#embarrass everyone ichigo u fuck

[m3kuroshirt]

House of Assassins

GrimmIchi Weekend Challenge #4

Words Count: 1738

Challenged by @backwardshirt

Warnings: None

Genre/trope: Found Family

Required words: neighbour, killer

Ichigo lives with his found family of assassins, and they're getting some new neighbours.

This will be part of a series :D

“Ichigo!” The voice came to him through the murky shadows of sleep. Ichigo shifted, heavy eyelids fluttering. “Ichigo! WAKE UP!” The scream jolted him fully awake and Ichigo barely had time to dodge whatever was flying toward him. He threw himself to the side and thudded to the floor. A shadow flew over him and his bed and hit the wall with a thunk! A groan came from the other side of the bed. Ichigo rubbed the side he landed on and raised himself up, peering over the bed. There he saw…a Renji, splayed out on the floor, red hair broken loose from its usual ponytail.

“What the hell, Renji? You could have knocked,” Ichigo grumbled. His friend grunted and heaved himself up from the floor, turning to face him.

“I did.” He rubbed his head with a frown. “And then Rukia said the food she made is getting cold. So I decided to use desperate measures.”

Ichigo gave him a deadpan stare. “Knocking didn’t work, so naturally your next step was launching yourself at me?” Renji blinked up at him.

“…yes?”

Ichigo glared at him. Renji shrugged. Ichigo sighed and pushed off from the bed. He turned around and walked to his closet to grab something to wear. As he pulled on his shirt, he glanced over his shoulder. “You gonna give me privacy or…?”

Renji, who had moved himself up to the bed and was laying on it and reading a manga he grabbed off the night table, gave him a cursory glance before returning to his book. “Nope. Your bed is comfy.”

“We have the same kind of mattress. Literally. Bought the same day. What the hell have you done to yours to make it less comfy?!” Ichigo struggled into his tight jeans as he spoke. Renji shrugged.

“Why do you wear such tight pants?” The tone of his voice suggested the question was meant rhetorically and Ichigo glared at him again. Renji smirked.

“Renji! Ichigo! The food is going cold! If you two don’t get down here right now, you’ll miss out!” The words were innocent enough, but the voice that delivered them was laced with barely contained annoyance. The two straightened and exchanged wide eyed glances before rushing to the door and down the stairs.

They were greeted by a stern-faced Rukia, a smiling Orihime munching on pancakes, and a silent Chad putting dishes in the dishwasher. Exchanging greetings with everyone, the two sat down with plates stacked with pancakes and dug in.

“Our new neighbours move in today,” Orihime stated cheerily as she finished the last of her food. She stretched her arms over her head. “So, we have to be on our best behaviour, you know. Kisuke said so.” Ichigo gave a non-committal grunt as he chewed on his food. As if Kisuke knows anything about ‘best behaviour’, he thought.

As if on cue, the door to the basement burst open and Kisuke Urahara struggled up the stairs, carrying a massive box. What was in the box? Ichigo wasn’t sure he wanted to know. He tried to eat faster, but he knew leaving any unfinished food wasn’t an option the way Rukia was watching. With a huff, Kisuke heaved the box and dropped it on the only clear section of the table. “How are my little killer children?” he asked with a grin. Orihime smiled widely.

“Good morning, Kisuke!” she chimed. Chad nodded a greeting before disappearing back upstairs. Ichigo stared at the blond man.

“I thought we were being subtle today?” he questioned. Kisuke waved him off with a smug grin.

“Eh?” Kisuke pretended to peer around with overexaggerated motions. “Why? Are there any new neighbours in here?” Ichigo shot him an annoyed glance but Renji snorted and almost choked on his food, catching the other boy’s attention.

“Renji. If you die laughing at Kisuke making fun of me, I will not be doing CPR to bring you back,” he stated. Renji coughed again, before managing to speak.

“F…Fair,” he gasped out before downing a glass of water. Ichigo turned back to Kisuke.

“Got any jobs today?”

Kisuke shook his head. “Nope. New supplies to test out, though,” he answered brightly as he patted the heavy box. Ichigo stared at the box for a moment, then shared a glance with Rukia, Orihime, and Renji.

“I have cooking lessons with Rukia later!” Orihime declared immediately.

