#empty space pisses me off :p

[mugwot]

Have you ever wanted to draw something but you fought due to your skill level at the time you decide not to do it

i will usually at least try it

it won’t be good but if i got an idea i will throw it down into a sketchbook, fiddle with it to see if i can make it work.

this mostly doesn’t result in a finished art piece!

but sometimes if you draw a shitty thing 10 times it won’t be as shitty the 11th time.

the process also allows to find blind spots that you can work on instead of avoiding them

[lokissweater]

beetlejuice!

{beetlejuice!satoru gojo x f!reader}

— “ may you never forget me ” ♪ ༘⋆

summary: living as a psychic medium was like a ticket straight to nothing in your life, you always accidentally creeping people out and scaring them when you talked about it, and you just feeling empty— like something was missing and vacant in your life with no explanation as to why. but upon stumbling through an attic inside a house of a recently deceased couple, you meet him— beetlejuice, a silly and wacky man who was damned to live in the attic for eternity due to him breaking the rules, you never having met a spirit so forward and flirtatious in your life as you quickly bonded. but when beetlejuice presents the idea of you being able to break his contract and finally set him free, you hesitate at the one condition… marrying him.

warnings: MDNI afab!reader, DIABOLICAL angst my god, angst w/ comfort though YIPPEEE, mentions of death, mentions of murder, reader is a psychic medium, fluuufff, SMUUUTTT, p in v sex, DOM AFF SATORU MEOOWWW, unprotected sex (wrap it y’all), creampie, oral, blowie, mentions of ghosts and spirits and things, loosely inspired by the 80s movie, mentions of reader having ‘pink cheeks’ is only to amplify and over-exaggerate feelings of embarrassment, shyness, and everything in between, and not to be taken literally! this is a work of fiction, and you can imagine many things for yourself :)

word count: 19.8k

authors note: YEEEEEOOOOWWWW GET READY YALL….. SHES FREAKY… SHES ANGSTY… AND SHES THE MOMEEEENNTTTT omg i absolutely LOOOVEDDD writing this one so much and i hope you guys find it interesting or i’m gonna CRYYYY HEHEHEH no i’m jk but as always, i love you SO SO SO much and thank you for all of your love and support !! MWAAAHHH <333

you’ve always had a knack for the paranormal.

and from the newspaper clippings you saw and the meddlesome whisperings of your fellow neighbors, newlyweds adam and barbara maitland died on their way home from a day out in the town— swerving in their vehicle while crossing over a bridge and crashing through the side of it, evidently sending themselves tumbling down to the river below and drowning.

it was the biggest tragedy your tiny town had ever been hit with, the maitland’s having renovated their house on the hill from scratch and had recently just finished it when the accident happened, the both of them in the midst of planning their honeymoon to get away from winter river for a little while, happy and in love and looking forward to a quiet serene life together.

it was a shame, really, and it only took two weeks for rumors to spread about how there were always weird moving shadows from the windows of their two story home, or slight flashings of neon blue or white seeping through the cracks of their front door— all of which pissed the realtors off seeing as the rumors prevented the house from being sold again, prospected buyers coming in with high hopes only to be scared off once they so even explored the town, a store clerk or a fellow neighbor quick to tell them of the gossip and to stay away, ultimately causing the house to collect dust and cobwebs until realtors decided they wouldn’t bother much with it anymore.

and the rumors always peaked your interest, as your entire life you’ve always had a passion for the supernatural seeing as your late parents were psychic mediums for the otherworldly, a beautiful ominous gift that was relayed to you from the moment you were able to correctly comprehend sentences, your mind and soul more welcoming to spirits of the unknown compared to regular folk who flat out refused.

and why? you didn’t know. they were just mystic entities that perhaps couldn’t find their way to the other side like they were intended, and if the rumors were true, the maitland’s were in the same predicament, and you felt like they just needed time and space without the pestering of realtors or dumb kids knocking on the windows to see if a ghost would pop out— deserving of a proper chance to figure it out.

except your boyfriend wouldn’t understand that either.

“babe c’mon!” he pleaded with you, a distressed look on his face. “i thought you liked creepy ghost shit?”

you scoffed. “yes rin but not to fucking break in and steal their things! what the hell’s the matter with you?!”

rin groaned and rubbed his eyes, his friends obviously annoyed and bothered by your defiance and it only made you feel awkward, sitting there on your desk chair in your college dorm and guiltily picking at your black nail polish.

“y/n we literally cannot go if you don’t go.” he pushed. “we need your ghost brain to tell us if they’re around so we can scram if they decide to kill us.”

you snorted, already aggravated by rin’s lack of respect and wholeheartedly believing dumb stereotypes.

“you’re committing a crime—”

“the house is abandoned! no one gives a shit!” he threw his arms up. “babe c’mon i’m serious it’s getting late and we’re losing time.”

why wasn’t he listening?

“what are you looking for anyways?” you mumbled.

“money.” he replied, grabbing his black bag and swinging it over his shoulder. “that’s literally it i won’t take anything else.”

“do you swear?” you peered up at him. “don’t take jewelry or any of their things just money and we get out.”

“yeah we won’t! right guys?”

rin looked over both of his shoulders to ensure that his friends agreed, them muttering and sighing as you gnawed at the inside of your cheek and feeling embarrassed for some reason, slowly standing and crossing your arms.

you never liked his friends.

“and leave me out of it okay?” you spoke. “we could get kicked out of college for this i don’t know how you’re not worried…”

he swung a heavy arm around your shoulders and nudged you on, you stumbling a bit as he basically had a lock around your neck on your way outside.

“they’re not gonna care y/n.” he dismissed, unlocking the car and his friends piling in the back while you settled in the passenger seat. “nobody will. it’s abandoned.”

the entire way there you were aggravated and guilty, rin and his friends babbling on about the valuable things they’d hope to find and the kind of ghosts they thought would appear, not a single person in the car an actual believer of those paranormal rumors as they poked fun and teased, your forehead against the glass of the window and miserable as rin drove up the steep hill— the night chilly and so dark that you could barely make out the shape of the house until you were just about to pull up to the driveway.

rin turned off his headlights and tuned down the radio to avoid drawing attention, steering wheel shifting a little to the right so the car could gradually round over and stop next to the front steps of the porch— rin shutting off the ignition once he parked and stuffing his keys into his pocket.

and you could immediately feel a presence even from outside the house, your arms stiff and tingly as you all quietly got out of the car and made your way to the stairs, dry dirt crinkling beneath your shoes as you tried to swallow back your nerves knowing that at any moment you could all be fucking arrested.

“are you sensing ghosts?” rin whispered, a sly teasing grin on his face as the floorboards of the porch creaked with your movements, his hand reaching and jiggling the doorknob.

“yeah.”

his eyes snapped over to you. “…really? yeah right.”

“no i’m serious.” you whispered back. “what did you bring me for if you’re not even gonna believe when i tell you—”

“okay! okay i’m sorry.” he apologized, though it didn’t seem genuine as he patted your back. “i believe you trust me.”

“wait— she said there’s ghosts?” one of his friends piped up. “how do you know?”

you went to answer but rin beat you to it.

“she’s a psychic… i guess.” he unzipped his bag and pulled out a mini tool kit, a mix of screwdrivers and bobby pins inside. “she can sense them.”

“oh my god…” another one mumbled, all of his friends eerie now. “rin— i thought you said those rumors were bullshit.”

your eyes narrowed. “you said that?”

“no!— i mean, technically yes but—” he took two bobby pins from the kit and put the rest of the box away, hunching down to lock pick the knob. “you guys really think any of that is real? it’s just the neighbors man they’re bored—”

“people here don’t just make up rumors like that rin.” you cut him off. “the majority of winter river is elderly and in retirement why the fuck would they be making up—”

“because they’re old and bored—”

the lock released a prominent click and rin tested the doorknob again, this time it turning all the way and opening as he pushed it wide, you all proceeding cautiously and it somehow being colder inside than it was outside as the group shined their flashlights around every corner and space, not bothering to tell your boyfriend that the presence you felt earlier was ten times stronger now, for rin never really believed you or just thought you were being funny whenever you mentioned things like that to him.

you had known rin since the start of college, him always the rebel dickish type as he didn’t follow directions or liked whenever people tried to tell him what to do, and how you ended up crossing paths with him and it sticking was something that was a mystery to you.

rin was everything you wanted at first.

and though he was a bit selfish, you foolishly looked past the fact and let him meddle his way into your already monotonous life, it being hard for you to make friends in the first place because of your psychic abilities— always feeling like something was missing and… vacant for years growing up without any explanation as to exactly why, figuring it was just the side effects of your parents’ passing.

but it still didn’t help when you’d accidentally partake in scaring off and weirding people out when you mentioned that you just saw their deceased relative wander by, rin being one of the first to actually stay because he didn’t believe you, choosing to turn a blind eye to something you treasured about yourself the most, stuck and left to wonder if there was ever someone who did.

but turning a blind eye to just your psychic ability became him turning a blind eye to everything about you, and you felt like he never really listened to what you had to say or cared, often switching the topic back to himself or giving you a series of ‘mhm’s’ and ‘yeah’s’ to get you to move on.

you didn’t feel seen anymore, but you loved him still for some reason.

“where do we even look?” one of his friends whispered, the lot of you traveling as a group through the entry room and down the hall to the kitchen.

“wherever you think a money bank would be.” rin mumbled, leading you all and going round to the living room, his flashlight shining over dusty furniture and spiderwebs. “i think it’d be better if we split up. half of us can take upstairs and the others can look through the kitchen, y/n and i are gonna dig through here for a bit—”

“what?” you spoke, his friends nodding and walking off to their designated areas. “rin no i told you i’m not—”

“oh my god babe— would it really hurt you to just peek in some freaking drawers? let me know if something looks like it has money in it alright?”

he stepped over to the middle and crouched by the coffee table, opening and closing several compartments. “be useful please.”

you scoffed. “you’re the one who dragged me here and i told you i wasn’t getting involved.”

“you’re not.” he mumbled, standing back up and going over to a big brown dresser on the side. “just look at shit and don’t touch anything. tell me if you see money.”

you rubbed your cheek in exhausted frustration, thinking it’d be better to just mindlessly look around to appease him as you caught and stared at the photographs over by the fireplace— a wedding portrait of whom you assumed to be adam and barbara maitland propped up amongst others of family and friends, your fingers raising to gently wipe away the dirt and grime from the glass to get a clearer look of them.

you felt awful that their lives were taken from them just when they had built such a loving foundation for it, and you felt even more awful that rin and his stupid friends were invading their space and stealing in the way that they were with no sense of respect.

a sudden loud thud from upstairs made you and rin stop in your tracks, the both of you unmoving as you tried to listen.

“i’m gonna—” you gnawed at your bottom lip. “i’m gonna check upstairs—”

“no absolutely not.” rin shook his head. “it’s probably just my friends it’s fine.”

“if it’s the maitland’s your friends aren’t gonna know what to do besides shit themselves—”

“okay yeah sure.” he laughed, opening and closing different drawers from top to bottom. “it’s the house babe it’s old and worn out. maybe the— wood or whatever is acting up.”

you pursed your lips, arms crossing and apprehensive as you stood next to him, knowing with everything in you that the maitland’s were definitely still present.

“can we please just go rin...” you asked softly. “please we’ll— we’ll find a different building that’s actually abandoned and doesn’t have the maitland’s still here—”

he scoffed. “y/n this one is abandoned.“

“but it’s only been three months!” you exclaimed. “i don’t wanna do this to them—”

“—oh sweet! there’s a rolex in here—”

“no!” you snatched the watch from his upheld hand and backed away towards the fireplace. “you swore to me just money these are their things—”

“y/n they’re dead! who fucking cares? all of their shit’s gonna be donated might as well pawn it.”

“yeah for your own benefit right?” you mumbled, pushing past him and walking down the hall. “i’m going home.”

he looked at you baffled. “are you serious? over a dumb watch?”

“rin you’ve gone back on everything you promised and you’re not taking me seriously—”

“did i take the watch? no i didn’t so stop—”

“i’m not talking about just the watch!”

“you know what?! fine!” rin shoved a hand in his pocket and pulled out his keys, chucking them at you and hitting against your chest as you scrambled to catch them. “go wait in the car.”

you threw them back and they hit his upper arm, his eyes narrowing at you in return as he then bent down to grab them from the floor.

“i’m not waiting in the damn car i’m walking home.”

“you’re walking?” he shook his head. “back to your dorm? that’s gonna take you like an hour y/n.”

you shrugged.

“fine go i don’t give a shit.” rin muttered and rolled his eyes. “you always do this man—”

you didn’t bother to stick around for anything else he had to say as you trudged on down the hall and back to the main entryway, tears brimming your eyes at the lack of care he had for you and scolding yourself for the thousandth time for staying with him, trying to understand why he was like this with you when all you’ve ever done was be patient and give him the benefit of the doubt when he didn’t fucking deserve it.

it was hard for you to tell if he even loved you anymore, and you always psyched yourself out that he did whenever he’d barely just accomplish doing the bare minimum.

upon arriving at the front door, you placed the rolex gently on a lonesome night stand by the coat hanger, your hand reaching and turning the knob to step outside until another loud thud shook through the walls, and louder this time as you pulled back and craned your head to look up the stairs.

muffled voices seeped from the top as they gasped and whispered to each other to shush, you recognizing some to be rin’s friends with irritation and worry simmering in your brain, wondering if they were messing with the maitland’s things and stealing what they weren’t supposed to steal, as they were just as uncaring and selfish as rin was throughout the time that you’ve gotten to know them.

and with that in mind, you let go of the doorknob and quietly walked up the stairs, every creak and groan from the wooden slabs underneath your feet making you wince as you went further and further until you reached the top, you sighing as you saw that the maitland’s room door was wide fucking open and with snickering inside.

but with each step that you took to get closer… the more prominent the goosebumps on your arms became and the heavier the feeling in your gut grew, a strange apparent flickering light from your right blinding your vision for a moment as you stopped and turned to look.

your eyes slightly widened, a neon lime green foggy light practically oozing from the attic staircase as it streamed over half of your frame, luring you in with your body mindlessly and curiously walking towards it and up the rugged squeaky stairs, fingers quickly reaching up to swing the attic door open and halting in alarm once you did, the green aluminous light from earlier completely encasing you entirely now as you stepped forward inside the attic.

the door swung and slammed itself shut suddenly, you jumping and spinning around with hurried hands coming up to pull and tug at the knob, breathing irregular upon realizing that it wouldn’t fucking budge and was somehow jammed with no explanation as to exactly how—

“boyfriend troubles?”

“oh my god!” you screamed, hand flying over your heart as your eyes snapped to the source, a tall lanky man standing there with a little grin and vibrant pale blue eyes that only utterly confused you, his vertically stripped black and white suit peculiar and unique as your frantic eyes darted over his figure.

you knew for a fact that the strange man before you wasn’t adam maitland, for the way he looked now didn’t match the pictures you saw in the newspapers at all, you swallowing thickly and slowly backing up against the attic door with your heart dropping straight down to your ass.

who the fuck was he? was he— was he a spirit? because if not there’s a random man literally just basking and relaxing inside the—

“relax! relax jeez you look like you’re about to vomit sweets.”

sweets?

“are you dead?!” you blurted, hand scrambling behind you for the doorknob. “are you— are you alive how are you—”

he laughed loudly and wiggled his little index finger— scrunching it up and down to elicit a ‘yes’ and finding your skittishness a little funny.

“yup! so dead very dead.”

“o— oh… okay...” you spoke softly, tense shoulders gradually relaxing as you gave him a small timid smile, relieved that he wasn’t a freaking squatter and doing god knows what up in the attic.

“you seem happier to see a dead man rather than a live one...” he looked at you amusedly. “you like ghosts? scary stuff? haunted houses? handsome me?—”

you nearly choked on your spit at his last comment, an awkward smile wobbling across your face as you played with your fingers.

“i— i um..” you looked around, your eyes catching a book titled ‘handbook for the recently deceased’ sitting neatly on a dusty table by the door. “you could say that.. but—”

you hesitated, the man’s head tilting to the side as he waited for you to continue.

“but what pretty?”

you blushed furiously, never having met a spirit so forward before.

“sorry but— how did you end up here?” you stood on your tippy toes to peer over his shoulders and around the attic. “and where are the maitlands?”

“oh, those lousy goodie two shoed meanies?” he mumbled, pouting and bitter as he crossed his arms. “beats me..”

you laughed a little, guard slowly coming down as he didn’t seem or feel like a bad person to you, and you thought that perhaps he was in the same boat as the maitlands and was just trying to find his way to the other side.

“why are they meanies?” you smiled, and he reciprocated, arms falling to his sides.

“well— i’m kind of being held in the attic against my will by the— holy shit wait!”

he threw his hands out in front of him and took quick stride full steps towards you, a wild excited expression on his face and you stiffening up again, backing up against the door.

“you can help me!”

“help… you..?” you squeaked.

he vigorously nodded. “yeah! the butthead caseworkers down in the netherworld banned me from leaving the attic… but you can give me a little leg room in my contract sweets!”

netherworld— caseworkers— banned—

“huh?!” you exclaimed, brows furrowed and utterly confused at everything he was fucking saying.

you’ve only ever seen spirits from afar or casually talked to them about something fleeting before they went on their marry way, but never in your life have you met such a complex soul that was so animate and asking you for a favor straight off the bat… as spirits usually just— knew what they were doing and eventually figured out how to get to the great beyond.

so the subject of caseworkers and the netherworld and whatever the fuck else he was rambling on about was something you were not familiar with.

“i did something they didn’t like.” he gave you a boyish half smile. “so they did some ritual thing and now i can’t leave the attic.”

you frowned. “why would they do that? what did you do?”

he waved you off and swung an arm around your shoulders, pulling you forward with him towards a huge 3D model in the center of the room that you barely just noticed— intricate and detailed and colorful as your brain put two and two together and figured out that it was a model of the entire city of winter river.

“don’t worry about it! but i overheard juno telling her assistants not to say my name three times or else i’ll be let out to roam around the house—”

juno? who’s juno?

“—and that’s why i really need you sweets because i’m dying in this fucking attic… way more than i already am.”

you blinked at him. “i’ve never— i’ve seen spirits all my life and i’ve never had any of them tell me about caseworkers? and juno? who’s juno?”

“the rule is that the land of the living isn’t supposed to know.” he pursed his lips and dropped his arm from your shoulders, picking up the book that you had spotted earlier and passing it to you. “says it in the handbook.”

you timidly took it from him and flittered through the pages, old and crinkly and a little worn out as the gist of the pages you saw was a guide for those beginning their post-livelihood and the steps they needed to do so— from waiting rooms in the netherworld to being assigned a caseworker to help you out to the great beyond and so forth, your eyes falling on a particular page and catching specific line.

‘live people ignore the strange and unusual.’

they do. wrongfully they do.

and since people had been ignoring you out of fear your whole life… did that mean you were strange and unusual too?

“what?” the unknown man spoke, softly as his blue gaze switched between your solemn expression and the book, shifting his position to stand right next to you and see what you were looking at.

“oh sorry!” you laughed it off, closing the book and placing it down. “nothing i was just—”

“‘live people ignore the strange and unusual?’” he repeated. “what about it?”

you shook your head and sent him a small smile. “nothing! i was just looking—”

“just because you can see spirits doesn’t mean you’re strange or unusual.”

you stilled, eyes big as you watched the way he froze up over what he said, sheepishly relaxing after a moment and lifting an arm to pat over your head.

“sorry pretty. i can read and manipulate minds and i poked in yours...” he looked at you apologetically. “it’s another reason why they threw me in this shit hole.”

he dropped his hand then, a sincere glint in his eyes. “but i mean it.”

“i don’t know…” you mumbled, looking down and playing with the hem of your skirt. “i’ve never really had friends because of it… and i feel like that book kind of confirmed what i’ve been thinking.”

you quickly picked your head up. “oh but— it’s okay! i’m okay i’m used to it spirits are nicer anyways and i’ve always been alone so—”

“that’s not true.” he mumbled.

your brows furrowed. “what do you mean?”

he funnily froze up again. “what do i mean what?”

“what’s not true?”

“oh! that— that spirits are nicer!” he quickly sputtered. “they’re assholes. all of them. every single one. including me!”

you giggled at his franticness and a smile spread across his face at that, endearing as he watched you slowly cheer up.

“people’s ignorance doesn’t define who you are sweets.” he spoke gently. “so don’t give them that right. you look perfectly fine to me!”

your eyes softened, wondering what the hell this man did that made the caseworkers down in the netherworld ritual him into a contract, as you were convinced it wasn’t even that bad at all and just straight up unfair, him being one of the kindest and silliest souls you’ve probably ever had the privilege to come across.

“i’ll help you.”

his eyes snapped to yours. “huh?”

“i’ll help you!” you spoke sweetly. “i’ll say your name three times so you can leave the attic.”

“wha— really?!” he exclaimed excitedly, hands animatedly flying everywhere as they went from digging into his white locks to all over his suit and then thrown out to grip over your shoulders, shaking you as you giggled again. “holy shit will you actually?!”

“yeah! why not?” you grinned. “i don’t think it’s right that you’re stuck up here all alone.”

“angel! angel! you’re an angel!” he wrapped his arms around your shoulders and stuffed your face into his chest, squishing you so fucking tight and honestly holding you way longer than he should’ve, but you not minding one tiny bit as you hugged him back and smoothed a comforting friendly hand over his broad shoulders.

“what’s your name then?” you muffled against his suit. “so i can—”

“ahhh fuck.” he muttered. “i forgot about one thing.”

you pulled back a little. “hm?”

“i can’t tell you my name.”

“what?” you looked at him confusedly. “what do you mean? why not?”

“it’s part of the stupid contract sweets...” he sighed heavily. “but i can give you clues! ooo!— like charades! ready?”

“oh! o—okay!” you nodded, him finally letting you go and stepping back.

“don’t freak out.” he grinned in a silly way. “i’m about to make things show up.”

your eyebrows furrowed. “make things show up?”

he waved his hand and a life sized fucking black bug appeared out of nowhere, landing on one of the old wooden rocking chairs in the corner of the room as it wiggled its little legs and peered around, you screaming and flying behind the strange blue eyed man while he laughed loudly and looked over his shoulders for you.

“it’s okay! just a figment of your imagination is all.” he cheesed. “but guess now!”

“guess what?!” you shrieked.

“what that is!” he pointed to the bug.

you peeked an eye out from his side, the bug still gross and horrifying as it wiggled it’s antennas.

“a bug!”

“what kind?”

“a beetle!”

“yes!” he nodded vigorously. “okay that’s the first part!”

“your name starts with beetle?!—”

he waved his hand again and the bug disappeared, a carton of orange juice replacing it instead and floating in mid air, a shiny glass cup next to it as you amazedly watched it pour its bright orange contents into the cup without spilling a single drop.

“…orange juice?” you spoke softly, timidly coming around from behind him. “your names beetle orange juice?”

“not quite!” he made a drinking motion with his hand.

“beetle drinking orange juice?”

he laughed. “no! you’re adding too many words pretty take some out.”

“beetle drinking juice?”

“nope.”

“beetle drinking orange?”

“colder.”

“beetlejuice?—”

“yes!” he threw his hands out, eyes wild and excited. “yes that! and you’ve already said it once now just two more times—”

“beetlejuice.”

“uh huh uh huh—”

“beetle— mmph!”

a pair of hands clasped over your mouth from behind you and pulled you back, you letting out a muffled scream as you thrashed and quickly pried their fingers away, you spinning around and fully expecting to see rin behind you with a shit eating grin and laughing in your face for scaring you.

except it wasn’t rin.

it was the maitlands.

“don’t say his name honey.” barbara spoke first. “trust me… don’t.”

“i mean— are we sure about this sweetheart?” adam looked at his wife. “maybe he isn’t all that bad… hell we don’t even know for sure—”

barbara shook her head. “adam, did you not hear a word juno said? he was about to take advantage of that poor girl!”

take advantage?

you heard a scoff behind you and you turned around, a disgruntled and pissed off look on beetlejuice’s face as he crossed his arms.

“jeez i know you don’t like me but that’s low.” he mumbled. “i wouldn’t do something like that.”

your head turned back to barbara. “you know who juno is?”

she nodded. “juno’s our caseworker… we got assigned to her in the netherworld after we died.”

“took us three months waiting in the waiting room until she finally got to us.” adam added, chuckling in humorous disbelief. “but all she really did was nag at us and warn us about him.”

adam pointed behind you and you turned around again, beetlejuice bitterly looking to the side with his lips pursed.

oh god.

had he been feeding you nonsense this entire time?

“warn about what.” you mumbled, and beetlejuice snapped his head in your direction with anxious eyes.

“juno calls him a bio-exorcist.” barbara informed you. “he tried to illegally cross over to the land of the living and bring himself back to life.”

your eyes bulged open. “back to life? how?”

“you switch souls with someone else through a ritual.” adam piped in. “juno says he attempted to trick and switch souls with somebody that was alive so he could terminate all who were living… and they didn’t even know about it.”

“that’s not true!” beetlejuice countered, utterly exasperated. “the old hag made that up!”

he quickly walked towards you, taking your hands in his and looking at you pleadingly.

“please sweets you’ve gotta believe me i never wanted to kill anybody—”

you ripped your hands away and glared. “so this entire time you’ve been lying, playing some hopeless victim so you can poke into my head and find out shit about me to use to your advantage?—”

“no! no i— i haven’t been lying about anything it’s juno!”

“juno.” you repeated coldly. “and what’s she lying about exactly.”

“about killing the living!” he threw his hands out in emphasis. “she literally pulled that out of her ass when her and her minions banned me—”

“and what about tricking that person to switch souls with you so you can come back?”

he faltered, words completely failing him and guilty eyes looking into yours so deeply that it nearly made you feel bad for yelling at him.

“that’s… that’s true.”

you let out a breath of disbelief and barbara put a hand on your shoulder, squeezing it gently and comfortingly as she looked at you with caring eyes.

“we don’t know what to believe either honey.” she began. “it’s a lot of he said she said… but it’s better to be safe. he tried to get us to say his name three times too in exchange for his help.”

you quirked a brow. “help? what do you guys need help with?”

“your buddies downstairs.” adam sighed. “they’re stealing our things and just messing up the house… but we’ve been watching you and we know you’ve been trying to get them out and so have we… horrendously though.”

“oh my god—” you slapped a hand over your gaping mouth. “i totally forgot about them! i’m so so sorry oh my god i can’t even begin to explain to you how embarrassing this is i’ve been telling them to stop—”

barbara laughed and waved you off. “it’s alright! we know sweetheart. but we’re not frightening enough to scare them off whatsoever… so that’s what we were trying to get his help for.”

“and i still can y’know…” he muttered. “even though you hate me.”

“i don’t hate you juno does.” she crossed her arms and leaned her weight on one side of her hip. “adam and i are lost we don’t know what’s going on and we can’t even read that thing for the recently deceased.”

“we’re just trying to get them out of the house son…” adam finished off.

and in that moment you felt like you were the one responsible for this. that if you had bitched about it harder, even screamed at rin to get him to stop or damn near called the fucking cops on them so that this wouldn’t be happening right now… the maitlands wouldn’t have to suffer and struggle like this every waking day to protect their home and what rightfully still belonged to them even after death.

because the maitland’s roaming around and producing shadows and figures and scaring the realtors and prospected buyers off wasn’t just for shits and giggles… but to try and keep what was once theirs and feel a sense of normalcy for the life they once had.

that was their great beyond. their home.

“i’ll get them to leave.” you smiled at barbara and adam. “i don’t care if i literally have to start fist fighting with his friends this is so unfair—”

“wait! are— are you sure sweets?” beetlejuice interjected worriedly. “your boyfriend’s kind of nuts and i can’t help you once you leave the attic—”

“i’m sure.” you mumbled, still bitter and annoyed at him. “can’t be anymore nuts than you basically trying to kill someone so you can prance around alive again—”

“i already apologized to the entire netherworld nation for that!” he argued. “but if you ask me, if it’s so bad then they shouldn’t have put the fucking instructions in the guidebook.”

“juno says guidebook reveals to you what you want most.” adam spoke. “because barb and i didn’t see a single page that had to do with that… mostly just tips on how to scare the living.”

beetlejuice closed his eyes exhaustedly and shook his head. “doesn’t matter. i’m not trying to trick anyone right now i just want to get out of this damn attic—”

he looked to you again. “—please say my name three times pretty i’ve poked in your boyfriends head and he’s looney i don’t want you to—”

“i’ll see you guys in a sec!” you walked over to the door and left a sputtering frustrated beetlejuice behind. “if nothing works i’ll literally just take my boyfriends keys and drive the car down the hill, he freaks over that thing—”

your voice trailed off as you walked down the creaky stairs of the attic and down the hall of the second floor, the maitlands main bedroom coming into view as you tried to get a script together in your head as to what exactly you were gonna tell rin… but your footsteps quickening at the sound of loud yelling and laughing coming from inside the bedroom, sounds of glass shattering and moving furniture making you panic as you practically stumbled in from the doorway.

and your heart stopped, rin standing there with a crow bar in his hands that he got from who the fuck knows where, smashing multiple vases and porcelain jewelry cases and stuffing his pockets full of anything that looked shiny and valuable in his eyes, the mattress and blankets thrown over to the side and the mainland’s things just completely ransacked as you took it all in.

“rin!”

he jumped and spun around, brows pinching upon seeing you standing there.

“what are you doing here? i thought you left?”

“what the fuck?!” you gestured to the broken shards on the floor and strewn about articles of clothing. “what the hell is wrong with you?!”

“calm down babe it’s fine.” he turned and smashed another small jewelry case, you scoffing in response. “it’s all useless shit that’s gonna dust over—”

“get out.”

he snorted. “uh huh—”

“i’m serious rin get out.” you spat. “all of you.”

“yeah like i’d listen to you.” he spoke harshly, eyes narrowed and sharp as he turned again. “go wait in the fucking car or go home—”

“i’m calling the cops.”

“what?!”

a series of protests and worrisome comments erupted in the air from the group, all thrown directly at a fuming rin as he chucked his crow bar to the side— it clattering on the wooden floor as he hastily trudged over to you and gripped your upper arm, yanking you with him and out of the room into the hallway by the stairs.

“what the fuck do you think you’re doing huh?” he spoke lowly and in your face. “embarrassing me in front of my friends like that?”

you shoved him off. “get out and find another building or i’m calling the cops rin.”

“yeah and if you do that i’m telling them you’re a shitty psychic medium so they can throw you in the shrink.”

your jaw dropped.

rin was being meaner than usual.

“why are you like this.” you mumbled. “i don’t even know why i’m still with you you’re an asshole and you’re pathetic—”

he got in your face again and grabbed your jaw, pressing you up against the railing of the staircase and damn near throwing you over as the edge of it dug into your lower back, your fingers gripping his arm and struggling to pull him away from you while his friends quietly gasped and silently watched in shock.

“pathetic? me?” he laughed humorously. “you’re the one who doesn’t have anything or anyone besides me and yet you still treat me like this you ungrateful bitch—”

“rin okay that’s enough dude let her go—”

“you wanna shut up? or do you wanna trade spots with her?” his fiery crazed eyes switched over to his friend, him only cowering under rin’s intense stare and shaking his head no, diverting his gaze and you still squirming and tugging for your freedom.

“get— off me—”

“or what?” he pushed you further back and your breath hitched, your feet off the ground now at this point as one of your hands shot out to grip the railing for support. “you gonna call your ghost friends for help? go ahead i wanna see you do it you lying—”

“beetlejuice beetlejuice beetlejuice!”

a thunderous roar broke out into the air, actual lightning and black smokey fog spreading over the ceiling and around you as rin instantly let you go and looked around, all of his friends in a pure state of fear and alarm as they lost sight of each other amongst the suffocating mist— including you as you frantically tried to look for a clear path out, unable to decide if you regretted what you had just done.

“never seen a man with such a power trip!” a booming voice echoed through the house that you quickly recognized to be beetlejuice’s, the walls vibrating with each word. “seems to me like it’s all bark and no bite!”

“what did you do y/n?!” you heard rin’s distant yelling from somewhere you couldn’t pinpoint, the air cold and prickling at your skin. “who did you call?!”

“a god!” beetlejuice excitedly answered. “achilles preferably! wait actually he’s a demigod not a—”

“who the fuck is achilles?!”

the air cleared in the center suddenly and revealed a petrified rin, wide eyed and angry as he whipped his head around to try and figure out what was going on.

“you don’t know who achilles is?” half of beetlejuice popped out of nowhere from above the fog and his friends screamed at the mere size of him, for he wasn’t the normal looking man you saw before but a borderline monster— huge and crazed as he looked down at rin in particular with a scary grin.

but his eyes were still a fascinating sparkling blue, oddly familiar in a way as you watched the scene before you through the black air, beetlejuice continuing.

“read a book your stupid is showing.”

he lunged while simultaneously popping his eyeballs out of their sockets with his tongue out, cartoonish and terrifying as his friends yelled for help and scrambled to try and leave, struggling though the smothering mist as you placed a hand over your mouth in shock.

beetlejuice sucked his eyeballs back in and blinked to adjust. “what? you guys scared too? shouldn’t have been so mean to my little sweets over there then!”

they all looked to you and you froze, rin’s gaze narrowing.

“his little sweets?” he clenched his jaw. “the hells he talking about?”

beetlejuice didn’t know why rin was so dumb for even attempting at getting near you again after everything he did and said— his footsteps quick and stompy towards you until he straight up smacked into an invisible wall and doubled back with a hand over his nose, your brows pinching in confusion.

you timidly reached a hand out, expecting your fingers to touch an invisible barrier except there wasn’t one at all as they fell through completely over nothing, your arm slowly retracting back to your chest.

you looked up at beetlejuice’s huge figure, and he gave you a bright cute smile that made your cheeks heat up.

“this is bullshit!” rin roared, wiping his bloody nose with the back of his hand and pointing at you after. “you’re a goddamn nutcase y/n! what kind of show are you putting on huh?!”

“me?!” you shot back. “maybe you should stop being a dick for once in your life and listen when i tell you things you idiot.”

“yup!” beetlejuice quipped. “doll if you’re still with him after all of this i’m gonna have to start haunting you in your dreams.”

your gaze switched to beetlejuice and you laughed, a little glint to his eye as he watched you shake your pretty head.

“i was gonna dump him the minute i got him out of the house—”

“what?!” rin barked. “dump me? for what?!”

you scoffed. “are you serious? what do you mean for what?”

“fuck— babe okay i’m sorry alright? i’m sorry i’m just a little overwhelmed right now—”

“you’re a sack of shit.” beetlejuice spat. “and call her babe again and i’ll start the engine of your car and ram it through a tree.”

you snickered and rin swiveled around to face him.

“why don’t you stay out of this freak and leave my girlfriend alone—”

“sweets i’ll make him go away if you marry me.”

you choked, flustered and stiff as you looked at him, bewildered out of your mind.

“huh?!”

“pretty pleeaaseee.” he dragged. “you saying my name got me out of the attic but not the house itself… but if you marry me i’m a free man!”

“how does that—” you let out a shocked breath. “how does that even make sense—”

“marry me.”

“but i!—”

“marry me that’s my condition.”

“hold on!—”

rin dove at you with the full intention to grab you and pull you away, but eyes widening in terror as an invisible force practically grabbed his ankle and sweeped him back and away from you, dragging his body across the wooden floor and over to beetlejuice, his friends having enough of all of this and making a run for it down the stairs.

“oh! i almost forgot about you guys!”

beetlejuice nudged his head and they were sent flying back just like rin, all of them screaming and pleading for mercy as their bodies dragged across the floor and returned to him.

“which of you should i gobble up right now… i’m feeling the one on the far right! he’s trembling like a little leaf—”

“please no!” he cried. “i’ll— i’ll do anything! i’ll leave i’ll never—”

“—and i’ll save rin for the very end… best for last right?!”

they all wailed and clawed at the foggy air, your body unmoving as you tried to figure out if beetlejuice was actually being serious.

“please man!—”

“i’m sorry i’m so sorry!—”

“don’t apologize to me you doofuses.” another invisible force grabbed them all by the ankles and pulled them up, dangling them upside down. “apologize to her. then maybe i’ll spare you… how’s that sound?!”

“y/n! please! i’m sorry—”

“we’re sorry dear god!—”

“y/n!—”

“put— put them down!” you wavered. “that’s enough it’s okay! jesus..”

“awww already?!” beetlejuice pouted. “but i haven’t even started swinging them around yet… like a little ferris wheel! heh.”

you slapped a hand over your mouth to suppress a laugh once rin and his friends started wailing in fear again, you shaking your head and smiling at him.

“it’s okay! next time! just let them go i’m sure they’ll run—”

“y/n, it seems like you understand me… you’re the only one that hasn’t bitten my head off in the entire three years that i’ve been dead!”

you laughed again. “i’m glad! now put them down please—“

“so be my wife then.”

“beetlejuice!”

“what?!” he whined. “you don’t wanna be my lawful wedded wife?”

“no!— well— just—”

“is it because i’m dead?”

“put them down and i’ll consider it!”

“yes ma’am!”

the invisible force dropped them and they slammed against the hardwood floors, each and every single one of them fumbling to get their things that flew out of their pockets while upside down and scurrying away, hurried footsteps stomping down the staircase as they tripped over their feet to get to and out the front door, you observing in amusement and slight guilt, leaning over the edge of the staircase to watch them go.

and the second that they did, the stuffy black fog lifted and felt immensely lighter, it dispersing into the air above you as it thinned out to a mere silly mist, cold and wet to the touch and similar to the air you’d feel after a long days worth of rainfall and cloudy weather, slow strides coming up from behind you as you saw beetlejuice’s shiny raven leather dress shoes out of the corner of your eye, you standing upright and turning to him.

he smiled warmly at you.

“thank you.” you grinned, bashful as he reached and fixed up your hair— hands smoothing over your head and down before his fingers lightly grazed and played with the ends of your strands.

“you’re welcome.” he murmured. “thank you for getting me out of the attic sweets!”

you kindly nodded.

“sweetheart, are you alright?”

you looked back and saw the maitlands, barbara walking up with outstretched arms and pulling you in for a hug.

“that boy was insane!” she pulled back and held you out at an arms length by the shoulders. “we tried so hard to intervene while he was yelling at you but we’re useless… they couldn’t see us.”

you giggled. “no it’s okay! really you didn’t need to i wouldn’t ever wanna put you guys in that position.”

“honey— he almost pushed you off the railing…” adam spoke softly. “if you hadn’t called for beetlejuice lord knows what he would’ve done… he was so aggressive and we were worried…”

your heart warmed, never in your life having been so cared for and looked after— funnily enough that you were receiving that sacred feeling from beings that were dead rather than living and it reminding you a little bit of the way your parents were with you when you were young, when they were still alive.

“we’re sorry for being so hard on you kid…” barbara sighed, gaze shifting to beetlejuice. “mistakes happen. i’m sure your passing was something you weren’t expecting like us.”

“oh! no it’s okay don’t.” he smiled brightly. “i almost killed a man i understand.”

“but we understand too.” adam added, and you felt like he was also referring to something you had no clue about as he had a particular look in his eyes, something that was only amongst them three. “i would’ve considered the same.”

beetlejuice swung an arm around your shoulders and looked down at you.

“so are you my little wife?”

“okay—” barbara laughed. “not that you know this—”

“adam! barbara!”

a sudden shriek boomed through the house and beetlejuice instantly pulled you behind him, waving his hand and an invisible force sending you further away until your back gently bumped against the wall, panic rising in your chest as the same black fog from earlier returned and swirled around you, blocking your vision.

was he… was he hiding you? what for?

“juno!” beetlejuice greeted, laughing awkwardly. “heyy long time no see!”

oh.

“zip it bozo.”

from the cracks and openings that you could see through the whirling wind, a proper old lady in professional office attire stood there with her arms crossed, a pissed off look on her face as she tapped her heel against the floor and played with the pearls around her neck.

“what did i tell you two about letting him free?” she scolded. “he’s a loose cannon! he’s not to be trusted!”

“i know i know we’re sorry… we just really needed to get those kids out! and they’re gone! and beetlejuice seems alright!” barbara looked to her husband, a desperate flicker in her gaze. “right adam?”

“yes! uh uh!” adam stepped forward and sighed softly. “please juno… he’s just a kid. he’s learned and what he did was three years ago—”

“what he did could’ve cost me my job and set my entire office up in flames.” juno lectured, pointing her wrinkly finger at beetlejuice next. “you broke a million undead laws and have hundreds of violation codes on your record. your punishment was to stay in the attic for eternity.”

eternity?

oh god no.

“but now i’m gonna have to send you to live inside mr. maitland’s winter river model and you better stay there!”

“what?!” beetlejuice scoffed. “juno please there’s gotta be a way i can lift those violations?”

“i’m afraid there isn’t.” she seethed.

“pretty please?”

“no.”

“with a cherry on top?”

“absolutely not.”

“not even probation?—”

“not even probation! you’re gone!”

your eyes blew open as you watched juno extend an arm out and move it to the side, a bright white blinding light encasing her entire figure and you quickly pushed a hand through the black fog and grabbed the back of beetlejuice’s suit, everything around you scarily blurring out and disappearing and you squeezed your eyes shut, arms reaching out to wrap around his upper torso as you buried your face in his back.

you didn’t want him to go… not at all. and the thought of him stuck inside a model forever like that all alone terrified you.

you understood why he was punished in the first place, but why couldn’t juno just see that he was good? that all he was trying to do was come back to life and live? something many other souls would also kill for?

hadn’t he been punished enough already? he stood stuck in that attic for three god damn years straight with no means of escape whatsoever, and now he was shamefully being sent to live inside a styrofoam cardboard model that was far worse than that stupid attic, for now he couldn’t be seen by anyone even if he truly wanted to be.

had that not been enough? enough of a sign to reconsider his contract?

why couldn’t he just be given a second fucking chance—

“pretty?”

you opened your eyes, forehead quickly detaching from his back and looking up, his piercing blue eyes staring down at you worriedly from behind as he shifted his body a little in your hold to face you.

“what are you doing here i thought—” his surprised gaze shifted over to the way you were clutching onto him, and he relaxed, smiling a little.

