#emily talkin

[nicklloydnow]

“Josef Stalin oversaw the death of thousands of Georgians. Of the 38,679 named in Stalin’s lists who were to be shot or imprisoned from 1937-1938, 3,485 were from Georgia. That was more than any other Soviet republic, aside from the Russian and Ukrainian republics (both of which had millions more than the tiny Caucasian nation). And that purge was primarily of political personas; we do not know how many others were killed in Georgia throughout his reign. He destroyed both the Georgian intelligentsia and the traditional Georgian peasantry, replacing the former with elites permitted by the government and the latter with industry. He wanted to bring Georgia—the country in which he was born—to heel. And so he did.

And yet, sixty years ago this week, Georgians took to the street to protest Nikita Khrushchev’s policy of moving away from Stalin’s cult of personality—of disentangling the Soviet Union from the man who was synonymous with it. Sixty years ago today, tanks and troops bloodily dispersed the crowd. To this day, nobody knows exactly how many were killed.

Why would a people that had been crushed by a man risk their lives to defend his memory? There are several theories. Some say that Georgians were (and are) proud that Stalin had been one of them. Others argue that the protest was less for Stalin and more against Soviet rule—who, exactly, was Nikita Khrushchev to tell Georgians in whom to believe?

Here is another: Georgians took to the streets in part because a cult of personality is just that. A cult. And cults are not so easy to leave. They protested for the same reason that people across the Soviet Union wept openly and wondered how they would live without their leader on news of his death.

(…)

And it is perhaps also worth remembering that the reverse is true, too: that cults of personality of individuals cannot exist without the support of millions who watch the news uncritically and choose not to think of the people unlike (or, perhaps, like) themselves who are hurt by those in power. That even people who take power do not simply take power. It is always, to some extent, given to them. Or at least left to them.” - Why Georgians Protested for Stalin

“Inspired by historian Simon Sebag Montefiore’s theory of there being “two Stalins” – the “Koba” of his Georgian youth and the larger-than-life Soviet dictator – Japaridze defines a third Stalin, a fluid figure existing in the minds of post-Soviet generations, viewed through the prism of nostalgia. This third iteration of Stalin continues to hinder efforts by those living in the post-Soviet space to reckon with the dictator’s record of repression, in particular his use of terror to advance his policy priorities.

(…)

TJ: Once the Soviet Union collapsed, the legacies continued to live on unaddressed and some continued to take pride in certain aspects that are extremely problematic. …

I think it was very easy for many in the Soviet era to position themselves as victims, because they did not want to deal with the notion of guilt and what their role had been, even as bystanders. And I think we are seeing that in Russia today, where many people continue to be quiet because they say, “I’m going to end up in jail and my family is going to end up in trouble.” I genuinely wonder if 30 years from now, those arguments are going to stand the test of time.

I feel more empathy for those who were silent (during the Soviet Union) because they also did not have the same platforms that exist today. I have struggled to maintain some friendships in Russia with people that I know are wonderful people, and I do understand to a degree why they are silent. But it is very difficult for me to understand when I see their social media feeds. They were partying it up in the weeks and months following the start of the war.

How are those relationships we once had going to survive the war? What about those (Ukrainian) civilians who went to bed at night and never woke up? And meanwhile, we are talking about the hottest restaurant in Moscow. I am not trying to say that I am a better person, but I think there is just a certain level of morality that is completely out of whack. And yes, we can put the blame on the Russian authorities. But this is not just Putin’s war. It is also about many of the Russian people who continue to be silent.

When all is said and done on the battlefield, Ukrainians and Russians will have to coexist, to live with that trauma, for decades to come. It is been over 30 years since the collapse of the Soviet Union, and we still have not even touched the tip of the iceberg in terms of repairing the damage that was done. So, if we do not start addressing the current issues soon, I do not know if we will be able to engage with each other.

The Russians’ trauma is going to pale next to what Ukrainians are going through. Their children will have to deal with what their parents did or did not do. Russia is going to wake up to a very difficult reality one day.

(…)

We will have to re-engage with them probably sooner than many would like to think. If nothing else, because of the sheer size of the country, its natural resources. … I think numbers will eventually speak louder than words. It is difficult to ignore Russia, the Russian authorities know it and have taken advantage of it. But the timeline for Russian isolation turned out to be a lot longer than the Russian authorities thought. And we can wean Western countries off Russian commodities to a certain degree, but at some point, those conversations will need to happen. It will take decades.

(…)

The majority of Georgians are siding with Ukrainians and condemning Russia, because they remember what it was like being invaded by Russia in 2008. But even back then, there was a certain polarization among the people that has persisted. As for the Georgian government, it has been sending very mixed signals. I admire the Ukrainians for having come together. One of the goals of the Putin regime was to break the Ukrainian identity and weaken the nation at its core. I think the Georgian people have been weakened much more than the Ukrainians over the years by disinformation, polarization. Russia can then take advantage of it. We are still in this process of trying to unify as a nation. I was very glad to see how the country came together [to oppose] the Russian [-style] foreign agent law in March. Fortunately, people stood up, young people stood up. I hope that we will be able to learn from our Ukrainian friends.

(…)

I was one of the Georgians that initially said, “We cannot turn the Russians away. They escaped the Putin regime.” I am, by the way, a Georgian that went to Russia in 1993 as a kid with my family during the Civil War in Georgia, and Russians welcomed me. So, yes, on the one hand, I am grateful and I have not forgotten the good and the kindness and the warmth that I got from Russians when I moved there and escaped the war in Georgia. But on the other hand, I think it is the behavior that many Georgians find very problematic. Many Russians act like Georgia is still one of their provinces and Georgians should make them feel at home because at the end of the day, they are kind of still at home. And that is very, very difficult for Georgians to deal with. They do not act as guests. And I think that will change Georgia as a country that was often applauded for being a fantastic host. Hospitality has been one of our national sources of pride. … I think a host nation should be treated as a host, and guests should remember, even if they are there for a long time, that they are guests and not occupiers.” - Q&A with Georgian author Tinatin Japaridze

[spaceshipsandpurpledrank]

Lou Wilson’s Quest to Find Where the White Women At

[patrocles]

I am a mother. I’m just not theirs.

THE ENGLISH - Part Two, The Path of the Dead.

[doctorharrisbonkersphd]

I just wanna give thanks to Brian Murphy for always having queer rep in his campaigns effortlessly. He never makes a big deal and has varied rep, including nonbinary characters who use they/them pronouns with no questions asked or even a big fuss. Murph always gives us such great npcs and i just love how effortlessly inclusive naddpod is

[modgirlyreposts-revamped]

Did I tell y'all about the edit I saw wit' Pomni and Henry's FNaF 6 ending speech- 😀😀

[chompe-diem]

i really think it’s jake’s turn to be a gay ass mfer in the campaign

[denim-mixtapes]

Starting the new Dimension 20 campaign nobody talk to me in the foreseeable future unless you wanna hear me unbelievably thirsty for Lou Wilson or Brennan Lee Mulligan or Emile Axford or Ally Beardsley or-

[mopopshop]

ask for more and u shall receive teehee … jealous!emily has me feeling thinggggsss. can we get some hcs when ppl flirt with the reader, like her teammates or just people at bars?

