#em reads alex rider

[thesamestarlight]

yassen gregorovich. character of all time. he’s a contract killer. he’s babygirl. he makes no damn sense. compels me though

[koreanbibliophilegirl]

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who liked or reblogged something from you! Get to know your mutuals and followers

/not forcing

Hihi!! Thanks for the ask!!!

1. Reading! Mostly fiction, but anything that's Not Math™️ should be fine lol. I've been so busy studying these last few years(the woes of Asian education systems, haha😅), but I read <Mickey7> a while ago, which was amazing. I've also been meaning to pick back up on <Guns, Germs, and Steel> by Jared Diamond. It's a bit difficult I guess, but it's so interesting! Which leads to the second thing:

2. Humanities. Something about humanities just appeals to me, yknow? History, art, literature, etc.

3. Writing!!! I have so many WIPs and not enough finished works OTL. My current biggest projects are my DSMP superpower AU(named, but not revealing for now), Temporal Transcendence(SBI-centric DSMP fic), and Project Orpheus(DSMP fic-turned-original fiction). I love my babies.

4. Cherry coke. Hehe🍒🥤💕

5. Music, movies, TV shows, anything to watch/listen to while chilling! I listen to a lot of rock(?) & pop I think? Currently obsessed with Em Beihold's <Numb Little Bug> and Panic! At The Disco's <High Hopes>, plus Alan Walker's discography. Fall Out Boy and CG5 are also cool! For movies, <The Emperor's New Groove>, most Ghibli movies(I haven't watched the more recent ones yet, which is why I say "most"), and <Nimona> come to mind. My favorite shows are <Alex Rider>(based on one of my favorite books), <Bee and Puppycat>, and <Mashle: Magic and Muscles>(though I only just started watching it last Sunday)! Plus <The Umbrella Academy>, nearly forgot haha.

Again, thanks for the ask!!

-Lilly xx

[yeenybeanies]

Smallest Cyber Specialist (pt. 10)

in which price sets pip down for a little chat & check in. poor gal's had one helluva week. now that alex is confirmed back & alive, i'm SCRAMBLING… (don't get me wrong i'm delighted to see my beloved yankee again but) i was already struggling to work his disappearance into the timeline & now it's all just an even bigger mess --w-- oh well. we don't need to pay attention to canon timelines! this is fanfiction! so what i say in my story goes. first • previous • next call of duty | john mactavish/soap, john price, & pip lagomorph/lag (oc) 4,392 words strong language warning thanks for reading!! patreon ✨ ko-fi ✨ ao3

The sound of approaching boots woke Pip from her nap. Her body stiffened, stock still under the cover of her newly finished pelt. It wasn’t perfect—not near as lifelike as she would have made if she’d had access to proper hideling tools—but it would still serve its purpose when needed.

As the boots drew closer, Pip realized that she knew those footsteps. That gait. The hideling sat up abruptly, the pelt draped over her head and shoulders like a hooded cloak. “Soap?”

“The one and only,” the sergeant said. Pip pulled the hare head—her hood—down and shook her head, her hair a little unruly from her nap. Soap came to stand in front of the table, hands on his hips. “Feeling any better?” 

Pip’s face went sour. “Not particularly,” she said flatly. She ran her fingers through her hair to smooth the errant strands. It didn’t help much. “Sorry if I woke you up last night.” 

“You didn’t,” Soap said. He rested his hands on the table and bent down to be closer to her level. “Matter of fact, of all the people I’ve shared a bunk with, you’re the least disruptive.” 

Wonder why. “So then why did you wake up?” she asked. 

Soap reached for her—no, her pelt. He pinched one of the tiny paws between his thumb and forefinger, and gently rubbed the fur. Pip surprised herself with the realization that she barely tensed up at the action. 

“Not sure,” he answered. For a moment, he looked thoughtful. But then his goofy smirk appeared. “Maybe I sensed you were upset through our handler’s bond.”��

That smirk had been a warning. A precursor. Before the words even left his mouth, Pip braced herself, fully expecting him to say something ridiculous. And there it was. She stared at him, face blank, for a long moment. His smirk bloomed into a full-blown grin. 

There was one good thing about humans having multiple names. Pip could pull a lesser-used name for greater emphasis on what she had to say: “MacTavish, what the fuck are you talking about?” 

“Y’know, our bond!” Soap explained. He dropped the paw he held and nudged Pip’s shoulder with a gentle knuckle. “Like—like the bond between man and dog!” 

Pip grimaced and pushed back against his knuckle. “I hate dogs.”

“Ach—I suppose you would. I don’t like ‘em much either.” Surprising. That there was something they had in common. “Let me try again: like the bond between a horse and its rider.” 

Really, what the fuck was this man going on about? Pip gave Soap a look-over, her brows furrowed. “Are you… are you the horse in this analogy…?” 

“No, but—” Soap started to protest, but he stopped short. There was something about how he pursed his lips in a little pout when he thought… Ugh, none of that, Pip. “Actually, I guess I would be. Me and the rest of your handlers. Considerin’ we carry you around everywhere.” 

“Not by my choice,” Pip grumbled to herself. 

Soap laid his hand down next to her, palm up. “C’mon, Lag. Your mighty steed wants some breakfast, and he’s guessin’ you do too.” 

Why was he like this? “Why are you like this? Talking about yourself in third person, referring to yourself as a ‘steed.’” She wasn’t laughing, but a part of her—a part that she was mentally beating back with a stick—did find it kinda funny. Just a little bit. She wasn’t about to tell Soap that, though. 

Nevertheless, Pip quickly gathered her belongings, donned her backpack under her pelt, and crawled onto Soap’s hand. They were already in the mess hall, so it wasn’t like they had far to go. She gestured vaguely. “Onward then, steed.” 

