#elems totally deep thoughts

[starryelem]

Hello welcome to how Ink slowly started to express himself better by yours truly who can’t sleep at 2 am

Ink is a person who thinks he’s very logical, that whatever he does or reacts on makes sense and he isn’t wrong, matter of the fact he’s very right and he’s the one of the most logical people in the JR (considering how he was raised to be a weapon and wasn’t raised on morals but instead on logic)

The first couple of weeks at the JR were like a blur to him, he was busy getting used to the things and when he saw people frustrated sad or anything he ignored them simply because it had nothing to do with his job.

Then he had a talk with Dream, a very long and very back and forth talk (that wasn’t disrespectful in any way). Dream explained Ink had to be more sympathetic, Ink asked him why, Dream began to list of reasons and Ink told him it wasn’t stated in his job description and after failed attempts, Dream dismissed him.

That discussion was forgotten by him until he had to visit the “ER” part of the medical wing due to a headache he had ignored because he didn’t want to get into a mess by handing in a paperwork late. There he saw just how many people seemed to be drowning in the blues and out of nothing but pure boredom he asked a nurse why a lady was sobbing her eyes out and once he was told it was because her child was in an accident he replied with “But even if her child dies, that’s the cycle of life, the earth won’t stop spinning.” But instead of a “you’re right” or anything close to that, he was met with a look of disgust and pure discomfort that would follow him no matter what hall he walked through from that day on.

{If you couldn’t guess by now, ignoring people’s emotions made him disliked but now that, that made him hated. No one will deny that Ink gets the job done but if you asked about his personality, people might be able to curse him out from A to Z in minutes as if they had practiced.}

Ink, of course, realized how nobody was actually listening to him when he wanted them to do something but that’s when he started to watch others, in his mind it made no sense to be ignored, if these people had an issue, they should tell it to him. While on a mission with Finch, he noticed how the people around Finch, willingly listened and understood him which confused Ink because a couple of minutes ago he said the same thing and no one cared but once he observed Finch, he noticed what Finch was doing; he was sympathetic towards the others which caused him to remember Dream’s talk with him.

It took Ink many tries and so much eavesdropping to be able to go from “it’s annoying” to something way more detailed like “it’s loud”. To many it may seem like not that big of a change but Ink would say “it’s annoying” expecting instant observance understanding on why it’s annoying,

Something note worthy is that Ink knows he doesn’t think like others, the meds he has to take basically scream it in his face. He doesn’t exactly feel like he’s broken or he’s lacking but everyone around him talks about being the real them which makes him wonder if his real self is not around when he takes medicine since it changers his behavior which is why he sometimes ignores taking them.

[benefits1986]

Jedi Master Level Of Happiness & Flowcharts

Millennials like me are battling a silent pandemic called unhappiness. Skip my thought farts but, please, please give the video a shot.  For the record, I tried watching Star Wars in elem days and even high school and college and after college, pero, ‘di ko pa rin ma-dig totally. OK naman siya. Maganda naman storylines and all, pero ang haba masyado. Sorry na. LOL. Pero dahil some really good friends dig it, I shall revisit this one of these days. OK ‘yung ibang recent releases din. Please don’t fight me. :D Try ko one more time. Gets ko rin ‘yung struggles ng mga characters which is spot on. Also, gusto kong Halloween costume ‘yung Darth Vader na rainbow ‘yung lalayan kaso I don’t like parties. 