Jealous Emily X Fem!Reader

i think i cooked on this one but idk 😓

she don’t play abt her girl fr, she doesn’t let any flirting of any type slide

like Hailey’s her bsf but let her get too touchy w you and Em will get so annoyed 

literally glued to you in any party/club setting 

her height is 100% an advantage like let’s say a guy at a party’s getting a little to close for comfort and all she has to do is stand in front of him, towering over the dude, and he’ll back off

she’s jealous and possessive but NEVER in a toxic abusive way

hands all over you, all the time to let people know you’re taken

she does not gaf she’ll kiss tf out of you anywhere anytime any place just to get the point across 

also very pouty about it too, like sometimes she’ll go off and sulk about it 

You’ve just pulled off from the Chic Fil A drive through and Emily’s been pretty quiet the whole drive since. She gives short one worded answers, keeping her eyes on the road.

Finally getting sick of it open your mouth to question her “Okay, what’s your deal”

“Nothing” she shrugs, eyes still glued to what’s ahead of her.

It quickly dawning on you why she’s in such a pissy mood, you start to laugh “Don’t tell me you’re mad cause the worker in the drive through said she liked my hair”

Emily roles her eyes, scoffing.

“You are!” you laugh harder, smacking her arm.

“Fuck off, dude”

“Oh so now i’m dude? Em, cmon I can’t get compliments on my hair now?”

She finally looks at you “Fuck does she needa compliment your hair for? She should be worrying about the stuff happening inside the damn store” 

“Babe, trust me when I say it’s never this deep”

“Whatever”

You role your eyes, knowing how she is. You grab her free hand that had moved from your thigh, picking it up and peppering it with kisses. “I love you, you know”

She rolls her eyes again, giving in and putting her hand back on your leg “I love you too, I guess”

all up in your instagram comments talkin abt sum “that’s my gf” “that’s my future wife” “i’m literally gonna propose to her” “stay off my girl fr” “y’all can’t fw my girl” ALLL that she’ll make ppl know 

i’m doubling down on this, when i say she makes sure people know SHE MAKES SURE

“Absolutely! so nice to meet you to, I’m ___ and this is Emily m-“

“Her girlfriend. I’m her girlfriend. We’re dating, together 2 1/2 strong years. We’re locked in”

The team thinks it’s funny asf to flirt with you to get Emily annoyed 

Makes you wear her clothes, absolutely loves it when you do that

Loves when you wear her jersey to games 

even made t-shirt that says “I’m Emily Engstler’s girlfriend. Kindly fuck off” 

You both wear necklaces with eachothers initials 

Will bring you up hella in post game interviews so people get the hint

“Yeah I have my girl out there cheering for me..” “My girlfriends one of my biggest supporters..” “My girlfriend” “Girlfriend” “Gf” “Bae 4 Life” “Gonna get married soon” 

“You like her so much, you go fuck her see if I care” and all you did was like say thank you to a barista 

Sassy masc to her CORE and it comes out so much when she’s jealous 

“This your friend?”

at the end of the day she knows ur the one for her and vise versa and you love each other and ur gay and happy 🫡

[sunshine-on-marz]

The brightest

Aaron Hotchner x Sunshine!Reader

In which Hotch’s grumpy reputation may be on the line

Dedicated to my pookie bestie boo @st4rgzer

The Aaron Hotchner had smiled 6 times in 2 days. Spencer counted. It also just so happened that you joined the BAU 2 days ago. You’d transferred from a different unit, where you only worked for a few weeks before they suggested you move to the behavioral analyst unit, namely because you kept profiling, very accurately, and completely on accident. Well it wasn’t exactly an accident, but you had no clue you could make reading people a job, it was always just something you did. It was honestly insanely impressive. What might be more impressive is just how much you lit up the bureau from the moment you walked in. Your smile far brighter than the painfully fluorescent lights, and from the moment Hotch greeted you he knew he was in trouble

Something about your everything has him absolutely enthralled. The way you absentmindedly fidgeted with your shirt, your smile, your laugh, the small comments and jokes you make during conversations, all the small favors you do for the team, all of it had him head over heels.

The rest of the team was starting to get weirded out. In this very moment Emily was trying her best to explain to you that no, Hotch isn’t ‘nice’. He’s caring and fatherly but he’s not ‘nice’. “Honestly it’s really really insane that you’re calling him nice and it’s even more insane that you’re not wrong, I’ve literally never seen him be this nice for this long” she explains, Derek walking up behind her “we talkin about Hotch’s crush on the new kid?” He asks, leaning on the back of Emily’s chair before looking up at you “hey sugar” he says, you wave at him through your laughter. “Guys I highly doubt he has a crush on me” you explain “maybe he just likes me.. as a person” you explain. “Y/n he practically has heart eyes when he talks to you” JJ butts in, Spencer lifting his hand with a thumbs up. Just then Rossi walks in “are any of you working?” He asks, Emily answers “we’re working on convincing y/n that Hotch is in love with them”, Rossi just laughs. Which says a lot more then his words ever could. “See?!” Derek shouts, gesturing to Rossi who’s still laughing to himself.

“See what?” Hotch’s voice rang through the bullpen from where he stood at the balcony infront of his office. “Nothing!” Everyone said in unison, other than you, you just sat with a confused, but amused look on your face. “Y/N, my office” Hotch said, Emily and Derek having to cover their mouths to keep from laughing. You, albeit nervously, walk upstairs and to Hotch’s office. “Sir” you say softly as you walk into his office, he follows behind you. “You’re not in trouble” he says, chuckling softly as he watches your shoulders relax. “That’s good- no actually that’s the best thing I’ve heard all day” you say, exasperated and relieved. “I wanted to make sure you were settling in well” he says, you smile “oh yea it’s been great!” you smile “everyone’s been absolutely lovely! You weren’t lying when you said it’s a family here”, he smiles softly “it’s good to know you’re feeling included” he says, he slides you over a peice of paper. “The higher ups want us to start getting written statements from the new hires, to make sure everything’s running smoothly, would you mind filling this out for me?” He asks, you nod, he starts again “well excuse me for a second” he says as he walks out of his office, closing the door behind him and starring at his team who were all standing as close to the wall as possible without being in the window. “Will you all mind your own business?” He says, a sea of small agreement and apologizing spilling from the team as they walk off, only Rossi staying behind. “Yes?” Hotch says, raising an eyebrow as he waits for Rossi’s inevitable, and probably sarcastic, remark. “Let them get through the first week before you ask them out” Rossi says, laughing to himself as he walks away, Hotch just smiles, once again reminded of the downside of working with profilers.

I genuinely didn’t know how to end this sorrrrrrryyyyyyyyyy!!!!

I love you guys so so so much!

Remember to reblog and tell me what you thought of the fic!! Reblogs and feedback make the world keep spinning!!

[lovelyverosika]

You didn’t know but with a twist

Hazbin Hotel! Adam x Fem!Reader

Warning: swearing

A/N: Hey<3 My name is Verosika and I’ll write fanfictions whenever I have the time to :) This is my first time writing one, so it’s based on the song "You didn’t know" to make it easier for me. Just to let you know english isn’t my first language..so be prepared for some grammar mistakes :,D

Y/N POV:

We all sat in the courtroom, waiting for the trail to begin. Next to me was my husband Adam and Lute. I wasn’t supposed to be here but Adam wanted me to hear the "childish" and unrealistic ideas of the princess of hell.

After everyone was here Sera spoke "We're gathered here today to determine whether or not a soul in Hell, can be redeemed into heavenly realm by means of this 'Hazbin hotel', Princess Morningstar?",Sera said wanting Charlie to speak up.

