#dump that grinch ass boy!!

[ofcloudsandstars]

sp00pqueen replied to your post “May I have a carolmancy reading pleeease? ❤️❄️”

This is crazy spot on. I just broke up with my boyfriend of almost two years last night and am still deciding if it should be for good. Staying together would be easier, definitely, but I think separating is the best choice, especially now that I’ve had this. Thank you so much.

lol ohhh my god!!! It’s funny when you read for people you don’t know cause like I don’t know your life so its just a lot of prodding in the dark and hoping it makes sense. I thought it was strange to get the grinch song with the cards I pulled but I’m glad it was something that can give you some helpful insight!! 

Yeah huge changes like that can be overwhelming but it always pays off to do something challenging that will improve your life in the future. Sorry to hear that you’re facing that challenge and I hope everything will get better for you soon! 

[luxekook]

when fire meets frost | kth

as part of the christmas with bangtan: secret santa collab

❅ pairing: kim taehyung x reader

❅ genre: second chance romance, exes to lovers, angst, smut, fluff

❅ summary: just like a bad holiday song, you gave taehyung your heart last christmas. only in this scenario, he broke it eight months later. now you’re both back at that same damn holiday party where you first met one year ago and you’re just praying for you and your heart to leave in one piece.

❅ word count: 5.8k

❅ warnings: 18+, cursing, suggestive comments, drinking, DIY mistletoe, light violence, random ‘A Streetcar Named Desire’ references, drunk tae (TM), break-up flashbacks, weird humor, hella tension, hella groveling, making out, smut [oral (m to f)], the fluffiest of fluff (borderline cheese...actually...full-on cheese)

❅ banner by: the almighty and powerful maggie @kimtaehyunq​ - who also is the collab host!

Present Day: The Christmas Party, 8:00PM

Taehyung is staring at you. Again. Though you're facing slightly away from him, you know that if you give even the slightest glance over, your suspicions will all but be confirmed. The heated gaze you feel skimming over your body continues as you take a much needed sip of your mulled wine and pray that you get out of his line of vision soon with your dignity still intact.

Seokjin, your best friend and current partner in conversation, notices your predicament and scoffs, “You really should just put that boy out of his misery, (y/n). Scrooge himself would be down to have a foursome with the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future if he was around all this pent-up sexual tension.”

Your red-painted lips curl in a surely unattractive manner that resembles something between a grimace and a grin. You’ve heard variations of this argument about a dozen times from just as many sources, but Seokjin’s might just be the most absurd.

“I don’t know how or why your brain went right to a ghost-fucking analogy, but I’ve long since given up trying to understand your thought processes.”

Seokjin’s chest puffs up at your words like they incite something he should feel proud of. You sigh and shake your head at him, feeling a mix of exasperation and endearment - a constant haze of comfort you feel around your best friend.

“I’m just saying,” Seokjin continues, completely undeterred by your attempts to divert the conversation onto him, “He’s hot. You’re hot. He’s still into you. You’re still into him. I don’t see the problem.”

“I never said–!” You cut yourself off. He’s baiting you. “You son of a nutcracker. You know full well what the problem is. I’ve told you more times than Yoongi has yelled at someone for getting too close to his precious sound system.

At your words, you both look over to your left where Yoongi is currently chewing out a sheepish Namjoon with a death-grip on his expensive ass speakers.

“And I’ve told you that your reasons are shaky at best, (y/n),” Seokjin sighs, placing his chin in his palm and leaning over to you. He continues with a conspiring whisper, “Just because you’re scared you’ll get hurt again doesn’t mean you should never put yourself back out there.”

“Oh yeah,” You scowl, “That’s easy for you to say. You’ve never been dumped by the boy you love because he ‘wants to explore other options’. And then have to keep being around said-boy because you’re in the same friend group. And then fast forward a few months to when that same boy shows up drunk at your doorstep asking for you to take him back because you’re ‘the only one for him’. Spoiler alert: that’s fucking bullshit. And then–”

Seokjin slaps a palm over your mouth, effectively cutting you off mid-rant. “Babe, you have to stop rehashing this. Taehyung clearly is still in love with you. He looks at you like he wants to fucking eat you for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Besides, Tae hasn’t even hooked up with anyone since he asked for another chance.”

“That we know of,” You mumble darkly behind Seokjin’s palm - your words only a barely audible jumble of syllables.

“Are you accosting my date, Jin?” The voice of your co-worker and close friend Felix meets your ears as you shove Seokjin’s hand off of you. When you invited Felix to come to Jimin’s annual holiday party, you briefed him on the situation - like any good friend would. You needed him there as an extra buffer. While you love Seokjin, he definitely can get swept up into petty drama - namely baseless arguments with Jungkook.

As your closest work friend, Felix knows all about you and Taehyung, and therefore he agreed to be your “date” in exchange for your help in getting him a date with Alicia, the new accountant in your office. You’ve spent countless hours sitting next to each other as desk neighbors and coworkers. Felix is quiet, cute and respectful - not to mention his voice is to die for.

Felix’s hand settles on the middle of your back in completely friendly territory, but you can’t help but feel the eyes on you have ramped up in intensity. You wonder if Felix can feel his hand burning from the heat and almost think he does when Felix drops his hand a second later.

It’s one thing to make you uncomfortable. You’ve learned to stomach that. But it’s another thing to make your friends uncomfortable. And for that you turn and level a glare at that beautiful asshole, sitting at a nearby table with Jimin and still looking at you with those goddamn eyes.

Taehyung shamelessly stares back at you as Jimin prattles on about something in his ear before noticing Tae’s mind is elsewhere. Following his gaze to you, Jimin groans and shoves Taehyung’s shoulder before strutting away towards the kitchen. You watch as Jimin saunters by and roll your eyes when he winks at you when your eyes meet. That one has always been trouble.

When you turn back around, Taehyung is still staring at you. No, this time he’s staring at your body - namely, your ass. You ignore the burst of heat that runs through you and make a face somewhere between a scowl and a glare. He looks up at you without the least bit of remorse.

Your eyes narrow. Your ass isn’t even out! Your green ugly Christmas sweater adorned with real ornaments basically falls to your knees. But then again, Taehyung has always had a vivid imagination - and an even better memory. His mind is like a goddamn vault.

You tug your attention away from your ex and back to the current conversation. But your thoughts wander. You still feel that pull towards Taehyung - that same damn pull that’s been there since you first met him. And that scares the shit out of you.

Flashback: The First Meeting, Last Christmas

You’re perched on the arm of Namjoon’s black pleather sofa (“It doesn’t stain! Can you believe that?” “Namjoon, it’s ripped in seven places.”). Surveying the flurry of friends scattered throughout the cozy apartment, you only see a few people that you don’t know. But something feels different tonight, and you just can’t figure out why.

Did Namjoon rearrange his plants? Did Jimin part his hair differently? Did Hoseok change his outfit - again?  

“A-yo, (y/n)!” Seokjin yells over to you from clear across the room. You’re always baffled at how clueless that boy is to social cues. “Come meet Taehyung!” Your friend continues to yell, practically pinwheeling his arms to beckon you over to his side of the room. You can vaguely make out an unknown figure standing with their back to you, facing Seokjin in conversation.

You sigh. Might as well get this over with before Seokjin decides to start pretending to lasso you over to his side of the room. Or worse - get his actual lasso that he has for some unknown reason. A natural performer that boy is. Getting to your feet, you cross the room. Your heartbeat thuds in your chest and you rub a hand over your heart absentmindedly.

What is wrong with you? Meeting new people always brings nerves, but you never usually feel this out of sorts. You step into Seokjin’s outstretched arm and into the embrace of your best friend. And then you look up at the newcomer.

Hooded dark eyes. Curly black hair. Perfect pink lips. Jawline chiseled by the gods.

Your breath catches in your throat. Words buzz in the air around you but you can't distinguish one from the next. You’re pretty sure Seokjin is making some sort of joke because his sides start to shake and the beautiful stranger looks exasperatedly amused. Yet, his eyes never stray from yours.

His lips part like his breath is caught in his throat.

“Taehyung-ie, don’t be rude! Say hi!” Seokjin shoves Taehyung, jolting you both out of your little staring contest.

“Hi,” Taehyung repeats. Your stomach flips at the depth of his voice. “I’m Taehyung. Kim Taehyung. You can call me Tae. Or V. Or just Taehyung.”

Your smile widens at his ramblings and the rising color of his cheeks. “Hi, Tae,” You can't help but grin up at the adorable, beautiful boy. He really looks angelic under the kitchen lights. His halo of curls frames his face in such a way that makes you want to curl your finger around one and tug.

Vaguely, you can tell that Seokjin is shooting rapid looks between you and Taehyung, looking like some sort of bobblehead in 100mph winds. Suddenly, a Grinch-like grin takes over his face. “Why don’t you crazy kids get some more wine? I need to talk to Yoongi...” Seokjin slips away.

In hindsight, you should have immediately been tipped off that Seokjin was up to no good. Seokjin seeking out Yoongi? Nothing good ever comes from that.

And you were right. Not twenty minutes later, you and Taehyung are both stuttering messes underneath a hastily tapped up branch of mistletoe - at least that’s what Seokjin’s calling it. You think it looks like a clump of grass with a grape thrown in there.

Just as you start to tell Taehyung that he doesn’t have to feel pressured by your lame friends, he cups your face in his hands and lowers his lips to yours.

Fucking magic.

