#early pregnancy scan 6 weeks

[blueorpinkuk]

Anxious to be aware on the off chance that you're having a kid or a young lady? And looking for an Early Gender DNA Test UK, then read on this article to know the steps.

[eds6ngel]

✮⋆｡°✩⋆˙ a christmas miracle

a 'when i kissed the teacher' spinoff.

summary: you and steve were in a weird situation. you weren't actively trying to get pregnant, but you weren't exactly being safe either. so, how will steve react when he opens his final christmas present?

warnings: dad!steve. mom!reader. fem!reader. afab!reader. 90s!au. mentions and allusions to sex. mentions of pregnancy. pet names. kissing. tons of crying. alena being too young to understand pregnancy (kinda cute tho). alena being a cutie pie as always. some worries over steve's reaction. but mostly fluff and comfort!! [1.9k].

author's note: hi everyone!! i am back!! my first semester of uni is finally over, so i can get back to fic writing a little more! i couldn't neglect my happy family like this, so i've tackled a pregnancy fic! i've never been pregnant, but i do wish to be in my life, so all of my research has been for my own benefit and utilised in this fic. if i'm inaccurate in any parts, please let me know for the benefit of the readers and myself!! ♡

It was hard not announcing the news to Steve. Having to attend your first scan without him was heartbreaking, but the look upon the nurse’s face after you told her you were going to wrap up the ultrasound photo, along with a card saying “Merry Christmas Daddy” and a pair of small, cream, woolen socks, just confirmed your decision was the right one.

You and Steve were in a sort of weird situation. You had stopped using protection, but weren’t in a position were you were actively trying to get pregnant. You agreed that any time from now was an okay time for the two of you to have a child, but also weren’t bothered if the pregnancy tests came back negative.

But, a little Christmas miracle decided to form inside of you, the test showing two lines on December 11th, 1999.

Steve and Alena had gone grocery shopping for an hour, the perfect opportunity for you to wrap Steve’s gift.

Rolling out the wrapping paper, you placed a grey, fluffy blanket in the centre, before laying on top the Christmas card which read:

Hi Daddy.

I’m six weeks old today!

I can’t wait to meet you soon! I’m planning to enter the world on August 20th, 2000.

My mom is keeping me very safe right now as I grow, but I’ll still be listening out for you from inside my home.

See you in nine months.

Love, your future child <3

And as you were about to place the ultrasound photo next to the cream baby socks you previous put underneath the card, your eyes started welling with tears once more.

Was it the hormones? Maybe. But, something in you felt this was all natural. You were growing a human life inside of you, one that has half of your DNA and the other half the love of your life’s. That was something to bask in the intense emotion of.

With everything laid out neatly, you reached over for the sellotape, folding over the edges and carefully sticking them in place.

Wrapping the gift in a pretty cream bow, matching the socks inside, and adding a label reading “To my darling Stevie,” you added it to the pile of increasing gifts in the corner of yours and Steve’s bedroom.

Now, just a week to go until he gets his surprise.

You cradle your stomach, despite the size not increasing at all yet, and whisper to your unborn child “A week and he’ll know, my love. Your beautiful existence will be known.”

“Mom! Dad! Wake up! Wake up!”

You are awoken by the sound of your bouncing ten-year-old, aggressively rocking your fiancé as he groans loudly, his eyes adjusting to the light peaking through the window.

“Mornin’ pumpkin,” he murmurs, you opening up one eye as Alena’s full set of brand-new adult teeth smile right at you.

“And what are you doing up so early, missy?” you ask, the clock on the bedside table next to Steve shining a bright 6:00 in the morning, illuminating the room in a red glow.

“Mom” she drags out, rolling her eyes playfully, “You know what day it is!”

You tap your chin lightly, playing along with the joke, “Hmm… I feel as if I may need a reminder.”

“It’s Christmas Mom! And I may or may not have seen all the presents you left underneath the tree…” her vocal pitch increases, looking away in a guilty look as Steve reaches up and pulls her down into his body, the girl screaming as he ruffles her hair.

“Did someone be naughty and peak underneath the tree?” he grits through his teeth, Alena shouting in a reply, “I didn’t mean to, I promise! I saw it on the way to your room!”

You begin to tickle her sides as Steve holds her in place against his chest, making the girl scream in delight loudly, “Is someone now on Santa’s naughty list?”

“Mom…” she pouts her lips, a grumpy expression adorning her face as you sigh sadly, “I know sweet cheeks, you don’t believe in him anymore.”

“I’m sorry…”

You hold out your arms as you wrap her in a warm hug, “Don’t be sorry, baby. I knew you would realise eventually. You’re getting too old!”

She gasps and looks into your eyes, crossing her arms over her chest, “I am not old! You and Dad are old.”

You start giggling in shock as Steve just opens his mouth wide, “You better watch yourself, pumpkin.”

“Yeah,” you hold up a finger in warning, before pointing it over to Steve, “Dad doesn’t like being reminded he’s in his mid-thirties.”

And now it is Steve’s turn to attack you, but instead with aggressive kisses, littering them up your neck and across your face lightly, Alena now old enough to understand the playful love between the two of you. “You’re almost thirty as well, you know.”

“Two more years to go, babe. I’m still in my prime development decade,” you smirk at him.

And it wasn’t just you who was developing.

A loud gasp can be heard along with the shredding of paper as Alena holds up her latest gift, “You actually got me it?”

For such a small gadget, the Barbie Digital Camera cost you $70, the most expensive gift yet, but maybe not the one which will cause the biggest reaction.

“Of course I did! It’s the one thing you kept pointing at in the magazine!”

She giggles with a bright smile, “Thank you! Thank you!”

She launches herself at you, the motherly instinct in you clutching onto your stomach to protect your unborn child, hoping Steve didn’t notice the movement. The surprise would be known in the next half an hour.

“And after you’ve taken your photos, we can connect it to Dad’s computer and see it come to life! How cool is that?”

“Can I take it to school?” she asks, clutching the box in her hands.

“I assume you can! But, just ask Mrs. Critchley before you take it in, okay?”

“Okay!” she smiles, plopping herself back down on the carpet to open the rest of her gifts.

Your hands began to sweat. Alena was all done opening her presents, patiently waiting for you and Steve to unwrap yours.

Steve let you attend to your gifts first. Everything from a brand-new necklace designed with a rose quartz, matching your engagement ring, to the latest Nokia phone, you were thankful for everything he had bought you, praising him with many gentle kisses and warm hugs.

Now, it was Steve’s turn. You specifically told him to leave one present until last, leading him to give you an eyebrow raise and a shrug before simply agreeing, used to your weirdness by now. You got him everything from a new cologne to a new pair of Nike shoes, the soles of his old pair wearing thin from how much he was working over the Christmas holidays.

But, after one final kiss, it was finally time.

“Can I open this now?” Steve jokes, the nerves deeply settling in your stomach. You don’t even know why you were worried, you had stopped using protection in mutual agreement, knowing kids could be a possibility from that result. There was just a voice in your head trying to convince you an awful reaction would occur.

“Uh, yeah… Yeah, you can.”

“Hey,” he puts an arm on your shoulder, “Why are you so nervous?”

You lightly chuckle, “You’ll find out once you open the gift.”

Even after all of these years, Steve still wasn’t the smartest. Verbal cues were not his strong suit, but my God could he read body language like a champ.

He gives you a confused look before unwrapping the cream-coloured bow, delicately tearing apart the paper as his eyes immediately notice the ultrasound scan.

He may be oblivious, but he isn’t that oblivious. He has one very similar in his bedside table drawer of his sweet ten-year-old daughter sat next to him.

The tears form at his eyes before he can even recognise them. Small sniffles enter the atmosphere as his hazel eyes make contact with you, “Are you serious?”

And the tears follow suit for you, nodding frantically as he leans across the floor to collect you in his arms, crying into your shoulder.

“How far along?” he mumbles into your shoulder, tears dripping onto the red fabric of your dress.

“Read the card and you’ll find out.”

Steve was too drawn into the ultrasound scan to even notice the card you had gotten him. Releasing from the hug, he keeps a gentle hand on the small of your back, picking up the card and carefully opening it, reading the words you had written, the tears increasing as he noticed it was from the perspective of his baby.

“Wha— How? When did you get this done?” he stutters out, still in complete shock of the entire moment.

“Pregnancy test has been in the bathroom trash can for two weeks. I was scared you were going to notice it for a while, but then I remembered it’s you, and you don’t notice anything,” you giggle, Steve not even bothered by the joking insult, too caught up in his own emotions, “And two Thursday’s ago, I didn’t go to work. Went to the hospital and got the scan, and just hung around Starcourt until the time I would normally come home.”

“Well, you fooled me,” he chuckles, leaning in for a kiss which you gladly accept, cupping his cheeks as you smile into it.

“I love you so much, beautiful girl. And I love the baby who is growing inside of you. You’re so strong. Your body is so strong. I just— I can’t wait. I can’t wait to meet them.”

His hand had migrated down to your stomach, gently cradling the unborn child inside of you.

Alena had finally looked up from her Etch-a-Sketch, noticing the tears falling down both yours and Steve’s cheeks, your hands holding tightly onto each side of his head as your foreheads were leant against each other, kneeling on the soft carpet of the living room.

“Mom? Dad? Why are you crying?”

Steve turns around to face his daughter, you looking softly into her eyes, “Because Mom is having a baby, sweetie.”

Steve passes her the ultrasound scan, her face scrunching up in confusion as she points at it, “Why is it just a black blob?”

Steve begins laughing as his head falls onto your shoulder, sweetly rubbing up and down the sides of your waist.

“Because when a baby is first made, it starts out as a black blob and then grows into the full size baby we all know and love,” you explain gently to her.

“Hmm…” she takes in, before asking her next question, “But how did it get there?”

Your eyes widen as Steve’s hands stop on your waist, refusing to lift his head and look at his daughter.

You smile through the awkwardness, remembering that her sex education lessons would start in a matter of months, “You’ll find out soon, baby.”

thank you ever so much for reading!! do you guys want any more pregnancy related fics? i really want to do some research into post-partum for myself, so do you want me to skip straight to that, or tackle other things like morning sickness, gender reveal, baby shower, stuff like that? feel free to let me know!! ♡

taglist: @livsters @bakugouswh0r3 @nix-rose @ihatepeanutss @suitelif3 @clincallyonline17 @crowssixof @starkeylover @eris-rose-86 @frostandflamesfanfic @tlclick73 @steveshairspray @superlegend216

[drferox]

My MS Diagnosis

So I’m approaching the 2 year mark since my Multiple Sclerosis diagnosis and I thought I’d better document how I got here, because being the patient is a weird experience, especially for a condition that had kind of vague symptoms that needed a fair amount of work up.

My symptoms actually started in early 2020, when I was in the third trimester of pregnancy. The main symptom was mistaken for carpal tunnel syndrome - numbness in my fingers that would progress to increasingly violent pins & needles sensations, that would progress to burning if I tried to push through it. Only this sensation would extend all the way up to my shoulders at times. I stopped performing surgery, because not only was I unsatisfied with my lack of sensation to know what I was doing with my tissue handling, but the pain would get worse quickly in constrictive surgical gloves in the presence of patient warming. So I stopped performing surgery in late pregnancy and was told it would get better a few months after giving birth.

It did not.

So six months after giving birth, finding myself able to use my hands for short periods but still unable to perform surgery to my standard, I went back to complain to the doctor. I also couldn’t play video games properly, my arms would often be numb when I woke up, all the way up to my shoulder, and they were super temperature sensitive. Even hot water from washing dishes would set them off.

They sent me down a carpal tunnel work up - ultrasounds and talking to a neurologist. The short version is they did tell me I had mild carpal tunnel… on one side only.

Which did not make any damn sense considering I had symptoms on both sides all the way up to my shoulder.

The worst neurologist in the world could not explain to me why a mild problem on one wrist was affecting sensation all the way up to the opposite shoulder, and just said ‘it happens sometimes’. Now, I like to think I have a solid understanding of the basics of how a body works, and was really unsatisfied with this answer. They recommended I talk to a surgeon, since I’d already been doing a bunch of physiotherapy, but I decided not to. Surgery could have put my hand in a cast for up to 6 weeks, I had a 6 month old baby to care for at home and a partner who was useless at best, and abusive at worst. I could not afford the time in a cast.

So I went to try something else, visiting an osteopath to see what they could do about my ‘mild’ carpal tunnel, and while I’m there, these headaches I’ve been getting.

She spent a good long while stretching out different muscle groups, and found that certain neck muscle stretches changed the sensations I was getting in my fingertips. So whatever was causing the hand problem was coming from somewhere in the neck, and she recommended I get a CT scan.

Went back to my doctor to get a referral for a CT scan, and explained what was going on. He thought about it for a minute, didn’t voice his concerns, and upgraded it to a neck MRI.

That MRI found a demyelinating lesion in my neck. So went back for a full Central Nervous System scan and found a couple more borderline ones.

That sent me back to a (different) neurologist, had a proper neurological exam that found a few random patches of altered skin sensation in addition to the arm weirdness I had going on. So I was probably a MS case, but not particularly severe as MS goes.

To confirm it I needed a lumbar puncture to look for oligoclonal bands in by CSF. The lumbar puncture was a moderately unpleasant experience which then mandated that I remain lying down for 24 hours so that my spinal fluid didn’t spring a leak. With a baby and a distinctly unhelpful partner, I barely made it to that 24 hours.

And then… I sprung a CSF leak. Which is a jolly weird experience I can tell you.

When your CSF leaks from a lumbar puncture you will feel perfectly fine… when you are lying flat on your back, because your spine flops over the hole and plugs the leak. If you’re upright at all the spine flops away from the hole and it slowly leaks out, and you get more of this weird frontal headache that gets worse the longer you’re upright, standing there talking to the ER admissions nurse. And the info I had explained that it can progress to seizures and similar the worse it gets, but I only got as far as pain and fuzzy vision. I seriously could only be upright for ten minutes without pain, and had to lie down to resolve it.

That required some medicine-that-looks-like-magic to fix, called a blood patch. Doctors took some of my blood, fresh out of the vein, and inserted it into my spine approximately where the leak should be, so that the clot would cover the leaky patch. Self blood magic. It worked brilliantly, about an hour later.

The CSF tap ordeal confirmed the presence of the oligoclonal bands, and then I got stunted into the public health system, in a department specifically geared towards managing Multiple Sclerosis patients. They debated for a little while, at a multidisciplinary meeting, whether I was really MS or a Clinically Isolated Syndrome (which is like Multiple Sclerosis but without the ‘Multiple’ part), but settled on MS. Yes, Tumblr, I was nearly diagnosed with CIS.