“you grabbed me baby?”

“i—” you let him go and stepped back, your cheeks a vibrant pinky shade. “y—yeah…”

he turned around fully.

“why?”

“because—” you bit your bottom lip, peering cutely up at him.

“because i thought we were getting married…”

beetlejuice’s expression dropped and he stared at you wide eyed, his face reddening at your words.

“i don’t— i don’t understand—”

“what?” you giggled. “i thought you proposed to me earlier?”

“i did! yes i did!” he rapidly nodded. “but— but are you actually serious?”

you nodded. “mhm! i am!”

“you can say no sweets honestly it’s okay…”beetlejuice spoke softly with pinched brows. “i’ll cry myself to sleep and shrivel up but i can handle it don’t worry about me—”

you laughed and nudged his shoulder with yours. “i wanna marry you… i wanna set you free.”

you walked over to a little bench, the feeling of you stepping on rubber and glue a little weird under your feet as you sat down and smiled, gently patting the spot next to you.

“i’m not letting you stay here forever by yourself, not when you’ve been doing that already for years.” you murmured, him taking a seat next to you with a yearn-full but apprehensive face.

“you deserve to do the things you want to do and see the things you want to see…” you looked at him so sincerely and loving that he felt his undead heart throb. “… and if i can help you in anyway to get you there i don’t care what it is. i can’t think of anyone more deserving of freedom than you.”

“you’re so pure…” he softly took your hand, yours warm and pumping in comparison to his cold and stiff one. “you always have been.”

he stared at your hand still, his index finger delicately tracing over the faint markings of your working veins underneath your skin, trying to remember what they looked like on him when he was alive, and if they ever looked as precious as yours did.

beetlejuice raised your hand and kissed it, eliciting a fuzzy blush to your cheeks.

“i think we’re meant to be.”

you faltered slightly, for you felt a rush of deja vu hit you like a stifling wave.

“have we met?” you teasingly asked. “before you died?”

he laughed and shook his head.

you sat in comfortable silence for a moment, beetlejuice still tracing the lines and indentations of your hand before you spoke up again.

“i have a question.”

his content eyes switched to yours before they looked back down. “yes sweets?”

“is your name really beetlejuice?”

he weirdly stopped, and you quirked a brow.

“it’s…” he swallowed. “it’s not.”

“oh what the?” you paused, a little puzzled. “where did it come from?”

“juno.” he snickered. “the old hag said it fit how bizarre and stupid i was, so she put it in my contract.”

“oh my fucking god.” you mumbled. “why the hell would she do that? that’s cruel… you’ve already paid the price for what you did the least she could do is address you by your given name.”

beetlejuice laughed cutely, his eyes twinkling as he looked at you.

“that woman doesn’t care baby… so don’t sweat it.” he lifted a hand and ruffled your hair. “and if you ask me, she needs to retire immediately. like— yesterday. all she does is fucking nag at me and the rest of her damn clients.”

you giggled.

“so what’s your name then?”

“not important! now i say we figure out a way to get out of this rinky dink model—”

your eyes narrowed.

“why won’t you tell me your name?”

“—or maybe we should just stay and make ourselves at home!—”

“you won’t tell your soon to be wife your name?—”

“—oh! oh! i can manifest a little jacuzzi in the middle of the cemetery that’s neat—”

you slapped a hand over his mouth and he stopped, your pleading little eyes making him guiltily melt against your hold.

“your name.” you urged softly, lowering your hand and revealing a little frown that he had on his lips. “please.”

“i—” he blinked, utterly remorseful. “i can’t… i can’t tell you my name.”

your brows pinched. “why not? is part of your contract?”

“no— well yes.” he sighed deeply through his nose, and you wondered why he looked so… strained.

“it’s not their contract, but my contract… with you.”

you froze.

“with—” you struggled. “i don’t—”

he rubbed his tired sunken eyes.

“it’s okay sweets but that’s all you need to know—”

“no.” you replied firmly. “what i need to know is your name.”

he dropped his arms and shook his head desperately. “y/n please i put that contract on you to protect you if— if i tell you my name you’ll be hurt and i don’t want that—”

“what do you mean?” you bitterly scooched away from him on the bench and he stubbornly moved closer, eliminating the distance you had created.

“i lied when you asked me if we had met.”

your heart dropped.

“because we have… and i— i wanted you to forget me so i took away your memories and if i tell you my name—”

he swallowed hard.

“… it’ll break the contract. and you’ll remember me again.”

you stared at him, his regretful tortured gaze so anguishing that it was almost unbearable to watch him endure it, wanting to mend it instead, something that already felt so right and easy to you and in no way shape or form unfamiliar.

slowly, you reached up and cupped his cold cheeks in your hands, bringing his forehead to rest against yours.

“but i want to remember you…” you murmured. “…please let me.”

his pupils worriedly shook as they darted all around your striking features, his name practically hanging off the edge of his tongue but his throat physically unable to get the words out, for his dead heart was pulling and fighting with his vocal chords to prevent him from doing so, everything within him wanting to save you from memories he had to live with even after death.

but the other part of him was filled with such intense longing for you that it effortlessly slipped between the cracks of his defensive wall of not telling you his name…the relentless feeling going straight to his heart and mind and strangling the fuck out of it to get a formidable yes instead.

he wanted the life he once had. more than anything.

“satoru.”

something snapped in your brain and you flinched back, memories flooding through your mind faster than the speed of light as you recollected each and every moment in your existence, for the sentiment of vacancy and like a specific thing was just missing in your life was finally put back in its rightful place— for the thing that was missing in particular was him.

satoru gojo.

there were images of meeting him when you were both itty bitty in middle school under a magnolia tree, him sporadic and silly and making you laugh so hard on the third day of school that strawberry milk blew out of your nose and all over his clothes, satoru not having a care in the world as he cackled along with you and thought the way you made liquid come out of your nose was cool.

and there were images of the both of you becoming the best of friends— never one without the other as you pulled pranks on your teachers and ended up in detention together almost everyday, your parents utterly done with you as you never seemed to get it through your head how to behave, the both of you brushing off your scoldings and lectures because you had each other to endure all of it with.

and you saw how much he cared about you.

how he would physically fight and yell and reprimand anyone who called you a freak, anyone who spread rumors about you and your psychic medium abilities as he constantly reminded you everyday that your gift was sacred… a treasure while he wiped your tear stained cheeks and cheered you up after another day of your classmates poking fun at you, him saying that your skills were the coolest and how much he wished he was just like you, how much you both were meant to be as he loved ghost stories and scary stuff.

you saw how you fell in love too.

and it didn’t take long either, as your stolen glances and teasing turned into much more as soon as you grew and went to high school together, the both of you making it official literally your freshman year despite the apprehensions from your parents on both sides because of how young you were.

but it never proved to be an issue, you and satoru not once stumbling over a hiccup since the two of you had built such a strong foundation of genuine friendship and care before you blessedly fell in love, satoru throughout your years together absolutely smitten over you as he always passed you silly notes during class that had a gazillion hearts scribbled all across with your name in the middle, telling you all of the time just how much he loved and cherished you to the point where you had to funnily push him away from you to get him to stop smothering you, you always giving in anyways due to the fact that you were just as smitten, physically unable to go a day without him, and him still physically unable to not iterate how you were meant to be.

satoru understood you, satoru listened to you, and satoru believed you whenever you would speak on your psychic gift and how you had spoken casually to a spirit just the other day, him always interested and unbelievably amazed at everything you had to say as he bombarded you with fifty questions and begged you to teach him how to see spirits too.

he was respectful and supportive of you through it all.

especially when your parents died.

satoru wouldn’t leave your side. he refused to as you tried to piece together what the fuck had just happened, their accident so sudden and weird that it never made sense to you and still didn’t to this day.

and you grieved of course, cried and weeped and clung to satoru like a moth to a flame, feeling alone and without your biggest support system— without your loving peculiar parents that gave you your priceless gift in the first place, him accepting your tears with open arms as he encouraged you to let it all out and was worried for you when it seemed like you had moved on rather quickly from it.

but it was simply because your parents weren’t afraid of the afterlife. it was because your parents had talked so much about it and taught you everything that they knew, that you were convinced their souls peacefully made it through to the great beyond straight away and together, for you never saw their spirits roaming around aimlessly after and feeling eternally grateful for that, your whole life being about acknowledging and embracing the mysteries of life after death.

the knowledge of knowing they were at peace was enough to get you by for a little while.

satoru continued to check in on you about it though... even when it was the end of your junior year and nearing a year since their passing, his parents kindly taking you in after the ordeal and making satoru sleep on the floor and you taking over his bed since they didn’t have an extra room, satoru doing it without even needing to be told and you thanking all of them any chance you got for their amicable kindness and tried to pay them back, satoru checking in on you every night with a series of timid ‘are you okay’s’ and ‘are you happy’s’ before going to bed, your arm dangling off the edge so you could intertwine your fingers while you slept.

you were never alone like you thought you were. ever.

because of satoru.

and he made it obvious that he wanted to marry you too, that he wanted to have you for the rest of his life and didn’t give a single shit if you were both only 18 and barely starting college, him deeming it pointless for the both of you to pretend like the hope of marriage wasn’t there just for the sake of shutting up his parents, as every time he brought it up you stammered and blushed and fidgeted and he only giggled at you, telling you it would happen soon, to be ready, and to sit pretty and patient until the right time came.

except it never did.

because satoru gojo died a year later following that on halloween, precisely on his way over to your dorm when he was snatched by an unknown man and murdered in the middle of the night, you stuck wondering what had happened to him and why he wasn’t answering the phone when he was hours late to come get you, your chest on fire and aching as the feeling in your gut was weirdly excruciating, a part of you completely torn away and lost and you had no idea why until the very next morning.

and he had to watch you mourn. properly this time and not at all like the way you did for your parents, as this time it was fucking worse, painfully and all alone and for no way for him to get to you and comfort you— to tell you it was okay to cry and that he loved you, to tell you to be happy, to be hopeful for the future and hopeful to the thought of spending the rest of your lives together and being meant to be.

but instead he had to watch you wail and scream in your pillow every night with no saving, clutching his clothes and things and picture frames, you making yourself sick as the grief was too much to bare— everything that your parents had said to you and taught you about the afterlife meaning absolutely jack shit as the workings of supposed fate took away the only thing that ever made you happy.

satoru’s dream was to live with you. and it was taken away from him so brutally that he went absolutely nuts in the netherworld.

because yes he violated every single fucking undead law in the book and jumped over restricted gates and strange passage ways and doors, shoved through emotionless security guards, ignored juno’s warnings, and yes he tricked a living human being so he could exchange souls with him—

all for the sole purpose of getting back to you.

it was always for you.

and now, him sitting next to you with an anxious waiting expression, your body and mind now feeling the effects of not having seen him for three entire years and the way your conscious mind grieved for him and his return, his skin sickishly pale and cold but still so handsome nonetheless… absolutely broke you.

it broke you as you let out a strangled hiccup and covered your mouth tightly with both hands, eyes squeezing painfully shut as you reeled over and wailed with a broken heart, for you were mourning the loss of him all over again.

“baby no please—” he quickly caught you and brought you to his chest, his breathing erratic and with the biggest lump in his throat. “see? i didn’t want you to remember i— i wanted you to forget—

you continued to bawl and borderline scream out in agony, his words meaning absolutely nothing at this moment as your mind wouldn’t quit flashing painful memories through your mind, memories that were once entirely missing as they suffocated you with displays of satoru in his grave over and over and over again.

“i can’t—” he frantically looked around for something, anything that would make you feel better before looking back down. “look at me—”

“why did you leave?!” you wailed, pushing him away as the sight of you drowning in your tears ripped him to shreds. “why did you abandon me toru?! why did you—”

“i’m sor—” his voice gave out and he placed a hand over his heart, tears slipping from his eyes. “i’m sorry i’m so sorry i— i never wanted to leave—”

he reached out and tugged you in again, your body slumping against his as he struggled over his sobs.

“i didn’t want to die i tried so hard not to die—”

his words only made you cry harder as he gripped you tighter and shut his mouth, his frame trembling against yours and his tears trickling down and wetting your hair.

“you left me! you were supposed to come— hic— to come get me! you were supposed to marry me!—”

you were babbling mindlessly at this point, your shattered heart taking over the words that were tumbling out of your mouth as you gripped and clawed at his suit, trying to bury yourself in his skin and stay there where you belonged.

he was too cold. and you couldn’t hear a heart beat.

satoru could only cry and bawl with you as he gently rocked you side to side, knowing that there was nothing he could do to make you feel better, and nothing he could do to come back to life.

no matter how much he wanted it.

no matter how much you wanted it.

this is what fate had decided for the two of you.

“i tried so hard.” he mumbled. “i never stopped trying to get to you that’s why juno hates me so much because i’ve violated fucking everything.”

he pressed his lips to your forehead and laid his cheek on it after.

“i got sent to the attic and i couldn’t look after you anymore and i didn’t even get the chance to let you see me either—”

besides the fact that he took your memories, that explained why you never saw his spirit after he died, and you quickly pulled back again and narrowed your bloodshot eyes at him.

“why did you take my memories i never— hic!— i never asked you to i never wanted—”

“because i didn’t want you to grieve over me pretty…” he gently wiped your cheeks while you cried. “you were hurting so much and it was torture watching you suffer like that.”

you sniffled and wiped your eyes with the base of your palm.

“i wanted to see you happy…” satoru finished off.

“was i?”

he dropped his hands and frowned.

“were you?”

“no!” you muttered. “my entire life i’ve felt like something was missing and i didn’t know why… like this— this block in my brain that i couldn’t figure out and it was always just empty and like something was supposed to be there.”

you tucked your hair behind your ear and solemnly looked down, a pulsing headache racking through you from how much you were crying.

“i had to live with the fact that i was alone and that i never had anyone… and i had accepted that too… only this entire time i did have someone. you.”

and oddly enough, through everything that happened— all of the memories that you now remembered and the devastating death of your late boyfriend, you finally felt a little bit less strange and unusual.

because you always thought that something was wrong with you for feeling the way that you did, for craving something— someone that never existed, for wanting to fill the void that you now know satoru once happily sat in, all of these things now officially clicking into place and bringing you the weirdest sense of peace you had probably ever felt.

“i wish you never made me forget.” you mumbled. “you’re worth remembering toru…. even if it hurts me.”

he guiltily nodded and sniffed. “m’sorry… i thought you were better off forgetting.”

a part of him still does, because the small glimpses he caught of you no longer crying and just simply living after he took your memories away, was enough to bring him a tiny sense of relief just before he got banished to the attic, hopeful that you would live a long and happy life even if it was painfully without him.

but the minute he sensed you coming up to the house earlier that night with him thinking he was going absolutely insane and if it was truly you, was also enough to send all of that out the fucking window and falling back into a pit of despair and longing for you when he finally saw you again— for the first time in three years, looking just as pretty as he remembered and a little more grown up.

you slowly shook your head side to side, lifting your arms to wrap around his neck and him immediately responding, snaking them around your waist and pulling your warm beating body flush against his chest.

“do you still love me?” he murmured. “even though i’m dead?”

you slightly snorted, softly kissing his cheek.

“i’ll always love you toru. wherever you are.”

“i’ll always love you.”

he pulled back and gently smiled, eyes flickering to your soft lips as he juggled in his mind if it was okay to kiss you, every fiber of his undead being begging for it after missing and wishing it for so long, left with only recollections of your kisses to suffice through the years that he spent without you and wondering if he still had the right to— since even though you were once his, and he shamelessly still considered you his, he didn’t know if you were on the same page.

but you were.

it would be stupid not to be.

you leaned your pretty little face closer to his, timid doe eyed gaze looking at him so fondly that it brought back that same familiar feeling he felt with you those years ago, his hands coming up and settling themselves on your warm lively cheeks, holding you like fragile porcelain.

but were his dead lips still worthy of yours? even after everything he’d done?

“toru.”

he hummed.

“do you remember our first kiss?”

“uh huh.” he breathed out softly. “it was in my room.”

“i think—” your nose brushed with his. “i think we should have our second first kiss.”

he bit his bottom lip and smiled.

“you think so?”

“i do.”

he hummed again, his thumb gently grazing over your plushy lips.

“i think it should look a little more like the first time.”

he tilted his head to the side a tiny bit and a delicate gust of wind brushed through your hair, your surroundings now completely and miraculously morphed into his room with the both of you sitting on his bed— just like how you remembered it and basically had grown up in as you slowly took in your surroundings.

“how the fuck—”

he laughed a little, lifting one hand and keeping the other still on your cheek, his index finger lightly tapping the center of your forehead.

“mind manipulation pretty.” he grinned. “cool huh? i poked in your head again.”

“yeah!” you giggled. “very cool.”

“you know what else would be cool?”

“what?”

“if you gave me a little kiss.”

you tilted your head to the side and leaned in again, your breath fanning across his face and your lips so close but not quite that it was fucking excruciating.

“you want a kiss toru?”

“uh huh.”

“how bad— mmph!—”

satoru didn’t even let you finish that sentence as he stuffed his tongue in your mouth greedily, wet and messy kisses smacking through the room as he cradled your jaw, cold lips delving all over yours and him giddy over the sensation of your warm mouth in comparison to his, your hands clutching his blazer and making out so sensually as you made up for the time that was stolen from you.

and the only thing the two of you felt in each others arms then was serenity— one pumping, working heart and the other stiff, unmoving and cold, still equally beating for one another even through the restrictions of death, for satoru’s heart continued to move and love you regardless of how lifeless it may have appeared.

he suddenly pulled away, breathless.

“sweets?”

“yeah?”

“where in the actual fuck did you meet rin?”

you laughed, pulling back a bit to look at him with a regretful look. “knowing what i know now, i’m sick to my stomach toru.”

“did you meet him after i died?”

you nodded. “he was in one of my literature classes… and since back then i only remembered living my life— alone, i guess he was the first person that didn’t make me feel that way. at the start.”

“lame.” he mumbled. “you cheated on me sweets.”

“no!” you laughed again, giving him a little pout. “he was awful. horrendous. and i only stayed because i didn’t wanna be alone again… even though i shouldn’t have.”

you leaned and gave him a soft tiny lingering peck.

“did you love him?” he murmured against your lips, and you shook your head.

“remembering you again made me realize what being in love with someone was supposed to feel like.” you reached and brushed through the front stands of his white hair mindlessly. “and it was no where near what i felt for rin. i didn’t feel anything for him actually.”

he pursed his lips to the side, eyes squinting in thought and distaste.

“hmmm…”

you giggled. “what toru?”

he hated that you got associated with a guy like that, and hated even more that rin was kissing and hugging and touching you whenever the fuck he wanted when you were his first.

“i’m gonna haunt him for the rest of his life.”

you playfully rolled your eyes and nudged him. “honestly? do it. he sucks.”

“and you know what else sweets?”

you quirked a little brow. “what?”

“i’m gonna make you forget!”

“toru!” you giggled. “no more taking memor—“

satoru leaned his face closer to yours and you froze up, wide eyed as a little mischevious glint in his vibrant blue gaze made you fidget.

he slowly grinned and tilted his head, lips coming closer to the side of your ear and tantalizingly hovering, arms snaking around your torso and pulling you up against him.

“did you let him touch you pretty?”

“t—touch?—”

“mhm.” he gripped you a little tighter. “did you?”

“um.” you squirmed a bit, your body turning hot in the matter of seconds. “what— what do you mean—”

“did you let him fuck you.”

your breath hitched and your cheeks went pink, hands timidly resting flat on his chest and feeling a little… guilty.

“maybe—” you paused, shaky breaths blowing through your nose. “maybe once—”

satoru shot up to stand and hauled you with him, a squeal slipping past your lips as he hiked you up and brought your legs around his waist, walking across the room in quick strides and plopping you down roughly on his desk, kicking away his chair and it slamming against the wall as it rolled back.

“toru?—”

“why can’t i make you forget… hm?” he grazed his lips from your jaw and up the side of your cheek, feather like as he squeezed and kneaded at your thighs, your heart fucking hammering against your chest.

“why would you wanna remember being with someone else other than me baby…”

“i— i don’t but you erased my memories—”

he pulled back and tutted, head shaking and fingers drumming against your thighs. “doesn’t matter! should’ve avoided them like the plague silly.”

you giggled and wrapped your arms around his neck, tugging him gently in.

“i would’ve if i remembered.”

“remember this remember that—” he smiled brightly and brought his face close to yours once more.

“y’know what?” he cutely pecked your lips. “i’m gonna help you remember something!”

your brows pinched momentarily in curiosity. “what?”

“that i’m the only man that ever gets to fuck you.”

satoru smashed his lips against yours and pulled you in tight, the bulge in his dress pants abundantly obvious as he grinded and rutted his aching cock on your clothed pussy, you gasping in his mouth at the feeling as you tried to keep up with his feverish fast kisses.

he slipped his icy hands underneath your top and you jumped at the change in temperature, satoru ravishing you up and obsessed with the heat your body produced and radiated, leaving him toasty for once and bringing a faux sense of life to him.

“did you forget that too?” he murmured against your lips, hands ever so slowly creeping up and sliding under your bra to grope your plump tits. “how i feel?”

“nuh uh.” you breathed out. “i didn’t—”

“tell me what you remember then sweets…”

he slid his hands back down and hiked your skirt up, you lifting your hips a little to help him bring it up as high as he possibly could, your pretty little panties tight and suffocating your pussy as his fingers came down to play with your swollen needy clit.

“i remember—” your mouth hung open, words lodging in your throat.

“hm?” he shoved his hand in your panties and your eyes fluttered closed, him placing open wet mouthed kisses all over your neck and chest, your mind unable to grasp the amount of pleasure he was getting out with simply just his fingers, pleasure you missed so fucking badly as he slipped his digits up and down your folds.

“your dick—” satoru pushed two fingers inside of you and you whined. “i remember the way you felt.”

“yeah?” he pulled back from your chest and grinned, fingers squelching as they pumped in and out. “and how did i feel?”

“big.” you choked out, legs spreading wider as you gripped the edge of his desk, his frenzied lust filled eyes drinking in the way you unraveled and crumbled before him.

something he was positive rin didn’t even come fucking close to.

“aww.” he cooed, digits speeding up as you squealed and tried to close your legs, him prying them open again. “bet you missed the way i filled you full huh? stretched you out so good?”

you rapidly nodded, eyebrows contorted in ecstasy as your thighs shook.

“anything else you missed baby?”

arousal trickled down your folds at this point, making an absolute mess out of his fingers.

“your hands— heave— on my neck when you’d fuck me—”

a shiver ran down his spine at your words, his cock so fucking hard and aching as it begged him to let it spring free and bury itself in your hole.

“my god…” he whispered. “i bet your slutty little self wants me to fuck you right now right? stuff you up and make you cum on my dick like i used to?”

with each word your hole was clenching and screaming for his cock, your hands quickly shooting out to pull and unbuckle at his belt, him laughing as he continued to finger your pussy while loosening up the collar of his tie.

“you’re so needy.”

you pouted, embarrassed as you pulled your hands away and brattily tugged at his wrist to take his fingers out.

“i take it back—”

“no!” he quickly yanked his belt off and flung it, his fingers unzipping his pants and taking out his solid dick. “hell no please i need to be inside you—“

he lined his cock up and without warning pushed, your hands flying to grip his shoulders for support and crying out at the mere size of him, his dick icy in between your gummy walls that somehow added a whole new wave of pleasure for you.

“hard toru.” you whined. “please i can’t— i—”

“i know baby i know.” he gripped your hips and snapped his hips up, your moans fueling him as he plunged in your hole and took no time in fucking you in just the way he knew you liked it, proud of the fact that your pussy still took every single inch of him like he’d trained you— almost like she recognized whose dick was actually for you and not some other fucking morons.

“you’re not screwing anybody else anymore, you hear me sweets?” he tapped your cheek to get you to look at him, you completely dazed and fucked out as you tried to hold eye contact with him amidst his drilling cock. “should’ve only been me… living or dead i don’t care.”

you nodded dumbly, you leaning and kissing him sloppily and desperately that you muffled his next words, refusing to detach from his mouth.

“did you— mmph— let him cum inside?”

you didn’t answer, not because you were afraid to, but because his dick was silencing you as you hiccuped and spasmed with every slam of his hips, satoru a horny goner and pinning everything all on you even when it was literally his fault he erased your memories in the first place, fuming over the thought of you tainted by another man that he wanted to perform a full fucking cleanse.

he rammed inside of you faster against the desk as you separated from his lips and clamped a hand over your mouth, eyes rolling to the back of your head.

“don’t tell me you let him cum inside you little slut—”

“i didn’t!” you heaved. “i didn’t i didn’t—”

“good baby!” he cheered, a complete contrast to his menacing tone from seconds before. “so you do love me.”

“i do! i love you i love you i love yo—”

his unbeating heart soared.

“you love me?”

“uh— hic!— uh huh—“

“even when i’m dead?”

you nodded vigorously, feeling your orgasm starting to bubble up in your tummy as you choked and squirmed.

“perfect my sweet little thing…” he cooed once more, him literally lightheaded over the way you clenched around his cock. “make a mess all over me baby i’ve been dreaming of your cute cunt for three fucking years—”

you wrapped your arms around him by the neck again and moaned, burying your face in his neck as he placed two palms on your bent knees and spread your plushy thighs further apart, jack hammering you and so mean about it as you shook violently against him and came, heaves and sobs of pleasure racking through your body as he threw his head back and groaned.

“you want me to cum inside you?” he asked. “fill you up just like i used to?”

“yes! please please—”

“oh fucking well.”

he pulled out of you and your eyes bulged open, his dick shiny and covered in your juices as he grabbed your upper arm and yanked you down on your knees.

“you’re gonna suck me off and swallow what i give you for letting rin’s filthy hands on you.”

satoru tapped his dick against your cheek to get you to open up, you listening and opening your mouth as he shoved his cock inside and placed a hand on the back of your head, fucking your mouth as you choked and gagged on his length and loving every second of it.

“goooddd baby.” he whispered, your slobbering so nasty as he watched drool dribble down your chin. “so good…”

you gulped him down and lathered your tongue around while he used you, his balls swollen and twitching and him needing to dump his cum in your mouth for you to swallow.

“remember when we used to do this every night?” he smiled wickedly. “when i’d make you swallow me up?”

you hummed around him and tried to nod, eager for his release and wanting to show him that you in fact did remember— wanting it just as bad as you hollowed out your cheeks and sucked him harder.

“h— oh my god—” he fisted your hair and shivered, letting you take over and milk him for all his worth. “i’m gonna— jesus baby slow— slow down slow down— hah!”

satoru’s release shot to the back of your throat and you choked, blinking back tears as you gradually slowed your pace and continued to deliciously suck him through his orgasm and gulp down his cum, him with a death grip on the edge of his desk as he heaved and swallowed, hips jittery and twitching away from you— tip now overly sensitive.

you licked up the last of his cum and stood back up, shimming your skirt back down and satoru shakily stuffing his softened dick back in his pants and zipping it, eyes softening once you reached up and wrapped your arms around his shoulders, his over your waist and squeezing you gently.

“so you’re telling me.” you began. “that you haven’t had sex in three years and you fucked me like that?”

he snickered and smoothed a hand over your back. “it’s my instinct sweets! and also because i’m sure rin did a horrendous freaking job—”

you laughed and rolled your eyes, kissing his cheek before looking at him fully.

“i’m serious you know.”

he raised a brow. “about what?”

“about marrying you. even more so now.”

and just when he was about to pick you up and spin you around and jump up and down, he stilled— face sickishly paling more than it already was.

because satoru was keeping something else from you… a condition between the living and the dead and one he overlooked entirely because he was selfishly desperate for you and just wanted you with him again, like the way he had you when he was alive.

“what toru?”

“huh?” his eyes snapped to yours, and he quickly shook his head. “oh nothing nothing!”

his mind was frantically pushing it to the back, ignoring it and wanting to go through with the one thing he’d practically been dreaming of his entire living and dead life— marriage with you.

this was fine. this was okay.

right?

“white or black.”

you tilted your head. “what?”

“you’ll see… but choose!” he grinned. “white or black?”

a slow giddy smile grew on your face.

“black.”

satoru waved his hand and you stilled, the clothes on your skin changing and morphing into something completely anew, your eyes landing on his black and white button up suit now and head quickly dropping down to yourself— gasping once it registered in your flabbergasted brain.

you were wearing a black wedding gown, beautiful and classy as you picked up and felt the soft silk material between your fingertips, your tule sheer veil intricate as you looked behind you then— it long and stretching for what seemed like miles across the floor with gorgeous embroidery at the base of it.

it was heavenly.

your gaze snapped back to his, and he smiled fondly, taking your hand and intertwining your fingers.

“three times.” he murmured, and you picked up on what he was referring to, tightening your grip on his hand and nodding.

“beetlejuice beetlejuice beetlejuice.”

and the room spun around you, so astronomically fast that you almost doubled over in stifling nausea as the wind whipped through your hair and veil, expecting to land in the attic and finally outside that damn model when in reality, you were in a church cathedral as soon as your surroundings had stopped spinning… and one that looked exactly like the one in winter river.

“are we…” you looked around. “are we still in the model?”

he shook his head. “nope! i was focusing my mind here when you were saying my name… we’re in winter river baby.”

you smiled, the atmosphere around you soft and serene as the dimly lit candles around you quietly flickered, a random lilac colored hue across the cathedral and one you assumed was placed by satoru himself as he took your hands in his, almost in a haste too, but choosing to brush the observation aside.

this was wrong… and satoru knew it.

but he pushed it to the back of his head again.

“we are gathered here today—”

“shit!”

you jumped and whipped your head to the side, breathing out and shoulders relaxing once you saw it was just your church’s pastor that you’d known since birth— a strange far off look in his eye that you deemed to be something that satoru did, for there was no way he was up at the crack of fucking dawn right now to do a wedding.

“sorry!” you laughed. “is he… is he okay?”

“oh yeah he’s fine! he’s actually still sleeping.” he let go of one of your hands and patted the pastors head. “i’m manipulating his head for a little bit. just until you’re my wife.”

his wife.

you nodded, cheeks so warm as you tried to refrain from jumping over how excited you were at the thought of finally fulfilling the vows you had placed on each other when you were young— them now nurturing into something real.

“dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to witness and celebrate the love of satoru gojo and y/n y/m in holy matrimony.”

he shouldn’t do this to you.

“today, they declare their intention to build a life together, sharing their joys and their challenges, and supporting one another in pursuit of their dreams.”

he can’t— he can’t build a life with you… can he?

he pushed his worries back again and gripped your hands tighter.

“do you, satoru gojo, take y/n y/m to be your lawfully wedded wife? do you promise to love, honor, cherish and protect her, through sickness and in health for as long as you both shall live?”

this is wrong.

but he swallowed the lump in his throat and nodded.

“i do.”

“and do you, y/n y/m, take satoru gojo to be your lawfully wedded husband? do you promise to love, honor, cherish and protect him, through sickness and in health for as long as you both shall live?”

for as long as you both shall live.

satoru can’t live.

“i d—”

“stop.”

you froze.

“what?” you asked worriedly. “what’s wrong?”

“i’m no better than the man i was when i first died.”

the look in his eyes was… odd, and it only further confused you.

“i don’t—”

“i can’t let you marry me baby.”

your heart dropped.

“what?”

“i told you that if you married me it would break my contract and i would be a free man and that’s true…” he began. “but there’s something else that i didn’t tell you... i— i kept it from you.”

oh fuck.

“what are you talking about toru.” your voice was low and heedful, almost like a warning to him, and he wanted to slam his head against the wall for being so fucking reckless again.

“if you—” he breathed in and shook his head, letting go of your hands and letting his fall tight at his sides, balling up. “if you marry me, you’re freeing me…”

he gnawed at his lip.

“but i’m killing you.”

your blood ran cold and drained from your face, words entirely at a loss and useless as your brain tried to process what the fuck he just told you.

kill you?

“marrying me is like exchanging your soul with the dead.” satoru slowly shook his head. “you’ll die sweets… i can’t— i can’t do that to you.”

satoru was desperate to for you, so much so that he was willing to hide such a detrimental part of the marriage clause until the time came, choosing to play freaking stupid and tune it out in the hopes that in the end, he would be brave enough to go through with it just to keep you and not ever have to say goodbye again.

but it was wrong. so incredibly immoral and wrong and he felt like a monster for even trying to do it, for letting it go as far as it did and have you standing there in front of him in your pretty gown and veil— just like how he’d imagined it when his blood was pumping and his heart was beating, and just like how he’d imagined it even now, shriveled up dead veins and all.

this is what fate had chosen for the two of you.

and though it took forever for satoru to accept it… you and him were simply not meant to be.

for you were meant to live, and satoru was meant to die.

“you disgraceful bafoon! you insolent crook!”

the big doors of the cathedral kicked open and juno walked through, adam and barbara maitland running behind her and trying to pull her back, the both of them spouting reasonings and explanations.

“this is her choice juno!—”

“she wants to let her do it!—”

“the kid’s just in love!—”

“button it or i’m sending you back to the house!” juno grumbled at them, turning back around and pointing menacingly at satoru once she reached you both, her brittle old lady perfume wafting in your nostrils.

“juno!” satoru greeted with faux cheerfulness, eyes wide and alarmed. “good to see you hah! you look livelier than the last time i saw y—”

“what the hell do you think you’re doing boy?” she spat, eyes switching to you next. “and you! young lady— this man is a spirit!”

“i—i know—”

“juno they know each other.” barbara spoke up gently. “they grew up together when he was alive.”

“yes they were in a relationship this isn’t him trying to trick her into anything—”

“no but it is.” satoru exhaustedly whined, cutting adam off as he ran his hands through his snowy hair. “she didn’t know about the clause… i just told her now.”

silence.

“you didn’t tell her about the clause?!—”

“are you out of your mind you cockroach?!—”

“you’re doing what you did before!—”

“i know!” satoru exclaimed over the yells of scolding and belittlement. “i know i know that’s why i told her just now… i’m not letting her do it i— i couldn’t.”

he turned to you.

“baby i want you. i need you and that’s why i didn’t say anything like a fucking dingbat because i’m tired of living forever without you... it sucks.”

you felt tears prickle at your eyes.

“but this isn’t fair to you at all. you deserve to live man… i can’t— i won’t drag you down with me.”

“toru—”

“the living and the dead were never meant to coexist.” juno interjected, her gaze looking at satoru sincerely for once that it was a strange sight for him.

she placed a hand on her chest. “i’m sorry that your love was separated by death, truly. i sympathize with you. i can’t think of anything more cruel.”

you both solemnly nodded.

“but the living and the dead were never meant to coexist.” she repeated. “so even though you two move on from this and go back to being what you are, satoru will stay like this and you will not. you will grow.”

juno addressed you directly and you listened with a heavy heart— the use of satoru’s actual given name now from her instead of ‘beetlejuice’ adding a layer of somber seriousness.

“and let’s just say this clause didn’t exist and you get to marry her and she stays alive… satoru will still stay and you will grow. do you both understand what i’m trying to say?”

you quickly wiped the corner of your eyes, satoru peeking over at you sadly.

“i won’t tell you what i think the right choice is young lady.” she continued. “the dead aren’t even supposed to associate with the living like this… but weigh the consequences of either path and see which one you want to walk in.”

she stepped a bit closer, holding eye contact with you.

“but let me make one thing clear— the power of the living is greater than the dead. if you choose to marry him, you will break his contract forever and free him of his violations. but if you do, you will die and be one of us.”

either path is difficult.

to sacrifice his freedom, or to sacrifice your life?

but you knew that a life without satoru was nothing and bleak…. you had lived it for three years.

were you willing to return to that? just to keep your heart beating? and say goodbye to satoru for good?

you didn’t want to live in a world that didn’t have him in it. you didn’t want to live in a world where you remembered satoru for longer than you’d known him, and the thought only made you absolutely sick to your stomach as you envisioned the rest of your life without the person who knew you best.

it was almost easy… you didn’t have to weigh the consequences at all.

your path was satoru.

“we’re getting married.”

“what?!” satoru frantically shook his head. “no sweets no we’re not.”

“yes we are.” you pushed. “this isn’t for you to decide it’s my choice and i choose you—”

“and i’m not letting you.” he countered. “you’re choosing wrong so unbelievably wrong—”

“but i’m not though!” you argued. “literally explain to me right now how me stuck in a world that doesn’t have you in it is better than—”

“y/n you need to live.” he cut you off. “i died, not you it’s not supposed to be you alright? i can’t let you do this.”

tears slipped from your eyes and you wiped them right away.

“do you not— sniff— do you not want me do you want me to go away what—”

“no…” he stepped forward and cupped your cheeks. “that’s the last thing i want and you know that…”

“then why won’t you marry me?” you hiccuped. “why won’t you let me stay with you?”

“baby— life is so unbelievably precious.” he moved strands of your hair away from your face. “do you have any idea what i would give to have it again? to feel my body actually working for a change instead of it just being nothing?”

you continued to cry, your hands clutching his wrists.

“i don’t want you to take that away from yourself because of me… i want you breathing. i want your little heart pumping and your cheeks warm, i want you to move on.”

“i— hic!— i don’t want to move on from you—”

“you have to sweets.” he quickly wiped his eyes before cupping your cheeks again. “we’re not meant to be baby and i hate so much that we aren’t… and i’m sorry.”

“toru stop it—”

“please live for me okay? for the both of us. and don’t forget me either please don’t forget me—”

“why are you—” you harshly wiped your eyes. “why are you talking like that what are you doing—”

“i don’t think i should be around you anymore baby.”

“huh?!” your eyes narrowed. “are you serious?”

“satoru—”

juno raised a hand, stopping barbara from interjecting.

“it won’t be good for either of us if i stick around...” he sniffled. “i need to stay away from you because if i don’t, i might try to trick you again into giving up your soul and i can’t have that.”

“my soul?” you spat. “take it i don’t want it without you i told you already—”

“please try to understand.” he placed a soft kiss to your forehead. “please.”

“no—”

“i’ll see you soon okay?” satoru let go of your face. “graduate please. have kids and get married and stuff… travel.”

you were supposed to do all of that with him.

“satoru no listen to me!—”

“i love you.”

“stop!—”

satoru’s grief was monumental, but his love for you was greater, choosing to let you go for the sake of your life.

he looked to juno and she sighed through her nose, somehow knowing exactly what he was silently asking for, stepping forward and lifting a hand.

“satoru please i wanna stay with you!—”

juno sharply moved her hand to the side and you were pulled to a blinding white abyss, dream like and fuzzy as you felt all muscles in your body relax, your mind completely blank and free of the heartbreak and loss and sorrow for a little, floating through a cloud of soft serenity as it brought you in and tried to clear the pain in your heart.

you weren’t aware of where you were or what juno had done, but your thoughts were distant and muffled as you let it engulf you entirely in its welcoming arms, you sleepy and drowsy until the blinding white abyss slowly shrunk down to a pure black, quiet void, the nerves in your body twitching little by little until you were finally consciously aware of your limbs and mind, but you too tired still to open your eyes.

you cruelly dreamed of satoru still. of him alive.

and you weren’t sure how long you had been in this weird pit of tranquility, or how long you were asleep for until you were jerked awake and ripped from it entirely.

“hey— y/n?”

you shot awake, sitting up and whipping your head around.

you were back in your dorm.

“are you okay? why are you sleeping on the floor?”

you looked up, your roommate standing there with a weirded out expression.

“and what are you wearing?”

your gaze shifted downward, and the minute you saw your black wedding dress and veil folded neatly next to you, memories of what had happened hours prior came achingly flooding in as you scrambled to stand up on your feet, scaring your roommate and leaving her to grumble in her head about how she wished the system didn’t put her to room with the campus ghost girl.

“sorry! i have to go thank you though for waking me u—”

your voice trailed off down the hall, you running through and ignoring the weirded out looks from other students as you sprinted out of the building and down the street, engulfing the skirt of your gown up in your arms so you wouldn’t accidentally trip over it and eat shit on the ground, the goal of getting back to the maitland’s house the only thing on your mind as you ran.

your lungs burned by the time you got to the bottom of the hill, and you thanked anyone that was willing to listen for allowing winter river to exist as the smallest town you had ever known, sparing you from running a full fledged marathon just to get to the house as you heaved and tried to catch your breath, a little sweaty and hot as you began the hike up the hill.

you hoped he was there.. in the attic.

you hoped to god that he was.

reaching the top, you continued to trudge across the dirt driveway and up the porch steps, your foot lifting and just about to make contact with the old wooden platform until an invisible force grabbed your ankle and pulled you back, literally dragging you away from the house and down the hill over the grass as you screamed and thrashed for it to let you go.

satoru.

and you tried again, hiking up the hill with your bundled up wedding skirt in your arms, reaching the top faster than last time and choosing to run up the porch steps instead to see if you could outrun his ghostly abilities.

except you couldn’t, because the invisible force caught you by the ankle again just as your fingers grazed the doorknob, yanking you away and down the hill until it left you screaming and huffing in frustration at the bottom.

you continued to do that for the rest of the fucking day, and everyday for that matter, for an entire week straight.

walking up the hill, reaching the top, getting reeled back, running up the hill and getting sent back down again, sprinting for it only to get dragged away once more as the repeated cycle you had set for yourself happened over and over, until by your last attempt you couldn’t even walk up the hill anymore, satoru having put a huge invisible wall around the house that was impossible to get through.

you were angry. angry and bitter that he was doing this.

was it so bad to just want to spend the rest of your undying life with him? is that not what he wanted this entire time? why was he so adamant on damning you to live a life of suffering and— and loneliness? a life without him?

you didn’t know what to do. your psychic abilities were only for sensing the dead and being able to see them— nothing to do with calling forth spirits or summoning them at any given place and time, so there was no way for you to call satoru no matter how much you wanted to or tried.

and you cried. you cried and you sobbed just like how you did when he first died, except somehow worse knowing that there was a chance to be together with him forever and him not wanting it… not wanting you.

but you waited anyways, hoping that he would come around and change his mind, that he would bring down that stupid invisible wall and let you inside the house and back to him, counting down the days and hours and minutes until it became clearer to you that satoru wasn’t going to change his mind.

and by the third week, you had almost entirely given up.

you felt nothing. absolutely nothing as you slugged through your classes or your day to day errands, not giving a shit about anything that you had to do in this world for you had always loved the other world more— the world of spirits and the netherworld and the great beyond, the world that had satoru in it, as you appreciated and admired that one more ever since you were a kid with your parents… more than the one you were currently in— as this one was filled with ignorance and criticism.

you felt helpless… and maybe satoru was right.

if he was willing to give up an opportunity to keep you forever, then maybe that’s just the way it goes… maybe you should just accept it, and you choosing to think of the latter instead of begging and kneeling at nothing for satoru to come back and get you and marry you— was helping the bitterness in your heart grow and get you by, it at least stopping you from crying in the middle of your lectures or the grocery store and weirding people out anyways.

maybe you should accept the fact that you and him were not meant to be.

after an entire month, you had given up.

and satoru’s grave was the closest you knew you’d get to him, permanently divided by dirt and soil and grass… six feet under and totally out of your reach, his tombstone engraved and pretty and one you couldn’t believe you had forgotten about as it sat here alone for years right under your nose— you visiting it now for the millionth time as you placed your book bag down and sat criss crossed on the grass, mindlessly tugging and breaking off pieces of it as you sat there.

you sighed deeply and hugged your knees up to your chest, the day surprisingly a sunny one as chirping birds flittered past you through the wind, tiny little white butterflies occasionally stopping by to sit on your arm or satoru’s tombstone as you sat there in thought… not really sure what to think, but comforted by the fact that the engravings on his stone reminded you that he was once very much alive and real.

there was an odd wavering in your heart, and you had a feeling that this was going to be the last time you were visiting his grave, for you figured it was time to finally do what he wanted you to do— move on and forget him.