Plus, I enjoy the May The Fourth Be With Day na merong lightsaber duels. Sleek and my vibe. LOL. Gusto kong wasakin ‘yung lightsaber pero syempre, sa good friend ko ‘yun so, tamang hampas lang ako nung I was given my turn to try it out. Saka this good friend really knows me kaya pinigilan niya ako kasi limited drop lang yata ‘yung lightsaber niya. LERKZ. Nag-sorry naman ako tapos smiled. Pinatawad naman niya ako tapos pinaupo na lang niya ako sa gedli.  ----- Had too many plans for the long weekend, but have to stay home to look after Vidi closely. He’s under anti-anxiety meds, ear meds, meds for his big ass wound and we’d be back next week to check his mass. He’s either a ticking time bomb or major papansin kasi affected talaga siya sa arrival and presence ni KD, my youngest. Hassle talaga household na puro alpha dogs pero ginusto ko ‘to. Super bait naman nila 3 pero talagang alpha male x 3 is always a struggle din kasi lahat sila papansin and clingy. So, yep, life happens. Doc assured me that I can stop overthinking for now, and may be, for good. LOL. Indeed, Vidi is one of my therapy dog and he levels it up this 2023.  When he arrived, he looked at me with his RBF look, male edition. I asked him how he is and he dismissed me, yet again. So far, we’re good, but, let’s see what happens next week and the weeks after the next.  Still unsure about bike skin versus bathroom tape for MatchME but that can wait. Might ride this weekend without ANY sort of protection for MatchME’s pristine frame because she’s all mine after all. Laspagan na this. Char. Pero, pabebe rides lang din naman, so, bahala na. Still hugging her since she’s still boxed up. Dad told me that I should start creating short videos; and should call my followers KA-THICCS. Kaloka, mhie. Naging alipin na talaga siya ng YT and FB vids. He’s also egging me to let him ride MatchME but, wait. He’s lambasting me because he shared he saw one really tall and big biker riding the B. (Sabi pala nung kausap kong taga-South na una kong nakitaan ng Brompton nung 2015, B daw tawag sa Brompton. Damn. Another learning. I like because I like the letter B. So me.) If malapit lang Diliman, I’d really go, but again, I have to stay home with Vidi. Dad is on a tiny trip and he told me that he can let it go since landian trip lang din naman daw ‘yun. Told him that I’d be on long leave after Labor Day and that he deserves some time off the shit hole. LOL. He’s been eating a whole lot the past weeks in between oversleeping --signs of depression or grief. Pero ‘di pa ako nagpupunta sa talk na ‘to with him kasi as a boomer, syempre, hinay-hinay lang. It will come. Diyan muna siya and he needs to also come to terms with his emotions at his own pace and time. Been more lambing (UGH) kahit sungit pa rin ako AF sa kanya kasi I can see deep sadness especially as mother dragon’s birthday is coming up. Ulit-ulit siya na wala na nga siyang asawa, wala pa siyang nanay, so wala na talaga. Finished na. Me: O tapos? Iyak ka?  Side note: Would really need to mandate biking trips with Dad para mabawasan ang chances of spiral niya without him knowing it. Kawawa na naman tuhod ko neto. LOL. Saka baka need ko na gumising ng mas maaga lalo para Tumblr before sunrise tapos onting bike before work from home. Then weekends na puwede kaming sumundot kahit hanggang Binondo or Intra or Westgate or Evia or Manila Mem lang. Gah. So, I need to get back to my sleeping cycle ASAP na ayon sa mga ganaps sa BGC+++. Kakapadog ngayon pa lang pero, let’s do this.  ----  Steven Bartlett is one my recent crushes because of his Dragon Den’s stint. Akala mo alam lahat e pero, seriously, he is a force. Cutie pa. Tapos, I think, he bikes to work or basta, bike. Not sure lang. LOL. Nakakaasar lang talaga at times lalo nung nagse-spread ng hate sa ex niya tapos I think, nagkabalikan yata sila or something. I dont’ follow him naman like a KPop stan but his podcast is really spot on. Very targeted. Yabang pa niya nung wala pa siyang followers. ‘Wag daw i-share ‘yung content niya. LUL. Clickbait na bet. :D Very early adopters and misfits gaming.  I watched this podcast previously but back then, I was laughing sarcastically all throughout. I also agree that happiness is a choice but, I have no other choice then, but to feel shitty or shittier. However, what I learned is that you really have to lower your expectation and mind your own timeline. Must also be because, a year ago, I’ve been in a really, really crazy shit place that I’d want to turn upside down. I was also able to revisit the mindset mother dragon etched in me: CHOOSE TO BE THANKFUL even when things turn bad or go worse. Opak. When she died, I thought this mentality would decompose with her body. I was in disbelief because throughout her life until her the time she’s nearing death, she is thankful for every little win and is gracious in all her defeats. Ganun siya. Ang OG unbothered person pero syempre, she had so many bad days to the point that her self-loathing and self-pity episodes are like unicorns farting rainbows --almost non-existent pero ‘pag dumating, wagas. During those times, I would watch her intently and try my best to hold back my emotions kasi minsan lang talaga siya magpakawala ng emotions na malala. I guess, looking back, I am her safest place. She is rarely an open book and she may have a pretty big circle but she handpicks those she’ll let in. A year or so ago, a spark to turning the crazy shit bits and pieces of my life upside down officially started. Bit by bit, with the help of my people, I’ve managed to make amends like: just do it and know what really, really matters. Things will eventually come around and maybe, turn upside down. :) Not been easy but it’s worthwhile. I’ve started looking beyond my daily grind, my old life where I’d go all out on work but forget that there’s life after clocking out. Don’t get me wrong. I didn’t quietly quit. I simply accepted that validation should come from within. And, just like what mother dragon said: At the end of each day, choose to be thankful. Know what matters most so all the rest are but noises. (GAH. Taurus szn 2023, you are poppin’ so far.)  And last night, this video featuring Bossing Mo popped up after a series of random vlogs. Weird. Pretty accurate and I guess, I needed this rewatch. I dozed off and had a pretty good sleep which I’ve not been getting since V died talaga. I also need to find a distraction outside work kasi ayokong maging workaholic na naman na not about the level up or the merits, but the escape na non-stop, paid pa. LOL. Kung meron lang WA (workaholics anonymous), sumali na ako noon pa. 

So far, sabi naman sa standing ko, decent naman ang ganaps ko. May resibo pa. HAHAHA. Kaya ‘wag ako, mhie. ‘Wag ako. Hindi masamang magkaroon ng life after deadlines. This is a reminder and a warning to myself especially in the coming weeks. LELS. Let��s just let things happen because I’m so pumped talaga. I just can’t explain it but I thrive in disproving assumptions and judgements, in general. Wala lang. Gusto ko lang. Happy high ko. My craving. Ganun lang talaga.  Check ko nga books neto. ‘Yung printed.  Tuwa pa ako sa balls niya to debunk the whole I THINK THEREFORE I AM with matching name para sa brain niya. Gusto mo ‘yun? So normal naman pala ako since I have this notion that the brain has its own world and ikaw pa rin ang magde-decide kung anong gagawin mo. Binibigyan ka lang ng feedback ng brain, hypothalamus pati lahat ng organs and cells mo. LOL. ‘Yan kasi, kakaseryoso sa biology class experiment about tossing genes in the air (papers na may DNA) to see how Charles Mendel’s genetic emerut unfolds. Saka kakanood ng mga dystopian shit like Fringe and pre-dystopian shit like Chernobyl. UGH.  Side Note: Ewan ko ba pero isang reason why gusto kong mag-Europa is because I want to visit concentration camps. The first time I watched videos about how the victims of the Nazi galawan, syempre, hogwashing naman din talaga ‘yung slant pero, beyond that, may stories na alam mong there is something so magical in choosing to be happy, to be thankful kahit anong lagay mo sa buhay na ‘to. Hopefully, ‘pag natupad ‘yun, sana makakausap ako ng mga tao na legit na survivors ng panahon ni Hitler.  -----

