#eight kids and a tired hero seems like a family to me (plus two actual adults thank god)

[livyartdump]

misc art dump ("RE"MA, Eight kids, Chaos Class, Zu, FT, Lady Butterfly, ???)

[words-writ-in-starlight]

OMG that sky high fic was grrrreat. Let me rant about it... I feel like will and layla are little pure cinnamon rolls. And everyone's reactions with their powers was great. And yeah that mad science class could use some theory. I really want to see warren's mom's reaction to him having friends over.

(the first bit, the bit with the Strongholds)

It’s seven-thirty PM when Meilin Peace comes home and finds Warren pointing a knife at Zack.

It’s not as bad as it sounds.

“Glowstick, I swear to god, you touch those carrots again and we’re gonna see if you leak neon,” Warren snaps as Zack reaches out, and Zack holds both hands up in surrender and scuttles back when Warren brandishes the knife at him menacingly.  “Not the peppers, either,” Warren adds, and turns toward the sound of the door opening.

It’s not a big apartment--two bedrooms, one bathroom, not in a great neighborhood. They have about five square feet of counter space in the kitchen/living room, and when the front door is open it blocks the hall to the bedrooms, opening right into the main room.  With six teenagers scattered across the couch and floor, plus the kitchen table, it looks smaller than ever.

The relevant thing, though, is that when his mom walks through the door, she has a perfectly good view of Warren, the knife, and Zack, frozen with one guilty hand outstretched toward the bell peppers.

For a moment, Warren considers that he probably should have called her.  She looks alarmed, sort of--not really concerned about Warren’s physical health, because she more or less put that one to bed after he got kicked through a concrete wall, but clearly concerned about the rest of the situation.  She has her hair tied back and the fresh-scrubbed look of someone just out of a rapid shower, and she’s wearing a hoodie rather than her paramedic’s coat, and her dark eyes settle on each of the teenagers blinking at her in turn before she looks back to Warren.

“Hi, Mom,” he says, and goes back to cutting up the carrots before Zack can reboot and start risking his fingers again.  “Mom, everyone.  Everyone, this is my mom.  I expected you to be back a couple hours ago.”

“Sorry, baby.  Transport up to the Trauma One,” she says.  “And then cleaning the rig.  What--the hell is happening right now?”

“Mrs. Peace!” Layla says gamely, jumping up and offering her hand.  “It’s so great to meet you!  We’re friends of Warren’s, from school, and uh, he offered to let us do our homework here!”

“It’s Miss,” she says, bemused, and shakes Layla’s hand, eyes still on Warren.  “You must be Layla.”

“Aw, Warren talks about us,” Magenta drawls.  

Meilin grins a little at that.  “Complains, mostly.  Come here, Warren,” she adds, and Warren leaves the cutting board to go over and let her pull him down into a hug.  “Are you all right with them here, baby?” she murmurs into his ear while he’s there.

“They’re fine,” he says as he straightens up again.  “Probably all going to fail their classes, but they’re fine.”  

She holds him there for a moment, studies him, and Warren can’t blame her.  He hasn’t brought friends home since he was a kid on playdates, before--well, Before.  That means that the last few hours have been.  Strange.  Not bad, but foreign, unnerving and uncomfortable.  He tries to let her see what he means, tries to let her see that he’s trying for the first time in fucking forever and that it’s awful and exhausting and he doesn’t want the others to leave, and she nods slowly before giving him a clap on the shoulder.

“All right, then,” Meilin decides.  “What are you making?”

“Fried rice,” Warren says.  “Did you eat already?”

“No,” she says, crossing the room and taking Warren’s seat at the table.  “Transport, like I said.  And is he all right?” she adds, nodding to Ethan in the other seat, where he’s all but vibrating.

“He’s like that,” Magenta says.  “I’m Magenta, Miss Peace.”

“Wow,” Ethan says before Meilin can answer, eyes wide behind his glasses.  “You’re Adamant.”

It’s been a really long time since Warren saw his mother speechless, and he grins to himself as he chases Zack off the carrots again and dumps the lot into the wok.