There aren’t fireworks or sparks. There’s a whole blazing inferno between the two of you.

Your hands slide up his back, tangling in the curls at the nape of his neck. Taehyung lets out a small gasp as your fingers tug on his locks, and you slowly slide your tongue across his lower lip.

“Uh, okay… Hello? Hey, guys!”

Finally, Yoongi slams together two pans from the kitchen, jolting you both away from each other in fright.

“Break that shit up,” Yoongi shoots a glare at a grinning Seokjin. “I did not sign up for that level of PDA, Jin.”

“I can’t predict love, Yoongi-ah. I can only bring lovers together,” Jin sighs, clasping his hands over his heart dramatically. Yoongi pinches Seokjin in the side, immediately instigating a fight.

Taehyung reclaims your attention, shyly intertwining his pinky with yours. In the midst of all the chaos around you, he just looks at you like you are the only thing that matters.

Present Day: The Christmas Party, 9:02PM

“I don’t know how you survive when he looks at you like that. I’m practically melting just being in proximity of the two of you.”

Your friend Ciana’s comment pulls your attention away from your demon of an ex as he strides by, leveling you with a calculated smolder.

It’s a look that says he’s going to fuck you up in the best way - the way that used to leave you weak in the knees and covered in hickies. Taehyung’s fuck me eyes are your kryptonite. He knows it. You know it. The whole party knows it. Hence, it makes sense how he’s shamelessly using them any fucking chance he can just to mess with you.

It’s practically a fulltime job pretending it doesn't affect you. And it's a job you are failing at miserably.

You sigh and take a big sip of your drink. “Oh, I'm not surviving,” You confess, “This is just a hologram image of me. I’m practically clear across the country by now.”

Ciana laughs, “Girl, I don't blame you, but I have to say… He looks like he would follow you anywhere.”

You scoff. There was a time where you would wholeheartedly agree. Since your first meeting, Tae made you feel like you were the center of his universe.

After talking all night at Seokjin’s party, you exchanged numbers and within a few days Tae asked you out.

Your first date was to an art gallery. The two of you spent hours there, studying art and exchanging soft murmured interpretations. You would often catch Taehyung staring at you instead of at the paintings decorating the walls, and it made you feel all warm and fuzzy.

The dates continued until Taehyung managed to gather up the courage to ask you to be exclusive - his words, not yours. You hadn’t believed that he could ever have doubted your answer. But in hindsight, you probably should have doubted him.

Things were great for a while. No - they were better than great. They were the best eight months of your fucking life. Until they weren’t.

“Why did y’all break up again?” Ciana asks, pulling your attention to her once more.

You let a bitter laugh escape. “You’ll have to ask him that.”

Flashback: The Break-Up, August

“I want to see other people.”

The words strike you like a serrated blade. The plate you’re washing falls into the sink with a clatter. Your heart stills in your chest.

“What?” For a second you believe that you must have misheard him. Only he crushes that hope into dust within seconds.

“I said I want to see other people.” Taehyung repeats, a bit louder.

“You mean like taking a break?” You refuse to turn around and face him. You refuse to believe that your relationship is crumbling down. Your mind tries to grasp at straws. “Or trying ethical non-monogamy?”

“No, (y/n),” Taehyung sighs, “I mean that I want to break up.”

“But why? I don’t understand.” The tears begin to sting your eyes as you blink rapidly, trying to make sense of the blindside that Taehyung just threw at you. “What did I do? How can I fix this?”

“You can’t, okay?” The exasperation in his voice is palpable. “I’m bored here. I feel tied down. We’re both so young... How can we know we’re right for each other when there’s so many other people out there?”

“Where the hell is this coming from?” You seethe, finally whirling to face him. Taehyung flinches when he sees your tearstained face but you persevere and continue, “I bore you? That’s sure not what it seemed like two days ago when you were fucking me against the wall of that club bathroom.”

“Things change,” Taehyung scowls, “I need to explore other options, (y/n), and I think you should, too.”

Your heart is breaking, a fissure splitting it right down the middle. “You want to explore other options,” You repeat, in a deadpan voice. “Do you already have someone in mind?”

The split second pause Taehyung takes is all you need to know the answer to that.

“Get out.”

“(Y/n), it wasn’t the only reason!” Taehyung scrambles to explain. “We haven’t even done anything yet!”

“Oh, you’re a ‘we’ already? Fuck you, Kim Taehyung.”

“No! That’s not what I meant!”

“Well, I hope you’re happy with them. I hope they don’t bore you or tie you down. I hope you’re right for each other. I hope youre fucking happy with yourself and your decision.”

“Can’t we still be friends?”

You don’t deem that question worthy enough of an answer and slam your front door in the face of the person who ten minutes ago had been the love of your life.

Present Day: The Christmas Party, 10:21PM

The amount of love in the room is making your stomach turn. You watch as your coupled up friends exchange presents and kisses. You’re so happy for each and every one of them, don’t get you wrong. You just can’t help but feel increasingly alone with each passing minute.

Felix notices the dip in your mood and nudges you, “Hey. You okay?”

“Yeah,” You snuggle deeper into his side. Thank god for Felix. “Thanks for coming with me to this shindig. It would have been hard to be alone this year.”

“No worries, babe. Besides, how else am I gonna get Alicia to go out with me?”

You laugh at Felix’s words. The boy was oblivious to the fact that Alicia had already approached you to ask if he was single. Sometimes you enjoy your diabolical mind. “Oh, she’ll definitely go out with you,” You reply, pinching his cheek, “Who could resist this face?”

“You did. Three years ago,” Felix whines, shoving your hand away from him playfully.

“Sadly you’re not my type, pretty boy,” You sigh. It truly was sad. Felix is the nicest human you know - besides Seokjin. The fact that you're not interested just reinforces the idea that you have terrible taste in men.

“You’re thinking about him again, aren’t you?”

“I don’t know who you could possibly be referring to,” You sniff, turning away.

“Oh, I don’t know… Maybe the guy that hasn’t stopped circling you like a fucking shark in water since we got here?”

“He has not,” You retort, rolling your eyes.

“A-ha! So you do know exactly who I’m referring to, you little liar!”

“Goddamnit,” You laugh. “I need another drink to put up with you. You want a refill?” You gesture towards his cup.

“Nah, I’m good,” Felix shakes his head. You nod and head over to the kitchen, thankfully seeing no sign of ‘Shark Boy’.

But you spoke too soon, because just as you’re reaching up for a new mug you feel him.

“Is that little boy out there your boyfriend? I didn’t think you were dating anyone,” A rough voice growls from entirely too close to your ear.

You turn your head and shoot your best side-eye at the asshole who’s heated stare is aimed straight down at you. You internally curse at the unfortunate fact that Kim Taehyung somehow still can manage to look gorgeous in a bright red sweater with a whole-ass Santa beard stitched to its collar. You have never hated him more given that you look like a hot mess of a Christmas tree that no one wants to climb.

“I don’t see how that is any of your business, Kim,” You retort, turning around again and grabbing a glass from the cabinet. You can feel his warmth surrounding you as he grabs the mug for you instead, his body pushed up against yours.

“Move,” You order, your voice shaking slightly. But instead of listening, Tae grabs your hips and turns you around, caging you in between his arms.

“See, you’re wrong, (y/n),” His eyes dart from your own to your lips, “Everything that concerns you is my business. It has since the moment I met you, and it hasn’t stopped since.”

The incredulous snort escapes you before you can attempt to rein it in, “Taehyung, you broke up with me! I’m pretty sure that means you consider me old news and - above all - none of your fucking business.”

“And I told you I made a mistake!” Taehyung leans closer, his jaw ticking.

“You were drunk!” You stab a finger into his admittedly toned chest that you can feel even through that abominable Santa beard, “And it took you two fucking months to say that, only to never bring it up again. So excuse me if I find your argument lacking.”

“Fuck,” Taehyung curses softly, running a hand through his mess of curls, “I miss that smart mouth.”

“Yeah?” Your response flies out too fast for your brain to check your words, “Well I miss being enough for you.”

Taehyung looks stricken. “Baby…” He reaches for you but you duck past him and beeline straight for Jimin’s bathroom. Locking yourself inside, you slide to the floor and contemplate your chances of sneaking out the tiny bathroom window just like you did that night some months ago.

Flashback: A Streetcar Named WTF, October

A harsh banging sound jolts you awake. “What the fuck,” You mumble, fumbling around blindly trying to find your phone amidst the blankets and pillows surrounding you.

Finally, your hand locates the small metal device and you switch your screen on. Your eyes immediately shut at the brightness and you muster up the will to peek at the time.

3:12AM.

Who the hell dares to pound on your door at this hour? What is this - A Streetcar Named Desire? Well, slap your ass and call you Blanche because this asshole is about to feel your wrath.

Stomping over to your door, you swing it open and say, “There’s no Stella here, Stanley. Fuck off.”

While you don’t find a drunk Marlon Brando on your doorstep, you do find a drunk Taehyung.

“Who the fuck’s Stanley?” Tae glares, trying to cross his arms but failing somehow.

“Good lord, Taehyung,” You groan, grabbing his arm and dragging him inside your apartment, “You smell like a whole goddamn brewery. How did you even end up here?”

“Walked,” He says proudly while smiling down at your hand on his arm like an idiot. “Who’s Stamplee? I mean, Stangfree.”

You pinch your nose with your free hand. This boy… Ignoring his idiocy completely, you question, “You walked?” You push him down onto your couch and head into your kitchen to grab him some water.