The shoe thing took about a year from when I actively complained to doctors, or about 18 months from the first probable symptoms. That’s approximate because some things that were thought to be pregnancy symptoms could have been due to MS, like fatigue and leg weakness. I’m pretty lucky that I’m comfortable in hospitals and with medical procedures, am reasonably medically literate. I think the magic phrase that got things to happen quickly was ‘these symptoms are greatly affecting my ability to do my job’.

I don’t think my MS has progressed since starting the medication (and I’ll talk about the medication in another post). I’ve acquired one additional brain lesion since diagnosis, but I have no clue what physical symptom it’s associated with.

While some symptoms are better, I still cannot perform surgery to the standard or with the endurance that I used to,so I basically don’t any more. I can do about ten minutes, which is enough to bail a new graduate vet out of trouble, but not enough to take over completely for them. I’ve had a few years to think about it but I don’t know what the MS is going to do to my career, only that I can still practice for now.

It’s not great, but it could be a whole lot worse, and that’s how I got here.

[pregnantpixiedreams]

[ So this is 6 weeks, and i just feel… awful. I’m so sick. And I’m so bloated— at least I think that’s what it is. I can’t be showing this fast.  Ive heard you show faster in your second pregnancy, but  this is way too early for my belly to already be growing this much. So unless I’m having twins or something lol I think it’s just severe bloating. Should have our first scan the week after next and I’ll get to meet our little one for the first time and make sure everything is ok!]

[theivorybilledwoodpecker]

Tennessee’s politicians are passing cruel laws against something they know nothing about − medically essential abortions. I needed one, and it was traumatizing for me and my family that I had to leave Tennessee to get it. Tennesseans must be able to get the care they need at home. A lifelong Tennessean, I became a single mom at age 22, working three jobs to support my daughter while earning my degree. Adalie is 6 now and like me, she’s very social and a little stubborn. About the time she turned 3, I reconnected with a former high school boyfriend and we got married last year. Bryan is such a great stepfather and we both wanted to grow our family. We were ecstatic to learn we were pregnant last November. Each night, at bedtime, Adalie would lie next to me and sing "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" while rubbing my belly. Early on, we learned we were having a girl. We named her Miley Rose, after the song “Flowers” by Miley Cyrus. At 19 weeks, I brought Adalie along with me to share in what I thought would be a routine anatomy scan. But after the scan, I saw a high-risk maternal fetal medicine specialist who explained that Miley’s kidneys, bladder and stomach had not formed as expected and were not functioning. Two of the four chambers of her heart were also not working. She had little-to-no amniotic fluid. She had stopped growing. There were no signs of lung development. She also had a rare brain condition. We were told she had no chance at life. It was definitive. The doctor suggested there were two options– either terminating the pregnancy, or continuing, knowing she would not survive. Because of Tennessee’s cruel ban on abortion, an essential medical procedure, I could not legally get an abortion in my home state. I would have to travel out of state, and my doctor told me that Tennessee law prevented her from offering me any resources in that effort. Our daughter died, but the risk to me was still great Although there was no way of knowing how much longer Miley Rose would survive inside my womb, the longer she was there, the more risk there was to my health and safety. I made the decision to have an abortion. Instead of being able to grieve for her and the future we dreamed of, I had to scramble and start calling clinics in the states that allowed second trimester abortions, book flights, find hotels and arrange transportation. And figure out how to pay for it all. Thankfully, I found a clinic in New York City that could get me in the following week. After I arrived at the clinic, I learned that Miley Rose’s heart was no longer beating. Completely broken, I had to call Bryan and tell him over the phone that our daughter was gone. But the risk to me was not over. The doctor told me that my body hadn’t recognized that she had died, and that there was about a 2-week window before I would become severely at risk of blood clots and infections, including sepsis. I can honor my daughter Miley Rose through my testimony Within an hour, I went into surgery alone. I sat in recovery alone. I grieved the loss of my daughter alone, in a city I’d never been to, around doctors I’d never met before, far from my family. I am so grateful for the caring professionals who treated me with such dignity, but I should never have had to leave home for humane health care–abortion care. I realized that sharing my experience publicly could be a powerful way to honor Miley Rose. That is why I’m joining the Center for Reproductive Rights’ case against Tennessee; it’s why I documented my heartbreaking experience on TikTok. It’s why I’m going to keep fighting these dangerous laws. The autonomy to make personal medical decisions about our lives and futures and health care must be returned to patients like me and our doctors.

[allemantheias]

Parent triangle. Part 4.

Announcement to our parents.

Part 1. Part 2. Part 3. {Part 4.} Part 5. Part 6. Part 7. Part 8 coming soon. Word count: 4073. Warnings can be found in part 1. Read Parent triangle on AO3.

My abs, which were slightly visible before I got pregnant, have morphed into a little baby bump. It's barely noticeable, only people that know I'm pregnant can see it. That's still only Rodolfo, Alejandro and me. I'm eight weeks pregnant now and today is our first ultrasound appointment. Both guys were able to get a few hours off of work to be there with me. It's the first one, the most significant one because we will see our baby for the first time and I want them to both be present. We were almost late to the appointment because my body decided I had to puke my guts out for ten minutes straight. I was glad Rodolfo stayed with me in the bathroom, while I was throwing up on an empty stomach. "I'm thrilled to see our baby!" I was unable to eat from the nerves. After Alejandro and I were asked many questions about our personal health and family health. She asked me questions about my menstrual cycle, if it was regular, yes, and the first day of my last period, which was April third. When she heard everything she needed to know, she left the examination room to get her intern. Rodolfo didn't need to answer questions because Alejandro is the biological father. The gynaecologist asked me if I was okay with a male intern doing the ultrasound while she gives him instructions. Of course I was okay with that. Everyone has to learn. I'm not over ten weeks pregnant yet, so the scan has to be done internally, from inside my vagina. There's not much visible if they would look from my stomach, the baby is too tiny for now. Both guys are anxiously waiting to see their baby too. "Let's look for this little human that's brewing." The gynaecologist sits down on a chair next to the intern, who looks a bit uncomfortable. I assume that's because my legs are open wide and his hand is between them. He's still young, looks to be in his early twenties. The woman guides her student through the procedure, tells him when he needs to do what and when to press what buttons on the machine.

"Please tell me when I'm pressing too hard. This is my first transvaginal scan." He apologizes beforehand.

I smile at him reassuring. "You're doing fine. I'll let you know when it's uncomfortable." The young guy nods, focuses on the machine and moves the transducer inside of me looking for our little baby. I look at the screen of the machine and see some shapes I can't recognise.

"Take your time. Move it a bit slower." The woman points to something on the screen, saw something already with her trained eyes. "There you go, that's it. Try to keep it still now. Do you remember what to look for?" My heart pounds in my throat when I see the shape of a little baby on screen. I look over to the guys and see them both with huge smiles on their faces. Them loving this as much as I do makes me feel like I'm on cloud nine.

"If the embryo is inside of the uterus and not ectopic, if there is a gestational sac and the amount of embryos."

"And what do you see for all of those points?" She asks to make him practice.

"The embryo is inside the uterus. This is the gestational sac." He indicates what's visible on the screen. "And as far as I can see, there's one embryo present." Thank the lord we're not having twins!

"Very good." The doctor praises him. "Now, as a last exercise, can you measure the embryo's length?"

"I'll try." He presses buttons on the machine. "It's eighteen millimetres long, which is perfect for a pregnancy of eight weeks exact."

"Correct, well done. What's the button to hear the heartbeat?"

"This one." He sets his finger on it.

"Are you sure?"

The button is pushed and the sound of a fast pounding heart fills the room. Oh my god! This is our baby's heartbeat? It's so fast! I get a bit lightheaded from excitement and lay my hand on my eyes to make it dark.

"Lau, are you okay?" Rudy whispers when he notices I'm not looking at our baby anymore.

"Yes, just a bit dizzy from too much adrenaline at once." I smile to let him know I'm fine.

"You earned a break. I'll get you again for the next appointment." The gynaecologist sits down after the student gets up and pushes the heartbeat button to stop the sound.

"Thanks for letting me practice on you, on your first scan." He shyly tells me.

"No problem. Good luck." I see him leave the room with a red face.

"Let's calculate your due date and then we're done for this appointment." She explains how it is calculated and why like this. "Which makes January eight your baby's due date." The woman hands me a thick, square piece of paper. An ultrasound picture of our baby! It's so adorable! I hand it over to Alejandro and Rodolfo, who can't stop staring at it. "Lastly, you need your blood drawn. That has to be done at least three times, once in every trimester. The order for the draw is ready in their system. Do you know where to find the unit?"

"Yes, I used to be a regular." I jokingly answer, I had to get my blood tested a lot when I moved here six and a half years ago.

"Okay. Enjoy your pregnancy and we'll see each other again the next time." After my blood was drawn, the guys made me eat something. Alejandro also observed that I was a bit off. When I got something down, and it stayed down, they dropped me off at my house.

"See you tonight, querido (dear). Rudy will be home at five, and I'll be back at six thirty." Ale puts his lips on my cheek and takes a last look at the picture of our baby. "Don't let your mom see that yet." We'll tell our parents we're expecting a baby at dinner tonight. Terrifying, but also so exciting!

"I'll keep it hidden in my bag until everyone is present at dinner."

"Good idea. Well, we have to go back to work." He fleetingly kisses my lips. "Love you, cariño (darling)." My cheeks blush. I'm still not used to them telling me they love me since I joined their relationship. Not this type of romantic love, they of course loved me as their friend before and told me often, but this is different. Alejandro gets back into his car and drives away. I close the door and rest up for a while, before I have to do groceries for tonight. I'll be cooking dinner at their place because I can't fit nine people in my apartment. Alejandro and Rodolfo have a massive house close to the beach, away from the crowded city. I live in a small apartment on the edge of the city. "I'm so scared." I whisper to Alejandro, who's waiting with me in the kitchen for the meat to be done, leaving my piece longer because I can't eat it underdone anymore. "What if Rudy's or your parents don't like me as your girlfriend?" Their parents know I'm their best friend. "What if my dad disowns me?"

"It's going to be fine, cariño (darling). If anything does happen, we're still here for you. We will always have your back." He presses a kiss on my temple and turns me around, stands behind me with his hands on my stomach. "Míralos (Look at them), our parents seem to get along already." I see them laughing together, my mom too. My dad doesn't care, as I expected. He's just drinking his beer, which he insisted on even after my mom tried to change his mind to have him pick a soda instead. So the alcoholic got his alcohol fix. He better behaves tonight! I'm glad we only got two cans of beer for him. "Sweetheart, don't worry so much. We'll keep him under control if he tries anything."

"Yeah, we can take him, we're strong soldiers." Rodolfo lightens my tense mood, even makes me smile. "You're safe with us, princesa." He kisses my cheek and goes back to setting the dinner table. I decide to help him and grab nine sets of cutlery. "We wanted to introduce all of you to someone." Alejandro starts talking when it's quiet for a bit. I'm sure all of us three feel nervous.

"Honey, we know Lauren, she's been your best friend since the day she started working for you." His mom says.

"Yes, but she's our girlfriend now." He tells with a proud smile on his face. All eyes focus on me. Their parents look confused, probably because they've always been gay.

"When did that happen?" Rudy's mother asks interested. I'm glad they are not mad about this.

"One and a half months ago, but we've known for at least five years that we liked her more than just a friend." Rudy explains.

"You are wasting your life, Lauren." My dad is the first one to voice his opinion on the unconventional situation. "At least we don't have to expect grandkids from you." He shoves his chair back and gets up.

"Well dad, I'm already pr-" Before I can finish my sentence, Alejandro holds his hand on my mouth, prevents me from talking while my dad leaves and closes the front door with a loud bang.

"Don't say it, doll. You'll make his anger worse. He doesn't have to know for now." He whispers, so the other parents won't hear. I knew this would happen! Why did he insist on coming when he would get mad anyway? He knows how he acts on alcohol! I remove myself from Alejandro's hands and go outside, cry on the wooden bench in the garden. It's below the kitchen window, great.

"Rudy, you should comfort her." Alejandro suggests.

"Me? But you are the one that always hits the sweet spots to make her feel better again."

"That's why you should try it, I assure you it'll be fine."

"Fino (Fine)." Rudy's footsteps appear outside and he sits next to me on the bench. "Lo siento (I'm sorry), babygirl. This should have been a good memory for all of us." His arms wrap around me and he dries my cheeks.

"I knew he would get mad. I should've told him to stay home, even if that would make him furious too. He's such an entitled asshole!" I wipe my cheeks, which are already wet again, with the back of my hands. "I hate him! I hate him so much! I don't want him to ever know that we're having a baby. Not this one, not future ones."

"I completely agree. There was no need for him to act like an asshole at all."

"That's just him. I don't know why my mom refuses to divorce him. He's been having these outbursts ever since he started drinking lots." I get up from the bench and dry my cheeks again. "Thanks for making me feel better again, Rudy."

"No problem, mi corazón (my heart)." He opens the door to the kitchen and I follow him inside. "Your mom went to talk to your dad." Alejandro's mother tells me when I walk past her in the hallway.

"Good." I nod and set my foot on the first step of the stairs.

"Lauren?"

"Yes?" I turn around.

"I know the guys are serious about you, I've heard lots about you since they met you, so I want you to know that you are very welcome in our family. The circumstances may be unconventional, but Alejandro's father and I have always supported him in his life choices, even when we didn't like it at first." She holds my hand and squeezes it encouragingly. "As with the time he told us he wanted to join the military at just sixteen, which he then did."

"Thank you, Miss Vargas." I'm glad she isn't puking me out like my dad did.

"Can I.. ask you something personal?" She looks at me cautiously.

"I- uh- Sure?" I wonder what she wants to know.

"I'm very sorry if this is a sensitive topic for you, but I have been wondering since we arrived if you are pregnant?" She asks in a soft voice. My jaw drops and my body heats up. She noticed? Out of nowhere I get emotional and start to cry. Hormonal mess that I am! Maybe it has something to do with my father's reaction too? "Oh, mi hija (my daughter), I didn't want to upset you. You have the same glow Alejandro's sister had before she gave birth. Lo siento, dulzura (I'm sorry, sweetheart)." The fact that she just called me daughter has me even more emotional.

"Mamá, what happened?" Alejandro walks into the hallway and I can't stop more tears from appearing. "Cariño (darling), everything's okay." He pulls me against his chest, closes his strong arms around me. His scent calms me down a little.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't have asked if she was pregnant. Idea tonta (Silly idea)." His mother explains.

"Oh doll, your hormones are all over the place today. You need a bath to relax after dinner." He kisses my lips fleetingly.

"¿Es ella? (Is she?)"