May feeling akong gustong gawing pet project netong si Bossing Mo ang anak niya as an art and science sa AI. Na-curate niyang mabuti ang bawat nooks and crooks ng life chapter niya sa anak niya e. Saka he seems really at it. LOL. Nag-AI pa si Bossing so, good luck with that talaga. Sundot na may kurot really brings home the bacon in the same manner that it breaks legs (as in basag-tuhod) and eggs (b*yag choke) din. :D Muntik na rin pala ‘tong naging Cancer e pero very Gemini din naman siya, in fairness --may split personality. LOL. Reminds me a lot of my second dad who is my first mentor pero Kotler x Godin naman ang baon.  Kung gawain man niya ‘to, sana all. Hassle talaga kasi almost wala siyang digital footprints. Nasa head ko lang siya. Her flat voice. Her beady eyes. Her small frame but so firm and intimidating. Her upbeat pace. Her demeanor. Her sumisigaw na confidence and assurance. Her unbothered aura. Missing her a little extra talaga PERO this time, I am really, really able to revisit our memories with a sweet vibe na. :D  Metallica pala gusto netong si Bossing Mo e. LOL. Tapos may mention pa siya ng dopamine in the light of AI. Baka matupad ‘yung dream kong maging mutant before 45 or ‘pag sinuwerte, 50.  Saka talagang sinagad niya ‘yung pag-tap ‘di umano sa kanyang feminine side. Aminado siya sa hypermasculinity. ULOL. Hahahaha. Tigilan mo ako. Pero, sige, itawid mo ‘yan, Bossing. ‘Pag ‘di ka na super hayok sa pet project mo saka ‘pag mas may time ka na sa pamilya mo lalo ‘pag nagpapansin sa’yo daughter mo, sasaluduhan kita diyan. Ingat! :D  Sagutin natin tanong sa kanya ni Steven Bartlett for that day’s video from Jacquelin Gold: WHAT ARE THE FAILURES YOU CHERISH THE MOST?  The failure I cherish the most is allowing myself to be in the shit hole when mom died. It’s been a series of running away when I thought I’ve been moving forward. Back then, I felt so empty. I felt I was nothing. Looking back, I needed to be in that spot because I needed to restart and recalibrate. I am learning that there’s nothing wrong about allowing emotions to come, in the same manner that I should also allow to let these emotions go. If it weren’t for that shit hole era, I would be more delusional about basing my validation, my affirmation with that of my mom and her super high standards. I’ve chosen to keep her as long as I could not only because I love her, but I was so afraid of losing her thinking that I’d lose me and lose us, too. OPAK. There you go, bitch. Nasabi ko na rin after a decade of not naming this. Back then, I feel so unsure, uncertain of what would be left of me if I’m not with mom. I felt that all I am and all I am not is because of her and only her. Though she keeps telling me that I’ve finally been able to be my own person, I never believed that. I guess, it comes with age and being able to hear stories from people I come across with, too. I guess, the past years, I am able to be kinder to myself. I’ve been moving beyond my self-inflicted shackles because losing my mom is a blessing after its cursed chapters. It’s a blessing because I was able to test how far I can without her and without her approval which I was living for then. It’s a blessing because I know she tried her best to stay even if it meant being in such inconvenience.  Today, I just realized that the spot where I’m putting this eme together is the spot where her bed at our tiny house is. Gah. And I am feeling her love and life lessons come together, right now, over me, all over me. Thinking of listening to her favorite The Beatles PL via vinyls. Been avoiding this staple sedative and upper PL the past months because it is usually my trigger. Actually, it’s weird because when mom was alive and kicking, The Beatles is on repeat whenever I’m not home especially when I’m downing really crucial matters at work or outside work.  The past years, I also am happy and surprised to share na I’ve been basing my happiness in things that matter to me. All the rest don’t matter na. I may not have much but I have what I need and want: a decent health record, a few really, really good friends who are more than family to me, my 3 boys, a renewed relationship with my dad, recovering my closeness with my one and only brother, a strong connection with family members and extended family members, being able to deal with the loss of my mom + forgiving myself for skipping all stages of grief, a 99.9% non-toxic workspace + people at work who I call my “angel-demons” which is soooo weird in a corp set up, and just a few days ago, a junior sent me a short message: YOUR FORCE IS ALWAYS HELPFUL na tinawanan ko lang pero my heart is swelling with glee na ‘di ko ma-explain, mhie (Hindi ako fan ng office politics and limelight talaga. I abhor office gossips din tbh. I live forda bills lang talaga plus kahit makapag-help make better ng mga people I collab with, goods na goods na ako pero masungit saka maldita pa rin ako.), the ability to travel and do things for the first time that is beyond the “recommended” stuff and fluff, MatchME (my dream since 2015), my tiny house na in blue & white near Tags (which I didn’t plan at all talaga), my tiny vertical garden, my dream bag I got in Osaka (Eto, hindi ko naman alam na designer pala siya kasi 17 years old pa ako noon kaya ‘di siya luxury buy talaga. Tapos ngayon, laspag na rin siya. Ergo, Charles and Keith na lang ulit talaga kasi ambigat ko talagang mag-bag), and most importantly, being kinder to myself which I didn’t know na kaya ko pala talaga. Kulang na lang talaga ‘yung pick up + driving skills be mine like my Tito Taurus’ vibin’ pero sige, reconsider ko non-pick up na bagay sa kapunggukan ko. LOL. Super last na, Vespa Picnic. ‘Yun lang.  Next stop: Greene Meets Brown happening tomorrow.  Caveat: Sa ngalan ng pag-veer away from cancel cult, I didn’t look up Bossing Mo. Tigil-tigil na sa the content and the creator are one. Walang ganun except when it comes to really important life matters. Saints are sinners, too. Also, your prayers are your sins, too. LELS. 

[theloniousbach]

BACK TO FUR PEACE RANCH: ACOUSTIC HOT TUNA with Larry Campbell, 5 NOVEMBER 2022

My best laid plans last night were to catch a real time set from Small’s Live by a piano trio led by Kevin Hays who deserves attention, though I sometimes find him a bit too clever for my own good. My jazz listening/writing is the one thing that hasn’t resettled since my sentimental journeys to Santa Fe and Pittsburgh. On the Monday in Santa Fe, I took advantage of the time zone shift to catch Miki Yamanka’s late set in real time and came in the middle of Alan Broadbent (not with Harvie S) before it. Those haven’t made it into one of these souvenirs, so seeing Hays would have allowed a cadenza about them. But I saw no more jazz out west and just the Lew Tabackin and Jeremy Pelt shows over this past week.

Instead there has been the Caffe Lena trad/folk excursion with Bruce Molsky and Beppe Gambetta (so I haven’t suffered). Though I had missed the social media announcement of this show, there it was. We jumped in for the last 45 minutes of the second set, about a third of the total, just as Larry Campbell embarked on Deep Elem Blues.

Having not immediately deleted an announcement that Acoustic Hot Tuna will be in Steelville in about three weeks. It’s a legendary intimate destination venue a couple of hours southeast of St Louis. With housing, it’s north of $200 each. So, no, but reluctantly. But that put this personally important band on my mind yet again.

Looking at the setlist, I regret missing Good Shepherd and That’ll Never Happen No More because I take a stab at as well as several rarities (True Religion, Keep On Truckin’, Highway Song (David Crosby sang on the original and he came up as they tuned into open G for the Water Song encore. In any case he was alive at the time), and Ode for Billy Dean. Campbell sung Police Dog Blues and Big River Blues which would have been fun.