I looked down to Charlie,my head resting on Adam’s shoulder. "Webster's dictionary defines redemption as-" before Charlie could speak Adam interrupts her: "Objection, lame and unoriginal". I sighed at his immature behaviour and gave him a slight bump with my head.

Charlie was flipping through her cards making Adam roll his eyes. "If you have actually evidence, then show it already." He said,glaring at Charlie. "We have two patrons already they’re making incredible progress" Charlie defended and I smiled, "Who?", I asked. "Angel Dust" Charlie spoke. "Oh yeah, the pornstar demon" Adam snickered as he added. "He's totally worth being redeemed".

Suddenly Monika,another demon stood up. "Well then, if you know so much…what do you think it takes to get into heaven?",she spoke. It was quiet until I asked if Adam was okay. He scoffed as he pulled out a golden paper from his pockets and a pen, "Give me a fucking moment, okay?",he then started writing and gave me the paper as I read it out, "Act selfless, don't steal, stick it to the man?", I chuckled looking at him with an raised eyebrow. He shrugged "Uh, yeah? Sure got me here...didn't it?",he said seemingly questioning himself. Sera sighed before saying: "He was the first human soul in heaven."

In the following hours Charlie showed us the improvement of this demon called Angel dust and how he did everything what Adam wrote on his list but nothing happened. Sera only sighed as she wanted to declare the trail as failed and that we will see what brings someone to heaven when the first soul arrives. I sat there with my head hanging. I felt bad for keeping my secret,especially when I looked over to Emily,who held the paper that Adam had written earlier.

Emily: But she was right, Sera. She showed us a soul can improve. He saw the light, Sera. Checked all the boxes that you said would prove a person deserves a second chance. Now we turn our backs, no second glance?

Sera: It's not as simple as you think. Not everything is spelled in ink.

Charlie: It's not fair, Sera!

Vaggie: Careful, Charlie, keep a cool head.

Charlie: No! Don't you care, Sera? That just because someone is dead, it doesn't mean they can't resolve to change their ways turn the page, escape infernal blaze.

Y/N: I'm sure you wish it could be so. But there's a lot that you don't know.

Lute: What are we even talkin' about? Some crack-whore who fucked up already? He blew his shot, like the cocks in his mouth. This discussion is senseless and petty.

Lute & Adam: There's no question to be posed!He's unholy, case closed. Did you forget that Hell is forever?

Adam: A man only lives once, we'll see you in one month. Gotta say, I can't wait to…

Y/N: Adam…

Adam: Come down and exterminate you.

Emily: Wait!

Adam: Shit…

Emily: What are you saying? Let me get this straight…You go down there and kill those poor souls?

Charlie & Y/N: You didn’t know?

Adam: Whoops

Lute: Guess the cat’s out of the bag.

Adam: What’s the big deal?

Emily: Sera, tell me that you didn't know…

Sera: I thought, since I'm older it's my load to shoulder

Emily: No!

Sera: You have to listen, it was such a hard decision. I wanted to save you, the anguish it takes to do what was required.

Emily: To think that I admired you, well I don't need your condescension. I'm not a child to protect! Was talk of virtue just pretension? Was I too naive to expect you to heed the morals you're purveying?

Charlie: That's what the fuck I've been saying!

Emily,Charlie & Monika: If Hell is forever, then Heaven must be a lie! If angels can do whatever, and remain in the sky. The rules are shades of gray, when you don't do as you say. When you make the wretched suffer just to kill them again.

Monika: Don't you act all high and mighty!Adam did you ever think your "sweet" wife might be a liar?

Y/N: Huh? Wait no…please!

Monika: Don’t be such a crybaby! Why hide the fact that you were a demon just like us?

Part 2

[joelalorian]

Fall Into Me - Chapter Eight: We'll Dance in the Street like Nobody's Watching

dbf!Joel x f!reader

Summary: Joel is hanging on by a thread as a single father to a tenacious 10-year-old Sarah. Feeling like he's drowning, like the world is about to spit him out, he needs some help before he breaks in half. At your dad's insistence, you show up in his life and change everything.

Story is inspired by the song Fall Into Me by Forest Blakk. Chapter titles will be lyrics from the song.

Word Count: 3.8k

Chapter Warnings: Explicit, under 18 take a hike. No outbreak AU. Lots of feelings, unprotected p in v, flirting, dads being dads. Two idiots falling in love and finally fucking admitting it. Joel is his own warning. Age gap of about 9 years (Reader 24/25, Joel 33/34). No use of y/n. Reader has a nickname used only by her dad and Joel uses various terms of endearment (darlin', sweetheart, etc.).

This chapter includes the scene that sparked the entire story idea. I've been patiently waiting for it to see the light of day. hope you enjoy!

Thank you so much to everyone who reads this self-indulgent story and extra thanks to those who comment and/or reblog - you all make me feel like a rock star!

Dividers by the wonderful @saradika-graphics

Chapter Seven | Main Masterlist

“So, how was it?” Grilling you for the past twenty minutes, Emily was relentless in her pursuit to find out just how good Joel was in bed, after congratulating you on the new job, of course. “Come on! I need to know!”

“Alright, alright! I had no idea you were such a needy bitch. Is your hubby not dicking you down enough or what?” you laughed before regaling her with tales of Joel’s prowess.

“I fuckin’ knew he’d be big and know how to use it! He just gives off that BDE, ya know what I mean? Just how big are we talkin’, anyway?”

Rolling your eyes, you laughed again. “Well, I didn’t fucking measure it, but it’s a definite handful. Besides, you’ve never even met him, Em! How could you possibly get that vibe?”

“I’ve seen photos and heard stories, that’s more than enough to pick up on that sorta thing,” Emily replied with the confidence of someone who damn well knows what she’s talking about. “I need to know more. Gimme all the details!”

“Yeah, yeah. Speaking of BDE, I gotta finish getting ready. Joel said he had something special planned for tonight to celebrate me getting the teaching job.”

“I bet he does. You’re gonna get another deep dicking from that huge—”

“Bye Em!” you cut her off and hit end call before she could carry on anymore.

Tossing the phone on your bed, you finished putting a light layer of makeup on, putting in a little more effort to look good tonight. Ten minutes later, dressed in a pair of dark, fitted jeans and a dark blue, long-sleeve, vee neck shirt that showed just a touch of cleavage, you wandered out to the living room.

“Alright Dad, I’m off. I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?” Leaning over the back of his recliner, you press a kiss to his balding head.

“Have fun on your date and be careful, Spud. Call me if you need a ride home or anything,” he replied, patting your hand. You turned to leave, grabbing a light jacket from the hook by the door just in case, when your dad’s voice carried from the living room. “It’s funny, Joel told me he has a date tonight, too.”

Freezing for a moment, you squeak, “Oh, yeah?”

“Uh huh. Quite a coincidence me thinks.” He paused again, but you were at a loss for words and grateful that he couldn’t see your expression. “Enjoy your night, kiddo.”

Knowing a dismissal when you heard one, you take off through the door. Your mind raced on the short drive to Joel’s. He knows. Your dad so knows. You start to panic for a moment wondering if he’s upset before the realization hits that he didn’t seem remotely mad about it. More like he got a kick out of the idea and enjoyed teasing you. You and Joel had to fess up very soon, but that was a tomorrow problem. Tonight was meant to be all about you and Joel.

