#eren really was a dangerous stage of my life

[rottiens]

Did you ever self-insert into SnK? If yes, what was your backstory? What was your rank? What was your casual outfit like? And who was your bae? 👀

[aetheternity]

Stripper levi ackerman

Y/n and levi have been dating for a few months now. While he was working you were in the crowd amongst many women watching your boyfriend. So y/n decides it would be funny to tease him and wear something y/n knows will get him aroused. So after his shift levi grabs y/n and hurries her to the VIP room and fucks her.

(Ok so I'm super sorry about how long I took to write this but I wanted it to be good and life has just been terrible lately)

18+ content

"Oh.. oh wow." Connie huffed, eyes tracing your curves without a hint of awkwardness. 

"Connie stop staring, Levi will kill you if he finds out.." Jean quickly interjected, sneaking a couple peaks up your thighs himself. 

"I know but.. oh wow.." 

Jean took another quick glance before looking up into your eyes. His own self consciousness hitting him almost immediately. He quickly turned his head around like a fearful child.

"Aww thanks boys." You giggled, not being able to stop yourself from doing a small twirl in your far too small black skirt. Connie's eyes tracing your every movement. "It's ok." She giggled "I mean if you guys like it then Levi hopefully will too." 

Jean took another glance but then shut his eyes and turned back around. "I can't believe you're wearing that.. I mean weren't you scared to walk outside in an outfit like that? Does Levi even notice these kinds of things?"

"I'd notice if it were me.." Connie said with a soft (a little creepy) smile. 

"Shut up, no one asked you." Jean replied 

You snickered at their banter. "Don't worry Jean I'm fine." You replied "Fingers crossed that he loves it." You said with a little bounce. 

You looked over at Connie giving him a little wink which instantly turned him into a flushed mess. Jean rolled his eyes in agitation. Almost aggressive in the way he twisted Connie's head around, forcing him to briskly walk away. 

"Geez Connie calm your boner before you have to go on stage!" Jean practically yelled as he pushed Connie along by his shoulders.  

"I don't have a boner!" Connie replied 

A hearty chuckle came from behind you and you turned just in time to see Eren leaning in the doorway. "That for Levi?" He asked with a little smirk and a gesture of his hand down the expanse of your body. 

"I don't know what you mean." You said with a smile.

Eren rolled his eyes, coming close to give you a small kiss on the cheek. "Normally it's the strippers who wear provocative outfits." He swiftly nodded to the other guys in the room. 

"I felt like spicing up our relationship a little." You shrugged

"You guys have only been dating for a couple months. How is it not still spicy?" Eren set his bag down slipping off his jacket and placing it on the back of his chair. 

You felt your lips twitch up into a smile. It was always hard not to get swept up into conversation with Eren. He'd always been your best friend even when he was just your friend. Not that it ever made sense when you explained it that way to anyone else. But it made sense to you two. 

You'd both gone to the same high school but he'd graduated early and when you guys met again during your first semester you had become instant friends. 

"Oh Eren, you know nothing of love." You grinned from ear to ear. "So is he with you?" 

Eren gave you another soft eye roll as he applied his lip balm. "Parking the car." 

"If it works even half as good on Levi as it did on Connie I think you'll be all set." Jean said, grabbing his water bottle from his table. 

You hummed, readjusting your socks where they stopped on your thigh smoothing out your shirt so that the v-line showed just the right amount of your cleavage. 

It was like the opposite of a surprise party when Levi finally walked into the room. Gym bag in tow and a casual white t-shirt on with the black sweatpants that made you want to get on your knees every time. Levi's face looked scrunched for a couple seconds. His lips pulled into a tight line and his brow furrowed but it all just sort of melted away when he caught the first glimpse of you. 

Not even bothering to hide the lingering gaze over every inch of you. And he didn't have to. You loved every bit of it and he'd known from the start. 

He blinked. Once. Twice. 

Gaze syncing with yours as you came close wrapping your arms around to the nape of his neck. Thumb stretching over his undercut as your other hand sifted through soft black hair giving it a soft little tug. 

You could see his eyes waver a bit as you smiled at him and you hope that little hint of nervousness never left him no matter how long the two of you stayed together. It was far too cute to lose. 

You heard a snicker that you knew without even having to look was Jean. Eren walked past with a quick thumbs up and a smirk before trailing through to go get changed. 

"Hey sweetie, how has your day been?" You asked, hooked on the way Levi stayed transfixed. His hands curving over your sides then around your waist to properly embrace your hug and the kiss to his cheek. You could almost swear you heard a little growl too. 

The little whispers behind you were hard to ignore but you pushed into his chest a little further, squeezing one hand around his bicep before you leaned back. Taking your warmth with you. 

"What are you wearing?" He asked, no  demanded. 

His face stayed completely undeterred but his gaze continued to wash over every bit of you that he could see. Stripping you down for every thin layer of clothing hugging your body. Virtually making you shiver from his deep stare. 

"What? Do you hate it?" You questioned innocence laced in every word. 

Blink and you would've missed the way his adam's apple bobbed. His darkened grey completely devoid of amusement. Though you could see hints of lust peaking their way forward like the sun after a rainstorm. 

"Well.. I should leave so everyone can change comfortably." You said, pulling yourself from Levi's dangerous observance. 

A quick scoff sounded across the room. "Oh please." Reiner rolled his eyes. "Raise your hand if you're uncomfortable stripping in front of Levi's sexy girlfriend." He stated with a grunt, his arms crossed over his broad chest. 

A couple of the guys chuckled, some pretended they didn't hear the question and a few shook their heads as a reply. 

Levi glared daggers into him before turning to you with a slightly softer expression. "I'll see you after my show.." He said with a heavy exhale. 

