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Dandelion News - September 8-14
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1. Pair of rare Amur tiger cubs debuting at Minnesota Zoo are raising hopes for the endangered species
“[The Minnesota Zoo’s] Amur tigers have produced 57 cubs, [… 21 of which] have gone on to produce litters of their own, amounting to another 86 cubs. […] “They’re showing a lot of resiliency, which is something that we work hard for in human care. We want these animals to have a lot of confidence and be able to adapt to new environments just as they’re doing today.””
2. Powered by renewable energy, microbes turn CO₂ into protein and vitamins
“The team designed a two-stage bioreactor system that produces yeast rich in protein and vitamin B9. [… The protein] levels in their yeast exceed those of beef, pork, fish, and lentils. […] Running on clean energy and CO2, the system reduces carbon emissions in food production. It uncouples land use from farming, freeing up space for conservation[… and] will help farmers concentrate on producing vegetables and crops sustainably.”
3. JCPenney Launches Apparel Collection Aimed At Wheelchair Users
“A major department store is rolling out a new line of clothing specifically tailored to meet the needs of women who use wheelchairs featuring options for both everyday wear and special occasions. [… The clothing have] modifications like zippers located for easy access, pocket positioning and extended back rises optimized for the seated position and shorter sleeves to limit interference with wheels.”
4. Snails bred in Edinburgh Zoo sent to re-populate species in French Polynesia
“Thousands of rare partula snails bred at Edinburgh Zoo are to be released in French Polynesia to restore the wild population of the species.The last surviving few of the species were rescued in the early 1990s[….] 15 species and sub-species [are being bred in zoos for repopulation], the majority of which are classed as extinct in the wild.”
5. [NH Joins 19 Other States] to Provide Essential Behavioral Health Services Through Mobile Crisis Intervention Teams
“[CMS] approved New Hampshire’s Medicaid State Plan Amendment for community-based mobile crisis intervention teams to provide services for people experiencing a mental health or substance use disorder crisis. […] The multidisciplinary team provides screening and assessment; stabilization and de-escalation; and coordination with and referrals to health, social, and other services, as needed.”
6. Recovery plan for Missouri population of eastern hellbender
“It is expected that recovery efforts for the Missouri DPS of the eastern hellbender will reduce sedimentation and improve water quality in the aforementioned watersheds, which will also improve drinking water, as well as benefit multiple federally listed mussels, sport fish and other aquatic species.”
7. How $7.3B will help rural co-ops build clean power—and close coal plants
“[The funds are] serving about 5 million households across 23 states [… to] build wind and solar power, which is now cheaper than coal-fired power across most of the country. […] Some of it will be used to pay down the cost of closing coal plants[….] federal funding could help co-ops secure enough wind, solar, and battery resources to retire their entire coal capacity by 2032, cutting carbon emissions by 80 to 90 percent and reducing wholesale electricity costs by 10 to 20 percent[….]”
8. Native-led suicide prevention program focuses on building community strengths
“[Indigenous researchers have] designed programs that aim to build up a community’s endemic strengths, rather than solely treating the risks facing individuals within that community. By providing support and resources that enable access to Alaska Native cultural activities, they hope to strengthen social bonds that build resilience. […] “In a Yup’ik worldview, suicide is not a mental health disorder, and it’s not an individual affliction, it’s a disruption of the collective.””
9. Another rare Javan rhino calf spotted at Indonesia park
“A new Javan rhino calf has been spotted in an Indonesian national park, the facility's head said Friday, further boosting hopes for one of the world's most endangered mammals after two other […] calves were spotted earlier this year at the park, which is the only habitat left for the critically endangered animal.”
10. Transparent solar cells can directly supply energy from glass surfaces
“[Researchers have] unveiled a method of supplying energy directly from glass of buildings, cars, and mobile devices through transparent solar cells. […] It has also succeeded in charging a smartphone using natural sunlight. It also proved the possibility that a screen of a small mobile device can be used as an energy source.”
September 1-7 news here | (all credit for images and written material can be found at the source linked; I don’t claim credit for anything but curating.)
#hopepunk#good news#nature#tiger#endangered species#sustainability#animals#nutrition#jc penney#wheelchair user#adaptive clothing#fashion#snail#edinburgh#scotland#french polynesia#mental health#new hampshire news#missouri#hellbenders#salamander#wind energy#solar power#clean energy#native#community#rhino#technology#baby animals#solar panels
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And they were roommates
(Captain John price x F!reader)
Summary: the captain wants somewhere more homely to settle down and when an offer like yours comes alight on Zillow he must take up on it.
Warnings: separation, flirtatious commentary, mentions of sex (lmk if anymore
part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5 - part 6- part 7 - part 8 - Part 9 - part 10 - part 11 - part 12 - part 13
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“There’s our love stricken captain.” Gaz says as John finally appears through the heavy compound doors. As they all look at him it's very noticeable he’s in love, their captain looks well, the boys all assumed the bags under his eyes were permanent but looking at him they seem to be fully gone and all his features look brighter.
“Come on let's debrief.” is all he says while walking to his office, the three men immediately rise from where they were sitting and follow behind him.
“Pants looking extra snug captain.” soap mutters.
“Yeah it's called happiness son, ever heard of it?” John swifty jabs back, swinging the empty room door open.
“No, unfortunately I have not.”
“And stop looking at my ass.” John says while sliding manilla folders across the table as their hands each reach for one.
“Yeah Johnny, stop looking at the captain's ass.” gaz adds.
“I wasn't!” soap says flipping the folder open harshly.
“Back to business.” John says as he begins speaking through their plan of attack.
—------
“How’d the missus take it?” john likes the term simon uses to refer to you, gives him hope that one day you will be his Mrs.
“Good, at least that's what she made it seem like.” Simon reads right through the soft frown that covers his captain's face, it wasn’t easy for him.
“Did she cry?” Simon says as the both come to a halt scanning their access cards to the armory.
“A little, felt like a fucking bullet to the chest.”
“At least you know she actually likes you.” Simon was never good at comforting people but that outright made his captain laugh.
“Yeah at least, not like sharing moments of intimacy in our own world and exchanging words of endearment was enough.” John's smile creases at the side of his eyes as he lightly shoves Simon's shoulder.
—------------
Back at home you slept until late in the evening only waking up from your buzzing phone vibrating under your pillow. Not checking who it is because quite frankly you don't care, you press the phone to your ear with a sigh.
“Hello.”
“Doll?” you sit up looking at the name on your phone it’s an unidentified number then you realize immediately pressing it back to your ear.
“John!”
“Yeah, everything alright?” he worriedly replies.
“Yes I was just sleeping.” you say softly smiling tears already filling your eyes.
“Alone I hope.”
“Want a picture?” you say seductively.
“On this government issued phone? Absolutely.” He cracks a smile at the sound of your laugh, his task force stares at him like he’s a zoo animal, inspecting closely, especially the soldiers who don’t know him as anything apart from brutal.
“I'm actually calling to let you know I'll be on a helicopter for the next couple of hours and don’t know when I'll be able to contact you again.” he says, turning around to view the sunset, the same one he knows cascades your guys’ room in a beautiful shade of orange.
“Okay, stay safe, call me when you can, and I love you a lot and I don't even know what to say.” your charm travels through the phone like electricity and he just wants to kiss your face.
“I love you, keep safe till then. I left my card on top of the kitchen table for anything and everything. Please use it.” you sigh and he can practically see you shaking your head. He couldn’t promise his safety when he basically sold it once he began this occupation.
“John you slick man, you don't have to do things like that.” you say as the helicopter rotors start spinning.
“Yeah but I do, gotta go doll talk soon.”
“Bye hon.” With that he hears the click, biting the inside of his cheek as anxiety creeps its way up his neck, he’ll be far from you further than ever and can only pray for your safety instead of ensuring it and it makes him sick.
—-----------------
You moped, and good god was it humiliating, you'd been a single independent lady for years before meeting john but now it was like being put into an isolated home after living in new york city. There was nothing to do, you cleaned, cooked, painted but nothing was curing the pure ache of boredom and yearning.
The morning after his departure was single handedly the hardest, the weight of his body creased beside you, keeping you warm even in little clothes, his breathing that'd softly blow atop your head had not been there.
Still no call you disappointedly noticed when you hurriedly checked your phone when it had started buzzing, just a spam call you sigh rolling out of bed and heading to the bathroom.
“I should call my sister.” you say to yourself in the mirror with a small nod. Happily walking back to bed you dial the phone.
“Hey stranger, been a while.” she says with subtle amusement.
“It's been like four days?” you smile.
“That's a lifetime ago.”
“Want to come over, stay for a bit?” you ask for the first time in a long time.
“I don't kn-”
“Please.”
“Yeah, I'll try to catch the next train. Let me pack some clothes and I'll call you back.” when she hangs up you sigh in relief, nothing in this world could cure loneliness like spending time with her.
—------------
“So you’re trying to tell me YOU HAVEN'T HAD SEX!” soap exclaims.
“I didn’t say that I said I'm not disclosing my personal intimate life with you.” John says while huffing on a cigar tired of being in this goddamn helicopter with a four year old.
“Same thing.”
“Johnny shut up good grief.” Gaz says, rubbing his forehead in defeat when Johnny starts up again.
“You guys are so boring, how much time do we have left anyways.” he sighs out dramatically.
“An hour.” Simon replies.
“Oh so he speaks.” Johnny happily says looking at Simon with wide eyes waiting for a response. Pindrop silence overtakes the cabin.
“Or maybe he doesn’t.”
—-----------------------
thank you for the love and support <3
@beebeechaos @ttsbaby01 @arminarlertssword @quakeroaksguy @rafaelacallinybbay @bumblebeesfromvenus @glitterypirateduck @midnights-song @lovelythingsinternal @fruitymoonbeams-blog @kkaaaagt @kit-williams @enfppuff @kythefangirl25 @eviltheleon @here4thespice @dclore22 @raethethey @waves-against-a-cliff @novausstuff @darling006 @vampirekilmerfic @Dreams-of-qian-qian @spngingerbread21 @thepumpkinqueen93 @copiasratscheese @youdontknowe @spyderdoll @angels-gonna-play @viisgrave @lieutenantlashfaz @sunndust @beckythecatqueen-blog @aoioozora @o-birdseed-o @mothmothmothmothmothmoth @ihateuguys @oversensitivitea @spicyspicyliving @maladptivedaydreaming
#angst#captain price x female reader#john price#captain john price#john price x reader#task force 141#barry sloane#john soap mactavish#simon ghost riley#kyle gaz garrick
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kids are about 8/9 here. idk what this is. happy 10 days to Halloween?
cw: violence, blood, gore (not the turtles'), cussing
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Later, Donnie would say going to the surface was Leo's idea, but really, it had been an unspoken joint decision. He wanted to search the trash in the alley for building materials, Leo was just annoyed at being treated like a baby. Sure, it made sense why Mikey wasn't allowed to go to the surface without Raph, but why were the two of them subject to the same rules? They were a whole year older!
So when Papa fell asleep in his chair, and with Raph chasing an uncooperative Mikey around, begging him to take a bath, Leo looked at Donnie, then at the exit to the tunnels, and Donnie followed him right out.
At first it was exhilarating. He and Leo had been to the surface several times now, but it was always with Raph or Splinter, and that meant it came with rules. Don't touch that. Stay where I can see you. Don't run off. There's too many humans that way. No you can't take that back to the lair, it's dangerous. On and on and on. But this time they were alone, and Donnie wasn't going to stop Leo from climbing the fire escape and petting the cats sitting on windowsills as long as Leo wouldn't tell him to put the old, broken electronics and jagged pieces of metal he found back in the dumpster.
And Leo didn't say a thing about it, other than to call him a nerd. Of course.
It was a cool night, but not so cold that it made Donnie shiver. It had rained recently, so everything was damp and there was a fog that held in the air. The only noise besides what the two of them made came from an old pair of vending machines right by the entrance to the street, buzzing and humming with electricity. Leo had already asked Donnie if he could "hack it" to get them some drinks and snacks, and Donnie had shooed him off so he could get back to his scavenging. But he was seriously considering giving it a try once his work was done.
Leo dropped off the fire escape and wandered closer to the street. It was deep into the night, but when Donnie looked he could still see Leo in the glow from the vending machine, so he didn't worry too much. He'd just found a perfectly good toaster that someone threw out, and he absolutely planned to take it back with him.
He'd just ducked down to tug at a box sticking out of the mound of trash, when he heard a voice echo off the bricks of the buildings.
"Yooo, dude. Did you see that!?"
"Shhh, shhh, hold on," said another voice, followed by some quick footsteps.
And then Leo yelped.
Donnie's heart was pounding against his plastron as he slowly and carefully peeked above the rim of the dumpster. Two big humans stood in the light of the vending machine; one of them had Leo, holding him by the lip of his shell where it opened for his head.
"The hell is this?"
"Looks like some kind of fucked up turtle."
"I knew the Hudson was radioactive, man."
Leo squirmed in their grasp, but they were way bigger and stronger, and they kept him from escaping. He didn't have his weapons, because Dad only let them have them when they were training ("You'll poke your eye out," he'd said). Fat lot of good that did them now.
"What do you think we could sell it for?" asked one of the humans.
"Who would even want it?"
"Dude, someone's gotta. A zoo or something!"
"Damn, you're right. It's worth a try, right?"
Donnie's blood ran cold. They were going to take Leo away. They were going to take his brother away, and he'd never see him again, never get to talk to him or play with him again, and Donnie
couldn't
let
that
happen.
Before he himself even knew what he was planning, he'd jumped out of the dumpster and shot straight toward the humans. They'd only just noticed him when he launched himself at the one holding Leo and bit, directly into the hairy, exposed flesh.
An agonized scream filled the alley.
The leg Donnie was biting began to shake and kick, frantically trying to dislodge him, but Donnie only bit down tighter, sinking all his teeth into the man, his jaws locking and refusing to let go. There was a thud as something hit the concrete beside him; the man was still screaming.
"GET HIM OFF ME! GET HIM OFF GET HIM OFF- OH SHIT-"
Human hands grabbed at Donnie and yanked, but he didn't let go. A disgusting, metallic taste filled his mouth, and something chewy and unpleasant was coming loose between his teeth.
The men were both yelling now, kicking, hitting, but Donnie didn't let go, he wouldn't, he couldn't-
Until he felt a hand wrap around his. Small, three-fingered, and as familiar as his own.
Donnie yanked back. The chewy thing between his teeth came with him. The man was still shrieking in pain, blood pouring down his leg and staining his socks and sneakers, snot and spittle hanging from his face.
"WHAT THE FUCK!" yelled the man.
Donnie and Leo scrambled backwards, hands locked tight together.
"Dude, we gotta get you to a hospital," said the uninjured man, grabbing the other human's arm and tugging. For a moment, the injured man fought back, waving his fists at Donnie and Leo.
"I'M GONNA KILL THAT THING!" the man screamed. A light came on in a window above.
"Come on, man, it probably has rabies," said the other human, still tugging. "Let's get out of here. Call animal control."
For a second, Donnie thought he would keep coming, even with a limp, but eventually he relented, and went with his companion. They could still here the man yelling as they disappeared from sight.
Donnie and Leo watched, still and silent in the shadows beyond the vending machines, for a very long moment. The only sounds in the alley were the electric hum of the vending machines, but it was louder now, somehow, louder and more annoying and pressing in on Donnie from all sides.
He suddenly became very aware of a sticky substance on his hands and arms and shoulders and face. The unpleasant taste was still in his mouth, as was the squishy thing, and it filled him with revulsion. He spat it out on the ground, and saw skin and hair and red stuff and-
He wanted to gag, but he couldn't. He could feel his muscles shutting down, the way they did sometimes. He hated this feeling, but he knew from experience he couldn't stop it. It was out of his control now.
The whine started at the back of his throat and built in intensity until it drowned out the sounds of the vending machines. His hands moved to clutch his head against his will, and he sank to the ground, curling up over his knees and pressing himself against them in a desperate bid to get it all to stop.
"Shoot, Dee," he heard Leo say, and then he moved away. Donnie couldn't open his eyes to see where he went, but a moment later he heard the sound of glass breaking.