“don’t move on.”

you stiffened.

that voice… was your mind hallucinating now? jesus chri—

“don’t move on from me please… and— and don’t forget me. i take it all back.”

you heard footsteps draw nearer across the grass and you turned your head, eyes widening and unbelieving as you saw satoru standing there with a pleading anxious expression, him still dressed in his black and white suit that he had on for the wedding.

was it actually him?

“how are you…” you trailed off, your mind having difficulty processing how he was there. “how are you outside the house? i thought the contract—”

“juno gave me a hall pass…” he explained softly. “it expires at the end of the day.”

you hummed, itching to jump up and wrap your arms around him and cling to him, but stopping yourself from doing so as you still didn’t know why he was here, and you were quite frankly still bitter and hurt from him sending you away.

you slightly turned your body. “why are you here?”

“because i can’t stay away from you.”

your heart skipped a beat as he crouched down to your level, your eyes greedily running across every feature of his face and committing it to memory, as you now had him directly in front of you again instead of having to rely on recollections of him to try and mend your aching heart.

and satoru was doing the same.

“i started to sense you distancing from me and… and i had this feeling that you were starting to listen and move on and forget me and it made me fucking ill. which is crazy because i’m dead… but i was literally ill sweets.”

you let a tiny soft smile play at your lips.

“i can’t take it.” he spoke again, shaking his head. “i can’t take the thought of you forgetting me. not now, not ever, and i don’t know why i was stupid enough to try and convince myself that i could watch you do something like that even if its the right thing.”

“you sent me away.”

“i did baby…” he reached over and gently caressed your cheek. “and i regret that so fucking much. i’m sorry.”

“toru i need you to understand that you can’t make choices like that for me.”

“i know.” he mumbled and dropped his hand, eyes casting down. “i’m stupid.”

“but i also need you to understand, that i have no interest in living in a world that doesn’t have you in it… it’s not worth it now that you’re gone.”

you tilted your head to try and catch his gaze, continuing once his blue eyes flickered back to yours.

“i would die for you, and i would die without you. i look for you in everything that i do and you expecting me to just forget you is cruel.”

“no i don’t want you to forget me anym—”

“what’s life to you?” you asked him suddenly. “what does it feel to you? and mean?”

he stared at you with pinched brows, his face endearing but sad all at the same time.

“warm.” he murmured. “beautiful and… pure. it’s peaceful and it means you.”

your heart fluttered and you smiled, and satoru fell in love with you all over again— something you conquered when he was alive, and something you conquered again in death.

“that’s what life is toru.” you cupped his cheek. “to me it’s not— this.”

you gestured around you. “it’s not my body or my heart, it’s not the sun and it’s not breathing. it’s you. i feel life through you and i always have… because life doesn’t literally mean where i am now and neither does it mean the netherworld baby… it means you and me.”

satoru didn’t even realize he was crying until you wiped his cheeks, your words serving an entirely new perspective to him about the living and the dead and he felt peace.

because yes satoru was dead… but he was still living. living because he had you as the embodiment of it, and living because his soul still permitted him to see you again and be with you, to look at you with his own undead eyes and feel warmth like he did before.

but not literal warmth from your body or pumping blood or a beating heart.

but warmth from your soul. from who you are.

that’s what life was to him… and what life was to you.

satoru wrapped his arms around your shoulders and brought you to his chest, one hand on the back of your head as he cradled you and cried, finally now no longer mourning his past life like he’d been doing for the past three years, and no longer wishing for it back either or thinking that physically living in this world was the better option for you just because it meant you were breathing.

where he was, was just fine. and wherever you chose to go would be fine too.

but you chose to go with him, something that had been set since the moment you met under the magnolia tree back in middle school— living or dead, paris or italy, your choice would always and forever be him.

satoru proposed to you right then and there at his gravesite, flying to one knee as soon as you both stood back up and him manifesting the biggest diamond rock you had ever seen in your life, laughing and crying together as he slipped it over your ring finger, for your marriage meant the binding of the living and the dead, and the binding of you and him— a new beginning.

but this time your wedding wasn’t at the cathedral, but under the pretty magnolia tree where you had met, now accompanied by the maitlands as barbara cried, and juno as she herself officiated the wedding, you thinking— hoping that she grew a soft spot for satoru, and that behind her stern resting face, she was glad satoru was finally a free man and granted a second chance.

giving your soul up was nothing to you, and it didn’t hurt at all either… you feeling lighter in exchange actually… happy, with satoru standing in front of you and with a massive fucking grin on his face, shiny and bright as he practically jumped in his spot in excitement over you finally being his wife and that he got to keep you— and right this time… no lies or tricks or hidden secrets, but genuine authentic sacrifice instead, for it was the purest form of love.

because this is what fate had decided for the two of you.

it had decided that satoru gojo was meant to die… but it had also decided to bring you back to him as well— to the house of the maitlands, to the attic he was banished to, and back together again in each others cold arms where you belonged, defying the laws of the living and the dead and proving that life doesn’t end even after your hearts stopped beating.

fate had decided that you were both meant to be. that was always a fact.

and fate had decided that you and satoru gojo were meant to live, with unbeating hearts and icy cold skin, but souls still warm for each other nonetheless.

because through sickness and in health… death could not do you both apart.

you and satoru.

together for eternity.

a lovely and incredibly beautiful fanart of this fic can be found here by @courtneedsleep !! <33

taglist!! <33 (THANK YOU THANK YOU!):

@cupcaketeddybehr @soobiary @roachfun @waterfal-ling @saebaey @reneinii @luvvmae @cake-with-the-cream @pixie-dix @2ukika @cramelmacchiao @hy3phiren @fushigurioo @wil10wthetree @jameinfrau @pancakeszs @drftnzume @k0z3me @saelov3 @dindjarins1ut @starrnai @stilettoheelz @tinyray-lovesfood @iloveoldermenn @dazqa @applepi25 @aria-chikage @rose-tinted-kalopsia @runfrme @unofficialsapphire @dee-writes-anime @megumisluciouslashes @peachyaeger @yourstru1y4ever @yoonights @skendos @babylambdietcoke @yunstarz @dinomdubs @kalulakunundrum @s777athv @sugoroo @wastednightsonyou @miri222 @jayawaya @dazailover4ever @courtneedsleep @kcch-ns @halovianembrace @tsukuhoe @kayamor @lupicalbestwolf @therealkurapikakurta @amarahi123 @he-is-chaotic-she-is-psychotic

[mcumorningstar]

begging for more riff x reader smut 🫣 I’d love if they were in a heated argument over riff buying a gun and riff says something disrespectful to reader making her slap him and then they just immediately go at it from the heat of the moment

Bang Bang

pairing: riff (wss) x reader

warnings: 18+ minors dni, kinda toxic but kinda cute, unprotected p in v (wrap it!!), riff’s got a gun, (I think that’s everything)

a/n: sorry this took so long I was on vacation. I’ve never done a request before!! Thanks for submitting :) This was more like I don’t wanna lose you sex than heat of the moment but hopefully this is okay!!

Sinking into Riff’s lap was the perfect remedy to a bad day. His arms wrapped around you and pulled you closer, your pelvis pressed to his.

Usually you would be reduced to a puddle of contentment but the hard press and sharp sting of metal pushed against your lower stomach.

Pulling back, you scrutinise Riff for a moment before tugging up his shirt. A small revolver was nestled in the waistband of his jeans.

“Like Billy the Kid, don’t ya think?” Riff smirked up at you, pretending to shoot bullets from his fingers.

God, it was easy to forget, because of his troubles, but Riff was so young.

“Get rid of it,” You stared at the weapon with wide eyes, “I’m not playing around, Riff. You’re gonna get yourself killed.”

“Born to die young, baby-o,” A wide grin plastered across Riff’s cheeks, smug and teasing. He squeezed your hips but you weren’t impressed.

“You gonna be laughing when you’re on a slab in the morgue?” You tried to stand, wanting some distance between.

“Don’t think like that,” He attempted to calm your nerves and refused to let you move away, pulling you closer.

A manicured nail jabbed into his chest, “Because I sure as hell won’t. I don’t wanna be a widow before I’m a wife.”

Riff sighed, his thumb rubbing against the empty space on your ring finger. An empty space waiting for a promised ring.

“They always bring heat. We gotta be ready,” He reasoned with you but your blood boiled as he removed the gun and examined it.

You scoffed, “This shit is so stupid, Riff!” You shoved his chest and rose from his lap, storming into the bedroom.

Riff followed you with a heavy sigh and heavy footsteps. He stood in the doorway, leaning against the frame.

“You expect me to go in there with nothing but the clothes on my back?”

“What I expect you to do is use your brain! Your daddy was in the exact same position as these Puerto Ricans you’re going to war with!”

“He was nothing like them.”

“Why? ‘Cause he speaks the language?”

It was a low blow but you wanted him to know how it looked.

“Don’t turn this into something it isn’t! This is a turf war,” Riff tried to level his steadily raising voice.

“Turf war? That slang for prejudice little boys with no jobs and nothing to do but terrorise foreigners?”

“Prej-? You know goddamn well that I’m not like that!Like you know what you’re talking about anyway! I’m not taking life advice from a hairdresser!” Riff snapped and, before he could have the nerve to feel bad, your open palm collided with his cheek.

You stood in silence for a moment as a red mark bloomed against his alabaster skin. It was not the ‘be the better person’ you were trying to drill into him, you knew that, but he pissed you off and it was almost involuntary.

“Shit” Riff jostled his jaw in all directions and rubbed a finger against his reddened ear, “You smack like my ma.”

Your hands cupped your slack jaw, “Baby I’m so sorry.”

Riff spared a glance in your direction as you stepped closer to him.

“Less of the smacking, yeah? I need my good looks or you got nothing to stick around for,” He smiled warily, “I ain’t no murderer, am I?”

You shook your head, biting your lip to hide your thrill at his decision, and smiled softly. Tentatively, you reached up and brushed your fingers against his red cheek.

“I’m sorry, baby. Never meant to damage your pretty face.”

Riff almost melted, his eyes softening, “You think I’m pretty?”

“A real diamond in the rough,” You brushed a strand of hair away from his forehead and cupped his jaw, “I couldn’t bear it if I lost you. Not for something this stupid.”

Riff pulled you closer and pressed his forehead to yours, “Never gonna happen. You’re stuck with me.”

A smile twitched at your lips. Despite the Jets, being stuck with Riff sounded heavenly. He dipped his head to kiss you softly.

“Never,” He whispered, pulling back an inch, his hot breath fanned across your lips.

“Good, because underneath it all, you’re the sweetest guy I’ve ever known. I don’t wanna lose you.”

Riff pulled you back for another kiss. A clash of tongue and teeth as the kiss grew heated. You needed him to know how true it was, needed him to know how much you needed him.

“I love you,” He panted between the hot collision of lips. A soft moan rose from your throat. Riff dropped his hands to your hips, pulling your body flush to his.

Your nails clawed at his neck, fingers getting lost in his hair.

Clothes were shed, lying in piles on the bedroom floor. Riff hovered over you as you lay back on the mattress, pressing himself between your legs.

Clinging to his bare flesh, Riff trailed open-mouthed kisses along your neck and pulled your leg higher on his hip.

His hard cock pressed against you through his boxers, as his hips began to grind against yours.

A breath moan escaped your lips, “Riff… please.”

Usually he would tease you. ‘Please what, baby?’ he would say, but not this time.

Riff nodded over and over again as he pushed down his boxers and pulled your panties down your legs. The full weight of him rested against your bare skin as your lips met again.

With tender hands holding you close, Riff pressed into you. It was slow and sweat beaded on your skin when a low groan from the man above you vibrated against your neck.

“Ugh god,” He squeezed his eyes shut and buried his face further against your clavicle, littering messy kisses there.

“Move baby please,” You panted out, rubbing his back with firm fingers.

Riff pulled his hips back a few inches before rocking into you again. He pulled his head out of the shelter of your neck, connecting his eyes to yours.

His hips moved languidly, skin slapping with every collision of his pelvis to yours and pushing against that spot inside you that made your toes curl.

“I’m- I’m sorry,” Riff panted, pressing his forehead to yours, “For- for what I- I said. I love you and- and that’s never gonna change. Not for turf, not for nothing.”

The rhythmic strokes of his hips rendered you non-verbal, only capable of moaning and nodding. Your eyes fluttered closed at a particularly hard thrust.

“Look at me, baby,” Riff wrapped an arm underneath your head, the crease of his elbow and the muscle of his bicep your new pillow.

Forcing your eyes open, you met his eyes - a gorgeous swirl of blue and brown in the left.

He’s beautiful.

“Never want to be without you. What was I thinking? Taking a gun? You’re right to call it stupid, baby. So stupid” Riff rambled on. You could tell he was getting close by his loose lips.

Riff mumbled between moans, sloppy kisses and panting breaths against your skin until your chest was soaked in his spit.

It was euphoric. His hand snaked between your sweat slicked bodies, pressed so tightly against one another, to rub circles against your clit.

A loud moan ripped from you and your fingers gripped the back of his head, holding his face so close to yours that you breathed each other’s oxygen. All while staring into the starry night abyss of his eyes.

As the band inside you grew tighter and tighter, you gripped onto Riff tighter. Your legs wrapped around his waist as if he were going to be ripped from you entirely and red crescent moon imprints of your fingernails bloomed against his skin.

“I’m gonna cum. Can’t- can’t hold on,” Riff groaned, doubling down on his efforts between your legs. His thrusts were losing rhythm but he was hitting spots deep inside you and working you with his fingers.

White spots clouded your vision as the band inside you snapped, gushing onto his fingers and cock. The feeling of your orgasm pushed Riff over the edge, whimpering ‘I love you’s’ as he finished inside you.

Warmth bloomed inside you at the feeling and, as you came down from your high, a giddy grin crept onto your lips.

With heaving chests, Riff gazed down at you and a grin equal in size and feeling graced his lips.

“You were right, doll. Nothing is worth sacrificing you for.”

“Oh I’m gonna need that in writing,” You teased, stroking your fingers through his hair.

Riff laughed and playfully bit your jaw until you pushed him off, rolling around the bed with blissful laughter.

He stayed in that night. The gun was gone by the following morning and in its place sat a vase of red roses.

[dead-boys-club]

†  clingy. : various.

❥ scenario: they snap at you for being clingy because they're idiots with zero emotional communication skills. ❥ requested. ❥ no warnings. ❥ a/n:

❥ this post includes: kat, shoto and p/h toya.

❥ katsuki.

bakugo had never been one to welcome attention, let alone public displays of affection, but with you, he found himself growing used to it. you’d always wrap your arms around him when he was with his friends, planting quick kisses on his cheek, smiling up at him as if he was the only person in the world. and though he grumbled about it, he never actually stopped you. part of him had grown attached to being treated like such.

one day, bakugo’s patience was running thin. you were hanging out with kirishima and the others in the common room, nestled close to bakugo on the couch with your arm around his shoulders. his day hadn't gone exactly how he wanted and for some reason, your affection was beginning to grate harsh on his nerves, which could be seen in how he tensed and shifted.

“you okay, kat?” you murmured softly, rubbing his shoulder.

his jaw tightened, and without warning, he snapped, “would you stop being so damn clingy? just… back off a little, alright?”

the room fell into an awkward silence as your eyes widened, hurt flashing across your face. you withdrew your arm, giving him a small nod as you stood up. “sorry, i hadn't.. realized it was bother you,” you mumbled, your voice thick. you couldn't deny the annoyance that came from him never saying anything beforehand.

the others exchanged glances, but you didn’t wait for anyone to say anything. you just left. and bakugo, the anger in his chest fading into guilt, stayed behind, feeling the weight of what he’d just done. normally, he'd keep such comments to private settings - your relationship wasn't anyone else's business.

for the next few days, you avoided him entirely. whenever he walked into the room, you were quick to make an excuse to leave, barely sparing him a glance. at first, he told himself it was for the best - you both needed space. but as the days went by, he felt the emptiness of your absence more than he cared to admit. he missed the warmth of your touch, your gentle kisses, the way you made him feel like he was more than just... him.

finally, unable to handle it anymore, he tracked you down after training one evening. you were gathering your things, about to head to your dorm, when he stepped in front of you, blocking your path.

“hey,” he started, voice rough, “we need to talk.”

you raised a brow. “what’s there to talk about? you wanted space, so i’m giving it to you.”

bakugo’s chest tightened at the tone of voice you used. he hesitated, then let out a heavy sigh. “i messed up, okay? i… i didn’t mean it like that.”

you crossed your arms, getting a little annoyed. “it sounded pretty clear to me.”

he reached out, gently touching your shoulder. “look… i shouldn’t have said that. i was just pissed about… stuff, and i took it out on you. i’m sorry.”

you paused, searching his eyes for sincerity. “ oh really?”

bakugo nodded, his voice softening. “yeah. i miss you… everything about you.” he rubbed the back of his neck, struggling to find the right words. “i’m an idiot, but… i don’t want you to stop. i just want you. all of you. and.... next time, i'll just.. pull you aside and talk to you.”

a small smile broke through your expression, and you stepped closer, wrapping your arms around him. “you better mean that,” you murmured.

bakugo hugged you back, pressing his face into your hair. “i do. i’m sorry.” and in that moment, he knew he’d never let you go again.

you, on the other hand, while relieved, had to stop from teasing him.

❥ shoto.

with shoto, your relationship was a balance of warmth and tenderness. he'd taken time to grow used to your affection but he found it calming. when you'd reach for his hand or rest on his shoulders - he was content. most of the time.

it wasn't often that shoto's patience wore thin, but it wasn't impossible. you were at a gathering with friends, chatting in a close circle when you leaned in to kiss his cheek. already tense from a difficult day, he shifted away slightly, and when you didn’t catch on, he muttered, “could you stop being so clingy? just… give me some space.”

you weren't offended by him asking for space, of course not, you were more than fine respecting his wishes and giving him space. the word 'clingy' cut deep, on the other hand, causing your mood to falter a bit. "sure, shoto." your smile wasn't as bright but you nodded, moving away from him to join a few of the others on the other side of the group.

the realization hit him a second too late - he’d pushed you away. the days went on and he started to feel empty. he noticed you slipping out of rooms when he entered, excusing yourself whenever he tried to talk to you. he had wanted space but it was too much.

shoto didn’t know how to bridge the gap he’d created. he wanted to apologize, to pull you close and tell you how much he missed you. but he wasn’t sure how. one evening, as he spotted you at the training field, he found his chance.

“can we talk?” he asked quietly, stepping up to you.

you let the question linger for a moment before shrugging, turning back to your gear. “what’s there to talk about, shoto? you made it clear how you feel.”

shoto’s throat tightened, gaze lowering. “no… i didn’t. i was… i was just in a bad mood, and i took it out on you. i am sorry.”

you finally looked up at him, your eyes filled with hurt. “do you even realize how shitty that was? i thought you wanted to break up.”

shoto’s heart clenched, and he shook his head, stepping closer. “i don’t. i could never want that. i just…” he let out a sigh, his fingers brushing against yours. “i’m not used to people caring about me like that. but… i need you, and i don’t want to lose you.”

your expression softened, only slightly, and you allowed him to take your hand. “are you sure?”

shoto nodded, giving your hand a gentle squeeze. “i’m sure. i’ll do better… i promise.” and as you leaned in, he finally understood how much he needed your love.

❥ toya.

being with toya was always an adventure, with his quick wit and casual confidence keeping you on your toes. despite his sarcastic nature, he was surprisingly warm and affectionate, and everyone knew it. he’d let you drape yourself across him, hold his hand, and even ruffle his hair in front of others. he enjoyed it, the public display and lack of shame to be with him. he never complained - until one day, everything was rubbing him the wrong way.

the agency was alive with a small gathering after a rough mission, everyone trying to wind down, chatting and laughing. you were lost in conversation when you leaned against toya, your head resting against his shoulder. his brow furrowed and he pulled away, muttering, “you’re so clingy. could you just… back off for once?”

the words hit you like a slap, and your heart dropped. the few others you'd been speaking to fell silent, everyone casting awkward glances your way. you straightened, blinking back the hurt as you nodded. “fine. i’ll… give you some space.”

from that moment on, you started avoiding him. when he looked for you in the agency, you’d already left. if he texted you, you responded with short replies. at first, toya told himself he'd play along, deciding you'd end up breaking first and boy, was he wrong. he missed you -missed the warmth of your touch, the way you’d always cheer him up with a smile.

finally, he tracked you down one evening, catching you just as you were leaving the agency. he stepped in front of you, blocking your path. “we need to talk.”

you shook your head, avoiding his gaze. “oh? do we? i wouldn't want to cling too much.”

toya’s jaw clenched, and he reached out, gently grabbing your arm. “you know that’s not what i meant.”

you looked at him, agitation clear on your features. “then what did you mean, toya? because i thought… maybe you were sick of me.”

his face softened, and he let out a heavy sigh. “i’m an idiot, okay? i didn’t mean any of that.” hr groaned, getting a little annoyed with himself and his inability to find the right words. “i was just… mad at everything else. and i took it out on you. i miss you… everything about you.”

you felt the anger and sadness in your chest slowly melt away. “are you sure? i didn't really enjoy being called clingy.”

he gave you a small, lopsided smile, nodding. “yeah. i’m sorry. just… stay, alright? i don’t want you to leave.”

you nodded, stepping closer as he wrapped his arms around you. and in that embrace, you knew he meant it.

“alright, fine but.. next time, it might come down to a fight-“

he chuckled, rolling his eyes. “sounds fair.“

[wttcsms]

if you feel like falling (catch me on the way down) | TWO

ᝰ.ᐟ after getting your heart broken by professional soccer player, rin itoshi, all because he loved the game more than you, you officially swear off all men — especially athletes. your publicist doesn’t get that memo, though, and you find yourself roped into a fake relationship with yoichi isagi, who isn’t just a pro soccer player, but also your ex’s rival. things could get messy. ( fem!reader )

[previous] [next] [full masterlist]

pairing yoichi isagi x reader (endgame), past! rin itoshi x reader word count 5.9k chapter synopsis the busier your schedule, the less time you can spend thinking about rin. the only problem is, you see something you can't unsee. nothing a bottle of tequila can't fix, right? (spoiler: tequila isn't fixing a broken heart) chapter contains partying and drinking to cope, diet culture author’s notes i have nothing to insightful to add rn, but send me any asks discussing this fic and i will have a lot to say LOL

From: fumiko.gima@apextalentgroup.com To: [USER EMAIL HIDDEN] Cc: wfitch@everlanefitch.com, mai.sasaki@apextalentgroup.com, hideakitakeda@titansecuritysolutions.com, benji1968@gmail.com + 3 others Subject: 6/19 — [NAME] [SURNAME] AGENDA Attachments: 📎 [6.19 AGENDA.pdf]

All — 

Attached is the PDF copy of [Name]’s itinerary for today. Reminder that these times are STRICT. Stay on schedule. 

Fumiko Gima

Get Outlook for IOS 

Your first alarm goes off at 4:50 AM to what you assume is the noise they play on repeat in hell (By the Seaside, an Apple classic). After waking up, you roll over in your king size bed (the problem with always choosing to go big instead of just going home is the fact that when you’re all alone, the luxury of extra space just becomes empty space) to promptly hit the snooze button. You’ll allow yourself five more minutes of sleep (as a treat). When the second alarm you set up goes off at 4:53 AM (By the Seaside, once again), you scream into your pillow, and shut it off for real this time. You knew you weren’t going to give yourself the full five minutes, but it felt really good to trick yourself into believing that you would. You always start the day with this tiny disappointment; that way, no one has the privilege of being the first person to piss you off. 

At 4:54 AM, you slide your feet into your Ugg slippers, readjust the loose straps of your silk camisole, and shuffle into your marble-floored bathroom. You rub the sleep from your eyes, brush your teeth with your pink electric toothbrush, and wash your face. By the time you’re done with your morning skincare, it’s 5:06 AM. You honestly can’t remember the last time you did your own makeup, but you bring your makeup bag with you anyway. If there’s downtime between shoots, you’ll post a faux-GRWM TikTok where you apply three miniscule dots of concealer on your seemingly already flawless skin and add a fresh layer of the brand new, limited edition Rhode peptide lip treatment that Hailey Bieber’s team gifted you. They also gave you twenty grand to do so, with a personal “hey girlie, would love to catch up with you one of these days!! life has been so hectic, sorry for not keeping in touch x btw, i just came out with a new shade of my…” text from Hailey herself. (You replied back with a “yessss, we need to meet up soon!! Also, LOVE LOVE LOVE the new shade omg 😍” — neither of you have any intention for planning a meet-up, and you don’t “LOVE LOVE LOVE” the new shade as much as you “LOVE LOVE LOVE” to deposit a fat check.) 

You’re sliding into the backseat of the glossy black SUV parked in front of your driveway at 5:14 AM. Your chauffeur, Benji, holds open the door for you. 

“Good morning, Ms. [Surname],” Benji never drops the formalities with you, except for when he’s lecturing you. Thank God he doesn’t own a smartphone; if he saw half the things Daily Mail wrote about you, his voice would be gone from scolding you so much. Even if he’s technically on your parents’ payroll and is paid to make sure you get to and from places safely, it still feels nice to have someone who cares about you enough to call you out on your shit. 

The first stop is an exclusive, members-only pilates studio. If you’re home, you have to work out in the morning, no matter what. You like your routine. Out of all the things online magazines put out about you, it’s kind of embarrassing how the most accurate one is revealing how you stay “fit ‘n flawless even after going out every night.” Most people didn’t believe it. Rin got it, though. Rin would actually work out with you, when the two of your schedules aligned, and— Time to start your workout early! Nothing takes your mind off of matters more than focusing on the burn of your core and arms. 

By the time you finish your private session, you’re walking out the studio with your puffy tote bag slung over your shoulders. Your body is still a bit damp from taking a quick shower but not drying off properly, and Benji drops you off at your first business stop of the day — ELLE Japan.

You smile brightly as the team of makeup artists surrounding you shower you with compliments. One of the girls brushing on your foundation tells you that you have really nice skin. When she goes in for a second layer, you almost consider rescinding the thanks you gave her.

The set is hectic, as expected. No matter how long these people have been in the industry, no matter how big the host is, something always seems to be going wrong. Apparently, there’s been a mishap over in wardrobe, and ELLE’s people are not very happy with how this is going to delay everything. With your hair and makeup done, there’s nothing for you to do besides sit down, be quiet, and look pretty. 

Downtime is the last thing you want. You’re used to a busy schedule, but you convinced Fumiko to accept as many projects as possible. If you have to rank at the top of the list for celebrities who emit the most CO2, then so be it. You’ll pollute the whole damn planet if it means you won’t have a single second to be alone with your thoughts. 

At 9:00 AM sharp, you go on your phone to inform your manager that the agenda is fucked. ELLE Japan is definitely going to push back this session with you for at least a good hour, which means Fumiko is going to have to explain to Your Style (the YouTube channel name for a famous fashion commentator who’s amassed nearly twenty million subscribers) why you’re going to be late for the Zoom debrief on what you two are going to talk about in an upcoming video. At 9:02 AM, you receive a text.

juli ᡣ𐭩: u know i love u 

It’s two in the morning in Paris. When Juliette said she was going to visit her father, she said it was going to be a much-needed vacation — just something chill and lowkey, like going to all the designer stores and eating croissants on a balcony. Those were her exact words. 

juli ᡣ𐭩: [photo attachment] 

Somehow, from the neon strobe lights, bodies pressed against one another’s, and the way the image is blurry because she couldn’t get her phone to focus, it feels like Juliette’s “something chill and lowkey” morphed into club-hopping all over France. You roll your eyes with affection. You should’ve known her vacation was going to turn into this; as if Juliette would eat bread for pleasure — she’s been quoted for claiming that carbs are a necessary evil. She probably hasn’t even touched a croissant for the past week she’s been there.

juli ᡣ𐭩: showing u before TMZ posts it juli ᡣ𐭩: [video attachment] juli ᡣ𐭩: do not freak out. not worth it. juli ᡣ𐭩: ugh i knew this club sucked ass for a reason 

You wait for the video to load. It’s almost as blurry and unfocused as the original image she sent, but you can tell she had to zoom in pretty hard to capture what she wanted. It’s two figures with a minimal amount of space between them. One of them is definitely a girl; she has the build of the usual French models. A thin, leggy brunette who has mastered the intricate art of Just Had Sex hair. Perfectly messy, but could never be considered sloppy. She’s wearing a sparkly, tight minidress. The fabric shimmers when the strobe lights pass by her body. The person she’s practically pressed up against is a man. Tall, lean. He’s leaning down, presumably so he can hear her better. When the video clip ends abruptly (someone bumped into Juliette, and the video ends with shaky footage and a loud “putain!”), you replay it. And replay it. And then you play it again, just for good measure.

Each time you watch the stupid video, you find something new to notice. Her red lips brushing against his ear. The way his hand hovers near her hip. The way you’re certain she’s smiling when she speaks, like the smirk of a victor. The exact same self-satisfied, smug grin you sport whenever you get a guy right where you want him. Upon every rewatch, though, one thing remains the same: you’re constantly fixated on him.

Right now, it’s two in the morning in Paris. You know that when you weren’t in this fucked up headspace you’re in right now, you’d be in bed, snuggled underneath your blankets, by 11:30 PM. You know that when you felt your best, you could be in bed, whispering in the dark to the person you felt safest with, at 10:00 PM (at the latest, because you both would have a busy day ahead and needed the rest). He likes sleeping early because he likes being well-rested. 

So why the hell is Rin Itoshi at a club right now?

At 9:39 AM, ELLE Japan gets right back on track. Before your editorial shoot for a special anniversary edition of the magazine, they get you to sit down to do a video interview that they plan on posting all over their social media. 

“This is a very special edition that will be coming out, and you are not only having the biggest spread dedicated to you, but you’re also going to be on the cover. Knowing this, how are you feeling right now, [Name]? This might be the most high-profile photoshoot you’ve done so far in your career, and that’s saying something. You have quite the impressive resume.” 

The ring lights are shining directly in your eye. The stool they have you sitting on for this interview is uncomfortable, and you have to focus on remaining balanced. Your back is perfectly straight, and your hands are folded in your lap. You blink, and you see the video playing in your mind. You have God knows how much makeup caked on right now, and you still have a long day ahead of you. Rin is at a club right now. Rin is at a club right now, with a girl. Rin is at a club right now, with a girl, and they’re basically grinding against each other, and he might just have forgotten all about you.

You smile brightly. At 9:40 AM in Japan, you let everyone know, 

“I honestly think I’m the happiest I’ve ever been before in my life! This is a great way to establish a sort of, I guess, new era of my life and my career.” 

You turn to face the camera directly, giving them a dazzling view of your pearly whites. “Not trying to rush the process or anything, but I am definitely looking forward to seeing how this will all play out in the future.” 

You’re operating on autopilot for the rest of the day. The ELLE shoot wraps up close to noon. You forgo lunch, but knowing you and your tendency to skip meals, Benji refuses to start the car until you eat the lunch his wife packed for you. It’s light and refreshing — they want you to eat well, but they’re not cruel. Even if they want to bring you a feast of a nice, hot, home cooked meal, you’ll eat it out of obligation and then suffer the consequences on set when everyone asks why you’re so bloated. You don’t even taste what you’re consuming. 

At 12:30 PM, you hop on the Zoom call and pretend to care about discussing matters such as the lack of personal style affecting the younger generations. Every topic is a trivial topic to you. The only thing worth dissecting is that damn video. You should’ve asked those twenty million subscribers to help you analyze that, instead of nodding along when the YouTuber starts going on a rant about how Shein and other fast fashion brands are ruining everything. 

Late in the afternoon, you get another text. 

kenyu: So the team wants to host a belated birthday party for me lmao. Team’s planning on having it at 10 tonight kenyu: Sending you the address right now

A party is exactly what you need right now. Endless drinks, no need for rational thinking, and you’ll be (mostly) surrounded by people who think models are all vain and vapid. No one there is going to expect a decent conversation from you, and with the state you’re in, it’s a wonder how all your sentences are even making sense. 

You give Kenyu’s next message a like in response. You were expecting a club, but when you click on the address, Maps reveals that it’s residential. Rin is gallivanting around European nightclubs, and meanwhile, the best you can do are house parties. This is how the future is playing out? 

At least even at your worst, people still think you’re on top of the world. 

Maybe life without a man dragging you down and invading your space is for the best. After all, once you got done with all your professional obligations, it’s only eight at night. You’re used to going out with whatever makeup they did for you on set at your last shoot of the day, which is a shame. You have shelves full of makeup that’s been sent to you by different brands, and one of these nights, you plan on just messing around at your vanity. 

You like living alone, you decide. You can leave all the lights on if you want, and no one complains about it hurting their eyes. You have full control of the thermostat. You don’t have to fight for counter space in the bathroom. Plus, no one can see how you’re living. 

At 9:13 PM, you’re sprawled on the cool marble floor of your bathroom (squeaky clean thanks to the housekeeper you have come once a week), and instead of rewatching that dreadful video and subsequently crying, you had a quick retail therapy session. Your new Prada heels should be coming within the next two days. 

You don’t get Benji to drive you. Nobody bats an eye at a rich girl having a driver, but it does seem kind of weird to have him drop you off at a party as if you're a tween girl getting taken to the mall. If the house is owned by one of Yukimiya’s teammates, surely it won’t be too awkward if you had to leave it there because you got too drunk to drive yourself back home? 

Because — no offense to Yuki, you’re happy he’s getting another birthday celebration — the whole point of even going to this party is to get fucked up. You already know that Juliette had a point — if not TMZ, then at least Daily Mail will be all over Rin and that girl in the club. If that gets leaked, then you might as well have your own headline to combat his. Sure, lately you’ve been out partying, but that was with other models so it doesn’t raise too many eyebrows. Rin being caught at a club is basically him hard launching the breakup. You need to raise some speculation on your side of things, too. 

you: can you get someone to pick up my car from this address tomorrow morning? you: please :) 

When you see three dots appear, you smile for real. You can practically hear her sigh and see the shake of her head.

Fumiko Gima: Yes. Fumiko Gima: Be safe.

Aw, maybe your manager does have a heart. Right before you can send her a heart, she adds:

Fumiko Gima: Don’t stay out too late. You have your first shoot at 8 AM. 

This is the message you give a heart reaction to. Maybe everything really is just business with her. 

You suppose you can’t fault Fumiko for always seeming cold. She’s your manager, not your best friend. 

In this industry, her honesty is refreshing. You normally find this to be the case, but you really feel it now when you step into the mansion and hear a cacophony of laughter swarming you from all sides. At every turn, there’s a celebrity with a drink in hand. Everyone’s leaning towards each other, as if they’re so captivated with the other’s words. 

You see an actor leading a stumbling model up the spiral staircase. To your side, you see a baseball player chatting up the daughter of one of the baseball league’s board members. Upstairs, someone’s probably snorting a line off Yukimiya’s teammate’s bathroom counter. There are only three reasons why people in your social circle attend these parties: to get fucked, to get fucked up, or to make business deals. Considering the fact that you’ve been here for nearly five minutes and have yet to see a birthday cake — or the belated birthday boy himself — you’re pretty sure everyone here has lot the damn plot for the original celebration.

When you venture some more, you end up in the massive backyard. Some people are drunkenly making out in the pool, some people are watching them, and in a table in the corner, you spot a group of girls giggling and cheering as they all do shots. Perfect. This is exactly where you need to be. 

One’s a model; you’ve seen her on a couple pages you flipped through in Harper’s Bazaar. You go up to the table and give her a bright smile.

“Hey, girl! Or should I say Miss Bazaar?” You greet her like how you think people would tease a friend. She’s not your friend; you don’t even know her name. You know she knows your name — everyone here does. And it’s because of the fact that everyone knows you that she lights up when she realizes you’re speaking to her. 

A photo op with you guarantees that even if the headline coming out tomorrow is centered on you, she’ll still be in the frame. Daily Mail will add a caption naming everybody from left to right, and she’s planning on being the one captured right next to you. 

“[Name]!” She squeals, giving you a quick side hug. “How have you been?”

All your friends, the grand total of exactly two people, know how you’ve been. You grin, pointing to the bottle of tequila they have on their table. 

“After how this day has been, I honestly just need a shot.” You play it off like a joke, and as someone pours you one, you add, “Or maybe like five.” They all giggle before throwing back the tequila straight. They might think you’re joking, but this table full of strangers are the first people you’ve been honest with all day. 

At 12:15 AM, they aren’t strangers anymore. In fact, you think they might be your best friends in the whole world. You don’t know the lyrics to the rap song blaring through the bass boosted speakers, but you’re laughing as you take another shot. The Harper’s Bazaar girl is doing another shot with you, but she has her phone in her other hand. She makes sure that the both of you are in the frame together, and a second later, she’s tagging you in an Instagram story you don’t bother to view. You’re not even following her. 

“Okay, so out of all the guys here, who looks the most fuckable?” One of the girls leans on the table for support as she asks this question. You can’t help but notice how glittery her lipgloss is. Wow, even after all the shots she’s taken, there’s no transfer. Impressive. “I say Theo Sachs.” 

“Who the fuck is Theo Sachs?” Harper’s Bazaar asks, and the whole entire table giggles. Honestly, at parties like these, laughing comes easy. In fact, you’re giggling right with them, even though you also have no fucking clue who Theo is. There’s just something so freeing in tequila-induced joy. 

“Um, the host of this party?” Glittery Lipgloss says. “Oh my God, girl, he’s like, one of the players for Bastard.” 

“The fuck is Bastard?” Another girl asks, adjusting her blue minidress. 

“The soccer team!” Glittery Lipgloss is too drunk to be fed up, but you’re sure she would be rolling her eyes if she could. 

“I didn’t know we had soccer players here. I only saw baseball players.” Blue Minidress frowns, before adding, “I would totally fuck one of the baseball boys, though. No preference whatsoever. Matter of fact, I could take the whole team.” 

Harper’s Bazaar laughs. “What about you, [Name]? Who are you taking home tonight?” 

Before you can think of something to say, Glittery Lipgloss groans. “Oh my God, she has a boyfriend.” She looks at you for confirmation. You don’t give her any, but thankfully Blue Minidress has her own insight to add to this conversation. 

“So what the fuck does that have to do with her question? [Name], who are you taking home tonight?” 

Nobody. Out of every party you’ve gone to this past month, you went back home, completely and utterly alone each and every time. It’s not even because nobody offered — they have — but because no matter how lonely you may get or feel, you don’t like strangers in your space. It took you three months of dating Rin to let him into the penthouse you were originally staying in, and that was with you being in love with him. 

Once again, you’re saved from answering when someone behind you goes, “[Name]?” 

You turn around, only to come face to face with Yoichi Isagi. On second thought, maybe this isn’t the rescue you thought it was. Drunk You can’t hold back your frown when you see him. He’s wearing a dark blue polo shirt and chinos. He looks perfectly business casual and could pass off as an off-the-clock investment banker instead of the world class athlete you’ve heard he is. Then you let out a little snort of laughter, which only makes him look more confused. You don’t want to tell him that it’s kind of funny how normal he looks. 

Not in a bad way. You’re surrounded by models for practically the whole day. Looking unattainably hot or having ethereal beauty is the one non-negotiable job requirement. Even Rin, with his stupidly long lower lashes and impossibly high cheekbones and his pretty boy resting sulking face, is serving standards some male models can’t achieve. Isagi looks like the type of guy you would have a crush on if the two of you were completely normal and attended regular high school together. 

But that’s not the reality you’re living in. Right now, you’re getting drunk with girls you don’t know, and every night, you’re making headlines. He’s a professional athlete that everyone at this table would gladly fuck just for a chance to be declared social media’s favorite WAG of the Week. The both of you could have your pick of anyone at this party, but you refuse to let anyone in, and you think Isagi might be one of those intense athletes who only care about their sport.

If that’s the case, he’s doing every girl a favor by not pretending he can commit to anything but soccer. You know someone who could use a few pointers. 

“Hi,” you mumble, and then you want to slap yourself because why the fuck are you acting like you’re nervous? But for some reason, you feel like you're a kid caught with their grimy hand in the cookie jar, like you’re doing something wrong.

“I didn’t know you’d be here.” 

“Well, it’s Kenny’s birthday party. Of course, I’d be here.” You cross your arms against your chest, feeling like you have something to prove. Before Yukimiya became his teammate, Kenyu was your friend first. Like, real friend, not just someone you leave supportive comments on their Instagram post type of friend. 

Isagi actually smiles when he hears that. “Funny. I think everyone but Yukimiya actually wants to be here.” 