You could feel his thumb on your thigh and you smiled. "Yes you will." With a soft kiss to his forehead you were heading outside. 

~~~~ 

You'd been on the edge of your seat for a while now. Partially because you were waiting with bated breath for the moment Levi would finally take the stage and partially because you could sense some slightly judgy looks from some of the older women surrounding you. 

Reiner had finally finished his performance or as he was called on stage: The Armored Warrior and you sucked in a breath as the announcement from Erwin came that Levi would be next. 

You threw a glance behind you at one of your best friend Historia. 

She gave you a little eyeroll. "Are you parading around with that 'fuck me' face because Levi hasn't given it up in a while?" 

You returned her playful eye roll. "Can't a gal just wear a short skirt to her boyfriend's workplace?" 

"Not this gal and not this workplace." She replied, setting a clean glass down behind her before quickly moving across the bar to a new customer. 

Just as she did the first beats of Levi's song started and he waltzed out on stage. His feet hit every beat until he paused at the edge of the stage. His knees quickly meeting the ground and turning the crowd into a frenzy. 

He spread his thighs, running a hand down his bare chest. And just as soon the girls were tossing money over his body. It was almost cute how they got so worked up over the body you saw all the time. 

The skull crushingly strong thighs that spread only for you and the perfectly taut ass that you could never stop yourself from smacking. All hitting the floor in front of women who would only see Levi here. 

Never getting quite the same view you got whenever you teasingly worked a hand under his shirt or kissed the sweet spot just behind his ear. 

Thinking about it now made you squeeze your thighs together. Bottom lip curling under your teeth. 

He scooted his body back against the stage, curving his legs up and out till he was in the split tearing the pants he'd been wearing off his body like it was paper before tossing it into the awaiting crowd. Instantly causing a whole new uproar. 

When he inched forward again it was to grab the pole, to hoist himself up off the floor and to do a quick little spin with one foot on the ground while the other helped him whirl around smoothly. 

Fuck he was always so graceful. All of the guys were. And yet every time you'd tried you'd bussed your ass. And he was spinning himself up off the floor in a matter of seconds like it was easy. A sort of grace you would never tire of seeing. The music blasted against your rib cage but Levi's spins were what really made you weak. 

You heard a little giggle behind you but you didn't look away. "Your boyfriend's amazing on the pole." Historia teased, poking your shoulder but your only reply was a nod. 

The smallest remnants of the song seemed to fade when Levi's eyes bored directly into yours. You swore you could see the gentle lifts of the corners of his lips. Felt his warmth as if it was pressed against you like it had been so many times before.

Watched as he circled the pole upside down in a perfect split till he'd touched the ground again and still his eyes never left you. 

The dance had been and always would be for you. His hair was tousled and glistening with sweat when the music stopped. Body glitter completely slick on his skin, making him look as though he might actually be glowing. 

He carefully returned to Earth both feet, flat on the floor. Money piled into just about every crevice of his underwear. And he was still looking at you. He turned and walked off stage while the crowd continued cheering his stage name. 

The announcement for him ended and the next dancer (Eren) was immediately announced. Before you could think about it you were racing backstage. 

You slipped into the backroom almost slamming into Eren as you went. "Oh shit.. sorry." He chuckled after realizing it was you. 

And you didn't have to say a word because he smirked, nodding his head down the hall. "He's in the rainbow room. Told me to tell you to come to him when you came back here." Eren informed 

The soft ooh's and ahh's and chatter of everyone in the room caused a flurry in your already butterfly ridden stomach as you tried to hide your blushing cheeks. 

"Th-thanks Eren." And you quickly turned before anyone else could make it worse. 

You turned a corner trying not to run down the corridor at full speed and when you made it to his door you knocked twice in the special way that only you did when you knocked on Levi's door. 

"Come." He answered almost sternly 

The door squeaked open then shut behind you as you pushed it close with your back. Your blood pooling to your feet when you caught a glimpse of Levi sat on the bright red sofa in the corner of the room. The faint smell of dirty money littering the room more and more with every step. 

Any remaining clothes he'd been wearing were now tossed aside while his hand worked slowly over the shaft and tip of his hard cock. He let out a hitched exhale as he curled his fingers slowly up and down. 

You pushed yourself down onto your knees between his thighs. Your eagerness presenting itself in the way you flicked your tongue forward to wet your lips. The cold hardwood stinging your ankles and feet but you bore it with innocent eyes as you took the reins where Levi's hands had been. 

His thick cock leaked for your mouth. And he sighed deeply as you gave his tip a painstakingly soft couple licks before inching it into your mouth with a deep slurp and curl of your tongue. Lips curving smoothly over the thick appendage. 

He shifted to get a little more comfortable just as you popped your mouth off looking up at him with a faux pout. "You started without me." You whispered up at him giving his cock another loving lap. 

"You wore that napkin around your waist." He grunted in reply. "Seems like karma to me." His voice was almost teasing as his hand reached up to brush away any stray strands of hair from your face before pulling your head a little closer. 

He let out a little hiss of pleasure as every inch of his thick cock pressed itself between your soft lips and slid over your tongue. You shifted your weight to allow him to slide in easier. Fixing your skirt to cover the draft running over your ass. 

One of your hands came up to trace deep circles into the slender skin of his thigh while the other took position at the base of his dick. Rubbing your saliva over his thick cock as a lubricant. Tears were beginning to form in the corners of your eyes with every bob of your head. But it was so worth it to hear a couple of Levi's deep groans. 

And fuck were they gorgeous. Gorgeous like everything else about this man. Your man. 

His abdomen clenched and the hand on your head gripped so tight you were surprised he wasn't touching your scalp yet. Soft whispers of expletives beginning while you eased into a smoother pace. 

You watched the flicker of his eyes in the dim light until the deep grey had completely faded and you could tell he'd shut his eyes. His hips jerked forward and in the shadows you could tell his head had fallen back. 

"I missed that cute face.." You smirked up at him tugging at his cock with quick strokes that had his knees jerking. 

He looked down at you with half lidded eyes. Hair frenzied against his forehead and sheens of sweat glistened as they trailed down his neck. He let out a little moan through gritted teeth from the back of his throat. One that pushed you forward just a little deeper till you gagged. 

His hand had finally let up. Settling for resting atop your head. It was impossible not to notice the way he was coming undone as you squeezed his cock in your throat. 

"Fuck.. f-uck.." He tensed 

His head slipped over the back of the couch but you didn't need to be looking at his face to know his lip was pressed tightly between his teeth. 

Well Historia hadn't been wrong it had been a while. And you were itching to have his dick sliding deep inside you. Have the full view of his face as every inch of him sunk into your pretty cunt. Every bit of it making the wetness between your legs that much worse. 

You repositioned yourself a little so that your free hand could squeeze at his balls. Pumping his dick briskly while your mouth went to work layering marks into the inside of his thigh. 

"Sh-it.. hey!.. did you forget people w-ill see those bites." He panted, pulling you away from his thighs with a loud grunt. "Fuck.." 

"I'd love that." You chirped, splaying your tongue over the underside of his cock. "Let them know you belong to someone." 

"Dumbass.." Even in the dim light the soft color of his cheeks was unmistakable and the heaviness of his breath made all the soreness of your throat dissipate. 

His thigh shook. A breathless moan escaping from between unclenching teeth. Definitely the fucking prettiest noise you'd ever heard. The veins on his cock slowly becoming more prominent as you pressed his tip against the back of your throat. 

"Sh-it.. shit.." He pushed your head up a little so that your eyes could meet his lust filled grey ones. "I'm not gonna cum in your mouth tonight." He huffed 

With an almost forceful yank he had you off the floor. Practically tossing you against the arm of the couch. The soft curve of his thumb etched against your wetness and immediately made you tense where he was groaning into your neck. 

"A fucking g-string huh." He growled 

"Only for you." 

His fingers had electricity sparking over your skin as he pushed a hand up your shirt. His quick kisses making you giggle and shift beneath him. 

"Off." He grunted, thrusting the hem of your shirt up and just as quickly you were slipping it off your shoulders allowing it to fall to the floor. "Why the fuck would you wear this shit to my job?" 

His voice echoed against your soft skin, pulse heavy against his mouth. 

"Wanted to be fucked?" 

"Yes.. so badly." 

He pulled you a little bit closer, slipping your bra straps off your shoulders. Back arching as he roughly kneaded your breasts. 

When he pressed close again it was to nip and curl his tongue over your areola. His breath so hot against your already sweltering skin it could practically melt you. 

"Levi.. please." Your ankles squeezed around his back as his thumb pressed between your lips and inside your taut pussy. 

They could probably hear the gasp you let out on stage. Your toes curling even through such minimalist pleasure. His thumb delved a little slower with a couple easy strokes. Unraveling each whimper, each shake and shiver from you.  

"Oh my god, Levi.." 

"Say it.." He groaned into your ear. Giving the shell a little bite that made you flinch. "Fucking say it." 

"I want every inch of your cock stretching me out Levi. Pl-please." You whimpered 

"Should've started with that." 

When he pressed inside it filled an ache you'd been longing for, for too long. Massaging all your weak spots and curving so easily into your wet cavern. Till he'd bottomed out with a graze of your g-spot. 

Your head fell back as one of Levi's hands came up to rub your stomach then quickly down to flick at your clit. He was never slow when he massaged your clit but he still always knew what he was doing and right now it was an intense euphoria unlike anything else. 

"L-levi.." 

Your shoulders were pressed into the arm of the couch and you whimpered looking into Levi's sparkling grey eyes as he pulled back and slammed inside so hard it jolted your entire body. 

"Want me to slow down?" He asked driving his hips in deeper as if it were a threat. He quickly pressed soft kisses to your ear and you shook your head. 

"No-no.." You gasped, tugging Levi's hips closer. 

"Good girl. Take the whole thing." He hummed 

He spread his legs as far apart as he could, driving his dick in a little harder and a little deeper. His hands shifting first to your ass to give it a squeeze and then to your waist pulling your pretty cunt in with every slam of his hips. 

Your mouth hung open and you arched where your back was against the arm of the couch. The material so rough and uncomfortable under your skin you knew it would leave marks tomorrow but Levi's thrusts felt so good you couldn't care. 

A cacophony of Levi's name, the couch scratching up the hardwood underneath you two and every slap of your mixed skin bounced impressively off the walls only making your urge to cum that much more intense. 

"You know where I'm gonna cum?" Levi's hands jumped up on each side of your head. He groaned. "Know where I'm gonna cum babe?" He sneered, eyes so dark and intense coupled with the sweat pooling on his forehead. He yanked at your skirt which had become thoroughly wrinkled and almost too uncomfortable against flushed skin. 

You let out a whimper, trailing your hands over the small of his back. Eyes fading into the depths of your skull. 

"Y-eah, I'm gonna paint your skirt with my cum.." 

"Wh- L-levi.." Your head was swimming and you let out a long moan that was cut off by Levi driving in deeper, his nails disappearing where they gripped the furniture knuckles white. 

A chant of "cum for me" and "be a good girl and finish." All fell off his lips. His eyes shut tight and you knew at this point you were drawing blood but Levi was so deep inside and your head was practically off the couch as well as your back. 

You tensed up then sighed, toes curling that sweet ache finally being filled. As you jerked and shivered through your intense orgasm. 

Levi's hand slammed down next to your head and now you were shaking for a different reason. "Fuck don't-don't squeeze me l-ike-" 

His hips had a mind of their own and he let out a loud gasp that honestly surprised you. The vein in his forehead looking as though it could pop any second.  

When his pupils disappeared you expected his eyes to fall shut but he just continued his wild assault of your pussy as you screamed his name. 

"Sh-it." He was breathing so hard as he pulled out. Holding on to the couch like it was a lifeline as he pumped roughly at his cock. A couple more moans later and he was finishing. Cum dripping over your bare belly and onto your skirt. 

A breathless giggle crested off your lips as you shimmied your hips back and forth repositioning his cum where it dripped down your stomach. "Fuck." You huffed 

"You look satisfied." He rolled his eyes 

You lifted a finger over his cum swiping a bit up to rub over your lips and tongue. "Don't act like that when you came all over my skirt! I have to go home with your cum stains all over me." You fake pouted 

Levi rolled his eyes again. "You'll live." 

"Levi." 

He finally turned, tongue swiping over his lips quickly. "Actually I'd like to add some more on the back." 

"Wh-" 

"Bend over." 

[randomposterofstuff]

An in-depth analysis of Mikasa’s character development in relation to Eren and Levi

Author's Note: Hi, all! As I was re-reading and going over my previous post/analysis titled "On the change of dynamics of Mikasa's relationships with Eren and Levi," I realized that there were some points that I should've/could've included. Lol. I also came up with other points of analysis as well as arrived at other realizations concerning Mikasa's connections with Eren and Levi. So, I've decided to post them here. This post can be considered a continuation of the previous analysis since it supplements and further expounds on the last post's points. But this can still stand on its own since it also talks about additional issues. Haha. If you want to read the previous post, the link is up there. Hehehe.

Fair Warning: This is a very long post. Lol.

This post will analyze the following:

1.  How Mikasa's connection to Eren is rooted in their shared history. This was already touched upon in the previous post, but this post will expound more on this.

2.  How Mikasa's character development is affected by Eren's own character development. How her development as a character is affected by this will also be discussed. This segment will also analyze how Mikasa's connection to Eren became strained because of the latter's drastic change in the latter part of the series.

3.  How "Chapter 138: A Really Long Dream" is about Mikasa finally letting go of and "waking up" from her dream. This post shall also analyze how Chapter 138 is actually the climax and turning point of Mikasa's character development concerning Eren.

4.  How Eren represents Mikasa's dream, while Levi represents her reality. This will be further expounded on later.

From the foregoing topics, it’s clear that this is a primarily Mikasa-centered analysis. Haha. I just had so many thoughts running through my mind about her development that I was eager to make this post. Lol.

So, anyway, we now delve in:

1.    Mikasa's connection to Eren is rooted in their shared history.

In the series, most of Mikasa's actions and reactions tend to either revolve around or be connected to Eren. About this, it is necessary to take into account their relationship and shared history.

Before Mikasa met Eren, she was a young girl who lived a relatively peaceful and quiet life with her loving parents. But then, all that changed when human traffickers killed her parents in front of her eyes and kidnapped her to sell her as a sex slave.

During this time, she was just an innocent young girl who hadn't experienced much of the world yet. So, one can only imagine the pain, shock, and trauma that she must have felt during her brief period of captivity. Being so young at the time, she was understandably shaken and scared – having had her family and her innocence forcibly and violently taken away from her.

However, hope came in the form of a young Eren who had gone looking for her on his own when he and his father discovered her parents' bodies. When he found her, he wasted no time taking action and immediately killed two of her captors before freeing her. When the third captor arrived and tried to strangle Eren, he told her to fight. At first, she was scared to do so, as evidenced by her shaking when she held the knife Eren used to cut her binds. While he kept telling her to fight, memories suddenly flashed in her mind, and they made her realize that they lived in a cruel but beautiful world. During this time, her dormant "Ackerman powers" awakened and thus gave her the strength and courage to actually fight and deliver the killing blow – thereby freeing both herself and Eren. As we all know, in the aftermath, the Yeagers took Mikasa in, and Eren gave her his scarf when she said that she felt cold.

As mentioned before, Mikasa and Eren's shared history is important. This is because it defined the early dynamics of their relationship. Eren was literally and figuratively her savior. He saved her from captivity and from a potential future of abuse. He also saved her from loneliness and despair. When she lost her biological parents, she found a new family in Eren, Grisha, and Carla. The Yeager parents treated her warmly and kindly, and Eren was her constant companion (apart from Armin, of course). Having experienced the severe trauma of violently losing her parents, she never wanted to lose anyone precious to her ever again. This is evidenced by the following situations in the series:

a)  When she and Eren desperately wanted to save Carla from the Smiling Titan in Season 1. Neither she nor Eren wanted to leave her behind. So, when Hans carried them away to safety, Mikasa was visibly crying and heartbroken.

b)  When she attacked Levi with tears in her eyes when he initially declared that he would use the Titan serum on Erwin instead of Armin. Armin, alongside Eren, was one of the most precious people left in her life. As such, the idea of losing him was painful. When Levi eventually decided to save Armin instead, Mikasa wept tears of joy when Armin fully recovered after eating Bertolt.

c)  When Mikasa cried upon seeing Sasha's dead body. While the development of their friendship wasn't fully shown, it was clear that Sasha meant a great deal to Mikasa as the former's death affected her deeply.

About Mikasa not wanting to lose anyone close to her, it is evident and apparent that Eren was the most special person in her life. This is not surprising since Eren was the one who literally saved her, and there's also the fact that he was the only one left of her adoptive family. Apart from these, I think that the following reasons are also possible and probable causes as to why Eren was the most special:

a)  Eren was her source of hope and strength. When she fell into despair when she was kidnapped, Eren gave her hope when he came to her rescue. It was also during the struggle against her captors that she awakened her inner Ackerman power. So, she might have attributed her then new-found strength to him. 

[Side note: I'm aware that Eren was lying when he commented that Mikasa had responded to his "command" to fight back then because she mistakenly thought that he was a "royal host." In the “Attack on Titan ANSWERS” guidebook, Isayama-sensei himself stated that "[Mikasa, Levi, and Kenny] are all part of the same Ackerman bloodline. However, their reasons for protecting their respective counterparts do not have anything to do with the bloodline itself—it is just their nature." When I said that Mikasa attributed her then new-found strength to him, I was talking in figurative and emotional terms. Lol.]

Screenshots taken from Season 1, Episode 6 of the “Attack on Titan” anime

b)    In her eyes, Eren represented the good in their cruel world. Because of Eren, Mikasa realized that the world is cruel but is also beautiful – meaning that there's also good in it

Screenshots taken from Season 1, Episode 7 of the “Attack on Titan” anime

My take is that all of these things shaped and formed the beginnings of Mikasa's connection to Eren. Their shared history influenced Mikasa's overly protective nature towards him and her affection for him. Eren was the foundation of her strength and a constant reminder that there was still good in the cruel world they lived in. As such, she would have done anything to protect him and all that he meant to her.

This is particularly important as we proceed to the second point of this analysis, which is how Mikasa's character development is affected by Eren's.

-----

2.    Mikasa's character development is affected by Eren's.

For the most part of the series, Mikasa has been characterized by her strong urge to protect Eren. The reasons behind this protective nature of hers have already been expounded earlier. At this juncture, I shall now discuss how Mikasa was affected by the kind of person Eren used to be.

Specifically, this portion of the analysis will be divided into two (2) parts: the first will be about their character developments during the pre-Marley arc. The second will be about their developments during the Marley arc and going onwards.

a)    Pre-Marley Arc

As previously mentioned, Eren was her literal savior. And she saw firsthand how he would willingly place himself in danger to protect others. She appreciated Eren's good-nature. And she likely saw him as a sort of embodiment of the things that make the cruel world they live in more bearable and more beautiful.

It is essential to consider the kind of person that Eren used to be before the Marley arc. Before the truth of the world and the Titans was revealed, Eren was a mischievous and stubborn child. Still, at the same time, he was also good-natured, determined, selfless, and courageous. His resolve, courage, and desire to protect others were further amplified when the Warriors of Marley attacked his hometown of Shiganshina and when the Smiling Titan ate his mother.

The early stages of Eren's development are relevant to Mikasa's own development. Due to his well-meaning nature and their shared history, Mikasa felt strongly inclined to side with him and protect him at all times. While this is understandable on her part, it has also proven to be problematic.

Her disposition towards Eren impaired her judgment

For instance, it has been shown on more than one occasion that Mikasa's affection for Eren has impaired her judgment. This has been exemplified in the following cases:

a)    Back in Season 1, when both she and Armin thought that Eren had been killed, Mikasa went on a reckless rampage on her own against the Titans which invaded Trost. To be fair, she was grief-stricken under the circumstances. Nonetheless, her actions were still irresponsible, and she nearly lost her own life because of them.

b)    When she recklessly went after Annie in her Female Titan form after the latter had captured Eren in the Forest of Giant Trees outside the Walls. Mikasa would have probably been killed had Levi not arrived. Furthermore, because of her rage towards Annie during this time, Mikasa disobeyed Levi's order not to engage Annie in battle. Her decision endangered her; it also resulted in Levi's injury, which rendered him unable to fight for some time.

It also narrowed her priorities and way of thinking

As mentioned in my previous post, Mikasa is not cruel or heartless towards others. It has been shown that she has empathy for innocent and helpless people. This is likely because of her own experiences with being powerless. The following instances exemplify this:

a)    When she saved Louise and her mother from one of the Titans that had invaded Trost.

b)    When she threatened Dimo Reeves with her sword when he refused to allow the district's defenseless citizens to pass through the pathway leading to the protected areas until all of his merchandise and goods were carried through. She only relented her threatening demeanor and actions when he had this cart moved to the side to make way for the citizens to pass.

However, because of the extent of her concern and devotion to Eren, Mikasa seemed to disregard nearly everything else whenever he was in danger.

An example of this was during the Struggle for Trost and Eren's military trial in Season 1. When Eren transformed to begin the mission to seal the Wall, he initially lost control and attacked Mikasa and the others. It is worth noting that it was unintentional on his part. However, that does not change the fact that his loss of control nearly jeopardized the mission and placed his comrades in danger.

While the mission was ultimately successful, Eren's loss of control was still a serious source of concern. Because of this, he was temporarily imprisoned. It was also decided that there would be a trial to see if he was either a threat or an asset to humanity within the Walls.

During this time, Mikasa was understandable apprehensive, and worried about Eren. It is worth noting that, as mentioned in my previous post, she was more concerned about him than the fact that he was still a potential threat at the time. It should be remembered that during this time, the inhabitants of Paradis (save for a select few such as the royal family and their followers) were ignorant of the truth about Titans and the world. As such, the fear directed towards Eren was valid and understandable. Yet, despite this, Mikasa was still singularly focused on him.

This is evidenced by the following:

a)    Her glaring at Rico when it was revealed that the latter had mentioned Eren's loss of control in the report that they had submitted. When Rico responded with, "Did you expect me to lie in a report?" Mikasa simply continued to glare at the Garrison soldier. On this, Rico was clearly in the right for telling the truth since Eren's powers were still a mystery and still potentially harmful to others. Yet, Mikasa was probably too worried about Eren to realize this.

b)    When she attempted to attack Levi when the latter began to physically beat Eren. She would've undoubtedly intervened had Armin not stopped her. I had already expounded on this in my previous post, but I will just add the pertinent excerpts here:

"The display was necessary to emphasize and prove that Levi, who is widely known as "Humanity's Strongest Soldier," was best suited to subdue Eren should he lose control of his abilities. Because of this, the Scouts were able to convince the Military Police and Premier Zackly that they should be given custody over Eren. At the time, Mikasa was gravely concerned about Eren's well-being and was perhaps too furious at Levi to think about anything else. Because of this, she probably did not immediately realize that Levi had effectively secured Eren's relative safety at the end of the day. "

"During the trial, the MPs spoke of planning to dissect him, among others. Conversely, the Scouts proposed that he participate in an upcoming scouting expedition to determine whether he is a threat or not. They also suggested that Eren be placed under Levi's direct supervision so that he could be subdued in the event of an incident. While the latter proposal still entailed some degree of violence, it was far less hostile and more beneficial to Eren than the MP's proposal."

To conclude this part, I think that Mikasa focused more on the fact that Eren never meant any harm. And she probably thought that Eren should not be punished because of this. Again, all of this shows how Mikasa was inclined to always side with Eren (even though his actions may sometimes do more harm than good) because of his good and well-meaning nature and their shared history.

b)   Marley arc until the present time

The second part of this segment shall now discuss how Eren's drastic and dark development affected Mikasa.

As mentioned before, Mikasa always sided with Eren because of their past and his good nature.

However, when Eren began changing for the worse, their relationship began to deteriorate. As mentioned in my previous post, they slowly but surely drifted apart until they lost their common ground.

At the start of the Marley arc (which is the beginning of the fourth season in the anime), Eren's personality had noticeably become darker. This is evidenced by his horrible actions, which endangered and cost lives, such as the following:

a)    When he executed his and Zeke's plan to raid Liberio so that they could both escape to Paradis Island. As a result of this plan, countless innocent civilians and children were killed in the process. Furthermore, several of his comrades from the Survey Corps/Scouting Regiment lost their lives, including Sasha.

b)    When he initiated the Rumbling with the intention to destroy all of humanity not residing within Paradis Island. This plan and course of action would eliminate both their enemies who were actively plotting to attack Paradis and millions of innocent civilians and bystanders.

At this point in time, Eren had changed from a good-natured and compassionate soldier dedicated to protecting innocents to a depressed and violent extremist. This change was triggered by the revelation of the truth about the world and his gaining access to the memories of the past and future inheritors of his Attack Titan.

With regard to how his terrible change affected Mikasa, it is clear that she was clearly disturbed by it.

Mikasa had begun to acknowledge that Eren was no longer the "good" in their cruel world.

During the raid on Liberio, she was visibly distraught and affected by Eren's destructive actions. It seemed that she was in disbelief – she even asked him if he was aware that he did things that cannot be undone. As mentioned in the previous post, Mikasa was even more distressed because Eren consciously caused the destruction and did not appear to show any remorse.

It is worth noting that Mikasa's empathy for innocent and defenseless people, especially children, was highlighted in this scene. When she asked Eren if he was aware of his actions' consequences, there were tears in her eyes.

Screenshots taken from Season 4, Episode 6 of the “Attack on Titan” anime

At that point in time, Mikasa had begun to realize that the Eren she once knew was no longer with them. She had started to see that Eren no longer represented the good in the world; and that he had become a source of what makes it cruel.

Mikasa felt conflicted because she was in denial.

Throughout the Marley arc events up until the Rumbling arc, Mikasa still held on to the hope that Eren could still change for the better. It is true that she believed (or maybe desperately wanted to believe) that Zeke was manipulating him, but does not change the fact that Eren was acting on his own accord.

On several occasions, Mikasa had expressed her desire to talk to Eren and kept insisting that sense could still be talked into him. I think that this is an indicator that she was in a state of "pseudo-denial."

I used the term "pseudo-denial" because, from how I see it, Mikasa was already aware that Eren was no longer the same person who saved her.  That he was no longer the same person who insisted that Historia eat him so that humanity can be saved. That he was no longer the same person who would jump right into battle to protect innocent people; that he had turned into someone who had harmed and would continue to harm innocent people. However, it appears that Mikasa did not want to accept this fact. This is why she kept insisting on talking to Eren in the slim chance that he could still be persuaded to abandon his plan of initiating the Rumbling. She was torn between reality and her personal sentiments. In short, she still hoped that the kind person who stood up for the helpless and who saved her from bondage was still in there somewhere. This exemplified by this scene from Episode 14 of Season 4:

Screenshots taken from Season 4, Episode 14 of the “Attack on Titan” anime

This pseudo-denial placed her odds with her allies and comrades. The others, such Armin, Annie, and Levi, had already accepted that Eren needed to be killed in the worst-case scenario. On this, it's apparent that Mikasa knew that they were right considering the circumstances. But she still felt conflicted because she still hoped that Eren could be convinced to not go through with his plans. However, that hope was dashed when Eren himself told them that the only way to stop him was to kill him. Yet, even then, she was still hesitant and conflicted.

Mikasa had matured because of their strained connection and had begun outgrowing her bond with Eren.

In a way, Mikasa was still holding onto the past. On this, Eren's dark character development is what caused their relationship to deteriorate. As previously discussed, Mikasa's connection to Eren is rooted in their shared history and the type of person he used to be. In the past, Eren was her savior, her family, and her source of strength and hope. But when he stopped being those things to her, the foundation for their bond was lost.

