#edit: i think i wrote most of this like 2 fucking months ago im so sorry im so bad at answering asks

[rudeboimonster]

What are your thoughts on Bonerattle Arena? Or Side Order? Or Riot Act? Or just this season of Splatoon 3 as a whole

CHRIST SORRY THIS ENDED UP IN MY DRAFTS AND I SPACEDO UT BADLY

looks up like an animal caught eating from a carcass with face covered in visera prlz

shout out to Frankie and Bugs bc the two of em bought Side Order for me

OHGHGHGHGHHGHGH SIDE ORDER

im working on clearing out the prlz store. i just have to to take breaks bc it turns out i forget to blink during levels. this tires my eyes after 2 runs. edit: successfully cleared out prlz store.

interesting note, i can do full clears of Side Order in a similar amount of time as Hades runs! each full run is about 30 minutes, i wonder if thats normal for rougelites i really should play more of them

overall i've been having just an IMMENSE amount of fun with Side Order and it makes me wanna both play more splatoon and more roguelites in general. once i have a computer up and running, i really wanna get back to playing warframe so i can mess with the roguelite mode they put in there, i think that'll help me get back into it. edit: COMPUTER BUILT AND RUNNING but i think i gotta do other changes so i can like, get back to streaming bc i'm running into issues with the OS we had on hand

there's a lot of fun stuff this season in splatoon! iunno if i have much meaningful to say about it all?? i frankly mostly play salmon run and now side order so the whole. rest of the game i have to be really hankering to play it or with friends.

[riacte]

Space Opera AU dashboard simulator

🥧 syrupstars Follow

Anyone else think that Red King racer is a little... y'know... fruity?

👑 falsewellsupremacy Follow

He literally says "ladies, gentlemen, everyone in between, get in line" so I think that answers your question.

🥧 syrupstars Follow

What about the "#Ally4Life 🏳️‍🌈" on his Twilight handle?

👑 falsewellsupremacy Follow

I genuinely have no idea. Maybe he thinks it's about him being an ally to cishet people

#idk ren's just like that sometimes #void knows what he's doing #also prev tags you do not want to get into the black hole of who ren has dated #he has rumours with 3/4 of the grid #edit: WHO MENTIONED BAD BOY TEENAGE REN IN MY NOTES #the shippers are here... oh no #edit 2: not ren at the club.

74 notes

🛑 bluebatshater Follow

oh my voiddd ofc That Duo got p1 again... i need them to dnf in the race. i hope they crash and burn and die and i need crastle to get podium for ONCE. i am so mad. i am calling for the goddess tsuki to curse them. dnf dnf crash burn DIE

🌻 lesbianlumian Follow

the goddess tsuki LITERALLY protects racers and that's why they pray to her? you think the goddess tsuki, creator of lumians, will curse an actual lumian? be so fucking fr

🛑 bluebatshater Follow

if you dont have anything productive to say get off my post. freak

#those blue bats stannies are SO ANNOYING THEY ARE EVERYWHERE #they're overshadowing all the other teams #cant even be a bitchy hater in peace #salt #negativity #hateposting

12 notes

🔮 queenofstarz03 Follow

OMG FALSE IS SO PRETTY SHES MY QUEEN OF HEARTS OMG OMGOMGOGM 💖💖💖💖💖💖 i tihnk im gonna pass out. HER HAIR FLYING IN THE WIND AND HER RED FRECKLES AND HER SMILE WHY IS MY HEART BEATING SO FAST and Ren is hot I guess he's tall like a ferris wheel

🔮 queenofstarz03 Follow

Looking at posts from five years ago is funny like how did I ever believe I was straight

🍦 jelliepopsicle Follow

OP, I think I recognise your url... did you write that viral Bad Boy Ren x QoH fic on Launchpad?

🔮 queenofstarz03 Follow

💀 Shut the fuck up right NOWWW!!

#STOP MENTIONING THAT FIC I WFOTE WHEN I WAS THIRTEEEN!!! #everything before my gay awakening is not canon. sorry #tbh... as much as a nightmare it was i kinda miss that stupid fic #it was from a simpler time #now im in university trying to contact my groupmates and i think one of them got lost in a blackhole last tuesday (again) #sigh. this keeps on happening to me #my cousin worked on one of the moons last summer for two weeks and came back like he'd aged six months #my friend's ex got sucked into a black hole and was briefly spaghettified but they managed to revive her and she gloats that she's finally taller than my friend's ex #whoops sorry for dumping in the notes #anyways. bad boy rk x good girl queen of hearts. awful idea. even more awful fic. yet i wrote it #i regret everything and nothing

25 notes

🗣️ peace-and-planets-deactivated63891092

PSA: Sunblr user @/summerheavens writes RPF of the Exterra 1 racers. She is a big name fan in the Miraculous Laserbug fandom so I thought you all would like to know. This is gross and disgusting behaviour and I implore you to stop.

🍬 summerheavens Follow

umm @/peace-and-planets i literally saw your kudos on my fic. the evidence is out there. girl what are YOU doing at the devil's sacrament. what are you doing on my roseduo rpf titled "hang your head low in the glow of the vending machine (we're not trying)".

but i'm glad you liked it enough to give it a kudos ^_^ will certainly be putting more on the starchive!

❄️ justwingit Follow

LMFAOOOO OP DEACTIVATEDDDDD 😭😭😭 sunblr user got killed by a rpf author. if you're gonna secretly read rpf maybe not leave a kudos?????

🚀 exterrablrheritage

Exterra 1 Heritage Post

⚡ littlewoodbabygirl69

It's been ten years since this post... @/summerheavens are you okay after recent developments

🍬 summerheavens Follow

am i okay? is ANYONE okay??? in these trying times??????? with the most chaotic gp to ever exist?????? i am PULLING OUT WIPS i dropped out of respect ten years ago. i've got to send my kid to daycare but once i'm done you bet you're seeing me on the starchive. miss swift even dropped her 20th album just in time for me to use lyrics as titles. i am LIVING and i am THRIVING

#ohhhhhhhhhh #let's go #also can't believe taylor finally addressed the vehicle manslaughter rumours from like twenty years ago #how fitting #also littlewood needs to get his shit together #why does he look like he's the one who hasn't seen his man in 32738102371 years and got his soul shattered #he's weak and won't survive the winter

27,408 notes

🧈 butteredbread Follow

WHAT is wrong with that lykos. i desire him carnally

🌳 treebark

@/handoftheking

🪓 handoftheking

I mean... yeah. Let's face it, we're all like that 🤷

⭐ nonbinarystar Follow

MR LITTLEWOOD WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE

#WHAT IS WRONG WITH HIM #I HATE HIM SO MUCH #PARASOCIAL RELATIONSHIPS CAN ALSO BE ABOUT HATE #THIS GLOWSTICK MF IS MY WORST ENEMY #he just canonised treebark for the sixth time #also prev tags so real #need to slingshot him into a faraway galaxy

34,091 notes

🫃 spaceshipmpreg Follow

Who put that Just a Dream FalseRen AMV on my dash again

🔮 queenofstarz03 Follow

Respect your roots!! That 125M views Just a Dream AMV raised a generation. Every kid in my school played it on loop on their ipods during recess

🔮 queenofstarz03 Follow

wait op can you explain your url

🫃 spaceshipmpreg Follow

No 👍

#i think we should get the dogwarts freighter pregnant

6 notes

[cauldron-burn-and-fire-bubble]

I WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT NINA!! anything you want to share about her, i want to collect

OOH OKAY ALRIGJT. (btw sorry this took a while i wrote up most of it days ago but The Tasks. you know how it is. here's a sketch for now)

so the thing about nina is that she is a really really old oc that i decided to revive over the summer to see what i could do with my current understanding of science and techmology so she doesn't really have an actual storyline. but here's some tidbits (under the cut because I have a lot to talk about). also warning for discussion of some unethical biomedical practices

- she's from kind of a cyberpunk dystopia where extreme human genetic alteration is possible (in embryos only ofc) but very very expensive because of not only the procedures needed to make an altered zygote but the resources required to incubate it for a full gestation period and because only some will end up viable the lab will have to create and incubate a carefully calculated number of embryos often with slight differences to ensure at least one will fully develop (this will be relevant i swear)

- so the technology is basically only available to the ultra rich

- nina was intended to have superficial birdlike features (think feathers instead of hair, high visual acuity, some minor skeletal alterations) but the lab done fucked up and she's much more bird than intended. im not an expert on emerging gene editing technology maybe the targeting sequences they used were a little off due to a glitch but you can see how she turned out

- the person who commissioned her didn't accept her and culling a fully developed altered human is well. murder. so she ended up in a care facility for rejected lab kids like herself

- she took way longer than a typical human child to start actually communicating when she talked but she was able to mimic words and phrases very very early. kind of creeped a lot of her caretakers out to greet her and hear their own slightly distorted voice repeat the greeting back from the mouth of a like two month old

- she eventually settled into her own voice but you could potentially identify the person who taught her some phrases if you knew them already. she's still a great mimic since she basically has a syrinx in there

- she struggles with verbal and written communication in general, a little better with body language at least for interpreting intentions/tone but different people can have very different body language ofc

- she also tends to be hyperactive (partly due to extremely high metabolism) and sort of impulsive

- incredible vision and spatial reasoning (those big bird eyes)

- technically with how large she is (about 4'3" if she could stand up straight without falling over and 70-80 lbs?) she shouldn't be able to fly but i ignore that

- remember how i said the duplicate embryos would be relevant well she has a secret not-quite twin another survivor from the same batch. idk how they got separated (remember i came up with the bones of this when i was like 10) but her twin had a messier life

- nina herself ended up as some kind of specialized government operative (cue booing) no she gets out of it in the end i swear

- the twin is a major figure in the conflict around rights for altered humans

- at some point the two of them meet and eventually join forces idk like i said there isn't a real story to this

- she has 2 fingers and the thumb free to move on each hand but they aren't very dextrous so she mainly uses her feet for fine motor tasks

- she also has difficulty emoting in a way that most humans can interpret due to the beak

- i have also made nina as a dnd character (her human parents gave her up to a monastery as an infant having frankly no idea what to do with her which she left as a teenager and became a highwayman as her appearance leads most potential benefactors to believe she's cursed) she has +5 dex and -1 con

and here's a little portrait for anyone who read this far. my beautiful daughter who i love so much <3

[ssreeder]

Hello! I was the anon who asked you what alta blogs I should follow like a week(?) ago. You said to come back to show you my fic so I wanted to ask for some advice. I've never really written anything before, and I have no idea at what point I should start posting it (ive written ~4 chapters now). Does posting while youre still writing motivate you to keep the story going? Part of me is worried it will just stress me out, part of me wants to get it out there already so im not the only one who knows it exists! How long should it take to write a chapter? How frequently is it reasonable to post updates? I have no idea what im doing. Any pro tips?

OLLO!

So nice to officially meet you! There are so many more seasoned and advanced writers out there that might offer you better pro-tips, but I will help you where I can, so thank you for reaching out!!

WOW! You have 4 chapters written?! That’s amazing!

My biggest PRO-TIP is to please, please, please – HAVE FUN!!!! The point of writing fanfiction is to enjoy yourself. I truly believe writing for fun should be a no pressure, creative outlet for people to explore their mind and flex their wonderful imagination!

I’ll try to answer the questions you sent me.

Does posting while I am writing motivate me to keep going?

YES!!! I have actually never even contemplated writing the entire story and then posting it chapter by chapter… It does seem like a rather efficient way to do it though, lol. I do have my very first WIP that is 4 chapters along and I know I will never post it because I decided to go in a different direction and write something else… So if you think you might lose momentum by keeping it all for yourself then please, post it! (Just space out your updates)

How often should you update?

Correct answer? Whenever the fuck you want.

I personally like to post my updates every 2ish weeks (I think every WEEK is the shortest time I would go between updates) but sometimes they pop up sooner and sometimes they take WAY longer lol. This is why Tumblr is great because I can update people how the chapter is coming along and I don’t mind if people ask me when the next update will come (I love the attention and I NEED IT!)

How long does it take me to write a chapter?

Depends… I am an unusually fast writer. I have a system that I have created for myself that works, but I am a human being and I have a life outside of my fanfiction and sometimes things happen in it that takes time away from writing. Sometimes I just don’t FEEL like writing right now, or sometimes I am stuck at a spot and I need a fresh day or a new environment to get through it.

The important thing is to enjoy your life and not let yourself get stressed thinking that you should be writing, or you should be updating your story��. No. You SHOULD be enjoying your damn self. <3

Different chapter lengths will take different amount of time…. I do not know how to write a chapter under 8k…. I just can’t & most of my chapters hit from 10k-13k and it takes me 2 weeks to write, edit and post. But everyone is different and it might take you a month to write a 3k chapter and that is O K A Y!!!

However long it takes you to write a chapter is how long you should space your updates even if you have the heads start. So if it takes you a month to write a chapter (no matter how many words it is) then do your updates once a month. It just makes it easy.

OKAY.... Here is my MOST IMPORTANT PRO-TIP……

Please try not to play the comparison game! It is the most dangerous game you can play with your writing. So my BIGGEST advice is to not compare what you wrote to what anyone else has written. Kudos, comments, collections, all the crap is great but what is really important is that you are enjoying what you are writing and you are having fun. No everyone is going to read your story and that is OK!

If writing ever became stressful for me and I wanted to stop, I would. (Nervous laugh to the two people I came to in the middle of the night screaming I QUIT!!! & they talked me off the deleting ledge, THANK THEM THAT LIAB STILL EXISTS lol)

If writing ever becomes a thing in your life that stresses you out or makes you feel upset about yourself then TAKE A BREAK! OR QUIT! This is your life and you being happy is the number one thing.

It does help to have someone, ANYONE that you can talk to about your complaints or frustrations (it is just nice to have someone to talk to and vent about things – or bounce ideas off of…. Or beg for them to design your characters outfits because you just can’t dress yourself, much less the fictional characters)

Final TIP!:

The only other advice I have is if people comment on your writing, comment back! I am probably TOO engaged with my readers haha… but it is one of my FAVORITE parts about writing fanfiction. I love to get comments like “I NEVER COMMENT BUT AHHHH!!!!” & I take my time to respond to each one individually. So if reader interaction is important to you, then make sure you participate with your readers and make them feel special and appreciated.... because they deserve it. (I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!!!)

(I would seriously write my stories JUST for the few people that comment and tell me that my words touched them somehow and they felt things from reading. I can think of specific usernames that made me go AWWWWWW... worth it.)

Well…. That is my rambling answer. I hoped it helped? If you need anything else feel free to DM me and I will try to assist you in anyway I can!! <3 Have a wonderful day! I am excited for you!!!!!

