#either way it deserves to be revisited/fully fleshed out

[degenerating-regenerate]

#peter is going to have a long hard look at himself in the mirror about his spidey sense not triggering#(you know what else is long and hard—)#wade: see that metro bus over there?#peter: yeah....#wade: i save. you film#peter: save it from wh—#wade pulling explosives out of his pockets: grab your camera babe we're on a time crunch here#who will write this for me

^op ur so right

spideypool but it's a comedy of errors

[hongism]

hi caly boo its ur 🌊 anon! i finally finished the most brilliant darkness and oh my lawd i’m in spain without the s. to put it shortly: U DID NOT DISAPPOINT BESTIE, and it seems unreal that u and ur mind and this fic even exists bc every moment is just polished to perfection, while simultaneously every character is polished to a sort of imperfect perfection(?). i have so many questions and things to say idek where to start, and tho im not good with words and even worse at deciphering hidden meanings, here are just some of my thoughts that i remember from the story.

hello my dear!!! eee im gonna answer separately since i think i’ll be very long-winded as usual but first of all thank you so much :(( this fic is actually very full of subliminal messages and hidden nuances that are weaved throughout which i think could be quite confusing so i apologize for that! if i had managed my time better, i would have adjusted when i started the fic to account for managing those aspects of the fic but alas i’m terrible at time management and i suck so. anyways.

first of all, ngl halfway into the story i lowkey forgot this was a wooyoung fic bc SANNN and also bc wooyoung appeared like 3 times lol. even after it finishing all that, i still had my doubts as to why this is a wooyoung fic, or more like why is san this significant in a wooyoung fic. im still a bit slow on these pls forgive me and im just curious why u made it like that.

i think yeah the most interesting thing about this fic is the emphasis on san over wooyoung. and when looking over it yeah i could have switched san and wooyoung’s characters and called it a day, but wooyoung really in my mind acts as the integral turning point for decisions made in the story. 

the goal with the fic wasn’t really to be hyperfocused on the pairing itself, but rather the emotions and thought processes of each character (aside from wooyoung). wooyoung was kept intentionally mysterious and a bit set apart from the rest of the fic because his role in story was moreso an abstract of hestia, the goddess of the hearth and home. wooyoung’s character appeared in times where y/n was struggling with the thought of home or adjusting to the new changes in her life! wooyoung’s pairing itself was actually intended to be solely platonic at first, but as the story went on i thought having mc develop feelings for him added another turning point in the fic!

moving on, the second biggest question i had is the whole hestia!wooyoung and cafe aurora situation. i did a bit of reading on hestia and only found out that she was the goddess of hearth, which might explain the fireplace and the kind of homey feeling to the cafe. and ‘cafe aurora not really existing to most’ part, which was already hinted at wooyoung randomly disappearing, mc never seeing the cafe before or wooyoung only bringing people he wants into it. i get that him inviting mc must suggest her significance to him, but why was he so adamant about his friends not mentioning him or the cafe to mc before that? wooyoung is quite a mysterious character i think, and given that this fic is supposed to be about him, it’s a bit odd that there’s still so many things left unknown, but its kinda cool that way nonetheless and im guessing u would also like to explain that further outside of the story too.

i think my biggest regret about this fic is the fucking summary.... i wrote that summary well before i even started writing the fic thinking it would go in that direction but it didn’t. and since this fic was for a collab, i left the summary as is because i genuinely cannot for the life of me figure out a better one. but i’m trying to figure out a better one. but i really fucking hate the current summary because it’s not at all what the fic is truly about and i hate it.

however, i don’t hate the fic itself, and the reason why i don’t is because i got to play with both my writing style and how i displayed the story. for this collab we were asked to pick a greek god and one of the seven deadly sins, and i selected hestia and sloth. and initially i had intended to have sloth be represented by the reader’s depression, and wooyoung be a more ‘real’ depiction of hestia. i shifted gears very early on in the fic but what it became is moreso abstract realizations in the characters.

san’s character is meant to be this idea of sloth, and it’s mentioned several times that he doesn’t want to move forward, he wants to go slow, he wants to stop moving so fast through life, and those things point to him being a depiction of sloth

wooyoung’s was harder to encapsulate in a more abstract way but you hit the nail on the head really with the homey feeling of the cafe. beyond that, mc talks about just naturally feeling at ease and comfortable with how things are with wooyoung and being around him, and he takes up this role of being the likeable, warm, cozy, comforting character. it all comes to a head in the last scene where he brings both y/n and san into the cafe.

and again wooyoung’s character is meant to be most mysterious and abstract, but if i had had more time to fully flesh out the fic, i think i would have liked to touch more on him. at the same time however i left it more open-ended and open to interpretation. the significance in him inviting mc in and not being mentioned by the others sooner is twofold. one; the others never really had any reason whatsoever to mention wooyoung. he was a friend outside the circle who never joined in with them when mc was around. i personally in my own friendships don’t mention friends outside the circle by name or anything, just kinda vaguely talking about them unless im certain the people know who this person is. the concept of wooyoung having to invite mc in was more nuanced and vague as well, intentionally so, but that was moreso meant to represent this idea of ‘you can’t make a home somewhere where you aren’t invited’ so y/n couldn’t fully make a home of the place she was in without being invited in and welcomed in, but again that’s something i wish i had more time to fully flesh out.

the hongjoong speech about love (and also the interaction with seonghwa after that) deserves a standing ovation of its own 👏 unfortunately, or not, im not actually going through the emotional turmoil regarding love the same way as hj or mc to be able to fully relate to his words, but the whole ‘if you dont love what u see in the mirror then u dont love it’ mentality really hit me hard, and i’d like to hang onto that when i make decisions in the future haha thank you wise caly! seonghwa and hongjoong’s story is also beautiful, and just like mc said, the more i look at it the more it hurts :’)

the hongjoong speech about love was meant to be something very jaded and specific to his worldview. it actually isn’t wholly how i view love personally, but it was a perfect description to how both he and y/n perceived the love in their own lives. mostly thanks to their own emotional turmoils. the mentality of the mirror quote is something that i think i also struggle with, which is why i included it. it’s hard to do, but even in friendships, i think it’s necessarily to stop and look at the person you were before this relationship and then the person during this relationship. if you don’t love the one you are now, then maybe it’s a sign to reflect and see the bigger picture, so that was a lil reminder to myself and i’m glad it touched you as well!!!

“do you love him, or do you love the idea of being in love with him?” - haha i see what u did there (or maybe i didnt please dont laugh at me if i didnt). its still so good everytime i see it bc i keep finding myself loving just the idea of things time and time again even when this makes total sense to me oof :/

heh yeah again with the more abstract concepts this one was more direct and ‘cliche’ but i fully wanted that cliche in the fic because i thought it suited the situation where mc was constantly struggling with a version of san that she thought she loved vs the version of san she got every time they were together

despite how enlightened she seems to be, mc still made the same choices, and i wanna smack her for it and pat her back at the same time. and maybe also bc of the fact that she feels so differently for the two men that i feel like no ending could really justify her decision, so ending in the vague is probably the best. your ending might kind of allude to someone more than the other already, and tho i still don’t think he’s the best one for her based on just my pov on love, i kinda agree with you. but again, this raises the question of, why a wooyoung fic and not a san fic?

and yeah the whole knife in the chest at the end of it all is that she was still too scared to face the music so to speak. but really i would say she made the same choices up until the conversation on the balcony with san. and you’re absolutely right, the reason i chose the ending the way i did was because either way, there’s no justification. and actually although it might seems like i was alluding to someone specific, san being in the cafe at the very end was moreso to represent that as much as they fought, he still very much loved her and wanted to be loved by her. it was kinda an open casket ending there were no nails in the coffin, the choice between wooyoung and san still stands and an argument could be made for either of them! i think this is a fic that i could see myself revisiting one day with two endings - one for san, and one for wooyoung.

something i didn’t mention earlier about wooyoung’s character being left intentionally mysterious was that he was representing a new and budding love. the honeymoon phase where you’re falling for someone you don’t even really know. you are the reader aren’t meant to really know who wooyoung is because of that beyond what you read about him, so his past and such was left out intentionally to represent that idea of ‘hey wow im in love with a stranger!’ whereas san was this gritty love that’s bad for you. and there are pros and cons to each just as with anything!!

so,,,, why a wooyoung fic and not a san fic? well i picked wooyoung for my collab so he was one of the main focuses of the fic regardless of which direction i took with it. as for why wooyoung wasn’t more forward, i already answered that but !!! i view it as both a wooyoung fic and a san fic. both are highlighted characters with main pairing roles!

i literally just woke up to write this and am going back to sleep ahaha so i apologize if this makes no sense. i somehow felt like i’ve read so much yet so little at the same time, maybe bc there are still so many things i havent fully made sense of, and that’s where i hope you come in and enlighten me. i still stand by my word that this fic deserves so much more recognition despite the lack of explicit smut bc of how much more you’ve explored through character building. love you caly and thank u for working so hard <3 — 🌊

no worries my beloved i hope you go back to sleep and get lots and lots of rest!! and i hope my response helps enlighten the not so clear things as well dgjdklfg but really thank you so much. it was a long fic and hard to get through at times, but as a whole, i’m proud of it and what i created, so thank you for recognizing my efforts and appreciating them 🥺

[sierraraeck]

The Second Case (Pt.2)

BAU x OC Aundreya

Masterlist | Series Masterlist

(This is my gif so please give credit if used)

Summary: The second case with the team means revisiting Aundreya’s hometown of Chicago. It quickly becomes personal and requires her to use connections and skills she acquired on the streets. Story two.

Category: Just working a case with the team

Warnings: Normal CM gore. A case involving young teenage girls. Mentions of drugs. Cussing.

Word Count: 3.3k

A/N: Just a reminder that this is all 100% fiction and I don’t actually know how gangs work.

“Ben Brady, 30 years old, with a history of peeping and a restraining order from his ex-girlfriend,” Penelope informed us.

“He fits the description,” Aaron said, as we looked at him from behind the one way glass.

Derek stepped out of the interrogation room, the third to do so. “He’s not gonna talk.”

“We have to keep trying. He knows where they are,” Aaron said.

“I’m telling you, we have got to start looking for other leads, because I even offered him a deal, and he still wouldn’t budge,” Derek said with just an undertone of defeat.

“I could talk to him,” I suggested. If we had already broken the rules by having me out in the field, we might as well just break them all, right?

“No. I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Aaron told me.

“Have you even ever interrogated someone before?” Rossi asked.

“Sure.”

“Sure? What does that mean?” Rossi pressed.

“It means that while I might not have FBI regulated training, I have interrogated people before. Plus, I think he might be a bit more accustomed to my methods,” I put out there.

“What makes you say that?”

“Oh, come on. I can smell the hood rat from here,” I said, scrunching my nose. Despite the fact that he looked like a middle class man that could have accidentally gotten involved with the wrong person, I could tell that wasn’t the case. Rossi’s eyebrows shot up. “What? Isn’t that what you hired me for?”

“I guess,” he replied.

“Hotch, isn’t this against protocol?” Derek asked.

“Yes, but I’m pretty sure letting a young girl die because the person who could be most useful in a situation like this isn’t allowed to talk to the guy in her field of expertise, is also against protocol,” I answered for him. When I received no protests, I went to my bag and pulled out a notepad and pen and set it on the table right outside the door.

“What’s that for?” Rossi asked me.

“We’ll need it later.” I hope. I continued to shuffle around in my bag until I found what else I was looking for. I put on the 6 chain bracelets and the two rings made up of small beaded links on my left wrist and pinky.

“How about those?” Derek asked.

“A means of persuasion.”

“Wait you’re not going to-”

“Calm down. I’m not going to beat him up or whatever crazy thing you think I’m going to do. These are just a form of identification,” I interrupted.

“Okay, but what are they,” Derek asked.

I turned to look at him and saw Reid approaching the group, and decided to let him explain, “Why don’t you ask Doctor Reid.” I turned and entered the interrogation room before anyone could stop me. I didn’t even have a file or pictures to show him, but I didn’t need them. I sat down across from Ben.

He looked up at me, “You’re a little bit young to be working for the FBI.”

“You’re a little bit old to be hanging out with 14 year old girls,” I retorted. He looked back down. I knew that he was probably part of the Angels before the Cloaks took them over, and that he probably left to either fend for himself, or join a different gang. I was hoping for the latter.

“Gaela,” I said. He shot me a quick glance. Good. He was from the Angels if he recognized the leader’s last name. Now I just had to throw out others to figure out if he was in a new gang or not.

“Dimitrov, Carden, Dominic,” I listed. No reaction.

“Novak.” Still nothing.

“Hoeye,” I said. There it was. The slight eye shift in my direction. “Ooh. I don’t think he’d be very happy if he knew that you and your buddy were going rogue.”

“I’m not going to talk to you,” he stated. I stared him down for a few moments before lifting my left arm so that he could process the jewelry covering it. His eyes went wide.

“Are those-”

“Yep,” I cut him off.

“And you have-”

“Yep.”

“Which makes you-”

“Yep. In the flesh,” I said with a smirk. He immediately shifted in his seat, becoming exponentially more uncomfortable. “Now do you feel like talking?”

“Oh, uh. Um, no. What are you doing helping the FBI?” he said flustered, but trying to regain his ground.

“Does that sound like any of your business?” I hissed.

“No, but-”

“No. It’s not. And from where I’m sitting, you’ve got two options. Give me what I want, or maybe I’ll decide to pay your friend Hoeye a quick visit.”

“You can’t. The FBI’s probably got you under intense surveillance.”

“That could be true. But considering they’re probably going to spit me back out by the end of the week landing me back on the streets gives me all the flexibility I’d need,” I squinted my eyes at him. I could tell his confidence was starting to waver and he was beginning to give in to me. Just to fully sell it, I pushed my hair behind my left ear, turning my head to expose that part of my neck as I did. It revealed the tattoos that indicated I’d been to a supermax prison and that I’d escaped. “Your move.”

He swallowed hard and started shifting his eyes around as I moved my hair back to cover the tattoos. I couldn’t forget that there was a secondary audience. I leaned back in my chair. “So, Ben, if you’ve heard of me, you’ve probably heard of some of my pet-peeves, right? Do you remember what one of them was?” I asked rhetorically. “One of them, is that I absolutely cannot stand people who waste. My. Time. Does that ring a bell?”

He shifted in his chair and started rubbing his hands together. I was close. “Have you ever heard from one of those lucky people about the pleasant things that happen to them? Especially if they were to piss me off enough after, say, elaborately getting a young girl killed?”

