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sukirichi · 3 years ago

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reckless [06.]

With a lackadaisical playboy as your boss, being reckless wasn’t an option. But on the one time you let loose and made mistakes, your life is shattered, and now you’re playing house with your insufferable boss who is the father of your baby.

✘ content/warnings. angst, toxic characters, abandonment, pregnant sex, explicit smut, heavy drama, discussions of abortion

✘ note. i’m so sorry for the late update, i was depresso epresso but i’m feeling better now. hope you guys enjoy this update <3

✘ chapter song. dance to this by troye sivan & ari (idk how the song connects but i live for the nostalgic vibes)

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When you first arrived to Tokyo, you came with nothing but hopes, dreams, a half-empty suitcase and a few wad of bills.

Those same hopes and dreams threatened to burn with each week passing by that your situation failed to improve. Hopping from one part time job to another such as waitressing or wiping sweat away consecutively while manning the barbecue shops in the outskirts of the city, the saltiness of your tears remained as a permanent meal. They were hellish days spent muffling your cries behind a fist as your landlord kicked you out for what seemed like the third time in the span of six months for not being able to pay rent. Blood might as well have been shed from how much you slaved to make ends meet, watching with envious eyes as luxurious cars and carefree people born with a silver spoon in their mouths drove around the night life.

Several of the pennies you’d saved for extra cash were thrown into a fountain, hands clasped as you desperately wished to become like the people you worked for.

But you found it funny that now, people bowed before you, their lips sealed shut as you sat stiffly in a table in the company of the most powerful and influential people in the room – people who you were supposed to call your family.

The power and tension brimming on the table made you clutch down on your dress, nails digging into the pads of your thigh. Beside you sat your father who hadn’t stopped shaking his leg ever since all of you were pulled out from the party by Noritoshi Kamo himself. He was as regal as he was in his Forbes covers, his handsome face kept more private in comparison to his wife voraciously plastered all over the city. Nevertheless, his presence was just as unnerving, his back kept straight and a peek of a golden band on his wrist as he leaned forwards, blue eyes narrowed and sharp with authority. “Now that all of you are gathered here,” he acknowledged each and every person in the room, barely stifling a sigh before sliding a piece of paper under his fingertips. “I believe we can now discuss the turnabouts of this said event. We must handle this by ourselves before the media gets a hold of this and things spiral out of control,” turning to his flustered wife, Noritoshi pulled her back to focus with just one pointed look. “Valeria, are you sure no one heard you?”

Valeria scoffed, “I kept everything a secret from you for twenty four years. The last thing you should worry about is anyone else finding out about this,” glaring at you, Valeria leant back in her seat. “I hid this for the rest of my life; I’ll do it again if need be.”

“Are you saying you don’t accept your own daughter?”

“I never did.”

“Well, I do,” he announced, “From now, Y/N is part of our family—”

“No,” it was your father who protested, taking everyone by surprise as he slammed his palms down on the mahogany table. The impact was heard loud and clear that from the corner of your eye, you noticed a few servants jumping a little in their spot. “With all due respect, she is my daughter. I raised her, not you. You can’t take my daughter away from me like this and expect me to watch as she shares meals with you like her own mother didn’t abandon her in the first place. Y/N isn’t going anywhere. She has her own life to live and that’s not with you.”

With the growing tension in the room, accompanied by Noritoshi being unfazed as he stroked his chin, Mrs. Gojo brought it upon herself to chuckle awkwardly to cut it back. “Noritoshi, darling, the Gojos can take care of her—”

“The Gojo’s do not accept Y/N either,” Satoru declared, refusing to look you in the eye as he continued. After everything he said and did, his words barely stung you anymore, but it didn’t alleviate the shame any less; the burdening fact that you were unwanted by everyone pushing down harder and harder on you. “She is not part of our family and she never will be. Her sudden increase in status doesn’t change a thing over my decision that the Gojo’s will no longer affiliate themselves with her.”

“Satoru,” his mother whisper hissed, tugging at his expensive sleeves. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“As the proper and rightful heir, future chairman of the Gojo Group, I’m the one who gets to decide on our connections and relationships,” he said, giving back the exact same sharpness from their crystallized eyes. “Isn’t that what you wanted, dear mother? For me to take responsibility?”

Valeria clicked her tongue, “She shouldn’t even be here. It’s about time she went back where she came from and live quietly as if this never happened at all—”

“I’m not going anywhere,” you finally spoke up, a sardonic smile painting on your lips. Everyone’s heads snapped your way as you raised a brow at them, clearly not having expected you to speak when you’d been mum the entire ordeal. “You’re all talking about my life as if it’s something that’s in your control. Mother, father – I don’t care where you both want me to go because I’m staying. This is my world. This is where I belong, and I’ll rightfully claim what is truly mine but deprived of me.”

Valeria’s laugh echoed around the room. “Y/N, don’t be delusional. You being my biological daughter doesn’t mean anything because I left you, I didn’t want you and you have no place in my company. Do you understand?”

“Who said I wanted to work for you?” you retorted back, nodding your head in the direction of her husband who sipped his wine ruefully. From the other end of the table, Mrs. Gojo shut her eyes tight and Satoru opted to keep his gaze outside the windows, his face undeniably pale. You couldn’t understand why they had to be here, but it no longer concerned you when they made it clear they had no need for your involvement with them. “Your husband runs his own business. Step-daughter or not, I believe it’s within my rights to choose who I want to work for.”

“You fucking leech,” she spat out, pushing her chair back as she pointed to her husband. “You’d dare vie for Kamo Enterprises?”

“Scared I’ll do better than you, Mother?”

“The fucking audacity of you to show your face around here—”

“Valeria, sit down,” Noritoshi grabbed his wife’s forearm, the latter freezing the next instant. Like a charm wrapping around her, Valeria huffed before taking her seat, though the heat in her eyes didn’t extinguished one bit. “Y/N, you don’t have to work for me. As my wife’s biological daughter that she’d refuse to take responsibility for, I’ll take care of you as a parental figure in her behalf. You can visit your office when you’re ready and the keys for your new penthouse will be provided by your lawyer, Mr. Naoya Zen’in. I will also issue a bodyguard for you to ensure your safety at all times. However, in exchange of all the privileges we would grant you with, I only request that we keep this news hidden from everyone until Y/N gives birth. This might be too much for her and we wouldn’t want to harm the baby by stressing her out. The last thing we want is to have a miscarriage,” cold, blue eyes sweeping over the table, Noritoshi pursed his lips. “Any objections?”