You sober up a bit when you hear that. “Yeah, I couldn’t find him anywhere.” Not that you looked very hard. The minute you found this table of girls, you didn’t bother exploring the rest of the mansion. 

“He was upstairs with some of the guys. You know that he, uh, doesn’t really like these types of parties.” He rubs the back of his neck awkwardly. 

“You don’t seem like the type to like these parties either.” If he was anyone else, you’d be saying this to flirt. You’re honestly not sure what your intention behind this comment was, either. You’re too drunk to decide if you wanted it to be an insult (some way to defend Yukimiya’s behavior?) or just you trying to make conversation for once (you’re not normally one for small talk). 

“Caught me.” Isagi smiles easily. From now and thinking back to Yukimiya’s birthday lunch, Isagi is rarely not smiling. You wonder if he means it. Surrounded by people who only let you drink with them because being seen with you elevates their own status, you decide that the answer to that is a probably not. “I was about to head out before I thought I saw you, and I wanted to come by and…” For a second, he pauses to choose the right words to say. “Just wanted to see if it really was you.”

“Well, you saw me. Guess your business is done here.” Then you swiftly turn your back to him, as if to abruptly end the conversation. Instead, you’re drunker than you realize, and your heel ends up being wedged deeper into the grass than you expected, and you lose your balance. You think you might fall, which would be so embarrassing, but maybe not as embarrassing as what actually ends up happening.

What actually ends up happening is that Isagi is quick to wrap his arm around your abdomen, pulling you close to him as he attempts to keep you steady and upright. The girls looked shocked, but then they burst into another round of giggles, and since you’re not joining in the laughter, all you can think about is how annoying they are. You squirm around in his grasp, ignoring the whiff of fresh laundry you get from being all up in his personal space (not by choice!!!; he’s the one that pulled you in, after all!), and he releases you. 

“Are you feeling okay?” He asks you. It’s hard to glare at him when he looks so genuinely concerned. 

“Never better.” 

“Do you have a ride home?” 

What does it matter to you? Is what you want to say. 

“I’ll call an Uber.” You lie, hoping that this will end the conversation once and for all. Seriously, Isagi just killed the whole vibe of the party for you. You want to go back to drinking. 

“But I thought you didn’t do Ubers.” When Isagi calls you out on your bullshit, you soften momentarily. You almost forgot that he heard about your weird thing of having strangers know your home address. Then, you go back to giving him the cold shoulder. Sometimes, it’s a warm and gooey feeling to be known. Right now, you want to drown your sorrows in tequila and be showered with fake affection by girls who probably don’t even like you sober. You didn’t come to this party to be known. You came here for revenge. 

(You’re not going to acknowledge how drinking your sadness away isn’t necessarily showing up Rin, but for nearly an hour straight, you hadn’t thought about him, and that’s good enough.) 

When you have no response to that (wit doesn’t come easy when you’re in the condition you’re in right now), Isagi looks at you imploringly. 

“Let me take you home.” 

You shake your head childishly, almost saying nuh-uh. “Just because you don’t like this party doesn’t mean I don’t like it. I’m staying right here.” 

He finally frowns. “Fine. I’ll wait for you to finish up here, then I’ll take you home.”

“I’m with my friends right now. Leave me alone.” 

He raises an eyebrow. “Really? Which friend is going to make sure you get home safely? Yukimiya already left early.” Despite the two of you not knowing what the other is thinking, you both give wry smiles about that statement for the same reason. The party is still going on strong, despite the guest of honor not wanting to show his face and leaving early. 

“These are my best friends.” You gesture to the trio of girls you know nothing about, besides the fact that they can keep up with your drinking habits. They all smile at Isagi, who waves back before turning his attention back to you.

“Really?” He asks. “What’re their names again?”

No one has anything to say to that, especially you. When the silence gets too awkward, Isagi clears his throat and also puts his foot down.

“I’m taking you home, [Name].” 

You look at the trio of strangers you just spent hours with. Harper’s Bazaar shrugs, and the other two look away. The sting of not knowing who they are, despite them obviously having enough notoriety to be invited, makes your “best friends” not your friends anymore. Whatever. 

“Fine.” You grumble, following Isagi to his car. 

“Did you have fun tonight?” Is what he asks you as he signals to make a turn. The clicking of the turn signal is the only thing that fills the silence in the car. 

No. 

Sometimes, it’s fun in the moment, but that’s only when you’re drunk enough to trick yourself into thinking you’re having a good time. You’re more like Yukimiya (and — gross — Isagi) than they know; the whole “It Girl dominates the party scene” vibe you’ve got going on… It’s just bullshit that your PR team mixes together to get people talking. The high of being adored by everyone in a room vanishes almost immediately the minute you go home and wash off your makeup. In the bright lights of your bathroom, you stare at the sad, lonely girl in the mirror. It’s too dark outside for you to see anything out the window, but you lean your head against the cool glass, and before you know it, you’re waking up…

To Isagi groping you?

You’re groggy and confused and trying to blink the sleepiness out of your eyes, but Yoichi Isagi is definitely all up on you. You’re shocked, honestly. He looks like such a sweet guy! No wonder he was so pushy in getting you home.

He’s holding you in some awkward side hug, and he’s patting down your waist, trying to slip his fingers through the fabric of your dress, and finally, because he must be a novice-level pervert who doesn’t know the first thing about female anatomy, you speak up. 

“Gross! You can’t even feel up a girl properly! No wonder you take advantage of drunk, vulnerable girls!” 

“Ah!” He jerks back, shocked that you’re awake. Serves the pervert right. He should be backing up. You took a month of kickboxing classes (your modeling agency thought it would be the next big thing, since all the Victoria Secret models kickbox — they were wrong). “I-I wasn’t feeling you up!” 

“Then why were your hands all over me?” 

“I was looking for your key! You were asleep, and you looked like you needed it, so I just carried you to your door, but it’s locked.”

Oh. Likely story. You’re not letting him off the hook just yet. 

“Obviously my front door would be locked, dumbass. Who doesn’t lock their house?” You point to the perfectly trimmed hedges by your door. “Key’s in the bushes.”

Since you’re making no moves to get down on your knees and rifle through the bushes, Isagi sighs and does it himself. When he holds up the key, you nod in thanks, take it, and then proceed to unlock the door using your fingerprint. 

He blinks. “What?” 

“What?” You repeat back, innocently. 

“You didn’t even need the key to unlock the door!”

“Yes, Isagi. Modern technology is something, isn’t it?” And because you feel kind of bad, you offer him the chance to wash up before driving back. 

“You’re really something, you know that?” Isagi says from the kitchen sink. You’re sitting on a stool by the counter.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It’s nothing bad.” He clarifies. “It’s just… Rin’s a pretty private person. We always wondered what his girlfriend must be like. Sorry.” He shuts off the faucet, dries his hands. “Ex-girlfriend, I guess.”

“How do you know that?” You’ve been racking your brain, wondering if Yuki spilled your secret accidentally. Or — even worse — Rin himself confirmed it. Rin never even told anyone explicitly that the two of you were dating, so it’s not plausible that he would go blab about the breakup. 

“Well, I didn’t really know for sure until I drove you home that first time.” He admits. “I just thought you made a weird face when I mentioned Rin during lunch, and then you started acting funny afterwards. Just had a hunch, that’s all.” 

Great. So, Isagi, who’s basically a stranger to you, could read you to filth. Is there anyone else that you haven’t been fooling? How embarrassing. Being perceived sucks. 

You don’t say anything else. You can hear Isagi mumbling about something, and you make a half-hearted noise in reply, but you’re sleepy and drunk and coming to the realization that you can’t keep fooling everyone around for long. There’s no point in dancing around the topic of your breakup. It’s getting tiring, anyway. 

It is pretty exhausting to be pining after someone who’s not coming back. 

Because that’s why you’re trying so hard to keep the breakup a secret. Partly for pride, but mostly because… You’re hoping that after learning everything there is to know about you, Rin Itoshi wouldn’t go so far to cut you so deeply by leaving you. Right? He understood your level of loneliness like no one else, and he related to it. For the first time in both of your lives, the two of you suddenly found the right person to fill in all the empty spaces. 

And then he left, and the emptiness just continues to grow in infinite amounts.

You groan as you move around, only to find that you’re moving on top of your bed. You’re tucked into your sheets, and your hair is splayed across your pillow. You turn your head and see a shadowy figure exiting out your bedroom door.

“You’re leaving, too?” 

Your throat is dry, and the words come out small. You hate this feeling of hopelessness and vulnerability, and the figure pauses in his steps. 

He hushes you gently. “You should go to sleep. You’ve had a long night.” 

“Fine. Don’t stay. I don’t care.” You burrow yourself further into your blankets. 

“Do you really want me to stay?” 

At one in the morning, covered in the darkness of your bedroom, you turn every shadow into Rin Itoshi. You don’t know what you mumble in response, but you know that whatever you said, it’s directed towards him.

[nyxxxatnite]

Poison

Plot: it should’ve been known that just because you slept with him, doesn’t mean anything changes. And you can’t help but fall for his words every time

Pairings: asshole!Wally Clark x loner!fem!reader, alive!wally x alive!reader

warning(s): SMUTT!!!! Heavy angst at the end, reader gets used for sex, semi-public sex, p in v, unprotected sex (WRAP IT), no happy end, wally bullies the reader, wally is an absolute asshole unless he’s fucking the reader, fingering, degrading, tbh this is shit, NOT PROFREAD

a/n: YALL. okay so i recently binged Hazbin Hotel and this smut is based on a song from the show called Poison. I’m obsessed with it! Anyways. Lets get TO IT!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

the sound of the bell snaps you out of your day dream, making you look up from your notepad. Students are standing and making their way out of the classroom to hurry to their next class, leaving you by yourself. As you begin to pack your things you noticed a folded piece of paper tossed between the pages of your notepad. You grab it gently and open it, immediately recognizing Wally’s sloppy handwriting.

“Meet me in the janitors closet during our free period ;)”

you roll your eyes and crumple the paper up, tossing it into the trashcan as you walk out of the already empty classroom. You wouldn’t fall for his shit this time. The last time you did your heart got torn into shreds. But at the same time…god you’ve never had an orgasm like the one he gave you. It should’ve been a one time thing, well no, it shouldn’t have happened at all. You only went to his house to help him out with homework like he had requested and one thing led to another and you were pressed face down into his mattress as he ruined your insides.

the second time it happened? Well, honestly that was your own mistake. It was after school and you wanted to find a place to smoke in peace, so you wandered to the football field. Low and behold there he was, running laps by himself. In your defense you did try and leave but he’s a football player for crying out loud. He caught up quick and stopped you, starting to tease you about your habits. And one thing turned into another and you were riding him on the bleachers with your skirt bunched at your waist.

you hated him and he hated you but fuck his dick game was too good. But you wouldn’t let it happen again, especially when you realized about a week ago you like the football player. When you fully figured it out you avoided seeing like like he was a solar eclipse. Which made him pissed off, so when he noticed you spaced out in class he thought it the best time to give you the note.

before you could even fully wander down the hallway, you were being pulled into a small space. And when the chemicals hit your nose you knew exactly where you were. You ripped your arm from the quarter backs grasp and glared up at him.

“what the fuck Wally,” you snapped and stepped back to the door. Effectively, he blocked you in and pressed himself to you, against the door. You knew if you tried to leave you’d out the both fo you, and you’d hate to have everyone mock you

“you’ve been avoiding me, asshole, what the fuck,” he sneered and leaned down to be closer. The closer he got the more his scent encapsulated your sense. Fuck he smelt so nice.

“no shit, i fuckin’ hate your guts,” you sneered back and glared up at him. The only response you got was a snicker from him.

“nah, the only guts in this equation are yours while i’m fucking ruining them,” he whispered and gently placed his lips to your neck. You shiver and try to flinch away but his hand in your hair stops you from moving. You try to free your poor hair from his grasp but he grips harder and glares down at you.

“admit it, you love when i dick you down. You’re a fucking whore who loves to get pushed around by the star football player. Which isn’t a surprise, seeing how much of a freak you are.”

you should’ve been upset by his words but all you felt was arousal, that familiar hear between your legs. Why was this turning you on so much? Without too much thought behind it, you swung your arm back a bit and up. With a loud smack, your hand lands on his cheek, a harsh slap erupted in the small space. His face turned to the side from the impact, but that wasn’t what deterred you. The smirk rising to his lips made you lean back a bit in surprise and then the sudden impact on your chest settled in as he spun you around. With a harsh push, he’s pinning you to your front against the door, arms locked behind your back.

you hiss at the contact and try to snap at him but are cut off by the harsh yank from your hair along with the smack that landed on your ass. You let out a yelp and squeeze your eyes shut at the harsh sting hits you like bricks. And within seconds you’re feeling the cold air hit your already soaked cunt. He’s all but careful as he shoves his ring and middle finger into your hot cunt, making you moan out. His free hand is slapping over your mouth as he pumps his fingers in and out of your aching cunt at an aggressive speed, curling them every now and then to hit that perfect spot inside of you.

with his hand muffling your moans, you let them fly. Small pants are given from the dark haired boy as he pressed his hard cock against your plush ass that still stung from his assault earlier. Your eyes roll a bit from the harsh pace, already feeling a small knot build in your gut but it was easily ruined as he pulled his fingers out abruptly. You wanted to cry out in protest but the sound of his belt being undone made your heart leap in excitement.

He’s grabbing your hips and pulling them back a bit so your ass is out more for him. You jump a bit as you feel his tip prod at your entrance, gathering whatever wetness he could before he pressed into you. The stretch always felt a bit tight but you knew you’d be feeling like heaven in moments.

but he sat for a second, stuffed to the hilt inside of you. You turn your head a bit to look back at him but he grabs your hair and forces you to look away from him. Your confusion is dissolved as he starts to pull out only to slam back into you. You bite down on your lip to keep your cries in, loving the feel of his dick deep inside of you. His pace is all but sweet as he starts to fuck into you like a dog in rut. The soft groans coming from him were like heaven, along with the loud sounds of your squelching cunt and his balls slapping against your clit and his pelvis smacking into your ass.

you try and reach back to hold onto some part of him but he quickly slaps your hand away, keeping his hand in your hair to keep your head stabilized. And for some reason you feel like he’s trying to keep himself distant from you. After he had just bitched about you avoiding him as well.

your thoughts are interrupted as you felt that knot in your lower abdomen build up again. You whimpered softly and reached down between your legs, rubbing your clit quickly to help. Wally’s hips keep pistoning into you, trying to chase his own high as well. Within a few more thrusts he’s shooting his cum deep inside of you, painting your walls that milky white color. His finish triggered yours making you spasm a bit, feeling your liquid leak down his dick and your own thighs. You were thankful you were wearing a skirt, clean up would be easy.

after taking a little breather you started to get yourself together. You turn your eyes up to the boy, seeing his eyes clouded with thought. You stepped closer only to be pushed back, “we can’t do this again. If people found out i was fucking you my reputation would be ruined. Just stay the fuck away from me from now on, freak.”

with that, he’s moving around you and darting out or the closet, leaving you alone. You’d fallen for it again, and this time his poison hit its mark leaving you with a broken heart.

[gbukkii]

plug Connie x black reader sum nasty smut and angst 🥰🥰

oh yes bby i got youuuu.

A/N: i haven't wrote any sort of smut since march so this might be kinda bad. other than that please enjoy :)

synopsis: you and connie have been arguing, leading to make up sex at a party.

tags: degradation, creampie, smut with plot, eye fucking, cunnilingus, p in v.

ＤＲＡＮＫ ！； ｃｏｎｎｉｅ ｓｐｒｉｎｇｅｒ

"Babe, I'm done arguing with you," Connie said looking at you. You sat with your legs crossed on the shared bed you and your boyfriend slept on. Your bonnet was slightly crooked to the side with your back slouched.

"You're doing too much." He added as he stood at the foot of the bed looking at you like you were crazy.

Lately, you and Connie have been arguing over complete nonsense.

Yesterday you guys argued about him being out all night doing his work which consisted of selling the local population drugs. This morning you guys argued over who had to wash the dishes.

"Baby, I told you I would do them later after I was done with my deliveries." He softly explained to you. "I don't understand why you're so frustrated with me." He said, looking at you with a raised eyebrow.

"You don't understand?" You asked, mocking the tone of his voice. Connie sighed loudly as you said that; you were really getting on his nerves.

"You don't understand that your drug dealing impacts our relationship?" Your voice got a little bit louder as you spoke, you were growing tired of his absence. This relationship was feeling extremely one-sided.

"You know what I did before you got with me." He tells you, his voice is low as he looks at you in disbelief.

You were tired of this conversation. You get up from the bed and before you can walk past Connie he grabs your arm softly, not being too rough.

"Connie get off of me!" You snapped at him, pulling your arm away from his grip.

"Don't yell at me." He told you, his voice sounding more like a warning as he looked down at you with those big eyes that you adored so much.

It was hard to stay mad at him when he looked down at you like that. But, you were tired of him constantly making promises and leaving them empty.

"I need space." You told him, changing your tone of voice realizing that snapping on him wouldn't improve the situation.

When you said you needed space that pissed him off. "What do you mean?" His agitation visibly showed on his face.

"I need to be alone for a couple of days." You told him as you looked up at him, waiting to see his reaction. "Where the fuck are you gonna go?" He quickly said.

He was obviously mad.

Why do you need space over a stupid argument?

"So you need space because I told you to wait for me to do the dishes?" He asked you condescendingly, that tone really ticked you off.

"No, I need space because you don't have your priorities straight." You said as you started to put on your Crocs to leave the apartment.

Connie was looking at you too stunned to speak. You were actually leaving. "Where are you going? I don't care about all that other shit." He says, following your every move.

You rolled your eyes as he spoke. "I know you don't care, that's the point." You snapped as you took the keys to your car.

"I'll be at my parents, let me know when you have your shit together." You said before walking out the door, slamming it in Connie's face.

The moment you slammed the door in Connies face he backed up. He murmured something under his breath and then let out a sigh while scratching his head in confusion.

You giggled while being on FaceTime with some of your closest friends.

You haven't talked to Connie in a couple of days. You've been with your parents staying low.

"Y/n, are you going to Jeans' party?" Your friend Aliviya asked you.

"I was supposed to go," You softly told her while looking directly at your laptops camera. "But, now I'm not sure" You added.

Jean was one of Connie's closest friends, they grew up together and even did business with one another.

"Bitch, don't let your argument ruin your fun." Your friend Samantha said, your other friends on the call nodding their heads in agreement.

"You're coming," Aliviya said, leaving no room for an argument. "I'll come get you at twelve, that gives you plenty of time to get ready." She says before leaving the call. After Aliviya left, everybody said their goodbyes.

You closed your MacBook after everybody left the call, sighing while looking at yourself in the vanity mirror.

You got yourself ready. Blasting your favorite songs from your playlist to lift up your spirits, despite how much you hate to admit this; arguing with Connie was affecting you.

The knot-less boho braids in your hair touched your butt in the black, but classy party dress that you were wearing. You checked yourself out in the mirror before spraying tons of vanilla scented perfume.

You did one last spin in the mirror before grabbing your gold clutch and phone. When you checked your phone you saw that Aliviya had texted you, signaling that she was outside waiting for you.

After you put on your heels you left your parents house to see Aliviya's obnoxious car outside playing music, and of course, smelling like weed.

You entered Jeans house with your friends, the loud music practically making you deaf. The smell of alcohol and different strains of weed hit you like a ton of bricks.

Aliviya leads you to the drinks, quickly offering you something to get your mind off of things. To be honest, you needed it.

But, as soon as you took that sip of Pink Whitney you immediately spotted your boyfriend talking to Jean. You guys made eye contact, and you looked away in a heartbeat.

Connie then excused himself from the conversation he was having with Jean and approached you.

"So, you're gonna act like you didn't see me?" He pressed you while taking long glances at your curvy body. You shifted uncomfortably at his gaze, him looking at you was making you incredibly aroused.

Your cocky boyfriend takes note of this. "Who you wearing this for?" He said, pulling at the straps of your body-con dress. His eyes were on you, and only you.

"I'm wearing this dress for myself." You told him while trying to move away from him and his wandering eyes. He raised an eyebrow at your statement, he also realized that you were trying to move away from him.

He discreetly pinned you against the kitchen counter with his hands on your hips. You were looking everywhere but him, searching for your friend Aliviya but her tongue was down Jeans throat.

"Hey, look at me." Connie said, "You haven't looked at me since you got here." He pointed out, and it was true. When you did make eye contact with him you quickly looked away.

You didn't know if it was the tension from the argument between you, or the tension in your panties that was begging to be fucked.

When he said that you looked at him, your brown skin was glowing with rosy cheeks. Connie smiled at this, you were always so good for him. Listening to him, as you should.

"Come with me." He said, taking your hand and quickly leading you through the crowded house. After walking in on multiple couples in the rooms, you found an empty bathroom.

Connie wasted no time grabbing you firm, but gently on the neck and bringing you in for a deep passionate kiss. The kiss was slow at first, and then progressively got quicker and nastier.

Connie broke the kiss, placing his big tatted hands on your butt and lifting you up onto the sink. Your legs involuntarily opened for him, your body already knew the routine.

The song Swimming Pools came on. The lyrics were muffled but you recognized the beat.

Before you knew it, Connie was in between your legs taking off your panties with his teeth looking up at you the entire time. He teased you, kissing and licking your inner thighs slowly.

Without a warning he then began to fiercely suck on your clit, still looking up at you. "Oh my fucking god." You mewled, grinding your pussy impatiently on Connies face.

He then began to lick on your folds to the beat of the song playing throughout the house. You moaned loudly, letting Connie know that you were close.

But, you didn't deserve to finish. Not yet.

Connie abruptly stopped his licking, making you whine at the loss of friction. He brang his face out from between your thighs. He had your juices all over his pink lips.

He looked at your face, noticing the look of disappointment. "You think you deserve to cum after the way you've been acting?" He asks you.

He pulls you down from the sink, quickly not leaving you any time to complain. He bends you over so you were facing the bathroom mirror.

You hear Connie undoing his belt, and taking his thick and long dick out. He then grabbed you by the face.

"You're gonna look at me while I'm fucking you, understand?" You quickly nodded your head. You were desperate for him, all this arguing had you pent up and horny.

He let go of your face and then slapped your wet pussy with his hand, making you jolt forward and let out a tiny whimper before he stuck his thick digits in you. He was preparing you for the real deal.

He fingered you until you were on the brink of cumming, he then pulled his fingers out of your sopping cunt. You see him lick his fingers clean from behind you through the mirror.

Connie gently grabbed you by the waist, although he was gentle he still made it known that he had dominance. He led his big throbbing dick into you, letting out a moan as he bottoms out.

He looks at you through the mirror, making sure you were still paying attention and following his directions. He then started to move quickly and with a purpose.

He watched as the flesh of your ass connected with his balls. "Look at you, you're such a whore for me." He said through gritted teeth while he continued to look at you through the mirror.

Everytime you closed your eyes and didn't watch him, he roughly hit your g-spot making your eyes open with a moan.

He pulled you by your braids as he roughly fucked into you, he was leaving you a moaning mess. "Connie!" You moaned his name as you came closer to release.

"What baby?" He mocked as he continued to fuck you. He let go of your braids, moving closer to your neck while thrusting up into you. He began to kiss on your neck, feeling a little bit sorry for the way he was fucking you.

He felt you were getting tight around him. The knot in your stomach snapped, you came all over his dick. He continued to fuck you through your orgasm trying to reach his.

He smacked your ass making you moan loudly. That moan sent him over the edge, he came in you. Releasing all of his load and frustration into you.

You were both out of breath, you stood bent over the sink for awhile before Connie said anything.

"So, do I still have to do those dishes?"

[chereus]

Oblivious Boyfriends | D. Winchester

Summary - Dean had been neglecting his boyfriend bedroom duties and you were getting frustrated [set in season 10ish, they’re fully moved into the bunker]

Pairings - SoftDom!Dean x Fem!Reader

Warnings - Dom Dean, daddy kink, if you squint there’s angst before the blinding smut, spanking, choking, hair pulling, p in v, unprotected sex, breeding kink, hot angry Dean, sexual tension, talk about love and marriage??? Kinda??? It was done tastefully though I promise!!!

Cherry’s notes: Whew! That was spicy—in honor of my new phone I decided I’d post this as a thanks to people who’ve supported me throughout my writing journey <3. I’m still getting used to this writing format that tumblr has so pls be nice!!!

P.S ~ This may have been sorter than intended due to tumblr deleting half of this while I wasn’t looking. Still upset about that. Also sorry for the time delay because of said tumblr issues, had to rewrite most of it + an ending -_-.

Word count: about 1.2k

You were kind of being a bitch today. But in your defense, your boyfriend Dean had been so busy with work that he hardly had time to satisfy your in the bedroom needs. When you’d try and communicate that this was becoming an issue you’d been brushed off every. single. time. So naturally you started to get frustrated and decided to take control into your own hands for the time being.

“Y/n, have you seen my gun?” Dean announced himself as he stumbled into the library. You just continued to sit there and do your research without so much as a morsel of acknowledgment.

He cleared his throat and tried again, “Y/n have you seen my gun?” only this time he got a small clench of the jaw and a silent flare of the nostrils. Still with no response he decided to try a third time when you suddenly just got up and left leaving him completely alone in the library.

Wondering what he did he promptly followed you, but once he realized he wasn’t getting far by just following in your footsteps he bravely spoke, “Okay, seriously, is this how we’re acting today?”.

This immediately caught your attention but you showed no signs of making a huge scene so you quickly and calmly stopped while turning around to face him while replying with, “I don’t know Dean, is it?”.

He really didn’t like the passive aggressiveness in your tone. It hadn’t helped that you’d quickly spun around and once again resumed ignoring him. Being ignored was one of his top ten pet peeves and you knew it. That’s exactly why you chose this method to piss him off. Get him all worked up, he’d have to take his frustrations out on you then.

“What the hells’ that supposed to mean?” He countered, following you into the kitchen.

“It means that if you don’t know then it’s not worth talking about.” You said truthfully. Suddenly Dean found himself recalling the days to see if he’d missed a birthday, a dinner, an anniversary, anything that would constitute this type of treatment and he came up empty.

As you noticed Dean sitting there dumbfounded you took it upon yourself to grab one of his beers from the fridge and march back out successfully initiating phase one.

You’d been toying with the idea for quite some time but never had the means or justification until now, you were going to go around the house and dump all of the alcohol.

This was seemingly easy considering after your and deans little spat, he’d decided to give you some space to cool off seeing that you were angry with him. It gave you the perfect opportunity to do what you needed to do. This was phase two.

Phase three was to just sit back and watch the anger seep from deep within Dean Winchesters veins until he couldn’t see anything but red.

Sam had been on a hunting trip for the last couple of days and you were thankful because the things he would’ve heard…

“Y/N! Where is all the beer?!” Dean hollered as you passed him in the kitchen.

“I dumped it.” You simply said. Deans face went slate.

“You-you…dumped it.” He said as both a statement and a question. You could see the vein on the side of his neck start to pop and you knew he was close to blowing a gasket at how he had been treated.

“Yup. I dumped it. Decided that we’re now alcohol free. Have fun with your green juices and detox tea.” You were beginning to walk away when he grabbed you and spun you back around so that your chests were touching and he was holding your wrists on both sides of your head.

“Is there something that needs to be sorted out? Cause’ I’m getting’ real tired of the way things have been going around here.” He seethed. He probably just wanted a nice cold beer after working a long hard case all day but you weren’t about to let that happen. You were horny and determined to do something about it.

You got closer to his face and begun to look into his eyes while simultaneously brushing your lips together with his. Nudging your nose against his you whispered, “if there was a problem you’d know.” And you ripped yourself away from him and swiftly dropped out of the room beginning to feel yourself getting wetter by the instant.

Not even ten seconds later Dean came marching out of the kitchen behind you demanding that you work this out by pushing you against the hallway wall. You responded by grabbing him by his belt loops and smashing his hips against yours. He’d finally gotten the hint.

“Is this what you wanted? Was my pretty baby just horny and desperate for her daddies attention?” He said as he grabbed you by the throat and kissed you. You whimpered at the gruffness of his touch, desperate and craving more.

“I need you to answer me, y/n. You know daddy doesn’t like it when you go silent.” Dean enforced. You let out the tiniest little ‘yes’ lost in your own world of pleasure and fulfillment.

“Louder, y/n.” He commanded putting slightly harder pressure onto the sides of your throat that were sure to bruise later but you didn’t care. The feeling of his body on your body was enough to drive you wild.

“Yes!” You deeply moaned wrapping your hands around his hips and flushing your pelvis’s together. Dean leaned down and planted an earth shattering kiss on your lips, tongue swirling around with your own while he still held the position of holding your neck firmly in place without making you dizzy from the lack of air.

“Up.” Dean forced. Slipping his hand under your thighs and wrapping your legs around his torso. When you were situated your hands found their way to his hair to gently tug at the roots.

Hiking you up by your ass you were looming over him with every adjustment. Your hands made their way to either side of his face while you ferociously kissed him. He started to stumble his way down the hallway, careful not to drop you. You moaned as his grip on your ass got tighter the more aroused he was getting.

The warm smell of cinnamon from your hair, the combined scent your vanilla bourbon perfume and your honey body lotion, it reminded him of home. Although you’d been getting in spats and arguments all day you’d still somehow made him feel loved and cared for by the way you’d responded to his touch.

It was at this very moment he decided that he wanted to marry you. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, or hell— maybe not even next week, but someday If you’d let him.

Finally stumbling into your shared room dominant Dean was back in action. He gently put you down and then shoved you back onto the bed signifying the fact that he was done playing the game you’d been playing all day.

When you adjusted yourself on the bed he immediately ripped your pants off annoyed at the extra fabric keeping the two of you apart. Dipping down he gently put his right hand to your jaw and repeated what you had to him earlier. Brushing your lips together your noses tenderly touched and he gave you one last affectionate kiss before looking down at your tank top and ripping it in two.

Your eyes widened with desire, you’d never seen Dean like this and it was extremely sexy. The mix of softhearted kissing and rough manhandling was driving you insane. Kissing down your stomach the torn shirt was quickly discarded never to be seen again.

Only in your bralette and underwear you start to feel cold with Dean still fully clothed. Grabbing him by his hair you pull his head up from your panty line. Giving him a single peck on the lips you start to peel off the layers of flannel and cotton until his top half was fully nude.

Reaching down to undo his belt buckle he stops you with a questioning glare. He shoves your hands away and moved away from the bed and to the closet where a medium sized black box was laying on the top shelf. Getting that box down you knew that something freaky was about to happen.

Pulling out four long black ropes he looks back at you with a smirk. You gulp and back away slowly, however he was faster and started tying your left wrist tightly to the headboard. Positioning you in the middle of the bed he ties your right to the other side of the headboard.

Deciding to discard the last two ropes, he resumes your playful foreplay now teasing you at the fact that you can no longer touch him in the way you wanted to.

“M’ gonna fuck you in this pretty little bra. You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Been walking around all day getting on my nerves so I’d have no choice but to fuck the aggression out. Well, you should be careful what you wish for.” He says menacingly pulling off your underwear.

Leaving your bare pussy in the cold Dean jumps off the bed and begins to slowly undress. And I mean slowly. You thought you were about to combust when you finally saw Dean unbuckle his pants and slowly drop them.

Getting back on the bed Dean slides his hands up and down your curves on your sides, trailing down to your hip bones and finally your throbbing heat. It really was no surprise that you’d gotten worked up so easy considering you and Dean hadn’t had really any sex in almost four months. Orgasms, yes. Sex, no.

It was killing you not being intimate with Dean like you used to. So when he finally put his cold hands on your warm aching pussy you could’ve cried in relief even though it was only through your panties you could feel his fingertips rubbing up against your clit causing you to softly moan in delight.

Gripping the tightly tied ropes Dean tormented you by pulling off your panties and just sat there. Staring. It would’ve made you insecure had you not known that Dean would’ve loved you no matter what you perceived your vagina to look like.

“Would you let me put a baby in you?” Dean asks out of the blue. Your eyes widened and your breath hitched, “In the future of course. Your still on birth control, right?” He thought out loud. You were speechless so all you could do was nod and let out a small ‘uh-huh’.

Dean could tell you were now really tense after that question so he took his hands and smoothed them over your stomach and said, “Don’t worry. Not until your ready. But until then, I’d like to practice.”

Your muscles were slowly untensing as Dean assured you there would be no baby making until your ready. “If we’re practicing, do you mind going in raw? I’d like to be closer with you.”

Dean was now blushing but tried to hide it through dominance. He spread your knees apart and quickly dove in licking and sucking your clit. Pulling at the ropes, you moaned and groaned until you were so close to cumming that you could cry.

Dean could tell how close you were so he sped up his tongue motions and hooked his arms around the base of your thighs so you couldn’t move anywhere.

“Oh fuck!” You moaned as your first orgasm took over you. Dean wasted no time in sliding his manhood into you with great force.

Putting his hands at your hips he began roughly thrusting into you at an angle that kept hitting your g-spot over an over again. As you were getting louder and louder with your moans Dean reached down in between your legs and rubbed your clit. He was fucking you so hard at this point you were seeing spots.

“Yeah. Your such a good girl. Taking it so good for me. Gonna be doing this to make a baby one day, huh sweetheart. Look at me.” He said as your eyes were starting to droop. Your eyes tiredly opened and you seen Dean look at you like your the queen of the world. His world. With adoration and love.

“Gonna let me fill you up, hmm? Gonna let me take care of you while your carrying our child? Gonna let me go out at three am to fill some ridiculous request of bread and butter pickles from that grocery store half an hour away?” Dean asks with a fond smirk on his face. Like he’d be so excited to be able to do those things for you.

Just hearing how happy it would make Dean to be your caretaker in your time of need makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Not just because he’s still fucking the life out of you.

Once you get close enough to the edge Dean starts to get greedy. He wants you to cum and he wants it now. “Give it to me y/n. Now.” He says wrapping his hand around your throat and pounding into you like there’s no tomorrow.

Seconds later it felt like fireworks had been let off in your stomach with how hard you were orgasming. At one point you were certain that you were seeing stars.

“Fuck! Dean!” You moaned as you made other noises that you had no idea you could even make. Before you could even come down Dean slipped out of you and was undoing the ropes.

“All fours. Now.” Was the command. Still a little dizzy, you comply wanting to see where this was going.

Upon getting on all fours dean was already behind you thrusting upwards at a new angle. Letting out a deep groan you dropped to your elbows and grabbed the sheets.

“Having that attitude all day really drove me nuts all day, y’know that? Now I get to fuck it out of you and I couldn’t be happier.” He said slapping your ass hard. You yelped and tried to go forward but his hands at the crease of your hip and thigh bone wouldn’t let you.

“Your not going nowhere. Your gonna sit here and let me breed you like a good little slut.” You couldn’t deny hearing those words made the sex ten times hotter. When you leaned your head back to moan deans hand was there to grab you by your hair and continue fucking your pussy until you exploded.

Pulling your hair was the final step in your third and final orgasm. Pulling away slightly at the overstimulation Dean speeds up, chasing his own climax. With one last grunt Dean came spilling into you with force.

“Oh God,” you shuddered, suddenly very cold. Goosebumps lining your skin, you get off the bed leaving Dean to fend for himself.

After you cleaned up you got back in bed with Dean. “Did you really mean what you said? Do you really want kids with me?” You asked as you lifted up the covers where Dean currently resided.

“Well yeah, I’d also like to put a ring on your finger too whenever you’ll let me.” Dean said shyly playing with the edging on the covers.

You quietly smiled and kissed Dean as you settled down. “I love you, and I want to marry you. But kids are out for a while. At least until I’m sure one of us isn’t going to end up dead with the shit we deal with on the daily. I won’t put another generation of kids what we went through. I just won’t.”

Although Dean was disappointed, he understood. His childhood sucked and he’d do anything to make sure that his kid didn’t live the same life.

“But we can still practice though, right?” Dean asked cheekily. You laughed, “yes Dean we can still practice.”

You both chuckled when you heard a voice booming from the kitchen, “Dean, where is all the beer?!” It was Sam.

“You were kidding though about the beer weren’t you?” He asked and you laughed harder.

“No, I wasn’t. I was committed. I really dumped all the alcohol in the house. Sam will understand given his healthy lifestyle.” Dean groaned and sunk into the mattress. You were still cracking up at the whole situation now that you felt better after your release.

[shares-a-vest]

@steddielovemonth Day 13: Love is... Showing up when someone doesn’t ask (Prompt by @steddieas-shegoes)

wc: 559 | Rated: T | cw: Food Mention

Tags: Valentine's Day, Date, Steve Harrington Angst (happy ending)

By the time Steve closes up Family Video on Valentine’s Day night, he is feeling pretty sorry for himself.

He thinks 1987 might be the first year since he’d hit adolescence that he is alone. In years past he’d at least had a date to give flowers to, even if it didn’t go much further than that. And, as he twists the lock in just the right way so it will actually lock, he begins to regret his whole holding-out-hope-for-true-love thing.

Because everybody has a date this Valentine’s Day.

Robin is at the drive-in with Vickie. Dustin is on some nerdy radio date with Suzie. His parents are at Enzo’s. Hell, even Keith skipped out on his shift early to go pick up Cindy from the laundromat.

He rattles the door, just to make sure it’s locked when he hears a rustling sound behind him.

Sighing, he turns around and readies himself to tell whoever is showing up late with a return to piss off…

Only it’s Eddie, holding up a brow paper bag with the Benny’s Diner logo emblazoned on the front.

“Brought you dinner,” he smiles all tight lipped and dimpled.

“Thought you were going somewhere with Jeff?” Steve grumbles despite snatching up the bag and catching a delectable whiff of melted cheese.

Eddie shrugs, “Dude bailed on me, man.”

He fiddles with his rings and looks at his shoes for a moment before jumping back to attention with a click of his fingers. Steve narrows his eyes, suspicious as Eddie begins digging in his jeans pocket and produces a handful of change.

“And that’s for a Coke,” he says, offering up the coins.

“Why?” Steve blurts out and his rudeness makes Eddie clam right back up.

He twirls a lock of dark hair around his ring-adorned finger and pulls it across his face.

“Just thought you’d want something to eat...” he explains, his voice quiet and bashful as rocks on his heels, “Valentine’s Day sucks.”

He passes it off with another shrug and looks out at the empty street, his dark eyes illuminated by the nearby street light, the shine of his chains and jewellery shimmering too.

Steve sucks in a breath.

The thing is, Eddie always does this. Shows up.

To make Steve laugh during a dead shift. To bring him coffee in the morning when it’s way too early. To bring him a whole goddamn meal.

He doesn’t have to do any of this for Steve. Not really.

Steve tightens his grip on the paper bag and steps forward, as close as is more typical of Eddie’s usual lack of personal space. He can smell his cologne – it’s strong like he had recently freshened up, perhaps just for Steve...

“Hey Eddie?” he asks softly.

“Yep?” Eddie answers, popping the ‘p’ as he continues to avoid his gaze rather conspicuously.

“Do you want to go on a date with me?”

Eddie looks up, startled.

“Now?” he gapes, wide-eyed.

“Yeah,” Steve smiles, more assured than he felt in months.

“Where?” Eddie frowns.

“I don’t know,” he laughs, “Anywhere you want. Benny’s. Sitting in my car and sharing this burger. Fuck, we can go back to my house and eat cereal for all I care. As long as I’m with you.”

Eddie grins and gestures to the Beemer in a half bow, “Lead the way, sweetheart.”

[pygmi-cygni]

Playing Favorites - pt 2

do i have another fic I should be updating? yes

am i?

no.

i like having gifs of poe to stare at dreamily while i mentally scream over my writer's block.

warnings: none, feels, mentions of anxiety, comfort

xox enjoy

@brighterthanlonelywords part 2 as promised!!!!!!

read part one

--------- Episode 2 - Baby steps -----------

You steadfastly ignored him for the next week. Your bruises healed with bacta and time, but the residual terror still had its claws fully seated in your mind. Thompson's glare flashed every time you closed your eyes. The raw, unadulterated hatred still shook you. Never had you seen somebody so cruel.

"Knock knock."

You froze at the familiar voice, back turned to the door. Your seat was big enough, could you pretend like it was empty and hide under the desk? If you sat still long enough, he'd go away. Maybe-

In your pondering of an escape plan, Poe had already rounded the desk and stuck his beaming face into your line of sight.

"Hiya, cutie. Changed the hair again, I see." Your hair was tied up with ribbons, colored orange and black.

"Nice colors," he winked. You flushed.

"They're for BB," you lied through gritted teeth. Poe, unaware or uncaring of your closed-off attitude, collapsed into a chair opposite you and grinned.

"Been a while, I was wondering if you'd forgotten me." He was fiddling with the galactic model on your desk, spinning the Inner and Outer Rim like a DJ disc.

You didn't answer, picking at your skin. He paused, scooting closer. His gaze was soft, imploring.

"You okay?" Poe's voice was soft, intimate. It had been a week since the Thing. Thompson had been decommissioned and General Organa had done her best to soothe the concerns of you and your fellow squadmates.

But still, the fear remained.

You nodded mutely, knowing you couldn't speak the lie. Poe, smarter than he looked, called bullshit and sighed.

"I know I'm not your favorite," he said, "but that doesn't mean I don't care about you. Just a little bit." He held his hand up for emphasis, fingers almost touching.

A faint glimmer of a smile, and then it was gone. You still stared at the floor, willing yourself not to cry. Realizing you needed space, he touched his forehead to yours and left, closing the door gently behind him.

A still warm cup of caf had been left on your desk, with a little BB unit sketched on the side.

Sorry for the trouble. I'd like to see that smile again.

P

You dropped your head on your desk and cried.

It went like that for the next few weeks. You would hide away in your office and Poe would silently walk in, leaving coffee and a note. Sometimes he'd linger, poking around your belongings and tossing out a relayed hello from Beebs.

You never looked at him.

Until a Tuesday in the middle of the blandest week to date. A few officers stormed in, making you spill your coffee, and tossed a very burnt looking pilot into your office.

"Engine fire,"

"Messin' around,"

"Fistfight,"

they all said over each other. Still pissed about your precious caf, you waved them off and toweled your desk down.