"Sí, we wanted to announce it after telling everyone that Lauren is part of our relationship too now."

"How far along is she?"

"Eight weeks."

Rudy also sets foot into the hallway, is confused that we're standing here. "Are you coming for dinner? It's ready in a minute." His eyes look for what has happened that I'm crying.

"Who of you is the father? Quiero decir- (I mean-) biologically?"

"Ale is." Rudy replies, now knowing why I was crying. "I'll put everything on the table."

"Mi amor (my love), we will always have your back. Everything will be fine." Alejandro reassures me. "Come, let's have dinner. That'll do you good." I don't feel like saying anything at the moment, so I go to the kitchen.

"Lo siento, querido (I'm sorry, dear), I hope I didn't upset her too much."

"Don't worry, mamá. You didn't cause this, her father did. It bothers her a bit too much."

"I can understand. His behaviour was not necessary. I think it's lovely." My mom is back when I arrive in the kitchen. "Dad left."

"I didn't want him here anyway." I sit on the chair next to Rudy, in the middle of the three seats on the long side of the dining table, and lay my head on his shoulder.

"Hola mi corazón (Hi my heart), do you still want to share information with the others?" He whispers with his hand on my inner thigh.

"I don't mind anymore. Ale's mom knows, so why not?" I'm not in the mood to tell them myself, though.

"They will love it, don't worry."

"Dinner looks and smells amazing. Did you make it all on your own?" Rodolfo's mom asks me while everyone is scooping food on their plate.

"She did."

"I did not, both of them helped me after they got home from work."

"She did ninety percent of it." Alejandro backs up our boyfriend when he takes the seat next to me.

"Well, it's lovely, sweetheart." She smiles and starts eating, as does everyone else. "We wanted all of you here together, because we have other news to share." Rudy fills some empty wine glasses while talking. "Very tiny news." He takes the three small gifts from the cabinet above the sink and sits back down next to me. Every pair of parents gets a package shoved in front of them. My mom on her own.

"Why are you smiling?" Alejandro's father asks his wife.

"No reason. You open it." She acts like she doesn't know about the surprise and winks at me. All parents open their gifts. My mom is the last one to open the box and take out the baby onesie, looks at the others' packages for affirmation of what she's holding. We bought them all a romper with My grandparents are the best! on it.

"Isn't it glorious? Our kids are having a baby." Alejandro's mother reaches over the table and holds my hands, squeezes them in endearment.

"Who of you is the father?" Rudy's dad wonders.

"Alejandro is. The next one will be mine." Last night Rudy said he wants to get me pregnant when we are ready for a second baby.

"How did that happen?" His mother wants to know.

"We got wasted and ended up in bed together." It's adorable how his face turns red.

"I assume it was a big surprise, then?" Alejandro's mom sips from her wineglass.

"Yeah, absolutely." I sigh.

"How far are you?" My mom finally talks, and she's not mad!

"Just eight weeks today."

"Congrats honey, I'm happy for you." She smiles at me.

"I'm glad dad isn't here. I don't want him to know."

"I won't tell him, unless you want me to do that sometime later."

"Maybe, he needs to cool off first."

"When is your due date?"

"January eight." I answer many more questions from all parents. All of them being excited about us having a baby makes me feel better after how my dad reacted earlier tonight. We also share the ultrasound picture we got at the scan this morning. "Thanks for the delicious meal, dulzura (sweetheart). Enjoy your pregnancy." Alejandro's mother puts a kiss on my cheek. "Let me know if we can do anything for you."

"I will, thanks. Goodnight." I wave shortly and say goodbye to my mother next, who's also ready to leave.

"Take care, honey. I'll talk to your dad about his behaviour tonight."

"Mom.. do you think I'm wasting my life this way?" My dad's words hurt, even though I know I shouldn't care about anything he says.

"No. As long as you are happy, I'm happy for you too. If this unconventional relationship makes you happy, who am I to tell you you can't? Same goes for your dad. Something that doesn't follow social standards doesn't have to be a bad thing. You seem a lot happier since a few weeks." She looks up to the stairs for a second when Alejandro walks down. "Your baby will be loved dearly by three amazing parents." She strokes my cheek and turns around, goes to her car. "Goodbye, honey." How did dad go home? I don't even care, to be honest. "Your bath is ready, cariño (darling)." Alejandro's arms wrap around my stomach as I stick the ultrasound picture on the fridge door with a star-shaped magnet. "I can't believe we made that little bubble."

"Me neither. I can't wait to put more pictures here."

"Hey, you lovebirds, I'm going out for a drink with our friends from 141." Rodolfo walks up to us and kisses us both. "I won't be home too late."

"Don't get so drunk that you'll spill our secrets this early."

"No promises." He walks away with a grin on his face.

"The asshole!" Alejandro laughs.

"I'm your asshole!" Is yelled from the living room. 

"Your asshole is mine, indeed."

"Enjoy the twosome. Bye!" The front door shuts.

"Bath, now." Alejandro pushes me towards the stairs. I get rid of my clothes when we enter the bathroom, just like he does. I can't help myself to look at my stomach in the mirror. It's barely visible, only because the defined muscles that I used to have are gone. "Come, get in." Both of us get inside the hot water.

"This is what I need after today." I rest my head on his chest when he puts his arm around my shoulders. This is relaxing.

"How are you feeling after what happened before dinner?" He kisses the top of my head.

"Better, but I still hate how my dad acted today. I didn't want him to be here and he just did anyway, because he doesn't respect me at all."

"Es un pedazo de mierda (He's a piece of shit)."

"I don't want him to ever see our kids."

"I'll personally make sure he never will." He promises me. "Now let's get you a relaxing bath. Lay down on the platform." I do what he wants and get out of the water, put my back on the marbled surface and my heels on the edge. The cold sends shivers through my body, but I forget about it when Alejandro dives between my legs and eats me like I haven't fed him for the past few days. He wastes no second to get two fingers inside, pumps them against my sensitive spot. He spoils my cavern with his skilled fingers. Loud moans escape my lips from the intense stimulation and without any effort he has me reach my climax. "I love how easy you can come."

"Only you and Rudy make me come this fast. No others have gotten me off this quick." With a deep sigh I slide back into the hot water.

"Good, I'm far from done with you." The tone in which he says it gives me goosebumps in the warm water and makes my lower abdomen tingle. Just when I think I can recover for a bit, he roughly pushes me with my upper body on the cold platform. My nipples stiffen from the cold marble. Alejandro immediately enters me with a deep thrust, stretches and fills me, has me cry out from pleasure. "I can't get enough of you, doll." While moving at a relentless pace, he bends my arms on my back and holds them together at my wrists with one hand. With his free hand he smacks my buttcheek, after which he firmly grips it and then repeats the process. That's going to leave marks again. His hand slides over my buttocks and also over my asshole a few times. Is he going to do something with it? He bends down and kisses my shoulder blades. With his thumb, he gives pressure on my sphincter and not much later lets it slide in. The feeling is amazing and I come with a loud moan. Alejandro pulls me up by my hair and kisses me passionately. "I can't last much longer like this. Get on top of me." He demands before he pulls out and sits back down. He helps me on his lap and holds his cock up so I can lower myself on him. I put my weight on him and he eases inside. We both moan. When he fills me up to my cervix I stop moving and take a moment to adjust to the feeling. I move my hips up and down and the water sloshes against the edges to the rhythm of my movements. Every now and then Alejandro pushes me down harder, after putting his hands on my waist. I wrap my arms around his neck and shoulders and kiss him. He thrusts upwards as he pulls me down. This way it seems like there's extra pressure on my sensitive spot. I put my hands on the sides of his neck and bite his lower lip. Immediately he kisses me back roughly and pushes me even harder on his erection. His left hand is on my hip and with his thumb he stimulates my clit.

"I oh- feel you so g- oh!" I can't utter any more words and dig my nails into his shoulders. Alejandro lets out a growling moan and with his hand he grips my buttocks. He firmly squeezes the flesh of my ass and I let out a squeal. The strong stimulation on my clit combined with his deep thrusts, make me reach my third high accompanied by lots of moans. I rest my face in his neck, exhausted from this lovemaking session, while he keeps moving my hips.

Alejandro holds me still when he's as deep as possible, and spills his seed inside of me while grunting from pleasure. "You're so amazing, love." I let him slip out of me and turn around, sit between his legs and Alejandro puts his arms around me, places sweet kisses on the side of my neck and on my shoulders. We stay like this until the water gets cold.

[eliasneln]

sept. 7, 2024

tw: pregnancy, slight mention of family trauma

it's 6 something in the morning on a saturday and i dunno just got some thoughts.

so update: i had a baby! she was due in june, but wanted to arrive early and was born in may. i kept my pregnancy pretty quiet on social bc i had to this weird fear of folks finding out. i dunno it's weird while i was pregnant i felt like a teen mom even though i'm a grown ass woman, married and with a career lmao.

being a parent is def challenging, but in all honesty it's at the same pretty rad (for me). i never thought i would have kids, like i always had a laissez-faire (is that how you spell it idk) about them-- like I won't be upset if I did or didn't have 'em, ya know. i was 18 weeks when i found out i was preggers and yeah at first i was scared SHITLESS but as the journey progressed I pretty much found peace.

being pregnant sucked ass i'm not gonna lie. and so did giving birth. and i'm set on having one kid. one and done, my dudes!! one baby is fine with me; i don't think i wanna put her in a difficult position of being an older sibling like I had growing up. idk maybe it's an asian/filipino thing for the eldest sister to carry a heavy burden-- at least it was for me.

anyways, i had my 34th birthday in august, and it was a very chill birthday and i'm happy to see it this far. i made it a challenge to find joy in every day of august -- whether it's making time for a journaling or drawing session, working out (yes i can finally lift weights again yesssss), or even going on a walk with my daughter-- and i think i did a pretty solid job accomplishing that goal.

it's weird being in my 30s have made me uhhhh a lot more chill and made me taking a slower approach to a lot of things. i'm finding myself more mindful of shit. or maybe all of this happening bc i'm finally listening to my therapist and actually do the goddamn homework haha.

okay yeah, that's it really. i couldn't draw a lot this year bc of carpel tunnel from the pregnancy. my body is still adjusting itself back so there are some soreness in my fragile bones haha. i have been drawing a lot since the baby was born, but mainly in my sketchbook and honestly i've been too lazy/tired to scan and upload them. i'll get to it eventually i'm sure.

ciao!

[iamdarkness]

Iris

Chapter 6.

Friend.

Alfonse and Sharena meet a dear friend and teacher.

Zacharias carried Alfonse into one the infirmary tents, followed closely by Feraht who carried a protesting Bel. She had been hit with various spells and was unaware of her bleeding from various places besides her twisted ankle. He could hear Feraht quietly telling her that her ankle was already too swollen to put weight on it and that it was not a problem to carry her as she was not heavy at all.

Zacharias laid Alfonse on one of the cots next to a blond girl that could not be too much older than his own sister Veronica. She looked feverish as well. He felt a knot in his stomach at the mental image of his little sister laying on the cot hurt and in the same condition. Without giving it too much thought he sat in between the cots and brushed away the blond hair sticking to the feverish face. The green eyes tried to open but failed. If they had not arrived in time , those monsters would be in possession of these children and who knows what they would be doing to them. He had been told what the cult had done, including child sacrifices. His breath caught in his throat and he swallowed hard.

-Sharena too?- He hears Bel ask worriedly.

-Yes Mam and Bertha. You were lucky to only get the scrapes and cuts. Although the foot does look very bad. - Said the lancer Aleen to her. Indeed the foot looked so swollen , the healer was having trouble taking her boot off. It had a bump the size of a tomato. Zacharias wondered about the familiarity the servant talked to the Lady. Bel nodded at the lancer, then looking to the healer who was checking her for internal bleeding. She asked.

-Can you please fix it enough to walk a little? I need to check up on my daughter if you don’t mind.

- I can go ask Lord Andreas my lady. I also need to report.- Said Feraht.

-My lady since you are being tended to. Please give me leave to take Gudrum to the healers. He was hurt in the posses of defending the young lady Sharena and refused to be seen until you arrived safe.

-Please take him to the healer!- Bel exclaimed. Aleen went out the tent.

-Your retainer is right My Lady.- The healer said after a magic scan.- You are lucky. All your wounds are superficial and the ankle will heal in a short period after I fix it. It is a blessing it is not broken.-She paused and looked at the lady smiling.- And the best of all is that your pregnancy was not affected. Congratulations.

-Eh..mm…Pregnancy? How…how long…how far along?

-You did not know? Let me see…Umm…Ah! It is still very early… Little wonder you still did not know. I would say three weeks. I am surprised you are fine after falling off of a horse my…My lady?- The healer stopped. Bel was trembling like a leaf and an instant later she hear her sobbing.

-A baby…He left me a baby…Thank you…- Bel said but the healer was not sure if she was talking to her or her fallen husband. Being Emblan, the healer had forgotten who her husband was and what had happened to him. Now she felt awkward and a little ashamed to have just blurted out the information.

-My condolences Lady Andreas. I... Am so sorry...- The healer finally said and after checking on Alfonse and tending to his needs exited the tent to help with the rest of the patients. As much as she would have wanted to stay and help the lady there was a lot of work to do.

Zacharias watched saddened, as Bel turned to the sleeping Alfonse and changed the cloth on his brow, still crying softly. She then turned to watch Sharena and figured she wanted to do the same to her but was too far away and across the boy Alfonse and in her state she could not.

-I can take care of her. Do not worry.

-Thank you. You seem very good with children.

-I have a little sister. I am sorry about your husband. I met him days before the last battle started. He was a great warrior and a good man.

-Yes he was…and a good parent too.

-Yes. He was talking about you and your little girl. Seemed to miss you a lot and I could tell he was happy to be able to see you again.

-Ah…it was that night. What are you to Lord…

-Zacharias? - The both of them turned when they heard the voice coming from the tent entrance. It was the Baron.- Lady Andreas. Lord Andreas need to talk to you both together.

-The children need to be taken care of.- Said Zacharias with a knitted brow.

-Of course.- Said the Baron and in that instant he looked almost servile. He looked back outside of the tent and called out to the healer.- You will care for the children and Lady Andreas exclusively. Do you understand? They are not to be alone for any circumstances! Who knows if there’s still vermin around.

-Yes My Lord.

Saying this the Baron and Zacharias helped Bel out of the tent and into one of the rooms of the nearest houses that turned out to be an Inn. Inside Lord Andreas waited for them.

The baron and Zacharias helped her into a chair and made to go outside but was stopped by the Lord.