“Noritoshi, why are you doing this?”

“I am your better half for several reasons, Valeria,” he supplied, the two of them lost in their own worlds; the same world you’d soon be thrown in. “The things you refuse to do out of your corrupted heart all befall under my wing. Now, apologize to your daughter.”

You never got your apology.

But you didn’t need it. You now had power right on your fingertips; power strong enough to wield that even your own mother had a sliver of fear passing through her eyes as you smirked.

This was what you wanted. The power, the status – it didn’t matter that you didn’t work hard for it. None of it mattered as you made your way to your new penthouse, golden chandeliers spiraling from the ceilings and the entire complex dripping beige with warm earth tones. It shouldn’t matter now that you had everything you asked for. You should be happy, should be celebrating; one look at your closet filled with dresses and clothing, that you never could’ve afforded even while working your whole life with the Gojo Group, is enough of a celebratory factor already.

Your queen sized bed with silken sheets practically hugged you warmly as you sank down on it, the entirety of Tokyo on display from your glass windows at the palm of your hands. Tokyo was at your mercy.

Reminding yourself again and again that you were born for this, you were made for this, it barely soothed you.

The penthouse was too spacious for you alone.

The bed was much too large for a single occupant.

And the larger the walls loomed, the hollow emptiness within you echoed back further. None of it made sense as you sank down into your bed, fists balled into your chest as you curled up to your side as tears crawled down your face. Why were you crying? You wanted this. This was your dream. Anywhere but returning to your small house back in the countryside where you shared a room with your brothers who got bigger beds and a proper closet while you received hand-me-downs from your step-mom was a hundred times better. You weren’t part of them. You were rich, powerful, influential – you could have everything in the snap of your fingers; the amount of people waiting on standby from a single phone call from you said enough of that.

But why did it feel so lonely, that the bigger you made it in life, the smaller you felt inside?

The longer you thought about it, you could only picture one person who’d lived the exact same way his entire life. Showered in money and luxuries, traveling the world whenever he pleased and drinking the finest champagne as if it was water – Satoru grew up with the brand of emptiness etched deep within his heart.

With the amount of work thrown your way the moment you assumed office as executive in your stepfather’s company, you could barely find any comfort in this new life you were granted with. Nights were spent dozing off in your desk to finish paperwork and approving proposals, while days were filled with meetings and coffee dates between new associates. You worked so much that you almost forgot what your penthouse looked like anymore, only to pass out in your bed as soon as you got home.

Sleep wasn’t that comfortable either even with the layers of soft padding. In your head, your mind burned with the amount of work you needed to be done, and you woke up at six on the dot, always three minutes earlier than the alarm.

Your body begged for rest from the exhaustion of work combined with pregnancy, your breasts growing sore and hips filling out to accommodate the new weight. One glance at your alarm told you that you would be late for work if you didn’t stand up now, but your limbs felt heavy, eyes fluttering shut against your will. You only stood up to waddle to the bathroom at your need to pee, waddling back into the kitchen for a glass of water as you inserted your arms into a silk nightgown when you saw a tall, blond man expertly spinning a pen between his fingers.

“Naoya?” you demanded, tying your robes around your waist to provide some modesty in your body. The said lawyer spun from his chair as he flashed you a handsome smile; his rugged look of piercings and two-toned hair pairing perfectly with his rather pressed suit and elegance he carried like drapery. “What’re you doing here?”

“Pardon my intrusion, Miss. You told me last time I could use the spare key,” he nodded politely, shooting up on his feet as he fetched a glass of water for you. Muttering thanks under your breath, you sat across him, blinking at the leather brown attaché case pressed to his hip. For the past two weeks that you got accommodated to your new lifestyle, Naoya had become an active figure in helping you fit in, oftentimes more of an acquaintance than a mere lawyer paid by your step-father. “Have you slept well? You look really tired and the doctor advised you get lots of rest now that you’re on your early second trimester.”

“Could barely sleep,” you admitted, aware of the fatigue lined under your eyes.

“Is the penthouse not to your liking?”

“It is; it’s comfortable. Just too…large when it’s just me and my baby,” you shrugged, changing the subject as Naoya looked around your place with much interest. “What brings you here? I don’t remember scheduling an appointment with you.”

“Oh, about that,” he mused, “Your stepfather told me to come here. He has a message to tell you, but he’s gone for a business trip so I’ll be the one relaying,” sliding forwards with you a folder he pulled from his case, Naoya offered his fountain pen, the initials M & N carved into it. “Here are the papers you need to sign to accept your inheritance from Kamo Enterprises. Though neither of you are bound by blood nor law due to Mrs. Valeria refusing to share anything with you, Mr. Kamo insists that you may share the assets as long as you do your job well. He was quite pleased with your performance in his company while he’s away. Mr. Kamo has received nothing but phone calls of praise over his new executive.”

“Thank you.”

Naoya nodded with a small smile, “As pleased as he is with your abilities, however, he’s requested that you take your maternal leave in the next two months. If it isn’t obvious already, Mr. Kamo values the child you bear. Grandchild to Rang Corporation by blood and Kamo Enterprises by affiliation, and direct heir to the Gojo Group… that child, is the future of everything.”

Your hand hovered over the pen stiffly, “You’re viewing my baby as an asset?”

“Don’t take it personally, Ms. Y/N,” he brushed off with a chuckle, “Just as marriage is a formality of mergers and acquisitions since business is first before families, having children is also another formality of ensuring the company’s future. And as you know already, Mr. Kamo is unable to have children with Mrs. Rang. He needs you and your child to take care of his empire once he’s gone.”

You’d heard before that Valeria refused to start a family with Noritoshi, declaring over and over that she had a career to flourish and both of them were much too occupied with managing their businesses to ever think about it. Unsurprisingly, Noritoshi never questioned his wife, but now the burden of bearing a child into this conglomerate world rested upon your shoulders.

It left a bitter taste in your tongue as you signed the papers after reading them, attempting to mask the malice dripping from your voice at the fact of being viewed valuable only as a woman capable of bringing an heir. “Does Mr. Kamo trust people this easily?”