"This better be good, because that was my last cup of caf."

"If it's the caf I brought you, does it cancel out?"

Your head snapped up to meet Poe's sheepish grin. He was smoking slightly, the very ends of his hair crisped to charcoal. Ashen grease coated every inch of him, and you frowned to think of the stain he was leaving on your chair.

"What the hell?"

Poe, to his credit, told the story neatly and without embellishment. He'd been fooling around in his X-wing and shot a rogue blast into another pilot's droid pit. A grease fire followed, and here he was. You shrunk into yourself. There was no getting out of this.

"I'll need a full damage report within the hour, and your flight status will be reconsidered for ineligibility. Please-"

"Don't."

You stopped, stuttering like a broken speeder. This wasn't- shit, no, you needed to stick to the script and don't look at him- your eyes met his. Poe was looking at you desperately, eyes shining.

"Please don't ignore me," he pleaded. "I didn't mean to get you hurt and I just wanted-"

"Poe," you stammered, looking at him with raging tears. "I need...I need you to go away. For a wh-while. Please."

He looked like a kicked puppy. "I'm-"

"Please."

Your cheeks were streaking, the mascara you'd carefully applied with the hope of no tears today was pitifully washed away. Just like yesterday, when he'd faked an argument with Rose to end up in a disciplinary meeting with you.

Or last week, when he tried to tell Organa that you needed to interview him for a recon debrief.

Or every single other time he'd tried to apologize and you'd shut him down.

It hurt you, too. You missed him, and you wanted to accept his apology and hug him and wipe the mopey look off his face. But it made your heart quake and your breaths come short.

It was scary. You could be cold, you could shut down, that was familiar. But the new thing with friends and a fuzzy feeling inside made you cower with fear. You didn't know what to do with that. Where did it go from there?

You curled up in your bunk, shuddering in the darkness. It didn't feel comforting anymore - it felt like you were a little kid hiding from the monster under your bed.

Driving a stake through your heart, you wrapped a comforter around your shoulders and padded down the hall.

Your voice was soft when his door shhfffed open.

"Can I have the R2-D2 light this time?"

Your legs swung off the edge of his bunk. Poe sat gingerly across from you, cradling his night-light so that both of your faces were lit. As promised, R2-D2 sat comfortingly on the bedside table.

"Why are you scared of the dark?" You asked suddenly.

He perked up at your voice and smiled. "Dunno. Just never got over the idea of something hiding in the shadows."

You nodded, burrowing into your blanket. Poe was anticipating your next question, rocking slowly on his heels.

"Why'd you change your hair?" He asked, timidly. Not sure if you'd bite or run away.

You poked your nose out of the blanket burrito.

"I missed you," you blurted, tears welling again. Containing his monumental relief, Poe settled a hand on where he thought your arm was under the duvet. Me too, his gentle caress said. More than you think.

"I-I'm sorry, Poe, I didn't m-mean to..." you trailed off into tears as he soothed you, wiping the tears from your face. The warm glow from his nightlight was dimmed by you being pulled into his lap. He leaned against the headboard, your head under his chin.

The hug was messy and uncoordinated; what with you being wrapped in a comforter and his hands being entangled in your hair. Your heart had broken into shards, and it wouldn't be easy picking it back up. Poe knew. He knew enough to stay quiet, letting you wring yourself dry in the safe circle of his arms and the halo of R2D2's glowing form.

Poe was in agony. He knew this would take time. A single night of closeness wouldn't shatter the sky-high walls you'd built around yourself. But he was losing his mind with the urge to pound them down with his fists and skip to the i love you please love me back and fly into the sunset.

But he could wait. His hands were shoved deep in his pockets to prevent from touching you, almost tearing his flightsuit with the strength of his grip. You sat stiffly next to him, so distant he wanted to cry.

He wanted you to look at him. To say something, even if it was a tease or a scathing remark for his tardiness. He'd purposefully strode into the meeting late to attract any kind of attention from you, but your eyes stayed shut.

So he laid his chin on his hands and tried to pay attention. He was never good at these kinds of events. Too much talking, too many pictures and pages of information. He needed time to read and think and doodle and do something other than just sit there.

Poe knew his fidgeting was distracting, so he tried to keep it to a minimum. You weren't acknowledging him directly, but he could feel your mild irritation every few minutes.

General Ackbar was still talking, but the buttons on his suit were so tempting to snap and his hands were bored-

A sharp jab in his ribs made him yelp. Whipping around, he was prepared to cuss out-

oh.

Your hand was outstretched, hiding under the table. A small silver ring was in your palm, attached to a thin chain. He took it slowly, gauging your face. You stayed turned towards Ackbar, but inclined your chin subtly and returned to writing notes.

His heart trilled at the small gift, turning it over to inspect it. There were multiple bands, and they spun together nicely. Poe fiddled with it, grateful for the distraction. A gentle whirring sound made him grin. It was a neat little toy. The rest of the meeting fell on his deaf ears, totally enraptured with the ring.

As soon as the debrief was adjourned, you sped off before he could return it.

Oh well, another excuse to see you. Not that he wanted to give it back, but he did want to see your face. Poe hung it around his neck and tucked it under his collar fondly. It clicked against his mother's ring, right over his heart.

That night, in his bunk, he sat awake. His gaze was focused on the door, awaiting a timid knock. He'd made sure both the night lights were charged and waiting.

A small ping on his tablet and he was scrambling to pull it off the charger.

Notes from today, read the message, and your familiar scrawl filled the screen. He grinned, settling down to peer through your looping handwriting. You'd drawn diagrams, which he knew you hated but helped his brain connect the dots. The sections were even color-coded.

He studied the drawings until his eyes fluttered closed, hugging the glowing remnants of you close to his chest.

One step forward.

Poe was back to his chipper self the next day, revived by your small act of kindness.

He engaged in a raucous round of sabacc with the Gold squadron, still laughing even after being thoroughly trounced.

"Good to see you again, Black Leader," Rose jibed, nudging him in the ribs. "I was afraid that last engine fire mighta smoked your brains out."

"Yeah," Gold Two chimed in, "what's up with your record, dude? Got some kind of unlucky streak?"

Poe's ears were flaming. "Uh, whaddya mean?"

Rose's eyebrows were dancing a mirthful tango. "Oh, nothing, we've just noticed your tendency for clumsiness has...increased. I mean, I knew you were a mess but damn-" she pulled up his record. "Two grease fires in a month? Sheeeesh, those HR officers must be sick of you."

Gold Two's eyes glimmered. "Unless....it's one officer in particular?"

He was certain his cheeks were blistering from the heat pulsing under his skin. "It's been a rough while, alright? Until I see you complete a barrel roll without pissing yourself, shut your mouth."

Two guffawed. 'Low blow, Dameron, low blow."

Having barely dodged that bullet, Poe laughed. "Hey, at least I'm not walking around with wet boxers."

"Boxers? Who said I was wearing any?"

Rose made a gagging noise and shoved away from the howling men. "Y'all are nasty," she said, screwing up her face, "I'm out." Another raucous round of laughter followed her out. Poe chuckled again, poking at his food, but the familiar nagging in his chest was beginning to return.

Just go say hi. Wave. Walk past her door. Maybe peek through the blinds?

He wanted to toss his food at the wall. This was so stupid. You were both adults, you could have a normal conversation without stumbling around each other like emotionally repressed apes.

Before he could lose the nerve, Poe stood up and strode out, jaw set. Gold Two looked up quizzically but made no comment. You were most likely holed up in your office, buried under paperwork and meetings and Important Things that permanently framed your face in a pout.

But he wanted to see you. And because he was also Important and desperately in love with you, his attention took priority over all else. Well, he thought it should at least.

To his shock, you were leaning back in your chair with a holovid playing quietly on your tablet. You looked up, but didn't tell him to go away. Poe hovered, waiting for a dismissal.

It didn't come.

Like trying not to spook a bluurg, he carefully seated himself next to you and slid his gaze to your screen. It was some action flick that had been released a few days ago. It looked awful, in his opinion, but your shampoo smelled nice and he liked the domesticity of watching a movie.

You had a penknife in your hand and were flipping it around. It was mesmerizing; the nimbleness of your fingers as they twirled around the glittering blade. Poe's hand went to the ring you gave him, gaze glued to your gentle expression. He wanted so badly to hug you.

"Hey," he whispered, mindful of the vid.

You swallowed and he saw your lips twitch.

"Hi."

"How's it been?" God, it felt like an awkward first date.

You looked at your hands. "Okay. Not too bad."

Poe nodded, picking up on your hesitant tone. You didn't want him here. He hung his head, biting his lip. Maybe next ti-

"How...about you?" You added softly. He looked up, surprised. Your head was tilted to him, hands stilling. A tiny sliver of hope begun to shimmer in his chest. Maybe...

"It was good," he said, "did a bunch of drills, some reports-"

"I saw," you blurted. "I...I um, I saw your scores. You did a good job."

Poe sat back, awestruck. you were talking. to him. nicely. was he dreaming?

"An honest to God compliment," he breathed. Immediately, he clapped a hand over his mouth. Fuck. It was so immediate; that comfortable banter from Before. he'd forgotten.

But you didn't hide this time. He saw it, the instinct to cower, but you fought it. "Don't get used to it," you poked drily.

A grin brighter than the Yavin suns split his face in two. You gave a tentative smile in return, subtly leaning closer to him. Your gaze returned to the movie, but Poe's stayed firmly on you.

Baby steps.

His hand twitched, inching closer until he looped his pinky with yours. His heart preened when you linked tighter, brushing your palm against his hand.

Baby steps, one at a time. You'd get there. One day.

do you guys like it??? idk how to feel oh well xox

also I will die on the hill that Poe is ADHD. 100%.

@my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction

@krakenkitty

comment to join the taglist

[deep-fried-egg]

(I am deep-fried-egg. I am not stealing fics.)

Full throttle

Warnings: inaccurate explanation of illegal street racing, g!p, lesbians

Smut below this shit 👇👇👇

Tara is an illegal street racer. is she ashamed? not at all. she's proud of herself! she's the most famous street racer in all of New York. anyone can recognize that powder blue 1976 AMC racer from miles away. and everyone knows it's her because of how beat up it is.

Now y/n is her nemesis. Tara has never been able to beat y/n in a race and has made it her life mission for the past 3 years.

Y/n is the only person Tara can't beat actually. somehow Tara constantly fucking loses against her. Tara doesn't give up though.

This time Tara got a little distracted per se during this race and here's why:

"Why do you keep racing me, Tara? It's not like you ever win!" Y/n yelled from where she was sitting in the car next to Tara who looked like she was making a plan on how to win the world cup.

Tara rolled her eyes at y/n's statement and just said. "Because I can" with so much confidence in herself. Y/n smirked slightly at Tara but then just said "Well you're going to need to be faster Tara if you're going to win." which honestly pissed Tara off because she could still win if she wanted to.

Y/n just shook her head at Tara's stubbornness and went back to looking through her phone while waiting for Tara to get ready. Tara looked over at y/n who seemed to be scrolling through Tumblr or something. Y/n had this thing for Tumblr. Kind of weird but who cares.

"Alright, I'm ready." Tara smacked the roof of y/n's cat before getting into her own. y/n smiled at Tara who gave her the middle finger back before driving off towards their first race. which was about a mile away.

before they knew it the race was starting and they had to rev their engines before starting. just to show off a little. Tara immediately went full speed as soon as she could go. She made sure to never hit the brake pedal to keep her pace up. she felt the rush. the adrenaline coursing through her body. She loved doing this. speeding her car down an empty street. racing her biggest enemy. the one girl she was determined to win against.

Tara's heart began pounding and her breathing quickened as she approached closer and closer to the finish line. As soon as her mind started focusing on the win she was about to have under her belt she looked outside the passenger's window (big mistake) and saw y/n lift her shirt and bra to flash Tara which caused Tara to rapidly lose speed and y/n ended up winning the race yet again.

Tara started spacing off as she could feel her cock start getting erect at the thought of seeing y/n's tits again. She couldn't help it really, y/n was just irresistible.

the moment Tara stepped out of her car she stormed towards y/n and pushed her front onto the roof of her car. "that wasn't fucking fair y/n." She hissed into the h/c girl's ear as she gripped her hips tightly. y/n let out a small gasp as she could feel Tara's dick pressing up against her thigh.

"you cheated." Tara continued pushing into her and letting her hands slide under the hem of y/ns shirt so she could trace over the smooth skin of y/ns stomach. y/n squirmed at Tara's touch. "you cheated." Tara repeated as she bit his shoulder and then made a suggestion.

"we should move this into MY car. I want to feel like a winner." Tara suggested with a sly smile causing a shiver to run down y/n's spine. y/n nodded and allowed Tara to pull y/n towards her car so she could open the door to the backseats and fucking ruin her.

Tara struggled to open the back door because there was a large dent near the handle which made it difficult to open the door. y/n giggled at Tara's struggle before opening the door herself with no problems.

Tara rolled her eyes before climbing into the backseat with y/n following shortly afterward. y/n shut the door to the backseat firmly before she turned her head to look at Tara.

Tara pushed y/n down so she could straddle her thighs. Tara then lifted y/n's shirt and gently bit the skin of y/ns shoulder.

"Tell me I'm a better racer or I'm not fucking you." Tara whispered in y/ns ear and y/n swallowed hard before saying, "y - yeah you are! you're a better racer than me!" Tara grinned at y/n response. y/n's voice cracked when she said that and Tara smiled even more before biting Y/n's collarbone.

Tara unhooked y/n's bra before she saw those beautiful breasts and she almost moaned at the sight.

"Fuck. I've been wanting to do this." Tara murmured against y/n's neck. Tara felt her goblin instincts take over and she quickly rid both herself and Y/n of the rest of their clothes before settling between Y/n's legs.

y/n gasped at Tara's sudden movements as she felt Tara position herself and push in without thinking.

"fuck.." Tara mumbled as she started thrusting inside y/n. Tara didn't know where her self-control went. every part of her body ached for this woman. she only wanted to fuck her, to take her all night long.

but y/n doesn't deserve it. not after all of that winning she's been doing! Tara thought bitterly as she continued to thrust into y/n harder and harder. She groaned at the thought of how badly she wanted to make y/n cry out in pleasure. to beg for her release. to scream out her name. but she kept quiet and didn't say anything instead continuing to pound into y/n mercilessly.

Tara reached down to grab y/n's hips so she can thrust in a little easier. y/n wrapped her legs around Tara's waist in response.

"fucking hell Tara! I - oh fuck!" Tara watched as y/n arched her back in ecstasy. the sound of y/n's moans, her breathy whimpers, made her feel things she wasn't used to feeling. but it also made her feel a sense of pride and accomplishment.

she wanted to hear y/n scream like this again and again. to hear her beg for her to take her. to taste her. to feel her. Tara wanted y/n to forget everything and just come undone beneath her. Tara wants y/n to give her what she needs. Tara thrusts a few more times before she cums deep inside y/n. Tara kept on thrusting though, even if she was getting overstimulated.

"o-oh fuck Tara! I'm going to cum!" Tara suddenly pulled out of y/n before she could cum which made y/n whine in disappointment.

"oh my god, y/n don't be such a baby. I'll let you cum at some point! I just need to teach you a little lesson." Tara told y/n who just rolled her eyes at Tara's words and pouted. "I hate you." y/n said as she crossed her arms against her chest and glared at Tara who just chuckled lightly at y/n's reaction.

"no, you don't," Tara said before slipping back inside of y/n once again. Y/n was panting now which Tara took great pleasure in. Y/n grabbed Tara's hair and buried her face into Tara's neck. Tara felt satisfied hearing y/n whimper her name and she smirked at the sound.

"Tara please...please! I need you to make me cum." Y/n pleaded desperately which caused Tara to roll her eyes at y/n's words and started moving in and out of y/n slowly while listening to her cries of satisfaction. Tara knew that she was getting close to her climax. Tara could practically see y/n coming apart underneath her. "god! You're killing me, Tara..." Y/n breathed out, "Come on! I'm so fucking close!"

Tara just laughed at y/n's desperate pleas. "you're so cute when you're needy, y/n." Tara said teasingly and Y/n just growled lowly as she tried to move herself on Tara's throbbing cock. Tara pulled out once again since she didn't want y/n to cum too soon.y/n was panting heavily by now and Tara couldn't help the grin from forming on her lips.

"you are SO fucked up." Y/n growled angrily at Tara.

"maybe. but you should have thought about that before you made me lose the fucking race. now get out of my car and go home."

"but I didn't even-"

"no buts. I would have won if you didn't flash me y/n." Tara stated as y/n climbed out of the car. "don't think I won't do this again if you make me lose another race."

[haveyouseenthisskeleton]

Everyone gets swapped! I. E Horrortale Papyrus and Sans are in Undertale, and normal Undertale S&P are in Horrortale. Same with everyone else, your pick!

Undertale Sans [in Horrortale] - Well he hates it for sure. He just went to see Undyne to ask for help, and she immediately tried to murder him, screaming she doesn't know how he grew his HEAD back but that now she has a second chance to do it... He's unsure what, and by the time she's done monologuing, he doesn't want to know honestly. He just waves goodbye at her and goes to the big door to check on Toriel. Hopefully she's normal.

Undertale Papyrus [in Horrortale] - He's not sure what the hell is happening. Everyone is weird and kinda ask him to make spaghetti, and he's so confused? No one ever wanted to eat his spaghetti before. Why did everyone like him suddenly? He doesn't like it, that's weird. He locks himself in the house lol.

Underswap Sans [in Swapfell] - So, uh... Apparently, he's some sort of heir to the Queen and she expects him to kill people for her or something. He's not a big fan of this, actually. He's glad he's a real royal guard now, but he's not glad everyone wants to kill him. He's not sure what the other Sans in this universe did to piss off everyone like this, but no one likes him lol.

Underswap Papyrus [in Swapfell] - Please someone brings him home? He hates it down there. Everyone has LV, and everyone expects him to be funny all the time and to find plans to free the whole Underground somehow. That's way too much pressure and his shoulders and he just wants to curl up in a corner and cry, please. Leave him alone...

Underfell Sans [in Fellswap Gold] - Welp, that's not like different from home. Except here, everyone is scared of him for some reason. Well that's nice! Be scared of him! He's big and scary and definitely has a lot of LV! What you're looking at? He's powerful! Run and cry! Maybe he's enjoying this a lot more than he should.

Underfell Papyrus [in Fellswap Gold] - He's so mad! Everyone is treating him like a fragile little thing and he's losing it! Get off his face! Alphys tried to drag him three times back home, talking to him like he was some sort of lost puppy and he hated it! You don't tell him what to do! Why is Red considered like some sort of evil god and not him?! He can be an evil scary monster too! Stop treating him like a baby!

Horrortale Sans [in Undertale] - He's not sure how he ended up in this house and he's not sure how long he has there, so he empties all the fridge and cupboards into bags to take back home with no remorse. He needs that more than whoever lives there.

Horrortale Papyrus [in Undertale] - Undyne looks horrified seeing him. Willow is so confused. Do you hate him or do you want to help him? Make up your mind already and stop looking at him like that! Actually, something looks wrong with Undyne. She looks... Younger. And have her whole face actually. Uh. Did he come back in time or something? Urgh, is his brother tricking him through time and space again?

Swapfell Sans [in Underswap] - He's so confused and scared. One day everyone hates me, the next everyone is his friend, he's not a royal guard anymore and he can actually do whatever he wants without risking the Queen to see him having a good time??? Did he die? Please tell him he died and the nightmare is over. He cried for two hours straight out of confusion in the arms of an even more confused Alphys, who doesn't understand where the hell Blue learned how to fight overnight (and he dresses edgy now???).

Swapfell Papyrus [in Underswap] - He was not thinking much of it until he realized none of the people of Snowdin live in fear of his pranks. Well, that has to change. In a week, the whole town is traumatized because no one can make two steps outside before getting pranked to death. He's having so much fun! And he doesn't even have to hide anymore! He's definitely staying there, no way he's going home.

Fellswap Gold Sans [in Underfell] - What the hell? No one is scared of him anymore and three people already attempted to kill him for no reason. Are they all brain-dead? Don't they know who he is? By the time he realizes it's not his universe, he killed half the population of Snowdin and had his post as captain of the royal guard back by beating the hell out of Undyne. No one tells him what to do.

Fellswap Gold Papyrus [in Underfell] - He thought some monster was following him because everyone is running away when he goes somewhere. He just wanted a milkshake at Muffet's, but everyone is staring at him like he's sick or something, and also that's not Muffet at the bar but Grillby and he's apparently not happy to see him and refuses to serve him a milkshake. Well, he's going to tell it to his brother. Everyone smirks and starts to laugh at him???? He doesn't like this world. He's going to hide in "his room" until he understands what's going on.

[webslingingslasher]

Tells Me We're Not Done

Part 2 to Something in the Orange.

this is so long tumblr is making me put it in two parts, adding part 3 after this!

Genre: Angst/Fluffy

Warnings: depictions of sex, stay safe, kiddos!

Word Count: 15k between here and part 3

Summary: Peter does his best to win you back after he dumps you.

The Parker household could be eerily quiet. 

Funny how you never noticed it before, usually the giggles escaping your mouth as Peter pinched lightly anywhere he could reach would fill the empty spaces. Or you could hear the whisper of Mays TV in her room, maybe even Peter as he danced around in the kitchen making grilled cheeses or grabbing you stashed soda. 

But right now in Peter’s room all you hear is the hum of the AC, and the drips coming from his bathroom sink, he needs to turn it off all the way. You hear the slow whoosh of cars passing by several floors down, you hear Peter’s fingers tapping on the kitchen counter, you can’t help but wonder if it’s because he’s looking for something or he’s trying to think of something to say, anything to break the silence. 

You hadn’t looked at Peter since you got here, you didn’t even speak to him. 

“Hey! I’m glad you could still find the place.” He tried to joke. Tried. 

You nodded your head and swerved around him into his room, you set your bag higher on your shoulders, and then you felt very aware of your surroundings. It’s been a while since you’ve been in his room, it was almost comedic, this was always where you felt the most safe but you have never been more on edge than right now. 

Where did you sit? 

On his bed? Too many memories, the way he fit over your body perfectly. The bed where he made you feel loved and protected and safe and treasured? No, you can’t sit there. 

At his desk? The same one you would sit across his lap on, the one that you had begged a time or two to get off his game so he could get on you? The same desk he’s bent you over? No, you can’t sit there. 

Peter watches you move your head around his space before your shoulders slump with defeat and you throw your backpack off and drop to the floor sitting crisscross. 

The floor was safe, nothing happened on the floor. 

“Want anything to eat? Something to drink?” 

The carefulness in his voice, the comforting gesture made the hair on your neck raise, you didn’t say a word. 

You didn’t want to be here, that was well known. 

Peter sighed and made himself absent, it didn’t feel good to him either. Knowing that this is your worst nightmare and you were currently experiencing it made him feel pretty shitty, it doesn’t help that you won’t give him anything to work with either. 

You stared at the carpet long enough to see swirls and shapes, tracing with your hands. Your brain made a pattern with the sink drips, pause, pause, pause, drip. Pause, pause, pause, drip. It began moving in sync with Peter’s finger tapping in the kitchen, pause, pause, pause, drip, tap. Pause, pause, pause, drip, tap. 

What deity did you piss off to put you in this position? 

The words echo as your hand pushes the carpet one way, darker, the other way, lighter. 

“Y/N and Peter. Y/N and Peter. Y/N and Peter.” 

It happened Wednesday, and now it was Saturday. 

“I have some news. We are breaking down points in history and colliding them with story acts. You have all been assigned a partner and will have two weeks to complete it. We finish next Wednesday, but you’ll be getting your partners today and you can start working on it now. Get an idea, I’ll be passing out sheets with different points in history you can pull from.” 

She rolled her eyes when the class groaned, “Yeah, yeah. If you want to let the creativity flow feel free to pull a moment on your own. I’m letting you guys take the rein on this, have fun! Express yourselves!” 

You blew a heavy breath, you haven’t paid attention in months and now you were being thrown into a massive assignment. Mrs. Bender approached the front of the room and grabbed a stack of papers. “Y/N, Tonya, please pass these out to your classmates.” 

The stack was split and she handed you each one and you both went to separate sides of the room. You started in front and worked towards the back, the fourth table was MJ and Peter. You gave one to MJ and met her eyes, “Hi.” She smiled back, “Hey.” 

You let one fall to the middle of the desk, the paper sweeping the air before sliding across the slick black table and falling to the ground. You shrugged at the paper on the floor and shrugged, “Oops.” You stepped on the front of the page and made your way to the table behind them. 

Peter watched MJ smirk, he turned his gaze to the ground and picked up his paper stamped with your shoe print. 

“These will be your partners, no exchanges or substitutions allowed. Tonya and Brent. MJ and Kate. Yousif and Rusty. Drea and Drake. Cory and Becca. Y/N and Peter.” 

Your eyes shot up to the room, your heart was racing. This couldn’t be happening, not him. Not your ex, you literally begged him to hook up and he left. You told him everything was a front, that you still lo- No. Don’t think about that. 

This was a nightmare. Your cheeks burst with heat, your heart hit your rib cage with each thump, your palms become sweaty on the tabletop. You had to keep swallowing the saliva building in your mouth, scared that you’d puke if you stopped. 

The teacher just kept going like she didn’t end your world. 

“Dustin and Vanessa. Forrest an-“ You cut her off and shoved a hand in the air before speaking. 

“No! No, No, Absolutely not!” Peter’s head shot to yours. The other students were already moving around matching up with their partners. 

“What was that?” The teacher stopped her rambles. 

“Please. Anyone else, I’ll do anything. I’ll clean your car, I’ll do Saturday school until the end of year! I’ll even stay late and grade your last classes work! Please, anything!” You pleaded. 

“No exceptions, it’s not fair to everyone else.” She shrugged her shoulders and tried to continue. 

“What if I work alone?” You stood at your desk. 

“No.” She flipped her grade book. 

You huffed and swore under your breath. 

“Fine! I won’t do it then!” You threatened no one but yourself. 

“Ms. Y/N do I need to remind you of your circumstance? You don’t do this project, you’re out of here. Permanently.” She raised an eyebrow and taunted you, she wanted to see how you would react. 

You threw your hands up and slumped back on your seat. “Yeah! I know! I know!” 

Even being paired with Peter wouldn’t make you talk to him, and bless his heart for trying. He’s tried cornering you in school, he’s tried calling (and was ignored immediately), he even showed up at your window but all he received was an unwavering middle finger until he slowly crept away. 

His last ditch was a text, ‘Hey. I know you don’t want to talk to me, but we need to get this done. Come to mine tonight?’ 

He wasn’t expecting a response, and you didn’t give one. You just showed up. 

“Water?” 

He held out a bottle and you sniffed, dragging your knee to your chin you turned the other way. Peter placed it next to you anyways. 

“You sure you don’t wanna sit up here?” Peter tapped the space next to him on the bed. 

“I’m fine where I am.” The first words you spoke to him all week and they were just as distant and cold as when you told him you hated him. He never really believed that, but now he was. 

“I can pull my desk chair over, or I can get one from the kitchen-” 

“I said I’m fine.” You cut him off and listened to the empty space, you relied on the drips like a metronome. Then the hum of the AC, and new to the mix was Peter breathing. It wasn’t loud but it was steady, something to build off of. If you tried really, really hard maybe you could hear the blood pumping in and out of his heart. 

“What do you smell right now?” The carpet was leaving an almost itchy feeling on your fingertip but you kept swirling it, scared if you stopped they would shake. 

“Uh, I don’t know. I can smell your perfume, and I think Mr. Denison next door is making cookies or banana bread.” Confused. He was confused. 

“Not like that. Me.” 

Peter’s eyes widened.  It was very rare for you to ask him to use his senses on you, it’s not like he had a choice, it would happen regardless. But he respected that you didn’t want to know, or didn’t care to, so unless you asked he never brought it up. 

He breathed out slowly and took an inhale at the same rate, he looked at you and frowned slightly. You wouldn’t look at him still, you were turned from him and curled inwards trying to get as far away from him as possible. 

“Scared. Nervous. Anxious. Upset. Sad. Hurt.” 

You let out a small laugh. 

“Was that Spidey, or was that your intuition?” 

“A little of both.” 

Drip, pause, pause, pause, drip. 

“I’m sorry, by the way. I don’t think I ever told you that, but I am.” 

You looked at him for the first time in a week, you actually recognized him as a human. 

“For what?” 

“Hurting you. Breaking up with you, making you hate me. Fuck, I don’t know, Y/N. Can I just give you an umbrella apology?” 

You nodded at him. 

Drip. 

“How would we move past this?” 

“What do you mean?” Peter can’t help his spirits get slightly lifted at that. 

“I don’t know how to look at you and not be overwhelmed with sadness, Peter. You were my entire fucking life and it was smashed in one night. And I know you’re trying to fix it, and I really want you to. I want to go back like nothing ever happened but it did. It did happen, and you really, really hurt me. So how do we get past this?” 

“How can I give you that kind of power again?” You added with a whisper, you laid a cheek on your knee and closed your eyes. 

Drip. Pause, pause, pause. Drip. 

Peter breathes once, twice, three times, drip. Peter rubs his pant leg against the bed, the comforter ruffles, he breathes, drip, drip, drip. 

You can’t stand it anymore, now you understand why Chinese water torture is mind exploding. 

“I don’t know, but it’s not up to me anymore.” Peter’s turn to keep his sight from you. 

“What does that mean?” You nearly wince at your voice. Why did you sound so sad? 

Peter looks you in the eye, it wasn’t his decision anymore. That much was clear. 

“I hurt you, I broke your trust. I did the worst thing to you I could’ve ever done. It’s up to you now, what do you want? Do you want to be friends, never speak to me again, or maybe somewhere in the middle?” 

You chew your bottom lip and look his face over. 

Drip. 

You think of each time you’ve kissed his cheeks, each time you’ve counted his freckles while he’s slept, each time you traced over his features, every moment of him being yours came in a flash. 

Drip. 

More than anything in the world, you missed loving him like you could lose him. There was nothing so delicate and private in the world. 

Drip. 

“I know what I want.” The words were a whisper, scared to say them aloud, scared to whisper them into admission. 

“Tell me.” His tone matched yours, he was just as scared to hear it as you were to say it. 

Drip. 

“I want you to win me back.” 

You can’t remember the last time you’ve seen Peter smile like that, not since he was yours. 

His teeth sunk into his bottom lip failing to catch the growing grin. 

“I can do that.” He nods. 

 “I can do that.” 

—-------------------

Flowers everyday. 

That’s how it started. 

On Monday they were purple Hyacinths, left outside your front door with a small handwritten note: Sorrow, please forgive me. 

You’re reminded of every time Peter’s tried to get your attention with a wave or a smile or even tried to offer an olive branch by walking you home. 

Tuesday they were red Tulips with a similar note attached: Believe me, my feelings are true. 

You know he’s sorry, he’s made that much clear. 

Wednesday they were Violets: I’ll always be there.

Even when you haven’t wanted him. 

Before the presentation in class Hydrangeas were left in your locker: Good luck and fortune.

Thursday were mixed Zinnias: Thinking in memory of an absent friend and lasting affection.

He’s missed you just as much as you’ve missed him. 

Friday was a Gladioli: Give me a break, I am really sincere.

He’s asking you to trust him one more time. 

Saturday morning there were several flowers and notes outside of your window. 

A Coreopsis: Always cheerful.

You’ve made him so happy.

A Lily of the Valley: A return to happiness, you’ve made my life complete. 

You give him something to look forward to.

A Dandelion: Faithfulness and happiness.

Something he can rely on. 

A Lavender stem: Admiration. 

He doesn’t know how someone could be so perfect.

A red Carnation: My heart aches for you. 

He hasn’t ever known pain that ebbs so deep into him.

A Sweet-Pea: Thank you for a lovely time. 

You gave him a true meaning in life, not Spider-Man, Peter. You gave Peter a meaning.

A Forget-Me-Not: True love and memories. 

It really was true love, there was nothing more pure about it.

A Narcissus: Stay as sweet as you are. 

He can only hope he hasn’t damaged that.

A Petunia: Your presence soothes me. 

You have a presence that calms him, it’s a talent only you and Aunt May possess. 

A Camellia: I’m longing for you. 

He’s thought of you everyday since he ended it. 

A Daffodil: You’re the only one, the sun is only shining when I’m with you. 

Everything's better when you’re around.

Finally a Primrose: I can’t live without you. 

Because he really can’t.

On Sunday you caught him in the act. 

Dressed in dark tan khakis, a blue plaid button down and a dark gray jacket. His Nike shoes matched the hints of dark blues in his shirt, his hair looked extra fluffy today. You always begged him to grow it longer, sometimes he would appease you and wait an extra week or two before he chopped it but the past month he’s let it grow, long curls framed his face and all you wanted to do was tangle them around your fingers. 

“Careful, another bouquet and I’ll have to start my own nursery.” You chided him and grinned when his cheeks flushed briefly after he slightly jumped unaware of your lurking presence. 

“Were you waiting for me?” His hand was behind his back, you were eager to see the flower of the day. 

“Maybe. It’s impressive how you’ve dropped them all week without me seeing you. Are you using your stealth secrets on me?” 

“I could be, It’s better to see your reaction when I’m not in front of you. It seems more authentic.” 

“Oh, when you’re not in front of me? Does that mean you’re lurking around watching me like some kind of stalker?” You grinned at his caught look, he didn’t mean to let that slip, but he was going to lean into it. 

“I just want to make sure you get them, I don’t want some sorry guy coming by stealing my tactics.” 

“Have you watched me before? Cause I swear I’ve got the feeling someone is just out of sight on a roof I can’t see.” You hinted at his alter ego and watched him nonchalantly shrug. 

“Sometimes. Mostly at night when you were alone, I used to walk you home, you know. What if some guy from Ryker's got out and thought you were an ex that locked them up and you got stabbed to death?” 

Your eyes widened. “Is that the stuff you worried about when we broke up?” 

We. No, ‘when you’, it was we. 

“Like a mantra.” 

A frown crossed your face. “Here I was worried you weren’t going to know how to put your own band-aids on, nice to know you are still obsessed over me.” 

“Always have, always will.” He smiled and remembered why he was here. 

“I have something for you.” 

You grinned and made grabby hands, “Lemme see it!” 

“It’s not a flower.” 

You pouted and booed. 

“Let me give you mine first then.” 

Peter’s eyebrows raised, “You have something for me?” 

“Yeah, hold on.” You dipped back into your room for a moment and emerged with a small pot, three short green stalks were bunched together. You held it out for him to grab, one hand was kept behind his back. 

He looked at you and waited for the explanation. 

“It’s a lucky bamboo. It symbolizes growth and renewal, something for a new life stage. I thought it was fitting.” 

He hugged it tight to his chest, “Thank you. I love it, I am gonna nurture the fuck out of this. His name is gonna be Groot, thank you.” 

“You’re welcome.” 

You both just smiled at each other for a moment too long, almost forgetting why you were both here. You think Peter lent in for a second before jumping slightly, he remembered why he came. 

“Here’s yours.” 

Peter passed you a folded up paper, you looked confused but grabbed it from him. You looked up to catch him grinning at his branches and he whispered something to the green before nodding at you to unfold the paper. 

Inside were two printed tickets to the Planetarium, you gasped and dropped your jaw. You looked towards him and he was already smiling at your reaction. 

“Oh my god, Peter!” 

You rushed forward with a squeal and crushed him in a hug, both of your arms wrapped around his, he let out a ‘oof’ and pulled one arm from under yours to wrap it around you. You pushed forward just a little closer, resting your cheek against his chest, he felt warm and sturdy. No matter how much time passed you missed this the most, just feeling him, and feeling like nothing could harm you. 

“Did I do good?” His words felt like vibrations in your cheek. 

“Amazing!” You grinned up at him and pushed yourself to your tiptoes to place a kiss on the corner of his mouth. 

He paused for a second, shock in his system. You kissed him. Well, not a full on kiss, but it was a hint of one. 

“Well then, would you like to go on a date with me?” 

You smiled so wide you bit your bottom lip trying to rein it in. 

“I would love to.” 

-------------------------------------------------

A date it was. 

Peter pulled out all the stops, he took you to a nice dinner, one where they had a candle on the table and ketchup wasn’t available. He even looked over the menu beforehand and let you know what he thinks you would like, not that you can’t make your own choices but new restaurants always give you a little anxiety. You were unsure what you would like and felt like you were wasting time looking over the menu rereading the same summaries hoping one would jump out at you. 

Then after dinner he gave you his jacket, walking down the street you were confused when he didn’t call for a taxi but followed him anyway. You looked down at his hand next to yours and grabbed it, then he intertwined them and pulled you to the side of a building. You looked up at the sign and then him. 

“Chocolatier?” 

He pulled an eyebrow up, “You didn’t think I forgot about dessert did you? 

“I’m getting two slices of cake.” You moved to pull him inside, he followed behind and you both paused at the door inhaling the sweet scent blowing in your faces. 

“As long as I can get a bite.” 

“We’ll see.” 

After dessert he took you to the planetarium and you gazed up in awe at the constellations. The seats were recliners and lent all the way back so you had undivided attention at the ceiling. 

“Which one is that?” You pointed up at a stack of stars, they almost made the shape of a person. Peter followed your finger up, “That one?” He pointed at the same star, you nod. 

“Andromeda. A Greek princess.” 

“Ooh. Wait, where is the big bear and little bear?” You moved your head but couldn’t place it, those were your favorites. 

Peter grabbed your hand and pointed up at them, he traced the stars with your finger, “Big bear,” then lowered your hand, moved it slightly and traced again, “Little bear.” A soft smile crossed your face, you always thought of those as you and Peter, you followed him around mimicking his antidotes and sidekicking every bit of the way. 

You moved in closer to Peter and turned halfway to rest your head on his shoulder, looking up at him from your eyes you shuffled in deeper. 

“Tell me all about the ones you know.” 

And he did, he took you through each one slowly, sometimes picking your hand up to point at them and trace the lines so you knew exactly what he was talking about. Peter spoke quietly and calmly, you were the only ones in the room but it still felt extremely private, this was a moment for you and him only. 

“This one is Apus, the bird of paradise. This one is supposed to be the beak, and this one is the tail. And this one is Ara, it’s an altar that was used by Gods before battle with the Titans to vow their allegiance.” He traced the outline and you stared in awe. 

“And this one here is Aquila,” 

“It looks like an eagle.” 

“It is! Look at you, smartie.” 

“He was the retriever of Zeus’s thunderbolts.” 

“Oh! And look at this one here, this one is really cool. It’s Antlia, and it’s my favorite because it literally translates to-” 

You stopped him with a kiss. 

It was slow, you moved against each other for a minute or two. You weren’t all over each other, it wasn’t full of passion and heat. It was a kiss that meant more than that, it was trust, it was giving, it was kind. It was love, you both felt it. 

“Air pump. It translates to air pump.” 

His first words when you broke away, his eyes blinked open slowly and he looked towards you. You couldn’t help yourself and lent in for one more, it was shorter. Just a little longer than a peck. 

“What was that for?” Peter was breathless, he wasn’t expecting that. He wasn’t expecting anything like that for a while. 

“Because I think you’re lovely.” 

“That's funny, because I think you’re lovelier.” 

You frowned for a moment, you didn’t feel lovely. 

The past week you’ve done a lot of reflecting. You hadn’t been kind, or nice, or patient with Peter like he’s been with you. Instead you’ve been bitter, mean, and miserable. It wasn’t right, if you love someone you don’t treat them like that. 

“I’m not. Or at least I haven’t been. And, I’m sorry too, by the way.” 

“Sorry for what?” 

“Being the worst. I was so caught up in being hurt and mad at you I forgot you were hurting too. I think I forgot that even though you might have ended it, it hurt you too. And I’m sure I made it worse for you because I took all my hurt and anger out on you, I never should’ve said all those things. I should’ve never said I hate you, that was low and dirty of me. I don’t hate you, at all. I don’t think I ever could, actually. I just wanted to make you hurt like I did, but it made me feel worse because you didn’t deserve that. So, I’m sorry.” 

You blinked back tears, it was a good night so far and you didn’t want to ruin it with waterworks. 

“Oh, baby. C’mere.” Peter held you into him and kissed the top of your head. 

“It’s okay. I know you didn’t mean it, and it sucked but I get why you did it. You just wanted to make it even, doesn’t make it right but you needed to work through it. Just promise me you’ll never say it again, I don’t know if I can handle that again.” He pinched at your side and smiled when he made you giggle. 

“Deal.” You kissed his cheek and breathed in his neck, you missed his smell. 

“I missed you calling me that.” Your words were muffled, a vulnerable admission. 

“What, baby?” You nodded in his neck. 

“I can start doing it again, it’s yours anyways.” 

“I’d like that, Petey.” You smile pulling away.

Peter slapped a hand over his chest. “Be still, my heart.” 

“I thought you hated that nickname?” 

“I did. Until I didn’t hear it for four months.” 

You giggled and looked at the stars once more. It was a perfect night, but you couldn’t help but think about how many nights like this you’ve missed out on since things ended. 

“Can I ask you a question?” 

Peter picked your hand up and kissed the back of it. 

“Anything.” 

“Why did you end it?” 

Lips froze on your hand. It was obvious he wasn’t expecting that. 

“Baby, listen to me. Tonight was a good night, right?” 

You nodded. “The best.” 

“I don’t want to ruin tonight, and I’m not saying you are. I would be. We’ll talk about it, I promise. But I don’t want to tonight, is that okay?” 

“You would ruin the night?” 

“It’s hard for me to talk about it. No one knows the full story, and you’ll be the only one who gets it. I just don’t want to open that door tonight. Is that okay?” 

You wanted to ask why it was hard for him to talk about it, and why he never told anyone the real reason, but that would defeat the purpose of him not wanting to talk about it. 

“That’s okay. We’ve got nothing but time.” 

Peter looked at you for a second soaking your words in. 

“You sure?” 

You kissed him once more, a promise. 

“Positive. Now tell me which one that is.”

—————————————————

The next two weeks went by slowly, you never did get that reasoning. It wasn't an omission on Peter’s part but you’ve both been busy doing other things and it hasn’t really crossed your mind, and the times it did it didn’t feel like the right time to bring it up again. 