What we did see was a healthy dose of Reverend Gary Davis. Not Candyman which opened the second set, but Hesitation Blues!! (Campbell on fiddle), Death Don’t Have No Mercy!!!!! (Jorma said, “We’ve been too cheerful.” Perhaps. I like playing it in my way as solace as I think of my coming losses.), and Let Us Get Together Right Down Here as the set closer. Between them, Jorma and Campbell are where I have learned most about the Reverend.

There were a couple of Jorma songs which I identified via the set lists, not by my own recognition. They have glorious chords and thoughtful lyrics (swallowed up again as Jorma’s voice has regressed to mean from the Quarantine Concert days and being off the road highpoint), but one camera angle put Jack Casady right in front. As I find my own way around my young singer-songwriter friend’s chord progressions and thereby figure out some things about the bass, I saw so much more about what he accomplishes sometimes with a quarter or even half note. He got a couple of flat out solos on Deep Elem Blues and Let Us Get Together Right Down Here.

Larry Campbell has quite the pedigree, doesn’t he? Music director for Bob Dylan and then the Levon Helm Rambles; a stint with Phil Lesh and Friends; and this longstanding friendship. Between those four gigs, he touches on keeping alive key parts of the music of my youth.

That said, I’m not sure he quite fit last/that night. I don’t blame him though. While Jorma doesn’t retain his QC voice, his guitar playing remains even more ornate from those months of being able to really practice. He takes up more space, so where to fit in?

I’m not going to return to the whole show in its entirety (but okay, Police Dog, Shepherd, No More, and Candy Man maybe) so as not to endure ads etc. BUT I’m very glad to have followed my nose about this show and I got a writing prompt out of it.

Jazz returns. I’ll catch that Kevin Hays set in the Small’s Archive in a week or so and I have a Smoke show pass already bought for this afternoon.

But Hot Tuna has also had a huge impact of the epigenetics of my musical DNA.

[nin-jay-go]

@x-catspace-x

heard your req about a swap au loud and clear >:3 maybe it was a mistake to give the au fiend More AUs to play with but i totally haven't been thinking about this nonstop recently (im lying. ive been thinking about this nonstop)

more details about the swap au under the cut if anyone's curious :0

in case it wasn't clear from the image, the swaps are as follows

kai - skylor

jay - unagami

cole - morro

zane - cryptor

lloyd - harumi

nya - kalmaar

with bonus swaps of

wu - garmadon

pixal - mr e / echo (still haven't decided if i want mr e to be echo here)

since everything's all swapped around, it means that harumi is the daughter of wu (hehe haWUmi), and wu is the lord of darkness and master of destruction. misako stays where she is bc i couldn't think of anyone to swap her with gfkjdhfgkjh (and btw she has glasses bc i hc her to be albino and albino ppl tend to have poor vision, so i thought it'd be cute :) since i used to hc lloyd with glasses at some point i thought it would fit)

skylor's mom died recently, and she's been trying not to think about it by drowning herself in work at the noodle shop, where her dad chen is trying to get her to lighten up and not work so hard. she gets approached by garmadon to train with her mother's fire and she accepts. chen is a wonderful dad and i LOVE HIM

unagami (prefers gami) is a Gamer™️ and has two whole dads (milton dyer and okino). despite being tiny, permanently babyfaced, and a Gamer, he talks very politely and uses a lot of big words. okino raised him like that :) scott is the previous elem of lightning but i haven't decided where he is in the story yet, but i want him to be gami's uncle. also gami is a vtuber

morro was found as a kid rooting through garmadons trash, so ofc garm went "hm. i want this rat as my child" and adopts them dkjfghdfjh they got their earth power from their parent, who is still unknown to everyone. they're still just as emo bc they have an excuse to wear black at all times jdkfghkjdfg (morro also gets kai's jealousy arc and realization that the green ninja is to be protected, so they end up taking kai's role as the green ninja's older sibling, in this case rumi)

cryptor was built by cyrus borg in this au, but still deep in the forest where no one could find them. he was originally built to assist borg with household things but he started to see cryptor as his son as his ai developed. borg got kidnapped at some point, so cryptor is trying to find him. unknown if cry knows about being a nindroid at first or not, but he's prone to short circuiting due to how snappy he gets.

and kalmaar (sometimes called kali or mar depending on their mood) is the water ninja now! bc i thought it'd be absolutely hilarious to put this purple bitch boy in a hero's role dfkjghkjdhfg he got exiled from merlopia after his father and (adopted) brother disagreed with his human-loving notions, and decided that weakness wasn't tolerated. and because of Magic i guess, kalmaar is able to shift from his squid form to a more lego head-esque form (aka i did not want to draw a squid head. good lird). also i made him genderfluid bc i can

any more questions are welcome :) my ask box is open!

[megareviews]

Octopath Traveler Combat Review

Hello whoever’s reading this, I’m here to talk about Octopath Traveler’s combat system, and how it sucks. Now you might be wondering, why am I writing about this now, isn’t that game kind of old at this point? Yes, it is, but I only “finished” playing recently since I was working off of a borrowed copy and it’s more the level of disappointment I felt while playing it has stuck with me much more than many other games I’ve played. Since I want to go into game design and development, I thought that it would be good practice to do a deep dive on game mechanics, and it’s easier to write about something that I have strong feelings about to start with. While I have many issues with Octopath, the combat system is what the player is dealing with the most (which in itself is an issue), so the fact that it was lackluster dropped the enjoyability of the game more than if it were better balanced with story and exploration. I’ll try to hit everything that I had a gripe with, from minor things I personally would want changed, to what I view as major flaws that lower the enjoyment for everyone. I will be talking about the post-game boss, because a lot of my issues come into focus during it, so spoiler warning.

For reference, I’ll be talking about the game the way I played it, so I’ll give my main character loadouts in relation to the final boss. Team 1: Hunter Therion, Cleric Alfyn, Sorceror Cyrus, and Thief Olberic; Team 2: Warlord H’annit, Scholar Ophelia, Apothecary Primrose, and Runelord Tressa.

