#edit actually extra thing here i think it would be kinda cool if rachel was still white so we could subvert that trope of poc love interest

[crunchycrystals]

i follow pjo tags that im usually fine seeing on my dash and i keep seeing people posting about some Discourse thats popped up again since the comic con card photo things came out about leah and like. i guess i curated my dash well because im seeing literally none of that

[spaceorphan18]

Finding Kurt Hummel: Homecoming

Masterpost

6x02: Homecoming

I really need to knock the rest of these out -- hopefully soon I will! But man, there’s a lot more in season 6 than you might realize.  A lot of these episodes are pretty packed.  

At the beginning of the episode, we get a lot more Blaine-meta-ish things, and the one thing I’d like to pull from it is that Blaine’s getting therapy.  Yup, that’s right, both these boys are getting their heads checked by a professional - and that’s a good thing! Look, I don’t think Kurt and Blaine are going to live a 100% perfect and happy life-  no couple can accomplish that, but the fact that they’re both trying to better themselves is a huge thing, and recognizing that is a step forward in becoming adults (I mean, not even adults make the best choices to better their mental health).  So yeah, they might not patch up things perfectly, but I think there’s a lot of subtext (cause Glee’s always been subtext) that shows they’re both in better places by the time season 6 starts. 

The New Monday Night Dinner

So, because Will is a character again (ug) we start having Monday night dinners at his place (ug, ug).  Okay, it’s not really that - but he’s supposedly having all the show choir directors over for a friendly chat? How convenient that they’re all former students.  And why is Sam there? You know what - I’m not gonna think too hard about this. 

The main thing is that Rachel and Kurt are already having issues being co-directors because it’s Rachel and Kurt. 

And then Blaine arrives and Kurt feels super awkward about it.  I mean how do you act when you’ve dumped the person you love the most in the world and now have to be in a semi-casual social situation with them with your former teacher, former roommate whom your ex once made out with and who will some day carry your child, and former dude whom you both had a crush on.  This show is weird guys.  

Anyway, Kurt’s actually happy to see Blaine - even if Blaine is totally ignoring Kurt’s there.  And then Will turns the conversation to ‘everyone be nice to each other’, which lasts about five seconds when they try to give Blaine some advice about a girl being in the Warblers and Blaine is unsure about it.  It’s awkward.  But hanging out with your ex whom you aren’t actually speaking to at this moment is always gonna be awkward.  

Getting the Gang Back Together

Um, what even is this outfit trying to say, Kurt?  Are you the colorful walking dead? 

Anyway - Rachel and Kurt start their tenure as semi-teachers by organizing sheet music.  And let’s just say it -- they both have the most absurd way of doing it.  Just -- no, genre than artist, that’s it you weirdos.  But of course, Kurt would do it by emotion.  

You know what - say what you will about Kurt and Blaine’s communication -- Rachel and Kurt have by far less communication going on.  They’ve worked for two hours at ‘organization’ before they realized they were doing two different things.  Oh Hummelberry.  

Anyway, we get another argument from them - cause that’s what they do best.  And Kurt basically says what should have been said hours ago - that this is pointless without members.  However, if he’s doing his work study here (don’t ask me to define what exactly his work study is - I don’t get it either), shouldn’t he be proactive, too, in getting kids to sign up?  And what’s with the defeatist attitude Kurt? Kid’s still got issues relating to his break-up.  

(It’s also times like these that I do wish we had gotten a final career related story for Kurt, but alas, all the things we never had). 

Anyway, Kurt storms out as he usually does when having a fight and made his point.  

So - after a scene of Rachel following a disembodied voice to the men’s locker room -- we get Kurt meeting her in the auditorium and, sigh, apologizing for hurting her feelings.  Again.  Cause he’s never done that before.  

I think I’m tired of Hummelberry, guys.  

Anyway - weirdly, he apologizes for the things he said in the previous scene about her life.  Which, um, is weird - cause he didn’t actually take any personal shots at her -- which means they edited out some extra dialogue.  Man, I wish they had left that in - but can’t be too mean to Rachel.  

Anyway - Rachel says, yeah, they have to be proactive in getting people to join us - so she’s pulled in some favors.  Idk why Kurt is so -- who did you bring in Rachel?!?  He could have easily figured it out.  

Well everyone is all the former cast members who are still living and aren’t really part of the main cast anymore.  It’s Homecoming - so it seems fitting.  Though, I have to say.  Everyone looks like they’ve aged about ten years -- which isn’t a bad thing, it just means this little coda of a season would have felt better placed much further in the future.  

Anyway - Kurt’s surprised and happy to see all his old friends.  I have to say though - I miss that Blaine isn’t there.  I know he can’t because plot and the fact they’re trying to reset back to season 2 but still. 

Anyway - who cares if any of this makes sense, we have the gang back together again. 

Go they gather everyone in the choir room and explain that they need help getting the kids to join.  And Kurt’s super frigidity.  Huh.  I think there’s some room to explore Kurt as someone who is an anxious kid with minor OCD tendencies.  Cause that feels very apparent here.  

It’s funny that they rattle on about how much they need their friends to band together and save glee club because the school needs it -- when really, both Rachel and Kurt need it.  I mean, that is kind of the point of this season, but...  it’s just interesting to think about.  I mean, it’ll come full circle when Kurt talks about choosing another path to take at the end of the season.  They both hit rock bottom and now they’re looking for something to fill the space that will help them get back on the right track.  And their cause is saving the glee club.  

Hm.  It’s just interesting that this season of Glee is kind of one last stop in Lima before going out in to the world to really be the person you’re supposed to be.  I’m sorry the story wasn’t developed a tad more (except in the case of Rachel) but that’s what it is.  It’s almost fitting, then that I’m wrapping these up with the same kind of mentality.  It’s nice to have that one last thought and move on.  Anyway -- I’m getting meta on myself, lol... 

So - their brilliant plan is to sing in the school - cause that’s always worked in the past, lol.  And they do an 80s classic - because it’s Glee and the last season and Ryan Murphy has to get in all those hits that he didn’t use yet. 

But I think what stands out to me about this performance is that it’s less about the lyrics (which I don’t think make much sense anyway) and more about the visual style.  They’re recreating the music video, yes, but also adding the same elements of style used in the video -- the whole running from the police (Sue) thing, and it’s really pretty cool.  

You can’t get a really good luck at Kurt’s 80s outfit - but here it is, and this goober is just having a lot of fun dancing on the tables and singing in his high register.  It’s nice that they’ve now fully incorporated Chris’s voice into the group numbers -- especially when he’s not going to be singing much on his own.  

Gay Legacy

So, I guess later that day, Kurt goes to try to recruit the gay football player.  Cause, damn, if Ryan Murphy still is clinging on to his closested football player issues.  I really don’t know why Kurt’s wasting his time -- Spencer obviously doesn’t want to be a part of the team, nor have we seen any indication that he actually has some kind of performing arts talents.  But I suppose this scene is supposed to be a commentary on the current state of the LGBT community.  

Actually, that’s exactly what it’s about and it’s kinda fascinating.  The thing about this conversation is to show just how far things have come from 2009.  Society has become more accepting of the LGBT community (obviously, it’s got a long ways to go - but from when Glee started, a lot of progress has been made).  And we’re now here talking about different types of LGBT people.  Kurt can’t and isn’t the catch all for gay anymore - that definition has widen (even if it’s always been that wide and diverse, we can now, as a society, have that conversation).  And now even gay kids can have various inspiration to pull on - it doesn’t have to be musicals, it can be Modern Family.  And that even though Kurt and Spencer share a preference for men, doesn’t make them any more similar than any other two guys. 

So, yeah, it’s interesting that this scene (and the following one that Kurt’s not in) has less to do with the story and recruitment, as it is Glee’s usual way of knocking down the fourth wall and saying - yeah, okay so we’re not relevant like we used to be, but we did have an impact.  

Meanwhile, in actual story time - we get to remember that Kurt was once on the football team -- and learn that Spencer is an asshole, and I’m still not sure why Kurt’s trying so hard to recruit him. 

Recruitment

Kurt next pops up when Brittany is giving him advice on how to win Blaine back -- which involves burning all his clothes (yes, nude Kurt) but getting normal clothes (um, he’s been dressing ‘normally’ for a while now), and then being honest with him (yes do that!) about being a Barbara Bush impersonator (wtf Brittany?).  Kurt’s equally confused as the rest of us and moves on with his life as he should.  

However - I have to wonder - did they know at this point that Brittany was gonna try to get them back together? I have no idea.  None of Brittany’s actions make sense most of the time, so I shouldn’t think too much about it. 

Meanwhile - the main issue is that they’ve all failed to recruit members - mostly because none of them really know what they hell they’re doing.  But then Roderick’s magical voice floats through the vents (sure) and they’re all mystified and run to go find him.  

They find Roderick in the library - and why do they all look terrifying in this scene?  Come join the cult - Roderick, lol.  Anyway - they get a new member.  

And I’ll take a second and talk about the season 6 newbies - who are actually pretty interesting.  They aren’t cut from the same cloth of the originals as the season 4 newbies, their story lines all converge with existing characters, and we’re not forced to sit through any awkward love triangles.  They served a function and it worked, too bad this didn’t happen way back in season 4 - the show might have lasted longer. 

And then we get a long speech about what it is to be in glee.  Cause apparently we needed that reminder.  Kurt doesn’t say anything but nod in the background as other people give speeches.  Ah yes, we’re back in season 1 again aren’t we. 

Roderick auditions for Glee -- cause tradition - and Kurt... doesn’t really do anything.  But he’s there looking pretty so... 

First Meeting

So, ha, okay.  Roderick is their only recruit and he shows up and Kurt has this nice speech about how you can’t go back again, but maybe you can make something new and better out of the ashes of the old thing.  And I think that’s kind of cool -- because it’s not just about glee or his career, but about his relationship with Blaine.  Like I said earlier, even though they’re all home again, the point is to go in a, god help me, new direction -- one that’s better than before, and as we’re coming to the ending of the show, I kind of like that there’s a sentiment that says - yeah you can and are allowed to start over and do things again.  Second chances are a thing. 

However, they’re stopped quickly because Blaine comes in, screaming about how Jane was poached by Rachel and will now be in New Directions instead of the Warblers.  Blaine, who is clearly still angry (and very confused about his emotions) at Kurt blames Kurt for making it all happen -- which is ridiculous, but c’mon Kurt, Blaine’s allowed to have some residual issues.  Kurt even tries to say that it’s fine because the Warblers have a lot of people and New Directions don’t - but Blaine’s pushing back.  Which is actually a good thing, tbh, even if he is a little off the handle here.  Blaine’s no longer going to be a doormat - and that works much better for the balance of he and Kurt in the long run.  

Kurt and Blaine are on their way to being on equal footing again, but here there’s still a lot of pain that hasn’t been healed yet.  Subtext!! 

Homecoming

Alright, so official glee club has started! And they get two more members as the weird cheerleader twins join.  And it’s all happiness and joy as this new/final chapter has officially begun. 

And then we get the final number - Home - where Kurt gets to sing in his lovely lower register.  :D  And the Homecoming celebration officially starts.  It’s a little weird to see the kids doing something so high school normal, lol, but hey it’s a fun time to celebrate.  

So, um, Kurt, Sam, and Artie go spy on Spencer because -- tradition? I mean, that’s one of the themes of episode.  Let’s go with tradition. 

Anyway, being back is actually kinda bittersweet for Kurt because being back home means that there are still a lot of unresolved issues from the past to deal with. 

Blaine and Karofsky are there - and Blaine is intentionally not looking at Kurt, as Kurt looks like he’s been stabbed in the heart watching from afar.  The song plays on - Home is when I’m with you.  Well, Rachel and Mercedes and McKinley is home, but there’s a bit ‘home’ that’s missing in Kurt’s heart.  We’re gonna get there - but we do have a little ways to go. ;) 

[lady-divine-writes]

Klaine fic - “Not Just My Wingman” Chapter 3/4 (Rated NC17)

Kurt and Blaine are roommates, living in the loft together after Blaine graduates from high school and moves to New York. Kurt is determined that he’s over Blaine, and tries to prove it by helping him get a date…or ultimately, get laid. But when Blaine succeeds in finding a guy that’s actually interested in him, will Kurt realize that he wasn’t as over Blaine as he thought?

***Edit - In case you’re wondering, yes, I had posted this a while ago, but I came back and re-read it…and decided I hated it. So I re-wrote it. It’s basically the same, only the language is way better, as are the characters. So, read it again!

Based on the Tumblr prompt - Where Kurt and Blaine go out club hopping as friends, with each other as their wingman. “I’d like them to kinda be like ‘well, we’re pretty dumb for not realizing how back together we are’ or something, and ultimately get back together. Maybe someone points out that they’re basically together again…”

Passing mention of Rachel and Santana, but they don’t live at the loft. Also, the bedrooms in the loft are actual rooms with doors. Mention of Adam (Adam friendly) and Chandler. (Mentions the break up and Blaine’s cheating.)

Read on AO3.

