk around the building. Luckily aside from building a nice little basement it had some tunnels that stretched to the market place where you could easily sneak into. You gently lowered yourself down and began walking in the tunnel. Upon arriving you got up and looked around. The tunnel connected to a basement in the marketplace that stores excessive amounts of food but to your disbelief there wasn't a lot of food left.
' I could have sworn that the last time I checked there was more food! Even if it did rot it would still be there but it isn't.' You pondered your thoughts more and more but your stomach sank when you heard a 'click' from the entrance to the basement. You quickly hid yourself in some blankets and hoped for the best. You thought that it was impossible for a human to be here aside from your brother and that if it were a titan you would be safe as long as it didn't see you nor hear you.
Clicking sounds were heard and a voice startled you.
" Oi sasha don't sneak in here! If we're caught we'll be in big trouble!" A hushed voice began spending, the voice sounded deep and the voice following after it sounded more like a screech.
" I can't help it connie! I'm just hungry all the time!"
" Both of you need to stop eating before we all get caught! That's for everyone sasha okay?!" A deep raised voice began speaking to both 'connie' and 'sasha'. You peeked and saw a male with brown hair and blue eyes speaking to a female who had medium length brown hair in a pony tail with light gold eyes who was stuffing her face with food.
" It wasn't me?! It was her?! I only followed her!" A male with light brown hair kept nicely shaved with gray eyes began speaking and in attempt to plea for his innocence.
"Eren, we should go." A soft monotone voice spoke. Peering your eyes over you saw a beautiful female with black hair and gray eyes. You beloved that the boy with blue eyes was named Eren and luckily they had plans on leaving. Unfortunately, fate had other plans as Eren began walking around the room.
"Aside from food we can find some things that can help us and the others." He picked up pliers and examined them. As he began examining the room the closer he got to your hiding spot.
'Shit'
" Like this blanket!" Connie ran to the blanket and pulled it off revealing you to them. A surprised scream emitted from connie alerted the others and the black haired female ran to Eren as he began running to you.
" W-Who are you?" Demanded Eren and you slowly began to get up from your hiding spot.
" My name is (Y/N) and along with my younger brother, I believe we should be the only living residents here. If you excuse me I would appreciate it if you stopped shoving our food down your mouth.
" This is our food by right!" Yelled Sasha protectively clutching the food.
"Tch. Listen, this is our food. My brothers and mine. We've been feeding from here since the wall was destroyed so I suggest you leave before something happens." In a intimidating manner you seem to only fuel them more but before any of you guys had the chance to say anything. A small scream pulled you from your discussion.
"(B/N)!!" Not giving a damn you yelled and ran to save your family with the four people you met following you behind your trail. Diving into the tunnel and running as fast as you can.
The sight you saw shocked you but it didn't give you fear. You're brother was still alive.
The titan was on the ground waiting a soldier, but it seems that it didn't go down without a fight. The soldier was able to cut it's legs and bring it down. After the titan finished it's meal his eyes were turned to your brother. 
.
.
.
"OH NO YOU FUCKING DON'T!" Screaming from the top of your lungs you rushed in not giving a damn about the screams from the soldiers you met. Once close to the titan he extended his arm to get your brother, but you used that to your advantage.
Swiftly climbing on top of its arm, you made your way up to its face and repeatedly stabbed it in the eyes. Quickly jumping off, you grabbed your brother and ran to the other soldiers.
"Hey since you seem to be good with that machine you own I'm leaving this titan to you. You grabbed your brothers arm and ran back into the tunnel in hopes of escaping the monster.
"W-WHAT?!" Connie yelled as he began panicking.
~~
(B/N) began hyperventilating as wet salty tears rolled his eyes. Clutching him close you began whispering words of encouragement and rubbing circles on his back.
"Don't worry big sister is here okay (b/n)".
His cries soon stopped as he began to sleep on your lap. You began to pet his hair and soon enough the soldiers came to see if you were still alive. Shushing them you carried your brother back to basement known as "Home" and stopped to see the body of the titan. 
Opening the latch you walked in and set your brother down on the bed and a voice soon cut you off.
"You were amazing back there." You turned around to see 'Eren' complimenting you more and more until he asked a question that began to scare you.
"Why don't you join the survey corps?"
"No. My brother needs me here with him and alive. A change of place would be nice too but if that comes with me joining the survey corps then no thank you."
" With your strengths we could save humanity!"
" All I need is my brother. Humanity can die for all I care." With those harsh words they stopped persuading you but only one boy didn't. As the others left only he stayed behind.
" Humanity can die? How selfish can you be?" Eren slightly rose his voice and with his angry expression met yours as well.
"Selfish? Wow...rich coming from you. You were from the Shiganshina District right? On the edge of Wall Maria? I didn't live that far from you. Your father constantly visited my house due to abuse from my father. Remember us? The (L/n) family? All the drama going on?" Continuing your story Eren's expression changed from anger to shock in less then a few passing moments.
" When the titans showed up some debris of the wall fell on my mother's leg. Me and (b/n) cried and screamed for help. Everyone ran past and some yelled "let her be food". Then I saw my mother being eaten in front of me. I shielded (b/n) but I saw it all. The blood, flesh, and I heard the pleas of my mother. When me and (b/n) ran we were met with a gate and people leaving in boats. We could have gotten safe passage if it weren't for my father. He was next and they asked him if he had family and... that selfish bastard said no so he wouldn't wait. Feel free to call me selfish but keep in mind. Everyone is selfish especially in the end." Grabbing (B/n) you left Eren and swiftly walked to another building.
Eren was shocked. It was true. Humans are selfish and even more when they know they're about to die. His mother was eaten in front of him and he couldn't do anything. (Y/N) however survived many things. The constant abuse from her father and for 5 years survived in a titan infested district. He admired her and felt an urge to protect her. He followed her and saw the rest of the soldiers surrounding her and (b/n).
(B/n) was crying while (Y/N) had a strong glare on all of them. Keeping her protective clutch on (B/N), she scanned her surrounding in hope's of finding some sort of weapon.
" Who are you?"
" She couldn't have survived that long outside. Could she be a titan shifter?"
" Should we kill her and the brat?"
Eren's stomach sank as he rushed over to where Mikasa was.
"What's going on?"
" They found (y/n) and think she is a titan shifter. They might plan on executing her."
Eren's eyes grew in shock and as he ran to her aid, a familiar blonde man grabbed his hand.
" Wait Eren. I want to see how she responds to this."
Eren turned to see Erwin calmly focusing on (Y/N).
"B-bu-"
" If it gets serious I'll jump in."
(Y/N) stood there silent until a soldier appeared before her. He took out a small pocket knife and circled her around.
" That brat yours?"
" He's not a brat, can't say the same about you in your younger days".
" What makes you say so huh bitch?"
" Just the way you act, obviously no one taught you how to act. Well then again not like your father cared. He was too busy getting over his hangover then giving a shit about you. Huh neighbor?"
" You bitch!"
The soldier ran to you with the knife as you slightly pushed (B/N) aside. You ducked down and using your weight threw him off his feet. The knife flew away from him as you picked it up and ran to (B/N).
" Think your hot stuff because you took down one of us?" A second man ran to you and you dodged his attempt and using the knife drove the blade into his eye.
A blood curling scream was present as you took back the knife and ran to (B/n).
"M-MY EYE!!"
Suddenly a man approached you. He had black hair and stone cold blue eyes.
" I don't think getting rid of our soldiers is a good idea...brat."
Glaring at the male you scoffed before someone ran to you. It was Eren.
~~
"Corporal! Please she proved her worth I'm sure we could use her in  the survey corps! Please don't hurt her."
Shocked by his sudden outburst you grabbed (B/N) and feeling a strange protected feeling got closer to Eren. That didn't go unnoticed by him.
" That's not my decision its Erwin's."
" She can."
Turning their attention to Erwin who began walking over to (Y/N) he stopped and smiled at (B/N) before turning to the rest of the Survey corps.  "She joining so please make her feel welcome."
" I never agreed." Stone cold voice accompanied by eyes, you glared at Erwin.
" Of course you did. You want to survive right?"
" I did for the past five years alone with my brother."
" You see now that we found you we have to take you with us. So it's only natural to join."
" Feel free to take me but I'm not joining the Survey Cor-"
" Miss (L/N) wasn't your father involved in human trafficking and the illegal use and smuggle of drugs? Didn't you also partake in that to avoid your family being beat. No matter the reason you still are considered a criminal."
" YOU'RE FUCKING BRIBING ME?"
" Not at all. Simply reminding you that you could come with us and join the Survey Corps or you could go to jail. Remember your brother plays a role in this too."
" DON'T YOU FUCKING TRY!"
" He can see his sister as a hero or be bullied and see his sister as a criminal."
Before continuing to fight back a hug from your brother changed everything.
" Please! Big sister I don't want you to die but I don't want you to be seen as a criminal!"
All eyes were on you as you struggled to speak. Your brother pleading you not to choose one and everyone else who couldn't care less.
" Don't worry (B/N)! I'll take care of your big sister!" Eren said in a cheerful voice as you turned to him.
"R-really?"
" Of course!"
" (Y/N) please! I don't want them to see you as a criminal!"
Looking down at your brother with tears staining his face you looked up and with a sigh....
.
.
.
" Fine I'll join."
~~ °•☆~~☆•°~~
It was the day of the expedition and you quickly changed in hopes in visiting your brother earlier. As you opened the door you were greeted by Eren.
" (Y/N) c'mon let's go see (B/N)!"
" Of course"
~~ mini flashback ~~
They lent you a horse and you quickly followed them. (B/N) was laughing and smiling at the green pasture and the beautiful flowers that were outside. A pain hit you in your head as you remembered that you guys have never been outside. It's always been in the basement and you smiled. Soon enough (b/n) will be able to play with other children. See the sun and live a normal life. You however may not be so lucky. You wanted to not be noticed and be that soldier that if you died they at least acknowledged your death and took care of (b/n). Eren however, wasn't going to allow that to happen. He quickly made an effort to befriend you and your brother.
"Wow big sister! Look what's that?" (B/n) pointed to a white flower with a red stain. Mentally cringing at the red,  you smiled and cheerful spoke up.
" Why (B/N) It's a white rose."
" Then why does it have red?"
No hesitation needed as you looked at it.
" It's blood."
A small gasp escaped your brother but it wasn't because of the flower. Noticing the field of flowers some where red and some white, some both but the both were increasing in amounts. More blood was on them, but from what.
"(Y/N)!!" A voice was all you heard before the sound of speeding horses broke you out of your trance.
Taking off a sweater you wore you tied it around yourself and (B/N). Kicking the horse and gaining speed you safely ran from the clutches of the titan. Problem was..the fact that it wasn't the only titan there. One quickly made its way to you and as fear began piling up you couldn't hear a thing except the cries of (B/N).
The sound of gas and wires broke you out from that prolonged trance and Eren made work of the titans. Killing them both he got back on his horse and rode to your side.
" (Y/N)! Are you okay?? (B/N) what about you??"
You could hear anything but that all changed when you felt the warmth of another person. Eren to specify.  Eren hugged you in attempts to calm the both of you. You directed your eyes  to Eren and hugged him back.
" Don't worry I'll protect you! For you I'll do anything!" Eren smiled but the thoughts behind the smile weren't anything to smile about.
~~
You were assigned living quarters and (b/n) would be living with with your grandmother who survived the attack. Your grandmother was in top shape heck she was 47 years old. She too cried for you and pleaded for you to not join the survey corps but in order to ensure their future you need to.
Being placed in the same squad as Eren wasn't bad but he kept trying to learn everything about you. You didn't mind as you already told him your backstory. Walking with Eren to your grandmother's house silence loomed the both of you for a second.
" Hey (Y/N)?"
"Hm"
" If I were a monster would you still treat me the same?"
" Of course. You saved me multiple times and I'll return the favor. Eren you are my best friend. Of course I'll treat you the same." Sending him a reassuring smile you saw the bright pink tint his cheeks and a slight pout on his face.
Upon arriving at your grandmother's house you smiled and knocked the door only for it to be opened immediately and a little boy screaming.
" BIG SIS!!" (B/N) cheered and smiled brightly. He hugged you and soon ran to Eren.
" BIG BROTHER! You'll protect big sis today right?" (B/N), with worry laced in his words he looked up at Eren and gave the most sad look...Eren ruffled his hair and smiled " Of course!"
Simply smiling you laughed a little before reassuring your family that you would be safe. Walking out of the house you sighed and inhaled.
The smell of dew drops lingered and it was refreshing. A little memory flew through your mind as you smiled.
~~
Loud, harsh thunder roared across the sky as you and (B/N) stayed hidden deep within the basement.
" Big sis I'm scared! That sound!" 
(B/N) was clutching you and his ears for protection.
Safety hugging him back you led him to the farthest area of the basement where less noise resided. Simply humming him a lullaby was enough to make him sleep the night away, but the fear of a monster attacking was present and increasing with every passing second.
~~
  Riding your horse at full speed as you began making your way back. You killed 7 titans in this expedition and were able to get a village under safety as well.
The gate opened and into safety you entered. Luckily no one died which was great but more people were here...unfortunately he was here. 
.
.
.
   You're father. 
~~
The cheers and the distasteful comments were swirling into an inaudible tune. All you could see was the smirking face of that man. As your horse began inching closer he was sweeping through the crowd.
The horses stopped in a halt as your father began approaching you.
"(Y/N), look at how big you've gotten! Where's (B/N)? I presume he's alive. I can't wait to see him."
Those lies that left his mouth were like gasoline with fire, it fueled you. Before you could even open your mouth to curse this man, Eren beat you to it.
" LOWLY BASTARD! HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT WHEN IT'S YOUR FAULT THEY ALMOST DIED! YOUR SELFISH DESIRES ARE THE CAUSE OF EVERYTHING. YOU LEFT YOUR CHILDREN WHEN THEY NEED YOU THE MOST YOU BASTARD!"
Eren argued as your father only looked at him in pure anger.
" I supported my children, saved them and this is what I get? Talk about selfish."
"Big sis...?"
That timid voice broke you out of your mute trance as you turned horrified, to see your brothers frightful face.
" Ah (B/N)! Lovely seeing you too! I've missed you! Have you missed me too?"
" GET AWAY FROM HIM!" You rushed in to wrap your brother in a loving warm hug. Clutching him close to your chest you nuzzled him deep within your chest.
Your grandmother ran to protect the both of you, hearing the constant abuse and the crimes you both were forced to commit the strong sense of judgement turned into pure hatred for this man.
" What you have done to my grandkids is despicable. Don't you even think about saying another word to them."
Before anything serious broke out the words of an old familiar corporal  broke out.
" Disturb a member of my squad and you will face the consequences, criminal."
Your father left and wasn't seen at all that day. It took a while to calm your brother but in the end he went out like a light and stayed cuddling to you like a teddy bear.
~~
" What do you mean "My squad"?"
" Erwin is transferring you into my squad. However we have something more to discuss." Levi said as he opened the door to Erwin's office.
" Cadet (Y/N), sorry for the scene earlier."
" It wasn't your fault, but thank you."
" Now I have transferred you to Levi's squad and you will be in the inner walls undercover. You are allowed to take your family with you."
"Sir bu-"
" Your safety matters more. You are a skilled warrior and I'm sure you'll be fine but considering that both you and your family have a higher risk of being hurt and being forced into a crime we will make sure to transfer you into the inner wall."
You agreed to the choice and prepared to tell your grandmother and (B/N), but your talk did not go unnoticed by a certain someone.
~~
The night was young as you walked to your grandmothers house. Upon arriving there you knocked and spoke up alerting them that it was you.
" (Y/N)? Why are you here so late?"
" Grandma I have something to say. They wish to transfer me to the inner walls and I need to take you with me."
" I have everything here (Y/N), besides (B/N) made some friends. To leave them behind is asking too much from him."
" I know grandma but...(B/N) and you have a higher risk of being attacked by him if you stay here any longer. Please consider it. If you do say yes, please be packed and ready to go early in the morning."
Hugging your grandma good bye and ruffling (b/n) messy hair gave a feeling of content and peace. Your plan was also heard by someone else, someone very close by.
~~
" That brat is going to the inner walls. If I can also gain passage I'll expand the business all right?" A deep voice spoke out to a group of several more individuals.
" Alright man, we'll portal here don't worry. How are you going to get her to cooperate?"
" Fear is something that is easily created don't forget that."
That was the only word he spoke before his bloody body was found in the morning.
~~
The news of your father hit you but didn't exactly affect you. You still were obliged to go and your family in the event that one of his "buddies" wanted pay back. Quickly packing, you made your way.
" (Y/N) are you leaving me?" A voice disrupted your thoughts as you looked behind you to see the lifeless eyes of Eren.
" Its orders Eren. I'm sorry, we can still communicate and you're one of my bes-"
" (Y/N). You can't. A guy does something special and nice only for it go unnoticed?"
The tone and the words all reminded you of him...
" Eren calm down. I don't need you telling me what to do. The safety of both me and my family are strong and I need to go."
" Remember what I said about doing anything for you?"
   ...
" Let's say a life paid the crime of attempted assault. I saved you."
Confusion shook your body as you failed to realize. A life? Who?
" W-Whose life did you take..?"
" Your father of course. His body covered in bruises and burn mark. After that I used a blade to slowly cut him. Every lie he told, every crime he committed, every tear that rolled on your cheek, he felt it with pain. You see (Y/N)..i love you. I desire you. Won't you be mine?"
" W-what...?" 
"You see...your father planned on attacking you. He overheard what you were planning on doing, he was going to attack your grandma and (b/n). I did this for you. You need me to help you, I'll protect you, and I'll love you for life."
Sprinting you ran into the town only to hear the screams of the townsfolk.
"I-i just saw blood leading out of the alley way and i-i-i looked and saw I-i just can't!"
You rushed inside the alley was only to see the mutilated body of your father. Only his head, and limbs were there. The torso was gone...
Running to the house of your grandmother you stopped when you saw Eren standing in front of them.
" ah (y/n)! We were just talking about you! Remember when you told me you liked me? Well seems (b/n) said that was cool and your grandma likes that."
" W-wai-"
" Say yes and they both live."
Those horrid words came like a dark whisper and you swallowed your fear and pride and nodded your head. Leaving surprised and happy gasps, a silent tear rolled off your face.
~~
A week since this toxic relationship and no one seeing the pleas you give. After your father was found dead it was then made clear that you weren't needed to be in the inner walls. Eren took that advantage and made sure he could be with you 24/7. One day with courage you asked a simple question.
" Why me?"
Eren smiled and looked out a window.
" (Y/N) I've always had a small crush on you. When you lived next to us I would see how strong you were and I always tried to impersonate you. Everytime Armin was being bullied I did what I could to help, but it wasn't enough. I could never be you. It wasn't until I found you living under a basement and it wasn't until you revealed to me what you've been going through. That's when I realized that deep down you wanted to cry and scream. You stayed strong for the sake of your family, but that was okay. That gave me confidence that I could protect you and maybe be loved by you. So here we are now. You don't have to fear anything and love me forev-"
" BUT I DON'T LOVE YOU EREN!"
The instant those words left your mouth you were pushed into the bed and your lips sealed by a passionate kiss. Leaving you no air you pounded upon his chest to allow you to breathe and moments later you got your request. Panting for air and saliva connecting your lips, Eren smiled at you and bent down to your ear. Lightly nibbling on it he trailed his bites onto your neck. Only pain was brought upon and your whimpers were hushed. Eren looked into your eyes and repeated.
" Remember I'll do anything for you...in return all I want is your love. After all....you'll soon come to love.
.
.
.
.ThE mOnStEr I'vE bEcOmE..
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vesuvian-american-fics · 4 years ago
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better with time. Ch 1
a century of hell.
You are a titan shifting 25 year old woman who had been trapped in her titan body wandering Paradis Island for 107 years. Over the decades you finally grew the strength to break free of your weakened titan form, just as Captain Levi happened upon you during an expedition. (AO3)
Words: 1,953
How long has it been?