-Please stay. It is better to get on with this matter first while we are in a better state of mind.- The Lord of the Mountains said to the two. They looked at each other and sat around the table that had been placed in the room. Lord Andreas then turned to Bel.- Daughter. I… I apologize for having to bring you here in your state and making the Lords bring you. I am sure you will understand this is a delicate matter that can not be discussed where other people may intrude.

-It is fine father. Go on.

-This matter was discussed with Alfonse and his Majesty King Gustav before the attacks. This young man presented to you as Zacharias is in truth one of the heirs to the Emblan throne Prince Bruno. He was the one that closed the gate so the attackers would not pursue Deana and Oly. Indeed as illegitimate as his birth is, he along with his sister are the only hers with the gift of the Goddess Embla. This is what matters in Emblan Society to legitimize the claims to the throne. As it is only the line of the first Queen and King that can carry the gifts.

-I see…Wait…Alfonse …- Bel started confused, but stopped as it may be a delicate matter. Bel remembered that Alfonse had said that he had fought at the last battle and it had been him who had struck the final blow that killed the late emperor who would have been Bruno's father and first cousin to the Empress. This had been the reason Alfonse had been made general of all the armed forces of Askr so early in his life. The Empress had married obscenaly fast to a noble and had bore him a daughter soon after. She remembered Alfonse telling her the late man had a bastard son product of an infidelity and Bel understood why the Empress was not so sad by his passing.

- That is a talk for later times daughter.- Adrien told her thinking she meant to ask why her husband and himself could open portals. He cleared his throat and went on.-As I was saying the situation of his birth and the gift had made for conspiracies among the rest of the line to the throne, has put at risk his life.

- Some of the nobles think I want to harm my own sister for the place on the throne, which is the furthest from the truth. They think that because I was the result of my late father’s indiscretion I have no familial link with her and no love between us.

-With this in mind a plan was made to hide him away. As he has lived most of his life in province with a handful of people as company. This include his sister to whom he has served as a magic teacher and the Baron; so most nobles have never seen him. This helps his situation greatly. The plan was to say that he was exiled by the Empress to appease the nobles. While he is safe in our care. Gustav agreed with this plan and Alfonse volunteered to host him in our home as if he was one of our distant relatives.

-Oh! If Alfonse agreed then, I agree. I saw you with Sharena…- She said to Bruno.- I can see they do not know you. Of course they still would want you out of the way. Does this mean you forfeit your place to the throne?

-If it was up to me, it would my lady, but the gift ensures the place even when I do not desire it and I will use it if it means saving my sister.- Those words were said in a solemn tone but Bel could see the sentiment behind them in his expressive violet eyes.

-For now it is better for you to be out of harm’s way. Welcome to the family. Alfonse may be gone but father and I will make sure you are safe.- She says smiling. Bruno thanks her smiling.- He is going back to the mountains with us then father? And the Baron as well?

- Yes. For now only Zacharias will remain with us. Having the Baron as guest may attract suspicion, but he is going to be living close by.

-Yes my lady with your father’s help I will be able to buy a state near the sea on the East side of the mountains. It will be close enough to the border…for appearance’s sake.

- Oh…otherwise they will think you were truly a spy…- The man nods.

-And I can keep an eye on the situation in Embla and the prince. In other words: Spy.- He says smiling.- But for a good reason. After all. I have known the Askr nobles and the idea the people have of them in the empire is preposterous. I trust them, but those who do not know them believe all kinds of lies told to them by the late Emperor’s sympathizers.

- I am afraid the Empire has fallen under a wave of corruption that will make it difficult to wash away. War seems more imminent as time goes by.- Says Zacharias and he looks troubled and sad.

- We will have time to plan something your Highness. Your safety is the utmost importance as of now. I will go and prepare for our departure as soon as you think if most convenient Lord Andreas.

-There are not many wounded and as much as I do not want to move the children they will be better cared for at the castle; so you will be going back as soon as possible. Do you agree daughter.

-Yes. Henriette and Gustav need to know and be there for them as much as they can.

-Then that matter is settled.

-We will be on our way. Your Highness?- The Baron said and indicated for both of them to leave. Bruno nodded and followed him out.

- A question before you go?- Bel asks turning to the retreating pair.- What does Embla know about what the Hel Cult wanted with us?

-The official report I sent to the capital was that they wanted to help Hel get revenge on both kingdoms. I have already talked you your late husband and Lord Andreas about what we knew. - At this the Baron looked at Lord Andreas. They bad discussed the matter previously. The Baron and the prince had realized the truth of what it meant to the late General, that the target was his wife and his young cousin and had made away with the evidence and had silenced the people who knew about it besides themselves. They knew how volatile this information could be and how it would be used in Embla against these innocent people.- We decided to leave the information about you and the heir of the King out of the report. We do not want more trouble to come to you from the sympathizers in the Empire. - At this Bruno assented. He hated to lie but he had been told that the Lady was not aware of who the real heir of Líf was and what it meant for her. He had agreed that all of the information about it had to be hidden away or destroyed.

- Do not worry my lady. You are safe and so will your dear ones.- Said Bruno.

-Thank you…Zacharias.- Bel said to get used to the name.

After the pair left, the Lord made a long pause before speaking.

- Daughter. I have been briefed about the incident…there is no easy day to inform you.. - He sighs and Bel could see he looked…defeated? Sad? Nervous?. Bel was worried. The man never showed so much feelings.- We do not know where Deana went.

- What? You didn’t have this planned? I though…- She started. She was crying now and was trying her best not to fall into hysteric. She knew her father was smart and would find out where Deana had gone. At least she wanted to believe so.

-No. I was not informed she could open portals. Henriette failed to tell us if you remember.- Bel nodded but she had thought he at least had been informed.- I sent Feraht and other mages to check the residual magic and I will go as well. After all… If I can open the portals I may be able to tell where the portal led...Deana may still be able to return…although…

-Feraht said she could not have made it…My poor baby…alone…in a strange place…Father we can not leave until we find out!…But the children…

- I will stay. Worry not.- The man said kneeling by her feet and taking her hands in his.- I will do all it takes to find our little girl. Go with the children. They are in our care and I know you will protect them. I do not expect another attack this early with so many of them killed.

-I will take care of them father. I gave my word and I want them safe…besides we have Zacharias to keep safe as well….- She paused and then added.- Father…please do find out where Oly went… I want her with us when the baby is born.- She said and smiled through the silent tears. Adrien looked surprised and then overwhelmed by the different conflicting feelings he cried silently. He had lost his only son whom he had resented all of his life for the death of his wife. The gilt he felt and sadness at not being able to make it up to him had consumed him the last coupled of years and now he was lost and in the worst possible way. He knew his son was not only dead, but he suffered and there was nothing he could do to help him. And now he had lost his granddaughter. He had promised his son that should something happen to him, he would keep his daughter safe. He had failed at everything. Yet here her daughter has given him hope. The hope of a new life. A blessing.

-Daughter. We are blessed.- He said and embraced her.

[Line break]

Bel went back to the castle at Djuprgat. Zacharias and her were caring for Sharena and Alfonse. Her foot was useless still but she could manage by sitting by Sharena inside the wagon on the way back. It took them less time because they were not resting at all. They all knew the importance. They reached the city the next day. A messenger had been sent and Henriette was waiting for them.

Even in the infirmary Bel and Zacharias would not leave the siblings. Gustav had come to see them a couple of times and Henriette passed all of her free time with them. It was not much and already the preparations were being made to depart to the capital where other matters were waiting for the royal couple. Bel and Zacharias would stay along with the children and Lady Klara.

Henriette had informed Gustav about Deana and he who had always been courteous to her, but never warm had understood Deana’s desire to remain hidden, he still had lamented not knowing her better.

Alfonse woke up completely on the third day. Bel had gone to get evaluated again when this happened. Zacharias who was reading a book about local history had felt the stare and turned to see the boy looking intensely at him. The gaze seemed to be signalizing him. Zacharias arched an eyebrow.

-You are in the infirmary.

-I know.

-..because you were attacked and were feverish for days.

-Are you a healer?

-No.

- I saw your face…many times… in dreams…

-You were coming in and out of your unconsciousness frequently. My name is…

-You felt warm…- Alfonse said almost in a whisper mostly in recollection.-You stayed with me all this time. Why?

-I..with you and your sister. You are correct. Cousin Bel has been…

-Sharena? Is she alright? Where is she?- Alfonse suddenly exclaimed looking around until his frenetic eyes landed on the figure on the bed across the room. He tried to get up but was still too weak to do so.

-She has not come out of her sleep but is otherwise in good condition. You were more hurt by the fall and the spells. We still don’t know what they hit you with. What do you remember?- Alfonse seemed reassured by the news. He turned and remained a while with his eyes closed.

- I…I don’t remember much…Except that we were going to the mountains I suppose to visit cousin Alfonse, Bel and Oly. - The boy said trying to remember. Zacharias’s brows furrowed at the mention of the fallen general.- No…he… he died, didn’t he?- Zacharias nodded but the child had his eyes still closed.- We were attacked in the castle but I do not know by whom…..He died by our tree…Then we were attacked on the way to the mountains…but I can’t remember…What happened?… Was it Embla?… Are we at war with them again so soon?…I just…The only thing I remember is …your face telling me I would be alright… That I was safe…

- I suppose, the theory was right. You were hit with multiple spells before Cousin Bel covered you with her body. Probably a combination of memory and stunning spells. She was not hit herself by sheer luck.

-I see…Who are you? You have called Lady Andreas “cousin” twice.- Alfonse now looked at Zacharias with suspicion.

- A little late to ask names. Don’t you think? - He says eyes twinkling. Zacharias was not the kind to be joking lightly but Alfonse had just woken up from a horrible experience and he wanted to make him feel at ease.- But I suppose there were more pressing matters and no room for courtesy from the prince of our nation.

-Prince..I…I apologize. I was worried about my sister.- Alfonse blushed a little.

-Understandable. I was jesting your highness. My name is Zacharias. I am a distant relative of Lord Andreas. - Zacharias said smiling and proceeded to tell the boy the story they had come up with as cover. On the telling Zacharias argued with himself about whether to tell Alfonse all the missing memories about the incident. He decided to talk to Bel before doing it.

-So you will be living with us now?… I mean with cousin Bel?- Alfonse amended and he blushed again by the mistake.

-Yes. By the way. I will have to leave you for a while she has been gone too long and may need help coming back.

-Why? Is she hurt or Oly? Is Oly alright!?

-I…-Zacharias saw the boy seemed alarmed and decided to try and calm him down.- Cousin Bel twisted her ankle very badly but she is fine. I am not sure where Oly is right now.- He said avoiding Alfonse’s eyes.

-Oh…I suppose she is playing somewhere. She is always so happy…

==I do hope so too…wherever she is.== Zacharias thought but said nothing as he went out the door to talk to Bel.

[Line break]

Alfonse stood looking at the distant mountains. His father figure was gone, his best friend had disappeared and his memories were not back. Cousin Bel and Uncle Andreas had explained to him what had happened.

Bel had not agreed on not telling at least Alfonse the truth about Hel but the boy was still not her child and so she had to help lie to him about the attack. Gustav and Henriette wanted their kids to grow up nightmare free and Bel could understand that but she also understood that cultists would not give up on their efforts and and she was sure there were more and very powerful members still around. She wanted them to be ready like she always did. She was a worrier and her motto was always “Hope for the best and prepare for the worst”.

Alfonse had been told that it had been a rouge Emblan revel group who supported the ideals of the late Emperor. He was a war mongering man who wanted to gain more land and was partial to hostilities with Askr. The war had waged for years. Bel had been a newly wed when Alfonse had gone to the last battle and had killed the late Emperor.

Adrien had come two days after Alfonse and Sharena who also had forgotten many details about the attack and told them, Oly was lost in where he thought was the World of Steel. This was later confirmed when Zacharias who had been very close to the attacker had seen something inside the portal that after drawing a sketch turned out to be, the rear end of a car with a licence plate that as Bel had said, was of European origin.

Bel had been inconsolable and her only outlet was to take care of Sharena, Alfonse and Zacharias whom she had taken as her protegee. Alfonse would have felt jealous if he had not seen her cry so long and him console her so tenderly, just as Alfonse would his own sister.

The only good that had come out of this in Alfonse’s opinion was that Bel was having a baby. He swore to himself to get stronger and protect the child, since he had not been strong enough to protect his best friend Oly.

He looked back at the training ground where Zacharias was instructing his sister on how to use the lance. Zacharias was a mysterious youth. He talked about himself seldom and Bel had hinted it was because of the situation of his birth. Alfonse understood even thought he had no problem with it, but he thought that given time Zacharias would come around and open himself to them. After all he seemed like a lonely person who cherished the right company. Zacharias was ever close to either Bel, his sister or himself. Even more than his now retainer and instructor Einar. Bel had asked his mother before they had gone away to the capital, if it would be alright for Sharena to be trained not just as a hobby like most members of high society were but, just like Alfonse had been trained. Trained to be a warrior. Her mother had agreed but Sharena had not wanted another instructor that was not Zacharias. Zacharias had agreed to train her himself.

The youth had proved to be a very proficient and patient instructor in Alfonse’s opinion. He new well how to deal with Sharena’s extra energy and enthusiasm. Specially now that she wanted to train physically but was limited to theory and strategy because of her resent ordeal. He made the teachings fun and engaging so the princess was always attentfull and even Alfonse himself would be interested in the lessons. So much so in fact that he had asked for sparring cessions with the blond man when he felt wholly recovered.

- Thinking of Oly?- Alfonse heard Zacharias’s voice behind him. He turned to see Bel and Sharena’s retreating backs Zacharias then added.. - We are taking a break. Sharena is very enthusiastic but she needs to take a rests. They have gone to bring lunch and tea.- Alfonse nodded.

- Yes. I am still thinking on how we are going to rescue her. Great uncle Andreas has taken fault at her disappearance…but I know it would not have been him who opened the portal to the world of Steel. I do not recall much but I know he was not with us and he would have known where he had sent them. So who opened the portal? Was it Oly? That would make sense. Cousin Alfonse could open portals and she should be able to do so too. And if it was her…where did she go? How are we ever to find her location even if we know she is in the World of Steel? How would we know at what point in modern history she arrived to? And even if we open the portal at the precise location who can guarantee that Oly would still be anywhere near?- Alfonse sounded more desperate with each question that came out of his mouth. Zacharias felt very bad about it and considered telling him what he had heard by mistake when he was going to the infirmary to take Bel to have breakfast. He looked back at Alfonse and saw the unshed tears and the strength he was using to not let them fall. Zacharias looked back and then around to see if no one was hearing him.