Everyone knows that his mother was a hero, Before.  If pressed, they might even be able to remember that Baron Battle fought with a partner, sometimes, a petite Chinese woman who couldn’t be harmed.  But for some reason, no one ever seems to expect to meet her.  It makes parent-teacher conferences...entertaining.

“I...was,” Meilin says warily.  “Nice to meet you.”

“Wow!” Ethan says again, bouncing in his seat.  “It’s such an honor to meet you, Miss Adamant--uh, Miss Peace, really, it is, I had no idea you were Warren’s mom.  Is that why he can just walk stuff off?  I mean, I assumed it was a healing factor, you know, those come with weird powers sometimes, but real invulnerability is so rare!”

“He’s like this,” Warren says when his mother looks to him.  “Popsicle, pipe down.”

“I like him,” Meilin says, and smiles at Ethan.  It strikes him silent like he’s just seen an angel.  Warren goes back to the stove and tries not to look too smug.  Once upon a time, Adamant wasn’t just known for her heroics and her intelligence--she was a famous beauty, back in the day.  Still is, as far as Warren is concerned.  He always wished he looked like her, as a kid.  Even more after he got older and started growing into his father’s face.

There’s a sound of confusion from the couch, and Warren pauses to take a breath.  Layla makes a noise--like maybe she tried to get across the room and didn’t quite make it in time.

“Hang on,” Stronghold says, because apparently his good sense lasts exactly eight minutes.  “My parents said Adamant’s civilian name was Meilin Guerra.”

Warren closes his eyes.

“You’ll be Mister Stronghold,” Meilin says, perfectly civil.  “Very nice to meet you.”

“Changed it, after everything,” Warren says shortly, opening his eyes to shoot a glare over his shoulder.  “Obviously.”

“Right,” Stronghold says, cowed.  “Obviously.  Um.  Sorry.  It’s, uh, really nice to meet you, Miss Peace.  Sorry about--”

“Dude,” Zack interrupts before the sentence can get worse. “Probably just.  Stop.”

Magenta makes a wry sound.  “A rare moment of insight from the living lightbulb.  Will, try and keep your foot out of your mouth for twenty minutes, you were doing so well.”

“As far as I can tell, it runs in the family,” Meilin says, not unkindly, and Ethan actually sputters a laugh.  Warren can practically taste Stronghold’s blush, but it’s not worth having this fight again.  Meilin moves on.  “Although, while we’re on the subject, do you mind if I ask why you kids are doing homework here?  I thought you were planning to be, quote, ‘out doing something stupid’, baby.”

“Did something stupid,” Warren confirms.  “Now we’re here.  Still got all my fingers and toes, though.  Glowstick, pass me that cumin--it’s the one that says cumin on it, Jesus Christ.”

Layla clears her throat delicately and says, “We were going to do homework at the Strongholds’ house, but um.  That didn’t happen.”

“Warren.”

“He didn’t do anything!” Zack protests.

“I know he didn’t do anything,” Meilin says, and Warren can feel the way she’s squinting at him, suddenly looking for hurts like she used to when he came home from middle school holding his ribs gingerly.  

“It was fine,” he says, splashing soy sauce vaguely in the direction of the wok and getting a fair amount on the burner, where it crackles in the flame.  “Don’t worry about it.”  Honestly?  Warren wasn’t really planning to tell her.  She works twenty-four hour shifts because they pay better, and she doesn’t need to worry about him.  He’s spent half of his life trying to make it so that his mom doesn’t need to worry about him--at first by being compliant, then by being the toughest thing around.  He’s not about to let the Strongholds wreck that.

“I’m--really sorry,” Stronghold says, almost--what, miserable?  Warren’s tired of trying to decode people.  “I had no idea--I just figured--I thought they were...better than that, I guess.”  

Warren turns around in time to see his mom’s eye soften a little.

“Yeah, well,” she sighs.  “Live and learn.  What’s your name, Stronghold?”

“God, you really are related,” Magenta says, fascinated.