“Yup! All by myself! Are you proud of me? Sandflea could never!”

You jump. Somehow Tae still managed to sneak up behind you while drunk out of his mind.

“Kim Taehyung, sit your drunk ass down.” You jab a finger in the direction of the couch he just vacated.

“But you’re so far away when I sit all the way over there, baby,” He pouts, giving you puppy dog eyes. “And I’m not drunk!”

You don’t dignify his words with a response. Handing the glass of water to the problem currently sprawled out on your couch, you sigh. What are you going to do with him? He can’t stay here… But he’s in no shape to walk back to wherever the fuck he came from.

“Tell me, Kim, why did you think that walking to my apartment of all places was a good idea? I could have moved!” Disdain drips from every syllable, “Is anything going on in that brain of yours? If so, it’s clearly not making any sense.”

“I beg to differ,” Taehyung has the audacity to grin up at you as he continues, “My brain makes perfect sense, baby. You plus me equals three.” His eyebrows wiggle up and down as he swings his hands out, showering you with the glass of water you just handed him.

“Maybe I’ll call you a math tutor along with your Uber,” You mumble as you fight the urge to laugh at the mess of a boy staring up at you from your couch. Grabbing a kitchen towel, you dab the water off of you as best you can. Glancing back down at Tae, you notice his attention has fallen to your chest, where the water he practically threw at you has plastered your tanktop to your skin.

“Hey, eyes up here,” You slap his arm with the damp towel, but he doesn’t even flinch.

“One more minute,” He says, absentmindedly rubbing his arm.

His attention gives you butterflies for a split second before you lock that shit down. You aren’t a fool; you’re fully aware that Taehyung’s the farthest thing from available, but he’s still hot as hell with his muscular stature, his wicked brown eyes, and his full pink lips. And that deep voice… it has shamefully been the fuel of your fantasies for the past few weeks. But that is neither here nor there.

So while his undivided attention always did make you feel fucking incredible, now he’s just a drunk boy who’s acting like he’s never seen nipples before.

“I’m calling you an Uber, okay?” You finally say, grabbing your phone and pulling up the app.

“Can’t I stay here?” Taehyung pouts, “Or will Surley get mad?”

“His name is Stanley,” You automatically reply and then curse as Taehyung lurches to his feet.

“I knew it! Where is he? Where is my replacement? I challenge him to a duel!”

“A duel?” You can’t help but laugh, “On what grounds?”

“For your hand, of course!” Taehyung rapidly glances around your apartment before his eyes land on the broom tucked in the corner of your kitchen. “There’s my sword!”

Before he can take a step towards his ‘sword’, you grab his arm and push him back down onto your couch.

“Wow, you’re strong!” Tae stares up at you adoringly, “And so-o cute. Wanna date?”

“You’re drunk, Tae. Don’t say things like that.” God, he’s going to give you a complex. You had just started getting over him and now he does this? Why is life deadset on fucking you over?

“But I do wanna date you!” Taehyung insists, “Don’t you miss me? Miss us? I still love you. I never stopped.”

“Tae, please stop.”

“I made a mistake, baby, and I wanna fix it. Can you give me a chance? Please?” His brown eyes blink up at you slowly. His lids practically fight to stay open as his words slur together.

The boy is falling asleep. Sighing, you close the Uber app. Looks like you’re housing your ex for the evening.

“I wanna marry you,” He mumbles, “Bought the ring last week. If you can just love me again I’ll be the luckiest…” His words get more and more inaudible. Mumbles about Stanley and revenge and kisses and altars filter through as you place a blanket over his form.

“Goodnight, Tae.” You can’t resist brushing your fingers through his hair. Your heart stutters as he practically leans into your touch like a cat, smiling contentedly.

“We’ll see if you remember this in the morning,” You mutter, setting another glass of water and a bottle of ibuprofen on the coffee table for him when he wakes up.

After making sure Taehyung’s on his side with a bucket for potential incidents, you head back to bed.

When you wake up, he’s nowhere to be found.

Present Day: The Christmas Party, 10:23PM

“(y/n)... baby, please let me in.”

The underlying meaning of those six words is not lost on you. Could you let him in again? Taehyung once held your heart and then he basically smashed it on concrete and backed over it with his car - twice.

“Go away.” Your words sound weak even to your own ears.

“No, I need to talk to you… Please.” His voice breaks on the last word and you cave. Standing you unlock the door and back up. You could have a logical and reasonable discussion with Tae and get some closure, leaving all feelings out of it. Maybe...

“Two minutes,” You declare, “Nothing more.”

“But–”

You cut him off, “1:55…” You tap your foot and smile as Taehyung shoots you a look.

“Fine,” He rubs the back of his neck, peeking up at you under his lashes. “I got scared, okay?”

Your disbelief must show all over your face because he continues.

“Yeah, I was scared - fucking terrified of how much I feel for you. How in love with you I am. How can it be that easy to find your soulmate? It didn’t make any sense to me. And then Pia began to show an interest in me and I convinced myself it was a good idea to distance myself from you. To see other people. To try to make sense of my feelings.”

You hold up a hand. “So, you’re saying that you broke up with me because you were ‘too in love with me?’ What the fuck kind of selfish bullshit is that, Taehyung? You broke my fucking heart for someone you didn’t even like because you were scared I was your soulmate? Don’t you see how that just makes me feel like shit?”

Taehyung sinks to his knees. “(Y/n), baby, please. I am so sorry. I fucked up in the worst, most selfish way possible. It kills me that I broke your heart.”

“Ugh, get up, you drama king.” You pull him to his feet, continuing, “Why did you leave after that night? You said all those things when you were drunk and then just left.”

“Yeah, I kind of don’t remember what I said or how I even ended up at your place.” A blush takes over his face, “It’s so embarrassing you had to see me like that and I kind of just wanted to forget it happened. And I really hoped that you forgot it did, too. I didn’t expect you to just keep acting like you forgot my existence altogether.”

“What does that mean? I see you all the time, Tae! We’re in the same friend group for god’s sakes. We’re around each other all the time… Maybe even too much.” You mumble the last few words, but he catches them.

“Too much? You avoid me at all costs! You don’t smile at me anymore. You don’t even look at me most times! It kills me that all I get from you now is ice, when I know you have so much fire.”

His words confuse you. So he does want you back? Your friends weren’t exaggerating? A small burst of hope swells inside you, but the memory of the break-up outweighs it. “You don’t even know me though, Taehyung. Not anymore.”

“No. You’re wrong,” Taehyung leans closer to you, and you take a step back. Your back bumps up against the sink, your plastic ornaments adorning your sweater clinking awkwardly.

Tae brushes a stray hair behind your ear, his eyes begging you to listen, “I do know you. I know that you still take your coffee black with caramel. I know that you started doing yoga but are too proud to admit you hate it. I know that you came to my art show last month but left before I could talk to you alone. I know that you–”

“Stop,” Your voice trembles, “Please, I can’t. Taehyung, you hurt me so fucking much. Don’t you get that? I just started feeling whole again. So if I let you back in and you hurt me, I might shatter completely.”

His hands cup your face gently, wiping away a tear you hadn’t even realized had fallen. “I won’t ever hurt you again, baby. Please give me one more chance. That’s all I need. I want to keep you forever, (y/n)... I bought you a ring, did I tell you that when I was drunk? I think I did. I still have it. It’s yours - just like my heart.”

“God, you’re still so fucking cheesy,” You can’t hold back your smile even though more tears are falling down your cheeks.

And then his lips are on yours.

Taehyung kisses you like you're the most precious thing in the universe. Like you might break in the palm of his hand if he’s not careful enough. And maybe you will. But for right now, you melt into him.

He tastes like home.

Taehyung’s touch is tentative at first. His hands slide into your hair, tugging you even closer. You feel like you might burst, feeling so many emotions. Love. Fear. Confusion. Hope. You hook your leg around him, wanting him pressed against you everywhere.

Taehyung groans and one of his hands drops down to grab your thigh, wrapping it more securely around his waist. “Jump, baby,” He mumbles into your lips, and you listen automatically.

He perches you on the edge of the sink, kisses you deeply, and then sinks back down to his knees.

“Tae–” You protest, as he runs his hands slowly up your calves.

“I haven’t tasted you in so long, baby,” His dark eyes burn into yours, “Please don’t let me go another minute without you on my tongue.”

Fuck. Well, you can’t argue with that. When Tae sees you open your legs a bit more, he grins up at you and places a quick kiss on the inside of your knee.

His touch becomes more frantic as he moves up, his mouth placing hot kisses higher and higher.

When he sees the lacy red panties you have on, he snaps, lunging forward and hitching your thigh over his shoulder. Pushing your underwear to the side, his hot mouth is on you, closing over your clit without warning. You gasp as he sucks your bud into his mouth, lapping at it with his tongue.

Your hand winds its way into his curls, pushing him harder against you. He moans into your pussy. “So fucking wet for me, baby. God, I love you.”

Taehyung places a soft kiss on your inner thigh before his tongue returns to lick at your pussy, up and down. His tongue sinks into you, making your hips buck against his face. His hand shoots up to steady you as his tongue continues to flick in and out of you.

The sight of the boy you never stopped loving tongue deep in your pussy almost pushes you over the edge already. “Ta-ae,” You moan, hand tugging at his hair, “Harder, baby, please.”

Your words have their desired effect as he replaces his tongue with two of his fingers and places his mouth back on your clit. You moan as his fingers curl inside you, brushing your walls.