[literaphobe]

okay i’ll bite. what is mcyt and dream smp. like i know what they stand for but what exactly... is it.... is it actually good or just your latest hyperfixation AGSHJSJSKS

oh god beware this is long and also i technically wrote it as part of a tangent to another ask but i realized this response suited this question much better but it also makes references to that ask which i will answer right after this one

“what is minecraft youtube?” well any YouTube video that features minecraft is technically minecraft youtube. i specifically only care about like. dream + friends. i follow the ‘feral boys’ (dream george quackity sapnap karl) mostly? but if ur question is: what is dream known for? the answer is minecraft manhunt and dream smp

so what’s minecraft manhunt? to understand that, u need to understand that minecraft isn’t “just blocks” because it is a beatable game haha. u beat the game by killing the ender dragon and obviously there’s a lot of stuff u need to do to do that. but i won’t bore u w the details. “speedrunning minecraft” means u beat minecraft very fast. dream used to be the record holder for beating minecraft a few months ago. he no longer is but i won’t get into that. it’s an annoying discussion n literally no one cares. all i’ll say is if u really believe he cheated and that he wasn’t being targeted by people who have since been exposed for trying to frame him for saying slurs that he never said (amongst other stuff), then u literally hate neurodivergent people so much. that’s all!

so what is MANHUNT, specifically? basically, dream does a series where x number of people are HUNTING him down and trying to KILL him before he beats the game. if he dies even ONCE, he loses. he’s done this with one hunter (george), two (+sapnap), three (+badboyhalo), four (+antfrost), and now five hunters (+awesamdude)

the hunters have infinite lives, and a compass that leads them to where dream is at any given point in the game. dream is allowed to kill them as many times as he wants, as a form of self preservation

so what’s the allure to manhunt? essentially, it’s how dream plays the game. he’s incredibly skilled at pvp (fighting) and parkour (moving fast and agile that i can’t even begin to explain. u need to see this for urself. it’s even more impressive if u play the game) and “clutching” (how he saves himself from risky moves and all the absolutely CREATIVE ways he does it)

also all the traps he sets to kill the hunters since it’s hard to go up against multiple people no matter how good you are. and how QUICKLY he thinks. it’s amazing. people with adhd are amazing and dream is a PRIME example of that. it makes me less hateful of my adhd :) and more appreciative of my traits :)

how did he do this? lots of research, lots of practice, lots of training. dream used to be a really average minecraft player who had to beg GEORGE to go easy on him. now? george loses to dream even on 40/50 hearts (the usual is 10). dream poured his heart into making his videos, putting a creative spin and skillful spin to his content that had never really been seen/executed as well before. and so 1.5 years after he started actively making YouTube videos he has over 20 million subscribers. and I’m not kidding, that number could be 30 million in a few months from now. that’s how fast he’s growing

ok i got off topic. another great thing about manhunt is dream’s relationship w the HUNTERS. the hunters are friends who dream has known for many years, and also they come up with great plans to defeat him as well. in many ways, they can also be seen as the “underdogs” in manhunt, especially since dream won the 4 hunters series 3-2. anyway in manhunt, all of the players are in an open channel discord voice chat, so they can all hear each other talk, and also talk to each other. sometimes the hunters discuss strategies before the face off, or they dm ideas secretly in the game chat, or attempt to talk in code. but mostly dream can hear the things they say, and they can hear the things he says. it makes it so that they can attempt to trick each other, but they can also hear things that give them a leg up in the game. etc etc. the banter that goes on is like. BIG part of what makes manhunt fun to watch

and the editing...... it is very good and engaging n he chooses fun music :) the speedrun music is a meme by now but it still slaps unironically. he makes excellent choices n i am very entertained

OKAY. so what is dream smp?

(smp stands for Survival Multiplayer. aka: a lot of people play together in a world where u can die and monsters spawn. the dream part is because dream owns the server)

once upon a time, there were two best friends. their names were dream and george. they decided to play minecraft survival together, but they didn’t want to beat the game super fast this time. THIS was about having fun. they wanted to casually explore the world, build a house together, raise some animals, start a farm, etc! after a bit they started to add some of their other friends so more people could have fun with them. and then more people got added. and the dream smp started to include a roleplay aspect because they invited people who did roleplay on other servers

i won’t summarize the events for u. if u wanna know what HAPPENED plot wise, this dude evanmcgaming makes like. summaries that are low key documentaries. very well made, he includes clips from the actual lore streams when necessary! his channel is here and i’ll list the documentaries in order: first | second | third | fourth | fifth

and then this really cool 18 year old Filipino girl started animating events on the dream smp to look REALLY cool n it got so many views and her first animation was done on her PHONE w her FINGER and it made the people on dream smp go damn we need to step the FUCK up so that this girl can get better material for her animations. they are all huge fans of her. everyone is a huge fan of her. she’s called sad-ist, and so far there are 4 main animations: first | second | third | fourth

anyway now! dream smp is essentially what i would call gay planned theatre improv but the medium through which they perform is not a stage but on minecraft. there actually is WRITING involved in this, they script the series of events etc, but for the most part they don’t actively script dialogue afaik?

some truly AMAZING bits of dialogue has come out of the dream smp. the dream smp is basically. gamers transform into theatre kids before ur very eyes + some of these bitches WERE theatre kids and they’re showing it now!

it’s amazing watching the growth because a lot of them have improved leaps and bounds. one of the most notable improved actors is dream ❤️  yea im bringing him up ok because im RIGHT his acting used to just be him screaming but now he can give me chills. he’s very good n is the “main villain” on dream smp :)

and like. not only do we have people like sad-ist animating the smp we have members like quackity who include pre recorded elements in his lore streams to make it just. a truly incredible experience. quackity my beloved. i love him so much

[shoezuki]

This is a post on the cheating accusations around dream mostly surrounding his response video.

If you don’t want to see this or any of these posts then blacklist the tag #discourse

SO I’ve been doing a lot of digging into what dream has said in his response to Geosquare’s original video and report, which was compiled and conducted by the Minecraft Java mods on speedrun.com. 

I won’t talk about that original report in detail, but basically: the mods came to the conclusion that Dream had a 1 in 7.5 trillion chance of getting the pearl bartering rates and the blaze drop odds that he did within the 6 streams he did. As in, someone would need that luck to replicate what dream got. Therefore, he cheated. 

I’m going to put this into a sort of ‘point form’ in according to topic, attempting to put it in chronological order.

Dream’s Initial Tweets

Ok so first like. these are bad. these tweets are what he said (on twitter, excluding in the speedrunning discord) directly after the video was Uploaded to Geo’s channel. 

worth noting he did apologize later, although i wanted to talk about these two instances so i felt the need to include it. 

there’s a lot of interesting wording in the apology tweet itself too. I personally find that when he apologizes he tends to still be very subtextually angry in them with the tone, but more specifically. where he says ‘although i have reason to be upset’, that’s kinda weak and really unneeded. Alongside the ‘intense criticism’, it reads as him trying to say he’s still in the right. kind of like “im sorry i was rude even though I had reason to be rude’. Its an apology sure but he’s not saying sorry for how he really reacted; its justified to him.

Dream’s Response Video

Dream posted a response on his side channel DreamXD on the 22nd, along with the report he had a supposed astrophysicist conduct. I’m going to talk about the report separately from the video for reasons I’ll explain. 

Frankly, the video doesn’t really summarize or explain the report in a meaningful way. At most, it takes some points from it but tends to twist the numbers around, misunderstand the probability and math, and also what the report itself concludes. 

Essentially, dream’s video insists that the numbers found by the mods are wrong and therefore he didn’t cheat at all, yet the report concludes that the numbers found by the mods weren’t entirely accurate, however they’re still extremely unlikely. This is also all under the assumption that the report is entirely correct (ill say how its not next)

His first point is that only his 1.16 run (that was at 5th place two months ago, would have now been 16th) was deemed cheated. This is true; the mods have said that he isnt banned outright and theres no reason to question the legitimacy of his 1.15 runs. 

He also concludes that Geo’s statement that Dream didn’t cooperate with them, and that he deleted 1.16 mod folders, was false. This one is a little more complicated. It could more be chalked up to a miscommunication, although it’s relevant. Geosquare posted screenshots of the specific conversation they had:

Essentially it wasn’t entirely clear, i can understand how geo and the mods interpreted it in such a way. Altho April added in a quote retweet thread that dream didn’t supply the folder she asked for, so he didn’t supply everything they asked for like he states in the video

Essentially: yeah, misleading and weird on both ends. I dont think this is really anything quantifiable, although dream talked about this in the video heavily. 

Out of this though, Geo DID correct himself in the description of the mods’ video. Dream shows this in his own response, but it crops out some of what geo says. here’s from dream’s video

that Update 2 is where he corrects himself. literally why the fuck would you crop it like this and put it in the video i mean this looks so weird and genuinely doesnt provide anything. Here’s what geo actually said

Dream specifically cut it before the line where geo mentions how he said he deleted his specific 1.16 speedrun profile. This one is just so dumb to me. I’d say ‘why not include that’ but either i feel its a) so there’s no potential for people to say what he had actually said could be interpreted otherwise easily or b) doesnt want people to know he got so upset he deleted files (ego wise yknow). Again, I dont think this is definitive of anything but god. it feels scummy lmao

The Video: Incorrect Representation of His Own Report

Dream straight up doesnt present the report’s numbers properly. In fact it makes the entirety of his visuals forfeit, i.e. the gold block analogy that goes on for like 20 minutes. 

The mods said his luck was 1/7.5 trillion. Dream’s report says its 1/10 million (with the addition of 5 other streams) or 1/100 million (only the 6 streams).

I’ll only consider the 1/10 mil odds, since its all dream really brings up. but Basically; there’s not much difference between 1/10 million and 1/7.5 trillion. 

Dream says that the difference is 7.5 trillion minus 10 million, aka 7.4999 trillion. This is what his entire visual with the gold blocks is based on. This is absolutely incorrect, i cant stress that enough. 

You can’t find the difference of fractions by subtracting only the denominators. Like. this is elementary school math. it just doesnt work. 

It’d actually be calculated as: (1/10 000 000) - (1/7 500 000 000 000) = (74999/7 500 000 000 000)

If the mods are wrong, they’re only wrong by 749999/7.5 trillion. that’s literally only  0.000000099999866666667. 

Dream no doubt saw the numbers, considered 10 million vs. 7.5 trillion, and used these big numbers to hold his own point. PROBABILITY DOESNT WORK LIKE THAT. I really think he was just taking advantage of the seemingly big numbers here and wrote it out in a way that favoured him. The gold block analogy in the video played throughout the entire video practically, jokes were made on it, and he made a point of it being ‘so big the game crashed’. 

It’s just plain wrong. even so a difference in the odds doesnt prove shit. He’s downplaying his own odds that he found too. 1/10 million isnt a small number. Even though the legitimacy of that calculation is in question, it is still significant enough to proclaim he cheated. 

Some quick points before I move onto the report; these aren’t as significant in my eyes but it adds to the picture

there’s been criticism of his joking manor throughout the entire video, very specifically the Bill Nye joke. Considering he doesnt actually have a name to provide for his astrophysicist, this joke doesnt feel right

the mod he had a voice clip from (willz) even believes that he cheated and has agreed with the mod team the whole time. 

Dream never has a name for the mod who is apparently on his side (more understandable), the minecraft developer he quoted, or the astrophysicist (most damning)

Dream states that fabric is used by most speedrunners which is true, but fabric and fabric API are different; dream also had the latter installed. my knowledge of how theyre different is limited, all i really know is the API is what can enable editing of the code while fabric is more a modloader. im not entirely sure on this

Dream has said at the end of the video that all funds will go to the mod team so they can make a client that will regulate cheaters. this has been noted as feeling manipulative or like a ‘bribe’, but it definitely puts the mods in a bad position. 

either they accept it and look like they ‘gave in’ to dream and therefore acknowledge him in the right

they deny it and look selfish/taking dream’s kindness for granted

geo said they would insist it goes to a charity instead

Dream constantly disregards the mods as young, inexperienced, ‘just volunteers’ etcetcetc, despite the fact that theyre analysis has been discussed by people with confirmed PhDs without much criticism

Dream’s Report

The report itself is extremely interesting, in that it’s very questionable, but even so it doesn’t come to the conclusion that dream didn’t cheat. The tone between the video and the report is drastically different. 

This is from the “3. What are the goals of this document?” section:

It essentially says this isnt intended, from the very beginning, to completely exonerate dream of cheating. Also note that the author says the mods’ report was mostly correct. 

This is at the end of “9 Conclussions”:

It does notably say cheating isnt the only explanation, but it doesnt actually go as far to say that it’s not possible that he cheated. 

But this can be argued to not matter if we consider the validity of the report as a whole

Dream’s Report: Criticisms

Possibly the first and most known debunking of the report is by u/mfb on reddit, although there’s been much more such as this programmer criticizing the code provided at the end of the report (partially due to how the author of it stated that piglins barter 4-7 pearls, which is incorrect: it’s 4-8), Andrew Gelman, an actual statistician professor from harvard, commented on the original mods’ report as ‘impressive’ while Dream’s report is being regarded as something funny in the comments, and even analysis of dream’s behaviours and his argument by a law student

But what u/mfb posted is what i’ll focus on. Some background into the user; he’s a particle physicist, is moderator in subreddits like r/cosmology and r/astrophysics, he’s regarded as a reliable source on r/askscience and r/askreddit. Basically, multiple other people have vouched for him and before all this he had many posts in these fields. 

that’s already better than the unnamed astrophysicist. 

The post is better speaking for itself but here is a few exerpts from it;

Essentially, the report’s methods are debunked by u/mfb-, alongside that a moderator of r/statistics regarded the report as ‘nonsensical in its application of statistics’ and linked to u/mfb-’s comment. 

i’m going to end this here. Partially because severe backpain or whatever,.

but I want to say at this point its practically definitive that dream cheated, that he lied to us, and that he continues to do so. Much more could be said on his video such as his tone, intentions, the overt emphasis on the ‘biases’ of the mods. 

I havent even mentioned that the ‘astrophysicist’ themself may be a scam; they are sourced from a website that is extremely sketchy, has no names attached to it, and was created less than a year ago (with practically no traffic on it until maybe a month ago). 

But i hope this is coherent. I have interest in this so if theres questions im always open. 

[sugarkinky]

Gamers gotta game

Pairing: Gamer!jungkook x Nerd!Reader x Fuckboy!Jimin Genre: Future smut, fluff and angst (the holy package). Warnings: None in this part, actually.

A/N: This is my very first fic posted on here, please give me any kind of feedback you feel I might need. Not edited v. 

1 | 2

*gif not mine*

PART 1

▪♡▪

7:34 am

You was almost late when you jumped out of bed and made it to the bathroom, your first class starts at 8:15 and you still had to walk for 20 minutes to get there. This left you with an empty stomach and a lack of caffeine for the rest of the morning, the class itself wasn't bad but you couldn't pay much attention to Mr. Patrick talking about some impossible function. After what felt like days, you were finally lunching with your friends on the cafeteria.

"Y/N, how could you forget my skirt?" Kenny said with her puppy eyes. You promised her you would borrow her some clothes that your mom insisted on buying for the sake of you "going out more".

"Sorry K, can't you pick it up tomorrow?" Your month were already full of sandwich.

"I guess it will do... Are you sure you won't come tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I'm not the frat party type, you know it" And specifically not this one, the Beta Tau Sigma were a fucking no-no for you after your first party with them on freshmen year. This guys are just crazy and loud as fuck.

Since it was a Friday, you made plans to watch some documentaries and order pizza with some wine. It was just perfect. 

Well, almost perfect if it wasn’t for the hungover from the cheap wine the day after. This was a typical Saturday afternoon, Kenny knocked at your door to hang out with you and you guys chatted about school stuff and about her crush that is supposed to be at the party. 

“What if he is already with other random girl and I don’t even know?” You stared at Kenny’s eyes with a scowl in your face. 

“What makes you think like that?”