You slowly started to integrate your life back with Peter’s. 

It started with sitting with him, Ned and MJ at lunch, Betty too when she wasn’t in the TV room piecing together her next segment for the morning announcements. Then Peter started walking to class with you holding your books or backpack when it got too heavy, and then finally you let him sit next to you in shared classes again. 

“Psst. Peter.” 

He kept his eyes on the board trying to copy down the words from the slide before they disappeared, this teacher changed slides too quickly. You were trying to copy the last slide from his paper but his arm blocked off part of what you needed. 

“Peter.” You whispered again but he kept going, to be fair he did have a headphone in. He was having a bad sense day, everything was just a bit too much for him, which is why he’s been clinging to you all day. For whatever reason you always calmed it down for him, sometimes you made it worse when things were getting a bit too physical, but usually you calmed him. 

“Babe?” 

His head whipped to yours, that's the first time you’ve dropped that line on him. 

“Yes?” 

You pointed at your sheet where it dropped off and pouted, “Help.” 

He immediately moved his arm and pushed his paper towards you a bit more and watched as you scratched down his notes, someone coughed and his ears rang, then again, and again. He started to shake his leg, then someone started to sniffle, it felt like it was in his head. Without pausing you wrapped your left arm around his elbow and scribbled a bit faster, if he was focusing on something it made it a little easier. His foot stopped instantly, and the noises became more muffled. 

“All done. Thanks.” You pushed it back his way but kept your arm around his, he wouldn’t ask for it but you knew he needed it. 

“Anytime.” You know he means it. 

After the bell rang he stood pushing things in his backpack, you did the same and lingered for a moment, he grabbed your hand and walked with you out the classroom. 

“Would you like to go on a date tonight?” 

It was a Friday and last week he had taken you to the Zoo, it was becoming a weekly habit. Part of him trying to win you back, not that you would tell him but you think he already has. The point of this was to take it slow, you both know how this is going to end so there’s no rush. 

“What are you thinking?” 

“I don’t know, I was thinking I’d leave it up to you. Your turn to choose.” 

“Your house? We can have a sleepover and do movies, maybe you’ll let me do a face mask with you to put you back in my good graces.” You teased him lightly, he always gave pushback when you tried to do spa nights, but he would always give in without much of a fight. 

“Shh, be quiet. I don’t need people thinking I’m a softie doing spa nights with my girl.” He teased back, as if he would care if people thought he was softie. He was the biggest softie around you and that’s one of the things you loved most. 

“Your girl? Who, me?” You looked around and smiled when he wrapped his arm around your shoulder and tucked you into his side. 

“Of course, you. Who else could I want?” 

Later that evening you found yourself at the Parker household but it wasn’t so quiet this time, May was humming in the kitchen and upon you walking in she screamed and pushed Peter to the side. 

“Hugs, hugs! Peter move, let me at her!” 

May wrapped her arms around you in a vice grip scared you’d run away if she let go, she missed having you around the house. Peter had a pep in his step when he was with you but since things ended he’s been more melancholy and quiet, it doesn’t help that May has been berating him too. 

When he walked in after ended it with you she knew immediately something was wrong. She asked him outright, “What happened? What did you do, Peter? Please don’t tell me you did something stupid.” He did. He did do something stupid and admitted to it after sobbing into his aunt's arm for an hour.  

She waited two weeks before she started in on him, like at the store, “I have a feeling I need to get strawberry ice cream, but I can’t remember who for. Was it that girl that came around before you broke her heart?” And Peter would heavily sigh, “Yes, May. That’s her.” 

She just missed having you around, and seeing Peter so happy. 

“What are you doing here? Oh my gosh!” May was beaming looking between you and her nephew. 

“Well,” You looked to Peter and rested your hand on your stomach.

May let out a gasp, “Peter, I swear to god if you got her pregnant!” Even though Peter knows that's not the case he takes a step back for extra measure. 

“Ew! God no. I wouldn’t let him touch me like that, May. He’s gross.” 

“Hey!” A whine.

“We were paired for a project at school and started hanging out again.” You smiled at May, you missed her as much as she did you. 

“And you’re hanging out here?” May pointed at the floor, she can’t believe after a school project things were fine. 

You nod. “Yes. Peter is trying to win me back, it’s date night. He let me choose and I wanted to have a sleepover, I even talked him into a spa night!” 

Peter’s eyes lit up, you were letting him put the pieces back into place.

“Date night? Since when is there a designated date night?” May was sputtering. 

You look at Peter and think back, his face helping you form an answer. “Three weeks?” 

Peter nods. 

May’s jaw dropped, her nephew mentioned nothing of this. At all. 

“Peter! What the fuck!” 

He jumped, “What?” 

“What is right! You’ve been taking her out without me knowing? Why?!” May was in shock, she knows Peter knows how much she’s missed you, she bullies him every chance she gets. 

“I don’t know,” Peter shrugged but did know why, and May knew that too. She just stared at him with that mom look and he looked at the ground and continued before looking at you. 

“I know you missed her, May. I wasn’t sure how this would go, I still don’t. It’s not my decision at the end, I didn’t want to get you all excited just to tell you I failed.” 

‘Peter.’ You mouthed the words, he shook his head subtly. You caught it, it meant ‘not now.’

May let out a breath and slapped her hands on her pants. “Okay, that’s fair. You should’ve given me a warning before you let her in though, I nearly had a heart attack.” 

“And you my dear,” She spun to you and wiggled in joy once more, still amazed you were truly in the room, here for a rekindling. 

“Are more than welcome to stay the night! Do you have dinner plans, or any plans at all? I’m about to leave for work, is there anything either of you need?” 

“Thanks, May! Peter’s cooking for me tonight, he said he got a new recipe.” 

Peter cut off May’s impressed look, “It’s just a restaurant copycat, May. I’ve just never made it for her before.” 

“Is that why you got so many tomatoes at the store? Are you making your own tomato sauce!” 

“Oh my god, Peter.” You whined out at him, he cut his gaze towards you and grinned. He was down bad. 

“You’re making homemade sauce? That is so cute, c’mere.” You tugged at him for a side hug, not missing the way May’s eyes gleamed. 

“Well, I just cleaned the kitchen so it’s up to the chef now.” She throws a wink at her nephew, “It is so nice having some sunshine back in the apartment, I’ll see you both in the morning. Good night!” May placed a kiss to each of your foreheads and made a final goodbye at the door, you heard the click where she locked it on the outside. 

You were alone and excited, you didn’t plan on anything happening tonight and sure, you definitely missed Peter in that way, but seeing him so domestic you wanted to lay him down flat and make him a mess. 

He had changed into sweatpants, baby yoda printed socks poked out, and his white tee. You think he did it on purpose, he didn’t act like he did but he has to know what he’s doing. It seemed just a bit too tight, like he hadn’t worn it in a while and it just came out the dryer, it was snug across his chest and constricted around his biceps that flexed at every subtle movement of him mixing a pot of red. 

“I regret my choice for date night.” 

“Oh?” He looked sad, “We can do something else, what did you have in mind?” 

“Oh no, I am very much enjoying what I’m seeing. That’s the issue, Mr. Parker.” 

“That doesn’t seem like much of an issue to me, dear.” 

His back was turned to you again, he spoke a little louder to make up for his echo towards the stove. You were sitting on the kitchen counter next to the sink, feet swaying and slightly kicking the cabinet, if it was a few months ago Peter would scold you for kicking them. He would tell you May would beat you up and then he would have to beat May up for doing so, and then he would grab at your knees and stop them while he squeezed and you would laugh trying to peel his hands off. 

Tonight he was letting you get away with it, he’s been letting you do that recently. Small things that would’ve pushed him in the past didn’t get to him, or he was allowing it to happen so he didn’t push you too far with scolding. You chewed your bottom lip and watched him, he had a white rag thrown over his shoulder. You peered down to your right and saw the cheese grater and plate, he even was grating fresh cheese, he was going all out for you tonight. 

“I think it needs more oregano, or pepper. It’s missing something, what do you think?” He licked the corner of his mouth for any extra tomato sauce, his face scrunched in concentration. Peter held his hand under the wooden spoon lightly blowing on it before raising it to your mouth, you smacked your lips a few times getting a taste, “Add a little salt, then let me try again.” 

He nodded and you watched him add more of the flaked salt, then returned with another cooled mouthful. “Mm, I think you were right. It’s really yummy though.” Peter smiled and patted your knee, “Thank you, baby.” Your heart gushed and you yearned for a kiss, the rules were weird. You weren’t together yet, choosing to really make sure you can trust him. But, you also weren’t not together, he was taking you on dates, and doting, and really, really trying. 

You were dating, that was clear. And people who go on regular dates kiss, right? Not to mention you were dating for almost two years, you’ve kissed before. It wouldn’t be weird at all, and it hasn’t been. Each peck you’ve given had a hidden layer of lust, each time you met it was harder to pull away. Part of you was nervous for tonight, you were scared you wouldn’t be able to stop yourself. 

Especially when sharing a bed.

Gathering courage you slid to your feet feather light, you stood behind him for a moment before leaning in, sticking your nose in the crease of his armpit. “Hi,” He turned his neck to glance at you for a moment before turning his head back, “Hi, baby.” You moved to lay your cheek on his shoulder blade, hands coming around his chest and pressing into him, “You’re warm,” your words were slightly muffled from a squished cheek. 

“You light a fire in me, what can I say?” 

“Gross, you’re cheesy.” You moved to pull away but he caught your hands and held his against yours to hold them there, he was asking for an extra cuddle. You gave in, bear hugging his back, you squeezed tight, “Can we go out for ice cream after dinner?” 

“Anything you want.” 

“Anything I want, huh?” 

He hummed. 

“Can I ask a question?” 

“Shoot.” 

“Kiss?” 

Peter turned in your hold, “Pretty girl, you never have to ask for a kiss. Now, c’mere.” 

He leant to kiss you, his thumb rubbing at your cheek made you dizzy. It was luring you into a trap, you didn’t care. Peter broke first, “Good?” You blinked your eyes open slowly, “Another,” He gave you one more, you held on for a moment longer, he broke away again, he leaned away trying to find space, he needed to stir his sauce, it was almost at a simmer. 

You followed his mouth, a peck, “Baby,” another peck, “I gotta stir,” another, “Baby,” he laughed and drew his head back, you kissed his chin. “One more for good measure,” He rolled his eyes, but did it regardless, both hands cupping your face he squashed your lips in a playful kiss, pulling back with an animated pucker sound. 

“Now get back, menace.” 

Peter was finally able to focus on the main part of the dish, he flattened the protein with a tenderizer and started to grate the cheese. You wondered if it would be the wrong time to bring it up again, the ‘why’ question. 

“Is it a bad time to bring it up?” 

He paused for a split second, his focus reminded on the sharp grater. You watched the parmesan fall like snow. 

“You won’t be my girlfriend until I tell you.” 

It wasn’t a question, it was rhetorical. 

“No, I don’t think I will.” It was a sad smile. 

“The thing I’m scared of is,” He rolled the wrapping on the cheese down a bit further then started to grate again, “ that you won’t want to be my girlfriend once I tell you.” 

“Will I be mad?” 

“I think it’s more disappointment.” 

“Is it worse than breaking up with me?” 

“I,” He paused and knocked the extra cheese off the grater and leveled the bowl. He started once more, “I don’t know.” He looked at you and sighed. “I don’t want you to hate me.” 

“Is it that bad?” You can’t think of something that extreme, something only you and him would share. It was obviously extremely personal. 

Peter stopped and moved to his left to stand between your thighs, one hand resting above your knee. He tapped his thumb and thought of his words, how he would tell the story looking at you. 

“I uh, I got in a fight?”

He sounded unsure, you don’t think it was a lie but you question the choice of words.  

“When?” 

“A week before I ended it.” 

“Why?” A whisper. 

Peter bent his bottom lip with a nibble, he looked to the side and you saw moisture prick at the edges of his eyes. He shrugged, his voice cracked when he looked back at you. 

“You.” 

“Me?” 

“I, uh. It was, well I don’t. I just, I can’t right now. I can’t, I’m sorry.” 

You knew it was a bad time, and you get what he meant at the planetarium, it was a mood killer.  

“We don’t have to talk about it anymore tonight, Petey. Let’s drop it and forget it for now, we can unpack this later. Right now I just want to eat your yummy dinner and cuddle on the couch with a movie, is that alright with you?” 

“You sure?” 

“Positive. Give me a kiss, chef.” 

After dinner, which was delicious, you even ate scraps off Peter’s plate and then shoved yours into his chest and requested seconds that had him hopping to his own beat to the kitchen. Then dessert, which ended up with both of you choosing to swap ice cream for homemade cookies. 

Then you forced him to lay his head back into your lap while you applied a goopy paste that covered his face gray. 

“It’s cold” He whined  

“Cold is good, it shrinks your pores.” 

“My what?” 

You rolled your eyes, “it makes you look younger.” 

“I’m already baby faced, get it off!” 

When his phone timer went off you both tread into his bathroom to remove it, the space was slightly too small for two, both of you constantly bumping hips. 

“Get away from me, stinky.” Peter pulled into the corner while giving his chin circular motions after you scolded him for dragging his skin down. 

“If you want to shower with me just say so.” You winked at him in the mirror, you patted a towel on your face to remove any leftover moisture then waited to hand it off to Peter once he rinsed his own off.  

“That’s gross.” He still tore it from your hands and patted his own, softer after you screamed “Gentle!” 

“What is, the face mask?” 

“No, sharing a towel.” 

You pulled a neutral face, “Wait until you find out about all the other things we’ve shared.” 

“Is that a sexual innuendo? I’m calling HR.” 

A yawn exchange was currently in place, you started it. Then Peter gave one, then you copied, and because you yawned he did, you opened your mouth to rinse and repeat when he pushed your face to the side with his hand. 

“Stop it, go to bed.” His voice was teasing, “You stuffed me! I’m being lulled to sleep in the comfort of your arms.” 

You had both started on opposite sides of the couch, then you shifted to the middle, then stretched your legs out on his lap and he lightly scratched at your shins. Then halfway through the first movie you swapped so his fingers were scratching at your scalp. And somewhere between a bathroom break and the start of the second movie you sauntered back over to the couch but on Peter’s half. 

“Open sesame.” You made a parting motion at his crossed arms. 

He opened and dropped his arms like dead weight and watched as you pulled them in whatever position you liked, you finally settled on laying with your butt against his hip, one arm was crossed under your head as a pillow and the other was thrown over your chest. 

“Finished fluffing me?” 

“This pillow talks too much.” 

You both stayed like that for a movie and a half, Peter had to pee so bad his eyes were watering but he refused to break the cuddles. He never, ever wanted to leave your side again. 

“Go to bed, it’s okay.” He watched you wiggle up with a stretch. You picked up the soft throw blanket to follow in with you, you blinked at Peter and waited for him to rise. When he didn’t move you poked his shin with a toe, “Are you coming or staying up?” His eyebrows stretched, “You want me to come? I was prepared to crash in May’s.” 

“You think I chose a sleepover to sleep alone? Rude.” 

“No! I just didn’t expect to share a bed. I know we’re in this inbetween stage, I didn’t want to rush anything.” 

“Well, I want to share a bed. So, share a bed we may.” 

Peter rose in an instant, clicking the TV off with the remote, darkness enveloped the room, you blinked to adjust Peter’s frame. He rested a hand on your lower back to guide you into his room. 

“Yes ma’am.” 

He sunk into bed and reset the pillows, his jaw dropped when you raised your shirt above your head and ripped off a sports bra. 

“Oh my god, boobs.” 

“What? These old things?” 

“Boobs. I see boobs right now.” 

You giggled and gave your chest a little shake, his head darted back and forth with the movement. It was like shaking a treat at a dog. 

“Last time you saw them you wanted nothing to do with em!” 

He shook his head, “That’s because you were drunk, someone had to make a good decision.” 

“I wasn’t that drunk, I still remember that whole night and gag when I think about it.” 

Peter kept trying to go between your face and chest, he was doing his best at looking at you, but you saw the subtle drop down and back up. 

“Wanna touch them?” 

He gasped and his face lit up. 

“For real?” 

“For real.” 

Peter made grabby hands, and kissing sounds. You laughed at his childish demeanor and kneeled on his bed, chest in his face. 

“This is so much better than Christmas.” 

He chewed his bottom lip. 

“I’m gonna touch them.” 

“Go ahead.” You pushed your chest forward. 

“Like right now.” 

“I’m wondering why you haven’t.” 

“I’m waiting for you to say, “just kidding, you’re a perv.””

“Not gonna happen.” 

“Okay then, I’m grabbing them yiddies.” 

And he did, he grabbed one in each hand and jiggled, then giggled when they danced in his face.

You slapped his hands away, “oh my god, I didn’t think you would actually do it, you perv!” 

His face dropped with his hands, until he saw your smile. “Menace.” He grabbed them again, then couldn’t help himself. 

Mesmerized, his words were filled with filth despite the innocence of his words.

“So pretty, baby.” So soft, so quiet. 

Only for your ears.  

“Says you, handsome.” Just as private as his, he shook his head, almost disappointed that you didn’t get it. 

“Are you sure you wanna cover these back up?” He moved his hands to watch them bounce one more time before you slapped them off, pushing off the bed to slide your shirt back over.

Crawling back into bed next to him you moved to cuddle him, leg thrown over his hip, hand tracing his chest while your head rested on his quick heartbeat. 

“Can I ask you a question?” 

“Uh oh.” He twirled his finger around your hair. 

“It’s nothing bad! I swear.” 

This is pillowtalk. Peter loves and misses pillowtalk. 

“Alright, run it by me.” 

“Sex. Thoughts, opinions, ideology?” 

“Sex good.” 

“So insightful, that will be quoted in years to come.” 

“Why are you asking me about sex?” 

“This isn’t asking me things, time, it’s me asking you things, time.” 

He stayed silent, he wouldn’t respond to you without an answer. When he acted dominating it was always a rush. 

“Uh! I guess I mean, ya know.” 

He truly didn’t know, but if he knows you, and he does, he had to take a guess. 

“You want to know if I want to have sex with you?” 

“You don’t have to say it like that.” You muffled the words in his shirt. 

Why were you so coy? 

He laughed, “Baby, I don’t think there’s another way to say that.” 

You waited, he didn’t answer. 

“Well?” 

“Hm.” He poked your side, “You first.” 

You turned to his face with an open mouth, “No way! I asked you first.” 

He rolled his eyes. “No you didn’t, I had to guess what you were trying to ask.” 

“Same thing! You always know what I mean, that’s why you’re my boyfriend!” 

A pause, no one moved or said anything. 

“I mean, before you totally ruined everything and dumped me and now caused yourself to be in this period of space and time due to the choices you’ve made up to this point in life, which is why you are not my current boyfriend, but you were in a past timeline and a possible future timeline. Speaking of which, when you told May getting back together may fail what did you mean by that? You think I may not take you back, or this will end with us officially, officially ending it?”

Peter blinked slowly, that was so much at once.

“That was so much at once.” 

You looked around the room, word vomit was always a bad habit of yours. And usually with Peter, he had a way of getting you to spill your guts. 

“I appreciate the clarification on the boyfriend status, but you didn’t have to be so brutal, damn.” He took a breath, “Second, I am trying to win you back, not the other way around. You already have me, so when I say this may fail, I mean it. At the end of the day, you have final say and I really may have ruined this for real.” 

“I panicked.” You didn’t mean to sound so harsh.

“I know you did.” 

“I know what I can say back to that.” 

“What’s that?” 

“You’re not my boyfriend.” 

“I know, sweetheart.” 

“Yet.” 

“Oh, word?” He held up his hand for a fist bump.

“Word.” You tapped knuckles. 

“Now, what was that about wanting to rattle my bones?” 

You rolled your eyes, “Oh my god, just say fuck.” 

“I have never said fuck in that context, it’s dirty.” 

“Peter! Sex is dirty, and that’s okay. Just say it, c’mon.” 

“Not happening, it makes me feel weird. I feel like I got a pass from my parents to cuss one time, and it doesn’t feel right.” 

“Peter if you don’t say you want to fuck me right now, I will give you a purple nurple.” 

“I would love to, fu- Nope, not happening, it’s wrong.” 

“Of course it’s wrong, don’t be nice!” 

“I am nice! That's all I have, unlike you! Menace.” 

“That’s toxic, now say it with your chest. “I wanna fuck you.” Just like that.” 

“I wanna… you.” He turned his head and mumbled the middle part.

“You wanna do what?”

“Fu..” He mumbled the rest and coughed in his fist, cheeks pink. 

“One more time, I know you’ve got it in you.” 

He groaned and tugged at his curls, “Nope, moment is over. Not happening, not my fault you couldn’t hear me.” 

“Ugh, fine.” You pulled away from him to get one last bathroom trip in, then jumped into bed and laughed when Peter held his arms out like he could steady the bed. 

That’s something he would’ve scolded you for, he stayed silent. 

On the brink of total slumber Peter whispered in your ear, he was currently holding you from behind, his arms wrapped around you and he was pressed against you. 

“Can I be little spoon?” 

You throw his arm off you and turn around, his face right in yours. 

“Of course I can jetpack!” 

Then you press a chaste kiss to his mouth, you pull back before he can register. 

“Goodnight, Petey.” 

—---------------------------------------------

Why was everyone looking at you?

It felt like a movie, walking into school everyone had turned their head and watched you. 

It was a dream, it had to be. Maybe you forgot pants, nope, you have pants on. Maybe someone buzzed your hair off, nope, every hair was still there. Maybe it was someone behind you, nope, just you. 

You were beginning to feel self conscious, the pressure was on for no reason. 

Why was everyone looking at you? 

Oh. That’s why. 

Every single locker in the senior hall had a post it note.

Each square is a different color. 

Each had the same words. 

“Peter loves Y/N.” 

You slowly walked the halls in awe, looping around to see that he had actually put one on each cage of blue metal. 

Every locker had his declaration of his love, except for yours. 

No, your’s was an entire collage, canary yellow post its covered the entire thing, only your combination lock was visabile. In bright red, boldly written across, “I LOVE YOU.” Over, and over, and over again. 

MJ approached your locker and nodded her head impressed, she always told Peter actions speak louder than words, looks like he finally listened. 

Unable to break your gaze away for more than two seconds you glance at her and look back at what you consider an art piece. 

“Be honest,” You look at her once more, “Do you think he loves me?” 

And she laughs, a rare full body shake laugh. You can’t help but laugh with MJ, it was contagious. 

“If he does, he doesn't show it well.” 

You sigh and look around the hallway once more. 

“Yeah, it’s really hard to tell.” 

———————————————

“There’s my little artist!” You kiss your fingers at Peter. 

“Is that a short joke? You know I’m sensitive.” 

“And you know you’re a short king.” 

You set your backpack on the lunch table before sitting next to him, and stare in awe. It was the most beautiful thing you’ve ever experienced, you would be reliving this moment forever. 

How could you not make him yours right now? 

“So you noticed?” 

You laugh, “I’m pretty sure everyone did. I think Mrs. Bender was jealous.” 

“Okay, you need to stop with the Mrs. Bender isn’t getting laid.” 

“Well, she shouldn’t act like she’s not getting dick.” 

“But it’s okay when you do?” 

“That is so mean, you have no idea, you are so toxic to me.” 

“Am I wrong?” 

“Yes! I get dick!” 

“Oh yeah, from where?”

“I have hoes!” 

“Name five.” 

“Well, I have you.” 

Peter makes a buzz noise, “It’s been almost five months, plus that was when we were dating. I can’t be a hoe if we’re dating.” 

“You can absolutely be a hoe while dating.” 

“Sure. Four more names, I’m waiting.” 

“I mean, there was this one guy.” You look to the side, oh, you were being truthful. 

Peter thinks it was that guy you talked about at the party with your friends. 

“Nathan?” 

“How did you know?” You look back at his face, nothing really happened and you felt the need to tell him that. Even though you were broken up you didn’t want him to think of you like that. 

“Lucky guess.” He winked. 

If he was bothered he was playing it off good. 

“It wasn’t what you think.” 

“What do you think, I think?” 

“That I fucked him.” 

Peter winced, he hated the word. So vulgar.

“I didn’t say that.” 

“Would it bother you if I did?” 

Why did you want him to be bothered by that? 

“I don’t know, which is why I don’t think about it. We were broken up, I can’t hold that over your head. But it doesn’t feel nice knowing someone else got to see and feel the same parts I did.” 

“Have you hooked up with someone else?” Sure, try and level the playing field. 

“Nope. I am untainted, I was a good little boy.” He grinned at you proudly. 

“Can I tell you about it? It isn’t super bad, but I will throw in a PG-13 warning, depictions of sex.” 

Peter grumbled. 

“If you gotta.” 

“I just don’t want you to think I’m a whore.” You nibbled on your lip. 

“Pause. I would never, and if that’s why you want to tell me, don’t. If you want to tell me to share that information with me, because you want to, then please do.” 

“He sucked. I swear.” 

Peter nods, but it still feels like you’re trying to make him feel better. 

“I was a little too drunk and he was all over me, and I really missed you and he was there. He didn’t even kiss me, he asked me to suck him off and I refused, then he said he would go down on me so I would suck his dick, then I don’t know what he was doing down there but I swear he was just pretending, Peter. I felt nothing.” 

“Then what?” He waited for you to continue after he took a bite from his turkey and wheat.

“I got up and left. I was so pissed at my friends for letting me go into that room with him.” 

“I should get you an ‘I survived’ medal.” 

You laughed and rested your forehead on his shoulder, nodding before looking at him. 

“Question?” 

“Whatcha what?” 

You blinked and looked at his mouth. He deserved a kiss, he made you the school’s star for the day, every one knew how much Peter Parker loved you. 

“Kissy?” 

He shook his head lightly. 

“What did I say about asking?” 

You shrug, innocence taking front place. You always got so shy when you confessed something to him. 

“I like it, it feels special.” 

“Okay then, ask me anytime you want a kiss.” 

“I want a kiss.” 

“Well, that’s more of a statement than a question, but I appreciate the enthusiasm, so come closer.” 

And you did, where he met you with a kiss. This one felt normal, it felt like home. It felt like every kiss you had before the break up, it was beginning to feel like it never happened and you weren’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing. 

It sure did feel like a good thing though. 

“Hi cuties! Are we dating yet or still feeling it out?” Betty Brant broke up the kiss, Ned trailing in behind her with two lunch trays. 

“That line was so long, I am never doing Friday fish tacos again.” Ned sat down and wiped fake sweat from his forehead, his girlfriend sank next to him and pouted, “But I love Friday fish tacos.” 

Ned nods sternly. “I will be doing Friday fish tacos again.” 

Betty smiles and straightens her posture. 

“Dating?” 

Ned nods to you two turned into each other. 

“You look like a couple.” 

You wrap your hand around Peter’s arm. 

“Yeah, a couple of besties!” 

“Not the friendzone.” Peter’s voice is panicked. 

“Not dating?” Betty frowns, she is more invested in this than you thought. 

You smile at her for caring. “Not yet. I’m waiting for Peter to ask.” You bump your shoulder with his. 

Peter raises his head from his carrots, he crunches on one. 

“I don’t think I will.” You think he’s joking, but you quickly realize he’s not. 

“What do you mean?” 

He shrugs, “I think it would make more sense for you to ask me. I’m the one trying to win you back.” 

“Then ask?” You’re confused. 

“I feel like I already have, I’m just waiting on the yes.” 

Betty looks between you two frantically, Ned is busy assembling tacos. He’s used to these conversations between you two, he’s seen more than he can count. 

“But you haven’t asked since we started this.” 

“Okay, if I asked now would you say yes?” 

You chewed your lip. 

“I don’t know.” 

Peter raised his hand. 

“That is exactly why you should ask me.” 

“But that’s scary!” 

“You can do it, I believe in you.” 

“How about I tell you when I want you to ask me.” 

It’s almost the same thing. 

“No, I want you to ask me. I asked the first time.” 

“I don’t know how to ask you!” 

“Find a way, make it your way. There is no wrong or right way, just make sure you’re clear.” 

“Do you mean don’t accidentally say it like last weekend?” 

“There was a hint, yes.” 

You looked at Betty and winked. 

“What if I get down on one knee and ask?” 

“Okay. There is one wrong way.” 

“Super public too, maybe I’ll slide a twenty to the jumbotron camera guy at the Mets.” 

“Nightmare fuel.” Peter shuddered. 

Both you and Betty cracked up. 

—————————————-

May was shocked to see your face, yet again Peter has yet to fail to announce your presence. 

“Hi! What a surprise to see you again!” 

You melted into a hug, you spoke into her neck. 

“It’s a surprise for Peter too, I’m hoping for a surprise sleepover, I missed him a little too much tonight.” You whispered the last part, a little too much confession. 

“Always. Always, always welcome.” She placed a kiss on your temple and pulled you in. 

“Peter! Your girlfriends here!” 

“Yeah, Peter! Your girlfriends here!” You mimicked May’s words and shared a giggle. 

Peter emerged from his room, tugging up the zipper on his hoodie. His face went from shock to excitement, bouncing over to you. 

“Hi, handsome!” You held your hands out for a hug, his arms wrapping around your middle and squeezing tight, he rocked you back and forth. You weren’t the only one missing him more than usual. 

He pulled back and tilted his head, before he could ask a question you beat him to the punch. May watched in silence, happy to see the moment take place. The moment you fell back in love, truly and fully. 

“Kiss?” You puckered and waited. 

“Course.” He leant in, you settled for the quick pecks. 

Peter looked over your outfit and put the pieces together.

“Sleepover?”

You nod with a grin, “Sleepover!” 

Your eyes widened, you whipped your head at May. 

“Please, please tell me you got more popcorn.” 

“Ultimate butter. And, strawberry ice cream.” She smiled at your immediate grin. 

“I’m home,” you wipe a fake tear from under your eye.

You turned your head back to Peter with a puppy dog look, batting your eyelashes and clasped your hands and twisted.  

“Petey,” You drew out the name. 

“Baby,” He tilted his tone. 

“Can you please make me some popcorn, pretty please.” 

“Be honest, did you come here for the popcorn?” It was supposed to be a joke. 

You scoff, “Don’t be ridiculous, I only came for you. I missed you, best friend.” 

“That’s cute.” Peter grinned at you and looked towards May who was currently melting. 

“You’re cute,” You turned your head to May, “Close your eyes, May. Peter’s gonna lay one on me.” 

You made grabby hands for his neck to bring him closer, “It better be a juicy one, May isn’t looking.” And she wasn't, she chose to walk away for a moment, leaving you both for a joyful reunion, even if it’s only been a few hours. 

You asked, Peter delivered. His kiss left your head spinning, you always wondered if he felt the same. He sometimes would leave you in such a head high you felt like you were in a daze. 

“Do you feel like that after a kiss?” You were so loopy you forgot to share what you were thinking.

“Like there’s nothing else like that feeling, it feels so warm and comforting. Like, it really feels like total love, and I swear you make me feel high sometimes, it’s like time stops.” 

“I know what you mean, it’s like no one else but us matters.” 

“You are the only thing that exists for me in that moment, and there is nowhere else I’d ever want to be.” 

Peter groaned, “Come on now, how am I supposed to follow that one up?” 

You grinned, “You can start with making me some popcorn.” 

—————————————

It was only a matter of time. 

Peter was already yours, all you had to do was ask. The only thing holding you back was the why. 

It had to happen soon, you would slip and you swore to yourself you wouldn’t be his girlfriend again until he tells you why you have to ask him to be yours once more. 

Winter break was taking place, and you were currently on Peter Parker's lap grinding down on fleece pajama pants while he was gripping at a breast kissing down your neck while you groaned and tug at his hair. 

There was absolutely nothing wrong with sharing personal wants with a person you desire. 

“Is that what you say to make yourself feel better about sucking my dick?”  

“Oh, so you can say that but not ‘I want to fuck you?’” 

“Yes.” 

“Oh my god, Peter.” 

Sex started a week or two after that last sleepover, it was getting cold and you begged for more warmth even when tucked into his side, and so you backed up into him, butt against his groin, that was normal. 

Except his hand was squashed down in the middle, so you dug one hand behind you trying to lift it out the way as you scooch, back, and back, and back, and oh, there it was. 

It was pressing harder into your back, you wondered if you should pull away, wake Peter up or see how far it would go if you fell into it casually. 

You rub, you grind, you feel Peter’s hand grab tightly at your hip to hold it steady. 

“Baby?” It was warning, his voice was dull and rough, you were the first thing out his mouth. 

“Yes?” It was a whisper, you knew what you were doing. He could hear that too. 

“Do you know what you’re doing?” His grip faltered under a hard pressed grind, he groaned and pressed your hip away. 

“Yes.” You grabbed at the hand on your waist and pulled it up your shirt, his cool hand sent chills up your chest. 

“You want me to take care of you?” The switch, from innocence to dominant, playful to serious. This was your Peter. 

“Please,” It was a whimper. 

“Just lay right there, I know what you want.” 

He started to press kisses down your neck disappearing below the sheets, kisses never stopped. 

And he did know what you wanted, he always did. 

Always, always, always. 

At that moment you only had one question. 

‘What’s the point of asking? He’s already mine anyways.’ 

Now, it was bleeding into day three of living at the Parkers, it had been like this accidently since winter break started. May had gone away for a work trip and Peter’s place became a crash pad, it was just one night, and then one more and it’s probably going to be one more tonight too. 

“Peter…” You sighed off the words, his kisses coming to a stop. 

He grinned up at you, and as lovely as this was you didn’t want to miss the parade down a couple blocks. 

“I want you to do something for me.”

His eyes widened, his voice in a soft hush. 

“Anything.” 

“Say, say you wanna fuck me,” 

Peter groaned and tossed you off his lap. 

“You could’ve just said you didn’t want to be late to the parade, but no.” 

“God you are so in tune with me, it’s such a turn on.” 

“Yeah, yeah. Butter me up now so I’ll give in and spend twelve bucks on a churro for you.” He waved you off and stood swapping pajamas for denim. 

“But they’re filled with chocolate, Peter!” 

“You’re lucky I love you.” He kissed your forehead and moved past you to look for a warmer jacket, his words lit a fire in you. 

It’s obvious he loves you and while you haven’t said the words back you know he knows you do too. He’s been more giving with the words of affection, each time felt like a secret. Like, of course he does but, he doesn’t have to share that with you. 

“Again,” He turns and tilts his head. 

“Kiss?” He approaches to peck at your forehead, you go to step back but let him place one more. 

“No.” 

“No?” 

“Again.” You repeat the words. 

“Kiss?” You step back this time, “No, again.” 

His eyes brighten, “Oh, I love you.” 

You bite your bottom lip, “One more time?” 

“I love you!” He cheers the words and pulls a beanie on. 

“Peter,” You pause, you weren’t sure what he thought it would mean if you said it back. 

“I know, I know you do.” 

—--------------------------------

The parade was packed, there were rows of people pressed into the barricade. 

Mostly families, moms and dads and grandmas had babies and toddlers rested on shoulders or a hip so they could get a good glance at Santa when he rode by. Rows of streets were blocked off, each street off the main parade route was filled with food trucks and popup booths of home-made crafts. 

Peter and you strode hand in hand down each street, on one he bought you hot chocolate, which you shared. The next you got your churro, which you shared. One of the streets you passed a small canopy with homemade christmas tree ornaments, there was one in decorated ceramic. A delicate Lily of the Valley decorated the front and the year was painted in black and circled. 

It felt like the breath was knocked from you, you remembered the meaning when Peter gave you one, a return to happiness. There was no clearer message from the universe. 

“Babe?” You called out for your other half, who had slipped away looking for anything May would find special. 

“Yeah?” He was calling from the otherside, his head was stuck in a bin shuffling through miniature stuffed bears.

“C’mere. I found something.” 

You felt his hand press against your lower back, his chin sunk to your shoulder. 

“Look.” You raised the string and watched as it slowly twisted in the wind, his eyes staring until they lit with recognition. 

“Holy shit!” Peter reached his hand out to grab it, he had to feel it. It was real. 

“We have to get it, right?” Both of you spoke at the same time. 

You flushed pink, Peter grinned and poked your side. 

“Hey, man! How much is this one?” 

You watched and played with Peter’s gloves while he interacted with the man. He approached with a proud smile and a small black bag, he waved the receipt in his hand and stuck his hand out to yours. 

“Can I ask a question?” 

“You know, one of these days I’m going to ask that back.” 

“And I’ll answer just like you do.” 

“Yes, dear?” 

“Can I have a kiss?” 

“Oh, you.” He grumbled and pulled you in regardless, his nose was cold on your cheek, when you pulled away you rubbed your face against it to help warm it up some. 

“Can I tell you something?” 

“Anything,” He was walking you forward, looking for the best view that didn’t take away from any kid's sight. You were enthralled with his hand in yours, scooting you by other strangers. 

“I know how I’m going to ask.” 

He turned his head back at you in question, pulling you to the side after checking it was a good spot. 

“Ask what, baby?” 

“How I’m going to ask you to be my boyfriend.” 

“If it includes you getting on one knee I’m gonna say no.” 

“What if I get on both?” 

Peter pointed to the church both of your backs were resting against, your grin dropped shyfully. 

“I didn’t mean it,” You mumbled to the building. 

“Yes she did.” Peter whispered back, you slapped him on the arm. 

“Okay then, how?” 

“I can’t tell you that!” You sputtered at him, it was like telling him his birthday present. 

“What? Then why would you tell me that?” 

“Because I wanted to let you know I knew how I was going to do it.” 

“Oh I see, you were too excited to keep it a true surprise but you also want it to be surprising enough you won’t give me any true details.” 

“Remember what I said about what a big turn on that is?” 

Peter looked back at the church and rolled his eyes. 

“Told you she wasn’t kidding.” 

—------------------------------------

“Okay, let’s get it out of the way so this can really get started.” 

Peter looked around confused, your voice came from nowhere. Where were you? 

“Over here, nerd.” 

You poked your head out from behind a street sign, and watched as Peter threw his head left and right until he spotted you, the whites on his mask widening then dropping, you knew he was full of smiles. 

“Hi, baby!” Peter looked behind him once more before dropping to the ground below him, you ran into an alleyway behind him, and checked to see him slowly creep in behind you. 

“Kiss?” When he finally approached, he turned his head to check behind him and shook his head solemnly. 

“I don’t think so, baby.” 

You frown. Peter never refused a kiss request, in the suit or out. And, if you were far from the street, a quick kiss wouldn’t be the end of the world. 

“Why not? My lips are so cold, I forgot my boyfriend’s jacket.” You winked then corrected yourself, “I mean, my friend that is a boy.” 

“I, uh,” He looked around once more then quickly stepped up to you, he pulled his mask just barely above his nose then leaned in. You were unable to even press back into the kiss before he stepped away and returned his mask to a normal position, then he looked above him quickly. 

“Is everything okay?” You follow his eyesight and look around with him. 

“Yeah! Are you okay?” 

“I’m okay, are you sure you’re okay?” 

You watched as he kept looking around, he was almost acting like he was about to get caught doing something he shouldn’t. 

“Are you cheating on me?” He missed the tilt in your voice, just teasing. 

Peter whipped his head back at you, he started to pull at his mask but stopped himself and sunk it tightly back on his face. 

“What? No, not at all.” 

“You look like you’re about to get caught with me,” You poke at his chest and he steps back some, he doesn’t miss the flash of hurt in your eyes. 

This was the first time you’ve approached him as Spider-Man since the break up, Peter has tried everything possible to keep you away as the masked hero, and you hadn't noticed. Until now, because now you begin to wonder if this was why. 

Peter was acting awkward, and he never did around you. Around you, Peter was methodical, confident, suave and in love. Right now it seemed like he wanted you gone. 

“I mean, maybe. You never know who’s watching, I don’t need the media on the case of Spider-Man’s secret girlfriend.” 

You frown once more, you can’t press on it now. He would try and back himself into a corner where nothing was wrong, then that would cause him anxiety because he’s lying and you know how much he hates backtracking after a lie. 

“Do you want me to leave? We can talk later.” You question him and go to place your hands around his biceps but pull back halfway through, you caught the hint, he didn’t want you all over him right now. 

Peter caught your hands and pulled him then to rest on his chest. 

“You can touch me, baby.” He chuckled slightly, but you caught the nerves in his voice. 

“Give me a kiss and I’ll leave?” You blinked at your boy, he shook his head lightly. 

“You said you wanted to talk about something, what’s up?” 

“It’s okay, it doesn’t seem like you want me here right now.” Really, it was okay.

You know Peter is frowning behind his mask. 

“Of course I want you here, tell me what’s going on?” 

You moved your hands to his shoulders and gave a squeeze, then moved your head to look around. You didn’t get why he was on edge, but you respected it. 

Upon realizing no one was in the area you stepped in for a hug, immediately filled with warmth the shocking breeze seemed to dull outside. Winter break was ending soon and coming back to school with ‘I got a boyfriend for Christmas, what about you?’ seemed like the biggest flex imaginable. 

Instantly, Peter had his hands wrapped around your back. You felt the slight groove of his gloves running up and down your back, he leant his head into yours and you know if his mask was off he would be pressing kisses to the top of your head. 

After squeezing tightly one last time you pulled away and smiled brightly at him. 

“How much longer will you be out here?” 

“Probably a few more hours, I’ll be home around dinner.” He starts to slightly scratch down your arms. 

“Wanna go out?” 

You hum, “We can, I wanna talk to you first, though.” 

“Everything good?” He was asking if he was in trouble. 

“Yeah! Kiss?” 

“Tell me what’s up first.” He was bartering, he was on edge now. 

“Hm, nope. I’ll see you later, babe. Kiss?” 

“Are you mad?” He meant because you caught onto him not wanting you here. 

“Not at all, if it’s okay with you I was gonna head to yours and get a nap in before I see you later.” 

“Course it is. Need a key?” You gave yours back after the break up. 

“May’s not home still?” 

He shook his head, “Weather pushed back the flight, because of the ice she’s not sure when she’ll be back.” 

“Boo, key please.” You held out your hand and opened and closed it quickly, begging for the key. 