How many years?
Where am I again?
How did I get here?
These questions racked through your mind every day without fail. You were confused, scared, and tired. There weren’t many things you remembered from your life before, it wasn’t the happiest that’s for sure. The year was 743, you remember a vast body of water, that seemed to continue on infinitely, you got off of a ship, and in the next moment you were falling. Before you hit the sand below you were different, much larger than before, and you couldn’t control your movements.
You ran ahead along with the other titans watching in horror as humans were mauled and eaten whole. You couldn’t stop yourself, your body seemed to be under a sort of spell or compulsion that forced you to act violently. It tasted horrible, you wanted nothing more than to wake up from this nightmarish hell. But you were stuck, stuck for so many years you lost count of how long you’d been trapped and all shreds left of your humanity faded away into the darkness, along with any other precious memories.
60 years passed in this hell before you began to gain control over your new titan body. With this revelation came a wave of determination washing over you. You ran far away from civilization, far away where you came into contact with little to no humans. When you did see any you avoided them like the plague and they avoided you just the same, you were thankful. Little did they know you were a human just like them, fighting to survive.
The remaining years or torture were spent with you hiding away in a dense forest where you gladly starved yourself. Hidden away, safe from harm, your titan form weakened day by day. Every day was the same, you lay face down on the forest floor as the seasons changed above you. Dead leaves fell atop your body, later came the snow but your body stayed warm. When the snow melting flowers bloomed around you, spring time was one of the few things you enjoyed while in hell, daisy’s, wild flowers, and other weeds springing up all around you, blowing in the wind. The summer rains were harsh but soothing never the less, that is until they turned raging storms overhead. The thunder was frightening, but not as frightening as your titanic circumstances.
You counted the seasons as they passed but as the decades drew on you gave up on trying. You felt your body grow thin and frail, your bones shown clearly through the skin, you couldn’t lift your body now if you wanted to. It was summer now; you could tell by the sweltering heat on your nape. The heat was almost too much to bear, and in your efforts to move to the shadows you felt your real body twitch.
Your real body... twitched.
You gasped; your titan body must have become so thin that your human body was free to move. Maybe you could even break free and try to find some help. New found hope bubbled in your chest as you fought to free yourself from the titan’s flesh. Natural light began to filter into the cavity you were confined in for so many years.
Freedom, after so long its within reach.
The 58th Scouting Mission to the Forest of Giant Trees.
Scouts, in their haste to flee the forest in the 57th Scouting Mission left behind many valuable harpoon canons that were used to trap the Female Titan. This mission is to retrieve them. Led by Captain Levi the scouts set out to complete their mission, hopefully without incident. As the Scout Regimen reached the borders of the forest a peculiar sight caught their eye.
“I don’t think that titans moved an inch since the last time we were here.” Eren Jeager, commented. Armin noticed it too, it looked even thinner than it did a few weeks ago.
“Don’t get too close Eren.” Mikasa chided, pulling her horse in between his and the titan before them.
“Oi. Brats.” Levi barked gaining the younger scouts’ attention.
“Stop wasting time staring at that thing. We have a mission to complete.” He said, a bored look in his eyes. He wanted to be in and out of that horrid forest as quickly as possible and the sun was already set high in the sky.
Without another word, the scouts continued their trek into the forest to retrieve anything left from their last expedition. The work was tiresome, hours had passed and the sun was making its descent towards the horizon by the time they left the forest. No one died today, but a few titans did cause a bit of trouble for them. There was never a mission that went completely smooth no matter how much Levi wished for it.
On the way back to base, the Scouts took another look at your titan form. Steam now emanating from the flesh. Levi made sure to keep everyone at a distance, he was sure the titan couldn’t move but whatever was happening he had a bad feeling about it.
Levi drew his blades, sliding off of his stallion to saunter over to your weak titan, he stood atop its head as he watched something move beneath the skin. His eyes widened a fraction as he watched in shock as the flesh at the nape began to split on its own accord. Plumes of steam bellowed from the wound obscuring the scouts’ vision, Levi’s close vicinity aided him. He was the only one to see what happened next.
Something was inside, or rather, something was breaking free from the titan. More hot steam rose from the flesh wound as you lifted your head from the gash. Gasping for breath you opened your eyes and a trembling sigh spilled past your lips. Thick hot tears rolled down your cheeks, a look of pure bliss on your face. A man with onyx hair stood before you, a sharp blade pressed to your throat. Levi pressed forward, his blade causing a small nick on your flesh. The sting of pain made it all the more real for you. You were free at last.
Levi berated you with questions as your vision began to fade. His voice sounded muffled in your mind; you couldn’t quite make out anything he said before you were out cold. You were engulfed in a darkness once again, but this time, it was welcome. You fell limply backwards and as you did, Levi sliced the rest of the titan’s muscular attachments from your face and arms.
Noticing you were unconscious and thus, no longer a threat for the time being Levi came back to his senses. It finally registered to him the worried shouts from Armin on the other side of this wall of fog. Levi picked up your limp body, hoping down from the decaying corpse and walking slowly to the carts brought along for the expedition.
Emerging from the steam came Captain Levi, carrying you with an irritated scowl on his face. He handed you off to Reiner, a tall built man better equipped to carry someone bridal style.
“Put her on the cart, we’re heading back. Full speed.” Levi said and without another word the Captain was on his horse and riding away towards the base. Reiner and Bertolt gave each other confused looks before the remaining scouts hopped aboard their horses after having a look at you. Eren, Mikasa, and Armin caught up with their Captain quickly to bombard the man with questions.
Who are they?
They came out of the titan?
Are they from the walls?
“Oi! All I know is that she’s going straight to the holding cell in the basement when we get back. Erwin will ask questions later.” Levi barked, a headache forming in the back of his head. He wanted nothing more than to not ended up in this predicament today, but you were an unknown titan shifter. Thus, you were extremely dangerous and couldn’t go ignored.
In record time the Scouts arrived back at the base, and luckily just as Commander Erwin happened to be paying a visit, hoping to discuss reports with Hange Zoe.
“Commander. Shitty Glasses. You need to take a look at this.” Levi said, an unusually unnerving stare in his eyes. Without a word the two followed Levi to where you slept peacefully in the cart filled with equipment.
“Who’s this?” Erwin asked, his blue eyes scanning over your face with immense focus. Hange repositioned their glasses as they leaned over the cart to get a closer look.
“Get back. They’re a titan shifter we found in the Forest of Giant Trees.” Levi said as he pulled Hange back from your sleeping form.
“REALLY!?” Hange was just about vibrating with excitement and anticipation. They made quick work of scooping you up into their arms to take you inside, and in their haste, they knocked your head on the door frame. Levi rolled his eyes at Hange’s impatience and followed suite after dismissing the scouts to clean the base.
Erwin led them down to a cell in the basement of the base, handing off the key to Levi.
“She’ll stay here until she wakes up and explains herself. We’ll figure out the rest of the details then. I have business in the capitol, I’ll return as soon as you send word.” With a firm nod, Erwin excused himself from the base and on horseback he made his way to Wall Sina.
Levi explained to Hange your condition, and how he found you. He decided to watch you until you woke up from your sleep. Hange made sure to being drafting up a report on you in the meantime, trying and failing to have patience and wait for you to awaken before discussing any experiments they wished to try.
Three days later, you finally opened your eyes. You made a silent gasp as you sat up abruptly in your hard bed, your overgrown hair messy and falling into your face. You swiped the hair out of your way a felt over your face. You withdrew your hands from your face as you flexed your fingers flipped your hands over and over again, examining them. Normal human hands.
You snatched the rough sheets from your legs as your bent your knees and curled your toes. It’s been so long since you’ve seen yourself like this. You looked around your surroundings in the cell, and noticed a small hand mirror on the desk. You fell out of the bed in your haste to reach the desk and get a look at yourself. With trembling hands, you grabbed the mirror and held it up to your face. Slowly, you opened your eyes to look at yourself. Thick tears of joy rolled down the apples of your cheeks. You looked the same as the last time you saw yourself. You continued to poke and prod at your face, making sure this wasn’t some cruel dream when suddenly a deep grunt rang out in the darkness. A man clearing his throat sat cross legged outside of your cell with a thick book in hand and a small tea cup on the small table next to him. He marked his place in his book and uncrossed his legs before stepping closer to the bars that separated you both.
You gently placed the mirror down onto the desk before standing on your weak legs, backing yourself into the damp corner. You had your guard up, wary of the strange man and his icy stare.
Levi Ackerman finally broke the silence once again.
“Who are you?”
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breathings-of-the-heart · 5 years ago
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Imagine Levi Confessing his Love for You
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A/N: THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT PLEASE READ THE TEXT BELOW BEFORE PROCEEDING THANK YOU :))
HERE IS A TIMELINE /  EXPLANATION / BACKGROUND INFORMATION BECAUSE CASE THE TIME SKIPS OF THIS STORY ARE CONFUSING: I’m sorry for that everyone, I know the dates are sloppy and as a whole this fic doesn’t make too much sense; I tried to edit this piece as best I could to make the story as easy to follow as possible, but seeing as I can’t unpublish part 1 or 2, the cleanup still leaves things bit unclear. These imagines were originally chapters of a longer Levi x Reader fic that I decided to discontinue, which is why there are so many loose ends. Here was my original intention for this story, broken down for the few who choose to read the Author’s Notes lol.
We are going to do this in the order of the 3 part fic (I also put attached all the links to the titles)
Part 1: Imagine Relating to Mikasa About Loving Someone in the Military
The scene is set during the events of SEASON 1 of Attack on Titan, BEFORE the Female Titan Arc. (Y/N) was also hand selected by Levi to be part of the original Special Operation Squad; she bit her hand at the dinner table along with Petra, Gunther, Eld, and Oluo to show their dedication and understanding towards Eren wayyy back in the beginning of the series. The Survey Corps is making preparations for their first attempt to go to Shiganshina since the Fall of Wall Maria and not only uncover the mole who killed captive titans Sonny and Bean, but also to get to Eren’s basement.
Part 2: To Love Another
The flashback and opening scene in the beginning of this writing piece (where (Y/N) and Hange are talking to each other) occurs shortly after (Y/N) wakes up in the infirmary room, before anyone breaks the news that she, aside from an injured Levi, is the last surviving member of Squad Levi after Annie killed the others in the Forest of Giant Trees in her female titan form. Hange’s intentions were to bring the (Y/N) and Levi together so they would be able to support each other during this mutual loss. But alas, (Y/N) accepts his rejection and the two suffer the aftermath of this tragic news alone. To read this arc for context/bonus content to get a better understanding of this mini series, see my posts (as a sort of prequel, if you will) Imagine Levi Finding you Injured on an Expedition and Imagine Being the Last Member of Squad Levi To Survive to fill that time gap :)
In real-time, all of Season 2 and Season 3 Part 1 have gone by with limited interaction between (Y/N) and Levi. This part of the story is occurring during Season 3 PART 2, (spoilers) after the Coup D'etat, and after Historia becomes Queen. (Y/N) is no longer an active soldier, having sustained injuries too severe to be reliable in combat. She remains useful to the Corps as a battle strategist, however, which allows her to stay. The Scouting Regiment is currently preparing to go to Eren’s basement in their second attempt, knowing Reiner and Berthold will be waiting for them there.
Part 3: Imagine Levi Confessing his Love for You (YOU ARE HERE)
This part takes place pretty much a week or so after the events of “To Love Another.” It is revealed how much (Y/N) has isolated herself in the months between Parts 1 and 2 from not only Levi, but Hange, the only one besides Mikasa who knew about her feelings for Levi prior to their falling out. (Y/N) confesses her feelings for Levi before the mission to Shiganshina in Season one, and the fic parallels itself and comes full circle once their final interaction occurs before the second and final mission to Shiganshina, for which, (Y/N) is unable to go for her death would be almost certain. She seen to be more valuable inside the walls, where she can carry on the duties of the Survey Corps should the entire regiment collapse during the mission. This is the final part :)
I HOPE THAT CLEARS THINGS UP!
requested by @a-single-uwo @dracq and @little-diva-gurl and a lovely anon who def isn’t the happiest that this took so long. Deepest apologies! Hope this was worth the wait. I also hope this post finds everyone safe and in good health during these crazy times <3
~~~~~
Dread bottled up in the bottom of your stomach, which threatened to fall down to your knees. Even Hange’s eyes brimmed with concern when she informed you that Levi requested your presence in his office; all of which was out of the blue, uncharacteristic, after months of him being accustomed to giving you your space.
Feigning annoyance, you stared at the soldier dummy two paces ahead, dented heavily with the marks of your punches. The sun was beating down on the early autumn day, and heat waves rose from the ground. It illuminated the glistening perspiration sliding down your figure, torso rising and falling in short breaths of exhaustion.
Hange watched you carefully from a distance. She noticed your tense muscles, clad in a sports bra and boxing shorts; the lack of attire made it impossible to hide the sudden tension and stiffness embedded in your lean muscles, a tell tale sign of distress. As a creature of observation and analytics, the Squad Leader could sense your discomfort as if it was written across your forehead.
The brunette watched you wipe the sweat off your forehead and yell in frustration, turning towards her direction and moving to land a kick at her head.
Unfazed and in possession of sharp reflexes, Hange took a step back, only to watch as you twisted mid-air and landed a 360 Crescent kick to the dummy-shaped bag, which broke open on impact under the force of the blow. Sand poured out of its opening and spilled onto the ground in a steady stream that grew less heavy as the seconds passed.
“I’ll have to admit, you are getting better, but (Y/N), don’t get your hopes up,” Hange cautioned. “The problem does not reside in your muscles. No matter how well you learn to fight like you used to, Annie crushed your ribs and threw you to the ground: it's your lungs that will never recover. You can’t come with us to Shiganshina tomorrow like this.”
Hunched over with hands on your knees, you regained a regular breathing pattern and began to feel the explosive pain in your chest. Airways blocked, you began coughing, willing the oxygen to enter your body.
“Let me humor myself, Hange-san. If I don’t try, I might go insane.”
It was almost tragic that such a young soldier was out of commission; you were full of promise, rivalling Mikasa in skill. Hange knew you were itching to do what you trained for your whole life: Coming to Shiganshina and putting it all on the line had always been your number one goal. You didn’t want to be left behind again, to die bitter and alone without the only people you cared about.
“Regardless, (Y/N), you’re stalling,” Hange smoothly shifted the topic of conversation back to what brought her to you in the first place. “He still has that power over you, huh?”
"It'll pass eventually," you sighed, hoping the words were true.
You bowed towards the tall female. She smiled in return, shaking her head softly.
Whilst pacing away, said person stopped you once more.
“(Y/N). For what it’s worth, I stand by what I said before. Don’t look so nervous, okay?”
Her words replayed in your head, a haunting ghost of the not-so-long ago past. Time was strange, that way. It seemed like everything happened yesterday yet in another lifetime, all at once. “He loves you, more than he’s ever loved anyone. Surely you know that.”
Stupid, you thought, how I might have believed it once.
As you made your way down the hall, numbness crept into your body once again. You were too proud to admit you were afraid, especially with the Section Commander’s radiating sympathy, but everyone knew the once friendly dynamic between you and the Captain transformed into one more distant and cold. With each step towards the door, you felt the icy chill grow and that fact alone shook you to the core. 
But it didn’t matter, seeing as Levi was of superior authority. There was no way around it.
Your hand shook as it raised to knock.
~~~~~~
“Name and business,” Levi spoke, voice muffled by the closed door.
“It’s (Y/N), sir. I was hoping to speak with you.”
There was a pause, and in that time you considered the option of fleeing back to your room and retreating back to a life of emotional safety, normality. It wasn’t too late to forget.
It had been a week since you spoke to Mikasa on the rooftop, after realizing the deep shit your heart decided to put you in. You didn’t think Levi would notice the distracted nature of your behavior-- tried to make it as subtle as possible whilst you figured out what you felt for him. 
But before you could explore other options, Levi muttered a stern “enter.” You knew with the first expedition back to Shiganshina tomorrow, and the prospect of death closer than it has ever been on a mission, it was now or never. 
The room was dim, small, warm, and thick with building tension. Shadows danced across the Captain’s face, sharp features lit by an orange flame. Only candlelight, sourced at his desk, assisted your adjusting eyes. 
Your nose was hit with the smell of tea and cleaning products upon entry. This fact made you smile despite your bundling nervous energy. It was a familiar place, filled with memories of late night conversations (granted, of mostly you speaking and him listening), witnessed only by the large piles of paperwork. It started here and resulted in a natural, growing fondness kept secret to all except you two and the moon looking in from the window. 
This man was your squad leader, your commander, your trusted comrade. There was no need to be afraid-- Not unless of course, you held the potential to shatter such damn a delicate relationship.
And you did. 
Was it worth it?
Your gaze gravitated towards the center of the room where the Lance Corporal sat. And in that instant, your smile evaporated instantly. He placed his pen down, gracefully resting his cheek on his fist and lazily tossing the raven locks out of his eyes-- they landed on you, piercing yet drowsy and indifferent upon first glance. He was beautiful, as always. The allure was nearly sickening; unfair to the rest of the world.
Looking closer, however, he was anything but relaxed. The observant eye could see his countenance stirred something different. He seemed sharp and focused, ready to dart out and wrap himself around your heart, squeezing tighter with every breath you took. And you felt it-- the heart palpitations, which got worse at the sight of him.
He seemed… different. Dangerous, like a storm stirring in the distance, and the inevitable downpour that comes with it. The dark circles under his eyes told tales about the insomnia; a fresh cup of caffeinated black tea even rested on his left, steam rising out of it. And whilst attraction was undeniable, your concern always came first.
Levi was never quite good at getting proper rest before a mission.
“(Y/N),” The word was breathy, yet his voice was rough.
You shuffled in your spot, your name on his tongue making your stomach churn with desire.
Levi seemed to pick up on your affliction, getting out of his chair and gliding towards you. Everything happened fast and slow all at once, starting off with a momentaneous rush of air and  the collision of your back with the office wall. A small shriek filled the air, out of place against the silence; was that your voice? The pain should’ve been there, but it wasn’t.
Then the seconds dragged out. Levi was a new person, setting your skin aflame as he gripped your wrists and pinned them against the wall. His lips brushed your eartips, which turned red the instant the raven’s breath fanned over them. This normally reserved, disciplined man unleashed something you had never seen before.
“Finally ready to talk to me about why you’ve been acting so strange, brat?” he whispered.  
This wasn’t supposed to be so dirty. He was angry, but the mood was established in layers: something more sinister existed beneath.
The scent of fresh pine filled your nostrils until your brain went foggy. Levi was close--so close, and with the fact that you’ve been avoiding him mixed in with the fact that you missed him for it, all bets were off: there was no stopping the words that came out of your mouth next.
“There’s something I need to tell you,” you whispered back, looking him dead in the eyes, no fear this time.
His grip on your wrist slackened.
“Hm?”
You took in a deep breath, ready to leave it all on the line, and spoke.
“I like you a lot, sir. And not in a comradery type of way. I-I just thought I’d tell you before, you know, we leave tomorrow.” Your gaze found the floor again, too timid for your own good. But the statement was said, and it was finite; there was no turning away from it.
The Captain’s eyes went wide and gleamed brightly at you. His chest felt lighter and as he looked down at you in speechless awe, staring at anything but his face in your adorable embarrassment, he realized exactly why your absent look irked him those days ago. Why your lack of enthusiasm and lighthearted-ness gave him a strange sense of frustration. 
Levi never felt more awake, more hyper aware of his surroundings. 
The feeling of your chest pressed against him, the heat of those rosy cheeks, the pounding within his ribcage, the moon hitting your pretty face. With your figure in his arms, after the blissful seconds passed, everything felt, for once, okay.
Until it wasn’t.
Gaining the courage to look back up at him, you all but tore apart at the scowl on his face as demons flitted through his beautiful brain and polluted the image of happiness. Levi grew more indignant by the second, all but throwing your arms he held back at your sides like they were poison to the touch. 
Tears pooled in your eyes as the soft expression you didn’t get to see turned sour, disgusted-- the Captain’s lips curling into a snarl as he imagined what he could lose if he opened up his heart for this girl in front of him to take. The risk and pain of falling for someone, in the world the two of you lived in. And all the stoic man could think was how he allowed this charade to come so far.
No, he wouldn't allow it.
“Get out, (L/N)” he commanded, harsh and unforgiving.
You were trembling, body feeling detached from reality as it moved, convincing itself that it was simply a nightmare. Levi’s cruel demeanor all but shattered you as you looked wide-eyed and his anger grew, the short man pacing behind his desk and bringing a hand over his face. His free one crumpled into a fist, knuckles turning white as he slammed it on the wood, the loud bang making you jump; the fear, grief, confusion coming all at once until it choked you and your vision spotted black.
“I said GET OUT!”
The room stilled and Levi looked up to face you cowering near the door, a single tear rolling down your cheek. He stilled at the sight, the weight of his words dawning upon him.  
“I-I’m sorry,” you gasped before racing out of the room.
Had you looked back, you would’ve seen Levi’s outstretched hand betraying his body, desperately reaching out for you, gray eyes filled with pain.
But you knew now you’d never be dumb enough to spare him that second glance-- and maybe that was the right call, seeing as his feet moved in the direction you left, only to shut the door left askew in your wake.  
~~~
The Captain’s gaze was on you more than necessary, but it was clear the two of you had the same thought: You focused everything into this discussion, melting into the emotionally-detached soldier your duty commanded, just like Levi did. His words had no ulterior motive, no deeper meaning. They were monotonous and empty.
Or so you thought.
Levi stood up the second you came in, but your gaze fell to the ground in submission.
“Hange said you needed to see me, Captain?” your voice was small and weak; you kicked yourself for it. How pathetic.
“Damn you...”
The man said nothing more, brushing his fingers along your cheekbones and you everything hit you like whiplash, the memories. Levi ran them along your face, down to your chin to lift it gently, so that for once you’d let your eyes meet instead of looking at the ground like a coward.
When they did the man’s breath hitched in his throat, because although your (eye color) orbs were no longer as vibrant, they were still beautiful and entrancing; why hadn’t he ever appreciated them before? 
"I missed you, brat," he spoke firmly.
You felt a churn in your abdomen as you watched his eyes study the details of your face and take in every feature, committing it to memory painfully slow. You were paralyzed, his face inches away from yours and forcing buried emotions to resurface as months of restraint came undone. He didn’t speak, holding you delicately after not being this close for far too long and discerning what he’s been missing.  
“Um, Captain? What are you...?"
You bit your lip, feeling puzzled and confused as you remembered the hate in Levi's orbs the last time you saw him like this.
All you could see now was how quickly his emotions shifted from serenity to fury that fateful night, and as you recollected the way Levi lashed out, all chaos and fury, he retracted his hand.
And you flinched away.
The Captain froze.
“Don’t-- don’t fucking do that,” he growled, his urgency startling. “I would never hurt you, (Y/N).”
Your eyebrows furrowed, all inhibition thrown out the window the second Levi’s countenance flashed with hurt at your response to his touch. You let your fear go and emotions free at the irony of the raven’s statement. Your mind went into overdrive, recounting every instance you wanted to give up and leave, drown in yourself, give up on finding purpose in the aftermath of rejection and Squad Levi’s death and your permanent injury changing your way of life. Things you faced alone, because instead of rekindling any semblance of a relationship, Levi tossed everything away and berated you for feeling.
The man who resided here cut your heart expertisely like the countless swords he wielded then disposed. He did not have the right to look at you so kindly; did not have to right to fan the flames of false hope. But here he was, procrastinating until the very last day to take initiative regarding those actions.
“Why are you doing this?” you whispered, forgetting your composure.
“I’d advise you not to speak in riddles,” Levi spoke in a low and even voice, no real malice as he addressed you and tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear.
You took a deep breath and fought to remain calm, grabbing Levi's wrist to keep him from touching you.
“Please don’t toy with me, or mock my feelings like this. Why did you call me here? You made it plenty clear how you feel about me, Levi. What else is there to say?" you begged, the lack of closure driving you insane.
This was the first time you used his name, an unprecedented amount of spite and pain expressed through it, because you wanted Levi to remember this moment. It was over: that time of feeling sorry and ashamed of yourself for being nothing other than human. The remorse was gone, and the heartache was fleeting.
“Tell me, dammit!”
His was overflowing.
“You want to know how I really feel about you, (Y/N)!?” the Captain shouted, voice rising because for a man who relied on impulse and action on the battlefield it was fucking frustrating, watching the woman in front of him live this way for the simple reason that he was not good with words. "The thoughts that go through my head when you can't even bear to look at me?!"
"No, that's not what I asked. I already know that you don't--"
"--Fuck this."
Relying on instinct to guide him, Levi leaned forward and kissed you.
The second his lips met yours, you melted on the spot, knees giving out beneath you. Tongue sliding into your mouth, Levi simultaneously lifted you into the air, feeling lightheaded as you moaned into him, eagerly returning the kiss. His hands were everywhere, grasping at your waist, clutching the back of your head, running down your thighs. You were in such a state of euphoria that nothing else existed.
Your own digits threaded through Levi’s raven locks and pulled needily, emitting a growl from his throat as he bit down on your lower lip. He reveled in the feeling of your legs around his waist as your soft lips worked against his own, hungry and relentless. The kiss was passionate and you’d imagined it a million times over, but this-- Levi successfully ruined you for any other man.
The need for oxygen pulled you apart, Levi’s strong arms keeping you in the air as his eyes remained shut; he pecked your lips once, then twice, savoring the moment until it mournfully passed.
He was hesitant to break the silence, but you deserved it. You waited long enough to hear the truth, and he knew his time was running out; you weren’t going to wait for him forever.
“(Y/N)...” he began to speak, forehead resting on yours as he panted softly to catch his breath. “I dreamt of you last night. I have been for days.”
“Levi--”
“--Just listen,” he interrupted, unable to stop himself from kissing you softly once more. “Neither of us are running away this time.”
You fell silent as the man let you down, pulling you into his solid chest as you buried your face in his shirt, patiently listening. His calm heartbeat thrummed soothingly in your ears like a metronome.
“Isabel, Farlan, Oluo, Petra, Gunther, Eld. They all knew that what they meant to me. And I them."
One of the only things that made it easier to say goodbye, you thought with a bittersweet pang in your chest.
"With us, it's different. I died in every dream, (Y/N). Every one. And in every single one, you lived on believing I never loved you. Call me selfish, but I...”
You pulled away from the stoic man, searching his gaze as he trailed off. Shyly, you interlaced your fingers, his larger hand enveloping yours and you prayed to whoever was listening upstairs that all of this was real.
“I just can't leave until you understand...”
He clutched you impossibly tighter, eyes squeezing shut.
"...that you, are everything."
~~~ Extended Ending ~~~
A soft hum filled the air, the tune dreamy and sweet as you repeated the melody once again. You smiled warmly as hands wound around your waist, pulling you closer to a toned and shirtless Captain Levi, silken sheets tossed haphazardly on top of the two of you. His breath sent goosebumps on your neck as he kissed your shoulder gently, warmth deliciously intoxicating. 
Giggling now, you turned around to face him, the man’s onyx hair ticking you softly. You captured your lips in his with one smooth movement and snuggled closer, taking in the small slice of heaven that was home in his arms, legs tangled together. Feeling unbelievably content, like your heart might burst, you leaned forward and rubbed your nose against Levi's. 
Although he wasn't smiling, the look he was giving you revealed his own sensation of happiness.
“I never thought you’d be the cuddling type,” you remarked devilishly, scrunching up your nose as you teased him. 
Though your tone was lighthearted, you were painfully aware that the moment was ending. You internally cursed the sun as it started to set, orange light peeking in through the window shades to signal the coming of night. Levi said nothing, looking deeply into your eyes, and like always, it felt as if he could read the contents of your soul. 
But it wasn’t vulnerability you felt: on the contrary, you knew you would never find as safe a place as here. With him. Finally.  
“Levi...” you swallowed, humor all but gone. “Now you have to come home.” 
To emphasize your point you sat up on the bed, legs tucked neatly underneath you as you stared imperatively at your lover. 
“Mhm. We’ve wasted enough time,” he agreed, taking you by the wrist to pull you back on top of him, to bask in this personal paradise if only for another minute. 
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levisnackajack · 4 years ago
Text
The Wrath of War
Chapter Thirteen
Eden felt it deep in her bones that an expedition would be thrown at them soon. It kept her up at night, tossing and turning as she wondered how many lives would it cost for them to trudge beyond the walls once more.
She decided pushing herself during training would have been the best way to exhaust her thoughts. She sparred with every single squad member for hours on end. Then, she’d run laps until her muscles would give out and she no longer had any physical power to contemplate anything. 
“Get into pairs,” Levi had snapped one of those days, flexing his arms against his chest as he impatiently waited for his subordinates to match up. Jean raised an eyebrow as Eden shuffled towards him, smoothening her hair down as she cocked her own brow. 
“I’ve decided I want to keep today’s sparring session relaxing. I can’t be bothered to put in much effort, no offence.” 
Jean snorted in response; whacking Eden on her arm. “None taken. I can’t exactly be afraid of a toddler dressed up in soldier attire.” 
Eden tried her best to feign offence, but his comment made her burst out laughing. She kicked him in the shin when she finally calmed down and caught Levi’s glare with her peripheral vision. 
The girl took a deep breath, clenching her fists as she viciously began the sparring session with Jean. He was quick to move out of the way and she was faster at calculating her next move. It pleased her immensely when she managed to topple him to the floor, albeit their difference in body mass and size. 
“You’re lucky you’re just cute and I feel bad I might hurt you too badly,” Jean coughs as he grabbed Eden by the hand, using her as an anchor to pull himself up. She grinned widely at him, shaking her head as she stretched lazily. 
Connie and Sasha were messing about, Mikasa was with Eren, Krista and Armin were together whilst Levi watched over the pairs with extreme distaste. 
Or perhaps it was just boredom.
She listened to Levi correcting Connie’s stance and scolding Sasha for fooling around. Her amber eyes flickered away awkwardly back to Jean when the Captain’s own hard glare shifted towards her. Eden’s guts twisted uncomfortably and she wanted to heave. 
The vivid dream from a few days ago had also plagued her mind. It felt incredibly real, as though it was Levi’s real fingers dragging against her flesh as she had panted under him. The coldness of his touch made Eden’s spine shiver, goosebumps peppering against her skin. 
Her cheeks were always a tainted peachy shade and it was incredibly difficult for her to maintain eye contact with him for a long period of time. Thus, she decided it was best to avoid him as much as possible. 
“Eden, let’s go eat; we can train again later,” Jean pulled her back into reality, his hand squeezing her waist gently as she blinked slowly. 
“Alright, I guess you’re a masochist or something. I don’t know who else would want their asses kicked by a toddler,” Eden deepened her voice, mimicking Jean who in turn chuckled lightly. 
“Maybe I’m just into strong women who are able to defend themselves,” he replied back cynically, the corners of his lips tucking into a wicked smirk. Eden rolled her eyes, freezing her movements when she heard Captain Levi’s cool voice from behind them.
They saluted him formally and he nodded back stiffly. The wind ruffled Levi’s hair as he marched towards them, the strands flickering before his eyes- not that it seemed to bother him.
“You’re dismissed,” he scowled at Jean, jutting his chin back towards the castle, wordlessly commanding him to leave. The younger boy hesitantly accepted his order and left sulkily, glancing back at Eden who reassured him with a smile that never reached her almond eyes.
“When you’re done, come to my office brat,” Levi instructed her in a composed manner; his eye twitching at the sight of her wordlessly staring down at her boots as she followed him back to the headquarters. 
Her silence irked him deep down, but his indifferent mask stood stoically against his face. Levi brushed past her when Eden glanced at him quickly before mumbling her affirmation. She watched him stride away, the confidence in his walk practically oozing out of him; his white shirt clinging to his body exquisitely. Eden felt her heart strain painfully as she stood staring at him walk; deciding she’d take a longer path back to base.
With folded arms across her chest, Eden intently listened to Armin share his strategic plans with the rest of the group. They had all gathered in the Captain’s office, the parchment map neatly sprawled against his impeccably polished desk; Hange, said Captain and the rest of the squad circled around it. 
Armin nervously spoke, stuttering every once in a while, completely captivating his audience with his scheme talk. A few chosen squads- including part of Levi’s Squad- would venture out into the openness of Titan territory within Wall Maria. 
There had been countless reports along the Wall Rose claiming there had been a surplus amount of humanoid creatures seeping towards human territory from the South-East direction. 
It was a risky mission Commander Erwin had bestowed Hange- who in turn decided Armin was fittest for cooking up a plan of action. Eden’s heart faltered slightly as she thought about all the poor souls destined to lose their lives the following day. She contemplated whether there was someone else who was currently thinking about how they’re probably standing beside someone who’s got less than twenty four hours left in their hourglass. 
Hange took over when Armin was done with his share of opinions. Eden caught his stare and smiled warmly at him; the twitch of her lips faltering as her grim thoughts infested her mind. He grinned back at her, nervousness abstracting him from catching onto her contorted, saddened face. 
“This is a highly significant mission that could ultimately lead us one step closer to find out the secrets laying in your father’s basement,” Hange broke Eden’s reverie as her eyes settled on the key resting against his chest. “We’ve supposedly sealed Wall Rose’s breach. But, if the claims are true and there is a sudden increase in titan sightings; then maybe something else is going on,” Hange stroked her chin idly as she stared down at the faded parchment. 
A haughty “tch” slipped out of Levi’s lips as his grey eyes finally ripped themselves off the map. 
Once the meeting was adjourned, everyone made their way towards the exit of his spacious office and Eden followed sulkily. She missed being on the battlefield, knowing her actions could someday bring humanity closer to freedom; but she was deathly afraid of being paralyzed by grief once more. She cringed at the thought, her slowly footsteps leading her closer to the threshold. Until he called out her name. 
She tilted her chin to the side, staring down at the floor from the corner of her eye before listening to him irritably command for her to turn around and face him. 
Eden closed the door softly, trembling fingers engulfed around the icy metal of the handle, her hand flexing behind her back as she made her way closer to his desk. 
Her lungs began burning intensely as her cheeks flamed up upon meeting his levelled stare. She forced herself to hold his gaze, blinking back at him through velvet lashes. Levi’s jaw clicked, the muscles in his mouth growing tense. 
“I must say, you seem to be slacking,” Levi began, watching her carefully from behind his chair, fingers brushing against the headrest. Eden’s own bones clenched, her full lips concealing the way her teeth grinded against each other.
“Instead of improving your skills; your result levels are mediocre and stay the same...dare I say they’re worsening by your lack of concentration.”
His words hurt her wounded ego. Each syllable hurt more than the previous one- like salt being continuously pouring into an open gash. Eden’s knuckles grew as pale as the parchment still spread across his desk. 
“I don’t understand. Why didn’t you tell me this sooner? I could have worked on everything today,” Eden inquired in a sharp tone, ignoring the glare he sent her way.
“I guess I just came to the conclusion now. I think your skills are lacking and it seems like your concentration levels are far off, brat. It’s sickening to think that a fellow comrade could potentially lose their life because you were too busy daydreaming about other things,” Levi replied in a venomous tone, his monotonous voice making everything sound even worse to Eden. 
She stared at him wide-eyed and in horror. “With all due respect, Captain, but what the hell? I’ve proven myself to you countless of times; I’m ready to lay my life down if it meant saving others from that fate. I would never, ever allow myself to lose focus, especially during a life-or-death situation...”
“You should sit out of this mission. Spend the time thinking over your faults and then depending on the outcome, I’ll decide whether you’ll join us on the following expedition,” the Captain coolly cut through her words, craning his head to the side as he rubbed the bridge of his nose in irritation. 
His nonchalance made Eden seethe. 
“Why do I have to sit out of this when I’ve demonstrated that I can handle this? I don’t want to stay here...-” 
“This is an order, Eden, we’re not negotiating here,” he lashed out at her, albeit his consistent, unbrokenly-calm reverie. “I will not have anyone killed out there because of you.” 
His words poisoned her heart. She was so taken aback, she physically had to force herself to stay on her feet- her mind growing murky. Her mind flashed back to Petra and Oluo, Eld and Gunther. 
“Excuse me? Are you actually trying to insinuate that the death of your comrades were my doing? I was smashed against a tree by a 14-meter tall titan and you’re really going to turn around and blame their deaths on me?” Eden’s voice came out high-pitched and broken as she slowly edged closer to the desk. 
“After you saw how hard it was for me to accept their deaths, you’re going to turn round and saying the one thing I never thought I’d hear you say...” Eden’s eyes burned with tears as she violently blinked them away, the familiar anger Levi so comfortably sparked inside her grew lit once more. 
She shook under her clothes, the tremors sending jolts of adrenaline through her as she desperately tried to keep her cool; to no avail. 
His words had caused a different type of heartbreak within her soul.
She extended her arms to keep herself from falling, her body leaning in over the desk as she stared at him through infuriated, betrayed eyes. “How dare you try to blame this on me?” 
Levi finally looked back at her, his own grey eyes enlarging ever so slightly as he met a pair of hazel eyes filled with an unfamiliar fire that he could swear he had never known before. 
He challenged her wordlessly and it took all within her not to flinch and break under his stare. 
But Eden knew her limits and when he scoffed under his breath; that border was long forgotten and overpassed. She ripped the map off the desk, hauling it to the floor before grabbing the empty tea cup and smashing it against the wall behind Levi. 
The man did not flinch as he watched Eden stalk around the desk, her expression contorted into one revealing immense anger. 
“You keep telling me you want to see me fight and give my all, right? Well, let me prove to you that I’m a soldier who’s willing to sacrifice myself for the sake of the greater good.” Eden aimed to punch his face, wincing slightly when he casually seized her wrist, twisting her round until her back collided with his chest. His hot breath tickled her neck as she writhed against him. 
Using her elbow, she shoved the bone into his ribs and used the one split millisecond she had whilst Levi was recoiling to spiral out of his arms and aim a kick towards his face. 
But no matter how unanticipated her moves were, Levi was always one step ahead of her. She snarled in frustration as he blocked her upper-cut punch, both of his hands pressing against her collarbones as he shoved her hard against the wall; knocking the wind out of her lungs. 
He snaked his fingers around her wrists as he pinned them against the wall, forearms pressing against her arm as she shuffled between him and the wall. 
“Are you going to behave or do I need to tie you up, brat?” Levi muttered, tilting his head upwards, eyes holding hers as he kept Eden pinned with enough force to make her limbs go numb. 
She huffed under his grasp and suddenly it dawned to her how incredibly foolish she had been acting. But his words, his indifferent tone; it caused her so much pain, she didn’t feel like she had it in her heart to ever forgive him. 
Eden could practically taste the tension in the air. It settled around them like fog, clogging her lungs and her ability to think properly. Her chest rose and fell rapidly, heart voraciously beating against her ribcage. 
The girl was close enough to see that Levi’s eye color was a concoction of grey and blue. She searched every inch of his face as he immobilized her against the wall, iron grip never faltering. 
Hazel eyes flickered towards downturned lips causing her own lips to part slightly. 
Scrunching her eyes shut, she shoved him hard and he stumbled back. Eden stared at him dumbfounded; completely not expecting his steps to falter. This was perhaps the first time she had caught him off guard. 
She darted towards the door, gasping shakily when Levi grabbed her by the elbow, pulling her away from the exit. 
“You don’t just start shit like this and then leave whenever you please,” he growled under his breath, brows scrunched together as he clenched his jaw tightly. Eden pulled her arm out of his grasp, glaring back at him before turning to head towards the exit at a faster pace. 