Much of the morning went by in a relative blur. Pip shared breakfast with Soap, who didn’t seem to take any offense when she fell into relative silence as he rambled on. She did feel a bit bad about it, but she just didn’t have it in her to engage in much banter right now. He'd spent all of her banter points right in the beginning. Gaz came as a saving grace, giving Soap another outlet for his chatty nature so Pip could… could wallow. 

That was the best description she could give herself for what she was doing. She was wallowing in grief. 

Hard fucking week.  

As the sergeants conversed, and more people gradually filed in and out of the mess hall, Pip found herself lost in thought with eyes unfocused. 

She and Bash, at one point, had been nearly joined at the hip. They’d grown codependent of each other early on. She huffed to herself, remembering how one of their instructors had forced them to work separately. It had sucked at the time, of course, but Pip knew that it was better for them in the long run. It was better for her. Gave her room to grow into her role. How would she have been able to do her job had they been allowed to stay together? She likely never would have met Alex, nor Looker…

Fuck.  

Pip sighed, scrubbing a hand through her hair. Her eyes wandered down to the cast on her leg, and the dark signatures scribbled across it. 

She never would have ended up here, with the 141. 

Whether that was a good or a bad thing, she hadn’t yet decided. The situation she found herself in currently was awful, of course, but these four men… they weren’t so bad. 

Gods, though, she missed Bash. She missed Alex. Missed Looker. Her heart ached…

“Oi, Earth to Lag. You in there, lass?” A poke to her shoulder made the hideling flinch, suddenly back in the mess hall. She blinked, looking a little lost. 

“Huh? Wha…?” Looming over her was Captain Price. When had he gotten here? She hadn’t heard his approach. He regarded her with one brow raised, inquisitive. “Captain,” she greeted, nodding her head. “Sorry, sir, did you say something?” 

“I did,” he said. “Asked if you’ve finished with any of that data you nabbed.” 

“Oh.” Pip pulled her backpack closer and set it in her lap. “For the most part, yes, sir. There are a few more files I want to comb through, but I think I’ve gotten just about everything useful that I can from—”

Price held up his hand, silencing her. “We’ll talk in my office. C’mon.” He set that hand down behind her, silently asking to pick her up. Or, more likely, he was letting her know that he was going to pick her up. She hesitated, the inside of her cheek drawn between her teeth, then nodded. Thick fingers slipped around her middle, scooping her, her pelt, and her pack up in one fell swoop. He cupped his other hand under her to support her, and straightened to address the sergeants. “Gentlemen,” he said with a nod, then strode on out of the mess hall with Pip in hand. 

Why did he want to talk in his office? Why couldn’t they go over her findings in the mess hall, with Gaz and Soap? Wouldn’t it have been easier with them present? They were likely going to need to know this stuff later anyway—

“Relax,” Price said, once again yanking Pip from her thoughts. She looked up to see him staring straight ahead, though she suspected he was watching her through his peripherals. “Either you’re shaking more than normal, or that’s your heart I feel buzzing in your chest.” His fingers shifted, his thumb pushing under her pelt to rest against her back.

Sure enough, her heart was pounding. It slammed back against her ribs, against the pad of his thumb. She was letting herself get worked up. “I’m fine, Captain.” 

“You’re a shit liar in person.” 

She pulled a sour face. Price was the second person to tell her that lately. She’d heard it before from Alex and Looker, too. 

Upon entering Price’s office, the captain closed the door behind him, and set Pip down on his desk. He rounded it to take his seat, and opened up his laptop. Pip dug her own laptop from her bag and set it down on her lap, pulling up the important documents she’d compiled in her analysis. 

“So,” she started, “I’ll send you what I’ve found—” 

“Hold off on that,” Price said, cutting her off. He leaned forward, hands folding on the desk. Pip felt a sense of alarm rising in her chest. Her heart quickened again. “Laswell called me this morning.” 

More alarm. It rushed through her like a jolt of electricity. Pip swallowed thickly, but said nothing. Price continued. 

“Calm down, Pip. She was just askin’ about you, how you’re holding up after… well, everything.” 

Pip took a breath, trying to ease her anxiety. “What… did you tell her?” 

“Told her you’re doing fine,” he said. “But I know that’s not quite true. So I want you to tell me how you’re doing.” 

He wanted her to talk to him? About her problems? Her personal woes? Pip found herself immediately resistant to that idea. She scrunched her nose and breathed out sharply. “Captain, I’m f—” 

“Don’t…” Price held up a finger, his eyes narrowing, “...tell me you’re ‘fine.’ Don’t lie to me, Pip.” 

He was using her name. Not her callsign. Not the stupid nickname he’d given her. He was using her name. A shiver crawled down Pip’s spine. He was turning that human-multiple-names thing against her.

“This isn’t necessary, Captain,” she said, trying to keep her voice even. “You’re right—I’m not fine. But my problems are my own.” 

“I lead this task force,” he said. “My people’s problems are my problems.” 

Pip wanted to retort that she wasn’t his people. She opened her mouth, intent on saying just that, but she stopped herself and took a breath. Slow in, slow out. Calm down. 

The fact that he did think of her as his people… well, she didn’t want to examine how that made her feel right now. 

“Price, with all due respect… I would prefer it if you didn’t pry into my personal matters. This… turmoil I find myself in won’t affect my work. I promise you that.” 

Price leaned back in his seat, one hand swiping thoughtfully over his mustache and chin. “I’m sure you think that,” he said. Pip felt a spark of indignation rising in her. That sounded awfully patronizing. The man continued, “And I do believe you. To an extent. I’m not worried about your work, though, Pip. Far as I’m concerned, you do damn good work. The shit you did yesterday?” He sucked his teeth and shook his head. “Impressive stuff. I told you as much.”

Hearing the compliments again made her fidget uncomfortably. This conversation was giving her a lot of mixed signals. “So… if you’re not worried about my work suffering, then why are we talking about this? I have intel that you need to see. That’s more important.” 