Chapter 1 -  The Chapter Where Kurt Tried to Get Blaine Laid…and Succeeded

Chapter 2 - The Chapter Where Kurt Freaked Out and Blaine Went on a Date…in that Order

Chapter 3 -  The Chapter Where We Find Out What the Hell Happened to Kurt

Kurt took longer than he had planned in the shower. He wasn’t lollygagging. He needed the time alone to recover and think. But they paid for water, so Kurt had to do something else to justify the extra time. There was only so much one could do in the shower (after taking masturbating out of the equation), so he put extra care into cleaning and deep conditioning his hair, loofah-ed every rough patch on the soles of his feet, massaged his charcoal mud mask into his face, and then rinsed till his skin squeaked. He showered until the water ran cold, then did a complete second rinse to tighten his pores and get his heart pumping. If Blaine asked, Kurt could claim he was doing an extra bit of pampering since the bar atmosphere, the drinks he’d had, the sweat from dancing (and from sex), and then sleeping on filthy sheets, had wreaked havoc on his skin.

But the truth was he wasn’t ready to face Blaine.

Kurt spent over an hour underneath the spray until he was finally okay. And he knew he was okay because he told himself so, multiple times.

“I can do this,” he said, turning off the water and reaching for his towel. “I can totally do this,” he repeated, patting his wrinkled skin dry. “This is a new day,” he continued, dotting on his face moisturizer, followed by his body moisturizer. “No reason for what happened last night to destroy anything. We’ll move on from here. Continue like it never happened. Things don’t have to get awkward between me and Blaine just because we slept with one another. We’ve slept with each other dozens of times. This isn’t anything new. In fact, this will make things better. There’s been sexual tension in this loft up the wazoo for months. We’ve gotten it out of our systems, and now we can move forward. That’s it. Just … move forward. Just keep swimming … just keep swimming, just keep swimming …” When his personal pep talk devolved into a Disney show tune, he knew it was time to face the music.

Kurt took a breath, wrapped his robe tight around him, and left the bathroom. Whatever he found outside that door, he’d deal with it like a mature adult.

But when he stepped outside, Blaine wasn’t there. The loft was not only quiet, it seemed empty - no sign of life aside from himself. It was Saturday, so Kurt couldn’t think of anything that Blaine had to do. He could have gone down to the gym, decided to shower there since Kurt was taking forever, and blow off some steam in the process. Or maybe he didn’t leave. Maybe he went back to bed to pass out for a few hours. Just thinking of bed made Kurt yawn. Apparently, after everything that had happened, a one-hour shower wasn’t enough to wake him up sufficiently. Sleep sounded like an excellent idea. He’d go to bed, get a few hours of unconsciousness under his belt, and when he woke up, it would be like starting a brand new day.

Kurt went to his room, took off his robe, and, without putting on his pajamas, climbed under his covers. He melted into his mattress, the clean, cool sheets soothing against his freshly washed skin. He was determined to put last night behind him, go on as if it had never happened, even if he could still feel Blaine’s hands on his body, his mouth on his chest, his fingers opening him up, touching him deep inside. And not only in a physical sense. They had come back to where it all began, been one in a way that Kurt didn’t think they had since that first time they made love in Blaine’s bedroom back in Lima.

The more he tried to push those memories aside and surrender to unconsciousness, the more they wanted to settle beneath his skin. The horrible part was they felt comfortable there. They felt right. They fit there, and in a way, they made him whole. Not because Kurt needed a man to complete him. He’d railed against that kind of thinking his entire life. He might want someone, but that didn’t necessarily mean he needed someone. Blaine, in a way, was a perfect fit in that respect. He didn’t try to glue all of Kurt’s pieces back together, but the mess made more sense when he was around, and that was something Kurt had always felt a perfect partner was. Not someone who wanted to fix you, but someone whose presence made order out of the chaos. Blaine had been such an enormous part of Kurt’s life, and not because he was Kurt’s first real boyfriend, or because Kurt had lost his virginity to him. Blaine filled a gap that had been carved out by other people’s bullying and Kurt’s own occasional self-hate. He was the hand Kurt could hold when times got tough, the shoulder he could lean on when he deserved a good cry, the arms that would envelope him when he needed a little extra strength.

Kurt could make it on his own. He knew he could. He’d always known. But for the time that they had been together and loved one another, Blaine made things easier. Better. Even now, when Kurt had consigned the two of them to a future as simply friends, Blaine was one of the best things he had going in his life. He was the smiling face that greeted Kurt every morning and every evening; he was the person Kurt confided in first above everyone else, even his dad; he was Kurt’s “date” to every movie and every musical he wanted to see, every restaurant he wanted to try. They lived their lives like a fabulous old married couple.

Could they actually end up being one?

Could Kurt be okay with giving Blaine a second chance?

Because if Kurt was really honest with himself, as much as he wanted to move on, he couldn’t see a life without Blaine in it in some capacity.

He was afraid that he was beginning to take Blaine for granted without giving much of anything back.

Did Blaine even want to be there, living in the loft with him? Or was he trapped there by guilt, determined to spend a lifetime making amends for what he did?

If Kurt could make Blaine believe that he truly forgave him, would Blaine consider his debt paid and move out?

After last night, Kurt would say that Blaine wanted to be with him – honestly and undoubtedly wanted to be in a relationship with him.

Could they start over fresh?

Was that what Kurt wanted to see happen in the end? The two of them back together?

So many times he had looked at Blaine and said to himself cheater, unforgivable, non-negotiable, end of story. And yet he had dreams of them ending up together, of the wedding he had planned, their honeymoon, the songs they hadn’t gotten the chance to sing, the vacations they never took … the children they said they’d adopt. He thought that maybe he held on to those things so tightly because of the effort he had put into the planning until one day he had a dream out of nowhere of the two of them eloping in a barn, of all places. And it didn’t matter that they were out in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by over a century’s worth of mildew and the stale smell of horses, with no one but their high school friends and family around them to witness. They were together. They were husbands. It wasn’t about getting to the altar; it was about getting there with Blaine. They had moved on in their lives, but they had moved on together.

Because Kurt loved Blaine.

And it scared the living daylights out of him.

It was also the reason things never worked out between Kurt and Adam. Kurt had wanted them to work. Adam was a great guy – sweet, funny, and supportive. But he wasn’t Blaine. And as much as Kurt wanted to be over Blaine, he didn’t want to hurt anyone else during that process.

He didn’t want to use Adam as a stepping stone, especially if he couldn’t commit to the man with his whole heart. It wouldn’t be right. Adam didn’t deserve that.

Maybe this was where it was all leading after all. Maybe the task wasn’t to find a way to live apart. Maybe it was trying to find a way to meld back together, pick up where they left off before the cheating, before the miscommunications, before the heartbreak.

Kurt thought about it and thought about it, knowing that he’d get no rest until he came up with a solution, because it would nag at him, sit in the forefront of his brain and poke at him until he came to a conclusion. Eventually, after sifting through his options and struggling with the pros and cons, one thing became infinitely clear.

He loved Blaine. He wanted to spend his life with Blaine. And he wanted that life to start right away.