Edging closer to the door; she violently spun around by the grip he inflicted upon the back of her neck, pulling her back towards him. 
“Don’t walk away from me,” Levi said through gritted teeth, watching in wonder as Eden’s face reddened in fury. She shook her head forcibly and grabbed his hand. He stared at her haughtily as she yanked his hand off her skin before sprinting out of the office. 
She vaguely heard Levi call her by her name and after reaching a few meters outside his office, she slammed into a tall lean figure. 
“Eden, what the hell?” Jean asked in a perplexed voice as he pulled her back onto her feet; his grip tightening when his gentle eyes met the hard glare of the Captain. 
Jean’s eyes shifted from Levi’s menacing stare to Eden’s troubled ones and with gritted teeth, he went to step towards their superior. 
Eden leaped in front of him, gripping his sleeve tightly as she wordlessly told him he was about to make the gravest mistake of his life. Jean hesitated, but nonetheless took a step back; his insides burning with immense rage when Levi’s brow raised in a vexing way. 
The girl continued pulling at Jean’s sleeve silently, leading him away from the Captain’s office. She craned her neck to peak back towards him; his stone-cold eyes meeting hers before he slammed the door of his office shut. 
“I don’t want to talk about it,” Eden repeated after Jean continuously urged her to reveal the outcome of her hour with Levi, but no matter how hard he pressed her, she did not back down. “Just a stupid quarrel. He told me to sit this expedition out instead of joining you guys tomorrow...” 
Jean huffed under his breath as he walked her back to her bedroom. His forearm rested against the frame of the open door as he stared down at Eden with a frown.
“I can stay and hang out with you, if you’d like?” Jean muttered out as she wrapped her arms around his waist. 
“No, Jeanie-boy, you need to rest, you have a long few days ahead of you.” He rested his arm around her shoulders as he pulled her closer. 
“Admit it, you’ll miss me.” 
Eden smirked as she pulled away gently, biting on her bottom lip. “Maybe just a little bit.” 
Bidding each other good night, Eden closed the door lightly before changing into her oversized shirt and shorts and throwing herself into bed. 
Hours had passed and she could not stop thinking about everything. About the expedition, about Levi...and then Jean...and then Levi again. She groaned, thinking back to Jean’s words earlier that evening. 
Quietly padding through the dead hallways, her heart ached as she thought back to her altercation with Levi. It took all within her not to swerve her body into his offices’ direction as she continued straight ahead. 
The girl quietly waited outside his door until it slowly cracked open.
“Eden?” 
She looked up at him, blinking at the sight of his bare, lean chest, the way his muscles rippled when he stretched. 
“Jean, do you want to hang out?” 
He groggily rubbed his eyes before letting go of a breathy laugh, moving to the side, admitting her entrance. He was dressed in just sweatpants, the v-line on his body highly defined. It made Eden’s cheeks grow pink as she silently thanked the dimness surrounding them. 
Pulling her knees against her chest, Eden settled her back against the wall as Jean leaned back against his headboard. The sat in comfortable silence until his deep voice brought her back into the room. 
“Listen, are you sure you’re okay? I swear, if that man tried to hurt you in any sort of way, I will...-”
“I already told you, it was nothing. You know me, I just get upset very easily and I don’t like being put into time-out,” she replied hastily, running a hand through her freed locks as Jean watched her. “Besides, I wouldn’t want to risk your position in his squad just for me.” 
He snorted, lips curling upwards mischievously. “Maybe I’m just using you as an excuse to fight with the Captain and then once I get kicked out, I’ll form my own squad. Then, I’ll have you recruited.” Eden laughed at his words, gently shaking her head as he scowled at her. 
“Yeah, you’re right. As if Levi would allow me to transfer you into my own squad.” 
“Oh sure, because that was the only fault in your plan, right?” 
“Yeah yeah yeah,” he brushed her words away as he chuckled and she moved to swat at his arm. But, Jean was quicker and he pulled Eden closer to him by her arm. 
Her eyes widened when she realized that she was straddling him. She awkwardly settled against him, causing him to grip her by the waist to stop her erratic movements. His fingers flicked the hair off her neck, settling around the curve of her throat. 
“What are you doing?” She sighed out when he tilted his head to the side, pulling her closer to his face by her neck. 
“I just wanna see something,” he muttered, thumb brushing against her jawline. Eden let out a low, shaky breath as she kept her eyes settled against his. 
Jean swiftly captured her lips with his own. The kiss was tender and gentle. It made Eden melt away within the comforts of his bedroom; far away from the unknown deep waters that’s every other aspect of her life. He pulled her closer by the waist, his toned arm snaking around the small of her back as she shifted in his lap. 
A moment later, she ripped her lips away from his, gasping for air; her forehead pressed against his as he waited for her patiently, eyes closed, taking in her sweet taste. 
Eden’s arms were looped around Jean’s neck, her chest pressed against his as her face scrunched up at the forbidden thoughts beginning to plague her mind. She wanted to cry out in frustration as her mind imagined stone-grey eyes glaring at her. 
She swore she could taste unsweetened black tea on her lips as her mind messed with her, bringing out images of Levi. His captivating stare, his constantly downturned lips, the dark circles under his eyes made Eden feel nauseous with emotions. 
Her lips collided with Jean’s in a harsher, more vicious manner. It was as though she no longer needed to breath, she needed something more to succumb to her unquenchable, carnal thirst. Soft moans and mewls escaped in between her heated, desperate kisses as she tried to rid herself of the intensely grey, sunken eyes that could not be erased from her mind. 
Jean let out a groan when she tucked on his hair, feeling his sharp undercut graze against her fingertips. Through closed eyes, Eden imagined the stark contrast of straight, charcoal-black hair against her pale fingertips; forcing her grip to grow stronger. 
Her brows were scrunched together and her eyes were tightly squeezed shut. A single teardrop managed to wet her velveteen lashes as she drowned in the idea of her lethal Captain under her. 
Yes, this is a Levi x Reader story. But, in this household, we take the enemies-to-lovers/ slow burn tropes v v v seriously. Stick around for more and thank you to everyone who’s taken the time to read the story! xx 
Tags: @idiot-juice-enthusiast 
Story in AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28919136/chapters/70952145
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writingsofmyimagination · 4 years ago
Text
Instinct |6|
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Levi x Reader
Summary: An unwelcome(ish) blast from the Captain’s trainee days comes back to the Scouting Regiment and old habits die hard.
Instinct: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 |
So I decided to carry on with the series. Bit of a time jump... now around Chapter 72 time :)
tags: @nefelimalfoy​ @beautifulimperfections13​ @pjimochi​ @submissive-bangtan​
Enjoy :)
Words:3232
Warnings: Swearing (Obvs), Smut, Smut -Pretty Sub Levi…..Like Oooof!
“Sooo, how did it go with Erwin, I assume you tried again to convince him to stay” Levi and you merged to walk the same direction in the dusty courtyard. Green cape briskly swept over your shoulder as the wind nipped at your forearms; little pin pricks of cold. The temperature measured equally in Levi’s dark face; hair half drooped over his forehead. The orange hue from all the lamps casting a shadow covering a scowl which quickly came into view.
“That good huh?” you added, trying to coax blood out of a stone.
“Those two brats just don’t stop” The stone completing dodging the question.
Oh
“Again!?” Eyes rolling.
“You should just let them go for it; they’d tire themselves out eventually”
“Ugh… if I didn’t need to make sure his energy was fully preserved for tomorrow I would” Levi unburdened you of the large unopened bottle of vodka from under your arm.
“Corporal YL/N” Erwin called as he added another walking body to the courtyard.
“I’ll catch up” You offered Levi as he’d already turned his back to you and walked off. The trio of Mikasa, Eren and Armin bundled out of the canteen hall in a cheery ball of jest.
“Hey suicidal maniac!” Jean called propping the canteen door open with his foot, hand gripped around a green survey corp jacket.
“You forgot this” Jacket launched quicker than Eren could react. You rushed over before Eren had finished screaming ‘You little…’. Your fist tight around Eren’s. You twisted his arm manipulating him to the ground before he could strike.
“Aaah” Eren wailed as he picked himself up from the dirt.
“Jean, extra clean up duty” His face shadowed with annoyance; Eren’s on the other hand brightened.
“Eren after this mission cleaning duty with Levi wherever he chooses”. It was now Eren’s turn for his face to drop and Jean’s to brighten in a balanced 360.
“Yes Corporal” They both mumbled heads down. Jean disappeared back to the canteen and Eren slumped down on the steps next to Mikasa and Armin.
“Sorry Commander” Returning to where you were called.
“It’s quite alright, ready for tomorrow?”
“As ready as you can be” Your response was still yet polite.
“Oh come on Y/N, I know your pumped, no need to be restrained for me. Anyway, I just wanted to assure you that I will be commanding tomorrows mission Despite the chattering going through the core at present”
“Sir, honestly,  I wouldn’t expect anything less, this is your dream too”
“Levi tried to convince me otherwise, to his failure of course”
“He did mention it, mostly in the form of him being quieter and slightly grumpier than normal”
A slight knowing smile crept minutely onto Erwin’s lips.
“I thought as much, anyway, enjoy your night. I assume the bottle Levi stropped off with was for you”
“Most definitely more for me. Good night commander. Rest well”.
The trio were still sat perched on the steps. Armin, the forever motivator of life beyond the walls exciting the others. The glimmer of hope sprinkled on their expressions light bright fairy dust a refreshing view. Even on Mikasa it was a sight to behold.
Entering the archway something black and still in the corner drew your attention. Head dropped down, his sullen gaze lightened, a few creases less on his face when the confusion struck yours.
“Didn’t know earwigging was your thing” You said, quieter to not alert the three kids. Levi shuffled himself off the floor and vigorously brushed himself down, slight creases grew in his forehead at checking his hands. He gave one more rushed wipe down before you both made your way to his office
“I wasn’t earwigging… I was listening to the brats be hopeful and dream about the future” There was slight distaste scattered through his words.
“Sooooo earwigging…. And is that a bad thing?” The over-dramatic roll of his eyes was heard like a sassy echo in the bare office he liked to squirrel away in.
All that was scattered on the wooden table to the back of the room was a few sheets of paper with diagrams, drawing, indecipherable scribbles that only Levi could understand.
He slumped himself down onto the armed wooden chair, scowl still present staring blankly down at the desk.
Jeez he really is in a grump.
“Okay captain scowl!” You began.
“Erwin needs this, I’m sure he is more than aware that this could potentially be his last mission. He’s not the type to sit back the same way you aren’t” Your arms now folded, strength firm in your stance.
“But his loss would be detrimental to humanity, guy is a damn genius”
“Yeessss he’s a genius, will it be a huge hit, course it will, but he wouldn’t be going if he knew that the Corps wouldn’t be in good hands if something were to happen” He shuffled the papers into a somewhat neater pile and placed them meticulously down in the centre of the table.
“I suppose your right” He conceded twiddling a pencil through his fingers.
“Aren’t I always?” Whisky frosting half of the small tumbler a golden brown which soon disappeared when the glass touched your lips.
“Now....” hanging onto the word diffusing into something much more sultry
You waltzed over to his desk, fingers already teasing undone the buttons of your blouse.
“Can you please stop thinking about work, it’s going to be a challenging day tomorrow as it is” you pleaded leaning against his desk facing him. The final button undone, sight teasing him away from his concentration. Holding the sides of the shirt like curtains to a happier Levi.
“Understatement” He mumbled, his finger finding its way through a belt loop, corner of his lips turning up to a wicked smirk, just how you like them.
“It’s also an understatement that you’re such a tease” he added, the shimmering glaze of mischief reflecting in his eyes coaxed a raised eyebrow with the victorious tinge of your lips.
“Oh Soo I am tempting you then?” his leg now in between yours, his hand resting on your sides
“Perhaps” He tugged at your bra with strong determined hands freeing your breast for his teeth to lightly toy with. Your only was response to hum in approval.
“LEEEVVIIII!” A high wailed cry barely muffled by the dark wooden door.
“Shit!” the pair of you breathed unanimously. You didn’t have any time to fix any of your clothing predicament before the door crashed open and Hanje burst in. To her you were just lent up against Levi’s desk with your arms folder; Levi remained in the chair stoic as ever.
Don’t come round!, don’t come round!
Panicked thoughts spun through your mind like a pin wheel.
“What do you want Hanje?” Annoyance slipping over Levi’s voice coating of distaste thoroughly embedded through it.
“I just wanted to let you know everything is ready for tomorrow”
That’s oddly calm considering her entrance.
Hanje looked mildy uncomfortable, her cheeks were slightly puffed, eyes were wide and flitty. Thankfully she’d not move from where she stopped on the right side of the desk.
You and Levi both waited a beat
“AREN’T YOU BOTH SOOO EXCITED!” She finally burst, her body fully exploding with movement. High pitched; almost intolerable. Levi’s eyes rolled. Obviously.
There we go.
“We’re going to THE BASEMENT!” she continued, her hyped up voice became distant as it was drowned out by the concentration of your fingers being sly in trying to do your buttons up. Levi thankfully battered no eyelids at your miniscule movements. Your shoulders dropped, reveal crisis averted.
“I’m aware” Levi droned
“Is Levi not too much of a damn stone to be spending all this time with? If I didn’t know Levi had such a small capacity for emotions, I’d say you two are a thing”
Hilarious. He may not have the massive heart…
“Can you actually imagine?” You laughed competing with her hysterics.
“Jesus Christ Ladies!” Levi complained tutting.
“I’m sorry Levi” Hanje managed still trying to control her laughter turning and leaving humming way too loudly on her exit.
“Can you not encourage that damn woman” He whined, stood out of his chair encroaching on your personal space, stealing a hard kiss from you.
“I thing you’ll find I’m helping our cover.” The two of you quickly became absorbed into each other again. As cold as he could be, his body never failed to be the warmth pressed against you that you needed.
“I think you’re a pain in my ass” he quipped back.
A pain in his ass he couldn’t let go of
“If you take me upstairs, I will be” You tested. His smirk against your lips was matched, pupils growing pools of craving.
Door clicked shut on the rest of the world, his shirt racing to the floor before you could tussle the buttons of your own shirt back open. The back of your legs hitting the rough surface of the table, the contact not disrupting the soft pressure of his lips dancing with yours; his bottom lip catching numerous times between the gentle tug of your teeth. The harsh pillows didn’t linger on your lips for long. The nips at your neck quickly ached with desperation, impatience crying through the hands fumbling at your trouser buttons. Your trousers pooled at the floor; strong grip at your waist encouraging you half onto the table. You placed a stern hand on his chest in halt.
“What’s wrong?” He breathed through staggered breathes. You answered with movement grabbing the towel from the dresser and coating the table.
“I’m not getting splinters for you. On your knees” You ordered sliding up onto the table after slipping of your underwear in a seductive swoop. Levi on his knees focused glistened eyes zoning on your every small movement. His glare ran ablaze with your foot firm on his shoulder, drinking in the view of soft pale skin. The thighs he knew looked so pretty with blossoming red flower bruises. The way he loved to make them quiver; you whimpering his name.
“Always so patient” you praised. His insides were clenched, teetering on the edge of desperation. Dying for your call. He swallowed hard, with the insatiable thirst had ravaging over him. This may have combusted when your hand dipped between your own thighs. Humanities strongest kneeling desperate on the floor beneath you trying to harness all the will to stay put.
“Tell me what you want” you offered your hand, foot sliding of his shoulder.  His mouth enveloped round the wetness of your fingers; a deep hum vibrated through his throat.
Your legs now parted with him snug in-between. He was making you wait for his answer.
“Well?” He stilled for a moment completely faking to ponder. Hands ghosting up your lower leg, your soft skin only imploring him higher. Your index finger stroking come hither under his chin
“Mmm” The pair of you mumbled, white knuckles gripped his shoulders. Even with your lips pressed together you could feel the wicked way the edges of his lips curled upwards.
“This” he managed, drowning out your whine. Already feeling the controlled digits inside pressing to your walls.
“Be more specific or you get nothing” pleasant strain and held back whines hidden terribly in your voice.
“Ugh” Levi complained.
“Did you roll your eyes at me?”
“On the chair!”. Your tone snapper quicker than a whip.
“You can’t tell me what you want, then I’m just going to keep giving until I’m finished with you”
“Hands behind your back until I say otherwise” you added, hands prying his thighs wider.
“Eyes on me baby” He tried not to blink. Forcing himself to look down, refusing his eyes to roll upward as you’d dropped to your knees. Tongue licking a slow stripe on the underside of his member. His bottom lip catching between his teeth. He could only enjoy the sweet warmth of your mouth for a few blissful moments before his bottom lip puffed out in hardcore sulk mode. You turned from him, sweeping your hair to the front of your shoulder carefully balancing your weight as you lowered yourself onto him; not how he’d like. You’d sat on his lap purposely avoiding him. Your hips circled, your head back resting the side of his neck, his low whines now right at the shell of your ear.
“Oh did you think I’d give it up that easy?”
“Don’t think so ….”
You thumb teased over the tip of his cock before honing your attention to focus on the movement of your hips”
“Please” He whined
“I’ve hardly done anything” You toyed. Knowing full well it didn’t matter; not with the fact the pair of you had had little time over the last week or so. It was all just too easy to get to him.
“Mmm…no. You can sit there and feel me.”
Frustration began seething though his controlled breaths, hips trying to match your movements under your weight. Your skin was heating up, but yet you could almost shiver with how sparked your nerve endings were. His lips stuttering soundlessly
“Something you wanna say?”
“Please just cum on me…”
//
Pale milky wax in droplets solidified on his chest. Each one earned a hiss past his lips with the occasional curse chucked into the air for measure. Moisture gathered where his hair met his skin and shone in the flickering candlelight
Small red flower patches blossomed so prettily when the wax dropped of his skin. Your lips followed the beautiful field to the buds on his chest. His desperate groan elicited at the grip of your teeth his hips couldn’t help but buck up into you.
“Levi…Fuck!” Finally allowing yourself to sink down onto him, exasperated pants omitted by both of you in solace.
“Please let me have you now, I need yooou” Your hands still at his chest, hips circling at a painful pace. Torturous eyes hand in hand with the unforgiving smirk beaming.
“But I love it when you’re so desperate, you’ll be begging me to stop when you’re too sensitive”
“How many times can you cum before you can’t take it anymore?” Levi had a damn near ridiculous refractory period, in addition to his extraordinary strength and healing speed. You loved it and saw it as a fun challenge to push it.
//
“Had enough? More?” You asked the writhing body under you, smirk still strong on your face. Moans choked in his throat. His stomach drizzled with himself, the rest of him you wiped away from around your lips. The veins in his neck jumping as he turned to you, his chest rising and falling in steadying moves. The unmistakeable moisture filled eyes, water gathering at the corners in frustrated droplets. His muscles quivering under your touch, so flooded with sensitivity.
“You” he whined, voice becoming dryer and crying with desperation with each passing breathe.
“Oh you think you can go one more with me?” You’d allowed yourself very little. Your walls were throbbing against nothing. The tension that had filled your muscles the tightly wound fibres needed an outlet.
The exhausted body beneath you moved with a sudden refilled confidence and stability knocking you back. Your hands locked behind his neck; you were half sat up and supported through his hand at your lower back. A fresh accelerated fire fight raging behind the dark orbs of his eyes, you’d pushed him, he’d had enough. Your cry had the hint of a giggle finally having him inside you, cheeky smile under your bit lip.
“Stop being a tortuous brat, ride me, make yourself cum around me or swear to god”
“Swear to god what?” you challenged clenching around him. His response; hissing with regret. Over-sensitivity pained in his features; brows knitted together as yours widened with your smile.
“Mmm” the pained hum melted right in your ear. Melted chocolate dripping of a soft pink marshmallow. Unwavering stable hand still solid supporting you. Your weight cradled into him, fingertips digging into his shoulder blades. Finally allowing your hips to spiral, unwinding all the patience you’ve exercised. Currents of heated heavy breaths washed across your chest. He ceased to challenge with any more words. Chest pushed against his; heat gathering in moist droplets between you.