Price stared at her for a long moment, long enough to make her squirm. That indignation was getting hotter, kindling inside her. “We’re talking about this,” he said finally, “because I’m worried about you. Not your work, but your well-being.” 

What…?

Pip jerked her head back, reacting almost as if she’d been struck. “Wha—you’re— what?” 

The captain rolled his eyes. “Shocking, I know, to learn that the captain cares about his people.” Pip opened her mouth again, ready to refute that statement now, but Price cut her off once more, “And don’t you give me any shit about you ‘not working for me.’ I can see you tossing that argument around in that little head of yours.” 

Pip made an offended noise. Price reached for her, gently pinching her jaw between his thumb and forefinger to make her look at him. 

“Like it or not, while you’re out here, with us, you’re one of mine,” he said. There was a low growl in his voice that stirred something in her core.

It was so easy to feel powerless around humans. Pip swallowed, almost sure that Price could feel the bob in her throat. She didn’t like feeling powerless. So, voice low, she said “Take your hand off of me.” It was an effort to maintain some control of herself and her surroundings. 

And Price did as requested. As he was told. Pip found that a little surprising, if she was being honest with herself, but nevertheless her relief was immediate. She rubbed at her jaw, where his skin had met hers. 

“Did I hurt you?” he asked, a bit softer. 

“No,” she said quickly. That wasn’t a lie. 

“Good. So here’s how this is gonna go, Pip.” Price retreated from her immediate space and folded his hands again. “You and I are gonna chat about what’s bothering you. Then you can tell me all about that intel, yeah?” He met her scowl with a raised brow. She had a feeling that she was not being given much choice here. So much for having control. 

Even still, she felt compelled to ask: “And if I refuse?” 

The skin and muscle wrinkled around his eyes, a tight, mirthless smile spreading under his mustache. “Then I’m sending you back to Laswell.” 

“What —?” Her jaw dropped. She grabbed her crutch and moved to stand, but Price held up a hand. He didn’t touch her. He didn’t have to. It was warning enough to stay seated. Pip eased back down, lip curled just so. “Sir. You said so yourself: I’m helping. Why would you send me away?”

“I know this might seem unfair—”

“Do not patronize me,” she hissed. She was getting sick of repeating this. “Speak to me like an adult.” 

Price flexed his jaw to the side, none-too-appreciative of her tone. “What I mean to say is: I’m not singling you out. I do this with the others, too. Gaz, Soap, everyone.” 

“Ghost?” 

Ah, shit. She regretted her question as soon as it left her mouth.

Price breathed out a wry chuckle. “Especially Simon. That man needs it more than anyone.” 

Pip looked away, chewing the inside of her lip. Guilt was creeping onto the edge of her conscience. Price seemed to notice. 

“Oh… you’ve gone digging where you shouldn’t, huh?” He didn’t sound surprised or angry so much as disappointed. Remorseful. Pip didn’t need to answer. “Do us all a favor and keep it to yourself.” 

Yeah. Yeah, she would. After finishing most of her work last night, she'd gotten a little too curious for her own good, and poked through some of the "non-existent" documents she'd found under Ghost's file. She’d learned the hard way why those files had been so tightly sealed.

And now she was just going to have to carry on like she didn't know. Great. She wasn't looking forward to seeing him again any time soon.

“Enough about them,” Price continued. “Go on then. Tell me what’s bothering you.” 

“John, I—” woah. Hearing his first name on her tongue seemed to surprise the both of them. Pip shook her head and tried again. “Price, I really… really don’t want to do this.” 

His shoulders rose and fell in a shrug. “Then don’t. I’ll let Laswell know, and have you on a plane by day’s end.” 

Bastard. She didn’t want that either! She wasn't a quitter! She wouldn't leave this hellhole mission until it was done! The hideling ducked her head and scrubbed her fingers through her hair with a frustrated groan. 

Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck—

“Rot in the fucking sun, you—” she grumbled in hidespeak, then steeled herself and switched back to English. “Fine. Laswell told me yesterday that my best friend—a hideling I grew up with and went through training with—went missing weeks ago. His handler was found dead, and he’s presumed dead as well, though his body and belongings were not recovered. I find this distressing for a number of reasons.” 

Price watched her carefully, saying nothing. 

She continued, “His name is—was? fuck—his name is Bash. And he’s the closest thing to family that I had.” Her voice shook. Pip cleared her throat and forced her words around the lump rising there. “So I’m not… taking it well.”

“Understandable,” Price said with a nod. 

“And then—and then I’m still reeling from Looker dying. He—he was my handler, my partner, for four years , Price. And he’s just… he's just gone .” Pip stared down at her hands, watching them shake in her lap. “I didn’t even get to see him before you guys sent his body back…”

“We didn’t know that—” Price started, but it was Pip’s turn to interrupt him with a raised hand. 

“Not your fault. I know. It’s just… Ugh. And then his ex-wife was making a fuss, trying to contact me, and I…” 

“His ex-wife…? Bloody hell, Pip…” That disappointment was back. It stung a little. “Don’t tell me you called her…”

“It was stupid. I know. I didn’t tell her anything about me, or what we’re doing—obviously—but…” Her shoulders shook with a heavy sigh. “I don’t even know why I called her. She’s a jealous, spiteful woman, and the conversation just made me feel worse.” 

“I could’ve told you that would happen,” Price said. 

“Wish you had.” 

“Would have, had you said something.” 

Pip huffed. Yeah. Any of her handlers probably would have done the same. She should have just let Ghost talk her out of it last night. 

“Didn’t know Looker well,” Price said. “When Laswell sent him over, I only had a couple quick conversations with him before he…” He trailed off, and Pip was thankful for it. “He seemed like a decent enough bloke, though. I am sorry we lost him.”

“Yeah… Yeah, he was…” She sniffled, but swallowed down any other threats of crying. Price did not get to see her cry. "Anyway,” she continued, “all of this has just… well, Bash is the third person close to me that I've lost recently. And it’s just… a lot. On top of the stress of being forcibly revealed to all of you.” 