A few seconds later, he heard a soft fizz, and then something cool was being pressed against his arm.
Slowly, he squinted his eyes open. He could barely stand it, but he had to do it, to see Leo in crouching in front of him, holding out a bottle of cola and signing at him to drink.
Clumsily, he took it. The mix of cola and the metallic taste in his mouth almost made him gag again, and he spat that out, too. Somehow, it helped. He repeated this action several more times, until the bottle was almost empty and his mouth was free of that terrible taste.
Then, slowly, a little at a time, he drank the rest.
The world backed down to a manageable level. Leo was still in front of him, looking worried. His eyes and face were wet, and Donnie didn't think it was from the mist.
Still, he met Donnie's eyes with a wobbly smile and asked, "Ready to go down?"
Hesitantly, Donnie stood up. When he didn't fall over, he nodded. Leo nodded back, then went to the manhole cover and opened it up.
Donnie didn't go back for the toaster. He didn't even remember it, really.
Leo gestured for Donnie to go down the ladder first, then covered over the hole behind them. They made their way to the bottom more slowly than they ever did with Raph, neither of them feeling up to any tricks tonight.
They walked back towards the lair in silent for a few minutes, while Donnie got his voice back. Leo waited for him to talk first, and Donnie appreciated that.
"...Where'd you get the soda?" he asked, when he could.
"Broke the glass on the vending machine with a rock," Leo explained. He gave Donnie a playful grin. "It's faster than hacking."
Donnie rolled his eyes at that. He could have done it if he'd had time!
They walked a bit further. Donnie was still covered in the sticky, gross substance, but when Leo reached for his hand again, Donnie took it.
"Thanks," said Leo, quieter now.
"I didn't want them to take you away," said Donnie honestly.
Leo's hand squeezed his. "I didn't want to go away," he said, his voice sounding strained.
Donnie stopped, and so did Leo. They turned to look at each other, as best as they could in the dark sewer tunnels.
Then Donnie launched himself at Leo, wrapping him in the tightest hug he could, and Leo hugged him back, burying his face in the soft place against Donnie's neck and shell. Donnie could feel something wet land on him, but he didn't mind because it wasn't sticky like the other stuff.
He just held Leo tight, and Leo held back, for a long while.
(They were still like that when Splinter and Raph found them. The blood freaked them out, and learning it wasn't Donnie's hadn't reassured them.
They were grounded for three weeks, but they still got to be together and read comics, so really, it wasn't too bad.)
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The Best News of Last Week - May 15, 2023
🧲 - Magnetic Marvels: Researchers Flip the Switch on Depression
1. New Zealand Government announces prescriptions charges will be free.
The $5 prescription fee at pharmacies will be scrapped in July. This is set to save about 3 million people a year money, and in particular 770,000 people aged over 65. It will make most prescriptions in New Zealand free.
Free access to medicines is also hoped to ease pressure on the over-burdened health system by helping people get medicines sooner.
2. Platypuses return to Sydney's Royal National Park after disappearing for decades
Platypuses have been relocated to the Royal National Park in Sydney, after they disappeared from the park's waterways about 50 years ago. A joint project by the University of New South Wales, NSW National Parks and Wildlife Service and the World Wildlife Fund has reintroduced five females to the Hacking River, with a group of males to follow next week.
3. 74-year-old musician Otis Taylor gets Denver high school diploma decades after being expelled for hair
A musician who was expelled from a Denver high school over 50 years ago received his diploma. Otis Taylor was kicked out of Manual High School in 1966 because of his hair. This was decades before laws ending racial hair discrimination. Denver Public Schools wanted to right a wrong.
4. Researchers treat depression by reversing brain signals traveling the wrong way (with magnets)
A new study led by Stanford Medicine researchers is the first to reveal how magnetic stimulation treats severe depression: by correcting the abnormal flow of brain signals. Powerful magnetic pulses applied to the scalp to stimulate the brain can bring fast relief to many severely depressed patients for whom standard treatments have failed.
The FDA-cleared treatment, known as Stanford neuromodulation therapy, incorporates advanced imaging technologies to guide stimulation with high-dose patterns of magnetic pulses that can modify brain activity related to major depression. Compared with traditional TMS, which requires daily sessions over several weeks or months, SNT works on an accelerated timeline of 10 sessions each day for just five days.
5. Electricity generation through solar, wind and water exceeded total demand in mainland Spain on Tuesday, a pattern that will be repeated more and more in the future
The Spanish power grid on Tuesday tasted an appetizer of the renewable energy banquet that is expected to flourish in the coming years. For nine hours, between 10 a.m. and 7 p.m., the generation of green electricity was more than enough to cover 100% of Spanish peninsular demand, a milestone that had already been reached on previous occasions, but not for such a prolonged period.
6. RI Senate passes bill making lunch free at all public schools
Free lunch for all public school students in Rhode Island is one step closer to becoming a reality.
Tuesday night the Rhode Island Senate overwhelmingly passed a bill by a vote of 31-4 that would do just that. If the companion bill in the House were to pass, that takes effect July 1. The bill would make breakfast and lunch free for all public school students in the state, regardless of their household income.
7. Critically endangered red wolf pups born at North Carolina Zoo
The North Carolina Zoo in Asheboro celebrated the arrival of “not one but TWO litters” of the world’s most endangered wolf – the red wolf – in late April and early May.
A total of nine pups were born – three to parents Marsh and Roan, and six to Denali and May – the zoo announced on May 9.
----
That's it for this week :)
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EVERY YOU EVERY ME #10
COLLABORATED WITH @THIRSTWORLDPROBLEMSS
Pairing: Miguel O'Hara x female reader
Summary: Miguel tries to rob a superhero and you try to stop him.
Word count: 5,750
Series Masterlist | Spiderverse Masterlist | Astroboot’s Masterlist | thirstworldproblemss’ Masterlist
[Previous] [Next]
It’s another mundane morning in your office. You’re hiding away in your cubicle with your breakfast croissant and coffee, scrolling the news on your phone.
Ever since the cosmic murder attempts have started, reading news hasn't been the same for you. It’s no longer a case of innocently keeping up to date with current events. Because now you can’t read the sensationalist headlines without a small pang of guilt that you may have been the unwilling root cause for so many of them.
‘Apocalyptic blizzard in August.’
‘Stampede escape from Brooklyn zoo.’
‘Freak electric storm causes wide city blackout’.
It’s all just too macabre for you this early, it’s not even 10am. Your eyes flicker down, only skimming to make sure that there has been no casualties involved with each incident before scrolling away again. Then you opt for the technology section instead. Hoping it is a little bit less catastrophic and kinder on your nerves.
‘Tony Stark’s Arc Reactor Returns Home to Stark Tower.’
Your fingers pause at the headline. Stark always makes for a good read and good gossip, you think to yourself as you take another sip from your morning coffee and start to read:
‘Tony Stark, the notorious billionaire philanthropist and avid Star Wars memorabilia collector, has announced his decision to move his iconic arc reactor back to his home in New York City. The self-sustaining fusion power source kept Stark alive during the infamous hostage incident where he was captured and detained in Afghanistan by the Ten Rings terrorist organization’.
‘Self-sustaining fusion power source…’ you repeat the phrase in your head, parsing over the words. Why does that sound so familiar to you?
You read it again, and this time instead of your own voice, the memory of Miguel’s sleep husked voice fills your ears:
“Your world is not technically advanced enough for me to build an upgraded self-sustaining fusion power source that would be needed.”
Adrenaline buzzes bright in your brain, and you stand up from your desk so fast you nearly knock over your chair.
Finally! It’s the Eureka moment you have been waiting for all this time.
You peer over the cubicle wall, scanning the room for Miguel. It doesn’t take you long at all to spot him; his oversized frame is hard to miss. Besides, even if you couldn’t see him, you’d be able to sense the anger vibrating off of him a mile away.
In the corner at the far end of the open-plan office, Miguel is abusing the poor printer again. He’s cramming a fistful of papers into the feeding slot like it’s a duck he’s trying to force feed to make foie gras, and judging from the vein straining on his forehead, the man is about two seconds from lifting the 50 pound machine and launching it out through one of the building’s windows.
You shake your head at the scene. You don't understand how someone so smart, so intelligent, so apt with technology—he built an A.I. so advanced it would make the most high tech of Stark Industry's prototypes look like a kindergartener's chicken scrawl—can be so inept when it comes to dealing with a basic printer.
“Miguel,” you whisper loudly, and despite the fact that he’s on the other side of a bustling office, he immediately turns to look at you.
You beckon him over, practically bouncing with excitement as you wait for him to cross the room, and as soon as he’s within reach, you stand on the tip of your toes and cup a hand around his ear so you can covertly whisper the news of your discovery.
“Stark has an arc reactor.”
You’re beaming with pride that you’ve found a solution to your dilemma, and look up at Miguel expectantly for him to celebrate with you and maybe even praise you.
Instead, he looks down at you without reaction. “What’s Stark?”
"Wait, are you serious?"
You almost think he’s doing one of his sarcastic comedic bits with you, but the angle of his right eyebrow, raised in cluelessness tells you otherwise.
"How do you know so much about Dr. Strange, but not know who Tony Stark is? He’s like the main Avenger."
Miguel merely shrugs at you. "Avengers aren't really a thing where I'm from."
You shove your phone into his hand and watch as his eyes flicker over the screen, reading through the article in a matter of a few seconds. When he’s done, he places the phone back on your desk, then grabs your left hand, leaning down as he lifts it up towards him. For a second you think he’s about to kiss your hand.
"Lyla," Miguel announces, and the watch buzzes warmly against your wrist as Lyla's hologram reforms in the small space above.
"Give me the layout of the Stark Tower, identify vulnerabilities in the security system and outline the most optimal entrance points for a break-in."
Did he just say break-in?
"Wait, wait,” you interrupt quickly, trying to defuse the situation, before he gets too far ahead of himself. “Miguel, we are NOT breaking into the Stark Tower."
"How else would we do it?"
“We could just talk to him. Lyla can hack into his schedule and book us a meeting with him, right?”
“And then what?”
“We’d ask him to help us?” you suggest, not understanding why he skipped straight over the most obvious answer and went right to breaking and entering. Though from the way Miguel is staring at you in blank confusion you may as well have spontaneously grown horns on your head.
“...Nicely,” you add, in case that wasn’t already clear.
“Because that would require us to talk to him. He would just say no, Cielito. I’d prefer to break in. Cleaner that way. More efficient. Easier.”
You can’t believe this man just admitted to being so socially awkward he thinks committing a felony is easier than having to hold a conversation with a stranger.
"Asking is pointless. No scientist is just going to hand over something like an arc reactor to a couple of strangers because they asked nicely. Besides, even if we arrange a meeting with him by hacking into his calendar, he’ll know something is up the moment he sees us. You’ll just wind up getting thrown out by security.”
Ok maybe he has a point there.
"What if we tricked him? Made him think we have something he wants?”
"Like what?"
"Stark collects rare Star Wars collectibles. We can lie and say we're collectors with a rare piece to sell like the Kenner Star Wars Boba Fett prototype?"
His right brow raises at a skeptical angle and he’s staring at you like you’re speaking a foreign language.
"Cielo, that's insane."
You bristle at that.
"How is your idea any better?" you demand.
"A break-in wouldn't require much effort or rely on the goodwill or stupidity of someone else. It’s much easier–"
“You’re talking about breaking into the personal home of an Avenger!” you interrupt because you’re not listening to any more of his madness, “He’s arguably the smartest member of a team made up of the mightiest heroes on Earth, and you want to try to steal from him, Miguel!? That is not easier!”
The office has gone alarmingly quiet around you. You look around to see that your heated discussion is gaining unwarranted attention from the rest of the office. All of a sudden, the endless click and clack of the keyboards stop.
You give your curious coworkers a strained smile, then lean up close to Miguel again, muttering under your breath. “We’ll discuss this when we get home.”
Miguel doesn’t say anything else, but you can feel his eyes pinned to your back as you walk to your chair and sit back down at your desk to finish your croissant in two mouthfuls, chugging down the remainder of your coffee.
An hour before noon, Miguel comes to your cubicle. He sets down a lunchbox and from the logo on the plastic grocery bag you can tell that it’s from your favorite Bodega round the corner.
“I have a quick errand to run for work at lunch. I’ll be back within the hour,” Miguel tells you, “Lyla will guard you, and if something happens she’ll alert me immediately. Don’t go anywhere.”
You look up from your screen to see him stand over your desk with that passive expression etched onto his stoic face, as if there is nothing out of the ordinary.
In the last month, Miguel hasn’t let you out of his sight for longer than a handful of minutes (primarily to get more snacks when they run out).
Miguel thinks he’s being so slick. It’s insulting to your intelligence that he thinks you don’t know what he is up to: he’s obviously going to spend his lunch hour trying to rob Tony Stark.
But that’s fine, you’re not going to openly question Miguel on his suspicious behavior. If he’s not here that means you are free to get up to whatever you want.
… Including approaching a certain multibillionaire that has the one item in his possession that could save both your life and the universe as you know it from collapsing.
It’s why you wave at him as he makes his way to the exit and pay close attention to him leaving through the front glass door and take the elevator down to the ground floor. Then for good measure you wait another five minutes to make sure that he will fully be out of hearing range with his super-senses before you raise your wrist to your face.
“Lyla,” you whisper.
“Hello, boss girl! Wasssuuuup,” she greets, elongating the word sassily for comedic effect, and you can’t help but smile.
Lyla, as entertaining as she is, is an enigma to you. You don’t understand how Miguel with his short patience-span and entirely lacking sense of humor would have programmed this A.I. to have this kind of personality. Not to mention a deep archive of a millenial’s pop-culture media reference from this dimension.
“What can I do you for?” Lyla asks, shooting you gun-fingers with a cheeky flare.
You part your mouth, but hesitate to make the request.
This is illegal isn’t it? Hacking into someone’s calendar to arrange a meeting with them under false pretenses. God, what if you get taken away in handcuffs within the first 30 seconds of entering the building, featured on Deuxmoi as a crazy stalker fan.
So far the only “illegal” thing you’ve used Lyla for is to generate Netflix passwords and hack into HBO Max to watch Succession. This is a significant next level step.
Maybe you should run downstairs and catch Miguel before he leaves the building? You could plead your case again. Try to reason with him that breaking and entering isn’t the way to go about it and the two of you should approach Tony Stark by having a mature and adult conversation.
Yeah. Right. You snort even as you think it. Miguel is never going to be persuaded on this point and you are quickly running out of time. There’s only one thing to do:
“Lyla, can you please arrange a lunchtime meeting for me with Tony Stark today.”
The lobby of Stark Tower is much like any other commercial buildings you’d find in the Financial District. Heck, it's not that much different from the one you navigate every morning at the Chrysler building. If anything, the only surprise is how ordinary the Stark Tower is.
When you enter the main lobby, you have to sign in with a stern but clearly bored security guard, then use the guest security pass you’re given in order to access the elevators.
Once you reach the 90th floor, there is a distinct lack of staff up there. Only a single, sweet-looking old man, with a well trimmed mustache above his upper lip. He's swathed in a soft-knitted cardigan and wearing gigantic vintage-styled sunglasses indoors that make him appear bug-eyed as he peers up at you and walks with you to another set of elevators using a retinal scan for security and sends you on your way.
The door closes around you in the metal box, with a swift jump to the 91st floor.
When the door finally slides open it feels like you’ve entered another world. Minimalistic opulence is the keyword for it. There are windows along the entire space. A 360 view of the New York landscape and you almost feel like you are at an Aquarium with the amount of glass surrounding you. There’s pieces of half-built tech and prototypes everywhere. Imagine having so much money that you can allocate a whole floor of a manhattan skyscraper to essentially be your garage workshop.
“So you’re my 1pm that magically appeared today,” a happy-go-lucky voice sings out.
You jump in your skin, breaking your concentration from the view, as you turn around to see the infamous man of the hour standing behind you.
“Gotta say, when I was envisioning the sort of person who might be selling me a Kenner Star Boba Fett figure, I did not imagine a gorgeous knock-out,” he says, with an outstretched hand as he greets you.