“He is a great judge of character,” Naoya said, smiling to himself as he read over the papers and hums with satisfaction before securing it into his folder. As if sensing your wariness, Naoya offered a squeeze of your hand you supposed was meant to be reassuring. “You fit into this world perfectly, Ms. Y/N. One look from you and I can tell you were born with power and grace in your blood. I’d say you were made just to fit this role.”

You snickered humorously. “I don’t know where you think your flattering will get you, Mr. Naoya, but it doesn’t work on me.”

“I’m only doing my job, Miss.”

Laughing along with him, you grew serious with an impending thought. Naoya was one of those people you’d been subconsciously leaning for help, even shared a few meals with him here and there to discuss inheritance issues. You’d learn he was part of the law firm working for Kamo Enterprises, but he dreamt of having his own firm someday, a goal you casually told him you’d help make come true. It stunned you at first at how easily the words slipped past your lips, the ability to push someone towards the direction they wished to be veered in something within your reach. Deep down, you knew you enjoyed Naoya’s company not because he was funny and friendly, but rather he offered a sense of placement missing in your life.

“Naoya,” you licked your lips, fingers feathering over your glass, “May I ask you to do something for me?”

“Anything, Miss, what is it?”

“It’s about Gojo Satoru,” you answered, peering up at him curiously under your lashes. Naoya visibly straightened up at the mention of your rival business; Kamo Enterprises were never on good terms with the Gojo Group. The collaboration project between Lapis Lazuli and the Gojo’s fashion department were tense enough to begin with; this baby blooming inside your body the only hope of ever alleviating previous qualms that happened between the two families. Until now, where Noritoshi has showed his support out of obligation as a ‘parent’, not once had he acknowledged Satoru as the father of your child openly if not for Satoru’s power. “There’s something I’d like to know about his past.”

Naoya bit the inside of his cheeks, contemplating right before you. “I’m an old acquaintance of Satoru, actually, we were childhood friends until he went to business school, and me in law. We haven’t been talking much due to our careers, but I do know someone who you can reach out to,” he informed, leaning forwards to mumble, “Sir Gojo is avoiding you, isn’t he?”

“We parted ways,” you cautioned, “I think…”

“Suguru is always within reach. If I’m not mistaken, he’s in the studio right now with your mother,” Naoya clicked his tongue in confirmation as he checked the schedules for Lapis Lazuli; one of the perks of being the company lawyer. At his words, you stood up and prepared yourself a hearty breakfast of fruits and cereal, ignoring Naoya’s restrained amusement from your eagerness to eat, all traces of past exhaustion disappearing from your face. As much as you hated to admit it, Satoru stayed as a constant ghost whispering at the back of your head. His last words from the dinner with Noritoshi, where he declared his firmness in not wanting you nor the baby, didn’t feel right.

You worked for him long enough to know when he was hiding something or not.

“Oh, and Miss Y/N?” Naoya called out before bidding goodbye, “If I may say so myself…Satoru is a good person. That much I can assure you. Please give him a second chance. Satoru’s not the type of person to do things for no reason.”

“I know, Naoya,” you smiled bitterly, “I know that better than anyone else.”

Satoru…where are you?

“Kamo Prestige Mall aims to cater for upper-class people in the district shopping centre of Tokyo. Homing over two hundred designer brands in a sleek, modern design proposed by our partner, the Yamamotos, the mall is planned to be the top prestige mall in the entire country within the year, and to make it to the top five in South East Asia for the next five years,” Chan, the acting CEO chosen by Noritoshi himself, stood before the entire presiding officials of Kamo Enterprises. “According to the finance team’s background analysis with a liability of 88 million and 2.3 billion, the ratio should be 29.30% as per—”

“26.19 to one,” you corrected without glancing up from your tablet, the room falling silent at your statement. Sighing, you shut your tablet off as you faced the shock reflecting from their faces. “That is the exact ratio. Who headed and approved this analysis?”

“Mrs. Rang, Executive Y/N.”

“Mrs. Rang is not directly involved with the Chairman’s business. They are from two different businesses as Mrs. Rang works mostly in the fashion department; creatively rather than critically,” you proclaimed, tapping one finger against the cream colored wood. It had only been two weeks since Noritoshi left you with the responsibility to be his acting executive; two whole weeks of spending day and night in your office as you buried yourself in the new workload. Two whole weeks since you’d left and packed up the rest of your possessions left behind in the Gojo Group; two whole weeks since you’d last caught a glimpse of a certain white haired man who disappeared into thin air. “Lapis Lazuli and Kamo Enterprises have formed an acquisition, correct?”

Chan nodded, licking her lips nervously. She was a great CEO and had innovative vision, but sometimes her softness bit back against her in the harshness of the corporate world. “Kamo Enterprises bought Rang Department Store over six months ago when it failed under Mrs. Rang’s management. Our company is now under control of it and piloting the latest proposals over it.”

“Are we renovating?”

“Yes, Miss, that’s the plan—”

You shook your head. “Throw the whole plan away. We’ll build Kamo Prestige Mall from the bottom up and use the former Rang Department Store into something else. Have the lead project team send me proposals by the end of this month so I can look into it.”

Everyone around you gasped. On your left, the resident manager tapped his mic to get your attention, his eyes wide with defeat and panic. “But Miss, the sales—”

“We’ll lower the liabilities. The Rang Department store is located in a spot that is more accessible by the common folk. We should relocate the Kamo Prestige Mall somewhere along the upstate to target our main audience much more intentionally,” pressing a button on the remote beside you, the screen turned black, sending the team into chaos that you’d really abandon everything they planned. Their protests didn’t go unheard as you gnawed on your lip, turning to them with a dead, bored gaze.

“Chairman Kamo has already approved this proposal, Miss, we were supposed to start in the next three months. Starting from scratch would take at least a year or more to come up with a proper plan.”

“Time is of no matter,” you shrugged, “I am your executive for a reason; I’m here to office the latest plans of Kamo Enterprises and manage our connections with the Rang Corporate. Marriage is just another formality of this acquisition and I’ve already consulted with the legal team on this,” as they opened their mouths for another round of comments, you stood, your Louis Vuitton Crocodile Capucines bag hiding your growing baby bump while your personal assistant followed behind you in hurried steps. “Lily, I want you to gather three of the best employees from each department to form my own team to help me supervise this. Schedule me a meeting next week with the shareholders and chairman himself for the leveraged buyout,” you announced, pausing at the door to face the flabbergasted officers of Kamo Enterprises – all soon to be people under your control. “Meeting dismissed. Thank you for your time.”