Morgan was right, though. He was a tough one to crack. “She’s only 14,” I reminded him.

“Yeah, and you were only 14 when you landed here and you did fine for yourself,” he countered, but his voice was faltering.

“True. But one of us has a chance of getting out. Which one do you think that is?” I pointed out. He just sat there. I got up out of my chair and walked over to him. I placed a hand on his shoulder and leaned in so that he could practically feel each word falling from my lips. “Just remember this moment, when you had the choice of self preservation, the number one rule on the streets, and instead you chose blind loyalty. He’d turn you in in a heartbeat, and he’d be smart to do so. He’ll probably move up the ranks, and get the credit he deserves. I mean, that’s what I did. But you? You will just be added to the long list of disposable low-lives who died by my hand.”

I slowly started walking away, giving him the chance to stop me. I reached for the handle of the door when I got what I wanted. “Wait,” he said. I turned around and took my place across the table from him.

“Do you have paper and a pen?” he asked. I smirked at him and lifted my left hand up like I was a waitress at a restaurant. I hoped someone got the memo because it would only add to the power I held over Ben if it looked like I already had the FBI wrapped around my finger. Luckily, I heard the door click open and the pad and pen were placed in my hand. I could tell from the shoes in my peripheral and the scented cologne that it was Rossi who did so. He quickly vacated the room. Without breaking eye contact with Ben, I put the pad down on the table with a satisfying slap. I pushed it over to him with the pen.

“So you really earned all of these?” he asked, suddenly grabbing my wrist and turning it over to admire the number of beads. He was looking at them in wonder and it was disgusting. I yanked my wrist from his grasp.

“Just start writing,” I said, and he did. He wrote down the address and a full list of all the girls they had taken over the last few months. He shoved it toward me and, as expected, ‘Jayana Orion’ was scratched down at the bottom. It made me want to hit the guy in the face right there. I looked over the list but there was one thing he forgot to add.

“Do you think you’re smart or something? Don’t try to bullshit me!” I yelled, as I walked over to his side of the table.

“I honestly forgot-”

“No you didn’t. Not. Smart. Complete the list,” I demanded. He frantically wrote down the name of his accomplice. Accomplices? There were two of them? “There. That’s better.”

“What are you going to do now?” he asked, but the concern was obviously only for himself.

“I guess I’ll consider not telling Hoeye about our little chat. As long as this holds up,” I gestured to his list, quickly raising my eyebrows at him before exiting the room.

Everyone was staring at me. “What in the hell was that?” Derek asked, but he didn’t sound necessarily irritated. I answered by turning the notepad around so that they could all see the list of information scrawled across it. I took a few steps toward Derek and I pressed the pad against his chest, with just a little bit of added force. I looked up at him.

“That was me saving a little girl’s life.” I walked out of the hallway and back into the bullpen to sit down.

Everyone started rushing around me, getting their gear together and leaving to go off and save those girls. Everyone except for Emily.

“Hey,” she said, sitting down across from me.

“What are you still doing here? Don’t they need you in the field?”

“Usually. But they’ve got about a hundred officers and the rest of the team headed out there. I think they’ve got it.”

“Ah. I see. You got put on babysitting duty,” I said. “Do you guys draw names out of a hat or something?”

She gave a single laugh. “No, not this time. I volunteered.”

“Oh, wow. Didn’t realize you had a thing for S and M,” I teased.

She rolled her eyes at me. “Is that what you really think? That you are that unpleasant to be around?”

“Yeah, pretty much. That’s the general consensus.”

Not exactly knowing how to reply and not wanting to push me any farther, she changed the subject.

“So you really got all those links?”

I was confused for a moment until I remembered that I was still wearing my bracelets and rings. “Oh. Yeah. Did the Doctor tell you about them?”

“Yeah. He told us that it’s a way for guards and inmates to track each other kind of like a ranking system. The more you have, the worse you’ve been, and higher ranked you are. You receive one for each time you went to the infirmary, sent someone to the infirmary, and a certain number for each type of crime you’ve committed. He also told us that the most anyone had ever gotten was four bracelets and a ring. You have that beat by a lot,” she recited.

“I do. Lucky me,” I said, removing them and placing them back in my bag.

“How did you know that you were going to need a pen and paper before you even went in to interrogate?”

“It’s almost like an unspoken rule as far as gangs go. People could be wired, so you don’t want to have to say things out loud. If the place has surveillance, you can easily just shield the paper from the cameras and a lot of people can write in code much better than they can speak it. Plus, once he knew I was The Figure, he would know that I always ask for extensive lists.”

“How did you know Rossi would come in and deliver the stuff to you?” she asked, almost in wonder. Almost.

“To be honest, that was a shot in the dark. It would help me scare him if it looked like I had power even over the FBI and I was just hoping one of you back there would pick up on it.” We were silent for a while before she asked me her next question.

“Do I want to know what you whispered to him?”

“Probably not,” I stated matter-of-factly.

“Alright, then would you tell me about your tattoos?”

I looked up at her. No one had ever asked me that question before. I must have seemed so dumbfounded because she showed me a tattoo of her own. It was on her right hip bone and it was of Saturn. Just two simple circles but you could tell it was Saturn.

“When I was young, I was always traveling places with my mom. I never really felt like I had one home and things were changing constantly. Whenever I got nervous before a move or I just couldn’t handle the stress of constant change, she would always tell me wherever I was on planet Earth, no matter how much things were changing for me, all the planets were still orbiting the Sun. Things weren’t changing for them, and I could always count on them to be constant. It helped keep me grounded and I like the reminder every now and then.”

It was a sweet story, and I knew it was my turn. “Pretty much all of mine are just for street-related identification purposes. None that have quite as good of a backstory. This one,” I said, exposing my right collar bone, “is for the Cloaks. This one,” I showed the one on my left hip bone, “is for my underground ring. Then I’ve got these ones on my neck,” I said pulling my hair out of the way for the second time, “which shows that I’ve been to a supermax, and then escaped,” I concluded. I wasn’t willing to tell her about the others.

“What about the one on your pinky knuckle?” I was hoping she wouldn’t ask, having just removed the rings that covered it.

“That one…” I trailed off. I was saved by the bell when she got an incoming call. It was Aaron, letting her know that they’d got the guys and were bringing them in. They’d found Jayana Orion, three other girls, and many more photos of victims-to-be. The four of them were on their way to the hospital.

“Let’s go,” Prentiss said.

I was confused. “Go where?”

“The hospital. We are going to meet them there and give their families an update.” I wasn’t given time to protest as she grabbed my arm, practically yanking me to the car.

# # # # # # # # # # # # #

At the hospital, Prentiss and the rest of the team went to the families of the other three girls to tell them what had happened, and were showered with hugs and words of gratitude. I sat in the farthest corner trying to make myself as inconspicuous as possible, (which wasn’t that hard given my talent for it) dreading when Todd would show up. Prentiss waved me over to where the happy reunited families were, but I shook my head. Clearly that wasn’t the response she was looking for, because soon she was dragging me over to the group. I stood there awkwardly while the rest of them soaked in the glory of four saved girls.

“Just so you know, the FBI isn’t going to spit you back out onto the streets,” she whispered.

“Yeah, sure. I just convinced their best team to break the only rules set in place for me within the first two weeks, and I’m sure I’ll manage to find some other ways to screw things up,” I responded.

“Don’t worry about the rules. You helped save four young girls. Now, just focus on not screwing things up,” she said with a sly smile. I rolled my eyes.

“Easier said than done, but, thanks. Best pep-talk ever,” returning the same sly smile.

That’s when Todd walked in.

“Where is she? Where is my daughter?” he asked no one in particular.

Jayana was unconscious in her hospital bed, JJ explained, but she should be fine and waking up within the next day or so. He thanked her and the rest of the team for finding Jayana when his gaze landed on me. His mood immediately shifted. Anyone with eyes could see the pure hatred radiating off of him. I swallowed and turned away.

“Aundreya,” he spat my name like it physically hurt him to say it. It probably did.

“Todd,” I responded, flicking my eyes over to him. He sauntered toward me until I could feel his hot breath in my face.

“Why are you here? You need to stay away from my daughter, you hear me?”

“Sir, she’s here because-” JJ started.

“I don’t give a damn why she’s here. She’s already done enough damage to my family. I don’t want her anywhere near Jayana. Ever again,” Todd said, enunciating each word carefully. He grabbed the back of my neck and pulled me towards him, so that he could whisper his next words in my ear. “If I ever see you again, or your existence causes any more problems for my family than it already has, I will hunt you down and kill you without hesitation.” He released my neck with force, practically throwing my head away from his. He opened the door leading to Jayana’s room, giving me one last fiery glance before shutting it behind him. I’d almost forgotten the rest of the team’s presence until I felt a hand on my back. I looked up into Emily’s eyes.

“See? I told you that was the general consensus.” I didn’t give her time to respond because I crossed my arms and forced myself to walk past JJ and Morgan and Hotch and Reid and Rossi to get to the exit. “I’ll meet you at the jet.”

# # # # # # # # # # # # #

I waited for about 20 minutes before the rest of the team arrived. I only had one bag of stuff that I kept with me at all times, so it wasn’t like I had to do any quick packing. They all arrived together.

“What the hell was that?” Derek asked as he quickly got out of the driver’s seat. That seemed to be the only thing he knew how to say to me.

“Back off,” Emily said.

“What? You're not the least bit curious as to why that guy hated her?”

“A lot of guys hate me,” I interjected.

Prentiss continued on like I hadn’t said anything. “Look, I just think that-”

“Both of you, stop it,” Rossi interrupted.

“All I’m saying is that I think we should get an answer,” Derek said, stubborn and persistent as always.

“You want an answer?” I offered, switching my focus to Prentiss. “The tattoo on my finger? It’s to symbolize that I’ve killed someone. Not only that, but I’ve killed high ranking, important people, and I’ve killed quite a few of them. I’ve caused plenty of trouble, and you’re profilers. You do the math,” I stated, somehow keeping control over my voice. I was shutting down and pushing them away like I did everyone else. It was easier that way. “So are we going to board the jet, or not?” They all looked at each other, mouths sewn shut, then slowly climbed the steps to the jet, closing the door behind them.

[siiinfvl]

ooc. mic test.   hello.   anybody home ??   is this working ??   

HI !!!   i know, i know. some of you are either going,   ‘ who tf is this potato ?? ’   or    ‘ huh. didn’t know she was still alive. ’   or don’t care at all. but surprise !!!    i am actually still alive. 

i’m aware that it’s been about half a year, or maybe more, since the last time i have properly been here. and considering that i didn’t really post a hiatus notice, it just seems like i dropped off the face of the earth and would never be coming back. but to those who are wondering, bless your souls, you wonderful, caring people. i am still here. i do still lurk around, like some stuff, check out what’s been going on while i was gone. 

basically, like always, i’ve just been very busy with work. nothing new, i know. but recently, in the past two months, i have been missing writing here. don’t get me wrong, i’ve never stopped writing and never really disconnected with my muse. i’ve mostly been on discord, mainly writing with @shewassoferal. and even sometimes opening a word document to write some back stories or simple paragraphs from prompts, all for grant ward. 

but, like i said, i have been missing writing here. or even just being here in general. that being said, i am on the verge of a decision. this blog, as of today, is officially being REVAMPED. now, what happens after the revamp, what you will see after the revamp, i still have not decided yet. and if anyone would put their two cents in, i’d really, really, really appreciate it very much as it would help me make my decision. 

there are three ways this could go, and here they are: 

OPTION 001. i can revamp the page. remodel the theme, revisit my tags, update all the character pages, such as the verses, the biography page and whatnot, all to have a fresh feel to the blog in order to help this restart take off. 

post-revamp will then include rechecking all the memes on my inbox and working on them. i am well aware i have maybe half a hundred various items in my inbox raging from random starters or memes sent by you guys that i owe you. basically, what happens after revamp is that i’ll have to drop the ongoing threads as just thinking about them is already pressuring me a lot. for those who have a running thread with me and would like to continue, please let me know and we can maybe start a new thread along that same timeline and plot line, so we can keep interacting. now all those open starters and memes that i have yet to respond to, i will write those. since i have not posted those before, they still have a pretty solid fresh feel to me, even though they’ve been there for about half a year. again, my apologies on that, you guys. you know i love you and i really appreciate the stuff you write for me. life has just been hard recently. 

bottomline is that option one means i’ll do a sweep of old stuff, keep working on what feels new, and go back to what this blog was half a year ago, before my unannounced hiatus.

OPTION 002. this one entails that the blog will become a database blog. what does that mean ??   it means i’d revamp the whole page, complete all character pages that give information about the muse. update the verses, rules, bio, tag pages. 

and with that completed, my roleplaying will be moved to discord. i’m not sure if you guys still write there, but i do. and if anyone wants to write with me there, we can. does that mean this blog will be dead ??    no.   i would still be posting here. back stories, metas, gifsets and photosets will still be posted here. i will still be posting memes as well, and if we haven’t plotted or interacted before, you’re free to send a meme, so we can check the dynamic between our muses, and we can plot based off of that. and once it’s all fleshed out, i’d probably ask if we could move it over to discord. of course, you can say no. if it’s more advisable for you to be here, i can be here. 

basically, this option just means that there will be less activity here than option one as most activity will be on discord. 

OPTION 003. now, this one is a bit heavier. i do understand that it’s been a long time since i have been here. a lot of the people i used to interact with might have even left already. the muse hasn’t been on the show for three seasons now, and just fyi, i am no longer watching the show. apart from that, i know that there are, at least, a couple of other grant ward blogs that have remained active while i was gone. beautifully-written, beautifully-shaped grant ward muses that i hearteye every time i see on my dash. this means that my heart is at ease in the fact that the character is still getting the love and the understanding he deserves that, sadly enough, the show did not give him. i am at ease in the fact that there are still amazing writers out there that are lending voice to this character that we did not get to hear the real voice of in the show. 

with that said, option three entails that this blog will no longer participate in roleplaying. does this mean this blog will die or be deleted ??    hell, no.   i still love the muse and the character and the actor too much to do that. so what’s gonna happen is that there will be no roleplaying, but any metas, gifsets, photosets will still be posted here. considering that i also still have a lot of ideas in mind that i’d like to write in order to expand on grant’s PHOENIX verse   ( which is his main verse, where he put up his fake hydra to destroy it from the inside and made it his own organization once hydra has been fully destroyed --------- all in the name of his definition of closure. for kara, and himself )   and depending on how things go, i might even put up a separate blog for PHOENIX. you guys have no idea how big that world has become in my head despite not getting to post about it much here. @shewassoferal can, once again, attest to that. you might see some fanfics being posted as well.

so, all in all, while i might say goodbye to the world of roleplaying on this blog, you still will not be saying goodbye to me permanently. awwww. i will still be around, and if you wanna write something together, maybe collab on something, i’m just here, you can let me know, and we’ll work it out.

that’s the dilemma i’m on right now. i have not decided which track this blog is going to take. mainly because while i want to go one way, i’m not sure if it’s even possible because, like i said, i do understand that i have been absent for a long time and people might not even want to write with me anymore. so i need your help in deciding. i need to know where this blog stands, and i need your assistance. 

in case i don’t receive any response, the default will be the third option. but if you still want to write with me, and one of the first two options appeal to you, then you can let me know, and i’ll work on it right away.

each and every one of your opinions matter to me. so if there’s even just one person that chose either one of the first two options, the third one is already out of the running, which means i’ll be back. the decision between options 1 and 2 will then be decided based on how many people are willing to do it with me. 

thank you very much if you’ve reached this part. i appreciate you reading all of it. you are a rockstar !!!