Tony Stark is shorter in real life. Less formal than in the gettymarked photos you’ve seen of him at red carpet events and fancy galas, dressed up in the most tailored fit suits that money can possibly buy. He’s also a lot more charming than in photos. All big brown eyes, and pouty lips. He might be half the size of Miguel, but Tony Stark has more than enough charm and confidence to make up for it
“Let’s go somewhere we can talk.”
He is quick witted banter and dazzling diamond smiles as he shows you the residential suite of the Stark Tower. His hand rests on the side of your waist as he guides you through the long hall, making strong eye contact all the while down the hall. 91 floors up and you cannot hear a hint of the chaotic traffic noise downstairs, it’s oddly quiet save for the faint scratching noises you hear from the ceiling. (Guess even Stark towers cannot escape the city’s rodent issues).
“Anyone ever told you, your eyes really sparkle?” Stark says, as his hand slips from your shoulder to rest at the small of your back. “You’ve got this whole Disney princess thing going on. I dig it.”
Wait, is he flirting with you?
Tony Stark, Chief Executive Officer of Stark Industries. One of the top 20 richest men in America (according to Forbes). A man who can afford to buy the whole of planet Mars is flirting with you.
God, you are already seeing dollar signs. Lobster. Caviar. All the rare exotic and poisonous puffer fish sushi you've only dreamed of eating. You've always wanted to be a gold digger, you've just never been close enough to a gold mine.
Maybe this will be easier than you thought. If he likes you, maybe you can just flirt your way into getting the arc reactor. Ask him to lend it to you.
The two of you make your way past the glass doors and into another imposing large room, bare and minimalistic. Oddly, it feels dimly lit, given the size of the windows in the room.
It’s the size of the front lobby of your office building, and you realize halfway through that this room serves no other purpose except to store more of his junk. There are half built machines piled up in every corner. Boxes and boxes of tools haphazardly strewn across the room. It’s an outrageous waste of prime New York real estate that speaks to the man’s wealth.
In the middle of the room, there’s a silver medal that glows an eerie blue in the middle, encased in a display case. With the way it sparkles, you could almost mistake it for a precious aquamarine gemstone the size of your fist.
“Wow, is that the arc reactor?” you ask.
Stark doesn’t answer. Suddenly his chattiness is nowhere to be found, and as you turn to look at him you notice he’s not paying any attention to you. His eyes are fixed on the ceiling behind you.
You whip your head around and follow his gaze to see the familiar blue super-suit trailing behind you. The unmissable angry red spider embellished across his wide chest, as he hangs upside down like a cat burglar.
Has he been trailing behind you since you got here? Was that what the noises were?
Air whizzes through the space and the force of it reverberates across your cheek. A piece of red armor flies through the air and attaches itself to Stark’s arm.
You’ve seen enough highlight reels of Iron Man on the news channel to know what it means.
“Wait wait wait,” you shout out as you step in front of Stark in mid-transformation.
You fling your hands up high in a gesture of a white flag to de-escalate the situation. “This isn’t what it looks like!”
Stark’s eyebrow quirks up, tipping his head sardonically. "So your costumed sidekick hasn't been stalking us this entire time? Breaking and entering, not just into my tower–which is private property, by the way–but also bypassing security to access my private office? Yeah, I'm sure your intentions are entirely on the level."
Despite the sarcastic hostility in his tone Stark hasn’t summoned the rest of the armor. The rest of his iron suit is suspended in the air on standby two feet away. He’s only got the arm piece strapped to his arm as insurance and is clearly willing to give you at least a few seconds of a benefit of a doubt. Long enough to hopefully explain yourself and not start a Superhero brawl.
“He’s not dangerous,” you say, and the moment you say it, you want to kick yourself because of how suspicious that makes you sound.
You turn your head around to Miguel who’s done an aerial somersault with the grace of a ballerina despite his build and soundlessly landed back onto his feet on the ground.
“I can’t believe you went behind my back! We agreed to put a pin in this and wait to deal with Stark until we agreed on a plan. You said you weren’t going to break in!”
His masked eyes narrow into accusing slits, “Yeah? And what are you doing here then?”
“Stopping you before you do something stupid!” you hiss.
Before Miguel has a chance to retort, there is a loud clap from behind you that redirects both your attentions to Stark.
“Jarvis, how did our lovely Disney princess make it onto my calendar and how did Hulk Spiderman over here manage to slip past every layer of your security net?”
The voice of a posh British man sounds out across the room but there’s no person attached to it.
“I can find no record of these events in my logs. Performing internal diagnostics now, Sir.”
“Huh, interesting…” Tony hums to himself in consideration before he turns his attention back to you both.
“I have to say I'm quite impressed, but I’m hoping for an explanation. Is this a Bonny and Clyde situation? You two lovebirds here to rob me?”
“No!” you both shout in unison.
“Not lovebirds, got it.”
“That’s not–” Miguel starts, whipping down his head in your direction.
At the sight of your face, he seems too flustered to continue his train of thought and he quickly looks away from you. “None of your business,” he snaps at Stark.
You don’t know why, but that dismissive glance from him hurts. Like the very idea that you two would be in a romantic relationship is off-putting to him. It’s kind of insulting. You turn from him, trying to ignore the sharp stabbing ache somewhere in your chest that makes it hard to breathe.
From across, Stark observes the two of you, whatever he sees makes him tip his head in curiosity. The intense pinch between his brow relaxes and the subtle shift in his expression is like witnessing the moment a shark senses blood in the water, then he grins and turns his attention towards you.
Stark grins, turning his attention towards you. "So you're single then?"
You peer up at Miguel and hesitate because that’s a damned good question. You of this dimension is certainly single, but there’s another version of you (a dead one) that’s married to the man next to you.
But that’s not you.
You turn to Stark, "Yes," you answer.
Miguel whips his head to you, eyes wide. "No!" he bellows.
"The lady says she is, big blue."
"And I say she's not!" Miguel growls, the last word ends on such loud volume it could break the sound barrier.
Miguel isn’t the best at reading cues. You’ve known Tony Stark for all of five minutes, and even you can tell that the man enjoys riling up people, Miguel is feeding right into that.
Stark acts like Miguel is speaking at a decibel that he is unable to register. He saunters up to you, with the most carefree gait you’ve seen anyone carry around Miguel.
"So are you free tonight?" Stark asks.
You spot Miguel’s bristling expression and hesitate for a second time.
It’s mean, you shouldn’t rile Miguel up like this. His entire back is curved up like a hissing cat. The man looks like he’s about to blow a casket, acting like a jealous spouse. And somehow under Tony Stark’s attention you feel like you are the adulterous wife.
Except once again, you’re not. Because you are not Miguel’s wife.
… Why exactly are you pining after a man still grieving his dead ex-wife who happens to look like you?
You're currently homeless. Your take-home salary as an insurance adjuster can’t afford you a new apartment in New York, not with the rising inflation and the current state of this economy. This is your highway express ticket to the charmed life of being a billionaire ex-wife.
Bye bye to 9 to 5’s and having to manually enter data into thousands of excel sheets everyday. Jeff Bezos' former wife, Mackenzie Bezos was awarded 25% of their Amazon shares valued at over 38 billion dollars. Stark is twice as rich as that.
You slide closer to Stark. "Maybe? Where are you gonna take me? Somewhere fancy?"
"Yeah, no! Absolutely not!" Miguel interjects.
He steps forward to drag you behind him, until his mountainous body blocks you from the man.
“We need the arc reactor.” Miguel announces brusquely, with no fanfare and even less by way of explanation. “If you won’t give it to us, I’ll just have to take it.”
“What do you need it for?” Stark asks curiously.
“That’s none of your business,” is the blunt reply.
Stark tilts up his head, gaze pinned to Miguel’s mask. “You know, I’m not really minded to give away proprietary technology to a man wearing a wrestling mask in broad daylight.”
There’s a stalemate between the two men as they stare each other down (or up in Stark’s case). The showdown is silent, you can practically feel the tumbleweeds rolling by, waiting to see who’s going to draw first.
“He can take his mask off,” you interject.
At your offer, Miguel’s eyes narrow, nose turning up in the air in a put off gesture, refusing to do as he’s told.
“Mig,” you warn, and despite the clear scowl etched onto the features of his mask, this time, he complies.
The blue and red fabric recedes into nothingness, until the fierce cut of his bare jawline is revealed. Eyes glowing an angry crimson.
The scowl on Miguel's face is so ferocious, you can see his fangs in clear view. But instead of scary. Instead of intimidating. He looks... almost cute. All you see in front of you is a teething puppy with no real bite. He's harmless.
Stark makes a low whistling sound at the dramatic reveal of Miguel’s face. “Didn’t expect the fifth member of One Direction under there.”
Miguel glares at the man, even though you know fully well that he doesn’t understand the pop-culture reference that’s being made.
“So let’s take this from the top,” Stark says, and he starts to pace the length of the room until he reaches the arc reactor and gives the display case a light smack like he’s tapping the rear of a mare.
“You need my arc reactor, but you won’t tell me why, and you’re not offering me anything in return, except for El Tigre over here not trying to kill me, is that about right?”
“What’s your price?” Miguel asks, voice in that low growling tone that always precedes a threat.
“I’m a multi-billionaire, cash doesn’t really interest me, and I can’t exactly have this fall into the wrong hands.”
“We’re not bad people, and we’re not going to use it for anything nefarious. I know this sounds absolutely nuts, but we need your arc reactor to save the world,” you say.
Stark chuckles at you, the way an adult would at a naive child. “That’s not really much to go on hon, you’re gonna have to give me more than that.”
“Wong, the Sorcerer Supreme, he can vouch for us.”
Stark considers you for a moment then tilts his head to take an appraising look of Miguel, eyes dragging from the sole of his suit-clad heels and up to his neck where the suit ends.
“The unstable molecule fabric you have for the suit is interesting. I’ve been meaning to give my suit an upgrade, and having it disappear into thin air would be convenient. Wouldn’t have to constantly lug around 2,000 pounds of metal everywhere I go with me. Hand me a sample of the tech along with full intellectual property rights and we’ll talk.”
“No.” Miguel says.
He straightens up his posture and crosses his arms over his chest with a haughty expression on his face. “My suit is technologically superior to all the technology you’ve got in this building combined. It’s a bum deal. Your arc reactor has palladium in it and would be poisonous for long term use. It’s practically defunct and I only need it for a one time use.”
God, this man really doesn’t know how to endear himself to anyone does he.
“He doesn’t mean that,” you step in.
“Well if it’s practically defunct, I wouldn’t want to pawn this junk off on you,” Stark responds, throwing up his hands in feigned defeat. “Besides, it has sentimental value to me. Not sure I’m willing to just give this away to some random guy who broke into my house.”
Miguel’s lip twitches in irritation until you see another flash of those fangs like they’re itching to sink into Stark’s throat.
That only seems to entertain Stark further. “Look, you clearly need this reactor for something big, and for some reason you’re not able to build it yourself even with your advanced tech on display here. You’re obviously in a hurry, and in a desperate situation. Desperate enough to break in, and you know the saying: beggar’s can’t be choosers. I wouldn’t be much of a businessman if I didn’t take advantage of that.”
Miguel narrows his eyes, glancing around at the electronic equipment stored in the corner of the room. “I need you to throw in the laser scalpel along with the 3d printer and genetic sequencer,” he says, cocking his head in its direction.
“Wow, toots, your boyfriend has real expensive taste,” Stark teases.
Your cheek warms at the term boyfriend, but you don’t correct him.
Neither does Miguel. Instead Miguel looks him squarely in the eyes and juts up his chin. “I want the Sonic disruptor too.”
“Fine,” Stark announces, holding up his hand in the gesture of a time-out to stop Miguel from listing out more expensive items. “You drive a hard bargain, Blue, but what the hell. It’s a deal. I’ll even give you a newer palladium-free model of the reactor so I can keep old sparky here for myself.”
The sun is setting against the skyline of the city, washing it in strokes of warm amber-orange hues. Miguel is still grumbling next to you as the two of you stroll along the Brooklyn bridge.
“Supergenius, Ha! Si los zombies comen cerebros, él sería invisible para ellos. What do you see in that guy anyway?! He’s not even good looking. He’s like what? 5 feet tall? He was wearing built in heels, you know! Es más corto que las mangas de un chaleco–”
"Can you pipe down?” you say, cutting off his tirade, “Just let it go, please. It's been hours! I didn’t see anything in him. I have no desire to be the next notch on Tony Stark's bedpost.”
That finally seems to end his rant, or at the very least slow it down. Miguel shuts his mouth, staring out over the river. “Then why did you tell him you were free?”
“Because I wanted the arc reactor! I figured letting the guy flirt with me might help. Catching flies with honey and all that.”
He folds his arms over his chest, with a skeptical furrow in his brows. “You wanted him to take you somewhere fancy; that’s what you said,” he points out.
Damn him and his super-genius memory.
“Well, maybe I also wanted to eat at a Michelin star restaurant one time in my life. Manila Social Club is supposed to have a golden donut made with champagne jelly and actual gold on their dessert menu.
“That doesn’t even sound tasty,” Miguel mutters, shoving his hands into his pockets. His mouth settles into an unhappy frown.
“It would have been if I didn’t have to pay for it!”
“I could’ve gotten it for you,” he says, and it’s not until you take a better look at his face that you realize it’s not so much as a frown he’s sporting. It’s a pout.
Oh, is he… ? He is, isn’t he!
“You have nothing to be jealous of, you know. I’m not interested in Tony Stark,” you reassure him.
In front of you, the rigidness in his shoulder seems to melt at your words.
That surprises you. You’d have expected him to deny the accusation that he’s jealous. Adamantly object that he wasn’t, and why would he be, you’re nobody to him. Just a random stranger that happens to look like his wife that he cannot leave well enough alone.
He doesn’t do that though. Instead, his only response is a quiet, “Okay.”
His docileness takes you by surprise.
Is he admitting that he was jealous?
You'd be lying to yourself if you said that you didn't take even a morsel of enjoyment in the comical way that Miguel is getting himself riled up over you. To have him flustered and openly jealous of Tony Stark flirting with you.
As if Miguel had anything to worry about.
As if Tony Stark, a man who has ‘philandering philanthropist’ as a description for himself on his twitter bio, isn't known to be so indiscriminately flirtatious he’d eagerly court a voluptuously shaped tree.
As if that man of 5 foot 6 (with platform shoes) would ever hope to occupy every one of your thoughts the way Miguel does.
Immature and childish and inane as your behavior back at Stark Tower was—and you feel mildly ashamed of it now—you’d be lying if you said you didn’t enjoy it in the moment. Not because Tony Stark, multi-billionaire, GQ's Most Eligible Bachelor five years running, was flirting with you.
No. Because for a moment you got to experience what it was like to have your rude protective Spiderman treat you as his girlfriend. Someone he was possessive of. Someone he treasures. Someone that is his. Instead of your current reality, where you know he belongs to someone else entirely.
“If anyone has anything to be jealous of, don’t you think it should be me?” you say, the words slipping out of your mouth before you can reign them back in.
Miguel tilts his head, regarding you like a cute, confused pup, so you continue.
"Because I could never compete with her, right?"
"Her?" he asks, seeming genuinely puzzled.
"Your version of me," you say, "your Nena." You try to smile, try to keep it light-hearted, like the funny joke you had meant it to be, but it hurts even just to hear yourself say it. Because you know it's not a joke.
It's true. You’re in love with a man whose affections aren't yours to win.
Miguel stops in his tracks, and that makes you stop as well.
"It's not a competition," he says seriously. "You're two different people. You can't compare like that.”
You feel like you’re being scolded and probably rightly so. You’re being childish and unreasonably trying to compare yourself to his dead wife. But that doesn’t mean that it makes it hurt any less to hear you don’t compare at all. Your heart fissures and cracks, and the first sting of tears starts to well up behind your eyes.
"You're important to me too," he continues.
The words stop your heart, your eyes dart up to his face. The look on his face is gentle and soft, and it soothes the pain in your chest away, a gentle warmth rising to take its place.
“Oh,” you say. You can’t help but smile up at him, squinting against the bright sun behind his back.