The first few strokes of his fingers are slow. Too slow for your liking, “Taehyung, fuck me with your fingers.”

A rumble moves up his chest as he obeys, pushing another finger deep inside of you. “Fuck, baby,” He curses and begins to thrust his fingers in and out of your pussy, “You feel even better than I remember, so goddamn wet.”

His mouth finally returns to your clit, his tongue flicking over it every so often. You’re hurtling towards your orgasm as his long fingers continue to pound into you and his mouth continues to lick at your pussy.

You feel the heat building up and you come with a gasp. Taehyung continues to fuck you with his fingers and his mouth, carrying you through your orgasm until you slump back against the mirror above the sink.

Taehyung grins up at you, licking up everything you gave him. Finally, you gently push him off you. Still licking his fingers clean, Taehyung’s eyes sparkle up at you, “Well? Wanna get married?”

“Oh my god,” You burst out laughing, hopping off the sink onto shaky legs. “Why don’t you start by wooing me? We’ll go from there.”

“Challenge accepted.”

You blink.

Taehyung smiles. His wild dark curls are sticking up in random places - courtesy of your hands. His eyes are full of their usual sinful promises, but this time they also hold excitement and a tiny spark of hope. “Prepare to be wooed, wifey.”

“Fuck off,” You laugh, quickly fixing your hair in the mirror before smoothing down your sweater dress.

Nodding at your semi-acceptable reflection, you swing the door open to reveal just about every person from the party collectively gathered just outside.

“I knew it!” Seokjin shrieks. “Where’s my mistletoe?”

“My poor bathroom!” Jimin cries, “Defiled! Desecrated!”

“Why am I friends with you all?” Yoongi asks no one in particular.

“Well,” Tae whispers in your ear, “At least we won’t have to tell them, right?”

You smile despite the embarrassing situation and nod. This Christmas might just be your best yet.

a/n: sorry that this is late and severely unedited LOL plz be kind, this is my first fic back and YA GIRL IS RUSTY

© luxekook do not repost, edit or translate as protected under this license

[ktheist]

finale — show me yours & i’ll show you mine

➙ muses. seokjin x college student / gamer!reader ft. best friend! taehyung

➙ genre. best friend’s brother au. university au. working au. fwb au.

➙ word. 2.1k

➙ index. 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | finale | side story 1 |

➙ synopsis. 

“show me yours and i’ll show you mine.”

x

“be nice," taehyung mouths across from you as he sits next to mina.

the red handprints on his cheeks becoming more apparent with each passing minute. it was half-believable to say taehyung fell face first in the snow, got stuck there for more than two minutes and voila, sported a red face upon your return to the kim’s.

but now, you’re just lucky no one’s pointing out the very obvious palm shaped mark on his pudgy cheeks as he stuffs his face with food.

“oh, mina, do you have any plans tomorrow? you could stay over and spend christmas morning with us," mrs kim asks as she passes the bowl of the roasted potatoes seokjin’s been boasting about.

“o-oh,” the brunette stammers, holding the fork with both hands as if citing a prayer of hope, “no, i couldn’t intrude on you any longer.”

“no such thing, we’re all family here.” mrs kim waves a dismissive hand and even that brief gesture feels warm, “___’s mother and i have known your mother since we were kids and i watch you two grow up with my boys - you’re basically  daughters i never had,” she shoots you a smile, eyes crinkling in the corners.

not seeing the remark coming, you end up almost choking on the mushroom soup you’re just in the middle of enjoying.

“i can’t say i’d love to have tae as a sibling but here we are,” you jest, half-heartedly while laughter erupts from everyone at the table.

if there’s a god, please don’t let mrs kim find out i fucked her oldest son.

“i heard yuukal co is interested in your flower arrangements and wanna buy exclusive rights to have you deliver them to the company whenever they have an event lined up?” namjoon chirps up, dimples digging into his cheek as he digs into his 

“the secretary of yuukal co was an acquaintance of mine in college, that’s probably why.” the brunette says shyly, pushing her hair to the back of her ear.

“so, you’re not planning on going back to college?” 

but it’s your voice that makes her blink once and stare at you like you’re some tricky math question.

“what- oh,” she shakes her head, as if shaking away the trance that delayed her response, “i don’t know, my major has nothing to do with what i want to do so i’m thinking of taking another year off.”

you nod casually. understandingly. “i’m sure the college has plenty of spots for people who actually wants to be there, i guess.”

it’s not a new low. but it’s a kind of low you never usually stoop to.

no one seems to notice though, as mina laughs. obviously uncomfortable by your remark, “haha yeah.”

“taehyung got offered a job at the company he interned in last year,” with a smack on the aforementioned boy’s back, seokjin proudly announces.

and just like that, taehyung takes the spotlight to himself.

“oh my god, that’s wonderful news. kim taehyung, when were you going to tell us?” mrs. kim is the first to say something, eyes brimming with anticipation as she looks at him, waiting for him to tell everyone at the table more about it.

but the fact of the matter is, kim taehyung is torn between working a nine-to-five, subsequently making his parents proud or going professional as a full time gamer.

he breathes out an ‘uh...’ before his lips curl into a forced smile.

“surprise?”

x

some time after dinner, you end up drinking and playing card games. mrs kim already went to bed and it's a hour past midnight and all four of your find yourselves in your house to not disturb the kim couples.

the grinch is playing in the background because you, taehyung and mina won against namjoon and seokjin who wanted to watch frozen.

“frozen is so unchristmasy,” taehyung complained.

though, at one point, you did backtrack a little - only a teensy bit - and sided with seokjin who looked like he just won a lottery when you casually say, “i mean frozen’s got that wintry feeling and christmas is in-”

“oh girl, not you choosing a man over your best friend,” taehyung started tickling your sides as giggles erupted from your lips while trying to beg for forgiveness.

 “okay! okay! i’m grinch team all the way!”

“is that allowed? yah! you can’t say that after converting to team frozen!” seokjin’s rebuttal sounded every bit casual.

in retrospect, him joining taehyung’s ticklish assault would have felt out of character had you not fucked behind taehyung’s back nor kissed like you were star crossed lovers just hours ago.

“two against one! not fair! seokjin- ah- hahahaha!” 

one good thing came out of it though: you ended up sitting next to seokjin. it made you a little too conscious of him - of his cologne, of his thigh that brushes against yours with every movement you make and pretend like it’s nothing and of the ghost of a touch of his pinky finger that lingers on your knee when he seemingly places a hand on his own knee. 

still, it’s the closest you could ever be in public and it’s enough to tell mina to back off.

she doesn’t seem to notice but her compliments are equally distributed to everyone in the room. she seems to be the giggly drunk. giggling at every single thing everyone say.

somewhere deep in your heart, you feel the guilt gnawing because of your uncalled for hostility.

“i better get home,” she starts to stand at 3:07 am and you wave a dismissive hand, “no, it’s so late. stay over. please. you promised to make me your special hot chocolate in the morning.”

she objects at first like she turned down mrs kim’s invitation to spend christmas morning at the kim’s. and that’s how you know your views have been blinded with jealousy to see mina for who she is - a cute, lovable girl who’d be the heroine of every romance novel there is.

“oh thank you, thank you!” her arms flail around before they wrap around you in a drunken hug.

you laugh, hugging back.

x

the memories of how you huddled together like children and fell asleep in the living room, is hazy but when you wake up - the time on your screen displaying a 6 something am - you find a blanket draped over your body.

the light from the kitchen pours over the living room but not enough to wake the slumbering bodies there.

seokjin shoots you a smile when he sees you ambling over to the dining table with hair pointing in every direction, eyes squinting trying to block out the light while holding the blanket around your shoulders.

“you’re working? jinnie, it’s christmas,” you whine, head resting on his shoulder, feeling your heartbeat skip at the small contact.

he chuckles, bumping his cheek against your head before you hear the sound the keyboard again.

you stay like that, blanket curled around your body, seokjin typing away at his laptop.

that is, until his velvet voice cuts through the silence.

“so... i reckon that red handprint on tae’s cheek isn’t because he fell face first in snow.”

“it was because i slapped him in the face,” you wave your injured hand that’s now wrapped with a panda printed band aid instead of the duck ones seokjin used in the beginning.

he takes your hand, making sure not to apply too much pressure on the injury and kisses the top of your hand, “why would you do that?”

your cheeks warm at the gesture but you clear your throat, trying to play it cool, “because he told me we looked good together after all that shit he put us through.”

silence lulls in once again.

it feels like the longest you’ve ever gone with your heart palpitating inside your chest and unspoken words hovering over you but not quite reaching the who they’re supposed to reach.

“do we?” seokjin muses.

“do we... what?” you ask despite having an inkling of what he means.

“look good.” he turns to you, one arm on the table, thumb brushing against your pinky finger.

“i don’t know- we never even took selfies together.” you shrug.

“i think our selfies would look cute,” he pauses, naturally pouty lips curling into a smile, “so cute that the guys in your dm’s would be devastated to know that you’re dating me.”

“i can’t... do this,” the words slip out of your mouth like a waterfall like it’s bound to pour out of your heart through your mouth at some point, “because taehyung was... right. i don’t have a love language - even if i did, it’d be being jealous of every girl that talks to you. lashing out at those girls even though it’s completely understandable why they’d have heart eyes when they talk to you because you’re just that amazing... and... and... you like me? why?”

seokjin’s eyes look like someone personally plucked stars from the sky and trap them in those dark brown irises.

no- actually, he’s looking at you like you’re the star and he’s the moon that shines silver white rays just to have you notice him.

