#elfling fankids

[me-myself-and-my-fos]

Bernard is not very happy with me because the girls were watching Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer after I put it on for them while I bake, and they watched the part with ‘why weren’t you at elf practice?!’ and they’ve just been saying that throughout the house for the last few hours and many times it’s directed at him and he’s two seconds away from pulling his hair out

[me-myself-and-my-fos]

Also in the episode they talk about how Scott’s kids born at the pole would have magic and he’s like “my kids don’t have magic”

And I love it because Bernard replies “are you sure about that?”

But he says it in a way that he absolutely learned that from experience

And now I have to think about when the girls develop special elf magic and what exactly the magic is

[me-myself-and-my-fos]

oh gosh I started thinking about the first Christmas Bernard and I have with Autumn 🥺

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Do your fankids ever try to tell their classmates their dad used to be an elf? How do y'all have that talk with them?

Absolutely. We’ve had to talk to all of them at one point or another

Our oldest, Autumn, had it the worst. When she was younger, her school was doing career day and she tried to insist Bernard come in and tell them about his job as head elf at the North Pole. He had to sit her down and tell her that he can’t do that and “people aren’t supposed to know, especially adults.” And she’s so so disappointed. She also gets into a fight with a kid in sixth grade because he said Santa isn’t real

Frankie, our youngest, has the second hardest time. She wants to brag about how cool her dad is!

We do talk to them all though. We tell them that it’s a secret and it’s important not to tell anyone outside of the family because they wouldn’t understand

[me-myself-and-my-fos]

Okay but because Bernard is from the North Pole and is so well adjusted to the cold, I fully believe that he routinely leaves the house without a jacket during the winter. He’s used to temps below freezing so going out for the day in 20 degree weather? It’s like a trip to the beach

The girls try to mimic him as they grow, and at most they can handle 40° but that’s it. So I constantly have to bundle them up in their coats and scarves so they don’t catch colds. And as I’m still putting on my coat Bernard just strolls out of the house in jeans and a long sleeve and I’m lowkey glaring at him as he walks out

[me-myself-and-my-fos]

Thinking about the Christmas traditions Bernard and I make with the girls as they grow up 🥺

[me-myself-and-my-fos]

Also Autumn absolutely got into a fight in 6th grade about whether or not Santa is real

[me-myself-and-my-fos]

Okay but Autumn (age 7 or 8) asking Bernard to go to career day at her school and he suggests me going instead because I’m the baker and he just does the paperwork

And she’s like “no! Tell them about your North Pole job, daddy!”

And he has to explain that he can’t and it’s a secret that he used to be an elf

[me-myself-and-my-fos]

I was thinking about the things the girls inherit from me vs Bernard and just,,, yeah

From me

Autumn: eyesight, eye color, eczema (elbows, inner elbows, knees, back of knees), lactose intolerance, autism

Elsa: hair type, nose, laugh, eczema (scalp), autism, love of bread

Edith: hair color, eczema (back, arms), autism, pumpkin allergy

Frankie: lactose intolerance, love of lemon, sensitive stomach, autism

From Bernard

Autumn: hair color, hair type, nose, sweet tooth, attitude

Elsa: hair color, eye color, sweet tooth, attitude

Edith: hair type, nose, eye color, sweet tooth, tolerance to cold, disappointed face

Frankie: hair color, nose, eye color, sweet tooth, smile

[me-myself-and-my-fos]

Older Elfling fankids!

Autumn Bell

Elsa Bell

Edith Bell

Francine Bell

[me-myself-and-my-fos]

Mine and Bernard’s fankids!!!

Autumn Bell (oldest)

Elsa Bell

Edith Bell

Francine Bell (youngest)

Bonus older versions

[me-myself-and-my-fos]

Autumn, approx. 7 years old: Daddy can I have ice cream?

Bernard: We’re going to be having dinner in an hour. Did you ask mommy?

Autumn: yes

Bernard: and what did she say?

Autumn: she said no

Bernard: Then why did you ask me?

Autumn: Because she’s not the boss of you

Bernard: *internally* it’s a trap it’s a trap it’s a trap it’s a trap

[me-myself-and-my-fos]

Do any of your fankids frequent the doctors when they're little? Like for allergies or anything? Any silly bones broken? Like the classic of breaking a bone cuz they were jumping off the bed or something?

Oh absolutely. I have several

Lisa Palmer, the youngest daughter from my ship with Ray. She’s born with hemophilia (like her uncle Nate) so every time she got hurt as a kid we rushed her to the doctors to make sure she was okay. Usually just ended with her having a bruise for a while but we could never be too careful

Mine and Blaine’s son, Silas, is a pretty rambunctious kid, especially with his Uncle Don E. He’s gotten broken bones or sprains quite a bit in his lifetime. Luckily no stitches were needed (yet)

Mine and Sam’s youngest daughter, Penny, was born with a hole in her heart so she has to go to the doctors a lot to make sure everything is fine. But also she and her sister have lots of seasonal allergies and get sinus infections a lot as kids

All of mine and Bernard’s daughters at some point in time. It’s mostly a dermatologist because they all inherit eczema from me and we make sure they see a dermatologist to help keep it in check

Also every single one of mine and Joey’s kids. I mean it’s 5 boys and a girl, the boys roughhouse all the time with each other and friends, and then their sister grows up learning how to be tough and fight because of them. So all of the kids have gotten hurt on multiple occasions and it always warrants a doctor’s visit

[me-myself-and-my-fos]

Okay but us starting a tradition with the girls of making gingerbread houses and it ends with them eating the gingerbread houses for breakfast on Christmas Day

[me-myself-and-my-fos]

Minor change to the elfling fankids:

I changed the last name from Blake to Bell because I headcanon that to fit in with humans Bernard took a last name but took the most Christmas related one that didn’t sound ridiculous and that ended up being Bell

And I decided that instead of us all having Blake as the last name it’s now Bell

[me-myself-and-my-fos]

Bernard calls me into the living room one afternoon because “the food network is broken!”

I look to see what the problem is and the girls have decided to mess with him by putting parental locks on the tv and it times out the tv after so long. The girls are upstairs snickering and giggling and I have to get them to remove the parental lock so he can watch his cooking shows

still so obsessed with the idea of Bernard being technologically inept and just not really caring all that much

Like he has an old blackberry that he uses to make phone calls and rarely ever texts from. He can type on a computer super well but don’t ask him to download any files because he won’t know how. He has an iPod the girls got him for Christmas because they’re sick of listening to his records in the house. He knows how to used the music app and that’s it. Constantly has to ask us how to buy more songs. Doesn’t really like streaming on tv. He’s fine with his hallmark channel, food network, and local news stations. Cannot connect bluetooth devices to save his life