Walking through the front door, you expected to find Joel in the living room or kitchen, but the downstairs was empty. Lugging your overnight bag up the stairs, you thought maybe he’d be in his room or the bathroom still getting ready, but again, no sign of him. Where the hell was he?

Making your way down the stairs, you peeked out the window to make sure you didn’t imagine his truck in the driveway when you parked – it was there, right next to your car. He had to be around here somewhere. The sound of soft music hit your ears suddenly. Following the sound, you slipped out the back door and gasped.

A soft glow spread across the yard from lights strung from tree to tree, a plaid tablecloth covered the patio table on which sat a vase of brightly colored tulips, an open bottle of pinot noir, two stemless wine glasses, and two covered plates. Just beyond the patio, a hammock hung between two large live oaks with another set of string lights dangling above it. As your eyes took it all in, Joel stood off to the side watching you with a warm smile.

“Joel,” you whispered, afraid to disturb the dream-like quality of the moment, his name a drawn-out breath in the air when you finally turned to him. His dark eyes glinted from the string lights as he stepped forward out of the shadows, one hand stretched out towards you. There was no hesitation in reaching for him and you clung to each other for a few minutes before he stepped back to pull out a chair for you.

“Thank you,” you whispered, settling into the seat. When Joel took his place across the table from you, you added, “This is so lovely, Joel.”

A bashful smile graced his lips as he removed the covers from the plates and filled the wine glasses. Your gaze soaked in every little movement he made, in awe of the gorgeous man before you and all he’d done to make this evening special. Holding his glass up, he toasted to you. “Here’s to your new job and the start of a very rewarding career. Congrats darlin’.”

Clinking your glass against his lightly, you beamed at him. He looked so handsome, thick curls pushed back away from his face, tanned skin glowing in the soft lighting. “Thank you, Joel.” Already buzzing from the way he made you feel, you sipped lightly at the wine before digging into the meal before you.

Bursts of flavor hit your palette at the first bite, the chicken cooked to perfection and the sun-dried tomatoes adding just the right tang to the red pesto coating the rigatoni. A soft moan escaped before you caught it, cheeks heating up with the way Joel looked at you with hooded eyes.

“I reckon you like it?” he asked, a teasing lilt to his gravelly voice.

“This may be the most delicious thing I’ve ever tasted, Joel. Did you make this?” You took another bite, savoring the flavors that exploded in your mouth.

“Mmhmm. It’s my mama’s recipe, she made it a lot when we were younger, and it’s always been my favorite. I’m glad you like it.” He watched you enjoy another forkful, obviously proud.

“I don’t just like it, Joel. This is fuckin’ delicious. I didn’t know you could cook like this!”

His cheeks turned pink as he cleared his throat. “I can’t, usually. I practiced a lot with this one.” That melted your heart further.

You ate your fill, making small conversation between bites, until your wine glass was empty, and your belly satisfied. Joel poured you another glass, which you sipped leisurely as he cleared the table and placed the dirty dishes in the dishwasher for later. He wouldn’t let you lift a finger.

“Dance with me?” he said upon his return outside, voice deep and gravelly as he plucked the glass from your hand and placed it on the table.

“I’d love to,” you replied softly, lips tilted upwards in a sweet smile. Holding his left hand out, Joel helped you to your feet and let you off the patio.

A new song began, volume a little louder now, and you stepped closer to him. A warm buzz spread through your veins when Joel pulled you against his broad chest, one arm wrapping around your waist and the other bent to hold your hand over his heart. You could feel the thump of his heartbeat beneath the green flannel he wore as he swayed you slowly around the grassy yard, careful to not stray too close to the pool.

Nothing ever felt as right as being there in Joel’s arms, dancing in the yard like the world beyond the fence didn’t exist. Your feelings for this man were overwhelming, growing deeper each and every day – hell, each and every second was more like it – and that four-letter word bubbled in your throat. You swallowed it down, settling your head against Joel’s shoulder, eyes closed and focused on the moment.

Joel’s chin tilted downward, nudging against the side of your face, his lips near your ear, and his breath sent delightful chills down your spine when he began to sing softly.

“Fall into me and I’ll catch you, darlin’. We’ll dance in the street like nobody’s watching. It’s just you and me and the song on repeat in my head, playing over and over…”

My god, how could you not fall in love with this incredible man?

The intimacy of it all brought tears to your eyes as your fingers threaded through the hair at the back of his head. Stomach alight with the flutter of too many butterflies, the urge to speak from your heart became too much, you could hold back no longer.

“I love you, Joel.”

You loved him.

What did he ever do to deserve something like that?

Heart clenching deep in his chest, Joel guided you to the hammock, music still carrying softly through the air. With amazing finesse, he settled you both on the hanging fabric, bodies snuggled together until you nearly became one.

He ached to say the words back to you, but they kept getting stuck in his throat. Instead, he settled for showing you how he felt, just like he did with dancing and singing in your ear – he could have written that song for how relatable it was to the feelings you brought out in him. Dark eyes stared into yours as his hands moved over your body, pulling you impossibly closer.

I love you, his lips said as they pressed heatedly against yours.

I love you, his tongue said as it licked softly into your mouth to tangle delicously with yours.

I love you, his hands said as they touched you with utter reverence.

I love you, his body said as he pressed it tightly against yours, trying in vain to crawl beneath your skin.

Joel kissed you with singular focus until you were both breathless and overwrought with need.

“Take me to bed, Joel,” you whispered when he finally tore his lips from yours. “I need to feel every bit of you.”

Your angelic voice music to his ears, he scrambled from the hammock, scooping you up in his muscled arms to carry you inside and up to his bedroom. His mind occupied by one thing and one thing only – making love to you until you knew every part of him and he knew every part of you – the string lights and last bit of wine were left forgotten in the yard.

Loving the way you clung to him, Joel swept through the house and up the stairs with an urgency he’d not felt before.

His lips moved to brush down your neck, nipping at the tender skin as he went. Once in his room, he closed the door even though you were the only two there. Joel kissed each new patch of skin bared as he removed your clothes until you were completely naked. Easing you back onto his unmade bed, a low growl rumbled from deep in his chest when your fingers slid along his scalp and tugged on his hair. Fucking lord did he love how you touched him.

“Fuck, I need to taste you, pretty girl.”

He’d never seen anyone or anything more beautiful in his life as your naked body writhed on his bed, eager and yearning for his touch, and Joel knelt to worship at the altar of you.

Starting at your delicate feet, Joel’s fingertips traced every inch of you until he reached the apex of your thighs. Leaning forward, he let the scruff of his facial hair tickle along the flesh of your inner thighs, pressing open-mouth kisses along the soft skin as he went. Grinning as you trembled, he met your wide gaze as he leant forward, tongue exploring your folds.

The first taste of you set his soul on fire. Sweet like honey yet more addicting and thrice as satisfying, Joel licked at your clit, tongue occasionally dipping down into you, slurping greedily at the very essence of you.

He couldn’t have thought of a more delicious dessert.

His movements elicited sensuous moans that shot straight to his cock, his jeans quickly becoming too tight and uncomfortable. Seeking a little relief, his hips began grinding against the mattress as he brought you closer and closer to the edge, fingers soon assisting his tongue in driving you mad. Just when he thought he might blow his load in his jeans, again, you came, crying his name out, the syllables drawing out in a beautiful, lyrical drawl. Working you through it, Joel drank down every bit of your release like a thirsty man in the desert.