“who’s to say i don’t get jealous?” he cups your face, brows furrowing like you’re a math question without a solution and he’s going mad trying to figure you out, “i get so jealous at the thought of guys sliding into your dm’s, let alone make a pass on you but then i thought ‘if she’s not looking at me then i just have to try harder to make her notice me’ and i might or might not’ve reciprocated mina’s passes to make you jealous...”

you feel the corners of your lips tugging into a smile as you smack his chest lightly, “ass.”

that earns a chuckle from the man before he goes on, “but i’m not even sure what my love language is either, last i used it, i ended up getting dumped because apparently i’m too boring.”

“you’re not boring...” red flashes in your vision as you spit out the word, offended, “your dad jokes are bad but that’s what makes them so lovable. you’re so tall but you’re a literal walking teddy bear. you have biggest, kindest heart... and you’re so hung.”

something devious and prideful flashes across his eyes for the briefest moment before he asks ever so softly, “yeah?”

“yes.” you take his hands and grip them tightly, wishing the touch would convey your feelings.

“isn’t that kind of your love language?” his thumb feels callous against your skin as he rubs circles on the back of your hand. but that’s what makes this feels real - an affirmation that you’re not dreaming, “so... show me more... show yours and i’ll show you mine.”

you’d want to say you share a deep, passionate kiss to seal your promise for each other. but when you open your eyes - not knowing when you closed it - you’re staring at the white ceiling with neon starry stickers tacked up on it. 

and seokjin?

he’s nowhere to be found.

the morning air sends shivers down your spine as you pull your blanket over your head, trying to tune out taehyung’s voice.

but the universe seems set on kicking your sleepy ass of your bed when the door swings open with a bang! 

“get up! get up! it’s christmas!” the tall boy literally screams in your ears before hoisting you over his shoulder like a sack of potato and setting you down on the toilet in the bathroom with a “you better wash your face by the time i come back!”

you do as told.

eventually.

since the presents are all set under the christmas tree at the kim’s and you’re not looking to upload a christmas morning story in mismatched pj’s, you change into a cute totoro onesie.

mr and mrs kim got mina - she thanked you for letting her stay over last night even though you woke up to an empty house, she even has different clothes on than last night - new kits for the florist.

taehyung almost hugged you to death when he unwrapped his new ps5 that he’s been dying for.

namjoon got a new pair of gucci loafers from taehyung and booked an interrogation slot with their mother because-

“kim taehyung, where did you get all this money?”

you suspect he’s going to reveal his gaming channel to her where he got sponsors from to buy namjoon those loafers.

and seokjin gifted you with a heartshaped necklace as well as a new pc set for taehyung and a signed book of namjoon’s favorite writer that he’d been talking about for ages as well as an all expense paid trip for his parents to thailand.

“thanks for the necklace,” you lightly bump seokjin’s elbow as you come to stand next to him at the sink. he’s washing the mug he used for hot coffee.

he steals a glance at his family and mina in the living room. they’re laughing over taehyung having his head down, sitting on his calves like he’s asking for the forgiveness of a lifetime after confessing that he didn’t want to work a nine-to-five and wanted to go pro.

then his eyes find yours again. the glint in them makes your heart stop before he leans down, lips brushing yours ever so gently yet very seokjin-like.

you think your heart just burst as you freeze in your spot, staring up at the man with slightly parted lips and warm cheeks like a high school girl whose crush very obviously hinted he likes her back.

he raises a quizzical brow at your reaction before realization settles on his face and his lips curve into a smirk, “what? did you think last night was all a dream?”

x

taglist.  @aretha170 @scalubera @ambersaesthetics @heyjiminnie @hyuck-me @fanfuckingfic @fangurl-ontgeside @bri-mal @waves-and-woods @rjsmochii​ @kimmieloveswho​

[spidercakes]

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four

Omega!Peter and Alpha!Tony.

Warning: Peter is 17 (Tony is a year and a half older), there’s some mentions of abuse (not with the main pairing), feminization (Peter).

*

Peter has to take like twenty pictures before he arranges himself just right in the frame and sends it off to Quentin. When his phone buzzes he gets a noncommittal niceand Peter stares at the phone for a few moments because he’s kind of pissed, actually. When Quent sends him a picture he’s supposed to fawn all over him but he gets nicewith no punctuation? Really? Ugh, he’s so damn sick of Quentin being likethat because he’s suresomeone else would appreciate his efforts and he’s sotempted to test it too because his skirt is cuteand the picture is fucking artful, okay? He even made sure the lighting was nice. Fucking Quent.

He stews on that for a long time, texting the group chat back and forth about it while he does math homework, ugh. Ned, probably because he kind of hates Quentin, tells him he should do it and when he asks for MJ’s advice he’s pretty sure she encourages him because she loves drama so long as it doesn’t involve her. Liz, as always, is the voice of reason and tells him he’s just frustrated, which is truebut also. He just wants to know, for scienceas MJ helpfully put it, if someone else would actually give him a half way decent response. Not that that’s hard when your competition is nice, no punctuation.

Its not like he’s really considering it much when he scrolls through his contact list on account of everyone he knows knows Quentin, obviously, and they’d obviously pass the information of him sending out saucy pictures to other people. And then Peter would have to deal with thatlike Quentin doesn’t flirt with every omega that moves not that Peter can do that, godforbid. Ned told him once that if he wanted a knot that badly he should get a dildo because they don’t talk back and Peter’s tempted some days because he’s sure a dildo would take less work to care for than Quentin’s big ass ego.

So maybe that’s why he lingers over Tony Stark’s name and he can’t even remember howhe got his number but its not like he goes to their high school anymore and even when he did he hated Quent so its not like he’d sayanything if Peter sent him something. For science, just to see if Quent really isa jackass or maybe he’s just overreacting.

For S C I E N C EMJ texts and he really shouldn’t.

You should just dump himNed adds in the group chat.

Omg guys stop it! Just talk to him like a normal human!Liz says, remaining the voice of reason.

Talking is for people, not QuentinsMJ sends back and Peter snickers.

Send me saucy pics, will rate them out of tenNed says with three laughing emojis.

We all already vet them the fuck are you on about that pic was cute as fuckMJ says.

Hey wait, is that my skirt? Liz says and Peter looks down. Well, maybe.

Nohe lies.

Omg it is give that back I’ve been looking for it everywhere!

You didn’t notice until we after we vetted the pic I say Peter should be allowed to keep itNed says.

You’re cute as hell Liz but it does look better on PeterMJ adds.

You guys suck. Don’t send that pic to anyone!Liz says.

Peter nods, knowing she’s right when his phone buzzes again and its Quent and the asshole, the asshole!

What, is that it? Gunna send more or are you back to being a tease?

A tease? “Oh fuck you Quentin,” Peter snaps, finding Tony’s number in his phone again and sending him the damn picture. He knows he’s being stupid but it makes him feel better so… that’s not an excuse but whatever, he doesn’t care.

Tony’s response doesn’t take long.

Um.

Think that was meant for someone else.

I deleted it obvs.

Because like

I’m not a piece of shit

The texts come in quick succession because apparently Tony doesn’t have a thing about double texting, Peter guesses. He considers the response for a moment before he sends something back.

And if I said that was meant for you?

Because that’s what he wanted to know, right? Except sending out racy pictures to people who didn’t ask for them is kind of creepy and now Peter feels bad because it’s not like he enjoys it when it happens to him. Mostly because the pictures always look like fucking prisonsecurityphotos and whether or not he asked for them pictures with poor composition are a total turn off. His phone buzzes, then buzzes again right away and Peter figures either MJ dropped something horrible like the Grinch sucking a dick into the group chat again or its Tony. He sighs, picking it up and resigning himself to his fate either way when he notices its Tony.

AFHPWURE

Ok

What the fuck did I do to get this luck lmao

This is like

The best gift when studying

That skirt is so much more interesting than physics

Kinda mad I deleted it now

Peter smiles a little and sends it back just to be polite like that. Tony keeps up the trend of responding quickly, phone buzzing as his messages come in.

Bro

I don’t want to look the gift horse in the mouth

But also what prompted this

But also also I kind of don’t care

I am 100% on board with whatever this is

Like probably even 200%

Or more

Point is you’re the best

And also like really cute

I don’t remember you being that cute

Peter reads all the messages and laughs, shaking his head because apparently Tony says whatever is on his mind but, for science, he figures maybe he’ll send him a little something else too. It’s always good to try and repeat your results, right? So he abandons his desk and homework in favor of his bed, carefully laying himself down on his stomach as he hikes the skirt a little higher around his waist so the pleats sit justlong enough to cover his ass as he opens the camera on his phone. He watches the mirror in the background as he lifts his legs, crossing them at the ankles and spreading his legs just a bit. Its more than a little suggestive, if Tony takes the time to look in the background of the picture anyway. From the front is a pretty cute picture with half his face in the frame while the rest of it is taken up with an artful shot of his body. With the skirt hiked up like that its still pretty risqué but the devil is in the details.

He sends it off to Tony, for science reasons purely or at least that’s what he tells himself anyway. If he’s honest he kind of likes the attention because he missesit and it always feels like he has to jump through hoops to get Quent to pay him any attention at all. Tony doesn’t seem to need as much plying.