You stole as many messy kisses in-between your moans and whines as you could; Levi had resorted to mostly grunts, his hips movements becoming staggered, each thrust becoming harder but seemingly more exhaustive. You shifted your weight forward. You’d felt his muscles begin to shake.  Levi was now on his back hair falling against the pillow as beautiful black spikes.
“God you feel so good” You whined rolling your hips. Hands planted cupped around his thighs, gripping hard nails leaving crescents in the muscled flesh. With your back arched, chest bare and vulnerable to the dragged out firm knead of Levi’s hands. His arms dropped to cradle your hips slowing them down.
“Too much for you baby?” You cooed sliding your hands to his chest, one creeping further to sit at his throat.
“Mmmhm…Don’t ……” He warned. You were never going heed his warning; you tightened your grip disobeying the pressure at your hips and rocking him freefalling off that cliff. His head rolled back harsh against the mattress. The intoxicating chimera of blissful pain bled into relief. Hearing the beautiful stuttering sounds and pants of Levi falling apart had you equally calling out his name with jaggged breaths.
//
You were gently coaxed out of sleep by floating plump kisses at your shoulders, a wandering breeze of his hand cloaking round your waist.
“Why does time go so fast” you mumbled, shifting onto your back. The cotton sheets were fresh against your exposed chest, cooled by the crisp air flowing in through the open window. High positive chirps from the birds living un-unbeknown to the burdens of the day ahead.
“Wait how come you’re not up and dressed and kicking me out of bed earlier than necessary?” The pleasant surprise had you smiling more sweetly than you’d like him to see and you felt more peace than you’d normally allow yourself.
The peace went to full blown serenity like a spring morning trickling stream when his lips half turned up followed by a soft chuckle oozing with acknowledgement.
“Jeez you moan when I up and leave and moan when I stay, am I ever going to get a break with you?” Levi huffed way to animatedly to suit him; he kicked off the sheets and went to lug himself out of the bed. You tugged him back towards you just off balance to get him on his back to secure your thighs at his hips.
“Do you honestly wanna break from this?”  Flicking your hair up in your grip allowing it to trickle loosely out of your hand. You fought his weight trying to push you off, which when he actually re-calibrated his balance he managed. One hand weakly holding your wrists together above your head. You were met with silence and a smirk worthy of the first ring of hell. He bounced off and slid his white shirt on. Neither of you spoke again until you dragged yourself to the bathroom.
“Annoyingly even when you act a brat I still can’t stay away. I’d would be weird without you now”
“Exactly”
Wait what?
94 notes · View notes
dreamy-heichou · 5 years ago
Note
hello dear! first of all, congratulations and thank you so much for the amazing reincarnation prompt lists! i was finding for those lists and you helped me a lot :) if you feel like writing, may i please request 2,4,66 with pure angst? take your time as much as you want, once again thank you!❤️❤️
Thank you Anon! ♥ I’m glad you liked my prompt list and that I was able to help you! :)
I’m so sorry it took me so long to write your prompts, I was doing too many things at the same time, but here it is finally! Not being able to give my babies a happy ending was really hard tbh… I hope you’ll enjoy this angsty drabble!
2: “You don’t… remember?” 
4: “Why is he calling you by a different name?”
66: “Did you think I would run into your arms?”
WARNING: Manga spoilers ahead, be careful if you’re not up to date with the manga! Also, I need to warn you for dark content because of the mental instability of one of the character!
************
“Eren…?”
Levi stops in his tracks the moment he sees a tall brunet walk not very far from him. He looks a little older than in his memories, probably around his mid-twenties, but he would recognize the man anywhere. His features are the same as he remembers: strong jawline, straight nose, broad shoulders and narrow hips; his long chocolate brown hair tied in a low ponytail. The brunet has haunted his dreams for years now, bringing back to the surface feelings of despair, regret, affection, and more importantly, hope.
Back then, Eren was his precious and only hope, giving him the strength to move forward when everything seemed to have turned into chaos. Their initial goal of killing all the titans changed dramatically the moment they discovered Eren’s father’s books in his basement, revealing the existence of humans outside of the walls, an entire civilization that wanted nothing more than to annihilate every last one of them. In this mess, however, there had always been one constant, and it was Eren.
Levi never thought he would be able to see the man in this life. He understood from a very young age what his dreams were about, what they meant, but it is only when he came across two of his past friends that he realized there is a possibility to see the young man once again. As he talked with Hanji and Erwin, realizing they both remember the same cruel world, he understood he had a chance.
He can maybe one day run into Eren and find his hope again.
The raven’s body starts moving forward before he can process what is happening. He rushes after the silhouette he just saw, calling his name in the hope of drawing Eren’s attention and make it easier to catch up with him. The brunet, however, doesn’t stop and keeps on walking, not even looking back as Levi desperately runs after him in the crowd.
“Eren!” Levi yells for at least the tenth time as he is finally able to put one hand on the man’s shoulder to stop him.
The raven is caught off guard as Eren smacks his hand away, looking at him with a murderous glint in his eyes, his eyebrows furrowed in anger and his lips tightly pressed together. It takes a moment for Levi to recover from the shock, holding his hand in front of his chest, feeling his skin sting from the blow.
“Ere–”
“Who the fuck are you?” Eren harshly cuts him off, his voice a low growl.
Levi feels his body freeze as he realizes what Eren’s words imply. He tries to regulate his breathing, a little breathless after his running, feeling his legs shiver after the effort he put them through. He isn’t as in shape as he used to be and his muscles scream in pain as a reminder of that.
“You- You don’t… remember?” Levi manages to ask, his face a perfect reflection of both his confusion and distress.
Eren squints his eyes, rendering them into two small slits as he looks over the man in front of him. Levi shivers under his scrutiny, not used to being the object of such hatred, especially coming from the tall man. He can still remember the fire he saw into those green eyes the first time he saw Eren in a dungeon, it had intrigued him, but what he can see in Eren’s eyes now is… different. It’s not even a fire, nothing like the determination he had witnessed. It’s only pure hatred and contempt.
Levi gulps, feeling even smaller than he already is, when a high-pitched voice draws his attention away from the intense glare directed at him.
“Hey, Drew, who’s that?”
Levi’s eyes widen as he realizes they weren’t alone from the beginning, and he wonders how he didn’t see the woman standing next to Eren when she is practically glued to his side. Her face is covered in makeup – too much from Levi’s perspective, her eyelashes at least double the length of natural ones and her lips a glossy velvet red. She is wearing a mini-skirt revealing thin legs and a blouse that hardly covers her chest, which is tightly pressed against Eren’s arms. She gives Levi the stink-eye before batting her eyelashes at the brunet.
“Why did he call you by a different name?” She practically purrs as an attempt to catch his attention.
Eren hardly spares her a glance, his eyes still drilling holes in the raven’s head, the latter trying his best not to look away in front of such a blatant display of superiority. After a few minutes and more coaxing from the girl, who is obviously growing annoyed at the exchange, Eren turns his back to Levi, putting his hands in his pockets as he slowly walks away with the woman.
“He confused me with someone else. I don’t know him.”
Levi can only watch as Eren is moving further and further from him, his mind still trying to process what happened. He instantly freezes on the spot when Eren gives him one last glance, his eyes cold and menacing, shattering all hope Levi might had before this instant in a matter of seconds.
Ever since he found Hanji and Erwin, Levi was hopeful of one day seeing Eren again. He didn’t actively look for him, but he has always wondered if he will be able to find the brunet too and have him back in his life. And if that day shall happen, he imagined Eren to be the same as in his memories. Hanji and Erwin are the same, so why not him as well? Of course, there are still differences since their lives and upbringings are different, the same goes for Levi as well, but overall, they remain very similar to how he remembers them. Their essences are the same, Levi’s essence is the same, but Eren’s…
This isn’t Eren. Or more precisely, it isn’t his Eren. It isn’t the man he remembers, full of determination and filled with compassion for the people around him. It is a completely different man, cold and indifferent, with nothing but disdain in his eyes. Somehow, for reasons he can’t comprehend, Eren’s essence is different.
The man he just met had been someone else wearing Eren’s face.
Levi tries not to think about his encounter with Eren, but it ends up being nearly impossible. It keeps bothering him and he can’t erase Eren’s cold eyes and angry expression from his mind. He doesn’t talk about it with either Hanji or Erwin, preferring to keep it to himself, but his friends notice that something is wrong with him. Still, he keeps quiet, his meeting with Eren a secret he doesn’t feel like sharing.
***
One Friday night finds Levi wandering outside of his apartment, trying to change his mind with a bit of fresh air. The air is a little cold for an evening in the middle of April, but his coat and scarf keep him warm enough to tolerate it. A few other people are walking outside like him, probably on their way to meet friends somewhere in the city or simply going home after a long day of work. Levi pays them no mind until he spots a familiar silhouette in the crowd. It is almost like his eyes are attracted to the man, being able to find him in the middle of many unfamiliar faces.
Eren is walking down the street in his direction, this time alone, his hands in the pockets of his black hoodie. His hair is tied in a messy bun this time, but Levi tries to not let his eyes wander on his form too much. He turns around, not really in the mood for another surprise encounter, when he hears a deep voice resonating behind him.
“Hey! Wait!”
Levi keeps walking, trying to get away as far as possible from the man. He doesn’t want to think about the people Eren is probably on his way to spend the night with. He doesn’t want to hear his voice which seems to make his stomach fluster and his chest constrict. He isn’t as lucky, however. A hand carefully turns him around and he is met with an out of breath, smiling brunet, relief evident in his eyes as Levi stops and looks back at him.
“You’re the guy from last time!” Eren blurts, still trying to catch his breath.
“Uh… Yeah.”
“Seems like our roles are reversed this time, huh?” Eren quietly laughs.
Levi looks to the side, a little confused as to why Eren decided to run after him. He doesn’t seem as cold and wary as last time, his lips actually turned up in a smile, but Levi is still uncomfortable. This isn’t the Eren you remember, he chants in his head, trying to ward off the hope he can feel bubbling inside of him.
“Sorry, you’re probably wondering why I stopped you,” Eren clears his throat while rubbing his neck in a nervous habit. “I just wanted to apologize for last time. I was in a pretty bad mood and I took it out on you. So, uh, yeah… Sorry about that.”
Levi’s eyes widen at the sudden apology, his throat becoming tight and his mind a little fuzzy from the surprise. Eren seems embarrassed, looking at him before averting his eyes to the side, shifting his weight from one foot to the other as he waits for Levi to answer. It takes the raven a moment to get himself back together and reply to the brunet though.
“It’s fine. I- Sorry I bothered you that day.”
“Oh, it’s okay! Everyone makes mistakes!” Eren laughs once again, seeming to relax. “Actually, I wanted to do more than apologize. Like maybe buy you a drink if you’d like? I know a pretty good place just around the corner.”
Eren puts his hands back in his pockets, his attitude more confident but a shy smile on his face nonetheless. Levi is taken aback by the offer and tries to outweigh the pros and cons of his request. Is it really okay to hang out with someone who looks exactly like the man he used to have feelings for? Does he want to get to know this new version of Eren? Maybe it would be safer for him to refuse and just move on, but… there is a little voice inside of him that keeps saying: Why not?
“Just one drink! And if you want to leave after, no hard feelings, I’ll get it!” Eren tries again, sensing Levi’s hesitation.
“Fine,” Levi sighs, resigning himself, “one drink.”
Eren’s smile widens and he starts walking while making sure Levi is right behind him. The raven silently follows him, still mulling over his decision. He can’t shake off his curiosity. He knows Eren doesn’t remember, knows he is very much different, but that is why he wants to know more about this new him. Levi can’t keep on living his life knowing Eren is out there and not trying to make him a part of his life. He tried to do just that the last few days and it didn’t really work.
“I’m Andrew, by the way,” Eren says as he opens the door to a bar, the sound of slow, jazzy music reaching their ears, “but most people call me Drew.”
Levi can’t get around the idea of calling Eren by a different name, but he stores the information in his head in case he really needs to use it.
“I’m Levi.”
Eren directly goes to the counter to order drinks as Levi finds a table in a corner and gets himself comfortable. Soon, two glasses of beer arrive on their table and they start chatting, like two strangers getting to know each other, because that is technically what they are. Levi learns a little about Eren’s life, what he does for a living, his age, his hobbies, and Levi tells him about himself too. They finish their drinks pretty quickly and soon a second one follows, the raven having already decided to stay a little longer in the man’s company.
Eren is quite chatty, always bringing another subject on the table when they seem to run out of things to say on the one they were talking about, and Levi appreciates it. Talking with Eren seems easy, though there is something nagging at Levi. It’s probably the way Eren’s smile never reaches his eyes no matter how bright his face looks as he talks and laughs. Levi tries not to dwell on it too much, especially when he can feel himself getting a little light-headed.
How many drinks did he have?
He didn’t keep track, but it must have been too many because the next thing he knows, he is waking up in a bed which isn’t his in a room he doesn’t recognize. His head is pounding and he feels dizzy as he sits up, his memories hazy. He starts to panic, not knowing where he is nor how he ended up here. Where did Eren go? Is it his place?
Levi carefully stands, one hand holding his head as he feels it throbbing even more, and the other used to balance himself against the wall as his legs are heavy and wobbly. He eventually manages to exit the room he is in, and he carefully walks down a corridor until he reaches a large room which seems to be both a living room and an open kitchen. There, he spots a tall brown man and he feels his body sags with relief as he recognizes Eren.
“Oh! You’re up?” Eren says as he joins him, his face reflecting worry. “How are you feeling? You scared me back there!”
“I feel like a fucking train hit me,” Levi groans as he closes his eyes, his headache intensifying with the light. “What happened?”
“You completely passed out on me! I had no idea what to do, so I took you back to my place,” Eren explains to him. He then chuckles a little before adding, “You’re heavier than you look, by the way.”
“Sorry, I don’t remember drinking that much.”
Levi tries to take another step closer to the brunet but his body doesn’t seem to agree and he trips on his feet. Thankfully, Eren is there to catch him, and relief washes over him as he feels two strong hands holding his shoulders.
“Wow, easy there!” Eren makes sure Levi is stable before releasing him, his hands still open in front of him in case he needs to catch him a second time. “You want something to drink? Water? Coffee? Tea?”
“Tea, please,” Levi immediately answers. He passes a hand over his face and frowns as he feels his oily skin. “Ugh, I feel gross.”
Eren laughs at his remark as he starts making tea, “You’re welcome to use my shower, if you need to. It’s the door opposite my bedroom. And you can take whatever clothes you find inside my closet.”
Levi thanks him before going back from where he came. His legs are still a little unsteady, but he has a better balance now that he is getting used to it. Eren’s closet is built inside the bedroom’s wall, two big doors hiding its content from prying eyes. Levi rolls one to the side and peeks inside, trying to determine which clothes he can take. A fleeting thought that none of Eren’s clothes are going to fit him passes through his mind, but he disregards it as he can smell alcohol and tobacco on his own.
His eyes fall on a shelf where he can spot pajamas, and he reaches a hand to take a pair. As he does so, however, all the shelves start to shake and something falls on the top of his head. It didn’t hurt, thankfully, and Levi realizes why as he sees sheets of paper spread across the floor.
“Shit,” he hisses as he bends down to recover every page.
His eyes immediately catch drawings on the paper in his hands, and his brain freezes as he recognizes what the sketches are about. Titans. He can also identify the symbol of the Survey Corps, the Wings of Freedom, as well as a few faces he remembers from his old memories.
“Ahh, you weren’t supposed to see that,” a deep voice sighs behind him.
Levi instantly turns around to face the man, letting all the pages drop on the floor once again. The raven can feel his throat becoming dry as he sees Eren leaning against the door frame, his arms crossed in front of his chest, a small smile on his lips and a mysterious glint in his eyes. Suddenly, the man in front of him looks very different from the one he drank with a few hours ago, and a shiver runs down his spine as Levi realizes what it all means.
“You… You actually remember,” Levi exhales, not even phrasing it as a question. Eren’s smile widen and the raven can finally identify the glint in his eyes: excitement, madness.
“I was hoping to have my fun a little longer but,” Eren shrugs, coming closer to Levi who cannot help but back away at the movement, “I guess you found me out.”
Levi suddenly feels anger building up inside him and he growls back, “Why the fuck didn’t you say anything, Eren?” He insists on his name on purpose.
The brunet only laughs in front of his anger, and the sound of it makes Levi’s blood run cold.
“What is it, Levi? Were you sad I didn’t remember?” He comes even closer to the raven, backing him up against the wall. “Did you think I would run into your arms?”
Levi can’t help but flush at Eren’s words, both in embarrassment and shame, which earns him another chuckle from the man.
“You’re so pathetic, Levi,” Eren spits out, his eyes turning as cold as ice, looking more like the man he saw a few days ago. “You’ve been pathetic ever since Erwin died. Only talking about getting revenge and keeping your promise. The moment we eradicated all Titans from Paradis you became useless too. You almost ruined my plans when you went after Zeke.” Eren suddenly starts laughing, freezing Levi on the spot, his eyes unable to leave the maniacal grin on the brunet’s face. “Lucky for me, he did my dirty work. I was starting to wonder what I was going to do with you.”
Levi tries to push Eren away to get the hell out of this apartment, his survival instinct kicking in and telling him to run, but he can’t even make the man budge, still feeling dizzy and weak. It only makes the taller man laugh harder, who then proceeds to cage Levi between his body and the wall, both of his hands on either side of the raven’s head.
“My only regret is that I didn’t get to see you all bloody and mutilated,” Eren whispers, his forehead against Levi’s as he runs a finger down the raven’s cheek.
This isn’t Eren, Levi thinks over and over in his head. This can’t be Eren.
Levi has always known Eren was a monster, not because of his titan power, but because of his will and strength, of his determination. Levi saw it that day in the dungeon, the way Eren’s eyes shone with passion and anger, his soul bare for anyone to see. The soul of a monster. But the person in front of him isn’t the same. He is a monster, but he has no soul. Levi cannot see anything inside his eyes beside emptiness and cruelty. A cruelty his Eren didn’t possess.
Levi comes back to his senses as he feels Eren bite at his earlobe, making him hiss under the pain. He can feel his determination to leave fading as the buzz in his head intensifies from too much thinking.
Levi is trapped. He can’t escape, he has no way out. He is only a pray in front of his predator. Eren can do whatever he wants to him now, but it doesn’t matter. Levi has lost his last hope.
“So, what are you going to do, Captain?” Eren murmurs as his mouth goes lower, nipping at Levi’s skin.
Eren then sinks his teeth at the junction of his neck and shoulder, drawing blood, but Levi can’t seem to care anymore. The pain he feels from the bite isn’t painful enough to make him forget about his bleeding heart.
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leviackercanon · 6 years ago
Note
HCs about Levi with a titan shifter! S/o please! you’re doing great! ❤️❤️❤️
Thank you so much for your kindness !! I’ll keep trying my best !!! ♡(.◜ω◝.)♡
There will be 2 versions : a non-spoiler one and a spoiler one ! Those who are not manga readers, scroll up when you will reach the spoilers section ღゝ◡╹)ノ♡
Head(Story)canon : Levi x SO who is a titan shifter
Non-spoiler version (quite long ヾ(´・ ・`。)ノ)
How can I start without telling you that it was pretty bad when Levi found out you were a titan shifter ? (´;ω;`)
Oh... I can’t ! Because it was very bad  (sorry o(╥﹏╥)o)
You belonged to the survey corps but you weren’t a random soldier. Nope there was a titan inside of you and unlike Eren... You knew your c r i m e. You ate your mother when you were younger and even if some memories were blurry because of the shock, the memories were always reviving in your nightmares : how your mother explained that there was a special tradition in your family, the cannibalism, and she had to transmit you the titan inside of her and you would have to do the same later. How she was crying and screaming that she regretted her acts but she didn’t have the choice
And then she transformed you into a titan. When you regained consciousness... You felt a strange power running through your veines. And your mother was gone. You knew what you did and you were scattered for life.