“Going to meet up with Byakuya! We’ll be busy all day,” Renji added.

“I’m practicing hand to hand with Yoruichi today!” Ichigo threw his excuse out hastily. He sent a silent apology to Chad and Uryuu, and from the looks of everyone else’s faces, they were doing the same. Then, as if on a cue, all of them rapidly cleaned up and vacated the kitchen.

When he was finally out of the house, and free of Kisuke, only then did Ichigo allow himself to relax. A gentle autumn breeze tugged his hair and sent a shiver down his spine, so Ichigo turned up the collar of his jacket and shoved his hands in his pocket. He could see the moving truck pulled up to the house next to theirs, and although he was curious, he tried to keep his distance. Unfortunately, Kisuke was too good of friends with Yoruichi for Ichigo to be able to actually lie about practicing with her, so he had accidentally talked himself into a corner and had no choice but to walk past the truck on his way to her place.

That is, until it happened.

As he walked past the truck, a shadow fell over him and a high-pitched voice shouted, “Look out!” Ichigo spun around rapidly and caught the falling object. Which happened to be a man. A man holding a heavy box. Ichigo landed on his ass with an ‘oof!’, a large warm body in his lap, back pressed up against his chest and ear near his mouth.

“Fuck,” was the first thing Ichigo heard, and the voice was low and rough and delicious…No. Bad Ichigo, he thought to himself. At least make sure he’s not hurt, you idiot.

“You ok?” he asked. The man stiffened. Then he scrambled off of Ichigo and turned around, box shoved onto the ground. Ichigo stared up at him, and his breath caught in his throat. The man was tall, with broad shoulders, messy blue hair and piercing blue eyes. A white t-shirt stretched a little too tightly across his chest, and sweat beaded on his forehead, likely from the effort of moving boxes. Ichigo realized he was staring, and the man was staring back at him.

“Grimmy! Are you ok?!” a woman with green hair poked her head out of the truck the man had fallen from. The man glanced at her, and Ichigo realized that must be who she was referring to. The woman’s eyes fell on Ichigo and widened, before she turned back to the blue-haired man. “You shouldn’t get so distracted! Other people will get hurt!” The man’s cheeks reddened.

“’m fine,” he muttered. Then he looked at Ichigo and offered him a hand. “Y’alright?” he asked, clearly embarrassed. Ichigo blinked and took the hand, fighting back a blush.

“Uh, yeah. I’m…I’m good,” he replied. As the man helped him to stand, Ichigo had to virtually beat away the thoughts in his mind. Don’t focus on the biceps…don’t focus on the biceps…he chanted internally. Once he was upright, he swayed a little, the blood rushing anywhere but to his brain. “Sh-shit,” he mumbled as he stumbled a little. Immediately, a strong arm was wrapped around him.

“You sure about that?” a low voice asked. Ichigo closed his eyes. Get it together, Kurosaki, he chastised himself, you’re an assassin. You can’t be going weak in the knees for one hot guy. You see Renji every day. An image of Renji snoring, on his bed, hair tangled and drool pooling on the pillow next to him, rose in his mind and Ichigo found himself able to gain his composure. Ok, maybe Renji isn’t that hot…

“U-uh, yeah,” Ichigo mumbled. He opened his eyes and stepped away from the stranger. He turned around with a reassuring smile to the man and the woman. “Sorry about that.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Not the way you were planning on meeting your new neighbour, I’m sure. Uh, I’m Ichigo. Live next door,” Ichigo introduced himself. The green-haired girl smiled.

“I’m Nelliel! You can call me Nel! It’s nice to meet you, Ichigo! I’m glad Grimmy didn’t crush you into dust!” she answered with an enthusiastic wave.

‘Grimmy’ shot Nel a glare. He turned back to Ichigo. “’M Grimmjow. Not whatever weird nickname she” Grimmjow jerked a thumb toward Nel, “decides to give me for the day.” Grimmjow? More like Grimm-WOW. Ichigo internally cringed at his own lame pun and thanked the universe he didn’t say that out loud. He opened his mouth to make an excuse to leave when a voice behind him called out.