Price reached for her again, but stopped short of touching her. His hand stilled behind her, not yet making contact. “Is this okay?” he asked. After a moment of contemplation, she nodded. His fingers curled around her back, draping over her shoulders. She sighed under the weight and hung her head, eyes closed. Price’s warmth seeped into her through her pelt and jumpsuit.

“You said Bash was the third. Guessing Looker was the second. Who was first?” 

Pip reached up to pull her pelt tighter around herself, but instead found the pad of Price’s index finger. It twitched under her touch, but neither of them pulled away. She sighed, and continued, “Found out about two months ago that my first handler went missing in Urzikstan.” She laughed dryly, her hand idly running over the whorls of Price’s fingerprint. “Took that one hard too, because I thought I’d lost him once before when he got blown up a few years back.” 

The fingers behind her went tense. Pip glanced back at them, then up to Price’s face, brows furrowed. He gave her a similar look. “Alex ? Alex Keller?” Hearing his name, the hideling straightened, her heart in her throat. “Alex was your handler?” 

“Y–yes…? Wait, you knew him?” 

Price sighed and rubbed at his forehead with his free hand, his eyes going distant. “He and I worked together in Urzikstan back in 2019. I led the team with him, Gaz, and Farah. I was there when that factory went up. We all thought he’d died then too. But then the bastard turned up a month later with a shiny new leg.” 

Pip couldn’t help another sniffle. She was starting to choke up again, but she was determined not to cry. Not here. “When he got assigned to take on Al-Quatala, I was forced to part ways with him,” she said. “At the time, our council didn’t allow us to go overseas much—certainly not to active war zones.” 

“And here you are now…” His thumb brushed her arm, offering a small comfort. 

“Yeah,” she said flatly. “Here I am now. Half blown up myself, being forced to talk about my personal problems to one of my four new handlers.” 

Despite it being forced, though, Pip did feel a little bit better, having aired all of her woes out. She’d sooner die than tell Price that, but it was true regardless. 

The hand curled around her, gently lifting her off of the desk and cupping beneath her to bring her closer to Price’s level. “Hey,” he said, feigning offense, “We’re not all that bad. I can see you’re getting used to us. Even coming around to liking us.” 

Pip scoffed and rolled her eyes. The humor was a sudden, but not unwelcome change of pace. Maybe she did still have a few banter points left after all. “Gaz is okay. I guess.” 

Price gave her a knowing, infuriatingly smug look. “So you’ve expressed a liking for Soap, Ghost, and now Gaz. No love for your captain, ey?” 

Her captain? Hah! 

Pip turned her eyes up in thought, counting on her fingers, “Mendoza, Jacobs, and Reed got me this hare, so I guess they’re okay too…” 

That got a balk from Price. He nudged her shoulder with his thumb, much less comforting this time. “That right? You called me John a few minutes ago, and now you say you like rookies more than me?” He almost sounded offended, but the smile under his mustache and the amusement in his eyes betrayed him. 

Pointedly not meeting Price’s eyes, Pip instead peered over his hands, to his desk and the floor below. “Hm. Bet I could make that jump, even with this cast…” 

As was the expected reaction, the captain’s hands cupped around her more, walling her between them. “Don’t. I’ve had Nik set your next vet appointment for next week already; don’t need you limping around on two broken legs until then.” 

Her expression fell to a scow immediately. “Fucking vet,” she spat. “Unbelievable. I’m still mad about that.” 

Price shrugged. “Vets specialize in binding tiny limbs. It’s the best place to patch you up.” 

Yeah, yeah, she understood the reasoning, but she didn’t have to like it. “And after putting me through that humiliation, you still don’t give me anything to drink for the pain.” 

“Bloody hell.” Price tipped his head back in exasperation. He shifted to hold Pip in one hand so he could gesticulate with his other. “You were just in my hidden stash last night.” 

Pip’s blood ran cold. “Uh…” She found herself suddenly tongue-tied, her cheeks heating in embarrassment. “I don’t, uh—”

“And I know Simon’s the one that takes you.” 

Shit. How'd he find out? Not just about last night, but the time before, too! She wasn’t about to rat Ghost out, though. Pip shook her head adamantly. “No. I found it myself.” 

Price chuckled. “Not gettin’ any better at this lying thing, Lag. Your whole body goes tense, and you look like a deer in headlights. Never mind that your story is bullshit. You can barely walk.” He tapped the knee of her cast for emphasis. “Let alone lift a floor panel and unscrew a bottle.” 

“You have no idea what I’m capable of,” she retorted. “With or without this cast. Isn’t it a human saying, ‘if there’s a will, there’s a way’?” 

His smile spread into a grin, thoroughly amused. “Part of me hates that you’re lying right to my face, but a bigger part of me loves that you’re trying to protect Simon. Wholly unnecessary, by the way. But I’m sure he’d appreciate it too.” 

The hideling refused to meet his eyes, her cheeks and ears burning. “Are we done now?” She was pretty eager for another topic change. This conversation had already gone on far longer and taken more turns than she wanted. 

Price lowered his hand back down to the desk and let her off next to her laptop. “Sure. Just one last thing. Look at me, Lag.” Reluctantly, she did. “I’m sorry for your losses. Truly I am. We’re holding out that Alex might still be alive, but you know how this goes.” 

Pip nodded. “Yeah. I do,” she said softly. When he said nothing more, she took that as her cue to start her briefing. 

Finally.  

They’d wasted enough time and energy on her emotional bullshit. 

As she was pulling up and sending over documents, she heard Price shuffling around in one of his desk drawers. She didn't bother looking up until she heard the unmistakable sound of a lighter sparking to life. Her head snapped up, immediately finding a cigar between the captain’s fingers. He rotated it slowly, expertly, to give it a proper light. Just before putting it between his lips, though, he caught Pip staring, and winced. 