“Ma’am,” Lily trailed behind you, “Shall we go to Lapis Lazuli now? I’ve cancelled the rest of today’s schedules to make time for Mr. Suguru.”

Much to your PA’s worried pleads, you rushed inside the building anyway, flashing the guards your ID card before pressing the button for the fifteenth floor where Naoya said Geto would be. The latter slowly dropped his camera upon seeing you barge in, hair flying everywhere and eyes wide with desperation. Thankfully, Valeria was nowhere to be seen, and Geto quickly excused himself before guiding you somewhere private by the arm.

“Y/N,” he greeted, “Satoru…he’s not here.”

“I know that much, but Geto,” you gripped his arm, standing on your tippy toes at the same time you urged him to come closer. Geto had brought you to the stairwell where you both had enough privacy to discuss things, but your hands were jittery, eagerly clutched on the sleeves of his leather coat the harder you pictured Satoru’s empty gaze. “Wh-what happened to Satoru? I know something is wrong and he wouldn’t say that. You know something, do you? You need to tell me. What if he needs my help?”

“You’re worried about him even after everything he’s said?”

“He didn’t mean it,” you argued, “I heard from his new secretary he hasn’t left his office for days. The staff in his home hasn’t heard from him either.”

“Do you really want to know?” he asked one more time, eyes growing dark with hesitance. Nodding eagerly, Geto sighed at you before running his hands through his hair. You forgot how long you stood there or how frozen your hands had been as each word that left his lips caused something within you to crack – in anger, in hate, in guilt – and the back of your head throbbed with pressure even as Suguru left.

Parting ways, you trudged down the silver hallways of Valeria’s building, still in awe that the magnificence of her office would soon be yours. Though right now, inheritance and greed were the last thing that crossed your mind as you spotted your mother walking in with her team behind her, gaily chatting with them until her gaze landed on you. Her reaction was instantaneous; her award winning smile dropped as her heels clacked against the white marble tiles, nails sinking down into your arm before she shoved you in the closest empty room.

She was just like her.

Valeria and Satoru’s mother – they were all the same.

“What do you think you’re doing here?” she hissed, “You’re already executive in my husband’s company, what else could you want from us? And showing up in my work of all places?” surveying you up and down as expensive designer clothes were made to hide your form but hint your womanly silhouette anyway, distaste sparked in her eyes, probably thinking to herself that you never would’ve been who you are now without her. Disgust was a better way to name it. “You really are shameless.”

You gritted your teeth. “What have I ever done to you to make you hate this much? Why didn’t you look for me? Did you not thought about me; not even once?” What have we children done for our parents to curse us this horribly?

Valeria scoffed in disbelief, placing a hand on her hips. “You’re asking me that now? I never wanted you.”

“Then why keep me? You could’ve just gotten rid of me instead of bringing me into this world where I knew nothing but hell. You don’t have the slightest idea on what it feels like growing up in a loveless home—”

“I don’t know that?” she repeated rhetorically, chuckling in a sardonic manner as she flipped her hair over her shoulder. “You think I don’t know that?” Valeria repeated once more, the smile she wore now replaced with a scowl. “You want an answer? Fine. Here’s your answer. You were a mistake, one that I regret until now. I was young and stupid, okay? I wanted my parents’ attention instead of them sending me gift cards through their secretaries and coming home only for work, but the rest of my life? They were never there. It was work this, work that, Valeria you need to be this and be that. So I rebelled. I went against the man they betrothed me with on my birth and dated whoever I wanted, hung out with crowds they told me to avoid, and I did bad things. I got drunk. I did drugs. I slept with a young part-time bell boy in the hotels our family owned and got pregnant because I didn’t know what I was doing,” she huffed in one breath, eyes zeroing in your baby bump as if it reminded her of a memory she’d rather not recall. “You would’ve ruined my life if I didn’t get rid of you.”

“You didn’t get rid of me,” you glowered, “You left me.”

“I was young!” Valeria shrieked, her cries tainting the empty gray walls, “I-I was barely eighteen and I was desperate for attention. My friends wouldn’t have even talked to me if I didn’t invite them to Coachella, and my boyfriend then would’ve never looked my way if I didn’t promise he could be a model someday,” she began to cry, her mascara staining down her face until she fell down in a seat, hands trembling above a table. “Life was hard for me, Y/N. I didn’t have a choice; I didn’t want to kill my own child, especially not when your father was so sweet and stayed with me the whole time. Call me stupid but I found comfort in his arms. For the first time in my life, I felt loved and looked forward to having a family,” with shuddered breaths, Valeria turned your way. “But then you were born and you were…you were so small and real and you were crying and I couldn’t look at you. I couldn’t look at you. You disgusted me. If my parents found out I’d been a teen mom, I would be disowned. You would ruin my life.”

You recoiled, remembering that Satoru said the exact same thing. “That wasn’t my fault,” you breathed out, “You can’t hate me for something I never had control of in the first place.”

“You won’t change my mind, Y/N. I still wish I never had you.”

“You’re so heartless, mother,” you took a step back, hands protectively hovering over your belly. “It would’ve been better if you just got rid of me if you think I’d ruin your life from the beginning. It was a much better option than being the way I am now.”

“Your father loves you; isn’t that enough? Why are you asking so much for me?”

“I just want to know what I ever did to be so undeserving of love,” you sobbed, tears springing from your eyes. What was it about you that everyone claimed you were unworthy of even the smallest bit of care and affection? If no one could provide that to you, then what was the purpose of your birth? Everyone’s life would’ve been a thousand times better if they didn’t bring a nuisance like you in this world to begin with – your father included. “Dad loves his family more than I did. None of you ever cared for me.”

“And I never will,” she deadpanned, her statement landing a final blow in your already shattered ego. “Don’t ever come back here, Y/N. I don’t accept you as my child. Please. My life is good now. I’m happily married, my parents are retired and I’m the happiest I could ever be now. You didn’t have to show up and take that away from me.”

You smiled sardonically. “You know what hurts more, mother?”

“I am not your mother.”

“It was the fact that I actually looked up to you,” you confessed, the grip on your bag loosening. “For years, I admired your strength and talent. You were my idol for as long as I could remember. When I met you, I wished I could be you, but now that you’re standing right here in front of me, I realize you and I are not that different,” you lamented, shaking your head as guilt crept up on your shoulders. “I’m not any better than you. Like mother, like daughter – I don’t want to abort this baby either simply out of guilt, even if I know I don’t really want it. But you know what? You’ll still be my role model into someone who I shouldn’t be. I will never be like you.”

“Y/N,” Valeria scoffed, “I don’t care what you say.”

“I know, mother, I know,” you gave in, wiping your tears away because crying only made you feel pathetic. Her, of all people? Why would you waste your tears on someone who never wanted you? You must’ve really hit rock bottom. “You’ve made it clear you really don’t want me and I know that already. I understand.”

“Then why are you still here?”

“Because my whole life, I missed you,” your bottom lip quivered, “I hoped to meet you or know at least a little something about you. But I understand now. I’m your mistake.”

“You are,” she clenched her teeth, slamming the doors open as she dragged you both out of it. Her team was now gone and Lily was not in sight, leaving you both in the middle of the empty halls that would echo with your conflict. As if realizing she’d cause a scene, Valeria pinched the bridge of her nose as she shut her eyes. “Now go. I have better things to do.”

So did you. “This isn’t the end, mother,” you warned, wringing your arm away from her deadly grip. “I’m just starting. I wouldn’t be too comfortable and proud if I were you.”

“Are you threatening me?” she ensued with a raised brow, “Because whatever you think you’re doing, I can do so much worse.”

“Why, are you scared?” you sneered, aware that you were playing with fire. Triggered by your taunts, Valeria raised her palm to slap you, but you caught her wrist before her touch landed on your skin. Your body had never felt this hot as you burned with rage, and all it took was one light shove before your mother staggered backwards. Weak; I will never be like you. “Touch me again and I’ll drag you down the hallways by your expensive suit. Or worse, I’ll present myself to my grandparents and take back everything that’s mine. Your company. Your money. Your power. My inheritance. Everything that you deprived me of,” you jabbed a finger in her chest, lips smoothing down her hair to snarl in her ear, “I’m your biggest mistake, you said? I am not. I’ll be your worst nightmare.”

Valeria froze in her spot. With a smirk, you retreated away from her and into the elevators.

“You are nothing!” she bellowed behind you, completely unhinged as her screams bounced off the halls. “You are nothing without me! You can’t hide forever behind my husband’s back! He can’t protect you from everything!”

“Watch me,” you mouthed, the image of your mother’s despair the last thing you saw before the doors slid shut. Fists clenching beside you as your own reflection stared back at you in the silver doors, you felt the creep of insanity and hunger for more settle in your bones. If there was one thing you got from your mother, at least, it would be the craving to always come out on top as the strongest predator. “I’ll tear everything you hold precious apart right in front of your eyes.”

Coming to terms with the realization you no longer wanted to carry your baby any longer was no easy feat. For the rest of the time you’d been left alone in your penthouse with not a living soul around, you had no one but your baby as company. It was hard to accept at first that you would now be a mother – your breasts had grown sore and sensitive, the curves and dips in your body filling out as you carried the power of bearing a child – all of it went through your head with blinded rage that you often forgot this world wasn’t about you anymore.

Every morning before you showered, you’d spend minutes noting how your body changed with Gojo’s child, the ghost of his lips and his hands on yours still a painful memory.

You loved your child. You know you did, but each time your reflection mirrored back at you, nothing but terror chilled your bones. Just thinking about how you might be the same as your mother and ruin your own child’s life… it made you want to break all the porcelain from your pantry. There was so much anger and hatred boiling within you that not even this child could soften, and you couldn’t handle hurting someone like that.

You didn’t want to be like your mother.

But this child was not just yours. Your baby had a father who loved them at one point, and no matter how much his words had enough power to make you hold back, Satoru deserved to know. He’d been absent ever since that day that you really debated whether telling him about your plans to abort the baby would be a good idea or not, did he even care was what you tried to reason yourself with, but you stood outside his office anyway, back leaning against the black exterior of your Aston Martin Vantage.

The Gojo Group loomed over you in a nostalgic manner; so much so that you could picture a younger version of yourself running inside in your heels because the subway had been packed and you ran late. Meanwhile, your boss slithered inside with a Cheshire grin as he greeted everyone a good morning, mock saluting his employees playfully to settle the mood.

However, the man who stepped out of the front doors was an image far from the one you’d known for a good fraction of your life.

Satoru’s white hair was tousled and brushed back as if he’d combed his fingers through them way too many times, his brows knotted together and one of his arms holding a folded black coat. He sighed with his gaze directed on the ground, strong arms loosening the tie around his neck while the fabric of his white shirt flexed across his chest in resistance to the movement. You bit back a snicker; he still looked like a mess without you, one side of his shirt deliberately untucked.

Turned out that your snicker hadn’t been so inaudible as Satoru paused in his tracks, cerulean eyes trailing from your heels to the swell of your breasts before he found your eyes. You expected him to say anything, everything, but instead he blurted out: “You look great.”

Heat crept up to your neck against your will; irritated that your body responded to him just as easily as it did before. “I wish I could say the same about you,” you managed after a minute passed that you both soaked in each other’s presence, somewhat still perplexed that you were now standing before the other after not seeing each other – not even a text – for weeks. Your heart thrummed inside your chest as your body yearned to feel his touch, to absorb the warmth he always provided, but you were much too stubborn to move an inch away from your car.

Eventually, your longing still got the best of you as you stepped forward, voice surprisingly soft as you caressed his sharp jaw; as if nothing had ever happened between both of you and you were two lovers who simply missed each other. In a way, it felt like that, but you knew you were anything but his actual lover. You merely carried the product of his love.

“You haven’t been sleeping well. What’s on your mind?”

“It doesn’t concern you.”

“I think it does,” you defended, brushing a thumb under the sunken pads of his cheeks. “Stop lying to me, Satoru. I’m not here to play games.”

“Then what are you here for?” he grabbed your wrist and stared down at you, his jaw uncomfortably clenched tight. “Haven’t I made myself clear that I don’t want you anywhere near me? I told you already, the baby didn’t happen—”

“I’m aborting the baby, Satoru,” you blurted out, rendering the man before you silent. Satoru blinked mutely before he let go of your hand, your arms falling limp beside you as it mimicked the emptiness you would feel in a matter of days. “I don’t want to ruin their life. That’s what I came here to tell you and I’m not planning to change my mind. That’s all,” spinning on your heel, you gave him a meek nod as your hand reached out to grab the car door. Your reflex reaction was to drive back home and leave immediately; knowing that if you stayed a little longer, he could sway you one more time. “Rest well. You and I both have companies to run.”