“IIICHIGOOOO~,” Kisuke’s voice rang out from the front door of his home. Ichigo tensed. “I see you’re not at Yoruichi’s and she said –”

Eyes wide, Ichigo spun around, desperate not to be roped into another experiment with deadly weapons and poisonous concoctions. “I’m helping the neighbours move in, Kisuke!” he hollered. He heard a quiet ‘huh?’ behind him and shot a pleading look over his shoulder at Grimmjow and Nel. Grimmjow frowned, confused, but Nel seemed to catch on. She smiled brightly and waved to Kisuke.

“Your son is really kind to offer his help!” she called. Ichigo dared a glance at Kisuke to see if the lie worked and caught sight of Kisuke’s knowing look. Unfortunately, the windows of the house gave a clear view of their neighbour’s front yard…so it looked like Ichigo would be under surveillance. Damn. I won’t be able to get away. He turned and held his arms out for a box, but it wasn’t Nel who handed him one. Instead, Grimmjow grabbed the large, heavy box he dropped earlier and rested half of it in Ichigo’s arms.

“It’s too heavy to carry alone,” was the only justification Ichigo got. He blinked, cheeks turning pink as he realized this would mean he’d have to work with Grimmjow…carrying things…watching the other man carry things…and see more of those lovely biceps…yeah, ok, maybe Ichigo was more on board with this than he thought.

[meowmeowmessi]

What also made me WHEEZE was that the villain (forgot his name lol) said that he would come back when Ichigo was happiest...and when did he come back ? When Rukia visited!!! Renji and Inoue where in the background and said nothing.The ending sucked overall tbh with Ishida and Chad being what they hated and promised not to be,Orihime not following a career like an astronaut or teacher(which she mentioned in the dreaded confession)tbh Ichirukis didnt need the canon we had the whole manga,had honeymoon cover, 1000 blades and red string of fate and shoujo bubbles.They made so much sense!! I do agree that ih gives similar vibes to destiel what with Rukia/Sam taking priority and being soulmates to Dean/Ichigo and Cas/Inoue feeling excluded. What made me mad is that they were so perfect together even Orihime knew that Rukia was special to Ichigo. Tite Kubo KNEW what he wrote im still baffled by his decision to make ih canon instead...

Lmao im sorry im bothering u abt this but GOD!

The villain's name is Yhwach I believe (how does one even pronounce that send halp) and it's fine!!!! GO OFF FAM I'M WITH YOU. And good god you're so right that the ending was a disservice to everyone. I feel so sad when I think about how Ichigo said he wanted to protect a mountain load of people and then he got downgraded to,,,,,,, whatever the heck he got downgraded to in the final chapter. My boy Ishida deserved so much better too ugh. Orihime got Cassified so hard oh my god. Girl had so many dreams but ultimately got reduced to a satellite love interest for Ichigo and he didn't even love her back 💀 She was simping so hard it's embarrassing. And that's exactly why I agree with you that IH and destiew and IR and wincest have a lot of parallels!!!! I'm so glad I'm not the only one to see that 😭 God remember how in Fade To Black everyone forgot about Rukia bc their memories of her got wiped? BUT ICHIGO REMEMBERED HER. JUST LIKE HOW DEAN REMEMBERED SAM IN REGARDING DEAN AAAAAAAAAAAA. You're so right! I don't need IR to be canon bc I have the entire MANGA on my side (and extra materials from the anime to boot) 💅 Like Rukia's entire "That's the kind of man you are in my heart!" speech to Ichigo??? Those 7 lonely months Ichigo spent being utterly miserable without Rukia (heeeey almost like how Dean was miserable when he was with Lisa and without Sam amirite)??? Ichigo gaining bankai for her??? The fucking poems??? THE SHOUJO BUBBLES??? Man I could go on and on and on about how perfect they are for each other. Idk what kind of crack cocaine Kubo was on or what beef he had with Shounen Jump at the time he drew the final chapter, but dude could write romance like no other, man, and yet he fucked up big time. He had something so special and he mucked it up smh. But again, no biggie, bc like you said, even Orihime knows that Rukia is special to Ichigo. She said so herself that Rukia isn't just a "friend", she changed Ichigo's whole world. Girl knew she was a third wheel for life. Just like Cass 😂😂😂

[feelingfredly]

The Fox Guards the Wolf

The Dance of the Honey Bee

Chapter Nineteen

The sun beat down brutally but it barely touched Suì-Fēng’s consciousness.