“Hold on, baby.” Peter stepped away and jumped halfway up the wall peeling off his backpack from behind a ledge, then turned to make sure you were looking. He started to lightly swing it your way letting you know he was about to toss it down, you readed your hands and yelled “Hut!” before he dropped it at you. 

You caught it with a grunt, then unzipped the small outer pocket and stuck your hand in searching for the key, startled you kept your hand in the same position as it was before Peter, quite literally ripped it from your hands. 

“Sorry! I have something in here you can’t see yet.”

He pushed the key in your hand and closed your fist around it. 

“Here, sorry again, baby.” 

You narrowed your eyes, “You’re lucky you’re cute.” 

“You’re cuter, otherwise I wouldn’t put up with that attitude.” You caught a wink through the mask. 

“Toxic. Give me a kiss, and make it a real one.” 

“As opposed to a fake one?” 

“You didn’t give me a good kiss earlier and you know it.” 

“Every kiss with you is a good kiss.” 

You whine at his flirting. 

“Please, Petey.” You pout, you know you’ve got him cornered. 

“Alright, c’mere.” He calls you closer with his hands and turns with his back to the street. 

“You wanna lift it or me?” 

You stare in awe, you missed pulling the mask off. 

“Me!” You tug it up past his lips, then roll it over his nose. But, at this point you might as well just take the whole thing off, right? Worth a try at least, you wrap your hands around his neck and pull him in for a kiss. His own hands wrap around your waist and pull you in tighter, you pull back slightly. 

“It’s rubbing my nose, hold on.” You tug it higher, and place one more kiss. 

Then you pull back again and slowly push it up, he tightens his grip but says nothing. 

This was one of those moments where he would scold you but was letting you get away with it, at this point you know it’s because he doesn’t want to mess anything up. You can’t help but wonder how long you can drag this out. 

In one movement you tug the entire thing off, “Hi, handsome.” 

“Hi,” He whispers. 

His curls framed his forehead nicely, you’ve been begging every week for him not to cut it. Your requests would soon be ignored, you knew Peter could only handle it so long before he chopped it. If you took a guess he would get it cut before school restarted, you only had one more week of his long hair. 

“I love your curls so much, please never cut them.” 

“I will absolutely cut them.” 

“One more week?” 

“You’re pushing it.” 

“For me?” 

“In that case, one more week.” 

“Thank you, babe.” 

You press a delicate kiss to his cheek and shiver slightly. 

“Can I have a kiss before I go?” 

He gives in, and it’s a nice kiss. You both lean in for a while before a sharp chill runs up your spine, you then decide it’s time to curl under his sheets and wait for him to come warm you up entirely. 

“I’m leaving, it’s cold.” 

You press his mask into his chest and lean in for one more kiss. 

“See you later.” 

“Wait! Can you take my bag?” He holds it out with a pleading smile, you tug it into your chest and contemplate tugging out his jacket and wrapping it around you. You could take the subway but despite the nips of cold you felt like walking, maybe so Peter knows you’ve gotten home safe. 

“Can I open it for your coat?” 

He said there was something in it you weren’t supposed to see yet, you would respect that. 

“Yeah, just please don’t go poking around the outside zipper.” 

“Got it, see you later!” 

You turned to leave, he called after you. 

“Bye, baby! Love you.” 

You didn’t think, it was automatic.

“Love you too!” 

You didn’t process what you said, it felt like second nature. 

Peter felt like he couldn’t breathe, he felt warm from inside out. From this point on nothing would get him down, the girl he loved with all his heart, the same girl that was hurt by him still loves him. He assumes he’s done it right, he finally thinks he may have won you back. 

You told Peter you wanted to talk, then said you loved him. 

Peter thinks he’s going to be a boyfriend before midnight hits. 

—------------------------

Time was ticking, you and Peter had been getting back into normal behavior, it felt as real as it did before the break up. And honestly, you kind of see it as a blessing. You don’t think you would’ve realized how much you mean to yourself if that’s all you didn’t have after he ended it. 

It hurt, alot. No one talks about how physical break ups can feel, you feel them in your gut. Stomach twisting at every end, like a small man is twisting knots in your intestines.  Then in your chest, the worst kind of heartburn alive eats at you, red searing hot pain that bleeds down through your body. It feels like every heart string is being pulled and snapped with each release. It affects your senses too, nothing sounds or tastes good anymore, at least not when Peter didn’t make or suggest it. Your eyes felt like there was nothing to focus on, your ears felt clogged, no one's words meant anything unless they were coming from Peter. You felt numb to the touch, so cold all the time, no one to warm you.

Heartbreak is something you would truly never wish on your worst enemy. 

But now, everything tastes just a little bit better. And your heart still hurts some, but it’s because it beats a bit faster when Peter’s around. And your stomach wasn’t filled with knots but flutters, not nerves but excitement. Your ears came attuned to listen for Peter’s hums or muffled songs under his breath, you listen for his late night whispers about what the writer’s should’ve done for that episode, or you listen to him lightly snore in the quiet hum of his room in the middle of the night because he’s there, and you’re there. And you’re not so cold anymore, chills still happen but it’s no longer a to the bone chill. It’s a, this is chilly, but I have someone to warm me backup at home. 

Peter felt like a constant hug. 

You’re pretty sure that’s love.

And if you loved him he should be your boyfriend, but to be your boyfriend again he needs to explain why it ended. You were slowly breaking down that wall, you’ve asked yourself for weeks now if it was that important, but you know it is. Because, why else have you held out so long?  

You don’t think in your heart everything could be forgiven without the why. 

That’s why you were here tonight. 

Peter came in around eight, for a moment you think he forgot you were here. He entered through the window, because you had his key. Then immediately ripped his mask off, slammed the button on his chest and kicked the suit away before groaning and stretched to the ceiling. 

“Hello, Clarise.” 

He jumped then smiled, “Hi, baby!” 

Peter looked over at you swaddled in his bed, now sitting his dark blue comforter swarming your body. Cheeks tinted due to the warmth but you refused to move, choosing to instead take sips of water from the bottle on his nightstand. 

“Good nap?” 

You hum and copy his stretch, “So good, did I get you those boxers?” You think they were a just thinking of you gift, they had little calculators on them. 

He looks down, “I think so, what did you do today, little miss?” 

You yawn, still blinking the sleep away. “I used your laptop for Netflix.” 

“Please don’t tell me you used my account.” 

“Of course I did, what’s yours is mine.” 

“You always mess up my recommendations, I just got it off of reality tv.” 

“And now it’s back.” 

Peter just blinked blankly at you. 

“I think it’s cute that you still had the passcode set to my birthday.” 

“Of course I did, they’re the only numbers burned into my brain.” 

“If you changed it I think I would’ve lost it, I mean full blown cry.” 

“Nope, if I got a new girlfriend I would have to come up with some cover story for that.” 

“You would let other girls use your Netflix?” You pout and wobble your lip. 

“I let you, don’t I?” Peter walks around the room and grabs his towel hanging on the other side of his closet door. 

“Well, yeah. But I’m special.” 

“If it makes you feel better, you would always be the one that got away. No girl could live up to that.” He shrugs and throws his towel over his shoulder. 

“And you would have to die alone?” 

“I would have to die alone.” 

“No other option?” 

“None.” 

You turn your head and nod, he’s great at winning the boyfriend tests. 

“Shower?” You nod at the towel, he starts to make his way to the bedroom door. 

“We can get food after, you decide.” 

“Cook, take out, or dine in?” 

“You choose.” He grins at you and turns to head to the bathroom.

“My choice?” You call after. 

“Yours.” 

You wait until you hear the shower start, then throw off the blankets and race down the hallway.

“I’m choosing a shower with Peter!” 

—-------------------------------------------

I wish it didn't make me cut it off here, don't worry, final part is coming!

[anemonelovesfiction]

How To Make A Net

Rotxo x Human! Y/n

If y’all havent noticed I love writing x human reader stuff, idk why, I just do. Please remember that this has smut in it and if it has smut, the characters are of age! And if for some reason I ever forget to mention it with the metkayina characters I Always make sure to express that they have tattoos somewhere

Unless stated otherwise, Pandora has breathable air for the human character. Reader is AFAB! This isn’t proofread at all so sorry for any mistakes I just wanted to post this to focus on another fic 😉😉

P in V, thigh riding, fingering, oral, lotsa stuffs

Word count: 6.1K

Noticing him was easy. He was kind, timid, but sweet. I would notice how he’d almost always drop his three younger sister off to their lessons before going off to do a bit of dive work or hunting on his own. He’d typically started providing for his family on an occasion since his fathers injury. He was always thinking about other people and constantly looking out for everyone. It made my heart race when he’d ask how everyone was- including me. Even if I was an outcast for the most part, due to being human, but he was nice enough to ask.

I sigh as I’d allowed myself to continue spacing, daydreaming was not on the schedule for today and I’d known that since waking up, but sometimes couldn’t stop myself whenever there was a small break. I sighed while picking up the basket of fruits I’d gathered for the party.

“How are you still on your second basket?” Kiri asks as she hands me another empty one.

“I’m human, Kiri,” I remind her and she shakes her head.

“You’d be on your fifth one by now. You always race with Spider, wheres your head at today?” She asks while grabbing two empty baskets from my pile- which was less than what anybody else would be assigned. Some days I’d go above and beyond and collect as much fruit as any other Metkayina, but they knew humans limits were below theirs and tried not to overwork us. She starts climbing the tree’s to collect more of their fruit, taking her hunting knife out of its holder, and rustling through the leaves.

“Why are you helping me, you have your own chores to-“

“I’ve finished them.” She comes down with a handful and fills up half the basket and I’m the slightest bit pissed that I couldn’t do that.

“How are you able to do that? I wish I had your body.” I start climbing up the tree next to hers. If we were being honest, I’m sluggish compared to Kiri, but if you compare me to any other human, I’m quick.

“My size helps, but your body is nothing to despise, Y/n.” Kiri smiles. I can see Rotxo coming from behind her with a net in his hands, no doubt coming to ask Kiri for help again. I can’t help but look down at his thighs. They had tattoo’s on them which was rare for the men to have as they usually had face and arm tattoo’s.

“Hey Kiri, could I ask for your help?” He’s so sweet when asking and patiently waits for her response.

“What’s wrong with it this time?” She asks as she places her hunting knife back in its holder, holding her hands out for him to show her.

Kiri was an amazing weaver, but was better at making blankets or even shawls, like the one she most often wears around her shoulders during the cool mornings, but she’s hit or miss with nets. Tuk is surprisingly very skilled but has no patience to weave one unless she wanted to, she has an affinity for making necklaces, armbands, and other jewelry. The armband I had was one she made for me when we still lived with the Omaticaya, she made a matching one for Spider.

I resist the urge to jealously roll my eyes and decide to let them have their privacy as I climb the tree, I have great balance and managed to pull the fruit from the tree, cut the stem to get it off, and climbed halfway down before tossing it into the basket making sure not to do it from too high as it could bruise and ruin the fruit.

“I’m telling you, it’s not worth salvaging if every few days another piece breaks off.” Kiri says as I head back up and I wanna punch the air so bad right now, but I refrained.

“Y/n, how are you still on your first chore?” Spider asks while taking one of the baskets that Kiri took from my stack and settling it on the bottom of another tree.

“Why is everyone commenting on my lack of effort today?” I grumble and toss the fruit I’d just cut and watch it hit the branch he was next to.

“I could have died!” Spider yells like the drama queen he is.

“Thats for wrapping my umbilical cord around my neck-“

“You always bring that shit up, I didn’t even know I was alive Y/n, let it go!” He bickers back.

“Well clearly you knew enough about assassination attempts, it’s a good thing you failed.” I huff and look up in time to see the same fruit I’d thrown at him hit the branch next to me. As it rolled down to the ground below, I could see both of the bruises we caused.

“Stop wasting fruit you two!” Kiri yells.

“Tell your whatever-you-are to knock it off.” I answer back.

“Tell your best friend she’s an idiot.” Spider bites back while moving on to another tree, basket already a third of the way full. Shit, everyone was faster than I was today, I might be coming down with something.

“You know he likes you right?” I ask Kiri waiting for Spider to be out of an earshot.

“Who are you talking about?” Kiri asks while rolling her eyes, but entertaining me with a smile.

“Both actually, but I was talking about Rotxo.” I stated while finally filling my third basket.

“No he doesn’t,” Kiri waves me off but I laugh a little.

“He comes to you every time his nets break, no one else.” I stated.

“That doesn’t mean he likes me-“

“He comes to you, only talks to you, he’s smitten with you,” I conclude and carry my basket over to where they were supposed to be dropped off. She follows me with her full basket and Spider is started to finish up his.

“Why don’t you make him one?” Kiri asks and I blush.

“I’m human, I can’t weave to Metkayina proportions, it would take me forever, and wouldn’t that be considered a courting gift?” I stated.

“Wait, what does you having to be a human have to do with anything?” She asks and I laugh.

“They don’t trust humans, why would they accept a gift from us? I’m surprised they let us handle food most days, but thats probably because someone is always watching us.” I stated.

“They trust you, you have proven yourselves.”

“Sure-“

_________

And here I was, sitting down in our marui, listening to Tuk’s instructions on weaving a net. The material was somewhat harsh on my fingers as I listened to her explain when to pull what and where. I finished off the fourth row and can already tell the squares were too small, meaning there’d be more of them than there should be, meaning I’d use up more of the material.

“What am I doing wrong Tuk?” I asked as I look up at her to see her looking out of the Marui and toward the splashing coming from the water below. I sigh quietly and want to kick myself in the head.

“I’m not sure,” Tuk shrugs and looks back at me.

“Alright, thats it, go on.” I shoo at her with my hands and she giddily stands up, turns around to leave but lets her shoulders fall and turns back around.

“But we need to make a net-“ She begins walking back but I place my hand on her chest stop her and she does.

“I forget to let you be a kid sometimes, I can ask you during another time when you’re actually wanting to make a net. Now go enjoy your free time before tonights party.” I reassure her and she nods, hugging me and lifting me as I stood on tippy toes.

“Thank you Y/n, I’ll be back!” She promises before heading on the walkway and diving off into the water from there. She scares me when she does that most days.

“I thought I heard you here,” Spider says while walking toward me and squatting next to me.

“What do you want?” I asked while untying the net I’d just failed at making.

“The rest of us are going to hang out at the spot if you wanted to come,” he offers and looks at the net I’d started unweaving. “Whats that you’re making?” He asks and I show him whats left of it.

“A failure. But it doesn’t matter, I can’t make it to the correct proportions. Also I can’t hang today, I’m on babysitting duty.”

“Tuk’s in good hands-“

“And Neytiri would skin me alive, Jake would give me a lecture, Kiri would side with her parents, and you’d stay silent.”

“What about Lo’ak?” He asks as if it was unfair I’d let him off the hook.

“Making out with Tsireya,” I let out a laugh and he does too.

“Did you wanna bring Tuk with?” He asks.

“No, she needs time to be with her friends, plus I need some time to think.” I admit.

“You sure?” He asks again and I laugh lightly.

“Go impress Kiri and leave me alone, monkey boy.”

“Fuck off-“ He hides his blush by looking away but I saw his smile. He stands and starts running off. “See you tonight!” He yells as he runs.

I sigh and wrap up the material I was using back into a rolled up ball before sighing, sitting at the opening of the marui with my legs crosses as I looked off at Tuk playing with some girls. Too far into my own thoughts to hear someone come up until I see teal skin. I look over towards the legs and my eyes roam up at familiar tattoo’d thighs, lingering on them before going back up to his face.

“I’m sorry, did you say something Rotxo?” I asked and offered a small smile.

“What are you doing here?” He asks as water drips from his hair and I’d failed to notice he was wet, he was probably in the water just now.

“I have to babysit Tuk until Neytiri or Jake come back, sorry I couldn’t hang out with you guys.” I apologize and he seems confused.

“I’m watching my sisters so I couldn’t hang out either.” He explains and sits next to me. I furrow my brows and hear the high pitched laughter and yelling coming from the water near us. I peer over and notice Tuk playing with his sisters and I feel embarrassed for not having noticed earlier.

“Your mind has been elsewhere all day, are you okay?” He asks and outstretches his hand to feel my forehead and my eyes widen at the gesture, my body getting rigid.

“Sorry-“ He immediately takes his hand away from my head as soon as he notices my facial expression change.

“N-no it’s fine, I just didn’t think you would want to touch me,” I stated and realize how bad it sounded after it came out of my mouth.

“Why would I be afraid to touch you? You are not ill, right?” He asks and I shake my head.

“No!” I want to slap myself for yelling. “I’m not sick, at least I don’t think I am.” I reassured him.

“Then why would I not want to touch you?” He asks again.

“Because I’m tawtute.” I responded honestly and the look that flashed through his eyes was indescribable, but was gone as soon as it came.

“I do not care that you are tawtute.” He smiles.

“You’re a nice friend, Rotxo.” His face falls after my statement and before I can ask him what was wrong, he speaks.

“What were you doing earlier?”

“Oh, before you came up here?” I asked and he nods. “I was asking Tuk to teach me to weave a net, but I was failing, so I untied it.” I explained, holding up the string I’d already untied to show him.

“I can show you,” He offers and the smile is plastered back on his face.

“I thought you couldn’t weave nets, isn’t that why you always go to Kiri when yours breaks?” I asked and his ears immediately flatten against his skull, his tail thumps a couple times, how cute!

“I have been learning to fix the same net, not to make a new one, but I can help you make a new one.” He explains and I nod.

“I don’t want to waste your time since you’re watching your sisters-“

“It’s okay, I can hear them from here. If they need any help they know to call to me and I’ll be there. And they haven’t done that yet.” He flickers his ears and I nod, slowly smiling.

“Show me how you do it.” He asks and I begin by doing everything Tuk has taught me, weaving the material around my fingers and once I pull it all together to tie off the first square, it becomes smaller than it needs to be. I sigh in frustration and show him, he’d taken to look over my shoulder as I did that.

“Oh I see what is- uh- how do I say this nicely.” He stops to think before looking back at my face.

“Just tell me, please.” I beg.

“Your four fingers are getting in the way, and when you get them caught on the string, it tugs the loop, making it smaller. You need to trust yourself and stop using the middle one so much.” He says and I furrow my brows, look at the palm of my hand, then face it toward him.

“I can’t remove them and how do I trust myself?” I asked and he gently places his pointer finger and thumb on the tip of my middle finger, grasping it, and gently tugging it.

“Stop using this one, Y/n.”

“Yes. But how?” I ask.

“Let me show you, may I?” He asks and holds his other hand out to take the string from me. I hand it to him as he unties the square I’d made.

“I can’t see what you’re doing unless I’m looking over your shoulder but you’re pretty tall and-“

“Come.” He states and grabs me by my waist, sitting me on his lap, my own thighs coming to contact with his muscular ones and I bite my lip at being this close in proximity to him. It felt hard to breathe.

“Just look at my fingers.” He states while talking me through the process and I felt myself shift uneasily in his lap but focused either way.

“Now you try,” He hands me the finished square he’d made and I begin to do the same movements I saw him do and struggle to keep my middle finger out of it but when I did, the square matches his and I gasp, bounce giddily, and turn to show him.

“I did it!” I exclaimed happily.

“I knew you could do it.” He smiles gently and I bounce from the happiness and feel his hands on my hips, I fight a blush and turn to look at him with a questioning gaze.

“Stop bouncing so much,” He groans and seems like he’s in pain. My face switches to worry.

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to-“ And thats when I felt why he’d told me to stop. I can’t find any other place to look at except his face and his eyes were closed, as if he were ashamed for what transpired.

“Rotxo,” I place my hand on his cheek and he opens his eyes, but darts them the other way. “It’s okay, this happens with humans too.” I explained with a small smile.

“Do you want me to get off or stay here?” I ask and he glances back up at me, hands still on my hips, I’m unable to move unless he lets go. He doesn’t say anything so I try again.

“Okay, uhm, do you need help to make it go down or-“ His eyes find mine and I’m stuck staring at them. They were always such a beautiful hue like the ocean, but not, at the same time.

“Yes,” It was so low I almost missed him say it at all.

“Okay-“ I state again but his hands have yet to move from my hips and I can almost feel the permanent impression his hands were making on my body. “Do you want me to use my hands, my mouth, my feet?” I asked while thinking of the many different ways to jerk men off there was in porn.

“Feet?” He asks and I nod.

“Is that what you want?” I asked and he shakes his head.

“I can start with my hands,” I show him my palms as best I can with how he’s holding me and he nods sheepishly. He gently lets go of my hips and places his palm on the floor. I turn my body to face him and he looks at me in confusion.

I sit on his lap and face him again and his confusion is evident but very cute. I grab his hands again and place them on my hips.

“I’m going to kiss you, when you feel ready, move my hips over your- yeah.” I explain and he seems to understand, I grab his face in my hands and caress his cheeks, looking intensely into his eyes, then in to capture his lips in my own. I could hear him grunt and his fingers are grasping me tighter.

I moved my lips against his, the blush and heat consuming my face was unmistakable, but I continued moving my lips against his own before swiping my tongue on his bottom lip, he groans and moves my hips over his groin and I moan. With our mouths still connected, he caresses my bottom lip as he grinds me over himself, making me gasp, moving his tongue in. I could feel him searching around my mouth, fighting my tongue for the dominance I gave up easily.

“You feel so warm on me-“ He disconnects our mouths and places his forehead on mine while still grinding me on his penis.

“This feels so good-“ I pant and use my hands to squeeze his forearms to try gain some kind of balance on myself. My legs were spread over his thighs as he moved me and the angle was starting to rub my clit deliciously over his hardened member. He sneaks his nose into the crook of my neck and takes big huffing sniffs, this tickles my neck and causes goosebumps to take over, it also makes me moan loudly.

“Rotxo~” Unbeknownst to be I’d said that right in his ear and he grunts. “L-let me use m-my hands now-“ I panted, struggling to string the sentence along.

“I prefer you like this, saying my name like that. Say it again, Y/n.” He sounds demanding and it’s making me become a puddle.

“Rotxo, I don’t think I can- fuck,”

“You can fuck, you can definitely fuck.” He grunts and slides me off his lap. I whine at the loss but see him undo his loincloth, he manages to shift it off himself and staring back at me is an angry teal colored cock, the tip is a darker teal but I’m assuming it’s started to turn a darker shade due to the thrusting. The head is bulbous and thicker than the shaft but still relatively the same size. Theres no way I’d fit the entirety of that in my mouth but I lick my lips subconsciously at the sight.

My eyes nervously travel toward his and back down at his dick. I’m shocked at how big it is but get on my knee’s in front of him and reach over slowly. I grasp it gently, my entire fist wraps around but my fingers never meet, and I’m shocked, I bite my lip and look back at him to see him already staring at me.

“I-I’m going to move m-my hands now.” I stutter through my sentence and drag my hand up slowly, he’d produced enough precome for my hands to glide on him smoothly. I reach the head and I could feel my fingers separate further.

“Fuckin Hell you’re huge-“ I mutter in English, completely transfixed on the size, I couldn’t believe I was touching his dick.

“Thank you,” He mutters back in Na’Vi and I look back at him in shock.

“You’re welcome-“ I respond back in Na’Vi. I slide my hand back down his length and watch how seems to relax to my touch, but the second my hand is back on the tip I can see his body stiffen.

“Is the head sensitive?” I asked and he nods, I smile at the sight before me and pick up my pace. Making sure I pay extra attention to the head. He’s becoming more vocal and it’s making me wetter than when he was grinding on me. But I had to pay attention to his needs at the moment.

“I need to come-“ He grunts and I can tell he’s fighting the urge to.

“Its okay, Rotxo, you can come.” I mutter but he shakes his head.

“Need more-“ He whines and I somehow understand what he means.

I’d long since been using my two hands to twist around the head of his cock, one on top of the other, but I figured he wanted more, so I leant my head down to lick the tip of his cock, then using my tongue to graze the length before placing as much of the tip as I could in my mouth and when I came to catch my breath, he spurt his come on my chest.

“Thats a lot of come,” I mutter but still use my hands to continue pumping his length as he comes. Once he’s done I let go, his chest is heaving and I swear it’s doing something to me but I can’t indulge in this. I knew I’d caused this problem so I fixed it, I shouldn’t be greedy and expect the same treatment but I couldn’t stop myself from thinking about it.

“Come here,” He motions for me when he’s caught his breath and is sitting up again. He kisses me while placing his hands on my hips again. It wasn’t until I felt the cold air slapping my slick that I realized he’d taken the liberty of untying my loincloth and slid it off my body.

“Sit-“ He tells me as he lifts me up and sets me on his thigh. I could feel the goosebumps take over, but being turned on by his skin on my sensitive thighs that I moaned loudly, fuck I didn’t mean to.

“You’re very warm, Y/n.” He kisses my neck and glides me on his thigh, I’m ashamed to say watching him come made me wetter, but the trail I’d left on his thigh was embarrassing. He coo’s while lifting my chin up to look at him, the blush covering my face was unbelievable, and I knew because of how hot it had gotten.

“Did I make you this wet?” He asks but he doesn’t need an answer, but I nod anyway.

“You’re so cute when you are stunned, but I prefer if you called out my name like you did earlier.” He slides me back and the friction has me biting my lip, his thigh felt so nice rubbing in my clit.

“You know, I always catch you staring at my thighs,” He grumbles in my ear once I’m closer to him.

“Rotxo~” I moan in embarrassment and pleasure.

“Yeah, just like that.” He coo’s, gently sliding me by my hips, making sure to tilt them at an angle to continue rubbing on my sensitive nub.

“Please Rotxo,” I whine and he stops.

“Please what?” He asks teasingly.

“Use your hands,” I find it hard to tell him what I want, but thats exactly what he wanted me to say.

“Do you want to come too?” His breath fans on my neck and his voice is making me feel hotter.

“Yes,” I sounded breathy but he lays me down and switches his position quickly, bending in front of my pussy and he takes a whiff, my cheeks redden.

“You smell so good-“ He groans. He rests his palm on my mound, his fingers touching my lower belly, and his thumb dips down to rub slick over my clit and I sigh happily.

“You’re such a good girl Y/n,” He coo’s and I gasp at his words.

“I knew you liked praise, You’re doing so well on just my thumb alone, aren’t you?” He asks and I nod.

“Are you ready for my fingers?” He asks sweetly.

“Yes, rutxe,” I beg. He slides one in and I sigh happily as he pumps it in, filling me up.

“Look at you enjoying my hands, hmm.” He’s enjoying this as much as I was.

“Do you think you could finish quick?” He asks in a steady voice, but his ears were flickering. “I think the girls are done swimming.” He explains and my eyes widen.

“Don’t worry they’re still on the beach, but they won’t take l long to come here.”

It had taken me until now to realize he hadn’t stopped pumping his finger in me and I whine. He’s changed the angle of his fingers until I let out a low moan and he smiles happily to himself. He slides a second finger in and continues to abuse that spot.

“Rotxo, don’t stop!” I whisper yell at him as he continues to pump his fingers in.

“I don’t plan to, sweet girl, but I need you to come soon.” He smirks above me and I moan a little louder without meaning to.

“You’re taking my fingers well, little one. But I’m going to help you out,” He uses his other hand to rub my clit as he continues to pump his fingers.

“Oh fuck~” I whine, somehow managing to meet the thrusts of his fingers with my hips.

“Thats it sweet girl, come for me, come on my fingers.” He coo’s again and I’m a mess, but I come on his fingers, gripping them like a vice as he coaxes my orgasm out so sweetly. His fingers don’t stop until I’m spent, he brings them out of me and tastes them rather quickly, before fighting to place his loincloth on, I hazily stare at him as he does this and he rushes to put mine on. As soon as he sits me up and his hands come away from my waist is when I hear the footsteps coming on the walkway.

“-and thats how you make the first couple squares.” He states randomly and I look into his hand and see what we made of the net.

“Rotxo is teaching you instead!” Tuk exclaims as her face comes into view and I make an apologetic face.

“Sorry Tuk, he offered and I thought it would be nice to let you swim with your friends instead of bugging you,” I stand and my cum is spreading on my inner thighs

“Come on, I’m sure they have to get ready for tonight too,” Rotxo gathers his sisters and heads out. “We’ll see you guys later,” He smiles sweetly and waves.

“See you guys later!” Tuk happily yells after her friends.

“We’ll need to shower Tuk, lets grab our things.” I stated and she nods and grabs everything. Just as I turn I see Rotxo’s face peering over the entrance. I make a face and he waves me over with his hand, I walk over and he plants a kiss on my mouth.

“Thank you, Tiyawn, I’ll see you later to finish what we started.” He kisses me again and follows behind his sisters once more.

Finish what we started? But we already finished… I thought to myself but shook the thought out of my head and headed out with Tuk.

_________

The party started off with ritualistic singing, dancing, and a speech about what they were celebrating. It was nice to understand their rituals, some of the holidays the Omaticaya had were similar, but this one wasn’t. They’re partying to celebrate the warriors and tulkun that died during the humans attacks.

I sat back and observed everyone else dance and sing. Their songs consisted of mighty warriors who died in battle and thanking Eywa for allowing them to have someone so strong during that time. One song in particular had me in my feelings about the life cycle of the tulkun and becoming spirit brothers or sisters with the Metkayina being some kind of rite of passage for the children of the tulkun. I knew as Ronal sang it and her people join she couldn’t help the tears welling up in her eyes, but she smiled as she sang it, she really loved her.

“Why aren’t you joining the party?” I turn to see none other than Rotxo sit next to me.

“I don’t dance,” I stated simply.

“But you do dance,” He whispers in my ear and my face heats up at his comment.

“Come,” He stands, holding his hand out for me to grab, so I take it. He rushes off toward the wooded area on the island and walks further in.

“Where are we going?” I asked and he finally stops.

“To finish our dance from earlier today,” He teases and places his hands on my hips again, leaning down to capture my lips in his.

“Bit we did finish,” I stated confused.

“Yes, but not how I wanted,” He kisses down my neck and I could feel the tingles of my stomach start making their way down toward my clit.

“H-how did you w-want to f-inish,” I stutter as he sucks on my pulse point.

“Inside you,” He mutters and kneels down but picks me up as he kisses down my chest.

“Rotxo~” I moaned as he takes his time kissing down my chest.

“Yes?” He asks cockily and smirks. He sneaks a hand under my shirt and fondles my breast, making sure to gently roll my nipple between his fingers. I suck in a breath and involuntarily grind my cunt in his growing cock.

“Please, I need you,” I pant at the sensation and can’t bring myself to stop repeating it, his hands shift down to my hips and keeps moving me along him.

“You’re such a good girl Y/n, already so needy for me,” He asks and I moan in response, he thrusts back with his own hips and I let out a high pitched moan.

“Why don’t you use your words for me, hmm?” He’s tilting my chin so I look at him but I could tell my eyes were half lidded and it was hard to think coherently.

“Inside me, inside.” I repeat while focusing on his cock rubbing on my clit through our clothes. The friction of the soft loincloth over my clit was starting to become dull and unsatisfactory, my breath coming out labored.

“Thats all you had to say sweet girl.” Rotxo stops his ministrations and unties my loincloth with a flick of his fingers and unties his own. I’ve never been happier to see his thick cock again.

“I have to use my fingers so this doesn’t hurt, okay?” He asks and I nod my head. “Good girl, now lay down.” He instructs and I do so, making sure to lay on the soft grass underneath me.

“I’m going to worship you with my tongue, be as loud as you want to be, nobody will interrupt us here.” He states before placing his face down between my legs and oh my Eywa I could feel his tongue prodding around before concentrating on my clit and my body had a mind of its own as I felt my legs spreading on their own.

He gently caresses my sensitive thighs and I’m a mess, so much so I barely registered him inserting his finger while eating me out. He sloppily thrusts in as I beg him to insert the second one and he does. He pumps his fingers at the same angle as he did in the marui and I’m a whaling mess. Not forming any words just sounds.

“Yeah I like those sweet sounds you make for me.” Rotxo states while slipping his fingers out. I was close to an orgasm and wanted to look at him angrily but couldn’t contort my face to show him my emotions.

“I know, sweet girl, but I can fuck you dumb with my cock now.” He states and settles himself between my thighs. “The hardest part is starting, but it should feel better after, let me know if it’s too much for you and I’ll stop okay?” He asks and I nod my head. He pinches my thigh and it takes me out of my trance.

“I need you to let me know, princess, yes?” He asks and I nod again.

“Yes, sir.” I responded and he kisses my forehead after I verbally answered him.

He rubs the head of his cock in my slick and over my clit and I gasp at the feeling, its so warm, and huge. I can feel him stretching out my entrance with his cock and I whine at the feeling. It fucking hurts, but I don’t want him to stop, although I’m sure he could tell by the way I squeezed my legs on his sides.

“I know princess, I’m sorry, lemme help a bit.” He gently caresses my clit with his thumb, making sure to stop trying to thrust inward anymore, but refusing to pull out as well. I could feel the tingling return as he started rubbing my clit faster.

“Rotxo, faster, please-“ I pant as he continues rubbing my clit faster and I could feel the stretch commence again. It didn’t hurt as bad but the feeling of my fast approaching orgasm was stunted again.

“You’re so hot inside, makes me wonder how else I can take you,” Rotxo grunts while continuously rubbing my clit. “The hard part is over sweet girl.” He states and slides in a little faster than he had been earlier.

It doesn’t take long to feel his thighs on my ass as he fills me with his cock. And the sting of his head stretching me as he pulls out starts my orgasm timer over again. I was beginning to grow frustrated but knew it was impossible to form any words as long as he was rubbing my clit raw. But it didn’t take long for the pleasure to course through my body one he deliciously dragged his cock in the right way.

“Faster, please,” I begged and my eyes fluttered shut at the pleasure and he started thrusting faster in the same direction.

He was going at an incredibly fast pace, the feeling of his thumb on my clit was long gone as he wrapped his body around mine, not once faltering in his thrusts.

“Fuck! Ahh!” I yell and he’s grumbling praises in my neck, but hearing him talk how he was at this moment was the biggest turn on.

“I can feel you squeezing my cock like the dirty girl you are. So filthy, Yawne.” He groans and thrusts harder into me, making my walls crumble as I scream his name.

“Thats it baby, this pussy is mine.” He grunts.

“I’m gonna come~”

“Such a good girl Y/n,” He continues thrusting at the same pace. I can feel my walls flutter but not yet releasing my orgasm.

“Waiting for me, love?” He asks and I nod.

“Yes sir,” I subconsciously answer.

“Come with me,” He thrusts one more time and thats what tips me over the edge. My eyes had been closed for a long time but the white behind them was euphoric, it woke me up, yet made me drowsy at the same time.

“This’ll hurt a bit, my love, I’m sorry.” Rotxo says and starts to pull out but with the angle he was doing it in, I unexpectedly have my second orgasm, it ripples through my body as he slowly pulls out and I’m left contracting around nothing.

“I guess not,” He chuckles to himself while pushing my hair out of my face and my eyes flutter open, but they feel heavy.

“How was that?” He asks and kisses me gently. Lifting my body carefully to lay it on top of his.

“Incredible.”

“Now do you believe Kiri when she said I didn’t like her?” My face is red as a blush takes over. It doesn't take a genius to remember how well Na’Vi ears work, and although I said that comment within an earshot of Spider I forgot to account Rotxo.

[dialovers-translations]

DIABOLIK LOVERS MORE CHARACTER SONG Vol.7 Seiron Syndrome by Mukami Yuma Mini Drama ”A Sweet Lesson”

Original title: 甘美な教え

Source: Diabolik Lovers CHARACTER SONG Vol. 7 Mini Drama

Audio: Here

Seiyuu: Tatsuhisa Suzuki

Translator’s note: As a teacher who also taught at middle school for one year, I totally sympathize with the MC in having to try and teach someone who clearly does not care about learning at all lol. Although I guess in Yuma’s case, it’s a little more justified since these guys have been alive for a long time and they can perfectly survive without getting their degree so it must be pretty annoying to have to keep up with high school. :p Especially someone like Yuma who clearly wants to work with his hands and not with his brains. 

Yuma bursts into your room. 

“ーー Oi, Sow!! Teach me this school shit! ...If I don’t pass the upcomin’ midterms, Ruki will have my head on the choppin’ block for real.”

He walks up to you.

“Ah, god...What’s the big deal ‘bout gettin’ a couple of bad grades? Vampires don’t even need school for anythin’...! Come on, make some space for me at yer desk!”

*Rustle*

Yuma takes a seat.

“I brought the textbook and my notes with me, but I honestly have no fuckin’ clue what any of this shit means. ...I want ya to help me remember everythin’! Then if I still fail regardless, I can at least put the blame on ya instead...Right?”

“Ah, fuck off...! All ya need to do is do a proper job, right!? Get started already!”

You start teaching him.

*Scribble scribble*

“...I’ve never even heard of a grammar rule like that.” 

You frown.

“I can’t help it...! God, shut up! I just gotta get it inside my head, right!? Argh, damnit!”

*Crunch*

“...Ah? Ya want me to stop chewin’ sugar? Don’t ya know!? The brain needs carbs to remember all this crap!”

*Crunch*

*Flip*

“Ah! T-The doodles on that page areーー It’s nothin’ important!”

You chuckle.

“Hey, don’t laugh! Fuck...”

*Scribble scribble*

“...Why do we need midterms anyway? Damnit, I can’t be bothered with this shit...”

*Thud*

You flinch.

“God...Stop gettin’ scared over every lil’ thing. ...Whatever. I’ll just tell Ruki that it’s yer fault that I failed my exams. See ya!”

Yuma tries to leave but you stop him.

*Rustle*

“...!? Che...Don’t tug onto my clothes...”

You try to reason with him.

“...Hah? Ya can bet yer ass that I’m tellin’ him it’s yer fault! I don’t give a damn ‘bout how ya feel ‘bout it!”

You pout.

“Ahー Fuck! I wanna just go and water my plants already! So what if I’ve been failin’ my tests!? I’m goin’ to school at least so isn’t that the most important thing!?”

You tell him that he could always repeat his year.

“Ya really think I’m gonna stoop to the same level as that fuckin’ Sakamaki NEET and be held back a year!? God...! I just gotta do this shit, right!? ...But I’m only doin’ this one page today! ...’Kay, shoot me some questions. I gotta explain what these words mean, right?”

You pose question one.

“Haah...? I’ve never even heard of that word before...! I bet yer pronunciation just sucks! Read it one more time.

You repeat the word.

“Haha...Hahaha...Nah, got no clue. ...Ahー This isn’t gettin’ anywhere...I think I’ll go tell Ruki that yer a lousy tutor after all. ...Ah...This pisses me off...I’ll have some Sugar-chaーー”

*Cling*

“Ah!? Che...The jar’s empty...”

*Rustle*

“Hey, gimme yer blood. ...My irritation level has reached its peak now that I’ve run out of sugar on top of bein’ forced to study.”

He pins you down.

*Thud*

“I think I might feel a lil’ better if I have a sip of yer blood...Come on, where do ya want me to bite ya? Tell me.”

You protest.

“Haah!? ‘Let me go’!? God...That wasn’t the question...Guess I gotta punish that mouth of yers for spoutin’ bullcrap...”

*Rustle rustle*

“Ugh...”

 Yuma bites you.

*Sluuuurp*

“Nnh...Hah...Does it hurt, huh? Don’t talk back...It’d be a shame if yer blood were to drip down from the side of yer lips and go to waste...Nnh...”

*Sluuuurp*

“It’s kinda sweet...I bet you’ve been snackin’ on my Sugar-chan behind my back, haven’t ya?”

You shake your head.

“Don’t lie. Nnh...”

*Sluuuurp*

*Rustle rustle*

“Hahn...Nnh...Both yer lips and yer blood are kinda sweet for some reason...Anyway, guess I’ll suck from here next...Nnh...”

*Sluuuurp*

“Mm...Mmh...”

*Sluuuurp*

“...Hah. What? You’re tremblin’...Are ya expectin’ more perhaps? Hehe...Ya really are a Sow at heart. I can’t believe you’re gettin’ a kick outta havin’ yer blood sucked...”

*Sluuuurp*

“Hah...No more studyin’, huh? Hehe. Guess we’re partners in crime now.”

*Rustle*

“It’s all yer fault...So ya better don’t think ya can get out of this...Hahn...”

*Sluuuurp*

“I’ll savor ya thoroughly...Mmh...”

*Sluuuurp*

ーー THE END ーー

[moonlight-prose]

BADLANDS | FOUR

a/n: i fucking jinxed it. for some reason i lost inspo for this man, but out of nowhere it came back full force. so i'm churning out what i can before it ducks back into it's hiding spot again. in my head there's three more chapters after this. so we're nearing the end! for this one i'm taking it back and finally revealing what happened that night.

summary: love confessions and whiskey always made for a bad combination. similar to you and rooster.

word count: 10k+

pairing: bradley "rooster" bradshaw x fem!reader (callsign panther)

warnings: EXPLICIT SO MINORS YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED, cussing, a heaping amount of angst, alcohol consumption, fighting, arguing, rough sex, p in v sex, cum eating, a tad bit of humiliation (not really), confessions.

previous chapter | next chapter | masterlist

THE HARD DECK; FIGHTERTOWN

You heard her enter before you saw her. The furious stomp of her boots against the hardwood floor and the clatter of her helmet against the bar echoed in the empty building. Penny had left an hour ago, entrusting you with the keys and a warning to not destroy her bar. A promise you intended to keep by the end of the night.

However it seemed to you that Phoenix had other plans.

If you focused, you bet you would be able to feel the anger radiating off of her. You wouldn’t even be able to blame her. Not with the news of different missions people were going on that had been spreading through the base like wildfire all day. You still couldn’t believe it yourself. Hell, you were half positive that you weren’t actually sitting at this bar the night before you were meant to ship out.

Graduation was a day ago, you were all readying your plans for missions on opposite ends of the world and yet there you were…waiting. You figured she’d come and find you eventually after figuring out your plans. Shit the only reason you were drinking so heavily tonight was to prepare for the inevitable argument that was on the horizon. Just like the sun would in the morning, it began to peek its head out the longer you left her there in silence. Stewing in her anger—in your betrayal.

“What the fuck Panther.”

You winced, the ire in her tone enough to slice through your like a sharp blade. “I guess you heard,” you sighed, downing the last of the whiskey in your glass.