“I don’t know, Jin is a very popular guy and older than us, from what I know he has no reason to tell me the truth.”

“So he has no reason to lie to you as well, dummy.”

And the afternoon passed like that, Kenny was already at the door when you shout to her:

“Get home safe bitch!“

“And you stay safe in yours sweetheart!“

▪♡▪

(1:23)Kbae: bich, wasuuuuupp

The sudden noise scared you but you got up from the couch to go catch your phone in the kitchen table. 

(1:24)You: Are you ok?

Kbae: I thik I lost m cell 

You: No, you didn’t

It was a little late for you to deal with drunk Kenny but a side of you were worried that she wasn’t home yet.

You: Where are you?

Kbae: Im los at the bathroom 

You: Your bathroom?

Kbae: nooo im PRTYING LOL

Ok, now you are officially worried she’s going to get her head in the toilet at any moment.

You: Is anyone with you??

Kbae: no that bitc left m

So you remembered that Lisa, Kenny’s friend was there. You try to reach her with no success. You can’t believe she’s getting you out of the comfort of your couch because of her low alcohol tolerance, that dumb bitch…

You: Don’t move a single bone, I’m coming and you will pay me for this later.

The uber was almost there when you received the reply.

(1:50)Kbae: bt I hve no mony

The BTS house wasn´t that far from your place, but it was enough time for you to start regretting your decision. The single thought of a place full of people and loud noise was making you really anxious. When the Uber arrived you took at least 5 minutes getting out of the car, you knew something bad was going to happen with the bad luck you had.

The entrance had just two guys that, from what you guess, should be the security or something like that. You go straight to the door but you fail on not getting attention from the two.

“Hey, do we know you?” The blond guy ask you just when you were getting in.

“Probably not, I’m not the party type. Just here to pick up my friend.”

The blond guy look to the other that seem a little waisted.

“Yeah? What’s her name?” The waisted one shout at you.

“Kenny.”

They look at each other with a little surprise and the blond one say:

“The last time I saw her she was upstairs, are you sure she asked you here?”

“Hyung, let her in, I know her.” The voice comes from inside and you recognize it from your Contemporary Literature class, It’s Namjoon. You never thought he was into frat parties…

“Hi Y/N, I’m sorry for Yoongi and Hoseok here. They are just making sure you aren’t someone from a rival frat or something.” I laugh at the thought of it.

“It’s okay, have you seen Kenny?” You say as a proof of what he’s saying, Namjoon and Kenny are in the same major and maybe he would know where her dumb ass is.

“Not really”

When you get upstairs looking for her you see something you were afraid of seeing, but you know it was inevitable since it was a BTS party. Your ex, well not really an ex since you never had an actual relationship – what actually made the things worse. Jimin was a typical fuckboy but a smartass one for your bad luck, he was almost better than you in your classes and sweet with you. You didn’t know his fame back then and that led into you falling for someone who just saw you as a fuckbuddy. Since you never told him your real feelings, he never knew the reason for your sudden distance, he probably thought you got tired of him and with time he didn’t reach you anymore. And for it not being awkward, you made sure you didn’t took any classes with him this semester.

There you were standing in front of him kissing someone against the wall, you were just frozen in place when you remembered why you was there: Kenny. You almost run to a corridor that had a door with “WC” wrote on it.

But Kenny wasn’t there, actually there was another couple making out, which made you blush and say a lot of apologies after you saw the face of the guy: Jin. You closed the door and rested at a nearest wall, this night is getting worse and worse.

Ok, just breathe. If she’s not there, where?

You started calling her but she stopped answering you since you got there. You tried Lisa but with no success. So you decided to look downstairs but just when you’re reaching the stairs you collided with someone and thanks to your bad luck it was Jimin, of course.

“Y/N?”

“Hum… Hi.”  

“What are you doing here?”

“Kenny.”

“Oh, she made you come.”

“Yeah, you can say that.”

“Well, do you want some vodka? I know you’re not a big fan of beer.”

“Actually someone is waiting for me, sorry have to go” And you run to the closest door praying for it to be open and for the first time that night things worked out and you got no problem getting in. There was a guy in a computer in the room it took him just a few seconds to notice you.

“Hey! Don’t you know how to read? There is a sign at door saying DO NOT ENTER THIS ROOM you…” and the man sited before you turned his chair to see you.

“I’m sorry, can I hide here for a little?” He was shocked to see that you weren’t, first thing, trying to find a spot to make out – since you were alone – and second, drunk.

With a sad smile he said “Some weirdo is following you?”

I felt bad for lying but it was almost it wasn’t it?

“Yeah…”

“No problem, you can lay on the bed for a while.”

The room was not that big but it had two single beds and a study space with the most expensive-looking computer you’ve ever seen. When you sat on the bed, the guy returned to do something on the pc and put his headphones on again. When you got to see what he was doing you notice he was playing some game, who plays games on a party? Weird. Not that you were in a less awkward position.

“HYUNG, can’t you see the MAP?”

You were startled with the sudden shout and nearly jumped on the bed, then he turned to you and said:

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to scare you.”

You just nodded and he returned to talk with someone on the game. So you remembered about the Kenny matter, where did this bitch went? You got your phone and text her like crazy, called Lisa and finally you got an idea: her roommate. You call Jisoo and she picks up rather quickly.

“Hello?” Her voice seemed a little sleepy, you must had woke her up.

“Hi, it’s Y/N. I’m sorry for waking you up but I’m trying to find Kenny. Did she go home?”

“Oh, yeah. She arrived here about 20 minutes ago, super wasted and crying. Did something happen?”

Oh, no. Seokjin.

“I don’t really know, but thanks for answering me this late.”

“It’s nothing, any time.”

“Well, good night.”

“Good night.”

Finally, the nightmare is over. Well not really over, you have to get out of this hell before that. So, you get up and go to the door, not really wanting to bother the man on his game. But he heard your steps and turned to you.

“Are you going?”

“Yeah, I’ll try to get home.” And you go back to your way.

“Wait.”

You look at him and he seems a little self-conscious with what he has to say.

“I can take you to the door so you won’t get into trouble with the guy again.” He says that with a hand on the back of his neck. You feel bad for telling him a lie and make him worry about you, he seems nice.

“Ahm, I don’t think its that of a big deal. I don’t want to bother you any more that I already had.”

“It’s no trouble at all, actually I had delivered food and it should be in the way right now.”

“Okay then.” And you two go downstairs to reach the door as you’re praying you won’t see Jimin in the way there. When you got in the balcony you called an Uber and a strange silence got to the both of you.

“Ah.. I didn’t actually got your name.”

“It’s Jungkook, and yours?”

“I’m Y/N, thanks for letting me hide on your room.”

“Oh, it’s nothing.”

And the silence came again…

“Ahm… Is it your first party here? I don’t remember you from before.”

“Well, I’m not much of a party goer kind of girl.” He laugh at that and your face turned into a frown.

“I’m not laughing at you, I don’t like parties that much too as you could see.” You smile at that, yeah playing games wasn’t much of a party activity.

“Why do you live on a frat then?”

“That’s what I ask myself every day.”

That’s when your car arrived and both of you said your goodbyes.

(3:36) Jimin: Hey, missed seeing you.

 A/N: Thanks for reading, I’ll try to do part two if this one succeed. Send me a message I’d love that.  

[fullwets]

shoeydaniel's top works of 2020 ❤️

I was tagged by my dearest darling @captainfuu like . two entire months ago. and by the literal MVP of this hellsite, @eight-hearts, today 🙈 thank you both so much!

i’ll tag @pierreswrists @pierrelli @jeeperslatifi @estebanoconz bc i am a massive fan of all of ur work. only if you want to! grrrr i was gonna tag everyone first but then i procrastinated and now everyone’s done it already

Rules: It’s time to love yourself. Choose your 5 favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you’ve brought into the world. Tag as many writers/artist/etc. you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works! 

5. over the last ~14 months or so I’ve started drawing again!! Literally while procrastinating for finals I drew Harry Styles in the margins of my class reading and was like “oh shit i can draw?” The rest is history. I am going to cheat and include multiple drawings as one entry on this list kjhdksjhd. Here’s my F1-related sketch dump

4. in the same vein - here’s another, non-f1 sketch dump

side note: I have nicknamed this era of my drawings “The PearsonVUE.com/Military Collection” bc i was trying to use up a stack of branded post-its from my dad’s old employer 💀 rip pearsonvue postits. im so glad we finally ran out bc there were like 500 of those bitches.

3. all my heart finds true

long story short @pierreswrists wrote something in the tags of a reblog that inspired me, and I said we should turn it into a fic together, so we wrote a fic about love letters and crossing an ocean to be with someone you love, and then I had to take a break from writing said fic bc I was falling for her and i didn’t want to associate us with maxiel, and here we are four months later, in a relationship. It’s embarrassing. Anyway. I’m proud of what we made! And it was very very cool to create something collaboratively.

2. yellow, yellow, gold, and ochre

My precious, precious, horror fic! I call this one “savior pierre” in my head, and it was entirely inspired by the events of Monza 2020, and it’s gen (yay for being a Normal Human Being), and it made N compliment me and now we’re friends!!!! Eeeee! Writing horror was actually very fun and I hope I do it again some day.

1. Heels turned black

despite the fact that i no longer produce maxiel in any form, i am still SO fucking proud of this fic. I made friends through this, I entered the F1 fandom through this, and most importantly, it’s my favorite piece of writing I’ve ever completed. I love the way I wrote it, I was blown away by the response people had, it felt so satisfying to complete. I don’t think there’s much else to say. J once made a post about how much she loved it that I still have saved in my drafts to this day. L left me not one but several essay-length comments filled with red-gold emoji that made me gasp when i received them. S read it immediately after she was released from the hospital and now we’re girlfriends. htb really truly is the culmination of my year.

[cockbiteproductions]

all prime numbers in the Misc section and all multiples of 10 in the other sections

we shall go backwards as the question list was posted backwards...... (and also why i rbed it.... why is it backwards? i dont know but i love it. edit: now that ive seen question 1 it looks to me like one of those forum profile copy pastes where you fill out the entire thing and put it in your profile.)

200: My crush’s name is: hmm...... well. i would rather not say!!!! they could see this post!!!!!!! and we do not want that happening.......

190: My 1st job was: lifeguard in the summer after 9th or 10th grade i think? it was decently fun. i grew up swimming competitively so the swimming part was a breeze. the remembering what to do if someone is drowning part? a bit harder. memory bad. what to do if someone has a potential broken spine/head injury when they’re in deep water? i don’t know bud. but it involves 3 whole people to get them out. 2 in the water, one person at all times holding their head in line with the rest of their body, the other one strapping them to the board (these two people in the water switch off, too) and then one person standing on the side of the pool looking very concerned. also don’t tell anyone but sometimes if i had like a 6 am shift i would get really groggy and almost fall asleep on the stand.

180: Marriage is: whatever people make of it but unfortunately bogged down with like a lot of societal expectations. to me it just sounds like hanging with your “best” friend until you die but a lot of other people interpret it differently.

170: What did you do yesterday? LOL wouldn’t it be nice if i remembered. wait no i do remember. i woke up “early” and watched a dnd livestream and struggled through buffering from my shit wifi. then i took a nap. then i had a chipotle burrito that was way too spicy. and i played a lot of minecraft. and i wrote a bit. and i also did like another 2-3 pages of the codecademy html intro course im working on.

160: Soul mates: nope. [taylor mason voice] i don’t believe in the concept of a soul. you are compatible with some people more than others and that’s based on your values and interests and personality. nothing Soul about it. it’s fun in fanfic and fiction though, but that’s because it’s fiction.

150: Blondes or Brunettes: brunettes..... i like brown hair! but blonde is nice too.

140: Mac or PC: clown face emoji. mac. It’s A Unix System. more convenient for me. my current mac is a giant piece of shit though. though i think that’s my own fault for keeping all my old files from my old mac. shoulda started over. i think i might try to get this one factory reset or something.

130: Wal-Mart or Target: idk walmart. i go there a lot during college. walmart just has a larger selection. i used to go to target a lot as a kid though because my mom liked it more. i think it’s like slightly more bougie?

120: Gay Marriage: fuckin go for it pals. sad that it took as long as it did to become legal.

110: My Neighbors: they are nice i think. the ones to the right are teachers or something. the ones to the left are.... idk. their kids were like maybe 5 years older than me and my brother when we were growing up though and sometimes they would indulge in us tiny annoying kids and hang with us

100: Cried in front of someone: when the finale of the clone wars came out a few months ago and i was sobbing and i ran into the living room to tell my roommate and friend that i was sobbing. i was sobbing. i also recorded myself watching the entire eps and i Sure Was Sobbing.

90: Texted: actual sms text, yesterday in response to a friend who texted me a tik tok. instant messaging like 20 minutes ago to milo. i havent responded yet because im answering this and i cant multitask for shit.

89: Who makes you laugh the most: me obviously. i think i’m fucking hilarious. me aside, @redvsblue​ is the funniest person on this planet. also my friend holly irl who shares my incredibly dumb sense of humor. also you!

83: The most difficult thing to do is: hmm........ in general or for me personally? idk..... a lot? i am not a very courageous person. so i guess being brave.

79: First time you had a crush: >:( not appreciating this line of questioning that lines up with the prime numbers/mult of 10. i will not be saying as they ALSO follow me on tumblr. though they don’t use it often. shout out to middle school.......

73: Tomorrow: hopefully wake up around 1 pm at the latest. make a plum smoothie. play some more minecraft and get more netherite (new update slaps). do more coding tutorials. get some writing done. the same ol same ol.

71: Next Summer: hopefully i will have a job lined up for the fall and the pandemic is Over. i would like to just [do nothing] for the last summer Ever before job starts. if i don’t have a job then it’s Job Hunting Time.

67: The person that makes me cry the most is: what the fuck...... like in a bad way? good way? cry of laughter? sadness? me, probably. my own damn brain be like “well it’s time to think about Yourself and be sad!” i know. very narcissistic of me. also dave filoni (director, producer, writer on clone wars).

61: My Car: not really mine. i just use it. beige 201? toyota camery. my brother tried to convince my dad he needed it more than i did last school year. my brother, who lived on campus in boston and flies to school from nc when he goes there, needs the car more than me, who lived off campus and drove to and from school to get back to nc, thinks he needed the car more than me. what a guy.

59: The movie I cried at was: last movie huh......... when was the last time i saw a movie? idk probably the rise of skywalker when leia died. i don’t know. i sure as hell didn’t cry at cats.

53: How do you like your steak cooked: i am vegetarian.

47: Who’s your best friend: @worthyghouls​ i guess. but also concept of “best friend” is so weird. No Best Friends. just lots of people i am good friends with. feels weird to all my other friends to pick One of them and be like “well i like you more than everyone else” :)

43: Do you have a 5 year plan: only in the vaguest vaguest vaguest sense. i would like to graduate with my bs degree. i would like to live in a city (doesn’t have to be a super big one. where im at rn is fine). i would like to have my first or second job i feel comfortable doing related to the degree i am getting. i would like to live in my own apartment (with roommates)/not with my parents. i would like to not be rent burdened. i would like my roommate to know how to take care of a cat or be okay with helping me learn how to take care of one. i would like to have a cat with said roommate. and that’s about it tbh. not very ambitious, i know. i just want a simple life......

41: Have you pre-named your children: bold of you to assume i will have children. no. if i ended up with child it would be like that tag on ao3 called “accidental baby acquisition” and i would name it on the spot.

30: Actress: hmm..... lauren marcus. lauren lopez. does fiona nova count if she’s going to be in rvb zero? also lindsay jones. aubrey plaza. idk. not many actresses i follow from project to project. it’s more i will see them in something and appreciate them in that role immensely. 

20: Holiday: halloween is pretty chill. just getting candy from strangers? dope. scary aesthetic? amazing. i also like christmas just for the sole fact that i get time off from [life].

10: Restaurant: a favorite restaurant??? who has one of those???? i sure don’t. and i’m not gonna say something cringey like olive garden or mcdonalds. i simply do not have one.

[ilguna]

hi- I’m not sure if you’re the right person to ask, but I wanted to know how to start a fanfic writing tumblr- I mean, I’m just not sure how to start since I’ve never posted anything on my account- I’m sorry if this is an inconvenience-

Don’t worry about it. I’m a little offended that you would think you’re coming to the wrong place 😂.

Imma break it down for you.

BTW this post is long bc I wanted to cover all bases

—

First of all, if you’re on tumblr mobile, then that’s fantastic and we’ll start with that first. If you’re on desktop, I would like to suggest getting it on your phone because it’s more accessible and easier to manage than doing it on the computer. The only time I go to the computer is when I’m going to post fics, but we’ll get there.

I know you said you’re wondering how to start posting fics but I gotta give you some advice before that. Because there are just some things I cannot stand when it comes to some fanfic blogs, alright?

Be easy on your color scheme. I wouldn’t put any bright colors because it could hurt someone’s eyes, and sometimes it looks really bad. Going along with that, you should be careful what your second color is on your blog (let’s say that your base color was a maroon, and then you’d choose a color similar to that/darker than that. It’ll be hard to read the things in your bio, and it’s frustrating)

This is obvious, but make sure you have a profile and header picture, it’s more appealing rather than tumblrs default.

Turn ON asks and then proceed to do it for anonymous questions, because that’s the only way you get requests. Some people do it off anon but that’s not as common.

You can do this on desktop and a safari browser. It’s not possible to do on mobile just yet. Open up safari > log in > little person icon in the top right > edit appearance. Scroll until you see “let people as questions” turn that on. Turn on anon, and edit the box to whatever you want. Keep it short

Turn off “share posts you like” and the following one below it. It’s a risky game to play when it comes to what you’re looking at and liking.

No submission posts, normally people don’t submit things anyway. Turn OFF “on blog advertising” and then that’s it. It automatically saves so you can just leave to the next screen imma bout to tell you about

IF you go to my blog on desktop, you’ll see that there’s a theme. My font is different, I have a different set up than most blogs, etc.

If you wanna mess around with that, scroll to the top of page (you should still be on the same page from the anon instructions) and tap “edit theme”

It might take a second to load, but you’ll get there.

THIS SCREEN IS VERY IMPORTANT.

Besides the fact that it lets you edit your theme, this is how you put in a Masterlist, and all other links you might want in your bio.

You said you haven’t written anything yet, so there isn’t a need for a Masterlist just yet. But when you DO start posting, please come back to me and I’ll let you know how to put one in your bio, okay? Nice and shiny for your future followers.

If you wanna change your theme go to browse themes, change it from “all themes” to “free themes”. If you like mine, it’s called “Accesible”. If you just want the font, get out of the theme screen and scroll the screen on the left. Turn ON “open dyslexic

Remember, you can do all of this on desktop too, it doesn’t have to be on safari

—

Now onto posting, I have some opinions that might offend my mutuals (oopsie)

I can’t tell the difference, but PERSONALLY, I think posting fics on tumblr from my phone is gross. But that’s also because I’m writing 1000+ words normally and it gets difficult to post

If you want to post fics with more than 100 paragraphs, then you have to go to desktop or maybe safari tumblr (I don’t post from safari tumblr so idk if it works) because tumblr says NO paragraphs after 100 on mobile. There is no restriction on computer

I write in Google Docs, because it’s neater and I’ve discovered some hate for Word after deleting some of the shit I wrote over and over. Plus it’s an app, and you can open it up on computer. Easy to use.

If you use Notes on your phone, or type directly onto a tumblr post, then that’s fine but you don’t know your word count and it’s a little difficult to navigate.

When it comes to formatting, I used to have it be really long. But I’ve narrowed it down to 3, sometimes 4 things.

Summary: this is where I put the request so the anon/person knows that it’s their request. (I copy n paste the entire request in the summary part, I don’t answer asks (requests) anymore because it’s easier to answer them after I posted).

Warnings: my permanent is swearing, and then I add on (what type) violence, murder, suic*de, gore, etc DEPENDING ON THE REQUEST

Word count: and I do this because I write long imagines sometimes and some people don’t want to sit through 5k words of boring shit

And the optional—Note: I put this if I thank someone for their patience on the request, if I say happy holidays or some shit like that. I don’t have notes on every post anymore because they just turn out being the same every time

Apart from that, give it a title (make it unique but not too long!) who it’s for and then copy and paste the fic in

I’m using my own posts as an example right here, okay. But I have the summary and all of that bolder because it’s easier to see, and I want it to be different from the actual post. Most fanfic writers do this.

I also put 2 —‘s between the authors note at the top and the fic to also make a difference there

Don’t have the entire fic italicized, it takes away the special part of italicizing a word

Finally, it’s tagging.

I cannot stress this enough, DO NOT tag things that have nothing to do with the post. It’s my biggest pet peeve and it’s because I can’t comprehend why people tag (for example) Katrina Stuart when it’s a fic OR A RANDOM POST about someone else

Instead, let’s keep it simple.

🌸 STOP 🌸

I forgot to mention this. But choose your username wisely. You can change it later on, but it’s a goddamn pain in the ass when you have 50+ fanfics you wrote and your Masterlist is nice and clean only to realize that you have to RELINK every post individually

Listen, I changed my username on my old blog, and it took me 8 hours ROUGHLY to relink and fix every individual Masterlist. I had to create new masterlists, with so many tabs open to fix it

Instead, change it before you start fics

If you wanna be a colby brock blog, I have a canon url (which means that it’s so fucking GOOD and I’m angry that i realized it was open only a month ago rather than when I created this account) and it’s colbysbrocks (it’s a plural canon url). And I have colbysecrets too. If you don’t like either of those, I have a couple of other ideas that I wrote down if you want them

🌸 okay continue 🌸

This is how you should tag:

(I’ll give an example after this)

Your username first, the person it’s about, the fandom (if it’s not Colby brock, then something like marvel, etc). Then the persons name, imagine, fanfic, x reader, and oneshot. Then if it was requested

EXAMPLE ONE:

Azurebrock, Colby brock, Colby brock imagine, Colby brock fanfic, Colby brock x reader, Colby brock oneshot, requested

Simple, right? You can even use this method for Wattpad too.

EXAMPLE TWO:

(This is Star Wars, im using my own username again)

Kylorenlovesyou, Kylo ren, Ben solo, kylo ren imagine, kylo ren fanfic, kylo ren x reader, kylo ren oneshot, Ben solo imagine, Ben solo fanfic, Ben solo x reader, Ben solo oneshot, Star Wars

Notice that I tagged both of his names. I do this because it draws more people in, and more people will be attracted to it (however, in the Star Wars fandom there’s a difference between Ben Solo and Kylo-Ren, so you would have to specify in the title Ex. Resistance (Ben Solo) or Struggle (Kylo-Ren). It would depend on which persona you’re using

This works for a couple of fandoms, like twilight and shit like that

EXAMPLE THREE:

(Final one, I just wanted to cover this base just in case)

If it’s a request for more than one person. Let’s say Colby Brock and Sam Golbach (like a Polyamorous relationship, if it’s just about a bunch of people, tag the people in it and don’t put the imagine, fanfic, x reader, oneshot after any of them, it doesn’t apply)

If it’s a poly relationship (or maybe more) then do everything you normally do for one person, and then just add on the second;

Azurebrock, Colby brock, Sam Golbach, Colby brock imagine, Sam Golbach imagine, etc

If you’re on desktop, I would suggest putting in a Read More (this goes BEFORE your fic but after the authors note, below the 2 —‘s). The way you do that is press enter, and hover over the new break in the fic.

Off to the right you’ll see a . . . Click that and then you have the read more. I would only suggest using this if there’s more than 500 words, so that if the fic is super long, it doesn’t take up the entire dash for the follower (it takes forever to scroll and it’s annoying

If you’re on mobile, it isn’t possible. Just post and you can go back and edit later if you have a computer

[hobiwonder]

Fifty Shades of Jimin | (m)

Pairing: Jimin x Reader 

Genre: Smut, some plot if you squint??. Noona!reader. Sub!Jimin

Warnings: Dry sex, dry humping. Dirty talk. Just some good old foreplay. Noona kink. 

Words: 6.5k

Summary: Remember when jimin once said he couldn't rec the books he read because they were a little... yeah. 

A/N: this is also from my old blog but i deleted it from there too bc i hated it jkbdeifuwbfl. one of the first smuts I ever wrote and im so sorry for posting so much jimin lately lmao. but like he’s so easy for me to write. I edited this a little bit to make it less horrendous since I wrote it over a year and half ago oops. hope you guys enjoy. feedback appreciated my loves.

Today you decided to finally go to the dorms to teach English to V, Jimin and Jungkook as you had all planned. But seeing as the boys were always so busy, your plans kept getting interrupted and they had to leave for their Promo in Japan for their Japanese album and MV of Blood, Sweat and Tears. You saw them at least once a month in the past 6 or so months since your aunt was the senior stylist for BigHit and you liked to tag along to her work. Nonetheless, you and the younger ones, despite you being 2 years older than Jimin, had still decided to spend some time together outside of work related events to have a fun session of English. You had become quite close with the BigHit family over these months and you loved seeing the boys. It all started when your aunt decided to take you to work with her to the dress rehearsals for MAMA in 2016.

You having just returned from overseas after completing your degree, knew minimal details about the entertainment and idol culture in Korea. Having grown up surrounded by Kanye West and Britany Spears, you always thought that the Korean pop scene was way too manufactured and lacked authenticity. You didn’t quite understand how hard could it be being an idol. You just had to look good, sound moderately respectable and dye your hair every other month, right? Didn’t sound too challenging, given that you have those idol looks. It always seemed to come down to looks it seemed. Thus, you never paid much attention to your Aunt’s job or recognized your mother’s efforts to send you back to Korea to maybe tie the knot with a rich idol – Typical mother wanting to set you up for life.

However, when you did decide to finally go abroad and take a break from your normal life, your aunt had convinced you somehow to make a trip to Korea. After being in the country for just 2 weeks, you had quickly found out how busy she was with continuous shopping trips to plan outfits for the idol group she worked with, in advance. It was then that you had found out that she worked for BigHit and was a senior stylist and makeup artist for the famous boy group, BTS. You had heard a fair bit about them from your Korean friends and even some American friends who raved about their looks and voices, but mostly looks, which further pulled you away from having any genuine interest. Though, being too focused on your studies and just the normal party scene, you didn’t deem it too important to pay attention or inquire from your aunt if she knew, let alone worked for the famous boys that everyone seemed to swoon over. After not being able to spend a decent day together even when living with her for a good 2 weeks, it was then that your aunt decided to take you to work with her so you can meet the famous Bulletproof boys that your aunt also seemed to fangirl over.

When you had arrived at the BigHit building, you were instantly met by curious, yet warm stares. No doubt wondering who the foreigner was. Your aunt was quick to introduce you to everyone and soon enough, everyone on the team had welcomed you with open arms, taking extra care of you as a guest of your aunt. Every room had been bustling with people running around, calling out each other’s names to make sure each one had done their part and were ready for fittings. The boys had arrived shortly after, greeting everyone with bows and smiles. The first thing that you noticed was how beautiful they all were. Of course, you were expecting them to be quite eye catching but never did you think they would be this handsome. The first one to notice a new face was V, whose real name you later learned to be Taehyung. He had come up to you and smiled his charismatic boxy smile and waved while greeting you in Korean, which you returned. His smile was seriously contagious. After that, you greeted the rest of the boys, each one of them making your jaw almost drop at how their skin glowed. Though, you had only greeted 6 boys. You had been told there were 7 members? You shrugged and chatted with the ones that were present. You could mostly understand Korean and speak some passable Korean but you still preferred to reply to your aunt in English, being the most comfortable with it. So when you had begun chatting with them, it was no problem connecting with them all as you could understand them and they could understand your English fairly well,  helping you when you did reply in Korean.

Every once in a while, you would forget to pay attention to what they were saying, getting distracted by their sharp features and handsome faces. It was then when your aunt called for you from the room adjacent to where you all sat, you excused yourself and went to see what she was after, finally, meeting the last member known as Jimin. You remember being completely entranced by a head of cool blonde hair, a face chiselled to perfection and lips plumper than yours and as red as strawberries. Your first thought had been about how they would taste and the thought had been interrupted when the boy that all those features belong to had noticed you standing in the doorway and smiled hesitantly, not being completely sure about how to react seeing an unfamiliar face. Your aunt in turn also noticed the stiffness in the boy’s body as she was tightening the collar of his shirt and looked up to ask you to fetch a piece of garment for her. You mutely followed her instructions. when you finally came back to face the boy again, your aunt, at last, decided to introduce you two. Jimin had smiled in understanding that you were there with your aunt and had given you a cute smile that reached his eyes, almost completely closing them. when you smiled back and extended your hand to shake his, he had shyly looked at it and shook yours while the mysterious little smile still played on his lips. Once again, you were entranced by his good looks and immediately face palmed internally at your earlier first thought of making out with him when he was shy as fuck with just even shaking your hand. After Jimin’s fitting had finished, he had joined the rest of the group. One by one, all of them had their fittings done while you hung out with them, surprisingly having the best time, and enjoying their company more than you expected to.

You had a completely different scenario in mind. You had imagined them to be stuck up, being too busy with keeping up their idol image even behind the scenes and barely engaging with the team. All of them had proven you wrong, talking to almost everyone at the company, being cooperative and even welcoming you, a practical stranger and making you feel at ease. All of them were insanely handsome, down to earth and funny as hell. Throughout the day you found yourself doubling over with laughter multiple times watching the boys interact with each other. Especially the eldest, Jin, had been the biggest player in providing the laughs while the others had teased him and each other about various things. However, you noticed that even the youngest, Jungkook had warmed up to you despite having the reputation of being ‘scared’ of girls and seemed quite comfortable around you. Perhaps maybe it was because you were older than him. No matter, Jimin, the boy with lips made to sin, was still shy, never directly meeting your gaze or making direct conversation. Always settling with just chiming in when other members talked to you first. Whatever it was, you found it insanely cute that he was this shy even though you should be the one who gets flustered in this scenario seeing how his beauty surpassed yours by a million. It also made you feel quite guilty when your thoughts turned x-rated every once in a while when you caught his shy gaze. He looked too cute and innocuous for his own good. Too pure.

That was, however, to be expected. Having grown up in overseas, there was no such thing as shame and you weren’t exactly the virgin Mary either. The culture in Korea was entirely different and you were certain that Jimin, and the rest of the boys, were not raised in an environment as sexually open and liberated as yours. In fact, you were certain that Jimin was inexperienced, if not a virgin. Keeping that fact in mind, you noticed that you chastised yourself quite often over the coming months.

It was like you couldn’t keep it in your pants. You noticed that all the boys acted cuter than sexy and that seemed to be the case for pretty much any idol. Sure, there were sexy ‘concepts’ but that is pretty much all. The Korean audience always preferred cuteness over sexiness. A lot of it also having to do with how too much sexiness being disapproved and looked down upon by the older generation and you could respect that. However, it was hard not to let your mind wander to the gutter when you saw them perform for the first time. It had taken your breath away to see a completely different side of the boys come out when they were on stage. Once again, you were charmed. Perhaps, the biggest change in aura was a tie between Hoseok and Jimin. Both having a bright, bubbly and sweet personality off stage and being the complete opposite on stage with their sharp moves, fearless expressions and languid body movements. J-Hope appeared to be more fearless with sharp movements whereas Jimin’s dancing had you spellbound and wondering how a human body can move so effortlessly and gracefully, exuding a cool sexiness while simultaneously maintaining his undeniable innocent character that he portrayed to his audience.

These weeks turned into months of keeping in contact with them all through your aunt’s job and you got closer. Your friendship with the hyung line had developed more so than with the younger ones. This was mostly due to your personality being more on the serious side. Though that’s not to say that you didn’t immensely enjoy Jin’s ridiculous dad jokes and even encouraged him on more than one occasion. Talking to Namjoon in English also had a big part in it and seeing as Hoseok’s English was good enough to converse with him as well as Yoongi so you tended to gravitate towards the elders more than the young ones. But this didn’t stop the shouts of ‘Noona’ from the younger boys whenever they wanted to show you something they found to be cool or when Jungkook was simply being the little brat he was. Before you knew it, Producer Bang had asked you to teach the boys some basic conversing English, given that you had graduated college, so the pressure is somewhat lifted from Namjoon’s shoulders. You had happily agreed to it as an informal arrangement because you had started a fulltime Job.

And finally, here you were, finally at the dorms. You furrowed your eyebrows at the unusual silence in the house.

“Jungkook?” You call out, taking off your shoes and placing them on the shoe rack. After hearing silence, you figured that since you were still in the hallway, they just didn’t hear you. Walking further in to the living room, inspecting your surroundings, which had no signs of any of the boys being home as the TV was off and the game console that is usually always on standby, was also off. Sighing, you knew that the older boys were going to be out but having a suspicion that the younger ones weren’t home either.

“Taehyung? Are you guys in your rooms?” You call out as you walk towards the kitchen and to their bedrooms, knocking. After no response, you open the door and as predicted, there was no one in sight.

“Should have known.” you click your tongue, pursing your lips in annoyance because this wasn’t the first time they had done this. Suddenly, you hear a noise coming from further away. Your head snaps up, looking towards the direction of the noise.

So someone was home. Walking out of the room slowly and silently, hoping to figure out what and where it was coming from, soon enough, you hear it again. However, it was noticeably a moan, though you couldn’t figure out whether the person was in pain or not. You notice the noise coming from Jimin’s room and your heart starts racing thinking someone had broken in but that was impossible – they had 24hr security so you calm yourself down.

Walking forward towards the room, your anger returns, waiting to be taken out on whichever one of the boys was in the room. You drove 20 minutes just for these brats to not even be at home? Just as you were about to knock on the door, the undeniable sound of a moan stops you in your tracks. And not just anyone’s; Jimin’s moan? The one that seemed to be the cutest, shyest of the bunch according to you. The sound was utterly scandalous and shocking while your mouth going a bit dry, thinking about what was happening.

It was pretty clear now, at what was going on behind the door. This house was always full of boys. You couldn’t exactly blame them if one of them decided to take advantage of the privacy. You contemplate if you should just leave, or confront Jimin about the plans you guys had made. Give him a peace of your mind and ask him why didn’t he stop the other boys from making other plans when they knew you were coming over.

You being the hothead you were, decide to go with the later. Knocking on the door twice, calling his name more clearly now. “Jimin? Can I come in?”

You hear shuffling on the other end and a stuttered response from Jimin telling you to wait a minute. When he finally opens the door, you are met with a swollen lipped and sweat flushed Jimin. His pupils are visibly dilated; his hair is a mess as if he had run his hands through it a thousand times. You couldn’t think of a sexier picture. BUT, you wanted to stay focused on tearing the brat a new one for having the nerve to jerk off and blowing off your plans like it’s nothing. You especially made time for this.

“Noona? W-What’re you doing here?” He asks looking at you, nervously fidgeting with his hands.

“What am I doing here? You seriously don’t remember? We were supposed to have a lesson today?” You say as you push past him and into the room, exasperated.

Jimin follows you in, with a confused look as the wheels turned in his head. After a few seconds of his looking at you puzzled while you deadpan him, it seems to click.

“Oh shit.” He face palmed himself, looking at you sheepishly. “Please believe me noona, it really did slip my mind.”

“Don’t ‘oh shit’ me you dingus. I had reminded you two days ago and even texted you this morning.” You glare harshly at him, plopping down on his bed and folding your arms under your chest.

Jimin avoids your gaze as he looks down with an embarrassed smile, scratching the back of his neck. The action lifts his shirt up, giving you a peak at his solid V line, dragging your mind back to hell. Jimin had started saying something, though you could barely remember what as you take in his attire. He looked soft, pink and ready for bed and his sweatpants were extremely distracting. When you reach his face, you are met with reluctant eyes that had obviously caught you checking him out. The blush on his face said so clearly.

You sigh for the second time in less than 10 minutes, leaning back on your arms and looking around his room which was somewhat messy.

“You know that I don’t live close by and had to make time for our lesson. Yet you let those two brats go and are having the time of your life here by yourself.” It was a statement and Jimin listened on obediently with his hands in front of him, eyes respectfully drawn downwards.

“Well… i-if it makes you feel any better, I’ve been reading English books?” He says hopefully.

“Yeah? What books?” He goes to look in his bedside drawer and pulls out several English books and sits beside you, ready to be a dutiful student. Though that’s not what makes your blood run hot and saliva starting to pool in your mouth. Definitely not it. It’s definitely not the way his sweatpants hint at what’s underneath, due to him sitting with his legs spread, either. Though it definitely makes you want to fuck him even more.

“Noona?” you noticed that you had completely stilled and not heard, for the second time, what Jimin had been previously saying. Instead, your eyes are firmly locked on the copy of Fifty Shades of Grey beside the pillow. You were guessing he had tried to hide it, though it clearly didn’t work out. You don’t know what had possessed you to do the things you were about to do, but clearly, the lust for this damn boy had finally won. Picking up the book and bringing it in Jimin’s line of sight as well you look him straight in the eyes. Completely composed except the rising heat in your body. He on the other hand, looked like a deer caught in the headlights.

“Is this your idea of ‘studying’ English, Jiminie?” You quirk up your brow. Beside you, Jimin had gone completely still, breathing hard, trying to look anywhere but at you.

“I-I can explain n-noona.”

“Oh? You can?” you asked in a voice dripping with honey. Sometime between this exchange, you have leaned closer to him, almost feeling his breath on your face. Jimin visibly gulps, desperately trying to think of something to say. Tsking in his face at the lack of his response. Who knew Jimin was into getting off to erotic books?

“I never imagined you to be the one to read dirty books, sweet Jiminie. I guess you have been fooling everyone all this time huh?” your face was even closer to his now. His was beet red, breathing quite firm now while his eyes constantly shifting from your lips to your eyes. Impulsively, you lick your lips at the sight of his plush ones that were currently shiny and swollen.

“I thought you were about to explain yourself? Use your words brat.” You say loudly this time causing Jimin to gasp and back away slightly in alarm.

“I-It has a n-nice storyline?” He says more like a question than his own opinion. Scoffing at his reply, knowing that he was clearly trying to save face you shake your head tauntingly at him. Having way too much fun with his flushed face and furrowed brows that made it look like he was genuinely scared of you.

“Please, honey, we both know that it has little to no storyline. Are you lying to me Jimin?”

“N-No?”

“First I find out that you forgot about your English lesson and now you are trying to make a fool of me?” You almost spit out the words. You are definitely being overdramatic. But the reaction that you are getting from him is worth it. Plus, he did piss you off anyway. This was incredibly hot to you. The fact that Jimin read this filthy book, a BDSM book at that, and got off to it, turned you on to no end.

“No n-noona, that’s n-not-”

“Then tell me the real reason you were reading this.” Jimin looks extremely conflicted, deciding between keeping his pride or letting go in this extremely heated scenario but when you look him dead in the eyes as you nearly spit the words out, he finally speaks

“I don’t have all day Jimin, don’t waste my time more than you already have.”

Then, you heard the faintest whisper – breathless and shameful. You weren’t even sure if you actually heard it at all.

“It’s hot..”

“What was that babe? You read it because you it makes you hot?”

Jimin bit his plump bottom lip, looking up before meeting your gaze and nodding his head. That was all the confirmation you needed to go ahead with this. Believe it or not, you actually were thinking about just leaving, not taking this any further because you were sure no one was going to praise you for bedding an idol who was 2 years your Junior – in Korea at least. It wasn’t much of a difference really. But in the society you lived, it definitely would be as opposed to where you came from.

“Oh Jiminie… you like reading porn? Hm? You liked reading about some rich guy fucking a girl for his pleasure, doing all sorts of dirty things to her? Hm?” You egg him on and he doesn’t move his eyes away from you.

Jimin’s breathing is getting more and more laboured by the passing second. You move your hands from your lap to place it on his thigh. Dragging your fingers slowly up and down as Jimin’s eye follow their movements. Then he nods once again.

“Use your words Jiminie.”

“Y-Yes.”

“Were you touching yourself when I knocked?” You whisper tantalisingly, dragging your hands up to his face hoping he’d let loose a bit, and indulge your filthy desires to have him come undone. He was warm beneath your touch, unusually so.

“W-What if I say yes?” You chuckle lowly against his face at his shaky response. Your forehead was now resting against his as your hand was on his right cheek, keeping him to you firmly.

“Then I guess you’re a dirty little boy Jimin, touching yourself over a dirty book.” You tsked once again. “Tell me, did you imagine it was you getting your cock sucked in the book, instead of the male character?” Jimin lookw completely lost in your words, almost in a trance as he stares in your eyes.

“Yes.” This was the first time he had replied without stuttering. You take that as a good sign – continuing. Though, you are slowly losing control yourself too. He just looked so hot sitting there, completely compelled by you with his eyes now closed, answering you like his life depended on it, skin shining with perspiration and smelling like orange blossom. You close your eyes, willing yourself to be stronger for a bit more, tease him a bit more. You sigh again, for the third time, however this time, due to the heavy desire clouding your brain.

“Did you imagine someone doing it to you? Taking your cock in their mouth?”

“Y-Yes.” Your breath hitched. You had some idea, or maybe it was your wishful thinking, that he thought about you. You had caught him more than once - multiple occasions – staring at you then looking away bashfully.

“Who… who did you think of?” At this question his eyes shoot open, looking into yours as if to decide whether it would be appropriate for him to answer. You laugh inside, knowing that all the barriers of pertinence have been surpassed.

“Y-you…noona.” He whimpers. Actually whimpers aloud and you almost groan out loud at his answer. In a flash you have pushed Jimin back on the bed and straddled his hips, leaning down until your hair fell to the side and face was a mere inch away from his. Both of your breaths were shallow. Jimin looked a bit surprised from being still all this while and then your sudden outburst. Though you definitely preferred this position as it allowed you to feel every ridge of Jimin’s perfectly sculpted body. Your core aligning with his perfectly.

“You’re so bad Jiminie… thinking about noona like that.” You shake your head slowly in mock admonishment, looking into his eyes that were still enlarged with surprise. It seemed like Jimin didn’t know where to put his hands, on the bed or your hips. Even in your compromising position, still, he hesitated.

“I’m sorry noona I-I-” He sounded almost ashamed. To ease his discomfort, you decide to fess up yourself as well.

“It’s okay baby, noona has been thinking naughty things about you too. How can I not, when you look like this.” You bit your lip looking down between your bodies, noticing how hard he was underneath you. Pressing angrily against your clit. This was the great pro of Jimin not being insanely tall, being able to press him directly against your core while still being able to reach his lips. Speaking of his lips, you decided to kiss them. You finally leaned down, brushing yours against his plump ones.

“Jiminie, noona is going to kiss you now, would you like that?” Jimin’s eyes have closed instinctively, anticipating the kiss, nodding his head. And then you pressed down on him lightly, prompting him to be vocal.

“Y-Yes please, kiss me.”

This was all you needed as you crashed your lips against his, moaning as your lips met and tasted his for the first time. It didn’t take long until you felt the first swipe of his tongue against your lips and you both opened your mouths, slipping your tongues and tasting each other deeper. Jimin tasted of strawberry lollipops that he always was sucking on and it made your head spin. His hands were now on your waist, careful to keep them away from your hips until you took his hands pushed them further down. You felt like you were drowning in him as his kisses were getting out of control. Your efforts to keep the kiss slow and sensual were being interrupted by Jimin’s needy ones as he kept leaning up, giving you short but deep kisses as if he would die without them. It was almost getting hard to breath so you broke away to take in a much needed gulp of air. Jimin leaned up, chasing your lips with his eyes still closed. Instead, he settled for your neck, digging his face in, just resting there while he sucked the skin gently.

“Jimin, honey, s-slow down.” You gasped as he grazed his teeth against the skin in his mouth. Irrefutable pleasure was coursing through your body and you had barely done anything with Jimin except kiss. Jimin was truly like a drug. He was fucking addicting. You already knew that this won’t be the last time you touch him like this. And by the looks of it, seems like Jimin won’t either. He was now whimpering, making whiney sounds trying to get you to kiss him again.

“N-noona, please.”

“Please what baby?” You grasped his hair, pulling him back from your neck to look into his glistening eyes.

“Do something.” He moaned out, pushing up into your hips, making you gasp and push down. You grabbed his hands and pinned his arms above his head with a tough tug.

“Don’t tell me what to do brat and do not move until I tell you to. Understood?”

When Jimin nodded his head you grasped his cheeks with your hand, making his plush lips stand out even more in a pout.

“I said, do you understand?”

“Yes. Yes, I understand. But please, d-do something. I-It hurts.” At the sound of a helpless Jimin, your resolve was weakening and you softened your tone.

“Hurts where baby? Tell me, let noona fix it.” You ask sweetly. Jimin rolls his head to the side with a bite of his lips.

“Y-You know where, please.”

“I’m afraid I don’t Jiminie. Tell me. Come on, you can do it.” You coo gently, free hand caressing his cheeks.

Jimin closed his eyes burying his face in your neck and whispering his answer softly.

“M-My dick.”

“What baby?” You ask again with a pitiless smirk on your face, wanting him to be senseless; almost. And god bless, it was worth it considering Jimin was now a moaning, whimpering and whiney mess.

“Fuck, my cock Y/N. It hurts. Please touch m-my cock.”

With a low chuckle, you fastened your hands back up, pinning his to the bed as you started to move your hips back and forth on the hardened length underneath, slowly. As soon as you started, Jimin had lost control over his vocal cords it seemed. You never suspected that calm and collected Jimin, the bashful cute boy, to be this vocal and messy in bed.

“Ah. Yes! yes yes yes noona. Fuck me. Rub your pussy on me Y/N, fuck yes.” His words were burning you alive. Your pace was increasing with each chant from his mouth and slightly due to Jimin’s constant squirming, trying to stay still and obeying your command. To be honest, you didn’t care at this point. The pressure in your lower stomach was starting to build. All that build up from before had you coming nearly to your end. Not to forget that Jimin turned out to be a dirty talker anda moaner. Fuck, he was a moaner. His sounds alone were making you come undone.

“Noona.” Jimin whined in his incredibly sexy, raspy voice.

“Yeah baby?”

“M-More, please, I’m so close.”

You let go of his arms, reaching down to pull his shirt up and over his head, coming in contact with his hard pectoral and abdominal muscles. Jimin had taken this opportunity to push his hips up into you, making you half gasp and moan at the hard length pushing against your clit so deliciously – just right. You brace yourself placing your hands on his chest, breathing hard.

“Jimin, baby, h-hold on a minute. Let’s take these off.” You say as you begin pulling his sweats off him, leaning back to take them off completely. Jimin gladly helped as he looked about ready to burst. You were definitely not prepared for what you saw. Hard, thick and girthy length. He was bigger than you had imagined. Almost disproportionate for his frame. Almost. Jimin’s confidence had seemed to be boosted when compared to about an hour ago when he was a stuttering, blushing mess of a boy. You took a moment to admire him. He looked like a fucking Greek god with his chiselled, golden body, hair a mess, lips swollen, cock hard and ready. And as you were about to get back in to position, you feel his hands tugging at your pants.

“T-take these off noona. Please.” He looked in your eyes hopefully. You bit your lip and placed your hands by your side, silently directing Jimin to do the honours. His face bloomed with a beautiful pink flush as he pulled the zipper down on your jeans, tugging them down. You lifted your hips for him to pull them down further and off your legs. He was staring in amazement at your panty clad hips, your long legs – almost mesmerized. Taking your previous position again, you lean down to get closer to his face once again while you start the grind of your clit on his cock. You abandoned all hope of being slow and sensual as feral need had took over you because it was hard to stay sane and consistent when Jimin was looking at you like you owned his world. Your core being ultra-sensitive, making every brush of his hard length a hundred times more lethal. Not to forget that his length was not confined beneath the constricting material of his sweatpants anymore. You almost cum when you hear a high pitched whimper from Jimin. Speaking of coming.

“Jiminie, did you come before?” You ask, referring to him touching himself earlier. Jimin, being the groaning mess he was, took a few seconds to reply.

“N-No – mm- but I was about to- Ah!” You pinned his hands above his head again, pouting at him mockingly.

“Aw, poor baby. It’s okay honey, noona will make you cum.” He whimpers at your words, thrusting up harshly, battering your clit at this point.

“Noona, f-faster, please, make me cum noona. Please please please” Fucking hell. Jimin was straight up begging you. You knew Jimin might be submissive, but never thissubmissive. It was such a contrast to how he controlled thousands of screaming girls with a flash of his abs. And here he was, a moaning, sweaty mess. Spouting such filthy words.

Your movements had slowed down a bit as your body was getting exhausted. You were about to come even just from this. But this boy’s stamina was obviously higher than yours. Jimin noticing your fatigued body took action. Boy did he take action. In an instant, Jimin had you flipped over, pull you underneath his body, lining his cock with your covered pussy, where a substantial wet spot was embarrassingly visible. You looked at him with disbelief

“I can’t take it anymore, p-please let me?” Jimin asked with a sinful roll of his cock against your pussy. The contact was so close now that you could feel your lower lips parting, nestling his cock between them. You shakily nodded, wrapping your legs around his hips in response because watching his sweaty sculpted body work on top of you – on your pussy – was the biggest turn on of your life. He was lithe but muscled and every roll and every glide had you losing your mind.

“Go ahead Jiminie… U-Use noona’s pussy to make yourself cum.” Jimin whimpered at your words he wasted no time in following your orders, picking up his pace and fucking you into his bed. The bed had started to creak with the force of his thrusts. Each time he dragged his hips, his cock slid against your pussy lips and up to your clit, creating the best friction. All of these sensations happened so fast as Jimin was almost moving too fast for you. Scratch that, he was moving too fast for you.

“J-Jimin, ah! B-baby, slow down. Oh fuck.” His pace was relentless. Grinding his hips in your cunt as fast as he could, moaning like he was almost in pain. It was obvious he was chasing his release and lucky for him, you were right about ready to burst. You could sense it as your legs tried to close despite having Jimin’s slender body in-between them. You could see his abs clench with the force of his thrusts and couldn’t believe that the ever so prim and proper Park Jimin was on top of you, thrusting his cock against your pussy, pursuing his pleasure like nothing else mattered. If someone had told you a week ago that you would be in your position, dry humping the shit out of each other, you probably would’ve slapped them. Though this wasn’t so much dry anymore. Your panties were a sticky mess from your own arousal as well as Jimin’s pre-cum being all over them, creating the most iniquitous sounds as sweat dripped from his forehead. The knot was so tight in your stomach that you almost couldn’t bear it.

“Fuck, fuck baby, I’m coming! Jimin-ah!”

“Fuck yes Y/N c-cum for me.” Jimin’s pace helped you tip over the edge in a euphoric bliss. Your vision had turned white for a few seconds with the force of your orgasm coursing through you as Jimin continued to thrust his cock against you. It felt like you came for a life time. Your pussy had become extremely sensitive from your orgasm and you weren’t sure how much more of Jimin’s grinding you could take. Placing little suckles and opened kisses on his vascular neck, you help him along to his own release.

“Come on baby, you can do it. Cum for noona. Cum all over noona.” Jimin whined at your words, getting on the verge of his release and you couldn’t believe that he had held out this long.

“I’m s-so close Y/N noona.”

“That’s it baby, just a little m-more.” Your words coming out in a stutter at how scorched your clit was now, being already so sensitive as it was after your orgasm. But, you held out for Jimin, letting him use you as a vessel to get himself off and it only made you wetter. His rhythm had become irregular and his cries had gotten louder.

“F-Fuck, I’m coming oh fuck.” Jimin swore like a sailor as he got dangerously close. But what he did next almost made you come again. With a speed almost quicker than a gunshot, Jimin had leaned back, pushed your panties down exposing your swollen pussy. Before you could comprehend what was happening, Jimin worked his hand over his cock until he had let go. Until he came all over your pussy. Sticky hot white ropes of cum landing on your swollen clit and labia. You moaned at the scene unfolding above you because this was the hottest shit you had ever encountered. Of course you will punish him later for this but still. Where the fuck was this Jimin hiding before?

After he had let out what seemed to be an endless stream of milky white cum, Jimin falls forward, resting his face in your neck, panting. You both took this time to catch your breath. Several moments passed as you both laid in his bed, you stroking his hair as you stare up at the ceiling just resting in silence before you speak softly.

“You okay baby?” You whispered, tenderly stroking his hair, to which he replied with a blissful hum.

“Never been better.” He replied with a sweetly shy and sleepy smile, indicating that his usual charming self was back as the lust had settled.

You kiss his cheek softly, savouring the moment with the younger boy and move to get up when Jimin pulls you back again.

“Where are you going?”

“To clean up the mess you made, you brat.” Your teasing tone was obvious which makes Jimin blush again deeply as he bites his lip. But his next request surprises you.

“C-Can I clean you noona?” His request seemed innocent enough considering the context of this indecent scenario.

“I guess you can.” You lay back down as Jimin gets up, sliding down the bed, sitting beside your hips.

“Uh, Jimin? Aren’t you going to get towels?” your brows have furrowed in confusion when he didn’t move from his position, instead moved between your legs, parting them again.

With a lovely sweet smile, dimple visible endearingly on his cheek, he places a kiss on your ankle before speaking.

“Why would I need those when I have a mouth, noona?”

Fuck what you said before. This was the hottest shit you had ever encountered.

a/n: yeah ik its bad lmao. i swear i write better now kjwbjhwqkbfkbf. Thanks for reading!!

[bakedpieceofchicken]

ao3 tag meme

its my blog and im allowed to run it like the anxiety-ridden coward i am...

tagged by @waxwingedhawks 

Ao3 account: lemondropped (if you go look for it, theres 0 works attached. you can still find my bad apple series though... bleh. thanks, i hate it. despite it being the most popular thing ive ever written)

Current Writing Summary:

Current word count for the year:  68252

Number of stories (including drabbles) posted to ao3: 26 

Fandoms I wrote for: 9

Pairings I have written for:

Background pairings? Tododeku, Bakushima, Tsuchako, Shigadabi 

Main pairings? Dabihawks, Shigahawks, Shigadabihawks (oh, there’s a pattern, isn’t there?)

Story with the most kudos: Bad apple, regrettably

Story with the most bookmarks / Story with the most subscriptions: I’ll find you sooner than the stars, more regrettably (people wanna know what comes next? why?!)

Story I’m most proud of: shitty dad club (its the one fic i can say i have no problems with despite having written it like 4-5 months ago.....)

What’s ahead: 

- family dinner reunion future fic  

- hotwings music festival AU ft. league of villains (was written for day 2 quirkless dabihawks week 2k19, want to put a lot of care into it. i have no idea if ill get hate for associating myself with this fic cause someone out there might have a problem with it but eh i guess ill just have to post it when finished and see.)

- shigahawks childhood friends AU (i have like 4k words written so far? its more canon divergence than actual AU but im taking my time with it. whether its any good or not is anybody’s guess)

- the second half of supreme art of war...................................... camera pans into my face if i ever told you i had any idea what i was doing, it was all a fucking lie. Also the first half needs to be renovated/edited to be like... better. it feels a little unpolished and even at the time of writing that first chapter, i was perfectly aware how OOC the last part was but also i’m getting a little better at writing shigaraki because this man somehow sneaks his way into all my fics now... anyways...

- i started working on this pro heroes interact with Hawks story but idk if i’ll ever finish it lol. i think im like 4/9 pro-heroes done? there’s a +1 too (is this story format dead? who knows, ah whatever im still doing it)

- fuyumi fic thats getting finished at the pace of a snail. im putting a lot of care and effort into it, is all. probably will turn out boring but eh :) that’s the risk you gotta take when writing fanfiction

- chapter 4 of ill find you sooner than the stars? here (i made this a couple of weeks ago):

i probably... need to go back... and edit this one too.... to be less edgy................. or maybe i should just embrace the edginess. become self aware. like dont half-ass the edginess, go all the way in. deliver the edgy angst story everyone wants me to!!!! ahahaha starts coughing i can’t believe im associating myself with this piece of hot garbage that people apparently like. nobody cares but im definitely going to shift the story (assuming i continue it) to monoma and shinsou because im kinda sick of deku and the deku POV probably doesnt serve the narrative too well in the long run. amazing, 10/10 bakedpieceofchicken, youre hot edgy deku trash we all know now :eyes: 

ill tag @izdekumidoriya (have u done it already? i have no idea! sorry for making you look at this lol... hopefully u just scanned it instead of actually reading what i put down), @tsvchakos (if youre seeing this, it means i got over my anxiety to post this! woo!!!!), and uh... im not feeling particularly brave enough to tag more mutuals (knowing they have to see this post...) so i’ll leave it at that. if you want to do it, go ahead. you can say i tagged you too :>

[boymeetsweevil]

and wrapped your arms around my neck - nsfw

Pairing: Reader x Seokjin

Word Count: ~2k

Summary:  Vamp!Jin if you squint and then close your eyes entirely, this is 90% just sex yall

Part of you wants to see his expression, to gauge whether he’s weirded out by your hyper-sensitive neck. The other part of you wants to stay still and be good with the hopes that he’ll keep playing with you until your toes are curling in ecstasy.

You settle for something in the middle instead.

“How long have you been thinking about doing this?”

Based off this ask:

A/N: I’m so so so sorry this has been in my askbox for so long! When I got this I was a week into pre-finals and I wrote it really quickly thinking I would read it over and then send it out before finals but... Im just sending this out today w/o edits... Anon, I hope you didn’t lose hope!! Here you go!

Today marks the 3rd week that you showed Jin the surgery scar on your neck. It had been bugging him ever since, but not in the way that you had worried about, which was why it took three weeks for you to slip up and show your neck to him in the first place.

No, Jin hadn’t really thought much of the scar until he realized after watching more attentively how sensitive it made your neck. Being one of the few tens of thousands of people left who are descendants from the original 7 blood-drinkers didn’t ever seem to affect him until now. All of the sudden he was obsessed with your neck and the scar. It would have made his father ashamed how cliche he was being. But he couldn’t help it.

The first time he realized he might have a problem, he wasn’t even sober. A little after you and he matched on Tinder, you and he had decided to introduce your friend groups and hang out at a bar. He remembers very hazily watching you and your friend Yuna chat up the bartender to finagle a free round of drinks for your table. 

From what he’s managed to gather, Yuna has always been the touchy type-- especially when she’s inebriated. So when she slung her arm over your shoulder and missed, her hand slid down to rest at the space between your bare shoulder blades.You bent over the counter to give the bartender the impression you cared about his story about the onion tattoo on his elbow while Yuna’s hand wriggled up to lay at the base of your neck. The squeal you’d let out was loud and shrill, making Jin’s eyes snap open a bit in confusion. You shrugged her hand off and moved to collect the drinks Yuna got and turned back to the table. Jin wanted to ask if you were okay, but Yoongi handed him beer, breaking his train of thought.

The second time had been the day of your 1month anniversary of being exclusive. 

Jin, being the hopeless romantic that he was, insisted that you make a day of it and go out to eat. You, being the broke master’s student that you are, said it had to be a place where you could potentially pick up the tab for the whole meal and not be set back. You compromised by eating at one of the cleaner outdoor tables at a nearby off-campus Wendy’s. He’d made a big deal about taking you out like it was going to be a surprise bistro. When you took off the blindfold he gave you and saw where you were, you’d attempted to put him in a headlock, but he was too tall and his shoulders were too broad for you to get the right grip.

After a hearty meal of chicken tenders and french fries, Jin shakily pulled a rather expensive necklace (real silver, because you told him your skin was sensitive once) out of his pocket. He’d tried to be extra and push your hair off your neck and put it on for you, but once his fingers accidentally skimmed your neck you shrieked just like you had at the bar and shot away from his grasp, banging the crown of your head against his chin. You blew him in the parking lot as an apology after you put the necklace on yourself to make up for injuring him, but his ego still hurt.

He’d tried asking you about it once. It went something like:

“How come you always do that?”

“Do what,” you’d asked. 

You wrinkled your nose at the smell of the smoke filling room. Yoongi’s parties were notorious and you were definitely grateful for the invitation but he needed a new dealer because his green smelled like shit. Jin reached a hand over to play with the loose hairs that didn’t fit in your ponytail and you unconsciously leaned away.

“That,” he tried again and you ducked again, “How come you always do that?”

“What are you talking about?”

You looked genuinely confused and that’s when Jin realized maybe he would need to approach things differently. 

Today he would do just that.

“Lie down for me. On your stomach.”

You blink owlishly at Jin’s request, you hands freezing in the middle of putting you hair in a bun to save your neck from the sticky summer heat. Jin, on the other hand, seems completely serious and completely comfortable with the situation as he gazes at you from the other end of the couch.

“W-what for?”

“I just want to try something,” he says. When you fail to budge he adds an imploring “Please?” You gape at him again. Jin hadn’t said please since date #2.

“If you stick your thumb in my ear again after you’ve licked it, I’m calling the police.”

“That was one time,” he gripes, “Besides, that’s not what I’m gonna do.”

He gets up from his spot on the couch to give you room to stretch out. The feeling of warm leather cushions on the skin of your arms and legs doesn’t exactly feel good as you lay across the couch. But you’re a sucker for Jin, despite the fact that he’s a brat 90% of the time.

“What are you gonna do,” your voice is muffled from speaking into the upholstery.

“I told you, I just want to try something. Just promise me you won’t scream,” he says, his tone dripping with smugness.

“Why the hell would I--”, you feel Jin gingerly grip the ends of your hair and move it to lay piled on the crown of your head, his fingers splayed across your scalp to hold the locks in place. “Jin?”

"Hmm?” He hums in response and you feel couch dip with the weight of him situating himself to straddle you.

He reaches out and lightly swipes a fingertip across the smooth scar tissue that travels across the nape of your neck. The resulting deep shiver you give brings a slow, dark smile to his face and he can’t help but chuckle. Fucking finally, he thinks.

Part of you wants to see his expression, to gauge whether he’s weirded out by your hyper-sensitive neck. The other part of you wants to stay still and be good with the hopes that he’ll keep playing with you until your toes are curling in ecstasy.

You settle for something in the middle instead. 

“How long have you been thinking about doing this?” 

He rewards you by blowing a small gust of cool air against the clammy skin. Its a nice break from the balmy air.

You’d had the scar for a while, and although you weren’t uncomfortable with it when you were by yourself, other people’s aversion to it influenced you to keep it covered by your hair or clothes most of the time. You thought that since you’d started dating Jin a few months ago he hadn’t managed to figure out what you’d been hiding. Apparently not.

“Wendy’s,” he says, leaving you with not even enough time to let out a ‘what the fuck’ before he invades your space.

He leans down until he’s close enough to inhale the scent of your skin. It smells of clean sweat, lotion, and soap. If you asked him how he felt about the smell on any other person, he’d probably say that he didn’t have any feelings about it. But with you and your neck...its delectable. And he has the sudden urge to use his teeth. Perhaps its the 3% blood-drinker in him, he muses. He probably just has a neck fetish, though.

The plush feeling of the tip of Jin’s nose running along your neck while he settles comfortably on top of you is almost relaxing. Its not enough, though and it leaves you feeling restless enough to wiggle impatiently. He responds by pinning you more firmly to the sofa. His free hand is large and too warm as it wanders up the side of your torso and pulls down the collar of your t-shirt to make more of a landing strip for him. Soon after, his tongue licks a stripe up the skin he just exposed, stopping just below your hairline before going back down to the scar and laving neatly at it.

“Oh my god, Jin.” you whisper. Your voice is small, like being trapped in your throat with all the little gasps he’s wrung out of you so far was enough to call it quits entirely.

“Too much?” He selfishly hopes you say no.

“No, just keep--shit.” 

With your permission, he begins to grind against the thigh he’s laying over. He times each swipe of his tongue to the rhythm of each hip swivel. Each choked off gasp you emit eggs him on further until he nips roughly at the skin without thinking. You gasp at a pitch different from before and he shifts to give you a little more space.

“Sorry, is this okay?”

“Jin, please, its fine. Please. Just-just touch me, okay?”

“Yeah. Fuck yeah.”

He renews his efforts, but this time remembers to wriggle a hand between you and the couch cushions so he can stick his hand up your shirt. He tries to pinch your nipple like he knows you like, but the angle is awkward. It must still work though because soon you’re also snaking your hand down to rub yourself through your underwear. It makes him throb in his pants and suddenly he wishes he had taken his pants off before trying this, but he’s in too deep now. Every time he humps down against the flesh of your thigh you arch upwards into him and press against his length. The constant friction is just on the right side of painful and he’s so certain he’ll come any minute. With that thought he abandons the tight grip he’d developed in your hair and uses both hands to roll and pluck at your nipples. You adjust the angle of your wrist, though its tricky, so you can grind your clit against your palm and crook your fingers deeper against your walls. Everything is wet and sticky and it should be uncomfortable but its not and then Jin moans, high but quiet, in your ear and the pressure in your core seems to snap. You shake as your orgasm overtakes you and sob into a throw pillow as your toes tingle with warmth.

Jin clumsily turns you over, all the while mumbling ‘I want to see your face’. Once you’re on your back, he settles back over you, instantly latching back onto your neck. This time he opts for sucking slow, wet kisses onto the column of your throat until they turn to hickies. Meanwhile his hand finds purchase on the curve of your hip and uses it to yank you as close as possible while he rides on the meat of your thigh. You rake a hand through his sweaty hair and murmur filthy things into his ear until he comes with a shiver into the crook of your neck. 

You both spend a few minutes just breathing shakily on the now disgusting pleather sofa. The popcorn ceiling really needs to be redone at some point, you realize. After what seems like forever Jin removes himself from your neck and sits up on one elbow to look at you. His hair resembles a cockatoo’s feathers and you have to look away before you laugh in his face. 

“What’s funny,” he grins down at you, “I want to laugh too.”

“Go look in a mirror, then. Your hair is a mess.”

“I would say the same to you but actually now I don’t think should.”

“What does that mean?” You shuffle out from under him and head to the bathroom. 

“Baby, wait. Don’t!” He tries to run after you but the awful feeling of underwear sticky with sweat and drying cum made him slow to a waddle. He hears a gasp as you see your reflection in the bathroom mirror. He winces but still comes over.

“Kim Seokjin, what is wrong with you? Look at this, you did this to me!”

He nods bashfully without looking. He doesn’t need to. He knows what the giant dark bruises already blooming on your neck look like. 

“If its any consolation, you have a beautiful neck and I think you should stop hiding it.”

“Fuck you.”

“Fair enough.”

[hallucinosims]

Hi here’s the get to know me tag let’s get to knowing

I was tagged in this by @gunthermunch

125 questions under the cut, if you do decide to read i suggest getting a snack first

I tag @emovatore @humanitys-shortest @liliithvatore if you haven’t done it yet

1. WHAT IS YOUR FULL NAME? Elio

2. WHAT IS YOUR NICKNAME? Lee and Leo are the go-tos in real life but I get called Hall on here and I think that’s a rad nickname too

3. BIRTHDAY? Feb 5th

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE BOOK SERIES? I am a slut for the Percy Jackson series and Leo Valdez was one of the reasons why I started going by Leo more often then my full name

5. DO YOU BELIEVE IN ALIENS OR GHOSTS? Yes yes absolutely yes. One, earth really can’t be the only planet in a universe with infinite possibilities to have life on it, you know? And ghosts is more like a spirit thing.

6. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE AUTHOR? oooh fuck me up this is a hard one uhhhhhh Classic author probably Edgar Allen Poe but Contempoary I’d say Tony Kushner

7. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE RADIO STATION? the Musical Theatre station

8. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FLAVOR OF ANYTHING? I don’t really like... food. I don’t enjoy it. But I guess I like savory over sweet

9. WHAT WORD WOULD YOU USE OFTEN TO DESCRIBE SOMETHING GREAT OR WONDERFUL? neat

10. WHAT IS YOUR CURRENT FAVORITE SONG? Liar by Queen or Greek God by Conan Gray

11. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE WORD? I-Cunt-tic, pronounced like iconic but... you know

12. WHAT WAS THE LAST SONG YOU LISTENED TO? Please Never Fall in love again Ollie MN

13. WHAT TV SHOW WOULD YOU RECOMMEND FOR EVERYBODY TO WATCH? Kidding, that Jim Carrey tv show that premiered this year. Beautifully edited and told story

14. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE TO WATCH WHEN YOU’RE FEELING DOWN? I’ve seen Bohemian Rhapsody 6 times this month alone so probably that on wards

15. DO YOU PLAY VIDEO GAMES? yes

16. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR? dying in the same place i was born

17. WHAT IS YOUR BEST QUALITY, IN YOUR OPINION? my empathy

18. WHAT IS YOUR WORST QUALITY, IN YOUR OPINION? the depression (tm) 

19. DO YOU LIKE CATS OR DOGS BETTER? idk, i’m not really an animal person

20. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON? fall

21. ARE YOU IN A RELATIONSHIP? nah

22. WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU MISS FROM YOUR CHILDHOOD? playing in the ika playscape

23. WHO IS YOUR BEST FRIEND? i have quite a few best friends but when im at school/work then my good friend Julio

24. WHAT IS YOUR EYE COLOR? a very doe eyed dark brown

25. WHAT IS YOUR HAIR COLOR? i re-dyed my hair black recently so let’s go with that

26. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU LOVE? my mom

27. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU TRUST? my dad

28. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU THINK ABOUT OFTEN? myself

29. ARE YOU CURRENTLY EXCITED ABOUT/FOR SOMETHING? going to denmark to be a farm gay on my semester off

30. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST OBSESSION? currently Sims, Queen, and Falsettos (the musical)

31. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW AS A CHILD? i didn’t have cable but there is no way in hell i’m saying cyberchase so, Mia and Miguel

32. WHO OF THE OPPOSITE GENDER CAN YOU TELL ANYTHING TO, IF ANYONE? Julio

33. ARE YOU SUPERSTITIOUS? very

34. DO YOU HAVE ANY UNUSUAL PHOBIAS? none that i can think of

35. DO YOU PREFER TO BE IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA OR BEHIND IT?i actually really enjoy both

36. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE HOBBY? sims

37. WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ? True West, it’s a really good play

38. WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? ...Bohemian Rhapsody for the 6th time

39. WHAT MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DO YOU PLAY, IF ANY? most stringed instruments i can figure out pretty quickly but i’m best at guitar and piano

40. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ANIMAL? humans

41. WHAT ARE YOUR TOP 5 FAVORITE TUMBLR BLOGS THAT YOU FOLLOW? i follow over 5k people i don’t even know who i follow

42. WHAT SUPERPOWER DO YOU WISH YOU HAD? basically Kirby. I want the power to take others powers

43. WHEN AND WHERE DO YOU FEEL MOST AT PEACE? in michigan on rainy afternoons in my bunk bed with my laptop on my lap. Or like, the floor of a bookstore

44. WHAT MAKES YOU SMILE? loaded question

45. WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY, IF ANY? I used to do competitve dance, competitve cheer, biking, and volleyball

46. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE DRINK? watah

47. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WROTE A HAND-WRITTEN LETTER OR NOTE TO SOMEBODY? like a week ago to my grandma, she likes getting post cards in the mail

48. ARE YOU AFRAID OF HEIGHTS? i used to be. not so much anymore

49. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST PET PEEVE? people who saunter. We got places to be fellas

50. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO A CONCERT? yup!

51. ARE YOU VEGAN/VEGETARIAN? i’m to anemic to be either 

52. WHEN YOU WERE LITTLE, WHAT DID YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GREW UP? a performer

53. WHAT FICTIONAL WORLD WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE IN? i’m actually not to into media that take place in other... wait i take it back i wanna live in Hobbiton

54. WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU WORRY ABOUT? breathing

55. ARE YOU SCARED OF THE DARK? ehh sometimes

56. DO YOU LIKE TO SING? It’s a part of my career so hopefully

57. HAVE YOU EVER SKIPPED SCHOOL? i’m skippin school rn

58. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PLACE ON THE PLANET? manhattan Lower East Side

59. WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE? Manhattan’s Lower East Side. I live in the Upper West Side right now and it’s aight but it’s not the LES

60. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS? nope

61. ARE YOU MORE OF AN EARLY BIRD OR A NIGHT OWL? i just dont sleep

62. DO YOU LIKE SUNRISES OR SUNSETS BETTER?sunrises

63. DO YOU KNOW HOW TO DRIVE? nah

64. DO YOU PREFER EARBUDS OR HEADPHONES? earbuds

65. HAVE YOU EVER HAD BRACES? yee

66. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE GENRE OF MUSIC? anything

67. WHO IS YOUR HERO? Tony Kushner

68. DO YOU READ COMIC BOOKS? yee and before you ask my fave is Deadpool

69. WHAT MAKES YOU THE MOST ANGRY? when people be on some bullshit

70. DO YOU PREFER TO READ ON AN ELECTRONIC DEVICE OR WITH A REAL BOOK? real book

71. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL? IN High School I loved history

72. DO YOU HAVE ANY SIBLINGS? one sister who is ten years older than I am

73. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU BOUGHT? ... iced coffee despite it being 30 degrees out

74. HOW TALL ARE YOU? 5′3

75. CAN YOU COOK? I’d like to think so. Wish I had a oven tho

76. WHAT ARE THREE THINGS THAT YOU LOVE? music, my family (sometimes) I’m trying to love myself so let’s throow that one in there

77. WHAT ARE THREE THINGS THAT YOU HATE? people who stroll/saunter, when people are on their bullshit, dark chocolate

78. DO YOU HAVE MORE FEMALE FRIENDS OR MORE MALE FRIENDS? male “friends”. But, I know a lot more girls that I keep up with more often.

79. WHAT IS YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION? lesbian

80. WHERE DO YOU CURRENTLY LIVE? Manhattan, Upper West Side

81. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TEXTED? Me mam

82. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? Thursday in my Theatre class but we were all crying so i’ll let it slide

83. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE YOUTUBER? i don’t really watch anyone consistently

84. DO YOU LIKE TO TAKE SELFIES? i do

85. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE APP? tinder

86. WHAT IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR PARENT(S) LIKE? prety solid i love them both even if my mom hates my sexuality and threatened locking me at home when i came out to herelol

87. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOREIGN ACCENT? italian

88. WHAT IS A PLACE THAT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO, BUT YOU WANT TO VISIT?Copenhagen! I’ve wanted to go to Denmark since I was ten

89. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER? 7

90. CAN YOU JUGGLE? Nah son

91. ARE YOU RELIGIOUS? defenitly a lot less than my story style insists lol. I do believe in God tho

92. DO YOU FIND OUTER SPACE OR THE DEEP OCEAN TO BE MORE INTERESTING? LOADED QUESTION BECAUSE I WANNA EXPLORE BOTH 

93. DO YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF TO BE A DAREDEVIL? ehhhhhhhh no

94. ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO ANYTHING? strawberries and some medicine that i can’t remember the name of

95. CAN YOU CURL YOUR TONGUE? yes i’m a lesbian it’s what we do

96. CAN YOU WIGGLE YOUR EARS? nah

97. HOW OFTEN DO YOU ADMIT THAT YOU WERE WRONG ABOUT SOMETHING? Literally anytime i’m wrong about soomething. I love being exposed, put in my place, roasted.

98. DO YOU PREFER THE FOREST OR THE BEACH? Forest so I can find my mans... my MOTH mans

99. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIECE OF ADVICE THAT ANYONE HAS EVER GIVEN YOU? you know what you want, don’t let your concerns get in the way of your ambitions

100. ARE YOU A GOOD LIAR? Yes

101. WHAT IS YOUR HOGWARTS HOUSE? Ravenclaw

102. DO YOU TALK TO YOURSELF? Deadass I talk to myself more often than otherpeople

103. ARE YOU AN INTROVERT OR AN EXTROVERT? introverted

104. DO YOU KEEP A JOURNAL/DIARY? yee

105. DO YOU BELIEVE IN SECOND CHANCES? I give everyone I can think of second chances because i’m a forgiving sone of a bitch and yet they continue TO BE ON SOME BULLSHIT

106. IF YOU FOUND A WALLET FULL OF MONEY ON THE GROUND, WHAT WOULD YOU DO? THat be mine i may be forgiving by moral compass be broke as hell and I haven’t eaten in like 3 days because i’m so broke

107. DO YOU BELIEVE THAT PEOPLE ARE CAPABLE OF CHANGE? When I’m answering this question for a job application i sure do

108. ARE YOU TICKLISH? tragicallu

109. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON A PLANE? yes

110. DO YOU HAVE ANY PIERCINGS? i have 5 holes in my ears and a nostreil piercing

111. WHAT FICTIONAL CHARACTER DO YOU WISH WAS REAL? Mark Cohen or LEO VALDEZ

112. DO YOU HAVE ANY TATTOOS? yes 2, one chest, one forearm. But that’s only because I don’t have money i need more

113. WHAT IS THE BEST DECISION THAT YOU’VE MADE IN YOUR LIFE SO FAR? move to new york

114. DO YOU BELIEVE IN KARMA? yes and she’s a bitch

115. DO YOU WEAR GLASSES OR CONTACTS? both

116. DO YOU WANT CHILDREN? eventually I feel like I would make a pretty solid kid

117. WHO IS THE SMARTEST PERSON YOU KNOW? my dad

118. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING MEMORY? Being high for three days straight

119. HAVE YOU EVER PULLED AN ALL-NIGHTER? i just finished pulling one

120. WHAT COLOR ARE MOST OF YOU CLOTHES? black as you can see by my simself  i really do dress pretty much only in black because i aged poorly out of my goth phase

121. DO YOU LIKE ADVENTURES? yeeee

122. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON TV? Yep, Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade, Trade Show stuff, probably for school or local news a few times

123. HOW OLD ARE YOU? 18

124. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE QUOTE? Know in your soul like your blood knows the way from your heart to your brain, know that you’re whole. - HEdwig and the Angry Inch

125. DO YOU PREFER SWEET OR SAVORY FOODS? This is a really boring last question but savory but if you made it this far i’ll expose myself a little more. I’m black and Jewish, I go to a performing arts Conservatory, and this took me so long to answer because I hooked up with someone in Brooklyn last night and i had trouble getting back to my dorm.

[megaparsecs]

this is just me writing about me and laras long gay metal gear fanfic

this is pretty silly but I'm like so nervous about posting the last chapter of the fanfic I've been working on with Lara for the past no joke almost two and a half years because it's like a silly really trope-y fanfic about a bad video game series but like, I've Grown A Lot during the process of writing it and my life has changed so drastically in so many ways during the process. It's taken two and a half years because the further we get in the editing process the more I drag my heels -- it's been like four months since we posted the penultimate chapter and the final chapter doesn't even need that much editing (just a lot of me regretting putting ppl texting each other in it)

ok im putting in a read more because predictably i went on forever. 

But it's weird, actually finishing something this long. And it's weird because I'm proud of it but it's like, a fan fiction, but I'm legit proud of it. And it's weird because like --- I write achronologically so parts of the last chapter I wrote over two years ago. The very last scene is one of the parts that's like, survived pretty much intact through the nine or ten different massive google docs we have. And parts of the last chapter are legitimately extremely important to me in a personal way and it's a fan fiction that's just 60k bad homestuck jokes and bad xfiles jokes and self indulgent recursive meta fiction. It's a story I continuously feel silly about because it's like, nice. I try very hard to make it a kind story, tho I gravitate by nature to being as grimdark as possible because if you write nice things about things you like then people know your vulnerabilities and thus how to destroy you etc. 

and also these awful video game characters are Important to me and Lara and I have a very particular vision of them that I think is different from a lot of peoples perception of them -- i of course simultaneously believe that 1. i am totally right about all of my interpretations and they are the most correct and 2. these are fictional characters that don’t exist as real people so many different interpretations of the characters are equally valid. so this whole fanfic is like, me pitching our iterations of these characters to other people, like, “hey. . . what if just, like, what if we all just sort of chilled out a little here, and thought up like, some nice stuff.”  and that’s important to me. 

and the fact that the characters i’m writing are able to form like, a healthy adult relationship --- that’s really really important to me, because like, not a lot of what i would consider healthy adult communicative supportive romantic relationships are portrayed in like, anything i read? certainly not in a lot of fanfic, certainly not in a lot of metal gear fanfic. which okay partially is because like half the protagonists in metal gear are awful people and the other half are written i would say “with dubious quality” by their original creators. but partially i have some Huge Issues with a lot of things. . . centered around metal gear. . . because i think there’s shit in metal gear that’s fun and interesting but there’s a lot of shit that like, we should all maybe just go ahead and consign to the trash heap. but that’s neither here nor there. 

anyway, a lot of writing this was also kind of figuring out what a healthy adult romantic relationship was, while also situating that in the context of like, other important friendships. i struggled a lot with not falling into some of the pitfalls i think fics like this (one centered around the main m/m couple in the fandom but one that also attempts to include a lot of female characters -- we’ll call it “the rosemary problem” and ya’ll probably will know what i mean) fall into, and i don’t think i always succeeded, but i think we did okay.  i don’t want to get into like Too Much Stuff about why that was so important to me at this particular point in my life because i have a huge difficulty like, sharing personal info about myself that i think reveals Weakness or something Silly, but yeah. i’ll probably end up writing about that anyway because i love to hear myself talk. 

literally like three of you have read our fanfic so this is a lot of bloviating about something i’ve spent way more time thinking about than like anyone else ever (save Lara), and so like, talking about what i wish i’d done better and what i’m really proud of in it isn’t like, really going to mean anything and i’m going to instead just make an insufferably long author’s note at the end of the final chapter.  i do feel Deeply Silly about something thats not original fiction being this Important to me and something that i treat this seriously, but i’m incapable of creating things without taking them very seriously, i put the exact same amount of effort into fanfic as i ever have into like, writing original fiction. and it’s important, and i created it with someone that i love so very very very much, and it’s a thing we made together so it’s always going to be very special to me, and i cannot fucking believe i put so many things that i’m going to have to format in the last chapter, thanks past me. 

[girlwithsword]

so i haven’t journaled in 2 weeks because i am a #mess and a lot of stuff has happened so i think broad summaries are more in order

basic themes: the summer, school, the next week, the house, ken, friends, family, my health

the summer: we had the group sicha for mosh madatz applicants and i had my interview with ari for the gilboa position, galil applications just came out

i don’t think i’m going to get mosh or gilboa - not ‘cause i’m not qualified, i am, but there just seems to be a lot of people more suited for that tafkid at those machanot than myself

galil is still open and idk as much what the landscape is like so it’s still a possibility, but idk what i’m going to to if i don’t get madatz madricha. i have been actively trying to separate what i want from the summer from the tafkid and i can’t do it. 

Hannah and Sarah have made a proposal for a kvutzah messima based on leading nachshonimot and I’m down with that, but Hannah think that i could just go to Galil and be with their bogrimot and do that and maybe i could but a) that still wouldn;t give me the tzevet experience i’m looking for b) i wouldnt have the time or freedom to build a tochnit and c) i do NOT want to be the person coming in to the summer, especially as an outsider, demanding to be with certain kids! That person sucks!

I’ve talked to Hannah and to Bekah about it and im trying to talk to the mads but if i don’t get madatz madricha it’s really hard to justify going to a new machaneh to be on tzevet ragil to myself and my mother, not when there is SO MUCH theatre over the summer

anyway we just had a kvutzah call about it - Hannah, Jess and Toviah are applying for MBI! Sara and Ari are thinking about gesher! but sara still only wants to come for one session? arron fine is applying for madatz at miriam and maybe gilboa but idk?

i do have an idea, that maybe if i don’t get madatz, i stay in the city, work in theatre over the summer and spend my free time facilitating the kvutzah. like everyone gets so busy and hyper focused over kayitz and i could be an eye in the sky, keeping everyone updated, helping people with resource gathering and editing peulot - i could still be involved while not missing a summer of opportunities

school: so things are a lot more overwhelming than i want them to be

‘cause i had a bad week at the end of january i feel behind and i still haven;t totally caught up and it’s coming to mid-semester and that’s gonna catch up with me

monologue study is a lot more work than i expected - just doing all the xfript work is taking much longer than i planned for - i /just/ finished making the Lists yesterday and I’ve been working on that for WEEKS. Luckily, we don’t actually have class this week so all that stuff is due after the break - unluckily, i can’t really do work over the break and that shit needs to get done - more on that later

however, my actual piece is looking really good and some of the warm ups and breathing exercises have helped so much! two classes ago we did these breath exercises and then went around and each said a central line from our pieces and i have never been so in the moment and real and in my breath than right then and now i have had a taste and want that always

we’ll be starting shakespeare after the break and i want to try something new, I love my Beatrice, but there is something to be said for repertoire building. Rosanna suggested looking into Rosalind  pieces from As You Like It and that’s promising. I might... try a Juliet? Like, idk if that’s worthwhile im just... not a Juiet, im never gonna be the ingenue, why try? but having something sweeter is definitely a goal, idk i looked at Rosalind pieces and i think there is something that catches my eye

scene study has a similar issue in that the written work is a lot more overwhelming and time consuming than i planned and that /is/ due next week so. however, rehearsals have been going AMAZING, we’re like 98% off book and have to focus on picking up the pace, sticking to tactics and not playing attitudes and getting the blocking a little more fine tuned. 

we had dress rehearsals tuesday and it was a WRECK. /no one/ was off book, a couple scenes were just /stopped/ midway through and everyone was off. then we went up, the only group who didn;t even once call for a line and who was actually on top of our shit. i admit, it felt kinda good to be the best. though, the bar was kinda low. 

I’m being mean, a lot of people had good moments and most of the scenes that derailed derailed ‘cause ONE particular person clearly didn;t have their shit together and it threw everyone off. 

Brandon and i rehearsed today and got pacing a little more down and he’s gonna come over sunday and do a final rehearsal before tuesday’s presentation!!

my elective has been a lot less interesting than i was hoping for, the classes are kinda boring but at least it’s pretty easy. HOWEVER, we did a field trip to city hall yesterday and THAT was fascinating! we got to sit in on the city council sessions as they were deciding the budget and it was! so! cool! that’s the room where it fucking happens. and like, we should all be more on top of local politics ‘cause that’s where the day to day shit gets figured out. i did a whole snapchat rant about it it’s good

fevergraph isn’t technically school but it’s been going really well - i got to get some emotional stuff out through the journeys and i’ve gotten my heart rate up a few times, last class is next week and i think i’m gonna look into maybe some voice lessons for the next half of the semester?

anyway: sunday i need to get all my fucking scene work done, monday i should record all my notes for my TOR midterm ‘cause tuesday im running around a lot and i need to study for that. monologue stuff will have to wait - that’ll be wednesday/thursday, cause thursday afternoon... i’m getting on a plane to israel

so, that’s happening. i kinda was just.., thinking about it.. and then jazz said that if i went she would go with me.. and then my parents said they’d give me 300 for the trip as a bday present.. and then i booked tickets. we’re still figuring out exact details in terms of where we’re staying when but i’ve e-mailed mona and paul and talia and the mads about it and we’re figuring it out

so, yeah... that’s happening. we’re gonna chill and see people and go read on the beach and i’m going to where nothing but dressed the whole time and i’m so fucking excited.

in the meantime, this week i have to get all this fucking work done, my birthday is this weekend!! (there’s gonna be cupcakes and whiskey and an entire afternoon of theatre!!!!) and we need to shove in ten thousand roommate interviews in there sometime

‘cause YEAH, updates on Murnau House: we still haven;t found a new person for the Room That Cannot Be Filled which is Annoying and the previous occupant has not been as ontop of finding a replacement as he said he would so Sam is leading the search, bless her

aaaand our fridge broke last week, again, and we lost a BUNCH of food, but due to my skills of being a polite and efficient BITCH thanks to my mum, we got a new one pretty quickly and that’s going fine.

the ken: we had a tubshvat carnival two weeks ago, some bogrimot came and volunteered, it went fine, but i wasnt as invested as i should’ve been - however, i did see Iris there!! whcih was nice, she’s gonna be chinuch at shomiria this summer and she did the habo/hashi birthright! very cool

then, sem. so, we had a tzevet of 7 for 40 kids, two of whom lefton the saturday night. aaron and yehuda of all people were on mitbach and the post mbiers were a big help. the schedule pretty much went out the window becuase we didn’t even get in till after midnight in friday due to the storm.

i did however get an entire busload of kids off the bus, to a rest stop and back on to the bus in FIFTEEN MINUTES ‘cause i’m amazing, we went to camp and the kids had fun even tho it was very Emotional for me, and we re focused on The Krinkle Project for messima, and even tho we didn;t do the vaad stuff i hoped for, i think we can move forward if i get my shit together enough. we also did kvutzah peulot that, even if they didn’t go /so/ great, i think brought important ideas and next steps into a lot of the kids minds about how to be stronger as a kvtzot

there was gonna be a katkateam this weekend but ido and i are both on vaccations so that’s been cancelled. there;s a purim party on the 5th that might launch our participation in Krinkle if we get that together. Mifgash with Tavor in March, spring sem in May, maybe one final event for messima and then... we’re done. at least. I am. I’m done. And I should be expecting a cheque from Shaul any day now.

friends: sima is interning on a CTV show and getting updates on the PM’s schedule in her work e-mail, and graduating soon

julia is kind’ve her usual mess but also starting to turn a profit in selling her embroideries on etsy, but idk if she has like a plan of any kind? and that worries me to a degree

mikki’s cosplay stuff is BOOMING and she’s back with Lou but... she’s still being kinda self destructive and i’m worried about her??

josh just finished a show and i haven;t talked to him in a while.... 

anna grace and natty are putting on a show that natty wrote!

i don’t ... have that many friends??

family: same pretty much. Alex is migrating in a month, they’re moving a little closer to me than i like but what can you do.

Batsheva was here, we had one of our Talks, i need to find a more permanent therapist to go deeper with once school is done. i should probably join a group... but that im where im at for as young as i am considering everything... im honestly on a pretty good track

my health: so, i doubt anyone is reading at this point so... the weekend after my fatigue flare up at the start of the month i had a suicidal episode. and i’ve only told my therapist

it was my first one in about a year, my worst one in two and over the dumbest thing since highschool .... just being overwhelmed by school work

like, two mays ago i had a really bad one ‘cause i couldn’t get myself to finish my Buddies piece, a year ago i had a much smaller one ‘cause of a HUGE fight with my dad and this was just... being overwhelmed.

and that’s what;s frustrating!! i guess it was frustration at my body and i hadnt eaten that well and i was a day away fro  my period and all that added up to curled into a ball trying desperately not to reach for a handful of my ciprilex and melatonin for most of that saturday??? which just like wtf

OTHER THAN THAT, my physical strength has actually been on an upswing since the start of the month and im feeling a lot more active. i have a cold this week but that’s just it being february and my immune system being shitty. thank god for cold 911

okay, it’s far too late. i gotta shower and sleep and this took about 10x longer than i planned for

it’s gonna be a hell of a week, and i have no idea when i can do this again, but wish me luck!