-Alfonse. I know we have met but recently; yet the circumstances of our meeting have been …special and I consider you, Sharena and Bel to be very dear to me already. I have not met much people with such good heart towards me that were not part of my family and all of this despite of the tragedies you all have lived through and your titles. You have taken me in as part of your family; so I feel that you are becoming part of mine own…indeed…at this time you are all I have in this Kingdom.- Zacharias said and he was not lying. The children and Bel had taken him in as if he had always been part of their circle or immediate family. This was something that not only moved him personally but that gave him hope for the future of both nations, but also scared him much. He felt that he needed to protect the children and teach them about the world. It was great that they were this good but it was a danger for people in their position. He had decided that these children were a light that needed to be protected for the world to be a better place and that they needed to become the regents of the land, not only for Askr but for Embla as well. So at that moment he swore to protect the children even from himself. He only lamented that his sister would not grow up with such influence and company.

-I…have never had a friend that was not someone who wanted influence or was part of the family…indeed I have never have and actual friend. Cousin Andreas was my mentor and cousin Bel is more like an older sister and mother figure and Oly- He sighs and pauses.- .…I confess I am not much for being close to people…exactly for this reason. It hurts so much when they leave you or when they disappear…but I too feel…a bond of sorts with you… as does my sister of course. I may be bold enough to say I see you as a true friend. -Alfonse said blushing because it was taking a lot for him to confess such feelings to Zacharias. Something that were it some one else he would not have voiced, but Zacharias had proven in the short amount of time to be not only a good person, but a hones one too. He had passed Alfonse’s scrutiny and he had seen the sincerity of his feelings for them. He also saw how he treated others who were considered beneath him and his kindness to them pleased Alfonse.

- Friends then?- Asks the older male and offered Alfonse a hand. Alfonse looked at it and felt something inside him that he never felt before. Trust. The trust of one friend to another. A kind of brotherhood he never thought he would feel given his title and situation. And fear. A fear that he felt was worth the risk.

-Friends.- Alfonse said taking Zacharias’ hand and smiled shyly. - And… I talk for my sister who I know quite well feels the same way I do.

Zacharias smile broadened. - In the name of this new found friendship I want to ask if you could accompany me tonight. There is much I would like to talk to you about and I need for you to listen to.- Alfonse nodded and agreed to meet later that evening after dinner. Sharena would not be able to go of course being younger and having to go rest by the healer’s advice.

[ Line break]

Zacharias’ mind kept coming back to Bel’s words as he walked along the paved garden road and he could not help but agree with them.

= We should tell Alfonse at the very least father. This is going to come bite our butt…rear in the future! Mark my words. I do not believe Hel will stay with arms crossed or that her followers were all defeated. You know it as well as I do. If they come at a point when Alfonse is in a vulnerable position it will be a disaster father!Whatever Henriette will come to talk about tonight regarding Oly should be known to him as well.== Bel had said.

-Alfonse This morning when I arrived at the infirmary to accompany cousin Bel to breakfast I noticed the maid had left the door open and…I accidentally overheard something. I am not one to overheard conversations but as I was leaving I heard cousin Bel arguing very passionately with uncle Andreas about something that may concern Oly and the others may not want you to know. I confess I was rooted to the spot and could not move for the impression of her words.

-What was it?

- I do not know and neither do they. What I heard was that tonight there will be a meeting in the small office in the Library. The one near the secret study, they found not long ago. Your parents will come to talk about something they know about, that will help the efforts to rescue Oly. Cousin Bel wants you to know but uncle Andreas said he was sure your parents would not want you to know. I may be wrong for telling you this, but I am of the same opinion as cousin Bel and think you are responsible enough to know whatever secret they have to share. I know no more but that piece of information I heard…I …could not stay and hear more as you can understand. As soon as I recovered my wits I left.

-I see. They came all the way from the capital…It must be very important. When will this take place?

-At midnight, When you and Sharena are sure to be asleep.

- We better go to bed early then.-Alfonse said and proceeded to plan their move.

[Line break]

-Alfonse…I should not be here. - Zacharias said quietly behind Alfonse who slowly walked through a darkened tunnel guided by a dim crystal lamp. Said tunnel had started in the garden and it was damp and mouldy. It branched a couple of times in different directions some downwards and some upwards. It was just big enough for three persons at start but now that the tunnel had branched upwards the walls looked dry and dusty and big enough for just one big person to fit. Zacharias had seen various places where the wall had some designs carved unto them and some of them looked like they could move but had not been used in a long time.- Where is this place? Inside the castle?- He whispered afraid of the amplified sound.

-Don’t worry. No one will hear you here.- Alfonse said.

==That is not reassuring in the least.== Thought Zacharias. Bruno as Zacharias had adopted a way of talking more informal so as to seem more like a person that had grown in the country and it made him feel more freedom to express himself.

- These tunnels run along some of the wall of the castle and were designed to be sound proof by my ancestor to be a escape route in case of invasion. Except the tunnel collapsed long ago before going far enough to be safely outside the castle. That is why we could not have used it during the Emblan attack …but mostly they have been forgotten by everyone and this makes them secure enough to navigate.

-Wait no one knows about these? How did you find them out?

-I..- Alfonse paused.- I found an old map in the secret library. The day they found us I think. As soon as I could, I came to investigate.

-By yourself? When?

-The days before and after the funeral. Everyone has been too busy to notice I was not practising violin.

-Now I understand why cousin Bel is always checking up on you…- Zacharias said between his teeth and a little grumpily. He was starting to understand why his parents may not want him to know something that may peek his curiosity. Alfonse seemed a little too adventurous for a prince. In a way almost careless. - What if you had gotten yourself lost?

-I had my map.

-What if there was another collapse?

-Unlikely. The collapsed part of the tunnel was built in a less sturdy kind of rock and probably collapsed due to corrosion of the wooden pillars or some other cause.

-But Alfonse… still! You could have run into something …dangerous like a…- Zacharias started but stopped when he heard a quiet laugh.

- You sound like cousin Bel.- Alfonse said looking back at the teen with sparking eyes.

-She is rubbing off on me is she not?- Zacharias said smiling fondly.

-She worries…but it is understandable…- Alfonse started and went quiet.- Here. We are almost there…mm…behind this panel.- He added and clicked on an ornamental carving in the middle. There was a pop and a grumble and a piece of the wall opened to reveal wooden paneling and a mechanism to open a door. On it there was a smaller one that looked like a peeping hole but big enough to put a hand through. When Alfonse opened it, they found it was blocked by a material that looked like canvas but was actually see through. - They are not here yet.

-We better keep quiet just in case they can her us now.- Said Zacharias sitting himself on the floor next to the dim lamp, while Alfonse kept watch. He took this moment to think about how he was going to tell Alfonse who he really was and what he was doing here in Askr and explain to him that his feelings for him and his sister were sincere despite the falseness of his meeting. He wanted Alfonse to know everything about him and never lie to him ever again. He felt like a hypocrite sitting here on the floor while Alfonse was confiding in him such secrets.

Zacharias was lost in thought when he heard voices coming from the other side of the wall. He reincorporated himself to stand by Alfonse who scooted away to give him room to see inside.

The first one to enter the parlour was Henriette followed by Bel and Adrien. Behind them walked Gustav. The man looked grim and pale and was holding his left side as if he was in pain but as soon as Henriette turned around he composed himself and let go of it and closed the door. When he turned around he looked stern and cold as if he had never felt pain. Zacharias saw this and noticed Alfonse had not because he was busy inspecting the canvas-like material.

The group in the parlour exchanged some pleasantries as Gustav had been busy and had not been able to meet with Bel and Adrien to discus the situation. This had angered Alfonse who thought his father was starting to act like his late grandfather and perceived Oly’s disappearance as a lesser problem. In truth Gustav was afraid to face the two. Shame was still fresh inside his heart and although he had felt the loss as much as everyone else he felt himself responsible for not being able to do much and felt he had failed his cousin once again.

-Bel. Adrien. We have called you here to offer our help. Henriette has told me Oly has been sent to The World Of Steel. Although I could never fathom the depth of your loss I want to reassure you both that I feel it as well in my heart. My dear cousin did not need to tell me to look after you for me to take a vow of responsibility and I have failed him once again.- Gustav said gravely and Alfonse’s mouth opened a little by surprise.- I am sorry.

-It wasn’t your fault Gustav. But I know how you feel. He…asked me to protect her and I could not…I was the one who failed him and the children…The only thing I have left is to search for a way to get to her…and care for the baby inside me. Father says he can’t open a portal to the world of Steel because it has never been done by anyone before.

-That is correct. No living human can open a portal to that world. It is forbidden and impossible for us who can open portals. However there is a way.- Gustav said, then added.- But I must have your word that this information will not leave this room.

-A way?- Asks Adrien with furrowed brows.

-Yes Adrien. A way not even you know about. A way that is forbidden for anyone else to use …Indeed it is forbidden under penalty of death to know about… Only the direct heir of the King and their spouse shall know along with the Guardians of the Way. The sentinels.- Gustav paused and then added.- Given the unique situation of our family and the promise I made to myself and my cousin to care for you; I will share this information. Bel you are as of now a heir to the throne via Alfonse.

-Gustav!- Henriette said and covered her mouth.

Zacharias had read the report about Bel and prince Alfonse. He knew just like Adrien and the late general that the Hel cult believed the two to be soulmates; so hearing this he understood what the King meant. He also Knew Alfonse and Bel themselves did not know this. He looked sideways at his friend and saw surprise on his face but knew it was at the title being given to her.

-And you Adrien as her father.- He added without looking at Henriette. Bel looked confused and Adrien looked angry. Zacharias knew the general knew what Gustav meant but as much as both of them hated it, they needed the help now. He also knew that the older man was just not ready to tell Bell the truth. He also knew Bel would be furious with the idea of becoming the young prince’s wife.

- I don’t understand. Is it because Alfonse and Adrian can open portals like the heirs of Líf?- Bel asked clearly confusing “Alfonse” for her husband. Gustav looked surprised at her. He looked reluctant to speak and Zacharias wondered if Gustav had planned on telling her the truth at that moment.

-Yes dear. Generations ago twins were born and both of them had the gift.- She said quickly, seeing the blessed way out. Gustav turned then to his wife, anger in his eyes, but said nothing. This proved to Zacharias that his theory was right. The King wanted Bel to know the truth but was thwarted by the Queen.

-Our family had the same right to the throne as the first born twin’s, but the the law was written so that when twins are born; the first born would be regent. To dissuade any risen conflict the second born twin acquires the title of Guardian of the Crown and thus his claim to the crown is forfeited and passed as a auxiliary regent in case of emergencies or death of the Original line. Which we are in charge of defending. This is the reason every single member of our family has had military training and is considered the Royal bodyguards. It is a great honor to us.

==So the part about the twins was truth. Seems a better system than the Emblan one.== The thought of making this into a law in the empire was but a quick passing one against all the information he was privy to.

-Oh! I see. No one better to def fend the original line than the brother bound to serve the crown by honor and family pride. That way there is no backstabbings.

- Bluntly put but correct.- Said Gustav nodding.- And now your line will be given our most guarded secret. I hope you are aware of the amount of trust we are bestowing upon you.

-I will guard the secret with my life as you well know it.

- I completely understand Gustav. Askr is my home and I love its people. I will keep the secret with my life.

Zacharias backed away from the peeping hole stunned by the sudden realization of his situation. He felt guilty about being here, privy to secrets not meant to be heard by other people. And under penalty of death. His position in the line of the Emblan throne would not help his situation but make it worse still for himself. He would be branded as a spy and taken into custody and put in jail. His sister would be left unprotected and made a puppet to the other nobles. He would loose the trust and friendship of the people that he had come to love as his family; and what was worst is that his imprisonment would be used to start the war even when the nobles hated him.

- I should not be here…- He whispered. He tried walking away but was held up by Alfonse’s hand.

-You will get lost.

-We should go Alfonse.

-Shh…They will hear us!- Alfonse said and turned back to the hole. Zacharias backed away to the edge of the light , sat down and as he was about to put his hands on his ears he heard it.

- …it is imperative Bel that the Emblan prince does not acquire this knowledge… Or Alfonse. He may be your…- Gustav paused when Henriette placed a hand on his arm.-…friend but he is too young and too adventurous to know right now. He will know when he comes of age or when the need arises to make use of it. Which I hope it’s never. - The stern voice of the now King said with an edge to it. Zacharias’ eyes widen with fear and surprise. Of course he was the least person they wanted to inform. It was obvious, but that was not what he was afraid of. He was afraid they would say who he was and he had to explain to Alfonse now that he had heard such a thing. How would he explain to Alfonse? His friend would never believe anything he said anymore and it would looked now like he had used Alfonse to get to hear this information. He knew how it looked like now. He sat on the floor as far away from the “window”as he could,waiting for Alfonse to confront him about it, while inside the room the secret he was not supposed to hear was told. He covered his ears and closed his eyes hoping for the best.

-What do you mean two portals to the World of Steel? I thought it was impossible?

-Not impossible. Forbidden. Let me explain. Back in the time of the First King Líf when our ancestor had just been crowned King by his people. Lord Askr himself walked the land and they were friends. This was the time Lord Askr himself gave his most beloved of friends the way to defend this land and the people he loved so much. He gave the now King the sacred weapon Breidablik. With the sacred weapon Lord Askr himself reached to another world and called the person who would become new guardian of the land. That person would be the only one to be able to wield the sacred weapon and call an army of heroes to defend the new kingdom. She was the first Summoner of Askr.

-Like me.

-Yes. And like you this person came from a world not tied in fate to ours. It is said that the World of Steel guards the lore and secrets of the Gods and so it is forbidden to go there. Those worlds we can open portals to are the worlds tied in fate to us. Lord Askr then opened two ways to her world so that she may come and go if she so pleased. He asked of us to guard them and to never open another portal to this world. We guard the portal we know about. The other has been lost for a long time. The new capital was build with the thought of guarding what used to be the Northern Sanctuary of the Way. The portal is next to the throne room…and not one person knows it is there.

-So that is why the capital was moved?- Asked Adrien.

-It was attacked centuries ago by Embla. They thought we guarded the sacred weapon there.

-I see…Wait…if no one of you can open the way to the World of Steel why was Deana able to open the portal there?

- According to our research. The World of Steel can only be reached by one who has already been there or by Lord Askr himself. The reason we are not permitted to go or to open portals to that world any more is of course because every portal opened is a liability to your world since we can not close them and we can not guard them all. This is the reason I have never gone, but it seems Deana went inside herself in secret. Which must have been a very difficult task given the magic and human guards in place. We are still investigating her intentions and Deana was not an adventurous woman. As my bast…-Gustav paused and closed his eyes; then proceeded.- As my half sister I suppose it was out of curiosity rather than actual malicious intent.