“You’re important to me too,” you tell him.
His lips quirk up into a small but genuine smile at your response. “Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
You nod, and then you have to turn away, feeling bashful under his attentive gaze. Embarrassed heat prickles your cheeks, and you need a second to catch your breath and let the evening breeze cool you down.
There are cyclists and pedestrians going past you as the two of you continue to walk in silence. You sneak a look at him to see that, like you, he’s turned away. He’s gazing out over the bridge as he walks and against the amber sun, you see a faint flush riding high on his cheeks.
Your fingers lightly brush against the side of his hand, and he turns back to you and smiles, sliding his pinkie to hook around yours.
You walk all the way home this way, heart feeling full, and you think to yourself that maybe, this time, things really are going to be okay after all.
~ Next issue
Author's note: So for fellow marvelheads checking, wouldn't Tony be dead after Endgame when Wong was made Supreme Sorcerer? This is another version of earth -- Thanos and the snap never happened. My baby Tony isn't dead how dare you!
The Spanish in this chapter has been left untranslated on purpose, so that it’s left ambiguous whether reader speak/understand Spanish. The idea is that if you as a reader understand it, then so does the reader, and vice versa 🥰
Dedication & Credits: To @guruan for her incredibly kind help and donating her time to check the Spanish used in this chapter.
And to the kind @forwantofwill and her generosity for doing this beautiful fanart of Miguel Folding Origami that has stolen my heart!!
And finally to @thirstworldproblemss I love you and hope you're eating all the yummy sukiyaki that you deserve. Thank you for coming with me on this wild ride.
#miguel o'hara x reader#miguel o'hara x you#miguel o'hara fic#miguel o'hara#miguel o'hara fanfic#miguel o'hara fanfiction#spiderverse#oscar isaac#across the spiderverse#marvel#spiderverse fanfiction#imguel ohara x reader#miguel ohara#miguel ohara x you#marvel mcu
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ok so my friends and i spent a large amount of time discussing whether the invisible creature can pass the harkness test which led to a discussion of what other non-humans in the podcast can ethically be fucked which led to us categorizing stuff
so i present to you
malevolent fuckability tier list
full transcription, tier explanation and stuff below
MILFS tier - gotta pay respect to the lades: shub, the witch, mother darkness (will add lilith once she gets some action)
there are basically no not fucked up humans on this tier list cos it's a) boring and b) this is a creechurs, places and concepts tier list
everyone above grey area passes the harkness test so they can be ethically and consentualy fucked
onto the tiers!
KIY tier - he's a mandatory entry on everyones sex tourism, seeing as he's being fucked over for four seasons straight, also i'm biased towards my dear wife
FUCK YEAH tier - can give enthusiastic consent and be into it: larson, the moss cave from ep 15, horig, prison guards (if they can be employed they can be fucked), lorick, yorick, grand vizier from ep 40 (the tentacle-face thing that was parroting john), scratch, kayne, the three soldiers, mr faust, the dancers (mentioned in ep 20 as the kings heralds, same logic as the prison guards), malam, the creature from the labyrinth in ep 17, the hand of malevolence (can not speak but is literally a perfect toy and is an object), the trader from the dreamlands, that person that was hiding in the mines on the rafters in ep 27
ZOO BUT IT'S OK ACTUALLY tier - butcher is a dog but that won't stop anyone
HEAR ME OUT tier - it's hot if you're not a coward: the forest from ep 14, the dreamlands desert, the big cave, the ship in the desert from ep 15, the dreamlands as a whole, hyadies, greystone, blackstone, the sandstorm, the plateu, the a-frame ceiling from maries house, the wallussy (ep 41 and whatever glory hole in the tavern arthur was looking through at his past self when kayne was explaining the malevolent cinematic universe in intermenzzo), the fog from ep 8, the crystalizer of dreams
HARKNESS TEST GREY AREA tier - we could not determine if they'd be able to consent due to the states of awareness they're in being unclear: uncle (does not speak and seems to have a child-like behaviour at times), the invisible monster from the mines in s3 (can speak but poorly, might be larsons daughter, unclear if it retains speech once disconnected from the people it feeds on), the wraith from s1 (seems out of it mostly), the things arthur said were similar to the devils from the bible in ep 14 in the forest (not clear on what intelligence they poses), the eye tentacle monster from ep 9 (also unclear)
ZOO tier - creatures that have intelligence closer to that of an animal: the widow from ep 8 (she was a mindless ghoul at that point), the two policeman from ep 9 (and all policeman in general), the thousand young, the hound of tindalos from ep 5 (the fucked up fractal dog), the rats that chased arthur in the hotel in ep 10, the spider from that same hotel, thhe snake-electric eel thing from the boat in the dreamlands ep 15, the maggots (season 5), owlexander (he's sus but until further notice will remain in this category), the worm things taht burrowed in oscars arm in ep 37, the tadpoles from the river/lake from ep 11
NECRO tier - frank (more specifically his corpse in ep 18), mr faust again, the prince (dead and delirious). excluded from this tier were arthurs corpse and parkers corpse for the lack of screenshotable transcriptions
#malevolent#malevolent podcast#tier list#the funny#will be updating with new episodes#if i forgot some creechur please let me know#also would love to hear your hear me outs
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Matched: Chapter 10 - The Little Family
Characters: Jake Kiszka x Thea Foster Warnings: 18+ as always. Fluff. Pregnancy. Mentions of child birth. Smut. Allusions to sex. A/N: Final chapter is here! It's a shorty but a goodie. Thank you for tagging along on this journey, but we ain't done with this world just yet! ;)
A couple months into the tour, we found out we would be expecting a boy to which everyone was thrilled about, including myself. Henry Francis would soon be coming into this world. My dream is slowly coming true. I’m married to the love of my life and having a baby boy, the first boy of the trio that we both want.
As her pregnancy progressed, we were all taking extra precautions. One of us, if not all of us, were constantly checking in on her and making sure that she and the baby were doing alright. Most days she spent on the bus or the hotel room to rest due to back pain or swollen feet.
And it wasn’t until we made it to New York when things started to change.. The tour ended the night before with an electric send off. Today all of us decided to head out to the zoo, do something fun before we head back to Nashville.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” I ask as I help her tie on her shoes.
“Yes, I’m fine.” Thea sighs as she rubs her stomach. “He’s just been moving so much, it’s making me highly uncomfortable.”
“And you’re sure walking around like this is also okay?”
“Yes, Jake,” She giggles. “I need to move. I’m getting tired of being cooped up in here all the time. I’ve missed half your shows because of the nausea and back pain. I’m sick of it.”
I help her stand from the bed and she straightens out her clothes.
“Plus, if I stay here any longer, I’m going to go insane..”
I chuckle and kiss her forehead. “Alright then come on.. The guys are waiting downstairs in the van.. Josh is way too eager to go see the monkeys.”
Thea giggles and slides on her sweater. “That’s because he is one..”
That he is..
On the elevator ride down, I can see her holding the side of her stomach as she winces. “Are you okay?” I ask.
She nods her head. “Yeah.. He’s just testing out his soccer skills apparently..”
I chuckle and press my hand to her stomach. “Hey little man, relax there. Mama’s not your soccer ball.” She smiles and rests her hand over mine.
The doors open and we step out to join the guys in the lobby of the hotel. “Hey pretty mama!” Josh exclaims as he gives Thea a hug. “Finally getting out for some fresh air.”
“Yeah, finally.. I don’t feel like my back is going to break every time I stand.”
“Well I’m glad you could join us today. How is the baby?” He asks as he leads her out of the hotel.
“Forget the baby, how are you?” Danny says as he steps beside me. We walk out of the hotel together with Sam following close behind with Rose. “Getting much sleep at all?”
I blow out a breath and roll my eyes. “Here’s a little tip for you, Daniel.. Don’t get a woman pregnant.”
Danny laughs and slaps me on the back. “Not for a long while,” He says. “I’m still in my prime brother.”
“Shut the fuck up..” I say rolling my eyes.
“But seriously, how are you?”
“I’m exhausted.. She wakes me up in the middle of the night to get her food.. Food we don’t have.. And then because I told her we don’t have it and the hotel kitchen is closed–and half the city–she gets so angry with me, as if it’s my fault.”
Danny chuckles, shaking his head. “You’re a married man now, it will always be your fault.”
We made it through the whole zoo and back to the van before Thea started getting uncomfortable. “When we get back to the room, I’ll start a warm bath and give you a massage,” I tell her as I let her rest her head on my shoulder.
“I’m next after her,” Josh jokes from the front seat.
Suddenly Thea sits up, her hand clutching my thigh. “Jake..”
“Hmm?”
“We might not be making it to the hotel.”
Josh turns back around in the front seat to face us. “Why are we not making it to the hotel?”
“Umm.. I think..” She swallows and looks up at me with nervous eyes. “I think my water broke.”
Sam and Danny lean forward behind us. “You think?” Sam asks.
“Have you been having any contractions at all?” I ask as I turn in the seat.
“No.. But if I peed my pants, then it was a lot,” She nervously laughs.
“We’ll take you still,” Josh says. “Just to be sure.”
A couple hours later after arriving at the hospital and getting her looked at, I’m heading back out to the waiting room. My heart is pounding but a huge grin is plastered on my face. Josh is the first to see me when I walk through doors and he stands to his feet. “What’s the verdict?”
“Guess we’re having the baby today,” I say, shrugging my shoulders. “But we have absolutely nothing with us here. It’s all back on the bus.”
“Don’t worry, we’re on it.” He says.
“Oh hey Sam,” I say, grabbing his arm. “Do you mind calling Mom and filling her in?”
He smiles and nods his head. “Of course,” He says. He wraps his arms around me, pulling me in for a hug. “Congrats brother.”
I chuckle and hug him back. “Thank you. But I gotta head back to the room.”
“Hey Jake?” I hear Josh call as I start heading back to the room. I turn around and he’s running up to me and throwing his arms around me. “I’m so happy for you,” He says over my shoulder before pulling away. “Now go have a baby.”
“Thank you.” I say before pulling away completely and going back to the room.
Labor went by quickly and before we both knew it, she was ready to push. “Don’t make me do it.” Thea begs as she holds tightly to my hand.
I smile and kiss her forehead. “You can do it,” I say. “I know you can.”
“I’m scared, Jake.”
“I know you are, but I promise, everything is going to be okay.”
And the birth followed quickly after that. Just as we both predicted, we have our baby boy. His cries filled the room as they placed them on her chest. “Are you crying?” Thea giggles as she looks up at me with tears in her eyes as well. I couldn’t form any words so I opted to nod my head. “You have your boy, Jake.” She says.
Standing by the nursery window, I’m joined by Josh. He wears a proud smile and pulls me in for a hug. “Can’t believe that you’re a dad!” He exclaims. “Now show me which one is yours.” He says, turning us back to face the window.
“Second row, third one from the right.”
“Shut up..” He gasps when he spots the blue cap on the baby’s head.
I eagerly nod my head. “Henry Francis. A whopping six pounds exactly.”
“Damn.. I owe Danny twenty bucks.”
“You were betting on my son’s weight?”
“As if you and Thea didn’t.”
I shrug my shoulders. “I was off by seven ounces.”
Josh chuckles and shakes his head. “Can I hold him? Or do I have to wait?”
I tap on the window, catching the nurses’ attention. She smiles and nods her head before going over to the bassinet. She picks up Henry and carries him out to us in the hallway. She hands him off to me and I turn to face Josh.
“Uncle Joshy,” I say. “Meet your godson, Henry.”
“You made me godfather?”
“Seems only right to do so.”
I carefully hand Henry to Josh. “Six pounds is so tiny.” He chuckles. Henry grunts, his face twisting. “Oh, I’m sorry, I’m sorry. Too loud? Yeah, I get that a lot.” Josh looks away from the baby and at me. “How’s Thea doing?”
“Pretty good, super exhausted.”
“Gee, I wonder why,” Josh chuckles. “Is she asleep?”
“Yeah, I told her I’d keep an eye on Henry while she sleeps. She’s afraid of bringing home the wrong baby.”
“Can’t say that I blame her.” Josh says.
Seeing him standing there and holding my kid just doesn’t feel real. None of us imagined us with kids anytime soon. I sure didn’t, until I met Thea. I thought all that was gone for a while there. Believed it. But I finally got her back. And this is where we ended up. Married and building our own little family.
“Besides, you can’t deny that he is your kid,” Josh continues. “He’s got your nose.”
“I spy a tiny, little guy,” I hear Sam say. Turning around, I see him and Danny coming down the hall with a few balloons. “Hi buddy,” He coos as he tickles Henry’s side. Henry squirms slightly in Josh’s arms.
“Knock it off, you’re upsetting him.” Josh says as he swats Sam’s hand away.
“Am not.”
“Are too.”
“Both of you knock it off.” Danny says as he sets the balloons on the floor and removes Henry from Josh’s arms. “The last thing we need is for him to learn on his second day of life that you two are nuts.” He cradles him in his arms and fixes the hat on his head. “He needs at least one stable uncle.”
“And what makes you think you’re the stable one?” Sam quips.
“I’m not the one arguing over upsetting him.”
The nurse comes back out to the hall. “It’s time to be fed,” She says as she scoops the baby out of Danny’s arms. “Pops, are you ready?”
Sam opens his mouth to start saying stuff but I immediately stop him. “With a bottle, dumbass.” I say before following the nurse back into the nursery. I pop my head back out into the hall and sternly point my finger at them. “Do not bother Thea.”
–Three Days Later–
“Is it really safe to have a three day old baby on a tour bus?” Josh asks as he lugs a couple bags onto the bus.
“Probably not but we have to make do with what we got,” I say as I help Thea to the back of the bus.
“Baby is officially on board!” Sam exclaims as he steps onto the bus.
“Would you keep quiet?” Danny scolds. “Last thing we need is for your big mouth to wake the baby.”
I step out of the back room and carefully take the carrier away from Sam. “You wake him, I’ll kill you.”
“Language,” Sam playfully gasps.
I roll my eyes and carry the baby to the back and already Thea is fast asleep. I chuckle and set the carry down on the floor to grab a blanket to cover her up. Hearing little noises coming from the carrier, I look down to see Henry stirring, his face scrunching up. Bending down to unbuckle him, I carefully lift him out and rest him against my chest.
“Welcome to the tour bus buddy,” I say as I gently sway from side to side as I gently pat his back. “We’ll be home soon and then you can sleep in your actual bed–after I get it put together.”
After a day on the road and a very sleepless night, we finally made it back home.
“Jake, are you sure I can’t help with anything?” Thea asks from the front door.
“Nope, I got it.” I say as I carry our suitcases up to the front door, including Henry’s suitcase. Apparently Josh decided he needed his own. He’s not even a week old yet, why would he need a suitcase?
“Jake..”
“I’ve got it,” I say as I stumble through the front door. “See?”
Thea rolls her eyes and goes back to the living room. “If your back hurts tomorrow, I don’t want to hear it.”
“As if it doesn’t already..” I grumble as I follow behind her. “He’s not even a week old and he’s already taking up space.. I was so far up against the wall of the bus the whole night. Felt like I was sleeping on a board.”
“Well now he’ll be in his own bed,” She says. “Once you get it put together.”
“Why do I have to put it together?”
“Because you volunteered.. And because you’re the daddy.”
I sigh and lay my head back against the couch. “Right.. Superdad,” I say, throwing my fist in the air. Pushing off the couch, I head upstairs to the guest room that we decided would be Henry’s bedroom. I stare at the box of the unassembled crib pieces and place my hands on my hips. This is going to take a while.
“I thought you were "Superdad".” Thea smirks as she leans against the doorframe.
“I was.. Until I started reading the instructions.” I hold up the instruction manual. “So I called in the brains.”
Sam pops up from behind the crib with a screwdriver in his hand. “That would be me.”
“And I see you stole the baby too?”
I look down at the sleeping baby in my lap and sucking on his pacifier. “Can’t steal what’s mine,” I wink at her. “Plus he was crying and you were asleep.”
“Kid’s got a set of lungs on him too.” Sam says as he steps out from behind the crib. “Alright “superdad”, help me with the mattress.”