[swanderful1]

A Cold Awakening: Ch 20/25

Summary: Modern crime AU. Twenty years have gone by since Storybrooke was shaken to the core by a gruesome crime that went unsolved. Sheriff David Nolan and his partner, daughter Emma are forced to revisit the crime. At the same time, Killian Jones and his older brother Liam have been drawn back to the town they had longed to never see again, struggling to find their own answers. As taunting notes and clues show up they are taken on a journey to finally bring justice for the Jones family. And Emma Nolan finds herself caught in a situation more dangerous than she could have ever imagined.

Notes: Hello all! First, once again thank you to @shady-swan-jones for the lovely banner for my story!!!!! Still hype about it. Time for anotha chapter! Took me a while (again). This update in particular is brought to you by: your continued support as readers, an entire box of cheez its, and my 90s hits playlist on REPEAT.Thank you so much for reading and I hope you enjoy!

Read the whole thang on AO3 or FFnet 

Disclaimer: I own nothing, all rights to OUAT

Rating: M

Word Count: ~9100

Emma’s limbs were like spaghetti noodles. Loose and limp from spending the night with Killian. One would assume that meant waking up the next morning she wouldn’t still have the urge to go another round but… that assumption was wrong. There was something very intimate to her about spending a morning laying naked in a bed with him. An indulgence she hadn’t allowed herself with nearly anyone else. In fact, if he were anyone else she would be scurrying to dress and leave before the other person woke. Not wanting to deal, at all, with the messiness of a morning after. But Killian wasn’t anyone else, he was him. And that was enough for her to stay. Especially after the events of the past few days. Killian’s ex-girlfriend having turned out to not be who she said she was, Emma was feeling particularly defensive of the man sleeping behind her. She had actively done almost all she could to protect him and his heart that he had so trustingly given to Emma, but there were was only so much she could do.

There was a faint trace of light coming through the drapes over the windows, so it was some version of morning. Glancing at the clock on the nightstand it read 5:00 am. Too early. But her body was warm, thanks to the man sleeping behind her with his arm draped comfortably over her waist. Killian’s even breathing indicating he was still fast asleep. Another part of him, however, was wide awake. Digging into her bare backside she felt his hardened member up for the day.

She had a few different routes she could take with this. Either she could lay there and (attempt to) fall quietly back to sleep until it wasn’t so early. She could wake Killian so she wasn’t just lying there by herself, painfully aware of his arousal, gaining one of her own. But then she had another idea. Excitement running through her, Emma sank down beneath the covers, sliding out of Killian’s arms slowly so as not to wake him just yet. He stirred a bit once she was fully out of his grasp but otherwise remained asleep.

Now completely under the covers Emma took hold of Killian’s erect cock. The vein beneath her fingers, the soft feel of his flesh. Without much more delay Emma licked a stripe up the length of him. Slowly, deliberately, excitement and adrenaline fueling her as she wondered how long it would take before he woke. Swirling her tongue around the tip she felt him move a bit, still asleep, hopefully in the midst of a filthy dream about her. She often dreamt of him, though she never really told him that. Mostly because a lot of that dreaming had started occurring well before anything sexual actually happened between them in real life (i.e. the one where her subconscious had depicted him as Captain Hook, tying her up. Fucking her with his mouth and metal hand extension).

Taking a deep breath she brought herself back to the moment, if she kept allowing her mind to wander to those places she would come before Killian did. Slowly, her mouth covered his cock, taking almost the full length. Nearly bottoming out at the back of her throat, she began moving her head up and down, her tongue drawing circles along the surface as she moved. Her lips taking in the taste of his skin, wet mouth dragging. It’s after a few seconds of this that she feels Killian’s entire body stiffen. He was awake.

“Emma… what are you-, love...” he moaned. The sound of her name never sounding so good as it did coming from his mouth. Emma herself stiffened a bit, realizing how aroused she was as well. It only fueled her more, her mouth worked more aggressively now. Not quite so scared to wake him she wasn’t gentle, taking his cock as far into her mouth as it would go. Alternating between licking, sucking, rubbing. The more she did the shakier his legs became, giving into her touch she herself moaned and reached her hand down to take care of herself as she took care of Killian.

His cock began to pulse, impending release near, making Emma even more aggressive. Her teeth coming out to scrape the sides of his shaft, causing his legs to convulse and his hand to tightly grip her hair. Her other hand works the dripping wet folds at her center. The affect she has on him feeding her own desires. She’s close, so is he. And within a few more movements of her tongue and mouth he’s coming. Hot, wet, salty release moving down her throat as she sucks him dry of his seed. Not long after she crests and has a euphoric orgasm, all the while keeping her mouth attached to him until he’s finished.

When Emma emerged from underneath the covers she looked at Killian. His face a mixture of bewilderment, satisfaction, and something she’d rarely seen in a sexual partner before. Love. She gives him a smirk as she wipes his seed from the corners of her mouth with the back of her arm. And then one by one licked her fingers clean of her own release. The mix of the two in her mouth causing an interesting taste. One that she wants to share with him. His eyes never stray from her, even letting out a groan as he watches. Leaning down over top of Killian, straddling her bare body over top of his, she meets his mouth. Her tongue moving with his so he can taste as well. What they tasted like together.

“Good morning,” she whispered against his mouth as he growled in response.

“Now what in the world did I do to deserve that?” he mumbled, a dumb smile on his face when she pulled her head away from his just a few inches. His dark hair pushed from his head standing on all ends. There was an almost youthful glow to him in the moment and Emma couldn’t help but smile.

“Do I really need a reason to wake you up that way?”

“Of course not, love.” His eyes were still heavy, presumably both from just waking up and what he woke up to. “You won’t hear a complaint from me.”

“I would hope not.”

“Unless of course you’ve deemed that a ‘one time thing’?” His eyebrow went up expectantly. Though it certainly wasn’t a one time thing.

She answered him by kissing him again. Simply savoring in the morning with him where she could do whatever she wanted to him. His hands reached up to cradle the sides of her face and she ached at the touch.

“What do you like to eat, Emma?” he asked between kisses. It seemed highly off topic given the activities of a few minutes ago. She didn’t say anything for a while, her hands moving around the hair on his chest, playing with it as she continued to kiss him.

“Besides grilled cheese and my cock?” He was so ridiculous but for whatever reason Emma completely enjoyed his flirty and sometimes obscene remarks. He was clever, she loved that about him.

“What if that’s all I like?” she whispered against his ear, nibbling on the lobe, getting whiff of his hair. Jesus he always smelled amazing. Particularly this morning when he smelled like the lavender bath oils they had used the night before...

“Because. I meant it when I said I’d like to take you on a proper date. And I want it to be something you enjoy.”

She was stunned, pulling her face away from his to look into his blue, blue eyes. Sincerity. That was all she saw now. Well, and how handsome he was but that was a pretty consistent thing. The mention of a date, a real live adult date was intimidating. She hadn’t been on one she actually enjoyed in so long. But there was a large part of the idea that excited her. Getting to go out in public with him, sitting across a table from him, tasting each other’s entrees, sipping overpriced glasses of wine. She could picture it, and in her mind could hardly suppress the grin that came from the image. Killian seemed to release a breath, as if he still wasn’t sure if she would run or not at the mention of moving forward together.

“I’m not picky,” she said, reaching out to touch his cheek. Savoring in the warmth of his face beneath her palm.

“Good.” He smiled back. Pulling her hand from his face and beginning to caress it with his lips. “How about Thursday night then?”

She relished in the touch of his lips, her stomach filled with butterflies she almost forgot to answer him.

“Thursday for what?” she groaned, obviously distracted.

“For dinner…” he continued kissing her, licking, nipping at her skin. “And dessert.”

“How could I say no to that?”

“Please don’t,” he whispered, his accent thick between tongue movements.

“Let me think about it…” she teased. And when he jokingly bit a part of her neck she let out a giggle. “Okay, okay, Thursday. A real date.”

He stopped his nibbling to look into her eyes. Quite possibly to see if she was still toying with him. She wasn’t. It was only Monday morning, and Thursday night was so far from now. Any host of things could happen between now and then but she didn’t care about any of that.

“After all, you are quite persuasive…” she said, biting her lip. Back to teasing. He softened, taking her chin in his hand and pulling her face toward his.

“And devilishly handsome,” he said before diving in again to plant bites and kisses all over her body.

They went on like that for a while. Rolling over top of each other, switching dominant positions. Taking their time playing with one another. It wasn’t long before Emma felt her core ache for him, more urgently than it kind of always was, and she clenched her thighs together to keep from getting too carried away. But when once again she found herself on top of him she kissed down the soft skin of his neck, she noticed he had stopped nipping at her and remained ultimately still. Though his hands still rested on her hips.

“Killian… what’s…?” she began to ask pulling away from his neck, following his gaze to where it rested. The mirror. The floor length one across from the bed. Which from this angle gave a perfect view of her on top of him from behind. Her legs straddled across him, her ass bare, hair hanging down her back. He was watching her.

“There isn’t an inch of you that I don’t find alluring, Emma,” he whispered. Still not taking his eyes off of hers in the reflection of the mirror. She blushed, knowing he was telling the truth. And that she felt exactly the same way about him. He was so verbal during sex, or even just building up to sex. It was all the more stimulating to her.

“Why don’t we try something new…” she whispered, knowing he had his eye on that mirror. And fucking to her own reflection was something she had all but avoided her entire life. The idea of watching herself in the throes of passion not necessarily a sight she was comfortable with. But with Killian… she was open to it. And if she were able to focus on him instead of herself, maybe it wouldn’t be so odd.

“What did you have in mind?” he asked, turning her head away from the mirror and back to face his.

“I was thinking… that I could watch you fuck me…” Emma licked her way down his chest tasting the salt and lavender on his skin. It was enticing all on its own. His chest. “In the mirror.”

He hesitated, his breath catching in the back of his throat as Emma caught one of his nipples between her teeth and tugged. “Emma… love, are you certain that’s how you want it?”

She sat up again, trying to ignore the shake in his body as she released her mouth’s clutches on him. Emma fluttered her long lashes, cheeks and skin flushed with arousal, hair messy from both the night before and this morning, her bare center wet with desire and resting on his erect cock. She rolled her hips over him, causing his eyes to close as he winced. Emma’s eyebrow went up.. Knowing he would probably love nothing more than to fuck her as they both watched in the mirror’s reflection, knowing she loved that idea as well.

“Do I look like I want anything else?” a dirty grin on her face lighting a fire inside Killian that she could physically see come to flames behind his eyes. Before she knew it he had flipped her off of his lap, now she was on all fours, staring at herself in the mirror. He rose to his knees behind her so she could see him as well. A predatory look on his face like he could pounce at any moment, Emma felt her arousal grow the longer she met his eyes in the mirror.

“I’m going to take you from behind…” he said in a smooth and even voice. As if he wasn’t as affected as she was. Meanwhile she felt his already hardened cock pressed firmly against her, teasing her entrance.

“What exactly are you waiting for?” she asked in an almost breathy tone, trying to keep calm but realizing she became more and more turned on with each passing moment.

Without saying anything else he swatted her ass with his palm. Waves of both pleasure and pain coursing through her. It wasn’t exactly great incentive to behave if that was the punishment. A smirk was on his face as his hand moved from her ass to her slick, wet folds that were now even more so.

“Eager for me, as always, my darling.” In slipped one finger followed quickly by another, she ground her back into his front needing more. Needing absolutely all of him to fill her. “I can hardly call myself a gentleman if I keep a woman waiting.”

Emma let out a chuckle. Thinking of Killian right now as anywhere near a gentleman was almost comical. He had his moments of chivalry, but any of those were often canceled out by the brutal and passionate sexual encounters he and Emma engaged in.

She was so lost in the feel of his fingers hooking inside of her, hitting the spot that would eventually be her undoing, that she didn’t realize her eyes had closed. In fact, they remained that way until Killian removed his fingers when she was just about to climax and her whole body shook with disappointment. Until the rough feel of his beard on her shoulder brought her back and she opened her eyes again to face the reflection in the mirror.

“Remember, love, eyes open. I want you to watch,” he whispered before moving her hair to one side and taking a bite out of the back of her shoulder, rising up to his knees again. “God you’re so gorgeous like this.” He mumbled before lining himself up with her center.

“Ohhh…” she moaned as he slid into her, he did it slowly. Tortuously, not like the night before when they had been so desperate for the friction. She looked up at his face, very serious but also there was a level of caution there. He had never taken her from behind this way, and without another word she gave him a look to indicate she was okay to continue. That she had adjusted to his size and he could keep going. She wouldn’t break. At that, his grip on her hips tightened and he eased into her, taking his time before getting into a smooth rhythm. Emma moving her body along with his in fluid motions, causing her whole body to pulse.

“So tight like this, Emma,” he urged, quickening the pace ever so slightly the more his cock dragged against her inner walls. Emma’s back arched to keep him inside of her just a millisecond longer.

“Killian…. so good. Please…” The closer she came to her peak the more hooded her eyes became and the more frequent she felt her lids falling. Each time though she remembered to reopen them, to look at Killian. To experience the excitement of watching as he fucked her from behind.