Satoru growled and pulled you back before him, your chest colliding with his until you placed your palms on his body to steady you both. His large hands absentmindedly gripped your hips as he glowered down at you, harsh silver narrowed into slits. “You think you can just leave after telling me that?”

“You think you can expect me to stay after everything you’ve said to me?” you bit back, pushing him away to gain distance before you. His touch itself set your body on fire, and it didn’t help that your pregnancy hormones screamed at you to rip him apart already; torn between destroying him and letting him destroy you. “We’re both liars. Don’t go up on your mighty high horse and act like you’re any better than me. This is my life now and I’m getting rid of everything that ties me to you. I’ll set us both free like you wanted me to do.”

“I never wanted you to go.”

“What?” you scowled, “I’m so fucking sick of you. Every time, you do this. You never make any sense and I’m fed up with your lies. I’m tired of everyone thinking I’m just a bargaining chip or that I’m only valuable because our baby came from powerful connections. Haven’t you ever thought about how our child would grow up in our world? Unloved, unattended, showered with gifts and luxuries but never with their parents’ love. Is that really a life worth living?” you motioned to the both of you, “I don’t want our baby to end up like us.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Oh, Satoru, I know myself better than anyone and I’m pretty fucking sure being a loving mother isn’t something I’m capable of right now. I have a company to run, a family to support, something to prove and a mother to show what I’m capable of—”

“Why is it always about that?” he interjected, running a hand through his hair as his chest heaved up and down. “Why are you so damn desperate to show the world you’re great at something? None of us asked you to be the greatest boss alive. You’re fine the way you are now—”

Your vision burned red.

“That is exactly why you fail!” you jabbed a finger in his chest, gesturing to all the riches around you. “You could have so much but you’re never ambitious and you’re so satisfied with the way you are now! At this rate, you’re never getting anywhere because you have no dreams of your own, and even if you do have them, you’re too much of a coward to chase them in fear of your mother!”

“You don’t know anything about me!”

“Then let me in,” you cried out, the first to step back for the first time. Satoru’s eyes widened when he saw tears streaming down on your face and you crumbled, stepping closer to him against your previous convictions. You hated how weak you felt in that moment, but you no longer wanted to lie to yourself. It had been horribly lonely without him beside you and you didn’t want him to go, not when you were beginning to feel something more than respect for him. Head resting on his chest, you crumpled his shirt with his fist. “I-I’m scared – I don’t want to be alone so stop pushing me away and trying to hurt me under a pathetic excuse you want to keep me safe. I don’t need your protection, Satoru, I’m more powerful than you are right now. I just want you to stay.”

"I could be a monster for all you know,” his voice broke as his head fell on top of yours, arms wrapping around your shoulders. “And I might hurt you.”

“You won’t.”

“How are you so sure?”

“I know everything about what happened before,” you mumbled through his shirt, feeling his heart quicken under your touch. “That accident was none of your fault.”

How long has it been since you’ve been touched this way? Satoru hadn’t left his lips away from your skin at least once, his hands fumbling down your damp underwear as you both stumbled into your penthouse. How he managed to drive here when you couldn’t keep your hands to yourself and he came right at your hands until your seats were stained, you’d never know. The primal need to relieve tension clouded your minds as you clumsily fell on top of the cream couch, eager hands unbuttoning his shirt one by one as you grinded down on his cock. Satoru’s chest was flushed red as you helped him shrug off his shirt, your teeth grazing down from his neck to his nipples until he trembled beneath you.

“You’ve changed,” he rasped, groaning once your hands fumbled for his pants and pulled his cock out again, his boxers stained with his own cum wetting the front. “No…you’re exactly the same way you are. You’re just as greedy as before.”

“Greedy? I think you mean ambitious, Satoru.”

Discarding your dress over your head, you were left in your lingerie, stomach curved with his baby. Satoru bit his lip at the sight of you losing yourself before him, nails scraping down his shoulder as you rotated your hips back and forth on his cock, teasing just enough for his member to slide past within your warm lips. “You’re going to be the fucking death of me,” he pulled you down for a kiss, using one hand to detach your bra until the lacy black material was flung above a lamp. His hands kneaded your sore breasts, making you whimper and tip over at the sensitivity. “One day, you’re going to burn the whole world down and take me with it.”

You shook your head in denial, “I won’t hurt you.”

“But I have,” he gritted his teeth, gripping you gently by the hips while you made yourself comfortable above him. Satoru guided you into using his shoulders as leverage before two of his fingers slid inside your wet heat, the digits curling and prodding to get a feel for what spot made you mewl or not. “Pretend all you want, but I see the rage in your eyes. You’ve not forgiven me, and I won’t apologize either. The last thing I want is your pity.”

“I’m going to kill your mom.”

“That’s not the most romantic thing to say,” he joked, adding his thumb into the tantalizing mix to rub your swollen clit.

“You’re still hard anyway,” you scoffed, dropping your head onto his shoulder as you palmed him. Satoru hummed as his lips left love bites all over your neck and collarbones, possessive as he marked you in visible places. The need for pleasure was more important than getting the other to come undone and you licked a flat stripe from his neck to his jaw as you pumped his cock, his hips snapping upwards to fuck himself into your fist. “I won’t forgive you…but maybe I don’t hate you so much.”

“Look at you. You’re born to kill.”

“Hmm,” you smile against his skin, pushing his arm off of you to line his cock with your entrance. The feeling of him stretching you open with your fullness sinking down on him elicited stifled moans from both of you. You whimpered on his mouth as you swallowed his moans and praises, guiding his palms to cup your breasts. Satoru followed quickly, flicking your hardened nipples with his thumbs, his free hand caressing the curve of your spine. “I was born to make everyone’s life a living hell.”

“Mine included?”

“No,” you answered, pulling back to rest your forehead on his, breaths mixing together with lust looming over your faces. “I might just be your saving grace if you fuck me good enough.”