Now the big overarching problem with this game is its simplicity. Making a game simple can be a good thing, and definitely makes it more accessible, but there are a plethora of sub issues that I will be going into throughout this caused by how oversimplified many systems are in this game. For starters there is the lack of skill diversity, as in, there just isn’t very much that characters and enemies do over the course of the game. The offensive skills have 12 possible damage types, 6 weapons (Phys) and 6 elemental (Elem) and there’s only really 4 different ways these are implemented: single hit, multi hit, wide (hits all enemies) hit, and wide multi hit. Multi hits are generally just better due to the break system and damage limits, and wide hits are better the more enemies there are. Those of you good with numbers might have already multiplied those to get 48 ways of hitting an enemy, and I’ll add two, since the Merchant has an single hit untyped skill and the Starseer has a wide untyped skill, for a grand total of 50 that I can remember. Looking at that number I actually don’t know if that looks like a lot for somebody who hasn’t played the game, but the damage types only really matter in the break mechanic of the game and which stat is used for calculating damage. No particular type of damage is better for damage or accuracy skill wise, and the elem skills will do the exact same thing no matter which element is used since they’re only based on the user’s Mag stat. Phys attacks are a bit different since each one is affected by the weapon the user has equipped for that type, but they’re generally all +Str and then +Mag / +Acc / +Crit / +Spd / +Eva. Some Phys skills also have side effects that help differentiate between them, but the basic attacks are the same when the weapons are similar.

Since I brought it up, let’s talk about the two main mechanics of combat that this game has, the break and boost systems. Overall, these systems are pretty good on their own, and most of my issues are rather small here. First up is the break system: hit the opponent with their weaknesses a number of times, and they lose any remaining moves they have this turn, any they would take on the next turn, and all attacks against them deal more damage, though on the turn after the next, they are guaranteed to move first. This is where most of the fun of the game is, figuring out the enemy’s weaknesses, as they are hidden when you first encounter an enemy, only revealed when the weakness is hit, or with the Analyze skill, and then timing the breaks to be the most beneficial to your team. Many enemies belonged to groups with similar weaknesses, so it’s interesting to learn like winged creatures are generally weak to wind and / or spear attacks. The main problem I have with the break system is that once an enemy is broken, all damage types have the same effectiveness. Before being broken, an enemy that is weak to fire will take extra damage than if it’s hit with an ice attack, but while broken these attacks will do the same damage. Any accuracy bonuses don’t matter, since you can’t miss an attack on a broken enemy and speed bonuses only really matter if the order in which skills are cast is important, which there are some cases, usually with buffing allies. Then a bit smaller is how the weakness bar is always ordered, so some damage types are more useful to figure out all of the weaknesses. For example, if a weakness to staves is the leftmost weakness to be found, the player knows that there are no other physical weaknesses and to just start trying elemental ones. There were also some interesting extra mechanics that were only used a few times, such as shuffling weaknesses after a break, or, one mechanic used exactly once in phase 1 of the final boss, rotating through weaknesses when being attacked.

Then we get to the boost system, which complements the break system very well, with only minor annoyances. It makes the player decide between spending power against an unbroken opponent to break them faster, save up to deal massive damage to an opponent once they break, or how frequently turns need to be spent to cast buffs or debuffs. One issue that I have here is that magic users get the short end of the stick again, as basic attacks are the only moves (besides Bewildering Dance, the RNG move) that boosting will cause more instances of the move to occur. Boosting three times on somebody that will basic attack an enemy can cause them to lose 4 shields, while doing the same on a fire skill will just cause it to do more damage, which is objectively better to do when the enemy is broken. This usually isn’t an issue, as the BP can be spent on status effects and healing which will always be helpful, so besides Cyrus (laugh at him, he’s a nerd) there’s always something to spend BP on, thought your personal playstyle might dictate otherwise. Something that’s more personally annoying is how the limit is 5 BP max per character, since the most you can use is 3 per turn. What would be really nice and satisfying would be to break an opponent, have everybody spend 3 BP for full boosted whatever on the break turn, and then have everybody spend another 3 BP on fully boosted whatever else on the second break turn.

Next is another facet of the simple problem, is that there is significantly less character variability than the game wants you to think, and that’s not much in the first place. There are only 96 total skills for player characters, as there are 12 jobs with 8 skills each, and each character has their default job and may also equip a secondary job, letting each character go into battle with 16 skills, ignoring the path actions that grant others conditionally. The 8 base jobs can be simplified into 2 categories, DPS and Utility, 3 if you want to split the utilities into physical and elemental which I see as reasonable, or if you want to stretch it and split the 2 DPSs in the same way. I’ll stick with 3 since I can show how to best simplify them this way, watch. DPS: multiple damage type skills; Phys Utility: one weapon type set of skills, one single target elem skill, and a couple (de)buffs; Elem Utility: a single target elem skill, a wide elem skill, and a bunch of buffs. The advanced classes are even simpler, three of them being every attack type in either weapons or elements and then the remaining one being a bunch of buffs with one multi element skill so that every element had 5 related skills. I’m debating going into each individual job, but there are two that I will be getting into later for sure, Thief and Starseer, for opposite reasons.

Related to the lack of damage types and skills, is a lack of feeling of progression throughout the game. You gain access to 66% of the skills you will ever have by the end of the first quarter of the game, and the last 33% you won’t get until about the last quarter of the game. While the beginning of the a game it makes sense to give the players a bunch of tools rapidly, especially given the whole theme of versatility of the 8 different starting characters the game is based around, skills just scale up with the player’s stats, given through levels and equipment, otherwise they stay the same. While the middle half of the game can be used to mix and match secondary jobs on characters, it’s all just variations on the familiar. While this lack of progression just makes the game a bit boring until you start finding the advanced jobs, the actual issue is how SP scales through the game. The game ends up getting significantly easier as you progress further into the game since the SP costs become a smaller percentage of each character’s SP pools, and most forms of SP regeneration are percentage based, so characters get back SP easier too. For example, I had Ophelia with Second Wind (which I will get to in detail later) and a bunch of SP equipment, which by mid-game meant she could cast most spells and heal back more SP than they cost, and late-game everything was free outside of revive, which took two turns to fully heal. This is contrast to the beginning of the game, where a single skill cast could deplete a character’s entire SP pool, especially the physical jobs, as they usually came with smaller SP pools in the first place.