“That’s it, darling. Beg,” he cooed in her ear followed by a slew of filthy promises that fell from his lips as Killian continued to grind in and out of her. With each thrust she came closer to her release, feeling herself become full with him. It was unlike anything else. To experience the throbbing heat resulting from their connection. It could only be compared to magic, the way they knew how to please each other so expertly and so intimately. Almost like they had been doing it for years as opposed to months. In another life perhaps they had been lovers in the same way, drawing the most exquisite of pleasures out of one another.

Emma felt her limbs grow weak with exertion the closer she was to her climax. Killian must have sensed this because at the last moment he pulled her up to him and supported most of her weight. Barely keeping her eyes open, she watched as Killian held her to him, not ever losing his place inside of her, and thrusting in and out as her walls clenched around him. She could see his handsome face in the mirror, looking dangerously close to his peak as well. His eyes hooded dark with desire for her. Her confidence surged and she pushed back against him, giving them both more leverage. Their bodies coated with sweat, his breath in her ear, his name on her lips. Their breath so ragged and abrupt their brutal pace followed along with the tempo of it.

“Emma….” he moaned. “Fall, love. I’ve got you.”

His rough hands beneath hers tightened around her hips, they fell together. Physically and metaphorically. Emma’s heart raced as she pushed stray hair off of her face.

In the wake of their passion, Emma could hardly contain her now shaking body. It was still so early, the sun had not even fully risen yet. But she was already thoroughly fucked. Killian’s warm body behind her felt limp as well and before Emma knew what was happening they had both collapsed to the bed. Sweat covered bodies and limbs tangled together, the two laid on the soft down comforter.

“I can’t seem to get enough of you, love,” Killian whispered as he peppered kisses down her body. Emma’s core tensed knowing if he kept up with this they would end up going at it with minimal break time. Again.

“You’re not so bad yourself,” she said, turning in his arms so she faced him now and his mouth ceased the kisses just to steal a glance at her. His hand moved from her waist to her hair, wrapping strands of long, blonde curls around his fingers. Weaving them in and out, all the while looking at her like she had hung the moon.

“It’s hard to fathom that when I first came back to town I found you to be an astoundingly irritating lass.” He rolled onto his back, folding his left arm underneath his head and leaving his right arm in Emma’s hair.

“I know,” she said, Emma had felt similarly after first being reunited with him. The dark, infuriating, uncooperative man he was. The day they fought right in front of everyone’s view in the conference room. Her blood had boiled, and in an entirely different way than it did when they spoke now. “The feeling was mutual. I couldn’t stand you.”

“I can’t imagine why.” His eyebrow went up. He knew why.

“In fairness the first actual encounter I had with you was when you drunkenly hit on me in a bar… I wouldn’t exactly consider that behavior to be boyfriend material.” The second she said the word she realized it had never come out before in reference to him.

He smirked, obviously noticing the implication as well, “I see. And when exactly did that change for you?”

The question caught her off guard. The resentment they had felt for each other at the beginning of the investigation felt so, so long ago. And to be honest now, as she was naked on his bed wrapped in his arms, it was hard to imagine a time when she didn’t feel the way she felt now. Which was enamored with affection for the complicated soul, whose hands felt like heaven running through her hair.

“The day you took me to your father’s old car that he wrecked.” She was certain it was that time. Killian’s vulnerability coming out, his willingness to help her instead of halt her in the search. “How about you?”

He paused for a long while, the silent bedroom engulfing them. Emma thought perhaps his day was the same as hers, that he had begun feeling differently about her when he decided to show her a part of his past that had never been brought to light. Finally, he said, “That day in the book shop.”

Emma remembered that day, but it hardly been anything overwhelmingly groundbreaking. At least not for her. They had agreed to a truce. Her mother had met Killian. The whole thing had seemed so… ordinary compared to the excitement and dramatics that had occurred in the months following that day.

“It was the first time I thought perhaps we could get along.” He rolled back over to face her again. “Without being in that police station and the investigation and returning to a town I hated growing up, in that bookshop we just felt like two people meeting under normal circumstances.”

His fingers moved from her hair to her face, brushing a soft touch across the flesh of her cheek. His thumb rested just below her bottom lip and he smiled ever so slightly when she eased into his touch.

“You have to remember, darling, I’m used to being the boss. My career, I call all of the shots. I oversee hundreds of people. Having someone in charge of me, and demanding things of me, especially about such a deeply personal thing… I just didn’t take to it well.”

They were two alphas, both used to being in some sort of control of everything. Of course they buttheads at the beginning. Until they both learned how to be around someone else as similar.

“I know.” Emma reached out and brushed the stubble on his face. The rub of the hair massaging her fingertips and palm. “I’m not used to anyone challenging me. Especially not at work.”

“We’re awfully stubborn.”

“Yeah. To a fault even.”

“I wouldn’t go that far, love. I’ve grown to find it quite attractive in you.”

“Really?” Emma was surprised. Most men found it to be so unappealing. Hence why she ultimately kept them out of her personal life. She wasn’t willing to soften that about herself. Well… about certain things. For all intents and purposes right now Killian Jones could get her to do just about anything.

“Really.” He smiled, a bit bashful now. Emma felt his cheeks warm underneath her lingering touch. “At a point I became so frustrated because I wanted you so badly but couldn’t have you.”

Meanwhile she had felt the same. He could have had her at any point.

“I got to know you, Emma. I mean really know you, which doesn’t strike me as a luxury you grant many people.” He smirked, as if remembering some encounter in his head that they had shared. “The glimpses you showed me of who you are… I selfishly wanted more.”

“I wasn’t all that willing to share you either, Killian. You had to have known there was something…” she laughed. “That time at Target when that woman tried to pay for your groceries… I was not having it.”

She had moved that item divider too quickly for it to pass as nonchalant.

“Aye, love. I might have picked up on that…” He winked. “Then there was that kiss…. The time you showed up here and I felt like perhaps we would both be able to accept what was happening between us.”

Emma knew what happened next, the part of this story where she ran from him.

“That day you were going on a date… I saw you at the police station and I could hardly keep it together. The idea of another man taking you out and enjoying your company. It drove me mad.”

“That was when you decided to show up at my office that night.” She almost knew exactly what he had been thinking when he surprised her that night. Toying with her, teasing her, bringing her to the absolute crest of pleasure before leaving her alone on that desk. She felt her body warm just thinking of it.

“Aye, love. I wasn’t sure you would go along with it… being as bold a move as it was. But when you did I… there was no going back for me.”

“Had you planned that for a while?”

“No. I mean I had thought of you. A lot. You’re an impossibly appealing woman, Emma. Even when you’re yelling at me. But at the thought of another man entering your life when I wanted to be there instead, well, I became a bit reckless.”

“A bit?”

“No one else has ever had this effect on me. It was something so out of character I could hardly believe myself that I went through with it… with any of this with you.” His face still looked overwhelmed, like he couldn’t fathom that they were even lying here together. Naked. On his bed.

“I know the feeling, Killian. I’ve never known anyone like you.” She could hardly believe they were in this position as well. However, it was real. She could feel his warm body pressed to hers. His fingers, moving through her long hair. His breath was so near to her face. The evidence of their most recent act of debauchery drying on the insides of her thighs.

“Quite the pair, aren’t we?”

She stilled a bit, at the mention of them being a pair. Were they a pair? Were they exclusive? Where was this going? Did it matter? Should she have him make a Powerpoint presentation? Her mind asked a thousand questions. And apparently it was all over her face because with the utmost of care Killian took her face in his hands and kissed her forehead.

“Emma you have to know, unless you aren’t already aware and I haven’t been clear enough, it’s only you that I’ve been with for a while.” His thumb stroked just beneath her lip. “Exclusively you, darling.”

She was a little surprised still that he read her so well. But really was it actually that surprising at all? “I haven’t been with anyone but you since… well since you came back to Storybrooke.”

Emma was a little embarrassed to admit it, seeing as how for the first few weeks he was here the two weren’t even on great speaking terms. But it was still nice to know he hadn’t been with anyone either. As fucking gorgeous as Killian was, it had been only her. “I was with Henry’s father for a long time, and then no one else really stood out to me after that. Until you. And anyone in between… it was simply physical.”

Killian smiled before leaning over to press a soft kiss to Emma’s lips. If for no other reason than the simple fact that they could.

“With you though, Killian it’s more than physical. It’s… chemical....”she said as he tugged Emma’s body even closer to his as the kiss grew deeper and his tongue parted the gap in her lips. The tingle reaffirming what she already knew.

“How much longer do I have with you?” Killian mumbled against her mouth. It was a good question, and for a second Emma wasn’t sure whether he was talking about this morning or forever. She decided he was most likely referring to the former but the latter was a discussion that would have to come at some point.

“Relax, it’s only 6 am.” Emma’s lips moved down to his neck, one of her favorite places on his body to kiss. Feeling the pulsing vein beneath her mouth quicken at her touch.

“It’s hard to relax, love, when you’re using your mouth like that.” His body was tense as she moved around him. Memorizing every mark on his skin, the feel of his arms on her waist, the way his lip twitched slightly before he smiled.

Emma crawled on top of him, it was beginning to be a hobby of hers, ready to get lost with him again when her phone rang.

“Christ…” Killian said as his hands stopped their movements along Emma’s bare body. Her head fell into his chest. Knowing she had to get up and answer.

“I’ve got to get that,” she muttered, extremely unhappy to have to tear herself away from the task at hand (well… mouth).

“I wagered.” Killian stared straight up at the ceiling. Eyes closed, attempting to cool himself off.

When Emma crossed the room and reached her phone the caller ID said it was her father. Her heart sank a little, knowing he probably wouldn’t call this early on a Monday morning if it wasn’t something work related.

“Hello?” she said, swiping to answer. A knot in her stomach.

“Em, I need you to come down to the station as soon as you can… it’s urgent.” Her dad sounded highly on edge. Knowing he wasn’t an alarmist she became more concerned. What could it possibly be that warranted this kind of reaction from David Nolan. “It’s Gold, Emma. He escaped his holding cell last night.”

“What? How?” Emma was a bit floored, hearing horror stories of escaped prisoners on the news before but never having actually experienced it. This man was dangerous, and he had slipped through their clutches.

“Just come down to the station. I’m about to bring everyone in for a briefing before we get to work on catching him. He couldn’t have gotten far, all of the town’s borders have been secured.”

“But time is of the essence.” Emma nibbled on her lip, anxious to get Gold back where he was best (behind fucking bars). “I’ll be down there as soon as I can. I’ve got to call mom and have her pick up Henry though.”

“Alright. See you soon.” David quickly hung up the phone, sounding just about as nervous as Emma was. Then she looked across the room to where Killian had stood and began dressing himself to take his dog out. He already knew she had to leave. Time was something that was just rarely on their side.

“I have to go,” Emma said, all urgency leaving her body when she realized she had to interrupt their morning. It was an odd feeling, one that was completely unfamiliar to her. A longing to just stay put and to savor in the excitement of wasting time with someone. “Duty calls.”

“Everything alright, love?” Killian looked concerned, approaching her as if she were made of crystal.

“Yeah, fine. Just something came up at work. I need to go in early.”

“Is there anything I can do?” Killian’s eyes sparkled with concern. She was so used to just telling him everything, that leaving him in the dark felt almost… wrong. Emma thought of all they had overcome thus far in such early stages of their relationship and decided it would be okay to tell him. The town would have to be notified anyway that there was a wanted criminal running around.

“Just, lay low for today. Gold is… well he’s gone. Apparently escaped last night. I don’t know much more. It will get out eventually but just keep quiet for now and I’ll tell you more as I can.” She hoped he would understand, wouldn’t judge her harshly for the lack of elaboration.

“Alright, Emma,” he said gently, tucking her hair behind her ear. She could tell he wanted to say more. Probably overwhelmingly concerned that she was now leaving his company to go on a man hunt for the person responsible for his parents’ death. Her whole being ached and she wished she could stay. He pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead. “Sometimes I find myself so happy with you that I forget the circumstances we’re under.”

“I know what you mean.” And she did, it was so easy to forget when they were in their love bubble. “I’ll do everything I can to help you and Liam have a bit of peace with this. If that’s even possible to do..”

“I thought about hiring a private investigator… so many times in those twenty years. But the way everything was so botched the first time around with the case I was too scared. But then the prospect of answers became scarier than not knowing so I used to think I would never have closure with it. But you’ve done so much, Emma.”

“I didn’t do it alone, you know.” She remembered all of the times he had offered his help, and he would do it again right now she was sure of it. But the fact was, Gold was out there (so was his ex-wife) and the less Killian was directly involved the better. She smiled up at him, doing her best to silently reassure him that she would be okay. But he still looked wary.

“It’s not something I’m used to…” he said after a few quiet seconds. His arms were loosely wrapped around her naked body as they stood there. Too stubborn to let go of each other.

“What?”

“Normally I’m the one that has to leave abruptly in the morning for work.” He chuckled.

“Does it make you feel cheap?” she joked.

“Aye, a bit.” He smiled, and she wished it was a permanent fixture on his face. Not that the cranky, brooding smolder he had trademarked wasn’t attractive. It was just nice when he laughed.

“Well, hopefully soon this won’t have to happen anymore.”

Emma pulled out of his grasp and began to dress herself. She knew if she continued to stand within their orbit she would get too distracted, and right now she needed to focus. Gold was gone, Milah was Grace, and they still didn’t nail down the person who had been sending the clues. Somehow those two had to be connected, she knew it was too crazy to be a coincidence that the same woman who had been married to Gold ended up dating Killian for several YEARS. However, Emma lost her focus after she had put her underwear, jeans, bra, and shoes back on to realize that the tank top she had worn over to Killian’s last night was ripped to shreds from their passionate encounter.

“Um… Killian…” She held up the material, torn and unwearable. Doing her best to look pissed off but actually a bit flushed thinking of how it had come to be ripped. “I’m going to need to borrow a shirt.”

He smirked, and walked over to his closet which was lined with suits and dress shirts and business attire. She had never met a man who had more clothes than Killian.

“I appreciate the look of disgust, darling, but I don’t recall you being this displeased when that scrap of fabric was being torn from your body last night.” He didn’t even look back at her as he carded through the rows of dress shirts. Eventually he selected a plain, light blue shirt that matched his eyes and probably looked gorgeous on him. Emma held it up to her, it was a tad bit long but it might fit her enough.

“It’ll have to do I suppose,” she said as she took it from the hanger and began to slip it on. “Since a wild animal decided to destroy my shirt.” She locked eyes with him as she buttoned the front.

Killian stepped close to her, taking over the task and slowly slipping each button into it’s slot without losing her gaze. When he finished, he straightened the collar, and bent down to place a kiss on her lips, then her cheek, then her neck before reaching her ear to whisper, “I’d do it again in a heartbeat.”