While it is tragic and drastic for Mikasa, this caused her to become more keenly aware of other priorities. She became more cognizant of the stakes involved rather than just focusing on Eren. Although she still cared greatly for him, she was no longer singularly focused on him. She became wise and mature enough to not turn a blind eye to the danger and threat that he posed. This in sharp contrast to how she acted in the past. Before, she would always place Eren's welfare first before nearly anything else. But because of recent developments, she finally began to realize and understand that there were other things more important than Eren. And I think that this is a significant turning point for her since he had affected and influenced her for most of her life.

Before Chapter 138, Mikasa was still in a state of "pseudo-denial" because of her hope for a more peaceful solution in dealing with Eren. But I think that the fact that she started feeling conflicted was the start of her process of outgrowing her bond with Eren. This is because she knew that she could no longer just turn a blind eye to his actions and their devastating effects.

The significance of her process of outgrowing her connection with Eren will be further expounded in the next point of analysis below.

-----

3.    "Chapter 138: A Long Dream" is about Mikasa finally letting go of and "waking up" from her own dream.

It has already been established that Mikasa had dreamed of living a peaceful life for the longest time. She dreams of one that is similar to the kind she once had with her parents. In particular, Mikasa wanted to live such a life with her loved ones, particularly Eren. The "dream" she had during this chapter is evidence of this.

It is unclear whether what Mikasa saw was a dream, a hallucination, a vision, or, as some fans speculate, a memory from an alternate reality. In any case, it was not the reality that she lived in.

I've already stated earlier that her process of outgrowing Eren and their bond was significant. Concerning this, I think that the said process was part of a slow build-up towards her decision to finally let Eren go and kill him.

As previously mentioned, Mikasa seemed to have difficulty accepting that the Eren of her past had turned into the Eren who wished to destroy all of humanity outside of Paradis. She had struggled to fully acknowledge and accept this fact because it was too painful for her. However, as the situation started to become more drastic and desperate, she realized that she had no other choice but to face reality.

But even though she knew this, she still felt conflicted. Even when Eren told them that the only way to stop him was to kill him, she was still hesitant. She knew what needed to be done but could not accept it because of her attachment to Eren.

On this, I think that the "dream" or vision (or whatever it really was) that she had during the battle is representative of the kind of life she wishes and dreams for. When she, Levi, and the remaining Titan shifters were the only ones left to fight, she started having another headache. And when Levi told her that they were the only ones left who could kill Eren, her head pain intensified until the dream/vision started playing in her mind.

This is my take on this moment: the headache represented Mikasa's conflicted feelings. She knew that Eren needed to be stopped to save humanity. She knew that the rest of the world did not deserve to suffer from the cruel fate that Eren wished to bestow upon it. But her emotional attachments held her back from taking action. As for the dream/vision, I think it was her way of arriving at an epiphany and decision. And on this, maybe it was this dream/vision that gave Mikasa the resolve and courage to finally accept the reality. I will expound further.

In the dream/vision, Mikasa was crying. She said that she "shouldn't be there." And then dream-Eren spoke about their decision to run away from the Marleyan-Paradis conflict so that they could live in isolation and in peace during the last few years of his life. Dream-Eren then apologized for "bringing up the past."

Screenshots taken from Chapter 138 of the “Shingeki no Kyojin” manga

I personally think that this was the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back. During this dream/vision, Mikasa finally realized that her wish and dream to live a peaceful life with Eren could no longer come true. Her dream was born in the past, and if there was any chance of it happening, it had already passed by. Mikasa finally realized that attaining her dream was already impossible at that point.

I also think that when dream-Eren told her to forget about him after he dies, this could be interpreted as Mikasa realizing that if she were to finally have a quiet and peaceful life, then Eren would not be a part of it.

Screenshots taken from Chapter 138 of the “Shingeki no Kyojin” manga

Furthermore, Mikasa saying that she "had a long dream" could mean that she finally let go of her life-long wish/dream so that she can wake up to the reality she needed to face. It could be interpreted as her choosing to give up on Eren for good to make the world a less cruel place. On this, her decision to kill Eren herself was likely her way of letting him go and saying goodbye. It was the climactic resolution and outcome of her internal conflict where she struggled to choose between doing the right thing (saving humanity) and holding on to the most special thing in her life (Eren). In the end, she chose humanity over him because she knew that if she chose him, then their already cruel world would become darker and crueler.

Screenshot taken from Chapter 138 of the “Shingeki no Kyojin” manga

A quick note on Mikasa saying that she can’t forget Eren:

Some people might say that Mikasa’s declaration that she can’t forget Eren means that she decided not to let him go. I personally disagree with this. It is completely possible to move on from someone and let them go without forgetting them. In Mikasa’s case, I think that by saying that she won’t forget Eren, she meant that she will always remember the peaceful, good, and happy times that they had together. I also think that it means that she will fondly remember Eren as the good person he used to be.

I think that it’s understandable and fair that Mikasa chooses to remember the good times and the good things. Because, for better or for worse, Eren was still a huge and influential part of her life. The old Eren and the good times they had together were very much real, and the happiness she felt during those times was also genuine and valid. I also think that her decision to wear the scarf around her neck before delivering the killing blow was her way of saying, “I’m letting you go. But I will always value the good moments we had together. Goodbye.”

Screenshot taken from Chapter 138 of the “Shingeki no Kyojin” manga

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4. Eren represents Mikasa's dream, while Levi represents her reality.

This is a personal take and interpretation of the possible symbolisms connecting Mikasa and Levi in Chapter 138.

During the final battle against Eren, only Levi, Mikasa, and the titan-shifters were left to fight. And during this battle, Mikasa started to have her dream/vision. While dealing with her conflicted emotions, she began to drift to her "dream" about Eren and away from reality. And while she was drifting away, Levi kept telling her to "stay with [him there]."

Screenshot taken from Chapter 138 of the “Shingeki no Kyojin” manga

This could be interpreted as Levi being the voice calling out to her to stay in the current reality and not get lost in her distant and impossible dream. It is interesting to note that before she began "dreaming," an image of Eren as a child was shown, followed by a panel of a close-up of Levi's mouth with no dialogue. Meaning that everything around her had already faded away before she was immersed in her dream during that time.

Screenshots taken from Chapter 138 of the “Shingeki no Kyojin” manga

This could symbolize the inner conflict and turmoil that Mikasa was experiencing. She was torn between holding on to the past and accepting the present.

When she woke-up, both literally and figuratively, Mikasa had decided to let go of her dream and of Eren. She finally accepted the reality and returned to it. She returned to Levi's side and faced reality alongside him.

Screenshot taken from Chapter 138 of the “Shingeki no Kyojin” manga

Following this line of thought, this symbolic moment could foreshadow the kind of relationship they would have in the future. Considering that this final stand against Eren might very well be the most important battle of their lives, it would be reasonable to assume that they might form a deeper connection and relationship in its aftermath. They finished it together, so perhaps (and hopefully) it means that whatever the future might bring, they would also face it together.

Going back to how Eren and Levi are symbols, Eren represents her dream. Eren is not only a part of it; it is also linked to her past. Mikasa knew that her dream was impossible to achieve at that point and that it was necessary to finally let it go.

Levi, on the other hand, represents her reality. The reality she currently lives in is cruel and harsh. However, she can control what she does in it and what she makes of her life in the said reality. In other words, her reality is full of possibilities and various choices. This is in contrast to her dream of a life with Eren, which was impossible to attain. Furthermore, she only had two (2) choices as to what to do with the dream. It was either to keep holding on to it despite its impossibility or to let it go completely.

Thus, it can be said that Eren represents and symbolizes “what could have been”. Whereas, Levi represents “what could be”. Prescinding from this, there really is a good chance of Mikasa and Levi growing closer in the future.

-----

Author’s Note: Well, that’s all for now. Lol. I know that this post is very, very lengthy. Hahahaha. So, I really appreciate you guys for taking the time to read it. I tried my best to make it as organized and as clear as possible. I hope that it makes sense. Haha. I might post more analyses in the future. Hehehe. Let me know your thoughts and opinions!

[lunaekalenda]

Heya An 💕🥺 I hope when you see this you are doing good!! First of all congrats and I checked out your event (which is so creative btw and I love it) and here is my request! (I hope it’s not complicated omg-)

💖, ❓, can it be in the aot world? Like she joined the survey crops and she is really skilled, smart and really tough and that caught Levi’s attention and he has a crush on her :,). After a mission battle she almost risked her life but Levi saved her. It got her by surprise and she tells levi why did u save me out of all ppl and Levi decided to confess his feelings first time to the person he loves and he gets all nervous and shy. (Like he just says randomly “will you be my girl?”) and hes all blushed up. And the girl is all surprised but accepts it and she brags abt it to all her friends that Levi is her man and he lowkey is rlly happy abt that 🥺 (fluff scenes of him holding her hand and all that to FINALLY show off he has a girl and he’s so cute and happy abt it 😭). Thank you and have a great day ✨

ofc!! i hope you like it <3 and thanks for participating! <3

❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁

romance + strangers + canonverse feat. Levi Ackerman

❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁

“Nice one!” Hange says approaching you. You land on the floor and smile to them. They look to the tall tree you just escalated in a very short time. 

“I wanted to try a trick that Rico taught me.” you say. Hange nods, excited.

“The one with the little tumble to turn faster and begin the descent with propulsion?” you nod.

“Yes! It’s pretty useful.” you say. You’ve been friends with Hange for a while now, but you spend most of the time with the cadets of your promotion, specially with Eren.

You have just joined the corps this promotion, training with Eren, that’s what made you two so close. You’re also friend of Mikasa and Armin. 

“Hange.” Levi calls them. He’s walking towards you two, loosening his shirt collar with a bony hand. “Erwin is calling us.” He looks at you, as if he had just noticed in your presence. He knows you, he recognizes your face though you two never talked. You made the salute to Levi, after all, he’s your superior. He nods quietly. 

He of course knows you. You’re that one that uses the ODMS as if you were executing a ice skating routine, so graceful and pretty. Hange waves a hand towards you. Levi walks fast in front of them. 

“You’re too obvious.” they say. Levi grumps.

“Shut up.”

Erwin called them to let them know there’s a mission the next day. One of the squads that went for a recognition a week ago has not arrived yet, and they want to search them. And to know if all of them are alive. Hange says they can call their squad, where you are listed. Levi nods, knowing he has to call his new Special OPs Squad. You talk to Eren to ask him if his squad also goes on the mission when Hange tells you you have to be prepared to fight tomorrow. Eren nods.

“Yes. Captain Levi told us earlier. So, I guess we have to go for that...” he says. You nod and say bye to him after you two end having dinner. You enter your bed and prepare yourself for sleeping, trying to recover energy for tomorrow’s mission. 

It is too early in the morning to be talking about titans, but Erwin is giving his discourse before you all leave. You listen to him, trying to avoid unintentional yawns. Once he has assigned every squad to each part of the army, you start to walk. Casually, Eren’s squad is next to yours, on your left. He smiles at you. Behind him, Levi Ackerman looks as awesome as usual, up in his black horse. 

The way is silent in your group and kinda uncomfortable. Some soldiers are crying and some others are screaming that they want to go back home. You try to not listen to them. You also want to go home.

No, you don’t. You’re here because you want to help humanity. If stay away from home and risk your life will help your family to live in better conditions, with no more fear, you’ll risk it every day.

A red light is seen, and you know what that means.

“Titans!” Hange says. “I wonder what amazing ones will we find today...” Once you’re near enough to them, you take your blades and swing between the trees. 

Levi saw you do that hundreds of times, but seeing your body elevate quietly, all the grace in every movement, from your side is another story. His grey eyes follow you, as if the battlefield was now a stage and this was a kinda strange ballet, in which you were the main dancer, and he only one of the public. 

He looks around, blushed. He has to center himself in the battle. Giving a couple orders to his squad, he easily finds an enormous titan. He goes all way up a tree, searching its weak point. You do the same a couple trees to his left, fighting. There’s a weird titan between the two of you, and Levi cannot predice its movements. He seems to be interested in you, but at the same time, he looks at Levi, as if he was about to attack him.

Unfortunately, you were it’s prey.

The titan runs towards you, his mouth open and his hands ready to catch you. You didn’t see him coming, you were too centered on the one you were attacking. The titan caught you off guard, taking one of the strings of your ODMS, making you scream. Levi hears that.

“Y/N!” He goes as fast as he cans near the titan, seeing your blades moving fast towards the enormous hand that was about to cage you. He kills the titan you were trying to kill, the one that had his mouth ready to eat you from his colleague’s hands. Then, he turns over himself, attacking the other one’s neck, the one that is squeezing your body so hard that you’re even screaming of pain. He never saw you screaming of pain. Never.

That’s when he realized how you’re suffering. You feel how the hand around you loses all strength and you fall. You fall because your body feels weakened. Levi catches your body in its way to the floor. You feel his warm body surrounding yours, his calm breath and his voice it’s the last thing your senses catch before you pass out.

❁❁❁❁ ❁❁❁❁ ❁❁❁❁ ❁❁❁❁ ❁❁❁❁ ❁❁❁❁ ❁❁❁❁ ❁❁❁❁ ❁❁❁❁ ❁❁❁❁

The first thing you feel when you wake up is a fluffy bed under you, followed by a softly touch on your leg. You open your eyes quietly, trying to adapt to the light of the room. Levi is there. You blush.

“Captain Levi?” you ask in a whisper. He looks at you.

“Y/N, you’re awake.” he says. He offers you a glass of water. You thank him and drink slowly. 

”What happened?” you ask. You don’t remember exactly how you ended there, but you were surprised to find Levi by your side.

“You got squeezed by a titan three days ago.” he says, looking at the marks in your legs. “I came here with you as fast as I could and took care of you.” he says. His hand feels soft and hot against your skin. 

“You? You took care of me?” You ask. He nods.

“For all the days you’ve been here, in this bed, with your eyes closed.” he says, his voice going down and his gaze showing what he feels: tiredness.

“Have you been sleeping here, Captain.?” you ask. He nods.

“In this chair.” adds. You take air heavily, but it makes your ribs hurt. He looks at you concerned.

“I’m ok, I’m ok.” you say. “But you should get some sleep.”

“No.” he says.

“Why?” your tone is concerned now. He looks at your bed, but never at your eyes.

“You need someone to take care of you.” He simply answers. His hands play with your leg quietly, making sweet caresses on too of the wounds. You look at his hands dancing on your skin. It feels really good... Levi has been taking care of you for days. He saved you and then took care of you. You thought that the one that will be Levi's partner will be so lucky...

“Can I ask you why did you save me?” you ask, out of nowhere. His hands stop its caresses and he looks at you. His grey eyes are fixated on yours, making a quick scan all pver your face. Your plump lips that he dreamed to kiss for a long time, your cute nose, your blushed cheeks and your beautiful eyes.

“Cause I like you, and i was hoping you could be my girl, y/n” he says.

Wow. You weren't expecting that. He said it so directly, as if it was the simplest thing to say. As if it was easy as breathing. You looked at him, but he was serious.

"Be your girl?" you ask. Levi nods.

"I've been watching you. How strong, beautiful and powerful you are. All those things make my mind a mess, full of you. Your voice. Your body. Everything about you is invasive in my head." he says.

You were totally speechless, analyzing every movement he makes. How his adam's apple goes up and down nervously, how he plays with his hands. You find it kinda cute, how a captain of the Survey Corps is nervous to tell the girl he likes his feelings. After all, Levi took care of you. You felt an attachment, a bond that pulled you closer to him as magnets. You smiled.

"We'll give it a try." you say. He looks at you again, blushed. You smile. His hand searches yours quietly, and you let his fingers tangle with yours. He smiles.

"Y/N, I prom..."

"HOW'S MY FAVORITE GIRL EVER DOING?" Hange asks, entering the room. They didn't pay attention to your tangles hands. A shy Eren and a concerned Historia are behind them. "Oh, you look less like a zombie." they says. "I'm sure that Captain Levi has been taking care of you really well, if you know what I mean." they winks. Levi clicks his tongue, but he keeps your hand caged in his. That makes your stomach be full of butterflies.

"I saw you were in danger, who helped you?" since Historia wasn't called to that mission, she didn't knew what happened. Rumors are fast but, the 99% of the times, false.

"Yeah. Fortunately..." you look at Levi. How his eyes shined when he told you he wanted you to be his girl. "... fortunately my man was there for me." you smile and Levi almost choke on his saliva, but his acting skills were really worked. Historia smiled and Eren blushed.

"Oh Goddess, you two are now a couple?" she asks. You nod, smiling, and Levi blushes after being caught looking at you.

"Why did the little brat blush?" Levi asks. Eren coughs.

"It's just that is weird... My bestie and my Captain..." he says. You blush as well.

"It isn't!" Historia goes on your defense. "It's really beautiful. How the two of them..."

"... are wishing to be alone and we're here. Guys, head to the dorms, our girl is being treated." Hange says. Levi raises a brow and you let out a little laugh.

"Your jokes are pitiful." he says. They close the door behind them and Levi sighs. You smile at him.

"Then... About what treatment was Hange talking?"

[aotxfan]

Stranger in Familiar Skin (Floch)

Summary: Female unnamed character realizes that the man she once loved, Floch, is gone to her forever.

Warnings: Mentions of violence and blood.

Her heart was stuttering in her chest as she stared down at the barrel of the gun. She could feel her pulse roaring in her ears as her hands shook in front of her. It seemed like time slowed down as the man before her pointed it directly at her head.

“Floch?”

His name left her lips in a quiet whisper. Desperately, she prayed that she was wrong. Surely this cold hearted man before her wasn’t the same boy she had grown up with.

She hoped he would react with confusion, hoped his name out of her mouth would snap him out of whatever trance he had fallen into, but it didn’t work. At her voice, the finger on the side of the gun simply moved to the trigger. He didn’t press down yet, but the threat was there all the same.

“I told you not to resist,” the man, Floch, responded. He sounded bored as he said it, voice lacking any emotion, and he nodded at the empty cell behind her.

Her eyes were trained directly at the barrel pointing at her forehead. Never in a million years had she imagined they’d be in this situation. Nothing about any of this made sense.

The man before her was someone she knew yet didn’t recognize. A loved one and a stranger all at once.

She and Floch had grown up together as kids and enlisted at the same time in the military. He was her childhood friend and later lover. She had once thought he was her other half, a piece of her soul.

They had known each other since they could toddle and had trusted each other more than they trusted themselves. She had thought she knew him like the back of her hand. He had never given her any indication of being someone dangerous.

“Please,” she forced herself to speak out, “Put it down.”

Her hands were shaking like leafs and her eyes were burning with unshed tears. However, it wasn’t fear that made her freeze. It was heartbreak.

She could feel her heart shattering inside her chest. All around her, her world was spiraling. She felt light headed and sick. It was a miracle she hadn’t passed out yet.

He called her name in a monotone voice. It sounded so wrong coming out of his mouth. She had heard him say it hundreds of times. He had shrieked it in laughter as a child, whispered it reverently as an teen, and used it as a form of a prayer as an adult. Now, however, it sounded hollow and meaningless. There was no affection behind the enunciation of each syllable nor any indication that this encounter pained him as much as her.

“I won’t ask again. Get back in your cell,” he nudged his head towards the empty prison behind her.

She had managed to escape somehow, yet she couldn’t exactly remember how. Ever since he had arrived at the restaurant where the Marley POWs worked, her mind had blanked. After Floch and the other Yeagerists had entered pointing their weapons, she had stopped processing things. So startled by her former lover pointing a gun at her, she hadn’t realized that she been imprisoned nor could she remember how she had gotten out.

“Floch,” she tried again. Her voice sounded like a whimper, but it had no effect on him. Where once his name from her lips would have sent him running to her, he now seemed like an unmovable statue.

Hange had warned her, she recalled. They had told her that Floch had escaped from his cell and joined the Yeagerists. She hadn’t wanted to believe it then, her mind couldn’t have made sense of it, but it was evident now that they had been telling the truth.

The Floch before her was not the one she remembered. Gone was the man she loved. Left in his wake was a terrorist who had killed and would kill again. His hands were stained red, yet his sins seemed not to weigh heavy on his shoulders. His eyes were cold and dark like the bitter sea that churned past the walls, and his hand on the gun was steady despite the fact that he was pointing it at the girl he had once swore to love forever.

“What happened to you?” She exhaled the question out and her first tear rolled down her cheek.

“Happened to me?” He cocked his head to the side and his lips rose in a mocking sneer, “Have you forgotten everything already?”

He advanced on her, and she took a step back. Her heart was beating against her chest like a hummingbird stuck in a cage. Desperately, she wanted some sign that her Floch was still in there. He had to be, she refused to believe that the man she had once loved was gone forever.

“Did you forget how I almost died? How a demon led me to a suicide charge where I was the lone survivor? How the one person in this world that could save humanity was killed in favor of some nobody little boy just because he had friends that staged a mutiny? Did you forget about the way the military you served betrayed humanity’s hope of winning against the Titans? The one who could beat Marley and restore the Eldian Empire to glory? Have you forgotten how I was arrested for telling the public what they had a right to know? Treated as a criminal when all I have ever wanted was to protect my people and serve my nation?”

Another step forward from him. Two more steps back from her.

“I know that-”

She cut herself off knowing not how to continue. She knew everything that had happened. Of course she did.

She had wept at the Battle of Shinganshina when she had imagined him dead, had held him as he woke up from nightmares screaming and covering his head from imaginary rocks, had comforted him as he seethed about Marley, and had visited him every day after Hange had ordered his arrest. She had been there every step of the way, yet nothing had prepared her for this. Somewhere along the way, he had lost himself. Burning like the morning star, he had fallen from grace.

The demon before her now was not the same boy she had once loved.

“Don’t you recognize me? Don’t you know me?” His tone seemed mocking.

“No,” she breathed out.

She really didn’t. She knew Floch, but this wasn’t her Floch.

Her Floch was a little boy introduced to her by her parents as a toddler. He was a little boy who had loved to play with her as a child and would race her down the hills in summer.

Her Floch was a cocky little brat with a dumb haircut who had decided to join the military and enticed her to follow. He was a little brat who liked to tease her and gave her smirky smiles that made her want to hit him.

Her Floch was the teenager that had returned from Shinganshina with a haunted look in his eye. He was a teen that had wept as she held him and had been woken up by his own screams from nightmares that made his throat raw.

Her Floch was the man that had swore to love her and marry her once the war was over. The man that had pledged himself to her and kissed her like she was the only thing that mattered in their cruel world.

This demon before her was not someone she recognized. He was a stranger in familiar skin, a traitor in her country’s uniform, and she could feel her heart crack painfully in her chest.

“I wanted you to join me, you know,” Floch broke the silence, “I told you to help me leak the information when the time came. Had you helped me then, you could have stood at my side rather than being locked up in a cell.”

She closed her eyes and more tears fell. He had asked her for help back when Eren had been arrested. She had refused because she felt it was the wrong thing to do. She had trusted Hange and the military and thought that their orders for secrecy were for a good reason.

Now she couldn’t help but wonder if she had been wrong. If she had gone with Floch, could she have stopped all of this from happening? Could she have led him back to the light and kept him from losing himself in the darkness?

She had a feeling the question would haunt her for the rest of her life.

“Please,” she tried again, “Please come back to me. It’s not too late-”

A cold laugh broke through his throat. He lowered the gun just slightly and pressed a hand to his forehead as if the very thought made him want to double over. His eyes made her shiver.

“But it is too late, doll. Pretty soon Eldia will be restored and all of you, the military that betrayed Eren, will be known as traitors. The people will want you hung. Anyone who stood in the way of the Eldian Empire from rising will water its prosperous fields with their blood.”

“Is that what you want? Do you want me dead-?”

Her breath hitched. She felt lightheaded and had to lean against the cell door in order to keep herself from falling.

What was happening? The room seemed to be spinning.

This wasn’t the man she loved. The man she loved was kind if cocky.

He had been her childhood friend and had seemed an extension of her own soul. She had known his name before she had even known her own, had spent hours at his home playing with him, and had embraced him with sticky fingers from the candy they would share as a symbol of their friendship. He had been the cocky little teen that had stars in his eyes when he told her he had enlisted, had spun her around in excitement when she had joined the military to follow him, and had kissed her when she had chosen the Scouts just like him. He had also been the man that had promised to love her forever, the one that had held her through all those years, and the one that had teased her about marrying her once the war was over.

This man before her was none of those things. He was a cold hearted terrorist that had killed and would gladly kill again. Nothing of the old Floch was left in this new stranger.

“I don’t want you to die. It’s actually a shame to let someone so valuable die. You were a great soldier, no one could beat you in training, you would have made a great fighter for Eren. It’s a tragedy to let someone’s potential die with them.”

She swallowed painfully. She could feel her pulse roaring in her ears, and her hands shook from keeping them up for so long.

“For Eren,” she whispered, “You only want me to live for Eren. Nothing else matters then?”

“Can anything ever matter when the Eldian Empire is facing a dangerous enemy?” He shrugged.

She shook her head and desperately wished she could get through to him. There had to be some part of him that had survived. He couldn’t have lost himself completely, surely?

“Floch,” his name tasted bitter on her tongue, “Please. You know me, you grew up with me-”

You loved me.

She couldn’t bring herself to say the last part, but the phrase could be read in her heart. She bared her soul to him and waited for his response. There had to be some part of him that still cared. He couldn’t have been completely lost.

“Once upon a time,” he finally answered, “Once upon a time I did. Now, all I see is a traitor. You sided with the losing side, doll. I told you Eren was our future, but you just stood there as Hange ordered my arrest. I really, really thought you would-”

His breath hitched and a part of his mask cracked. She felt a flicker of hope rise in her, but it faded as fast as it came. He gathered his composure again before she had even had time to blink.

Soon, the gun was pressed directly to her forehead. Her breath caught in her throat.

“But you’ll pay for it. All of you will pay. When Eldia rises, it’ll rise on the sacrifice of those who doubted it. Your mountain of corpses will serve as a throne for Eren and Zeke to sit on. They will lead this island to greatness, and you all will regret betraying your blood.”

He moved away and shoved her roughly inside the cell. She landed on her back and stared up at him stunned.

He was gone completely. The man before her was a stranger on the opposite end of a battlefield. Whatever he had been before, the man she had once loved, was lost. In his wake stood a demon who would love to see her dead.

Her hands shook as she pressed them to her face. She could feel the last of her strength seep out. Despair churned inside her.

“I love you, Floch,” she meant it as she said it and hated herself for it, “Even now. Even though I can’t recognize you, my heart is still yours. Is it not the same for you? Were all those promises of marriage a lie?”

“Shut up.”

He hissed the words out as he slammed the cell door shut. Locking it, he leaned forward until his face was pressed between the bars. His eyes were cold like a tundra.

“You know what’s really funny? I didn’t do this for Eren, not at first. I did this all for you.”

At that, she froze. Staring aghast, she could only blink up at him. “What?”

He continued and leaned forward further until their faces were only inches away. The bars dug into his skin, but he seemed not to notice. His eyes were trained on hers.

“I did this for you. All I’ve ever done has been for you. I joined the military to fight the Titans so that you could live in a world without them. I joined the suicide charge so that you could escape once the battle was over. I even joined the Yeagerists so that Eldia could rise to power and take its place as a powerful empire. I wanted you to live in a country where you didn’t have to worry about foreign enemies across the sea. I wanted our kids to live in a world where their blood wouldn’t be a death sentence across the world-“

“Our kids?” She repeated it numbly and felt her eyes burn, “I never asked for any of this! All I ever wanted was you!”

He slammed his hands against the bar startling her. She jerked back in shock and hit her head against the cot. Stars burst across her vision and a piercing pain reverberated against her skull. When her hand went to the back of her head, she felt blood.

“Shut up! You were the one who betrayed me! Don’t you remember?!” He was all but frothing as he clenched his fingers against the bars. His knuckles were bleeding from where he had punched the metal, but he seemed not to care. “You just watched as Eren was taken in chains. You just watched as Hange ordered me arrested. I wanted you at my side! I wanted you to join me and fight for our home! In my head, you were always at my side! You stood next to me and we watched our Empire proudly flourish with our family! Yet you chose the wrong side! You sided with the military. You chose them over Eldia! You chose them over me-”

He let go of the bars and moved away. His rage boiled under his skin and simmered in his eyes, yet he shoved it aside. Returning to his mask of neutrality, he pressed a hand to his nose and pinched the bridge.