“Ah, bollocks—probably shouldn’t smoke around you. Sorry—” 

Before he could snub it out, Pip waved her hands. “Don’t! No, it’s—it’s fine. Go ahead. Don’t mind me.” 

He regarded her curiously, lips pressed together in a frown. “You sure? ‘Cos I can wait until we’re done—”

“Don’t,” she insisted. “I, uh… I like the smell…” Already, she could detect the sweet, almost chocolatey notes of the cigar, and he hadn’t even taken a puff yet. It made her mouth water. 

Hesitantly, but without breaking eye contact, Price placed the cigar between his lips, and drew in a mouthful of smoke. Pip forced herself to look away, not wanting to ogle any more than she already had. When he expelled the smoke into the air between them, Pip felt a shiver race up her spine and across her skin. She breathed in deep as the white wisps curled around her, her lips parted slightly to take in the full flavor. 

It tasted rich, sweet, and very much like John Price. 

Keep it together, Pip, fuck’s sake!  

She cleared her throat, tried to clear her head, and sent the last file over to Price’s computer. “Okay, so—if you’ll check what I sent you, the first packet is all the highlights of what I’ve found. The second one is the specifics I’ve compiled—stuff you’ve asked me to look for, and stuff I thought seemed relevant or helpful…” 

Gods help her. She was a fucking mess.

[artistfingers]

Hey :) I've been seeing ur posts about Alex rider and they look pretty interesting. I love whump but also never read them as a kid so I don't have the nostalgia value plus I don't usually enjoy media for children these days, though there are exceptions. Would you recommend them?

hi nonny!!

you're asking someone whose nostalgia probably colors their opinion, but i'd say yes, they're worth the read!

but, I'm not sure i'd readily recommend all the AR books. the earliest ones especially have a number of flaws in their portrayals of characters, and don't take themselves that seriously. i'd call them fun brain candy, solidly YA. fun reads, but maybe not what you're looking for.

i feel like the books grew up with their audience over time so while the latter half of the series is still YA, their tone feels more mature and well-rounded both emotionally and thematically. the writing smooths out, and the stakes are given real consequences, which i often felt was missing from early books.

if you're interested in the series as a whole, i'd say it's best to treat the books like fun brain candy. don't take 'em too seriously when they don't take themselves too seriously; and when they buckle down, you buckle down. adventure, spy shenanigans, anything-goes teen protag, good shit!

though if you're reading primarily for whump, i'd steer you more towards the latter half of the books. maybe like, Scorpia (book 5) and on? (mind, I haven't reread since early 2021 now, and I can't be held to complete accuracy for what events happen when in the timeline anymore hadgsf). OR, i'd direct you to the show as it takes a serious tone from the get-go, and fixes many of the narrative issues of the early books.

hope this helps!! B)

[blacklight-animal-print]

possible milex "night out" references in the album:

"Tell him what you want and, baby, he can find you Anything you need, tell him what you're needing Come on, miracle aligner, go and get 'em, tiger Get down on your knees, get down on your knees again"

^ the song is about a cocaine dealer, so. There's that connotation. Also why are we getting on our knees? Something to think about.

"Ghost riders in the rat and parrot"

^ There's just so so many things about this line. It could mean a million things. First of all, we all know "Rat and Parrot" is a popular bar name, so there's that. In the genius lyrics, it mentions that "ghost riding" is the practice of having sex with a girl in the dark and then leaving sneakily so your friend can resume having sex with her in your place. So. Bad habits would also give that impression, specifically the mv (3sum vibes, ifykwim) ...

"Ghost riders" are just so sneaky. Why are we being sneaky in a bar, Milex?

"Dirtbag ballet by the bins down the alley"

^ no explanation needed, I think.

"Hotel room, Holy Bible Hotel room, free love revival Baby, it's a never-ending spiral Looks a little bit like Paris"

^ this doesn't read like a night out in LA to me, per se. But this has always been the most incriminating verse on all of the album in my mind.

Just the mention of "holy bible" and "free love" together in a verse makes me think things. It feels very lgbt to me, but there's different and even more incriminating ways to think. Wikipedia defines free love as: "Free love is a social movement that accepts all forms of love. The movement's initial goal was to separate the state from sexual and romantic matters such as marriage, birth control, and adultery." So, you know. Adultery, cheating. Sexual relations in a hotel room that the government (nor anyone else) should have no say over...

And we all know the importance of France to Milex's relationship.

"I’m a liar, I’m a cheat A leech, a thief"

^ more of a stretch, but there's just more cheating imagery for you.

"Black-light animal print boogie, left in a heap"

^ Impossible to tell if this is a reference to a specific person (either Miles or Alex, since they've both worn their fair share of animal print at clubs and parties and probably got their clothes left in a heap somewhere as the night progressed). But, you know.

All of She Does the Woods is, well. More debauchery. I hold a personal theory that having sex in the woods is something Miles has done before, and then described to Alex later in great detail (based on that one tweet, which could have been an Oasis reference, could have not):

And then they wrote a song together to perform as a duet. Bro things.

...

There's more, probably. Where's that quote from that interview about how the whole album is basically about "shagging.." ? Because it is, honestly. With maybe a hint of Milex. Who can say for sure? Mostly seems like the guys were up to some devious actions that they didn't want to outwardly admit to in an interview.

text id:

It's not hard to draw the conclusion that there are tales from the tiles of the city that both now call home. Turner has lived in LA for a while now (it's home "for the foreseeable, I think"), while Kane recently moved out permanently, after a few trips which "would always extend, because the new air felt good." The pair live, Turner says, "seven minutes away from each other."

Ask them what a typical night out entails, and they look at each other, then proceed to not be very forthcoming, though Turner will eventually concede that "some of what happens in those situations is disclosed, through the veil of song, on the record. There's references."

/end id

(x)

[thyfavouritegay]

Thy Favourite Gay: Intro to Me

Hello! ‘Tis I, Thomas, AKA thyfavouritegay here on Tumblr. My blog is... sort of (completely) a mess of things, so I write this to be a me masterpost. In this post, I will be going over numerous things, including: fandoms I am in/will interact with, some triggers and DNIs, as well as some fun facts. This, I predict, will be terrible to write as well as read, so I suppose I should get started.

Fun facts:

I am a mild grammar/spelling nerd, and although I am trying to not to bug people with corrections these days, I will talk in what my friends (both real-life and online) call a “Shakespearian”, “old English-ish”, and “fancy as fuck” tone quite often. I like calling it my “heretically incorrect mocking of old English”, but I’ll take what I can get.

I am genderfluid, omniromantic, and asexual. To me, this is to say that my gender changes and shifts---which is why I say “default to they/them” instead of just “they/them” because I don’t want to be seen as bearing unchanging pronouns, I can feel romantic attraction to all genders in different ways and attraction ratios (like, male:female:enby umbrella, how often to I catch feelings for each) but do not feel comfortable using the labels bi or pan because of the assumptions and biases behind them, and I feel no attraction to anyone sexually. If you have questions, feel free to ask me (not because I am queer and have any manner of obligation to explain myself, but because I enjoy rambling)!

I have way too many OCs, help. Also too many fictional worlds.

I am bilingual! I am fluent in English and French (my native language is English though), and am also learning Norwegian and Japanese.

Organizational Tags

I use ‘em. Here is a link that will take you to a post explaining all of them!

Fandoms I will/have interact(ed) with:

Podcasts:

Welcome to Nightvale

Brimstone Valley Mall

The Bright Sessions (Including TCT and TAMA)

The Scarab Archives

The Mistholme Museum of Mystery, Morbidity, and Mortality

Look Up

Comics (Includes manga, webcomics, and other things of the like):

Hanamonogatari

Batman

Astro Boy

Superman

Whisper Me a Love Song

Animated TV shows and movies (Cartoons, anime, and other of the like):

Steven Universe (Including SUF and the movie)

Death Note

Yuri!!! on Ice

Dead End: Paranormal Park

Centaurworld

Spiderverse series

Astro Boy

Nimona

Gravity Falls

Barbie Mermaidia

The Owl House

Puella Magi Madoka Magica

Avatar the Last Airbender

The Disastrous Life of Saiki K

Unanimated TV shows and movies:

Star Trek (Specifically TNG and DS9, with some LWD, SNW, VOY, and TOS)

Good Omens

Umbrella Academy

The Barbie Movie

Community

Goncharov.

Everything Everywhere All at Once

Heartstopper

Gameboys

Racket Boys

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Books:

Artemis Fowl (And sometimes Alex Rider in relation)

Percy Jackson and the Olympians (Including the rest of the universe)

Iron Widow

The School for Good and Evil

A Series of Unfortunate Events

Plays or musicals:

Romeo and Juliet

Hamilton

Games:

Dungeons and Dragons

Plants versus Zombies (One and Two)

Triggers and DNIs:

Warning: This may be a triggering section for people, therefore reader discretion is advised! Stay safe! If you choose not to read this bit, that’s cool too! Enjoy my blog!

DNIs:

Pro-shippers

Supporters (not just fans, people can consume toxic media without supporting the toxicity of it) of the oh-so-popular Dream

Ableists, racists, islamaphobes, anti-semites, misogynists, aphobes, biphobes, homophobes, and transphobes (This shouldn’t need to be said, but I will write it anyways because sometimes people are just stupid on the internet.)

People make fun of others for innocent interests and/or unchangeable things about themselves.

Triggers:

Kidnapping 

Self-harm

Suicide

Rape/sexual assault

Trafficking (not traffic itself)

Eating disorders

[irelise]

I M V let’s see em. Also do you have any hidden AR art…

Thanks for the ask Valaks!!! <333

I: Do you have a guilty pleasure in fic (reading or writing)?

Unexpected moments of gentleness from Yassen, especially when he calls Alex "Sasha"... Does absolutely everyone do it? Yes. Do I eat it up with a spoon every time anyway? Hell yes.

.......nsfw-wise a/b/o and all related kinks is probably the big guilty pleasure especially when it's very dark and fucked up... Although I haven't seen it done for AR yet... hint hint

M: Got any premises on the back burner that you’d care to share?

Abandoned fic based on an idea from someone affectionately termed the dogwalker AU - adult!Alex is one of MI6's agents and has been ever since his Uncle Ian's unsolved murder. His next mission? Going under as a dogwalker to get close to the enigmatic man known as Yassen Gregorovich - who Jones suspects has something to do with Ian Rider's death. Alex's main role is simple information gathering, but Gregorovich is a dangerous man with far too much blood on his hands - if Alex gets the chance, he's expected to carry out his secondary mission: kill Yassen Gregorovich.

........alternatively, non-con fic that might never get written: RR-era Yassen who has warmed Sharkovsky's bed on occasion and had mostly gone along with it without any sort of fight.

...Then the reveal that Sharkovsky was the one responsible for the destruction of Estrov and the death of Leo and his parents comes to light. Suddenly Yassen can no longer bear to have Sharkovsky's hands on him. It doesn't matter, though. Sharkovsky always takes what he wants. Featuring violence, choking and strangulation, Yassen giving in and begging for his life.

Then, many years later, the roles are reversed: this time it's Alex Rider facing the unwanted attentions of the man who had killed his parental figure...

V: If you could write the sequel (or prequel) to any fic out there not written by yourself, which would you choose?

...I would definitely not be doing the writing BUT if we're talking about fic i desperately yearn to see more of... this little snippet from FFA that has stuck in my head since the first time i've read it - I just absolutely adore the power dynamics at play here, the little hints to Yassen's past... please more!