Emma shivered, at the mere mention of him taking her again in such a heated way. Why couldn’t she just stay kept in his bed all day? Engaging in all kinds of… activities. No responsibilities beyond making each other come. But her life wasn’t that simple, and neither was his. So while she wished she could allow him to make good on his promise to rip her clothes off again, she knew she had a job to do.

“I have to go,” she moaned, pulling her neck away from his lips so she could just focus on the pools of his eyes. Which probably was not any less distracting.

“Be safe. If anything happens to you, I don’t know that I… you’re so good at your job and you’re perfectly fit to take care of yourself but just don’t forget about the people on the other side who love you.”

“Oh? And who would that be?”

“Your son… your parents…”

“You,” she whispered before planting an all too quick kiss on his lips.The mood turning serious from playful, yet again.

“Ah yes, I fall into that category of people as well, my love,” he whispered back, “Just… come back to me, Emma. In one piece.”

“Of course,” she said as his lips were on hers one last time, desperate. But quick. And he pulled away reluctantly. To let her go.

When Emma arrived at the station, it had only been about half an hour since her father had called to alert her of Gold’s escape but it had felt like an eternity. Leaving Killian’s hotel felt more painful than it should have, given the freshness of their romance but everything with them seemed to break all expectation of what a normal relationship was.

She had called Mary Margaret from the car, telling her mother to pick up Henry from his friend’s house when he awoke. After all, it was barely seven in the morning on summer vacation. He wouldn’t be awake for quite some time. And Emma didn’t know when she would be available to leave her job. Neal was all but exempt from the investigation at this point but it would hardly be wise to put Henry in the care of his father when Gold was on the loose. Extra security from Boston was currently on the way to Storybrooke to guard Neal’s apartment just in case his father tried anything stupid. If Emma had to guess though, now that Gold had gotten out of police custody he would certainly take every opportunity to leave town.

The office was abuzz with activity. All hands were on deck. The main room smelling like a mixture of coffee and stress, a scent Emma was entirely too familiar with at this point in her life.

“Em, you’re here, great.” David greeted her when she walked in, handing her a warm to-go cup of coffee. If he noticed the shirt on her back was a man’s he said absolutely nothing about it. Thank the Lord. “We’re meeting in a few minutes to lay out the game plan. First search team has already been dispatched.”

“Okay, what do you need me to do?” she was back in cop mode. It happened almost instantly when she knew an important task at her job needed to be completed.

“Just get ready to meet with the team. Grab all of your resources. Pull some ideas together to brainstorm. I’ve got a few, Graham and the Boston team do as well. We need all the points of view we have.”

“Got it,” she said, taking a sip of her coffee and making her way to her desk. David was off in a flash, presumably to alert everyone to be in the conference room as soon as possible. Emma was gathering some files she had stuffed in her desk, trying to determine the best plan of action but halted when she felt she was being watched.

Looking up from her mess of a desk she realized she was right. Ruby stood a few feet from her, an interesting smile on her best friend’s face.

“What?” Emma asked, curious to see where this was going.

“You know, women’s shirts have the buttons on the left side…” Ruby smirked.

Emma looked down at Killian’s shirt she was wearing. She had tucked it into her jeans so that it wouldn’t look like the shirt was as big on her as The buttons, indeed, on the right side. The sleeves were also cuffed revealing Killian’s embroidered initials on the interior of the fabric. He was such a diva. Emma rolled her eyes, half because of her curious friend and half because she would have to tease Killian about his labeled dress shirt cuffs later. Or whenever she saw him next…

“How is he taking all of this? First his parents then his ex turns out to be a liar. The poor guy,” Ruby asked. Not even bothering to dive further into the fact that Emma was sleeping with Killian but also sleeping AT Killian’s.

“He’s… okay. A bit worried that Gold’s out again, but that’s to be expected.” Emma’s heart tugged. The look of worry on his face she saw as she left his penthouse. The amount of lies and deception he had been fed his whole life she could hardly believe he was this trusting of her but he was. All the more reason she didn’t want to keep things from him. She must have been making a face at the thought of her morning because whatever it was Ruby picked up on her softened demeanor.

“Who would have guessed, Killian Jones would be the first guy to get you to make an actual commitment,” Ruby said. As annoyed as Emma was that this was the topic of conversation, it was hard to be annoyed with Ruby. Someone who had been by her side for as long as she could remember.

“Literally you, Ruby!” Emma remembered even before she herself knew she was interested in Killian her best friend had called her out on it. “You guessed it the whole time!”

“I did, didn’t I?” A look of pride came across Ruby’s face. They had caught up briefly on Saturday night. Watching movies and eating junk food with Henry. Ruby was, for the first time in a long time, in a very healthy and stable relationship. And the proof was all over the brunette’s face as she just seemed lighter. Happier. To finally have found someone who brought out the best in her as opposed to the worst.

“Ruby, Emma, conference room.” They were interrupted by the sound of Graham’s voice. Everyone was making their way into the conference room for the meeting.

The meeting was brief but effective. Gold was on the loose and they needed to catch him, plain and simple. Apparently during the changing of security last night was when he escaped from his holding cell. Via the use of a bent paper clip that had been hidden (somewhere on his person?). It was a grave mistake on the part of all of the officers involved. Ever since the discovery of Gold as the killer, the team had definitely softened. The idea that he was already caught so their jobs were mostly done allowing him to slip through the cracks. Emma herself was guilty of losing involvement. But right now she had to hunt for Gold. By the time she left the office the news of Gold’s escape had broken, she had to fight past all of the local news and reporters to get to her car.

Emma was beginning to see herself with Killian more and more with each passing day. And as exciting yet terrifying as that was she knew they would never truly be able to continue, he would never truly be able to heal, if his past wasn’t first taken care of. If there was no closure on the demons that had plagued he and his family for so long, Killian and Liam would never know justice to be reached for their parents. Then there was Neal, who had lost so much as well. First his mother when he was just a boy and now his father had turned out to have done such terrible things. Neal needed closure on the case as well. And if Emma was able to find Milah, and her connection to this saga, then maybe Neal could have peace answers to why his mother left him. Because Emma had a sneaking suspicion that there was more to Milah leaving than she knew. Then there was Henry who had, all his life, known nothing but kindness and harmony amongst all of the branches of his family who was now realizing that his grandfather was in no way a good man.

After the meeting the whole team was put to action. The perimeter of the town completely secured, as well as the shipping ports that led to the town. A census of all residents and ships was taken by local government. Helicopters flew above the normally quiet town in an effort to see if Gold had taken to hiding in the woods. Yellow caution tape decorated the normally all-green summer landscape. Time was so important, especially the first twelve hours when they had daylight on their side. Midday Emma had called Henry to check in, telling him she was alright and to stay with Mary Margaret until they caught Gold. By now it was out that he had gone missing, and a panic had come over the town. Worried for everyone’s safety Emma and her team did their absolute best to utilize their time.

But by nightfall no progress had been made despite the relentless search. Gold was as good as gone. Emma’s feet tired she and a few others headed back to the station to regroup and make an alternate plan for nightfall.

“I think we need to send people to Belle’s. Extra security in case Gold tries anything there,” Emma spoke up at the meeting. She had ulterior motives for the suggestion but that wasn’t important to disclose to everyone just yet.

David agreed. Looking at Emma expectantly for further suggestion.

“I can go,” she offered. “I’ll take Ruby. Give us one squad car.”

Ruby looked at Emma like she was crazy. But Emma would explain once they were underway.

“Em, we can send more than just one. There’s a few over there undercover right now for surveillance.” Graham looked skeptical, but didn’t push too hard.

“Listen, we don’t want an overwhelming police presence there. It isn’t necessary, send them home for rest. But we do need to have a few officers present at Gold’s old home to make sure Belle isn’t behind the liberation of her husband. And I think I’m pretty good at deciphering whether or not someone’s lying to me.”

After a lot more convincing, Emma and Ruby were in the squad car on their way over to Belle’s house. It had been under pseudo-house arrest (undercover squad cars a few hundred feet away) for some time now but nothing had come up that indicated Belle in anyway knew what her husband had been up to nearly 15 years before they even met. But that didn’t stop Emma from having her suspicions. Recalling the day they had found the murder weapon and arrested Gold. The discovery of the dagger coming almost entirely from Belle’s subtle suggestion. Ruby had been the only other person in the room with Emma and Belle that day. Therefore Emma thought her best to drag along.

On the way over Emma called Killian, part wanting to tell him Gold was still missing, part wanting to just hear his voice. But she would never admit that, even when Ruby gave her a knowing look from the passenger seat. Despite trying to keep the conversation as low key as possible, Emma still became a little sad when she had to hang up. But the subtle, “Call when you can and be safe, my love.” He said before hanging up gave her butterflies, motivating her to keep going.

“Emma would you mind telling me what in the world has gotten into you?” Ruby asked shortly after Emma hung up the phone and refocused on driving the squad car toward Belle’s house.

“I think Belle knew what Gold did to the Jones’,” Emma said matter of factly.

“And you think it’s urgent to handle this now because…?”

“She’s the key to finding Gold. Just like she was the key to proving he did the murder in the first place.”

Ruby crinkled her brow trying to decipher what Emma was getting at.

“Belle’s a smart girl, you and I both know that. If she was the one sending the clues and if she knew what her husband had done then she most certainly had all of her research together before she did something this bold. I’m not saying she helped him escape…. I know she wants him locked up. So I think we can get her to talk.”

“Emma that’s crazy! You’re going on blind intuition.” Ruby yelled as they pulled up the driveway to Belle’s house. The wind stilling to provide quiet surroundings. The only sound now was the crunch of Emma’s feet on the walkway.

“Is it that crazy? Isn’t that what’s gotten us this far in the first place? My ‘blind’ intuition.”

“You know it is.”

“Yet here you are, doubting me.”

“I never said that,” Ruby reached out to knock on the heavy wooden door. Not sure why they were even doing the courtesy of knocking. They could very well just barge in. But Emma didn’t want Belle to think they were against her, Emma knew she could reason with her if she approached this just right…

“You also didn’t run away when I told you.”

“She’s not going to tell us anything, Emma. We’re cops!”

“Belle’s logical. I feel like if we reason enough with her, she’ll be smart about giving us an answer.”

As the front door opened Emma caught sight of Belle for the first time in a long time. The pretty and quiet research analyst who she had worked with nearly every day looked exhausted. Bags under her eyes. No makeup on. Dark hair piled on top of her head in a pony tail. She was beautiful, but sad. The same way Killian had been when she met him. Emma felt bad about ambushing her this way, about such a sensitive thing. But it was her job and to her core Emma believed Belle would provide far more for them in finding Gold than sitting in a hidden squad car in the woods all night would.

“Belle…” Ruby started, all three women standing here were not that different in age. It was sad. The thought that the person Belle had once loved turned out to be such a monster.

“I already told the officers earlier I have no idea where he went.” She sounded tired. Exhausted, not necessarily physically (she had stayed mostly locked up in this house avoiding society since Gold’s arrest) but emotionally.

“We’re here to help, Belle.” Emma offered. Though as the quiet settled over the three women Emma heard the snap of a twig a few feet from her and perked up immediately. “What was that?”

“What?” Ruby and Belle both asked, not recognizing the sound Emma had definitely heard.

“Go inside I’ll be right back.” Emma said authoritatively, locking eyes with Ruby and telling her not to question her.

Once Emma heard the front door close, she slowly made her way down the porch steps and into the grass. Careful not to step on any stray branches. Like whomever was lurking around this house had just made the mistake of doing. She slowly moved around the bend, the surroundings too dark for her to tell exactly what was in front of her. Until her eyes adjusted and took advantage of the soft light coming from an upstairs window of Belle’s house. A figure was about 200 feet ahead of her in the dark. Hooded. Wearing all black, with a slight limp. Gold.

Un-fucking-believable. Emma took off after Gold, sprinting as fast as her legs allowed while he just ran faster and faster. The open field next to his old house providing a clear view of the back of the hood. Emma pushed harder trying to catch Gold, knowing she could. He didn’t have his cane and probably couldn’t sustain this pace for long. So she surged, taking in stride the extra few feet. She was within grasp of him now, her heart racing, pulse about to explode from within her chest. Emma’s breath ragged, she could grab his hood if she were just a foot closer. Whatever powerful source from within her took action and gave her the extra push she needed and Emma closed the gap. Tripping as she did to fall on top of Gold’s body and collapse into the field.

Emma heaved, pushing any breath out she could to calm the pounding in her chest as she secured herself on top of him, grabbing his arms to pin them to the ground beneath. But when the hooded figure turned their face toward Emma and her eyes focused on the person she had tackled to the ground she realized it wasn’t Gold she was on top of. No, it wasn’t a man at all. In fact, it was a woman. The face now so familiar to her, Emma could have sworn they met before.

“Milah.” Emma gasped. It wasn’t a question, there was no question about it. Emma knew who this woman was despite having never really encountered her before. Looking down at the wild haired, brown-eyed woman who had left Neal motherless and broken Killian’s heart all within one lifetime.

[man-creates-dinosaurs]

Next week marks the home video release of KONG: SKULL ISLAND (2017, Dir. Jordan Vogt-Roberts) and to celebrate I’m going to be posting an updated version of an article I originally wrote for Kevin Derendorf’s fantastic blog Maser Patrol back in March in anticipation of KONG: SKULL ISLAND’s then impending theatrical release. As recounted on the KONG: SKULL ISLAND episode of the Maser Patrol Podcast (on which I also appeared), Kevin originally asked me to write something for the blog on account that I was currently teaching a course on King Kong and Western History and Culture. Initially I was unsure of what I could contribute until the subject of Delos W. Lovelace’s 1932 novelization of the original KING KONG (1933, Dir. Merian C. Cooper and Ernest B. Schoedsack) was broached. Having long been fascinated with the novelization of King Kong for reasons which should quickly become apparent I set to work writing an admittedly lengthy essay outlining both the history of the novelization’s conception and publication as well as the major differences between it and the final theatrical film. This proved to be a rewarding experience since shortly after the publication of my article I was contacted by Ernest Farino of Archive Editions LLC; the publisher of Mike Hankin’s exhaustively researched 3-volume series Ray Harryhausen - Master of Majicks, the first volume of which had proven an important source when researching the history of Lovelace’s King Kong novelization. Ernest was kind enough to share with me some incredibly rare and hard to come by documents and information regarding the different prose versions of King Kong that have been printed over the years as a result I have updated this essay to reflect, what are for me, new discoveries. This updated version of my essay is also coming into existence in a post-KONG: SKULL ISLAND world. When I originally wrote this article I had no idea that an exhaustive essay on the 1932 novelization of the original KING KONG would be so relevant to this latest Kong film, but it was, and so again this essay has been updated to reflect that. With all this out of the way here is…. KING KONG (1932) THE DELOS W. LOVELACE NOVELIZATION (2nd Ed.) Though often considered ‘junk literature,’ movie novelizations – that is, novels based on film scripts – remain a popular and lucrative part of the modern American literary landscape. According to Randall D. Larson’s authoritative book Film Into Books: An Analytical Bibliography of Film Novelizations, Movie and TV Tie-Ins, novelizations are as old as the cinema itself. Historically studios commissioned novelizations as another way of drumming up advance publicity for a film, as well as to provide their movie with a more erudite air at a time when films were still seen as a gimmick by many and not deserving of the same cultural status as books. Also in the days before home video and television, novelizations served as a way for people to revisit a beloved film. Today novelizations remain popular because they often provide fans with a more complete version of a particular story then what can be found in the two-hour runtime of a film. Characters that only got a few words in edgewise can monologue for pages, and various bits of narrative minutia can be expanded upon at length. And because novelizations have to be written well in advance of the film itself being finished, novelizations will often contain deleted or alternate versions of certain scenes not found in the theatrical release.