Something snapped inside Satoru. His lips attacked each patch of your skin – your neck, the sides of your breast, your collarbones and your shoulders – hands gripping at your waist and hips that filled out to carry his child. You could tell from the way his labored breaths mixed with yours and his eyes snapped shut tight that he craved to go rough with you, but he let you set your pace as you bounced on his cock, breasts moving before his lips in time for the motion.

“I should make you my wife,” he snarled, “You’re going to be a terrible little thing – wreaking havoc wherever you go. And I’d let you, god, I’d fucking let you. If you want to destroy everyone, I’d be there right by your side if that’s what you wish,” one particular slam down his cock with your full weight had you both seeing stars as you begin to come around him, your body much more sensitive than usual. As your pace slowed, Satoru got the message and held you up by the ass, helping you ride him out – back and forth, up and down, a rhythm of one, up, two, down. “Fuck – just wanna be good for you, shit.”

Salt coats your lips from the tears brought about by the intimacy you’d been craving, your grip on him tightening the more you remembered how unwanted you were. Albeit they were lies, it wasn’t that easy to forget that he had also claimed to not want you, which was the opposite of how he was making you feel in that moment.

Leaning down to capture his lips with yours, your tear dripped down his tongue. “Shut up and don’t say anything. You’re going to ruin it.”

“But I didn’t—”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” you warned, using the rest of your energy to meet his cock with each thrust. Satoru hit so hard and deep you never wanted him to leave, and you clung to him for dear life, arms wrapped around his shoulders as you received the ministrations of his affection. “Just let me feel you, please, I need you,” succumbing into the desire bursting through you, you came all over his cock, falling limp in his arms while his hips stuttered for a few beats. You felt his warm seed spilling until it made a mess on your laps, but neither of you could care anymore. Eyes growing heavy from working endlessly, you buried yourself in his arms and wiggled your hips, giving him room to pull his softening cock out from you. “I missed you.”

“Where’s your shower?”

Satoru carried you bridal style, your cheek resting above where his heart beat calmly. He ran you a warm bath, washing your hair and using slow, small strokes to run the soap all over your legs and between your legs. You’d been so tired, so lonely without him in time of being thrown into a world you weren’t really sure you were prepared for despite your confidence, that you couldn’t help but lean back in his chest, sighing as his hands caressed your soapy tits.

“Satoru,” you mumbled sleepily, head craning to the side to press a kiss onto his jaw. “Marry me.”

“What?” he chuckled nervously, sliding his legs out beneath you in the tub to make himself comfortable. Satoru eased you up by the armpits until you were sitting above his lap once more, sleepy eyes blinking up at his wide ones that searched for answers in your face. Finding none that satisfied him, Satoru shook his head and kissed your cheek, palm smoothing over your belly to lull you into a blissful state of serenity you never would’ve known without him. “You’re just tired, my love, you don’t know what you’re saying.”

“I’ve been thinking about it,” you insisted, taking his hands away from your belly as you kissed his knuckles, dazed fucked out and so vulnerable you could feel his hardening cock nudging your thigh. Satoru did nothing and bit his lips to restrain himself, eyes darkening as you tapped the finger you would’ve slid a ring in to symbolize your devotion to him. Extending his fingers, you nudged your cheek into his palm with a wavering smile. “You and I together – who would dare go against us? Together, we’re unstoppable. No one would look down on us anymore. We’d be a force to be reckoned with. Think about it. We’ll be powerful.”

Satoru didn’t budge.

“You don’t love me, Y/N. Being loveless in a marriage isn’t what you’d want.”

“What I want most is to become the one thing everyone failed to be,” you told him, slightly more awake and taunting as you slipped his hands down your neck and onto your breasts. His breath hitched from the motions of you all spread out for him, cock twitching and warm against your inner thighs. “Let me use your power and I’ll let you use mine. All you need to do is stay by my side. In return, I’ll protect you.”

“I can’t.”

You chuckled, unsure of what he was trying to say. “Why not? You wanted to marry me before.”

“I can’t marry you,” Satoru retracted his arms back to himself, his kiss on your palm more apologetic than adoring. You couldn’t read what went on his mind as he slowly pushed you off his lap, leaving you cold and alone in the water without his warmth. Unwanted. Unloved. Rejected. But maybe, just maybe, his heart never accepted you in the first place. “I’m already engaged to someone else.”

taglist closed:

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@misslovingpearl @xllance @charlie-xo @fiona782 @sassyglassesbunny @plusultra2dwhore @massivelynervousprincess @https-jane @vabybizzle @tehehebri @wishing-to-be-a-fictional-chara @g-r-boiii @thenezuko @la-vida-segun-manny @bananaandbrans @mephiis @lilith412426 @jibe-gajima @gladly-olus @choso-bee @trivia-134340 @captain-shittykawa @shingekiyofeels @dora-the-grownup @iwaizumiee @kinekyuroo @stesphy @badsadbby @evalynanne @chidori-me-sensei @jellymoonbear

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shittylongcatposts · 4 years ago

Text

Jumin week Day 5: tea/coffee

@juminweek2019

A/N: I wasn't feeling really good yesterday, so i didn't really get to write something for jumin week, but i at least thought about it and came up with an idea! So it's just a small Imagine or drabble or something. Enjoy!

The little ring of the door bell nearly got a constant sound for you, and you wondered when the day will come where you didn't notice it anymore. It was really busy over the last week and your customers were either very joyful and kind or in a pretty bad mood, not even saying thank you or a hello.

Despite the hard work you really loved working in that small coffee shop. Enjoying the smell of freshly brewed coffee or tea and getting to talk to people was a nice way to keep yourself occupied after your break up.

Today was a different day though. You didn't even get to talk properly to the regulars, because there were so many people coming in. There even was a line with people waiting to get inside. Your eyes glanced nervously over the folks standing outside while you prepared the next order. While recognizing some of the faces, there were also some you did never see before. Especially one guy who stood outside took your attention. He wore a suit, and was currently speaking with someone over the phone. His dark hair looked disheveled and wild and you wondered if he ever used a comb or a brush before.

"Please son, reconsider and talk to her, you maybe even start liking Sarah. She's a nice girl and Glam and I would really like it if it work out." The voice over the phone said yet again.

Jumin sighed, there was no way he would listen to his father this time. This girl came to his home, without even knocking on the door and just invaded his precious privacy, as Luciel would call it.

"No father I won't reconsider. You need to clear your head and your heart. Are you really willing to sell of your son because of a company you never even heard of before? Look I have to go, this talk is not over." And with that he pressed the red button.