Gently standing to my feet, I hand off Henry to Thea before going over to the mattress and helping Sam lift it into the crib. He proudly stands off to the side with his hands on his hips. “Well, I say we did a pretty damn good job, brother.” He says.
“Shall we test it out?”
“Well, I guess but I’m a bit big-”
“I meant the baby!” I quip as I slap my hand across his chest.
“Oh, right, the baby.”
Rolling my eyes, I turn back to Thea and take Henry back. He grunts a little, his face scrunching up. “Shh, shh, it’s alright,” I say as I rock him back and forth. “We’re gonna try out your new bed.” I carefully lat him inside the crib and watch him as he settles down and goes back to sleep.
“So I take it he likes the new bed.” Sam chuckles.
“This might be a good time to slip out.” Thea says.
The three of us quietly leave the bedroom and head back downstairs. “All of that crib building made me hungry.” Sam says as he heads for the kitchen.
Thea starts to follow after him but I grab her hand and pull her back to me. I looked around the corner to make sure that Sam was out of sight before I pulled her in for a kiss.
“What was that for?” She asks when we pull apart.
“Just wanted to show you how much I love you,” I say as I wrap my arms around her. “A lot’s changed in the last year between us and I couldn’t be happier. I’m married to the love of my life and we have a beautiful baby upstairs that we created together.” I pull her closer to me, pressing my hips into hers. “What if we left Sam to his own devices and went back upstairs?”
Thea laughs and straightens out of my shirt. “I just gave birth, Jacob. Give me some time.”
“Six weeks?” I wag my eyebrows.
“Stop your research.” She says, pointing a finger at me. “More than that.” She pulls away and starts going towards the kitchen.
“So how much time?”
She shrugs her shoulders as she turns back around. “A year.”
“A y–What?”
“You heard me.” “No sex for a year? That’s torture.” Thea only winks before turning on her feet again and going into the kitchen. “Dorothea!”
Thank you again for following along on this journey! Like I said, we are not done yet! Coming soon to devices near you, is the prequel? sequel? to Matched:
Jake kept a this journal for the six months left of his boat trip, recounting his adventures and writing them as if he were writing to Thea. The "letters" and postcards that were never meant to be sent. Now he gives them to Thea, wanting to be honest and open about his past as he fought to get over her and the love she never reciprocated at the time.
Release date: TBD
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#jake kiszka#greta van fleet#greta van fleet fic#greta van fleet fanfic#jake kiszka fanfic#jake kiszka fic#jake kiszka smut#gvf#matched
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FOX'S WEDDING, PART 7
KITSUNE!RENGUKO KYOJURO X FEM!READER
Summary: You and Kyojuro start working out for real and you are dying. Luckily, the rewards are damn good and worth it.
Warnings: Kissing
A/N: Female Reader, Kitsune Kyojuro, Kitsune Senjuro, Kitsune Rengoku, Monster Musume!AU
PART 1 II PART 2 II PART 3 II PART 4 II PART 5 II PART 6 II PART 7 II PART 8 II PART 9 II PART 10 II PART 11 II PART 12 II PART 13 II PART 14 II PART 15 II PART 16 II PART 17 II PART 18 II PART 19
Days went by and you or Kyojuro neither mentioned the fact that you had kissed him after going out on a date to a local zoo that was run by demihumans. The next morning when you woke up, you realized just that you had kissed your fiance for the first time and due to your embarrassment, you didn't mention it…
The problem was that Kyojuro didn't bring it up either, thinking that you needed time to figure out your feelings… Which you did, but he didn't need to be that consideration, dammit!
So the two of you circled around each other while maintaining healthy ways of living.
Senjuro, Kyojuro's little brother was honestly a blessing from God. The young fox would happily help you around the house, and no matter what needed to be done, he was helpful and willing to assist you the best way he could.
He would wake up with you or sometimes even earlier so he could help you prepare breakfast for you two and Kyojruo who ate like a horse. He would also help you with laundry, and then around the rest of the house, such as dusting the furniture or vacuuming and washing floors.
One day, about a week after your kiss with Kyojuro, you got a visitor. Someone had rung the doorbell and while you and Senjuro had your hand full, Kyojuro went to open it.
"Mister Smith!" The older Kitsune smiled at the sight of the human male, "Please, do come in! I'll ask my beloved bride to prepare us some tea!"
"Tea sounds great," The man in a dark suit nodded as he walked into the building and after taking his shoes off, he and Kyojuro walked to the living room where you and Senjuro were folding clean and dry laundry.
"Mister Smith!" You blinked as you put the shirt on your hands down and went to greet the man, "It's nice to see you! Would you like some tea or coffee?"
"Tea would be great." The man said and you nodded as you turned and went to put the electric kettle on and while it heated the water, you set the cups and took out your green tea.
"Kyojuro and Senjuro, would you like some tea also?" You asked over your shoulder as you put the cups down and Senjuro's head popped into view from behind the couch.
"Yes please, big sis!" The younger fox called and you glanced at Kyojuro who smiled and nodded, "Yes, please, my Hime!"
"Alright, thank you, four cups of tea coming!" You nodded before looking at the men, Kyojuro and Smith standing by the doorway, "Please take a seat and I'll prepare tea."
"As my beloved bride wants!" Kyojuro smiled and Mister Smith nodded as they took a seat, Senjuro soon joining them. Soon, the kettle was done and the water was boiling so you poured some hot water into cups where the green tea bags were. Once you were done with that, you sat on the table opposite Mister Smith.
"So…? What brings you here, Mister Smith?" You asked but you were smiling, already knowing the reason behind his visit. The man smiled as he reached for inside his jacket and pulled out red and yellow wallets.
"I'm here to deliver the royal Kitsunes' own debit cards!" The human male said as he handed Kyojuro the red wallet and the yellow one to Senjuro. The brothers blinked as they opened the wallets and saw small bundles of money and their very own bank cards.
"Wait, does this mean we can buy stuff now?" Senjuro asked as he glanced at Mister Smith who smiled as he sipped his tea and nodded, "Yes, young lord Senjuro. Lord Kyojuro's bride," He looked at you, "Requested that the two of you would get your own debit cards so you could buy things you want without her always being there."
"How thoughtful of my Hime!" Kyojuro exclaimed as he looked at you and smiled, "You are so kind!"
You blushed and tried to hide it by sipping your own tea, but you burned your tongue the second you sipped the drink. How Smith didn't burn his tongue, you didn't know.
"I just want you guys to be able to buy food you want or something else in case I can't be there with you." You explained and the fox brothers nodded, understanding your reasoning.
Mister Smith smiled as he pulled two cards from his pocket and slid them to the brothers, "So, here are the PIN codes you need to remember if you want to buy anything. Do not show or tell them to anyone else but yourselves in case someone would steal them."
"Understood!" Kyojuro nodded happily and Senjuro nodded also, copying his brother. Mister Smith nodded, pleased that the brothers accepted the new change happily, "Then, I wanted to come and ask about your relationship. You have been living together for almost 2 months already. How are you all getting along?"
"Oh, everything is perfect! Senjuro helps me around the house when Kyojuro goes out for his daily jogs, we went on a date a week ago to the new Zoo, and then we-!" You cut yourself off, remembering that kiss. You blushed and tried your tea which was much cooler already, but still hot.
Senjuro looked confused why you had turned quiet all of a sudden, while Kyojuro smiled as he held his tongue. Mister Smith nodded, seemingly satisfied with your reply and you were thankful that he didn't try to pry any further.
"I'm happy to see that all three of you can live in harmony. Many would fail when suddenly put in your shoes, but you have made it work with each other." The human male nodded as he finished his tea and got up, "Then, I will take my leave, you have my number, in any case, something happens."
"You're leaving already?" You asked, confused, but the man just smiled and nodded, "Yes, I have other families to visit and I'm already running late."
"I see. Well, thank you for your help!" You nodded and you and the brothers wished the human male a good day as he took his leave and left the house.
You were extremely pleased that Mister Smith was able to bring the brothers' debit cards. They were old enough to buy stuff without you monitoring them or their money use. You smiled as you looked at them, "Now you two can buy anything you want, like food, books, movies, or such, without having to have me there."
"But I like having you keep me company!" Kyojuro exclaimed suddenly and you blushed as you frowned a little, "I can't be always with you, Kyojuro. What if you were on your daily jog but got hungry all of a sudden? This way you can walk into the closest convenience store and buy yourself something to eat."
"I…" Kyojuro nodded slowly, "I understand your point."
"Can I…" Senjuro started carefully, "Can I buy myself books and movies I'm interested in?"
"Of course!" You nodded happily, "Just don't use a fortune!"
The three of you were all smiles as you talked about the books and movies Senjuro was interested in. Based on what you had seen Senjuro read, he favored many different genres, so maybe he liked different movies also? When you were all finished with your teas, you got up to take everyone's cups but as you reached for Kyojuro's cup you felt something in your back crack and you flinched in pain.
"Ouch…!" You groaned and the fox brothers noticed your flinch immediately.
"Is everything alright, my Hime?" Kyojuro asked and you waved your hand in a carefree manner, "Oh, just my back acting up. I should probably stretch and maybe exercise or otherwise move more."
"Why won't you join big brother for his jog?" Senjuro suddenly asked and you blinked in confusion, "But I just did a little over a week ago?"
"No, I mean, for his afternoon jog, not morning. That way the two of you can spend more time together…" Senjuro looked down and frowned a little, "The two of you have been a little… I don't know if distant is the right word, it's like something happened between you two?"
You and Kyojuro flinched. Had it been that obvious that you were feeling a little nervous around each other? The two of you glanced at each other, your eyes meeting before you looked at Senjuro again.
"I'm sorry if we worried you Senjuro." Kyojuro apologized and you nodded, "We didn't mean to. I assure you, everything is okay between me and your big brother. We aren't fighting, we aren't mad, sad, or anything like that."
"Then… What happened?"
You bit your lip nervously and before Kyojuro could tell the truth, you exclaimed, "You know what? You are right Senjuro!" You turned to look at Kyojuro with a little forced smile, "If it's okay with you, I would like to join you on your jog!"
"I would be honored!" The older Kitsune exclaimed himself and the two of you were all smiles so Senjuro wouldn't worry again. The young fox wasn't that young, but he still shouldn't be worried about what was going on between his big brother and his bride.
The next day came quickly, breakfast went by, followed by lunch, and soon enough it was time for your and Kyojuro's afternoon jog. You liked Kyojuro, you really did, but you despised exercising.
"Kyojuro?" You called your fiance's attention as the two of you were stretching before the jog you were going to take. The older Kitsune hummed as he turned to look at you and you winched already, "You know I'm in bad shape, don't you? So, how about we make a small run around the block and call it a day?"
You knew you were shamelessly trying to swindle your way out of the jog to the park and back, but you had a feeling your words had no effect on the Kitsune because that smile of his didn't go anywhere. No, it grew wider.
You knew you were shamelessly trying to swindle your way out of the jog to the park and back, but you had a feeling your words had no effect on the Kitsune because that smile of his didn't go anywhere. No, it grew wider.
"In that case, we can stop by the park to rest and I'll teach you some good basic exercise moves to strengthen your body and mind!" He shouted happily and you groaned out loud in defeat, but your whining and complaining fell to deaf fox's ears.
"Now, let's go!" Kyojuro cheered and you grumbled but despite your sour attitude, you followed after your fiance. It was clear that Kyojuro was taking it easy for you, slowing down and cheering you on, but as you thought earlier, you were in really bad shape… Yet you still made it to the park and to the familiar bench where you had talked with Kyojuro and asked him out on a date.
The two of you sat on the bench, or you more likely collapsed on it. You were panting hard as you tried to fix your irregular breathing. Kyojuro was all smiles as he handed you the familiar water bottle and you drank almost half of the bottle.
"Carefully my beloved! I don't want you to choke!" Kyojuro said happily and you lowered the bottle and glanced at the fox next to you, "I don't know how you do this every day Kyojuro!"
"I do take weekends off so my body can rest!" He nodded and you grumbled at the idea of jogging like this almost every day. The two of you rested in silence so you could catch your breath, but there were other things taking over your mind.
How you shared both of your own families' backgrounds with each other on this very bench and how you asked him out on a date… Followed by a kiss before nighttime.
Once your breathing was even, you prepared yourself mentally for this conversation. You turned to look at your fiance and carefully started, "Kyojuro…?"
"Yes, my precious Hime?" He asked as he looked at you and you tried your hardest to keep eye contact but you found your gaze wandering to your hands.
"There is… Something I want to talk about…" You said carefully and he smiled, "About what?"
"About…" You swallowed nervously, "What happened a week ago…"
"Yes?" He nodded and you felt your mouth dry, "I… Uh…"
"Hm?" He just smiled wider and you had enough.
"Ah, never mind, forget it." You shook your head, trying to shake off that blush that burned your cheeks so viciously. Instead, you asked, "What's next, boss?"
"Now, we start with some simple exercises!" He said as he happily jumped up on his feet and you whined, "Nooo…!"
"Yes!" Kyojuro smiled, "Now get up and I'll show you the right stretching and then we can start!"
"You're a demon…!" You groaned and the damn fox had the guts to laugh at you, "A Yokai actually! Now, up!"
You did as your fiance told you to and he showed you how to stretch and you followed his example. Then came the fun part. The real exercises, as you liked to call them.
The push-ups and lunges that he made you do and the blank he made you hold…!
It was brutal to poor little you who barely moved or rather exercised besides the housework and visiting the grocery store, and now that you had Senjuro helping you with housework and Kyojuro carrying your heavy grocery bags, you moved even less.
Now, finally, he had you on your back on grassy ground with your feet pinned to the same ground.
"Kyojuro…! I can't…!" You whined but he didn't take a no for an answer. No, he smiled and he held your legs, "You can do it! Just a couple of sit-ups and we are done and can go buy something to drink!"
"No…!" You whimpered, "I can't…!"
"Do this and I'll give you a reward!"
"No reward is worth this!" You cried out in a mixture of pain and frustration. Your body was hurting from being pushed to the limit and you were frustrated because you wanted to match Kyojuro's expectations.
"I can't…"
"Just try one time! If you don't like it, you can stop!"
"I already know I won't like it!"
"You never know unless you try!" Kyojuro was still smiling and believing in you, even if you were acting like a petty brat. You both hated and loved it.
You shut your eyes as you growled, giving in and using all the strength your abdominal muscles possessed and you somehow managed to lift your upper body up and against your bent knees. That's when you felt something touch the top of your head. As you went back down you opened your eyes, confused.
"What-?" You blinked and Kyojuro smiled, no, he absolutely beamed in joy, "You did it! Can you do it again?"
"I-!"
"I know you can do it!"
How the Hell could you not try when he was being your biggest cheerleader at the moment? You groaned as you closed your eyes and forced yourself up again and-!
It happened again! Something touched you but your forehead this time! You opened your eyes as you went back down and you saw Kyojuro smiling down at you.
You blinked, confused, "Did you just…?"
"What?" He seemed genuinely clueless. Maybe you just imagined it, "Ah, nothing…"
"You're doing so well! Do you think you can do one more?" He asked and you groaned as you put the hands behind your head and pushed-!
You opened your eyes as you felt something press against your lips and you saw Kyojuro, kissing you. You felt your eyes widen in shock and your muscles ache and give up, making you fall back on the ground. You were staring at the Kitsune and he chuckled as he grinned, "How did you like your rewards?"
Wait, those were your rewards? You were sweaty and gross and he still kissed you willingly? He… Wanted to kiss you?
"Do you want to do a couple more sit-ups or are we done here?" Kyojuro asked and you stared at him for a second before blushing.
"It depends…" You mumbled in embarrassment, averting your gaze because you couldn't stand to look him in the eyes, "Does it mean that I won't get any rewards in the future if I won't do more sit-ups…?"
"I promise you, I won't stop no matter what! Not anymore!" He said happily and you were feeling both so happy and embarrassed because of how open he was about his feelings… But you didn't hate it.
"Then, can you help me up? I don't think I can move anymore." You groaned weakly and Kyojuro nodded as he got up on his feet and offered his hand to you. You accepted his help, and he yanked you up with one single pull. You were reminded at that moment just how freakishly strong the Kitsune really was.