“Fuck, darlin’. You taste fuckin’ delicious. I could live here, between your legs, for the rest of my life, surviving on just you.” Joel stood as he spoke, gazing down at your blissed out form on his bed as he tore off his clothes, one large hand palming his cock before he practically dove into bed with you.

“You’re too good at that, Joel Miller,” you said, the words falling lazily from your lips as you recovered from the singularly intense orgasm. Swooping down, Joel kissed you passionately, offering you a taste of yourself lingering on his tongue.

Letting his body continue to do the communicating for him, Joel shifted his hips, grinding gently against you while his mouth devoured yours. Groaning as your nails scratched down his back, he reached a hand down to guide his cock toward its home in your pussy. Dark eyes opened wide, Joel watched your face as he entered you, delighting in the scrunch of your nose and the way your eyes squeezed shut before popping open again at the sensation of him splitting you open.

With long, slow, oh so deep, strokes, Joel made love to you, telegraphing the depth of his feelings in the only way he knew how, until you were writhing in pleasure beneath him. Afterwards, he cleaned the mess between your thighs and held you close until you fell asleep with your head resting on his chest. Only then, did he finally whisper the words he longed to say all night. “I love you, too.”

Joel stayed awake for a while, listening to your gentle snores and the soft sighs you made in your sleep. He loved that you let your guard down with him, that he was the man who got to hold you while you slept. In the darkness of night, Joel made himself a promise that he would not fuck this up before falling into a deep sleep of his own.

His dreams were particularly vivid, the sensation of your mouth around his cock so strong he’d swear it was real. He’d never experienced your mouth around him like that before, though, so it couldn’t be real. Joel let his dream-self enjoy every moment, your lips around his shaft and tongue teasing the throbbing vein along the underside of his cock a divinity he’d never known before. At one point you took him so deep that a loud, guttural moan escaped his lips, hands clenching in your hair.

Eyes popping open, the moan carried on, rumbling from deep within Joel’s chest as he glanced down to find you feasting on his hardened length. It wasn’t a dream after all.

“Fuuuccckkk,” his voice, still rough with sleep, drew out the word as he watched you go down on him. Your mouth a form of heaven he suffered too long without, the cheeky, mischievous look in your eye making the pleasure more intense. You clearly enjoyed the act nearly as much as he did.

It didn’t take long before your wanton rhythm and sinful mouth had him coming down your throat, your name a prayer recited over and over in that gravelly voice. “Jesus fucking Christ, darlin’. Where’d you learn to suck cock like that, hmm? Your mouth is like God damn heaven.”

Joel’s chest heaved as you gulped down every drop of his spend, tongue darting out to lick the last bit from the little slit on his cockhead before sliding over your lips. You visibly swallowed, savoring the taste of him; his eyes glued to your mouth the whole time. His hand came up, caressing your face with the love he couldn’t yet voice shining brightly in his eyes, and his thumb traced along your plump bottom lip.

“My little gummy worm,” he murmured, delirious from coming so hard. “Felt so good wrapped around my fat cock.”

Crawling up his body, you settled your weight atop him and pressed your lips to his, letting him taste a hint of himself on your tongue as licked into his mouth, returning the favor from the night before. The kiss was languid and sloppy, perfect for a lazy morning waking up together.

“You tasted good, all salty and musky,” you said once you broke away, voice raspy from having his dick halfway down your throat.

“You can wake me up like that any time you’d like, darlin’.”

The two of you cuddled for a while, neither of you too eager to start the day knowing you didn’t have anything pressing to do. Those unspoken words bubbled in Joel’s chest the whole time, begging to come to the surface, to be spoken aloud and given credence. Still, he hesitated without quite knowing why. Finally rolling out of bed around 10, you jumped into the shower while Joel threw on some clothes and ran out to grab some breakfast.

He just pulled back into his driveway, a bag with a few bagel breakfast sandwiches in one hand – he got an extra in case you wanted pork roll instead of bacon – a coffee and orange juice clutched in the other, when JB’s truck pulled up in front of his house.

Settled on the couch after your refreshing shower, legs tucked under you while scrolling through your phone, you heard Joel’s truck pull up. Waiting for him to come in with breakfast for you both, you were caught off guard by the deep voices rumbling in the front yard. You sat up, peeking through the blinds to find your dad out front, hands on his hips as he spoke to Joel.

Oh shit.

You couldn’t discern their facial expressions from that angle and moved to the front door, quietly easing the heavy wood open to peek out and eavesdrop. They had to be talking about you, right? There was no hiding or pretending you weren’t here, especially with your car parked in the driveway right next to Joel’s. After your dad’s comments last night, you wondered if he planned this ambush then.

“I knew she’d be here,” you heard your dad say, but you couldn’t read his body language clearly. His hands were on his hips still, but there was a smile on his face. “You sweet on my baby girl, Joel?”

You couldn’t hear Joel’s response, his gravelly voice pitched too low for your ears to catch across the distance, but you could see him smile hesitantly even as his broad shoulders hunched slightly. Whatever it was caused your dad to chuckle and punch Joel playfully.

“I knew it!” your dad exclaimed, the sudden loudness startling you. “I knew you two would hit it off, I just wasn’t sure how long it’d take.”

You caught Joel’s response this time, his surprised voice pitching upwards. “You’re not upset?”

Walking toward the house without invitation, your dad paused. “Why the hell would I be upset? You’re a good man, Joel, and I know you’ll treat her well. And she’ll be good for you, too, I have no doubt. Now, you got enough in that there bag for breakfast for three?”

Your shoulders sagged with relief as you eased the door open. “I thought I heard voices! Hi Dad,” you greeted. “What are you doing here?”

“Hey Spud. I could ask you the same thing, but I knew I’d find you here.” Pulling you in for a hug, he ushered you inside. “I got tired of waiting for you two to come clean and thought I’d put you both on the spot.”

Eyebrows shooting up, you glanced at Joel before meeting your dad’s gaze again. “How did you know?”

Giving you a shrug, he said, “You two weren’t exactly subtle and a father always knows.” Nudging your shoulder, JB turned to Joel. “You’ll find that out soon enough, my friend. I can’t wait for the trouble that Sarah will give you.”

The three of you sat at the small dining table, digging into the breakfast sandwiches, your dad insisting you tell him how long you and Joel had been seeing each other and how it all started. Relieved to finally have the truth out there, you told him the story and JB chuckled.

“That about tracks. That’s right around when I started to notice something different between the two of you. And it sure explains why you hardly gave Annica the time of day on your date.” JB gave Joel grief about that failed date for weeks knowing that there was something – or someone – else drawing the man’s attention. JB had the feeling back then that it was you, his baby girl, his grown-up Spud, who captured the single father’s attention.

“You sure you’re okay with this, Dad? I mean…” your words fell off, not really knowing what to say. You’d be heartbroken if your dad wasn’t okay with a relationship between you and Joel, especially now that you verbally admitted to being in love with him.

“Are you kidding? I’m happy as a pig in shit that the two people I care about most like each other.” Your dad was all smiles, beady eyes sparkling with mischief. “In fact, I was planning on setting the two of you up if you didn’t figure things out for yourselves first. Tommy was in on the plan, too, and was the one who suggested we give it a little time. Little shit never told me it became official, though.”

Sitting back in your seat, you giggled with relief. All that time spent fretting over what your dad might think, feeling guilty for dating his best friend and hiding it from him for so long. It was all for naught. You should have known he’d love the idea of you two together.