After that you lived seperated from the others and you learned how to control your powers by yourself. You knew you were a titan shifter : someone who could transform into a conscious and intelligent titan. But not only you were scared of yourself, you were also disgusted with what you were. Worst : titans were enemies if people knew your secret, you would be killed as the enemy number one.
But then you found out about Eren Jager and that’s why you joined the survey corps : someone else was a titan shifter, finally, finally, there was someone like you ! And apparently he had a key that lead to his father’s basement where he hid the truth about the titans. You wanted to know the truth about your mom too ! Joining them was the only way to understand this
But you never expected to meet Levi though, the humanity’s strongest soldier. And in the worst way : you wanted to catch up Eren in a corridor to meet him but you bumped into someone who crossed your way. That someone was the heichou... And he was holding his dear cup of tea (the only damn pleasure of his damn day... ruined by you) when you bumped into him.
His precious cup of tea shaterring in the floor was the worst thing you could e v e r do to him and when you met his eyes to apologize, you got scared of his murderous look
OÏ YOU DAMN BRAT ! Where are your eyes ?! No one told you to look in front of you when you walk ? Huh ? Where do you think you were going like that ? If your eyes are that useless to you, I’ll help myself to cut them off from you, no hard feelings since you don’t fucking know how to use your damn shitty eyes in the first place ?! And what are you waiting for ?! Go clean the mess you have done cadet !
Y-Yeeeeees !!!!! H-Heichou !
Not only you definitely lost the sight of Eren but Levi had an eye on you (no pun intented with sight and eye... Ahh so many expressions in english)
Since that day, Levi ordered you to clean the refectory every night (not only you wasted his tea but your cleaning skills sucked, he had to do something with you, you couldn’t get away from this shit easily)
But Levi had actually noticed something with you, something that bothered him, and he wasn’t a man of many words but when he wanted to say something, he wouldn’t hesitate. He was honest and frank after all. So that’s what he did when he found you cleaning the tables of the refectory
His face would still show his disgust, you really sucked at cleaning, he could still see some bread crumbs on some tables... But oh well, he would just have to clean up later, gosh, no one knew how to clean in the survey corps, the headquarters were only clean thanked to him huh
You the damn shitty brat. What’s wrong with your face ? You look like a corpse. Do you want to defecate or something ?
Levi noticed the emptiness in your eyes. The same emptiness in a lot of people’s eyes in the slums. The same pain in their face. And for good reason, he had the same expression when his mother died and his entire world collapsed.
You looked like someone who was just waiting for their death and that was something he couldn’t tolerate especially when so many soldiers would have wanted to stay alive and they fought until their last breath. Levi valued life more than anyone else. Just what was wrong with you ?!
No... No Levi ! Heichou ! I’m good thanks !
Levi would frown and tch you. Your deny was the w o r s t
I happened to finish my paperwork. Stop cleaning. You are just making the tables dirtier.
Levi preparing tea and asking you to follow him in his office! He might have given the impression that he didn’t care of everything and everyone by his attitude, but it was the opposite. Erwin made him a corporal. A heichou. It was also his duty to talk to the recruits who needed help. He couldn’t stand the useless chit-chat but he was good at saying the right word.
And telling people to get their shit together. He did say that to you.
You joined the survey corps to find someone like you and the truth. You didn’t want to be alone. But you never thought that the one who would save you was Levi.
Making you tea but on the same time being scold off by Levi... He was the FIRST person to notice that deep suffering and actually care (and telling you to get your fucking shit together if you didn’t want to have your eyes ripped off by him yep yep)
Levi would actually help you (he knew the importance of being saved : Kenny, Isabel, Farlan, Erwin, even that annoying Hanji, they all helped him, now it was his turn) by asking you to clean up some stuff, making tea, sometimes putting you with a member of his squad... Giving you importance by giving you some responsabilities
And he actually succeeded. You forgot about your crime and your past. Your pain. You even found yourself talking and laughing with his bad sense of humor. He was even praising your tea and your cleaning skill few months later
He even considered you as a friend after these months, he didn’t know what whas the cause of your pain (he knew that if you wanted to open to him you would so he didn’t worry) but you could see you were more lively than when he first met you
But bonding with him woud be your mistake
 It was during a very violent expedition where even Eren in his titan form wasn’t enough, there were to many titans. And Levi was beating his ass off to kill as many titans as he could to help the SCorps to go back inside the walls. He was ready to sacrifice himself.
AND Y O U COULDN’T STAND T H A T
HE WAS YOUR SAVIOR ! HE Made you feel so ALIVE during these past months ! And you could help him, you had the powers to !
sCREW OFF YOUR SECRET AND YOUR COVER ! If you had to die, it had to be for your savior ! And that’s how you slowed down your horse, seperated yourself with the others, and went to where Levi was before transforming yourself into a titan
 Levi’s shock was real. Especially when it was a titan shifter he didn’t know. And in a few minutes you cleaned up the entire zone. And when you got out of your titan’s neck... The shock was an euphemism
The damn brat he helped... was a titan shifter.
Levi... I... I can explain everything to y -
Not now. Let’s get the fucking hell out here.
Levi was livid. He didn’t understand a shit but he trusted his guts. If you both stayed here, others titans would come. Though you never caught up the others and you finally went to a hideout of the survey corps especially made for this case of scenario
But now LEVI WANTED ANSWERS
So sadly you weren’t surprised when he took out his lames and threatened you, a lame under your chin with a cold and blank expression in his face
You have 30 seconds to explain yourself S/O. If you think you can get away, I’ll just cut off your members. Hands, legs, eyes, tongue. But who cares ? It will grow back right ?
You were disappointed but you knew it would go this way. You were a titan shifter. What did you expect ? Titan shifters didn’t have the right to live... And you wanted to burst out in tears. You told him everything. You were trapped anyways.
And you can’t remember everything ? Just like Eren. How convenient right ? What about Annie ? Where you on her fucking side all this time S/O ?! DID YOU WORK WITH HER ?!
 NO I DIDN’T ! I SWEAR ! IF YOU THINK EATING YOUR OWN PARENT IS CONVENIENT JUST KILL ME ALREADY LEVI ! DON’T YOU THINK I KNOW ? THAT I AM DISGUSTING ?! I JUST WANTED TO SAVE YOU ! ALL I HAVE EVER WANTED WAS... WAS... TO STAY WITH YOU A BIT LONGER LEVI !
You had enough of your life, the secrets, you couldn’t bear that, no more. You never talked to anyone because you were frightened. So it wasn’t surprising when you fell on the ground, crying your soul and your heart out. You were just so fed up with that broken world and that life !
My mom transformed me just to make me eat her ! I never wanted that Levi ! I swear ! I never hurt anyone else ! If you want to kill me, I won’t fight b...
Enough.
Yeah Levi grabbing you by the collar and putting you against the wall to make you standing up... To see your eyes.
Enough. I have heard it. Tch.
Heichou I...
You are not like Eren. That brat is unstoppable when he is in his titan form. He is crazier than you.
Levi had definitely calmed down. Cause Levi himself had a fright. The fright that you betrayed him, you used him, you were a spy. He had to be ready to cut out your arms and legs in the worst case scenario
But... You were you. You had the same eyes. The same pain in the eyes. Your suffering was honest. That’s why killing you wasn’t en option. And by far, the only titans shiters were CRAZY AF : Eren who could go crazy in his rage, Annie, Berthold, Reiner.
But you... He had to admit it while looking at you. He had to admit that you weren’t a titan shifter like the others.
You were the most human one.
Crying your pain, begging him to kill you... God. He couldn’t stand that and watching you sobbing and suffering. Especially when you just saved his fucking ass. You saved his damn life. Of course he was feeling a bit bitter knowing you were a titan but he couldn’t stop thinking that there was no difference. Yeah you could shift into a titan... but finally, what was the big deal ?
The world was SO FUCKED UP ALREADY, titans shifters, titans, even him wasn’t that normal
But what was making him feel sorry was the regret on your face, the regret of being you, the regret of being alive
S/O, calm down. I owe you an apologie. I don’t care if you hold a grudge against me later, that’s my job to eliminate threats. But you saved my butt back there and I thank you for that.
Now... I will be killed right...? Because I hid the truth for so long...
I don’t know. But I’m sure of what my eyes saw. You saving me and I won’t omit that to the hierarchy
But that wasn’t enough to calm you down. You were obviously crying for an entire life, like a baby, since when were you holding your feelings like that ? And because he couldn’t stand that, he finally took you in his arms
He was full aware he acted like a jerk but he had to be sure. Feeling you shaking in his arms, your tears on his warm neck, he was sure. You were so inoffensive. And even though he knew your real identity, he wanted to protect you
Because you were the personification of a collateral damage.
You didn’t ask for this, you were just a victim
The world was already wrong so he at least had to do the right thing with you in this shit.
And that’s what he fucking did : when you both went back to the walls (you shifting into a titan to kill titans behind you while Levi would guide your horse) he stood up for you in front of Erwin, Zackley and Nile. Well he had to give them that shitty excuse that as long as he could kill you, you weren’t a threat, but it was a necessary step to be officially accepted in the walls as a titan shifter
After that night, Levi and you would share a special bond : not only in the headquarters where he would often ask you in his office just to make sure you were alright and that no one would badmouth you (it would often end with him making you tea or hot chocolate while you would telling him about your day), but also oustide of the walls : he asked a special permission to team up with you
The official excuse was to keep an eye on you... But you both knew it wasn’t that. You were actually making a great team. He never suceeded to work with Eren, he was always so impulsive but it was different with you : you both trusted each other. You both would have each other’s back.
BEST TEAM EVER I’M TELLING YA
Eren making friend with you : but now you didn’t need that much to be friend with him... WHEN YOU HAD LEVI
Also Levi beating the ass of Hanji when she would harass you to make some experiments on you. You didn’t need that, you were actually controlling your titan more than Eren !
And finally the trust and that sepcial bond between you two definitely turned into the greatest love. You always thought you didn’t deserve to be loved after your crime.
But guess who told you the opposite ? Yep. Yepyepyepyepyepype Levi.
ENDING ONE :  no one thought Levi and you would date, and even Zackley and Nile got worried : what if his love blinded him ? But they had to see the evidence, you were a perfect titan shifter, not only you could control yourself, but you could transform more times in a row than Eren. Best asset ever. And oh well... If Levi trusted you, they shall do the same. He was never wrong with people
Levi would always stand up for you anyways ! If Nile or even Zackley had a problem with you, he wouldn’t mind telling them his thoughts on the matter in a snappy way
He would protect you in the Shiganshina’s battler : Sieg, Berthold, Reiner were not only interested by Eren, but also by you. He would beat every fucking damn shitty titan shifter that woud DARE TO TRY TAKING YOU
Definitely M A R R Y I N G   Y O U  after Maria’s reconquest ! You both had experienced some serious shit and you wanted to officialize your love gaaaaah ! He wanted to show to everyone he couldn’t care the less that you could transform into a titan ! And more importantly... He didn’t want you to suffer anymore !
SPOILER VERSION (FOR MANGA READERS ONLY) ( ´ ▽ ` )ノ
Ymir’s curse
Ymir’s curse
Ymir’s curse
Ymir’s curse
Y M I R ‘ S C U R S E
YMIR’S CURSE
Grisha’s diaries were clear. A titan shifter had only 13 years to live after eating the special titan
You finally found your happiness with Levi. You both were together. You even planned a life together... But the truth was...
You just had a few years to live.
You couldn’t believe your ears. You couldn’t believe that... Tragedy.
Levi too.
He finally found love. He didn’t want to lose you ! He couldn’t BARE THE THOUGHT of LOSING you ! Even worse, someone would have to eat you to not lose the titan you had!
You were both astonished and in pain to talk about it. You both needed time to that shocking and terrible news.
Of course Levi wanted to find a solution... But there was none. Lilke the others titans shifters in the past centuries, you would die, reaching your 13 years of your titan’s life
That night Levi and you had rough sex, you both wanted to express your passion, your anger, your pain, your bitter love, your need to feel each other’s skin
ENDINg 2 : after that you decided to live your life in the fullest with Levi. There was no other ways anyways. You just wanted to enjoy his love and he refused you nothing. He would do everything you wanted. And you were just grateful to have met him
Your pregnancy made you stayed in the Paradise Island in 854 while the others went to Marley to take back Eren and Sieg
And I think I will stop writing here because I will probably c r y
C’m o n ISAYAMA tell me there is a solution
They deserve happiness : Reiner, Armin, Annie, Peak, Porco.. PLEASE
even that imaginary titan shifter S/O !!! LET HER BE HAPPY WITH LEVI
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joogios · 2 months ago
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Thinking about Grisha and Zeke Jaeger and “In your basement, I grow cold” and that despite Zeke cutting Grisha off of him, Zeke still couldn’t free himself from Grisha. Zeke is the butterfly pinned to the board in the form of that photograph Grisha obsessed over and kept for years even as he celebrated his new wife and new son. Zeke in Grisha’s mind is fully stagnant at six years old. How many times did Grisha stare at the photo and desperately try to analyze his own son? How many times did he stare at it on Zeke’s birthday, how many times did he compare Zeke to Eren? Zeke had no clue Grisha was alive to do this—isn’t that, in its own way, invasive? The image of a father trying to settle down with a hidden photograph of his old, first family, without context, feels as if its Zeke who died so young instead of Zeke sending Grisha to his death.
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yodawgiherd · 6 years ago
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More than just red fabric
Rating: T Setting: current canonverse/manga chapter 118
Prompt: Could you please write Eremika to the 118th chapter. Something like the battle is already over, and Mikasa meets Eren, recovering from his wounds.
Note: Yo peeps, this is totally what's going to happen, i have through mysterious means acquired the future script of SnK, trust me. ;)
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It was over in the blink of an eye.
Marley military, arguably the mightiest in the world, quickly lost its bravado when faced with dozens of colossal titans emerging from the walls all around them. The battle, which up until now was rather one-sided, ended with a quick surrender of the invader, granting the defending forces of Paradis an unconditional victory.
But such triumph couldn’t have been achieved without sacrifices.
Zeke’s face was still etched into Eren’s memory, the relief on it quickly turning into horror as he was being picked up from the ruined body of his titan and swiftly brought to the waiting jaws. Once he ate his brother, and his royal blood coursed through Eren’s veins, the full potential of the coordinate was unlocked to him, giving him a complete control over the army in the walls. To be fair, Eren liked his brother, to a degree, but his zealous intent to end any life on the island was not a goal he could ever back. Euthanasia? Not on his watch. Eren had to play by Zeke’s rules, up until now, as he held most of the cards, but no more. Now the aces were in Eren’s hands.  
And so, the rumbling began. Not on the full-scale, just a few of the giant titan army, but it was more than enough. No one could have faced this. With all their titans out of commission and the airships shot down, Marleyans had nothing to hit back with. Some pockets of resistance tried to keep their fighting spirits up, but from his vantage point high on the wall, where Eren climbed for a better view, he could easily direct the attention of his awoken colossal soldiers to quench any danger to his comrades. Now with the fighting done the unsung savior of Eldians sat down for a moment, to catch his breath and organize his thoughts. Because while today was won, the long-term effect was still fickle, and debatable, and he had to make sure that….
“Eren?”
A voice he knew, more intimately than his own, voice of a person he both longed for and dreaded to meet. Steeling himself and turning his head slightly, he decided to face the inevitable, which was coming to him in long strides.
Mikasa looked battle-worn, her uniform burned and cut, multiple new scratches and bruises on her skin, but didn’t appear to be seriously harmed. There was something about her, something Eren couldn’t quite place, that just didn’t sit right, not until she came to stand next to him and he finally managed to connect the dots together. Her scarf was gone. The usual redness underneath her chin being replaced with the pale glow of her skin, and a pink scratch on the left side, most likely from a bullet. The realization made Eren gasp. Not the fact that her scarf was missing, but that she was this close to dying, being shot down by a random soldier who’d never know that he killed the most impressive woman who ever lived.
“I left it behind.”, she said, seeing the stare at her bare throat, misinterpreting it. Defiant, she held her chin up, challenging his look with her own, unflinching. Apparently she was ready for him to be disappointed or something, even after everything he’s done to her. This girl was really one in a million.
“I’m glad.”, looking away, back at the city, Eren caught the change in her expression only at the edge of his vision, the simple words taking her aback.
“You’re…glad?”
“Of course. It’s good to see that you won’t let anyone insult you, not even me. Good to see that you’re finally free.”
Bark of laughter was the last thing he expected, but there it was, making him look back at her with a raised eyebrow.
“Something funny?”
“Are you really that dense?”, she asked, shaking her head with a bitter smile.
Unsure of what she meant, Eren waited for her to go on. Not like he had anything better to do right now anyway and having a moment alone with Mikasa was precious to him, especially now when everything else went to shit.
“That scarf, what do you think it meant for me? A bond? A chain binding me to you?”
Shrugging, he remained silent, because while he would most likely choose different words, the meaning was basically the same. The scarf was nothing but a collar to a leash that was firmly attached to him, not by anyone’s choice, but by her birth, and the tragedy that occurred. Mikasa was not to blame for it, no one but whoever forged that genetic chain was, and those people were long dead.
“You’re wrong.”, she cut into his thoughts, voice clear of any doubt in her heart, “It wasn’t you, the reason why I wore it, it was so much more.”
“What do you mean?”
“Look at it from my perspective. I was nine years old and my parents were just brutally murdered in front of me. I was cold, hurting, alone, about to be sold off as cattle and then you came in. Saved me, wrapped that scarf around me…” Mikasa half raised her hand towards her neck before she remembered that it was bare, letting it fall back to her side, “It was warm, and safe, and showed me that there’s not only blood and violence in this world, but beautiful things too. That’s why I clung to it so much.”, she shook her head, sadness seeping into her words, “I would have given it up, if I had other reminders, but what was our life Eren? Was it nice? Safe? Warm? No. Your father disappeared, your mother died, our home was destroyed, and we spent every waking hour training and fighting to kill giant man-eating monsters. That’s hardly the life a young girl wishes for herself.”
“You didn’t have to join the military with me.”, Eren pointed out, “You decided to do that yourself.”
“And what was I supposed to do?”, she countered, “Let you die alone? You were my last link to the safety and warmth, you and the scarf, and with how you treated me when we were trainees…”
Eren could feel his ears warming up slightly when Mikasa reminded him of that time. She was right, he was nothing but an asshole towards her, jealous of her strength, hating how overprotective she was. It took him a long time before he realized it, and he regretted it ever since. And Mikasa was still far from done.
“We had to almost die together before our relationship improved, and once we reached the ocean I thought that maybe we could finally be done with this fighting, finally have a home to return to, not an endless line of camps.”, she sighed, “But I was naïve, wasn’t I. In the basement, we found out that titans were never the true enemy, that there are people, humans like us beyond the ocean, wanting nothing more than to exterminate us all. Another war to fight, perhaps even more brutal and savage than the one we just won. More restless nights. More training. More blood and violence.”, her voice turned bitter,” You disappeared, leaving me with nothing but memories and the stupid scarf to remember the warmth by. And when you returned, did you bring back the safety I craved? No. More war, insults, and hate I did not deserve in the slightest, both for me and Armin.”
“Mikasa I… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean…”
She didn’t let him finish.
“Yes, you did. Maybe not word-by-word, but overall you meant those words you said to me, don’t deny it.”, she pointed towards the city, “The battle is over, so I was wondering, would you perhaps tell me why? What did I do to make you hate me?”
A fair question, one that deserved a well-thought out answer from him, in the least. He had to make her see, understand, because their time was already growing short, and Eren had no idea what will happen once they are discovered.
“It’s… not that I hate you, I said that wrong and I apologize. I was angry at that time. Disappointed.”