"Would you like us to go and buy you something to drink? I'm afraid my water bottle is empty!" The fox asked and you nodded. Your throat felt absolutely parched and you could use something to drink.
As the two of you prepared to leave the park, you found yourself suddenly craving something more than just water, soda or any health drink there was. You slowed down and Kyojuro stopped when he felt your hand pull the back of his red tracksuit.
"What is it, my Hime?"
"About my rewards…" You mumbled quietly, not quite daring to look him in the eyes, "You said you wouldn't hold back anymore…?"
"Yes!" He nodded, smiling proudly.
"Then… Can I have one proper one now?" You asked as you glanced at him bashfully and his smile grew if that was even possible, "Whatever my precious bride needs!"
You felt like your heart could have burst out of your chest as Kyojuro gently placed his palm on the back of your neck and looked at you deep into your eyes. As he leaned in, you closed your eyes, suddenly feeling too vulnerable or self-conscious under his gorgeous eyes.
Finally, his lips touched yours and you couldn't help but smile. He kissed you because he liked- No, because he loved you and wanted this just as much as you did.
Why had you stopped kissing him after your first kiss in front of his room? Because you regretted it? No, you were embarrassed by yourself but now you were sure you had no reason to feel that way anymore.
He had called you with many names and all of them were endearing, some even overly sweet. He was unlike anyone you had ever seen before and you loved it.
As you two pulled apart, you opened your eyes and grinned. "So, all I need to do from this moment forward is to ask and you will kiss me?"
"Yes!" Kyojuro nodded enthusiastically, "Only if you want me to!"
"In that case…" You smiled a little, "You can always ask for a kiss too. If you want one, I mean?"
"Then can I have one right away?" He asked and you nodded, but just as you were about to kiss-!
"WO HOO!"
"GET A ROOM!"
The two of you jumped apart and you turned to look and saw some random guys laughing at the two of you. You grounded your teeth together, wanting to throw a stone at them or shout at them at least, but you didn't want to look bad in front of your fiance.
After all, the two of you had been so into each other that you had forgotten that you were in a public place, in the middle of the park on a sunny day… Where anyone could see you two kissing each other.
You and Kyojuro glanced at each other and you smiled, "So, that drink? Are you offering?"
"I do have a money card now so I can buy you things you might want or need!" He said happily and you smiled, "Lead the way."
#rengoku#rengoku x reader#rengoku kyojuro#rengoku senjuro#monster musume!au#monster musume#demon slayer#kimetsu no yaiba#reader#reader insert#kitsune#nine tailed fox#writing#my writing#story#my story#kissing#ENJOY!
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Accessibility: In the last 10 days I visited the San Francisco Zoo and Safari West.
Surprisingly, unlike the rest of the city, the SF Zoo was relatively flat. I used a wheelchair the whole time with no issue. There's a bit of a slope at the entrance but that's basically it. They even have lower unobstructed viewing areas for people in wheelchairs (or kids I guess). I do think it's fucked up that places are allowed to charge to rent a wheelchair, though.
Safari West you're carted around in a vehicle, so as long as you're able to get into the vehicle it's accessible. There's a small walking portion at the end, including through an aviary. It was on a slight slope but nothing crazy. Personally I didn't have any issues getting around it, and I have a lot of mobility issues.
I have been to both of these places, and agree with your assessments!
Some of Safari West - near the cabins - is a dirt road, but unless you’re staying overnight there most guests won’t encounter that. What I don’t know is if/how the safari carts are for people in wheelchairs (I assume you have to transfer), because I didn’t end up going on the standard vehicles.
San Francisco was pretty easy to traverse. Some of the current construction made navigation a bit messy, and it’s also a big site, but pretty flat with good path maintenance iirc.
Yeah, I wish wheelchair and electric scooter rentals were cheaper or subsidized, but it’s the reality of running a business. They get damaged and need to be repaired and replaced, and paying for them I think encourages people to be more careful. Some of the prices are feel like extortion though, and zoos rarely have enough of either available on a given day. (Shoutout to The Living Desert for having the most ECVs I’ve ever seen at a zoo, and they have shade canopies!).
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My Review of Livesies
Really Jack? You chose this face? You look both angry and confused! 👆
Set: understandable, considering that it’s confined to a stage. Favorite set piece is probably the famous newsstand that they get their picture taken from.
Music: why the new lyrics? The old ones were just fine! Why the electric guitar?
Crutchy acts more naive, why so dumb? ‘You wanna bust yer odda leg too?’ Yes Cruchy, why?
Yeah Jack, you’re totally 17 Jeremy 😑
Everyone’s accent: good, Jeremy’s accent: x100
So Jack goes from wanting a family to roping Crutchy into a fantasy life out west and then he completely abandons him later?
In 92sies it focuses on Jack and him interacting with the other Newsies, whereas here it’s Jack wanting to get away so badly that it’s all he literally talks about.
Race and Albert: both handsome and annoying
Albert steals Race’s cigar, so what they just forgot about Snipeshooter?
‘Bath time at the zoo?’ so I guess ‘we got woik to do’ just wasn’t good enough and they had to write something completely bonkers?
Right away: enter a bunch-a newsies that I don’t know and never get a chance to see their characters play out because they’re moving too fast. They completely erased some of the original characters and wrote in new ones that make me miss the old ones!
Romeo: is actually a character that sticks with me because he’s given personality
Enter Katherine: I just don’t like her. I never liked how Kara Lindsay portrayed her and always think she looks mad, confused, and dazed. 🤷♀️
Jack, if you’re so keen on leaving then why are you flirting with Katherine? You’re digging yourself into this!
In the dvd version they cut the ‘smile that spreads like butter,’ which I always wondered why.
I’m seeing all these newsies and don’t know who half of them are!
Elmer: introduced by nuns, another character I actually remember
LUV the added acro tricks!!!
I think it’s clear now why Jack’s not dancing. Good way to hide it, Jeremy!
‘What is that unpleasant aroma?’- Max did it better!
Race briefly mentions betting Jack against the Delancys and then never mentions gambling again. I guess half his original character is nothing?
Applause for the clean scene changes! 👏
Seriously Race what is this face? 👇
Race flirts with Weasel rather than gamble? Preposterous!
Enter Davey and Les- ‘I’m new too!’ I can tell that’s gonna get annoying…
Davey just wants his papes and nervously tries to escape the other newsies while Les is already introducing them and is already chummy with Jack
Les knows an awful lot about wages for a 10-year-old
Les in 92sies: shy, cute, innocent, curious Livesies Les: obnoxious, loud, cocky, hyper
Romeo and Albert on Pulitzer’s desk during the scene change is surprisingly funny
Hannah is so good!!! I don’t know why they emphasize on Katherine struggling to make it through work when Hannah already shows that a woman can get a good career.
Pulitzer is even more cocky, brash, and egotistical than Robert Duvall’s portrayal. Historically Pulitzer wasn’t that mean to the newsies.
‘Shave me too close and you could cut my throat.’ Sweeney Todd reference? 🪒
Hannah: ‘We don’t sell papers, newsies sell papers.’ Ummm Jack? Your line is ‘headlines don’t sell papes, newsies sell papes.’ Ya missed it! 🗞️
Pulitzer: Yes, 6-year-olds need to work harder let’s charge them more and they’ll thank me later.
I wonder if the dance choreographers just sat down and thought: ok, we need to think of every dance stunt that can be done with a newsboy hat and newspaper bag.
Davey and Les are bantering and then Les runs up- oh yeah, you’re still annoying.
Why is Jack so shaken up about hearing about Davey and Les’ folks? Other newsies got folks, so it ain’t like he’s never heard it before.
‘Come home with us!’ ‘Mom’s a great cook!’ All are potential suggestions for Jack to go meet the Jacobs, but no! Sarah apparently doesn’t even exist! The original story is about Jack seeing how happy the Jacobs family is and wanting a family too, but instead he’s an angry painter who just wants to leave without second thoughts.
Why does Snyder just taunt ‘Kelly!’ before he starts chasing him? You don’t call out and say you’re gonna attack before you attack!
Davey and Jack talk about the Refuge and then it’s never mentioned again after Crutchy gets taken. In the movie Jack goes and tries to break him out but Crutchy refuses. Here we got Jack not wanting anything to do with the Refuge even after Crutchy gets locked up!
Medda? Medda is on fire! I still luv her character in this, especially her feather hat! 💜💗
‘No kids allowed in the theatre!’ and yet she encourages Les to look at the Bowery Beauties for ‘educational’ purposes?
Les stares at the Beauties as if he’s never seen a girl before. He’s enthralled by their costumes and then Davey just waves it off
‘Where better to escape trouble than a theatre?’ truer words were never spoken, Miss Medda! 🎭
Jack is all like: screw being a cowboy, I’m a painter! 🤠🧑🎨
‘You’re on!’ ‘I am? How’m I doing?’ Nice way to break the 4th wall, Medda!
That’s Rich compared to Lovey Dovey Baby is hard because Anne Margaret’s performance is more dreamy and soft
Ok gotta say that Les and Davey’s faces poking out is very cute
Am I the only one who’s disappointed that we never get to see the full Bowery Beauties act?
‘Twice in one day! Think it’s fate?’ No, Jack. You’re stalking this poor girl!
Katherine just begs Jack to leave the box, whereas Sarah would just punch an intruder in the face. 👊
Never Planned On You, ummm why? First Jack wants to go to Santa Fe, then he likes Katherine after a 2-minute conversation? ‘Til I find someone new,’ umm how many girls have you dated, Jackie boy? In 92sies he never even mentions this kind of stuff.
In the next scene change whoever the newsies with no shirt on is, they are obviously trying to take away from 92sies Mush’s shirtless scene and I will not stand for it!
So now Race’s only personality trait is that he luvs cigars more than his mom? 🚬
‘LET THE MAN WORK IT OUT!’ Okayyyy it’s confirmed Les has anger issues
Everybody talks about how Crutchy’s smile spreads like butter, but when I see Ben Cook’s smile all I see is a ray of sunshine 😄
‘You need membership.’ ‘Whattya call these guys?’ 👋
Why is Jack president when Davey is doing all the talking?
The World Will Know is an introduction to Jeremy’s angry Jack, which conflicts with Christian Bale’s daydreamer Jack and Corey Cott’s sad Jack. In all honesty, angry Jack can get scary!
Again, why the electric guitar? 🎸
How does losing a shoe have to do with this song? 👞
So the scene after Jack, Davey, and Les walk into Pulitzer’s doors and then we get a shot of the newsies behinds, um… did they just give half the fansies what they wanted?
‘...HE’S GONNA BE BEG’N FOR AN APPOINTMENT TO SEE ME, YOU GOT THAT?!’ Jeez, calm down, Les! 😧
I do like how they made Jacobi’s like a newsies meeting place, I don’t know why it just fits
And behold, the reason behind why I know what a seltzer is! Thanks, Albert! 🥛
Tommy Boy, Finch, Buttons… this would be a lot more convincing if I knew who each newsie was!
‘But that Spot Colon gets me a little jittery.’ Oh yes, in the brief moments we see him in this musical we definitely get that vibe. Not! Spot’s barely in this!
Oh yay, Katherine’s back. And she still sounds confused and awkward, which I guess makes sense since she’s in a different atmosphere but after a while it gets annoying.
Ok right off the bat Katherine and Jack already have a toxic relationship because they are constantly fighting! They look like they wanna kill each other!
Now Jack’s all whiny and I don’t like it! The original Jack would not whine about a girl.
I always skip Watch What Happens because it’s just Katherine worrying. Again, I stand by my opinion of not liking Katherine. Where’s Denton? They could've had Katherine be his apprentice or something instead of just deleting him altogether!
I hear Watch What Happens and all I can think of is how much longer until I can hear Davey sing about how the poor guy’s head is spinning?
Ummm… WHERE’S BROOKLYN? There’s NO BROOKLYN? THEY TOOK MY FAVORITE SCENE IN THE WHOLE MOVIE AND CUT IT TO JUST ‘OH YEAH BY THE WAY WE WENT TO BROOKLYN,’ AND THAT’S IT?! No. No. NO! I will NOT stand for this! 😡
Les: ‘Are we doing the right thing?’ I donno kid, you seemed pretty confident yesterday. What happened?
Race: ‘That’s great! That’s pitiful.’ Race would never say that about Crutchy.
Gotta admit that the trio part of Davey, Jack, and Crutchy singing Seize the Day is pretty cool
Aaaaand angry Jack’s back. While the other newsies look hopeful Jack looks like he could commit murder. Whis is he always angry? 😳
I don’t know why but Davey standing on a pile of newspapers is hilarious! 😁
Ok finally time to start a swear count: bastards, asses, Hell�� sheesh this show’s got ‘such language!’
Uh why the awkward stomping? Just let Jeremy get offstage without the stomping so i can watch more twirling Sky and Ben?
Yeeesssss!!! Dancing on newspapers? BRILLIANT! I luv this part so much! 📰
Honestly not gonna lie if I was in the crowd I would be fighting to the death for one of the papes they throw out
Ha! I caught the spot of Race kicking himself in the face!!!
Seeing all these jumps, flips, and twirls is making me tired… God they must’ve been exhausted!
In the original, Jack wanted everyone out safely. But here I guess Jack wants to intentionally start a fight?
Why is Les being rolled around in a barrel? Then he sticks his head out, it’s like c’mon is this a cartoon?
Uh, Jack? CRUTCHY’S BEING BEATEN HELPLESS AND YOU’RE JUST WATCHING?! But it’s ok you’re gonna go sing about how mad you are and how you wanna leave so I guess it’s fine. ‘Save my best friend? Hell no let me abandon all the newsies!’ said Jack never!
Jack, you called Crutchy a ‘dumb crip?’ How could you do that?!
‘No more running, no more lying.’ Um, what have you been lying about? In the original, Jack lied about his parents and his name. Here Jack’s never called Francis Sullivan and he comes right out and says he’s got no folks. So what’s all this lying talk about?
Ahh! Please, no more angry Jack! I’d appreciate Jeremy’s performance and emotion if he didn’t look like has was gonna kill me!
Alright, Act 2… Where’s Jack? Oh right, instead of being in King of New York he’s sukling.
‘Jack don’t run from no fight!’ Apparently he does, since he’s working to buy a train ticket.
Here it comes… ‘erster.’ People either like it or hate it, I don’t mind it. Guess it adds to Race’s character since gambling’s out the window? ♠️♥️♣️♦️🃏
Whoa whoa whoa! Only Race can sing ‘a permanent box at the Sheepshead Races!’ Duh!
They replaced Spot’s porcelain tub with a sandwich? A sandwich?!
Thank you, Ben Cook, for gracing us with your sensational tap dancing!
Ok stop adding new lyrics and just skip to the tap dancing, please!
Never once did I ever think newsies would shout ‘spoon fight!’
The way Davey jabs ‘That’s it?’ at Katherine is priceless!
Just imagine the director looking at the cast and saying ‘now during scene changes the audience can’t be bored, so I need you to stall ‘em,’ and then the cast does a bunch-a random dance moves across the stage and the director says ‘perfect!’
Greetings from the Refuge is ok I guess, but I still wished Jack would actually try to get Crutchy out!
When I see Andrew’s messy hair I just picture him messing it up as the total opposite of keeping it nice-looking. Don’t know why, it’s just funny
‘Protect one anodda,’ Sure Crutchy, I’ll tell them before I run off to Santa Fe.
Even Medda points out how chicken Jack is!
It’s so cute how Davey perks up about being above the fold!
Les, please abstain from telling us about your date. It’s just annoying. ✋
Katherine: ‘You look like Hell.’ Heathers reference? ‘I just got back.’ ❤️💚💛💙
‘This go west young man routine is getting old.’ Is manifest destiny a joke to you, Kath?
More toxic relationship stuff, how is Jatherine a thing again?
‘The pooooor guy’s head is spinning!’ Yeeeessss! 🤣
‘And I’ve got a date!’ Shut up, Les.
Uh-oh, Katherine’s in trouble.