“It’s Will,” Stronghold says over the rush of slightly shaky laughter that trickles through the room.  “It’s nice to meet you, Miss Peace.  Sorry about kicking Warren through that wall that time.  I didn’t really know what I was doing.”

“Well, he had that one coming,” Meilin says, and Warren makes an offended sound, because she’s expecting him to, but this is...better.  Calmer.  His hands are steady when he starts putting fried rice on plates.  “And if you five are going to be a regular presence, you’d better call me Meilin.”

[ficdirectory]

Disuphere (An AU Fosters family fic) Chapter 51

CHAPTER 51

THEN

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Missing: 4 years, 1 month and 5 days

6:02 AM

New Kid had been around for nine days when He woke up Josh with a brutal shove.  Hitting the floor hard, Josh jumped to his feet.  Wide awake now, Josh focused on His hands.  On what He was holding:

“Got a job for you,” He said, tossing it to him.  

The clock read 6 AM.  Josh wondered when he would have time to get ready for school.  But he knew better than to ask.  Just walked outside, the gun at his back.  Josh was wide awake as He put a chain around his ankle.

“I got important things to do today,” He said cryptically.  “So I’m gonna tell you this once, and I don’t want to have to repeat myself.”

Josh nodded.  Heart pounding, as He gave instructions for exactly what He needed Josh to do.

Dig a hole:

Five feet across.  Six feet deep.

Right next to where He’d buried Jacob exactly sixteen months ago.

He liked New Kid - called him perfect, even.  So, Josh’s hunch right off had been true: no need for two of something if one was perfect and the other was too old.

Josh swallowed.

This hole was for him; he was digging his own grave.

9:25 AM

Normally, Wednesday mornings meant work at Anchor Beach.  However with the stress of Jesus’s disappearance, plus other difficulties (Lena’s health crisis when she was pregnant with Frankie, Frankie’s early birth and hospitalization plus her recent diagnosis to name a few)  Lena found herself taking mental health days occasionally, on the advice of her therapist.

Lena dressed Frankie and sang to her softly: “When I see your face, there’s not a thing that I would change - because you’re amazing just the way you are.”

Frankie fussed through the process but quieted as soon as she was free to move around again.  Even with all the kids in school, taking care of Frankie was time-consuming.  It was overwhelming.  Lena didn’t know the first thing about parenting a baby with CP.

If she let herself, Lena became overrun by self-doubt, by blame and sadness.  But she had paid attention to the way Stef had framed the diagnosis for the kids and to their reactions, too.  They weren’t sad and grieving, because Stef presented it as fact.  Not one of the kids asked what might have caused it or even seemed interested in how it came to be.  Frankie was their sister.

Sometimes, it helped to imagine that Frankie had been dropped off as a foster baby.  That way, Lena could leave her own guilt out of the equation and focus on loving her as she came.

“Do you want to go to the pumpkin patch today?” Lena asked Frankie, who giggled and crawled away, wanting to be chased.

“We are going to get seven pumpkins and decorate them, and get all ready for Halloween.  What do you think about that?  Should we call Mom at work?  See what she thinks?”

“Mom,” Frankie nodded.

When Stef picked up, sounding tense, Lena put the phone to their daughter’s ear and coached her, so she said, “Hi, Mom!”

“Hey, my baby!  How are you?” Stef gushed, perking up immediately.

Lena whispered “pumpkin patch” in Frankie’s ear, and she repeated: “Munkin-bat?”

“Really?  Well that sounds fascinating.  I’m gonna talk to Mama now, yes?  I love you, Frankie.”

“Ah-ya-you Mom!”

It wasn’t until Lena got on the phone herself that she realized her mistake: seven pumpkins.  Not eight.

12:37 PM

Josh had been digging for hours.  His arms were sore and his legs were tired but he kept going.  Had to go fast enough to look like he was making progress but not too slow either because he wanted to stay alive.

His heart tripped in his chest.  “Jacob?” he said in his head.

It made sense if Jacob was trying to get a message to him - and that message especially - right now.  But it kind of destroyed Josh, too.  It made him think back to the last time he tried to get away.