With regards to Delos W. Lovelace’s 1932 novelization of the 1933 version of King Kong, all of the above is true and then some, because part of what makes Lovelace’s novelization of the original King Kong so interesting is not just the more fully fleshed out characters or the numerous scenes found within the book but not the film, but the fact that Lovelace’s novelization is one of the very few which has never gone out of print – at least not for long. Casualties of their very nature, most movie novelizations are printed once, sold briefly and then disappear entirely; only to pop-up later on the collector’s market where they go for exorbitant prices. Only a lucky few – such as the novelizations for the original Star Wars Trilogy or Alan Dean Foster’s novelization of Ridley Scott’s Alien (1979) – stay in print perpetually. Lovelace’s King Kong is one of these.

King Kong was originally published in 1932 by Grosset & Dunlap and genuine first editions are identifiable thanks to a typo on the dust jacket where the word “by” is repeated twice (see above image). After this the novel briefly fell out of print until 1965 when it was reprinted by Bantam Books, followed by Ace Books in 1976 with a cover by legendary fantasy painter Frank Frazetta. That same year King Kong was also reissued by Albin Michel, Tempo Books and its original publisher Grosset & Dunlap this time with the later two featuring accompanying interior illustrations by artist Richard Powers. The following year Grosset & Dunlap reissued the book again as did publishers Arthur Barker, Futura and Otava. King Kong then briefly falls out of publication again until 2005 when Grosset & Dunlap reissue the novelization. That same year King Kong is also inducted into the prestigious Modern Library series, with this being the version still on the commercial market today. This edition features a new preface by Cooper biographer Mark Cotta Vaz and an introductory essay by noted sci-fi author Greg Bear, whose 1998 novel Dinosaur Summer – a sequel to Arthur Conan Doyle’s The Lost World set in the early 1950s  – I would be remise to not mention here only because it features Merian C. Cooper, Ernest Schoedsack, Willis O’Brien and Ray Harryhausen as strong supporting characters.

Undoubtedly much of the King Kong novelization’s success is owed to its author, Delos W. Lovelace, whose clear, crisp prose and taut pacing make the book an exciting and fast read. However, over the years there has been some confusion as to who exactly Mr. Lovelace was, with some even assuming that he was actually a pseudonym for either best-selling mystery writer Edgar Wallace or director Merian C. Cooper whose names also routinely appear on the novelization’s cover. To clarify this issue, Cooper originally hired Edgar Wallace to write the initial story treatment for King Kong and had also planned to hire him on as the writer of the novelization. However this was not to be as Wallace succumbed to pneumonia complicated by undiagnosed diabetes and died shortly after Cooper hired him and before he could contribute – to quote Cooper himself – “one bloody word” to King Kong. However out of respect to Wallace, and out of a less respectful desire to exploit the late author’s brand name, Cooper gave Wallace story credit on both the film and novelization anyway and also authorized for an abridged version of the novelization to be run in the February and March 1933 installments of Mystery magazine; the publication where much of Wallace’s work had seen print. This Mystery magazine version was simply titled Kong and was published under Wallace’s name alone though it was actually written by Walter F. Ripperger. Cooper then hired his old friend, journalist turned short-story writer Delos W. Lovelace to pen the actual novelization. Cooper had roomed with Lovelace in college and both men worked together as journalists for The Minneapolis Daily News in 1916. As a result Lovelace became the natural candidate to transform Cooper’s movie into a book. Lovelace was paid a total of $600 for his work on the novelization – a significant sum of money in the 1930s – with a contract signed for royalties up to $1,500, after which amount all profits would be split equally between Lovelace and the other “authors”; i.e. Cooper. According to researcher Ray Morton, Lovelace based his novelization off of screenwriter Ruth Rose’s first draft of the King Kong screenplay, which was itself a revised version of the screenplay penned by screenwriter James Creelman who had rewritten Wallace’s initial story treatment. As a result Lovelace’s novelization contains several scenes, a good bit of dialogue and a few more superficial details not found in the final theatrical version of King Kong released in 1933.           

Since it is these alternative bits of info which are most likely of interest to readers of this article who have themselves not read Lovelace’s novelization, the remainder of this essay will list the major differences found between the 1932 novelization and the 1933 film version – which I am assuming all readers are thoroughly familiar with. As a final note, there are conflicting reports as to what the legal status of Lovelace’s novelization actually is. Some sources claim that the novel is now in public domain while others dispute this while still other sources say that it is the Mystery magazine version which is public domain while yet others claim it is both. Whatever the case may be one thing is clear and that is that Lovelace’s novelization has proven a source for every major remake, reboot and adaptation of King Kong to come along since the original 1933 film was released. This includes Dino De Laurentiis and John Guillermin’s 1976 King Kong remake, as well as Peter Jackson’s 2005 version and the most recent iteration; Jordan Vogt-Robert’s Kong: Skull Island which is part of Legendary Picture’s MonsterVerse. In addition, both Gold Key and Monster Comics – an imprint of Fantagraphics Books – have produced comic book versions of King Kong based on Lovelace’s novelization in 1968 and 1991 respectively. There have also been animated versions of King Kong as well including 1998’s The Mighty Kong and an episode of the 1990 animated series Alvin and the Chipmunks Go to the Movies, among others, which have clearly used Lovelace’s novelization as a source of inspiration. As a result I have made notes in the following of when and where elements of the King Kong novelization turn up in other Kong media…      

·         A Ship by Any Other Name: In Lovelace’s novelization the ship Denham and co. take to Kong’s island is the Wanderer, not the Venture as in the movie. In Kong: Skull Island, a ship called the Wanderer is found in the native village where it has been converted into a shrine for Kong. Director Jordan Vogt-Roberts has said that this was done so as to suggest that some variation of the storyline from the original 1933 film was cannon with Legendary Picture’s MonsterVerse.  

·         Denham, Who?: Actor Robert Armstrong played movie mogul Carl Denham in the 1933 film, but in Lovelace’s 1932 novelization the character is just called Denham with no first name. This is one of the surest signs that you’re dealing with a Kong adaptation that is using the novel as its basis and includes both the 1968 and 1991 King Kong comic adaptations and 1998’s The Mighty Kong.

·         The Wanderer’s Crew: Other than Englehorn and Jack we don’t get to know much of the ship’s crew in the 1933 King Kong film. But in Lovelace’s novelization we are introduced to two additional characters; Jimmy and Lumpy. Lumpy is a veteran sailor who spends his time hanging out with a pet monkey named Ignatz. Lumpy never ventures into the interior of Kong’s island and so survives his time there. Jimmy, on the other hand, is a cabin boy who volunteers to go with the first wave of men after Ann and who carries the backpack full of gas bombs smuggled onto the island by Denham. Jimmy later dies in the Spider-Pit. Both of these characters are featured in Peter Jackson’s 2005 remake of King Kong with Jimmy being portrayed by actor Jamie Bell and Lumpy by actor Andy Serkis who pulled double duty as the motion-capture actor for Kong. In Jackson’s version Lumpy dies in the Spider-Pit while Jimmy survives but is badly injured by Kong. Jimmy also pops up in 1998’s The Mighty Kong now with a pet monkey named Chip.

·         Ann and Jack’s Backstory: Like the rest of the characters we learn only the scantest details about our principal protagonists Ann Darrow and Jack Driscoll in the 1933 film. Lovelace’s novelization fleshes these two out telling us that Ann was raised on a farm and loss her parent’s at a young age. The money left to her was entrusted to an uncle until she came of age, but her uncle squandered the money leaving Ann destitute and in New York searching for work. Likewise we learn that Jack ran away from home to avoid going to college, became a sailor and later reconciled with his mother – though she disapproves of his association with a known risk-taker like Denham.    

·         Love in the Crow’s Nest: In the 1933 film Jack confesses his love to Ann on the desk of the ship, but in Lovelace’s novelization he does it up in the ship’s crow’s nest – which is a far more atmospheric and romantic image.

·         Skull Mountain Island: Though it may come as a surprise to many, Kong’s home is never actually called “Skull Island” in the original 1933 film. Nor is it called this, per se, in Lovelace’s novelization where it is instead referred to as “Skull Mountain Island.” The name Skull Island appears to go back to Kingsley Long’s serialized version of the King Kong story (to be discussed in more detail below) but it is not until 1976 that the name Skull Island appears in association with any official King Kong merchandise, in this case the John Barry soundtrack for the Dino De Laurentiis and John Guillermin remake; though again the island itself is never called this in the actual film. Since then Kong’s home has been unambiguously referred to as Skull Island in all other movies. 

·         Racism: As a franchise King Kong has a poor track record when it comes to depictions of both people of color and indigenous cultures. Lovelace’s novelization is no exception here, though it does fair better in some ways and worse in others. For one Charlie the racially insensitive comic relief Chinese cook from the 1933 film – and its sequel Son of Kong – is nowhere to be found. The Skull Mountain Island natives however are still the same lamentable stereotypes with Lovelace contributing a few cringe worthy lines regarding both the white explorers “racial superiority” and how “primitive minds” find the act of thinking especially difficult. Lovelace also chooses to repeatedly emphasize the whiteness of Ann’s skin to a point that it becomes apparent he is attempting to make a link between white skin, virginal innocence and moral purity – ideas which have a long history of problematic racial and sexual connotations.

·         The Protagonists Figure out What Kong is Before Ever Seeing Him: After their initial encounter with the natives of Skull Mountain Island, Denham, Jack and Ann return to Englehorn’s cabin and try to make sense out of the mysterious ritual they’ve just seen. Knowing that the native girl they saw was intended as the bride of Kong the four attempt to figure out just what Kong is leading to the following exchange…

“But even agreeing to all this,” Englehorn puzzled, “I haven’t yet any clear idea of what Kong is.”

“I have,” Denham said with abrupt conviction. “That wall wasn’t built against any pintsized danger. There were a dozen proxy bridegrooms because only with so many could the natives approximate the size of the creature which was getting the sacrifices. And those gorilla skins that the dancers wore didn’t mean that Kong is a gorilla by a long shot. If he’s really there, he’s a brute big enough to use a gorilla for a medicine ball.”

“But there never was such a beast!” Ann laughed uncertainly. “At least not since prehistoric times.” Denham shifted in his seat to stare.

“Holy Mackerel!” he whispered. “I wonder if you’ve hit it, Ann?

”“Rot!” Discroll exploded. Englehorn shook an unbelieving head…

“Why shouldn’t such an out-of-the-way spot be just the place to find a solitary, surviving prehistoric freak?” [Denham’s] eyes flashed. “Holy Mackerel! If we find the brute, what a picture!”

·         Triceratops in the Asphalt Pit: Marian C. Cooper met Willis O’Brien while the later was at work on never-to-be-completed ‘Lost World’ picture Creation. At the time the only sequence from Creation which O’Brien had committed to film was a brief scene in which a hunter shoots and kills a baby triceratops, enraging its parents who proceed to chase the vandal down and gore him to death. Cooper had originally intended to make use of this footage and O’Brien’s triceratops models in a sequence following the crew of the Wanderer’s narrow escape from the lagoon dwelling brontosaurus. In Lovelace’s novelization the men catch up with Kong who is embroiled in a fight with a trio of triceratopses in an asphalt pit with Kong lobbing boulders at his dinosaur adversaries. Kong escapes the enraged dinosaurs that then turn their attention to the men and give chase, killing one, while the rest are forced onto a log leading across a ravine where they encounter Kong on the other side. It’s not clear at what point this sequence was cut from the 1933 film but it seems to have been fairly late and after having gone through several variations including one where the triceratops would be replaced by a prehistoric rhino – arsinoitherium – and another in which they were replaced by a different horned dinosaur; styracosaurus. Early publicity photos of the iconic log sequence exist showing the styracosaurus on the one side of the ravine and Kong on the other. Some, like Peter Jackson, believe a version of this scene, like the infamous ‘lost’ Spider-Pit sequence, may have even been shot and then deleted. Variations on this sequence show up in both the 1968 and 1991 King Kong comic adaptations. In the 1968 comic Kong battles a pair of triceratops while a styracosaurus chases the men across the log. The 1991 comic has Kong facing off against a whole heard of different ceratopsian dinosaurs and a random ankylosaurus(!) In 1998’s The Mighty Kong the stegosaurus the sailors initially encounter in the 1933 film is replaced with a lone ceratopian, anticipating Peter Jackson by seven years. A triceratops skull is also featured prominently in the mass grave seen in Kong: Skull Island, which director Jordan Vogt-Roberts says was done to indicate that while dinosaurs did once exist on Skull Island that by the 1970s they are all long dead.   