-I wholeheartedly agree.- Adds Henriette placing a hand gently over Gustav’s arm. Alfonse paid no attention to that part. He was too stunned to do so. Deana was his aunt and they had never told them. He thought it was so like his grandfather to hide such a thing and thank Lord Askr that he had had the chance to know her. She had always been kind and loving to them and now he knew why.

- So if father goes once, he can open portals there after, but is forbidden to do so?

- Correct. But Bel there is no need for more portals to be open either way. There is a post in the World of Steel. The Guardians of the Way take turns to live there and they report to us, but of course they do not divulge any of this information to anyone else. They will be the ones to search for Oly but you are welcome to go as well as you Adrien. Just remember. I advise that you let them search first. If they are not successful and you are safe to travel then you can join them. I tell you Bel not only because you are the mother but because unlike Adrien you are in a better position to navigate the world and their technology.- Bel nodded at this. Adrien did not like it but he agreed as well. He was not fit for that job and he was needed here in case of another attack.- I warn you. At the beginning we were told to guard the way to protect your world, of our magic, but now…

-I understand.

-So now you understand why we do not want Alfonse to know about this or for more portals leading there to be open?

-Damn Gustav! If you have heard half the stuff I know about our world you would know I never in all my life would let Alfonse step on the World of Steel! Or anyone there to know about Askr…Magic and all…You would not last long…

-So I have heard.- He nodded solemnly.

In the tunnel Alfonse was no longer listening. He backed away and looked down to Zacharias in horror. Watching his now friend sitting on the floor, eyes closed and hands on his ears Alfonse felt a wave of relief wash over him. For a moment he was afraid for him. He knew that if it was known that they had heard the conversation he would surely be in trouble but Zacharias would not run with the same luck. Alfonse carefully closed the window and then the mechanism in the wall. All along Zacharias did not move. Once Alfonse knew they were safe he approached his friend and touched his arm to get his attention hoping he did not look as scared as he felt.

Zacharias’ eyes widen in surprise at the gentle touch.He looked up at Alfonse with trepidation but did not see anger in the boy’s eyes, only fear.

-Alfonse…- He started but pause to make sure it was safe for them to talk.- I should not have been here!

-We should not have…but it is done. At least you did not hear the rest…

-Nor do I want to know.Alfonse. Look at me.- Zacharias said and took Alfonse’s shoulder in his hands to look him in the eyes.- No matter what happens to me. I swear to you no one will know what I know. I vow to you that I will not only take this information to my grave but I will do whatever I can to keep you and Sharena safe from anyone, including myself. You have my word.

-Zacharias…I…I thank you…I swear no one will know you heard it. You have my word. As long as I live you will be safe I pro..- Alfonse started but was cut short by Zacharias.

-NO.- Zacharias said firmly and sternly.- You can not promise me this Alfonse.

-But…

-I thank the sentiment, but you are now a prince. Promise me that if it comes to choosing your people, Sharena, you or I… You will choose always you and your people. Promise me.

-I…I promise you.

[Line break]

Days pass and Alfonse can see the strain Bel is in with the pregnancy, and the weight of the search she can not talk about. It breaks his heard to see her try to be as normal as she could to make their lives happy. He knew she was wearing a mask mostly around Sharena who was younger and had had resented the loss of her favorite playmate. He still had not analyze his own loss. He could not. Every time he tried to let himself mourn her loss the image of his grandfather saying he was too weak to be his heir came to his mind. But mostly he could not bear the pain he felt every time he remembered her and the thought of never seeing her again came to his mind.

Zacharias’s presence helped him a lot even when Alfonse could see the teen had burdens himself. Alfonse did not want to bother his friends with questionings as he was afraid he could lose his friendship and tried to let him come and talk to him on his own time. Still he wondered at his sadness and the way he had clung to Sharena and himself as if they had been a salvation to the older teen. He could sense the same kind of loneliness he himself had grown up with. This made him appreciate Sharena’s presence in his life even more.

Every day since Sharena could exercise they would train with Zacharias under the watchful eye of his cousin and her two retainers Aleen and Feraht. They were constantly visited by one of the guards. A man he had heard Bel call Gudrum. Lord Andreas would come often and stay a few days. Alfonse had grown to love him and rely on him as much as he had done his cousin Alfonse.

Around that time Alfonse had noted something strange with all of the people. He had ran into some of the guards and some of the servants talking in hushed voices about something they were too afraid to voice. He started paying more attention and learned it had something to do with the attack on the manor. He went to ask one of the servants once about it and the servant had blessed herself and refused to talk no matter his coaxing. By this time Bel’s pregnancy has four months along and her belly already swollen. She had made plans to ‘visit’ his parents for some days but a messenger had come for her and she had stayed. When Lord Andreas came back Alfonse was ready to investigate what was happening with the search.

He was watching Sharena train with their friend when the servant had come to tell cousin Bel her father had arrived and wanted to talk to her. Alfonse and Zacharias shared a knowing look. Zacharias sent him an almost pleading look but Alfonse just excused himself and left.

- Excuse me. I forgot I needed to practice violin today.- And he left. Zacharias watched him go with a worried expression. He did not like one bit for the child to go into the labyrinth of corridors by himself but he also could not accompany him. If something happened he did not even have a map to search for him.

Alfonse navigated the corridors as quickly as he could until he reached the one that reached his cousin’s room. This time the door to the room had no peeping hole and he had to strain his ears to hear. Knowing the door opened to the hidden walk in closet , he opened the door carefully to enter the closet. Carefully he maneuvered the parcels on the floor. They were new items his cousin had been acquiring for the baby. This door did have a keyhole but it was always left unlocked so if he wanted to open it he could. There was no need; he could listen and see perfectly.

-So there is no new clues… I am afraid for him…-Bel said with a worried expression. They had been talking about Alfonse and Sharena’s memory loss and how it would affect their safety.

-So am I daughter; but this is why we need to stand by him.- Adrien answered. Alfonse assumed they were talking about his father.

-I had news from the capitol. A letter. The lockdown is still in effect but as you know they were going to have means to access the internet. They bought one of the computers I told you about and a connection for my phone. They told me I have to stay put until they quarantine themselves for at least a moth. I can wait. I do not want the sickness to spread. The guardians do not even want to approach the gate father.

-Is it really that bad daughter?

-I do not have the whole information, but what may not be that bad there, may as well be lethal here. Last time we had a pandemic this big; around one third to one half of the population died.

- That is horrendous. I am afraid for you daughter. Do not go.

-Don’t worry I would not go if I did not think it would be safe. After the quarantine It will be safe for me to go and research from the post. I would not need to go out into the world. The actual post is a large portion of land. A closed off Hamlet of people that live without any sort of outside technology or help. But they really are just a port. The actual family owns a businesses that makes them quite wealthy and powerful in the small city they live in. They utilize their power to keep the secret of the Kingdom. They will provide the technology needed and the detectives who will look for Oly. But I need to be there since they do not want to send a technician to the actual post because of the disease. I will be able to teach the guardians how to use technologies that will help them be independent in this trying time. They could use at least my knowledge for their gain.

-I see. Then I will support you on this task. Still I urge you to be careful.

-Of course father. For me and for Askr.

[Line break ]

Alfonse kept watch of the situation and said nothing to anyone. Zacharias had asked him not to share any of the information. Alfonse needed his point of view but understood that Zacharias would be in more trouble if he shared details even if he did not share the important parts. So he watched alone with a knot in his stomach every time he thought Bel would leave. And leave she did. When she has around five months pregnant she departed for the capitol for “some days” to be checked out by the royal healers. Or at least that was what she had been told to say to them. Alfonse saw the pain it caused her to eave them but he knew the pain she was in without her child. Oly was dear to him and so he understood and wished her luck from afar.

The days turned into months. They were told there were complications with her pregnancy and that was the reason she had not come back.During this time Zacharias became their most trusted and beloved friend. Sharena learned fast her lancing lessons and Alfonse was happy to see how strong she was becoming. Zacharias was a great teacher and would help him with his own sword training. Bel came back after some time and Zacharias offered to teach her how to use a grimoire which she agreed to. By now she was almost eight months along.

Alfonse still remember the conversations he had heard when she had come back. As usual he had snuck into her closet to listen to the update.

-…and it took some time because the government offices are mostly closed; but we found the car the plaques belong to and the country it was located. From then on it was more difficult. The difference in language took us time. It was a different country and laws so searching for news became a slow process. I made friends from afar with the detective in charge of the case and we are paying him to search for Oly, but without giving him all the details of course. I am sure he will find her eventually.

-That is good news daughter. How is the situation with the pandemic?

-Not good father. There are so many people in the hospitals that I pray I will not need a surgery for the birth.- Bel’s words became gloomy and Alfonse worried about what this disease may do to Oly herself. If it was that bad would Oly be strong enough to survive it? He did not need to voice his worry.

-Daughter…would Oly be strong enough…

-He has your blood father. She is strong enough. Besides this disease seems to be worse on older people and people that are already sick. I am worried of course but…I am sure things will be alright.

[line break]

The news Bel had brought had given Alfonse hope and she even looked happier. They made good of the time before the birth of the new baby. Sharena had wanted to help Bel knit the baby a blanket and her enthusiasm had driven the other two to try the task themselves. Alfonse saw with pride that he had done the best effort of the three.

- I suppose the violin practices helped me with the finger dexterity. - Commented Alfonse looking at the square of yarn he had knitted. He scowls when he hears his friend Zacharias scoff.

-Those violin practices have helped you a lot in many ways friend.- The older teen says smiling at his younger friend. Alfonse takes the hint and blushes a little. After all he regularly disappeared to “practice violin” to hear any news on Oly.

- I wish they would help him put away his dirty socks.- Pipes in Sharena pinching her nose and laughing. Alfonse turned beet red.

-It was one time and it was because I was in a hurry…- Says Alfonse pouting. Zacharias laughs loudly.

-Aww don’t bully my baby boy. He is a very tidy guy. Right Ponchito?- Says Bel trying to pinch his check and failing because he moved away just in time and she was to big to lean closer t him. Alfonse “hated” being called Baby Boy by her and having his cheeks inched even more.- You did do a great work Alfonse. If you make it bigger I will add it to the blanket.- She winks at his blush.

- If I make it better Will you add mine as well cousin?- Ask Sharena whose work resembled a spider web.

- Of course. And yours too Zach!- Zacharias work was better but he had missed a couple of stitches and had four holes in it.- Come on we better get to work. This child wants to get out soon. -Bel helped Sharena with her work and at the end she did added the three parts to her blanket.

Days later she went into labor.

-Are you sure she is alright?- Asked Zacharias. He was not much for understanding how childbirth worked outside of books and he thought that since it was a painful endeavor Bel would be practically screaming. Instead he only heard whimpers. His heart constricted when they heard her call out to her husband once. Alfonse looked very worried too.

- The healers and midwife are doing their best. I am sure she will be alright.- Said Adrien but his face was grave and his eyes red. They were in the parlour adjacent to Bel’s bedroom around the fireplace where a table with now cold tea was served of the finest china. Zacharias was sitting on a love sit with Sharena by his side while Alfonse and Adrien sat on separate chairs. Aleen and Feraht were standing by the window by themselves since Bertha and Gertrude were assisting the healers.. The door opened an a healer came out. All of them turned to her.

- She is doing fine.- The healer said to the worried people.- It is unusual for us to request this but the Lady has asked for her father to be present….she needs the emotional support. I agree with her sentiment.

-Of course! I will gladly enter.- Adrien says and his face betrays the torrent of emotions he was feeling. He takes a deeper breath and follows the healer.

-Can I come too?- They hear. It was Alfonse with a determined face. Adrien looks at him with an unreadable expression on his face.

-Let him in. I will watch Sharena.- Comments Zacharias and his gaze reflects his emotions on the matter. Adrien nods at last and both of them disappear inside the room. Zacharias was ready to suggest Alfonse to go practice violin if the man had not agreed.

Inside Bel was counting her breathing. Her face lit up when she saw the two of them come in. The healers told the both of them to stay at each side of the “birthing chair” the way Bel suggested. Alfonse was fascinated by the “chair ” it was a new design Bel and her midwife had perfected when Oly was about to be born. The chair was leaning enough to support her weight but straight enough to be almost standing to let gravity do her job. There were legs and arms supports and handles for her to grab each time she had to push. There were also levers on the side to lean it back the same way the gynecologist chairs worked for the midwives and healers to check the patients.

Bel was bleeding too much in Alfonse opinion. He also saw concern on the midwife’s brow. His uncle looked white as a sheet and he knew he looked the same. In fact he felt like he was about to faint at some moments and found that Bel would take moments between contraptions to take his hand and reassure him. This realization shamed him and he then remember that Bel had said that during labor she had to remember to breath correctly and had told them how it was done. So he started to count between contraptions and help her breathe right. After this Bel even smiled between contractions.

The boy was born and shown to Bel, then it was taken to be cleaned. The baby kept crying during all the ordeal, while Bel was checked up. This was their cue to leave.

-She was bleeding quite a lot.-Says Alfonse quietly to Adrien. Sharena is now fast asleep on the love-sit. Zacharias had been pacing around the room but stopped when he heard the baby cry.- Is it normal?

- No…- The man looked about to crumble. In that moment he looked not like the great Lord Alfonse had always known and Alfonse imagine he had been once when his own wife had died at childbirth. He was about to say something else when the midwife came out again.

-Is she alright?-

-Although we were able to stop the bleeding, she is still very weak. We are keeping her awake…She bled too much. Much more than it was expected.

-Does she need a blood transfusion?- Asks the Lord. Blood transfusions were not unknown in Askr but were rarely used and only on very carefully monitored conditions, since blood types were still not completely understood. On this occasion it was an easier and safer option since the royal bloodline was known to have the same type of blood. What Bel came to understand as O-. It was her same blood type.

-We can use the blood replenishing potions but it is my opinion that she will recover faster with a blood transfusion.

-I can be a donor too. - Says Alfonse standing strait.

-I do not think it wise, to donate at your age Alfonse. Let me do it. I share the same kid of blood.- Says Adrien.

- I promised Oly I would protect her mother and I will. Donating a liter of blood will not harm me. I will donate.- Says Alfonse respectfully still but firmly.

-You are certainly the right weight if I remember correctly.- Says the healer looking Alfonse from head to toe. Then she turned to Adrien.- Worry not. I do not require so much blood and with the both of you as donors it will be easier for the both of you. Adrien nodded and they both left.

As the process was done Adrien could not help but analyze the interaction between Bel and Alfonse. They were close and after this he felt they would grow closer still. Yet he could find nothing but the interaction he had always seen. That of an older sister to a younger sibling or even a maternal one to her child. The same way he had always know Bel felt. At this he felt like a great weight lift from his shoulders, but at the same time it saddened him. What would happen once Alfonse came of age and his parents told them the truth?