“So, when’s the wedding?” JB asked, a shit-eating grin spread across his lips as you and Joel froze, eyes darting to each other in wide-eyed panic. Your dad practically guffawed at his own humor while you two were practically having a panic attack. “I’m just kidding – there’s no rush. Just make sure you treat her right, Joel.”

Recovering from the initial panic – not that he didn’t want to marry you, eventually, just not quite this soon – Joel laughed a little nervously. “Of course, JB. I’ll always treat her right. I, uh… I love her.” His gaze shifted to you, heart showing firmly in those dark chocolate orbs. “I love you, darlin'.”

tbc

Taglist: @mellymbee @untamedheart81 @anoverwhelmingdin @runningmom94 @leilanixx

@pedropascalfan221 @lovelyjess69 @sarahhxx03 @sofiparallel @tammythr

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[scribblesofagoonerr]

— mission: chaos fc

↪ muchly requested second part to the previous chapter. I had so much fun writing the first bit, so why not give you guys a second part?

ps. there'll be more parts to this... its' not over yet!

Lets' go with chaos fc!

Thank you thank you thank you to @alotofpockets for helping me with the different ideas and code names, so much to write the mayhem!

pairings: kim little x reader, kyra cooney cross x reader

summary: just 2 best friends being pests together, and enlisting the help of the young guns to help them out

"Yoo-hoo," You call out as you open the door to Kyra's hotel room and walk in, plonking yourself down on her bed as you end up hearing the tail-end conversation of her phone call with Viv.

Ultimately, you know you should try and stay out of trouble. After all, that's what you promised Leah, and you really should keep your promise.

However, you're a known troublemaker and well, wherever you go, trouble tends to follow.

It's only a matter of time...

"Yikes, Vivi sounds mad with you," You can't help but joke and whistle lowly, moving back to relax on the Australians' girls bed with your arms propped up on the pillows. "How bad was it?" You question, curiously.

"She lectured me for what felt like forever," Kyra huffs in protest and slumps back down onto her bed, "It's bad enough I already had an earful from Steph and Caitlin!" She whines.

You wince a bit as you feel bad for her having to deal with that, "Well, if it makes you feel any better I had to deal with a right telling off from Leah and you know she can be scary as hell sometimes," You mumble, shuddering slightly, "And shes' even threatened to ban me eating sweets for a month if she finds out I've got in any more trouble. Oh and there was talk about a leash as well,"

"Right, so no more pranks then?" Kyra slumps her shoulders down in realisation.

"Well, Kimmys' definitely gonna be keeping a closer on us now," You remark, knowing that your Captain will have a watchful eye on you both.

The older Australian nods in agreement, "Yeah, and Steph and Catilin as well probably," She notes.

"Yeah-- I know!" An idea pops into your head as you bolt up from where you're lounging about on her bed, "We'll come up with code names! That way, we can lay low and cause trouble and none of the girls will have a clue that we're talkin' about them!" You personally think the idea's great and you know full well it'll help in your cause to be choatic still.

"That's geinus!" Kyra exclaims, impressed with your ability to think quickly about it.

"Well, you know, I can be pretty smart at times," You remark, jokely pretending to flick your hair back. "Right, we'll be known as... Eagle 1 and Eagle 2," You declare.

"Eagle?" Kyra furrows her eyebrow, confused by where you'd gotten that idea from.

"Uh huh," You nod in agreement with the older girl. "Kimmy will be Tiny, because well, its' kinda self explanatory," You tell her.

Kyra snickers at you making fun of your Captains' height, "Okay. What about Steph and Caitlin?" She questions.

"Caitlin will be known as Veggie, because of Vegemite and Steph will be known as Floof," You begin to reel of the different names, "Alessia will be known as uh, butterfingers!"

"Because of how clumsy she always is?" Kyra smirks at your imaginative nickname for the blonde striker and you nod in agreement, "Alright, what about Katie?" She wonders.

"Leprechaun, because there little shits like she is-- I mean, we're like that too, but shes' Irish as well so it fits better!" You explain your thought process, shrugging your shoulders, "Emily will be known as Fox, like the animal," You state.

"Simple but effective," Kyra remarks, keeping track of the different code names you're coming up with, "Cloe and Frida?"

You tap your finger against your cheek, "Hm, Laces and Magnum, Cloe's last name is hard to pronounce and Magnums' close to Manuum," You delclare, finding the situation amusing to no end, "Oooh. Teyah will be prodigcy, because you know, that's what Katie keeps referring to her as, and Katherine will be umm, Kool-Aid, like the drink!"

"Kool-Aid?" Kyra smirks in amusement as you just confirm your idea with a stuble nod of your head, "Oh, what about Vic?"

"Pancake," You answer without a single thought, "Cos' shes' Dutch and there's a thing called Dutch pancakes-- Oooh, I really want one of them right now!" You stare into space, thinking about them and all you want is one right now.

"Y/N focus," Kyra snaps her fingers in front of your face, trying to get your attention.

You jolt and shake your head suddenly, "Huh-- What... What're we talkin' about again?" You wonder, getting lost in your thoughts about desert already.

"Code names," Kyra reminds you as she laughs, "We still need to figure out the ones' for the rest of them. "What about Sarah and Jonas?" She adds.

"Sarah will be baguette, because shes' french... and Jonas will be Thanos," You're very adamant about the latter, "Because hes' a villian," You hadn't taken the news of Vivs' depature from the club exactly too well and you low-key would like to fight him at some point.

"Still mad about it, huh?" Kyra winces, remembering your reaction to Viv leaving the club wasn't that great.

"Don't want to talk about it. It still hurts," Alongside Katie being the head of the Vivianne Miedema fan club, you were a close second. You were devestated when she played the game in a Arsenal shirt for the last time.

"Pst, Kyra," You whisper and lean over your seat to not to gently nudge the girl to get her attention without being caught out by Kim or the rest of the 'responsible' older girls.

You're currently on the coach on the way to Marvel stadium ahead of the open training session where the fans would have the opportunity to watch you train ahead of the game against the all stars team.

Ever since the phone conversation with Leah, you had definitely been under closer watch and the threats that the blonde made were still fresh in your head as a reminder, and you'll be damned if you miss out on eating sweet treats, best behaviour or not.

But nobody ever said it was fun to always be good and you definitely weren't.

"Yeah?" The older girl turns her head to look at you.

"I have an idea of who can be the next victim of our prank," You give her a coy smile as you nudge your head slightly, "I say we mess with Laces," You gesture to the older girl whos' happily minding her own business.

Kyra smirks at your decision, "What've you got in mind?" She wonders.

You can't help but grin as you lean over the seat and cover your hand over your mouth to whisper to her, "We can sneak into the locker rom ahead of the rest of them. We'll hide the shin pads," You whisper quietly into her ear.

"Perfect," Kyra grins in agreement with your idea to cause chaos once again.

"What're you pair whispering about?" Kim eyes' the two of you suspiciously, hesistant to have even allowed you to both sit near each other.

"Nothing!" Your both quick to respond, acting completley innocent in the situation at hand.

"Mhm, make sure it stays that way!" Kim is less reluctant to simply let that answer slide so she keeps a more thorough check on you.

When the coach pulls up at the stadium, your quick to try and make a break for it, but your Captain doesn't seem to think the same idea, "Not so fast. I want you where I can keep an eye on you," She states, knowingly.

"Kimmmm, seriously?" You whine in protest, but the tight grip that she has on your upper bicep makes it difficult for you to break free like youn want to do.