Omg

I’m so torn

On one hand, physics exam. Worth 40% of my grade

On the other hand

He sends back a close up of Peter’s picture with a red circle drawn around the mirror and a lot of exclamation points.

You see my dilemma, surely

And like

I’m good at physics I can probably pass without studying

So, science concluded, Quentin is a fucking dick and Peter bites his lip, unsure what to do here so he drops a message into the group chat fully anticipating Liz judging him so he’s a little surprised when she answers first and tells him to just dump Quent. MJ and Ned respond ‘fuck him’ at the same time and Peter considers his options for a moment.

*

Its not like Peter meantfor this to happen but Quent was being a total assholeagain and Peter has been told he’s got the patience of a saint but even he has his limits. So he had dumped Quent maybe a little too publically considering he told him to stuff it in the middle of the cafeteria before storming off and Tony happened to send one of his adorably stupid jokes at the right time. But still, its not like he meantfor it to lead to him in the back seat of Tony’s car with his arms wrapped around Tony’s neck as Tony guides his hips the way he wants. “Yes, baby, just like that,” Tony tells him as he moves, “feel so good,” he murmurs as he moves one of his hands up Peter’s bare back.

He moans at the praise, pressing his forehead to Tony’s. “Yes,” he murmurs into Tony’s mouth as he kisses him, “touch me.” Tony does, hands roaming up his back and down again, brushing over his hips, up his sides and down his chest. Tony touches him like he can’t get enough and Peter feels the sharp flush of arousal at Tony’s hands explore his body.

Tony lets out a soft groan, “so wet for me baby,” Tony tells him, shifting his hips up into Peter’s.

Peter nods, breathless. “Like the way you touch me,” he murmurs into Tony’s mouth as he kisses him. Tony reaches up and brushes his fingers across Peter’s cheek and he can feelthe way he produces more slick in response.

“What, never had anyone take care of you?” Tony murmurs, eyes soft and caring as he runs his fingers through Peter’s hair. He shakes his head because Quent wasn’t like… badat sex, actually he was pretty good at it, but Peter kind of always felt like a means to an end rather than an actual participant. Tony wasn’t like that from the start. Peter knew as soon as Tony saw him, conveniently wearing that skirt he’d first sent pictures of himself in, he’d wanted to fuck him but he let Peter make the first move and made sure everything he did was okay. Peter wouldn’t have thought he’d like that much, he’s always had a bit of a thingfor bad boys but its not like Tony doesn’t look the part. He just doesn’t act it and Peter finds that surprisingly attractive.

“Up, baby,” Tony murmurs, patting the underside of Peter’s ass and he frowns.

“What? No,” he says, full well knowing that he sounds whiney and Tony laughs.

“Shh, baby s’not like that. Lay back, let me take care of you,” he murmurs, leaning forward and kissing Peter softly as he guides him off. Peter still makes a noise at the loss but lets Tony lay him out over the seat of the car. It’s awkward, in the cramped space, but Tony makes do as he settles between Peter’s legs. His hand curls around the outside of Peter’s right knee, thumb softly caressing the skin there as he looks down at Peter. “Fuckyou are gorgeous,” he murmurs, leaning in and pressing a kiss to the inside of his thigh.

He sucks in a breath and Tony smiles at him as he kisses him again, carefully sucking at the soft skin of his inner thigh. Peter’s breath hitches again as Tony moves a little lower, kisses soft and sweet as he moves his way down. His legs fall further apart mostly of their own accord, a silent invitation for Tony to keep going. “Tony,” Peter all but whines as Tony takes his time.

Tony lifts his head from where he’s nipping at the inside of Peter thigh, “yeah, baby?” he murmurs.

Peter makes a soft, frustrated noise. “Give me more than that,” he tells Tony.

Tony grins, giving the inside of Peter’s though one last kiss before he shifts his position. “Hm, guess I should give you a little something for wearing this, shouldn’t I?” he asks, toying with the edge of Peter’s skirt.

“Wanted you to want me,” Peter tells him and Tony laughs.

“Mission fucking accomplished. But you could have done that wearing a paper bag,” Tony says.

Peter lets out a breathless laugh, “flatterer,” he accuses lightly.

Tony shakes his head though, “mm, I’m not much of a flatterer unless it’s earned. And fuck, its like you’re made just for me you’re so perfect,” Tony tells him as he lifts his skirt and licks up the length of his dick, root to tip and Peter gasps, one hand flying into Tony’s hair as he takes Peter into his mouth.

“Tony!” Peter gasps, grip on his hair tightening and Tony moans around him. Peter does his best to keep his hips from jerking involuntarily as Tony works him over. He’s clearly practiced, skilled with the use of his tongue and Peter moans loudly, back arching as Tony’s head bobs over him.

His breath comes faster as he moans and this mostly only seems to encourage Tony, who enthusiastically throws himself into it and Peter finds that almost as hot as the blowjob. Quent didn’t really go down on him much, always complained that he was too loud and squirmed too much to make it worth his time but Tony doesn’t seem to have a problem with it. Judging from the way his fingers flex on Peter’s thighs and the way he moans when Peter does he’d say Tony actively likes his squirminess so Quent can suck it. Figuratively seems how he couldn’t be assed to do it literally.

Tony shifts a little, shifting as his fingers trail up Peter’s inner thigh until they hit his ass. Peter gasps as he runs his fingers over his hole, teasing lightly. “Tony, please,” Peter tells him, tugging on his hair a bit as encouragement. Tony moans softly and presses two fingers in and Peter can’t help the way his hips jerk up a little. Tony doesn’t complain about it as he fucks into Peter with his fingers. Peter’s breath is coming in ragged as the pleasure builds and he bites his lip.

“Tony,” Peter says, grip on Tony’s hair tight. “Tony ‘m gunna,” Peter stops, moaning as Tony’s fingers curl a little inside him and his hips buck up again. He shifts his legs so they’re open a little wider and Tony moans around him again. Peter throws his head back, biting his lip. “Tony ‘m gunna cum,” he tells him.

Tony takes that as encouragement to pick up the pace and the shit he’s doing with his tongue is fucking sinfuland Peter finally gets who people likethis kind of thing. “Tony,” he says, one hand gripping the seat he’s on hard and the other still tightly woven in Tony’s hair. “Tony ‘m gunna… gunna- oh, oh!” he says, head thrown back as he cums, letting Tony suck him through it. He allows himself to relax for a few moments before he musters the energy to look down at Tony, who looks pleased with himself.

“How’d you like that, baby?” he asks and Peter lets out a soft laugh.

“I think I might be in love with you,” he says, only half joking.

*

Quent looks pissed and Peter doesn’t really give a shit. “Oh shut upQuentin, this is your own fault for not appreciating me enough,” Peter tells him.

Quentin rolls his eyes, “oh, like you can do any better, Peter,” he snaps.

Peter snorts, “it didn’t even take me twenty four hours to find better Quent. You suck thatmuch and not even literally! God, you’re such a prick you couldn’t even be bothered to go down on me once and a damn while!” he says, throwing his hands up in frustration. He ignores the laughter of his classmates because Quent was the one who started yelling in the hallway so this is hisfault really. He resents that Quent looks so mad about this because Peter was happy to have just dumped him and that could have been the end of it but no.

“Dude, not going down on you is automatic dumpage material considering I knowhe expected you to do it,” MJ says off to the side.

“Oh fuck off,” Quent snaps at her but she looks nonplussed.

“Not my fault you’re the fucking worst Quentin. If you wanted Peter so stick around maybe you shouldn’t have made him cry at least twice a week. Didn’t think I had to write that one down for you,” she says, rolling her eyes.

That earns a laugh out of his classmates too and if MJ weren’t so cool about the whole thing, and if they weren’t currently surrounded by witnesses, Peter doesn’t really want to consider what Quent would do. Instead of dealing with her he turns to glare at Peter, “whatever the hell you picked up so isn’t better than me,” he says and Peter squints at him.

“Oh my god, Quent its not even a competition. It would be cruel to stick you in a competition with Tony anyway; its like throwing a fish on land and having it race a cheetah. It’s sad and stupid and all you’ll do is flop around and be pathetic. The fact that he’s better than you isn’t even something I need to think about, it’s just obvious,” he says.

At least Tony listens when he talks, and he likes Star Wars too and he didn’t make fun of him for wanting to build Star Wars Lego things with Ned. Actually he sort of invited himself along and they all had a greattime and ordered pizza because Tony’s not a total dick.

Quent turns an unflattering shade of red at his words and he reaches out for Peter but someone pulls him back. He looks behind him to find Liz there, Ned right beside her looking surprisingly ready to fight considering Ned can’t even manage to win a battle with finding matching socks. “Leave him alone Quentin, he said your done and you are. You don’t get to decide your not,” Liz tells him.

“Also,” Peter adds, “and this is the important part- I moved onand let me tell you a god damn rock would have been more affectionate than you ever were. And wash your god damn football shit, it smells like jock strap and dead things,” he snaps and his classmates erupt in laughter so hard they don’t cut it out this time, laughing over whatever it is that Quentin says back as Liz drags him off.

“Okay,” Ned says once they’re outside. “That was badass,” he tells Peter.

“Good for you,” MJ tells him. “You should have throat punched him though.”

Liz frowns, “why do you always suggest doing that?” she asks.

MJ shrugs, “always wanted to see someone get throat punched and Quentin has a punchable throat,” she says. “By the way just because Ned approves of your new guy that you moved on to waytoo fast doesn’t mean he’s made it past me. Liz doesn’t count because she’s a pushover,” MJ tells him.