The man stopped his musings to listen to his daughter sing a song he had often heard her sing to his son.

- All I ever needed was the one. Like freedom fields where wild horses run. Where stars collide, like you and I. No shadows block the sun… You’re I ever needed, baby you’re the one.- She sand and the man saw she was trying not to cry. At the end of the song Alfonse looked at her and said he had liked that song a lot.

-Remember it well then. Some day you will meet that one heart that will be your one. You may want to sing it to her.

-I…I don’t think I…who is that Cain the song talks about?- He asks avoiding the topic. Bel smiles.

-That is a tale for another day…

[Line break]

- What do you mean you are taking Adri with you?- Asked Zacharias. Bel sat down next to him. The child in her bosom was sitting comfortably on a baby carrier she had used on Oly as well. It had been around seven months since she had given birth to little Adrien. Zacharias was the first to call him Adri and he had become very dear to the 15 year old.

-Don’t worry. We will be back before your birthday.

-That is still months away.- Says Alfonse furrowing his brows. He had to feign surprise at her news. He of course had listened to her talking to uncle Adrien about the new development on the search for Oly. She was going in case the lead proved true and they find the missing girl. Alfonse was ecstatic but he also did not want her to go. Yes he had a mother, but Bel was the closest he had ever felt as one in normal life sense of the word. She was his older sister and confidant. Even after the birth of little Adrien, her treatment and their relationship had not changed.

-I said before his birthday Ponchito.

-I don’t want you to go.- Says Sharena and she pouts.

-Honey. I will be back. I promise you guys. Come here my little chipmunk. Don’t give me that face. Look…I need to go because it is very important. I do not know how to tell you this…but I swear I would not go if it was not important. Someone has news of Oly and …

-Oly? Is she alright? Is she coming back?- Sharena asked eagerly. Sharena did not know Oly had been sent to the World of Steel of course so she thought she was somewhere in Askr but lost. She often feared Deana had kidnapped her . Once she had voiced this to Alfonse and he had said to her that Deana had always been a good person to them and did not believe her to have done something so awful. Sharena of course never took into account why Deana had been able to open a portal as she was not old enough to know or understand.

-We don’t know yet honey. The people searching for her just have a lead. It means they think someone has seen her and we need to go and see if it is her or not.

-Oh…I miss her.

-So do I honey…

[Line break]

-What do you mean they disappeared?

-I am so sorry Adrien. We have no idea what happened. They are going to inform the authorities. They let us know as soon as they discovered the two were not in their room and searched the whole property.- Alfonse heard his uncle’s strangled cry. He himself was shocked to the spot. He looked on as his mother was trying hard not to succumb to tears as well. She had come from the capital mere hours ago. As soon as he had heard she was back he knew she had come to talk to uncle Adrien so he readied himself to listen to their conversation as soon as his uncle came back from the fields where he was overseeing a military operation. Zacharias had helped him distract Sharena and their instructor so he would go investigate.

-Were they taken?

-The room was locked from the inside and no one was seen on the property. It’s like they just banished…I…

That was all Alfonse was able to hear. He sat down on the dusty floor. He did not even register the cold of it’s stone surface. He buried his face in his hands and felt himself tremble with the force of holding back the sobs that were threatening to come out.

==They will come back…She promised…She can’t leave us alone…She will come back…I will look for them and I will find them…==

-I do not know how we are going to tell the children…How am I going to tell Alfonse…- He heard Henriette say among her tears.

At that moment Alfonse decided it was time to grow up and return to the capital to train. It was time he took responsibility as the prince that he was. Perhaps then he would be able to hear something about them and in time demand to be sent to find them.

[ Line break]

Years later he heard about the renovation of the castle in the northern city and the Order of Heroes. The Emblan empire had finally declared open war against Askr and the Royal Army needed the extra help.

He had not had any leads about his cousins and he had lost hope so he talked to Zacharias about joining the Order and to his surprise Zacharias had agreed. Even Sharena had agreed to join. Their father of course had objected but being as Gustav had almost entirely divorced himself from his kids Alfonse decided to discard his order and join. At this show of blatant disobedience Gustav was in the verge of disowning Alfonse. If it wasn’t for Henriette’s and Adrien’s pleas for Gustav to think better of the situation it would have come to pass. Gustav then let Alfonse go but retreated his society and asked to not be called father by the teen.

Alfonse had no problem with this after Gustav’s blatant abandonment.

Then Zacharias was lost in one of the Order’s missions and was never found again. His heart broke in what he felt was an unfixable million pieces. He decided loving people was too painful and they always left him. He had only Sharena in his life and he was going to make sure she was safe. He did not need anyone in his heart and no one else would get close to him and hurt him anymore.

[Line break]

-Brother!! Commander Anna has gone to perform the ritual!

-What? Alone?- Alfonse said visibly annoyed. He had jus arrived from a mission to find this problem and a problem he was sure this would turn into.

-She took a small platoon but you know Embla may attack any time.Alfonse you have to go! Take the squad I will get there later when the men get ready in case you have trouble. I hope I can get to see the summoning.- She said excitedly.

-I will. The Commander should have waited for our return. - Alfonse sighted as he took his sword and shield that he had just discarded again and left his room.- Be careful Sharena.- He said to his sister and left. What if the Summoner turned out to be his cousin? After all she had been summoned before. He did not dare hope but he still felt elated.

Alfonse ran as fast as he could as soon as he heard the tale tell sounds of a skirmish ahead. His people following close behind.

-Lord Takumi! Behind you!-He heard the Commander shout.-The Summoner! Protect the Summoner!

Alfonse arrived in time to see the Commander’s men trying and failing to keep Emblan soldiers away from two figures that were surrounded by enemies. One of them was a lean man with long silver hair who very efficiently felled soldier by soldier that got close enough to try to take them on. The other was a figure clad in a what looked to be a white coat that went in tune with the Order’s uniform. He ran towards them and ordered his men to follow. He saw in slow motion as one of the enemy soldiers got past the archer’s guard and tried to strike the smaller figure. Surprised by the unseen attack the figure tried to get out of the way and use the weapon on their hands at the same time, which caused them to fall backwards. He was all this while fighting his way into the circle the two figures were standing in.

When the enemy struck again Alfonse was there to block the blow and parry of the attacker. He made quick work of the soldier and seeing as his men were blocking the rest of the attackers off he turned to the fallen figure of who he now understood to be their new Summoner.

The person looked disoriented by the fall but more than than that he paid no attention tho them. He offered his hand in help and the other took it and stood up. Alfonse made sure they stayed between who he supposed was Lord Takumi and himself as protection.

-Grazie! Questa cosa può sparare come una pistola vera?- He heard a voice say behind him. It was a sweet melodious voice that took him by surprise. He could hardly understand what they meant but it sounded a bit like the ancient tongue to him. He looked back and was met with a beautiful mouth set in a very determined look. - I mean. Do this gun shoot like a normal gun?

-It should.- He said a little at a loss for words. As soon as he said this the girl with the oversized hood started to shoot at the soldiers carefully avoiding the Askran men.

[Line break]

- I am prince Alfonse of Askr. It is a honor to finally meet the Hero of legends and you Prince Takumi of Hoshido. I thank you for your agreeing to help us in our hour of need.- Alfonse said to the two people he stood next to. He had remembered reading about the prince of Hoshido not long ago, but the other person was still a mystery to him. He could not even see her face from the hood of the Summoner coat she was wearing. Now that he was able to see her he saw the coat was indeed too big for her lithe body and short stature. The Commander had ordered it made in a big size thinking the great hero was a big man.

- The honor is mine. I will do my best to help your kingdom. Upon my honor I swear this.- Prince Takumi answered shaking Alfonse’s hand. He then looked down to the Summoner who expended her hand in to take Alfonse’s own. The hand was small and delicate as dark in color as Zacharias’ and as soft as and warm as the memory of Sharena’s before she took up her lance lessons.

-Mmm I will do my best to protect your people Prince Alfonse of Askr. My name is Emma.

Notes:

I always wondered about how life in Askr was with Zacharias and how they met. After all Bruno was already a teen when he arrived as he left a girlfriend behind. I am sure Alfonse and Sharena looked up to him but Especially Alfonse since they are both males and Alfonse got to feel like he did not have to be the protector to Sharena as much and feel like he was protected in a way. No wonder the loss of Zacharias hurt him so much. He was the older brother he never had. It seemed to me that the empress of Embla has had more than one husband by what they say about her and Veronica's was the latest she had since there has been no talk about a new emperor.

[parentingwild]

This is my beautiful little family and this is just a slice of what our journey has been like.. Part 2 (Not a fully detailed version)

WARNING THIS CAN BE TRIGGERING!

After shift change in the morning her numbers kept dropping on the monitor. When the nurse examined me she discovered the cord around my daughter's neck. She grabbed the OBGYN and he examined me himself. He told us that we could give birth naturally but she could be severely injured or die in the process. He told us our second option was an emergency c-section. I was then rolled into the operating room and put to sleep. After my daughter's birth they pulled her father into a room where they were attempting to resuscitate her. After 3 doses of epi and the breathing tube being just small enough, she was revived. She weighed one pound 2 ounces and was the smallest baby we had both ever seen. She spent 162 days in the NICU which was accompanied by an infection that almost took her from us. During her stay we found out we were pregnant with our second child. We were told before the pregnancy that having a successful one after such an early birth would be dangerous and almost impossible. Once we found out I was scheduled to get stitches placed in my cervix at 12 weeks of pregnancy. I went to 6 appointments a month, 4 specialty and 2 OBGYN. At every specialty appointment we did an ultrasound that checked every aspect of my child and would take hundreds of photos and videos to monitor her. I would spend over an hour each time laying on the table being scanned. The whole pregnancy was accompanied with fear. Their father and I tried to not get too excited and honestly were a little disconnected because we knew the chances of her surviving were slim. During this time my first born had over 20 appointments a month. When she finally came home we had an oxygen concentrator, oxygen tanks, an apnea monitor, and a sp02 monitor.  Before our second was born We had her sister home from the NICU for 4 months. She was delivered via c-section at 37 weeks with no complications weighing 5 pounds 6 ounces! Everything seemed fine at first. We went home two days later. However, the day after we were back home my oldest got very sick and her and dad spent almost 2 weeks in the hospital. My youngest was exclusively breastfeeding at first and wouldn't get back to her birth weight and was losing at a concerning rate. She and I spent over 4 weeks during a few stays at the hospital after they came home. They examined her, tested her, made her calorie intake higher, consulted specialists, and tried to fix the problem every time. To this day she still has issues gaining weight. After weeks of no change and severe feeding difficulties she had a gtube placed. After about 3 months she was finally back to her birth weight. We are still in the beginning of our journey and looking for answers or solutions to what is going on with our children. 

When I had my first epidural to place the cerclage. They spent an extensive time trying to place it correctly and I had pain from it instantly. The pain spread and continued to worsen. Before my daughter's birth I had another epidural. They had the same issue and caused more damage. I tried to address it for several months and was told it was normal. It has now progressed to my whole body. I am in the most pain I’ve ever been in. This pain has been constant for months. I have lost a lot of my strength and my body is constantly aching.

[blueorpinkuk]

In today’s blog post, find out the details of both a gender-reveal ultrasound scan and an early gender blood test in the UK.

[procyongaaay]

As someone currently heavily pregnant (34 weeks) with a very much wanted baby... All of this.

Miscarriages are really common. I had 3 early miscarriages before this pregnancy.

It's normal to take a while to get pregnant. So much sex Ed focuses on how not to get pregnant that a lot of people think they're broken if they're trying for a baby for 6 cycles and haven't gotten pregnant yet. Yes there's chances of getting pregnant but it doesn't happen right away. On average it takes a year to successfully conceive if you're in your 20s, 2 years if you're in your 30s, and potentially longer in your 40s, though what kind of shape you're in at that point will likely have more impact than specific age at that point. That's the minimum time you've had to be trying for before they'll start looking for fertility issues most of the time.

I've suspected I've had SPD for a few months but I've had multiple drs hand wave it away as "probably just round ligament pain". Like no I have that too and I know what that feels like it's not the same. I've got a connective tissue disorder that makes things like SPD much more common... And it's not that uncommon to begin with.

And absolutely the thing about being treated like a vessel for the baby is a thing... Like I went into the ER with bad abdominal pain in upper right quadrant and a few other symptoms that were worryingly similar to preeclampsia. They checked on baby and did a urine test and said it's not baby related so you're good to go home. Might be a gall bladder issue or maybe a kidney infection, but it's not going to hurt baby so don't worry about it. Like ok??? If it's gall bladder or kidney related maybe let's look at treating that? Do some blood tests? Anything? Nope. Just sent home with Tylenol and told if it gets bad again go to someone else and get an ultrasound on my gallbladder to see if I have gall stones or the like.

And I've been bugging my dr to get an ultrasound on kiddo for weeks because I'm supposed to have one at week 32, but they didn't want to give me one for literally no reason? Like baby is showing signs he might come early, and we were told that he might be early because he's big (97th percentile at anatomy scan at 24 weeks), but when I brought that up I was told "well a lot can change in 10 weeks, he might not be that big". Ok and? You know how well know? Do the god damn ultrasound. My spouse needs to give work notice if kiddo comes early. They need minimum 2 weeks advance notice to change dates of parental leave. And if kiddo is gonna be early we need to know. So yeah I know there's no guarantee he's gonna be early. But that doesn't mean we don't need to know if he is. My family is predisposed to really big babies. I've had several blood relatives born in the 10-12lb range, and none under 8lbs. Chances are he's gonna be a big baby. Maybe big enough C section may be necessary. And if so *we need to know ahead of time* and it's rediculous that I need to fight them on this. The only reason I was able to convince them to send me in for an ultrasound this time was because I've not done my glucose challenge yet (been too sick to do it mostly) and depending on results of that it can affect baby's growth, so they finally gave in and are giving me the ultrasound. But yeah none of my reasons for wanting an ultrasound matter apparently. V frustrating... And tbh this is the much better dr. I've already switched drs once because my previous dr was a dismissive ass, and these guys are much better, and even they have some issues tbh.

But all that to say. You never realize how much everything is till you experience. Pregnancy is really fucking hard on your body. Birth even more so. But even just pregnancy is exhausting and painful. Like having a flu for 40 weeks plus having a little creature inside you that starts moving and kicking your organs halfway through, then tries to kill you on its way out. Human pregnancy is extremely parasitic even compared to the vast majority of mammals, and the arms race between very parasitic offspring and the parents body's need to survive is why we have lower fertility rates than most animals, and why we menstruate when most mammals don't. Our entire species has been shaped by how hard pregnancy is, but people still pretend it's nothing and easy and a beautiful miracle and that anyone who says otherwise is just ungrateful... It's really rediculous.