"Come on," Kim pulls you in the direction of the press conference that shes' got with Jonas and Steph, forcing you to sit on the side where she can keep an eye on you still, "Stay there, don't move," She warns, patting your head ever so pratronisingly before she heads off to join them on the stage.

You can't say you were too fond of being forced to sit there and listen to the journalists ask questions, especially when Steph was poking fun at you directly for your bad habits of wandering off and getting into trouble. 

"This is boring," You mutter to yourself and slump down in the chair, while you kick your legs back and forth in annoyance at the situation you've found yourself in.

How long would it take for Kim to realise you'd got up and left?

Only one way to find out, you guess.

"Y/N!" Your names' barked loudly, causing you to freeze in your spot before you slowly spin around and try flash her an innocent smile, "Sit down!"

"Aw shucks," You mutter and flop back down in the seat, trying to ignore the stern look that Kims' giving you while laughter breaks out in the room from everyone else.

"Only our Y/N," Steph chimes in, amusedly.

You realise you're stuck now and you need to resort to desperate measures to ensure that the chaos still happens.

"Young Guns, your time has come!" You think to yourself as you pull your phone out of your pocket to enlist the help of the girls in the academy.

Y/N created the group: mission chaos fc 💥💣💀

y/n added kyra, mini viv and & mini katie & 4 others to the chat

y/n changed kyra's name to eagle 2 🦅🦅 y/n changed freya's name to godfather 😎 y/n changed maddie's' name to baddie 😅 y/n changed vivs' name to winger 🪽 y/n changed laila's name to ernie 🤪 y/n changed naomi's name to diver 🤿 y/n changed katie's name spencer 👀 y/n changed your name to eagle 1 🦅

eagle 1 🦅: young guns. i need your help! godfather 😎: uh... what's this? baddie 😅: why is my name baddie? winger 🪽: what's going on, y/n? ernie 🤪: i'm so lost. godfather 😎: heh, i actually kinda like mine... 😊 baddie 😅: speak for yourself 🙄 spencer 👀: why is my name spencer?👀 eagle 1 🦅: FOCUS YOUNG GUNS, I'M DEPENDING ON YOU!🫵🏼 diver 🤿: umm okay, i'm confused. ernie 🤪: yeah, your not the only one...🫠 winger 🪽: should i get one of the girls to come help you? spencer 👀: i think we should eagle 1 🦅: noooooooo! ⛔⛔⛔⛔ DO NOT GET ANY OF THE OLDER GIRLS!🙅🏼‍♀️🙅🏼‍♀️ i've been kidnapped, this is the plan... spencer 👀: if you've been kidnapped then we definitely need to tell someone! eagle 1 🦅: nooooo its' fine i'm stuck with mother kimmy and she won't let me out of her sight for the forseeable! i'm enlisting your help to join in on mission chaos fc, your time has come! diver 🤿: we should be concerned, right? godfather 😎: yeah, yeah... i think so eagle 1 🦅: your mission whether you choose to accept is up to you. the challenge is simple, i need you to go and hide laces shin pads. don't ask questions tho. do you wish to accept your mission? baddie 😅: whos' laces? 😕 eagle 1 🦅: I SAID NO QUESTIONS ooh right yeah, i realise now... uh its' cloe lacasse, baddie 😅: i'm down! diver 🤿: sure, why not spencer 👀: seems a bit risky... i don't know winger 🪽: we'll help you, eagle 1 🫡 eagle 2 🦅🦅 has entered the chat... eagle 2 🦅🦅 : y/n where are you? i can't find you-- have you been taken to the dark side? eagle 1 🦅: code names, eagle 2... i've been kidnapped by mother kimmy, the young guns' are now enlisted to help you out. i've got to go, my captivator is heading this way. good luck, live long and propser! 🫡 baddie 😅 : we won't let you down, eagle 1! eagle 2 🦅🦅: so long, partner... 🥲

© scribblesofagoonerr

[spaceshipsandpurpledrank]

Dimension 20 Time Quangle Trailer

[stone-stars]

Transcript:

Josh (Murph): Hah! I did it! I'm the fuckin main warlord! Moonshine (Emily): Yeah, you did. It was good doin' business with you, too, you know. Josh: Yeah, you know what, I held up my end of the deal, you held up yours, we worked together! 'Cause I kicked this dude's ass! Murph: And you hear him and Rust start going back and forth again-- Rust (Murph): No, I'm gonna kick your ass dude. Josh: I'm gonna kick your fuckin ass dude. Rust: I'm gonna kick your ass! Moonshine: Actually, um… you didn't hold up your end of the deal yet. I just delivered my promise, and now it's time for you to deliver. [A pause.] Josh: The fuck are you talkin about? I said-- Moonshine: I mean, the deal said I get you the soul coins, and I get your army. [Metal riff plays.] Murph: You see Josh… Jake, delighted: (laughing) Oh, shit! OH SHIT! [Caldwell laughs.] Murph: You see Paw Paw-- Jake: Holy shit. Someone took herself out to dinner! [Emily laughs.] Murph: Paw Paw-- Paw Paw (Murph): Reer reer reer! Murph: -- goes up on your shoulder. Crosses his arms. And Josh goes-- Josh: Wait, no, but-- (laughs nervously) I didn't like fucking say-- I didn't mean it like that! Moonshine: May I introduce… my lawyer? [Caldwell laughs.] Paw Paw: Reer! Reer reer reer. Reer reer. Moonshine: Paw Paw, could you present the contract as writ and signed? Paw Paw: Reer! Hardwon (Jake): Rust, this is why it's important to learn how to read.

[vixien11]

BESTIE NEW PROMT JUST DROPPED!!!

Emily gets blackout drunk and writes a 1200 page erotica novel (maybe even longer) that makes her girlfriends (Charlie and vaggie) a mix between turned on and mildly concerned the more they read. The hazbins have a bit of a book club because NO ONE knows what’s in the book not even Emily cause she was completely blacked out. It’s a really good book too, the story beats, the characters, the emotions are all leaving the hotel impressed and gobsmacked.