Jack Kelly, not Francis Sullivan? Are we just gonna go along with that?
Katherine, Pulitzer’s daughter? Why? Seriously what does that add?
Finally, the highlight of the show: Brooklyn’s Here! I really like how they added in this song! Brooklyn Bridge and all! Brooklyn gets their own ‘uniform,’ plus the fact that my crush on Spot Colon will rage on forever. I luv this song!
Um, where’s Smalls? Only she can sing ‘So’s tha Bronx!’
Sad that Spot makes this big entrance and then just stands intimidatingly in the background.
I like how Spot just casually waltzes up and then realizes ‘hey Jack, thanks for wasting my time!’ and then goes all murder-face on him!
Gee thanks Katherine for invading my penthouse and snooping through my drawings only to yell at me more.
Katherine’s scared to hit Jack and instead kisses him, but Sarah would never hesitate to soak a guy in the face!
So wait Jack goes to keep kissing Katherine and she backs out, even though she started it?
‘What if they came to newsies square?’ Where’s that, Kath? No one’s ever talked about that until now.
Jack points out dead-on that they need to talk about their relationship issues and Katherine just laughs.
O-K, I do NOT do sappy luv songs so let’s just skip Something To Believe In…
‘It’s good to have you back again!’ ‘Shut up!’ Gee really appreciative Jack, especially after you literally just betrayed everybody!
Darcy? Bill? Who? How are these guys just thrown in?
Once And For All… Pretty good… Ooh! Spot’s back! 😄
Wow that paper-tossing routine must’ve taken a while to perfect!
Again, why the electric guitar? It’s 1899 not 1959!
Spot why are you up there with Jack? You’ve barely said a word why are you suddenly involved?
I’m a Teddy Roosevelt fan so of course I ain’t gonna complain about him 👍
Hannah’s discrete clapping is so funny!
I do appreciate how they kept the historically accurate deal the newsies made with Pulitzer. In 92sies they just say ‘we beat ‘em!’ and then leave it at that.
Wow Albert looks cute without his hat
And we now get the famous shot of dazed Race staring off into space
Wait a minute so now after winning the strike, finding a girlfriend, and getting Crutchy back Jack still wants to leave?
Enough mushy talk, give me dancing newsies!
It’s funny how Jeremy tries to fit in with the others’ dancing right before bows
Wow. Just… wow. That’s a lotta stunts!
Nice bell-kick, Jeremy! Gotta mozie along with the music! 😆
#Newsies#newsies 1992#livesies#newsies broadway#Jack Kelly#Les Jacobs#david jacobs#sarah jacobs#boots newsies#skittery newsies#specs newsies#romeo newsies#elmer newsies#buttons newsies#finch newsies#racetrack higgins#racetrack newsies#spot conlon#Newsies The Musical#mush newsies#albert dasilva#albert newsies#livesies vs 92sies#ben cook#jeremy jordan#sky flaherty#tommy bracco#ben fankhauser#andrew keenan bolger#andrew keenan-bolger
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Good News - March 15-21
Like these weekly compilations? Support me on Ko-fi! Also, if you tip me on here or Ko-fi, at the end of the month I’ll send you a link to all of the articles I found but didn’t use each week - almost double the content! (I’m new to taking tips on here; if it doesn’t show me your username or if you have DM’s turned off, please send me a screenshot of your payment)
1. Comeback on the cards for Asian antelope declared extinct in Bangladesh
“Nilgais, the largest antelope species in Asia, are reappearing in northwestern Bangladesh, a country that was part of their historical range but where they were declared locally extinct in the 1930s due to habitat loss and hunting.”
2. Tribal Homes in Minnesotta [sic] Get $1.4M for Clean Electricity
““This grant will allow us to make electrification improvements to our members’ homes and involve them more directly in our efforts to change our energy narrative and achieve our net zero goal.””
3. Pollinators Flock to Flower-Filled Solar Panel Fields
“As populations of crucial pollinators decline, developers have been seeding the grounds of their solar arrays with native wildflowers. Now a five-year study published in Environmental Research Letters confirms that this approach boosts the pollinators’ abundance and diversity—with spillover benefits for surrounding farms.”
4. U.S. House of Representatives Passes WILD Act
“The WILD Act supports funding two different initiatives: […] the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service’s Partners for Fish and Wildlife Program offers critical support for voluntary conservation initiatives[, and…] The Multinational Species Conservation Funds play a pivotal role in supporting the conservation of imperiled species globally”
5. Private Gender Affirming Care Ban Fails To Advance In England After "Ferret Filibuster"
“A bill banning puberty blockers for trans youth and defining sex to exclude trans people was blocked from being heard after Labour MPs spoke at length on pet names and ferrets.”
6. Community-Led Effort to Plant Thousands of Seedlings
“Despite its urban surroundings, [the Tucki Tucki] creek serves as a vital refuge for the endangered platypus and purple spotted gudgeon populations. […] Planting native vegetation along the water’s edge serves multiple purposes. Not only does it provide crucial habitat for the endangered species, but it also helps stabilise the banks, mitigating erosion and reducing sedimentation in the creek.”
7. Court Ruling Halts Wolf Trapping and Snaring in Idaho Grizzly Bear Habitat
“[The ruling] will stop trapping and snaring […] to prevent the unlawful take of Endangered Species Act-protected grizzly bears. The decision stated, “There is ample evidence in the record, including from Idaho’s own witnesses, that lawfully set wolf traps and snares are reasonably likely to take grizzly bears in Idaho.””
8. A Boston grocery store is bringing community solar to a low-income area
“A group of energy-equity advocates in Boston is launching a community solar cooperative they say could be a scalable model for both reducing carbon emissions and building wealth in disadvantaged communities.”
9. Two-faced solar panels can generate more power at up to 70% less cost
“Scientists at the University of Surrey have built a new kind of solar panel with two faces, both of them pretty. Their flexible perovskite panels have electrodes made of tiny carbon nanotubes. These can generate more power with greater efficiency and at a cost 70% lower than existing solar panels.”
10. It's a boy! Athens zoo welcomes birth of rare pygmy hippo
“A rare and endangered pygmy hippopotamus has been born in Athens’ Attica Zoological Park for the first time in 10 years, delighting conservationists. A lack of male pygmy hippos in captivity had complicated breeding efforts, so zoo staff were “absolutely thrilled” the baby was a boy”
March 8-14 news here | (all credit for images and written material can be found at the source linked; I don’t claim credit for anything but curating.)
#good news#hopepunk#antelope#animals#extinction#conservation#solar#flowers#us politics#lgbtq#ferret#gender affirming care#native plants#wolf#grizzly bear#boston#poverty#solar power#solar energy#solar panels#zoo#hippo#pygmy hippo#baby animals#nature#wildlife#trans healthcare#deer#yellowstone
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put 5 songs you listen to, post it, then send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers <3 ( • ̀ω•́ )
(aw I’ve already kinda done this before sadly but I’ll post my 5 fave songs again I guess! It’ll probably be different from last time tho >_0)
Cigaro - System of A Down
Ready to Die - Andrew W.K.
I Just Threw Out The Love of My Dreams - Weezer
Aphrodite, Your Electric Sexiness (Upgrade) - Human Zoo & Will Wood
Simple Science - Cricket!
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The Best News of Last Week
⚡ - Goodbye Fossil Fuels, Hello Renewables: The Energizing News You Need
1. Fungi discovered that can eat plastic in just 140 days
Australian scientists have successfully used backyard mould to break down one of the world's most stubborn plastics — a discovery they hope could��ease the burden of the global recycling crisis within years.
It took 90 days for the fungi to degrade 27 per cent of the plastic tested, and about 140 days to completely break it down, after the samples were exposed to ultraviolet rays or heat. We really see a solution within five years, according to environmental scientist Paul Harvey, an expert on global plastic pollution.
2. Topeka Zoo welcomes new African Lion as female sprouts mane
The Topeka Zoo has welcomed a new African Lion to its pride, a male, as one of its females started to sprout a mane following the 2021 passing of the pride’s last male.
The Topeka Zoo and Conservation Center announced on Thursday, April 13, that Tatu, a 4-year-old African Lion, has arrived in the Capital City. He comes to Topeka from the Denver Zoo and his arrival marks a time of growth for the zoo.
3. This barber opens his shop on his day off for children with special needs – and all of their haircuts are free
On his day off, Vernon Jackson still goes to work, opening up his Cincinnati barber shop, Noble Barber and Beauty, for VIP clients: children with special needs.
It's something he's done since 2021. "I was hearing so many horror stories that parents were going through with other barber shops and just the barbers or stylists having no patience with their child," Jackson told CBS News. "So I figured I would compromise by coming in on my day off so there were there would be no other barbers or stylists in the shop and I could give them the full attention that they need."
4. Renewables break energy records signalling ‘end of the fossil age’
Experts are calling time on the fossil age as new analysis shows wind and solar power produced a record amount of the world’s electricity last year.
The renewables generated 12 per cent of global electricity in 2022, up from 10 per cent the previous year, according to the report from clean energy think tank Ember. Last year, solar was the fastest-growing source of electricity for the 18th year in a row, rising by 24 per cent from 2021.
5. New nuclear medicine therapy cures human non-hodgkin lymphoma in preclinical model
A new nuclear medicine therapy can cure human non-Hodgkin lymphoma in an animal model A single dose of the radioimmunotherapy, was found to quickly eliminate tumour cells and extend the life of mice injected with cancerous cells for more than 221 days (the trial endpoint), compared to fewer than 60 days for other treatments and just 19 days in untreated control mice.
To explain it in simple terms because this is so freaking cool: There is a radioactive atom attached to a drug. The target cell eats the drug and the energy coming off of the radioactive atom kills the target cell
6. Colorado passes first US right to repair legislation for farmers
Colorado farmers will be able to legally fix their own equipment next year, with manufacturers including Deere & Co obliged to provide them with manuals for diagnostic software and other aids, under a measure passed by legislators in the first U.S. state to approve such a law.
Equipment makers have generally required customers to use their authorized dealers for repairs to machines such as combines and tractors.
7. When a softball player falls after hitting a grand slam, this is how her opponents reacted
youtube
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That's it for this week :)
This newsletter will always be free. If you liked this post you can support me with a small kofi donation:
Buy me a coffee ❤️
Also don’t forget to reblog
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Egotober 2023 Day 5: Roses are Red, Violets are Blue
Summary: . . . Florida Teen Arrested for Putting Humans in Jars at Florida Zoo
Prompt: Jar
Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31
Bing liked humans, they were fun. Some were less fun than others, but on average he liked them.
And in Gainesville he saw all kinds of interesting and fun people. He liked going to school fairs and the schools definitely liked having an actual sentient AI talking to their budding STEM students. He had the names of hundreds and even thousands of budding scientists.
His names.
Bing wanted to see what they would become, what they would do.
One of his names however was causing problems in the city. And Bing only knew that cause this human child, a teenager really, was using something he had given to every name he kept tabs on. A little pin with a minute amount of dead nanites. Unusable, but noticeable.
A little budding eco-terrorist, and a dangerous one. Most of the time, his names resorted to firecrackers or at the most dangerous a pipe bomb.
This one was more dangerous, this one was causing civic engineering damage. They were smart, not just in what they were doing, but in being smart enough not to get caught.
And Google was starting to get interested. He refused to tell Bing why he was so intent on finding this person.
Fourteen hours after he’d called the Egoton branch for help, he got a call.
“Bing, what’s up?” Silver called.
“Finally,” Bing said. “Finished putting out fires?”
There was silence for a bit. “No. We’re fighting Irish and American immigration to get Marvin over here. Fuck Dark, and fuck no one here being able to read aura. What’s the problem? An eco-terrorist?”
“Yeah, one of Gainesville’s brightest is turning to crime to push back against a couple things in the city. And they’re smart enough not to get caught. We’ve been trying to catch this kid for four months.”
“How old is this person supposed to be?” Silver asked.
“Seventeen,” Bing said. “We think. They’re at least in high school.”
“Too young,” Silver said. “Between them and the guy that keeps trying to solve crime over here we might be dealing with a miniature league.”
“Don’t have to, dude,” Bing said.
“What does that mean?” Silver's tone sounded dangerous.
“Google’s interested in them, not Dark, Googs is hella interested.” Bing’s mind was already made up.
“We can’t have children fighting super villains, they’ll die. I’d rather fight against them than have them up against Dark. I lost Iblis, I will not lose anyone else.”
“Iblis wasn’t killed by a villain,” Bing said.
“I’m not arguing this with you. Dark travels down there to talk with some snake kingpin almost monthly. And he can be down there in minutes. I take either nine or three hours depending on where the fuck Egoton is because I sure don’t know where I am right now.”
“I can’t let Google have this kid, I can’t,” Bing said and hung up. Silver tried to call him back but Bing didn’t pick up.
Bing kept ignoring him as he broke apart into nanites and jumped from electrical outlet to outlet until he got to the nearby zoo where the latest situation was.
The eco-terrorist was in the zoo, terrorizing some of the patrons in, what felt like to Bing, the funniest way possible. Three patrons trapped under what looked like giant glass jars, ranting at them.
It was as adorable as it was dangerous. A seventeen-year-old in blue and black biker gear. It was almost enough to make Bing forget about how much damage they’d done.
“How do you like it when something throws things at you?” The teenage future-supervillain told a woman whose jar he was standing on top of. They sounded male-leaning but Bing had been corrected enough times.
“Well,” Bing said as he leaned against one of the jars where a young man was inside of it. Smiling. “Should I make the joke, dude? Or are you going to traumatize these people in a whole new way?”
The teenager almost startled and climbed off it before they could fall off of it. “Bing. You’re early.”
And they landed directly into Bing’s nanites. Nanites surged around them to bind the teen where they stood. Making it look like the top half of a jar.
“Nah, I was going to get you eventually, kid.” Bing said as he took the time to free the civilians and send them off.
Only one of the trapped people tried to beat up the tied and bound teenager.
Bing easily snagged him by the arm and threw him back. “Nah, big guy. You don’t need to pretend to be a man by beating up a tied up teenager.”
And for good measure, Bing audibly and visibly took a picture of his face. That got the guy to run off.
Leaving Bing with the “junior supervillain” on the mostly empty path. “Hey there.”
“I have a right to remain silent and I have a right to a lawyer.” The young villain said.
Bing used his nanites to unclip the kid’s motorcycle helmet. “You sure do.”
“Hey!” The teen said, trying to twist away. But the helmet came off and there was a perfectly normal teenage face.
Bing didn’t even need to start scanning his face. The android knew exactly who this was.
Logan E. Naraj. Honors high school student, and valedictorian at Buchholz High School. He/Him. The most promising of Bing’s names. Perhaps the single smartest student in the entire area, let alone in Gainesville. Maybe in the entire state, even. Not just in grades, Logan was devastatingly intelligent, and his eco-terrorist actions were proving it.
“I knew it had to be you,” Bing said. “You’re one of the only people smart enough to be doing half the stuff you’ve been doing.”
That seemed to disarm Logan a little bit, clearly not expecting a compliment. But he didn’t say anything in kind.
Bing stuck the helmet to Logan’s chest with nanites. Then Bing started taking Logan out of the zoo.
Police met with Bing about halfway towards the entrance. He was placed under arrest, and placed in the back of a cop car. Where Bing followed them closely to the station.
They got Logan into a little holding room, Bing not letting the kid out of his sight. It was only a matter of time before Google tried to sweep in. Bing couldn’t even guess what Google wanted with an actual human, but Logan had yet to actually kill anybody. If Google got involved he would quickly start.
They were waiting for a state lawyer and CPS to come in for Logan. So all they could do, since Logan refused to cooperate, was wait.
One of the investigators came over to Bing.
“Your friend come for him yet?” The officer said.
“No, but that’s probably because the dude knows I’m here,” Bing shrugged.
“Do you know what he wants yet?” The officer was shifting around but Bing didn’t pull up a camera to see it. He just shook his head and they were quiet for a good minute.
Then the officer clearly felt like silence was a bad idea.
“Logan Naraj, glad to finally have a name for what might be a two-year stint in juvie,” the officer said as Logan sat on the couch, Bing refusing to take his eye off him. So the second camera had to come up.
“And not the first Naraj we’ve had in the system, probably won’t be the last time either.” The office was giving Logan a scoffing, dismissive look.
“Why?” Bing asked.
“His older brother is currently serving a five year sentence at Florida Corrections, assault with a deadly weapon. He was sentenced last year. No parents, no surprise really.”
“Hmm, don’t think you should be making comments like that about a kid smart enough to make death rays.” Bing’s synthetic heart gave out a little bit.
The officer didn’t seem convinced but Bing didn’t care, he only had to convince Silver. And Bing was trying to cover every argument Silver had. He needed to keep this kid out of trouble, eternally bench him, and keep him in school.
He was already sending out a couple of emails as he’d been taking Logan to the station. And as he was looking at Logan and hearing this human bad talk him, he got a response from the only person besides Silver that he needed permission from.
“He’s going to be my apprentice,” Bing said.
“Why?” The investigator said.
“Look, either I take him for the Coalition, and he does community service for us, or Google takes him and he builds weapons for Dark and the League. Choose.”
“You said that just Google was interested in him,” the officer said.
“Yeah, and Google works for Dark, if Googs has anything, Dark has it,” Bing said. “And I don’t know if you know what happens in Egoton but Wilford doesn’t stay in jail, now does he?”
Bing waited to go in when the CPS rep and the lawyer had finally gotten in. He let them go in and talk to Logan before Bing walked in without the cops.
He grabbed a chair and turned it so he could lean his arms on the top of the backrest.
“Hey,” Bing smiled. Before the lawyer could make a noise, Bing kept talking. “You don’t have to say a word. You’re probably going back home after this. I just wanted to cut to the point where we make a deal, not waste your time.”
“He doesn’t have to take any kind of deal,” the lawyer said.
“Oh, I know,” Bing said, still smiling. “In fact, I hope he sleeps on it. Decisions need time to make them wisely, and I know Logan here is a smart kid.”
The lawyer glanced at Logan, and Bing let them remind Logan not to say a thing.
Bing pulled out a little card with the Coalition insignia on it and Bing’s contact information. “I want you to personally become my apprentice with the Coalition.”
“You can’t be serious,” The CPS rep said.
“Oh, buddy, I’m very serious,” Bing said. He looked at Logan. ��I know Googs has been contacting you, and I know because he was gloating about it. And I don’t want Google anywhere near you, dude. I don’t want Dark near you because anything Google has, belongs to Dark. Dark doesn’t care about anything but himself, that’s just a fact.”
Logan didn’t say anything, but his standoffishness didn’t seem as cold. Which was good.
“So we’re gonna take you home, you’re gonna think on this, and then if you want you call me. And we can start some balls rolling. Get you some more equipment. Have you not go to jail for almost destroying the bridge? Think of it as cutting around juvie and skipping right to community service?”
Logan stayed quiet but Bing could see the gears turning.
Bing smiled and walked out, leaving Logan with the humans, and a smile on Bing’s face.
The police were pissed, no surprise. They’d caught Logan but were unable to arrest him on the spot.
Bing watched CPS take Logan home, where he basically was by himself, and was given instructions not to contact Bing or Google.
The kid didn’t last the night.
Bing stood on his apartment step, to be polite, and waited as Logan answered the door.
“I’m not saying yes,” Logan said as Bing walked in.
“Well, this sure ain’t a no, dude,” Bing smiled as he looked around and basically placed a tracking marker in the place so he could quickly come and go from the place.
“Hey, you like Wendy’s, kid?” Bing said.
The kid just glared at him. “I’m vegetarian.”
“Neat, cool,” Bing smiled at him. “I’ll order something else.”
“You don’t eat human food,” Logan said.
“I mean, I can, but we’ll be talking about this for a while and you’ve been out all night,” Bing said as he sat backwards on a rickety kitchen chair. Leaving the slightly comfier armchair for Logan.
“I’m just allowed to join the Coalition?” Logan asked.
Bing gave Logan a huge smile. “I’m in charge of the South Branch of the Coalition, only Silver and Jackie have any extra say on stuff. I got Jackie’s approval a couple hours ago, and I can convince Silver. Don’t worry. The only thing you’ve got to worry about, little man, is staying in school, and staying out of trouble.”
“You’ve promised change,” Logan said.
“There are a lot of things wrong in this city, and with the country, Lo, you’re taking on the small fry. Normal people. I want bigger, dude. I want to take on people like Dark, people who are stagnating the city.” Bing said as he tried not to lean forward in the chair and break it.
“If I joined, what would I be doing day-to-day?” Logan asked.
“Investigative work, maybe researching various magical and no-magical artifacts, you’ll be in school a lot of the time, there’s no getting around that.” Bing said.
“Okay, if it’s between you and Dark, I guess I don’t have a choice,” Logan said.
Bing stood up and clapped his hands. “Alrighty, then, dude.”
Out of his arm he pulled out something that looked more like a watch then the rest of the Coalition communicators. “To our newest hero. Welcome to the party, my man.”
“Logic,” Logan said.
“That your name?” Bing asked.
“Yes, if I could pick one it would be: Logic,” Logan said.
“Perfect, my dude,” Bing said.
“Where do you stay, or are you allowed to tell me?” Logan asked.
“Hey, I live anywhere with good bandwidth,” Bing said, shrugging. “You need me anywhere, anytime, and I got you.”
“Noted,” Logan said, trying to act normal but Bing wasn’t fooled. Those facial expressions, that heart rate. He cared a lot, that made Bing very happy.
Bing held out his hand. “I can order that food, and then you can get some sleep. You’ve got school tomorrow, after all and we’ll keep talking about Coalition stuff after school.”
“Alright,” Logan said.
So Bing ordered some late night vegetarian Chinese food. Logan ate and then he went to bed, and Bing went to go and officially tell Google to back off from Logan. That he had it under control and Logan got to be theirs without also being Dark’s.
#Egotober 2023#Superhero AU#Masks and Maladies#Bingiplier#Logan Sanders#Logan is filled with indignate rage and crime#as is his right#yes
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BoC Chapter 2
Benefit 2: New Ways to Avoid People
It’s been a few days since they began their camping trip. Aside from the long drive (California is a long state; absolutely awful to drive through), it’s been four days of mosquitos, ants, and adults raving about the cryptids they want to find. Most of them either want to kill and stuff them or vivisect them. There is exactly one person who wants to take their cryptid and take them to a zoo or on a tour, and one guy who wants to just study the animal without the vivisection. He wants to do catch-and-release with a tracker and follow the Bigfoot to other Bigfoots (Bigfeet?) to observe from afar their behavior.
The sun rises on a new day, the fifth day, and Danny starts by waking up hours before dawn and checking his favorite sites for astronomy news while pretending to be asleep.
After breakfast, Danny decides to take a hike alone. Jazz will be watching the adults. She brought a stack of notebooks and has been taking notes on what she observes from them. According to her, it’s so she can “compare similar obsessive behavior relative to our parents before ghosts were confirmed to exist”.
He has the feeling that if she can, she’ll be charting something once she gets enough data. He might even have to sit through a presentation on her findings if she gets really into it once they get home.
As it is, the local wildlife is helping him greet the day. Nothing quite like several mosquito bites to make things exciting .
The air itself is dense, heavy with the scent of incoming rain.
He’s spent a lot of time out here because he’s gotten several funny looks from his parents’ friends and one of them pulled aside his mom to ask if they were quite certain Danny wasn’t a changeling.
He’s not a huge fan of them being the ones to out him to his parents.
Thankfully, his parents had been dismissive of it, saying they’d know if Danny wasn’t human. He’s just contaminated with ectoplasm and that leads to some odd behaviors. It’s how they excuse the paleness, the way he moves, and how he remembers everything .
“ Everything ” is honestly an exaggeration, but it weirds people out when he remembers things that took place when he was an infant and when he remembers everything that people say they’ll do. Some of it is Obsession, some of it is necessity from keeping track of lies and monitoring his adults to be sure they’re not noticing his ghostliness too much. Some of it is physiological, Danny is pretty sure. Baby ghosts don’t forget things the way humans do because they don’t have neurons or synapses to change as they age.
His parents have no idea how contaminated he is.
The tree branches sweep overhead in a violent gust of wind. There’ll be a storm soon. Danny decides he’d better head back. Unless he plans on walking around intangibly, he’s a little worried about a tree limb falling and hitting him. There are dozens of twigs and branches, and on his many walks, there’ve been at least 10 fallen trees in varying states of decay.
He chugs the last of his can of Monster Energy and wanders back in the general direction of camp until the energy kicks in and he can locate it a bit more accurately.
After a good hour of hiking, he makes it back to a camp in uproar.
On the edge of camp, a pyramid-shaped metal cage buzzes with electricity. Inside it, a massive, dull blue animal shifts. The cage is clearly too small, and according to his caffeine-enhanced empathic abilities, the animal is radiating a toxic mixture of worry and anger into the air more fuzzily than any animal Danny has ever met. It’s one of the odd differences between humans and animals; most animals exude their emotions clearly, while humans tend to have more thoughts muddying up Danny’s ability to read their emotions.
In fact, the animal is registering to Danny’s empathy as awfully human.
Previous Chapter: https://www.tumblr.com/picklefics/729100108662259713/benefits-of-camping-or-how-to-not-hunt-bigfoot?source=share
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Ranking Plush Wild Republic Rattlesnakes
Part 1: Ranking Plush Anacondas
Part 2: Ranking Plush Cobras
Part 3a: Ranking Plush Rattlesnakes
The photo limit for posting is 30 photos and Wild Republic was fully taking up 1/3 of the list so I moved the brand as a whole to their own post. Some listings are labeled as K&M International, which seems to be their former name.
I looked through my stuffed animals and I have one WR stuffed animal I could find, a giraffe from Lincoln Park Zoo's adopt an animal program I got for Xmas from my partner. Wild Republic partners with multiple organizations including the Audubon Society, which I talked about a little in my Anaconda post, and also the WAZA (World Association of Zoos and Aquariums), hence why you'll find their plushies in zoos.
Personally, their snakes are very hit-or-miss for me, although I should note they seem to have different price points so some are naturally higher quality than others. They've been around since 1979 but according to their own website boomed in popularity in 1999. Since then, they seem to have introduced and discontinued many stuffed animals, hence why they appear so many times on the ranking lists.
Super Jumbo Western Diamondback by Wild Republic (1)
113in
7/10 This rattlesnake is fine, but doesn't hold up next to Rambo IMO. There is also a 70in version on the WR website and I think they use the exact same fabric patterns, which is why the "jumbo" version has such small triangles. I couldn't find confirmation it has a rattle. IMO if I'm going to get a rattlesnake plush it should have a rattle, but I won't take off a point for that in the rankings because I don't think I'll be able to confirm that for most. But in my heart this is a 6/10.
Green Rock Rattlesnake by Wild Republic (2)
54in
8/10 Okay, I have to admit, I don't like the physical design of this snake very much. But I had to give it extra points for the audacity of including such a specific species of rattlesnake. I didn't know of this rattlesnake, but it is also called the banded rattlesnake and can come in a variety of colors including apparently gray, pink(ish), blue, and white. None of them are as vibrant as the green of this stuffed animal. They used this as an opportunity to make a blue version as well (this one listed at 70in):
On the topic of product descriptions, the Wild Republic website describes the green snake like this:
Long, lean, mean and green
I'm not a fan.
Green Rock Rattlesnake Toy by Wild Republic (3) via stuffedwithplushtoys
54in
2/10 I will give this snake props for... being unique, and having a rattle. But, seeing the fact this appears to no longer be sold on the Wild Republic website, I think its obvious why this was not successful. (At least stuffedwithplushtoys put nice facts about snakes in the product description)
his one seems to also have a blue type, although I only found this one picture:
Timber Rattlesnake by Wild Republic (4)
54in
7/10 I think that this uses the same sewing pattern as the other Wild Republic rattlesnakes. The website boldly proclaims this a "lifelike stuffed version" which I find extremely funny given they chose to make this snake bright magenta. But I found it so funny I ended up really liking her, she's iconic. In case you're wondering, real Timber Rattlesnakes are brown.
Twin Spotte Snake by Wild Republic (5)
70in
3/10 It doesn't look like this particular entry was proofread before being posted. The twin-spotted rattlesnake is indeed a species, and can be a kind of greyish blue. I don't rank this low because I dislike the bright blue- I just ranked the magenta timber rattler higher- I just don't like the pattern. Looking at the other WR rattlers, this one is so far off, it doesn't even look inspired by the twin-spotted? It looks like a burmese python pattern in blue. If you know the Deep History of my blog you know that I once had a dream featuring an electric blue burmese python, so we can only hope they use this fabric for a python in future posts.
I found a very similarly patterned snake that seems to be exclusive to Saint Louis Zoo, which I didn't fit into the other post because of length constraints, plus because it is so simimlar to the above plushie. The seller did not include any tags, although there don't seem to be any visible anyways, and the snake is not sold online. I assume it was custom ordered from one of the many plush companies I've been looking at in these posts, though.
Foilkins Rattlesnake by Wild Republic (6)
54in
7/10 This snake isn't really "my thing" but I have to admit, it is very cute regardless. It doesn't seem that huggable due to the material, but thats kind of the whole gimmick with the foilkins. I will accept that this one is not for me, but is good. I'm also gonna tuck this other foilkins rattlesnake in this section, it's clearly a rattlesnake but wasn't tagged as such:
Colorful Snake by Wild Republic (7)
54in
7/10 I thought I was finally free from Wild Republic when I found an e-bay listing showing the full body of this snake. It's listed as "Colorful snake" and not tagged rattlesnake on the WR site, and the fully body isn't visible so I'd written it off as a non-rattler. I guess this is very loosely a "horned rattlesnake" with a wacky pattern, but I'm ranking it highly because I think its a fun artistic direction.
Tribal Orange Snake by Wild Republic (8)
54in
0/10 I realized I had missed this one while looking through the "snakes" catalog. I'm ranking this one 0 because I'm not a fan of companies using the word "tribal" for any pattern, its just meaningless. Plus its just a little busy- I prefer the other colorful orange one.
2010 Purple Rattlesnake by Wild Republic (9) via ebay
50in
6/10 e-bay continues to taunt me by suggesting new Wild Republic Rattlesnake Plushes. I don't like this one very much and I wasn't sure if I should include it because its really just a snake with a rattlesnake tail, and because there are so many other WR plushies on this post, but it does look very soft. A different ebay seller seemed to have labeled this (or a very similar purple snake) as "Rainforest Cafe" so it may have been produced for them.
Patchwork Rattlesnake by Wild Republic (10) via ebay
70in
7/10 Like some of the others, I like this brightly colored one for its creative take on the patterns of a rattlesnake. This does mean fully 1/3 of this list is WR, but what can I say, they love rattlesnakes.
Blue Rock Rattlesnake by Wild Republic (11) via ebay
55in
4/10 I think this is meant to be a different version of the twin spotted rattlesnake, but this ebay listing was the only place I found this snake- they didn't even include a picture of the tag, so I can't confirm 100% this is WR, but it looks like their work. I just think the pattern and color choices on this one are kind of ugly. (The threads around the rattle are loose, hence why it has no detail).
Red Green Snake by Wild Republic
54in
8/10 This is the first unique shape and style from WR we've seen in a while! I like the face, its cute, and I like the creative patterns. The above photo is from ebay, but I did confirm that this snake is still sold on the WR website- the preview image on their site doesn't show the tail, and it's not tagged rattlesnake.
Plush Diamondback Rattlesnake by K&M International / Wild Republic via ebay
53in
4/10, this is a perfectly fine rattlesnake, although I don't like how the diamonds are not neatly centered. The most interesting thing about this one is the age- the ebay listing states this is from 1998, but not the manufacturer. The tag was very damaged but did say "1998 K", and as you may recalled K&M International did not rebrand to Wild Republic until 1999. I then found a listing with the same type with a better-looking tag, confirming the manu.
That's all the Wild Republic rattlesnakes so far! (not sponsored ofc, the other post has the other brands, again these just didn't fit!) Don't forget to read the post with the other rattlers!!
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