(They tried to get away.)

Josh was gonna have to do so much different this time.  Like not try to be a damn hero for one thing.  If he was gonna get out of here (and if he was gonna be any good to New Kid) Josh knew he couldn’t involve him.  Safer for him to try something first.  But what?

Ever since He first brought New Kid here, Josh had been thinking about it.  Mariana’s way of acting out stuck in his head.  He could use that.  Probably.  If he could think of the rest.

Josh’s stomach growled but he kept digging.  Not thinking about what he was doing but what he was going to do.  Had to stay quiet and do what He wanted until just the right moment.  Knew better than to yell for help.  Around here, they’d just think it was some kid playing a game, not real life.  And he needed to be sure to stay alive long enough to actually get away.

“Mom?” he tried in his head.  “Mama?  Mari?  Brandon?  If you guys are there, tell me what to do and I’ll do it, okay, I promise.  Just tell me.”

“You are so damn slow!  What is wrong with you, dumbass?” He asked, jerking Josh’s leg chain and making him fall.

Josh almost passed out because he was thinking of Jacob and the way he squeaked and skidded across the linoleum.  Josh remembered staring at the hacksaw in the corner of the living room - glad He didn’t have it with Him and Jacob Down There.  Josh thought about how frozen he was that time.  

“You can’t get stuck this time, bud.  Stand up.  Keep going.  You have to keep going.”  Mama.  Inside his head after all.

Josh stood and started digging even faster.

“That’s more like it,” He said.  “Now I got work this afternoon, and you’re gonna stay out here and keep digging.  If you half-ass it, I’ll know.  If you try anything, I’ll know.  You got one job.  What is it?”

“Dig,” Josh said, voice flat.

“Jesus,” Mama said in his head.  “You’re safer in public, love.  See if you can go to school tomorrow--”

“--But make it seem like His idea,” Mom butted in.

Josh kept digging: “Are my teachers mad at me?”

“How the hell should I know?”

“For being absent.  I’m usually not ever.  I just thought, you know, they might be mad.”  Rambling.  Not good.  Josh was quiet, thinking, but kept his face blank.

“Can I be absent tomorrow, too?” he asked carefully.

He grinned an evil grin.  “Oh, you’re gonna be absent for a long time…”

Josh puffed out a breath.  Full-on Level 1 to help him fake it: relief.  “Awesome.  ‘Cause I have this huge test in pre-algebra coming up tomorrow, and I am not ready for it.  It’s good news I’ll miss it, right?”  Josh kept his eyes on the dirt.  Ears tuned the the rhythm of the shovel. Could practically hear the gears turning in His head.

“Oh, I think you can go to school one more day.  Can’t have you missing that test…” He said, even happier now.

Josh’s mouth dropped open.  “You said I got to be absent for a long time, though!” he exclaimed (pissed, not scared, no tears.)

“You will be.  After tomorrow.  Keep digging, dumbass.  By the way?  Your room?  Is going to Caleb,” He said over His shoulder.  “Enjoy it while you got it.”

“Where am I gonna sleep?” Josh insisted, more fake anger at His unfairness.  Keep digging.  Hard.  Josh had to make it look like he got more energy from being mad.

“Oh, I’ll find a place for you, don’t worry.  Dig.  Dumbass.”

Once He was in the house, and Josh still had his back to the door, Josh breathed out.  It worked.  It actually worked.  He couldn’t resist an opportunity to make Josh know how dumb he was, so he was going to school.

Excitement and terror crashed inside him.  School was a good Part One.  But what was he gonna do next?  How was he gonna get out of here?

“Stay focused, love.” Mama.

“We’re right with you.”  Mom.

The wind blew rustling the leaves on the trees around him:

“Stay alive,” they whispered.

Goosebumps rose on his arms.  

“I’m trying, Jacob.  I’m really trying,” Josh whispered back.

[helloworlddemo1122-yahoopar-blog]

'Westworld' Star Zahn McClarnon on His Character's Huge Moment and If We’ll Ever Reach The Door (Exclusive)

WARNING: Spoilers ahead! Do not proceed if you haven't watched this week's episode of Westworld!