Also do you have any hidden AR art… if it's hidden it means it isn't worthy of seeing the light of day

[thesamestarlight]

finally finished scorpia (many thoughts, head full). while i was waiting for ark angel to be available from the library, i decided to assemble some screenshots of my annotations from when i read eagle strike. i might post the scorpia annotations later, but i have Way More of those so we'll see how long it takes me to get around to it.

seriously. the shark? the sugar mill?? the heartbeat thing?? he's not even facing the bull yet! sure, he's scared, but come on. come on.

it's So Funny how mutual alex thinks the hatred is vs how mutual it isn't

OKAY I READ THIS IN THINGS THAT BLEED AND ASSUMED IT WAS FANON. HE'S JUST THAT TYPE™️. BUT THIS IS REAL??? THIS IS CANON???

HE WAS SO SURE ABOUT IT. HE WAS SO CALM ABOUT IT. AND HE SMILED. DO YOU EVEN GET IT!

i've already been angry about this but. MAN.

anyway. this post was sponsored by the libby app annotation tool. go support your local library and will your favorite character back to life <3

[xaritomene]

Welp, here it is. And hey, it only took me four entire years!

Quick sidenote, lads - if you're going to reread (you brave, brave soul) because I've been gone for the better part of forever, I'd recommend starting around Chapter 11? It is still Very Many Words, for which I'm sorry, but you won't be missing too much by skipping the first eleven chapters. (Which honestly tells you everything you need to know about my ability to plot. I know so many, many words and none of them are concise.) In all seriousness, though, it may be arrogant of me, but I think I've improved since I wrote the first chapters, and once I've finished this darn thing, I'll be doing a rewrite of 'em. So you can get the gist of the story from Chapter 11 onwards, and you won't have to put up with reading my not-so-great writing from when I was like sixteen (I've been writing this story for almost half my life what is wrong with me).

[ineffectualdemon]

Maximum Ride series by James Patterson (classic childhood read, action/science/adventure), Alex Rider series by Anthony Horowitz (similar audience, lots of action/adventure to Artemis Fowl but no magic lol), + any Margaret Peterson Haddix book (specifically the shadow children series or the missing series). I've read them all + loved these types of books as a kid, however these may be seen as heavier-themed than the ones before. You can always read up on 'em and decide! Happy reading! [2/2]

Thank you again for your recommendations :) making sure I answer so other people can see your suggestions

[thedarksidehaskylux]

Tagged by @pastel-nonbinary :3 Last movie I watched: Guardians of the galaxy vol.2 (IM MARY POPPINS YALL) Last song I listened too: Navi band: story of my life (I was on a eurovision marathon ) Last book I read: Alex rider: Never say die by Anthony Horowitz Last thing I ate: cheese and tomato sauce sandwich :/ Where would I time travel?: to a more peaceful time period I guess. Which fictional character would I hang out with for a day: Alex rider. If I could be anywhere I would be: wherever my friends are. Fandom obsession: star wars, star Trek, voltron. Some anime stuff. Ima tag @toxicviolet16 @crisisveryadorable @em-isnotavampire

[ingerlizzy2]

Brutally honest reviews of the 32 books I read this year

Warning:

There are some spoilers below. Also, don’t be offended if I didn’t like a book that you like/love. These are just my personal opinions. Please don’t scream at me for spelling errors. 

The Mark of Athena, The House of Hades and The Blood of Olympus:

I’m doing all three of these in one go because I don’t really have any complaints about any of them. I have really enjoyed all the books I’ve read in the Percy Jackson universe. I find the books amusing and I enjoy the fact that even though some of these books are considered ‘kids’ books, Rick Riordan doesn’t ‘dumb’ down anything to appeal more to younger children. The books are easily read and very enjoyable. It’s easy to find characters that you can relate to and I don’t feel that any of the characters’ arcs were favored over others.

Score: 8/10

Badass Women Score: 9/10

The Demigod files:

Now, this is just me, but I don’t really enjoy these types of short stories. However, as with the other Percy Jackson books, I did find this one to be a good read and it was fun to dive back into some of the old characters’ stories.

Score: 7/10 +1 point for giving me more of Grover’s Blah-hah-hah’s. They have been missed.

Everything Everything:

This book had me in tears- in a good way! I finished this book in about 30 mins and I just couldn’t put it down.

Score: 9/10

Twilight:

I liked it… It made me nostalgic, had me traveling back to my thirteen year old self and my obsession with Edward Cullen. It’s better than the movie, okay?

Score: 5-6/10

Thirteen year old me’s Score: 12/10 *heart eyes* *sigh* 

New moon:

I like me a bit of angst but this ain’t enjoyable. Bella is an idiot and don’t even get me started on how unnecessary this book was for the series. (The movie too.)

Score: 2/10

Usefulness Score: Go die in a hole.

Eclipse:

I like this one the most out of all of them. More action, character ‘development’(I guess) and not everyone is a whiny little bitch in this one.

Score: 7/10

Whiny Score: Not that bad, I guess.

Breaking Dawn:

THIS FUCKING BOOK. I suffered. (SPOILERS!) Jacob is SUCH a whiny asshole in the first half of the book. The rest is meh.

Score: 2-3/10

Jacob Whiny Bitch Score: 100000000/10

Bella willing to die for the dick Score: 10/10

The Fallen series:

Read them, liked almost all of them. The last one had me struggling a bit. I was just not feeling the story anymore- it had just gone on for too long and it became a little annyoing.

Collective Score: 8/10

“You gargoyle bitch.”-Me, 2018

The Last Jedi:

I really loved this book. It was great being able to really step into the minds of my favorite characters and see the story beyond the film.

Biased Reylo Score: 10/10

Hand Porn Score: 12/10

The Infernal Devices:

Second time reading this one. Love the characters (aren’t we all weak for Herondales?), though they’re still not my favorite of the shadowhunter books. I am not as fond of the story in this trilogy as I am of the other series’ storylines. This one isn’t as interesting, in my opinion.