But where the runaway scaling is the worst, is actually on the thief job. Thief is a physical utility class, so it comes with dagger skills, the mandatory single hit fire skill, phys str and def debuffs, and some slightly more interesting abilities that falloff as the game goes on and you don’t need items or SP as much. All three dagger skills have special qualities, the divine skill uses the characters spd in the damage calculation, but HP Thief and Steal SP are the really broken ones. They both function the same way, hit twice with the dagger, then recover some percentage of the damage dealt to the stat in the name, 50% to HP or 5% to SP. The cost is also the same for each, 6 SP. There seemed to be a bit of a decrease in accuracy for each compared to just basic attacking with a dagger, so early on it was a bit of a risk to use it on enemies, especially if they were unbroken and not weak to daggers, as you would be losing SP to gain 30 health, or getting two dagger hits without boosting. But then, once the total damage of both hits reached 120, or even if you wanted to be safer, the damage of either hit, you start having a move that is free to use and hits more times than a basic attack without using BP, while also being able to heal yourself in a pinch. Now, the max damage you can deal in one hit without the Surpassing Power is 9,999, and you can very clearly see that a thief becomes an invincible slaughterer, as one can either heal themself for 9,999 HP, which is the max, or 999 SP, which is also the max, per turn. Now this might take a bit of set up, such as decreasing the enemy’s physical defense, which I remember mentioning is an ability that the thief job has, or increasing the thief’s physical strength, and there are a few ways to do that, but what I’m saying is it’s pretty much just all lined up for you to do way too easily with next to no drawbacks.

I’ve mentioned two support skills by now, so I should probably talk about them and the issues that they have. There’s 4 for every job, so 48 total, and each character has 4 slots that they can have support skills assigned to with no job related restrictions. This theoretically is about 200000 combinations, but since many support skills don’t synergize well with either the other ones or with the character or just are worse than others, there’s actually a lot less. The first way the options are culled are through support skills that are basically required. First on that list of required ones is that everybody needs Saving Grace, full stop. It changes the equipped character’s max HP from what is listed to 9,999, though if their HP is above their listed max, they can’t be healed any further until they have returned to a normal HP level. This gets very important for many late game bosses, and I feel like every paragraph is opening another two or more topics to go to, as most character’s 2k~3k isn’t enough. After that is some form of SP assistance, as the support skills are the ones with all the fancy %SP recovery. There’s 4 options to choose from: % max heal, heal % basic attack damage done, halve all SP costs, and heal % damage taken. Your magic casters will generally get the % max heal, since they have large mana pools to take advantage of that, and your DPSs will have the basic damage one, with much smaller mana pools and higher physical attack damage. Anyone with the Thief class can skip this, since as I’ve said, they will never run out of mana anyways. The % damage taken isn’t particularly useful as it’s such a small percentage and much less reliable than the others given it’s based on the enemy’s actions and targeting rather than yours. The Halve SP costs skill is situational, as some classes have higher SP costs, but losing the ability to actually regenerate SP makes the longer (and usually harder) fights more dangerous as you still run the risk of running out of mana. I used it on Tressa, since I played her as a caster and her mana pool is a bit lower than the other main casters, plus her Rest ability allows her to regain SP on her own. Third is either of the stat buff skills, once again the choice is based on how the character will be dealing damage. There’s Physical Prowess for Phys attack and defense or Elemental Edge for Elem attack and defense, and instead of being a stat boost like other similar skills from base jobs is that they permanently grant the combat buff to those stats, which means you don’t need to spend time casting the skills that do that AND that they can’t be dispelled by the enemy. What you do with the last slot (or two for thieves) is more open and is going to be where you can have ideas about different builds.

For me though, that last slot went to Surpassing Power on most characters, because by late game, most of my characters were hitting the damage limit pretty easily. Now the damage limit is just the fact that no single attack can deal more than 9,999 damage, because the developers said so. The support skill Surpassing Power, similar to Saving Grace, ignores that, and instead makes the max 99,999, though have fun trying to reach that before your character’s stats max out. Octopath unfortunately has a lot of these kind of arbitrary limits which only seem to exist to highlight an ability that can get around it, like purple treasure chests and Therion’s job ability. By the time I got to the post game boss 5 of my characters were consistently hitting the damage limit, and due to the sometimes absurd amounts of health that opponents had, Surpassing Power just made most of those fights so much faster.

Now a bit of time talking about enemies, because the difficulty scaling of the game is pretty boring, once again due to how simple the game is. This is really an issue among a lot of this type of RPG, since the game is just a numbers game and bigger numbers = harder fights. There’s two points specifically that make Octopath particularly bad with this, the lack of weaknesses on player characters, and enemy health. Since the player characters don’t have any weaknesses like enemies do, you really don’t have to pay attention to what specifically the opponent is doing, at most you can pay attention to whether you are taking physical or elemental damage, but the types are completely irrelevant. There’s a slight exception since there are accessories that reduce specific types of elemental damage, but as far as I could tell it was just better to use accessories that gave stat bonuses. Some enemies had abilities that could inflict status ailments, or had secondary abilities similar to player skills, but they were so few and far between that once again it doesn’t really contribute much. The other issue is with enemy’s health, in that they generally have way too much and causes the game to become so much slower. Fighting basic enemies is almost never a danger to your team assuming you are properly equipped, but the fights can still drag on for 5~10 minutes just whittling down their health. This even applies to fighting enemies that are much lower level than your own team, mostly due to the defensive bonuses that an enemy that hasn’t been broken has. This culminates to a final boss with about 700,000 HP, ignoring all the summons that it has and that it can’t take damage while the summons exist. Again remember that the maximum damage per hit is 9,999 in most cases and 99,999 in the other (which I’ve never gotten close to even with max offensive stats). Then also add in that you probably won’t be anywhere near that first max damage unless the boss is broken too, and you can see why the fights just take so long.