“I am not! Just because I don’t suggest punching people doesn’t mean I put up with people’s crap. And for the record if I had to watch anyone get throat punched I would definitely want it to be Quentin,” she tells him. “He does have a punchable throat. And a punchable everything else too.”

“Yeah, but he’s hot,” Peter says, offering up Quentin’s only redeeming quality.

MJ makes a face, “okay,” she says sarcastically and Peter resents that. They all know Quentin is hot and has nothing else to offer so he feels he should get credit there even if he only gets credit there. God, at least Tony has a personality.

[moonstruckbucky]

Let It Snow

Request:  Going ice skating with Billy (he never ice skated bc he's from Cali) and then getting warm in bed together 😏

Pairing: Billy Hargrove x fem!Reader

Word Count: 2.3k

Warnings: This is equal parts filth and equal parts smut. Because I couldn’t choose so why not both? Penetration (wrap it before you tap it), oral (m receiving), fingering.

Rating: 18+ (seriously guys, don’t get me deleted. Keep your underage eyes away)

Notes: Gonna thank my girl @hopperhargrove for requesting this amazing prompt because, damn I’m dying. 

Billy hated the winter, hated just about anything that had to do with cold weather. He was from California for fuck’s sake, where everything was warmth and sunshine. Fall in Hawkins was cold enough, and then November hit, and he thought that was cold.

Then the fucking snow came.

Billy was never one for hats and gloves and all that cold-weather jazz, but goddammit if he didn’t at least shove a pair of gloves on his hands when he went out to warm up his Camaro. The poor engine took longer than normal to start, unused to the bitter cold of Hawkins, and for a second, he worried his girl wouldn’t start.

But the roaring engine turned over and he grudgingly drove to your house to take you to school. You were standing on the sidewalk, looking adorable all bundled up in a scarf, hat, and mittens, and Billy thought maybe winter wasn’t so bad. Your nose was bright red from the cold, and you smiled brightly at him as you shuffled into the warm car.

“What’s with the long face?” you asked, pulling your mittens off to press your hands to the heaters. You sighed in relief as the blood rushed back into your fingers.

“It’s fucking cold,” Billy grumbled, banging a quick u-turn to head towards school.

“It’s December,” you giggled.

“It still sucks.”

“Grinch,” you teased. His eyes glanced over at you briefly, a smirk tilting up one corner of his mouth.

“Damn straight, Rudolph.”

Gasping in mock offense, you covered your cold nose, spurring Billy to chuckle and reach over for your hand. You hummed at the warmth radiating from his skin, sinking further into the seat.

“So I was thinking,” you started, your fingers idly playing with the rings on Billy’s.

“Uh oh,” he interjected with a grin. You flicked the back of his hand with a pout. “Kidding.”

“Anyways, I was thinking we’d do something fun this weekend.”

“Don’t we always do something fun?” he questioned with a lecherous grin. Blushing, you tapped his hand on the top of your thigh.

“Not that kind of fun, you pervert. I thought we could go ice skating.” Billy grimaced and his mouth opened, no doubt to say no. “Come on, B. It’s supposed to snow at the end of the week, and the lake’s frozen over. It looks so pretty after the snow’s fallen! Please, B.”

There was only one situation in which you’d willingly beg, and Billy seemed to take this into consideration as he single-handedly spun the wheel into a parking spot at the school. He threw it in park and sat back in his seat, twisting his hand in your grip to lace your fingers together.

Your expression was hopeful, eyes wide like a kid waiting to be told she could open a Christmas present early, bottom lip caged between your teeth in bubbly anticipation. Even though ice skating was definitely not his thing, how could he possibly say no to that face?

“Fine, we can go,” he relented. He couldn’t stop the small smile from curving up his mouth as you celebrated with a squeal in the passenger seat. He turned into your touch when you leaned across the console to kiss his cheek, his skin warm under your lips.

“I’ll make it worth your while,” you whispered lowly, teasing him just a little by swiping your tongue along the shell of his ear. Grinning when he shuddered, his exhale a rattle in his throat, you sat back and popped open your door. As Billy watched you for a moment, taking in the way your hips swayed as you walked, he wondered just what the hell he got himself into.

“Christ, I can’t do this,” Billy muttered, fingers gripping tightly to a low-hanging branch. How the hell did he let you convince him to go ice skating? He cursed as his skate moved along the ice, nearly dumping him on his ass, but he held his balance.

“Come on, B!” you cheered from a few feet away, gliding elegantly along the ice. The two of you weren’t the only ones with the idea to go skating today.

Despite the sun shining, the lake was completely frozen over like you predicted, a few families deciding to not waste the good weather indoors. They skated around the far end of the lake, away from you and Billy, who was still struggling to stand, much less skate.

With a giggle you skated over to him and held out your hands. “Come on, take my hands. I’ll hold you up.”

Billy held tighter to the branch. “I don’t want to fall on you.”

“You won’t, I promise. That’s it, let go of the branch. Good.” Billy’s hands were warm where they gripped tightly to yours. He was bent at the waist, arms stretched comically out in front of him, as he fought to maintain his balance.

Slowly, you skated backwards, tugging him along behind you. “You gotta stand up straight, babe. You’ve got no balance.”

He looked at you as if you’d just sprouted another head. “Are you crazy? I’ll fall!”

“You won’t fall, you big baby. Now come on, straighten up.”

Billy ended up falling a total of three times, and after the third time he decided he’d had enough. He tossed your skates into his trunk after you’d changed back into your shoes and cranked the heat, pressing his frozen fingers to the vents.

“Such a baby,” you giggled, huddling into your jacket and scarf. “But you did well for a first timer.”

Billy pulled the car into the driveway, relieved when you noted that your parents were away. He had you all to himself, and his frigid bones needed warming up. He pressed himself against you as you fumbled to unlock the door, the kisses he laid on the back of your neck wet, warm, and full of intent.

“Billy,” you giggled, “let me open this.”

“But I’m cold, baby,” he whined with an exaggerated roll of his hips into your backside. It made you bite your lip against a whimper, fingers hurrying to twist the key in the lock.

You barely made it inside and down the hall to your bedroom before Billy was kissing you, all heat and need. He pressed your body into your bedroom door, cold hands diving under your sweater in search of warmth.

You squeaked. “Jesus, B, you’re freezing.”

“I know. Better warm me up, princess.”

With a wicked grin you got to work unbuttoning his shirt, hands dancing over his shoulders as they were bared to you, and you leaned forward to pepper wet kisses down his jaw and to his neck. Your teeth found the dip in his collarbone, and they teased gently at the skin, drawing blood to the surface.

His throat rumbled in a growl as his hands yanked your sweater over your head, leaving you in a pretty lace bra he wanted to take off with his teeth. Another time, as his mind was pulled elsewhere when your hands made quick work of his jeans.

You knelt as you tugged them down his thighs, followed soon by his boxers. He stepped out of both and kicked them away, leaving him naked in all his golden, surfer-boy glory. His cock was at attention, curved up against his stomach, the head red, swollen, and leaking. It made your mouth water, and you ghosted your hands up his thighs, through the short, coarse hairs that covered them. Bracing one hand on his hip, the other teased at his balls, pulling a ragged hiss from between his teeth. Smirking, you let the one hand play as you leaned forward and licked a stripe up the underside of his shaft, along the thick vein that pulsed with need.

He was hot and heavy on your tongue as your mouth enveloped him, lips stretching wide to accommodate his girth. He honest-to-goodness whined as you took him further, your tongue pillowing him and stroking along that vein, until he hit the back of your throat. You swallowed around him, and his hands dive into your hair, fingers twisting and tugging at the strands as you suck greedily on his cock.

It would never not be a turn-on to have Billy Hargrove turn to putty in your hands. Right now was no different, as his hips began to thrust into your mouth and your eyes watered each time the tip of him touched the back of your throat. The noises he was making were slowly tearing apart your self-control, shredding any chance of this being slow and gentle. Each grunt, each whine of your name had your thighs clenching together and your own moans vibrating against the shaft of his dick.

He moaned, “N-Not like this. Need to be inside you.”

Releasing him with a wet pop, you barely had a minute to relax your jaw before he hauled you up against his body, lightly shining in sweat, and kissed you deeply. Like a flower to the sun, you opened up to him, his tongue sliding in and licking into your mouth. He groaned at the heady taste of himself on your tongue and his hands shucked your jeans. Hands under your thighs, he lifted you easily, allowing you to wrap your legs around his trim waist as he laid you back on your bed. 

You sighed at the softness of the pillow under your head, at the change in Billy’s kiss from hard and needy to slow and sensual. His hands roved your body, unclasping your bra to throw it elsewhere, thumbs teasing your nipples into hard peaks. You shifted your hips, gasping against his mouth when his hardness brushed against your clothed and dripping center.

He groaned into your mouth, pulling away just enough that his lips ghosted yours as he spoke. “God, you’re so wet for me, baby.”

To prove his point further, he dropped a hand down between you, dipping into your panties to cup your sex. His middle finger drifted along your slit, sending shockwaves of pleasure rippling through you. You whined as he teased at your opening, dipping a finger in but never giving you what you needed.

“Billy,” you gasped, arching up as his head ducked to lave at a nipple, teeth lightly scraping. Your cunt clenched, you felt yourself gushing against Billy’s hand as his ministrations brought you closer and closer to your end.