“Oji-san, it is so nice to see you again.” Yoruichi’s voice carried clearly through the parabolic microphone aimed in her direction, but it was the old man’s voice that Suì-Fēng needed to hear. She’d been trying to get a direct view of Mamushi all morning with no luck.  Hopefully, Yoruichi’s visit would bring the snake out of his hole.

According to the Director, the Yakuza gangs were in turmoil and Urahara was to blame.   He’d been pitting them against each other for months fomenting dissension in the ranks so that he could use the chaos as cover when he attacked Okura Kagetaka. The Onmi felt that Mamushi’s gang was the best of a bad bunch, and Kawasaki wanted to make sure they weren’t too damaged in the crossfire. That would destroy more useful connections between the government and the Yakuza than anyone could afford to lose. That meant a protection detail, and that was where Suì-Fēng came in.   Since the Onmi couldn’t allow there to be any question of loyalty issues, Yoruichi wouldn’t be involved, however the Director believed Suì-Fēng would be acceptable.  She had always been unquestioningly loyal, even when that loyalty endangered her, and she had earned the chance to protect her partner and her partner’s family—even if they were Yakuza and could take care of themselves—when the shit Urahara was stirring inevitably hit the fan.

It would have made her feel proud if she weren’t so sure that somehow she was being led around by the nose.

“I can’t believe I’m saying it, Oji-san, but I miss the noise of the pachinko machines.” Yoruichi sounded strangely sentimental wandering around the empty parlor. “I could hardly hear myself think before.”

Mamushi finally came out from where he’d been tucked away all morning. “That would imply that you stopped and thought, Yoruichi-chan.”  The voice was higher than Suì-Fēng remembered, but age often did that, and it had been years since she’d interacted with the man.  The first, and last, time Yoruichi had brought her new partner to meet the family hadn’t gone terribly well.

It hadn't been her fault.  Mostly.

“With the pachinko parlor closed I can not only hear myself think, but I could probably hear what everyone else is thinking, too.” A tinkling laugh echoed in the earpiece and Suì-Fēng could picture Yoruichi laughing.

One of Mamushi’s men pulled chairs out for them to sit and another brought a tray from the back. “Don’t try to listen to these men,” the old man let out a breath of a laugh as he settled himself, “you might find yourself embarrassed by what you hear, and then I would have to avenge your honor and we would never be able to enjoy this excellent tea.”

Yoruichi hmmm’d in agreement and for a few minutes the only sounds were the domestic noises of pouring and drinking. “I would hate to trouble you like that, Oji-san, although, I doubt that I would be the one embarrassed.”

A harsh bark of laughter. “You may be right, Yoruichi-chan, but you shouldn’t admit it.  Leverage is lost that way.”

Suì-Fēng would have told the old man that Yoruichi knew that better than he did, but she just frowned.  What was her partner playing at?

“I don’t know, Oji-san,” she sounded thoughtful, “it might be worth a little embarrassment to be able to hear what everyone else was thinking.”

“A foolish gamble.  You know what you’re thinking, would you like that shared far and wide on the chance that what you’d hear from one of my helpers?  Or the noodle-shop owner next door?  Or even the owner of the laundry two streets over?  No.  It is better for you to keep your secrets and let them keep their own.  Your friend Urahara understands that, even if your partner doesn’t.”

Suì-Fēng stiffened and adjusted her grip on the microphone. Surely…

“Oh, my Little Bee understands the value of secrets,” Yoruichi moved closer to the window. “Her problem isn’t in the keeping of them, but in the gathering of them.”

Suì-Fēng looked around surreptitiously and felt a bead of sweat trickle down her spine.  If she’d been spotted by the Yakuza, then this whole mission was wasted.

“She should take lessons from the other one.  He spies with the crows and the rats and the worms in the earth.  That one can smell the poison in a wound before the knife penetrates the skin.”  The old man’s voice was heavy with disdain. “He hasn’t the honor of thieves.”

Yoruichi tch’d and there was sudden a faint tapping sound in the background. Morse code?

 C…  o… v… e… r…  y… o… u…r… e…a…r...s...

It took her a second too long to catch on and she barely managed to rip the earphones off in time to hear a high-pitched squeal scream from the speakers at a volume that would have deafened her if she’d still been wearing them.  Damn it, Yoruichi. What do you think you’re doing?

Fuck it all. She’d known Suì-Fēng was listening the whole time, and if the conversation was any indicator, the old man had known, too.  No wonder she hadn’t been able to hear him earlier.  Poisonous snake in his hole.  

Take lessons from what other one?  Urahara?  No, the old man liked Urahara.  He’d never accuse him of having no honor, no matter how wrong he was about that.  Getaboshi had thrown his honor away the first time he’d turned on the Onmi. Maybe he was he talking about Okura?

It was time to get home and transcribe her notes.  She had more questions than answers and only one place to start.

Fucking Urahara and his one-man war.

***

Mamushi was chuckling under his breath and Yoruichi couldn’t help but smile.   The man was as close to a grandfather as she’d ever had, and while their family wasn’t exactly traditional, there were some bonds that were deeper than blood.

“Did your Little Bee get stung, Yoruichi-chan?” A wrinkled hand waved, and two new cups of tea appeared as if by magic.  Sometimes it was good to be the Kumichō's favorite.

“If I know her it was a close call, but she’s quick on the uptake and even quicker to move, so the harm will not be permanent, and I will probably be forgiven with a few sweet words and a trip to the hot springs she favors.”

They sat quietly for a few minutes, the verbal fencing from earlier no longer necessary.

“It is good to have you back, Yoruichi-chan,” her Oji sighed.  He was old and tired, and she wished there was something she could do to help, but she’d left that path long ago. “You bring a sweet breeze to these walls.”

“It is good to see you as well, Oji-san.” She bowed her head to him, and he smiled.  He knew very few ever got that kind of acknowledgement from her, and he was proud enough to revel in it. “I am afraid, though, that my presence is a harbinger of rough weather to come.”

She knew her words weren’t a surprise, but Mamushi’s response surprised her.

“Change is never easy, Yoruichi-chan,” he shook his head, “I only hope that I am strong enough to see the other side of the storm.  The other one, the one that even the Onmi found too devious, is trying to erase the yakuza, but while our face may change, the family is strong.”

Yoruichi looked at him and raised an eyebrow. “You expect a frontal assault on the yakuza?”

Mamushi shook his head no.  “Between Okura and his supporters still hiding within the Onmi it will be a political storm large enough to wash away the families, but it will creep upon us like strangling vines, harmless until their roots have taken deep root and killed everything they touch.  We will change or die.”

The old man made a gesture and the men guarding the exits disappeared leaving the two of them alone.

“I truly believe what I said about secrets.  It is better for us to keep our own than to have everyone’s known. With that in mind,” he tilted his head to one side, his bird bright eyes fixed on her, “sometimes secrets are too dangerous to keep.”

He slid a battered penguin USB drive across the table to her and she pocketed it.

“Your friend has proven his loyalty to you once again, Yoruichi-chan,” the dark eyes sparkled a little and once again Yoruichi was happy she’d introduced Kisuke to him so long ago, “please return this to him with my thanks and tell him I hope that it will be useful to him. It is a shame that he wasn’t interested in the family business.  He would have made a fine addition to it.”

It was an old fight that had matured into good-natured teasing over the years, the idea of her marrying Kisuke now too absurd for Mamushi to even playfully suggest, even without considering the difficulty of convincing the blond to work for the Yakuza directly.

“He is more useful on the outside and you know it, Oji-san.” Yoruichi rapped her knuckles on the table loudly and the guards silently reappeared with fresh tea and a tray of tiny matcha-flavored cakes. “You’d have had him murdered in his sleep the first time he questioned your intelligence or defied an order in front of your kobun.  Kisuke hasn’t earned the Director’s hatred by being a good foot-soldier you know.”

Mamushi shrugged one shoulder with an almost careless, yes probably, air.  “Your Director doesn’t know how to manage him.”

Yoruichi couldn’t stop the laughter that burst tinkling from her.  “And you do, Oji-san?”

The old man smiled behind the edge of his cup.  “No, Yoruichi-chan.”  He sipped delicately. “But you do.”

She raised her cup in a salute of graceful defeat.  He wasn’t wrong.

Now, if she could just figure out if this Kurosaki Ichigo had learned how to as well.