“Disappointed?”, she tilted her head to the side, a gesture Eren found downright adorable and had to bite his tongue not to say it out loud, “Why?”
“You asked me to see from your perspective, so now please, do the same for me.”, he took a deep breath, doing his best to organize the words, but he was no poet. There was no way around this, and Mikasa deserved the truth.
“After we reached the ocean,”, he began, “I came to realize many things. My life is going to be short; I don’t have much time left. We, as a nation, are doomed, unless we do something. And, perhaps most importantly,”, this was hard to say without blushing, “the attention of the girl who used to annoy me to no end was actually rather pleasing after all.”
Mikasa blinked in surprise, her mouth dropping to a small “o”, but Eren pressed on, determined to get it off his chest.
“I don’t know what it was, the fondness I had for you, I think I had it in me for a long time, never realizing it. But here we were, maturing, both in body and in mind, and day after day I looked at you and wondered how I could ever take you for granted. The way you acted towards me, so attentive, and supportive, gentle, it was all I needed. When I was younger, it was just titans this, and titans that, experiments, shifting, but now I found myself wondering if you smile was always so radiant. If the way you tuck the strand of hair behind your ear was always so adorable, and if you were always so a-…uhm… attractive.”, unable to continue, fumbling on words, he  looked away, “This is so embarrassing to say.”
“I was not the only one who changed, your body matured a lot too. A few years back we were the same height, and now I have to look up to see eye-to-eye.”, Mikasa offered, hoping to ease him out of his sudden muteness.
It took him a few seconds to realize what she was saying, but then it hit him. Did Mikasa just compliment how he looked?
“You still haven’t told me the whole story.”, she pointed out, before he could really start mulling over it.
“Right.”, he agreed, “So here I was, thinking about all these things I never cared for before, mostly regarding you, and I came to a conclusion. No matter how I felt, the lives of our nation come first. I left, as you said, crossed the ocean, met my brother, and we talked. He told me a lot, about the titans, the world, and also about you, the Ackerman clan. The bond you create, the unnatural strength, the way your bodies are genetically enhanced to serve as elite bodyguards. And it got me thinking. What if all this fondness you have for me, what if its not from you, but from the bond instead? What If you don’t like me because of your free will, but because you have to?”, Eren looked back at her, “What if all those feelings I realized I had for you, what if they were all a lie?”
Eyes swinging back to the city, Eren went on.
“Then I saw you, back at Marley, saving my ass again, and realized that I can’t control it. Even with all this knowledge about the bond, I still loved you. I hated myself, I hated you, I hated the stupid bond and whoever created it. And I said all those words, later, and you’re right that I meant them, to a degree. It was wrong to say them, but my feelings were still hurt, and Yelena was breathing down my neck, and it all came out much harsher than I ever wanted to. I don’t hate you, as a person, because you’re wonderful, but I hate the possibility that I forced you to love me, that I bound you to myself with that scarf, made you nothing more but a servant when you have the capability to be so much more.”
Silence fell after his words, because he said everything that he wanted to say, and now it was up to Mikasa to digest those words.  And she did so with a laugh.
“Dummy.”
Eren looked up, unsure of what she meant, to see her staring down at him, face unreadable.
“Stand up.”, she ordered him, tone leaving no place for discussion.
Scrambling to his feet, Eren watched her unmoving expression, wondering if she wanted to punch him in the face or something, motion that was completely justified in his eyes and he would do nothing to stop it. There it was, Mikasa took a deep breath, and soon would pull her arm back to…
“Kiss me.”
“W-What?”
“You heard me.”, tone still completely militaristic, as if she was directing recruits on the field, her eyes holding steel in them, Mikasa’s lips didn’t do as much as twitch.
“I said kiss me.”, she repeated.
Slowly, sure that this is some kind of joke, or a revenge, Eren leaned closer, a bit scared of what would follow, and closer still, until he could gently and carefully press his lips against her forehead. Still, she didn’t hit him for some reason.
“Eren…”, she whispered instead, “You’re so incredibly dense sometimes.”
What? Did she want him to kiss her on the cheek or something? Surely not, he did not deserve such familiarity, not matter how much he craved to….
Her hands, appearing out of nowhere, took his face into a strong grip, and before he realized what was happening he was being pulled down, with a strength he could not deny, until his lips met hers, and they were actually kissing. The feeling made him freeze completely, because it felt much better than he ever even dared to hope, soft and warm, and while Eren couldn’t do much but stare Mikasa was way bolder, swiping her tongue alongside the seam of his mouth before pulling back, a wicked smile on her face.
“Dummy.”, she repeated, “I don’t have a single doubt about what I feel for you, not anymore. After you told me all those things, I was hurt, but in the end and after a lot of thinking I realized that you were right in a certain way. You made me look beyond the horizons I made for myself and see the bigger picture. I realized something. I don’t need the scarf. I don’t need you.”, she leaned closer, “But I want you, and there’s nothing unnatural about that.”
There was a lot of things he could say to that. But all of them felt unnecessary, as right now, there was a burning need inside him, one that he hasn’t felt in his life before. Wrapping his hands around her waist, he kissed her again, high on the wall, above the city that was still waking up from the aftermath of that terrible battle, the city that had many reasons to hate him, but with Mikasa in his hands and her lips moving alongside his own, he couldn’t bring himself to care. That was until she pulled back, making him growl, already missing the connection.
“You gotta apologize to Armin.”, she breathed out, “And Jean. They both trusted you.”
“They did?”
“Mhmm.”
“All right.”
But when he tried kissing her again, she pulled back out of his reach, giggling.
“Promise me.”
“Fine! I swear I’ll apologize to Armin.”
“And Jean.”, she added.
“And Jean.”, Eren agreed, already dreading the moment.
“And Connie.”, she went on, just about exceeding the limits of his patience.
“I’ll apologize to everyone, hundred times over. That enough?”
She nodded.
Whatever humiliation laid in his future was however completely worth it, as she allowed their mouth to combine again, each kiss feeling better than the last one. It didn’t matter that there was still the shortened lifespan of his to take into consideration. That while they repelled Marley for now, the danger persisted. That Yelena was still at large, somewhere below, most likely plotting her revenge already. That the world was still out to get them, even with their newest colossal guardians standing at attention. But Eren didn’t think about any of this, as for the moment he allowed himself to be selfish and focus solely on the woman he held.
Because any city can be rebuilt, but most importantly, maybe their relationship, which he thought dead and killed by his own hand, could be rebuilt too.
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dammitadolfnomorecake · 6 years ago
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SCSI (shifty eyes and whispers... don't blame me)
The mood throughout the camp was somber. Their numbers only a fraction of what they'd when they rode out from Trost. Everyone had lost someone on, and Eren didn't know what to say or do to help. Especially after being singled out and yelled at by a soldier he didn't even know. It was shit. He knew they had a right to be angry, but he was hurting too. Levi hadn't even spoken since he'd returned from helping kill the remaining wolves. The fact they were even now able to make camp within the walls of Shinganshima was all thanks to the soldiers they'd lost. Hanji and Armin had gone ahead with collapsing part of the wall, the entrance not completely blocked, instead it bottlenecked, only serving to slow the werewolves down. Curled up in front of the fire, Eren kept his face against his knees, trying to drown out the dribbles of conversation around him. He'd failed. He'd failed so fucking hard that more people had died. When the fire started to die, Levi turned in for the night. His boyfriend casting an aura of wanting to be alone, so Eren left him to it. They both could probably do with some space. Gradually, he grew restless from anger, rising to his feet and drawing the attention of Moblit. The only one who actually seemed to be awake "Eren?" "I just need to clear my head. I won't go far" Moblit nodded, the man returning to staring down at the blackening embers. Waiting until he was away from the camp, he shifted. Closing his eyes as his claws dug into the sand over the cobblestone road. No matter how much he'd loved and longed for Shinganshima, it was always going to be a giant graveyard. Some day people would rebuild, but things would never be the same. Opening is eyes, he turned, initially ambling down the street, before working his way into running. Even if he couldn't remember, his feet still knew the way home, his paws thumping against the stone as he raced towards it, like he'd done when was he a human kid. Finding his house just as flattened as he remembered it, he wanted to throw his head back and howl. The only thing stopping him was the possibility of drawing more wolves. Forcing himself to face the reality in front of his eyes, he padded over to the destroyed building, before shifting back and taking a piece of roof tile into his hand. This wasn't fair. He'd come home. He'd come home and there was nothing. No ghosts. It might have been a selfish wish to see his mother again. Or even his father. But for a place dripping with death, there wasn't even a ghost around to tell the story. Instead, the night had become eerily silent. The stars mocking them with twinkle. He was once again trapped in a cage, and couldn't even see a way out of it anymore. This was the life he'd thought he'd wanted, or, at least in part it was. He'd thought he'd always be a normal human, with a pathetic crush on his hero. Now he was the most hated person in the world, pregnant to what would be the second most hated person in the world. It wasn't fair. If there were people in this world that could carve out some small piece of happiness, why wasn't he allowed? He didn't ask to be different. He didn't ask for the ability to shift or for the ability to fall pregnant. All he'd wanted was for break down the walls and find a way to liberate humanity from their role as fodder. Hanging his head, tears streamed down his face. Tomorrow they'd ask him to shift to clear the rubble... tomorrow he could lose his baby... another senseless death. * Unable to sleep, Levi wasn't surprised when Eren left. He also wasn't surprised when his boyfriend returned in tears. Sliding up behind him, Eren cold hand grabbed his as he shook "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry" "No... you're not to blame" "I went home... I'm going to have shift tomorrow" Rolling over, Levi shook his head. He didn't care if there wasn't another way. They'd made one. He'd lost his team to this shitty hellhole. He couldn't lose his family.... "You can't. You were in so much pain earlier" "There's no other way..." Eren's voice broke, pulling his hand over to rest on his stomach "I don't know how to protect it... I don't want to lose it, but... there's no other way" "There's always another way. We'll make another way. I can't... Eren, I can't lose you or the baby. And not here" "There's no other way. The house, its gone. The roof's over the rubble... even if we wanted to find out more about my family, we need to clear it to get in" "Then we'll use the horses" "Levi, there's no space. I don't know what to do" "Take me there?" "To my home?" "Now. While everyone is sleeping.... I want to see it. I want to see where you came from. I want to see if we can find another way" "It's cold. You'll need your cloak" "You won't keep me warm?" Eren sighed, his boyfriend sitting up, taking his hand off his belly and looking him in the eye "You're acting strange" He probably was. But this was Eren's fault. He'd changed him. The brat has wormed his way into his mind, twisting through his walls and cocooning around his warped emotions "I don't want to lose you, or our baby" "I know that. But we're still expected to do our jobs. Erwin isn't going to try and find another way, not when he has a convenient tool like me" "You're not a tool. With your strength and mine, we'll find another way" "Ok..." Eren kept a tight hold on his hand and they stared down at the remains of his childhood home "That's it?" "Yeah. It's... bad, isn't it?" "It's not great" "I don't think we can do this without me shifting" "Just let me take a look. What did Erwin even want from in here?" "My dad's notes... did you know they looked into my family? They couldn't even find anything on him... it was like... like he just showed up one day..." "You didn't know your grandparents?" "Mum's parents died when I was super young... dad never talked about his..." Somewhere in the back of his mind, Levi had held this mental image of Eren growing up, being spoilt rotten by them. The kid loved his family... so he just kind of figured that they'd all be a tight unit. Everybody in everybody else's business... "Where were your dad's notes?" "He kept an office in the basement. We weren't allowed down there. Erwin's got it in his head there's something down there, but now we know the gate was blown up intentionally... maybe there is something down there" His omega sniffled, trying to pull his hand from his. Tugging Eren into a hug, Levi rubbed his boyfriends back with his free hand "Eren. You're not your father. Whatever he did, it has nothing to do with you. Ok. No matter what we find, I'll stand by you" "But all this could be our fault... if dad... if dad was treating supernaturals or maybe even one... it could be why the Government blew up the gate" "In that case, don't you think your dad was doing the right thing? And that those pieces of shit that decided to elect themselves to Government, are the ones in the wrong?" "But if dad did something wrong..." "Eren, don't go there. Just focus on you and the baby for now. Ok?" "I'll try... I can still shift to a wolf... maybe we can dig our way in?" "After today, I think you need to give shifting a rest. Let me take a look at this pile... at the house" "Smooth save" "I thought so. Why don't you sit down?" "Because I don't want to" "Brat, go talk to the baby, or something. I need to think" "Are you saying I'm distracting?" "I'm saying you're very distracting. Right now, I want to feed and I want to fuck you" Eren laughed, his cold nose pressing into Levi's neck "If you find a way in, I'll let you do anything you want to me" "Go. Sit. Right now" "Yes,sir" Purring the words, Eren let go. Jogging over to to ruins of the house across the road, his omega settled himself on the edge of the ledge. The cheeky shit throwing him a thumbs up. After his day, the last thing he wanted to do was go shuffling through a pile of refuse... even if it was Eren's house. This was for their baby. It was so Eren's child... Not even born and causing trouble. After an hour or so of moving debris, Levi couldn't go any future. Even if Eren was to help, the roof beams were too heavy for the pair of them. Annoyed and covered in dust, he hated giving up. Giving up meant Eren would have to shift. There wasn't even a way to tunnel into the basement, the foundations seemed to be made of solid stone, so solid that he had no idea how the man had even created a basement in the first place. Feeling like he'd failed again, he brushed himself off as he walked to Eren, his footsteps heavy, as if his boots were filled with led. Sliding off the wall, Eren came to him, meeting him halfway with a small yawn "I can tell by the look" "I'm sorry" "No... you tried. And you cleared a lot... so maybe... maybe things will look better in the morning?" "Shitty brat. You don't need to try and make me feel better" "Today's just been... today's been a rough day" "It's been completely shit" "Yeah. What do you say I show you where the well is?" "That might just be the best idea you've had all day" "Really? Because I think you need to feed" "That was my idea" "Mine now" Why was he in love with this cheeky little shit?! * "Eren! Wake up!" After cleaning off at the well, Eren had led him up to his favourite spot, near the tree he used to nap by. Laying in each other's arms, the sex had been soft and sweet, Levi eventually falling asleep with his head against Eren's stomach. He really was hopelessly in love with the small swell, and it truly felt like the one thing going right for the pair of them. Unlike the fact they'd overslept "Eren, come on..." "Fuck off, I'm sleepy" "Eren, the suns up. We're late" "If we're already late, what does is matter if we just fall back to sleep" His boyfriends sleepy mumble was completely precious, and if he could, he'd let Eren spend the whole day napping in the sun "I love you, you little shit. But we're late and Erwin's not going to be happy" "Ah fuck... I forgot about Sir Fluffybrows" "Fluffybrows?" "You call him "Shitty Eyebrows"... Blonde Arsehole with Ridiculous Eyebrows is just too long" "You could shorten it to BARE" "I don't want to think of Erwin being bare... in any way, shape, or form. Ew... why would you do that to me? I'm awake now, you jerk" Stealing a kiss from Eren's pouty lips, he then kissed his way down to Eren's stomach, mouthing at the swell "Levi... don't start something we can't finish" "I just wanted to say hello to our baby" "Then save your kisses for me. I don't want to be jealous" "You have nothing to be jealous about, but just let me give you something so you don't forget you're mine" Moving across to Eren's exposed hip, Levi licked the taunt skin, cleaning the spot before sucking a dark and possessive hickey on the soft caramel skin "Levi!" "Come on, you shit" "Kiss me again?" "Will you get up?" "Parts of me already have" Punching Eren in the arm, his boyfriend finally started moving, trying to scowl at him while smiling with his eyes. With Eren's guidance, they made it back to the house in a manner of minutes. Hanji howling with laughter as they both arrived "Gentlemen. How nice of you to join us" "We were up late cleaning up the rubble" "So that's what they call it now" Poking her tongue out, Hanji dodged the elbow Eren threw her way "Oh, relax. You're not even that late" Erwin cleared his throat, shooting Hanji a disapproving voice "As I was saying, we need to figure out how to proceed. Mikasa has already pointed out where the basement entrance is in" Hanji did a little dance?, or maybe she was having a fit?, before pointing down at the roof remnants "Yep! It's right there, under those massive beams..." "Eren's not shifting. Find another way" "It's the easiest way" "And what if we're attacked while moving the rubble" "That's why we have people waiting at both gates. Seriously. We can't get a horse down here, let alone two or three. All he needs to do is shift" "He's not shifting!" Looking to Eren, Erwin frowned "Is there some reason why Eren shouldn't shift?" "Because he should have a choice in what he does! It's his fucking body" "That's funny. It's thanks to us that he's not dead as it is. Eren, is there any reason why you shouldn't shift?" Eren opened and closed his mouth, before looking to his feet "No? Good. You will shift and you will move this roof" "He's not fucking shifting! Hanji, find another fucking way!" "Erwin... maybe, maybe we should..." "If they'd managed to keep it in their pants for longer than 5 seconds, and actually been here when they were supposed to, they might have had a say in it. Instead, it's already halfway through the morning, and now Eren won't shift, because he refused to listen to his superior officers. Eren. Let me make this simple. Either you shift and move those beams, or, I take you into custody and I turn you over to the Military Police on a charge of treason" "You can't do that!" "Watch me" Levi stepped forward, but Eren darted in front of him. His boyfriend looked miserable, as if the worst had already happened. Leaving in, Eren kissed just in front of his ear "I'm so sorry" "Eren..." "I... I really wanted to have this baby with you" "We can try something else" "They'll send me away. I don't want to be sent away... they'll torture me. They'll take the baby" "Eren, don't do this" "Levi, get away from him right now" "He's not fucking shifting!" "You're going to be selfish enough to sentence him to death?! I never thought you'd be this stupid" "Please Levi... maybe...." "Don't say it'll be alright. You were in so much pain yesterday" "If I get it done quick..." "Eren, you have until the count of 5. 1... 2..." Shoving him back as hard as he could, Eren turned, shifting with the most heartbreaking howl he'd ever heard from the boy. Lashing out, the beams cracked as they shifted slightly, roofing falling off the side of the block. Howling, Eren was about to strike them again, when his body shifted back. The teen screaming as he fell to the ground, his arms around his stomach as he screamed again "Eren!" Jumping up, Levi rushed to his brat, lifting him into his arms, growling as Hanji tried to approach "Eren... please" "Levi, what's going on?" "He needs help!" Using his knee to balance Eren as he tried to find a hold that didn't hurt him omega, he let out a choke half sob as the knee of his pants grew wet "Levi..." "Come on, brat... come on..." "Levi, I need to examine him" "Haven't you all done enough! You forced him into this!" Whimpering, Eren's lips moved, voicing a silent apology that was meant for no one other than their baby "I've got you. I'm taking you back to our tent. You're going to be ok" Laying Eren down, his omega his sleeve, sobbing as he tried to bury his face against Levi's chest "Shhh... shhh... you've got to calm down for me. Ok. You're putting more stress on the baby..." "Alpha... it hurts" "I know. I know it does" The tent flap rustled as Hanji climbed in, Levi pulling Eren tighter again him as he bared his teeth "Get out!" "Levi, Eren needs medical help. He's bleeding" "Get out and leave us alone!" Whimpering at his cold tone, Levi rocked Eren, stroking his hair as he hushed him again "Eren, it's Hanji. I need to examine you, ok?" Whimpering again, his brat nodded slightly "Ok. I'm going to work at getting your boots and pants off. You don't have to look. Levi, keep trying to calm him down" If Eren hadn't consented, Levi would have broken Hanji's fingers for touching his hurting boyfriend. Laying on his side, Eren still had his face hidden against Levi, while the smell of his brat's blood had his stomach rolling. He'd never forgive Erwin for this. The man should have known Eren was pained from shifting. He'd fucking seen it the day before. But no. All he cared about was getting into the fucking basement. He hoped whatever down there was gone. He hoped the man's efforts resulted in nothing. Just so he could feel some measure of pain, like the pain both he and Eren were going through. Gasping as Hanji probed, Levi growled "Is he... is he what I think he is?" "If you think he's fucking pregnant, then you're fucking right" "Ok... Eren, I know it hurts, but I can't tell if you're losing it or not. For now, I want you to lay on your back and stay very still. All we can do is wait for now" "Are you fucking serious?!" "If I'd known he was pregnant, maybe I could have fucking stopped this. Instead, you both kept it to yourselves" "Of course we did! Erwin is looking for anything, anything at all that he can use to kick Eren out the Survey Corps and to seperate us!" "Levi" "Don't Levi me. He's my fucking world Hanji. And he was so fucking scared over being pregnant, but he's even more scared of being taken and cut to pieces. Of having our baby cut to pieces" "Look. If Erwin asks..." "You say nothing. He probably doesn't even care. He didn't bother coming to check. No. All he cares about is what he might find in that basement" "I don't care. I'm done with both of you right now. Eren needs to rest and stay still. Anything he needs, you do it for him. If the bleeding increases, let me know. I'm sick of being stuck in the middle of this! You two used to be fucking friends, now you're acting like little kids. Get your act together" Hanji stormed from the tent, while Levi rolled Eren onto his back. His boyfriend didn't want to let him go. Reaching behind, he pulled his blankets over, using them to give Eren some privacy, before settling to sit beside him, stroking Eren's hair again "You're ok... you're ok, I'm here" "I'm sorry" "No... shhh, it's not your fault" "The baby..." "Shhh. Hey, if it's anything like you, it's stubborn and it's a fighter. Don't give up on it brat" "Can you lay down with me? I'm cold" "Sure. I'm not going anywhere" "I'm sorry" "Don't make me repeat myself" Eren gave him a smile that also may have been a grimace, but he chose to take it as a smile. His brat was strong... and hopefully their baby would be too.
