#enby leo is everything I crave

[princessgemma12]

i'm not nero but nonbinary leo Is my beloved - i'll use they/them here, but what do you think their pronouns are? and how do you think their brothers take them coming out? and finally (sorry) do you think Leo lets themself present not-masc, because i think they'd have WAY too much internalized trans/nonbinary-phobia to do much more than quietly correct pronouns for a good while.

Hm... defaulting to 2012 but feel free to ask about Rise or Bayyy

Under the cut 'cause what is conciseness?

I think Leo's pronouns would be they/he/she--preferably they/them but mixes of he/her and even some neutral neos thrown around are just Really Nice for them. Sometimes Leo leans toward one set or another a little more than usual, but they/them is generally Pronoun Perfection. Eventually adopts (they/she/he)/Blue pronouns, sorta, but more on that later.

As for her coming out, I think it would depend. I'll use two basic scenarios here, one that follows the canonical timeline (here) and one where Splinter lives--i.e., "My" basic timeline--in a reblog.

So for "canon" I think coming out would be much easier for Leo--they wonder what Splinter would think, what he'd say, but they don't stress themselves out over it too bad. They hope he would be proud and accepting, is pretty confident that he would be but is still a little nervous that he wouldn't be. They aren't so worried about April or Shini or Karai or Mikey or Donnie--Dee actually helped with some terminology, though he doesn't know it, yet--but Leo is a bit worried about Raph and Casey, and the Mutanimals because he doesn't know them quite as well, and R&C don't really talk about this stuff so they just don't know what to expect.

So he's nervous but fairly confident that things will work out just fine--the little voice that tells them Mean Things disagrees but it's rarely ever right so Leo knows better than to listen to it by now. Still starts shaking when they sit the Main Fam down to talk in the pit, but they power through and try to sip their tea while explaining things. Almost chokes on it a few times but succeeds in not burning their tongue. Shinigami is the first person to say anything, and it's a reference to that tumblr loading screen meme that's been going around--April and Raph almost die laughing, but Leo doesn't get it. Shini has to explain it to them.

They've stopped shaking by the time Raph's calmed down, and everybody's got these little smiles that just say "We're so proud of you! We're so happy you trusted us with this! We won't let you down!" (They do, in fact, let him down, a number of times, but it's not for lack of trying.)

So they move on to gentle jokes and talking over some basic changes that will need to be made--Leo sticks to the simplicity of they/he for now, 'cause they aren't sure how his brothers would react to using she/her. They resolve themselves to other smaller discussions in the future, when they've got their footing back. Donnie and April quickly devise speaking exercises to help get everyone shifted from a he/him habit to a they/them habit, but Karai's the only one on board. Shini picks the change up pretty quick and Mikey stumbles a little but starts defaulting to "thude" (first "dude" but April interjects), which is a little closer to habit and what Leo says "That's a nice starting point!" because Mike's trying so hard and everyone's taking it so well and they really couldn't be happier--Raph keeps stumbling over he and his and wincing and mumbling sorry but he's correcting himself and apologizing even though Leo's not upset.

"It's okay if it takes some time, I don't mind that--I know this is a big change and I know this will be a challenge for you guys, too! I'm really happy that you're all taking this so well and trying so hard."

And Leo means that, he really does! But they all see the way his face lights up when they use they/them and wait Casey what did you say? Case's just been sitting their mumbling "This is my friend, Leo, they use they/them pronouns" over and over again because he's practicing a new introduction to the turtles--he can't just say "These are the turtle brothers, they're my friends" anymore, after all. Leo's just really proud of them all because this is their family, and they're all fantastic and Splinter would be so DAMN proud right now, wouldn't he?

They end up crying afterward and get Mikey hugs for days because how else does Mike show people how much he cares?

All in all, everyone adjusts pretty quickly--the guys and Leo still stumble around how appropriate "bro" is as an affectionate term is, and it's decided that it's fine unless it isn't (usages such as "brooo" or "Bro, check this out!" because it doesn't feel quite as gendered to him as it might to others--they all use it for each other, including the girls, so it's usually Okay). Leo will let them know if it's ever not Okay, but (shyly) makes it clear that they don't want to be referred to as anyone's brother. Sibling is Perfect, thank you. This becomes a Minor Issue for Raph because now there's this big gap in his vocabulary where Big Brother used to be, and it's... just really fucking hard to work that out of their relationship. He was doing great switching his language for Leo and now he feels kind of like a dick because he keeps saying Big Brother when talking to them. Mikey just changes his affectionate Big Bros to a silly Issue One (as in Issue One Sibling, like they're all comic books or something) and Donnie plucked out Androgynous Scaled Amphibian one day it stuck for gods knew why (because Leo laughed like a little kid). But Raph didn't know what to switch it out for. He's stumbling around trying to fill this hole up and he just doesn't know why? Like? What the fuck? Why this one thing?

He's still stumbling through it around the half-year mark and Leo's gotten pretty well used to walking past a conversation and hearing things like "Well, then I told them that they blah blah blah and he said blah blah blah, and naturally I told them to blah blah blah and they..." and Mikey and Donnie's new nicknames. They're no longer shy about correcting anyone if they don't feel like he/him right now but doesn't really know how to handle what's being called the Raphael Issue. They've made their stance on "brother" clear and corrected him, and he's corrected himself, and apologized and said he'll do better but--

As things usually do between them, it becomes an argument.

