#edit: oh yeah also as far as headcanons... he’s trans. everyone is trans. fuck yeah that’s not even a headcanon it’s just canon

[gonzo-rella]

Headcanons: Being Wallace Wells' Trans Boyfriend

MASTERLIST | AO3 | KO-FI

EDIT: Although this fic was written with a more binary trans reader in mind, I'm hoping this fic will also be suitable for AFAB nonbinary people who are masc or male adjacent, which is where I might be at. I'm currently working dating hcs for Wallace with a nonbinary reader (which will be suitable for both AFAB and AMAB readers).

Relationship(s): Wallace Wells x transmasc!reader (romantic)

Warnings/info: Trans typical stuff, like dysphoria, transphobia etc. etc., sexual remarks, he/him pronouns for reader, headcanons were written in one sitting, when I was feeling not great. (Let me know if I need to add any)

(A/N: I've been reading a lot of Succession fics over the last few days. Last night I read a Roman Roy fic and for some reason it gave me this overpowering wave of dysphoria that I still have yet to fully recover from. Annoyingly, I have yet to actually watch Succession so this could have been avoided; I just think Kieran Culkin's hot and very gender so I couldn't resist pretending that someone with his face was my boyfriend. Reading about Roman made me think 'oh shit. Maybe I'm a flawed and pathetic little guy on the inside. But I just look like a woman who likes to kiss women and everyone treats me like a girl and uses my girl name and girl pronouns and that feels super gross and makes me want to live in a hole. Now I'm going to feel bad about that for the next few days.' So, yeah, I'm having another transmasc crisis that I'm using fanfiction to get me through. I figured Kieran Culkin started this, so I might as well write something featuring a character of his that I can actually write for. This is a self-indulgent and self-explorative treat for myself, but I hope that transmasc readers can enjoy this, too. If you'd like more Wallace stuff, trans stuff or Wallace AND trans stuff, feel free to send in a request. I really want to provide more fics for transmasc readers because you guys are super underrepresented (and, y'know, Papa Gonzo-rella wants to explore his gender a little more). Also, I swear that I will get around to watching Succession, and I more than likely will end up writing for it when I do.)

Respectfully, Wallace does not give a shit that you’re trans.

Of course, he doesn’t flat-out ignore it, because it’s part of who you are, but it isn’t an obstacle in your relationship by any means, and it doesn’t bother him in the slightest.

If you’re feeling dysphoric and/or otherwise insecure about yourself, he’ll pinch your cheeks and tell you how handsome and sexy you are.

If you’re feeling especially bad, like ‘not getting out of bed and hiding from the world’ bad, he’ll keep you company and say what he can to reassure you.

Being mushy and sincere truly isn’t his thing, so whatever he says will sound either slightly insensitive (but still pretty sensitive as far as Wallace goes), facetious or like he wants you to get over how you’re feeling so he can fuck you.

But, he genuinely doesn’t want you to feel bad and you can tell he cares, because otherwise he wouldn’t be there for you when you're feeling your worst.

Wallace is very affirming, but in his own Wallace way.

He lovingly refers to you as his lameass boyfriend.

If Scott ever compliments you about anything, Wallace will call him gay.

He will shout ‘gay’, like the Senor Chang meme.

"Hey, man, I like your shirt-"

"Ha, Scott's gay!"

"I-I'm not gay! I just like his shirt."

"What's wrong with being gay, Scott?"

"Nothing! There's nothing wrong with being gay!"

"You really need to work on your internalised homophobia, Scott. To think, my gay lover and I share a bed with a bigot."

If you’re doing anything that he knows will make you dysphoric or exacerbate your dysphoria (for example, scrolling through social media and looking at cis dudes that give you gender envy) he’ll shut it down.

Using the aforementioned example, he’ll snatch your phone off you and close the app, saying: “Nope. Make better decisions.”

And, while you’d initially be annoyed at him for grabbing your phone, you will appreciate it in the long run.

If you have testosterone shots but you’re not a fan of doing them yourself, he’ll begrudgingly help you with them.

He will make a very Wallace comment, though

“Stabbing? I didn’t know you were that kinky.”

If anyone’s a dick to you about being trans, Wallace is always ready to go with a snide remark about the other person, because of all the things you could possibly mock his lameass boyfriend for, being trans is at the bottom of that list.

(He should know, as the person who makes fun of you the most.)

Also, he cares about you very, very much and he doesn't want people being transphobic to his boyfriend.

If you’re cool with it, he will make trans jokes, but nothing ‘attack helicopter’ or ‘attack helicopter’ adjacent, because he’s too clever for that and he can come up with better material that isn’t just derivative, transphobic garbage.

If you get your period and it makes you at all dysphoric, be prepared for this exchange:

“Don’t worry. Scott pissed blood last month and cried about it and he’s still a man.”

“Did-did he go to the doctor?”

“I don’t know. He seems fine now, though.”

If you still have boobs and don’t mind them being touched or otherwise acknowledged, he will use them like a pillow.

If you decide to get top surgery, he will make the following request:

“Well, if you’re not using them, can I have them? I need a pillow that Scott won’t steal. And, he wouldn’t steal your tits, because he knows I’d call him gay for it.”