·         The Spider-Pit Sequence: Undoubtedly the most celebrated deleted-scene of all time is the infamous Spider-Pit sequence. Conceived early on in the 1933 film’s development this sequence would have taken place immediately after Kong knocks the remaining sailor off the log into the ravine. The sailors – most of whom are still alive – would have awakened to find themselves besieged by various giant arachnids, insects, lizards and other assorted monstrosities who lurk at the bottom of the ravine. Behind-the-scenes photos from the 1933 film show that the set and models for the scene were constructed but to this day debate rages over whether or not they were ever actually employed with many fans holding out hope that they were and that the deleted scene has survived the ravages of time locked away somewhere in an unmarked film canister waiting to be rediscovered. This sequence however definitely shows up in Lovelace’s novelization and is just as chilling as anyone might hope. It also shows up in 1991 King Kong comic adaptation and, of course, in Peter Jackson’s 2005 film. Jackson also commissioned a period-accurate reconstruction of the original Spider-Pit sequence which is included as a special feature on all current Blu-ray and most DVD releases of the original King Kong. Spiders are, of course, not the only denizens of the Spider-Pit and one of these beasts did make it into the 1933 film. This is a strange two-legged lizard which climbs up the side of the ravine in an attempt to get Jack. Identified as a fictitious “polysauro” in the Draycott Montagu Dell version of the King Kong story (to be discussed in more detail below) this creature also served as the principal inspiration for the Skull Crawler kaijū in Kong: Skull Island.    

·         Kong vs. a Giant Snake (Maybe?): Following his fight with the tyrannosaurus, Kong reaches his mountain lair where he encounters another foe lying in wait. Based on Lovelace’s description it’s not entirely clear what this creature is supposed to be though it is described as “serpentine” leading many subsequent artists and filmmakers to conclude that it is a giant snake. This includes most notably Dino De Laurentiis and John Guillermin in their 1976 King Kong remake as well as the artists for the 1968 and 1991 comic book adaptations, 1998’s The Mighty Kong and even the “Kong!” episode of the 1990 animated series Alvin and the Chipmunks Go to the Movies. In the 1933 film version of this sequence the creature Kong battles is actually an elasmosaurus; albeit an admittedly snake-like one.    

·         Escape from Kong’s Lair: In the 1933 film Ann and Jack escape from Kong’s lair by attempting to shimmy down a vine dangling over a cliff. When this doesn’t work the two jump into a pool of water below. In Lovelace’s novelization, however, Ann and Jack escape by diving down into the pool inside Kong’s cave – the same pool the giant snake had been hiding in – and swimming through an underwater tunnel and that spits them out over the adjacent waterfall. The two then swim down river until reaching the lagoon where the crew of the Wanderer previously encountered the angry brontosaurus and then running the rest of the way back to the native village.

·         Kong Caged: Lovelace describes Kong as being shackled to the floor inside a large cage when he is presented to the public as part of Denham’s show, as oppose to the now iconic crucifixion pose from the 1933 film. Both the 1968 comic adaptation and Dino De Laurentiis and John Guillermin’s 1976 King Kong remake share the cage imagery.    

·         Kong in New York: In Lovelace’s novelization Kong pursues Ann and Jack into the lobby of the hotel where Jack is staying which is across the street from the theater – Ann had the good sense to get a room nine blocks away – where a security guard opens fire on the beast-god with little effect. In the 1933 film Kong climbs the building searching for Ann and in one of the more horrific scenes finds another woman sleeping in bed. Thinking it may be Ann, Kong reaches inside of picks her up. When he realizes it is not he simply drops her to her death. In Lovelace’s novelization this moment still plays out but is surprisingly more terrifying since it occurs from Ann and Jack’s perspective who can only hear what is happening to the women in the room next door to them. Once Kong has Ann he escapes by climbing over various NYC rooftops until he reaches the Empire State Building. Unlike the 1933 film there is no sequence in which Kong destroys an elevated train.    

·         “It Was Beauty. As always, Beauty killed the Beast:” Denham still delivers a slightly wordier version of his famous last line in Lovelace’s novelization from atop the Empire State Building rather than on the ground next to Kong’s body as in the film.  

Lovelace’s novelization is not the only prose version of the original 1933 King Kong film to appear in print, though it is definitely the most accessible today. The aforementioned Mystery magazine version of the story has been reprinted in Mike Hankin’s Ray Harryhausen - Master of the Majicks Vol. 1: Beginnings and Endings. Forest J. Ackerman, founder of Famous Monsters of Filmland magazine also later rewrote the Mystery magazine version when he serialized it in Issues #25-27 (Oct. 1963-March ’64) of his now legendary fanzine. Ackerman evidently felt that “many of the ‘good’ parts were left out” in this adaptation (he’s right, there’s no T. Rex fight for one) and so Ackerman took the liberty of adding them back in.

Hankin also reports that beginning in April of 1933 the London Dailey Herald ran a serialized version of King Kong over the course of 37 installments penned by journalist turned crime-fiction novelist Kingsley Long. Long’s version of the story – which is virtually impossible to come by today with one of the few extant copies kept under lock-and-key at The Special Collections Library at Brigham Young University – is told in a pseudo-documentary style; reporting on the events of King Kong as if they had actually happened. Hankin writes that Long’s adaptation not only fleshes out the principal characters more but also contains such intriguing additional information including the idea that “the origins of Kong and the Skull Island civilization” lie in Atlantis – an idea that crops up in Weta Workshop���s faux-field guide The World of Kong: A Natural History of Skull Island and finds its fullest expression in the 2005 direct-to-DVD animated movie Kong: King of Atlantis – and reveals what happened to Kong’s body after his fall from the Empire State Building: Denham had it stuffed and mounted and charged folks to see it!

Yet another short-story version of the film appeared in the October 1933 issue of Cinema Weekly magazine where it was also credited to Edgar Wallace but actually written by Draycott Montague Dell. This adaptation was later reprinted in the 1988 book Movie Monsters published by Severn House and is now out-of-print, though it appears to be common throughout public libraries and used copies are not hard to track down. That same month this same version of the story also appeared in the juvenile publication Boys Magazine (Vol 23. No. 608, Oct. 1933).

There has also been at least one children’s book adaptation of the original King Kong. First published in 1983 and then again in 1988 by Random House this version was based on the Lovelace novelization but rewritten for children by Judith Conaway with accompanying illustrations by Michael Berenstain. Conaway was not the last to rewrite Lovelace’s prose however. In 2005 writers Joe DeVito and Brad Strickland also rewrote Lovelace’s 1932 novelization and published it under the title Merian C. Cooper’s King Kong: A Novel. The point of this was apparently to improve upon Lovelace’s original as well as to bring the novelization into the same narrative continuity as DeVito and Strickland’s own original prequel Kong novel Kong: King of Skull Island.           

[aarondinglestears]

agree about the affair era being the best.(and i hate to admit it, but their chemistry plummeted post-affair.) i feel like the show tried to mold their characters to fit some true love domesticated romance template and gloss over their issues with all that "no comes close" stuff rather than build a relationship around their characters. we don't see rob's cockiness/charm around aaron as much, and aaron lost a lot of his edge. i know characters evolve, but still. one thing i liked about (1)

this sl was i thought they'd split and we'd see them start again with the whole "can't stay away" dynamic. if the show is going to keep them together no matter what, then i wish they wouldn't romanticize it as much. it'd be sad, but more interesting, imo, if aaron was portrayed as staying out of not only love, but fear and self-doubt and had to admit and really struggle with the fact he's not an exception and will never fully be able to trust rob. they're more believable w/tension not fluff. 2

YESSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! “true love domesticated romance template” oh my god nonnie you're a genius. Yes. One of my most notorious unpopular opinions is my skepticism about robron being soulmates. I prefer to see them as tortured lovers who can’t bear to be without each other (kind of like an addiction?) The thing that made the affair work so well was all the sexual tension fueled by anger and machismo. And you’re right, it would have been much easier to make that leap from lovers to soulmates if they’d have fleshed out what made them want to be a couple besides sex!!! The most ‘romantic’ moments since they officially got together have been expressed with platitudes, tropes, and cliches*, so I find it difficult to identify WHY they feel so ~destined~.

I also hoped for a split, so we could revisit the working-their-way-back-to-each-other mode we got at the beginning of 2016. Have you ever noticed that was the healthiest time in their relationship, and also the only time they weren’t banging? (I’m an angst fiend and that I could do without fluff so even though I concede sometimes it’s nice to see them all snuggly, it doesn’t really take them anywhere. It doesn’t give them an arc.)

Aaron IS an exception in some ways: Robert didn’t cheat on him because he was bored and tempted by someone else (like he usually does); he cheated because he wanted to hurt him and he thought! about! Aaron!!! the! whole! time! he was fucking someone! else!!!!! That’s what makes Aaron the exception (LOL 😞) That is an important distinction, as sad as it is. It means Robert cares a lot more about Aaron than he does anyone he’s been with before (possibly excluding Katie). 

From Aaron’s pov, as I said before he’s generally not attuned to the things that make someone toxic for him, and it wouldn’t occur to him to choose being alone over anyone he’s with. But I do think loving Robert and feeling loved by Robert makes his life better overall. So I’m not sure what to expect from their bust-up. Because on the one hand I can see Aaron not realizing the ways in which he is truly special to Robert, and otoh I can imagine Aaron knowing deep in his soul, finally understanding, that he IS that important to him. Either way as long as it’s portrayed with the gravity it deserves, I’m okay with that.

But yeah at the end of the day, “staying out of not only love, but fear and self-doubt and had to admit and really struggle with the fact he's not an exception and will never fully be able to trust rob.” TOTALLY AGREE. That would make this SL more weighty, impactful, interesting, rewarding, etc. I would so prefer it. But sadly it seems the show (driven by fan response) is not inclined to frame their relationship as /that/ flawed because it would expose their incompatibility too much. It would show how much work they still need to do to achieve a healthy relationship (work the show has never wanted to do based on their choosing to ignore the lodge, sigh.)

[themusicenthusiast]

Album Review: ‘The Peace and The Panic’ by Neck Deep

The ebb and flow of various styles of music is a fascinating and curious thing. Pop punk for example, a genre that was brought into the mainstream and made commercially successful over twenty years ago, ultimately peaking with an abundance of such bands in the early 2000s, ushering in a resurgence of sorts. The genre is largely still championed by bands from those era, be it Green Day or blink-182 or New Found Glory or Good Charlotte. There’s a host of others out there too, still kicking all of these years later and arguably better than ever before. But for the most part, there has been few new and noteworthy happenings in that world as indie, rock, pop and such genres came back into favor. Of course, there are a few exceptions to that, and Neck Deep is certainly one of them. From starting off as a project that was mainly just for kicks to evolving into a fully fleshed out band ready for live shows, they have subsequently taken the world by storm (or at least a good portion of it). The UK-based outfit has won over crowds all over the globe during their relentless touring, supporting highly respected names and doing their own headline runs. And the successes should only keep piling up, the quintet’s latest effort, the recently released The Peace and The Panic (out via Hopeless Records) standing poised to be one of the most solid releases in pop punk. Period. The near dozen songs have been thoughtfully curated, evoking a pure and classic pop punk sound but one infused with modern touches as a way to fit with the here and now. In addition to that, this collection of songs represent a new era for Neck Deep, the music sounding more mature in regards to the stories told, demonstrating just how much they have grown over the last few years, pushing themselves to new heights.