Kurt began to get excited. He wanted to race out of bed and tell Blaine that instant, but he couldn’t. He didn’t want to blurt it out, not after the fit he threw this morning. (Wait? Was it still morning? Kurt had no clue …) Doing it that way seemed like emotional manipulation, no matter how genuine his intentions were. No, he had to ease into it, make sure that he and Blaine were on the same page, make Blaine see that things could be the way he had originally wanted them.

Make him see that Kurt wanted them that way, too.

Yes. That was the solution his brain was searching for. He felt calmer now, more relaxed, and as he tried to outline the steps he would take to win Blaine back – first his head, then his heart – he drifted off to sleep.

***

Kurt woke to the sound of footsteps outside his door, not in strides, but creaking in odd spots, as if someone was sneaking past, trying not to disturb him. Blaine. Blaine was home, or out of his room. This was it, Kurt thought. This was his chance.

Even though Kurt felt like he could sleep for about a week, his eyes popped open. He climbed out of bed and got dressed, not really paying attention to what clothes he put on as long as he was covered enough to be seen in public. He went over the ideas he had come up with before he fell asleep, trying to figure out the best way to start. He’d decided that he shouldn’t make it into too big a deal. One of the biggest problems they had in their relationship was that everything became so drama filled, every issue so life and death. Kurt could make them a casual dinner and they could hash things out at the dinner table, or they could talk it out over a bowl of popcorn and an episode of Modern Family. He decided he’d see what kind of mood Blaine was in when he saw him. He’d know by the expression on his face when Blaine looked at him which way to lean.

But when Kurt finally came out, mildly styled (because he couldn’t stand what he looked like when he passed by the mirror and saw his epic bed hair), and dressed, he caught Blaine coming out of his own bedroom. He had changed, too, and Kurt was right. He’d gone down to the gym and showered. His hair was mildly damp from it, a few loose curls hanging over his brow, begging for Kurt to brush them away and leave a kiss in their place.

But Kurt couldn’t help noticing that Blaine was dressed nice.

Dressed to go out, he realized, and his stomach turned to lead.

“Oh. Kurt,” Blaine said, doing up the buttons to his coat. “I didn’t know you were still here.”

That didn’t sound entirely honest, but okay. Maybe what Blaine was saying was that he didn’t expect to see Kurt before he left.

“Well, I am,” Kurt said, flashing what he hoped was an inviting smile. “I fell asleep in the shower and almost washed myself straight down the drain, so I thought I should, you know, maybe get some sleep.” Kurt laughed a little too hard. Blaine smiled, albeit uncomfortably. “Wh-where are you heading off to?”

“Oh …” Blaine looked surprised that Kurt wanted to know. Or maybe he was surprised that Kurt was talking to him after everything that happened. “I just … I need to go buy something.” Blaine nodded like that explained everything, but Kurt stared at him blankly, waiting for more. “For tonight.”

“Oh, really?” Kurt’s voice held the tiniest hint of excitement. Maybe he hadn’t pushed Blaine completely away. Maybe they were on the same page. Maybe they could talk this out, come to a consensus, start over again but go slow this time. Maybe they could learn each other anew. They could leave the angst and the hurt behind them and begin fresh, become Kurt and Blaine version 2.0. The more Kurt thought about that possibility, the more he wanted it. “What’s going on tonight?”

“I have … well, I kind of have a … you know … a … sort of … date.”

Kurt stared blankly. He didn’t quite understand what Blaine was saying. Was Blaine asking him out on a date? Because they always called going out a date, but that wasn’t how this sounded. When Kurt did understand it, he couldn’t believe it. How could Blaine have a date? They’d just slept together … Kurt had no idea how many hours before. He wasn’t that savvy as to what time it was. But in that moment, Kurt felt his hope shatter, the last few hours of negotiating, soul searching, and planning on his part rapidly circling the drain.

“A … a date?” Kurt did everything in his power to keep the words from cracking. He raised his eyebrows, trying to think of who Blaine would have met from the time Kurt hopped into the shower until now. “W-with that guy from the bar? The one who threw the drink in your face?”

“No,” Blaine said, shy smile fighting to merge into a more serious expression. “No, the … the guy I was dancing with. Do you remember him?”

“Yeah.” Kurt had only caught a glimpse of the man while he was dancing, but he could picture him clearly – his luminous skin; his bright, white teeth; his huge biceps; his six pack showing through his clingy shirt. “A date?” Kurt sniffed (bitchier than necessary he’d admit to himself later). “Well, we both know what that means, don’t we?”

Blaine looked flabbergasted and hurt by Kurt’s insinuation. “It … it doesn’t have to mean that,” he countered. “It’s only a first date. Who knows if we’re even compatible … that way.”

Kurt shrugged. “Doesn’t matter if it means that or not. It’s an option.” He sat on the sofa. He reached for a magazine off the coffee table and turned to a random page. He wasn’t trying to act aloof.

He needed something to hold on to.

He needed something to hold him together.

“I … I don’t have to go,” Blaine said softly. “I could cancel.”

Kurt didn’t know if Blaine meant it, that he’d rather hang around with a bitchy Kurt as opposed to an attractive man whom he might have a connection with, or if he was offering out of guilt. Either way, Kurt couldn’t let him give up his date.

Bitterness and disappointment had him acting like a jerk, but he couldn’t be that level of jerk.

“We agreed this was a good thing,” Kurt continued, though when they had agreed on it, Kurt was failing to remember. “Besides, it would be rude to cancel this late anyway. You should totally go.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure.”

“Really sure?”

“Really, really sure, Blaine.”

“Alright,” Blaine said, finishing up his coat. “Only if you’re sure.”

“Of course, I’m sure.” (Kurt wasn’t sure) “I’m more than sure. Go. Have fun. But be safe.” Kurt smiled without looking up.

“Alright.” Blaine walked backward toward the door, keeping an eye on Kurt in case he changed his mind. “Goodbye, Kurt.”

“Goodbye, Blaine.” Kurt mindlessly flipped through pages, acting like he was searching for something while he listened to the loft door open, pause, and then slide shut.

Then, Blaine was gone.

And everything started to suck all over again.

The second Kurt heard Blaine’s footsteps fade down the stairs, he got up off the couch and went to the kitchen to make himself dinner, figuring he’d just call it an early night. There was chicken kiev left over from a few nights ago, eggplant lasagna, fettuccine alfredo, all dishes he had chosen with Blaine, prepared with Blaine, and eaten with Blaine. There was nothing in the refrigerator that he didn’t either make with Blaine, buy with Blaine, or buy for Blaine.

He bypassed the fridge entirely and headed straight for the cabinet above, and his long forgotten bottle of tequila.

For the first time in his life, Kurt was going to drink his dinner.

He circled back to the couch, plopped on down, and cracked open his bottle. He figured he’d take a few sips, get a buzz going, and when he felt sedate enough to return to unconsciousness, he’d pour himself back into bed. With any luck, he’d sleep straight through Blaine coming home. Whatever happened on his date, Kurt wouldn’t have the wherewithal to deal with it until morning.

So what if Kurt spent most of his Saturday unconscious? He was an overachiever most of the time. He deserved one throwaway day.

A sip of tequila turned into two sips. Two sips turned into four. Four sips turned into … a whole lot of tequila … but amazingly, none of it was making him sleepy. That was because he kept sabotaging himself. He was trying so hard not to think about Blaine on his date that all he did was think about Blaine on his date. He tried to distract himself with television, but channel after channel torpedoed him with sentimental, romantic movies – The Notebook, Moulin Rouge, Sleepless in Seattle, Love Actually. He almost settled for Titanic, thinking he could find the humor in watching Jack Dawson drown to death, but the second “My Heart Will Go On” began playing, he dissolved into tears. He finally gave up on television and went back to his magazine, but he couldn’t sit still. He changed positions on the couch every three minutes, shifting from cushion to cushion, sitting cross-legged, then with his feet on the floor, with his legs crossed right over left, then left over right, reclining with his feet resting on the coffee table, laying completely flat, until he couldn’t stand it anymore and stood up.

All the while he drank his tequila, hoping that eventually it would work its magic. It did, but not the way Kurt wanted it to. Reaching the half bottle mark became the impetus behind one unfortunate, drunken dial - one that he would later look back on and want to punch himself for, since it contradicted everything he felt about his relationship with this person.

Yup, sulking home alone, wide awake and finally drunk, Kurt did something he wouldn’t be proud of.

Kurt even groaned as he dialed the number, his rational brain reminding him one final time before a swig of tequila rendered it useless for the remainder of the night that most decisions made while drunk are bad ones. Bad, bad, super-bad ones.

But tequila brain convinced Kurt to give it a shot anyway, glossing over all of things he had to lose, like a good friend and his self-respect. (Though, days later, he would send a box of Japanese butt-shaped candy to apologize, along with a card that read, “I’m a big butt, and I cannot lie,” which would be accepted with laughter and a hug.)

The phone rang twice, and a cheerful man answered. “Hey! Kurt! Long time no hear from!”

“I know, I know,” Kurt said, trying not to slur his words. “I’m sorry about that. I should have called earlier.”

“Well, you’re calling now. That’s all that counts,” Adam said. “So, what do I owe this honor?”  

“I was just wondering …” Kurt did his best to flirt without sounding as sloshed as he felt “… if maybe you’d like to come over and hang out.” Kurt’s suggestion was met with silence, so he pushed a little harder. “We haven’t hung out in ages. I miss our Downtown Abbey marathons. I think I’m behind by about three seasons.” Kurt attempted to laugh, but with his throat dry and burning, he ended up coughing instead.

“Okay,” Adam said, unsure. “Forgive me if I’m wrong but aren’t you seeing Blaine?”

“No,” Kurt answered quickly, shaking his head for emphasis even if Adam couldn’t see him. “Not together … no … not at all.”

“So, does that mean that you and he …?”

“Yup. Over.” The words caught in Kurt’s throat. “Over and done with for a while now.”

“A-ha.” Adam sounded unconvinced, but slightly amused. “And you sound smashed out of your gourd because …?”

“I’m not!” Kurt turned away from the receiver to cover a hiccup, and Adam chuckled. “Well, maybe I had a sip or two. I just … I wanted to loosen up a little. You know ...”

Adam went quiet, and Kurt, not eager to make a bigger fool of himself then he knew he was making, went quiet, too. He had lobbed this ball – this deflated, pathetic ball – into Adam’s court. He had to wait and see what Adam would do with it.

“Kurt, I know what you’re doing.”

“What? What am I doing?”

“I told you before, I don’t want to be your rebound. And I definitely don’t want to be your revenge fuck. I care about you too much.”

“You won’t be my rebound, or my revenge fuck,” Kurt promised, hating the way his voice sounded needy and desperate. “I swear.”

“Kurt, I will come over there this instant and make love to you on every hard surface in your loft if you can tell me right now that you are not in love with your ex.”

“I …” Kurt whimpered at the visual of Adam – strong and muscular, but also sweet and tender Adam – making love to him on the floor, against the wall, in his bed, on the sofa (where Blaine would catch them whenever he came back). And he wanted it. He wanted slow, romantic, and even dirty sex all over the loft.

But he wanted it with Blaine.

Kurt couldn’t have that, and probably wouldn’t have that at this point. Blaine was moving on. Didn’t that mean that he should move on, too?

He thought he had, but now he wasn’t so sure.

“I’m … I’m not in love with him,” Kurt persisted. “I …” But he couldn’t get rid of the stammer in his voice, and that had nothing to do with the tequila. It had to do with him insisting on something that his brain and body knew wasn’t true.

“You don’t sound all that convincing, love.”

Kurt sighed. He wanted to put forth a better argument. He wanted to convince Adam, but more than that, he wanted to convince himself. But he couldn’t, and he never felt lower in his life.

“Kurt, you’re a great guy. An amazing guy. Any man would be more than lucky to have you, and I hope I get to be that man one day. So, if we get together, I want it to last. But if I come over now, I don’t think we’ll ever have a chance.”

“You’re … right. I’m sorry.”

“It’s all right,” Adam said, sighing like he had hoped for one more objection on Kurt’s part, one more insistence that things were over between him and Blaine. All Adam needed was one more and he’d be on the subway. But Kurt didn’t. “I think it’s safe to say that we’ve all been there. Just … call me when you’re certain this is what you want.”

“Yeah,” Kurt agreed. “Yeah, okay.”

“Goodbye, Kurt.”

“Goodbye, Adam.” Kurt hung up. He put his phone on the coffee table and sat in silence, shame and guilt shoving jealousy over to get a seat at the dysfunctional dinner table.

Kurt wondered how Blaine’s date was going. What were they talking about? What were they doing? What did they have for dinner? (He assumed they’d be eating dinner. It was already – Jesus Christ! Ten o’clock!?) Did they stay in, or did they go out to a movie? Or more drinking and dancing? Did they kiss? And if they did, did Blaine kiss him first? Were they actually having sex? Sex on the first date wasn’t Blaine’s style … except for the time he cheated. But, for argument’s sake, if they were having sex, which Kurt highly doubted, he wondered (selfishly, but still) would Blaine think about him at all?

That was one question that Kurt had had about the night Blaine cheated that he’d never had the courage to ask. Was Blaine thinking about Kurt when he was sleeping with that rando guy from Facebook? Did any thoughts of Kurt pop into Blaine’s head? Did Blaine erase him completely … or had he been there all the time? Was thinking about Kurt, fantasizing about him, the only way Blaine could have sex with someone he didn’t even know? Or was the opposite true?