***

Kisuke watched the action unfold from his rooftop perch with a half-frown.   Yoruichi had attended her uncle as he’d known she would, and just as predictably, Suì-Fēng had followed, waving her little spy gadgets as if they made her invisible.  Director Kawasaki would be furious with her, caught by no fewer than three yakuza watchmen, Yoruichi, and Kisuke himself.

She was good, but she wasn’t as good as she thought, and if she was the best the Director was going to send after him, the man had gotten criminally complacent.  Perhaps he didn’t really see the threat. He’d never seen Kisuke cornered before.  Never seen him pushed by the threat of losing people he cared about.

Yoruichi was right—there was a storm coming.  It was named Getaboshi.

[sorisanam]

In Which If You Think Ch.589, The “Boob-Window” Dress, and Ichigo & Orihime Having “A Sexual Awakening” is Positive, You’re Trash.

First - and most importantly - if you coin what is nothing more than a moment of breached consent, a sexual awakening, a mutually-enforced realization of physical attraction, or if your descriptions fall into similar pretenses of positivity: fuck you. 

Secondly, if you, in shallow attempts to defend Orihime, diminish her intelligence with cry’s of “she’s been manipulated!”, rob her the awareness of her sexuality because she’s “supposed” to be pure with her intentions only innocent and her desire amorous-free, brush over where she’s robbed agency over her own body, excuse her of personal responsibility, and sanitize her mistakes by delegating all the blame to Kisuke: get bent. 

Orihime is book smart and situationally perceptive. Evidenced by her high-class rank (#3), her brain power being compared to that of Uryu’s, her understanding of the significance of dismantling the Hōgyoku, her realizing the tension that the visored and the full-bringers brought (at different points in time), etc.

Orihime also isn’t ignorant to promiscuous topics or sexually-charged comments about her body.

Tatsuki regularly calls her a “big-breasted beauty”, tells her to use her breasts for a seductive-edge (to which, ironically enough, Orihime quickly defends herself by saying “How rude. I’m not stupid.” when called such for not capitalizing on a chance to make sexual advances on Ichigo), shouts ‘your underwear is showing!’ in public, tells her if she ‘flaunts her stuff’ (i.e. breasts and legs) the men she’s trying to ensnare will be ‘the aggressive ones’ (in their sexual initiative), and teases Orihime’s romantic inclinations for Ichigo constantly. Orihime is never uncomfortable.  (X) (X) (X)

Uryu, out of respect to Orihime, her awareness, and her personal body-ownership, tells her to be conscious as she’s about to strip in front of him.  As in “maybe you’re okay with it, but being a good man, I need to make sure.” Orihime is never uncomfortable. (Certain fans like to, in insecurity-driven, willful misunderstanding, pretend Uryu was a literal woman, but instances where Ichigo is (A) a prince, (B) a suave S.O.B, (C.) with ears, whiskers, and a kitty snout, it’s nothing more than manifested creativity with her feelings and imagination. A plot device for comedy. F u c k  y o u. With our archer-boy, she feels very comfortable (at level with Tatsuki, her most precious person), at ease, and not judged, but yeah, put down Uryu some more).  (X)

Chizuru! Any idea why Orihime keeps Chizuru around despite the sexual advances and unwanted contact?

Because Chizuru knows well enough about consent, feelings, and what Orihime is and is not okay with. Orihime is “a nice girl who wouldn’t show displeasure on her face easily.”

Pre-Ichigo’s opinion:

Post-Ichigo’s opinion:

That face is pretty damn displeased.

Even someone, who is unseasoned in the mannerisms of Orihime, had this to say:

What happened?

Don’t get me wrong, Ichigo hasn’t and won’t ever objectify, degrade, judge, or make feel little a woman (especially on clothing choices, aesthetics, or looks), but it’s interesting to note that Orihime was perfectly calm, perfectly happy, and perfectly comfortable until Ichigo’s opinion was asked for. Sado brought up the topic that flustered her, but until Ichigo’s opinion, she wasn’t actively putting herself down. She put herself down because of someone else’s opinions. She thought herself gross and felt herself be sexualized.

“He thinks I’m a pervert…”

“He thinks I’m gross and look like an exhibitionist…”

“Don’t get me wrong, Kurosaki-kun.”

He thinks, He says, He doesn’t like.