Zahn McClarnon had never acted in a love story on screen. He’d also never worked with children -- or Anthony Hopkins -- but he got to do all those things in just one episode of Westworld.

The 51-year-old actor joined the HBO series this season as Akecheta, a Ghost Nation host whom viewers had previously only seen in a terrifying light, seemingly on his way to abduct Maeve’s (Thandie Newton) daughter in flashbacks, or trying to scalp other hosts and guests. It was on Sunday night’s episode, however, that we finally got some backstory, and realized Akecheta wasn’t at all what he seemed.

In fact, he was one of the first hosts to discover the maze and reach consciousness, and became fully aware of his change in storyline. Scalping was another way of prompting others find the maze, and he was trying to help Maeve’s daughter, not hurt her. All this, plus the reveal that Akecheta was the first host to see the door made Sunday’s episode a powerful one -- especially for McClarnon.

HBO

The actor, who described straddling the White world and the Native world as he grew up 30 miles from the reservation where his grandparents lived, had more than typecasting or lack of roles to overcome when he scored his part on Westworld. McClarnon was also sidelined as filming began, halting production for an injury he suffered at home. He’s alright now -- “I’m doing wonderful,” he assured ET over the phone on Thursday -- and couldn’t be more thrilled for viewers to finally see what he’s been working on.

“You just don’t get those opportunities, especially being an actor of Native American descent. The storylines just aren’t out there,” he explained. “It was a beautiful experience, and I hope as an actor, I get to explore more of that.”

So what happens next for Akecheta, and does he ever reach the door? Read on to find out.

ET: This episode contained huge reveals for your character. What was your reaction when you read the script for the first time?

It wasn't actually a script. [Showrunners] Jonah [Nolan] and Lisa [Joy] work in a bit of a different way, a unique way. I didn't see a whole script, it was more in pieces. And I was just excited to be a part of such a great show like Westworld and joining the family of HBO. I was a big fan before I got the job of the television show, and it's just very unique and bold storytelling, and I was very happy to be a part of it.

Did they tell you your character would have this huge part in the storyline when you signed on?

Roughly. You know, they kind of give you a vague outline of what their ideas are and you just take that information and try to process it and ask a lot of questions and hit your mark and be honest with it, and I found it to be a very different way of working and a very unique and actually very positive way of working. It just kind of woke up different strengths and processes of my acting, and I'll take that and hopefully use it in different productions. And I learned quite a bit from Jonah and Lisa and the whole team.

There was a lot packed into one episode, revealing so much of your character’s backstory.

Obviously these characters of Ghost Nation are prominent in and out of season one. They were mysterious. They didn't talk much about them. When I found out that in season two, they were going to explore a bit more, first off, I was just excited and privileged to be cast as the character that's going to be focused on in exploring the Ghost Nation and being around this creative team, was just a great opportunity and I had a lot of fun.

We got this heartbreaking reveal that all along, Akecheta was trying to protect Maeve’s daughter, not hurt her. What was it like to film that moment?

It's so easy to work off of the young actress, [Jasmyn Rae]. But all I had to do was just look at her, and she looked at me, and it was so easy to react off of her emotions. She's such a talented young actress, and I've never worked with a kid before, so I've gotten a lot of opportunities in the show to do stuff I've never done, including the love story. I'm just usually cast as different types of characters, so I was very excited to pursue those different sides of Zahn and layer in the character Akecheta.

You touched on something really important right now: representation. The Native American characters in this show are hosts, so it’s not necessarily a true depiction. How did you get into character?

Just bringing my experiences of growing up in the culture, as a Native American who was in and out of the reservation area, whose grandparents live on the reservation, uncles and aunts, and would go to the reservation, and living 30 miles away from the reservation. So experiencing both worlds, the White world and the Native world, and how I was treated in both cultures, not really fitting in. I brought a lot of that to the character. And because Ghost Nation are kind of outside characters as well, within the storyline, you don't see a lot of them, they're kind of different from a lot of the hosts, I was able to tap into that experience of growing up. And it's a tribe made up from Ford's [Anthony Hopkins] mind, so especially the Ghost Nation characters, don't have to be culturally accurate. They can be those characters made up from the mind of a European man who thinks this is what a tribe would be.