Thinking about it brought him back to the one day he kept trying to forget but couldn’t. Except this time Kurt had seen the guy. This time he had a frame of reference that made this nightmare more vivid. When he closed his eyes, he saw them together, peeling off each other’s clothes, Blaine’s hands running down his skin, his mouth everywhere, his tongue licking, lapping, caressing …

Kurt knew how it felt, how every single one of Blaine’s kisses felt, every single one of his touches. He felt them on his skin now, remnants from last night and early this morning blazing hot to torment him.

And Kurt couldn’t move.

So Kurt sat on the sofa, staring at the loft door, not because he was necessarily waiting for Blaine to come home, but because time had stopped in Kurt’s head. He got so lost in thinking, visualizing, feeling, and then hating himself, that night became day before Kurt had consciously blinked his eyes.

When he saw Blaine prying the loft door open, trying to do it quietly so he could sneak through, Kurt knew. He just knew. And all of those touches became unbearable, because they didn’t just belong to him. Someone else had them, too.

But Kurt couldn’t blame Blaine.

This was Kurt’s idea.

Kurt had said it was the right thing for both of them. Kurt had said it, and Blaine had agreed. They both agreed, and now Blaine was acting on it. He was doing what Kurt had said he wanted, what Kurt had tried to get him to do the night before.

What Kurt thought he needed in order to get closure.

But it didn’t feel that way anymore.

He didn’t have closure. He had a broken heart.

[spaceorphan18]

Finding Kurt Hummel: Old Dogs, New Tricks

Masterpost

5x19: Old Dogs, New Tricks

Previously on Glee: Everyone else is doing things - while Kurt has his collections of neckerchiefs.   Kinda wondering if Chris wrote that one, lol.   

So....  Yeah, this is the episode that Chris Colfer wrote.  And what do I think of it? Because I know you guys are all here for my very professional opinion on all these things... lol.  It’s... fine.  There are some things that really work -- Santana as a publicist - excellent!! Sam and Mercedes’s relationship issues -- great.  Dogs dragging Lea Michele down the road because of her bratty behavior - totally here for that.  Honestly, I think the Kurt portion of the story may be the weakest aspect of this episode, but this is Chris’s first try at a TV script, and I think he’s done a lot better than a lot of people out there -- including whoever wrote I Kissed a Girl, ug.  

I do think there’s some dialogue that’s a little stiff, and Chris has a tendency to write a little on the cheesy side, but I’m really sad that season 6 wasn’t longer to give him another go at it, cause I think TV writing might have been a good avenue for him.  And I really hope that some day he gets to head his own TV show - because I think it’s something he’d do rather well at.  So - that’s my two cents. 

I will say - this episode is mostly stand alone.  And with the season drawing to a close -- I really am missing those extra two episodes that were chopped off the end of the season.  I really would have liked to play around in this sandbox for a tad bit longer, as I think there were most definitely more stories to tell.  At least I am grateful for what we got. 

Problem Child

So, I’m not going to spend much time (or really at all) trying to figure out how Chris feels about this or that as evident through the script.  I mean -- TV is a collaborative process -- and even if Chris wrote the script, I’m sure a lot of people still had their input, and he didn’t direct it, so...  But I think this still is a good indicator about how he felt about Rachel.  I mean...  yeah, it’s probably how we all feel about Rachel, tbh.  

 So as we open -- Kurt wants to see a movie, but, well, Blaine is too busy doing stuff with June, Santana just doesn’t want to, and Rachel’s freaking out that image is being tarnished because she fucked up in the previous episode.  And, as most things do, it becomes all about Rachel.  Santana, however, steps up to be her publicist -- which is -- incredibly inspired!! Can I just keep the headcanon that Santana sticks to being a publicist, this is a fantastic choice for her.  Thank you, Chris, for this.  

Anyway - Kurt’s more than annoyed -- and even has to tell Rachel to keep her voice down because they’re in side -- because he is, more often than not, Rachel’s care giver.  Because seriously, this girl cannot seem to function on her own.  

So -- here’s my thing.  This script is a little awkward going forward -- a lot of it is Kurt harping on how his ‘friends’ aren’t there for him, though only specifically focusing on Rachel.  And while I think the Rachel was the safest route to go, and one that’s been clearly building for a while, I do think it might have been interesting to see how that played out with others -- such as Mercedes or Santana or even Blaine.  (Though, honestly, I’m glad Chris did the smart thing and not include a lot of Blaine in this script.  I totally get why he did -- because he really didn’t want to be harassed about it -- and that was the wisest choice for him.) 

Oh and then to everyone’s shock - Rachel goes to yell at someone for putting their dog in their purse.  I mean, is this an LA thing? I kinda wonder if this is an LA thing that pisses Chris off and he gets to yell through Rachel.  It kinda feels like it, lol.  Anyway... Kurt’s in the background, but his ‘wtf are you doing’ look is classic. 

Pillsbury

So - this episode has to do with three of Chris’s favorite things: 1. Dogs (animals); 2. Old People; and 3. Fairy tales.  I mean - I don’t think it gets much Chris-ish than that -- unless you wanted to throw in aliens.  I do find it hilarious that he brings all these things to Kurt, because they aren’t really there before -- but it seems to fit in pretty well.  

Anyway - we get June Squibb in the form of Maggie Banks (Do you see -- it’s a combo of Maggie Smith and Mrs Banks from Mary Poppins -- at least that’s what I assume is the inspiration.) I’m not going to talk too much about June Squibb’s performance -- because it’s awkward at best  (I can’t tell if it’s her acting or if it’s the lines).  But it makes a ton of sense that this actress just coming into her own in her 80s is who they got to play the part.  I assume Chris adored working with her.  

Anyway, this old folks home is doing a rendition of Peter Pan (get it - cause they’re old, and they want to stay young forever -- this script is full of stuff like this.  I can’t tell if it’s clever or not.)  And Maggie’s gonna start screaming elder abuse if the poster doesn’t go up in the diner.  But -- that doesn’t stop her from noticing that Kurt’s full of his usual ennui.  

Hilariously, he says he files all his problems away and lets it out during an episode of Long Island Medium.  (This is another Chris-ism.  Yeah, I can’t stop pointing these out.)  While questionable choice of reality TV aside, I do think this is a fascinating beat for Kurt -- he’s internalizing all of his issues.  Maybe it’s cause no matter how far he gets in his life, and partially cause he does have super involved in themselves friends, Kurt’s not one to reach out when he’s got issues.  THIS IS NOT A GOOD THING KURT!!

You wanna know why Kurt and Blaine break up a second time? Cause Kurt pretty much sucks at letting people know he’s struggling with something.  He thinks he can fix everything himself, and you know what? You can’t sweetie -- so talk to people! 