“Why are you like this, Wallace?”

“Selfish.”

Being trans doesn’t make your relationship much different from any of Wallace’s other relationships.

You’re just, for better or worse, another one of Wallace’s boyfriends.

[elfindreams]

Hit me with ur sans opinions

OKAY HERE WE GO

Favorite thing:

Despite him being an apathetic shitposter, I really like how Sans is... actually a pretty hopeful person? Dude’s secretly depressed as shit even though that “ohhh okay yeah that’s what’s going on, huh” moment only comes quite late in the game and you see what his room looks like, and of course the Lost Soul dialogue during the final boss fight. But he has friends and shows interest in his normal hobbies and sincerely wants to be Frisk’s friend, in the murder route he apparently held out hope that if the player was shown enough kindness, you would willingly go back and fix all the bad things you did and be everyone’s friend instead. Like, way past the point where that clearly wasn’t going to happen. My man is TRYING SO HARD

Least favorite thing:

There are a myriad of Sans-related things which evoke responses from me ranging from disinterested apathy to a mild eyeroll to rabid frothing rage, but none of it has anything to do with the character himself, so it feels unfair to count that against ‘em... uhhh I bet he’s the type of person to talk with their mouth absolutely FULL of food and it would enrage me even more than it usually does because HOW ARE YOU EVEN DOING THAT SIR

Favorite line of dialogue:

Yeah yeah there are the intensely raw lines everyone chooses, and rightfully so, but I got a soft spot in my heart for the prank call where he asks if your refrigerator is running, and if you try to be contrary by saying no, he responds with “ok, i’ll send someone over to fix it. thanks for letting me know. good communication is important”. I seem to remember yelling something like “askdjdbdp YEAH OKAY THANKS SANS, THANKS” at the screen when it happened in my first play through, and my brother cackling bc he didn’t get that call when he played the game and didn’t even know to expect it.

BROTP:

Do actual brothers qualify? If not, uhhh Toriel probably. Joke buddies!

OTP:

I see Sans as pretty much aroace but could equally see him ending up in a very casual FWB thing with Alphys, or in an actual relationship in scenarios where Undyne isn’t in the picture, like the queen Alphys ending. It would be cute and their personalities and general vibes are super compatible imo, but on the flipside I could see their flaws feeding into each other and spiraling downward real quick, especially in the particular scenario of the Queen Alphys ending because uhhh yeah emotional trauma for everybody who didn’t die. Sans is so passive and lazy and conflict-avoidant that he would just enable all of Alphys’ worst behaviors, she would become increasingly isolated and depressed and paranoid and drag him down with her, it would be a mess. (I mean he kind of already does that in canon by helping her keep the Amalgamates a secret instead of intervening in any way??? SHE’S KEEPING PEOPLE LOCKED IN HER BASEMENT DUDE, HOLY SHIT) Sans x a healthier diet and sleep schedule and maybe some talk therapy = the true OTP.

NOTP:

Sans x Frisk. If it’s in the context of a fanwork where Frisk was already an adult when they fell into the Underground, then I guess I won’t HATE it hate it... nah jk I still super hate it, c’mon man why does this literal babeychild need to get shipped with anyone, much less an adult? Let Sans be the goofy sitcom dad figure he was always meant to be, dang it!

Random headcanon:

I’m sure I’ve posted this before but OH WELL, Sans doesn’t actually know what sex is. I mean he appreciates a good 69 joke as much as any not-self-respecting shitposter, but he’s Literally A Talking Cartoon Skeleton and this topic has zero relevance to his life, so he never bothered to look it up or ask anybody. (Papyrus does, though. Confirmed chad.)

Alternatively—

When used against a murderous soul with high LV, Sans’ KARMA ability does damage over time and drains health. However, if a KARMA “attack” were used upon someone with a clean and pure soul, it would have the reverse effect and heal them. Combine that with Sans’ terrible offensive and defensive stats, and you have... a classic white mage with an absolutely BUSTED spell mechanic at his disposal. In a Deltarune-style fight with other party members to physically defend him, all of whom are heroic good guy characters, Sans would make a superb healer. Alas, his abilities are only situationally useful and his boss battle in Undertale is the exact reverse of that scenario, so he’s stuck trying to make do with what he’s got.

(And now I’m having war flashbacks to that dreadful 1v1 fight in Final Fantasy Tactics where I had to minmax my main character’s abilities and equipment and hope to god that the RNG would work out in my favor because all along he’d only ever been expected to fight as part of a team and I hadn’t leveled him up very much... cinematic parallels!)

Unpopular opinion:

Absolutely none, everyone agrees with me and Sir Tobias Foxington himself manifested physically in my house to give me a gold star sticker

Song I associate with them:

uhhh I’ve got a few but how about Many Lives -> 49 MP by Owen Pallett

It’s about a clairvoyant who obsessively stares into the future and keeps seeing/hearing his middle-aged self frantically yelling back through time and urging him to invest more money, dammit. Idk how well the lyrics actually fit but like, VIBES??? lmao

Favorite picture: