#edit ok i ignored it for now but if it was someone here for like a comm or something just resend it and ill accept
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Omg I’d die if you wrote something on Joel miller x younger bratty reader who he think sis a bad influence on Ellie!! Then they end up fucking really rough and angry but it’s so filthy and delicious?!?! Maybe he’s choking her to keep her quiet but she also wants to ride him and not give in!!! Like I love the switch up



RAISED WRONG.
summary: You’re younger, loud-mouthed, and definitely a bad influence on Ellie. Joel knows it. Won’t stop showing off, getting under his skin, acting like you’ve got nothing to lose. Then he drags you into the dark and finally does what he’s been dying to shuts you up with his hands and fucks you until you so deep.
pairings: joel miller x afab bratty!reader
warnings: 9k words. mature themes. unprotected p in v. age gap. rough sex. choking kink. manhandling. degradation kink. oral fixation. tit play / nipple play. breeding kink. smoking. read & consume responsibly.
note: first time writing joel hehe… i stayed up all night like a little vamp <3 like actually 2am to 8am. i don’t know what happened but it felt important. i’m really sleepy now and kind of stupid about it and now i’m so tired i could cry 🧍♀️ reblog or like if u did !! follow + send an ask if u want more (but i write so slow bc i have 1 braincell and it’s scared of me sorryyy) ok love u byeeee uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh 🫀 (As of 11 am on my time i noticed the fic was cut (the first half) so i edited it again and pasted it… i am sorry!)
They see you before you see them.
You’re half-crouched in a blown-out gas station, dragging one boot behind you as you sift through a collapsed aisle, rifling through broken shelves like you’re expecting a candy bar to fall into your hand. You’re just looking for something edible. Or shiny. Or stupid enough to add to your collection.
You don’t even clock the footsteps at first-maybe you do, but you’ve gotten good at ignoring shit. A click, a shuffle, the low weight of suspicion pressing into your spine. You only look up when a voice barks behind you, rough and already tired: “Turn around. Real slow.”
You sigh like someone just asked you to do something boring. Then you roll your eyes, glance back just enough for the smirk to rise.
“You lost or somethin’?”
The man doesn’t flinch. He doesn’t say anything either. Salt-and-pepper beard, jaw locked tight like he’s halfway to shooting. The kid next to him squints at you.
“She doesn’t look infected,” the girl says.
You raise your brows at that, scoffing as you turn, hands half-raised.
“Gee, thanks.”
“Where’s your group?” the man asks, voice sharp.
“Not here,” you reply, flat.
“That’s not an answer.”
You sigh again, this time more annoyed. “I came from that way,” you say, nodding vaguely over your shoulder. “It’s gone now. Fireflies, Fedra, raiders-take your fuckin’ pick.”
The woman beside him stiffens. “You see who did it?”
You snort. “Do I look like I stuck around to get names?”
The girl tugs on his arm. “Let her come. If she turns, I’ll stab her first.”
You laugh-sharp, surprised. “You’re fun.” She’s easy. You clock that immediately. Could probably talk her into anything.
“I’m right here,” the man mutters like it’s personal.
You take a slow step forward. He doesn’t flinch, but his jaw ticks hard.
“I’m not sick.” You lift your shirt just enough to show skin-clean, unbitten. “You can check. Or shoot me. Your call, old man.”
He glares.
The girl grins. “She could be useful.”
“She’s gonna be a pain in my ass.”
“Same thing,” you say, already walking like it’s settled.
You fall into step somewhere in the middle-not in front, not behind. Just out of reach. Feels like they’re circling you, but what can you do?
You walk for hours before the man-Joel, you overheard-finally says what’s clearly been stuck in his throat:
“You were with them?”
You glance sideways. “With whom?”
“Don’t play dumb.”
You smirk. “I’m not playing.”
He chews on the silence. Doesn’t push. Not yet.
Ellie-she never stops talking. She keeps throwing you glances, like she’s still figuring out what kind of weird you are. At one point, she asks if you’ve ever stayed in a hotel like the one you just passed.
“Does sleeping under one count?” you ask. “With a hole in the roof?”
She snorts. “You’re weird.”
“You’re loud.”
Joel clears his throat behind you. You grin.
That night, you crash in a half-flooded warehouse. Tess posts up by the doors. Joel plants himself between you and Ellie, arms crossed like a bouncer who never clocks out.
“You don’t trust me,” you say eventually.
“I don’t know you.”
Fair enough. You don’t trust him either. That’s just how it is out here-everyone’s a threat until they’re not.
“You could ask better questions.”
He doesn’t look at you. “You ever kill a man?”
You smile in the dark. “That’s the first thing you wanna know?”
Silence.
You shift slightly, one arm folded behind your head. “Do you think anyone out here hasn’t?”
Another pause. The air gets heavier.
“I didn’t shoot first,” you add. “Not the first time.”
He doesn’t respond. You can feel his eyes though-tracking, imagining, dissecting. The kind of man who chews on suspicion like it feeds him.
“Where’d you learn to shoot?” he asks, finally.
“Boyfriend,” you lie.
“Dead now?”
You grin up at the ceiling. “Aren’t they all?”
He doesn’t say anything else. And you fall asleep with that little echo in your head-you want people to think you’re dangerous. Not a warning. A memory.
The days start blurring after that. Joel watches you like you’re a bomb no one bothered to defuse. Like you might sprout claws or snap someone’s neck just to prove a point. Ellie’s warmer-she shares a busted pack of crackers with you that Joel clearly gave her, even if she pretends it was her idea. You blow a gum bubble in her face and she nearly chokes laughing. Joel glares.
You sneak into a warehouse on a dare and come back with rusted junk and a chain of dog tags you tuck into your shirt like they matter. Ellie finds fuckass nail polish in a med kit and paints your nails at camp. Joel mutters something under his breath about softness and being a bad influence.
“You’re just pissed ‘cause you forgot how to have fun.”
He storms off. You don’t know if it hit a nerve. You hope it did.
The next day, you teach Ellie how to flip her knife. How to spot tripwires. How to curse in a language she doesn’t know. She says it to Joel and he looks like he aged ten years in one second.
That night, you sneak her a cigarette. Okay. Maybe that one’s on you. She gags, calls it gross, then takes another drag just to prove she’s cool. You tell her she’s not. She flips you off.
Then Joel comes stomping back from patrol-and freezes the second he sees smoke curling from her lips. “You wanna tell me what the fuck this is?”
Ellie drops the cigarette like it’s radioactive.
You don’t even blink. Blow the last of the smoke toward the trees. “It was one drag.”
“She’s a teen.”
“And? You think the apocalypse waits for birthdays?”
He steps toward you, slow and sharp. Each step feels like a warning.
“You’re a bad fuckin’ influence.”
You smile. All teeth. Like you’re proud of it.
“Guess it’s a good thing you’re around to balance me out.”
He finds you ten minutes later, footsteps heavy, pissed off. Doesn’t say a word at first-just stares at you, jaw tight, like he still hasn’t decided whether to drag you back inside or leave you there to rot.
“Y’know,” he mutters finally, voice low like gravel, “you act like you wanna get left.”
You don’t look at him. Just tap the ash off your cigarette and watch it drift. “And you act like you still wear a badge.”
He scoffs. Doesn’t move. Just leans against the opposite wall with that arms-crossed stance like he’s about to book you for resisting arrest.
“You keep pushin’ her like that, she’s gonna get cocky. Gonna get hurt.”
“She’s smart,” you snap back, too fast, too sharp. “She’s not gonna break just ‘cause I taught her how to hold a knife.”
“She’s a kid.”
“She’s surviving.”
He glares. “You think you’re funny.”
You drag slowly. Blow smoke right past him into the dark. “No,” you say. “I think you’re scared.”
That shuts him up.
For a second, it’s just the buzz of bugs and the soft hiss of your cigarette burning down. You catch it, though-the way his jaw ticks. Like you hit something that shouldn’t be touched. Like fear’s the only thing he hasn’t figured out how to bury.
“Finish your smoke,” he says finally. “You’re takin’ second watch.”
Then he turns and disappears through the window again like you’re not worth the rest of the argument.
You wait until the cherry burns too close to your fingers. Let it sear, just a little. Something to bite down on.
When you crawl back inside, Ellie’s curled up against Tess, dead asleep. Joel’s posted by the door, arms folded, head tilted like maybe he’s dozing. He’s not.
You sit by the window. Pretend to keep watch. Try not to count the seconds.
Then you get bored.
His bag’s right there, half-zipped, practically asking for it. Sloppy.
You inch closer. Quiet as a shadow. Fingers ghost over the zipper, slow and deliberate. You feel it first-canvas, frayed at the edges. A roll of gauze. A folded-up map. Then something else. Thin. Glossy. Familiar weight. A photo. You start to pull.
And then, too fast, his hand clamps around your wrist like a trap snapping shut.
Your breath catches. Not from the pain, but from the heat of him suddenly there-his body close, his voice like a cut.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”
You don’t answer. Don’t move.
“Get up.”
Still frozen.
“Now.”
He doesn’t yank you or shout. He doesn’t have to. He knows he can't-not when people are sleeping and he doesn’t want to waste any energy on it. He just moves you, dragging you by the arm through the far doorway into the next room-what used to be an office, maybe, or a supply closet. But it looks fucked up now. The door creaks closed behind you. He presses you back against it, not rough, but firm. Angry. His jaw locked so tight it looks like it hurts. “You goin’ through my shit now?” he mutters. “You that fuckin’ stupid?”
Your lips part, words half-formed, but he leans in close before you can say a thing. It's making you feel claustrophobic, a little, because he's so close you can smell the smoke still clinging to your shirt, the sweat on his collar.
“You don’t touch my things,” he started. “You don’t go near that bag. You don’t-fuckin’... poke around like you're some kind of thief or a fucking spy.”
You stare up at him, eyes sharp despite the dark. You almost melt by his voice but you're more stubborn than him so you reason out. “You were asleep.”
“No, I wasn’t.” He’s still holding your wrist. His thumb presses into the bone just enough to remind you who’s stronger. Like he's trying to make a fucking point.
Too bad you're younger and more smug and have that false confidence in you. You smile, breathless. “Little jumpy for someone with nothing to hide.”
He lets go of you like it burns. Then steps back. Runs a hand through his hair, pacing once like he’s biting back every word he wants to scream. Like he wants to throw shit. When he turns back, the look in his eyes is wildfire barely leashed.
“You try that shit again,” he mutters, voice low and trembling with restraint, “and I swear to god, I’ll leave you behind.”
You just look at him. Head tilted to the side. That same bored, half-lidded stare that’s been pissing him off since the day he met you. And it’s not that you don’t take it seriously. It’s that he can’t tell if you do or not. If you’re bluffing. If you’re always bluffing. You don’t respond like he’s the one wasting time.
Joel steps closer. His boots scrape against broken tile and dirt and something in him snaps. Not loudly-nothing about this is loud. He looks at you in the eye. It’s something small, tight, and final. He's like trying to see something through it. A pressure point breaking. “You’re like a fuckin’ splinter,” he says, slow and seething. “Can’t pull you out. Can’t ignore you. Just-there. Every goddamn second. Buried so deep it’s driving me insane.”
You raise your brows, you hum like you acknowledge it but fear not, you are mocking the shit out of him. Still no smile, not this time. “So yank me out, old man. Or stop whining.”
Swear to god, he almost did something just because of that filthy mouth of yours. There’s something wild in his eyes now, something unspoken and filthy and so close to the edge it hums in the silence. One wrong move and he’s either going to drag you outside and leave you in the dirt or maybe finally pull the trigger.
But he slams his hand against the wall beside your head instead. Just once. Flat-palmed. Not like he's planning to punch it or you. Looks like he's trying to ground himself. It makes the drywall crack and rain dust down your shoulder, but you don’t flinch.
His face is close. His voice is rougher now, lower, cracked and hushed but absolutely fucking furious. “You think you’re tough. Think you’re smart. You don’t even know what you’re playing at.”
You lean in just slightly. Mouth near his ear. You almost want to lick it up just to push him more but you didn't, instead you say, “You’re the one playing.”
His hand closes around your throat. Not hard. Not fully. Not in the way he's going to kill you. Just there-pressing. Cautionary. Not enough to choke, but enough to warn. And fuck if your breath doesn’t hitch anyway. Not out of fear. Something hotter. Lower. He sees it. Feels it. That pulse kicking under his palm.
And you-so smug, so sick in the head, so you-you grin. Just a little. Like a fucking sick fuck. Like you are enjoying it. Just to piss him off more. Or maybe you really like it. Maybe.
Joel swears under his breath. It’s not anger anymore-it’s wrecked. Like he knows better but he’s already lost. “You wanna push me?” he asks. “Wanna see how far?”
You nod once. Calculated but teasing him. “Been trying. Is it working?”
His grip tightens. Your head hits the wall behind you-lightly, but it jolts. You smile again like you are just rage baiting him because you know he will it up. And then his mouth is right there, hovering, like he could bite or kiss or breathe fire. You don’t move. You don’t blink.
And then-nothing. He yanks his hand away. It almost makes you protest and whine. He turns. Paces once, twice, jaw clenched so hard it looks painful. His back’s to you now, like he can’t even look at you without-“Get some rest,” he says through his teeth. “Before I do something fucking stupid.”
You don’t move. Don’t speak. Just stare at the tight set of his shoulders, the twitch in his jaw, the way his fists flex like he’s picturing your throat in his palms. And then softly, you mutter, “You already do.”
That lands. His head tilts-not enough to look at you, just enough to make you feel it. The crack in his control. The split is right down the middle. But he's curious what you’re going to say.
“Taking me with you? Stupid,” you go on, voice lazy, thick with sleep and smoke. “Letting me stay? Again, stupid. Letting me close? Real fuckin’ stupid.” You take a step forward, slow as anything. “But you haven’t stopped me, have you? Haven’t thrown me out. Haven’t told me to go.”
He doesn’t move.
“Almost like you want me here,” you say, mouth twitching. You lick your lips and chuckle.
That’s when he turns. And it’s slow, heavy, deliberate. Like every inch of movement is a loaded threat. His eyes meet yours, hot and blazing. He doesn’t look tired anymore-he looks starving. “I should knock your teeth in,” he says.
You grin. “You’d miss ‘em.”
His hand fists your collar and yanks you forward so hard your back slams the wall, breath catching in your throat. You feel it made you out of character for a second. His thigh wedges between yours, keeping you pinned like he wants to hurt you with it. “Say another word,” he growls, “and I’ll make you swallow it.”
You exhale like a moan, all wide-eyed and wicked. Like the little brat you are, you say, “Please.”
His mouth crashes into yours, rough and clumsy and furious. You kiss him back like you’re trying to win. Hopefully him, but you already know that you already won him. He groans. You drag your nails down his side. You made sure your nails go dug and make him feel those little moon shapes. He hisses and bites your lip. He palms the back of your neck, presses his forehead to yours like he wants to drive you through the wall. You rock your hips against him, just enough to test the waters and he grabs your jaw so hard it aches.
“Keep quiet,” he mutters. “Or I’ll shut you up myself.”
You giggle. “Try me.”
He doesn’t laugh. Doesn’t move for a second, either. Just there and holding you. Just stares at you like he’s trying to see past your skin, past the grin curling your mouth, past every smartass thing you’ve said since the moment he met you. And then he does something worse than yelling. Something quieter.
He presses more, but it’s all weight and intention, jaw set tight, hands flexing like he’s deciding whether to grab you or walk away again. His hands are back on your throat before you can blink. Not tight, just like a moment ago. Not yet. Just resting there, rough palm to your pulse point, like he's about to tweak. “Still feel like giggling?” he says low, thumb brushing your jaw.
You grin wider. Because, of course, you do. You just have to keep running your mouth. “Yeah,” you whisper. “You gonna do something about it, or just keep standing there like you’re scared of me?”
He exhales through his nose. Frustrated. Starving. Like he hates that you’re getting to him again. Like he's been trying to control himself since the moment he saw you. Then his grip tightens- just enough to shut you up like he promised, just enough to feel the way your breath skips under his fingers.
His other hand catches your hip, walks you back from the wall close to the door till your ass hits the edge of the half-collapsed table behind you. It creaks under your weight, but he doesn’t let go.
You’re both quiet now. Breathing hard. Heat knotting thick between your bodies like it’s been waiting. Like it's boiling and ready to put in a coffee.
“You always this much of a pain in the ass?” he growls. His hand drops from your throat only to catch the flannel tied loose around your waist, yanking it like it personally offended him. Like he hates this little flannel always covering your waist or arms, depending on your mood. “What is this, huh?” he mutters, twisting the fabric in his fist like it’s just another excuse to keep you close. “Somethin’ to hide behind? Or you just like dressing like trouble?”
You smirk, lips swollen, eyes heavy. “Maybe I just like being grabbed.”
He lets out a breath that sounds like it hurts coming out of him. And then he pulls- hard enough to undo the knot and let the shirt fall open. He stared for a moment to see your body. The shape. His hands remain skimming your hips where your shorts ride up high, rough fingers brushing the waistband like he’s debating how far he’s willing to go. Spoiler: too far. Way too fucking far.
“You don’t listen,” he mutters, more to himself than to you, like he’s trying to justify the way his mouth finds your neck again, his hand already sliding low. Jesus, you can see the way he tried to control himself. To don't do shit, but you just keep pushing him.
You gasp, grip curling in the fabric of his shirt as your back hits the table harder this time. “You want me to stop?” you whisper, teeth grazing his ear, giving it a peck.
He chuckles darkly, low and bitter and close. Before his hand slips beneath your shirt slowly, unforgiving. Rough palm skimming over your ribs like he’s checking for something- damage, weakness, regret- but all he finds is heat.
You arch into it, just a little, just enough to be obvious, and the growl he lets out sounds like it got dragged out of his chest by force. So you tilt your head, mouth brushing his jaw. “What’s the matter?” you murmur, syrup-sweet and smug. “Been a long time, old man?” You almost laugh when you say that because you feel like it's accurate.
His hand freezes. Just for a second. Then he laughs- cold and low and not nice at all. “You got a death wish,” he says, dragging his fingers higher, over your bare stomach, up under your bra. Just staying there for a moment to see your reaction. “Or you think this is how you stay useful.”
You hum. “Is it working?”
He answers by biting the side of your neck. Hard. Just shy of bruising. He doesn't even care if it will mark. If people will see. If it will have an implication or a blunt message.
Your jacket’s still on, bunched around your shoulders, half-pinned beneath you. His other hand shoves it up roughly, exposing the top that’s clinging damp to your skin. You see him staring, especially at your chest, and smirking.
You make a soft, teasing noise- half moan, half mockery. “You gonna say thank you after?” you whisper, breath hitching as his thumb grazes your nipple through the fabric which made you hold your breath. “Or you just gonna grunt and roll off?” But he doesn’t answer. He just pushes your thighs apart like he’s done talking. You laugh, breathless. “No, please? No foreplay?”
His hands grip your hips like he’s about to rip you down the middle. “You want me to beg?” As if he's seriously going to consider it, going to beg for you.
You open your mouth- don’t even get the smartass comeback out before he lifts you. Hands under your thighs, dragging you up from the table. You gasp, startled. Arms clinging to his shoulders, legs locking around his waist on instinct. Like it's on the default settings.
And then he drops- not hard, not rough, just fast. He carries you down to the floor like he’s wrestled with the idea for too long and finally gave in. Like you weigh nothing. Like he doesn’t give a shit who hears anymore. Like he doesn't even give a shit if this will bring you to death. But he just settles between your legs, knees pressed into cold tile, your body open for him and still so fucking clothed.
Your jacket’s still on. Shirt too. So he shoves it up- not gently. Rucks the fabric under your arms, hand dragging up your stomach before he slips his fingers under the bra and pops it loose. You both know you can't not really hot naked in this fucked up building. The cups of your bra fall forward. Your nipples catch the cold air, already reacting and sensitive.
He groans. Low. Gutted. Like he’s actually mad it looks that good. Like it's the best feature on you. Like he's so fucking turned on. (He is, you can feel his hard on through his pants because he's so close to you.) Then his mouth is on you- hot and punishing. He sucks hard, open-mouthed and desperate, tongue dragging over one nipple, tongue swirling to it while his thumb teases the other. His stubble burns. You arch into it, gasping, and that only makes him rougher.
His hand moves to your shorts. Not yanked- unfastened. Careful, but still not slow. He undoes the button, lowers the zipper slowly like he wants to hear every inch of it give. Then he grabs both the denim and your panties and pulls, drags them in one go, halfway down your thighs with one bruising tug that knocks the breath out of you.
You feel the air hit between your legs. Feel him pause. He pulls back just long enough to look. Still can't get off from the way your chest look, eyes locked to yours- like he wants to see the second you realize how fucked you are. Then his hand is on his belt. Unbuckling fast. Jeans shoved down just enough to free himself, nothing more. Just his cock standing tall and proud.
He doesn’t even take them off. He just gets his hand under your thigh again, pushes your knee up, and presses into you. Guiding himself where he wants it. It's slow, thick, and unrelenting when he's testing it outside of your hole. He doesn’t kiss you. Doesn’t speak. Just shoves in one sharp, angry thrust that knocks the wind out of you when he finds the right moment to do so.
Your back arches clean off the floor. Almost freezes when you take him whole. Your body is adjusting to him. Your jacket twisted beneath you, thighs spread wide under the weight of him. You cry out before you can stop it, your hand flying up to grab at his shirt, and your hand holds it tightly.
He can't really blame you for reacting that way. He knows people aren't really active in doing this kind of activity considering what's happening around the world. He can even feel it. You're tight. God. “Shh,” he growls, already driving into you again, harder this time. “You wanna wake ‘em up?”
You bite your lip. Shakes your head. Try not to scream. He’s not giving you time, not giving you anything but the full, merciless length of him, over and over like he wants it to hurt. And it does. You feel it everywhere. Your spine, your ribs, and your jaw are from clenching so hard. “F-fuck,” you gasp. “This you bein’ careful? D-damn you.”
He slams deeper. Doesn’t answer. Making you feel more of him.
Your nails scrape down his stomach- just under his shirt, not gently- and he snaps. You just need to feel him. One hand flies to your throat, not choking hard, just enough to still you. Just enough to own you. “You keep runnin’ that fuckin’ mouth,” he mutters, “I’ll shut it for you.”
You giggle- wrecked and breathless, because even now you want to push him. You don't even know why it made you giggle, maybe it's the fact that he's hot? God. Maybe because you're just sick and enjoying it.
So he does squeeze a little harder. Makes your head spin just enough. Keeps fucking you through it, rough and fast and filthy like he’s mad he likes it this much. Like every thrust is another reason he should’ve left you behind. And god, you love it. You’re still half-dressed, your bra pushed up, shirt bunched at your collarbones, jacket riding your arms. You look like a fucking slut at this moment, the kind the looking for a quick fuck. While he got his jeans shoved down just enough and he doesn’t care about the rest- just fists the fabric of your shirt and keeps going, fucking you into the cold floor like it owes him something.
“You- fuck- you’re not gonna last,” you rasp, choking on your own grin. “Been too long for you, huh?” You tease him. You know that it's been too long. For you too. That's why it's making things better. You're tighter. He's eager. What a good combo. Surely it will be more enjoyable for him.
He growls- low in his chest, animal and mean- and suddenly his mouth is on you again, teeth dragging along the underside of your breast like it pisses him off how good you taste. He doesn’t ease up either- still thrusting, still punishing, grinding into you like it’s the last fuck he’ll ever get and he wants it etched into your bones.
His tongue flicks over your nipple, wet and hot, then he sucks hard- mouth working like he’s angry about it. Like he's getting something that's not there. Like he wants to ruin the way it makes you gasp. One hand braces beside your head again, the other gripping your hip, dragging you back into every brutal thrust. “You’re so fuckin’ stubborn,” he mutters against your skin. “Drives me goddamn insane.”
You laugh, breath hitching when he bites- hard enough to leave the shape of his teeth. “Yeah? Then shoot me, old man.”
He lifts his head, stares down at you, jaw clenched and eyes wild. The sweat on his brow is starting to drip. You’re both half-undressed, panting like animals, his hand tightening on your hip hard enough to bruise. “You think I won’t?” he grits out. “You make me wanna do all kinds of stupid shit.” Then he fucks into you even rougher. Like punishment. Like proof.
You moan- loud this time- and he slaps his palm over your mouth without thinking, silencing you with a glare. “Keep quiet,” he said. But you’re smiling under it. Smiling like you won. And he knows it. So he keeps going. Fucks you through the smile. Through the hand over your mouth. Through the anger in both your bodies like it’s all either of you has left.
Your teeth sink into his palm- hard. Not enough to break skin, but close. He jerks like he’s been shot, hips stuttering just enough to loosen his grip. You take your chance. Wrists snap up. Knees shift. And then with a grunt and a twist of your hips, you push him off, flipping him onto his back so fast it knocks the breath out of both of you. You have the strength to do it after all those survival skills you have.
He grunts as his spine hits the cracked floorboards, hands already catching your hips out of instinct- just as his cock slips free, thick and wet and twitching between you. “Jesus Christ,” he snarls, already half-rising like he’s gonna pin you again.
But you’re faster. You straddle him before he can do shit, jacket still on, tits out, sweat slick between your ribs. You drop your weight down just enough to let your slick cunt press against his length- not taking him in, not yet. Just grinding your slit to him slow, lazy, torturous, your ruined shorts halfway down your thighs. “Aw, what’s wrong?” you murmur, mocking sweetness. “Thought you said I was gonna make you do something stupid.”
He grabs your waist like he’s going to break it. But he doesn’t move. Doesn’t buck up. Just breathes- harsh and heavy, nostrils flaring, eyes locked on yours like he’s never hated anyone more in his life. Or wanted them this much. “You like bein’ a brat, huh?” he growls.
You rock your hips once. Just enough to drag your slick over his tip. Enough to feel him twitching. A whimper escapes him before he can swallow it. “Not a brat,” you whisper, grinning now. “Just figured you needed help finishing the job, old man.”
That does it. In one breathless move, he raises your hips before lining himself to you and he yanks you down, sheathing himself deep again- all the way, no warning, no grace. You gasp, head thrown back, spine bowing as he fills you. “Shut the fuck up,” he hisses, hands bruising on your hips. “And ride me.”
You brace your hands on his chest- hot and hard and heaving- and start moving. Slow. Torturous. Rolling your hips like it’s a fucking lap dance, like you’re not even really doing it for him. Just chasing your orgasm, dragging your wet cunt along his cock until he’s twitching inside you again, jaw clenched so tight it could crack.
He doesn’t speak. Not at first. Just watches you with that blown-out, murderous glare like he wants to kill you for making it feel this good. And that’s when you really start to talk. “Y’know,” you murmur, voice syrup-sweet, “I think you were full of shit. Back there. When you said you’d leave me behind.”
His hands tighten. Fingers digging into the soft of your waist like he’s warning you. But you just ride slower, deeper, grinding your clit against the base of him until your lashes flutter. He's so deep, you might think he's kissing your inside with his tip.
“I think you like the trouble,” you whisper, grinning now. “You like the mouth. The attitude. The fact I don’t listen.” You lean in, press your palms to the floor beside his head, and fuck down just right- his head thumps the wall behind him.
“I think you wake up pissed every morning ‘cause I’m still around. But you don’t send me away.” Your breath ghosts over his cheek. “You let me talk to her. You let me sit at your fire. You watch me all the fucking time.”
He doesn’t deny it. Just pants, breath flaring hot against your throat as his hands start to move again- one trailing up your side, the other gripping your ass hard enough to bruise.
“And now you’re letting me fuck you,” you laugh, breath catching as you rock your hips a little faster. “Face it, Joel. You’re gone. You’re fucking- ”
His hand clamps over your mouth again. Not rough this time. Just firm. Possessive. His other hand snakes into your hair, pulling your head back so you have to look him in the eyes. “Don’t say another word,” he growls. “Or I swear- ”
Your teeth graze his palm again. Not biting this time- just testing. You're licking it like you're making out with him while you're grinding and looking at his eyes.
He shudders. Then thrusts up into you hard enough to split you open again, growling through his teeth like he hates you for every word you’ve ever said.
Your tongue darts out, slow, shameless, as you lick a stripe across the center of his palm.
His whole body jerks. So you do it again. Sloppier this time, your eyes locked on his like you know exactly what you’re doing. You press few pecks before licking again. Like you want to see how much filth he can take before it breaks him. You drag your tongue up to the base of his fingers, then you move your hand from his palm and close your lips around two of them and suck. Like you're showing him how you'll suck him off. You licks the tip of his fingers before circling your tongue on it.
He groans- low and guttural, almost like pain- and drives up into you harder, faster, both hands flying to your hips now like he’s done letting you have any control at all.
“Jesus- fuckin’- Christ,” he grits, his thrusts turning brutal. “You’re- fuckin’- insane.”
You laugh, or try to, but it gets knocked right out of you with the next thrust. He’s fucking you now like it’s punishment, like it’s the only way to shut you up, to get even for every time you ran your mouth or disobeyed or looked him in the eye like he wasn’t the one holding the goddamn gun.
“Can’t stand you,” he snarls, but it’s hoarse, ruined. His eyes flick to your tits bouncing with every snap of his hips, to your mouth slick with spit and spitfire, to the soft bite-marks he left on your throat. “Goddamn- you feel like this?”
You moan into his shoulder, teeth sinking into the fabric of his shirt, barely able to breathe with the way he’s slamming up into you now, fucking through the grind of your hips until all you can do is take it. And you do. You take it like a fucking champ.
He palms your ass, pulls you down as he thrusts up, deeper than before, cruel and so fucking good it aches. “You think you can mouth off like that and still get away with it?” he growls into your neck. “Still ride me like you own it?”
Your voice is a whimper now, breaking under the rhythm. “M-maybe.” You whimpers and blush like his words make you feel shy.
“Yeah?” he spits, grabbing your throat- not choking, just holding. Just enough to make your eyes widen. “Then let’s see how long you last.” His hips don’t stop- not even for a second. He keeps fucking up into you from below, relentless, brutal, like he’s trying to mark you from the inside out. Maybe you like it. Maybe you feel something you shouldn't. Belonging. Claim. Butterflies. But his hand- his other hand- slides between your bodies, palm dragging up your belly until it finds your chest.
You gasp.
He grins. Mean. Doesn’t break pace. Just squeezes- rough, greedy- thumb swiping over your nipple like he wants to feel how raw it gets. You’re still in your shirt, still in your bra, both shoved up and out of the way, and he palms your tit like it’s something he earned. Like he’s entitled to it now. “Fuckin’ knew you’d feel good,” he mutters, voice dark and ragged. “Knew you’d break like this.”
You shudder, hips twitching from the overstimulation, but he grabs you- keeps you flush against his chest, keeps you there. He rolls your nipple between his fingers just as he thrusts up again, and the sound you make is more than a moan- it’s wrecked, wrecking, the kind of noise that feels dangerous to let slip. He likes that.
You can feel it in the way his mouth drags hot and heavy over your jaw, his teeth grazing your skin like he might bite again if you don’t behave. But he doesn’t stop touching you, doesn’t stop fucking into you, chest to chest like he wants to melt you down into him. You feel it first in his hands- tightening on your hips like he’s about to do something reckless. And he does.
He stops. Just for a second. Just long enough to let you feel it- his cock twitching inside you, your muscles clenching down in anticipation. He lets you sit there, suspended in heat and want, then thrusts up once- deep and sharp. Another, harder. And one more, just to watch your mouth fall open, your body jolt helplessly against him. “You think you’re in charge?” he breathes, smirking now. “Cute.”
And then he moves. Fast, brutal, smooth- his grip shifts, his weight rolls, and suddenly you’re on your back. Your shoulders hit the floor, thighs still wrapped around him, and he doesn’t waste a second. Slides right back into you, rough and steady, fucking you like he’s reclaiming something that was never yours to take. “Thought you had me, didn’t you?” he mutters, panting against your throat. “Fuckin’ brat.”
And then he’s pressing into you, hand splayed on your stomach like he wants to feel how deep he is. On the other hand, curling under your knee, pushing it higher to fold you open for him- give him more room to ruin you with every relentless, punishing thrust. He’s pounding into you now, no rhythm- just force. Like he’s trying to fuck the attitude out of you, like it’s the only language he knows. Like every thrust is another shut the fuck up he didn’t say out loud.
You whimper. Moan. Claw at his back like you’re trying to hold yourself together. And still- your mouth runs. “F-fuck- this is why you’re so uptight?” you gasp, voice cracking as he grinds in deeper, your words hitching on every thrust. “Could’ve just- ngh- jerked off like a normal person, Joel- ”
He grabs your thigh and slams into you hard enough to knock the breath out of you. “That's what you want?” he snarls, voice hot and fraying against your cheek. “Want me to shut you up with something down your throat next time?”
You shudder. Cry out. Legs jerking around his waist, holding him in without thinking. But you’re still grinning. Lip split. Teeth glinting. All nerve. “Y-you say that like- fuck- like there’s gonna be a next time.” That gets him. He groans, low and guttural, almost helpless, because you’re squeezing around him now- tight and soaked and fucking taunting him.
You’re breathless. Back arching off the floor. Body bouncing with every thrust- and still, somehow, your mouth won’t quit. “Y-you like this, huh?” you pant, half-laughing, half-moaning. “All that talk and you still can’t stop fucking me- ” Joel growls- deep and vicious- and his hand flies to your throat. Not choking. Just holding, just enough to pin you there, make you look at him.
“You don’t know when to stop,” he mutters, breath ragged. “Goddamn mouth on you…”
His hips grind in deeper, harder, meaner because he's most likely talking about himself when he said you don't know how fo stop. His other hand cups your chest, thumb dragging roughly over your nipple, and you gasp, arching up into it like you can’t help it.
But then you laugh again- wrecked and gleeful and cruel. “This is why you’re mad all the time?” you whisper. “Cause no one lets you fuck the fight outta them?”
That nearly breaks him. His jaw clenches. His thrusts stutter- hips grinding deep, punishing. And when you tilt your chin up like a dare, voice trembling but still sharp, he snaps. “God, you’re a fucking brat,” he growls.
Then he grabs your tits- both, rough and greedy, thumbs flicking over your nipples until your back bows clean off the floor. He pinches- hard- and watches your mouth drop open on a sound you try to swallow. “Uh-uh,” he mutters, dragging one palm up to your throat again, not squeezing, just holding- steady pressure that makes everything tighter, makes you throb. “No shutting up now. You wanted to talk? Talk.”
You whimper. One of those high, broken ones you didn’t mean to let out. He rolls your nipple between two fingers and fucks up into you again- slow this time, deep, cock dragging right over that spot that makes your thighs twitch. You gasp like it’s your first breath in minutes. “Thought so,” he says, low and mean and fucked-out. “All that mouth and now you can’t even finish a sentence.”
You’re blinking up at him, wrecked and twitching, your hands scrabbling uselessly at his wrists, not to stop him- just to touch something. His hands are everywhere- tits, throat, waist, like he can’t pick which part of you he needs to ruin more.
He leans in. Breath hot against your ear. “Look at you,” he mutters. “Fucked dumb already and I’m not even close.”
Then he thrusts, hard- one palm sliding back down to your chest, thumb circling one swollen nipple again just to watch your face twist. You bite your lip. You try so hard to be quiet. But it slips out anyway. The broken, breathy, please- like your body said it before your brain could.
And Joel just grins. Dark and awful and proud. You don’t even realize you’re shaking until his thumb brushes over your nipple again- slow this time, like he’s testing you, watching the way your hips buck just from that. “Sensitive, huh?” he mutters, dragging the pad of his finger over it again. “Figures. Got a mouth like yours, gotta be soft somewhere.”
Your lip trembles. You shake your head, try to glare- but it’s ruined by the way your breath hitches when he pinches.
He watches your reaction, eyes flicking down to your chest like he can’t help it, like it’s the only thing in the room worth looking at. His cock still deep inside you, barely moving, like he’s savoring the way you pulse around him every time he tweaks one of those pretty nipples.
“God, look at ‘em,” he breathes, thumb dragging across again. “Bouncing every time I move. Can’t even touch you without you fuckin’ whimpering.” You grit your teeth. Bite your lip. Anything not to give him the satisfaction of hearing you beg. So he pulls back. Slams in again. You sob. Just a little. “Yeah,” he grits. “Thought so. Not so smart now, huh?” He leans down- licks a stripe up your chest, then bites one nipple, hard enough to make you cry out, back arching straight into his mouth.
Your hands fly to his hair- grabbing, tugging, anything to ground yourself.
Your legs are trembling now, wrapped tight around his hips, your body working against you. You’re close. You can feel it.
And he knows. “Fuckin’ perfect,” he mutters, mouth still wet against your skin. “These tits… Christ. Could spend all night right here- just keep you pinned and pretty like this.”
You moan. Loud. Desperate. “Joel- ”
His mouth is still on you- sloppy, greedy, obsessed. Like he’s trying to memorize the shape of your tits with his tongue, dragging it in circles around your nipple until you’re twitching beneath him. His teeth graze again. Bite. Not enough to hurt, just enough to make you feel it. “Fuck,” he mutters, low and guttural, more to himself than you. “Soft little thing. Gonna ruin me.”
You whimper when he licks a stripe back up your breast, mouth settling over your nipple again like he can’t stop. His hand squeezes the other one, big palm rough over your skin, like he wants to know how heavy it feels, how full. “Gonna get even bigger, ain’t they?” he grits, voice hot against your chest. “One day. Round and heavy. Shit- dripping.”
Your whole body jolts. “W-what?”
He doesn’t answer. Just keeps sucking, deeper this time- harder- like he’s trying to coax something from you that’s not even there. Like it’s the end of the world and you’re his only vice left. “Bet you’d be so fuckin’ full,” he breathes, half-mad. “God, just the thought- ”
You whine. Head lolling back. Your thighs twitch, clenching around him without meaning to. “You like that?” he growls, rolling your nipple between two fingers while his cock grinds in deep. “Bet you’d keep me fed, huh? Tits all swollen, dripping warm down my fuckin’ throat…”
Your stomach flips. Heat rolls through your gut like molten honey. “Joel- shit- ”
“Yeah,” he rasps, finally dragging his mouth off your chest just to look at you- really look. “Wanna see you like that. All used up. Full for me. My girl.” You shiver. Clench down on him so tight his jaw locks.
And then he’s slamming back into you like he wants to fuck that whole idea into existence. Anchoring himself, as if he lets go, you’ll disappear. And he can’t have that. Not now. Not when you’re beneath him like this, fucked open and whimpering, tits flushed from his mouth, body made to take him. “Shit- gonna fill you up,” he rasps, voice shredded with heat. “Fuckin’- gonna take it, huh? Gonna keep it?”
You choke on your moan. He doesn’t stop moving. Doesn’t even give you time to think. Just keeps rutting into you, filthy and deep, his hips snapping like it’s instinct.
“You don’t even fuckin’ know,” he mutters- half-laugh, half-growl- as he presses you down harder into the floor. “You mouth off and push and act like you don’t need anyone, but this-this is what you’re made for.”
You whimper- legs twitching, heels digging into his back. He grabs your thigh again, pins it open, and spreads you wider.
“Bet you’d be perfect with my kid in you,” he grits. “Fuckin’ perfect. Swollen and sore and full- mine.” Your mouth falls open. No sound comes out just air, broken and helpless, because you feel it now. His weight of him. The size. The claim.
“You feel that?” he pants, grinding in deep, hips flush with yours. “That’s what you get for runnin’ your mouth. You want me this bad? You take it. You fuckin’ take all of it.”
You’re close. So close it aches. But he doesn’t let you tip over. Not yet.
His mouth returns to your chest, tongue dragging across your nipple like he owns it. He groans like a man half-feral. “Gonna watch ‘em get big. Heavy. Gonna fuck you slow when you’re full. Keep you wet all the time so it’s easy to slip in again.”
“Joel- p-please- ”
“Yeah, baby.” His voice is a growl, all pride and possession. “Gonna breed you right. Gonna fill you ‘til it sticks.” And then he fucks up hard, deep enough to bruise, and you break- eyes rolling back, body pulsing around him like your cunt knows exactly what he’s giving it.
He grits out a breath, baring his teeth like he’s proud of what he’s done to you. Like this is what he’s been waiting for. You twitch under him, clinging, whining, and he just smirks. “Yeah,” he mutters against your jaw, voice shredded and dark, “this is how you like it, huh? Can’t even fuck you unless everyone’s asleep- unless it’s fuckin’ nighttime and no one’s watching.”
You whimper, half-gone, still gasping as he grinds in slow, brutal, mean. He chuckles- mean. “Guess that’s when you’re the most behaved, huh? Quiet and needy. All that mouth, but only when the sun’s out.”
You bite your lip. He presses deeper. “Gonna start fuckin’ you every night. Every fuckin’ night I get to watch. When they’re sleepin’. When you’re already soft and tired and so fuckin’ wet for me you can’t talk back.” He drags his palm down your stomach- grips your thigh again, fingers bruising. “Bet you’ll start begging for it. Pretend like you hate it, but you’ll be waiting. Stayin’ up late just to get ruined.”
You’re shaking. Boneless. Fucked half-dumb. But your voice still works- barely. “Y-you always this chatty… after rawdogging someone into the floor?”
Joel just growls- laughs sharp through his teeth- and fucks into you again like punishment. He fucks into you harder- mean now, chest heaving, voice cracked open with heat. “Fuckin’ made for this,” he hisses. “Smart mouth, dumb fuckin’ body.”
You try to answer but can’t- you’re too full, too fucked out, just clinging to his shoulders while your back scrapes against the dirty floor. And he loves that. Loves that you’re quiet now. “So much attitude,” he pants, thrusts getting shorter, sharper, messier. “And for what? Huh? You talk all that shit, and here you are- takin’ me so deep I could fuckin’ mark your stomach.”
He palms it, broad hand splayed low over your belly, like he’s imagining it- imagining leaving something in you. “Bet you’d like that. Keepin’ it in all night. Walkin’ around full of it like it means somethin’.” You whimper. He grunts. “I’ll do it,” he breathes. “Next fuckin’ time. Not pullin’ out. Gonna leave it in make you sleep with it.”
Your body jerks under his, legs locking around his hips, and that does it- he snarls, pulls out fast, and fists himself hard, just once, twice, until he’s spilling across your stomach in hot, messy streaks.
He pants above you, jaw clenched, chest rising like he could still keep going if he wanted to. His cum drips down your skin, sticky and hot, glinting in the low light. And still- still- his voice doesn’t soften. “Next time,” he mutters darkly, thumb dragging through the mess on your belly, smearing it slowly. “You’re gonna keep it.”
You’re still panting when he touches your stomach- fingers dragging through the mess he left there like it means something. Like it should’ve gone deeper. He stares at it for a beat, jaw tight. Then wraps his hand around his cock again, still half-hard and twitching, and starts stroking- slow, rough pulls, using his own cum as slick.
You can feel him watching you. Watching the way you’re still shaking, legs parted, flushed and ruined, and not even trying to hide how much you want more. “Would’ve bred you if I fuckin’ could,” he mutters, voice low and bitter. “Would’ve filled you up for real.”
He sounds angry about it. Not at you- at himself. Like it kills him that he can’t. That's all he can do is make it look like it. And then he’s pushing back in. One filthy, forceful thrust- shoving all that comes back inside you like he’s trying to fake what he can’t have. Like he needs it to look real. Feel real.
You gasp, eyes going wide, body jolting under him. He groans into your neck, hips grinding with each deep, punishing thrust. “You feel that?” he breathes. “Messy and full- like you should’ve been. Like I should’ve done it.”
You whimper. Moan. Your whole body pulses like it believes him. But he just fucks you through it- slower now, meaner, desperate in a different way. Like he’s chasing the illusion of something permanent. Something that might’ve belonged to him, in another life.
You’re both still catching your breath. His cock’s still half-hard inside you, your thighs still trembling, your shirt pushed up and bra hanging off one arm like a war trophy. There’s sweat on your stomach, spit on your tits, and his come smeared in a messy stripe just under your navel like a goddamn signature.
And yet somehow- your brain resurfaces just enough to deliver one extremely cursed, extremely rational thought. “…We should probably find condoms,” you mumble.
Joel lifts his head- barely. Just enough to narrow his eyes at you like you’re the crazy one in this scenario, not the man who just rage-fucked you raw in a building full of sleeping people.
“I mean it,” you say, breath hitching when he shifts slightly, cock twitching inside you. “Like- I don’t think I’m trying to be someone’s mom in the apocalypse.”
He blinks at you. Still panting. Still buried inside. You keep going, because you’re annoying. Because you’re you.
“Couldn’t even get prenatal vitamins. Just a can of expired shits.”
“I’m serious,” you whisper, brushing your fingers through the come on your belly like you’re testing the viscosity of regret. “Next run- we’re raiding the pharmacy.”
Joel drags a hand down his face, mutters something that sounds suspiciously like “Jesus fuckin’ Christ.”
You tilt your head. “What? You don’t wanna be a daddy again?”
His only response is a grunt- and then he pulls out with a groan, wiping his hand roughly down your stomach like he’s trying to erase the evidence, except all it does is smear it worse. You sigh.
You both lie there for a second. Staring at the ceiling. Panting. Degrading in silence.
Then, finally, Joel mutters: “…We’ll look for condoms.”
𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟓© 𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒𝐎𝐅𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐍
𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐲𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐝
#musingsofheaven writings ♡#musingsofheaven asks 💌#writingblr#writeblr#the last of us#tlou hbo#tlou#joel tlou#joel miller#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller x y/n#joel miller x female reader#joel miller x f!reader#pedro pascal#pedro x reader#pedro x you#pedro pascal x reader#pedro pascal x you#pedro pascal x y/n#pedro pascal characters#pedro pascal tlou#smut#tlou smut#fiction#tlou fanfiction#tlou fic#tlou fandom#blurb#drabble
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"Wear the hat, ride the cowboy" Billy the Kid
Summary: After drawing the wrong kind of attention at the saloon, Billy comes to your rescue. Having to pretend to be his for the night, which leads to a ‘wear the hat, ride the cowboy’ situation ;)
Tags/warnings: mdni (18+), porn with no plot, angst, size kink, riding cock, overstimulation, fingering, breeding kink, creampie, unprotected sex, rough sex, dirty talk, slight knife kink
Note : This is my first time ever writing smut and I haven't edited it a lot so this should be fun. (Tell me if it's good or not pls)
tags: f!reader, smut
word count: 3.7k
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Curiosity led you to the local saloon one evening, where Billy often engaged in poker games. The air inside was thick with the smoky residue of cigars, and the occasional clinking of glasses underscored the distant melody of a forlorn piano. As you pushed through the creaking doors, your presence hung in the air, drawing the gaze of rough patrons whose eyes bore into you with a kind of familiarity you had never known. Unaccustomed to the bold gazes and suggestive comments that swirled around you like a threatening storm, you sought refuge at the bar. A man behind it was taking someone’s order.
You looked around, your eyes finally found Billy's familiar frame, surrounded by a haze of cigarette smoke, engaged in a high-stakes poker game.
“Hello, darlin’,” a drunken man stumbled toward you.
“Hello, sir,” you gave him a small smile, trying to avoid his intense stare.
He leaned against the bar to keep his balance. “Come on, darling, don’t be such a prude. Talk to me.” His hand reached up, attempting to caress your face.
From afar, you saw Billy, his eyes—usually mischievous and full of life—met yours with a fleeting recognition. Without uttering a word, he rose from his chair, his cowboy boots echoing a heavy cadence on the worn wooden floor.
The drunken man's intrusive advances persisted, his slurred words creating an uncomfortable tension. "Don’t play hard to get, honey. I can show you a good time," he insisted, his hand becoming more insistent. Ignoring the drunkard, you turned back to the bar, hoping for intervention. The man persisted, his persistence turning aggressive. As his hand encroached upon your personal space, a shadow fell over you.
Billy's presence loomed, his gaze colder than the steel of his revolver. Without a word, he grabbed the man's hand, his grip firm and unyielding. “Leave her alone," Billy's voice cut through the clamor of the saloon, his words echoing with a subtle menace.
The tension escalated, a palpable undercurrent surging through the room. The patrons, sensing the imminent storm, shifted uneasily. Billy's eyes held yours, a silent reassurance amid the brewing chaos. The drunk man, now confronted by the notorious gunslinger, stumbled backward, a mixture of recognition and fear contorting his expression. With a final warning glare from Billy, he slinked away into the crowd.
Billy turned towards you, his eyes softening as if to assure you that the storm had passed.
"What in the hell are ya doin’ here?", he murmured, his tone both gruff and concerned as he reached you, seizing your hand and guiding you to the quiet side of the room. "I needed to go out, Billy," you replied, your voice carrying a note of defiance and desperation.
He hissed, a trace of irritation etching lines across his rugged features. "You can’t. You gotta go home. These people here are dangerous," he warned.
"And you don’t think me leaving alone would be dangerous?" you shot back, your gaze a defiant challenge to the protective facade he wore like impenetrable armor.
"Shit," he conceded, his irritation mingling with a begrudging acceptance of your undeniable truth. "Alright, I’m finishing up my round, and then we can go," Billy relented, his tone an admission of defeat. "But you play along with me, ok? If they don’t think you're claimed, they'll see you as fair game," he said, his gaze locking onto yours with an intensity that cut through the smoky haze, demanding an unspoken oath.
“Ok,” you huffed out.
He pulled you towards his table with a rough yet oddly comforting grip, a silent acknowledgment that, for a fleeting moment, you were to be sheltered from the men surrounding you as long as you stayed with him. "Wait," he murmured, his hand lingering on yours. With a swift motion, he removed his hat, worn and weathered from a life on the precipice.
You extended your hand to stop him. "Billy, you can’t," you insisted, your voice barely more than a whisper, laden with the implications of his gesture. “You know what this means.”
"That’s the point," he declared, his crooked grin returning like a bittersweet promise of protection. As he placed his hat on your head, it became a proclamation, an unspoken claim made before the watchful eyes of everyone present, and a promise of a heated night that lingered in the air like an unspoken secret.
"Now, c’mere," he commanded, pulling you towards him as he settled into his chair, drawing you onto his lap. You bit on your lips, a mixture of anticipation and fear, the heat rising to your cheeks as the proximity between you tightened like a coiled spring. This was the first time Billy had been so close, and the magnetic pull of his presence ignited an unfamiliar fire within you.
He looked up at you as you bit your lips, his gaze a silent acknowledgment of the unspoken tension that hung thick in the air.
As he resumed his poker game, you felt his breath against your neck. "Pass me the whiskey, doll," he asked.
You leaned against the table, inadvertently pulling your hips tighter into his pelvis, sensing his hardness between you. His hands reached out against your hips, gripping you and keeping you still. "Careful," he warned against the shell of your ear, his breath raising goosebumps along your neck, a sensation that heightened the electrifying energy between you.
As you handed him the glass, he took a swig, and then, with a deliberate slowness, leaned down against the side of your neck, planting a lingering kiss. "Thank you, doll," his gravelly voice murmured, the aroma of whiskey lingering in the air.
Billy's fingers grazed lightly along your waist, sending a cascade of sensations through your body. His gaze met yours once more, a silent invitation lingering in his eyes. It was then that you became acutely aware of the speculative glances from the patrons, their curiosity fueled by the undeniable connection unfolding before them.
The weight of Billy's hat on your head felt like both a shield and a beacon, marking you as his amidst the prying eyes of the saloon.
The night passed on and as the final hand of poker concluded, Billy rose from his seat, still holding you close. "Wrapping it up for the night, boys. See ya tomorrow," he declared, his voice a mix of weariness and determination.
He grabbed your hand, guiding you out with a certain urgency. The saloon doors swung open, thrusting you back into the harsh glow of moonlight. As you stopped in front of his horse, he turned around and said, "What the hell were you thinking, coming here alone? You know how they treat women here."
His words cut through the night air, a mixture of concern and frustration etched on his rugged features. The distant sounds of revelry from the saloon formed a dissonant backdrop to the charged atmosphere between you.
You met his gaze, a swirl of emotions reflecting in his eyes. "I just wanted to have one free night, Billy. Just one," you replied, your voice carrying a note of desperation. Billy's jaw clenched, a silent acknowledgment of the dangers lurking in the shadows. "This ain't the place for that, especially not for someone like you," he muttered, his grip on your hand tightening as if to emphasize the point.
The weight of his words hung in the air, and for a moment, the world seemed to stand still. The moonlight cast shadows across his face, revealing the hardened resolve etched into his expression. "I can't have you wandering into places like this, doll," he continued, a trace of vulnerability underlying his gruff tone. "It's too damn dangerous."
Billy sighed, a heavy exhale that seemed to release the tension in the air. "Let's get you home," he said, his voice softened. With a final glance back at the saloon, you moved towards his horse. As you approached, he placed his hands on your hips, lifting you onto the horse with a gentle yet firm touch. You instinctively grabbed his forearm for support, your eyes locking in a shared moment of intimacy.
The ride home was a silent journey through the cool night air, the rhythmic hooves of the horse creating a steady cadence. You sat in front of Billy, the warmth of his body enveloping you, his strong arms encircling your waist as you traversed the dimly lit trails.
As the horse navigated the uneven terrain, Billy's embrace tightened slightly, offering both stability and reassurance. His chin rested on your shoulder, his warm breath tickling your neck, and in that intimate proximity, the weight of your unspoken desires lingered like an invisible thread weaving through the darkness.
Arriving at your doorstep, Billy helped you dismount, his touch lingering for a moment longer than necessary. Your eyes met, a complex tapestry of emotions woven between you. He spoke, his words a whisper carried away by the night breeze, "Be more careful, doll. This world ain't kind, especially to those with a heart as tender as yours." He placed his hand against your cheek, caressing it lovingly.
"Billy," you responded, the ache in your voice carrying a mixture of gratitude and longing. He placed a loving kiss on your forehead, his touch a hushed plea for silence. "Go to sleep, doll. I'll come by tomorrow morning," he whispered, giving you a kiss on the forehead, turning away.
"Billy, wait," an urgency surged within you, desperate to find a reason for him to stay. You took off your hat, intending to return it to him, a feeble attempt to anchor him in the moment. “Keep it. I prefer it on you,” he remarked, a bittersweet acknowledgment that stirred emotions too complex to unravel.
Locked in a gaze that spoke volumes, you inched toward him, a silent plea lingering in the air. As your fingers tightened around the hat, a palpable tension filled the space between you. His intense blue eyes held yours, revealing a tumult of unspoken struggles and desires. Your gaze shifted to his lips—slightly chapped yet irresistibly inviting.
Closing the distance, you reached him, and, without hesitation, pressed your lips against his. The kiss was a desperate plea, an attempt to convey the emotions that words couldn't capture.
Billy's initial surprise melted into a shared passion, and for a moment, the world around you faded. His arms encircled you, pulling you close as if trying to etch the moment into his memory. As the intensity deepened, you let go of the hat, your hands finding their way to his jaw, pulling him even closer. He tasted your soft lips and felt your warm skin. He pulled away slightly, breath mingling with yours, lips lingering, an anguished pause in the silent night.
"Fuck, doll," he groaned, your foreheads leaning against one another, his hands gripping the fabric on your waist. You looked up into his eyes, witnessing the inner battle reflected in his gaze as he grappled with the decision to restrain himself or not.
You approached your lips to his cheek, giving him a slight peck, when you heard him whisper, "Fuck it." His lips crashed to yours, hungry, hot, and demanding, stealing your breath in a heated rush. His hand came up, cupping your jaw, angling your head to deepen the kiss as he slicked his tongue inside your mouth.
“Come, let’s go inside, yeah?” He asked. You nodded at him, as he gave you a quick kiss, ushering you inside, “good girl.” And in an instant, he’s moving toward you, wrapping his arms around your body and pressing you to his chest. You press your lips to his and moan at the taste of Whiskey. His tongue slides over yours in slow strokes that make your cheeks warm, but it’s when his teeth nip at your bottom lip that a whine escapes.
His rough, calloused hands drop to the cusp of your neck, gripping your hair just tight enough to make you hiss. You arch into his touch as he starts to explore your body, mapping out every dip and curve.
“Billy- Please… do something.” He moans a response into your neck as his lips slip down to leave love bites along the column of your throat.
Eager to feel you, Billy tried to pull at the strings of your corset, but to no avail. It was too complicated to remove in the dark, and with the emotions aptly blinding him, Billy had no patience to try.
In the dark, you heard a flick of a knife, and you felt a cold tip of the blade against your skin before Billy’s voice comforted you, “Be a good girl and don’t move, ok?”
A rip ran through the air as Billy sliced your corset in half from the back. You stayed perfectly still, trusting him completely to cut the clothing off of you without harming you at all. The moment Billy had cut your corset, he dropped it to the floor and pulled your top off with it.
He immediately lets his hands drop to your breasts, nipples already pebbling from the cool air. He pinches and pulls at them for only a moment before he’s trailing kisses down your stomach.
Bilily stops just above your hip bones, “May I?” he asks, blue eyes peering up at you. “Yes. Billy, please.” You beg him, voice thick with desperation. He chuckles and then rubs his hand over your throbbing clit. He slides one, then two thick fingers into your dripping pussy. A whimper bubbles from your swollen lips as he pulls back to spit on your heat. His fingers curl, digits stretching and scissoring inside you. Your head feels like it’s spinning, arousal leaking from your cunt and down Billy’s fingers.
Your hips are unable to escape his assault on your g-spot when he pins you down, and you let out a moan you hardly recognize as your own. “Shit, you’re so wet.” His teeth catch his bottom lip as he smiles down at your fucked-out form.
Billy’s hand never slows, even as he grinds his palm into your poor clit. You cum not long after, waves of pleasure crashing over and drowning you in euphoria. Your body is trembling as you come back to Earth and Billy is there, watching you from between your thighs. He places a kiss on your sensitive clit before he stands back up, towering over you.
“Please. Fuck me, Billy.” You say through heavy breaths. He feels his head spin at the sound of your voice.
“Whatever you want, doll.”
Billy lays you across the couch and crawls over you, leaning back to release his aching cock from the confines of his pants. Saliva pools in your mouth at the sight of him, pre-cum drips from his flushed, red tip.
He fists his cock at the sight of you below him, lips parted and breasts heaving. Billy leans his body over yours, trapping you between him and the cushions below you. You can feel the muscle covering his torso press against your tummy. He ruts his cock through your pussy, the head catching on your clit deliciously. You both moan at the feeling and link your fingers together.
“Fuck, you’re so perfect. I’m gonna make you all mine”, Billy coos down at you, searching your face for any hesitance. You nod at him, earning you a keen smile and a quick kiss. “It’s gonna hurt, doll, I’m sorry.” Squeezing his hand, you hold your breath when he lines himself up with your entrance.
You gasp when his tip slips into you, already feeling like he’s split you in two. Salty tears start to well in your lash line at the burn of Billy’s cock stretching you out for the first time. He’s much bigger than you anticipated and you dig your nails into his skin.
“I know, I know. Just breathe.” He tries his best to comfort you, gritting his teeth at the feeling of your cunt around him. His heart stings at the sight of you crying for reasons other than pleasure, but he can’t help it when his hips buck, pushing himself another inch deeper.
Billy knows he should feel guilty for liking the way you screw your eyes shut, the way your cunt flutters around him even though he’d worked you open already. He’s not even halfway inside you and your legs are trembling around his waist while he holds himself back from pushing in balls-deep. He can’t help but feel a sense of pride swell in his chest at the effect he has on your body.
Billy’s hand leaves yours and drops to your clit, rubbing tight circles with his thumb. Your mouth opens into an “O” shape and your sloppy cunt grants him another inch. He can feel the velvet of your walls drawing him deeper, euphoria building in your veins. With every circle drawn, Billy pushes in further and further until he’s finally buried to the hilt. He stills for a moment, letting your cock-drunk mind play catchup with your body. “I’m gonna move, is that ok, doll?”
He pulls out, making you whine at the empty sensation, then, he’s driving his hips forward again. You loop your arms around his neck as he attacks your insides. Any words you have die on your tongue as Billy sets a rough, passionate pace. His tan skin, covered in old and new scars, feels slick against yours as his cock splits your mind in half. You can feel Billy everywhere, you can taste him, touch him, smell him, see him. He’s completely overwhelmed your senses and given you nothing to think about other than him.
The air around you is humid and thick, the scent of sex swimming through it. Billy slips in and out of you with ease, the clear strings of your slick and his pre-cum coat your pussy lips like a gloss. You let your gaze fall on him, watching how his brows furrow with concentration while he molds your insides into the shape of him.
Billy lifts your hips in the air to get an angle that allows him to hit even deeper, pumping his cock into you so hard that the air is forced from your lungs. There’s no one else you could want, no one else who could ever make you feel like this.
“Shit Billy. I’m so close.” You moan, a familiar warmth starting to coil in your tummy. He nods and slots his lips against yours for one final kiss. His tongue explores your mouth as his dick strikes your g-spot, sending you headfirst into bliss. You cum hard as every nerve in your body is set aflame. His hot, sticky cum floods your walls and leaks from around his cock.
Silence lies thick in the air aside from your heavy breathing and the soft kisses you share. Billy leans back to peer down at where you’re connected and shakes his head at you.
He picks you up and places you over his hips, leaning you back. “Can’t waste this, doll.” He tuts at you, gathering the cum leaking from your abused pussy on his tip and pushing it back in. Throwing an arm behind his head, a fucked-out grin crosses his features as you sink down on his cock, letting him rub against your most sensitive spots. A strangled moan sounds in the back of your throat as he slowly pushes back into the deepest parts of your cunt.
His tongue darts out to lick the sweat off of his cupid’s bow, large hands moving to slide down your hips to grab at the fat of your ass. He guides you up and down on him as you babble and cry.
“I’ve got you, doll.” His words send a shiver down your spine and you brace yourself on his broad shoulders. Your cunt flutters around him, “Fuck Billy’-” you cry out.
Billy groans at the sight of a white ring around his shaft, made from a mixture of his and your cum. “So tight… taking me so fuckin’ well.” He bucks his hips, tip grazing your g-spot just right, just enough to make your eyes roll up into your head. “C’mon, doll.”
He leans forward to press a kiss to your forehead, then captures your lips with his. He swallows every moan and hiccup as he pounds into you, only slowing when you clench impossibly tighter around him. Stars are dancing in your vision and pleasure is burning in your veins. You hear him swear again, he lets his head fall back onto the cushions and plants his boots flat on the floor. You nearly scream as he fucks back up into you. He’s growling something in your ear, but his words sound so far away.
“Cum on my cock, doll. C’mon, do it. Do it for me.” Billy babbles in your ear as he loses his rhythm, now just slamming his hips into yours with all the force he could muster. Your arms are clinging to his neck and he has you trapped against him. White, hot pleasure hits you like a ton of bricks as you squirm on Billy’s lap. His teeth sink into your shoulder as he pumps his hot, sticky cum into your womb.
He lays back on the couch, letting you rest against his chest. With a tender touch, he leaned down, pressing a soft kiss on the top of your hair. His lips lingered for a moment. As he pulled back, his fingers began to stroke your hair slowly, each caress a testament to the unspoken passion that simmered between you.
“From now on, that hat stays on you, doll. Let everyone in town see you belong to me."
send me billy thoughts or requests pleaseee :)
#billy the kid#billy the kid x reader#billy the kid smut#william bonney#coriolanus snow#tom blyth#wear the hat ride the cowboy#save a horse ride a cowboy
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Ghosted ~ Joaquín Torres
synopsis: you agreed to go on a blind date set up by a friend, only to be ghosted before he shows up with flowers and the most unusual explanation.
tw: fem!reader, limited use of y/n, reader has a brother, reader's old roommate died in a car accident, barely edited.
fic, ficlet, drabble, request
Guys, I am so sorry for this one. I've been on an angst kick, but at least there's a happy ending!
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Dating wasn't the easiest for you, you always seemed to have the worst luck. Which is why you agreed to go on a blind date, your friend swore up and down that this Joaquín was a good person. You wanted to believe her, you really did, but he didn't show up. You texted your friend, blowing her phone up while you stood outside in the spot that she told you he would be meeting you. You were outside the restaurant, watching other couples walk in happy, waiting on Joaquín to show up. You gave up on your friend, she kept telling you to wait a little more, so you texted your brother. Knowing that he would be able to make you feel a little bit better.
You left, not even bothering to get a taxi. You walked home, the click of your heels in tune with the fall of your tears. You ignored the influx of texts from your brother, telling you that some times people just aren't meant to meet.
You barely got into your apartment with the door closed before the first full sob broke through your body. You crumpled to the ground, you were tired of this. You just wanted to be loved, to have someone to come home to. It hasn't been the same since your roommate died, you felt like it was your fault. She wouldn't have been driving that night if you hadn't been out drinking with people, she wouldn't have had to pick you up. And she wouldn't have gotten hit while she was headed to you.
"Hello?" You barely answered your phone in time, your sobs drowning out your ringtone.
"Y/n, I am so sorry," your friend's voice broke through your haze and you sniffled. Your tears slowed and you picked yourself up off the ground, you kicked your shoes off and made your way to your bedroom.
"It's not your fault," you told her, walking into your bathroom to remove your running makeup.
"I just wanted to tell you, he has a reason to not show up, ok? He has your number and address now too, by the way," your friend told you and you dropped the cotton pad you were using to remove your eye shadow.
"What? Why would you give him my address?" You freaked.
"Trust me, ok? Just trust me," she hung up and you sighed, maybe she was just joking. This did seem like her kind of joke, you just continued to remove your makeup.
You left the bathroom, starting the music through your speakers placed around your house. You made your way through your apartment, changing into your pajamas, the shorts and tank top making you feel more comfortable than your dress. You sang along with your music, the comforting sounds of Hadestown making you feel better about the events of the night.
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You were in your kitchen chopping vegetables for dinner when there was a knock on your door, you glanced at your reflection in the mirror by your door when you passed, You grimaced at your red and puffy eyes, but opened the door nonetheless. You paused when you saw a man standing there in a green, grey, and brown suit holding flowers.
"Uh, hi?" You took a good look at his face and cringed when you realized that this was Joaquín, Joaquín Torres, or known as the Falcon.
"Hi, I'm sorry, I had to go on a mission a few days ago and was told I would be back in time. I clearly didn't, I landed only a few minutes ago. I flew here, hence the suit, I hope you don't mind I got your address from your friend and I got you flowers, oh I'll stop talking know," Joaquín stopped his ramble while you stood there in your pajamas with a shocked face.
"Would you like to come in?" You stepped aside and let Joaquín into your apartment. He walked in and took a look around the small part of your apartment he could see, you watched as he took a glance at the assortment of shoes sitting to his right and kicked his off. "I'm sorry, I changed when I got home. I could go change and we could go somewhere if you'd like," you shuffled past him and into your kitchen. You grabbed the knife you were using to chop the carrots when Joaquín walked in.
"What are you making?" He glanced around your kitchen and you looked over at him.
"Oh, fried rice. I have left over white rice from when my friend and I got take out a few days ago and thought it would be a good way to get rid of it," you shrugged, getting ready to put everything away.
"Sounds good, we could stay here. If you want," Joaquín quickly added the last part and you smiled.
"Sure, but aren't you uncomfortable in that?" You gestured to his suit before quickly taking the flowers still in his hand and quickly placing them in a vase.
"I'll be fine," he shrugged it off but you shook your head.
"Are you sure? I'm sure I have some of my brother's old clothes around that might fit you," you offered as you went back to chopping vegetables.
"If you're offering," he said it like he didn't want to intrude but you just shook you head in amusement before he took the knife to chop while you went to collect the clothes.
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You came back to him finishing the chopping and handed him the clothes. "I'm sorry but this is all I could fine, I hope that it's ok," you handed him a pair of grey sweatpants and a t-shirt that now that you took a better look at his physique, might be too small.
"It's perfect, thank you," he took the clothes and you pointed him in the direction of your extra bathroom. He came back a few moments later, his suit folded neatly in his hands. He placed it down on a chair as he watched you move around your kitchen making dinner. You glanced at him and almost dropped the spoon in your hand, the shirt was definitely too small but you couldn't find in in yourself to care. The shirt hugged him perfectly, you should see every curve of his muscles. You quickly looked away and made yourself busy with making dinner.
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Joaquín and you ate as you talked, you made a mental note to tell your friend thank you. The night might not have started the way you wanted, but you couldn't think of a better way to end it. Joaquín left close to midnight, giving you a kiss as he did. Your heart fluttered as you waved as he walked down the hallway and you closed the door. You stood with your back to it for a while before walking away from it. You passed your table but paused when something caught your eye, you walked over and saw he left his suit at your apartment with a note that was clearly written when he was changing since it was on the paper you kept in there just in case.
Now I have a reason to come back, keep it safe for me? - Joaquín Torres
You laughed as your eyes scanned the letter but decided to keep it safe until he came back, whether that was to see you or to get it for a mission. You didn't care, as long as he came back and saw you.
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Masterlist | Requests
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Hey so for Jude Bellingham can you write like Jude cheating on reader, he is very distant with her and she tries to make plans or asks him things like how has ur day been but he either just gives her blunt replies or just completely ignores her. Reader finds out he cheated on her via his phone and she confronts him and she admits it. Then reader leaves him and moves on with someone else (not a footballer just someone random) and Jude regrets what he has done but it is too late. Like pure angst and please make it long! Thank you!
A/n: the timeline on this doesn’t really work but just ignore that
Part 2
Sitting in a restaurant alone waiting for someone to show up is embarrassing. It's even more embarrassing when people know who your boyfriend is and are very clearly judging you and thinking about what might be going on in your personal life. Then the most embarrassing part of it all is having to leave after sitting there for an hour.
No text no call and no answer. After getting home from the restaurant I stayed up for as long as possible to try and wait for Jude to come home so I could ask him why he didn't show up to the date he planned and invited me on but by 3am he still wasn't home. The next morning he wasn't in bed but he had clearly been home and then left for training but he still hadn't even read the texts I sent him last night. He did post on his Instagram story which explained where he was, he was at a party with all of his friends. I'd love to say that's the first time he's done this but it isn't in fact he's done it countless times in the last few months.
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Valentine's Day
Two hours ago I got ready in a cute dress and did my makeup ready to go out to dinner with Jude. He's been so busy recently so we haven't spent much time together but he promised me we'd spend Valentine's Day together, he got us a reservation at my favourite restaurant and told me to dress up. That's exactly what I did now I'm sat here still waiting for him to get home two hours after when he said he'd be home.
It hurts to be left just waiting I was looking forward to tonight and getting to spend some time together as I've missed having him around. He made this move to Madrid out to be the best thing for us but ever since things just haven't been the same. He's always busy and when he's not he chooses to spend time with his teammates instead which I understand but at the same time he's neglecting me and our relationship. I tried to bring this up but he shut me down and promised to spend more time with me which is how we ended up with this date but clearly it's not that important to him.
Close to 3 hours later Jude finally came home and looked at me incredibly confused when he saw me all dressed up.
"Where are you going?" He asked
"On a date with you remember you said we would go out for dinner because it's Valentine's Day" I said
"I'm so sorry baby I completely forgot this week has been crazy I promise I'll make it up to you another day but I'm so tired is a movie night instead ok" he said
"Yeah its ok" I lied
Birthday
As always I woke up to an empty bed and Jude having left for training. Today isn't any normal day though it's my birthday so all my friends are coming over and we are going to go out for lunch together then hopefully Jude and I can do something together this evening even if it's just watching something together on the sofa. When I grabbed my phone from my bedside table I had loads of messages from friends and family wishing me a happy birthday and my social media was filled with edits done by Jude's fans which were all so sweet. The only notable missing thing was a text from Jude but that's ok he might've been running late and forgot.
I forgot about Jude as soon as my friends arrived as they all spoiled me far too much but I had so much fun with them. It was nice to be distracted from real life and stop worrying about when Jude will be home, if he will remember it's my birthday or if he still cares about me at all. Once I got back home Jude's car was already in the driveway so I smiled and happily made my way inside to see him. I wasn't expecting Vini and Eduardo to be over but there they were sat on the sofa playing video games with Jude.
"Hey y/n happy birthday" Vini said
"I didn't realise it was your birthday Jude didn't mention it but happy birthday" Eduardo said
"Thanks guys" I said
"Where have you been babe?" Jude asked still not saying happy birthday
"I was with my friends they took me to lunch" I said
"That sounds fun" Jude said going right back to his game
His friends tried to leave saying he should spend time with me but he said it was fine and that I wouldn't mind so they stayed. While they all sat down stairs having more fun than I was I did some work with tears streaming down my face. My own boyfriend doesn't care about my birthday his teammates cared more than he did.
Anniversary
"Happy anniversary love" I said when I found Jude in the kitchen this morning
"Happy anniversary" he said
I tried to give him a kiss but he dodged it and went to start packing his things as he has an away game later today so he's leaving soon.
"I'm sorry baby I've got to go I'll see you later though" he said as he left leaving me all alone yet again
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Today is a day I always like to forget. Both of my parents died in a car accident two years ago today so it's always an emotional day for me and my siblings, we would like to spend it together to distract ourselves but as I'm in Madrid we can't do that. Instead my friends invited themselves over so that I'd have someone with me which made me feel so much better. They came over early so early that Jude was still here as he hadn't left for training yet. He was doing his own thing as the girls all sat with me and let me get out all my emotions now by telling them memories I have with my parents.
"You know they'd be so proud of you" one of my friends said
"I just wish they were here to see all the things me and my siblings have done all thanks to their constant encouragement" I sniffled tears still falling down my face
"Why are you crying babe?" Jude asked as he walked down the stairs
"Just thinking about my parents it's the anniversary of their death so I'm just a bit emotional" I said
"I'm glad the girls are here to make you feel better then I'll see you later ok" he said
With that he left and my friends all looked at me with an expression I didn't quite understand.
"How long has he been like that?" My best friend asked
"Like what" I questioned
"Like you don't matter he didn't even hug you before he left even after you told him why you were upset which he should know anyway dates like this are important for partners to remember" she said
"I mean it's been a good few months he missed our Valentine's Day dinner he didn't wish me a happy birthday until like 5pm and we didn't do anything on our anniversary" I said finally thinking about how badly he's been treating me
"Girl he doesn't deserve you he's taking you for granted and you don't deserve that" one of the girls said
"I hate to say this but you need to break up with him clearly he's given up on your relationship and now I might be wrong but wrong but it seems to me like he's found someone else" another said
They were right for months now I've been at the bottom of his priority list and he's nowhere near the Jude I used to know and love. There is no affection there anymore it's like the love we once had is gone. He also has definitely been distant and he's never home so there is a possibility that he could be cheating on me. That's a thought that I'd put in the back of my mind and didn't want to think about but now that someone else that has mentioned it I can't let the thought go. Whether he's cheating or not things definitely aren't how they used to be and I need to get out of this relationship before it's too late. The girls all offered their support and said I can stay with them for as long as I need which gave me the confidence to actually talk to Jude later today.
When Jude arrived home all the girls left and they wished me good luck which I definitely need as I'm nervous to actually have this conversation even though it needs to be done. Jude went straight to get in the shower so I decided to look at his phone because he told me the password but I have never used it as I trusted him at least until now. It took just seconds of looking for me to find texts between him and this one girl who he had clearly been seeing for months now. He kept saying he would break up with me but the time wasn't right yet and that he wasn't in love with me anymore which hurt to see. I wanted to cry but I held back my tears and instead just sent myself screenshots of everything and then deleted the evidence so he wouldn't know that I knew.
After his shower Jude took ages to come back downstairs but when he finally did he was looking at his phone and smiling it made me wonder if he was talking to her the girl he'd apparently fallen for. He quickly noticed me staring at him and he just stared back not having a clue what was going on.
"Jude we need to talk" I said
"Oh ok is everything alright?" He asked
"I'm just gong to say it I know what you've been doing and don't lie to me I have screenshots I just want to know when you fell out of love and why you did this instead of just ending things" I said barely holding back tears
"I don't know it all just happened I'm sorry I should've handled this better I didn't want to hurt you but clearly I haven't done a good job of that" he said
"Yeah you really have hurt me I should've known when you forgot about our valentines reservations but I was foolish and believed that you were just busy now I know you were with another girl" I said
"I'm sorry" he said
"I don't believe you Jude if you were sorry you wouldn't have let this go on for so long it's safe to say we are over I wish you well but please don't try and contact me again I need to just move on" I said
With that I gathered my things and just left. I left my key, the memories and what felt like half my heart but it had to be done I had to get out of there before I got hurt any more. It's time to move on and start a new life with people around me who truly care about me.
~~~~~~~~~~
1 year later
"Come on amor let's go" Carlos called from downstairs
"Coming" I said running down the stairs
"Oh wow you look gorgeous" Carlos said
"Thank you you look good too" I said
He kissed my cheek and grabbed my hand so we could head out to the car that was outside to pick us up. Just a few days ago Carlos won the French open so we are going out to celebrate. I met Carlos not long after I broke up with Jude I wasn't even looking to date but I just happened to meet him on a night out with my friends and we just clicked. He understood that I wasn't ready to date properly but he didn't give up on me so when I was ready we went on a date and the rest is history. My plan definitely wasn't to date another athlete in fact I wanted to just have a normal life and date a normal guy but I couldn't just let Carlos go and I'm glad I didn't. We have been together officially for 6 months now and they have been the best 6 months of my life he always treats me right and he makes it known how much he loves me.
Carlos has a lot of friends in Madrid so he decided to come here and celebrate his win with me and my friends as well as his before he goes back home to be with his family. There wasn't really any time to prepare anything so we are all just meeting at a club in town that isn't just open to the public so there shouldn't be lots of people there. All our friends were already there when we arrived as we got caught in a bit of traffic but they didn't seem to mind our lateness they congratulated Carlos on his win and we all went inside.
As we walked down the stairs all my friends turned to me at once and I wondered what was going on for a second until I saw what they had seen. Jude was right there along with a few of his teammates. I haven't seen him since our breakup which is somewhat of a miracle seeing as I still live and work in Madrid and he has become part of the city. I knew one day we'd meet again I was just hoping it wouldn't be in a day like today I don't want to be thinking about him or to talk to him while celebrating Carlos as tonight shouldn't be about me or my past relationship. Carlos knows everything that happened so once he saw Jude his hand reached for mine and he gave it a comforting squeeze which made me feel a little bit better. The thing is I don't miss Jude at all I'm so much happier now but what he did still hurts me so seeing him for the first time since is a bit painful.
"We can go somewhere else if you want" Carlos said
"No it's ok tonight is your night plus he shouldn't affect my life now that's the past you are my present and future" I said
"Ok as long as you're sure but you are sticking by my side all night" he said
Jude's POV
"Is that y/n?" Vini asked
Him saying that caught my attention so I looked in the same direction as him and there she was with all her friends and a guy by her side. I recognised the guy as Carlos Alcaraz the tennis player who just won the French open and a the guy y/n has been dating for at least the last few months. I found that out when late at night after we lost a big game I stalked her Instagram and saw a photo of them together on her private account that she forgot to remove me from. Since that night I have kept an eye on her Instagram I usually check it at least once a week to see what she's been doing and how happy she is without me.
Since the night that she broke up with me I regretted making all the dumb choices I made that led to that point. Within days I broke things off with the other girl I was seeing and I have been alone ever since I just can't bring myself to see anyone else because they aren't y/n. It sounds stupid because I'm the one that ruined everything I'm the reason she's with Carlos and not me but she was the one I just didn't realise how much I loved her until she was gone. My mum has always told me not to take things for granted as once they are gone you'll realise their true value and that's exactly what I did with y/n I didn't realise just how important she was to me until I made some stupid decisions and let her go.
I watched her with Carlos for a while and she seemed genuinely happy which made me realise that she hadn't been that happy with me for a long while before we broke up. It was clear to see that she loved him and I could tell that he loved her too because he looked at her the way I did when we first got together. It hurt to see her so happy with someone else because I know I could've had that but now I won't get to share any moment like that with her ever again. I deserve everything that has come to me I made bad choices and as much as I regret them now it won't change anything.
I have to let her go because for her to be happy I need to not be in her life as much as that hurts. They say if you love her let her go and that's what I need to do let the one go because as much as she might've been the one for me I'm not the one for her.
#jude bellingham x reader#jude bellingham imagine#jude bellingham imagines#jude bellingham#football imagine
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Oh boy time to yap about Smitten again (and maybe adding an addition towards the already existing posts I’ve already had of him)
Ahhh Smitten Smitten Smitten you love sick fool /aff
How you get him is through seeing the Princess as a completely harmless person. So far, you and the Princess are the only two people you know are there in the construct, so of course you would feel an attachment towards her. Smitten is the same way, as you are now in a place completely unfamiliar to you, with zero memory of who you were before you got here, and was thrust into a situation with a huge responsibility over your shoulders, alone and afraid, and all of a sudden there is a Princess for you to interact with, and she is also nice??? Of course Smitten is gonna fawn all over her, since she’s the only thing that is familiar in this weird place.
Unlike Skeptic, who grounds himself in reality, Smitten uses a fantasy to keep himself going, which is the classic fairytale of a brave hero saving a Princess from her unfair imprisonment from the vile villain that is the Narrator. He keeps his own head in the clouds that he and the Princess were supposed to be in love and be free to live happily ever after somewhere out there, so when the Princess is dead in some way, like in Burned Grey, he goes baths!t insane, since the anchor that keeps him from going nuts is now gone. The story is off script.
Both Smitten and Skeptic wants some sort of control over a situation that seems to be uncontrollable, and the both of them went completely opposite ways of grounding themself.
(Skep and Smit are a classic duo of Realism vs Fantasy, with Cold and Paranoid being present at the middle of it all (the Greys vs Cage+HEA), but that’s a different post for another time)
Smitten devotes himself towards the Princess in all of the routes. He says it’s out of love, but is it really? It feels more of an obligation than anything. Perhaps, yes, he does feel some sort of love and attraction towards the Princess, but that is probably just a part of a lot of complex feelings of the situation that he’s been thrust into. Love, in of itself, is something where you would love someone regardless of their flaws. Smitten however, blindly accepts and fawn over every Princess variation, even the ones that are actively harming him such as Razor and MOC. He remains steadfast in his devotion. He wants to please the Princess and make her happy in any way, because she’s the only thing that have ever made any sense. Therefore, he has to make her happy. She has to be happy. She has to. If she hates him, it’s all over for him. He can’t ground himself anymore.
(Also a bit of a tangent but the way Damsel was formed was probably extremely traumatic for the poor Soft Princess. Like. She literally has to stab and kill the only person who’s been nice to her. For Sharp Princess yeah she’d be ok with killing you, but Soft???? That fu@ked her up badly)
(Edited to have this cause I have a stupid idea. Ignore this)

#slay the princess#black tabby games#stp#stp voices#slay the princess insight#voice of the smitten#stp voice of the smitten#stp smitten#mild mentions of#stp voice of the skeptic#voice of the skeptic#stp skeptic#stp the damsel#stp damsel#stp the princess#stp princess
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May I have a Chessy x reader slow burn then against the wall smut? I'm a sucker for both to be quite honest.
Hi Anon! Thank you for the prompt and I hope I delivered on the slow burn and the smut enough for you! Not edited in the slightest and I hope you like it!
On another note: I got another Chessy prompt yesterday so I'll see if I'm able to finish it before the New Year! Also I didn't specifically describe this about reader but I pictured her being taller than Chessy. I am not taller than Lisa, I'm 5'1, which is why I usually make reader shorter.
A Vineyard Crush
Warnings: Smut, Angst
Words: 9.1K (Enjoy)
You just got hired as a gardener at the Parker’s ranch and Nick Parker himself is giving you a tour of the ranch.
“So once the grapes are picked then they go down here where they get inspected again and then turned into wine.” Nick says as he shows you the basement. “So that’s the places you’ll need to know for work, any questions?” He asks as you walk back to the field. You’re about to shake your head when you see a woman appear at the front door and you can’t help but stare a bit.
“Who’s that?” You ask and point to her, Nick looks to where you’re pointing.
“Oh that’s Chessy, she’s the live-in nanny that helps me raise my daughter and keeps the house running.
“You have a daughter?” You ask and he nods.
“Ya but she just left for camp yesterday and won’t be back for a month.” He tells you and you nod.
“Ok, when do I start?” You ask him and he smiles.
“Right now.” He says and he calls someone over. A man walks towards you both and looks at Nick. “Kyle, this is Y/n. I just hired her and she needs someone to show her how things are done.” He tells him and Kyle nods before Nick walks to the house.
“Ok, so come with me and I’ll show you everything we have to do.” He tells you and you follow him to the grapes. On your way there, you stare at Chessy again and can’t help but be entranced by her.
The next day you’re checking the grapes while Kyle watches and you see Chessy walk out and you turn slightly to glance at her.
“Do you need a break?” You hear and you snap out of your staring and look at Kyle.
“What?” You ask him.
“Do you need a break? I’m guessing you’re not used to working in the heat all day.” He says and you nod.
“Ya a small break would actually be nice.” You tell him and you go get your water bottle from the cooler. “What do you know about her? I think Nick said her name was Chessy.” You ask him and he looks at her.
“I don’t know much actually. She doesn’t go outside much unless it’s to walk Sammy and she doesn’t talk a lot.” He says.
“Who’s Sammy?”
“Their golden retriever, he’s a sweetheart of a dog.” He tells you. “All I know is she takes care of Hallie, Nick’s daughter, and she’s also the cook and she cleans the house.” He says to you and you look at Chessy.
The following day you’re picking grapes when you hear barking and then you see Sammy running up to you. He stops in front of you and then you give him a few pets and then you hear someone calling him and you look up to see her running towards you.
“Sammy!” She yells and Sammy ignores her and demands more pets from you. “Sorry about that, he usually doesn’t run up to people like this.” She says to you with a smile and you smile back at her.
“Oh it’s not a problem, he’s so sweet and cute.” You tell her and Sammy wags his tail.
“He’s sweet until he runs to total strangers to get away from the bath.” She jokes and you laugh. “Are you new? I haven’t seen you before.” She asks you and you nod.
“Ya, it’s only my third day.” You tell her as you stand up straight to look at her.
“Well it’s nice to meet you, I’m Chessy.” She says and holds out a hand to shake, you immediately shake her hand and you feel her incredibly soft hands.
“I’m Y/n. Sorry but your hands are so soft, what’s your skin routine?” You ask and then mentally facepalm for asking a stupid question but then you hear her laugh.
“Well thank you and I actually don’t have any routine other than using body lotion every night before bed.” She says with a smile and you stare at her the entire time until Sammy barks. “Well I gotta get this mister into the bath so he has time to dry off before the sun goes down.” She says and holds on to Sammy’s collar. “I’ll see you around.” She tells you.
“Ya, well I work here so I guess you will.” You joke and she smiles before walking Sammy back into the house.
The two of you didn’t speak again until a week later when you and Kyle were working on a grapevine when you noticed something strange about the bottom of the plant.
“Kyle, does it look like the plant is molding?” You ask him and he quickly goes on his knees to inspect it.
“Go get Nick, he’s in the house.” Kyle tells you and you run to the house. You walk inside as they left the doors open and you see Chessy in the kitchen, cooking something.
“Y/n? What are you doing here?” She asks as she sees you.
“Where’s Nick? It’s important.” You ask her.
“NICK!!!” She yells and he jogs into the room a few seconds later.
“What’s up Chessy? Y/n? What are you doing here?”
“Can you come with me? I think something is wrong with one of the grapevines.” You tell him and he follows you outside.
“If it’s molding then we should pull it out and save as much grapes on it as possible.” Kyle tells Nick and he looks at it.
“Yes, you should pull it out and save all the grapes.” Nick says and you and Kyle get to work.
An hour later Chessy comes out and reaches you just as you turn around and bump right into her.
“Oohh! Oh Chessy, I’m sorry.” You tell her and she waves you off.
“It’s no one’s fault, wrong timing is all. I was just wondering if the problem got fixed. The one that you had to get Nick to help solve.” She asks and you smile.
“Oh that, ya. We had to pull one of the vines out as it was dying from the root.” You tell her and she nods. “Did you come just to check on me?” You ask her and she rolls her eyes.
“No.” She simply says and you tilt your head. “Ok maybe.” She changes her answer to.
“Well I’m flattered, I heard you don’t talk to the workers much.” You tell her and she quirks an eyebrow at you.
“Oh, have you asked about me?”
“Of course.” You say to her with a smile.
“I don’t talk much to people because I’m busy.” She tells you as you get back to work.
“And yet you took time out of your busy schedule to come talk to me.” You tell her and smirk.
“Don’t get cocky, I have to go back to work now, but I’ll see you around.” She says softly and you nod.
“You can come out and see me any time during the day.” You tell her and she smiles before she walks back to the house.
The next day she goes to walk Sammy and passes by you. She smiles and waves when she sees you before she continues with the walk. When she finishes the walk, she lets Sammy off the leash and then he starts running back to the house. He ends up taking a slight detour and runs to you. You turn around when you hear him barking and you get on your knees and start petting him. Chessy eventually catches up and walks up to you both.
“What horrible thing were you going to do to him now?” You joke with her and she snorts.
“Nothing this time, I just took him off the leash.” She tells you. “And I guess he ran to his new friend.” She adds and you smile as you continue petting him.
“Well, aren't you sweet?” You say to Sammy and then he runs off. “And I guess he’s had enough.” You say out loud as you stand up. “By the way, did you hear that this publicist is coming to take pictures tomorrow?” You ask her and she nods.
“Ya Nick told me, apparently this girl named Meredith Blake.” She says. “I gotta go finish cleaning the house in case she wants pictures of it as well.” She tells you and you nod before she leaves.
“So you and Chessy are getting along.” Kyle says to you and you turn to look at him.
“I guess.” You tell him and shrug your shoulders.
“I won’t tell anyone about your crush on her.” He says to you and you whip your head towards him.
“I don’t have a crush on her.” You tell him sternly.
“Alright, whatever you say. But you were staring at her as she walked away.” He tells you and then he gets back to work.
The next day a car pulls up and Nick walks out to greet them. You think that it must be the publicist. You see her walk out of the car and you widen your eyes as you see a beautiful young woman step out and greet Nick. You watch them walk around as he gives her a tour and you go back to work. About half an hour later they walk up to where you are and Nick greets you.
“Hey Y/n, this is Meredith Blake, the publicist I told you all about.” He introduces her to you and you nod then shake her hand. You see Nick’s hand is on her back the entire time. “Do you mind if she takes a couple pictures of you working and of the grapes?” He asks you.
“No not at all, go for it.” You tell him and then get back to work. About 10 minutes later they move on to the other areas and you just shake your head at Nick being smitten with her. “If she was my type I might be all over her as well.” You mutter to yourself. “Thankfully she’s not my type.”
“Who is your type then?” You hear behind you and you turn around quickly and see Chessy there with a smile.
“Oh, Chessy. I didn’t even notice or hear you coming.” You tell her and she giggles.
“Sorry to scare you, maybe I’ll wear a bell next time.” She jokes with you and you snort.
“Well that might actually help, that way I’ll know to run away.” You say with a smile and she laughs.
“I saw you met Meredith.” She tells you and you nod. “Apparently they already met a couple times and Nick apparently asked her out and she said yes.” She tells you. “I noticed you eyeing his hand.” She adds on.
“Were you watching me?” You ask her.
“Watching her actually, I want to know what’s going on.” She tells you and you nod. “You didn’t answer my question earlier, what’s your type?” She asks and you slightly blush.
“Oh that’s not important.” You say, trying to not answer the question.
“Come on, I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours.”
“I’m actually ok not knowing what kind of man catches your eye.” You say as you look at a couple grapes before picking them out and putting them in a basket.
“Man or woman.” She says and you look at her. “I’m attracted to both genders.” She tells you and you stare at her for a couple seconds.
“I’m attracted to women.” You tell her and she nods. “Attracted to one's a bit older than me and brunettes the most.” You say, keeping it a bit short but then realised you described her.
“Hm, interesting. Well I’m attracted to both genders and it’s not really anything physical that really attracts me, it’s more personality. Like kind, confident and romantic.” She says to you and you nod.
“That’s a good list to have. I wasted a small amount of time on a girl who wasn’t nice.” You tell her and she smiles.
“Well you can use my list as a reference then.” She says and then both of you say bye before she leaves to the house.
“I just don’t know what he sees in her.” Chessy tells you a few days later as she holds the basket full of grapes for you.
“Well she’s pretty and good at selling.” You tell her as you place a grape in the basket.
“She’s barely selling the wine.” She says and you look at her.
“I didn’t say it was the wine that she’s good at selling.” You tell her and she snorts. “You seem a bit jealous.” You add and she shakes her head.
“Not jealous, more concerned.” She tells you. “Nick and Hal are family to me, and I don’t think Hal is going to like this.” She says as you place another grape in the basket.
“When is she coming back?” You ask her.
“In 15 days.” She tells you.
“Well we can’t be too surprised that Nick is dating, he is a single man.” You say to her.
“I guess, it did take him a while to get over his ex-wife.” She says and you hum.
“Well there’s nothing we can do, so how about you focus on keeping the house going until Hallie comes back?” You tell her and she nods.
“Good point, it’s not like anything serious will happen at least until Hal meets her.” She says and you nod.
“Exactly.” You tell her as you put another grape in the basket. She then hands the basket back to you.
“I gotta go make some lunch.” She says and you nod at her.
“Have fun.” You tell her and she smiles before walking to the house.
“I don’t have a crush on her.” You hear Kyle as he imitates you.
“We can be acquaintances.” You tell him.
“She might be acquaintances with you but you got a crush on her.” He says and you roll your eyes.
“I don’t, she’s just an interesting person.” You tell him and then he looks unimpressed and gets back to work.
The next day you have your raincoat on as it’s raining out and then you all hear thunder coming and then see lightning that’s pretty close.
“Come on, we got to take shelter.” Kyle tells you and you grab the basket and then run to cover.
You, Kyle and a couple others take shelter at the front porch of the house and wait out the storm while others take shelter in the horse shelter.
“Is everyone ok?” You hear and turn to see Chessy there.
“Ya everyone is good, just saw lightning really close by.” You basically shout over the rain and she nods.
The following week she stops by to say hi to you.
“Hey you.” She says softly and you look at her.
“Where’s your bell?” You joke with her and she laughs.
“I knew I forgot something.” She says and you giggle.
“I guess you’re excited about Hallie coming back in 7 days.” You tell her and she nods.
“Yep, but it’s looking serious between Nick and Meredith. I saw them making out the other day by the pool.”
“Ew.” You say and she laughs.
“It’s even worse if you catch them.” She says and you smile.
“You must be traumatised.” You say dramatically and she laughs again.
“I most definitely am.”
“So what brings you by? Came to rant again?” You ask her and she shakes her head.
“Nope, just came to say hi to my friend as I have some free time.” She tells you and you smile.
“Already at friends?” You ask her shyly and she nods.
“Well we shared our attractions so I think friends is acceptable.” She says and you laugh.
“It definitely is.” You say as you pull out a couple weeds around one of the grapevines.
For the rest of the week, Chessy comes to talk to you everyday and then on Thursday she comes out running to you.
“Y/n!” She yells and you turn to look at her.
“What is it?”
“They’re engaged.” She says to you and you look at her confused. “Nick just proposed to Meredith and she said yes.” She tells you and you widen your eyes.
“That’s quick.” You say and she nods.
“Hal doesn’t even know her father is dating someone, and now he’s engaged.” She says. “She’s coming back in 2 days.” She exclaims and you rub her arm to comfort her.
“Just relax, maybe Hallie might like it.” You tell her and she looks at you unimpressed.
“I’m calm, but I know Hal won’t like it.” She tells you. “Are you working on Saturday?” She asks and you nod.
“Ya I work everyday over the summer.” You tell her.
“I might rant to you over the weekend.” She tells you and you nod.
“You can come rant to me anytime.” You tell her and she smiles.
“Thank you.” She says and you smile at her.
The next day you see Chessy frantically getting things ready for Hallie’s arrival, as well as going shopping to pick up everything for meals.
On Saturday morning you see Nick’s car pulling up and you see a ginger haired girl getting out as well as Chessy running out, screaming excitedly and you snort.
“She’s such a dork.” You mutter and then you look to see Kyle looking at you amused. “Still not a crush.” You tell him and he shrugs his shoulders and gets back to work.
You then hear barking and you see Sammy barking at Hallie and avoiding her. That’s odd. Chessy told you that Sammy adores Hallie.
You then see Hallie go inside and Chessy pets Sammy before following her. You see Meredith walking around in a white dress with a hat on and you shake your head. You wonder when Chessy will come out and rant to you.
You see her coming out about an hour later and you pretend that you don’t see her, to make sure that Kyle sees you don’t have a crush on her.
“Hey Y/n.” She says and you look at her with a smile.
“Hey Chessy, come out to rant already?” You ask her and she shrugs her shoulders.
“Not only is Hal meeting Meredith right now, she also seems different. It seems she changed a lot at camp.” She tells you and you nod.
“Well she’s almost 12, don’t they tend to do that at that age?” You ask her amused and she nods.
“They do but she barely touched the chili I made even though it’s her favourite thing in the world.” She says. “Not to mention that Sammy is avoiding her.” She adds on.
“Ya, I saw that, I did think that was weird.” You tell her and she nods. “Just give it a couple days and I’m sure once she settles in then she’ll be begging you to make that chili again.” You tell her and she smiles.
“You always know what to say, don’t you?” She asks and you blush a little.
“I guess I can be a woman of words.” You tell her and she laughs. The both of you chat a bit until she has to go start on dinner.
“You guys spend a lot of time together.” Kyle tells you when Chessy is out of ear shot.
“Well we’re friends and we don’t spend a whole lot of time together, I mean we only talk while I work.” You tell him.
“You mean you don’t spend time together outside of working hours?” He asks and you shake your head. “Are you really friends if you don’t spend time together outside of work? It sounds like you’re work friends.” He tells you and you frown.
“Maybe.” You tell him and go on your knees to pull out a weed.
The next day you see Nick and Hallie take off on their horses and then Chessy comes out with Sammy. Sammy remains off leash and he chooses to run up to you.
“Hey Sammy!” You exclaim and go to pet him.
“He definitely likes you. He might have a little crush on you.” Chessy tells you when she catches up.
“I bet he likes everyone.” You tell her.
“Except for Hal, he’s still avoiding her.” She tells you and you look at her. “And she’s still acting strange.” She adds.
“Strange how?” You ask and she sighs.
“She barely touched breakfast, she took a bite out of a piece of toast and then took off. She normally loves to eat a lot at breakfast. She’s also gotten incredibly proper which is unusual and she forgot how to open the door to go outside.” She tells you.
“So she’s acting a bit different, but she’s still Hallie. I mean there’s not someone else who looks exactly like her.” You joke and she looks like she’s thinking about something. “Right?” You ask her and she snaps out of her thoughts and looks at you.
“Right, exactly.” She tells you.
“I’ve got a lot to do today.” You tell her and she looks at you.
“You don’t want to talk with a friend like we did yesterday?” She asks and she tilts her head.
“Well work friends don’t always talk to each other for an hour or two everyday.” You tell her and she frowns.
“Work friends?” She asks.
“Ya, I mean we only talk to each other while at work. Isn’t that work friends?”
“Oh, right, I guess so.” She tells you with disappointment in her voice.
“Everything alright?” You ask her and she smiles and nods.
“Yep, just remembered something I have to do.” She tells you and heads inside, and Sammy follows her. You get back to work and you see Kyle looking at you strangely.
Chessy heads inside and finishes cleaning the kitchen before she gets her glasses out and goes to read in the chair. Her mind goes to wander to you and you saying that her and you are just work friends and that kinda stung. She thought you two were real friends but then thinks you have a point, you don’t hang out outside of work. That didn’t stop her from developing a crush on you though. She’s suddenly snapped out of her thoughts when Hallie barges in all anxious.
Chessy is in the kitchen 30 minutes later making food for Annie when she catches sight of you working on the grapes. She looks out of the window just to watch you working and gets lost in thought. She doesn’t know how much time has passed when Annie walks into the kitchen.
“What are you staring at?” She asks Chessy and Chessy slightly jumps and turns around.
“Nothing! Nobody.” She says and Annie looks unconvinced.
“You were staring at someone?” She asks and Chessy shakes her head.
“Of course not, why would you ask that?” Chessy says with a slight blush and Annie smiles.
“Well I just came to tell you that Hallie is telling our mother tomorrow morning and then we’re going to be switched back.” She tells Chessy.
“Well I guess that’s what’s bound to happen when you switch places with your secret twin.” Chessy tells her amused and Annie laughs.
“Why didn’t they tell us that we’re a twin? I mean you knew.” Annie asks her and Chessy looks at a lost for words.
10 minutes later you’re on a ladder getting some grapes up top while Kyle is holding on.
“Hey Y/n.” Chessy tells you and you look down and see Chessy and Hallie there.
“Hey Chessy, just a moment.” You tell her.
“Kyle, none of these grapes are ready.” You tell him.
“I guess they’re growing slower on this one. We’ll just check again tomorrow.” He tells you and you nod then get down. Kyle takes the ladder and walks away to put it away.
“So Chessy, what’s up.” You ask her as you take your gloves off.
“Well I wanted to introduce you to someone.” She says.
“Oh, well hello Hallie.” You tell her and shake her hand. “Chessy has told me quite a bit about you.”
“Well actually this isn’t Hallie.” Chessy says and Annie looks at her in shock. “You can trust her.” Chessy says and you look confused.
“I’m actually Annie, Hallie’s twin.” Annie says with her British accent and you look at Chessy and she confirms with a nod.
“Well it’s nice to meet you Annie, and I see you’re from the UK.” You tell her and she nods.
“From London. Chessy wanted me to meet you before I get switched back with Hallie.” She says and you nod.
The 3 of you talk for a little bit before Annie and Chessy had to go back inside to eat and you had to get ready to leave.
The next day Chessy comes up to you and takes a breath before speaking.
“We’re all leaving tomorrow morning to go to the Stafford hotel.” She tells you and you look at her.
“Well hello to you too.” You tell her with a smile and she chuckles.
“Hey Y/n, we’re switching the twins back as Hallie told their mom.” She tells you and you nod.
“Well at least you’ll get to see Hallie again.” You tell her and she smiles.
“Ya, but I’m going to miss Annie. I saw both of them when they came home from the hospital and then a year later Elizabeth takes off with Annie.” She tells you and you grab her hand.
“I’m sure it’ll all work out as the twins will want to see each other again as well as see their parents again.” You tell her and Chessy looks at your hand in hers and nods.
“You’re right, I’m excited to see Hal again and I’ll see Annie again.” She says and you smile at her before you let go of her hand.
“How long are you going to be gone for?” You ask her.
“Nick reserved a couple bedrooms for a couple nights.” She tells you and you nod.
“Well I’ll see you when you get back, and I can’t wait to meet Hallie.” You tell her and she smiles at you before she goes to pack.
You do your work for a couple days and then you see them come back home, only this time there’s 2 cars coming back. You watch as 2 ginger-haired girls get out of the car, as well as Nick, Chessy, Meredith and Sammy, as well as a couple other people you don’t know.
You watch Chessy for the whole day and see her and this guy being really close with each other. You feel a sting in your heart at seeing them spending time together and being all giggles. You start feeling jealousy at seeing her with someone else and you work and mope until Chessy walks over to you.
“Y/n!” She exclaims as she comes over with that guy and the twins. “I wanted to introduce you to the twins and also Martin. We don’t know which one is which as they won’t tell us. And Martin is Elizabeth and Annie’s butler.” She tells you with a smile.
“Well nice to meet you Martin and Hallie.” You say and look directly at her.
“How’d you know which one was who?” Hallie exclaims and you smile.
“You just told me.” You say and they pout before you hear Chessy giggle. Martin then gets called by Elizabeth and he goes to help her.
“Isn’t he great?” Chessy asks you and the twins look at her and then at you.
“I don’t know him.” You tell her, harsher than you thought and she looks at you confused due to her tone.
“Well him and I are going on a picnic date tomorrow while everyone else is away camping.” She says and you go back to picking grapes.
“Cool.” You say, completely uninterested in the conversation. The twins look between the two of you before looking at each other and then leaving. Chessy watches them leave and then steps closer to you.
“Are you ok? Did something happen while we were away?” She asks with concern and puts her hand on your shoulder but you shrug her off.
“I’m fine, I just have work to do, as you can see.” You tell her with a snap to your voice and she looks at you surprised.
“If something is bothering you then you know you can tell me.” She says and you look at her without any emotion.
“Why would I tell you? We’re just work friends, remember?” You say and she nods.
“I guess you just need some space right now, I’ll leave you be.” She tells you and walks away.
You let out a breath when she’s out of earshot and Kyle comes up to you.
“Still denying that you have feelings for her?” He asks and you glare at him before you soften your features.
“I know I like her, but she obviously likes that Martin guy instead of me.”
“So what are you going to do? You can brush her off like that everytime she comes to talk to you.” He tells you and you sigh.
“I can’t talk to her without being jealous about her and Martin.” You tell him.
“So you are going to brush her off every time?” He asks and you nod. “Doesn’t she come to talk to you a few times per week?” He asks you and you nod.
“I have to start distancing myself as I have a major crush on her. At this point it’s not even a crush, I have feelings for her, real feelings for her.” You tell him and he rubs your back before going back to work.
“So your plan is to get her to not like you anymore?” He asks and you nod.
“It’ll make her stop coming to talk to me.” You say and then you go back to work.
You watch Chessy and Martin kiss under an umbrella as Annie, Elizabeth and Martin head back to London. It’s been 2 days since you started distancing yourself from Chessy and you still feel a sting in your heart at her spending a lot of time with Martin, especially since you heard that she spent a whole day and a night with him.
The next day you see Chessy walking around the yard with Sammy and then Sammy runs up to you and demands pets from you. You couldn’t keep yourself from ignoring him as he’s too sweet and cute, so you obviously start petting him.
“So you refuse to spend time with me but not him?” Chessy asks as she comes up to you both.
“Didn’t think you’d notice?” You tell her and she looks at you confused. “You were spending every minute with Martin.” You tell her and she frowns.
“Yes but he’s back in London now.” She tells you.
“And didn’t Nick and Hallie not go after them?” You ask her and she nods. “So he’s going to come back and you’ll be able to spend all the time you want with him.” You snap at her.
“What’s been going on with you lately? Ever since we came back from San Francisco, you’ve been acting different.” She says and you roll your eyes. You go to walk to a different grapevine but she grabs your wrist. “Y/n, please talk to me.” She says and you glare at her.
“Why do you care if I talk to you or not?” You ask her and she looks hurt by your words. Before she speaks again, Kyle comes up to you both and looks at Chessy.
“Sorry to interrupt but I need Y/n’s help with something.” He says and Chessy lets go of you.
“Of course, I’ll talk to you later then Y/n.” She says to you and you watch her walk away and then turn to Kyle.
“Thank you.” You tell him after taking a breath.
“You’re welcome. But I can’t save you all the time, you should come up with an excuse as to why you don’t want to see her ever again or tell her the truth.” He tells you and you sigh.
“Obviously I’m gonna lie, I just have to come up with a reason why.” You tell him.
“I don’t understand why you never told her that you have feelings for her.”
“Because I’m not her type.” You tell him.
“What did she say her type was again?”
“Kind, confident and romantic.” You say and he looks at you.
“So you don’t want to be nice to her anymore cause that would just turn her off?”
“I was never trying to turn her on, and besides she has Martin now.” You tell him. “And he seems like her type.” You say, unknown to you, Chessy was watching you and Kyle talk from a window inside the house.
Chessy takes a deep breath and places her hands on the counter to steady herself. She likes Martin but she also likes you. She thinks how Martin is her type, he’s nice to her, he’s confident with what he wants and he took her out on a romantic picnic. But during the picnic she remembers thinking about you. But you seem to be pushing her away and she doesn’t know why.
She would rather be with you as she likes you more, but you have no romantic interest in her, and it seems that you have no platonic interest in her anymore as well. She slumps down on the ground and Sammy walks up and sits next to her, providing comfort. If you want nothing to do with her then she’ll just have to respect your wishes and stay away, besides she has Martin now and there’s a good chance he’s coming back.
A couple days later you see Nick and Hallie pull up and get out of the car with smiles on their faces, and you’re guessing that it’s all going to work out for them.
Nick and Hallie tell Chessy that the whole James household is moving in with them, including Martin. She’s excited at first but then it sinks in for her that Martin is going to be around the entire time and each day she stares at you from a window.
A week later the James household and Martin come to the ranch with some essentials before the rest of their stuff comes from London.
The whole first week of them being there, you try to ignore Chessy and Martin being close to each other. Chessy hasn’t tried to talk to you since you snapped at her and you can’t blame her.
The day after the first week of everyone moving in, you come to the ranch and Hallie and Annie come up to you.
“What can I do for you two?” You ask them.
“Why are you and Chessy not talking to each other?” Annie asks you and you look at her.
“We were acquaintances but we’re not anymore.” You simply tell her.
“But why?” She pushes and you sigh.
“The reason doesn’t matter.” You tell her as you get back to work.
“Is it because of Martin? You snapped at her when she introduced you to Martin.” She asks and you got to give her credit for catching on to that.
“What would anything have to do with him?” You ask her.
“Because you like her.” Hallie simply says and you wipe your head at them.
“Is there a reason for this questioning?” You ask them as calmly as possible.
“Chessy likes you as well.” Annie says and Hallie agrees.
“And why would you say that?” You ask them.
“Because when I was here, she spent a lot of time with you, spoke highly of you and I caught her staring out the window at you.” Annie says and you sigh.
“I still don’t see the reason for you two talking to me.”
“Well don��t you see? You like her and she likes you, you should be together.” Hallie says.
“Annie, have you forgotten that your butler is with her?” You ask her and she thinks about that for a moment.
“We can break them up.” Annie says.
“No, I’m not going to ruin a happy relationship because of feelings that Chessy might have had for me at some point.”
“She still likes you.” Hallie says and you look at them. “We see her staring out the window every day. The window that just so happens to be in the spot to see you perfectly.” She adds and you go back to work.
“Annie and Hallie, I’m only going to say this once. Chessy is happy with Martin and her and I are no longer acquaintances or friends or whatever we were. So please just drop it, ok?” You tell them and they look at you.
“If we dropped it with our parents then they wouldn’t be together.” Annie says and Hallie nods.
“Chessy and I aren’t your parents.” You tell them and then they seem to get an idea and run away.
Back at the house, Chessy is sitting on the living room couch with Martin when the twins walk in.
“Chessy, can we talk to you?” Hallie says as they go up to her.
“What’s up Hal?” She asks and then they take her hands and drag her up to their room. “Guys, what is going on?” She asks them once they close the door.
“It’s about Y/n.” Hallie says.
“What about Y/n? Is she ok?” Chessy asks.
“Physically yes, emotionally not so much.” Annie says and Hallie nods.
“What?”
“Why aren’t you two friends anymore?” Annie asks. “When I was here, you spoke highly of her and a lot.”
“Well Y/n didn’t want me in her life anymore.” Chessy tells them honestly. “I tried talking to her and she snapped at me twice. That’s what happened.”
“But why did she snap at you?” Hallie asks.
“I don’t know, you’d have to ask her.”
“We did, she didn’t give us a direct answer but we have a good idea why.” Annie says and Chessy looks at them in confusion.
“And why do you think Y/n snapped at me?” Chessy asks them.
“Because she likes you, as in, has feelings for you.” Hallie tells her and Chessy looks at them, at a lost for words.
“Did she specifically tell you that?” She asks them carefully.
“No, but she didn’t deny it.” Hallie says.
“She started snapping at you after you introduced her to Martin, Chessy she was jealous.” Annie says to her.
“We’ve been talking all summer, she never said anything.” Chessy says.
“We don’t know the reason for that, but she could be scared.” Hallie says.
“Why are you telling me this?” Chessy asks them.
“Because you deserve to know, we know you have feelings for her.” Annie says.
“But I’m with Martin now.” Chessy says.
“Well it all depends on who you’d rather be with.” Hallie tells her.
“You can stay with Martin or you can tell Y/n the truth.” Annie adds.
Chessy is looking out the window at you working and Martin comes up to her.
“Why do you stare out that window everyday?” He asks her and she turns around.
“No important reason.” She says and he looks out of it.
“Oh, I can see the vineyard from here, I guess it’s a nice view.” He says. “Oh and there’s your friend Y/n.” He says to her.
“She’s not my friend anymore.” She says to him.
“Why not?”
“Because she doesn’t want me in her life anymore.”
“Did she say why?”
“No, she didn’t, and it hurts.” She says and Martin hugs her.
“Why don’t we go ask her together? Demand an answer from her.”
“I don’t think she’ll say anything with you there, it took a while before she started opening up to me.” Chessy tells him.
“It’s that why you look out the window everyday? Cause you’re looking at Y/n.” Martin asks and Chessy nods. “Are you staring at her because you’re longing to be her friend or for a different reason?” Martin asks and Chessy looks at him.
“Different reason.” She tells him and Martin looks disappointed before looking at her.
“Is the reason that you’d rather be with her?” He asks and she nods. “I understand.” He says and goes to walk away. “You can’t choose who to love, the heart chooses for you, no matter what.” He says and a few tears fall down Chessy’s face.
“You’re really sweet and romantic but I can’t stop thinking about her.” Chessy says and Martin nods.
“Then you should go tell her.” Martin says and Chessy nods before leaving.
You see Chessy walking out and then walking towards you but you pretend that you don’t see her. You notice her coming closer to you and you start to walk away but she catches up with you and she grabs your wrist.
“Come with me.” She says sternly and you look at her.
“I’m working.” You tell her and you see a fire in her eyes.
“Nick won’t care, come with me.” She says and you let her pull you away. She pulls you until you’re alone in the garden and you look at her in confusion.
“What’s all this about? I thought we weren’t talking to each other anymore.” You say to her.
“Did you get jealous?” She asks you and you look at her.
“What?”
“The reason you snapped at me, is it because I was with Martin and you were jealous?” She asks you and you widen your eyes.
“Of course I’m not jealous.” You tell her but she grabs your shoulders.
“You’re lying.” She tells you plainly and you look at her in shock. “Martin and I aren’t together anymore.” She tells you.
“Why?” You ask her and she softens her features.
“Because I can’t stop thinking about you.” She says and you widen your eyes.
“What?”
“I look out a window where I can see you perfectly everyday, when I’m talking to Martin or kissing him then I think about you when I shouldn’t be. I think about you constantly throughout the day. Y/n, I like Martin, he’s nice.” She says and takes a deep breath before speaking again but you interrupt her.
“Then go be with him and leave me alone.” You say and try to walk away but she grabs your arm and looks at you.
“I like him but I’m falling for you.” She says and you stop breathing for a second. “I want to be with you.” She adds.
“Is this some sort of trick? Payback for snapping at you?” You ask her and she shakes her head.
“You snapping at me broke my heart. When you asked me why I care about you, it broke me.” She tells you and you stare at her. You then lunge forward and kiss her, Chessy is shocked by the suddenness but then kisses you back immediately. You pull away once you realise what you did and you stare at her in shock.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have-” You start to say but she cuts you off by pulling you back into a kiss.
“Don’t apologise, I’ve been wanting to kiss you for a month now.” She tells you after pulling back.
“But you’re with Martin.” You tell her and she shakes her head.
“He figured out that I liked you and I told him I’d rather be with you.” She says. “But I need to know if you want to be with me.” She says. “I know you kissed me but I need words.” She adds and you smile.
“I do want to be with you, I didn’t tell you because I thought you didn’t like me that way and then you got with Martin.” You tell her and she smiles. “I did get jealous, I’m sorry I snapped at you.” You say to her and she strokes your cheek.
“I forgave you for that pretty much right after you snapped at me. I just wanted you to talk to me but I stayed away as I thought you wanted me out of your life.”
“I did, but only because I didn’t want to have to fake a smile every time you talk to me about Martin.” You tell her and she runs her fingers through your hair.
“Well you don’t have to worry about him, I’m not with him anymore.” She says softly.
“When did you break up with him? The twins talked to me today and it seemed like you were still with him.” You ask her.
“We broke up right before I came to talk to you.” She says and you tilt your head.
“I hope I’m not some rebound.”
“You’re not, you’re the one I’d rather be with.” She says and you lean into her touch. “You know the twins came to talk to me earlier as well. Told me that you have feelings for me, I almost couldn’t believe it.” She says and you hum.
“They just love setting people up don’t they?” You ask her and she laughs.
“I guess so, first their parents and now us.” She says and you nod. “I’m gonna get them such a great birthday gift for their meddling.” She tells you and you laugh.
“I have one question for you.” You tell her and she looks at you and nods. “Did you sleep with Martin?” You ask her and she shakes her head.
“No, I was going to but I couldn’t because I thought about you instead of him.”
“Hmm, you must have a lot of pent up sexual energy then.” You tell her as you wrap your arms around her.
“Yes and you’re just feeding into it right now.” She tells you and you smile. “Do you live alone?” She asks and you nod.
“Well how about I tell them I’m going out for the night and you take me home with you after you’re done work? I’ll even bring supper for us to have.” She says and you smile.
“Sounds good.” You tell her and you squeeze her ass before walking away.
“You’ll pay for that later.” She tells you and you turn around to face her.
“No idea what you’re talking about.” You tell her and you wink at her before you continue walking away.
“So did you talk to her?” Hallie asks Chessy as she makes supper.
“I did.” Chessy says and then they look at her.
“And?” Annie asks.
“Well thanks to you two meddlers, she and I talked and she kissed me after I confessed.” She tells them and they smile.
“So you two are together now?” Hallie asks and Chessy nods.
“She’s bringing me to her place after she’s done work.” She tells them. “I already told Nick that I’ll be gone for the night.”
“Well good, it’s about time. Ever since you introduced me to her I saw sparks.” Annie says to her.
“Well you’ll be getting a really nice birthday gift this year.
“And that’s in 6 weeks.” Hallie says and Annie smiles.
“Yep, October 11.” Chessy says to them and then continues making supper.
After you’re done work, Chessy walks out with a container in her hand and meets you at your car.
“Hey you.” Chessy says and kisses you.
“Ready to go?” You ask her and she nods.
You drive to your place and then you go and unlocks the door and she follows you inside.
“Nice place.” She says.
“It’s not much but it’s home.” You tell her and she smiles.
“I think it’s perfect.” She says and then goes to the kitchen and places the food on plates before handing you one.
“Thank you.” You tell her and then you go to the kitchen table with her. “Why did we never hang out outside of work?” You ask her and she shrugs.
“Didn’t think you’d want to.” She says and you tilt your head at her. “Especially after that work friends comment you made.” She says and you frown.
“That was me wanting to hang out with you outside of work.” You tell her and she smiles.
“Well we are now so quit complaining.” She says and you give a salute.
“Yes ma’am.” You say and she snorts.
You put the dishes in the sink after you’re both done and as soon as you turn around she kisses you.
“And what were you wanting to do?” You ask her and she hums.
“Well we can kiss, talk or something more than kissing.” She says and you stare at her.
“You mean sex?” You ask her and she nods. “I lost count over how many times I’ve masturbated while thinking about you.” You tell her and she smiles.
“Same.” She tells you and you smile.
“My bedroom is just down the hall.” You tell her and then bring her there. She closes the door and then you trap her between the door and you. You immediately kiss her and place your hands on her waist to bring her closer to you. You trail down to her neck and she moves her head to give you more space and you start sucking. She gasps as you leave hickeys all over her neck and you feel her legs give way so you hoist her up and lean her on the wall while her legs are wrapped around your waist. You then take her shirt off and you stare at the sight of her breasts in the bra. “I knew you had a bigger chest but wow.” You tell her and she smiles.
“There's a lot to suck on and touch.” She tells you and you reach behind her and unclip her bra. You throw it across the room and immediately attach your mouth to a nipple. She moans out as soon as you attach your mouth and she puts her hands in your hair and tugs slightly. You switch to her other nipple and you trail your hand down and undo her khakis. You get her off of you and then you immediately take her pants and underwear off. You go to kiss her again but she stops you and then she takes your shirt off. “If I’m completely naked then you have to be as well.” She says as she takes off all of your clothes.
You go on your knees and then quickly find her clit with your tongue and you start sucking and licking. Chessy places her hand on the wall, while placing her other hand in your hand and closes her eyes and has her mouth open.
“Oh god, I forgot how good women are with their mouths.” She says and you smirk. She then yanks your hair to push your mouth off of her and she gets you on your feet. “I don’t want a mouth on me though, I want fingers inside of me. I want to feel you inside of me until I come around your fingers.” She says and you push her up against the wall while she wraps her legs around your waist. You then make sure her entrance is nice and wet before pushing a finger in and she gasps. “Insert another one.” She tells you once you start pumping and you then quickly insert a second finger and it slides in easily.
“You’re so wet Chess.” You tell her and she whimpers. “Is this what you imagined me doing to you?” You ask her and her eyes are shut again. She nods quickly and you smirk. You continue pumping in and out her and you pick up the pace when you feel her legs around you start to shake. “Are you close Chess?” You ask her and she nods again. Moans and gasps are spilling out of her mouth and you just love getting these sounds out of her. “Take your time and come when you need to.” You tell her and you feel her body tense up and she squeezes around your fingers before she comes with a gasp.
You bring her over to your bed and cuddle her as she calms down and then she turns to you with a smile. “My god, you’re good with your tongue and your fingers.” She says with a chuckle and you smile.
“Women know what feels good on other women as they have the same body.” You tell her and she hums. She then reaches over and easily finds your clit and begins rubbing it. You buck your hips and gasp and she smirks at your actions.
“Something specific you want? Tongue or fingers?” She asks you.
“Please stick your fingers inside of me, as well as get on top of me so I can feel your boobs on me.” You manage to get out and she giggles but does as you ask. She gets on top of you and then inserts two fingers inside of you and you moan out. It doesn’t take long until your whole body tenses and then you come on her fingers. She takes her fingers out of you, licks your juices off of her and moans at your taste.
“Next time I’m gonna use my tongue on you if you taste this sweet.” She says with a smile and you chuckle.
The next morning you bring her to the ranch and she brings you into the kitchen with her and immediately goes to kiss you. You two make out in the kitchen until you hear someone clear their throat. She pushes you off of her and you both turn to see everyone watching you. The twins run outside with Martin and Elizabeth speaks up first.
“Have a nice night?” She asks you both.
“Yep.” Chessy says and lays her head on your chest.
“It looks like it, might want to cover up your hickeys.” Elizabeth says and Chessy looks at you.
“How many did you leave on me?” She asks you and you shrug your shoulders.
“Do you want me to count?” You ask her with a smile and she slaps your head playfully.
“Come on, since you put them on me then you’re gonna help me cover them up.” She tells you as she drags you to her room.
“So you’re not bringing me to your room to make more?” You ask her and she rolls her eyes.
“I hate you.” She tells you and you laugh.
“That’s not what you said last night.”
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Ok yeah I think I was too vague or something. Also yes that is a quite from a song.
Here’s some cookies I had in mind when Y/N said this:
Pure Vanilla
Crème brûlée
Black Pearl
Red velvet?
Sea fairy
You can add extra if you want, but it’s optionally.
-🪑Anon

Okay so I did some brief research on the quote (because I've always never understood what it meant) but basically it means that the person doesn't wants all of the other's love. Which in this case is just feeding into the yandere idea.
I'm so sleepy so if things are weird...I'm too lazy to care.
Tw: Mentions of murder, isolation, kidnapping, nonconsensual transformation of the body, delusions, threats
Pure Vanilla
- If you don't know if this man is obsessed with you, you are inherently stupid. I've basically confirmed he is definitely one of the most obsessive ones, so you feeding into his delusions is not helping. At all.
- MC notices his (extremely obvious) attraction to them and says said quote, "Don't go wasting all your emotions, lay all your love on me". This makes him delighted, as he thinks you're accepting his delusions.
- His delusions are basically that you were meant for him and him only. You should always rely on him for any kind of help you may need. You were destined to be together.
"Oh, my darling bluebell! You really just want me to put all my attention on you, don't you? My, my, I guess I have to fulfill your requests." *smiling so creepily*
- I would imagine he would either A. Manipulate everyone into thinking you're married, or B. He isolates you from everybody. He locks you away in his castle.
Crème Brûlée (FINALLY SOMEONE WHO USES THE DIACRITICS)
- Bro is obviously very focused on his music 24/7. He's constantly practicing or editing his notes on what is going on musically in his sheet music. But...that doesn't mean he isn't keeping an eye on you too.
- He'll be very subtle compared to others when it comes to his yandere tendencies. He's someone who prefers to work in the shadows when it comes to his murders (he will murder 100%). The only time you'll ever see his unhinged moments are when you are alone with him, or you've been blatantly ignoring his affections. I will say, he isn't that obvious, so he can get pissy easily.
- *insert MC saying the quote*. Two things: one, he'll be so relieved and giddy that you notice his affections. Like he is literally doing twirls and jumps of joy. Second, he can narrow his focus onto the tiniest of details easily, so I can imagine he'll be a lot more obvious with his motions.
- Oh and he'll murder more. You basically accept him being a murderer.
"Huh? Why do you look so scared? Don't worry, I'm not gonna stab you or anything. I just killed Mint Choco over there for being too chatty with you." (Average Pianist moment: murdering our competitors /j)
Black Pearl
- Why the fuck would you do this. Like okay Pure Vanilla locks you away, and Crème Brûlée goes stabby stabby, but her??? You are literally everyone is fucked, including you.
- Just like the prior two, she'll be joyous that you're more accepting (kind of). She's much more calm about it. She just kinda giggles before threatening to take you back to the sea with her.
- That's what she does. She drags you down into the sea with her. You'll be kept some kind of structure, whether it's an abandoned ship or an underwater cave. From there, she just admires you and snuggles you a lot. Expect dead bodies as presents.
- She's not necessarily worshipful like Golden Cheese is. She's more so comfortable especially with the fact you're the first person to not have abandoned her/shut her out. More like a clingy but threatening cat.
- Like if you try to leave after what you said she'll just get pissy and destroy all the reasons you have to go back to the surface.
"Aww, now you don't have to go back up there! You can just stay here with me, in our home. You and I need some alone time..."
Red Velvet
- He's odd about it. When you feed into his illness, he's like "Why do you love me???" He assumes you love him back. He's so happy about it but also is confused over whether it's true or not.
- Regardless, he'll be more insistent on protecting you with his cake army. He doesn't want to lose the fact that you don't fear him. You want his love right? What better way than letting his cakehounds be all over you?
- The downfall to this though is that if you try to escape or anyone tries to take you back, he'll rage. He'll be irrational and try to turn you partially into a cake monster like him. He thinks you'll have to stay with him then. He prefers to mould you with a cakehound design.
- Then you'll be extra cute.
"Look at your little ears! They suit you so well. Now you're really the 2nd parent of my children."
- Cakehounds will see you as a parent no matter what.
Sea Fairy
- I read my general headcanons on her, and I think if she sees that you are accepting her actions, her guilt will go away. Then she'll be much more firm with doing anything immoral.
- I think instead of simply trapping you in her tower, she'll try to somehow make you a cookie related to the sea. She'll use her powers and permanently turn you into relying on the ocean.
- If you try to protest after she's done the transformation, she'll be confused. Didn't you say you wanted all her love? Well, this is all her love. You'll eternally have to rely on her and be within her presence.
- She'll feel guilt once more over you being distraught; however, she also feels this is your own fault for saying you want all her love. You could have said you just wanted her attention, not literally all her love.
- She'll try to comfort you after. It's a struggle though.
"Please do not be so troubled. I assure you this form will not change your identity. Only visiting your friends above the sea will be arduous."
—————————————————————————
Please do not feed into a yandere's illness. Literally you're just making a pit of doom for yourself.
Also, if you use Crème Brǔlée’s diacritics I love you.
My back hurts so bad. But anyway, hope you enjoyed! I need to snooze.
- Celina
#cookie run#yandere cookie run#cookie run x reader#cookie run kingdom#crk#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere crk#pure vanilla cookie#sea fairy cookie#Crème brûlée cookie#creme brulee cooie#red velvet cookie#black pearl cookie
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The Thief and Liar Edition
I am not going to play nicey nicey here. Savage_Spittin_Facts is a liar and an identity thief.
As a Lukola things aren't how we would like them to be. The Lukola fandom isn't what it used to be, there is always some drama or beefing going on these days, but there are still some lukolas who just want to enjoy and respect Luke and Nic's bond, celebrate Polin and hope the situation may change in the future. This is why I just could not ignore this. It is so vile what has been done in the name of lukola.
Over the past week or so Savage has been stating they are a gay man and then Savage shared a picture of himself. This was the post - it has since been deleted.
Then Savage posted this photo apparently in response to a tumblr post which stated that Savage had to be a middle aged woman with nothing better to do than spread hate. Savage's response was that he was a gay man who does drag. Again, this post has since been deleted on the Sav account.
Who knows whether this was true or not but I was perhaps well, that is good to come out to your followers during Pride month but I side-eyed all the hate to the LGBTQ+ community. Savage has dished out a lot of hate behind the anonymity of the account. As they talk about visibility and accuse others of not showing their true selves I thought that this could be Savage showing their face, their true selves.
Then, someone dropped a bombshell. Someone who I now know to be close to the person running the Savage account alerted me to another IG account SouthernSassyDrag. NOTE THIS HAS SINCE BEEN DEACTIVATED OR REMOVED BY IG AS OF 6/13. I have screenshots I can upload later.
Here is a post from 26 February from the Sassy account
The exact same photo Savage had shared. Ok Sassy could be Savage's drag name. However, the person who alerted me said that there were comments under some photos on the Sassy account saying Sassy had stolen the photos from another drag artist.
Also, the Sassy account is using similar graphics and posting style of Savage. Surely they were the same person behind it all? Well, yes they are and there was the proof 100%. A thief and a liar - who would've guessed?
The comments under posts on the Sass IG account makes things much clearer. The photo Savage is saying is them is a drag artist here (in the US), who works consistently and under a different name to Sass. This is the drag artist pinned post on his FB asking for help to report the account as he is blocked.
I am writing this to make sense of this because it disgusts me. I have seen some things happen in the fandom but this is a very very low bar. Sass/Savage have taken a successful mans drag persona and passed it off as themselves. Just to be very clear, this drag artist has NO links to the fandom or any shippers. So Sass/Sav are trying to whip up hate by pretending to be a queer man and who is convincedy that Nic is harming the LGBTQ+ community. Savage thinks she speaks for the queer community. She does not and Nic would be appalled.
So Savage was lying about being a gay man with a drag name of Sassy. Two accounts have been set up to harass Luke and Nic (and the adjacents) and the Sass account has been set up to specifically harass Nic and JD. Savage has been spreading hate towards Nic, Luke, their other co-stars, media representatives, close friends and the adjacents for months. What ever you think of the adjacents no one should be subjected to the malicious hate directed at A or the bigotry towards JD. If you do then you know Luke and Nic would not like you for that.
Savage/Sass have tagged co-workers, gay/queer publications, media representatives, a trans author and Savage criticises co-workers including most recently the stars of What It Feels Like for A Girl.
This drag artist has been working consistently for at least 10 years and is also successful in his 9-5 job. What if one of their professional contacts found the account and alerted the drag artist? Why do they not care about trying to ruin someone's reputation? Surely there are consequences for this?
Looking at the comments the actual drag artist has been blocked from the Sass account, assuming so the photos/account never get back to him. Why is a random drag artist so obsessed with Nic and J but doesn't follow any Bridgeton accounts or fan accounts. The math ain't mathing because it is bullshit.
This is below any kind of sensibilities or normal civilised behavior and to do that to a random person in the queer community, a community they say they are a part of (I smell a stench of eau de sauvage bullshit) is evil. It seems ethics and morality are lacking in Savage's/Sass's life. Plus Nic would hate you for doing any of this. Oh yes, but she already does as she's blocked both of the accounts.
Looking more closely at the Sass account another error this 'person' made is that Sass only follows mostly British gay and queer businesses/publications. That is to try and legitimize that, as they are in England, they will know of JD and therefore know his sexuality as some people think that JDs alleged sexuality is very well known in London! Except I couldn't find any details for a drag artist in England working under Sassy Southern Drag. Strange as they do seem to be working (but here in the US). No self-promotion, nothing and no linked accounts. If they work in England under a different name fine but why not use that name? Are the things they are spouting on Sass so hateful it could affect their professional life as a drag artist and being gay?
The Sass account only follows British actors - Luke Featherstone Jack Rooke, Connor Swindells, Laurie Kynaston, Ellie Bamber. Why is a US based drag queen following a handful of British actors who all have links to Nic or JD? Why would this Sass account have so much hate and obsession towards 1 man and Nic? But doesn't follow any other actors?
I am disappointed to see that that people have engaged with Sass or Savage accounts but surely identify theft is a bridge too far?
I see right through you Savage, your lies, arrogance and hatred would always catch up with you at some point. You talk about representation constantly. I am not going to bother even to describe what you represent.
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Mockingjay - Part 3



Hi guys :)
Chapter 3 is here!
I'm sorry if there is some part for the Games who isn't translated correctly, but like I already said English isn't my first language and I only watched the movies or read the book in my native language.
I hope you will like it, please let me know ♥
Chapter before
Ona is nervous. She’s walking around in the room where Leila and his assistant have dressed and prepared her for the interview who will be aired everywhere in Panem. She hates the wait before something big, she’s really stressed about this interview too, but she hates that she has to wait before going to sit in that damn chair.
They are passing by District and the only moment when she stops walking in the room was when she saw Lucy. She’s wearing a beautiful green dress, and she looks perfect. Her hair, her smile… Everything in her is perfect.
Lucy talked about her life in the 4, her family and her brother who won her edition of the Games. Ona is like captivated by Lucy, so much that she doesn’t hear Alexia entering the room. The blonde looks at Ona with amusement for some seconds, arms crossed on her chest before talking softly, not wanting to scare the younger one.
“We have to do something about your crush.”
Even with Alexia’s precautions, Ona almost jumps out of her skin. She turns to Alexia, frowning, a hand on her heart.
“Are you trying to kill me before the Games?”
“No” Alexia chuckles.
She comes in front of Ona to put in place some hair behind her ear.
“You look beautiful, as always” Alexia smiles at her. “So, it was Lucy Bronze you were looking at, all this time?”
“Stop it” Ona mumbles with red cheeks.
“Why? It’s cute” Alexia says with a teasing smile. “Plus, you have good tastes. She looks amazing.”
“She does” Ona says thoughtfully, looking at the screen again.
But they passed to someone else, and she frowns while looking at the boy from the 5 talking about his qualities. Ona turns her gaze quickly now, looking at Alexia again.
“What does your girlfriend look like?” the brunette asks with curiosity.
“She’s smaller than me. Brown hair, brown eyes… And the most beautiful smile in Panem.”
Ona smiles softly. The way Alexia smiles when she talks about her girlfriend is really cute. Ona never asked her about her name, Alexia seems at ease with her relationship, but Ona doesn’t know how much she is. Homosexuality isn’t a thing a lot of people like, at least in the different Districts. It looks like it’s not so bad in the Capitol though.
“I think she would have loved you a lot too” Alexia adds, before looking at her watch. “We have to go now, or you will be late.”
Ona nods and lets Alexia pass a friendly arm around her shoulder, taking extra care not to wrinkle her clothes. Ona’s mind goes to Lucy one more time. They haven’t really talked since the day Lucy takes her to her quarters. They only smile at each other when they cross eyes, both not wanting for their partner not to mingle in their relationship. It isn’t even a friendship, but Ona feels her heart flutter every time.
“I know the situation isn’t ideal, but you still can try to get closer to her, no?”
“How?” Ona snorts. “Have you seen her? She exceptional and I don’t even know if she’s interested in girls”
“Yeah, I’ve seen her. And I see you too. You are pretty amazing yourself you know?”
Ona rolls her eyes and doesn't answer anything. In her eyes, Alexia isn’t impartial. The blonde doesn’t add anything, letting Ona’s mind go in what she just said. Once again, Tony is already here when Ona arrives, he’s waiting with one of Leila's assistants. Once again, Leila made her magic work.
“Alright, I have to go” Alexia says to Ona. “I’ll be in the public, if you are stressed or scared, just focus on me, ok?”
Ona nods softly, ignoring the others' gaze on them. Alexia smiles at her and hugs her.
“You will be great. Don’t be scared of being yourself. People will love you.”
Ona smiles softly at her and takes a big breath when she finds herself alone with Tony. The boy seems to be a little anxious too. He was a little resentful towards Ona after she chose not to come with him for training, but Ona decided to ignore it. He comes back to her very quickly anyway.
Tony is the first to pass, of course. They always present the boy first; Ona doesn’t really understand why. She was hoping to cross Lucy’s path after her interview, but it looks like the people who have already done the interview leave by another door. Tony seems to handle the interview pretty easily; he doesn’t seem stressed at all suddenly. Good for him, Ona thinks.
Some minutes later, it was her turn. Ona takes a big breath when the presenter calls her name. During her walk to the couch in the middle of the television set, Ona tries to spot Alexia in the crowd. She finally sees her just before being in front of the presenter, sitting next to Leila. Alexia winks at her and Ona greets the presenter with one of her brightest smiles. It’s now or never.
“Ona! It’s so nice to finally meet you!”
The presenter has bright but deep blue eyes in a banana hairstyle. He’s wearing make-up, like every single person in the Capitol after all. Ona asked Leila not to paint her face with make-up, she’s wearing some but not too much. It’s pretty simple. She likes it.
She has a small chat about her life in District 8, her family and her friends. She tensed a little bit when she heard him asking the next question.
“So… There is a question everyone here is asking themselves… You are talking a lot about your parents and your brother, but not about someone waiting for you in District 8. Aren’t you in a relationship?”
“No” Ona answer softly. “I’m single.”
“With a pretty face like you? I can’t believe it.”
Ona’s eyes went to Alexia, who nods almost imperceptibly at her. Ona swallows her saliva with a little difficulty.
“I had someone, some months ago. It was my first relationship and my first love.”
“What happened to him?”
The presenter seems really interested in what Ona has to say. He looks a little like an uncle who wants to hear all of your secrets.
“To her” Ona corrects gently.
“Oh, her. Sorry.”
He smiles at her, urging her to continue her confidences. Well, if we can call that confidences if thousands of people are listening to her.
“Two years ago, her name was raffled for the Games. She died in the arena here, in the Capitol.”
There is a beam of silence, no one was expecting this revelation. Ona looks one more time to Alexia, who is still looking right at her. They don’t look at each other for too long though, with professionalism, the presenter finally starts to talk again.
“If I remember correctly, the female tribute of the 8, two years ago, was Jana.”
“Yeah. It was her.”
“And what is your feeling about you being where she was? Do you want to take revenge for her?”
“No” Ona shakes her, softly frowning. “It would be useless; the same people aren’t here, and they only did what they had to do to survive. Jana… She was a dreamer, the sweetest and softest girl ever. She was my sunshine back to the 8. I still think about her every day.”
Ona looks at the hand the presenter puts in her arm, in a soft gesture probably to give her some reconfort. Is it fake or is it real? Ona doesn’t really know.
“Do you have something material in memory from her?”
“Not here” Ona shakes her head one more time. “I left everything in District 8. I thought it would be better for our parents to have them.”
The presenter smiles at her, with the same friendly uncle look as earlier.
“It’s very thoughtful of you. But I know that Capital keeps some things belonging to the Tributes for several years after they come here. Would you want me to find something for you?”
“It would be amazing” Ona smiles.
Her heart beat a little faster at that idea. She can’t say that she’s still in love with Jana, it would be weird. Jana is dead, she isn’t here anymore. But it doesn’t stop Ona to think about it every day anyway.
“I promise I will do everything to do it.”
“Thank you very much.” Ona gives him a new bright smile.
She’s touched, which is probably stupid from her. She doesn’t know if it’s just television and show. She probably won’t see something belonging to Jana, but she likes the idea.
They hug when it’s time for Ona to finish the interview and she greets the crowd with a wave before going behind the curtains once again. She breathes with relief there, feeling relieved and exhausted at the same time. Tony isn’t here anymore, and Ona follows slowly the floor before facing a door. She doesn’t have to open it, someone does it for her.
Two Peacekeepers frame her immediately, taking her in the room she was waiting before coming on set. There, she sits down on the couch, waiting for something. She doesn’t know what, the Peacekeepers haven't said anything to her before leaving.
Alexia will come for her some minutes later, hugging her at length before taking her back to their quarters.
********
Several hours later, after tossing and turning for hours in her bed, Ona decides to get out of her room. She tried to take another shower, but it didn't work. Even the “tea” they give the Tributes to help them sleep isn’t working.
She puts a short and a hoodie on her underwear and slides her feet in the tap shoes lent by the Capitol. She needs to breathe some fresh air, she almost hasn’t since she came here a week ago. There is a place called a garden, which is in fact more like a patio. She went there several times with Alexia or Tony, but they only are allowed twenty minutes per day.
They aren’t authorized to leave their quarters during the night, but she still can pretend to have a panic attack if someone catches her. It wouldn’t be totally wrong though; Ona is pretty sure that her troubles to breathe right now are linked to her difficulty to sleep. In District 8 the air wasn’t maybe very healthy, but she still can breathe fresh air every day.
That patio being in the seven floors, Ona chooses to take the stairs to go there. Like this, she won’t take the risk to wake someone up. She doesn’t see anyone during her walk to the garden, and she’s relieved to see that there is no one here.
Sighing softly, she lies down on one of the deck chairs here. The sky is dark and the more she looks, the more she’s able to watch more stars.
She doesn’t know how much time she stays there, finally feeling her breathing becoming calmer and deeper. She feels better now.
Until she hears some noise coming from behind her and the characteristic sound of an automatic door opening. Ona doesn’t have time to hide, she just has time to turn to face the person coming for her. She was waiting to see a Peacekeeper ready to beat her, but no.
It’s Lucy, who seems scared to face someone here, before realizing that it’s Ona.
“What the hell are you doing here?” Lucy whispers.
“And you?” Ona whispers back.
Lucy's eyes are scanning the place, probably looking for someone else. But there isn’t anyone here, Ona could have said it to Lucy.
“I couldn’t sleep” Lucy finally says.
“Me neither”
They look at each other before Lucy sighs and sits in another deck chair. She’s wearing a grey flannel ensemble with the hood on her head.
“Why can’t you sleep?” Ona asks casually.
It wasn’t probably the question you ask the crush you almost never talked to, but she does it anyway. Lucy seems surprised by the question of Ona, raising her gaze on her. Just when Ona was saying that she can not answer her question, Lucy opens her mouth to answer.
“I don’t know. I was thinking a lot about the trainings, the shows… Everything we went through since we are here.”
Ona nods, understanding perfectly. She doesn’t know how things go for the other Tributes and the other Districts. She has a great team around her, protecting her as much as they can. She’s not to be pitied, but it doesn’t mean that the traumatism isn’t here. She’s preparing for her own death. It’s a strange feeling.
“I saw your interview” Lucy suddenly says. “It was… It touched me.”
It’s Ona turns to raise her gaze on Lucy. She looks at her eyes for some seconds, before shrugging softly.
“Thanks. It was probably the last time I would be able to honor her.”
“She’s lucky.”
“Lucky?”
Ona’s frowning. She doesn’t understand why Lucy might be thinking that, especially knowing the way Jana died.
“To have her memory kept alive by someone like you. People here in the Capitol or in the career District forget the dead Tributes very quickly. It won’t hurt to have someone talking about someone who was here several years ago, just remembering them to people.”
Ona nods, finally understanding what Lucy wants to say. She might admit that she was a little mad about that comment, before Lucy can explain herself. She lets her body relax in understanding, looking at the sky again.
“Were your parents okay with your relationship?” Lucy asks softly.
Ona keeps looking at the stars for several seconds, before looking at Lucy again. It seems like Lucy realized the indiscretion of her question when Ona and her cross their gazes.
“Oh. I’m sorry if it was too straight-forward, of course you don’t need to answer that question” Lucy blunders, and this is the first time Ona sees her uncomfortable. “It’s just like… I don’t know, I feel like we are old friends or something. I’m sorry it was stupid of me.”
Trying to ignore the pleasant warmth in her body when she hears Lucy, Ona decides to get her out of her misery pretty quickly. They aren’t talking a lot; this encounter wasn’t even planned at all. It’s the first time they are talking alone like this. She doesn’t want Lucy to feel uncomfortable.
“I don’t mind your question” Ona assures her.
If they were next to each other, she would probably have put her hand on her leg to support her words. But Lucy is too far from her.
“They knew about Jana and me, and they were ok” Ona begins, smiling softly when she remembers some scene. “Jana and I knew each other from when we were little. I don’t know when things changed or if it was always here. But one day at dinner, my Mom just asked me if Jana was my friend or my girlfriend. I answer that it was my girlfriend, and they just go with it. They never made a big thing with it.”
Lucy nods softly, lost in her thoughts.
“It’s maybe the healthier way to go with it” she says slowly.
“I think so too. I feel like I could have come home with a boy or a girl and they wouldn’t mind. At least I was with someone, not like my brother” Ona rolls her eyes.
“There is a story behind that” Lucy smirks.
Ona laughs softly, shaking her head softly. Lucy was right, this conversation feels like they know each other for years, not only several days. She likes this feeling.
“Him and my best friend have always been in love, I think. They are both too stubborn to see it or maybe they don’t want to do anything because of me, I don’t know. But it’s really painful to watch.”
Lucy smiles at Ona’s rumble, not seeming to mind at all. She has a small smile and some tenderness in her face while looking at Ona. The younger one realizes it and is distracted about it for some seconds, before asking a question too.
“And you? What about your friends and family?”
“Well…”
Lucy opens her mouth to talk, but quickly closes her when they both hear a noise coming from the floor. They both turn in the direction, Lucy even getting up a little.
"Did you take the lift to come here?” Lucy whispers.
“No, I took the stairs. I didn’t want for anyone to hear me” Ona whispers back.
Finally, there isn’t another noise or someone coming. But there is a tension that wasn’t here before. Lucy finally turns in Ona’s direction, looking hesitant.
“Maybe we should go back to our room.”
“I think you’re right”
Ona sighs a little when she gets up from her chair, looking one last time at the stars. She smiles at Lucy when the girl lets her pass before her, turning in her direction when they are at the stairs. Lucy must go down while she has to go up.
“It was nice, talking to you” Ona mumbles, blushing softly.
“It was” Lucy confirms with a smirk. “See you tomorrow?”
“Yeah. See you tomorrow.”
With a wink, Lucy left her to go on the stairs. Ona watches her before going back to her room. She manages to sneak inside before being caught by anyone. Her bed is warm after the cold outside, and the feeling is amazing. She can’t stop smiling, thinking about her moment with Lucy. Her crush won’t probably pass soon, but she doesn’t mind. Lucy seems to be a very nice girl, not only a pretty face. And a hot body.
********
The training goes pretty great. Alexia is able to come to see them trains from time to time and is able to see what their qualities are. For Ona, she realizes that she has a big facility for climbing. Her small body is still strong and agile, and she doesn't have trouble passing from one place to another.
So, for her showcase, Alexia proposed to her to impress the jury with that. They designed a parkour with trees that Ona crossed in a record time. For fun, some members of the jury tried it, just to see they are way slower than Ona. They give her a 7 for that. Tony got an 8, just like Lucy. Those are pretty good notes.
But it’s not what filled Ona with happiness those past days. After her encounter with Lucy in the “garden”, she decides to go back the night before. Lucy was already there, waiting for her like it was planned for them to meet again.
They talk a lot here, about anything and everything. The training, their Partner, their team or what is on their mind at the time. Ona loves those moments together and how they are getting close to each other. They both decided to hide their friendship though, not wanting to become a target for the other tributes.
On the four nights, they are even on the same desk chair, partially hidden by a big flower box and a massive palm tree.
“You look tired tonight” Lucy says.
They already are here for one hour, talking about the food from home they are missing for the last ten minutes.
“I am. I usually sleep more than that” Ona admits.
“We can raincheck for tomorrow if you prefer”
Something in Lucy’s voice might make her think that Lucy doesn’t like that idea, but it bothers Ona to imagine wasting some time alone with Lucy.
“No. I like those moments” Ona frowns, looking at the older girl. “Those are the moments I love the most during my day”
Lucy giggles softly, rolling her eyes.
“I would be sad if you would rather fight than see me.”
Ona smiles only, looking at the stars again. With time, she learned that Lucy knows almost all the stars and constellations. Her grandfather told her when she was younger, he was a fishman and used the sky to go home at night with his boat. It’s almost the only things Lucy told her about her family, but Ona never pushed her to talk about them. She knows that it might hide something, and she doesn’t want to make Lucy uncomfortable.
“I heard that they let us call someone from home” Lucy whispers after some minutes of silence.
“What?” Ona says, her heart beating faster. “How do you know that?”
“I’ve got my sources.”
“Will it be filmed?”
“I think, they don’t have any advantage to offer that otherwise.”
Ona stays silent, thinking of who she would call. She thought about her parents and brother, of course. Her brother might be a good call, he probably could give her some advice. But hearing her mother’s voice for the last time is something she wants too. But on the other hand, she doesn’t want to choose between her parents, she feels like it’s unfair for her dad.
“Who would you call?” Ona asks Lucy.
The older girl stays silenced, looking at the stars. Ona almost believes that Lucy hasn’t heard her and was about to ask her question again, just when Lucy opens her mouth to answer.
“I don’t know. Maybe my brother.”
She seems sad with this answer. Ona frowns, turning on her side to have a better look at Lucy. The moon makes her face shine softly, just like her beautiful eyes. Ona feels like she can look at her all day without being tired of it. But she knows she has to be discreet not to pass for a creep.
“And you?”
Lucy gives her the question back, which isn’t surprising. Ona frowns softly trying to figure out her different possibilities.
“Maybe my best friend” Ona finally answers.
Lucy hums softly, still looking at the stars. Ona takes advantage of it to keep looking at her. She tries to oblige her eyes not to fall too long and too often on Lucy’s lips. Her crush gets stronger every day and she doesn’t know how long she can keep it under control.
“You seem sad” Ona finally says.
It strangely makes Lucy smile and she turns her head towards Ona. She seems to realize only now how close they are from each other.
“My family is a little bit complicated, that’s all. Don’t worry about me.”
Ona frowns once again, keep looking at Lucy. She has gained a little confidence since she and Lucy started hanging out together.
“Would you listen to me if I told you something like that?”
“Probably not” Lucy laughs softly.
Ona doesn’t answer anything, she just raises both of her eyebrows and turns her head to look at the sky again. It’s a nice day today, the sky is clear. Yesterday they weren’t able to see any of the stars.
“Do you find it strange? That we get along so well considering the circumstances?” Ona asks suddenly.
“No. I think we’ll get along too if we have met somewhere else. Or in another life…”
“In another life…” Ona repeat for herself.
She feels sad, suddenly. She hasn’t felt that way since the beginning and she has trouble explaining this sudden wave of feeling. It is almost intoxicating and like this other day in the car, she has trouble breathing correctly. She tries to settle her breathing not to alert Lucy.
“Hey, are you ok?”
Try again, Ona.
She nods, but despite that, Lucy stands a little on the chair, not to be lying anymore. She sits and faces Ona, putting a hand on her stomach. Ona feels shivers despite herself, and she almost hates her body to react that way while she’s not far from a panic attack.
“Look at me” Lucy says softly. “And breathe with me.”
She takes Ona’s hand with the one she hasn’t on her stomach, just to put it on her stomach too. Looking deep in Lucy’s eyes, Ona finally manages to breathe normally again after several minutes.
“You’re okay” Lucy keeps repeating.
It’s not totally true, but Ona doesn’t answer anything. Right now, with Lucy, she is ok. She feels safe. She has to focus on this.
“Thanks” Ona finally whispers.
“Anytime.”
There is a sincerity behind Lucy’s words which can seem strange because of their situation. But Ona wants to believe her.
They look at each other for several times, before Lucy opens her mouth to say something.
“Ona, I- “
She’s cute by a big noise, making both of them jump in the air. They both know that it sounds like the end of their meeting for tonight.
“We better go” Lucy says.
Ona groans for any answer, sitting on the chair too. She doesn’t want to, but she knows it’s better for them. Once again, they won’t do anything to them here, but they can easily make things look like an accident.
“I’m going first” Lucy decides.
Ona nods and sighs, standing up too. She watches when Lucy turns around to look at her again and froze when the dark-haired girl leans on her to put a kiss on her cheek. Pretty close from her lips.
“See you tomorrow night”
And then, she’s not here anymore. Ona needs several seconds to come back to reality and finally leave the garden too. She goes to her quarter silently, lost in her thoughts. She wasn’t expecting to see someone in her bedroom when she arrives, so much that she misses the silhouette of the person here.
“Where the fuck were you?!”
Ona jumps out of her skin and jumps so much that she knocks her head against the door of the room. The lights go on and Alexia is standing in the middle of the room, arm crossed and a very angry expression on her face.
“When Tony told me that you were leaving your room in the middle of the night, I didn’t want to believe him. I told myself that you weren’t this stupid and unconscious. You better have to have a good explanation, Ona.”
Tony. Of course he will open his damn mouth. And how does he know that Ona was leaving her room? That’s pretty strange in Ona’s opinion.
“How does he know that?” Ona frowns.
“That wasn’t my point here.”
Alexia seems really furious. Ona swallows her saliva with difficulty and shrugs, suddenly not able to look at her Mentor. She’s not screaming but she’s talking so coldly that Ona would have preferred the first possibility.
“I’m fighting for you, Ona. I try to make you look good for sponsors and attract good attention to you. But if people learn that you don’t comply with the rules here, you are a lost case. We don’t laugh with rules in the Capitol. If you do bad things, it’s not only you who will have something to repair, but your family too. And if they know I protected you, they will go for my family.”
It suddenly attracts Ona’s attention again. She never thought that they could go after her family for something she did. She’s suddenly scared, and Alexia is probably easily seeing that on her face.
“Please, don’t say anything to the Leaders.”
“I’m asking you one last time, Ona. Where were you?”
Ona bites her lip. She doesn’t want to drag Lucy into her problems. She can’t believe that Tony snitched like this.
“I was in the garden. It’s where I go” Ona finally answers.
“Alone?”
There is another silence, while Ona thinks again about telling the truth or not. She doesn’t want to lose Alexia’s trust, but she cares so much for Lucy.
“I don’t want her to have any problem” Ona finally whispers.
“I won’t tell anyone” Alexia says.
Still chewing her lip, Ona raises her eyes again on Alexia. She wasn’t able to realize it, but Alexia’s gaze softened those last seconds. She seems happy to hear the truth and Ona saying it. Maybe Alexia already knows everything.
“I was with Lucy”
Alexia looks at her for several seconds and sighs finally, before pinching her nose.
“Teenagers” she grumbles before looking at Ona again. “Go to bed.”
She passes next to Ona to leave the room. Ona feels uneasy. She hates conflict, fights and arguments. She hates the fact that Alexia might be disappointed about her, or even upset.
“Alexia…”
The blonde was closing the door behind her but still slid her head through the gap of the door. She looks at Ona with her hazel eyes and Ona has trouble looking at her while talking. But she still does.
“I’m sorry. For disappointing you and making you mad at me.”
Alexia seems to soften finally completely and comes into the room again. She takes the time to close the door again before talking.
“I’m not disappointed in you, Ona. But between you and Tony, you are my favorite from far away. I would be mad if you get yourself in trouble because you go flirting with another Tribute at night. You have to be careful about yourself.”
Ona nods once again and is surprised when Alexia hugs her. She hugs her back, her nose somewhere on the other girl’s shoulder.
“Be careful with Tony, okay? I don’t like his comportment with you.”
“How does he know that I’m leaving at night?” Ona asks again.
Alexia sighs and lets go of Ona before answering.
“He said he was hungry and wanted something to eat when he saw you leaving. I really want to believe him. If it’s not that, he’s spying on you and it’s really disturbing.”
It is. Ona feels her stomach twist in a way that is everything but good. Why in the world would he spying on her? To know what she’s doing? Or is he spying on her for someone else?
“Don’t worry. I’ll have an eye on him, ok? Now try to sleep, you still have training tomorrow.”
“Yeah. Thank you.”
Alexia smiles softly and leaves the room for good this time. After a quick shower, Ona goes to bed. Once again, her mind is full, between Alexia’s revelations and what happened with Lucy in the garden.
Sure, it was just a kiss on the cheek. But she can’t forget the feeling she got when Lucy’s lips were on her skin. The perfection of her smell, the softness of Lucy’s lips. She’s smiling like a fool when she finally manages to fall asleep, not wanting to consider for now if she will be able to see Lucy at night again. Maybe they’ll find another way to be together. They have to.
Next Chapter
#woso imagine#woso fanfics#ona batlle#ona batlle imagine#lucy bronze#ona batlle x lucy bronze#ona battle#lucy and ona#lucy bronze x ona batlle#woso x hunger games
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demi god LU time
the law of hyperfixations says you must combine interests at every given chance
adding a cut here as to not clog feeds!! its a real long post
i wanna hear thoughts too! so dont be afraid to comment. these are my personal opinions and i wanna hear if anyone agrees or disagrees :D (apologies for all the tags btw)
edit to add the stupid doodle

the gods all have favorites, and ironically none of them are their own kids (save for hades: he loves his kid. doesn't make him a good parent, but you know?)
In a more Zelda timeline abiding setting; Originally they weren't all at camp halfblood at the same time, but time shenanigans decided they were to be brought together
Imagine Chiron’s surprise when 7 of his dead campers waltz into camp (this happens EVERY SINGLE TIME they enter camp. Dionysus is completely unfazed, knowing the bs time shit the gods are dealing with atm)
By the time they enter camp in Wild’s Hyrule for the second time he kinda understands (Wind and Sky didnt have a Camp Halfblood, for the record, for obvious reasons)
Alternatively, its some form of modern au where they’re just from different parts of Hyrule (skyloft, downfall, ordonia, windfall peninsula, hyrule town (different from castle town), the list goes on) which would make a lot more sense for this kinda au (the world would’ve just had a LOT of calamities within the span of a few years, some of the heroes knowing about camp and others not so much)
(i think Legend, Wars, Time, Wind (post WW) and Four would’ve known about Camp Halfblood while the others were just kinda on their own until after their quests) meaning over half of them didn’t have prophecies and just went to deal with the issue themselves, possibly meaning on their journey they learned of camp
Ok well, all of them but Wars, who grew up at Camp Halfblood
All Zelda’s are children of Athena, save for Skyward Sword Zelda since she's the reincarnation of Hylia (yeah, im keeping the original Zelda goddesses! What of it?)
At some point fairly early on, a Zelda only had a son, who got together with Athena at some point and boom
Sky: child of Zeus
self explanatory
God of the skies? his name is literally Sky
not to mention how fucking powerful he is?
he was the "first" Link; Zeus was technically the first God, it makes sense (this is such a stupid reason)
The skies are his home, Zeus finding someone on Skyloft and “falling in love” with their love of the sky too results in this bad boy right here
The demise fight? Only a zeus kid could harbor lightning like that
A camp counselor in the modern setting (ik typically once you’re 18, you’re no longer a camper really, but shhhh)
Wind: child of Poseidon
Don't roll your eyes, i've got a reason!!
the 4 wind gods throw a fit anytime he's sent on a quest (they all love him even if they won't admit it)
A world purely ocean and islands? Poseidon would have a fuckin ball
The Great Sea needed a hero, Wind was brought about more for necessity than out of the want to have a child (this leaves a hard disconnect between wind and the gods, knowing his dad didn’t really have him out of love for his mom but because the world needed to be saved)
The irony of Poseidon being the patron of pegasi and horses and Wind not knowing what a horse is will never not be a funny thought
Has more control over the wind than he does the sea (for now)
he, like Legend, pointedly ignores that he's a demi-god, especially since he comes after the Hero of Time (kinda hard to live up to that, even outside of a demi-god au)
The ocean and winds are his mood ring: you upset him the wind gods are after you
In a modern setting, the same reason applies kinda; a quest under the sea would be virtually impossible for anyone but a child of Poseidon, and hell knows a cyclopes isnt gonna be sent (gotta love those prophecies)
OR!! OR AND HEAR ME OUT
Wind isnt a demigod
The wind gods still adore him, but he doesn't have the hero’s spirit and i think that’d kinda translate to not being a demigod, yet still being the one who was destined to go on the quest because there just weren't any demigods to do it
Still not set on which id go with
Legend: child of Hades
Ah yes, child of the big three goes on so many quests trope. Love to see it
he's Apollo's favorite favorite (Warriors is jealous as hell. Thats his dad! Wdym he likes Legend more????)
Pointedly ignores the fact he's a demigod (at least, he definitely tries to)
Blessed by (and beefing with) so many gods from his quests
probably one of the few heroes who's spoken to their godly parent (trust me, it was out of obligation rather than free will)
Prefers helping out the more minor, underappreciated, and not as needy or bitchy gods (like Hestia, for example)
curses the Olympians constantly, they've learned to ignore him, hes their best questing kid
Sort of a general camp counselor since Hades doesn't really have kids (its technically his last year but hes been there the longest out of everyone)
Managed to block the oracle over iris message
After his trip to the dark world and lorule, the gods go haywire around him, much to his delight (because it means they leave him alone)
Hyrule: child of Hecate
adopted by Hermes (much to the dismay of all the Hermes children)
I was on the line between Hecate, Apollo, and Hermes; Hyrule’s affinity for magic and the blood curse resulted in Hecate to win
Very detached from the gods, the help he receives is never outright but more subtle blessings
The gods like to ignore Downfall after Legend died tbh (outside of modern, obviously)
Well, they still ignore Downfall as a city/country.
Only learned of camp thanks to Legend, otherwise he wouldn’t have had a clue it existed
Wild: child of Athena
Also adopted by Hermes
One of the more chaotic children of Athena
The idea of Athena being his godly parent sourced from his resourcefulness and quick battle (or just general) strategies, along with his pre-calamity self being stoic and more on the critical side
Completely forgot he was a demigod and just let loose, Athena is more than slightly perturbed by him and yet so infatuated
Supervises archery at camp
Warriors: child of Apollo
exemplifies almost 0 traits of his father other than his looks and his affinity for medicine (shit archer, shit musician, can't write poetry)
blessed by Athena during the war since he was struggling so much, she always has a soft spot for the heros since they fight to protect her daughters so hard (aka pity blessing)
Actively beefing with Ares
Aphrodite likes to keep an eye on him, mostly for entertainment (she woulda eaten the whole Cia debacle UP)
Very notorious in camp considering he was a war captain at the ripe age of 17; once learning of the whole Camp Jupiter has apartments and college for half bloods insisted and led a project at CHB to get something similar built (which is where he, Sky and Twilight stay after turning 18)
Twilight: child of Demeter
His love for ranch animals and caring for his farm lead me to this decision
Also the whole wolf thing, that also counts
Appalled by the fact Wind doesn't know what a horse is considering he's literally the son of Poseidon (jealous the kid can talk to Epona and he can't)
After his journey to the twilight, the gods kinda flicker between Greek and Roman around him so they tend to avoid him like Legend
blessed/cursed by Lupa, hence the wolf thing
Teaches foraging lessons at camp
Four: child of Hephaestus
He's the smithy, I couldn’t not say he's a Hephaestus kid
received a lot less help from the gods since he was one of the first
started advocating that heros receive help from the divine after LU concludes so those after him have a fighting chance (not in the modern setting)
I havent played many of his games, but the kinstones sound like a thing Hephaestus would scatter across the earth as scrap from his creations
Not one of the fire wielders (the only one that can wield fire is Red when split, mostly because of the elemental bs in minish cap)
After drawing the Four Sword, Janus (despite being roman (i like to think the four sword would be a roman artifact, it just feels right)) was suddenly pretty interested and bestowed what wisdom he had for the demi-god
Vulcan, Neptune, Aeolus, and Ceres all came together to forge the elemental stones; the Minish were still the ones to bestow the sword to Hylian people
The gods tend to avoid him too, for the same reason they avoid Twilight and Legend (dark world shenanigans and the Four Sword)
He loves the damn forge at CHB, and was ecstatic seeing the one at Camp Jupiter
He was asked by Chiron if he would be interested in running a forge class for young demigods (be it his siblings or anyone interested) but sadly declined
Has that air of responsibility to him, being a seasoned quester (and while his 3 doesn't stand to Legend’s 6, its still pretty sizable) hes looked up to by the younger campers
Time: child of Demeter Kronos?
The Kokiri were so Demeter core dont even tell me they werent
I guess they’d kinda act like nymphs and dryads in a sense??
His abilities use to relate to his mother until the events of his first quest: the Ocarina of Time was designed to slowly corrupt the user, being a creation of Kronos’
However, it wasn’t really designed with a demigod in mind sooo…
Also self explanatory, the titan of time? Duh… huh?? what do you mean he was taken over?? What do you mean he was a child of Demeter?? No he wasnt lol that Neverrr happened
the reason he's the only “child” of a titan is mainly because of the fierce deity mask literally making him god-like, meaning he has a lot more power harbored in him sooo (the second he dawned that mask he discarded his old identity for that of a titan’s child, since it was also cursed object)
Don’t ask how he came to being Kronos’ kin, no one knows, not even he does (I do) (no, it does not imply a Hylian wandered into Tarturus and got out alive to have the baby)
Avoids interacting with the gods at all costs, he's weary of them as they are of him (even if he saved the world twice)
Extras :)
Ravio: child of Pluto
blessed by Minerva for his natural quick witted nature and clever war strategies, if her own daughter can't succeed she might as well make sure ONE does
can tell if a rupee is real or not by glance alone
Sheerow scares the fuck out of the gods, which in turn means Ravio puts them on edge, a thing very few can achieve
the gods never gave him much thought until the events of albw, to which he suddenly gained like four pair of godly eyes on him
can and will plan one of the worlds most successful heists, refuses to participate
also beefing with Ares (not Mars, Ares)
Based on my personal HC that Ravio’s some sort of artificer (be it replicating magic dungeon items or just flat out creating new ones) i think Vulcan has his eyes on him too
Hilda: child of Minerva
by far the strangest child Minerva ever birthed
exemplifies the traits of a hero rather than a ruler
a little jealous her mother likes Ravio more than her
gods be damned, she's not going to let them neglect her kingdom anymore
a force of fucking nature that single handedly forced a meeting with the gods and somehow forced them to agree to start restoring Lorule (she got the idea from Legend, who has done this multiple times for multiple different reasons)
#linked universe#do i tag them all individually??#umm#ig so#lu legend#lu four#lu sky#lu au#lu time#lu twilight#man this feels obnoxious#lu wind#lu wild#lu hyrule#lu warriors#lu ravio#i included him because he deserves to be included#my 2k word blabbing#my art#text post
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intro <3






hesitant alien gifs by @beanzbyartificalmeans
Hi!! u can call me Axl, Zero, lolo, Jon, or Corey (or literally anything like call me egg idgaf) (yes I collect online names like Pokemon cards let me live)
im 13, my pronouns are she/they/he/it, im genderfluid and bisexual!
my pinterest (shit kicked me out so I ain't on there no more💔)
Oc/au/future fanfic blog side blog is @axl-gets-creative,
mcr ecosystem blog is @mcr-as-dumb-lil-sillys
mcr ask blog is @get-your-revenge
certified victorian gay twink, girlboygenderfuckersomething, and cunt dracula 🗣️🗣️
im caninekin, felinekin (questioning otherhearted ok those tho) and vampirekin! also kinda species flux
I also age regress and age dream a little bit!
my current hyperfixation is my chemical romance so i post a lot abt them lol, my side fixations r nu metal n stranger things!
bands/singers i fw: nirvana, mcr, gnr, melanie martinez (I know she has controversy but I just like her music pls spare me mercy), marina, lana del rey, limp bizkit, korn, slipknot, tv girl, gerard way, frank iero, smashing pumpkins, olivia rodrigo, hole, soad, ptv, p!atd, fob, finn wolfhard (solo work), dove cameron, david bowie, kittie, the beatles, calpurnia, the aubreys, jack off jill, mitski, leathermouth, pencey prep, weezer, and prolly like WAYYYYYY more i cant think of rn lol
other fandom im in/interests i have: raggedy ann and andy, stranger things, unholyverse (haven't finished reading yet bc I tooka break but I'll lock in and continue it one day I swear), the true lives of the fabulous kiljoys (comics), wednesday (Netflix series), the addams family in general, aerial acrobatics, dance, singing, art, and more prolly i cant remember
my quotev acc is "PARTY POISON" but im not on there much lol

Slightly important stuff below 👩🦲
DNI? Never heard of her, I block whoever I don't like so if u a creep think before interacting :)
BYI: if ur saying smth that u think could be taken the wrong way pls use tone tags!
DNF: porn blogs, any of those "gofundme" blogs, any hate blogs, main blogs with side blogs of the previous factors etc,
Any asks I get that I either find offensive, don't know how to answer, don't want to answer, or asks for donations will get deleted or ignored, but if ur someone who's chill and I don't answer ur ask don't take it personally! ^^
I have no shame, I will like anything I like idgaf if it's wrong I'm never shutting my likes off 💥 (edit: so I have shut my likes off...)
things to know: i frequently make suggestive posts and reblogs! This includes gore, posts with sexual themes, etc! I cuss a lot too
Rudeness and hate is not tolerated on this blog, if you don't like something or have a difference in opinion, whether it's with me or someone else on this blog, please keep it to yourself and stay respectful. Thx!
and i think that should be it, if theres any thing else u think is suggestive or needs to be listed here pls tell me! <3
Ok bye 👅














#my tags ->#axl says trans rights#<- general posts#zero speaks absolute nonsense#<- stupid shitposts idk#helena's canon events#<- things that are happening in real time or that happened in my life#axl answers <3#<- ask tag#zero reads unholyverse 💥#<- me reading unholyverse (kinda on hold bc i took a break from reading it)#alien baby appreciation 👅#<- appreciation posts for my followers <3#tags r like- HIGHKEY unorganized so erm *explodes*#Spotify
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Napping With An Outlaw
~ A special edition of Naps With Copia ~
For @da-rulah 💙 who requested a special nap with cowboy!Mary Goore
Mary Goore x Reader
While obviously not Copia this is similar to the Naps With Copia series. Just a nice soft nap with the cowboy!Mary Goore from my fic The Cardinal's Bride. You do not need to read that at all to enjoy this!
Warnings: Brief descriptions of blood and stitches, Mary is a terrible patient (and a tease), sfw, 1,400 words (thank you to @gothdaddyissues for the dividers!)
“What the hell, Goore?!”
You had finally finished with your shift in the saloon. A long day of filling drinks and slapping hands away when they got too close. All you wanted was to wash off and crawl into bed. A bed that you had been daydreaming about for most of the day. Except right now your bed was occupied with the last person you wanted to see.
Especially since they were bleeding everywhere.
“Hey there, sweetheart.”
“Don’t ‘sweetheart’ me, Goore. Why are you here?” You took a few steps closer, your eyes widening a bit when you saw the gash on their head. “And what the fuck happened?”
“Ran into an old friend.” When you crossed your arms and raised an eyebrow at him Mary sighed, “We had a little disagreement.”
“I can tell. So, why are you here ruining my sheets?” Mary looked a little sheepish then, picking at a tear on their pants before looking back up at you. “The pout isn’t gonna work on me, Goore.”
“What will?”
“Nothing. I am tired. Too tired to deal with you bleeding all over my things. Get out.”
“Oh come on! You owe me!”
“Like hell I do, remember a few months ago when you came crawling back here after running into that Cardinal guy again?” Mary winced and became very interested in the hole in his pants again. “You’re kidding me.”
“This time wasn’t my fault.”
“Uh huh.” You sighed and took a few steps closer, reaching out to prod at the wound on Mary’s head. They hissed and tried to jerk away but you grabbed their chin to keep them still. “Stop being a baby.”
“Stop poking me!”
“Do you want my help or not?” Mary finally relented, staying still and leaning into you a little bit. “Thank you. Geez Mary, did you get hit by a rock or something?”
“A frying pan.”
“A fry–you know what, I don’t wanna know. Alright, lean back ok? I’m going to go get some clean water and the sewing kit from the Doc.”
You ignored Mary’s groan, quickly leaving your room and heading down the hall. The Doc would be down at the tables this time of the night so it was easy to slip into his room and grab his kit. After getting a job here it wasn’t long before you were helping out all over the place. While the town was relatively quiet there still was the odd bar fight or even a random shoot out from time to time. Enough action to warrant hiring someone just in case.
When you made it back to your room Mary was still on your bed. For a moment you were frozen, worried that they had been hurt a lot worse than you had thought. You dropped the kit and rushed over to your bed, your hands landing on Mary’s chest and shaking him. Mary wasn’t yours by any means, you had no doubt Mary never had trouble finding a warm bed no matter where they were. But that didn’t stop your heart from plummeting when you thought they might be gone.
It didn’t stop you from wishing things were different.
“Ow, ow, ow! What the shit?!” Mary shook themselves awake, immediately swatting at your hands to get you to stop shaking him. “I am injured here! You’re supposed to be fixing me, not making things worse!”
Pinching their nipple wasn’t something the Doc would recommend but hearing Mary’s indignant squawk was worth it.
“Just making sure you’re alive.”
You smiled when Mary groaned and dropped back against the bed. They had definitely been through the ringer, whatever had happened. You couldn’t imagine an outlaw such as The Cardinal using a frying pan of all things, but you supposed anything could be a weapon in the right hands. Mary was thankfully still when you began cleaning the wound on their forehead. The blood was caked in their hair so you did your best to clean it without having a tub to dunk them in.
Maybe you could talk them into a bath tomorrow.
“That feels nice.” They were practically purring as you let your fingers rub against their scalp, trying to avoid the gash. It would definitely need at least a few stitches. “I knew I came to the right place.”
“I’m glad you came here too.” That got you a lazy smile, the one that had lured you into Mary’s orbit to begin with. “Time for the stitches.”
Mary whimpered, clenching their eyes shut as you got to work. The gash wasn’t that bad but you knew how vain Mary could be. It would look a lot better after this and they’d certainly whine about it a lot less. The whole thing was over in a few minutes and after tugging Mary into a sitting position you helped them out of their shirt to clean up the rest of them as best you could.
“Mmm, I knew you’d try to get me out of my clothes.”
“You caught me, Goore. That’s what I wanted to do the minute I saw you in my bed.”
“Anything else?” Mary grunted when you tugged on their boots, chucking them across the room so you wouldn’t trip on them in the morning. Their pants were next and you groaned with the effort it took to tug the stupidly tight things off their legs. “Well, sweetheart?”
Mary was grinning at you, the only thing covering them the sheet they had pulled over their lap. It was an attempt at modesty you weren’t used to, typically Mary spent most of their time in your room naked. Not that you minded but it was pretty obvious by the way Mary was squinting and the yawn they just let out that Mary was in no condition for anything but a thorough cuddle.
“Actually yeah, there’s one other thing I’d like to do with you.” Mary kept the grin as you moved closer, their hands going to your waist when you got onto the bed next to them. You leaned forward and pressed a kiss over the stitches before dropping a few more across their face. The strength seemed to leave Mary’s body then and you wrapped your arms around their shoulders and tugged them back down onto the bed. “Let’s take a nap.”
“That’s not very sexy.”
“Neither is having you bleed everywhere.”
“Not bleeding any more.”
“Yeah but it’s hard to kiss you when you’re yawning constantly.”
“Other things besides my mouth you cou–ow! Fine! Ok, ok I’m sorry.” Mary let out a pained groan when you pulled your fingers away. “Pinching an injured man, does Doc do that?”
“No, but he also doesn’t kiss his patients either.” You reached down and pulled the blanket up over you both, your eyes trailing over Mary’s body as it disappeared underneath the fabric. They had some new scars since you saw them last and you made a note to ask about them whenever Mary was feeling better. For right now rest was the most important thing. “Go to sleep Mary.”
“Hmm, I guess.” They wiggled around in your bed, wrapping their arms around you and tugging you so your back was against their chest. Mary’s breath ruffled the hair next to your ear making you shiver. Their arms tightened around you in response and you couldn’t help but smile, letting yourself relax and enjoy the feeling. “Will you be here when I wake up?”
Mary’s voice was muffled against so you turned your head to try and catch their eyes.
“What?”
Those gorgeous green eyes of his sluggishly opened and they gave you a lazy smile before repeating themselves.
“When I wake up? You still gonna be here?”
“Of course, Mary.” They let out a soft hum, tugging you back against their chest. You felt their breath evening out as they began to fall asleep and while you were tired yourself you couldn’t help but tease them one last time. “It’s my bed anyway.”
It was Mary’s turn to pinch you, quickly followed by his fingers digging into your sides and tickling you. After you screeched trying to get away an unfortunately aimed elbow had him groaning and demanding mercy. You turned in Mary’s arms, humming as you brushed their hair out of their face.
“Terrible bedside manner.”
“My sincerest apologies, Mr. Goore.” You kissed their pouting lips, their cheeks and their forehead until Mary settled down again, their breath evening out once more. Right when you were on the edge of sleep yourself you smiled against Mary’s chest, murmuring a promise into their skin before sleep took you, “I’ll make it up to you tomorrow.”
~ Naps With Copia series masterpost ~
If you'd like to be added/removed from the tag list (or if I accidentally left your name off) of this fic or any of my others please leave a comment or send me a dm! Thank you 💙
My Masterlist ~ My Archive of our Own ~ My Ko-Fi Tip Jar
#my fics#my writing#naps with copia#cowboy mary goore#mary goore x gn reader#mary goore x reader#mary goore fanfiction#mary goore fanfic#reader insert#the cardinal's bride
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So I’m a bit hooked on husband!Joaquin now 😶 could you write something a little angsty (they have an argument about Joaquin not checking in as consistently as he promised/wife working more to take her mind off of him being in danger all the time)? She tries to take off to get space and gets drunk at a bar and you can do what you would like next with the story. I’m just excited to see what you write ❤️❤️❤️
Check In ~ Joaquín Torres
synopsis: One argument, one creep at the bar, one apology, but two lovers
tw: fem!reader, husband!Joaquín, angst, reader gets harassed by creep at a bar, happy ending, barely edited.
fic, ficlet, drabble, request
Hi, Sid!! I'm glad someone else is just in love with husband!Joaquín as I am!!
➽──────────────❥
You knew what it meant when Joaquín asked you to marry him, it would be the same as now. You'd be worried about his safety and if he would even come back. But you loved him, you loved Joaquín so much that you said yes and married him anyway.
You hated fighting but Joaquín promised that he would call and check in more often than he was. You were even sure what was said, but you knew that Joaquín had to leave before the argument was over and could be resolved. So you threw yourself into work, you worked more and ignored when Joaquín would call to check in. You would only answer when you deemed it to be convenient or when you got back home.
✧°˖ . ݁˖︵‿❀‿︵˖ . ݁˖°✧
You were at the bar down the street from your work, you got off early that Friday and knew that Joaquín was probably waiting at home for you. You weren't ready to see him and go back to fighting, to having non constructive conversations. You knew you were drunk, not too much that you didn't know what was happening, but enough to no longer be as angry. That's when a man approached you, his smile too sharp and wide to be friendly. "What's a pretty lady like you doing alone?"
"I'm married," you slurred a bit and he laughed.
"Your husband doesn't have to know, he probably won't care. Why else would he leave such a pretty little lady like you all alone and drunk?" The man reached out to brush your hair off your shoulder and running down your chest before he rudely cupped your breast. You flinched back, you weren't sure what to say but thankfully you didn't have to.
"I do know and I do care," Joaquín's voice was soothing to you, even when you were upset with him. You looked over at him with glassy eyes, you wanted to throw yourself in his arms but you felt too dirty after how the man touched you. "I suggest you walk away from my wife before I do something I'd rather not have to," Joaquín raised his eye brow as he slowly stepped closer to the man.
"Whatever, man. She ain't that pretty anyway," he mumbled before walking off, you wanted to sob. The alcohol and emotions from the encounter making you overwhelmed.
"Come on, let's go home," Joaquín said, throwing money on the counter.
"I already paid," you mumbled but Joaquín didn't care, he was more worried about the tears running down your face. He frowned at the sight and made the mental note to ask in the car. "How'd you know I was here?"
"Sam was taking me home and I saw your car in the parking lot," Joaquín said, leading you to the car. You climbed into the passenger seat and slumped against the window. You didn't look at Joaquín when he got in and started the car, you just stared out the window and cried. You were almost home when you finally couldn't handle the silence.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry for letting him touch me," you sobbed, your guilt eating you alive. "I didn't do anything but tell him I'm married. Maybe if I had said that I wasn't interested he wouldn't have-" Joaquín cut you off by harshly pulling into the driveway.
"No," Joaquín firmly said, turning to look at you. "No, this is not your fault, ok? He's the one that should be apologizing," Joaquín told you, his eye blazing.
"But," you wanted to argue but you didn't have the heart to continue. "Thank you for not being mad at me," you whispered, wrapping your arms around your middle as your insecurities started to get louder.
"Let's go inside," Joaquín sighed and you nodded, you were slowly getting more sober. You followed Joaquín into the house, your vision blurry as you cried. You sat down on the couch and stripped the shirt you were wearing off, it left you in nothing but your pants and bra.
"Will you let me burn that shirt?" You asked, scared to even wear it again. Joaquín said nothing as he sat down next to you, he held his hands out and you took them.
"Y/n, I'm not mad at you. I wasn't mad when I left and I'm not mad now. I know I said I'd check in when I could and I know I've been slacking on it. And I am so so sorry about that, but I am not mad," Joaquín said, looking you in the eyes so you could see the seriousness in them.
"I'm sorry for yelling," you whispered. "I'm sorry for not being more understanding about your check ins, I know you're a busy man," you sighed, your tears still flowing. "And I'm sorry for letting that man-" Joaquín cut you off with a gentle hand squeeze.
"You do not need to apologize for another man's actions, ok? I trust you and I know you wouldn't let that happen normally. I know you love me because you show me everyday, and because you married me," Joaquín said. You broke at his words and hugged him, burying your face in his neck as you sobbed a little more. "Do you want to shower? I'll make dinner and we can watch whatever movie you want," Joaquín offered and you nodded into his neck but made no move to leave his embrace. Joaquín wasn't going to force you to move, not until you were ready, but he knew he needed to actually have a conversation about how to fix his check in problem when you weren't drunk and your emotions were so high. For now, he would hold you while you soaked up the comfort before making you both dinner and curling up on the couch together.
➽──────────────❥
Masterlist | Requests If you want to be added to the tag list, follow the directions on my masterlist
#joaquin torres#joaquin torres x reader#joaquin torres x you#mcu#marvel mcu#cabnw#cabnw spoilers#danny ramirez#danny ramirez x reader
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The people have asked so here are my thoughts of the tournament!! Please enjoy~ 💫
Why a fashion tournament?
Ok so confession time: i actually had the fashion tournament idea for... someone else (ˉ▽ˉ;)........(ㆆxㆆ) hehe
But I like Ciel just as much!! o(≧口≦)o And I always planned to do one for him eventually. In the end, I decided to do his first, because I thought it would be more fun for the fandom. And I didn't want to wait until the manga starts again and worry about new outfits. Turns out my foresight was spot on~ (´∀`;)
Making the tournament
So as you all can guess, this is my first tournament I've put together! There were a few bumps along the way, but it was fun ride the whole time! I really struggled with the banners at the start. I'm haunted by that first one, it was sooo bad (>ლ). I'm glad I've gotten better at designing them now tho:
I really liked this one I did for the submission form.
But ig my promoting didn't reallly work? (-_-)... I think at the most, only two people submitted to our form. But I'm really grateful towards them! If it weren't for those submissions I probably would have given up, so everyone say thank you!🎉🎉
Second confession! I know literally nothing about fashion ( ꩜///꩜;). So imagine how much of a struggle it was writing up all the propaganda. Technically, I could have left it alone... but because of the few submissions we received did get propaganda, I felt bad to erase them so I... wrote propaganda for the rest of the 132 outfits... yeah... 🙃
That's also the reason why I didn't hide the propaganda under a read-more link because I wanted yall to read it. I didn't waste nights hunched over my laptop to be ignored!! (also why this isn't under a read more hehe)
Finding all those images were quite hard as well! Most of these outfits I remembered, but locating them? And finding good resolutions? (´□`; 三 ;´□`). I also had to reformat them to fit side by side on the post, which took a lot of editing day-by-day (I sure was glad when we hit final bracket....)
But enough about me, lets talk about the tournament!!
Tournament polls
I had so much fun making them. The outfits were assorted randomly, but I did make some pairings for fun (lion vs cat, turkey vs rooster).
Looking at the final competiors of the brackets, it seems the fandom really likes Ciel's fanciful, gothic outfits, that reflect Kuro's dark regal nature. I hoped more of the fun outfits would win... I'm suprised though, I thought the manga outfits would be more popular, like Ciel's Circus Costume, just based of iconicness, but between the artbooks and the celebration illustrations there was strong competition all around.
However, it was nice to see the fandom vote for outfits Ciel shone in, rather than outfits he hated or felt uncomfortable wearing (ie. the emerald witch dress vs the pink dress). Like attitude is essential in fashion! Compared to outfits where Ciel feels... out of touch or just posing, ones where he shows off his spirit really speaks to us.
⚠️skip ahead if opinions scare you1!!⚠️

I HATED THIS OUTFIT. And its so ridiculous, I developed a special hatred for this outfit that has nothing to do with it's design. I was tasked to find an image of almost every outfit in this tournament and this is the ONLY ONE I could not a higher resolution of. It drives me nuts! I can't stand it winning with all those blurry details! It just reminds me of my failure!!
Now I can totally see why it's so popular. It shows how far Yana has come with her art. Sorry for being mean against everyone's second favorite outfit (~_~;) Technically, it did win best outfit based off the polls! (special illustrations non-withstanding) And I get why!
But... it's just not to my taste. The color scheme is dull, there isn't really a theme, it's just a bunch of emblems placed all over. The details are amazing, but again, it's sooo blurry idc. Great outfit, but it doesn't really scream Ciel's best fit to me, y'know. Like where's his personality? I just... 💤

Same note why I didn't care about the figurine illustration. BOH-ring, ayfkhdsfasdf it looks like every outfit he ever wore combined, in a bad way.
And Kuro's Back Baby isn't even an outfit? You barely see anything?? How did it get that far... (guess we're that happy about his comeback lol).
Ok ok that's enough hating, but I'm going to make a separate post of my favorite outfits so yall can roast me there haha~
Conclusion
I was a little worried about doing this tournament, I mean, I've seen some poll tournaments go bad like BAD bad. But the atmosphere was surpisingly nice? I really liked reading everyone's analysis and comments, and how much they loved each outfit. So grateful to do this with everyone, hope to see you next time as well! ( ´∀`)/~~
I have future plans for this blog, which I'll discuss in a separate post, so stay tuned!
#mod posting#the tournament was tough at the start#but it was worth the effort!#thanks everyone! <3#sure am glad i dont have to post on the dot anymore lol
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not screen reader friendly, due to text colors, text sizes, and emoticons.
intro post
(this post will be edited a lot more. important stuff in pink for skimming and general comprehension)
plural system. speak to us privately for more details. member list: (possibly outdated), mask (system masking, and some other stuff. has/is a subsystem?) moona (monika's and julia's and mitsu's mom, maybe princess's too), monika (runs this blog mostly), mischka (gone now. possibly not coming back. might reuse the name for someone else), mitsu (6 identical cats (cloning incident)), moxxie (god), tomoko (heavily canon-divergent tonoko kuroki introject. trisharmful), filth (filth ultrakill introject), spring (permahigh. firework-inspired), angel (underweight, dissociated, and delirious), julia (monika's big sis. a few years older), luna (puppygirl we intended to send to someone else to make her a system. euthanized since that didn't happen and we couldn't take her back), loona (manic girl. white hair), princess (a beautiful princess), corpse (not a member. the body in fake reality)
↑ outdated but dont wanna bother writing a bunch more
dms welcome but i hate the integrated tumblr messenger thing. if u wanna have any long conversation ask for my discord/element/signal contact info. i have sooo much lore to tell everyone. (warning tho i often have difficulty having purely platonic relationships without romantic and sexual and familial feelings, so like if that possibility makes u uncomfy reconsider whether u wanna talk to me privately. might have to end friendships over this and wanna warn about that possibility. gotten better bout separating those feelings recently but deffo still persists)
BOUNDARIES and other related info: moxxie's aro-ace, so wont reciprocate such stuff much. don't sexualise mitsu without explicit and specific consent each time, but anyone else can be sexualised without asking :3. no teasing, especially about shyness or shame
BELIEFS AND OPINIONS
we hate DNIs. they're performative and no more effective than just stating your opinions
we have transminors in this system. follow your own mdni if you wanna idrc
please everyone interact. this is a safe space for everyone. we will never report anyone or do callouts or anything like that. if we dont like u, we'll just ignore u
pro-endo
ai-neutral (search my blog with tags for details on that), pro-transid
pro conflicting labels
proship/profic (tho we rarely partake in shipping)
anti-DSM (the book and it's ideas)
comp-c (slightly explained in some posts. we're ok interacting with any stance)
pro self diagnosis (informed or not; it's part of the learning experience to be mistaken and to experiment. self-dx out of spite is fine too)
we really don't care about "fakers" or such. as long as they're nice to others, i'm glad they have fun with whatever they are. quote from friend:


recommend more things for me to add our opinions about here if you want
feelings are not opinions. my feelings do not reflect my ideology, and they dont have to. i dont need a moral or ideological reason to love or hate
we hate reblog bait
the world needs more sincerity and less cringe culture
cisids (and ids we wanna transition from, whatever those are called): traumatized, autistic, chronic fatigue, migraines, brain damage, personality disorder (more antisocial traits with tomoko, and narcissistic traits with princess), dead (luna), disabled (flying. angel), urinary incontinence, schizospec
trans/trisids: more stimming with autism (monika), brain damage symptoms acquired developmentally instead of neurotraumatically + more intensity (monika), dead (angel), more intense chronic fatigue (mask), no chronic fatigue (everyone except mask and angel), tremor (mask), more frequent fainting (angel), perma psychotic (angel), more intense urinary incontinence (monika), no personality disorder (moona), more intense personality disorder (tomoko), npd (princess), deep voice (princess. dysphoric about it), hypergonadotropic hypogonadism (monika)
both groups of ids are incomplete. some stuff we're unsure about and some we dont wanna say and some we dont care about
more labels: airreur, agefluid (monika. <15), blurage (moona. (adult), mitsu (child)), ageless (moxxie, angel, mask)
↑ those extra labels include especially mogai stuff outside the transid classification, and whatever else seems to fit
chrono birthdays: spring 1.1.2025, bait 1.3.2025, loona 14.1.2024, princess 2.4.2025
food and drinks hall of fame: soups and stews of all sorts, jauhelihakastike/hackfleischsoße, skittles, glögi, cloves
mildly freaky. loose boundaries. up for erp (or non-e rp. not good at it but i can try) just ask contact info
MOSTLY SFW – SOME NSFW
recommend stuff to draw. no promises but if i end up drawing it you get free art from it :3 (tho am extremely beginner and might not draw it. very shaky motivation tbh)
ask for side acc where the stuff that endangers getting yermed goes (venting mostly, also para stuff)
i usually dont follow blogs that post a lot. sorry to those ive unfollowed for posting too much. just cant keep up with many posts
accepting any asks that aren't asking for money or reblog baiting. send spam and whatever else you think is low quality/importance enough to the blogs mentioned in the blogs and tags section
800-900 posts currently. pls read all of them im soo proud of them ill do anything for u if u read all of them
u can use our art however u want (except for feeding into non-personal-use image generators but ik forbidding that wont work anyway). credit optional for reposts and such but it does make us feel good to find out someone liked our art enough to repost it
monika mostly girl but okay with being called a good boy
she/her for most members' third person singular pronouns
it for filth, thon for moxxie, but neither talk here
she/it for monika. along with standard ones, puppy/ouppy/oupy/fuffy and other variations for first and second person nouns and pronouns
she/them for mitsus' third person plurals
any pronouns for mask, for now (he's unstable in identity. might split up into more members in coming weeks/months idk) (yeah update sumn happening with mask)
im perfect btw. i can do no bad. except when i try to but then its not that bad and u should just get over it. also u should never get mad at me and if u do its ur fault for making me feel bad about it /j
im extremely vulnerable to all sorts of stuff and i get attached very easily btw. so, do with that info whatever u will ;3
blogs, tags, links:
@kitchenceiling63 for reblogs and asks (tho asks are fine here too)
@the-triplet-towers for low-quality posts and whatever spam stuff
#proud of this post for some posts i especially like
#low effort for low effort posts and those i don't like as much
https://archiveofourown.org/users/floor_tile_34
ask for our vent (and otherwise unsavory) blog if u want
#i should maybee like write fics to vent that infodumping desire....#this wasn't originally meant to be an intro post. but it morphed into one
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Since I'll probably never make an edit with this song, can I just yap about the kagehinisms of it all...........?
This is in Kageyama's pov btw.
IMPORTANT CONTEXT
Ok, so picture this: it's 2016 and Kageyama is playing for the Adlers and training for the Olympics. Meanwhile Hinata is all the way in Brazil honing his skills in the sandy path he's chosen. Deep down he knows it was the best choice Hinata could've came up with. Kageyama even allows himself to be a little annoyed that he didn't think about it first—but it feels weird to train without him. It's not like they've played together all their lives, in the grand scheme of things 3 years went by really quickly. But in the first week of practice Kageyama would set up balls so quick it made him wonder if he regressed after all. It felt as easy as breathing to listen to the tingling in his chest when a play fell into place just right. Despite the high caliber of his teammates, he was just doing too much.
They never got into the habit of texting. Sometimes he does itch to pick up his phone, but that would mean admitting defeat to a competition he's not even sure they're playing but wouldn't risk losing to.
DISCLAIMER
This analysis relies heavily on my own interpretation of whatever Kageyama was up to while Hinata was in Brazil. Which now that I think about it, it'd be more accurate to call it a headcanon because we don't know ANYTHING about it. Well. Just read okay, you might like it or throw rocks at me and either one is fun and beautiful.
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"Às vezes eu quero chorar, mas o dia nasce e eu esqueço (Sometimes I want to cry, but the day rises and I forget) Meus olhos se escondem onde explodem paixões* (My eyes hide where passions explode)"
Kageyama is lonely, but he doesn't want to admit it (as per usual). Sure, the man is living the dream — his dream — but apparently making friends and learning how to trust them makes you miss them when they're gone. Crazy concept. I'm not saying he cries about it every night, but mr. repression sure is feeling Something and he doesn't want it to burst out of his chest.
*As a side note, "paixão" can mean either passion or, like, an infatuation with someone. Idk, I chose to interpret it as passion because it makes sense with Kageyama's character, but I'm well aware that in the context of the song it means "an intense love that burns out after a while"!
"E tudo que eu posso te dar é solidão com vista pro mar (And all I can give you is solitude with a sea view) Ou outra coisa pra lembrar (Or something else to remember)"
Pretty straightforward. Despite wanting a relationship with Hinata*, all he can give right now is ignoring it for the sake of both of them. Hinata is all the way in Brazil while he's training for the Olympics. They wouldn't be able to balance a relationship in the midst of all of this. It would only hurt them further, so what's the point? ...is what he would say if he wasn't lying to himself. The reason I believe they didn't get together before or during Brazil arc, is that they just can't commit to a relationship. Commitment is a big motif here.
I think both of them believe that commiting would mean putting their careers to the side, or at least jeopardizing it, for the sake of a relationship. And they're fine as it is, being rivals and all. After all it's not like they'll ignore each other, just their feelings, so it's fine right? (No). What matters is that they'll reach their objectives separately and meet in the middle later. Hinata will fulfill his promise and they'll play against each other until they physically can't anymore. Why would they want anything more? Why would they ever ask for more if that's everything they wanted? (Spoiler: because of love. It's always ever-consuming love.)
*He doesn't really understand that that's what he wants, OR he doesn't want to acknowledge it. Whichever you prefer.
"Às vezes eu quero demais e eu nunca sei se eu mereço (Sometimes I want too much and I never know if I deserve it) Os quartos escuros pulsam e pedem por nós (The dim bedrooms pulse and call for us)
E tudo que eu posso te dar é solidão com vista pro mar (And all I can give you is solitude with a sea view) Ou outra coisa pra lembrar (Or something else to remember)"
See? It circled back to wanting too much ❤️ <- desire enjoyer. Mr. repression, remember?
Kageyama is conflicted, because he's never had to consider any of this and he doesn't know he can have both volleyball and Hinata*. They're one of the same, but at the same time they aren't. Hinata is volleyball is the sense that they're interchangeable in Kageyama's mind, but having volleyball is not the same as having Hinata. Chosing volleyball means catering every aspect to his life to hone his skills and body. And chosing Hinata means potentially jeopardizing volleyball because he isn't focusing 100% of his energy into it. Obviously, this is dumb and unfounded... but we're talking about two volleyball idiots here. What the hell do they know about love.
Because of all THIS, all he can give Hinata is not texting him, leaving him to his beach volleyball training and trusting wholeheartedly that when Hinata steps a foot in Japan, he's gonna come back a better player. And this too is love, if you think about it. Only it would be better if they ever communicated about this 🕊️
So it's just radio silence from both sides. And that's all they'll get for now.
*The same way he couldn't have both his grandpa and volleyball. I like to believe he internalized that, as we often do when we experience grief as children.
"Se você quiser, eu (If you want, I) Eu posso tentar, mas (I can give it a try, but) Eu não sei dançar tão devagar (I can't dance slow enough) Pra te acompanhar (To keep up with you) Eu não sei dançar tão devagar (I can't dance slow enough) Pra te acompanhar (To keep up with you) Pra te acompanhar (To keep up with you)"
And this is the basis of why they're not dating yet. Kageyama CAN'T slow down for anyone, not even Hinata. And that's something Hinata understands — he's been chasing Kageyama for a looooong time now, after all. They both won't stop running. It's not like Hinata would be happy if he did. I think he might actually kill Kageyama with his bare hands if he ever stopped to wait for Hinata lol.
(This is kind of a rant, but this is the "why didn't they meet up in Brazil" conversation all over again. If Hinata's not yet at the same level as Kageyama, then what's the point of talking? What's the point in meeting before then? It might sound crazy to the average person, and it is crazy, but I just fear you can't hold kagehina to the same standards lmao. NO sane person would ever go this far to prove somebody wrong, and to have said person actually mean something to you and still hold onto that promise enough to refuse to meet them before fulfilling said promise... is plain CRAZY. You just can't hold them to the same standards as normal human beings, to be honest with you.)
Anyway. They can't compromise on slowing down and/or focusing their energy on a relationship, is what I believe was happening in 2016-2018. That's not to say they are aware of this dynamic, but they might have had an inkling. Sorta of a silent agreement? I don't know man, who even knows with these freaks. Their friends have given up on trying to understand why they can't just bone it out 😭
When do I think they started dating? Well, I'm glad you asked... because I'm gonna answer that in another post since this one is already too convoluted !!
#this is basically just fanfiction but whateverrrr it's canon to ME#feel free to add your thoughts! i like to yap 👍#kagehina#kghn#hq.meta#hq.lyrics
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