#eating disorder ment //

[genderfluid-and-confuzled]

I think for Yom Kippur I'm going to try and eat. Which feels impossible, and also shitty bc like. i have ALWAYS fasted on Yom Kippur. But also, as a kid, I was in part doing it as a precursor to all this bs. SO I think it would be more of a repentance, more of a hard act, to do this act of kindness for myself.

[mogai-headcanons]

Ellen/Eli from To the Bone is a sapphic coffeegender faungender balletgender angelcoric lattegender person who uses she/her, it/its, and ☕️/☕️s pronouns!

dni link

[glambots]

come to think of it, Chica eating out of the trash kind of has a sadder implication in the human au. While there’s nothing wrong with dumpster diving it’s still generally not a good sign

Also all the staff bots in the daycare are a little darker-

Yeah, there are a few details in canon that are really hard to translate over into specific AUs because, as wild as it would be, I do not imagine Human!Sun/Moon's room is full of Actual-Factual corpses.

Take Eclipse, for example! Would he still be a virus? If they're all characterized to be separate people, would he be their sibling or something similar? Where does he live? And what's his fucking deal?

[fagboysupreme]

2D for the No Band AU. Other wacky facts:

Notable coworkers are Paula, Ace, Tony Chopper and his dad

Addicted to opioids/heroin so he started doing coke to offset the sleepiness and now he’s addicted to that also

bisexual but refuses to admit it to himself

really hates his jobs and isn’t very good at them. half cause he has bran damage and there’s no accessibility measures taken and half because he genuinely just likes giving girls free ride tickets if they take their shirts off

he has a teeny tiny band called Man Research with Ace and Tony but it’s basically just an excuse to bang out tunes in Ace’s garage

he actually has one eight-ball fracture from getting hit with a bumper car so he just hides it behind his fringe

literally just moved out of his parents’ house because he genuinely felt like a freeloader even though he was paying rent

got a DUI so he’s riding a bicycle everywhere rn

has some kind of EDNOS

chronic self-harm

Ace is literally the only stable human being in his life besides his mom and dad and he’s more or less resigned to dying before he turns 30

[kingstooth]

every time i see ppl equating eating w being fat i want you to understand my fat ass has had an eating disorder my entire life that means i've gone long stretches of just not eating and i am still fat. i struggle to consume enough of any nutrient on a day to day basis and only in the past year has my calorie intake been anywhere close to the daily recommendations and i am still fat.

how much someone eats actually has nothing to do w how fat they are and i'm no longer asking people to expand their knowledge i'm just telling you to do it lmao

[tigersorange]

hey guys i hate to have to say this but please do not reply to my posts or reblog my posts talking about ed stuff. i have those tags filtered and if u reply to me saying stuff even with a tw i still have to see that bc it doesnt get filtered.

[meowreblog]

had a dream last night that Orange Oasis was a lot creepier and it was based on Sunny's eating disorder. kind of devastating to think about

[trans-leek-cookie]

Doing my regular search of hypothyroidism of Tumblr bc I like seeing ppl talk about it. First post is pro ED and says their hyperthyroidism becoming hypothyroidism would be horrific bc it would make them fat. Anyway how's everyone else

[depressed-celestial-body]

Things I think my mom should stop doing:

1) Telling people I have a double major when I do not

2) Imposing her anorexia on me (I do need three decent meals a day to function normally sorry)

[blualt]

i hate the taste and texture of meat and get Really Fucking Stressed if i have to eat it (woo arfid yayy /sar) so i just decided to be a vegetarian a few years ago since the only meat i ate was hotdogs and chicken nuggets and even then i didnt like them that much

i do, however, like the taste of blood. like whenever i get hurt (which thankfully doesnt happen often) i just stick whatever is bleeding in my mouth bcus 1. apparently saliva has motherfucking painkillers in it?? idk i have heard it a handful of times in different places, and 2. mmmm blood

so imagine how fucking funny it would be if i was a vampire

“oh im a vegetarian, anyways let me drink your fucking blood”

[tangledinink]

whining. pouting. sulking, even. he better not use my NICE body wash...

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[genderfluid-and-confuzled]

just thought id drop this bc i like it and want to save it and my blog is like a bulletin board for me

[tchaikovsgay]

gonna bitch about this more under the cut

the lowest i ever weighed in high school was 145, and this was in my peak eating disorder days. i was sickly and barely functioning, eating just a bag or two of sun chips a day. and my average in hs was around ~180. photo on the left was ~145, where i was categorized as overweight. photo on the right was when i hit the "obese" bmi range.

so many medical decisions were made for me based on that bmi alone. so many diets were recommended. and its so deeply fucked up. it got worse when i got up to 235 in college (thanks antidepressants) but now that I'm down to 190ish and feeling amazing, i just want to go hug my high school self so badly. she was an athlete, she needed that body weight and she needed to eat food to fuel her activities. no one should have been scrutinizing her body the way they did. and even if she was fat, theres nothing inherently wrong with that and people should have shut the fuck up. teenage girls dont deserve to feel like this.

but now my problem is, i have no idea what i even look like. i see pictures of myself and am so thrown by how small i look because in my head i feel SO much bigger. just because of the number on the scale and that stupid bmi range. as my body has changed again, it feels so fucking alien. I'm worried about the rammies of my bmi with finding a top surgeon. I'm worried the number on the scale will make insurance go "eh, we'll cover top surgery but only after you lose weight". its even more scary because I'm trying to lift weights to help my dysphoria, and muscle weighs a lot, so even as inches disappear, I'm always going to be a heavier person. my body was designed to be dense and frankly i love it for that. i love being strong and sturdy. i just wish the medical world was less hostile

did any other #girlathlete have the experience of being rewarded for putting on muscle while simultaneously criticized for having a high/overweight/obese bmi? yeah. this experience haunts me and has given me irreparable body dysmorphia

[glambots]

TW for disordered eating behaviors. If you’re uncomfortable with that feel free to just delete this.