Ok, time to talk about the other job that particularly stood out to me, the Starseer. It’s a healing support job mostly focused around manipulating the party’s BP. Or at least the good skills it has are focused around BP. The divine skill is a wide untyped elemental attack dealing damage based around the whole team’s BP stock, and one of its utility skills also increases damage when the user uses BP, which you have to for divine skills. Another skill it has increases the BP gain of an ally to two per turn, rather than one. Unfortunately we’re already starting to get into the ok skill territory, as due to the way BP is gained, it is only useful for about half of the duration. After a character uses BP, they don’t gain any for the next turn, and since the max is 5 BP, there can only ever be two turns in a row where you benefit from this, and depending on support skills, the maximum benefit a character can get from this ability is an additional 4 – 6 BP. Now there is a Merchant skill that can give another character 4 BP instantly for the exact same cost. The rest of the skills range from decent but situational to worse versions of other job skills, and remember, Starseer is a secret job, meaning you don’t start with access to it, all the abilities are relatively expensive, and you have to fight a boss to unlock it. Continuing to a decent but situational skill is one that can target either enemies or allies, and prevents all stat buffs from being able to be applied to an enemy or prevents all stat debuffs from being able to be applied to an ally. If you know the enemy is a type to be able to apply either, this can be helpful if you can time it properly. The other skills of the job are mostly more expensive and / or worse versions of skills that other jobs have. From dealing multiple types of damage (worse than just 1 in 95% of cases) to healing over time (enemy’s damage considerably outpaces the healing it provides) to a counter that doesn’t prevent the damage like its counterpart, pretty much every active skill they have is disappointing.

I ran out of steam on that last paragraph, and stopped writing this for about 3 months, so I’ll just get one last point in. There are actually a lot of mechanics in the game that are kind of complicated, but since this game is about oversimplification, much of the most important nuance that the game actually has is hidden from the player. There are a ton of little bits of information that would make decision making in the game so much easier, but because the game refuses to display them, there’s a lot of guesswork. In some cases, this hidden information is obfuscating mechanics that subvert player expectations, so what they thought was an easy decision should actually be harder. The following is a non-comprehensive list of some of the worst offenders of hiding information in my opinion. The stat nuts, which raise character stats permanently, give different amounts of their stat depending on which character eats it. Moves that hit a random amount of times ignore all bonuses and penalties to accuracy and evasion. Items that reduce damage or recover HP/SP don’t say by how much, or whether it is percentage or a flat number. Healing skills scale with the caster’s elemental defense. What makes these and similar mechanics the most annoying is that there are some skills that do list exact numbers or percentages for their effects, so it is inconsistent too.

I will end this now and hopefully I covered everything I meant to. A lot of this was thought up while mowing the lawn or laying in bed trying to get to sleep so if something was lost in the recesses of my mind that’s unfortunate. I hope whoever made it all the way down here enjoyed reading, or at least thought it was interesting, and feel free to reach out to me if you’d like to hear more.

[faierius]

In His Shoes (12. The More You Know)

Chapter One (Can’t We All Just Get Along?)

Chapter Two (Out Of Body Experience)

Chapter Three (We Don’t Talk About That)

Chapter Four (My Body Won’t Change My Heart)

Chapter Five (Myth and Mystery)

Chapter Six (Baby Steps)

Chapter Seven (Sleep on it)

Chapter Eight (Seeds)

Chapter Nine (All About Perspective)

Chapter Ten (Sweet Dreams are Made of These)

Chapter Eleven (This is Not Our Name)

               Achoo!

               “Was that the ninth or tenth?” Gladio chuckled, glancing up from his book.

               “I lost track,” Noctis grumbled.

               “I believe that was the tenth,” Ignis commented, peeking up at the others.

               “Can’t help it!” Prompto whined with a nasally voice. “Gladio’s allergies are outta control.” He sneezed again.

               “These books are pretty dusty. At least I don’t have to deal with it for a change.” Turning the page, a small cloud of dust puffed off the book.

               “C’mon, I’m sufferin’ over here!” A chain of sneezes brought the total to fifteen. “My eyes itch, my nose itches, and I feel like I’ve got a head cold.”

               “Any excuse to get out of reading,” Noctis sighed, shaking his head as he turned his page.

               Prompto pouted, his face twisting up comically as the itch of an impending sneeze filled his sinuses. “Yeah, because I’m totally gonna learn anything in,” –Prompto peeked at the cover of his book— “Marine Biology of Eos, 726 Edition.”

               Noctis stopped reading and raised his eyebrows at Prompto. “Why did you even take that one?”

               “There’s like, twenty books in that box. I grabbed one at random,” Prompto replied with a shrug.

               “Maybe pick one with a relevant title this time,” Gladio advised, reaching across the coffee table and plucking the book from Prompto’s hands.

               “So I can sneeze all over it?” Prompto asked, rubbing his nose. Sighing, he leaned back in his seat and sneezed yet again. “What’re you guys reading?”

               Tossing the biology book aside, Gladio turned his own over to read the spine. “Duscae’s One Hundred Most Influential Individuals. Published in 719.”

               “Myths and Monsters; An Unofficial Bestiary,” Noctis replied.

               “Fabulae et Vita: Viribus Gelida.”

               “That sounds important,” Noctis commented, raising his eyes from his volume.

               Prompto leaned over to peek at Ignis’ book. “Can you read it? Is it in Lucian?”

               “Yes, and yes. It appears to be—”

               “Huh,” Gladio interrupted, flipping his page. “Did you guys know a hundred years ago there was a man who lived out near Alstor who farmed— raised? —cactuar?”

               “That hardly seems to be a rewarding profession. Why?” Ignis humored Gladio, looking up from his book.

               The man scanned a few lines of text. “He used their needles to create poison antidotes.”

               Ignis raised his brows, impressed. “While that does sound like an intriguing read, it hardly pertains to our predicament.”

               “Well I’m not done reading, just thought it was an interesting face to mention.”

               “Oh, yeah, totally!” Prompto agreed. “Y’know, now that I think about it, have you ever seen a baby cactuar? Like, do they all come in one size?”

               Noctis smirked. “Getting a little off-track, Prom.”

               “One day I’m gonna find a baby cactuar and snap a picture of it!”

               “If anyone can do it, it’d be you, Prompto,” Gladio assured him with a nod.

               Prompto beamed at the approval.

               Shaking his head, Noctis’ smile slipped as he turned his attention back to Ignis. “What were you saying, Specs?”

               “This book seems to be a biography of sorts,” he replied.

               “Well, yeah. The title itself pretty much means life story. Who’s it about?” Noctis asked, pulling his feet up into the chair and crossing his legs.

               “Insomnian born twins Eyoralin Viribus and Timorea Gelida,” Ignis answered as his eyes continued to move across the lines of text.

               “Never heard of ‘em,” said Gladio.

               “If they were important enough to have a book written about their lives, you’d think at least one of us would know who they are. Any ideas, Iggy?”