Collective and Biased Herondale Score: 9/10

“Never trust a duck.”- Will Herondale

The Vampire diaries books 1-4:

I like all the characters, except Elena. I think she’s whiny and annoying and she honestly acts more like a child than a teenager/young adult. I don’t like the whole angel plot-thingy and it was hard to continue reading after book two tbh.

Damon Sexy Murder Score: 10/10

Collective Book Score: 4/10

Creepy Pedophile undertones: A little.

Call Me By Your Name:

This book ripped my heart out and stepped on it. It was beautiful and the movie is just the same. Beautifully written and I loved having to read between the lines in this story. I can’t say anything other than it being one of my favorites of this year.

Gay Romance Score: 12/10

Book Score: 10/10

Guilty Pleasures (Club Vampyre):

I really like this version of vampires and Anita is a really relatable character. She’s badass, strong, human (but not whiny) and the story is really fun to read.

Badass Women Score: 12/10, fuck em up buttercup

Book score: 9/10,just because I am salty about there not being enough Jean-Claude for me.

Even When You Lie To Me:

This was a really beautiful book. It may sound like bad fanfiction if you only read the back, but the summary does not do this book justice. It’s a wonderful story of growing up and becoming yourself, learning who you are and learning to stand up for yourself. The main character doesn’t really get described much in the book, something that makes it that much easier to relate to her.

Book Score: 8/10

I have read this book five times this year… Pray for me.

The Sun Is Also A Star:

This book and this author are both amazing. The story has so much diversity and its written in a really cool way, not only showing you the thoughts of the main characters but also the people they interfere with. Realistic but not boring, I cried reading this.(I cry a lot)

Book Score: 9/10

Melon-butt Score: Melon/Melon

Eragon and Eldest:

Read this in English, please. I tried reading it in my own language (Norwegian) and I have never hated anything so much. (Everything sounded so ridiculous) The books are amazing and I love the fact that Eragon is just 15 and is not some super smart or extraordinary person. He makes mistakes and you get to watch him learn and grow as a person. There are so many amazing things about these books that I can’t even tell you. I can’t wait to read on, though they can prove a little difficult to read at times. (takes a while to read them)

Collective Book score: 8/10

Family Drama Score: Drama Llama

Alex Rider: Stormbreaker:

This book is technically intended for children but I thought it was really fun to read and it was a really nice break from reading heavy books.

Score: 7/10

Every Day:

I loved this book so much that i’m afraid to read the sequel because I don’t want it to ruin the story for me. This book doesn’t need a continuation at all.

Score: 9/10

Queen Of Air And Darkness:

Cassandra Clare strikes again and I couldn’t be happier about it. This book blew my mind and my heart to shreds. I was absolutely not expecting the ending that I got and I finished this the same day I bought it because I could not put it down. Throw all your theories out the window because you have no idea about what’s going to happen. I can’t even say anything because I’ll spoil it but this was by far my favorite trilogy in the shadowhunter universe and I need more.

Book score: 10/10

Herondale Score: I’m a hoe/10

“Come to papa.”- Jace Herondale

The Perks of Being a Wallflower:

Really good book, loved the mystery and the characters. Greatly written and I also really enjoyed the movie, even though it leaves out some important details.

Sadness Score: 8/10

Book Score: 8/10 +2 points for Rocky Horror references, -1 point for mentioning The Catcher in the Rye (You’ll understand later)

Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone:

This was the last book i finished this year, but I have one more that I need to save for the bottom of this list because otherwise I’ll explode. (You’ll understand) I loved this from the first page and I am currently reading number two. 

Book Score: 9/10 +1 point for Dumbledore's beard.

Dumbledore’s Beard Score: Beardy Beard/Beard

The Catcher in the Rye:

Let me start off by saying that if this was my book, I would burn it in a dumpster fire. I know it’s considered a classic, but this book is the worst piece of crap I have ever read. The main character is an asshole. (which is fine) A lot of books have asshole characters and I don’t hate them because of that, but this book has nothing else. Holden is hypocritical, boring and has the vocabulary of a three year old (no offence to three year olds, I love you)The writing is repetitive and boring. The plot- what plot? I have never before been this angry at a book. It is useless, does nothing for anyone and there is no meaning to anything written in here. Nothing happens at all and I’m mad that I wasted three days of my life trying to finish this book.

Score: -3000/10

I am so mad.

(Spoiler!) The best part of this book is when the main character gets punched in the face.

“Is it legal to burn library books?”- Me, 2018.

[thesamestarlight]

reading the alex rider series for the first time thanks to things that bleed (@thingsthatbleedfic) and. well. spoilers for point blanc below.

things alex rider and danny fenton have in common:

yo, they were just fourteen

secret identity

DISSECTION?????

[thesamestarlight]

finally reading ark angel and you guys will never believe this but the characters in this spy novel are behaving suspiciously

[thesamestarlight]

ALSO. don’t answer this (/srs), but it’s been two full books now and i’m still confused. what the heck was up with the end of point blanc???? it was SO DRAMATICALLY AMBIGUOUS who walked away from that fight, and at the time, i was like, sure, it’s a cliffhanger to get you to come back. but then there was NO MENTION OF IT EVER AGAIN. i started reading skeleton key, and i kinda thought we’d get some kind of reassurance, from the narrator if nothing else, that that is, in fact, Still Our Guy, and not, you know, a CLONE. but then there was NOTHING? so, like, i guess this really is alex? probably? what happened to the other guy? based on the vibes i’ve been picking up in ttb, i’ve been assuming we’ll circle back around to that at some point, but suddenly those vibes feel A LOT LESS CERTAIN. i don’t think i actually want anyone to tell me one way or another (just in case it does come up later), but it just feels really weird.

[thesamestarlight]

the way british english keeps Fucking Getting Me. im five books into this series finally getting fed up and plugging things like “jersey british” and “british overalls” into google images and going “THAT’S WHAT YOU MEANT?? THIS WHOLE TIME???”