Well -- here he gets to talk to June, and let’s it out that he’s feeling a little left behind lately.  Santana’s starring in vaginal cream commercials, Mercedes’s is becoming the next Beyonce, Blaine has found a sugar mama, and Rachel has already hit her mid-40s where she’s fucking up her Broadway career for a shot at TV.  And Kurt feels like he’s gotten nowhere.  Which -- yeah he hasn’t.  And that’s not a bad thing, not really, since he’s the only one on a sure and steady course, but when everyone around you feels like they’re miles ahead in their lives, it can feel heavy being the only one not /there/.  (I getcha kiddo, I really do.) 

Also - I think it’s hilarious that he says he’s the mother in a Nancy Myers movie.  (That is so Kurt, and so Chris.)  And, god, yeah, let someone else take over handling Rachel.  Geez. 

Kurt then finds out that his therapy session is with /The/ Maggie Banks -- the woman who once starred in the worst Broadway show of all time, a musical about Helen Keller.  (Eesh)  And after being awkwardly asked to come back to the home, she invites him back to watch them rehearse.  Sure - why not, he doesn’t have anything else to do.  

Look at what a happy little goober he is -- he’s gonna hang out with old people! 

Broadway Bitches

Oh Broadway Bitches.  I have a heancanon that Chris came up with this at 2 in the morning and immediately texted Ashley cause he thought it was so funny.  Is it clever? Yes.  Is it something I’d use as a name for an organization dealing with kids? No...  But moving on... 

Can I just reiterate that Santana as a publicist is hilarious.  Also her line -- ‘a designer so fancy I can’t even pronounce his name, there’s hardly any vowels’ is a line Chris probably came up with way back on the season 1 press tour and never got to use. 

Anyway -  to rehabilitate her image, Rachel, Santana, and Mercedes are going to do a show.  And Kurt wants in -- cause Chris remembers continuity and Dani’s off doing roller derby and Elliott’s at a yoga retreat so no more One Tree Hill.  You know - I hate to say this - but I kinda see why he’s not invited here, cause it is about imaging - but they don’t have to be such awful people about telling him no.  

Santana actually says if he’s there he’d probably pull focus which is a) meta and b) probably true.  But Kurt’s rightfully hurt.  They get to continue to roll around in their self-involvement while Kurt gets to be shoved aside.  Again.  

I’m kinda surprised Kurt hasn’t taken up a drinking problem at this point. 

Memories

So Kurt goes to check out the retirement home.  They’re getting ready for their production -- and there are three different headshots of Maggie on that board.  Just saying.  Kurt thinks it’s pretty cool.  And I mean -- I think there is a cool story there to be told about actors who are now considered over their prime when in fact they’re still awesome and kicking butt.  

This episode is going to be a bit heavy handed about it -- cause as much as I love Chris, he’s incredibly heavy handed in his writing -- but it’s a nice sentiment.  And I do think it’s proper that Kurt would be infatuated with stars of old.  

I don’t really have any thing to add -- it’s just a nice shot of Kurt.  He’s amused by this sweet little production. 

Also! I suppose it’s time to bring up Billy Dee Williams and Tim Conway, who have really minor roles in this episode.  I kinda wish they were in it more - their characters are a bit fun.  

And then the woman who plays Peter dies.  Okay, so I kinda find the dark humor funny.  (Also Chris-ism.)  It’s fine guys.  I’m sure she had a delightful life.  

After the commercial break, and after Maggie’s irritation that the dead woman was selfish for dying and ruining the production, we get some more heavy handed commentary about how old people need a reason to keep on living.  Which -- is fine? Chris not to edit your script but you gotta work on more showing and less telling 

And then we get this weird beat of Tim Conway wanting to sit on the chair.  Move kid - it’s his chair! idk. I think it’s funny? 

Kurt claims he can fill in, unless they have rules against that.  They only really have two rules -- a) don’t loose your teeth and b) take the correct meds.  Sure.  The guy claiming he was a pterodactyl however steals the show with his delivery. It’s absolutely hilarious.  

Meanwhile - Kurt goes on to say how much he adored Mary Martin’s Peter Pan back in the day (which explains a lot.  Also Chris-ism.  Five bucks that was one of Chris’s favorite movies as a kid.)  Anyway - he also still sings like a girl so he can totally take it on.  

The retirement home has standards so they have to at least have to hear him sing -- which is great! Cause Kurt always carries around sheet music just in case, lol.  That’s such a Glee-esque line.  What?  

And then Kurt sings a perfectly adequate version of Memory from Cats.  

Okay - I don’t have a lot to say about it, tbh.  It’s nice, Chris sounds just fine on it -- and I’d guess this would be his last solo of the series if Maggie didn’t come in at the end.  But, you know, the song is more about cherishing the memory of these actors -- and people in general who are worth remembering for their great accomplishments - even if they aren’t doing as such any more.  Again - a nice sentiment.  But I don’t really have anything to meta about on Kurt.  

Also I don’t like this song (I’m sorry! don’t send me hate mail).  

By the end - Kurt’s inspired everyone to get up and keep on living.  And has proven to himself that he can handle Andrew Lloyd Weber.  

Btw - the couple of guys dressed up as the lost boys are super cute.  

Homocchio (Ha!) 

The scene before this, btw, is Rachel being dragged by dogs a block.  I mean - it’s funny, yes, but also, c’mon -- are you really going to tell me it’s not at least a little bit of payback? 

Anyway - Kurt bounces in to let Rachel and Santana know that he’s scored the role of Peter in a retirement home’s production of Peter Pan -- to which they are like - eh, okay, nice try Kurt.  And well, Kurt doesn’t take that too well.  I mean, sometimes a role is a role -- and Kurt’s obviously excited about it -- so if you’re a good friend, you suck it up and at least congratulate your friend.  I mean seriously.  But this is Rachel and Santana -  Santana mocks him and Rachel gets incredibly self-involved.  This has been the case since season 1 - so I’m not sure what Kurt was expecting. 

Kurt asks them to go - but they say no.  Santana’s honest about it being dumb, but Rachel claims she has her image to keep up and her stuff is more important.  And Kurt finally lets her have it -- he’s right, she calls him day and night to fix her shit, but when is she ever there for her? Honestly, this rant could have gone on for another five minutes.  It’s nice to see that I’m not the only one irritated by the unbalanced Hummelberry dynamic that’s been going on since season 3.  

Kurt storms out of there cause seriously, he’s had enough. 

Dress Rehearsal 

Hey - it’s time for an awkward dress rehearsal with some pretty entertaining jokes and some more heavy handedness about how you’re only as young as you feel.  I don’t think it’s a bad idea -- but does every scene have to have a speech about it?  

Anyway - Kurt’s sweet in his attempt to inspire them and himself, and suggests updating the music.  

Btw - there’s this line: Ever since you were a question on Jeopardy, you’ve been a know-it-all.  (ha! that made me laugh) 

And then we get some back story on Maggie - how she sends herself flowers because her daughter is estranged.  And Kurt feels sad.   I mean there’s some stuff in there about how Maggie’s daughter is like Kurt’s friends -- not really there when needed, which again, is a nice parallel. I’m just not really fond of Kurt feeling like he’s gotta fix things with Maggie instead of trying to fix things with his friends.  YMMV.