Things escalate quickly--like, really quickly. It's record-breaking. Raph's not mad at Leo--not in the slightest!--but he's frustrated with himself and why can't he just let this fucking name go? why? It's ridiculous! But Leo's pissed and oh fuck no, he said something stupid and mean and now Leo's crying and--

"Blue, I'm sorry, okay! But I don't know what the fuck I'm doing; I'm not trying to be a dick, I'm trying and I get it, I do, but can we just--"

And he finds his solution! It's like something clicks in his brain like yes, that's who you are--you are my Blue and I love you and this is my name for you now! I'm sorry I upset you, please consider this my apology present. It takes a while for them to calm down enough to actually talk about it, but when Raph explains what he was feeling, and Leo does the same, they get it--'cause for forever Leo was Big Brother and Fearless; those were their names and they meant something important. It doesn't work to just have one but an adjustment--a replacement--needed to be made. Leo likes the way Blue sounds and the way it felt kind of like a childhood nickname, and immediately notices how easy it is for Raph to insert "Blue" after "Big" if he screws up a little. It's cute and rolls off the tongue and they like it a lot. Like A Lot a lot.

Raph notices and kinda defaults to Blue whenever he's talking about Leo with/to someone. Leo thinks it's funny and lets him have it. It makes them both really happy.

It works in their favor because eventually (probably somewhere around one-two years 'cause Leo is a shy and nervous boi) she decides okay I'm ready and I can do this! and open up to more feminine presentation and pronouns/terms. They talk to everyone individually this time--he decides that Mondo's poorly-worded questions weren't worth dealing with right now, and so lets the Mutanimals learn through osmosis--and it goes a little less smoothly overall.

April grins ear-to-ear when they mention an interest in makeup and the excitement is a bit too much too fast for them to handle--she gets it, and backs off, and doesn't mention it again. They understand that the offer for "lessons" is on the table. Karai and Shinigami react more calmly but both slip a couple things in their pockets on their way out--a couple colors of eyeliner and lipstick and two shades of blue nail polish (Leo secretly appreciates it). Casey... Casey handles it. Okay-ish. It's clear that he's uncomfortable but he doesn't say anything and promises to take Leo's requests to heart. Leo gets it. Kinda hurts but they understand because change can be hard. They trust Casey's word and know that he'll keep it, that he means it.

Their brothers are less of a mixed bag, so to speak.

Donnie seems totally unfazed and immediately asks if "sister" is in the same box as "brother" or not, what feminine terms they're comfortable with, etc. He gets his facts straight and Leo balks when he writes them all down. "I need to study these to implement good habits, Leo!" They're privately very very pleased with the reaction and the warning to "check all ingredients on any cosmetic products" before using them.

Mikey asks similar questions but far more rapid-fire. Leo barely has time to answer before the next one is coming at him. In true Mikey fashion, he implements everything very very quickly and throws things around more than anyone else can manage at first. It makes Leo really proud and happy and causes a lot of giggle fits for everyone. The gender euphoria when Mikey says "Oh, yeah, she loves that show! Huh? Oh, no, my sibling Leo! Yeah! He eats it up!"

(The jumbling sometimes happens even when Leo doesn't really want it to, though, and it's hard to explain but Mikey seems to get it and works on it. He stumbles sometimes but usually does fine.)

Raph... doesn't say anything. Like anything. At all. He just grins and gives Leo a thumbs like "Cool, okay"--no questions, no nothing. It weirds them out a little but they don't want to start an argument so they let it go and just kind of keep an eye on their interactions with Raphael for a while. They start finding bottles of nail polish on their nightstand and her meditation mat in the dojo, all blue, every few weeks, and soon they have baskets of the stuff. Apparently, Raph was trying to be encouraging. Leo had to ask him to stop because holy crap how am I supposed to use all of this, Raphael, it's too many!

His name doesn't bother them, never has, but they play with the syllables to figure out how many different nicknames they have to work with--Raph picks up the old name Leelo, something from when he couldn't quite pronounce Leo correctly (he also picks up L for the more feminine days because it sounded like "Elle"); everyone else goes with Lee and sometimes L. Mikey does start calling Leo "Lee-enard-o" as a joke, though, and Donnie's the only one that gets it.

Honestly, it takes a while--probably about three years for Leo to get comfy with themself enough to begin not feeling self-conscious about things. It takes a while longer for them to really embrace the need for more obvious feminine things, but when they do Mikey is Ready with the skirts and dresses, yes, now he has someone to play dress-up with again! and April provides them with a plethora of hoodies with non-binary pride designs (his favorite is their "Non-bino-saur" one). Raph decides to take up nail art and no one is safe--Casey decides he likes the skull designs Raph picked up for Halloween and insists they live forever on his fingers. Shini and Karai are quiet about things but help them embrace their goth side. It becomes a pretty common sight for Leo to be chilling in the pit with a fuckton of eye makeup on and a "cisn't" hoodie on. They absolutely adore all the gifts because yes! gender euphoria!

Honestly, they just become the epitome of assume nothing! and they live for it.