“You chose this,” he repeated to himself almost as if he wanted to believe it. Needed to believe it. “You chose the wrong side, doll. Now you pay the price. Eldia will rise and all of you traitors will regret ever standing in the way of your motherland.”

She scrambled to her feet as he turned around. Her head was bleeding and she pressed one of her palms against where it throbbed. Her other hand reached for him through the bars, but he was out of reach.

“Floch, please!” Her tears were running down her face now and her vision was doubled. The blow to her head made her feel dizzy and nauseous. “Please! Come back to me! Please! I love you!”

Numbly she repeated it. Her vision was growing dark, and she wondered if she had a concussion. She swayed in place but kept reaching for him.

If only he would turn around. Then he would see that she meant it. Then he would see the love that blazed in her eyes despite the hatred that burned in his heart-

But he didn’t. Instead, he gave her his back and swung the weapon over his shoulder. Snapping into the facade of a terrorists, he banged on the door to signal the Yeagerists outside to let him out.

Ignoring her pleas, he nudged his rifle as he walked away.

“Don’t escape again, doll. Next time, I will put a bullet in your brain.”

With that, the door clanged shut behind him.

Left alone, darkness creeping into the edges of her vision, she sank to the floor. Her eyes struggled to remain open and her head felt like it was splitting into halves.

She called his name softly and was met with silence. Heart obliterated in her chest, she sank to the ground and let darkness take over. The fight had left her just like him.

He was gone, she realized, the man she had once loved had been replaced with a stranger. The boy from all of those years together had been killed by the terrorist inhabiting his body. Whoever the demon in his skin was now, he was not someone she could ever hope to save.

The thought made her close her eyes and fall limply to the ground. She curled up into a ball and let the concussion win out. Her will to fight had been broken just like the remnants of her heart.

And, as her consciousness faded into the darkness, so did all her hope of ever bringing him back into the light.

[towerofgodscreamblogwink]

reading 8-9 but siu’s art quality is based, siu gets better at internal conflicts, khun got hot ass smooth slender body and a gloss lip

hm

You know, siu got better at characters’ internal conflicts

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siu’s art quality is based

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huh, so as i said before, this season starts off with real strong character writing

and i see character’s internal struggles seems to be more on the focus now as well, i like it

I’m curious to see where Siu wants to go with this, because he’s setting up the stage nicely.

I always preferred psychological genre, so i always tend to be more focused on characters ins‎tead of on plot, whatever im reading or watching

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wow

lowkey eren jeager vibes

“and his name is..... 25TH BAM!!”

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yeah fair 

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well this is scary

bam: *calls someone mean*

fandom: ooOOoooooOOOoOOoOohhHhHHhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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stranger danger stranger danger

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*cluthes heart* best boys

i only had deng deng and louie for like a day and half but if anything happened to them i’d kill everyone

but not myself

im too cool to die

‎‎

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this scene is absolutely stunnin/everythin

the subtelty

never thought i’d experience such strong sensual subtelty from siu’s writin, huh

he improved

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oh my god he got the slender twinkish body type

i saw someone saying it on insta but i was “like nah don’t get your hopes up” but now it’s here and i’m livin for it

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so i saw few ppl before losin their shit over lip gloss and let’s just say am gonna join em. mwah

also i didn’t expect khun to be actually shocked at meeting his old gang, though. i was thinkin he’d be used to this type of stuff by now, but seems like khun is more sentimental than i thought (I mean kind of makes sense, really, considering all the stuff that happened till now... i mean he did fucking spent 7 years of his life near rachel just so he could get revenge for his best friend whom he hadn’t even known for relatively long)

also siu banned khun’s eyelashes durin this panel. fair enough, the fandom would die otherwise

also i’ll b prolly postin less cause i’ll b tryin to focus

[tundrainafrica]

1) about the social class headcanon that you write, that’s actually makes sense, but isn’t exactly what i meant. According to Isayama, Hange when she was young looked very much like Eren in the way of acting (even more with the titans), and (this part I am not sure if it is true) she lost her family at the fall of the maria wall. Eren looked like a rebellious teenager angry at everything, and recently I found out that depression in teenagers and children tends to manifest itself that way

2) (anger and rebellion), well, we know Eren was depressed (it only got worse with time) but what about Hange? seems to me she learned to hide her feelings so it wouldn't be between her and her job. We don't know her past, she probably didn't grow up in a violent place like Levi but it doesn't mean that her life was all joy and happiness you know.. 

---------------------------------------------   MY ANSWER   --------------------------------------

Hello Anon, 

Thank you again for your ask! Woops, sorry if I didn’t answer your  questions. I answered those two asks in a row so I ended up just building off of the last one. 

I don’t think it was ever confirmed if Hange lost her family at the fall of Wall Maria. I did some research and couldn’t find stuff on my end. If you could send me some on that, I’d love to read it.

I am aware at least that no one’s life is all joy or happiness. I think there is a difference though with growing up without ever having to consider your next meal and living in abject poverty. 

There are people who have had time to be a child and there are people who haven’t. So I think to a degree, Hange had more of a childhood than Levi. And a normal childhood is incredibly important for every single child. The early years are crucial because that’s where children build wonder, curiosity. That’s one of the psychological reasons behind children’s books. They make everything so fantastical to heighten the senses of the children. Because in fact, children only get full control of their senses later in life. Before they are even able to make sense of everything, everything is just a huge bubble or conglomeration of senses. That’s why children are so perceptive, imaginative and quick to learn things like languages. Their view of the world isn’t set yet by the rules and norms of the society they live in. 

That’s why asking children questions and exposing them to so many different things at a young age and providing for them is important. Children need to see the wonder of the world while not having to consider their next meal, their danger. A childhood is generally where curiosity and imaginative thinking is most easily built. 

And that’s why I say, that Hange somehow is a lot more curious, sees a lot more wonder than Levi. Similar to Erwin, he had a pretty comfortable existence, he went to a good school, he had a father who engaged him and that’s why Erwin was able to think beyond what was within the walls. Same for both Eren and Armin. Eren had his father who probably fed him some info and Armin had his parents books and his parents who were curious enough to build that hot air balloon

And, I know about that scene in the manga that explained that it was the lightness of the titan head that got Hange curious about titans. I think kicking the titan head was a good catalyst for titan research but I suspect that even before that, Hange was curious about the outside world. Hange’s interest extends beyond titans for sure because it was confirmed by Isayama already that Hange would have been studying botany outside the walls if it wasn’t for the titans. Also, the way Hange is handling the new world where she’s constantly on top of developments in Paradis etc, also shows that titans are only one facet of her scientist personality.

Besides, if she didn’t have that wonder and curiosity about the outside world, I don’t think she would have done something as ridiculous as join the survey corps in the first place.

“Eren looked like a rebellious teenager angry at everything, and recently I found out that depression in teenagers and children tends to manifest itself that way”

Although depression can manifest itself in anger, similar to Eren’s probably, there’s no exact formula for how humans react to anything. It’s incredibly complex that the field of psychology (or any other field) is just a conglomerate of people and a bunch of reports and the people trying to make sense of all the results of the experiments they made. This is particularly true in the social sciences where any findings won’t point to anything as exact as those in the pure sciences.  

Anger and rebellion could also stem from someone having grown up in a rich family with strict rules on how to go about this and that is generally how it fits into my head canon. Someone can have a good relationship with their family while at the same time have qualms about how they were raised. To be honest, I’m probably the same way. I grew up in a relatively well off family, I was a generally angry teenager but I admittedly have a generally positive relationship with my family. 

Okay to tackle the issue on depression

 <Trigger Warning on Depression>

I don’t want to be quick as to define any action or any emotional analysis as depression. Depression is an incredibly complex subject, there are biological causes, life events and it manifests itself in so many different ways. So many different ways in fact, that people are rarely diagnosed with just depression. There are always diagnoses which accompany it. 

To be honest, I went through a period in time also where I was considering ending it. I was sleeping a lot. I quit everything. I went straight home from school. Barely talked to anyone.  I talked to a counselor about it, then a therapist but it took them months before they wanted to give the diagnosis of depression. I actually never pushed through with the sessions after a while, got busy with school and eventually, this cleared up on its own weirdly. I’ll never know actually if I was depressed during that period in time. Was I going through very stressful life events, definitely. Were my answers to the tests they were giving me alarming then? Probably. They could have pointed to depression. But I generally got past it and am generally a happier person now without much intervention. So was it even considered depression? I’ll never know. Some people who are probably much stronger than me needed interventions to stay functional. They needed to make radical life decisions, like move out from their parents place, change their courses to keep going. They needed meds to keep functioning everyday. 

Depression is a complex and  terrifying condition and manifests itself in so many different ways. In fact, talking to some friends who really watched their life spiral down because of this shitty condition. Towards the later stages of depression, they weren’t even feeling anything anymore. 

Could Hange have been experiencing symptoms similar to depression? Definitely. General teenage anger and hormones can manifest as symptoms of depression. Grief can manifest with symptoms of  depression. Loss can manifest with symptoms of depression. Trauma can manifest with symptoms of depression. Hange will have experienced a lot of things that 

Note : Also Eren’s depression? I honestly think given the experiences he had, inheriting the founding titan and inheriting centuries worth of trauma, I think his experience is beyond fathomable for the average person so I chalk that as completely something else. 

Okay, to answer your question, Hange was probably not in the best mental state late into Season 4. 

Of course she wasn’t, she lost Moblit, she lost Erwin and suddenly she was pulled into a place with so much responsibility. And she was probably suffering from a case of survivor’s guilt on top of that.

Hiding emotions comes down a lot to discipline, self control and the general strength of your inhibitions.. Emotions are manageable like I could say, I have successfully stopped myself many times from punching someone in the face. Someone’s ability to stop themselves from acting on impulses, someone’s ability to manage their inhibitions is dependent on numerous factors like home environment etc. It is also dependent on the context of that moment where someone has to choose between punching someone in the face or walking away, on the context of that moment where people choose between lying in bed and letting the day go by and standing up and plastering a smile on their face. I guess, that’s the point I wanted to make in a previous post. If Hange did grow up rich, she probably found it a little easier, to plaster a smile on her face because not ever having to experience desperation at an early age, coming to the realization that you’ve had it easier than a lot of people growing up, can do that to people. 

But yes, towards the end of season 4, she was going through something. She was struggling, despite her smiling face. But really, in attack on titan, who is happy post chapter 122? Like I cannot think of a single person in that manga who is happy at that point. Please tell me if you can think of anyone. 

Would I chalk up Hange’s true feelings to depression?

Manifestations of depression maybe? Post traumatic stress? Stress with little time to process anything or rest? Exhaustion? Not being in the best mental state? Maybe.

I wouldn’t use the word depression definitely. 

Depression is an incredibly heavy world with so many implications. In fact, it’s a medical condition which needs to be diagnosed thus, I wouldn’t use that at all to describe anyone’s situation unless they have had multiple consultations with multiple doctors and have been laid a final diagnosis. 

I hope this clears things up.

Thank you for the ask again. I appreciate it :D

[dammitadolfnomorecake]

I’ve mangled the start of this draft

116

Levi felt like shit. Eren had wanted to talk to him, but after spending the morning jogging with Erwin, he’d had enough free therapy. Erwin felt that they should go away. That he and Eren should lie low until this new mess could be investigated fully. Packing up their lives to live in some shit box wasn’t Levi’s idea of a smart plan. Who knew how long they’d be gone if they went? Or where they’d end up. With Hanji and Erwin they were likely to wind up back in Stohess in some equally shitty little house in the shitty suburbs where they’d have to hide their true identities even when it was time for Eren to give birth.

“Are you sure you’re okay with him going out with Armin?”

Crossing his arms, Levi didn’t want to hear it from Mike. His boyfriend had made him a fresh cup of tea and he’d been forced to ignore it thanks to his pissy alpha. He knew doing so would upset Eren, but his bloody stupid alpha had still had its nose out of joint because just that had happened

“Tch. He’s fine with Armin. Eren’s missed him, so leave them be. Our bigger problem is if Kenny is involved and the lengths he’d go to to keep his job”

Honestly he absolutely dreaded the idea of Kenny meeting Eren. Kenny wasn’t exactly normal, nor would he have an issue with ending Eren’s life should the need come up. Should he and Eren leave, it was possible they both be murdered before anyone else had an inkling something was wrong

“Is Kenny really that bad?”

“He’s bad enough. He’d slit a throat and think nothing of it. That little fucker certainly got himself caught up in one hell of a shit show”

Erwin cleared his throat

“Yes, well, I did hope to discuss things with Eren given Floch wasn’t forthcoming last night on his own accord. Has he spoken to you at length?”

No. He’d wanted to… His omega practically begged him with those big shitty eyes to sit down and talk things out

“No. If Floch isn’t going to cooperate I’d rather not put more pressure on Eren”

“Then what do you think we should do about Floch?”

Raising an eyebrow at his friend, Levi wasn’t sure he should be asked about that to do with that lump of walking shit. He’d found himself unable to do anything other than think rationally about the situation due to Eren. Swallowing hard, his alpha growled at his thought, not wanting to admit he wasn’t capable of handling things

“Honestly… Eren and I should be removed from these decisions. We both want Floch to face some form of formal punishment for his actions, but if you ask me what I’d like to do… well… there’s a whole lot of forest out there”

And a whole lot of ways to make sure Floch could never be identified… No. His idiot alpha was far too keen for Floch’s blood to be spilt for all he’d done

“I’ll keep that in mind as a last resort. For now we need to pick the path of least resistance. Ideally that’d mean having Eren have another go at Floch…”

“You can’t sit them down together”

Well… fuck. He’d gone and said it now. Erwin waiting for Levi to continue, though they all knew the outburst was his true feeling on the matter he still appreciated Erwin giving him a chance to cover himself

“I mean… Eren is strong enough for the interview, but… shit…”

He felt like he was betraying Eren. He knew how strong his brat was, yet couldn’t help but definitely not want Eren in front of Floch

“…”

He didn’t have a continuation. Erwin giving up on letting him dig his way out when he’d just gone and dug that hole deeper instead

“Are you telling me Eren isn’t in the right mental space to be questioning Floch?”

“It’s not that. What I would like is for Floch to take any commands off that may be in place, formally and recorded, but as for questioning Floch, I don’t feel Floch would be forthcoming if it was Eren. He’s half insane with his feelings about Eren, to the point he feels no remorse for hitting Eren in the stomach nor trying to bite him. Should Floch threaten Eren, he may not be able to keep his temper. Ideally we lay low until we can get in touch with the panel, then present both Floch and the taped conversations with him”

“Isn’t that going to anger Kenny?”

No shit. It wasn’t even a question worth discussing. Perhaps if he had been more open in the past with his team about his past then Eld wouldn’t be interrupting to ask something so stupid

“At this stage anything we do is going to cause a shitty fucking chain reaction. The only path Eren and I can take is the path that will leave us with the least regrets”

Erwin gave a slight nod. His friend had tried to understand what he was going through with Eren, but not having a mate of his own or having felt the pull of a compatible partner, Erwin couldn’t come close to imagining the way all the shitty “what if’s” had set in. The biggest thing hanging over them was the “what if” of Eren having another possible drop from the stress they were all under

“I’ve already suggested perhaps they’d be best leaving early. If you were to take Eren to Nedlay and work there with Pixis until we’ve contacted the panel…”

Bringing his hand up to pinch the bridge of his nose, Levi felt a headache coming on. Erwin was supposed to be the brains of their operation. He should have been putting some form of strategy into place from the moment they’d gotten their hands on Floch. Stating the obvious, the alpha loathed their current situation when doing the right thing could bring Kenny to his doorstep, but if they backed off… If they backed off, then everything would have been for nothing. Everything Eren had worked so hard for had been turned into a joke by Floch. The shit had disrespected his omega, and had proved himself as slimy as turd. Without evidence Floch would find a way to slip through the hands of the panel, especially given they’d kidnapped him

“Even if we drop them in their laps, there’s no guarantee Floch will cooperate or that they will listen. What we need is more data on the Reiss and Reeves families that backs up Floch’s allegations”

Casting a glance towards the cabin window, Erwin felt his pockets for his keys as he did

“I’ve got a copy of the information our team’s pulled up on Floch in the back of my car. Eld, swap out with Gunther. See if you can get a dose of suppressants down Floch’s throat. We don’t need him going feral from his alpha. Levi, you’ll help me run through what we know, I want you to try and think back to when you were with Eren undercover and anything at all that might be related, no matter how small. Mike, I want you to go check on Eren and Armin. I’ll get those files. If we can’t use Eren to take a run at Floch, maybe there something there that’ll rattle him?”

The way Erwin spoke felt as if Levi had labelled Eren as useless. He felt like he’d betrayed his boyfriend, despite promising to always be on his side. This having a boyfriend thing was hard when both of them couldn’t act the way they wanted, harder still when Levi wasn’t sure he was prepared to ask Eren to go into hiding with him if they should need to. Armin and Mikasa were Eren’s real family, and the family he’d need of something went wrong with the pregnancy, as well as being the first two Eren would want to tell if everything went smoothly and they welcomed their little girl into the world without a hiccup. No longer could he make the kind of threats he’d used to, at least not in person while Eren was pregnant

“Use his family. Eren said that piece of shit was a Mumma’s boy… and on top of the shame of having a son like him, I doubt his father would appreciate this going to the press”

“Let’s save the press for now. If Historia is in danger we could tighten the noose around her neck. We’re better off trying to get her on our side, once we’ve analysed everything all over again”

Unless Erwin had a magical shitty fucking teleporter in that shit sedan of his, that would mean holding onto Floch for an indefinite amount of time…

“Tch. How the shit are we supposed to do that given where we fucking are?”

“I’ll do a run out tonight and call through to Petra. She’ll be able to discuss things further with Mikasa”

“Eren won’t be happy about dragging her in, even if she wants to help”

“Whether they like it or not, both she and Jean are already involved”

It was easy enough to imagine Mikasa had the remainder of their team already under her thumb

“That doesn’t mean we need to make shit worse for them. If you’re going out to call anyone, you should alert the panel and get the first available fucking audience with them. The whole point of bringing our families in is so they don’t wind up as collateral damage. Here we are, caught with our shitty thumbs up our arses thanks to fuck-knuckle wank stain. We’re all too personally involved now”

Shaking his head at him, Erwin knew he was right. This filthy cabin was no place for any of them. The longer they spent inside the less dirty the outside world seemed in comparison

“You know, typically people getting sex regularly aren’t as stressed as you are”

Levi could have hit him. Mike and Eld snorting as the alpha glared at his friend. Eren dropping again was nothing to joke about

“Right. Because now’s time to be fucking joking around. Eren’s already had one fucking drop, this could push him into a second, but by all means go ahead and talk about our sex life, just don’t blame me when you’re a dickless wonder and Mike’s feeding you through a tube for the rest of your life”

Erwin chuckled at his grumping giving Levi the feeling he would have reached out and ruffled his hair if the shit stain thought he could get away with it

“At least your sense of humour’s still intact”

“You’re the one who started it. Pop the trunk already, I want to be done with this cabin as soon as possible”

He’d told Erwin that both he and Eren were in agreement. That if something were to happen, then they’d leave without question seeing how intimately involved they were and knowing that as supportive as they were there was no way their friends could truly understand what it’d been like for both of them. Most of their shitty fucking jog had been Erwin prying into his relationship with Eren and how Eren was coping with this. Levi was loathe to admit that Eren really did seem to be coping better with this than he’d thought he would be. He was just as unhappy to admit that quietly part of him was jealous that Floch would always remain a festering wound for the both of them. For Levi it wasn’t enough to play Floch saying he was taking any commands off of Eren. He wanted the arsehole to sit there and to admit that he’d knowingly and vindictively fucked Eren over with what he’d done, and he wanted Eren to have that piece of mind knowing that Floch had absolutely no input into any of Eren’s actions or decisions.

[xiaomomowrites]

well if u want some ANGST what about mikasa dying in the trost battle early on in the series and eren's last words to her were some aggressive shit and oof

Introduction: I’ve been thinking about this encounter for awhile now lol. Man I’m so glad you requested it, I was waiting for some angsty shit sksksk this was really fun to write, I hope you enjoy! - u.n.

Oh and, just a warning, this one isn’t pretty. It gets a little graphic. Might be a bit much if you can’t stomach a little blood/death. This one was wild haha. Read at your own risk! -s.a.

Alright here we go Battle of Trost

Takes place shortly after she gives up and lays down her life

She stands up when the titan decides to come fuck w her and prepares to fight

As we all know, titan boi comes into save the day

Except he doesn’t lol

He steps right next to Mikasa and she goes flyin’

The way she falls back isn’t as graceful as we have seen. Instead, she flies back and hits her head against the concrete, landing on her arm wrong and somehow accidentally impaling herself on the small blade she was holding moments before (don’t run with scissors, kids)

The blade is deeply seated in her abdomen, but she doesn’t take it out. It’s the only thing stopping her from bleeding out

She’s suffering from traumatic subarachnoid hemorrhage (tSAH). Blood is filling into the space that surrounds the brain and it’s no bueno

Suddenly Mikasa feels the urge to vomit, and becomes very dizzy. Despite the adrenaline rushing through her veins moments ago, she feels extremely fatigued

The hard concrete floor has never felt so comfortable

She’s losing vision. The last thing she sees is Eren’s titan pounding the other titan’s head into the ground, and the sound of his roar

The last thing she thinks, though, is, “I love you, Eren. I wish I had told him sooner.”

Mikasa blacks out, and because the bleeding had been so severe, not to mention the blade in her stomach, she dies before anyone can find her

Let’s take a moment to take in consideration Armin’s perspective: he thinks he lost Eren to a titan, and then he stumbles across Mikasa’s dead body only moments after her “I’m stronger than all of you” speech

It leaves a bitter taste in his mouth, and he wants nothing more than to shut down and die at this point. The rest of the 104th won’t let him. But! While he’s being dragged away, Armin takes her scarf from her neck and covers her with his jacket

Movin’ on down the road, Eren is pulled from his titan

Mikasa isn’t there to cry on him. This time it’s Armin, grieving the FUCK out of the situation, and feeling nothing but guilt 

Right after the situation with Kitz and the Cannons™, Eren lands himself in the infirmary to be looked over

He notices the scarf on Armin’s neck, and no Mikasa in sight. He frowns. It’s horribly out of place

“Where’s Mikasa?” Eren asks. Armin had been silent the entire time, sitting in the chair next to him but staring at his hands blankly. 

Wordlessly, Armin begins to unwrap the scarf from his neck and puts places it in his hands. Eren doesn’t wanna touch it. He doesn’t want to accept the possibility that she’s gone. 

Armin takes his fingers and forces it closed to where he’s gripping the fabric. They both are.

“Eren,” he starts, not even believing the fact that he’s able to speak. “Mikasa… Mikasa isn’t- she’s not-”

“You think this is funny?” Eren speaks. His eyes are wide and blank. Armin can pinpoint the exact moment anger begins to override his entire being. “Not a fucking joke, Armin. Where is she?” 

“Eren,” Armin cries, “Eren, I’m sorry-”

“No, no. Fuck, no, I’m being serious-!”

“So am I!!” Armin yells and brings his face closer, choosing his next words very carefully. “Mikasa is dead.”

Eyes are wide and unblinking; his gaze shifts down to the scarf in his hands. 

“Who did it?” his voice is dangerously quiet.

Armin’s face contorts, depicting the five stages of grief all in five seconds. “Eren…” 

“Who did it, Armin? Was it a Titan?”

“Yes,” Armin swallows hard. He was technically telling the truth.

Eren lets out a choked noise, balling the scarf in his lap. Tears are running down his face. Hot, angry, fat tears roll down his cheeks and onto his neck. They fall into the scarf

“She’s not… no she’s not. Mikasa can’t be…”

Dead. The word sits with him heavily. The fact sits with Eren heavily, refusing to mix into his being like oil and water. 

He has a whole crisis about her being gone, never being able to see her again

Eren suddenly felt his stomach sink and the urge to vomit was at his throat, remembering his last words to her.

“I’m not your child or your brother!” 

“Don’t die,” Mikasa had said. Eren laughs bitterly; look who ended up dead. 

Ew he hates it, he hates himself. 

“I’m gonna kill them all,” Eren vows. 

Armin winces. “Eren…” 

“Every single one of them.”

“Eren that would include you,” Armin interrupts, here goes nothing. “Your titan… it killed Mikasa.”

postscript:

“How did it happen?” Eren’s voice echoed in the empty room, though his voice was barely above a whisper. His eyes were dead set on the hands in his lap and his entire body was unmoving. 

“I don’t really...think we should be talking about this right n-”

“How did it happen, Armin?” this time he was looking right at him, and the emotion behind those eyes was almost too much to handle. Armin shifted uncomfortably under his gaze and focused his gaze on the scarf in his lap. 

“I...I don’t think you meant to do it, Eren.” the blond’s voice was soft, afraid  of the volcano of anger erupting in his best friend. This kind of anger was different; it was boiling, brewing, it was a silent anger, it was laced with an ugly hatred that Armin couldn’t quite put his finger on. It was truly harrowing..

“That doesn’t answer my question.”

Armin studied him, sympathy filled his eyes. It was misdirected anger; it was understandable. Of course this would hurt him, but there was something else in Eren’s expression that was telling him what his words wouldn’t. They must have fought before this all went down. 

Yikes.

“I mean, she wasn’t eaten, if that’s any consolation.”

“It’s not.”

“Okay,” he eyed the way Eren’s grip on the scarf tightened. “She died of blood loss and head trauma. When I... when I-I saw her…” Armin’s gaze shifted down at the memory, bile creeping back up his esophagus and his eyes began to water.  “God, Eren, when I saw her...it wasn’t pretty. I’m sorry. I couldn’t stay long enough to see. Not that I wanted to. I think...I think she might have fallen on her blade and hit her head.”

Eren breaks eye contact, but doesn’t move a muscle. 

He wants to scream, he wants to throw up, he wants to get up and go on a destructive rampage. 

Suddenly he hears more of Armin’s quiet apologies somewhere off in the distance, underneath all the weight he’s feeling on his shoulders. The room is spinning. He feels absolutely numb, and his chest feels so damn tight. It becomes hard to breathe, and the next thing he knows, his best friend is beside him, reminding him to inhale and exhale. 

He thinks he’s doing it. It sure doesn’t feel like it, since the room still felt so tight. The walls were closing in even tighter with each breath, and no matter how much he squirmed, there seemed to be no escape. He felt a hand take his and squeeze in an attempt to remind him of the present, but time seemed to just be an enigma as his mind played back every single time he had fought with her. Or maybe it was just the important parts. Maybe it was some good memories. He saw her face, her smile, her tears.

And then he was retching, and it was a little ugly. He wanted to vomit, and Armin was crying again. What a fucking mess. 

It might have been ten minutes later, or an hour, but once the room became still again and both boys seemed to have found a solid grasp on their sanity once more, Armin cleared his throat. 

“She loved you, Eren.” It seemed like the right thing to say. 

Eren nods, and he thinks that’s the only reaction he’s gonna get. But then he shakes his head, and grips the scarf in his lap, “I love her, too.” 

[shizekarnstein]

One thing that pisses me off in the SnK fandom is how most treat as if Marleyans are the victims in Liberio. No. Not fucking true. The only victims there are the Eldian civilians and foreign dignitaries that Marley DELIBERATELY set up for deaths. Marley knew an attack might happen but didn't minimize casualties. They MAXIMIZED the casualties for their own benefit. Tybur said it its part of their plan himself. So fuck Marley and their tyrannical empire. Those heartless assholes are no victims.

I agree with you anon. Completely.

There's this misconception going around about what really went down in Liberio. People are all too eager to point fingers at Eren (not even the SC or, strangely enough Zeke as well) and only Eren. Besides their bias regarding him, I can see why: he crushed all those people and it was horrifying. In our world legal jargon that could be considered a war crime. But still: you are totally right regarding how some ppl miss the Tybur/Magath side in all of this. It was a political plot and move they decided to implement as soon as they knew an attack was inminent. They both knew and choose to use it to further their own agendas: to lay all blame on Paradis and it's demonic leader, thus redirecting all the attention and anger of the world away from Marley. You know, the country that was invading them and forcing their citizens to join the marley military to keep invading even more countries. That's a war crime. The marleyan volunteers formed bc of that.

The kids have the gist of it