I Hate This Scene - Yup, I’m Going With That as a Header

So - Kurt claims he caused an oil spill in a national park and gets himself in to see Maggie’s daughter.  Oh my god - Kurt, no... At least Clara directly calls security (one guy - cause it’s Kurt) and then when Kurt claims it’s about his mother -- she thinks he’s ‘dating’ her to get her money.  

Oh, god, Chris, why did you write this scene?? 

So here’s my real issue.  The crux of it is about Kurt trying to get Clara to see her mom again cause Maggie misses her so much.  But Clara tells him that basically -- Clara was emotionally abusive to her, which is why Clara doesn’t go see her.  And then Kurt gives a song and dance about why she should just get over that -- and omg NO KURT NO! 

Look - I get the sentiment here -- that we should maybe try to make amends before it’s too late.  But - Clara made the healthy choice of cutting out an abusive family member and looks like she’s just doing fine on her own.  And to have a stranger, who has no understanding of the situation come in an tell you to try to fix it is over stepping like whoa.  Kurt is so in the wrong here - and I can’t even a little bit defend him.  

This story would have worked just fine if Maggie had her regrets and talked to Kurt about living his life and not having them -- it wasn’t needed for Kurt to fix Maggie and give her a happy ending.  Stories don’t always need to have happy endings to make their point.  

Anyway - Clara rightfully throws him out.  But not before Kurt goes on to talk about how his mom died and he wished he’d had one - so she should be grateful that she does. And be the better person and take care of Maggie now that she’s old - even if she sucked as a parent.  Again - no - this is also emotional manipulation.  Kurt, no! Stop! This scene is just... no!! 

I am glad that Clara just doesn’t say anything and gets him out of there.  

My Old Ladies Are Better Than Yours

To make up for the atrocity that was that previous scene - we get a Klaine scene that is really quite beautiful in its simplicity.  Chris didn’t have to put this in here -- but he did, and I’m grateful, because it’s sweet and warm and old married-like, and while Blaine really isn’t in this episode, I’m glad that they were allowed to have this small moment and leave the drama for someone else to write. 

So -- Blaine jokes that he’s missing stuff with June to be there for Kurt -- but ultimately, of course he’s there for Kurt.  Because he’ll always be there for Kurt.  Like I said earlier -- this story is more about Kurt’s issues with Rachel (and himself for feeling like he’s going nowhere) more than anything having to do with Blaine.  

I do think it’s interesting that Blaine comments on how happy Kurt’s been -- and how that hasn’t been the case lately.  I like that Blaine’s checking in, even if Kurt isn’t fully open.  Kurt admits that he feels like this role is finally a step forward in his life, and being with the retirement group is giving him something that he’s been missing -- but I do think there’s an underlying sadness that Kurt’s not addressing.  

Kurt’s not opening up to Blaine about his insecurities and his feelings -- and that is going to cause a problem.  While they are mostly fine -- I do think Kurt’s continued withdrawal from admitting how he feels is going to blow up in his face later.  Communication is key, guys, do it! 

How adorable is Kurt in this outfit? :) 

The other thing I really love about this scene is the casual intimacy of familiarity.  They are an old married couple in this scene -- from Blaine helping Kurt with his costume, to Kurt telling Blaine to sit a row back cause Gladys can’t keep solids down.  It’s not in-your-face affection - it’s light touches and smiles and I really love that during this arc they finally allowed Klaine to have that. 

Peter Pan

Before the show - Kurt asks Maggie if she’d like to be his family, since their own families are too busy for them.  It’s a sweet moment - but I’m also like -- Kurt, seriously -- talk to your friends!! But yeah, sometimes you do need to carve out your family where you can find it.  Non-tradition is an okay thing. 

For reasons I don’t fully understand, Kurt breaks down and calls Rachel -- apologizing for yelling at her (seriously?) and tells her he hopes her own show goes alright.  Kurt’s a good egg.  Rachel’s lucky to have him as a friend.  

She rushes him off the phone -- but only because she’s sitting with the rest of the gang waiting for his show to start.  And he’s stupidly excited.  See -- they love you Kurt -- they do!!  (Plus, it’s my headcanon that Blaine had something to do with rounding them all up...) 

And... then we get the whole reason Chris wrote the episode -- so he could fly around as Peter Pan while singing Madonna’s Lucky Star, with an entourage of old people in the background.  Lol.  The whole thing is cute and ridiculous and cute.  And of course, it works for the show, and gives a chance to Chris Kurt to completely geek out.  I mean, yes, I know, Kurt in that costume, but the old people are also ridiculously adorable in this scene. 

I’m not sure about the whole old people turning into little kids thing (man with the heavy handedness, the metaphor works fine without it) but it’s nearly blink and you miss it, so I won’t really even comment. 

Clara ends up showing up and reconciling with Maggie.  And I have a cold, dead heart because the scene just doesn’t work for me.  Like I said earlier -- not everything has to have a happy ending. 

But at the end of the day, this show is still Glee. 

But the important thing is that Kurt’s friends all showed up.  Rachel gushes that some day they’ll be old folks in a home (eesh) and Sam goes straight for the crotch to comment on the harness squeezing, um, things, lol.  But ultimately - Rachel’s set it up so that the old folks can come do the performance again -- so we can combine old people with puppies and could this episode be any cuter?  The only thing missing is aliens. 

Kurt: What do you say, Maggie, you think you got a second act in you? Maggie: I never used to believe in second acts.  But you’ve proven me wrong.

Omg.  Chris - this should be your submission for a place on the staff of a Disney show. 

Take Me Home

See -- look how adorable? 

After a rousing speech from Rachel about being shallow is dumb and you should care about things that are bigger than you are -- they break out into a chorus of Take Me Home.  And this is where I appreciate Lea Michele - because she’s able to sell the incredibly cheesy dialogue better than June Squibb.  I mean, look, I like cheesy - I do -- but it’s dialed up to 11 in this episode.  Chris, I love you to death, but you don’t have to try so hard to get your point across <3 

I’m sorry if I came off as extra harsh about the episode -- I don’t think it’s bad, and it’s certainly better than about half the other episodes of the show.  I think it’s just me nitpicking - cause I do adore Chris and I really want him to push himself to be better.  This is a great first try, and I really do hope he gets more tries in the future -- cause I do think he has potential.  I just want someone there to soften the rougher edges of his writing.  That’s all. 

And the episode ends with a mutual love fest for everyone.  Cause it’s not a true Glee ending without everyone barfing glitter and rainbows.  Lol, I’m only half being facetious - it’s cute, and a little wrong about Rachel, but fits the episode perfectly.

Oh my goodness - one more season 5 episode left...