               The man shook his head. “I can’t say I’m familiar with the names. Perhaps they earned their reputation outside the city.”

               “That makes sense,” Prompto agreed, nodding.

               “Prompto?”

               “Yeah, Ig?”

               “Describe the woman you saw in your dream for me, please.”

               “With or without the grody daemon ooze?”

               “Without, if you wouldn’t mind.”

               “Uh…She would have been drop-dead gorgeous when she was alive. Dark red hair, scary blue eyes. Or, eye. The other one was black, but I think that had to do with being a daemon. Old fashion armor…I was kinda too scared to absorb much else.”

               Gladio turned his book around, holding it in one hand. “This her?”

               Eyebrows raised, Prompto looked up at Gladio’s book. As soon as his eyes locked on the portrait, he felt an icy hand grip his heart. Unable to form words, Prompto nodded emphatically, sinking as far into his chair as he could.

               Setting his book on the coffee table, Noctis got up and circled around to Prompto’s chair. Perching on the arm of the chair, he slipped his hand across the man’s shoulders. “You okay?” he asked, voice low.

               Heart pounding hard in his chest, Prompto couldn’t even nod as he stared at the image of the woman. Wide eyes locked on the picture, the same fear and pain he experienced in his dream trickling through him. Everything around the picture faded out of focus and black ooze dribbled from her right eye. The image shifted as she turned to look directly at him. That same fury he saw before burned in her good eye.

               Prompto spat out a curse, shooting out of his chair and rubbing his hands over his face. “Guys, I can’t. She’s in my head and she’s—” Sighing out a heavy breath, Prompto disappeared into the bathroom.

               Noctis glanced at Ignis, eyes filled with concern.

               “Gladio, may I see that book, please?” Ignis held out his hand, lips pursed. “I believe with these two books, I have plenty of research to do. Perhaps you should take Prompto out, help him relax.”

               “I’ll stay here and help,” Gladio stated.

               “You sure you want to let us off the hook?” Noctis asked, clasping his hands between his knees as he met the man’s eyes.

               “There is no hook to be let off of,” Ignis replied. “We have two books and four sets of eyes. Prompto is clearly disturbed by what he saw, so I won’t force him to help. And you are a greater source of comfort to him than either of us. That eliminated two superfluous sets of eyes.”

               Noctis blinked. “Wow. Cold.”

               “Just take the kid out for a few hours. Stop arguing.” Gladio told him with a shake of his head.

               Crossing his arms, Noctis slowly rose to his feet and narrowed his eyes. He flicked a glance toward the bathroom door. “You trust us alone together?”

               “You and I both know how little any of us pay attention to that rule, so I will redact it. However, that being said, I trust you to understand appropriate boundaries. Remember, those are not your bodies to do with as you please.”

               Chest swelling with a deep breath, Noctis dipped his head. “Got it. You don’t have to worry about us doing anything like that.”

               “Good. Go enjoy yourselves, Highness. Gladio and I will do what we can here.” Ignis offered a half smile before turning his attention back to the books. Looking at the lines of text without actually seeing it, he listened to Noctis coax Prompto out of the bathroom, then leave the suite.

               “I get kicking Prompto off research duty, but why Noctis?” Gladio asked when the door closed behind the pair.

               Handing one book over to Gladio, Ignis met his gaze. “Between what happened this morning, and the way Prompto is behaving now, His Highness’ concentration is severely lacking. His attention is better suited to calming Prompto at the moment.”

               “What did happen this morning?”

               “Do you recall the events which led to my not speaking to you for two days?”

               Brow knit in a frown, Gladio thought for a moment. When he located the memory, his face lit up with a bright grin. “Oh, yeah! It was worth it. That was a good night.”

               “Noctis experienced those events through a dream.”

               Gladio’s jaw dropped.

               “He was rightly upset.”

               “W-w-what do you mean by experienced?” Gladio stuttered out, swallowing hard.

               Ignis’ cheeks flushed as he cleared his throat. “He’s in my body, Gladio.”

               “And he was with me in the dream. No wonder he wanted to avoid Prompto,” Gladio groaned. “We need to fix this now. I really don’t want to deal with something like that.”

               “Then I suggest you start reading.”

               Nose wrinkled up at the prospect of having a dirty dream in the role of Prompto, Gladio opened his book again. Turning the page away from the portrait of the woman, a new face greeted him. This was an official-looking image, like one used in records, or on ID badges.

               “Hey, Ig?”

               “Yes?”

               Gladio put the book on the coffee table and spun it toward Ignis. “Does he look familiar to you?”

               Ignis studied the image for a moment. “Yes, I do believe I’ve seen this man before. He was a member of the Crownsguard under King Mors, was he not?”

               “Yes! That’s where I saw him. Hall of Records,” Gladio answered with a nod. “My dad made me study up on notable members of the Guard. Mors favored him because he was some sort of magic prodigy.”

               Ignis quickly flipped through his book, finding a section pertaining to the skills of the man known as Timorea Gelida. “How unusual,” he muttered, scanning the page.

               “What?”

               “As we all know, only members of the royal family and those blessed by the family can use the power of the elements. Timorea, with no connection to the throne, was able to use magic from a young age.”

               “You can use magic, too,” Gladio pointed out.

               “I believe my skills come from my close connection to Noctis and His Majesty. It is also theorized I may be very distantly related to the Lucis Caelum line,” Ignis replied.

               “Maybe it’s the same for Timorea?”

               “I suppose it’s possible. There had to be many branch families over the years. Either way, the fact that he can use magic isn’t the unusual part. He can only use one of the elements. Apparently, he was very strongly tied to ice elemancy.”

               “That’s…weird.”

               Ignis nodded. “I cannot say I’ve ever heard of such a case. Even members of the Glaive, who tend to favor certain elements, still have the ability to use others.”

               Gladio scoffed. “Did he make some deal with the Glacian?” he joked.

               “At this point, I won’t rule anything out.”

[starryelem]

Do we give characters trauma because we have trauma?

Or do we have trauma because we give characters trauma?

[starryelem]

I love how I open my notes app, holding back tears, wanting to write a fan fic but knowing I don’t have the guts to post it and I have 5% left on my phone with no working charger and out of no where I see that the last opened note was the poem I wrote to my brother, asking him for tiramisu.