Willy and Magath knew Marley was in danger: the power of the titans they had used for almost a century to opress the rest of the world was no longer unbeatable; if they didn't change tactics Marley was going down. That's why they, egged on by Zeke, attempt to invade Paradis as soon as they could to seize it's resources. But the higher ups were not ready to accept the power of the titans was declining. And it's for that that Magath and Willy decide to take matters into their own hands.

Here they are talking about all the old and stubborn higher ups they need to remove from the picture if they want their plan to succeed. As they knew the enemy was planning an attack, what best way to get rid off the old trash than to put them directly into the line of fire? It was for the good of Marley after all.

Remember: Willy and the Tyburs were the defacto leaders of Marley. By working together they had the chance to install Magath, the one able to see where the future was gonna lead them if they didn't take action, as the higher military authority of Marley. Tybur and Magath were co conspirators.

And for that goal they were gonna use the enemy inminent attack to make their play.

They invite representatives from all over the world with the excuse of a peace treaty and a new declaration of war at the same time. Using Willys charisma and good connections, they convinced them to reunited for an important announcement in the Liberio Interminent Zone.

The world sees eldians (sans the Tyburs) as dirty blooded demons. Inviting them to Liberio, as the kids told us, is paramount to being asked to hold a meeting in a dumpster. Under the pretense of good will, they were actually knowingly leading all those foreign dignataries to their deaths. They choose to make this sacrifice, to use their biggotry and deaths as fuel to justify their crusade against the island. Willy Tybur as bait, the supposed holder of the WH, was tempting. Gathering all the military higher ups an even more tantalizing one. The stage was set already.

Once they convinced the world of their pure intentions and how Eren Jaeger and Paradis were ready to annihilate them all, once their declaration of war was heard and baptized with the willing blood of Willy and all the other witness as sacrifices, and the military purged, Magath was ready to capitalized on all of it.

Willy talks about how Marley as a nation belongs to both eldians and marleyans. The nerve of that guy. The same eldians they let be opressed and weaponized in Marleys conquest wars. The same eldians that lived cramped in ghettos and at the first signs of dissidence were tortured and turned into monsters. They same eldians that were so hated, so despised that some dude could literally feed a lil girl to the dogs without consequences. Because she and all the others were demons. The Tyburs were eldians as well, and willingly choose to not only turn a blind eye to all that, but to make it the norm. They lived grand, comfortable lifes at the cost of all their people suffering. In my eyes that's unforgiva

ble.

Were the victims Marleyans? Of course not!! Why should they be? All they needed was the world representatives and the trash of society to bleed in front of that stage. Uniting the world as a whole, even mainland eldians, against the devils of Paradis Island. Marleyan civillians suffered almost no cassualities, bc I bet there were few who would had put up with the devils stench just for a glimpse of what was happening. The only marlyans who died were military. That's what both parts were after: Willly and Magath wanting to purge them, and Eren and the SC as well.

So no, the only people who died that night were either soldiers, dignataries or eldians from Liberio whose lives all made for a pretty sacrifice in order to redirect the hatred of the whole world. No one else. And they died in part bc Magath and the Tyburs decided to use those deaths instead of preventing them.

As for if they deserved to die... my answer is no. No matter how easly swayed and bloodthristy all of those foreign guests were, I don't think they deserved to be crushed like that. It was brutal. The eldians and honorary marleyans even less. They were disposable tools, poor ppl whose lives were hell and their deaths used as fuel to Marleys new holy war. Nobody asked them if they were willing to lay down their lives as Willy desired to do with his own.

As for the military that Eren, Armin and the rest of the SC felled... those were soldiers at least. People who chose to wear those uniforms and fight. If they werent so awful Id feel pity for how Magath and Willy played them. But they were all horrible and cruel ppl so I dont give a damn. Fuck Marley.

Thanks for asking!!!

[snkpolls]

SnK S3E13 Poll Results (Manga Reader Version)

The poll closed with 539 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated!

Please note that these are the results of the manga reader poll. Anime only watchers are suggested not to read if you do not wish to be spoiled about certain events! Anime only viewers, click here to view your poll results!

RATE THE EPISODE 534 Responses

WIT kicked off the arc fantastically according to the viewers! This episode got overall positive reviews, with 95% of respondents giving it a 4 or 5 rating.

An ideal opening episode in my opinion!

Incredible start for possible the best season yet ♥

Awesome opening episode to set the stage for the arc to come. Pacing was just right, imo.

HYPE MY SOLDIERS

I think it was a great ep and did pretty well with the chapters it adapted. The dialogue was there and so were the scenes, the ending hyped what is coming so much so I'm already in love!

Lack of creavity when it come to the OP and ED visuals, but the ep overall was good.

The soundtrack slaps, voice acting is on point, and the animation proves to be very promising. Overall, it's a great episode to start off the second cour!

Awesome episode with awesome soundtrack.

One of the best episodes of the whole series, which was surprising.

RATE THE OP 533 Responses

Overall respondents liked the new Linked Horizon opening, which was a great summary of the current arc, but overall it fell flat as a song that most would be willing to label as their favorite.

OP depicts the upcoming battle well!

Great adaptation, just wish the opening was a little more original

It is the worst OP of all. The song is disappointing; it sounds like typical, boring song from random shonen series.

The opening definitely had some parts to it that felt recycled from previous openings, but I guess it's just Linked Horizon's way of linking them all together.

SPACE OPERATION RAINBOW!!!

To me it looks like they ran out of time to make an OP so they slapped a green filter on what they had done already.

RATE THE ED 530 Responses

The 104th-centered still-frame ED has some mixed reviews with most of the fandom sitting somewhere in the middle between loving and hating it. Respondents overall are leaning more toward the positive, however.

ED is perfect with the time skip just over the horizon

WE GOT A FEW NEW SAWANO TRACKS. HOW ARE YOU FEELING ABOUT THEM? 530 Responses

Well over half the fandom are already pumped for new music from the series’ composer Sawano Hiroyuki! A whopping 76% already feel that he’s killing it. 22% need more time to decide how they feel. A small sliver of respondents don’t really care for the OST. Who hurt you?

ost perfect as usual

It was good but at this point everything sounds like it's been reused a bunch of times. Hopefully we get some new great tracks later on..

Hyeh

The bassline in the new rendition of "Attack on Titan" (or however Sawano spells it) is amazing. I cannot wait for the S3 soundtrack to be released.

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING WAS YOUR FAVORITE MOMENT? 532 Responses

The scene with the Beast Titan appearing with his army of titans took 30% of the vote, with Levi attacking Reiner as a close second with 22% of the vote. 10% overall liked the entire episode, and 7% favorited the cliffhanger staredown. We can all agree the battle to come has us all hyped!

I repeated the scene where Reiner appears until the end of the episode tons of times already

Did they really had to skip Levi's frustrated expression after he failed to kill Reiner? It was my favorite moment…

Levi attacking Reiner and everything after that has become one of my favorite scenes in the series. Damn!

Nice Erwin Screentime, nice Levi nyooming behind Eren

Best girl makes her appearance

the last three minutes of the episode where the warriors show up was fucking amazing

ON SCALE OF ARMIN TO ERWIN, HOW GOOD ARE YOU AT GIVING ORDERS? 526 Responses

The majority of respondents relate to Armin’s timid nature a bit more when it comes to overall confidence in giving orders. Just a small 6.3% of you guys feel you have the charismatic swag that Erwin brings to the table.

I loved Armin giving orders politely.

How was Armin overcoming social anxiety a billion times cooler then eren flying over a 60m wall, becoming a titan and basically saving humanity.

ON A SCALE OF 1-5, HOW MUCH DO YOU WANT TO GO HORSEBACK SURFING? 528 Responses

This was in no way a serious question. But at an almost even split, 35.8% of voters would totally try their hand at horseback surfing, while 35.2% would never risk their life doing such a dangerous activity!

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE ANIMATION QUALITY IN PART TWO SO FAR? 529 Responses

Overall respondents are pleased with the animation in the first episode of the RtS arc, with 54% stating that it’s the best animation they’ve seen from the series yet. 42% feel it could be better, but is also not the worst. A small percentage don’t find the animation all that impressive.

I can’t believe how clean all of the animation is looking. SUPER impressed with the difference in art-style compared to season 1 as well.

The animation is on the highest level.

i miss the thick lines the show used to have

i really love the colour palette of this season and the op especially.

IMO the color tones on this episode could've been handled better, it was too gloomy on some scenes :(

The animation & art style was almost as good as season 2’s (which is one of my favorite pieces of animation of all time) but still lacked in some areas.

Looks like they went all out with budget on this season and I'm loving it

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE CG COLOSSAL TITAN IN THE OPENING? 532 Responses

57% of respondents aren’t too upset about the GCI Colossal Titan in the opening and say they don’t mind either way. 35% aren’t happy at all with the decision to make the Colossal CGI, while a few actually find the effect super cool.

ON A SCALE OF 1-5, HOW EXCITED ARE YOU TO FINALLY SEE THIS ARC ANIMATED? 533 Responses

The overwhelming majority are extremely excited to see this arc animated after all these years. With its high levels of action and drama, it’s no surprise to us to see that the fandom is looking forward to getting this arc in an animated form!

IVE WAITED MORE THAN 2 YEARS FOR THIS IM NEVER BEEN SO FUCKING HYPED IN MY WHOLE LIFE

I've waited so many years that I'm satisfied and ready to pass now that my favorite arc is being animated

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE ADAPTATION OF RTS SO FAR? 532 Responses

67% of respondents are feeling very satisfied with the way the arc is unraveling in the anime, finding that it’s a very close adaptation of the original source material. 23% feel that it’s still too early to judge the adaptation properly, and a few less feel that the adaptation so far is somewhere between good and bad.

Fantastic adaptation.

Good pacing jumping right into the action, while staying faithful to the manga.

Overall very good, but could be a TAD better

I think the adaptation so far has been great, but I need to see how the action is handled before I say for sure whether it's well adapted or not.

It was ok.

It was very well-adapted! All the important details were there and nothing important seemed to be missing, which was something I was sad about in the last arc. It seems like everything I want will get covered.

How do we come back from there without breaking my heart?

PART 2 IS SLATED FOR 10 EPISODES. DO YOU THINK THIS WILL BE ENOUGH TO ADAPT THE ARC WELL? 531 Responses

Voters are confident that WIT knows what they’re doing by shortening the amount of episodes that will air for this action-heavy arc, with only ¼ of respondents feeling that they haven’t given themselves enough screen time to cover every last detail. 10% don’t want to say either way.

i was disappointed in knowing it was a 10 episode arc, but seeing the quality and taking into account that this is an action-heavy arc, i'm bouncing off of the walls to see what wit has underneath their sleeve. hopefully they don't ruin the best arc

one advantage of the short season is that they cant draw out the serum bowl for too long. God, that was a painful wait when the manga was dropping those chapters.

Really well done, the pacing in particular was great. After seeing it I was convinced 10 episodes was perfect for this arc. A 6-4 split is perfect.

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THE VERY SPOILERY OPENING? 532 Responses

61% of respondents agree that the opening, while spoilery, is a great summary and teaser of what is to come for those who only watch the anime. Without context, they can’t know what every last symbolic image in the opening means, after all! 23% of voters expressed distaste at how much WIT is spoiling the viewers, however. 9% aren’t even concerned about it.

The whole opening was just one big “fuck you” to people who don’t read the manga.

it only becomes obvious b/c manga readers keep pointing stuff out. Yes, the intros have always hinted at things but it goes so fast that I don’t think every person will know exactly what something means if they’re anime only.

The Opening is good representation of this phase of the story ending.

I don't get why people are making a big deal over the "spoilers" in the opening when they're not even anime-onlies themselves in the first place.

Man, it only seems spoilery for those of us who know what's coming. Anime onlies don't understand the context of the images, so they can't recognise them as spoilers unless it's directly identified as such! We gotta stop judging this stuff from the perspective of someone who already knows what's coming.

It's definitely not holding back on the indications that'll happen in the arc

HOW DID THE NEW ED MAKE YOU FEEL? 527 Responses

61% of manga readers felt nostalgic seeing the images of the 104th during their trainee days coupled with a somber song. 20% felt sad about the ending, and 15% were just disappointed with the entire thing.

Lazy ending.

WHAT DID YOU THINK ABOUT THE RED EYES ON THE TITANS? 533 Responses

Just over half of the fandom feel that the red-eyed pure titans was a cool aesthetic to add to show that they are under some form of control by a shifter. 33% feel it’s a cool addition, but not really necessary. 11% don’t care.

I was on board with the red eyes until the cart titan also had them. No longer made any sense.

I don't get why Pieck's eyes are red when she's not a mindless being controlled by Zeke…

Like the red eyes but why does Pieck have them too.

WHICH SCENE FROM THE PREVIEW ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO? 530 Responses

Perhaps unsurprisingly, over half of the fandom is most hyped to see the Eren vs. Reiner showdown in Shiganshina. Although not far behind, 28% of respondents are excited about Erwin’s badass unhooding moment as he challenges Reiner.

THUNDER SPEARS FOR NEXT CHAPTER!!!!!!!!!!

ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE?

Even though I totally know what will happen, the episode is written and directed in a way I still get goosebumps and forget I actually know what will happen. And the music, oh god. That's amazing. These two together have a really good effect.

I need the next one RIGHT NOW.

AAAAAHH!!!!

It was an introduction episode, so imo, it's just there to put the basis for the rest of the season. There was a good balance between the "emotionally charged" scenes and the more quiet ones, all this accompanied with an increasing tension in the background.

I wish theyd reanimated the scene of armin talking to eren about the opening instead of just reusing the animation from season 1.

that Zeke smile is like : hey there, i am here to euthanize you all. Love it !

I'm buying tickets into denial islaaand, bye, bye!

Airpipes. AIRPIPES. p.s. cracking soundtrack

Reiner has been enjoying himself some Marley protein, he extra swole now.

Armin was the MVP

PIECK!!!

I don't like the fact that WiT decided to spoil a lot. Some anime onlies already have guessed that Armin is going to be burned and then will become the next CT. So the serumbowl won't be as emotional and exciting for them anymore. I don't understand why WiT decided to do such thing. Don't they want anime-onlies to enjoy the show?

Exactly as expected you'll find a strange titan next to the beasty

I love Mikasa’s improved design and hope they show more of her working in a team like the manga. Focusing on the mission ect without pandering

RIP nameless soldier killed by Reiner.

Very happy to get a glimpse at best girl Pieck

Really no questions about our exactly right girl in this poll ? I am dissapointed :/

Watching this episode is bringing back all the suspense and awe I felt when I read this part in the manga. What a treat to be able to relive it!

They did a great job at keeping the tension and the "well shit everything's about to go wrong" from chapters 73 and 74, and managed to make the explosion at the end worth it, despite the fact I still think Reiner's continued survival throughout the arc is stupid and wish the anime had changed it so it'd be more believable, but here we are.

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 514 Responses

Thank you to everyone who participated! We’ll see you again in a few days!

[ghostmartyr]

SnK 99 Thoughts

This post brought to you by liberal stealing from The Mincing Mockingbird: Guide to Troubled Birds. Because why not.

If you don’t think the ending tagline couldn’t be greatly improved by the addition of Gurren Lagann’s narrator, you are wrong.

So if this month was meant to make me think that everyone in that audience doesn’t have a gigantic destruction flag planted squarely in their midst, well, I’m clearly getting all the wrong signals.

We’ve got significant people from a bunch of major governments come to call. The higher up Marley soldiers that the people who actually run Marley don’t like are chilling. The Warrior kidlets have great seats. The parents of former Warrior kidlets have great seats. There are reporters. There’s a grand reclassification of a lie to an audience ever ready to redirect their Eldian fears and hatred. The current Warriors have been awayed from the premises. People from the East Sea Clan exit before the production even gets started. Willy is manning the stage.

All I’m saying is that if something were to go horribly wrong and a collection of mangled bodies appeared in the place of the crowd, it could be done without causing severe problems for either side of the conflict that we’ve come to know. The most significant losses would be the successor kidlets, and when it comes to the timeframe likely to be covered by the immediate plot, that’s close to irrelevant.

Except as meaningful emotional trauma for the current Warriors (plus Falco), who have ever so conveniently been removed from the audience.

The tension in this chapter points to something exploding, and I... really don’t feel comfortable pointing to any one side as the cause.

In one corner, you have Willy going to pieces over exposing a truth that his family has kept secret for a hundred years. Arguably, that’s a great reason to feel nervous. In the presence of Suspicious Happenings, it becomes one more tally.

In the adjacent corner, you’ve got a prominent member of the East Sea Clan coming to say hello to Willy before his performance. Despite the nation having the most noted interest in not being friends with Marley in the past, Miss Kiyomi is a quality of guest who is free to enter the green room at will, and implies knowing exactly what Willy is up to, and considers some combination of his behavior brave.

Then immediately leaves before his show starts.

In yet another corner, which is actually the nosebleed section of the show, Magath is expecting reports on anything unusual, and absolutely no one is calling the sudden departure of every single present Warrior unusual. Or one of the East Sea Clan peeps leaving early. Or Reiner straight-up vanishing with a Warrior candidate.

In a corner that is actually another basement, Eren is destroying what’s left of Reiner’s stability. By far the easiest corner to make sense of, but sense making is not for the early portions of this post.

Meanwhile you’ve got one faction definitely up to some immediate shady business, because you can’t really say dropping people down a hole is the act of a friend. Unless you subscribe to the Itachi Uchiha school of friendship, in which case, A+.

All that combined leaves us with a terrified circus master, and every prominent piece of plot significance being rushed away from the stage. With three of the available four Marleyan Warriors being collected in holes. The only one not in a hole is closest to Magath, as well as the brother of public enemy number one.

If something were to go wrong, the only Titans not in holes and known to be in Marley are the War Hammer and the Beast.

What gets interesting is that Eren is undeniably the party responsible for Reiner being in a hole, yet the obvious Marley counters to Eren and everything he stands for do absolutely nothing about preventing more Titans from finding themselves in holes. The page where Magath asks for reports on anything unusual, even the smallest detail, is accompanied by Willy stress drinking, and followed directly by the isolation of their Warriors.

Not a single person from Marley finds the departure of their Titans from the production worth commenting on. Pieck and Zeke both have marks of hesitance at complying with their instructions, but absolutely no one on the side they’re supposed to be signed to expresses any concern.

Even though they’re expressly looking out for anything unusual.

I like the idea of Paradis folks continuing their love affair with basements, and I think it would be neat if they’re responsible for Galliard and Pieck’s situation just because we’d get to see Our Heroes in action for the first time in ages, but... no one in the Marley chain of command finds this weird?

Their most powerful weapons get carted off on the night of a declaration of war, and it’s not worth a comment?

Blaming Marley for everything is really easy most of the time, because they’re generally up to no good. In this case, the only thing that’s stopping me is Eren’s involvement. Yeah, no one raises any alarms when Pieck, Galliard, and Zeke make their exit, but there’s also been no one casting suspicious looks at Reiner’s absent seat.

It seems like a really easy thing to claim that whatever happens next, Marley wants their A-listers carefully out of the way, but that would include Reiner. If they are involved, not knowing where Reiner is would be a major concern; you don’t drop people down holes unless the next move is going to be dramatic, and as wonderful as improv is, a lot of great drama works best if you know where your cast is.

Which introduces another fun question: Do the powers that be know where Reiner is?

The baseball mitt from last chapter at least planted the seeds of possibility for communication between Eren and Zeke. If (and the strength of that if is still in question) they have been in contact, and Zeke knows what Eren’s plans are for Reiner, in theory, Marley knows where all the major players are.

Zeke is Magath’s golden boy. He’s also Eren’s brother. He’s in the unique position of having ties that could make him privy to both sides’ tactics here.

He is also, as previously mentioned, the only one not in a hole.

I have no idea whose plan is winning out here, but the sense I get is that there is some kind of “I know you know I know you know” hustling going on, and someone is planning to take advantage of the openings that the other side’s plan leaves.

Basically, the one thing that can be said for certain is that someone is plotting a thing. Too many pieces have been moved too deliberately.

You’d think pinning the blame for a war that hasn’t started yet on a person you’ve never met would be enough for one night, but where’s the fun in that.

...I guess I’m already close enough to that to dive right in, so yeah, in the non-conspiracy theory section, Marley still continues to be horrible!

Like. Let me see if I have this right.

Diet Reiss’ production is all about revealing the true story of the island’s origins. It did not come about purely through the strengths of the Tybur family and Helos, but by the grand design of Karl Fritz.

Karl moves a whole bunch of Eldians off to Paradis and quarantines them, leaving behind a threat that is a total lie, because he’s actually sworn to peace.

He’s the true hero of Marley’s liberation, and so deeply ashamed of what his people have done that he offers up complete surrender to any of Marley’s decisions involving his people. Because his people have no inherent right to life, and he has the right to offer their lives up as part of his personal atonement--though in the meantime, if Marley could hold off a bit on killing them until he’s dead, that would be super rad.

Essentially, continuing the theme of bad parenting, we enter the names of the fathers of modern society, because wow were you all about grand gestures that don’t mean a damn thing and screwing over lots of people because it was easier than fixing the base problems.

Following that, though Willy leaves that part of the story out, Marley proceeds to tarnish the good name of the one Eldian King who helped them for the next century. While reminding all the good little Eldian children that the island is pure evil, and they should do their very best to not be like that.

Yeah, the shocked looks on the kidlets’ faces are depressing.

And of course, the reason Willy is explaining that they’ve spent a hundred years lying about the island is because, hey, the island may have started out a totally chill utopia, but in recent years, the ~*evil*~ Eren Yeager has stolen the power keeping it that way, and now the island’s back to being a real threat that we’ve absolutely gotta do something about!

So enters the latest chapter in Marley being terrible.

This makes my head hurt.

“Surprise, King Fritz was the good guy all along, and we were lying about how dangerous the island was!

Except now we’re not lying and it’s back to being dangerous.

Burn the witch.”

It’s like the boy who cried wolf, only the boy is also a wolf, so are the poor sheep, and really, however it plays out, any peasants unfortunate enough to listen to the boy wolf’s warning are going to get eaten alive. As are the wolves standing on the wrong side of the property line.

The point is, I hope this story ends with Willy being disemboweled.

In other news, Annie’s dad qualifies as one of the better parents we’ve seen solely because he actually cares about his daughter being alive.

Seriously, Reiner’s mother is terrible. She’s so pleased for Bertolt’s father, dying with all of the comforts Marley has to offer because his son dies a noble death as a teenager, and tries to extend that compliment to Annie.

Lady, as far as you know, you’re talking about dead children that your own selfishness condemned. Your son is a basket case thanks to trying to make your life better while you were too much of a coward to do something about it yourself.

(It is more complicated than that. I am not in the mood to care.)

Just... what the heck. A parent caring about their child living should not be noteworthy. The fact that Mr. Leonhart’s honorary status means less to him than his child should be a normal thing, and it isn’t.

If it wouldn’t permanently break Reiner (save that for the things that actually are his fault), I’d be in favor of Karina being disemboweled as well. She’s the only one who’s gained anything out of Reiner’s mission, and she’s happy to take advantage of the spoils even though it’s ruined her kid.

Though to be fair, it’s entirely possible that she hasn’t paid Reiner enough attention to notice that.

Speaking of Reiner!

I do like the opening flashback, bringing the old man up again.

Annie and Bertolt can’t help but dwell on some of the unpleasantness they’ve seen and caused, but Reiner avoids thinking too deeply about it until it slams into him like the Armored Titan slams into walls.

Today, playing the role of the Armored Titan, we have Eren!

Playing the role of walls, the much acclaimed, ever loved, sanity of Reiner!

Yeah, that’ll go well.

Eren’s done his homework. He’s already injured, so restraints won’t stop him from transforming if he needs to, and the massive destruction that a transformation from either one will cause means that he can get his point across without violence getting in the way. If they fight properly, people will die, so play nice.

(For the record, unless he’s fallen off the deep end worse than anticipated, I don’t think he ever intends to harm the people he’s effectively taken hostage. Eren’s always cared about life. Removing that during a timeskip is cheating of the highest magnitude. More to the point, though, Eren’s chosen a threat that requires absolutely no follow through to be effective. Reiner cares about life, too. It’s pure psychological torment, but the only one hurt by it did sort of kill his mother and thousands of other people.)

Reiner’s expressions this chapter are a gift. He’s terrified out of his wits, confronted by a ghost whose memory put a gun in his mouth, and no part of that strain gets kid gloves.

My favorite part, though--well, if I’m honest, there are several favorite parts to this show.

The first one is Reiner’s response when Eren tells him that he’s here to do the same thing that Reiner did.

There’s a lot to be said about how Reiner deals with being a fundamentally moral person who has done a long string of terrible things.

The summary is, “Not well,” but this whole sequence is such a dang microcosm of why Reiner’s head ends up snapping.

He serves Marley. He does his best for them. He protects his home, his family, his comrades. It’s his duty, and everything outside of that isn’t something he needs to think about. He puts it best when he transforms on top of the wall. He doesn’t know what’s wrong or right, but he’s going to see his mission through to the end.

Except Reiner likes to hide his own moral complexities from himself.

He’ll go along with whatever Marley’s plan is. With distinction, even.

But the second Eren says that he’s going to do what Reiner did, there’s only one response. He’s shaky, scared, and horrified. Because what he did to Eren’s people is an abomination. Reiner can’t even grasp why someone would want to do something like what he did.

Eren understands Reiner’s choices better than he does.

He is not gentle about it, and he’s not kind, but Eren gets what Reiner’s lost in the storm of his own conscience.

“You guys were trying to save the world.”

I think somewhere in the last four years, Reiner forgot that he meant that justification. The things he’s done have practically destroyed him. There isn’t any apology or action that can make up for it. He’ll stick to his mission, because he’s a Warrior, but outside of that frame of reference, there is no escaping the horrors or guilt.

(So work really hard at sticking to that mindset.)

But when he first joins the military on Paradis, he states his intentions clearly.

He’s here to save humanity.

Whatever he’s done, and whatever will come after, he means that.

It just so happens that what comes after is so horrible that I don’t think he can bear to connect what he’s done with anything like good intentions.

Eren still can.

He spends the whole chapter sending Reiner to a place that he would very much kill himself to get out of, and he’s still the one who looks at Reiner, and the awful, horrible things Reiner has done to his life, and say that it was born of good intentions.

Reiner hasn’t had the luxury of that kind of understanding. Ever. He can’t get it from himself, because his heart or mind would break at even having the conversation. He’s not going to get it from his friends, because one’s dead and the other mostly hated him before he left her behind. All that he has is memories he can’t share, and guilt that no one around him could even begin to understand.

And Eren might not be okay with any of it, but he sees the one kernel of good that is torturing Reiner, and he acknowledges it. They’re both between a rock and a hard place, and they’re trying to save the world.

It’s a more generous description of what Reiner’s done than he would ever be able to offer himself, even believing it, and for a second, I think the fact that Eren sees that gives him a sliver of hope.

He can’t keep it, because Reiner is damaged beyond belief, but for those few moments, he has someone who understands the best of him.

Best ship or best ship?

Naturally, they’re both still on opposing sides, Eren has just been announced as the world’s Worst, and Falco is watching this all quietly screaming, but hey, something went sort of okay and people aren’t yet dead.

Tune in next month to see that changing.

Oh, wait, I don’t think I did proper justice to Falco’s experience.

There we go.

[aetheternity]

I have a request

Levi's wife y/n and 4 or 5 year old son get kidnapped by kenny and the military police. They get taken to the crystal cave with eren and historia. So when levi comes to save them he is livid and is quickly taking down every mp in his way. Luckily both y/n and her son make it out safely with levi and his squad.

Levi, y/n, and their son have a soft moment and they all hug and give kisses 😚😚😚 and day squad teases them

(I added my own little spin to this where Y/N is playfully argumentative and sometimes wild with Levi. Hope that's ok! I also thought it would be cute if Levi and Y/N’s son was named after Levi’s late friend Farlen.)

"We have more than just Historia and Eren now." Levi grunted, facing Hange. "My son and Y/N were taken as well."

"We can't wait then. We'll leave as soon as possible."

Levi squeezed the paper Hange had given him earlier in his grasp as his squad whooped and hollered behind him. Kenny probably wouldn't kill them, they were insurance after all. Which was that much worse for Levi.

He already knew if he didn't manage to calm himself before they got to Kenny he would lash out recklessly. The one thing he'd told his wife and son to never allow themselves to do.