It’s a very Ichigo-centric way of defense. Surely, Orihime has her own personal opinion about the outfit on her body. She seemed okay with going out in it, she seemed okay with it in the presence of Urahara, Yoruichi, and Sado, and she seemed fine before Ichigo’s opinion. 

That’s why IchiRuki fans say it’s not healthy. We don’t care about this in the name of IchiRuki, we care about this in the name of Orihime. I could so easily make this a conjunction for pro-IchiRuki points, but this moment is so filthy, so morally-corrupted and the support for it so complacent, so disgusting that it’s in poor taste to do anything but fight for proper Orihime treatment.

All this to say: a woman who organizes her life to maximize the potential of getting in between Orihime’s legs and a man who fingered a woman without warning have better grasps of consent, respect, and decency than your entire fandom. Fuck you.

And what’s more? Yoruichi and Urahara don’t give two shits about consent. 

Urahara put the Hōgyoku in Rukia’s body against her knowledge and will, sold Rukia an artificial body that would inhibit her strength, atrophy her muscles, and halt her recovery, disabled Rukia’s body movement to prevent her from going Ichigo, forced Yoruichi’s transformation, trained Ichigo while purposefully not disclosing the life-threatening details or preconditions. made Orihime an outfit manufactured to bust open if she was no longer comfortable and chose to cover up, etc. 

Yoruichi showed an underage Ichigo her naked body despite his lack of consent and visible embarrassment, shoved her fist through Ichigo’s stomach to directly inject a drug, groped Orihime without consent, etc. 

Do you see a pattern? They’re a little more complex than plot devices intended to mature Ichigo and Orihime’s physical relationship. They don’t care. Pushing the IH agenda is not in their job description or their preferences.

Leave the defense against perverts and sewing of custom made clothes to her one true love.

Everyone’s much happier that way.

[asexualchemist]

Get to know me - tagged by @payeehay :P

Rules: Answer the questions and then tag 20 (nope, no sir) blogs you’d like to get to know better

Nickname: Iva, Bells, Vul/Vuli used to be a thing too

Zodiac sign: Virgo. And I think a water rooster in the chinese zodiac?

Height: idk somewhere between 167 and 169 cm

Last thing you googled: “Hahn english” because I could only remember the less PG word for rooster lol

Favourite music artist: ??? I kinda listen to pretty much anything I stumble over... I guess Toby Fox, currently, as embarrassing as that is

Song stuck in my head: Pray to the dark from Fire Emblem fates... up until I searched for it on youtube, saw the video below it and now its the Dark Song from the same game (also Azura’s hips make me reconsider my aceness whoops)

Last Movie you watched: I have no idea. I think it might have been a “lets drunkenly watch bad movies” in which case it was Divergent, I think? Also I got weirdly invested. it was fun Why did you choose your URL: ...look I was super proud of noticing that you can combine __-sexual with alchemist and also just figured out I was ace and started hc-ing Ed Elric as ace and... yeah.

Do you have any other blogs: @punriel is my Undertale-sideblog and my first Tumblr-blog is probably still around too somewhere...

What did your last relationship teach you: ahahahahaha “last relationship”

Religious or spiritual: nah. I want to believe (spiritually, of Religion I am... Not A Fan.) but... eh.

Favorite colour: yellowish lime green!

Average hours of sleep: ????? varies between like 3 and 8. I prefer 8 so hopefully closer to that. Probably like 6-7

Lucky Number: 8!!

Favourite Characters: Ichigo Kurosaki, Toshiro Hitsugaya (Bleach), Edward Elric, Roy Mustang (FMA), Undyne, Sans, Grillby, Chara (Undertale), Hanzo Shimada (Overwatch), ... there’s probably more. I have a weird tendency to like the older brother when there is one lol

How many blankets do you sleep with: One. Unless its REALLY cold.

Dream Job: ...video game tester. ^^’

I...am not tagging anyone because everyone I occasionally talk to was already tagged by payeehay anyway. (Except for Cams and if you even read this: you can if you want but like. Pretty sure you already answered most/all of those at some point anyway so probably no point lol) (Also Liz-Liz if u read this, first: why the fuck are you on tumblr again, second: dooooo iiiiit)

[insolezce]

          ha ha - whoops