That’s seen right off the bat with the lead song “Motion Sickness”, which begins a sort of theme that is revisited a few times throughout the record: one that focuses on the passing of Ben Barlow’s father and how that loss has affected the frontman. Musically it’s as upbeat and chipper as possible, packing an explosive punch that demands the listener succumb and let it take hold. One can easily imagine being at a show and the friendly moshing that is likely to ensue, the charged guitars and pronounced, rapid-fire percussion, together mounting an all-out assault that is irresistible. The story it delves into is extremely sentimental, though, Barlow detailing working to come to grips with that loss and some of the greater meanings of life as he searches for some sort of solace. Lines such as “…But then I find myself in bed, lost inside my head again. Running over everything…” recount the times spent trying to reckon everything. Optimism is teeming from the catchy music bed, though the only place it’s reflected in terms of the story is the chorus, which offers a much-needed jolt of joy to the track, as it focuses on words of encouragement to never stop pursuing your dreams, because you never know how close you might be to attaining them. While far from qualifying as depressing (reflective would be a better way to describe that first song), the album doesn’t get hung-up on such heavy subject matter. Nevertheless, “Happy Judgement Day” is not one to take lightly, the lead single released in advance of the album standing as a definite highlight from it. Political to an extent, it doesn’t get too specific in regards to what is wrong with the world and who is responsible for it. Then again, perhaps everyone is culpable to a degree, at least through the eyes of this track; the number capturing a sense of disbelief in how close humanity may actually be to the end with all of the unrest and turmoil currently happening in the world. More than that, it also focuses on what people could do to fight it, not so subtly hinting at how obsessed people have become with social media and celebrities among other issues, as the group stresses people wake up to what’s truly going on around them. “Happy Judgement Day” epitomizes pop punk, capturing that rebellious spirit as it urges a change; the riffs being sharp and action-packed, the song as a whole extremely dynamic. While that single fails to be assertive in regards to action against the system, “Don’t Wait” does not. It stands as a legitimate political anthem while also acting as the heaviest cut from TPATP. There’s more of a hardcore branding to it, and not just due to the fact that they enlisted the help of Sam Carter from Architects on the bridge and final chorus. Dani Washington’s drumming even feels more robust, a little extra kick drum added to the mix, Fil Thorpe-Evans rounding that out with some heavy bass lines that saturate the song with a thickness typically not heard on Neck Deep’s material. It may not be for them all the time, though they make it sound incredible. It’s in their wheelhouse and it’s refreshing in a way. Stopping short of advocating for anarchy, “Don’t Wait” does highlight the importance of questioning one’s government and any and all news people consume, illustrating how those in control use divisive techniques to keep citizens from realizing who the real enemy is. It’s all too relevant to the current state of the world; Neck Deep deserving some serious kudos for using their platform to address something so serious. Loss continues to permeate the album, the band also pushing themselves sonically with “Wish You Were Here”, which acts as the lull on The Peace and The Panic. The entirely acoustic song coupled with the sincerity of the lyrics ensures it winds up being the most heartfelt offering on the album, one brimming with sorrow. A sorrow that borders on being forlorn as it focuses on losing anyone – a dear friend or even a family member – and reminiscing of all the great times had and all the memories that should still be being made, taking little comfort in words designed to make one feel better. It is a song about what was and what could have been, if only things had been different and life had stretched out further for a certain person. “Wish You Were Here” may be the most chill song on the album, though it could be argued it is also the best track from it. It’s genuine in a way few songs are, the somber tones and raw emotions piercing through, striking a nerve with the listener. It’s difficult to not feel a connection with it, many people surely being able to relate in their own way as Barlow sings about regret for all the memories that were never made, time running out much sooner than expected. The most remarkable thing about The Peace and The Panic is the way it all comes full circle. There are songs about relationships and, of course, some more politically and socially geared tracks peppered throughout, but as it nears the conclusion it revisits the passing of Barlow’s father, further demonstrating how that loss has shaped him as a person and a musician. “19 Seventy Sumthin’” is the albums biggest surprise hit, relying heavily on a bit of nostalgia as it captures a cheery vibe and tells a tale of a picturesque relationship. There’s something enchanted about it, the way it all unfolds being able to take primary credit for that feeling of magic; the story being that of how Barlow’s parents met, started their life together and began a family. While not infectious in a traditional way, it still manages that, right up until the shift, the abrupt jump from a gently plucked guitar to the full band ultimately jumping in. It represents the sudden crushing dose of reality that struck in the form of a heart attack, the rest of the song being about coping and leaning on one another as a family to handle what life threw at you. Beautifully penned, the music is integral to the way it conveys itself, all of it being intricately pieced together to create an exceptional song. Completing the journey is “Where Do We Go When We Go?”, which echoes back to a line from “Motion Sickness”, “…Sat on the kitchen floor all alone talking to a ghost about where we go when we go…” It operates from the perspective that no one knows for sure what comes after this life – nothing at all or a place of eternal riches. It doesn’t concern itself with trying to answer that either, more just trying to establish both perspectives are reasonable. Instead, it captures the, “rage, rage against the dying of the light,” mentality, accepting the fact that we are all here for a short time; and while life may be trying and full of suffering, it’s worth it to persevere. Persevere because you never know what lies ahead; the track boasting what may well be the most punk line of the entire record, “…I just wanna get one up on life before it kills me.” Packing a hefty dose of punk venom, “Where Do We Go When We Go?” also winds up being a fairly aggressive song, getting in-your-face and providing a solid end to a stellar album. The Peace and The Panic represents a watershed moment for Neck Deep and stands as their most significant piece of work to date. It sonically captures that youthful vim and vigor that defines pop punk, sounding brash and exhilarating, though the stories it tells are born from the most trying events in life. Absent of angst (somewhat), each offering instead comes from the eyes of an adult, one that has experienced the hardships of life and has been changed because of it. On the surface, a lot of these songs sound fun – and they are meant to be to an extent – but if you dig down just a bit you realize how weighty they all are. They illustrate how far Barlow, Thorpe-Evans, Washington, Matt West, and Sam Bowden have come not just as musicians but as people, not losing their edge or any of the attributes that make them, them, but learning to view events through a different lens and artfully turn them into songs for the world to enjoy. Songs that will appease the angsty teenager just as much as they will the twenty and thirty-somethings whose youth was shaped by this specific genre. At the very least The Peace and The Panic proves that Neck Deep is worthy of being a torchbearer of pop punk. A band who fills the shoes of their forefathers quite well and one that in time may well be instrumental in sparking another renaissance of pop punk music. Purchase The Peace and The Panic on: iTunes | Google Play | Amazon MP3 Visit Neck Deep’s websites: Official Website | Facebook | Twitter Current Shows: 2017 October 4--MANDELA HALL--Belfast, United Kingdom 5--Tivoli Theatre--Dublin, Ireland 7--O2 Academy--Newcastle Upon Tyne, United Kingdom 8--O2 Academy--Glasgow, United Kingdom 9--ROCK CITY--Nottingham, United Kingdom 11--Norwich Nick Rayns LCR UEA--Norwich, United Kingdom 12--Cardiff University Students Union--Cardiff, United Kingdom 13--O2 Academy Brixton--London, United Kingdom 14--O2 Apollo--Manchester, United Kingdom 16--AB Box Brussels, Belgium 17--Melkweg Max--Amsterdam, Netherlands 18--Petit Bain--Paris, France 19—Essigfabrik--Cologne, Germany 20—Knust--Hamburg, Germany 21—Pumpehuset--Copenhagen, Denmark 23—binuu--Berlin, Germany 24--Conne Island--Leipzig, Germany 25—Universum--Stuttgart, Germany 26--Backstage Halle--Munich, Germany 27—WUK--Vienna, Austria 29--Circolo Magnolia--Segrate Mi, Italy 30—Kindergarten--Bologna, Italy November 1--Razzmatazz 2--Barcelona, Spain 2--Sala Chango--Madrid, Spain 3--CONNEXION LIVE--Toulouse, France 2018 January 18--The Observatory--Santa Ana, CA 20--Marquee Theatre--Tempe, AZ 22--The Bomb Factory--Dallas, TX 23--Alamo City Music Hall--San Antonio, TX 24--Warehouse Live (Ballroom)--Houston, TX 26--Center Stage Theater--Atlanta, GA 27--The Orpheum--Tampa, FL 28--Plaza Live--Orlando, FL 30--The Norva--Norfolk, VA 31--Rams Head Live--Baltimore, MD February 1--Electric Factory--Philadelphia, PA 2--PlayStation Theater--New York, NY 3—Palladium--Worcester, MA 5—Anthology--Rochester, NY 6--Club Soda--Montréal, Canada 8--Phoenix Concert Theatre--Toronto, Canada 9--Majestic Theatre--Detroit, MI 10--The Agora Theatre--Cleveland, OH 12--Concord Music Hall--Chicago, IL 13--First Avenue--Minneapolis, MN 14--The Truman--Kansas City, MO 16--Ogden Theatre--Denver, CO 17--The Complex--Salt Lake City, UT 18--Knitting Factory Concert House--Boise, ID 20--MacEwan Hall--Calgary, Canada 21--Union Hall--Edmonton, Canada 23--Vogue Theatre--Vancouver, Canada 24--Showbox at the Market--Seattle, WA 25--Roseland Theater--Portland, OR 27--The Regency Ballroom--San Francisco, CA 28--The Fonda Theatre--Hollywood, CA

[month9books]

Riverdale Recap and Review - Season 1 - Chapter 7 - In a Lonely Place by Andrew Buckley

That 50’s style comic book opening scene with Jughead wearing his crown and Archie in the sweater with the bowtie was beautifully shot, iconically accurate, and all sorts of creepy. This is something that Riverdale does well, I’ve seen it since episode one and they’ve managed to maintain it almost every single week so far: they commit to the weekly theme and they hit it hard right on the offset. Sure, they’ve only got 42(ish) minutes to work with so there’s no time to beat around the bush, but major props have to go to the producers, writers, and showrunners for consistently hitting the right notes in what’s become an almost perfect symphony of characters and story arcs. This week’s themes of ‘home’ and ‘hope’ are driven like a knife through Archie’s back during that opening sequence that narratively asks the question as to what a home truly is. We’ve seen so many different homes in Riverdale already, it’s easy to see why that particular theme probably gets revisited more than most but it was especially poignant this week with Jughead’s story. So let’s get to it . . .

I feel Archie redeemed himself a little this week after last week’s severe dip in his collective IQ. While he doesn’t shine through as being incredibly intuitive (he managed to ignore the fact that Jughead was homeless for how long?) he grabs some major points for having a heart of gold. He feels bad that he wasn’t there for Betty during her time of need and he fights to help Jughead by arranging for Mr. Jones to go back to work even though he doesn’t even have the full back story yet, he just wants to help his hurting friend. His dedication as a friend despite differences or awkwardness actually gave him a few moments to shine. Yes, he’s completely overshadowed by everyone else on the show but I still feel he gained a little ground this week.

After Polly’s magical escape from the mental institution, she sneaks (like a ninja) into her parent’s attic only to be found by Betty. All the characters in Riverdale have such strong personalities and stories, I’m having a little trouble getting behind Polly though. While she’s obviously not the ‘party girl’ that the Blossoms paint her to be, there’s something not quite right about that girl, and her continuing to cling to wanting to go live on a farm somewhere just doesn’t seem grounded in reality.

Either way, Betty helps her, first by appealing to the Blossoms via Cheryl, and then by Veronica’s intervention to move her into the Lodge residence. The Blossoms once again reiterated that they’re the big, evil, rich family of Riverdale by pulling a Rumpelstiltskin. They want Jason’s baby but they couldn’t care less about Polly, and I can’t completely blame them for that because we really haven’t been given enough reason to sympathize with Polly just yet. The Blossoms want the baby, but Cheryl, in an off-character moment of morality, wants what’s best for Jason’s unborn child and turns on her own family to place Polly in a safe place. This is sure to cause even more conflict in the Blossom household but it looks like Cheryl is beginning to hold her own against her deranged mother, which is nice to see.

We should get this out of the way before I get into this next story point. I love Veronica. Not the character as such, but more Camila Mendes’ portrayal is just so spot on that it’s scary. Which is why this one is tough to write about because her grandiose sweeping gestures and on-point wordplay has been stunning so far. But this week our dear Ronnie headed into some cliche-ridden waters and it was a shame because the character deserves better. Veronica holds a grudge against her mother for forging her signature, not because it was wrong, funnily enough, but because it would paint her in a negative light with her father (daddy issues much?). She proceeds to head out for a night on the town (Riverdale has a nightclub? And a busy one? On a school night?) with Kevin, Reggie, and Josie in order to defy her mother into negotiating with her. It feels like a classic rich girl move and that is too much of a departure from what we’ve come to know about Veronica. While it represents her past life, it’s a life she’s determined to leave behind but goes ahead with it anyway. In the end, all it boils down to is a quick convo with her mother, and all is well again in the Lodge household. Although it will be interesting to see how Mr. Lodge reacts to Hermione’s deception. 

Hats (and paper crowns) off to Skeet Ulrich for almost completely dominating the performance side of this episode of Riverdale. I say ‘almost’ because Jughead is the one that steals the show and delivers the feels. Jughead has pulled a Harry Potter and now lives under the stairs at school. We learn the reason why is because his Dad is somewhat of a deadbeat and his Mom and sister have left town. Father/son stuff always rips my heart a new one so I fully felt the story this week. Jughead wants his Dad to get his act together and he’s holding onto hope that it can actually happen and that it will eventually lead to a happy home, in one form or another. After Archie and Jughead get FP his job back, it all seems to be going well, until they head out for dinner and old demons join them at the table at Pops. We learn the backstory of Fred and FP’s friendship, their doomed partnership, and the clear signs that they hold each other responsible. I think Fred comes out on top here as FP obviously has some issues when it comes to making the right decisions above his own self interests, but they’re both a little at fault and I was shocked that Archie actually cut through the crap and addressed the issue with his Dad. Sure, FP was bad for business but did Fred ever consider what it would mean for Jughead’s family? In true Fred Andrews fashion, he quickly redeems himself by inventing an alibi for Jughead to help prove he’s not the murderer.

Jughead getting taken downtown and questioned was a bit of a leap for Sheriff Keller but I think he’s really grasping at straws at this point. The killer is in town, we’ve already met him, but no one knows who it is. There were a lot of great scenes between Jughead and his Dad but their relationship, and the weekly themes, are driven home by the confrontation behind the police station. We can truly believe that FP wants to clean up his act and wants Jughead to be proud of him, but he lacks the motivation and willpower to do it and prefers to continually blame others for his actions. Jughead on the other hand clings on to hope that his Dad can turn his life around and rebuild their home as a family, but it was clear in that scene that Jughead doesn’t truly believe it to be possible and, furthermore, his Dad knows it too. Which is why Jughead moves into the Andrews household and FP willingly lets him go.

This week’s cliffhanger piece is the sight of Jason’s jacket hanging in Mr. Jones’ closet. We last saw that jacket in the hidden car last week so it could be that Mr. Jones torched the car, Jason had multiple jackets, or someone else fired up the vehicle and then planted the jackets in Mr. Jones’ trailer . Mr. Jones is too obvious to be the killer so we can scratch him off the list. (As my Polly/Betty multiple personality theory got shot all to hell, I have a new one . . .  which I’ll share before next week’s episode. Stay tuned!)

What is a happy home in Riverdale? It almost doesn’t exist because every household is so rife with drama and problems that it seems impossible. But this episode was all about hope for a happy home and we can only assume that our dear characters will find exactly that, in one form or another. Even if it’s just an air mattress on a friend’s floor. Just hopefully not anytime too soon because the drama on this show is just so much wicked freakin fun! 

STRAY THOUGHTS OF AWESOMENESS . . .

- Polly jumped out of a window and, despite there being blood on the glass, she survives completely unscathed. I think it’s safe to say that Polly is a mutant/immortal/vampire or something to that effect.

- The Cooper’s attic is the place scary things go to die. What’s with those freakin dolls?!

- The Betty/Jughead (Bughead as the kids are calling it online) is still pushed to the back of the bus again this week. Juggie putting his arm around Betty causing Archie and Ronnie to address the gesture brought some of it to the surface but it’s still not sitting at the forefront of the story. Understandable though as there’s a ton of other stuff going on.

- The Team Blossom hunting crew has actual hunting dogs. Dogs are well known to be very useful when tracking pregnant teenagers.

- I’m seriously looking forward to when we get to see Mr. Lodge in the flesh. It has to happen. We all know it!

- Mr. Blossom’s wig disturbs me more and more every single week.

- Alice Cooper continues to be evil. Not Penelope Blossom evil. But evil. Press conference outside the church? What? Why? Worst mother of the year award goes to . . . 

Andrew Buckley attended the Vancouver Film School’s Writing for Film and Television program. After pitching and developing several screenplay projects for film and television, he worked in marketing and public relations, before becoming a professional copy and content writer. During this time Andrew began writing his first adult novel, DEATH, THE DEVIL AND THE GOLDFISH, followed closely by his second novel, STILTSKIN both published by Curiosity Quills Press. Andrew also writes under the pen name 'Jane D. Everly' for his HAVELOCK series of novels. Look for his first upper middle grade novel HAIR IN ALL THE WRONG PLACES available now fromMonth9Books with the sequel scheduled for release in August 2017.Andrew also co-hosts a geek movie podcast, is working on several new novels, and has a stunning amount of other ideas. He now lives happily in the Okanagan Valley, BC with one beautiful wife, three kids, one cat, one needy dog, and a multitude of characters that live comfortably inside of his mind.Andrew is represented by Mark Gottlieb at the Trident Media Group.

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[shard010]

"Deadpool knows Peter is Spiderman, but also knows that Peter doesn't KNOW he knows, so when Peter pisses him off, this is how Wade gets back at him in a way that Peter isn't allowed to acknowledge of get mad at him for"-blantently copied from someone else's reblog.

Also, would this mean Deadpool then instigate this weird game of chicken at some point? And would other people and heros have some cameos? (Bear Witness to the chaos that is their developing relationship and around them)

spideypool but it's a comedy of errors