~~~~

"Oi." Levi stepped closer, concern etched onto his face. His eyebrows scrunched where he looked into his wife's eyes. "If you continue moping around our child's health will be at risk and yours. The doctor already told you that."

She turned, eyes narrowed and lips tight where they were pulled into a frown. "What else am I supposed to feel? The father of my baby is running around dodging death. Am I supposed to be happy Levi?"

Levi rolled his eyes, his hand already coming up to the bridge of his nose in expectation for the upcoming brawl of sorts. "I'll be alive for the birth of our son."

"Will you though?" She stepped closer, challenge rising in her tone and eyes.

"I'm not leaving you or the soon to be kid we've made. And you already know that." He fought back. "I'd sooner go back to the underground."

Her hands ran up to his collar tugging him closer. And he let her, let every bit of fury trapped beneath those stone cold eyes run over his spine like a flash of lightning all with the same neutral expression.

"I'm so serious you wouldn't even believe. If you don't come back one of these days and I have to raise this baby all on my own. I'm gonna bring you back to life just so I can kill you again. Do you hear me Levi Ackerman?"

Levi let out a little huff and a small smirk ran over his lips. She let him go and he straightened out his collar. "You get scarier everyday." He remarked "Way scarier than any damn titan."

He grabbed her wrist, pulling her down the mostly empty corridor. "You saw the doctor again today right? Tell me what happened."

"We've got a healthy Ackerman on our hands. He's grown bigger than he's supposed to be at this stage actually." She smiled softly as she placed a hand on her belly. "Probably cause he has your blood."

"Tch, moron. He's already his mother. Constantly kicking every time I touch your belly. He's gonna be a brat just like you."

"I hope he gets my height and not yours."

"For his sake your height instead of your mouth would be good."

"My mouth has gotten you through many long nights so I wouldn't complain if I were you."

Levi playfully rolled his eyes as Y/N's soft laugh filled the corridor. Her eyes shining brighter than they had her whole pregnancy. It was weird Levi had always heard about new parents being scared but he barely was.

When he'd found out he'd been more surprised than anything but he'd barely even had the time to over analyze the situation until that night. This unbelievably wild girl was the mother of his child. What more could he want.

Fear did dawn on him. Knowing he'd have something new in this world that needed his protection. Something so precious and small to protect. But another part of him knew that kid would be safer if he got his mother's fighting spirit.

"Hey, you better not be thinking about other girls." Y/N huffed as she poked at Levi's forehead.

Levi grabbed her finger. "Dumbass, no one else would be able to handle you if I left."

"Just sounds like you're making excuses so that you don't have to tell me, you adore me and could never find anyone else who brings you this much joy."

"No." That barely even scratched the surface..

~~~~

"Do you have a location on them?" Hange asked

"There're a whole bunch of military police and Kenny's squad is surrounding the entire area. But no sign of Kenny himself or any of the people who were taken." Sasha replied

Levi huffed, brain not wanting to retreat to the worst possible scenario. Besides the conversation currently developing in front of him there was a sort of quiet drifting in the atmosphere.

"We have a plan right?" Armin suddenly asked

And Hange nodded, "You're gonna need these." Her hands clasped around the cool metal of the signal flares.

"Signal flares??" Jean stared in disbelief

"Don't worry, we're getting out of here alive hostages and all." Hange stated before turning to Levi. "They're ok."

Levi blinked, slowly but surely uncurling his fists. He looked around to the others their faces a mix of concern and in certain cases glee. But they all had the same sentiment.

"Put the plan into motion." Levi stood

~~~~

It went surprisingly quickly. From the barrels they'd deployed to the signal flares being shot off. Sasha and Mikasa taking out the military police like no one's business but Levi could already feel his Ackerman rage growing.

Where the hell was Kenny? He thought.

His question was soon answered when a bullet flew past his cheek immediately drawing blood. The next bullet striking an ice pillar with a hard crack as he ducked for cover behind it.

Levi paused repositioning himself to jump and land behind one another of the thick pillars searching for the source of the bullets. "Where the hell are they?" He grunted voice raspy, thick and loud where he called to the only person that would be behind this.

Kenny's laugh was boisterous, heavy where it bounced between each pillar. The amount of sweat that had collected on Levi's palms had his weapon slippery in his grip and the vein in his forehead was close to popping.

"I think you have other things here you should be concerning yourself with."

In the blink of an eye Levi's head shot backwards, Jean's scream mixed with the heart shattering sound of Hange hitting one of the pillars caught his attention. A bullet releasing her blood as she slipped and rolled over against the ground like a discarded toy.

"Tch!"

"Levi! Oi you should be worried about me. After all. Your little family dies by my call!"

If Levi was boiling before his blood was erupting now. With incredible skill and speed he bounced his way around the pillars dodging each bullet as Kenny shot them out. His agility raised as he flipped over Kenny's form and behind him. In an instant Levi was tossing a bag full of flammable liquid in time to meet his next shot.

When the bag tore open Levi flew forward, through burning flames created by Kenny's gun tossing his blade. The motion caught Kenny off guard but he managed to dodge it, his hat flying off into a nearby pillar along with Levi's blade to hold it up there.

Levi's heart was hammering taking the advantage he'd managed to get he flew at Kenny with incredible speed slicing through his torso almost like it was butter. In the heat of adrenaline Levi watched as Kenny's body fell to the ground of the cool cavern.

He landed with a hard breath before retracting the odm gears hooks. He couldn't wait any longer. He couldn't stop himself from running forward no matter how stupid and dangerous it was.

He heard bits and pieces of speech behind him. "Follow Captain!" And "Wait, hold on!" But none of it stopped his feet.

He skidded in his pace as he heard soft calls of, "Dad! Dad!"

And he was immediately headed for it. A bit of relief flooding his chest as he heard the faint sounds of odm gear clanging behind him. His squad clearly keeping good pace.

When he arrived he instantly locked eyes with his five year old son and wife.

"Dad!" Farlen's voice echoed. He didn't look injured from what Levi could tell and neither did Y/N. Farlen's hair tosseled as if he'd merely been running outside.

"Where are Historia and Eren?!" Mikasa called as she ran up behind Levi.

"Guys!" Historia's voice boomed. She slunk forward barely supporting Eren's weight. His shirt gone and his face covered in blood.

Levi quickly ran to untie Y/N and Farlen immediately embracing Farlen when he jumped into his arms. If he were any other kid Levi would probably be questioning why he hadn't shit his pants and why his face was tearless. But he definitely wasn't any other five year old.

"Geez, you guys took forever." Y/N remarked, stretching her hands above her head. "I was about to wreck all these Military brats butts for you." She said with a smirk at Levi.

Levi huffed, rubbing his son's back. "Next time you can save yourself then." He remarked giving Farlen a soft head rub.

"Ugggh Mom.. Dad not now.." he sighed

"There won't be a next time!" Y/N fought back. "I'll never get caught up like that again."

"Tch, whatever."

"Are you challenging me Mr. Ackerman?"

"You're a brat, Ms. Ackerman."

"How about I show you how much of a brat I can really be?" She chuckled with a dark smile etching over her features. She pulled him closer, hugging his and Farlen's form with a firm hand on Levi's lower back.

"Don't start something you can't finish." Levi whispered back.

"Ewwwwww.." Farlen mock gagged between them.

Y/N just laughed loudly. "You'll understand when you have someone you love to hate, Farlen."

"Yeah.. I'm with Farlen. That's eww." Connie remarked with a shake of his head.

The others soon joined in with their own little laughs and teasing words. "I can't believe how soft Captain can be." And "They're such a cute family I hope I get that some day."

Levi repositioned Farlen on one arm ignoring all the chatter. Though his cheeks bloomed a rosy color that was extremely unmistakable "Historia, where's your father?"

"He escaped before you guys got here. He's headed toward the wall." She replied

"We've gotta hurry then."

(I'm so sick of people on the internet rn I swear🙄)

[amessycorner-blog]

Zeke: adult brain, childish heart

Thank you, Isayama-sensei, for giving us a chapter chock-full of new meme material! " As expected of Pieck " will be the new " What is it, Eren? "

… jokes aside, I wanted to take advantage of this month's daily dose of Zeke to talk about something I've had in my head for a while, but couldn't express properly ( not being native to this language certainly doesn't help ). Bear with me if I make little sense; I'll try to tackle this topic to the best of my abilities.

Soooo… this post is about Zeke, of course; however, I won't tackle his patented Zeekretz , as tempting as it is, but his personality; bacuse since his very first appearance in the manga, I've always found him the most interesting, intriguing character in the whole story.

That's one way to make an impression, I guess.

In his first appearance, Isayama went out of his way to single Zeke out from the other Titans, or from the other Shifters, even, to make sure that we would notice him and remember him. From his unusual appearance ( I hope it will be eventually explained why his titan looks like an ape; after all, even Pieck's Titan doesn't look nearly as animalistic as Zeke's ), to the fact that he was the first Titan Shifter that could talk, and talk clearly ( ironic, isn't it, that the most animalistic of all the Shifters would also be the only one capable of intelligent speech while in Titan form ), to his affable cruelty and the unusual level of violence and brutality that permeated his persona ( damn you, Zeke; I haven’t forgiven you for Mike  ),Isayama wanted to make very sure we wouldn't forget this new character.

So, sixty chapters after his introduction, what do we know about him and his personality? For starters, he is certainly an extremely intelligent and rational individual: in every instance he has appeared, he's always seemed to be several steps ahead of everyone else, whether it was about knowing that Annie couln't possibly be under torture as Armin had implied, to knowing exactly how to manipulate Mads Mikkelsen the Marleyan military leader to get what he wanted, the man his clearly extremely smart and calculating ( sold his parents to the Marleyans and had the sense to keep his royal blood to himself at the age of seven, anyone? ). Having blood as cold as a snake is clearly a trait he doesn't share with Eren. What he does have in common with his half brother, though, is an inquisitive nature and his endless curiosity, as his desire to know more about the Walldians' 3DMG contraption shows well. Also, the man is clearly well read, as his house overflowing with books demonstrates. The man is also clearly capable of interacting with his superiors and treading a dangerous path without a hitch, as his interactions with the Marleyans show:

He knows, and has the cold rationality to take advantage of, the best way to manipulate his superiors into doing exactly what he wants to do.

This remarkable brain, though, is accompanied by a, er, less than stellar human sensibility, let's just say:

Yeah.

But, while Mike's death was certainly the most striking example of this personality trait of Zeke's, we've had plenty of other instances to remind us that our dear (?) monkey trouble is indeed a stone-cold motherfucker if ever there was one: remember when he decided to bet Annie's safety over a brawl with Reiner? ' Cause I do:

So, I came out from my first, superficial read of the manga with a strongly negative impression of him; his cruelty and coldness were too repulsive to me to bother going past this ugly surface and try to see if there was more to his character than a plain sociopath.

However, during successive rereads, I started to notice something else: if Zeke was cold, and cruel, and calculating, he was also, oddly, playful? Childish, almost, and in many instances. I've already mentioned how he quieted his men's desire to save Annie through a mock-fight, which is certainly an, er, odd way to settle such an important matter; but we also see this in many other instances:

In this scene, Zeke refers to Annie as Annie-chan, just like he does with Pieck in the now infamous scenes from chapter 95: using -chan as a term of endearment, a big-brotherly way to refer to them; certainly odd, when talking about fellow Warriors ( and Warriors who had saved his life at that, like Pieck in Shiganshina, or who had fallen in action, like Annie ).  It sounds strangely flippant, isn't it? And in the battle of Shiganshina, we have the most striking, chilling example of this behavior to date:

For Zeke, life is made to be enjoyed; a thought remarkably similar to Carla's, in a way, who believed life had meaning in and of itself, whether you became great or not; or even to Eren's who, unlike his father, is not moved by a great past or the belief in the existence of a chosen path for a select few, but finds his motivation in the belief that life is meaningful only when it's free. And yet… immediately after these words, Zeke proceeds to show us his own brand of " enjoyment": crushing people to bits with rocks.

Is this simple sociopathy, then? The figure of the " sociopath " is, in modern literature, a bit like what the " Dark Lord " was to older stories: an incarnation of evil without depth, cruelty born and incarnate; except that modern writers are apparently too cool for the concept of " dark lord ", and prefer to rely on the rationality of psychiatry to give their cardboard villain some flair and an aura of sophistication ( yes, I’m salty  ). Is Zeke really this, though?

I propose a different interpretation of his personality, especially in light of the most recent chapters, where it has become more and more obvious that the man has plans of his own, and that the direction in which these plans will swing might end up being crucial to the resolution of the story: Zeke has, in my opinion, a remarkably developed brain and rationality, accompanied at the same time by a stunted emotional growth. Studies made during the course of the last century have shown how crucial the depth of emotion we're shown in the first months of our life is to our maturation: as has been said, a child's early emotional experiences become literally embedded in the architecture of their brains, and this development is closely tied to the social and emotional enviornment in which they live ( Hardvard university, http://developingchild.harvard.edu/wp-content/uploads/2004/04/Childrens-Emotional-Development-Is-Built-into-the-Architecture-of-Their-Brains.pdf ); in particular, several studies, including Erik Erikson's on the early developmental stages of a child, show how crucial the first few years of our lives are in the development of our emotional perception of the world: by age 5, the groundwork of our emotiona responses has been laid.

What was Zeke doing during this crucial developmental stage? While he hadn't started his Warrior Programme yet, we do know one thing about him: his parents were already trying to indoctrinate him:

Worse still, from the day he was born, he wasn't just their baby to them, but the Chosen One, the savior of the Eldian Race:

Since childhood, Zeke has never seen from his primary caretakers, his parents, any sign of consideration for his person as an independent individual: to them, he was a symbol first and foremost. And while I do believe Grisha and Dina did love their child, in their own way,  how could Zeke have learned to see others as people, and to empathize with them, if since the very first days of his life he wasn't recognized as a person either?

Now, I want to make sure you know that I'm hardly an expert in developmental psychology; and that, obviously, every child is different and reacts to the circumstances of life differently. However, I do find this pattern in Zeke's life, specifically, to be remarkable and telling: the development of his heart didn't follow that of his brain.

Could that have an impact in his future actions in the manga? Of course it could: Zeke's basic lack of emotional empathy versus his logic and observational abilities are already evident in his first interaction with his little brother, Eren, when he automatically assumed that, since they had at least one parent in common, then Eren had to have gone through the same experiences he had: the thought of his father as a human being, as someone who changes and grows, and might not make the same mistakes again, especially in a different environment, doesn't seem to have occurred to him. And in this contest, I think it is irrelevant whether he really did mean to save Eren or not: even the mere evidence that Eren was not, in fact, son of Dina ( something he must have thought, given the accounts on his ability to use the Coordinate, but that was disproved by the evidence that Eren looked nothing like her, or Grisha for that matter ) was enough to shock this normally unflappable man, because he apparently hadn't thought at all of Eren's circumstances being different from his own. In what way will this personality trait of his influence the future plot, remains to be seen; however, I do believe that it will have a crucial role in future chapters, influencing, as it does, his basic perception of reality. As a bottom line, I came out of these successive rereads convinced that Zeke is not, in fact, a cruel, evil man, but an individual incapable of emotional empathy; and yet, as someone still capable of rational empathy, someone who could see the cruelty and unfairness of the Eldians' situation in the context of the bigger picture, and decide, with his cold logic, whether it would be best for him to take advantage of this situation, or rectify the pointless strife and loss of human life they're currently in to create and environment in which life could finally be enjoyable again.

[goodguyjean]

“Honesty is a bad habit of mine”: Jean’s Honesty in Attack on Titan, Part 1

So a partial draft of this has been sitting in my documents for a few weeks now, but today feels like a relatively timely moment to post it because of two things that have happened recently: Jean’s character song “Rusty Honesty” has been released and—as @imperfecteclipse informed me!— last Sunday was apparently national honesty day! So let’s talk about Jean’s most defining trait!

Jean’s attempt to persuade Armin and Reiner to assist him in stalling the Female Titan, Chapter 23.

In an interview published with the first volume of Attack on Titan in English, Isayama states that Jean is his favorite character in the series because, “Jean comes right out and says what he’s thinking, even if it’s something you normally couldn’t say. That’s what I like about him.” However, many characters within the manga don’t find Jean’s forthrightness quite as endearing. Shadis, for instance, compares Jean’s personality to “a drawn sword, which tends to create conflict” (chapter 18) and Jean himself calls honesty his “bad habit” (chapter 15). It’s a personality trait—or perhaps we should say personality commitment—with consequences, often putting him at odds with others because his observations make them uncomfortable.

What I find fascinating about Attack on Titan is that Jean is never, at any point of the narrative, asked to totally give up this “bad habit”: instead, his honesty—which often takes the form of dissent—is presented as a potential asset, particularly to his development as a future leader within the Corps. In the early chapters, his honesty gives way to cynical defeatism and apathy, but over time he develops it into a tool of productive critique. He never quite assimilates comfortably into the Survey Corps, working instead to keep them on their toes. He reminds both the Survey Corps and the reader of the stakes involved in fighting the titans, wondering what it means to achieve “the greater good” at such high costs.  

It’s a trait that, when used to actively question the world order rather than just passively observe it, makes Jean dangerous. And I’ve decided to talk about it in two parts, because pulling it apart and looking at in depth has proven to be quite an undertaking, haha. This part will focus on Jean’s honesty in the early narrative (and what he means when he terms himself an honest man) and part two will explore how it assists his development as a leader up through the Return to Shiganshina arc.

As is the case with pretty much all of my Jean metas, this reading of his role in the series is entirely dependent on the manga. As I have argued here, the anime’s characterization of Jean is quite different, which significantly alters his role in the narrative.

More under the cut!

To my understanding, the early narrative of Attack on Titan establishes Jean as honest to almost a fault, but makes it clear that this honesty is rooted in a distrust for authority and the ways in which people in powerful use rhetoric to maintain control over the populace. One of the major roles Jean plays in the narrative, therefore, is to offer a realist perspective, one with which idealists such as Eren, Marco, Armin, and Erwin Smith must seriously contend if they want to prove themselves better than the king’s men. For Jean, the ends don’t automatically justify the means, and there are several moments where his position is held up as both viable and valuable. It is classic Isayama moral ambiguity: while sacrifices must sometimes be made, Honest Jean exists within the narrative to ask “at what cost?”

I’ve discussed “Pre-Trost Jean” quite extensively before, most notably here and here, but in this piece I want to focus exclusively on his honesty. My reading of Jean’s character before the events of Trost is that he is an observant and sharp teenager who is highly suspicious of empty rhetoric, critiquing the meaningless platitudes of the royal the government, Marco, and even Eren. Most importantly, his readings of people and situations are usually accurate. Jean’s commitment to understanding reality stands almost in defiance to Attack on Titan’s position that there are always multiple truths—perhaps to raise doubts about whether all “truths” are, indeed, equally valid.

Here are some notable moments when Jean describes his outlook.

Chapter 3. 

Chapter 3. 

Chapter 15.

“Honest” and “realist” are labels which Jean chooses for himself, but we come to trust his self-assessment over the course of the Trost arc, where we see him as both eager to get a good grasp on the situation (he follows Armin, Mikasa, Reiner, Bertolt, and Annie to check on what’s up with the Rogue Titan, for instance) and quite cautious (out of everyone, Jean is the only person who wants to leave the Rogue Titan to its fate).

Chapter 9.

I think it’s important to recognize that Jean’s preference for honesty and suspicion is a choice, one which we can actually see him making in a flashback to his cadets days, when Shadis asks him why he joined the military.

Chapter 15.

These panels mark a pause, perhaps where Jean thinks about what his answer will be. He’s already heard responses like Armin’s (”To make myself useful in the struggle for humanity’s victory, sir!”) and while he knows this answer to be “correct,” he decides to flout authority--which is asking for his service to the realm--and be honest about his motives. It’s small (and he receives a headbutt for his troubles!), but it communicates his dissent to the accepted cultural narrative for why these children serve. He’s serving because he wants a better life and a sense of security which he most likely lacks (I’m an OVA denier, sorry; it just doesn’t make sense).

(As a side note,  I think Armin’s phrasing is deliberately vague for the same reasons that Jean is overly honest--Armin, who is also suspicious of the cull, doesn’t say he will serve the king, like Marco, but that he will serve humanity. Even at this stage in the narrative, Armin and Jean have similar thoughts about their situation, but take different approaches.)

However, Shadis’ headbutt is indicative of the type of reaction Jean’s honesty usually receives. Shadis observes later that Jean is not particularly beloved among the other recruits.

Chapter 18. 

And Jean himself is hyperaware that his critiques create conflict with his comrades, as we see in a scene where he apologizes to Eren for calling him a coward. Jean admits that his intention is not to get a rise out of Eren and calls honesty his “bad habit”: he’s even willing to negotiate a truce, before Mikasa shows up.

Chapter 15.

Likewise, Jean apologizes to Armin after he takes a “joke” about insubordination (an expression of his frustration at being kept in the dark by Erwin Smith while on his first expedition outside Wall Rose) a bit too far, realizing that he’s worrying Armin.

Chapter 25.

I take these moments as proof that Jean, while sometimes confrontational and reactionary (particularly with Eren, but sometimes with Marco and Sasha as well), doesn’t particularly relish hurting other people’s feelings (although he does sometimes use very impolite language to express himself!). While he could work on tone and learn when to pick his battles, he usually has a point he’s trying to make. Ultimately, his comrades come to realize this too, with Sasha and Connie deciding to enlist in spite of the horrors of Trost because Jean refuses to try to persuade them and instead tells it to them like it is.

Chapter 21. My theory about what Jean’s body is doing in that last panel.

We also learn in these early chapters that Jean can take back (and perhaps even appreciate) what he deals out. After all, it is Marco’s somewhat tactless but overall correct assessment of Jean which spurs the latter to join the Survey Corps after Trost is nearly destroyed.

Chapter 18. Jean seems a little nonplussed but he doesn’t deny it. 

Similarly, he seems to accept Annie’s jibe in during the graduation party: 

Chapter 3. 

And he also takes Reiner’s wondering critique during their confrontation with the Female Titan.

Chapter 23.

Never denying a fair point, we learn that Jean truly understands honesty as valuable.

Given all of the above information, it seems to me that Jean’s honesty is a reaction to something, most likely a combination of the royal government’s dangerous rhetoric and the looming threat of the titans. Certainly, when we first meet Jean he has become cynical of the former and despondent about the latter, firmly believing that humanity is doomed and that the only thing he can do is fight for his own survival (which, if Jean were a real person, would imply to me that he felt like his survival was in some way threatened—presumably because he lives on the front-line and he witnessed the cull, but we may never know for sure).

Chapter 17.

Pre-Trost Jean is Jean at his least productive, showing a potential for critical assessment to rival Armin’s, but not using it in service of a larger goal. The events of Trost—the destruction of the city and the loss of Marco—force Jean to decide what really makes his life worth living. He decides that it is, in fact, his comrades and that the only thing he can do is join the Survey Corps to protect them from the titans.

However, his penchant for honesty does not disappear once he’s chosen a career path. Unable to let his suspicion of authority go, Jean turns his critique on Erwin Smith when he disagrees with Smith’s decision to withhold potentially life-saving information from his Scouts in hopes of catching out a spy.

“How many soldiers do you think died for nothing?”, Chapter 27.

Two things are important, here, I think. First, that Erwin Smith has not been honest: in fact, he has actively spread misinformation about Eren’s whereabouts in the scouting formation to confirm his suspicion that there are some humans within the military who are aiding the titans. Whether or not we as readers understand and agree with this tactical decision, Jean certainly objects. At this point in the narrative, Jean does not see Smith’s methods as significantly different from those of the Walled World’s government—while he sees the Survey Corps as his best chance at protecting his friends, he remains wary and questioning.

The second important piece of information we learn from these scenes is that Jean is still vocal about his concerns.

Chapter 25.

Not only does he question the Survey Corps, but he’s willing to do it publicly, at his own risk, setting up his eventual dissent during the Uprising arc.

So, to conclude this probably unnecessarily lengthy and speculative analysis, Jean retains his suspicion of authority and continues to risk being honest even after joining the Survey Corps. What is so fascinating about this development, and what I will explore further in the next installment of this meta, is that Jean’s frankness and sheer commitment to speaking his mind are touted as what actually makes him a great leader among the newest batch of Survey Corps recruits.

Thanks for reading!

[lichamonae]

The most beautiful smile

Ok guys, this is it, the eremika fanfic, hope you like it.

This is 4 years after reaching the ocean.

Pairing:  Eremika

Words:  4,000 ~

Rating: Very innocent <3

---------------------------

Wow, I´m tired – She smiles at the reconstructed house, while takes her sweat off her forehead. She is not a smiley person, like, at all; but when she smiles it is very special for her, it´s another level experience in her life.

She ducks to grab her garden tools left in the floor and watches her beautiful white dress *great* – It´s all dirty and wet, I need to take care of my formal clothes, I´m still not get used to be so dressed up. - She shakes off the dirt and enters to the pretty little house.

It looks very different of what it was, but she could not remember all the details. She´s very sure the kitchen counter was in the right side of the house, and the living room wasn’t that big. The walls are a little bit lighter, and the modern fashion took over in some furniture. She just couldn´t find anywhere the same jar she used to put flowers in for Mrs. Jaegar 10 years ago.

Ten years ago…

What kind of person lives everything she lived this past 10 years and still stays alive?, Nobody cares, she thought.

In her room there is a bit amount of her stuff (well, she doesn´t have much), but almost all stayed in the recluts house, even the scarf. She changes and takes off her pony tail. She looks at the mirror – I´m so different. - She can tell is not a girl anymore, like she always have been very tall and strong, always looking bigger than she was, but this was different.

Her face´s shape was more defined, her hair has been growing and growing this past years. She really didn´t care about cutting it anymore, and it was almost getting to the waist – I need to cut it now - But she really liked how it looks on her. Her figure was more delicated than before; she used to do exercises once in a while now so her muscles where less marked. She was relieved about that for some reason.

She looked just like a normal girl, but she wasn´t a normal girl.

*knock knock*

She heard the sound of the door, she wasn´t expecting anybody, but maybe is him – No, is not; maybe they sent Armin again.

-Mikasa! I know you are here, open the door. – She heard Armin's voice *exhales*

Is not that she doesn´t want to see him, she loves Armin with all her heart. But since everything was revealed, she just could not bear watching her best friends die.  And that big fight Eren and she had was too much for her to support; what she was thinking anyways? Who was her to make him change his mind?

-Hi! – She hugged him really tight that he couldn't breathe.

-Oh, *coughs* wow, hi! Stop showing off Mikasa.

-Welcome home, Armin.

She makes the dinner for him and gives him a tea while the meal is ready. Her skills in the kitchen always have been good, but she has been improving. Armin asks himself is there is something that she just couldn´t do.

-Mikasa, wow. Something like this I can't eat it where do I live, you know.

She sits down and stares at him, almost with threatening eyes – So who send you this time?, Levi? Hanji? Sasha???.

-You know Sasha cries all over the place when she misses you… this tea is so great, did Levi teaches you? – He sips his tea without looking Mikasa in the eyes.

-E… eren? It was Eren?

Armin, suddenly looks down, then looks at the ceiling and finally all the house. - You made an amazing job in here, the last time I came there was only one room and the basement; But now, it's like you've recreated the whole house ... Even built just two rooms.

Silence. Armin always was like this, he always perceives others feelings and movements and uses it against them. And he was very persuasive, this kid is dangerous.

-I think you wanna leave in the morning, so if you have something to say, say it now. – Mikasa breaks the silence; she knows what all this is about. They want her, her strength, her skills, and her will to protect Eren no matter what. But she can´t protect him anymore, she can´t protect something that is doomed. Is like they were already dead, she has already lost everything.

-Mikasa, two years ago, he didn't mean all the things he said. He didn’t mean to figth with you like he did. Of all the people around you, Eren is the one who cares the most about you. Even Jean felt sorry for him... well after he almost kills him for talking to you like that.

-“I will wrap it as many times as I need to” – Mikasa says looking in the distance, very nostalgic. Her heart starts to feel this whole again.

-That´s what he said to you right? I mean, that’s what he told me that happened that day.

Mikasa looks at Armin with surprised. Why in the world Eren would talk about that? that was very personal. They were going to die and she tried to ki…

-He told me that maybe, just maybe you tried to kiss him – Armin looked at her with embarrassment while saying those words, he was waiting to Mikasa break the table and kicking him out of the house.

Mikasa relaxed, and breathed very very deeply. *just breathe* *just pretend he didn´t said that*

- Eren and me are very important to you Mikasa, I know Sasha is very important too. If you want us to go and fight without you, I´ll understand, but I know that you won´t never do that. I told you the last time that it was probably that this war was far away, but some soldiers were informed that they are now coming here and they want us dead. They need my titan, Annie and Eren´s to win this. But if we don´t have you, if you don´t protect him, we are screwed.

-Don´t you have Levi? he is enough for all of you, he will protect him.

-Mikasa, I… told him that I will not tell you but, you deserve to know it.

Mikasa felt her cold sweat in her head and arms. She was reckless of leaving Eren on his own this past two years. He needs her, Armin needs her. The only thing Mrs. Jeager told her to do was protect Eren, and she just leave him.

-Eren is coming here, I know this is the selfishest thing in the world, but we need to recover our pride, we deserve to be free. We deserve to live in this world the years that we have left. –Armin stands up and with determination says this words to Mikasa.

She felt how Armin was so brave to say those words to her. Even two years ago, Armin could not stop her.

What happened two years ago was something she didn´t want to think about...

She had been through all stages of lost: Shock, denial, anger, despair, acceptance. This happened, one, two times now? Three, but this time she could not accept it, she couldn´t be angry, she just have to watch the only two humans she cared about just die, the only two persons who live deep in her heart.

They were preparing and developing strategies to contra attack the race who wants them dead. They even were strong enough to fight back those big metal monsters. The titans by their side were very strong, Eren and Armin were very strong. Levi and Mikasa were doing their thing too by taking over the machines and capturing people to gain information. They were two very busy years, and the odds were in their favor. The people inside the walls, the Erdians have a chance to win, to live. But Mikasa just was feeling worst and worst every passing day.

She never looked at the calendar, she stopped every person to celebrated birthdays. She just looked how Eren and Armin´s life were fading, little by little. And they were so, happy? Like if they weren´t weapons, if they weren´t used by the whole humanity inside the walls. Then she started to feel used as well.

-What are you saying, are you out of your mind? – Eren said very angry at her while Mikasa was grabbing him by his arm. This was the second time they were fighting this week, Mikasa wanted to stop him to leave to another misson.

-All that I want is to you to live, maybe you will just die sooner, sooner than your miserable life span – Mikasa was already crying quietly, but her words were very solid and demanding.

- If you don´t want to come, don´t do it, if you want to all humanity die, just wish for it. Until we don't murder them, we are not free, we are not even alive.

Eren screams were very audible tho. Jean, Sasha, Connie and other recluts were listening everything from Eren´s room while they were preparing for leaving.

-They have been fighting like 2 hours now, and Eren is just saying the same bullshit, I´m gonna end this now – Jean was going to Eren´s room but Connie stopped him.

-Don´t be ridiculous. Mikasa would murder you if you stand there, let them have this marriage moment.

-They are not marriage, you asshole, he is just a dick to her all the fucking time and he doens´t even care about her. – Jean said with venom in his mouth, he was just tired of watching her been depressed.

Eren came out of the room yelling at Mikasa and putting his uniform, while Mikasa was behind him. She tried to help him putting on his equipment, but Eren take her off.

-You are not coming – Said Eren with a salty voice

-The you are just gonna die there

-Then I will fucking die, I don´t want your protection anymore. I want to this protecting bullshit stops now.

Mikasa was still putting her scarf, like she was not listening to him, and the others in the living room look other ways, the place was very tense. Eren´s words are always very harsh, but right now he was really pissed off.

They all started to leave the house, but Eren stopped Mikasa.

-I said, you are not going.

Mikasa looked deadly at Eren´s eyes – I´m coming.

-I´m not saying not you to fight, I´m saying you are not coming because of me anymore. If I´m going to die soon I´m going to give everything for our freedom, and you are selfish enough to want me to stop; so that´s the deal.

-I´m going to take you home, where you can live your last years in peace away of all this bullshit

-What fucking house Mikasa? That house is ruinned, that life is ruined. You can´t just pretend this not existed and build a happy family.

In that moment, was the first time in all her life that she really hate him.

”I will wrap it as many times as I need to”

What a liar

-Then I will build a fucking house! –she yelled at him

All of the soldiers turned back to Eren and Mikasa. They could not tell what they just heard. That was Mikasa yelling at Eren. She yelled at him!.

Armin just could not believe. She punched him many times back then, but because he was reckless boy, but this was different.

She was very different, this was not Mikasa. She was thinking now for her, and not just for Eren.

Armin tried to stop her, but she just got in her horse and went as fast as she could. She did it so fast than her scarf fell on the floor, she didn’t even care.

----------

 -I´m a selfish person now Armin, I´m selfish too. I was expecting to Eren just come here, build the house again and try to live like normal people, but we are not normal, I´m not a normal girl.

-Mikasa, I don´t know why the three of us meet, why suddenly we ended up trying to save humanity, but it feels like we all three were destiny to be together, to save this stupid cause. We are not meant to be happy, you know? but I think that if we are together again, we are going to be happy. With the years I have left, the only think that will make me happy is being with you and Eren.

She wanted to hold her tears, be strong but she was afraid to see him again, and then she realized.

-Wait Armin, is he coming here? When is he…

Too late

The door was open, his figure was there. Shit

When she saw Armin a year ago she was shocked. He looked more mature, his factions were more rough and manly. He was so sweet looking, and thanks to that people always look down of him, for his weakness. But now, she was sure that´s not the case anymore. She even though he was a very handsome man, even with more presence than Capitan Erwin back then.

But this was different, because Eren´s eyes were the only thing she could see. His eyes were very big and green, there was a bright light on them, even if his life was fading. Those eyes were looking the whole place. The kitchen, then Mikasa, the table, Mikasa, the rooms, Mikasa. She could not look away of those eyes.

Silence again. What an awkward day.

-Mi..

-Er..

Armin watched the two jerks saying nothing. Looking at each other, mumbling their names, he wanted to laugh, but clearly was not the moment.

Armin took his tea and yawns like he was very tired. – Well, I´m going to rest in one of the rooms Mikasa, so good night both of you.

He left them alone.

Eren was still in the entrance of the house, and Mikasa was still looking at his eyes. He closed the door behind him and took a sit, Mikasa went to the kitchen.

She offered him tea and sat down again in the chair in front of him. She now was looking at some fabric in Eren´s neck. Oh

-Ah… I forgot I have it, take it. – Eren could tell that Mikasa was looking the scarf and took it off. He offered to Mikasa, but she didn´t take it so Eren left it above table

-I´m…

Eren wanted to say something, but he couldn´t. She was, so…mature now. Her hair was so long, shinny. He now understood why Jean was so impressed about Mikasa the first time he saw her.

*Is this how Jean felt the first time he saw Mikasa?* because he was maybe feeling the same, how… how beautiful” He left himself thinking that.

-I´m sorry – finally said Eren.

-I´m sorry too

- I told Armin to leave you alone, I don´t want you to come, but this all shit is going to start again, and I can´t go without talking to you.

-You, don´t want me to come? – Said Mikasa while looking down, he´s saying the same cruel things like back then.

Eren didn´t understand what she was looking so sad, and then he saw Armin in the edge of one of the room´s door doing signs to him. *abort?, what do you mean by… oh fuck*

-No, no, no, that´s not what I meant... Look at this place, you recreated this with all your effort. It is hard for me been here, in our house were everything started, where everything went to hell. But you been here, and doing this, is telling me that I have to be strong for you. Even if you don´t want to fight beside me.

Eren instantly grabbed her hand, she stopped breathing, Armin gasped behind the room´s door.

-What I came to tell you is that, I don´t want to spend the rest of my few years thinking that you are here, alone and hurt because of me. I want you to say good bye to me with a big smile, because your smiles are very rare and precious to me.

*thanks for wrapping this scarf – smiles* they were going to die, and the only thing she could do is thank him, and giving him the most beautiful and biggest smile she had.

Then she suddenly felt the warm of his hand. That hand was very different too. Was a hand of a man, she wanted to fight with him again.

If he was going to fight and die, she will do it too. She will die for him, but this time it would be different, she wasn’t have to protect him, because she felt with his hand he would protect her.

This was the first time she felt he was doing what he promised.

-I´m had plenty of time to think about what happened, and why you left. I´m not a child anymore Mikasa.

*Armin stop fucking smiling* He was trying not to watch Armin behind the door losing his shit.

-Eren... you are tired, I think we should sleep.

*what I did wrong?*

-Don´t… don´t you are going to say anything? – Eren said while grabbing her hand closer with concern.

-I need to think about it, although you said that, Armin is asking me to fight. So I need to consider that, you can sleep in my room where Armin is.

She stands, but no one stopped grabing hands. They looked in the eyes. Mikasa was holding that thought, but she could not anymore.

*Eren told me that maybe you tried to kiss him* Armin you little…

-Good night, Eren. – she finally take her hand off Eren´s and went directly to the main room. She went to bed, and remembered that her pajama was not in that room.

*Perfect, I can´t even move*

She was so embarrassed that she could not talk to Eren about anything. She coul not respond to all those beautifull words that he said to her, because she was so embarrassed. She had already decided to go when she saw how much Eren had grown mentally. She tought all this time that he had already forgot about her.

That night she slept well, because it was the last night of her normal life.

Eren and Armin had to sleep in the same bed. Armin was sleeping very peacefully, but Eren could not stop thinking.

-Armin, hey Armin. Are you sleep?

-Now I´m not, jerk.

-Did I fucked up? With her?

- I think you did just fine.

-I need more than fine, I mean, the last time I practically broke her heart.

-That’s because you´re stupid, and don´t think before opened your big mouth. And that´s why the humanity lost one of their strongest soldiers.

-Thanks Armin, I wanted to feel better, thanks really.

-What I´m saying is that even if it took you this long to came here and said those things to Mikasa, it was worth it. If she come with us, or don´t; that doesn´t matter, because it was worth it.

-I just think that I fucked up, she even didn´t grabbed her scarf... - He said while grabbing the red scarf closer to his face.

-Eren?

-Yeah?

-Don´t you think that Mikasa is the most beautiful woman you have ever seen in this world?. I mean, our world is small compared of what it really is but, I can´t imagine a girl more beautiful than her.

-Wha…..what are you saying that of all the sudden?

-All of the sudden Eren?, you almost confessed to her back there, I just thought that thinking about how she looks is more pleasant than thinking about all this mess.

Eren sighs deeply, Armin was right. He could this night be a normal guy, thinking about the beauty of a woman, he could left that happeded just for tonight.

-I bet Jean is going to loose his mind when he sees her! – Armin says while he was laughing, trying to no laugh hard for Mikasa to hear him.

-Don´t be ridiculous, he´s with that new small girl with black hair, remember?

-Oh, yeah I know, but you know that he has been always nuts about Mikasa. He can´t see you without hate in his eyes since she left.

-Armin, don´t be stupid, we don´t even know is she´s coming with us.

Armin smiled at him, he couldn´t belive how dense Eren is. He doesn´t know if he needs to push him more, but he thinks is the only choice to make this years to really worth. Maybe is not fair for Mikasa to live with that while they are dying in front of her, but they could even die in the war that is coming, so…

-Eren, are you sure she was trying to kiss you ? that day?

Eren looked at Armin with fear, he told him that never again talk about that, this guy has no limits.

-I mean, If that is true I think that now that I talked her about that moment she problably could come.

*For gods sake Armin you did not*

-I told her, sorry. I´m sure that this is selfish, but I want the three of us to fight and win. And then come here once in a while and hang out with you guys, like back then…

Armin knew for sure that Eren was freaking out, because he wasn´t even breathing, but it was the last card for him. With Mikasa they have all the cards to play that deadly game. He was satisfied with what he did, he was very happy, that was a very happy night.

Eren didn´t say anything, what who could he say? Fuck you Armin? Bad bad Armin?. These four years he has changed so much, he had became the lider they all needed, even if he has to do bad things, he will do anything to fulfill their meta, even do things like saying THAT to Mikasa.

*She is not going to come*

The next morning Eren wake up very late, he was over thinking the whole night and slept very late. He went to the bathroom to wash his face and then he remembered he was in his house.

Now that Mikasa wasn´t in front of him, been there felt so overwhelming. It was like a dream been there, in that house, thanks to her. He was so nervious to go to the living room and not seen his mom doing breakfast, or his dad reading the newspaper. He took a big breath and went there.

The breakfast was already in the table and Armin was eating very fast.

-It´s very late Eren, we have to leave asap.

She wasn´t there, sure that she just prepared breakfast and went out to not confront him. He didn´t want to confront her either.

He took his plate and eat as fast as he could, and then she came out of her room.

-I can´t belive that this still fits me, Armin do I take my  3DMG? Or you think it´s not worth it?

She was wearing the whole uniform, and Eren just felt how his heart made a big jump in his chest.

-We will give you another, the tech team have changed some things, you will do it fine with the new desing.

Eren couldn´t take his eyes out of her. It was so nostalgic, but at the same time, she looked so different. Now he understood what Armin was talking about.

-Eren, eat faster, we need to leave. –Mikasa said to him , like if the last two years haven´t happened at all.

-Ok… I´ll hurry.

They took the horses and left, but before they take a look at the house, their house.

-Thanks Mikasa, this means so much to me, the house, I mean. – Eren said to her. Mikasa was still looking at the house that took her two years to build. Maybe she wouldn´t see it again, but it doesn´t matter, because her house is where Eren and Armin are.

-Gotta get going, they are waiting for us-  Armin said and started riding the horse in direction to shinganshina´s outside door.

-Ok, hug me tight, we need to go faster.- Eren said while Mikasa was climbing the horse.

Some of her hair got stucked in her jacket and she got upset – I think is time for cutting my hair again, you know for the 3DMG.

- Don´t, It looks great on you. *oh good, why I just said that* - just… agh do a pony tail or whatever, let´s go, we will explain the strategy in the way.

-----

*See you later, Eren*

She said with her precious smile, the one it was for him with a tear in her eyes.

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