And it's still worth it. But it's not something I would ever push on someone against their will. If there's one thing that's cemented my pro-choice stances more than anything else in my life, it's the experience of being pregnant myself. I chose this. I wanted this. I can't wait to meet our son and see what kind of amazing human he's gonna be. But it's not easy. It's not fun. And i can't imagine someone being forced into this when they don't want/can't care for a baby that'd be so incredibly fucked up. I live in a country where thankfully that's not a worry but it's still so utterly fucked up to even think about.

And for the people who try to say shit like "oh well you can always put the baby up for adoption etc"... Imagine if someone was like hey so there's a chance that someone else could maybe live if you crash your car into this wall going 50kph (throw back to that moderate car crash), and oh btw, you now have no choice, you have to crash your car even if the other person is already dead because if you didn't you'd be a murderer and be charged for it. Make it make sense!

the thing is like. i get that it's scary and makes people who do desire to get pregnant uncomfortable when we talk about the brutality and violence of pregnancy and the damage that pregnancy can do to your body

but you deserve to give informed consent to that process.

the lies around pregnancy - that it's inherently safe, that it doesn't do you permanent damage, that it's only extremely rare for people to die of pregnancy complications, etc like

all of these are lies constructed so that more people will get pregnant w/o knowing all that

there needs to be more talk about the impact of miscarriages and how common they are, how different abortion processes are and how accessible they are

but also like. talking about how pregnancy fucks your body up should not be taboo

this is a process that permanently changes most people's bodies, and that's even if the pregnancy doesn't do them like. severe illness or injury

and i just think everybody should have a right to KNOW that

bc to live in a society that intentionally obscures and hides facts about a completely optional and dangerous process does so for a reason, and that reason is based in a very sinister ideology that does not value bodily autonomy or informed consent

[repro456]

The Importance of Early Pregnancy Scans and Ultrasounds in Ireland

Pregnancy is a life-changing journey, and early scans provide crucial insights into the health and progress of both mother and baby. These scans offer reassurance to parents and ensure proper medical attention during the initial stages of pregnancy. This guide discusses the role of early pregnancy scans and their availability in Ireland.

Why You Need an Early Pregnancy Scan

An early pregnancy scan, typically conducted between 6 and 12 weeks, is essential for confirming the pregnancy and determining its gestational age. It also helps in detecting multiple pregnancies and monitoring the baby’s heartbeat. Scheduling an early pregnancy scan is a vital step for parents seeking clarity and reassurance in the early stages of pregnancy.

Ultrasound Services in Ireland

Ultrasound scans are widely available across Ireland, offering high-quality imaging services for pregnant women. These scans provide detailed visuals of the developing baby and ensure the pregnancy is progressing healthily. Explore the advanced services available through ultrasound Ireland to monitor your baby’s growth with confidence.

The Experience of a Baby Scan

A baby scan is a moment of joy and connection for expecting parents, offering a first glimpse of their growing child. Beyond emotional value, these scans are medically significant for tracking the baby’s development. Learn how a baby scan combines excitement with critical health assessments during pregnancy.

The Value of Maternity Scans

Maternity scans are essential for evaluating the progress of a pregnancy at different stages. These scans can identify potential complications early, ensuring proper medical intervention when needed. Schedule regular maternity scans to stay informed and prioritize your baby’s health throughout your pregnancy.

Early Pregnancy Scans in Dublin

Dublin offers accessible and reliable services for early pregnancy scans, ensuring parents receive the best possible care. These scans confirm the baby’s position, verify gestational age, and provide a clear picture of early development. If you’re in Dublin, consider scheduling an early pregnancy scan Dublin to receive trusted support from expert professionals.

Ultrasound Services in Dublin

Dublin’s ultrasound facilities cater to a variety of prenatal needs, offering state-of-the-art imaging and compassionate care. These services include early pregnancy scans and advanced ultrasounds, giving parents the peace of mind they need. Discover the benefits of scheduling an ultrasound Dublin to ensure your baby’s healthy development.

How to Find a Pregnancy Scan Near Me

Finding a nearby pregnancy scan provider ensures convenience and regular monitoring throughout your pregnancy. Local facilities offer personalized care and timely assessments to track your baby’s progress. Explore how to locate a pregnancy scan near me to maintain confidence in your pregnancy journey.

Early pregnancy scans and ultrasounds are vital tools for ensuring a healthy pregnancy. With accessible services in Ireland and Dublin, parents can take proactive steps to safeguard their baby’s development and health.

[littlestars4dscan]

Pregnancy Scan Derby: Your Guide to Reliable and Affordable Ultrasound Services

Pregnancy is an incredible journey filled with excitement, anticipation, and questions. For expecting parents, ensuring the health and well-being of their baby is a top priority.  Access to high-quality Pregnancy Scan Derby offers peace of mind and a chance to connect with your unborn child. Little Stars 4D Scan, located in Nottingham, provides exceptional ultrasound services to families in Derby and the surrounding areas, offering a unique experience during this special time.

Why Pregnancy Scans Are Important

Pregnancy scans play a crucial role in monitoring the development of the baby and the health of the mother. From confirming the pregnancy to tracking the baby's growth, these scans offer essential insights:

Early Pregnancy Confirmation: The first scan, usually performed between 6 and 12 weeks, confirms the pregnancy, determines the due date, and ensures the baby is developing normally.

Anatomy and Anomaly Checks: Mid-pregnancy scans around 20 weeks assess the baby’s organs and overall development, checking for any abnormalities.

Growth and Well-being Scans: Later scans ensure the baby is growing at a healthy rate and the placenta is functioning properly.

Gender Reveal Options: Many parents opt for scans to discover the gender of their baby, adding to the excitement of preparing for the new arrival.

Bonding with 4D Scans: Advanced technology like 4D scans allows parents to see their baby’s features in remarkable detail, creating a memorable bonding experience.

Little Stars 4D Scan: Serving Derby Families

While based in Nottingham, Little Stars 4D Scan proudly serves families from Derby, providing high-quality, affordable services. The clinic’s experienced team of sonographers and state-of-the-art equipment ensure accuracy, safety, and comfort.

Little Stars 4D Scan specializes in:

Reassurance Scans: Perfect for parents seeking peace of mind during early or later stages of pregnancy.

Gender Determination Scans: Available from 16 weeks onward, these scans use advanced imaging to reveal the baby’s gender with precision.

4D Bonding Scans: Capture detailed images of your baby’s face, movements, and expressions in real time, creating lifelong memories.

Growth Scans: Monitor your baby’s development and well-being throughout the pregnancy journey.

What Makes Little Stars 4D Scan Stand Out?

Affordable Pricing: The clinic offers competitive rates, making it accessible for families seeking reliable ultrasound services.

Friendly Atmosphere: The team creates a welcoming and relaxed environment, ensuring parents feel at ease during their visit.

Advanced Technology: With cutting-edge 4D imaging, Little Stars provides unparalleled views of your baby.

Flexible Appointments: Convenient scheduling options accommodate the needs of busy parents-to-be.

Experienced Professionals: Highly trained sonographers deliver accurate results and expert advice.

Tips for Expecting Parents Booking a Pregnancy Scan

Choose the Right Time: For early reassurance, scans are best between 6 and 12 weeks. For 4D imaging, consider booking between 24 and 32 weeks for optimal clarity.

Stay Hydrated: Drinking water before your scan can improve image quality.

Ask Questions: Don’t hesitate to inquire about the baby’s development, scan procedures, or additional services.

Book Your Pregnancy Scan Near Derby

Little Stars 4D Scan is a trusted provider of pregnancy scans for families in Derby. Whether you’re seeking reassurance, gender determination, or an unforgettable bonding experience through a 4D scan, their expert team is here to support you every step of the way.

[drpoonamgoyal]

Difference Between TVS Scan and Fetal Scan: What You Need to Know

Understanding the purpose of different types of pregnancy-related scans can help expectant parents feel more informed and prepared. Two common types of ultrasounds are the Transvaginal Scan (TVS) and the Fetal Scan, each with unique functions, procedures, and timing. If you’re looking for expert care, Dr. Poonam Goyal, recognized as one of the Best Doctors for Fetal Scan in Delhi and the Best Doctor for TVS Scan in Delhi, provides a thorough understanding of these differences and offers top-quality care. Let’s break down the key distinctions between these two scans.

What is a TVS (Transvaginal Scan)?

A Transvaginal Scan (TVS) is an internal ultrasound that involves inserting a small probe into the vagina to capture detailed images of reproductive organs, including the uterus, ovaries, and fallopian tubes. TVS is often recommended for early-stage pregnancy confirmation or for investigating specific gynecological issues.

Key Points about TVS Scan:

Purpose: Ideal for early pregnancy confirmation, detecting any complications, and assessing reproductive organs for issues like ovarian cysts or abnormal bleeding.

Procedure: An internal ultrasound with a probe inserted into the vagina, offering high-definition images of the pelvic organs.

Timing: Commonly conducted during early pregnancy (around 6-10 weeks) or for non-pregnancy-related gynecological assessments.

Uses: Helps confirm pregnancy, checks embryo placement, assesses reasons for pelvic pain or bleeding, and can confirm IUD placement.

Patient Comfort: May cause slight discomfort as it is an internal scan.

For those seeking an experienced and gentle approach, Dr. Poonam Goyal is widely regarded as one of the Best Doctors for TVS Scan in Delhi and provides excellent patient care.

What is a Fetal Scan?

A Fetal Scan, an abdominal ultrasound, is focused on monitoring fetal health, growth, and development as pregnancy advances. It differs from a TVS as it is performed on the abdominal area, making it more comfortable for the patient in later stages.

Key Points about Fetal Scan:

Purpose: Primarily used to assess fetal growth, detect any congenital abnormalities, and monitor the baby’s health.

Procedure: A non-invasive external ultrasound conducted through the abdomen, allowing for easy visualization of the fetus and placenta.

Timing: Typically done during the second trimester (around 18-22 weeks) to check for congenital issues and monitor fetal development.

Uses: Provides insights into fetal growth, amniotic fluid levels, placenta position, fetal movement, and overall health.

Patient Comfort: Non-invasive and usually more comfortable than an internal scan, especially later in pregnancy.

For expectant parents looking for clarity and comfort, Dr. Poonam Goyal, one of the Best Doctors for Fetal Scan in Delhi, ensures that every scan is conducted with care and precision.

Key Differences Between TVS Scan and Fetal Scan

Type of Procedure: TVS is an internal scan (through the vagina) while a fetal scan is an external, abdominal scan.

Primary Purpose: TVS is used for early pregnancy confirmation or gynecological assessments, whereas a fetal scan focuses on fetal growth and health monitoring.

When It’s Recommended: TVS is usually conducted in early pregnancy or for gynecological issues; fetal scans are generally done in the second trimester and beyond.

Patient Comfort: TVS may cause mild discomfort due to its internal nature, while a fetal scan is more comfortable and non-invasive in later stages.

Best Use: TVS is ideal for early pregnancy and pelvic assessments, whereas a fetal scan is used for tracking fetal health, growth, and detecting any congenital anomalies.

Why Choose Dr. Poonam Goyal?

Dr. Poonam Goyal is a highly respected expert in both TVS and fetal scans. With extensive experience, she offers a patient-centered approach, ensuring each patient feels comfortable, informed, and reassured. Whether for early pregnancy confirmation or ongoing fetal monitoring, Dr. Goyal’s clinic is known for using advanced ultrasound technology, providing precise, personalized care that supports expectant parents at every stage.

For patients seeking the Best Doctor for Fetal Scan in Delhi or the Best Doctor for TVS Scan in Delhi, Dr. Poonam Goyal is an outstanding choice, providing both accuracy and compassion in her care.

[babyscanning]

What to Expect: Your Guide to Private Ultrasound Scans

If you're pregnant or have medical concerns that require imaging, you might be considering a private ultrasound scan. This option can provide valuable insights and a more personalized experience than traditional hospital scans. But what exactly can you expect from this process?

Arrival and Environment

When you arrive at a private clinic for your ultrasound, you'll typically find a welcoming and comfortable environment. Most clinics prioritize creating a relaxed atmosphere to help ease any anxiety. You’ll be greeted by friendly staff who will explain the process and answer any questions you may have before the scan begins.

The Procedure

Once you’re ready for your scan, the sonographer will guide you into the examination room. The procedure usually lasts about 30 minutes. You’ll be asked to lie down on an examination table, and a gel will be applied to your abdomen. This gel helps create a better connection between the transducer and your skin, improving the quality of the images captured.

The sonographer will then use a handheld device called a transducer to emit sound waves and create images of your internal organs or, in the case of pregnancy, your developing baby. You’ll be able to see real-time images on a monitor, which can be a thrilling experience, especially when you spot your baby's heartbeat or movements.

Types of Scans

Private ultrasound clinics offer a variety of scans, including:

Early Pregnancy Scans: These are usually performed between 6 to 10 weeks to confirm the pregnancy and check for a heartbeat.

Gender Determination Scans: Often done around 16 weeks, these scans can reveal the sex of your baby.

Growth Scans: Conducted later in pregnancy to monitor the growth and development of the fetus, these scans help assess whether the baby is growing as expected.

3D and 4D Scans: Many private clinics offer advanced imaging techniques, allowing you to see your baby in three dimensions or even in motion, adding an exciting dimension to the experience.

After the Scan

Once the scan is complete, the sonographer will provide you with a detailed report and may even give you printouts of the images. This report is valuable for your medical records and can be shared with your healthcare provider if needed.

You’ll also have the opportunity to ask any questions about the results right away. This immediate access to information can be incredibly reassuring for expectant parents who may have concerns about their pregnancy.

Conclusion

In summary, a private ultrasound scan can be an enriching experience, offering peace of mind and invaluable insights into your pregnancy or health. From the welcoming environment to the high-quality imaging and personalized care, these scans are designed to meet your needs and provide reassurance during an important time in your life. Whether you’re early in your pregnancy or nearing delivery, considering a private ultrasound can make your journey smoother and more enjoyable.

[fetalmedicinexpert]

Early Pregnancy Scan in Lucknow

An Early Pregnancy Scan in Lucknow stages is essential to confirm pregnancy and assess the condition of the fetus. Most scans are performed between 6 and 12 weeks; the pregnancy scan gives crucial information regarding the development of the embryo's heartbeat and its place of birth. It's an indispensable tool for expecting parents and their families, assuring an uninjured start. Make an appointment for your scan now to ensure peace and clarity!