Hah! Okay I just have to write this. Sorry I took a while to respond!(Totally not going to base the novel after a project I'm working on) Emily: (Wakes up groggily and rubs her face as she lifts her head away from a hard object) Ugh... I need to stop asking Charlie's aunt for beezle juice... (Looks down at the object her face was resting on to find a hardcover book called Weeping Horizons. After a moment of looking at it, she notices it says she wrote the book.) Emily: What? I.. I wrote a whole book..? It looks long. How did I even make it hardcover while drunk!? (She looks the book up and down) Well.. Better tell everyone else about this. Later, the whole crew is circled up around this book, eyeing it confusedly. Emily: Next thing I know, I'm wake up with this book. I don't even know what genre it is... (The Hazbins were looking at the book with awe as the cover had a feathered woman with long, pearly white hair curling around her face. The golden eyes of the women sparked a little bit off blood that was inching down her face.) Emily: But the cover looks like my art style.. Charlie: Alright. We'll just read it then! Can't be that bad. (Opens the book tentatively) An hour later, Angel is the only one immune enough to the contents of the book to read it out loud. Angel: Silk gasp as Phoenix licked the blood on her neck and drew circles on her collar bone... (Eyes widen) Okay.. Dove.. (Points at Emily) How the hell are YOU the one who wrote this..!? (Charlie and Vaggie are both blushing profusely and Emily is burying her face in a pillow) Emily: I DON'T KNOOOOW!! I WAS DRUNK OKAY?! Alastor: (Ears are back in asexual disapproval) Yet you have not one grammar mistake... (Flinches back with a small wendigo screech as he reads ahead.) Angel: Well at least I got the stomach for this. (Clears his throat before continuing to read) Half an hour later, it is Vaggie who is reading while the rest of the Hazbins are bawling their eyes out. Vaggie: (Wipes eye) Orchid knew she had made a grave error.. She knew her girlfriends despised her for every moment she had lied. Lied about her past. A shiver went down her spine as she watched Silk's eyes darken. A whimper escaped her.. (Her voice catches) Husk: (Lip trembles slightly) What the fuck are you doing?! Keep reading, dumbass! Angel: FUCK 'EM, ORCHID! I STAND BY YA!! THOSE BITCHES JUST NEED TA LISTEN TO YA! (Cries into Husk's shoulder) Cherri: Fuck you talkin' about, Angi? She ruined there relationship because she lied! She used to kill off civilians like it was pest control! Angel: (Head shooting up from Husk's shoulder) SHE CHANGED AND YOU KNOW IT!! Charlie + Emily: (Hiccupping and clutching either side of Vaggie for support) Cherri: Angi, I will go to war over this. HER REDEMTION ARC HAS BEEN LAME AS FUCK SO FAR!! Angel: (Dramatic ahh gasp) How FUCKING DARE you!! Vaggie: Is no one going to talk about how fucking tragic Pheonix is!? Like hello? Cursed to never be taken seriously but also is why everyone is still as mentally sound as they are! Charlie: (Wipes face) I am SUCH a Pheonix kinnie... Husk: Keep reading! Vaggie: (Sighs and mentally prepares to continue reading.) Should I keep writing this? :3

[ssa-atlas-alvez]

Save a Horse (16+) Cowboy!Reader

Sort of a part two of this

A/N: I could have sworn I had an ask about saving a horse but I couldn't find it anywhere. If I can find it, I'll let whoever requested it know it's been posted but yeah. Hope this is okay, it's a bit late and I am very tired. Also this wasn't the fic I was going to originally post but I remembered it was basically written lmao. Slightly scared about posting this but we move and groove

Description: The team are all at a bar and cowboy just can't resist JJ ;)

Warnings: Hints towards nsfw, I've put 16+ to be safe but it's nothing drastic

Taglist: @xweirdo101x @xdark-acadamiax @ara-a-bird @heidss @chubbyboyinflannel @pendragon-writes @migwayne @bigolgay @technikerin23 @supercriminalbean @honestlycasualarcade @caffeine-mess @1s3v3n1 @oddmiles @kevyeen @stealing-kneecaps @criminalskies @woodandwaxwings @wizardmon3 @aphroditeslovr @ducks118 @azeal-peal @13thdoctor-run @introvertpan84 @goth-boi-atlas @iliketozoneout @chaosofmanyfandoms @logicalhorror @luvfornick @prmsn-17 @pinxeajin

After just finishing a case, you all decided to celebrate. With a bar and casino right across the road, it felt like fate. None of you were drunk, barely one drink in when JJ reaches for your hat and you're quick to dodge it.

"Ma'am, I feel inclined to let you know if you take a cowboys hat, you have to ride the cowboy," 

JJ raises an eyebrow, "Oh yeah?" She asks. 

"Yes Ma'am, I don't make the rules,"

She looks around, making sure none of the team are paying attention, before she reaches across and plucks the hat from your head, placing it on her head. Your jaw drops. 

"What was that rule again?" Your brain short-circuits because holy fuck that was hot. “You okay there cowboy?”

“I-” The sentence dies in your throat. “Can I marry you?” You whisper.

JJ pulls away as she looks up at you, “Seriously?” 

Shit. Seriously yes or seriously no get the fuck away from me? Unsure, you simply nod. She smiles, grabbing your shirt and pulling you forwards, crashing her lips against yours. “That a yes?”

“Sorry, of course it’s a yes,” She grins. 

“Ma’am I have one more question,” She looks up at you with a smile, “Can we go get married now? I just really wanna follow that first rule,” 

She thinks for a moment before nodding, “Okay, but we do this properly after. I want a white wedding as well.”

“Deal,” You agree immediately, “I’ll get Garcia and Morgan, you get Reid and Prentiss? I’ll get Hotch and Rossi too,” When JJ nods you spring into action, you clock Morgan and Garcia quickly, Hotch and Rossi in a corner, talking like civilised men, not far from the pair. You make your way over to them quickly, fully prepared to shove anyone out of the way. 

“Yeah, y’all need to follow us,” You said, grabbing Morgan’s arm with one hand, Penelope’s with the other. 

“What? Why?”

“No time to explain,” You say, making eye contact with Hotch and Rossi in the corner you call over to them, “Hotch! Rossi! Follow me! No time to explain, less talkin’ more walkin’!”

You lead them from the bar (and dance floor) through the pool table and the gambling, straight to the typical casino chapel. 

“Er, what exactly are we doing here?” Hotch asked, turning to you.

“This reminds me of my third wedding.” Rossi comments.

“JJ n I are gettin’ married,” You stated. Garcia gives a loud squeal, hugging you both. 

“Finally! Go! Go! Go!” She shoos you over the receptionist. 

Reid, always the voice of reason turns to the pair of you: “I thought JJ said you weren’t going to elope?”

“She took my hat,” You said, like that explained everything. 

“What exactly does that mean?”

“If you take a cowboy’s hat you gotta ride the cowboy,” JJ said.

You blush heavily looking at JJ in disbelief that she actually told them, as the team turns to look at you, “Wait, you’re doing this to get laid?” Emily asks.

“Hey, hey, that’s not the only reason. It’s just… another reason,” You said, “I knew I was gonna marry her long before when I told you her name was Darla,”

Twenty minutes of you pacing and Morgan looking like he wanted to murder you, you’re in the ‘chapel’. And you want to hit times two speed on the officiant, feeling like he’s talking two words a minute. 

“Yeah, Imma level with you here,” You say, leaning closer to the officiant, “Imma need you to talk a lil faster,” JJ laughs loudly at the desperation in your tone. 

The officiant gives you a strange look for a split second before its gone. Afterall, it wasn’t his job to judge. Eventually, you made it to the vowels.

“I don’t know if I can think straight enough for vowels,” You say honestly, ignoring Emily and Morgan snort in the background, “I love you so fuckin’ much and I wanna spend the rest of my life with you. I’m keeping this short, I’ll make a better one at the other wedding,”

JJ smiles, rolling her eyes slightly, “I love you too.”

“I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride.”

“Oh thank god,” You mumble, you look at her with a smile, with your hands on her cheeks, you begin to close the gap between your lips - wanting to savour this moment. JJ’s hand snakes up to the back of your head and she closes the small gap between you. 

You wasted no time, turning to the team, “Thank y’all for comin’, but we needta get goin’.”

“Cowboy’s gonna get laid!” Morgan cheers, Penelope, Emily and Spencer quickly join in. The pair of you blush.

You don’t say anything, just lightly take JJ’s hand and the pair of you make your way back to your hotel room - which was conveniently just across the road (man, you loved Vegas). You barely greet the receptionist, the pair of you practically running to the elevator. You unlocked the door, letting JJ in before shutting and locking it behind her. Your shoes and jacket come off first before you turn to her. 

“Now, tell me, cowboy, what was that other rule we have to follow tonight?”

“Man, I love you so much.”

[fade to black ;)]