Another sigh escaped his lips and he ran a hand through his hair. Man, this wet weather really makes it look like he didn't even brushed it before he left the house.

The next satisfied customer stepped out of the door and held the door open a little bit, so that Jumin could hurry inside. Being a guy with good manners he thanked him properly and wished him a nice day.

The shop smelled of freshly brewed coffee and the young man quickly took in all the little details. With a little bit of white paint the walls would really look fine in Jumins eyes. Right now it was a soft yellowish tone with some pictures in brown frames hanging on them. Here and there stood some small decorations which made the place seem full of live.

The customers could either sit on small comfortable couches or on dark wooden chairs, which where polstered with self sewed pillows as it seems.

The next person stepped up to the counter and placed his order. Without even saying hello and thank you. Didn't they learn how to properly place an order?

Then he felt his phone vibrating in his pocket. He took a quick glance on the screen and wished he didn't. It was his father again. For a short time he wanted to answer the call but it would be rude to discuss family matters in cafe. He pressed the red button again and let the phone glide into his pocket again.

"Hi how can I help you?" Jumin heard a soft voice speaking, only now realizing that it was his turn to order something.

He shook his head and stepped in front of the counter, figdeting with his cufflinks.

"I'd like to have a Coffee please."

He saw you blinking then you chuckled, a broad smile on your lips.

"Which brew would you like to have Mr.? And which size?" You held your finger up to show him the sign above your head. The odd dark eyes followed and read the sign thouroughly.

The customer behind Jumin placed a hand on his shoulder and stepped ahead. "Just take a seat and read the card there." The guy said, nearly hissing the words.

"Hey! It's not your turn now! Let him pick something first", you said and locked your eyes once again with the young man's.

"No it's ok, I think it's better if I sit down, I'm sorry." He said and took a look around to find a good place.

When he did, he sat down on a chair, quickly taking the card in his hand.

You sighed and took the next orders.

Finally being able to walk around again was amazing. You loved this part of your job, and were glad when your colleague told you she needed a break and wanted to work behind the counter. She gave you a quick impact of the tables who already got something and threw her head into the direction of the dark haired suit-man.

"He's watching you, you know? I bet he's super weird..." Your colleague giggled.

"I don't think he is. He doesn't look too happy, don't you think?" You said, while reaching out for your hair to put it in a ponytail.

"Who the fuck enters this place only to order a coffee without even knowing which brew he wants, Mc?"

"Maybe he didn't know better."

And with that you leaved her standing behind the counter, walking over to the table the suit-man sat at.

"Hey again, have you found something?"

"Hello, I'd like to have a coffee, the columbian brew, medium size, and an espresso afterwards please." He looked up from the card and smiled kindly. You could tell it was a fake smile and somehow you began to feel sorry for whatever happened to this guy.

"Ok, then, one columbian coming right up, I serve the epresso later, ok?"

You waited for him to nod and turned around to take care od the other guests. There was something about this guy that fascinated you. Maybe it was the suit, you always had a thing for them, or the dark hair?

While shaking your head to snap out of your mind you prepared the next orders. Then you got an idea, maybe a small piece of cake could light him up.

Wherever Jumin went, he always got into the center of attention. It was strange how some people always seem to recognize him. But he was glad that nobody wanted to take a picture of him right now or worse than that talk to him.

Shifting around on the pillow he sat on he glanced up, seeing you walking around the cafe, small talking with an old lady, even with your heavy looking tablet in your hand you still wore that kind smile on your lips. He didn't know why but you really fascinated him.

When you came up to his table again placing a little plate before him he tilted his head. "I'm sorry, but I didn't order that..." He was about to sad something more, but couldn't. Out of the corner of his eyes he saw that unfriendly guy from early, he didn't look where he was going and bumped into you. You tried keeping the balance of the tablet but lose the fight and the cup of coffee fell.

Right onto Jumins suit. He hissed because of the hot coffee and grabbed the cup. Catching it before it hit the ground. With a wince he looked at you. Your eyes were wide in shock and the first thing you could think of were the tissues on the table. Threwing them onto the young man you wanted to mop the hot liquid up. Tapping his upper leg and his torso with the tissues. The tissues however dissolved and one even left a red stain on his white shirt. He took your hands, throwing the tissues on the ground. He looked pissed. But he didn't look at you.

"Don't touch me, I'm ok.", He growled and jumped up to grab the arm of the other man.

"Don't you want to apologize?"

"Leave me alone. I don't have something to apologize for."

"Yes you do. You just bumped into them!"

"Mr, it's ok, come on I'll show you the toilet."

You grabbed his hand and he followed you. After closing the door you asked if he needed anything.

"I guess I'm ok. Thank you..." His voice was muffled through the door but you still like the dark tone of it.

"Mc, my name is Mc."

"I'm Jumin, ehm... Nice to meet you"

"Hey, I'm sorry you're having such a bad day. I wanted to make it better with that cake but I totally regret it now. I ruined your suit."

"You didn't do anything. Thank you." He opened the door a little and peaked through it. "Not for ruining my suit though. You don't happen to have a white shirt my size?"

You looked at him, and he was still smiling after all that happened. How was he able to do that?

"Actually we do. Here take this one." You gave him one out of the shelf and chuckled. "It's nowhere near as fancy as your old one but it'll do."

He closed the door again after grabbing the shirt and changed.

When he came our he held onto the dirty one in his hands, standing right before you. His eyes looking down on you and you blushed.

"You're cute. Thanks for helping me out." He said, making you blush even harder.

With one hand Jumin scratched the back of his neck, a little pink on the cheeks himself.

"I never introduced myself through a door before. It was fun talking to you, here take my card, if you ever want chat again." He bowed down and closed his eyes.

God he looked so wonderful in that moment that all you could think of was to give him a quick kiss on the cheek. His eyes grew wider at your reaction and he blushed.

Stumbling a few steps back you took the card and wrote your number on it.

"Let's do it like this, take my number and call me when you have a bad day, deal?"

"Deal."

And with that you turned around hurrying back to work, letting Jumin stand there on his own.

He leaned back against the wall looking at your number. God he really started to like you.

#juminweek2020 #juminweek20d4 #jumin han #mystic messenger #mysme #juminxmc #shitty longcat #no time to proof read #i need to go to work #haha!!!

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