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lichamonae · 8 years ago
Text
The most beautiful smile
Ok guys, this is it, the eremika fanfic, hope you like it.
This is 4 years after reaching the ocean.
Pairing:  Eremika
Words:  4,000 ~
Rating: Very innocent <3
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Wow, I´m tired – She smiles at the reconstructed house, while takes her sweat off her forehead. She is not a smiley person, like, at all; but when she smiles it is very special for her, it´s another level experience in her life.
She ducks to grab her garden tools left in the floor and watches her beautiful white dress *great* – It´s all dirty and wet, I need to take care of my formal clothes, I´m still not get used to be so dressed up. - She shakes off the dirt and enters to the pretty little house.
It looks very different of what it was, but she could not remember all the details. She´s very sure the kitchen counter was in the right side of the house, and the living room wasn’t that big. The walls are a little bit lighter, and the modern fashion took over in some furniture. She just couldn´t find anywhere the same jar she used to put flowers in for Mrs. Jaegar 10 years ago.
Ten years ago…
What kind of person lives everything she lived this past 10 years and still stays alive?, Nobody cares, she thought.
In her room there is a bit amount of her stuff (well, she doesn´t have much), but almost all stayed in the recluts house, even the scarf. She changes and takes off her pony tail. She looks at the mirror – I´m so different. - She can tell is not a girl anymore, like she always have been very tall and strong, always looking bigger than she was, but this was different.
Her face´s shape was more defined, her hair has been growing and growing this past years. She really didn´t care about cutting it anymore, and it was almost getting to the waist – I need to cut it now - But she really liked how it looks on her. Her figure was more delicated than before; she used to do exercises once in a while now so her muscles where less marked. She was relieved about that for some reason.
She looked just like a normal girl, but she wasn´t a normal girl.
*knock knock*
She heard the sound of the door, she wasn´t expecting anybody, but maybe is him – No, is not; maybe they sent Armin again.
-Mikasa! I know you are here, open the door. – She heard Armin's voice *exhales*
Is not that she doesn´t want to see him, she loves Armin with all her heart. But since everything was revealed, she just could not bear watching her best friends die.  And that big fight Eren and she had was too much for her to support; what she was thinking anyways? Who was her to make him change his mind?
-Hi! – She hugged him really tight that he couldn't breathe.
-Oh, *coughs* wow, hi! Stop showing off Mikasa.
-Welcome home, Armin.
She makes the dinner for him and gives him a tea while the meal is ready. Her skills in the kitchen always have been good, but she has been improving. Armin asks himself is there is something that she just couldn´t do.
-Mikasa, wow. Something like this I can't eat it where do I live, you know.
She sits down and stares at him, almost with threatening eyes – So who send you this time?, Levi? Hanji? Sasha???.
-You know Sasha cries all over the place when she misses you… this tea is so great, did Levi teaches you? – He sips his tea without looking Mikasa in the eyes.
-E… eren? It was Eren?
Armin, suddenly looks down, then looks at the ceiling and finally all the house. - You made an amazing job in here, the last time I came there was only one room and the basement; But now, it's like you've recreated the whole house ... Even built just two rooms.
Silence. Armin always was like this, he always perceives others feelings and movements and uses it against them. And he was very persuasive, this kid is dangerous.
-I think you wanna leave in the morning, so if you have something to say, say it now. – Mikasa breaks the silence; she knows what all this is about. They want her, her strength, her skills, and her will to protect Eren no matter what. But she can´t protect him anymore, she can´t protect something that is doomed. Is like they were already dead, she has already lost everything.
-Mikasa, two years ago, he didn't mean all the things he said. He didn’t mean to figth with you like he did. Of all the people around you, Eren is the one who cares the most about you. Even Jean felt sorry for him... well after he almost kills him for talking to you like that.
-“I will wrap it as many times as I need to” – Mikasa says looking in the distance, very nostalgic. Her heart starts to feel this whole again.
-That´s what he said to you right? I mean, that’s what he told me that happened that day.
Mikasa looks at Armin with surprised. Why in the world Eren would talk about that? that was very personal. They were going to die and she tried to ki…
-He told me that maybe, just maybe you tried to kiss him – Armin looked at her with embarrassment while saying those words, he was waiting to Mikasa break the table and kicking him out of the house.
Mikasa relaxed, and breathed very very deeply. *just breathe* *just pretend he didn´t said that*
- Eren and me are very important to you Mikasa, I know Sasha is very important too. If you want us to go and fight without you, I´ll understand, but I know that you won´t never do that. I told you the last time that it was probably that this war was far away, but some soldiers were informed that they are now coming here and they want us dead. They need my titan, Annie and Eren´s to win this. But if we don´t have you, if you don´t protect him, we are screwed.
-Don´t you have Levi? he is enough for all of you, he will protect him.
-Mikasa, I… told him that I will not tell you but, you deserve to know it.
Mikasa felt her cold sweat in her head and arms. She was reckless of leaving Eren on his own this past two years. He needs her, Armin needs her. The only thing Mrs. Jeager told her to do was protect Eren, and she just leave him.
-Eren is coming here, I know this is the selfishest thing in the world, but we need to recover our pride, we deserve to be free. We deserve to live in this world the years that we have left. –Armin stands up and with determination says this words to Mikasa.
She felt how Armin was so brave to say those words to her. Even two years ago, Armin could not stop her.
What happened two years ago was something she didn´t want to think about...
She had been through all stages of lost: Shock, denial, anger, despair, acceptance. This happened, one, two times now? Three, but this time she could not accept it, she couldn´t be angry, she just have to watch the only two humans she cared about just die, the only two persons who live deep in her heart.
They were preparing and developing strategies to contra attack the race who wants them dead. They even were strong enough to fight back those big metal monsters. The titans by their side were very strong, Eren and Armin were very strong. Levi and Mikasa were doing their thing too by taking over the machines and capturing people to gain information. They were two very busy years, and the odds were in their favor. The people inside the walls, the Erdians have a chance to win, to live. But Mikasa just was feeling worst and worst every passing day.
She never looked at the calendar, she stopped every person to celebrated birthdays. She just looked how Eren and Armin´s life were fading, little by little. And they were so, happy? Like if they weren´t weapons, if they weren´t used by the whole humanity inside the walls. Then she started to feel used as well.
-What are you saying, are you out of your mind? – Eren said very angry at her while Mikasa was grabbing him by his arm. This was the second time they were fighting this week, Mikasa wanted to stop him to leave to another misson.
-All that I want is to you to live, maybe you will just die sooner, sooner than your miserable life span – Mikasa was already crying quietly, but her words were very solid and demanding.
- If you don´t want to come, don´t do it, if you want to all humanity die, just wish for it. Until we don't murder them, we are not free, we are not even alive.
Eren screams were very audible tho. Jean, Sasha, Connie and other recluts were listening everything from Eren´s room while they were preparing for leaving.
-They have been fighting like 2 hours now, and Eren is just saying the same bullshit, I´m gonna end this now – Jean was going to Eren´s room but Connie stopped him.
-Don´t be ridiculous. Mikasa would murder you if you stand there, let them have this marriage moment.
-They are not marriage, you asshole, he is just a dick to her all the fucking time and he doens´t even care about her. – Jean said with venom in his mouth, he was just tired of watching her been depressed.
Eren came out of the room yelling at Mikasa and putting his uniform, while Mikasa was behind him. She tried to help him putting on his equipment, but Eren take her off.
-You are not coming – Said Eren with a salty voice
-The you are just gonna die there
-Then I will fucking die, I don´t want your protection anymore. I want to this protecting bullshit stops now.
Mikasa was still putting her scarf, like she was not listening to him, and the others in the living room look other ways, the place was very tense. Eren´s words are always very harsh, but right now he was really pissed off.
They all started to leave the house, but Eren stopped Mikasa.
-I said, you are not going.
Mikasa looked deadly at Eren´s eyes – I´m coming.
-I´m not saying not you to fight, I´m saying you are not coming because of me anymore. If I´m going to die soon I´m going to give everything for our freedom, and you are selfish enough to want me to stop; so that´s the deal.
-I´m going to take you home, where you can live your last years in peace away of all this bullshit
-What fucking house Mikasa? That house is ruinned, that life is ruined. You can´t just pretend this not existed and build a happy family.
In that moment, was the first time in all her life that she really hate him.
”I will wrap it as many times as I need to”
What a liar
-Then I will build a fucking house! –she yelled at him
All of the soldiers turned back to Eren and Mikasa. They could not tell what they just heard. That was Mikasa yelling at Eren. She yelled at him!.
Armin just could not believe. She punched him many times back then, but because he was reckless boy, but this was different.
She was very different, this was not Mikasa. She was thinking now for her, and not just for Eren.
Armin tried to stop her, but she just got in her horse and went as fast as she could. She did it so fast than her scarf fell on the floor, she didn’t even care.
----------
 -I´m a selfish person now Armin, I´m selfish too. I was expecting to Eren just come here, build the house again and try to live like normal people, but we are not normal, I´m not a normal girl.
-Mikasa, I don´t know why the three of us meet, why suddenly we ended up trying to save humanity, but it feels like we all three were destiny to be together, to save this stupid cause. We are not meant to be happy, you know? but I think that if we are together again, we are going to be happy. With the years I have left, the only think that will make me happy is being with you and Eren.
She wanted to hold her tears, be strong but she was afraid to see him again, and then she realized.
-Wait Armin, is he coming here? When is he…
Too late
The door was open, his figure was there. Shit
When she saw Armin a year ago she was shocked. He looked more mature, his factions were more rough and manly. He was so sweet looking, and thanks to that people always look down of him, for his weakness. But now, she was sure that´s not the case anymore. She even though he was a very handsome man, even with more presence than Capitan Erwin back then.
But this was different, because Eren´s eyes were the only thing she could see. His eyes were very big and green, there was a bright light on them, even if his life was fading. Those eyes were looking the whole place. The kitchen, then Mikasa, the table, Mikasa, the rooms, Mikasa. She could not look away of those eyes.
Silence again. What an awkward day.
-Mi..
-Er..
Armin watched the two jerks saying nothing. Looking at each other, mumbling their names, he wanted to laugh, but clearly was not the moment.
Armin took his tea and yawns like he was very tired. – Well, I´m going to rest in one of the rooms Mikasa, so good night both of you.
He left them alone.
Eren was still in the entrance of the house, and Mikasa was still looking at his eyes. He closed the door behind him and took a sit, Mikasa went to the kitchen.
She offered him tea and sat down again in the chair in front of him. She now was looking at some fabric in Eren´s neck. Oh
-Ah… I forgot I have it, take it. – Eren could tell that Mikasa was looking the scarf and took it off. He offered to Mikasa, but she didn´t take it so Eren left it above table
-I´m…
Eren wanted to say something, but he couldn´t. She was, so…mature now. Her hair was so long, shinny. He now understood why Jean was so impressed about Mikasa the first time he saw her.
*Is this how Jean felt the first time he saw Mikasa?* because he was maybe feeling the same, how… how beautiful” He left himself thinking that.
-I´m sorry – finally said Eren.
-I´m sorry too
- I told Armin to leave you alone, I don´t want you to come, but this all shit is going to start again, and I can´t go without talking to you.
-You, don´t want me to come? – Said Mikasa while looking down, he´s saying the same cruel things like back then.
Eren didn´t understand what she was looking so sad, and then he saw Armin in the edge of one of the room´s door doing signs to him. *abort?, what do you mean by… oh fuck*
-No, no, no, that´s not what I meant... Look at this place, you recreated this with all your effort. It is hard for me been here, in our house were everything started, where everything went to hell. But you been here, and doing this, is telling me that I have to be strong for you. Even if you don´t want to fight beside me.
Eren instantly grabbed her hand, she stopped breathing, Armin gasped behind the room´s door.
-What I came to tell you is that, I don´t want to spend the rest of my few years thinking that you are here, alone and hurt because of me. I want you to say good bye to me with a big smile, because your smiles are very rare and precious to me.
*thanks for wrapping this scarf – smiles* they were going to die, and the only thing she could do is thank him, and giving him the most beautiful and biggest smile she had.
Then she suddenly felt the warm of his hand. That hand was very different too. Was a hand of a man, she wanted to fight with him again.
If he was going to fight and die, she will do it too. She will die for him, but this time it would be different, she wasn’t have to protect him, because she felt with his hand he would protect her.
This was the first time she felt he was doing what he promised.
-I´m had plenty of time to think about what happened, and why you left. I´m not a child anymore Mikasa.
*Armin stop fucking smiling* He was trying not to watch Armin behind the door losing his shit.
-Eren... you are tired, I think we should sleep.
*what I did wrong?*
-Don´t… don´t you are going to say anything? – Eren said while grabbing her hand closer with concern.
-I need to think about it, although you said that, Armin is asking me to fight. So I need to consider that, you can sleep in my room where Armin is.
She stands, but no one stopped grabing hands. They looked in the eyes. Mikasa was holding that thought, but she could not anymore.
*Eren told me that maybe you tried to kiss him* Armin you little…
-Good night, Eren. – she finally take her hand off Eren´s and went directly to the main room. She went to bed, and remembered that her pajama was not in that room.
*Perfect, I can´t even move*
She was so embarrassed that she could not talk to Eren about anything. She coul not respond to all those beautifull words that he said to her, because she was so embarrassed. She had already decided to go when she saw how much Eren had grown mentally. She tought all this time that he had already forgot about her.
That night she slept well, because it was the last night of her normal life.
Eren and Armin had to sleep in the same bed. Armin was sleeping very peacefully, but Eren could not stop thinking.
-Armin, hey Armin. Are you sleep?
-Now I´m not, jerk.
-Did I fucked up? With her?
- I think you did just fine.
-I need more than fine, I mean, the last time I practically broke her heart.
-That’s because you´re stupid, and don´t think before opened your big mouth. And that´s why the humanity lost one of their strongest soldiers.
-Thanks Armin, I wanted to feel better, thanks really.
-What I´m saying is that even if it took you this long to came here and said those things to Mikasa, it was worth it. If she come with us, or don´t; that doesn´t matter, because it was worth it.
-I just think that I fucked up, she even didn´t grabbed her scarf... - He said while grabbing the red scarf closer to his face.
-Eren?
-Yeah?
-Don´t you think that Mikasa is the most beautiful woman you have ever seen in this world?. I mean, our world is small compared of what it really is but, I can´t imagine a girl more beautiful than her.
-Wha…..what are you saying that of all the sudden?
-All of the sudden Eren?, you almost confessed to her back there, I just thought that thinking about how she looks is more pleasant than thinking about all this mess.
Eren sighs deeply, Armin was right. He could this night be a normal guy, thinking about the beauty of a woman, he could left that happeded just for tonight.
-I bet Jean is going to loose his mind when he sees her! – Armin says while he was laughing, trying to no laugh hard for Mikasa to hear him.
-Don´t be ridiculous, he´s with that new small girl with black hair, remember?
-Oh, yeah I know, but you know that he has been always nuts about Mikasa. He can´t see you without hate in his eyes since she left.
-Armin, don´t be stupid, we don´t even know is she´s coming with us.
Armin smiled at him, he couldn´t belive how dense Eren is. He doesn´t know if he needs to push him more, but he thinks is the only choice to make this years to really worth. Maybe is not fair for Mikasa to live with that while they are dying in front of her, but they could even die in the war that is coming, so…
-Eren, are you sure she was trying to kiss you ? that day?
Eren looked at Armin with fear, he told him that never again talk about that, this guy has no limits.
-I mean, If that is true I think that now that I talked her about that moment she problably could come.
*For gods sake Armin you did not*
-I told her, sorry. I´m sure that this is selfish, but I want the three of us to fight and win. And then come here once in a while and hang out with you guys, like back then…
Armin knew for sure that Eren was freaking out, because he wasn´t even breathing, but it was the last card for him. With Mikasa they have all the cards to play that deadly game. He was satisfied with what he did, he was very happy, that was a very happy night.
Eren didn´t say anything, what who could he say? Fuck you Armin? Bad bad Armin?. These four years he has changed so much, he had became the lider they all needed, even if he has to do bad things, he will do anything to fulfill their meta, even do things like saying THAT to Mikasa.
*She is not going to come*
The next morning Eren wake up very late, he was over thinking the whole night and slept very late. He went to the bathroom to wash his face and then he remembered he was in his house.
Now that Mikasa wasn´t in front of him, been there felt so overwhelming. It was like a dream been there, in that house, thanks to her. He was so nervious to go to the living room and not seen his mom doing breakfast, or his dad reading the newspaper. He took a big breath and went there.
The breakfast was already in the table and Armin was eating very fast.
-It´s very late Eren, we have to leave asap.
She wasn´t there, sure that she just prepared breakfast and went out to not confront him. He didn´t want to confront her either.
He took his plate and eat as fast as he could, and then she came out of her room.
-I can´t belive that this still fits me, Armin do I take my  3DMG? Or you think it´s not worth it?
She was wearing the whole uniform, and Eren just felt how his heart made a big jump in his chest.
-We will give you another, the tech team have changed some things, you will do it fine with the new desing.
Eren couldn´t take his eyes out of her. It was so nostalgic, but at the same time, she looked so different. Now he understood what Armin was talking about.
-Eren, eat faster, we need to leave. –Mikasa said to him , like if the last two years haven´t happened at all.
-Ok… I´ll hurry.
They took the horses and left, but before they take a look at the house, their house.
-Thanks Mikasa, this means so much to me, the house, I mean. – Eren said to her. Mikasa was still looking at the house that took her two years to build. Maybe she wouldn´t see it again, but it doesn´t matter, because her house is where Eren and Armin are.
-Gotta get going, they are waiting for us-  Armin said and started riding the horse in direction to shinganshina´s outside door.
-Ok, hug me tight, we need to go faster.- Eren said while Mikasa was climbing the horse.
Some of her hair got stucked in her jacket and she got upset – I think is time for cutting my hair again, you know for the 3DMG.
- Don´t, It looks great on you. *oh good, why I just said that* - just… agh do a pony tail or whatever, let´s go, we will explain the strategy in the way.
-----
*See you later, Eren*
She said with her precious smile, the one it was for him with a tear in her eyes.
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