I want to talk about your scene with Anthony Hopkins, who nobody knew was returning to Westworld until just a couple episodes ago. Was it hard to keep that secret?

Yes, definitely hard to keep that secret (laughs), because I'm working with one of the greatest actors in the history of acting and one of my personal heroes. It was hard not to tell people I had just done a scene with Anthony Hopkins, because they would know he was back in the show, et cetera.

It was a wonderful experience. It was again, a unique experience, because I had to do something that most of the other hosts didn't have to do, and that was kind of freeze, but freeze in a different way where I could react, without going into that analysis mode, fight against what was happening. “We want you to hold this 10 pound knife in your hand and freeze and say your dialogue and struggle with it.” So it was a learning experience, for sure. And what an amazing experience to sit across from Anthony Hopkins -- brilliant, brilliant, and such a beautiful human being. In between takes, I got to know him a little bit, and he's just a wonderful human being.

Was that knife really 10 pounds?

It was at least six pounds. It was a huge knife. Yes, my arm got really tired holding that thing up for eight hours (laughs). It was a real knife, it was a very large knife, so yes, it had some weight to it, definitely.

HBO

And what about makeup, did that take a long time to get into?

Makeup was difficult. You know, probably the hardest part of the job was the makeup and going through that process everyday, putting on that -- it's like a glue paint -- and Jonah and Lisa wanted a specific look for it, where it cracked, more like a mud. It takes a long time to put it on. It's very cold to put on, and I endured a lot of hours of freezing my butt off and getting that paint put on, and it took 45 minutes to an hour to take it off. The whole process, we got it down to an hour and a half, I think, to put on. In the beginning, it was a few hours.

Bringing it back to the storyline this season, your character knows maybe more than any other host about the door -- what can you tell us about it?

Well, I think he sees the forge being built, the door, and I think Akecheta realizes at that point when he does see it, that it's the wrong world for him. And if he devotes pretty much the rest of his time finding that door. It's hard to go any further with that without ruining the next few episodes.

Will we reach the door this season?

I don't know (laughs). I can't tell you that. It would ruin it. I can say Akecheta devotes himself to finding that door -- and that's about as far as I can go.

Westworld airs Sundays at 9 p.m. ET/PT on HBO. See more on the series in the video below.

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[theowlsarenotwhattheyremembers]

Episode Seven: The Dragon and the Wolf

Cocks and Blood.

I don’t know how many levels of irony Scene One was on. The Unsullied, last heard of / forgotten after having pointlessly won Casterly Rock pre-stripped of food and besieged, are now lined up in well-fed ranks, because of plot nihilism. Jaime and Bronn discuss blood (family) and cocks and how they have them but the Unsullied don’t but then the barbarously virile Dothraki turn up with clearly more and bigger cocks apiece than any Lannister or lannlackey. What does all this mean? Is there an answer? Maybe, in the end, it is just cocks.

Look I know this recap is about a fortnight overdue. I have had to hand in a dissertation and then I was tired. We are all tired. This shit is tiring. Settle down. Rest. We have an hour and twenty minutes to get through and darn it we are going to escape from everything that’s tiring us out through lushly cinematographised fanfic cocks and all. Who doesn’t like cocks? Cocks cocks cocks.

Let’s carry on.

Scene Two: Tyrion lets Jon know that the leaping loins of Fleabottom have populated the city with a million warm sweaty bodies. King’s Landing, when compared to other cities of the early modern period, is bigger than any European city was ever, after Rome fell, until the Industrial Revolution. It’s more like the equivalent of Beijing or Edo-period Tokyo. Cool! This is, Jon observes, bigger than the entire North, and they’re all going to be ice wights unless our heroes prevail. Why would anyone want to live with all those other people?? The fucking’s better, Tyrion explains.

Scene Three: The bagged ice wight has retained its horrid vigour!!! Does this mean that the White Walkers can’t take unlife away once they’ve given it? (Does anything mean anything any more)

Scene Four: Cersei tells her undead henchlump to kill everyone.

Scene Five: Dragons understand that property is theft and children can be delicious if you are a large fanged lizard, so they had to be put in prison, which destroyed them and the vigour they animated the Targaryen blood with, Tyrion lets Missandei know. Then we have a massive reunion pile-on! The feels get mushy as Pod+Tyrion “you can suck his magic cock later”, the Hound+Brienne (Arya’s ultraviolent fosterfam are so proud of her!)

, and Bronn+Tyrion “I’ll pay you double”. That everyone is about to die is vigorously foreshadowed making me extremely anxious, but the pre-tension is pissed up the wall and everyone settles down for a civil conversation, because nothing matters any more. Tyrion+Cersei. The Hound+The Mountain, brothers, death and unlife can’t change blood, blood runs strong and hot, it’s the end of the world but #cleganebowl has been written in ruddier ink than this multideaths-are-coming tensionmusic can inscribe. Then the Queen herself arrives, atop her non-cock Drogon, who envelops with flame but does not penetrate (but wait till the final scene when Ice Viserion fucks the wall). Everyone is v impressed with Daenerys’ lady-D and how unambiguously it testifies to the rights her blood demands. Prophecy music plays. Cersei is upstaged. Did you know that the Lannisters are basically just nouveau-riche - their Age of Heroes ancestor Lann the Clever wasn’t even a king or a god like the other aristocrats? At best he was only the bastard son of one. Uncle Euron taunts Theon about his sister; but Tyrion/Cersei shut him up. These guys, the Greyjoys, trace their line back to the Grey King, who won a war against the Storm God, married a mermaid, and lived for a thousand years (i.e. was basically some form of deity himself). Seems likely Theon’ll bounce back eventually. They do the show and tell with the wight and then Euron storms off pretending to go home but actually going to pick up the legendary mercenary army Cersei just hired. Qyburn is definitely not on the side of the living. These guys are evil!! Cersei makes a pretend offer to help but Jon Snow is full truth, in love, with fire in his blood and his britches, so he messes up the fake negotiations.

Scene Six: Tyrion+Cersei chat over wine, and Cersei wins by letting Tyrion think he’s found her out for being pregnant. Tyrion points out that Daenerys isn’t a foreign whore who can be abducted, beaten up or intimidated, because of her blood and non-D.

But as @lasophus points out this (not this actually, violent death, usually via crossbow / arrow penetration) has happened to literally every other lowblood foreign whore (Ros Shae Ygritte Osha), plus all the lesbians. But not Daenerys! But Cersei Plannister has a plan. She doesn’t kill Tyrion because of blood / because otherwise the dragons and the dothraki and the unsullied would torch the city. She plays him instead.

Scene Seven:

Daenerys: I can’t have children

Jon: *hip thrust* oh really, let me introduce you to this gentleman here, I call him The Dragon

Daenerys: *swoons*

Scene Eight: I think Sansa was always playing LF but also kind of also knew he was her only friend and the only person who approached understanding her, but then her brother explained to her that LF was super betraying her so she had to kill him whoops getting ahead of myself

Scene Nine: Since diarising a meeting between Daenerys and The Dragon Jon in this war strategy meeting is looking at her with the disrespectful pout/halfsmile of the total lad who knows he’s about to get laid, and they arrange to take a ship up to the north together despite the danger because they have a very BUSY schedule.

Scene Ten: Jon lifts a finger to be on Theon’s recovery team, by telling him that it’s ok to follow his blood and save his sister.

Scene Eleven: Theon wins a fight and assumes his bloodright as sea prince by virtue of not having a penis. He staggers out into the surf and is rebaptised in the cold salty water as destiny music plays. I guess actually some cephalopods don’t have penises.

Scene Twelve: Sansa stands in a snowstorm making a difficult decision: yes she is going to go ahead with it. She gets flunkies to bring her sister to the Great Hall, and there, in front of all the ballachingly obstreperous northern lords, explains how LF has been the villain all along (via Bran’s magical insights). “How do you answer these charges ....... Lord Baelish???”, she reveals, as our prayers for Arya turn into a globe-spanning cry of BAZINGA!! It was us who underestimated the girls all along, and believed in their fights when actually they were just putting it on for the benefit of the spy at the keyhole and the viewer at home!!

“I deny it! None of you were there to see what happened,” LF says, no longer himself but just a plot toy setting himself up for Bran to coolly recollect that actually he was there to see it and all other things; an accusation based on magic which the northern lords don’t have any reason to believe in but which still floors our arch-manipulator to his knees, begging for his life. “Thank you for all your many lessons, Lord Baelish,” Sansa says to her friend and teacher, weeping, then delivers the nod to Arya, who slits his throat. As his blood spills we may reflect on how LF has been dead since the beginning of the season.

LF is of low blood and uses his tongue not his dick, so we do not have room for him any more. LF makes the plot diverge off in weird complicated directions, so we do not have room for him any more.

He killed Ros though

BAZINGA

Scene Thirteen: Another one of those tricksy bitches and Sansa’s other teacherenemy Cersei Lannister reveals the Plannister to Dummbister Jaime: just wait in the south until all the enemies have marched north to turn into an army of wights (which then maybe Qyburn could do something about or maybe I don’t care because “I’ll do anything to protect my family” is just madbitch speak for “I am now aligned with the forces of death”). Jaime is not with the programme because He Made a Promise and is aligned with the forces of the living after Brienne+Jaime met up and she worked her customary powers on his moral fibre. Despite basically giving the order to kill him Cersei flubs it at the last minute and Jaime walks away from her, finally choozing the right floozy, as Cersei makes an impotent I’m-not-evil-enough-yet fist.

Then we have a really nice and eerie snow scene where a christmas-y version of the title song plays and King’s Landing gets dusted with white. Winter coming maybe can be nice or cause people to do good things because of christmas?? I fucking love christmas!

Scene Fourteen: Sam’s initial reaction to Bran telling him he became the three-eyed raven is the kind of “Oh!” you’d give your kid if it told you it made friends with a stegosaur in school that day, but then has the wits to ask the follow-up question which has thusfar eluded other characters: “I don’t know what that means?”, and Bran delivers a semi-coherent explanation, representing, together with his material use to the case against LF, marked progress from the days when he was just scaring and upsetting people. Why is Bran so intent on telling Jon that he’s actually Aegon Targaryen, the true heir to the Iron Throne and D’s nephew, when he is, just this precise moment, eagerly performing eagerly-anticipated activities with D on a ship?? In these circs it seems like it would just be upsetting news which could threaten an alliance pleasant to both parties and vital to humanity. Whose side is Bran on?

Scene Fifteen: This conversation, “does it bother you that I’m the Lady of Winterfell”, “no obviously not let me introduce myself”, “I never could have survived what you survived, not like what I said in front of LF that one time”, feels like their first make-up-and-closure chat, which makes it seem like they weren’t pretending the whole time. Unbazinga.

(Direwolf thoughts: Sansa’s direwolf is dead and she’s totally different to how she was before and also not so much of a Stark (she didn’t swing the sword though she passed the sentence; she rules LF/Cersei-wise not starkly); Bran’s wolf died (at the moment his three-eyed-raven skills got transferred into him) and now being Bran is just one memory amongst millions of others; Arya’s is alive and thriving and she is the same as always and thriving; Jon’s is for all we know still alive and ditto (D got his chilly post-dead juices heated up again); Rickon’s wolf died and then he did.)

Scene Sixteen: Oh yeah, the ice dragon. Seems everyone this episode, including this recapper, just had too much darn stuff on their plates to mention to each other about you know how the White Walkers can reanimate corpses - people, bears, horses, giants, so on, he has a fucking ice dragon now obviously, climate change has nuclear weapons now obviously, everything is fucked, obviously.