Consider; In the human au they probably all have some nasty food habits since the environment seems like it would foster them, such as food hoarding, defensive eating, binge eating, or just not eating at all unless forced to.

While Chica seems obvious, I wouldn’t put it past the plex to restrict all of them to eating at certain times or charge them for it during the times they are allowed to eat. I also wouldn’t be surprised if they enforced a ‘no outside food’ rule for those of them living in the plex to the point of taking it from them.

You’d probably see a lot of eating things just because it’s there and they don’t want it to be taken from them or refusing to eat because when they do it makes them feel hungry again.

With sun and moon in particular you’d probably see them sneaking food from whatever the kids are allowed to have on occasion, or avoidance of eating. (If you go long enough being hungry, you’ll eventually get used to it, at least until you eat something and feel the need for more, which can quickly turn into binging. Neither are good for you) you’d probably see them only eating in private as well because kids can be grabby. They also give me food paranoia vibes but that’s probably because I have it.

The glams would probably fall into the category of food frequently being taken from them or restricted, especially Chica based on her existing behavior. You’d probably expect a lot of binging just for food being there(Chica), eating just so no one can take it from them(Monty or Roxy), and eating exclusively in private(Freddy, for reasons)

I feel like the plex would probably also chastise them for that sort of thing but still encourage it via their policy.

TFW you have all of these issues:

[wickjump]

horror and killer but they’re underweight due to horror starving for 7 years and coming out of that with an eating disorder, and killer being incapable of figuring out when his body needs to eat and just Not doing that when he needs to

and then there’s dust who eats more than he did as sans because as long as it makes him forget he wants to kill himself he will eat whatever the hell he’s given as a distraction. everything is a distraction to him. and i think that’s fun

it’s okay killer and horror gain weight eventually once horror figures out how to not throw it all up and killer is pressured into a normal eating cycle don’t worry

[thedisablednaturalist]

My mom doesnt allow me to have food in my room but sometimes my dad can override her and lets me eat in there when i have dnd night. Whenever i want to eat outside of that i have to either eat outside the house, sneak food into my room, or literally sit next to her while I eat. And if its food i made myself she will always comment on it being unhealthy or too much food even if I hadn't eaten the entire day (bc I've either been too tired to get to the kitchen or bc ive been afraid to go in there). The dining area and the kitchen are connected openly so its not like i have anywhere to hide. And when im working i have to get up early so sometimes its either get up/stay up late to eat and get less sleep or forgo eating to get enough sleep. And i bet she thinks its good for me to miss meals bc ill "lose weight". And then she wonders why i have issues with binge eating :))))

I spent all my spoons today cleaning. I got all my laundry baskets out of common areas, put all my clothes away folded and organized, and put some clothes in a box for donations. I had vacuumed most of the house save for the dining area and kitchen where my parents were even though it was hurting my hands. I've also been feeling faint bc I haven't eaten in a while and beginning 3 hours before dinner my mom gives me shit about eating and I didn't have any reserves left hidden in my room.

So I go with the vacuum to finish cleaning and open the gate (we have gates to each room to herd the dogs) and immediately my mom is freaking out bc I'm "letting the dogs out". I wasn't. Her screaming at me however startled me and I accidentally knocked over a pill bottle onto the ground which then further sent her into a fit of anger confusing me. This was while I was trying to close the gate as her yelling made me think that was the priority. Literally her screaming caused me to not see the pill bottle being picked up by one of the dogs. I thought her further yelling was bc I had almost knocked over the treat bin trying to figure out what the hell i was doing wrong. And she wasn't yelling anything helpful btw, just yelling at me to STOP and that im KNOCKING EVERYTHING OVER.

My dad eventually stepped in and grabbed the pill bottle and told me directly what happened and that I needed to watch where the hose was. This was much more useful to me than my mom screaming and insulting me.

When I tried telling this to my mom she told me to shut up and I said I'm done and left the room. i heard her yell that shes not giving me dinner and shes tired of being threatened?? I never threatened her??? I just said im not going to do it if shes going to yell at me. Thats not a threat thats me using boundaries.

So now im hiding in my room feeling faint and confused and overwhelmed. I hate that she's using food to control me. Whenever I try to go get food or cook something she gets mad and tells me I don't eat her dinner bc I want to only eat takeout and waste my money. She thinks that everytime i don't eat dinner i sneak out and get takeout somehow?? No i literally just starve in my room and eat after she's gone to bed if I haven't passed out by then (she stays up late).

And my dad says i cant be yelling at her bc it sets her off but most of the time im not I do have a loud voice and sometimes i raise it when shes yelling because im trying to defend myself and im frustrated and i dont handle being yelled at well. She is always the one to raise her voice first. But apparently im just supposed to be quiet and accept her yelling and insults and horrible words. I try to walk away but that just pisses her off and shes come in my room and screamed at me before which causes me to panic and scream at her to get out. Like i know im traumatized and i cant just suppress that panicked reaction when faced with the source of it.

I hate the way she treats me and makes me feel like im just a spoiled adult teenager bullying their poor mother and i have all this guilt and self loathing. But then when I tell my friends what happened they get super disgusted and upset and i see how mothers are depicted in media and i see my friends mothers who arent also abusive and i see the differences clearly.