“No shit I heard.” She took the stool beside you, snatching the bottle off the bar and drinking from the top. “How could you do this to me?”

“Phoenix—”

“Shut up for a second would you?” She only spoke like this when you managed to royally piss her off and in a case such as this one, you figured you were better off listening to her than pushing your luck. “I counted on us flying together on the next mission. That's why I agreed to it. You’re why I agreed. You’re one of the only people I trust up there to have my back and all of a sudden you aren’t going to be there.”

Sighing, you felt the familiar twinge in your chest give way to the hot burn of guilt that stewed in your stomach. Making the choice had never been an easy one. In fact, you were fully intent on leaving before anyone could officially find out. Except you were never a coward. No, you were taught to face the consequences of your choices head on, and like a soldier, you did exactly that. You stayed to explain, to let her know that you had to do this—for your own sake.

“I just want to know why,” she said, the anger dissipating slowly.

Finally…you turned to face her, the shine in your eyes evident even in the lowlights of the bar. “I…I don’t know.”

“Bullshit.” She stood up, heading behind the bar and grabbing another bottle, making sure to tuck what cash she had in the empty space. “You know exactly why. So tell me. I want a reason.”

“I—”

She smiled even though it never quite reached her eyes. You knew choosing to go a completely different path would eventually lead you here. This part was inevitable. It always had been. Somehow facing her had become the most terrifying part of making this choice. While the others had said their goodbyes with smiles on their faces and ambition in their eyes, you were halfway to breaking on the inside. Goodbye for you really meant goodbye. 

At least for a long time.

“I’m not cut out for the Navy Phoenix.” You shook your head at the sight of her mouth opening. “We both know I didn’t join by the pure desire to fly like you and the others. I just…there’s always been a hole in me and no matter what I did I couldn’t fill it. Being up there for some reason…it fills that hole. At least somewhat. But I can’t do large missions yet. Not until I realize that this is actually what I want to do for the rest of my life, because once I make that choice it’s final.”

Phoenix fell silent, her eyes watching you with a look that you’d only seen her wear once before. The day you met you beat her in training. Getting to the end of the course faster than she’d ever seen and by the time you go out, she was there waiting to introduce herself. A look of disbelief on her face, but an awestruck glint in her eyes. She’d made it known that if there was anyone better than her it was you. The pilot who flew as if you had nothing else to lose.

The fearless Panther.

“You always did know what you wanted out of life,” she finally said, pouring herself another glass.

“I wouldn’t call me acting like a chicken shit knowing what I want.” She scoffed, downing her glass as if it was a shot of water. “So you’re not mad?”

Before you left tonight for a different part of the country, you needed that clarification. Everything else could go wrong for you, but Phoenix never forgiving you was the one thing you couldn’t bear. Sure, you were her wingman, her ally in the skies, but above all that you were her friend. It was a friendship you couldn’t let go of. One that you’d clutch on to as tightly as humanly possible.

She sighed, raising her head to meet your desperate gaze. “I’m not mad Panther. I just wish you gave me a heads up.”

“I’ll do that next time.”

“What makes you think there will be a next time huh?”

Now it was your turn to smile, the weight of your guilt lifting off your shoulders. “You can’t get rid of me that easily.”

“I can try,” she mumbled, laughing into her glass as you shoved her.

“Bullshit you can try. Whether you like it or not I’m stuck to you like glue Phoenix.” You raised your glass, feeling the warmth of the alcohol set into your veins like a fire not yet coming to full fruition. “Till we crash and burn in?”

She shook her head. “You know everyone would hate hearing us use that phrase.”

“Oh come on.” You nudged her again, knowing that no matter what she’d repeat it back. It was a dark outlook on the reality of being a pilot, but somehow you managed to twist into something lighthearted. A reminder that no matter what happened…you were with her till the end.

Raising her glass, she smiled and for the first time in the night it finally reached her eyes. “Till we crash and burn in.”

The whiskey burned on the way down, probably a sign of you having one too many, but you found comfort in the pain. You smiled at the sight of her wincing, knowing that no matter how tough she really was, she still caved at the sight of whiskey. As much as you wanted to push away the reality of this moment, you couldn’t. Nights like this wouldn’t happen very often for the two of you after today. You wouldn’t be able to simply spend time with your best friend, because she’d be off doing what she always planned to do and you were supposed to go with her.

Yet you knew that the path you were veering towards always had your name on it.

“I’m going to miss you,” you said, leaning your head against the palm of your hand.

Her smile as much as you wanted it to remain happy, turned sad—the realization settling in her mind as well. “I’m going to miss you too,” she whispered, reaching for your hand.

“One more drink?” You wanted her to stay longer, to prolong this goodbye until the sun came up and there was no more time left. She had to be up early to follow the mission parameters and you had to close up the bar for Penny. One final goodbye to the place you’d spent your years in—a place you called home.

“I would, but…”

“Right.”

Another smile crossed your lips as you fought back the tears that stung your eyes. You weren’t emotional by nature, choosing instead to hold everything back from the world around you. But every now and then you couldn’t reign them in. Sometimes the emotions were too much for even you to bear, but you didn’t mind tonight. Not when she was in a similar state. She dragged you in for a hug that would have to last you until you saw her again.

Neither of you knew when that would be. There was no definitive answer. Perhaps that was the worst part of letting her leave on a mission that could very well be life or death. You didn’t know if you’d see her in a few months or in a few years. Or maybe tonight was it for the both of you. Although that was a future you desperately wished would never come true. Nonetheless it still hung over you like a storm cloud, waiting for that one day when rain would be forecasted and grief would spill out from the skies.

“Take care of yourself,” you breathed, clutching her tight until the very last possible second.

“You too Panther,” she replied, her voice thick with emotion.

Pulling away she dropped a small piece of paper in front of you, her name and next location scribbled down just in case you needed to reach her. Legally you weren’t allowed to disclose information like this, but for Phoenix friends always came before legal shit. It worked the same with you. Keeping track of one another kept you sane, kept you from letting the isolation get to you.

You thanked her for this amount of information, watching as she walked towards the door and left without looking back. Once again the place felt hollow—a mere memory of days gone past. Of staying out too late and laughing until it hurt to breathe. You looked around at the emptiness of it all. The rows and rows of pictures that hung on one wall and the lonesome piano in the center of the room. Even though you were here for a reason seeing the instrument so quiet still pained you—his fingers usually bringing it to life.

Sitting on the creaky old piano bench, you saw all those night flash in your mind. All the times he brought the bar to life with just a few notes.

As if he could hear your thoughts, the bar doors swung open, footsteps walking slowly across the wooden floor. You knew the cadence of his walk, the echo of his boots and if you didn’t hate one another you would have smiled. Still you didn’t turn to look at him, choosing instead to focus your attention on the sunset that turned the sky orange outside. A magnificent sight for one last night. Nature was giving you one last farewell until you returned once more, coming back home.

“Did you see Phoenix?” You spoke up, trying to appease some of the tension between you two.

Graduation was awkward. Seeing him in his dress whites, his eyes glowing with a joy you’d only ever seen him have once before. The sight made your heart leap in your chest, the feelings you kept buried suddenly peeking their head out again. Yet unlike every other time where you shoved them back down, you allowed them to fester. To take up space in your chest and remind you who your heart truly belonged to.

So when he asked to meet you here…you didn’t say no this time.

“Yeah,” he coughed. “She wished me luck.”

That made you smile briefly. No matter how many times you and Bradley fought, she always played the peacekeeper—standing by both your sides until the very end. If only she’d known how you felt, maybe you wouldn’t be in this mess in the first place.

Getting up from the bench, you finally turned to look at him, the nerves thrumming consistently beneath your skin. You were terrified of this moment, of when time ran out and you had to come to terms with the truth. But then you looked at him and all that worry, all that grief washed away as you took him in.

He wore his service khakis, his hair mussed from pushing his hands through it and an anxious glint in his eyes. He looked at you like a puppy asking for forgiveness. A man who was tired of war, who simply yearned for peace.

“Hi,” you said, a small smile flashing across your lips.

“Hi.” He exhaled, laughing as he watched you head towards the bar. Your glass, still beside the half empty bottle of whiskey.

He took the stool beside you. “I thought I’d find you here kitten.”

The playful nature he usually donned when around you started to come back, slipping into his stance, his smile. None of it helped you appease the racing of your heart. In fact it only made it worse the longer you sat beside him, able to feel the warmth of his body practically press into yours. He caused your mind to reel just by being near you and you weren’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing yet.

“You told me to come here.” You didn’t want to say it, but he looked almost…bashful. “Why…did you ask me here, Bradshaw?”

He poured himself a glass, allowing the silence to build between the two of you until neither of you could take it anymore. “It’s a long story.”

“I’ve got all night.”

Taking a deep breath, he took a sip before meeting your eyes. “I know we’ve graduated and you and I have done nothing but try and kill each other—”

“That’s an understatement.”

He shook his head. “Well, I’m here calling a truce.”

“Where’s your white flag?” you asked, pushing his buttons as much as you could one last time. Teasing, pushing and pulling until there was nothing left was the nature of your relationship—it’s how you figured tonight would go. 

Until time ran out.

“If you wanted my shirt kitten all you had to do was ask.” He smiled, his eyes taking in every detail, every minute reaction you had to his words. You saw him catch the way you inhaled a bit deeper, how your eyes shifted to catch a glimpse of the white fabric that peeked beneath his uniform.

Clearing your throat, you tore yourself away, once again focusing on the amber liquid that was slowly turning your mind hazy. “What else were you going to say?”

“Right…” You weren’t sure how much more of this waiting you could take—the restlessness of sitting so close yet so far apart now getting to you. “We’ve done nothing but try to kill each other but…”

“But?” Fuck, you hoped what you thought he was going to say next actually came out of his mouth.

Sucking in a breath, he set the glass down on the bartop. “I want to be with you,” he blurted out and time ceased to exist.

His face turned red when he caught you staring at him with your eyes wide. There was no doubt that you wore an expression of utter disbelief on your face. You felt your heart swell as your hands began to shake, but words continued to evade you. What the fuck do you say when the man you’d been fighting with confessed he wanted the opposite? You tried to come up with something—any small word to say—but you were pretty sure your brain stopped working five seconds ago.

Luckily for you, he wasn’t out of words. “I…I care about you kitten. Fuck I don’t know if it’s love or if it’s just some crush, but…I know I want you.”

Your throat felt dry as you tried to swallow, his words sinking into your mind. “You…”

“Yes,” he replied.

“And what if…” You could barely get the fucking words out. “What if this—” You gestured between the both of you, your hands shaking slightly. “—is just an itch that needs to be scratched to get me out of your mind?”

“It’s not.”

You couldn’t stand the way he was watching you with so much calm in his expression; as if he was so sure about what the two of you shared. “How do you know?”

He leaned forward, lips twitching as he heard your breath catch in your throat at his close proximity. “Because you’ve been on my mind since day one, kitten. Believe me when I say nothing could get you out of it. Nothing would make me want you to leave it.”

The temptation to lean in further, to finally press your lips against him and know what it felt like nearly overtook you. If he were anyone else, you would have gone for it, but this was Bradley. The man who you thought hated you with a burning passion, the one who continued to catch you by surprise day in and day out. You’d fought with him so many times that finding a middle ground seemed impossible. By graduation you figured things would never change. He would always be the man you were too afraid to admit your feelings to and he would continue hating you.

A cold chill went down your spine causing you to shudder. That alone was enough to snap you out of whatever spell you were under, giving you time to take a step back and assess what just occurred. So, you got up from the chair—much to his disappointment.

“Panther?” His eyebrows pulled together, eyes filled with worry and you couldn’t discern if it was for you or for the situation. Somehow that made everything that much more maddening.

“You’re joking right?” He froze, one foot planted on the ground and the other still propped up on the stool, his mouth opening to no doubt contradict your question, but you were too far gone to stop. “This has to be some prank you’re playing, because we’ve hated each other for years. I’m not imagining that right?”

“Kitten—”

You stumbled back as he stood fully. “No wait. I…I’m having trouble believing that. You hate me and all of a sudden you don’t anymore? Last time I checked those feelings don’t necessarily go away just like that.”

His expression of worry fell away, a hard look replacing it. “If you don’t feel the same way then you can say that. But don’t give me this bullshit excuse.”

“EXCUSE?” you shouted. “You think I’m giving you an excuse? Oh that’s right I forgot. Bradley Bradshaw can do no wrong. So how dare I think that when he confesses feelings it’s real and not meant to make fun of my own—” You cut yourself off, snapping your jaw shut as the words you were too terrified to say nearly broke free on their own.

But the damage had been done. His eyes widened as what you just said sunk into his mind and before you could scramble back to put even more distance between the two of you, he’d closed whatever still existed. A gasp escaped you as his arm wrapped around your waist, dragging you closer until no space remained, until you had no choice but to look up at him and meet his eyes. They were practically brimming with an emotion you couldn’t place no matter how hard you wracked your brain.

He’d never looked at you like that before.

“What did you say?” he whispered, reaching up to cup your cheek.

“Nothing.”

His lips curled up into a crooked smile. “Bullshit.”

“Fuck you Bradshaw.” It didn’t have the intended effect you hoped it would. Rather than letting you go, his smile only deepened, thumb brushing along the top of your cheek lightly and causing your head to spin. “You don’t get to come in here and act like you’re the only one who felt that way.”

“Kitten—”

“No! You don’t get to confess when I’ve spent years loving you, when I should be the one to confess—”

His hand curled around the back of your neck, yanking you so close and for a brief moment you prepared yourself to slap him away. But then…his lips molded over yours so swiftly the thought fell away. You mind nearly shut off as he pressed himself closer, his tongue sliding along your bottom lip. He was…kissing you. Seconds passed before he started to pull away due to no response from you, the rest of you lagging behind. Except then your brain came back to life.

Leaning into him, you slid a hand up his chest, curling into his hair and pulling him even closer as you woke up from your daze. After so many years of being at each other’s throats, the truth had been finally set free. You just never expected it to result in this. He tasted like whiskey and mint, smelled like the remnants of jet fuel and spice, and felt like home.

That alone tugged so sharply at your heart it nearly hurt. Pulling at his bottom lip, you smiled at the guttural moan that he let out. His fingers dug into your waist, his movements becoming bolder as he stepped forward, forcing you back until you hit the bartop.

“Bradley,” you gasped, pulling away to catch your breath.

He groaned, lips trailing down the side of your neck. “I love when you say my name.”

“I say it all the time,” you giggled, eyes fluttering shut at the feeling of his teeth biting into your skin.

“Not like that.”

Much to your disappointment he pulled away, his lust clouded eyes meeting yours. It was like looking into a damn mirror. Both of you were grasping onto your self-control that seemed to be slipping by the minute. In the end you would lose, but for now whatever remained kept you from doing something stupid like fucking in the middle of Penny’s bar. You wouldn’t have your first time with Bradley take place here.

You’d gone years being apart from each other—you could withstand a few more hours. Only now that the truth was out and you knew how the other felt, a few hours suddenly felt like long excruciating days.

“We have to…” His heady gaze flickered down to your lips, his mouth parting slightly as he heaved in breaths. “We have to talk,” you managed to get out. 

Although you fared no better. You were five seconds away from asking him to take you on top of the bartop, consequences be fucking damned. However, the little annoying part of your conscience reminded you that waiting until you were on a bed would help the situation twenty times more. So, you wrangled what little logic you had left back into your mind and pushed away from him to catch your breath properly.

“I mean…we leave tomorrow.”

“We do.” Glancing at him, you felt your clit practically throb at the sight of darkened eyes watching you like you were his prey. While you had a mental talk with your body about self control and waiting, it seemed he came up with an entirely different outcome on his own.

“Bradley.”

His eyes closed, chest heaving as he took in a deep breath before they opened again and you nearly lost the tight grip you had on your restraint then and there. “If you want to talk kitten I’d refrain from saying my name like that.”

“Oh—” Your brain froze as images flashed through your mind of what you could be doing instead of talking. “I wanted to say…”

Taking a step closer, he grinned at the sight of you trying to form coherent words. “You wanted to say?”

“That…that we need to figure out…um.”

His hand cupped your cheek, thumb running along your bottom lip and pulling at it. “Yeah?”

It hit you suddenly that he was enjoying this. He loved seeing you dumbfounded and unable to speak because of him. Found pleasure in watching his incredibly smart fucking girl go from ripping him a new one to only thinking about one thing. Some part of you loved it too. Which is why when he cooed, brushing his lips across yours, his warm breath washing across your cheek, you crumpled. Dug your hands into his hair and molded yourself against him until you were practically inside of him.

That’s right where you wanted to be. You wanted to dig yourself a small space inside of his heart and remain there until the end of time—stay by his side until it was no longer possible.

His lips caught yours, tongue plunging into your mouth and licking into you. He dragged a moan from you so loud it nearly broke you in two. It was then you realized. The space you wanted in his heart already existed. He’d carved it himself the day you met and he’d been waiting all this time for you to claim it as yours. To finally confirm all his hopes and dreams.

“Not here,” you breathed, keening when he rolled his hips into your stomach, his cock straining against the seam of his pants.

“What?”

Using the very last bit of strength you had, you pulled away, cupping his face and watching his eyes flutter open. “Penny will kill me if I fuck you in her bar.”

That woke him up. “Okay. Yeah,” he breathed. “My place?”

You nodded.

Finally taking a clear breath, you watched him place money under the bottle of whiskey, placing the glasses in the dirty bin beneath the bar and reach for the keys. All the while you tried to focus on following him out of the bar. You still wore your uniform khakis like him, your jacket hanging off the back of the bar stool and he grabbed that too. Warmth spread through your body, your heart thumping erratically in your chest as he took your hand and led you out towards his car.

You couldn’t believe this was actually happening, but the smile he gave you and the way he squeezed your palm in his, shoved away every doubt you had in your mind. This was more real than anything you’d experienced. You just wished it would remain this way.

“Tell me this will last,” you murmured, stopping him before you could fully get to his car—the vehicle so familiar to you yet entirely brand new. “Tell me that…”

He kissed you quickly, barely a brush of his lips against yours but it was still enough to take the breath from your lungs. “I’ve never been this sure before that this will last.”

“But—”

“You think too much kitten.”

Shoving his shoulder you smiled into the second kiss. “Sometimes I worry you don’t think enough Bradshaw.”

“Ouch.” He walked backwards, taking you with him until his back hit the passenger side door of his car. “If I think too much I get distracted, because you’re always on my mind.”

You laughed, seeing the pride flicker in his eyes at the sight of you giving into his warm embrace, of letting yourself go for the first time in a long time. “You’re so cheesy.”

“Only for you,” he mumbled into the kiss, biting sharply on your bottom lip, smirking at the whine that came from the back of your throat.

Thankfully Penny’s bar wouldn’t take the brunt of whatever Bradley had planned for you. Only you weren’t sure how patient you could be. You wondered if he fared any better than you.

The door swung open, his hand held out to help you in with another chaste kiss to your lips and that’s what did it. Flipped your heart in your chest and solidified the feelings you held for him in your body. Without knowing it he’d ingrained himself in your bones, became the person you needed in your life—the man you wanted.

He got into the driver's seat with ease, a breathless smile on his lips, light in his eyes even though the moon was covered by clouds and the lamps outside were too dim. Bradley always lit up every room he entered. That was a known fact. Yet even tonight as he started the car, pulling out of the lot and heading onto the main streets, you saw the glow that practically emanated from his very being. He was beautiful, a work of art. 

Somehow in the chaos around you, he decided that you were the one he wanted.

“You know I’ve driven this road so many times, but never with you in my car.”

Your lips pulled up into a soft grin. “Does it feel different?”

“Not really but also…yes.”

Glancing out the window you saw the pitch black expanse of the ocean, what few stars that peeked their head out glimmering in the sky. “I should have told you how I felt earlier. Maybe then it wouldn’t feel so different.”

His hand found yours, pulling it to his lips. “I like how this feels. I’m not lonely when you’re here.”

“And what about tomorrow?”

The second the words left your mouth you knew you shouldn’t have asked. Why bring up something that would ultimately ruin the moment? But you had to know. Was this only a temporary fix for the both of you? Or was Bradley all in? He knew how you felt, yet the confirmation of his feelings were still up in the air and you wondered if they would ever land safely on the ground. Maybe they were destined to remain in the clouds, forever a mystery to you.

He took in a deep breath, his eyes going back to the dark road ahead. “I’m not going to leave you baby.”

“You won’t have a choice Bradley.”

“No I mean it,” he replied, fixing you in his gaze as the car rolled to a stop. “I’m in this…for good. We’ll have missions and be apart for a while, but leaving you? That’s no longer an option for me.”

Rather than respond, you turned back to the dark road in an attempt to make out something clear ahead. This was the path you and Bradley were destined for. Whenever you thought about a future with him your mind simply procured nothing but this. Darkness on a once clear path—a jumble of confusion and chaos that would only prolong with you being apart from one another. You wanted to accept his words as truth, to willingly follow him blindly on this road, but you knew…it wouldn’t end the way he hoped.

Heartbreak had always riddled the two of you and it seemed that this would be no different.

He started driving again, somehow sure that nothing blocked the pitch black shadows ahead. Perhaps that’s where you differed. He held hope and you…couldn’t. At least not yet.

Silence filled the car as he continued to drive, his hand still clutching yours in a warm embrace. Both of you traversed the road together until it finally broke away to reveal a street filled with light. Trees lined the sidewalk, their roots breaking open the cement, the branches nearly covering the lamps that stood tall next to them. There weren’t that many homes on this street and you knew from hanging out with them that Payback was across the street, Fanboy next door.

They were so small you weren’t even sure that they would be considered houses, but Bradley seemed to consider this home, his posture relaxing even further as he parked the car. You felt the cold night air seep in through the window, the amber scent of his cologne you knew so well filling your nose. If you could you’d permanently sear it in your mind. Just to be able to remember him clearly at a moment’s notice.

“It’s nice,” you said, taking in the sight of the small white home with a porch that had a single potted plant of white lilies on it by the doorstep.

“Those were my mom’s favorite flowers.”

“They’re beautiful.”

He kissed your palm one last time before dropping it to get out of the car, coming around to your door. Even as you waited all of one minute you felt the anticipation grow thick in the air around you—your nerves leaping beneath your skin, heart pounding with each breath. You only felt this way before missions, the adrenaline coursing through your body in order to counteract the fear. Except this time you had no fear.

Even though you fought with him, tried to pretend that hatred ran deeper than love in your case, you knew him. He was the man who watched as you beat him time and time again in the skies, the man who kept you in his sights lest something go wrong. The man who bought his mother’s favorite flowers to keep a piece of her with him at all times.

You took his hand when he offered it and followed him down the small pathway that was lined with pebbles. Was he as nervous as you were? Did he feel like breathing was both easier and harder around you like you did with him? The steps creaked beneath the weight of both of you and you quickly glanced behind you at Payback and Fanboy’s houses.

“Don’t worry,” Bradley said, catching your attention as he slid the key easily into the lock and pushed the door open. “Payback’s heading home tonight to see his wife one last time before mission orders come through and Fanboy met with a girl at the bar earlier tonight.”

“Isn’t that most nights for Garcia?”

He chuckled, pulling you into the house and shutting the door with his foot. “I hear that it’s the same girl from last month.”

“Looks like somebody finally caught his eye for good,” you replied, looping your arms around his neck, seeking out more of his warmth.

“He’s not the only one.”

Once again, the breath caught in your lungs. “Bradley…”

“I mean it baby,” he breathed, dipping his head down until his lips brushed against yours. “I’ve never been happier than when you walked into me on the first day.”

A memory flared bright in your mind like a lamp being turned on again for the first time. The first day at TopGun you didn’t know anyone—still a fresh faced nervous as fuck newbie. But right as you walked into the room you rammed right into a man who ended up giving you your callsign.

“Where are you heading in a rush?”

You fixed him with a stoic look, ready to challenge him if he tried to pick on you. “Not my fault you were walking out as I was walking in.”

He merely smiled and that’s where the trouble started. “You’ve got to be quick like a cat around here. You know, like a panther.”

The name stuck after that; eventually you grew fond of it, preferring to be called that over anything else. The memory still made you smile even after all those years of fighting. There remained a glimmer of hope in his eyes the day you met, excitement to see what the skies had to offer him. A passion that you saw now as he led you through the house.

“That long?” you asked, feeling his hands grip your hips, sending a pleasurable spark down your spine.

“Always kitten. Always.”

You didn’t need to say anything else, because he’d already said it for you. Years passed, fights happened, but the feelings still remained. A familiar part of your life with him that never truly vanished. Pulling him closer you pressed your lips against his, attempting to spill every little word you couldn’t get out into this one kiss. Somehow he understood.

His hands pulled at your uniform shirt and t-shirt, yanking it up and over your head before coming back to your lips. A gasp left you when his warm palms connected with the bare skin of your stomach. You’d been touched before, but with him this felt like more. There was an understanding between you that this was real, this was what you fought against for so long. He stroked up your sides, his moan being swallowed by your kiss; almost as if he was the one being touched. 

The sound alone went straight to your pussy, the slick you knew was there practically dripped down the inside of your thighs. He reached for the belt of your pants, pulling it off with a swift motion, the metal of the buckle clattering loudly to the floor. Neither of you paid it any mind. You panted into his mouth, nails digging into his shoulder. You were aching for him to touch you, to fill you until you were unable to breathe.

Per your silent request, he popped open the button of your pants, dipping his hand in slowly—the drag of his fingers causing your hips to jolt forward. If you were riled up before that was nothing compared to now. You could feel the shake of your legs as the anticipation curled in your stomach. The need for him clouding everything in your mind until it was simply taken up by thoughts of him. You trembled when he dragged his fingers gently along your slit, a wet moan being pressed into the hollow of his throat.

“Please,” you breathed, unable to hear yourself over the rushing echo in your ears.

You were almost positive that your heart would stop the second he went further, the organ beating erratically in your chest—threatening to pop under the stress. He groaned when his fingers sunk into your slick, sliding the wetness up and along your pussy until the rough pad of his index finger bumped against your clit. A choked moan tore from your throat, your eyes squeezing shut as he focused on that one area, intent on dragging out every manner of sounds from you.

“You’re so wet,” he marveled, his mouth parting with panted breaths.

Glancing up, you felt your stomach swoop at the debauched sight of him. A red stain spread along his cheeks, his lips swollen from you biting them. He turned his gaze to your face, watching your eyelashes flutter with each light press against your clit. His eyes were dark, filled to the brim with lust and a heat began to rapidly spread throughout your body, filling your face with warmth.

No man had ever looked at you the way Bradley did. Shit, you weren’t even sure men looked at you before Bradley. With one single look he rendered you incapacitated to the pleasure that shot through your veins. Your hips canted forward, chasing his fingers every time he pulled away—the desperation for your impending orgasm growing by the second.

Yet something told you he had no intention of making you come this way.

“Baby,” you whined, pressing a spit slicked kiss to his lips.

He shivered, his eyes falling shut for a brief second before opening again. The intense look he gave you back at the bar now back.

“Bedroom,” he grunted, yanking his hand out of your pants and snatching your hand to practically drag you behind him.

Clothes were strewn along the hallway floor with each step closer to the bedroom door. He pulled off his shirts, tossing them to the floor before reaching for his belt. A job you happily assisted him with, your hand wrapping around his leaking cock briefly to get back at him for accidentally edging you.

He sagged against the wall, his head falling back with a thump, mouth dropping open at the feel of you stroking him so tenderly. You felt the hard press of his fingers against your bare hip, the sharp bite of his blunt nails digging into your skin. The pain didn’t even register in your mind. Instead you found yourself lost in the sight of him. His chest shone with a faint sheen of sweat, causing him to glow in the dim lights of his house. He dug his teeth into his bottom lip in order to muffle the whimpered moans leaving him.

All in all he looked ethereal. You were struck by his beauty once more, completely thrown off by the fact that this is what you got to see when he finally gave up control. His hips thrusted up into your hand, his need for a tighter grip on his cock slowly tipping him off the cliff of sanity. But you simply remained. Leaning up, you bit down on his bottom lip, pulling it free from the hold of his teeth and licking at it gently as if to soothe the ache left behind.

“Fuck,” he groaned, eyes finally opening to meet yours.

“I like you like this.”

Part of you wished you hadn’t said the words out loud, because it snapped him back into action. Tugging your hand free from his half open pants, he walked you backwards until you were finally inside his medium sized bedroom. If you had the time to look around you would see a bed so neatly made it would make the general cry, a nightstand with a single lamp, and a desk that held two picture frames on it. The light to his lamp flickered on as he practically slapped his hand on the light switch, his lips and attention occupied with kissing a trail down your chest.

“You’re not gonna give me a tour flyboy?” He paused, his head lifting to see the sly smile creeping along your lips. “Since I’m so special.”

You knew you were intentionally being a little shit, but when you saw the corner of his lips twitch you knew he couldn’t get enough.

“On the bed,” he muttered, pushing his pants down. “Now.”

“Last time I checked you weren’t my superior officer.”

“Kitten,” he growled, pushing down his briefs until they joined his pants in a heap on the floor.

Your eyes fell to his cock that stood against his stomach. A whine escaped you at the sight of it still red and leaking, a pearl of precum forming at the tip. You longed to lick it off, to know what he tasted like, what he felt like on your tongue, and you knew he knew it. The grin he wore was still noticeable even though your attention wasn’t solely on his face.

“You still want that tour?” Swallowing thickly you tried to school your expression, but your reaction already gave you away. He moved closer, his hand coming up to cup your chin before moving to lay flat against your throat. “Hm?”

No words came from your mouth. No words even came to your fucking head. All you could focus on was the thought of his cock and how you ached to have him inside of you. The worst part of it all was that he could tell. He saw it clear as day on your face how needy you were for him and he loved it.

“What’s the matter kitten?” He leaned down, his lips dragging along yours. “Don’t tell me you lost all your words before I’ve fucked you.”

Another whimper echoed in the quiet room, your breathing getting heavier the longer he kept you there in his hold. If you were anyone else you would have given up the ruse and resorted to begging. But you weren’t anyone else and that’s why Bradley wanted you. Meeting his heated stare, you smiled, your eyes fixing him with fucked out look that had his adam’s apple bobbing.

“Oh Bradshaw. We both know you aren’t that good.”

A feral noise ripped from his chest, his hands gripping your hips tightly as he pushed you flat against the bed. Despite your feelings for one another, despite the truth finally being set free, there was one thing you and Bradley would never give up on. Winning a fight no matter how small and stupid.

“You can’t stop, can you?” he said, maneuvering your legs until they were spread out, giving him room to lay between them. Even you had to admit that being manhandled by him made you lose it faster than you would have liked.

“Where’s the—ah—the fun in that?”

His hand went back to your throat, teeth biting down on the soft skin of your breasts. Pain sliced through you in a gentle wave, prolonging the pleasure that sparked up your spine. You didn’t want him to stop, your slick practically dripping down onto his sheets.

“Yeah? Fun? Okay kitten. How about you tell me exactly what you’re thinking.”

Your mouth opened, ready to fire back with an array of comments, but Bradley was intent on winning. He always was. His finger delved back in between your thighs, sliding through your slick until they were pressed up against your entrance. One final push and they sunk into your wet heat—a gasp tearing from your throat at the sensation. And he watched as you struggled to breathe let alone get words out.

“Where’s my smart girl?” he asked, taunting you with his smile, his fingers thrusting into you slowly. “C’mon kitten. Use your words.”

All you could get out was a moan, your head falling back into his pillow when his fingers dragged along your walls, his thumb pressing against your clit. Your mind blanked, mouth dropping open the longer he kept going and in the distance you could feel the unfurling sensation you craved once again. It spread rapidly through your body, your hands curling around his biceps to find something to grip onto. You were afraid of floating away and never coming back down.

His lips dragged down your throat, sucking on the skin lightly and scraping his teeth to create the beautiful dichotomy of pain and pleasure you seemed to love. A garbled moan of his name caught his attention, his head raising quickly to see your half open eyes and swollen lips. That seemed to give him the incentive to reduce you to a mess even more.

Groaning, he sped up the thrusts of his fingers, his head ducking down—lips wrapping around your nipple.

“I’m—fuck—Bradley I’m—,” you couldn’t speak, each word more incoherent than the last.

He understood you though. Smiling against your skin, he watched you writhe beneath him. Each gasp from you sounded like music to his ears, a symphony that he would never tire of.

“I’ve got you kitten,” he murmured, kissing up your sternum, his warm breath washing across your skin. “You want to cum?”

You nodded, a broken please falling from your lips. Grinding down on his fingers you felt the breath leave your lungs at the feeling of him pressing even harder on your clit. Sparks shot up your spine, the coil of pleasure winding so tight in you the longer he kept going.

He pressed his lips to yours, his tongue gliding along your bottom lip. “So cum for me.”

The coil snapped, flooding your body with the white-hot debilitating sensation that made your eyes roll back. Crying into his mouth you felt your hips buck into his palm, his thumb still stimulating your clit with small measured strokes. You heard him cuss under his breath, caught the way his eyes were focused solely on your face—memorizing what you looked like. Everything felt like you were underwater, because of how you were drowning in the pleasure, sinking into its warm embrace and begging for more.

“Fuck me,” he breathed, dropping his forehead to yours, kissing you gently while you came back to your senses.

A lazy smile slowly spread across your lips when he pulled back. “I’m trying to Bradshaw.”

He laughed, dropping his face to your shoulder, teeth digging into the skin and sending pleasurable shocks to your clit. “I guess you didn’t cum hard enough if you can still tease me.”

“Teasing you is half the fun baby.”

“Yeah?” His hips grinded into you, eliciting a gasp from you that went straight to his cock that was wedged between your stomach and his.

Before your lips could fully form his first name—the plea following after—he dipped his head down, scraping his teeth along your chin. Dragging your leg up and around his hip, he lined his cock up, sliding it through your slick folds. A moan was pressed to your lips, a shiver wracking his body at the feeling of your cum and his precum mixing together and spreading around his cock. You tugged sharply at his hair, curling your arm around his back, digging your nails into the skin.

“Fuck kitten you’re so wet,” he choked, pressing into your slowly and nearly falling over you when you clenched around him. “So fucking tight.”

“Oh—” Your hips pressed down, nails scraping up his back in an effort to latch onto him.

The stretch of his cock sent a pleasurable burn through you, words dying on your tongue with each small thrust he pressed into you. You ached to have him fill you until nothing remained, until you were connected to him with no space left. The familiar building sensation began again, steadily driving you mad. With a final moan of your name, he pushed into you, his hips meeting yours.

“Shit,” he gasped, digging his fingers into your thigh in order to bring himself back to the ground. 

He remained still, his breaths coming out in pants, but you weren’t as patient. Moaning you grinded into him—your eyes fluttering shut; you’d never felt so full before. His hands shifted to still the movements of your hips, a choked growl you’d never heard him make echoing around you. He looked wrecked. His hair was wild from you running your hands through it, a glazed look in his eyes that you could only categorize as feral.

There were no words exchanged between you, but he could tell what you needed. Without warning he pulled out until only the tip remained, slamming back into you and grinning when you shouted in ecstasy. The pace wasn’t gentle; it took you apart piece by piece, promising to give you the end you ached for.

Sobbing into the sloppy kiss that spread spit down your chin which he leaned over to lick off, you felt the pressure build and build and build. You couldn’t think, could barely get breath into your lungs fast enough before it was punched out each time he thrust back into you. The drag of his cock along your walls was delicious. Sending sparks down your legs as your heels dug into his ass.

His hand dropped down to your clit, fingers rubbing in time with his thrusts. You didn’t have a chance to warn him before your pussy clamped down around his cock, a hoarse cry coming from you.

“Fuck baby.” His eyes screwed shut, head tilting back to stave off the painful ache of his body wanting to give in. You felt his hips stutter, his hands digging into your sides as he fought against cumming right then and there.

The sight of his neck stretched out and on display for you was too enticing to look away. Lifting your head you licked along the prominent vein that stood out on his skin—his eyes snapping back to yours when your teeth followed the trail you just made. That same sound echoed in your ears, the reminder that Bradley was so far gone he could barely remember his own name. Sitting up, he dragged your body forward, your legs spreading even further until he could clearly see your cum leaking out around his cock.

Heat spread up your face when he moved, the echo of your slick spreading along his cock ringing in the room. Normally you would have felt embarrassed, but the sight of his eyes darkening, his mouth dropping open slightly, washed away those feelings instantly.

“You hear that kitten?” He spread your cum on his fingers, bringing them to his mouth—his eyes shutting at the taste of you on his tongue. Bradley had half a mind to pull out and devour you, but there would be time for that later. “That’s cause of me.”

A weak moan was all you could get out.

That was enough for him.

Once more he started with a pace that quickly built up the already familiar pressure in your lower body. You wouldn’t be able to say how he shoved you to the edge so fast with just a few movements. It was like he had possession over your body. Telling it what to do when; each thrust sending you spiraling into the pit of overwhelming pleasure. Gasping, you tried to match his speed, but you couldn’t.

“Bradley!” you cried. Your nails scratched so hard along his back you were positive it would leave marks come morning. But you couldn’t find it in yourself to care.

Not when he gripped your leg and yanked it over his shoulder, thrusting into you so roughly you were shoved up the bed.

“That’s it kitten,” he grunted, his voice barely audible over the slapping of skin against skin and the wet squelch of your pussy. “Come on. Give me one more.”

Shifting the angle of his hips, he struck gold—a sharp keening wail bouncing off the walls of his small home. His head shot up, eyes meeting yours as a blinding smile spread across his lips. He could listen to the sounds you made all fucking day if it meant he was the one inside of you and like a madman seeking his prize, he sped up. His cock pounded into you, hitting your g-spot with so much precision you would have thought he was hitting a target that was assigned to him.

Your toes curled over his shoulders, the pleasure mounting in your body so high that it made your vision blurry, but you forced yourself to watch him. To see the sweat practically drip from his face as his lust clouded eyes bored into yours. He panted with every thrust, baring his teeth and still fighting against his own release, because he wanted to see you fall apart around his cock again. He needed to feel it.

His name was like a prayer on your lips and with a final devastating thrust, you shattered.

Clawing at his back, you felt your legs shake, the pressure snapping in two and drowning you entirely. Your back arched off the bed with the force of your orgasm—a sobbed out scream piercing your ears.

He collapsed over you, his lips pressing roughly against yours as he moaned your name, his body shaking while he finally let go. You felt the warmth of his cum spurt into you and practically spill out around his cock. Your hands still gripped onto any part of him you could reach, because you needed him even closer. Fuck you needed him to press you into the bed with the full weight of his body and seemed to understand you.

Letting go, he dropped fully, a small oof coming from you when the air was pushed out of your lungs. The sound made him smile.

Neither of you moved, fully content in staying wrapped up in one another while you kissed. The taste of you still remained on his tongue, creating a heady thrill up your spine, your pussy clenching around him when he licked deeply into your mouth. He grunted, his hips shifting—the overstimulation too much for either of you. Eventually you’d have to move in order to clean up, but for now you couldn’t.

Giving up this feeling, this small moment of peace was too heartbreaking to bear it just yet.

“Where are you being sent to?” you asked, watching his fingers twine with your own.

For two hours you’d been laying in his arms while you talked about anything and everything. There was so much to catch up on and yet so little you didn’t already know about one another. You learned things over the years here and there. Like how Bradley favored cookies over cake, how he always came to classes attempting to present the best version of himself. How he would duck his head and smile softly whenever someone gave him a compliment.

You knew this man just as he knew you. Yet there was still so much to find out.

“I’ll learn tomorrow,” he murmured, pressing his cheek to your head. Your legs were twinged together, mimicking your fingers and you suddenly realized…you’d never been this comfortable before. “How about you?”

“I don’t know,” you said, knowing it was a lie. He didn’t know about your change of plans yet.

You knew if you told him now the moment you had would shatter like broken glass.

“We’ll find ways to make this work.” He said with so much certainty it twisted your heart, pain spreading through your chest. “I know it.”

“I’d like that,” you breathed, afraid that if you said the words any louder he’d see right through you.

How could you tell him that you were rethinking everything you worked so hard to have? How could you break his dreams of being with you like that? It was selfish of you to do this, to keep him in the dark, but the doubt still clouded your sense of clarity. So you simply remained quiet, allowing him to pull you closer to him, his face pressed into the back of your neck. Until you heard him begin to snore softly, each puff of breath hitting your skin.

You wanted to remember this moment, burn it into your mind, because you weren’t sure if you’d ever get it again. Loving Bradley was like loving the skies. You’d do anything to join him up there, to be enveloped wholly in his warmth, yet you’d never get to stay. He was the clouds you longed to be a part of, the skies that called to you like a siren song.

But eventually, like every other pilot…you’d have to land back on solid ground one way or another.

Turning slowly you watched him sleep, saw the way his eyelids fluttered as he began to dream, and you imagined a future with him. Would you write letters to one another? Call whenever you could? Or would you constantly be in a state of longing for the man who you could never really call yours. Both of you would be gone for who knows how long, barely getting to see one another.

Though you hated the truth, you couldn’t ignore it. What you would share would break both of you in two, creating a rift so large that mending it wouldn’t be possible. Leaning in, you pressed a soft kiss to his lips, savoring in their plush softness before you pulled away. He shifted when you sat up and for a moment you wished he would wake up, just so you could see his eyes one last time.

The wood floors creaked under your bare feet, your clothes strewn through the house, and you gathered all of them—getting dressed quickly. He remained asleep, his head turned towards the pillow you were on, arm stretched across the bed as if reaching for you, the sheets wrapped around his waist. And you ingrained that single image in your mind.

Shutting the door gently, you shivered when the biting cold of the morning air stung your cheeks. You stood there for a moment, watching the skies begin to turn the usual light blue shade as the sun rose, and for a moment you thought about going back inside. You wondered what waking up with him would be like.

The potted plant still remained by your feet, the white petals delicate and frail. You smiled bitterly, thinking that this plant in all its beauty was the embodiment of your relationship to Bradley. Though you both wanted it…it still remained breakable in the end.

Never strong enough to remain in the end.

You sighed, watching your breath form in the air, and stepped off his porch. Heading back to a harsh reality that no longer included Bradley.

Or so you thought…