He hummed. “Wonder if I can get you off just like this.”

You dropped your head back, moaning long and low as Billy finally sunk a finger into you, timing the upward curl of his fingers with the lapping of his tongue against your nipple. He swapped to the other one, giving it just as much attention as the others, and drove a second finger inside you. It was damn near maddening, keeping you on the edge of your pleasure. Your hips canted off the bed, needy moans tearing from your throat, as you chased your release.

Billy’s thumb at your clit was your undoing, and it sent you spiraling into a maelstrom of white-hot pleasure, curling your toes and making your vision go white. Your cunt clenched down on Billy’s fingers as they continued to stroke you, easing you through your orgasm. As your trembling began to subside, your chest heaving, Billy pulled his fingers from you, shining in your pleasure. Your mouth went dry as he brought them to his lips, tongue tangling around them to wipe them clean.

His blue eyes were blown black, as he stripped your panties away, dropping them off the side of the bed. Reaching over, he pulled a condom from your drawer and made quick work of rolling it on. Your legs opened wide as he settled between them, the head of his cock dipping between your folds. Your hands found his shoulders as he kissed you deep, and with one smooth roll of his hips he sank into you, groaning at the soft, velvet heat that enveloped him.

His rhythm was deep but slow, his thighs spread wide, knees bracing against the mattress as he pumped his hips. He slid a hand under your ass, angling your hips just right that had you tossing your head back with a gasp. Nails digging red crescent moons into his flesh, you lifted your hips to meet him, leaning up to kiss him deeply. He let his free hand tangle with yours, pinning it to the pillow beside your head as he snapped his hips, head dropping into the crook of your neck as ecstacy vowed to claim you both.

“Billy,” it trailed off on a moan, “’m close, baby.”

He grunted his reply, a deep, “Me too,” and then his pace picked up. The obscene sounds of his thighs meeting your ass, the wet sound of his body meeting yours, filled the silence in the bedroom. Billy pulled his hand out from under you, reaching between you to twirl circles around your clit. Body spasming, your orgasm took you over, curving your back and causing your nails to draw blood in his back. Electricity shot through your veins, sparking every nerve ending. Your mouth opened in a silent scream, and Billy laid kisses across your throat, collarbone, and chest, until he let go with a feral growl into your skin.

He spilled into the condom, hips stuttering as his eyes squeezed shut. Leaning back, he laid his forehead against yours and rolled, keeping your bodies together. He hitched one of your legs over his hip and drew circles on your thigh as the two of you fought for breath.

“Might have to make you go ice skating more often,” you said breathlessly, tucking your head under his chin. His chest heaved beneath your hand as you laid it there, fingertips toying with the medallion around his neck.

He chuckled quietly but didn’t answer verbally. Instead, he pressed a lingering kiss to your sweaty forehead, arm winding around your shoulders to pull you closer. As he felt you drift off to sleep, sufficiently exhausted, Billy laid awake with his eyes closed, relishing in the warmth you provided not only his body but his heart as well.

Billy Hargrove Tag List: @casaharrington / @moirasimagines / @billyhardgrove / @dacremontgomerylover / @dacresgirl / @hotstuffhargrove / @thatonecurlygirl / @delicatelyherdreams / @hargrove-mayfield / @swirlyoreo / @sheseiler

Permanent Tag List: @so-not-hotmess / @hotstuffhargrove / @moirasimagines / @baebee35 / @deathbyarabbit / @disagreetoagree / @cherryblcssm / @alex–awesome–22 / @sophiealiice / @yknott81 / @cassiopeia-barrow / @tearsforhan / @ ssstutteringbbbill / @hargrovehoe / @thephantomofthe-internet

[i-am-parsec]

Unaddressed Letters - Part II

Sweating, breathing sharply, a boy around seventeen years old runs down the street, chasing a feminine figure in the distance. The girl, an old friend, immediately recognizes his voice as he calls out her name but doesn’t turn around, simply chuckles. Eventually, he catches up with her and swiftly lifts her up with both arms, holding her only a few inches above the floor. She yells at him, demanding to be put down and while he mocks her, a few seconds later, he complies.

“That’s what you get for ignoring me.”

“Fuck you.”

They stay silent for a beat, and then giggle like little kids.

“I got news for you, Mrs. Grinch. I convinced Theo to play a song for us.”

“You did what?”

Her expression is somewhere between disgusted and baffled. It catches him completely off guard.

“I just...well, since we are going together t-to the dance and you said you hated the music they chose I thought...you’d like to, you know...have the chance to dance to at least one song you actually...enjoy...”

She’s not looking at him, too busy messing with the loose button on her shirt.

“You know what, I’ll tell him to forget all about it, it’s a pretty dumb idea actually, I just-”

“Chase.”

Despite the nice spring weather, Chase feels his cheeks - his entire body actually - burning as if it was the hottest day of the year. He hopes she’s not angry - God knows how easily she loses her temper - or getting the wrong idea, he didn’t mean “a song for us” as in “this is going to be our song for the rest of our days since you and I are totally going to get married one day and live happily ever after”. No, not all. Why the fuck would he want that?! That’s crazy.

He was just trying to be a good friend.

But maybe he messed up.

Maybe she’s mad now.

“The problem is not the music, Brody; the problem is I can’t dance to save my life!”

“Then why the fuck did you agree to go with me to the dance?”

“Because you’re already pretty lame as it, dude, wouldn’t want you to going around the dance floor looking like a fucking lonely loser.”

There’s the spark again.

“I’m going to carry your fat ass all the way to the beach and dump you into the fucking ocean, Stacy, I fucking swear.”

“As if. With those chicken legs of yours, you couldn’t carry me to the end of the street.”

Smiling, she slowly starts heading to the bus stop. He follows. He always does. When they get there, they see two unfamiliar men in the opposite corner who don’t look all that friendly. Ignoring them, they sit on the bench and as Chase realizes their gaze lingers on Stacy’s shirt for a bit too long, he instinctively puts his left arm around her shoulders. She snuggles against him, no questions asked. No questions needed. The men look away and both teenagers let out a breath they didn’t realize they were holding.

“Do you know them?” Stacy whispers against his friend’s chest. He glances at them one more time before shaking his head.

“No, but they have the same tattoos Marcos’ brother has. They are probably from the same gang.”

“Well, the bus should be here in a few minutes, so hopefully we can all go on our merry way without any inconvenience.”

“Relax, woman, they seem to be waiting for someone, not looking for trouble.”

“Oh, and you can tell because of your many years of dealing with gang members?”

Silence. Uncomfortable, heavy, horrid silence. Stacy wishes she could fucking think from time to time, at least before talking.

“I’m sorry, dude.”

“Hey, it’s okay. It’s the truth, anyways. I am used to being around that kind of assholes.

“Still, I promised I’d try to be a little less bitchy with you, and so far, I’m doing horribly.”

“Hey, you haven’t hit me in like a week- that’s progress.”

And they laugh again. This, this is how it works. One falls down, the other picks them up. They are a team. Stacy hugs his waist, hiding her face from the world. If she focuses on this feeling, this wrinkled t-shirt, this charming, sweet boy, then she feels safe. He hugs her back, holding her tightly, filling his lungs with the cheap perfume that he has learned to love. When he looks up, at the end of street, he sees it.

“Fucking finally, there’s the bus.”

Once they are already in, they debate for the entirety of the one hour long ride which song they’ll pick. Despite her initial resilience, Stacy seems to really enjoy the idea of choosing a song just for them.

By the time they get home, the decision has been made.

‘I Don't Feel Like Dancing’ by Scissor Sisters.

If they can’t follow the rhythm at least they’ll be able to laugh at the irony.

More info, previous chapters and tag list under the cut 

All chapters in chronological order, here. Previous chapter, here. Next chapter, here . Psst, there’s a bonus prologue added to the tag here.

Once again, huge thanks to my dear @donkey2323, who proof-read this today because my dumb ass forgot to send it earlier and wanted to posted it right away, and also to everyone who read and liked the first part of this story, you guys really have no idea of how happy your comments made me. 

Little clarification: Despite using a good ol’ omniscient narrator on this chapter, I’m mainly going to use the “letters” format for this fanfic. Some chapters may have the format you see here in order to delve into Stacy and Chase’s past, which is one of my main goals for this story.

I’m tagging everyone who liked part I and the “prologue”, but if you don’t want me to, just send me a message, or in the contrary, if you aren’t in the tag list and want be added, simply leave a comment ♡

❤  Tag list ❤: @randomartdudette, @skyewardlight, @scarlet--raven, @sassy-in-glasses, @probablyghosting, @novasingalaxies, @darktrash-drash, @thevampireauthoress, @hishex, @mysterious-cupcake-ninja, @flyingfishflopsthings, @happysingingturtles, @mysticalanimallover, @mijako98, @kitnkas, @beck-pma, @septicuniverse, @fruitycasket, @youllnevertaketheskyfromme, @closedworldofmathiel, @mcomegalletas, @fanfictionrecommendations-com, @amyxmiaplay, @hiimizzyxoxo 

Thank you so much for reading, hope you enjoyed it! If you did, please reblog, that helps me a lot ❤

[collateralfiction]

21

Bailey

Day One in Turks and Caicos; well, more so the first morning spent in this beautiful island. Last night, the crew and I didn’t do much since we were pretty much beat and didn’t have the energy to do something strenuous, so we stayed in the Villas we would be housing for a good week or so. However, today we decided to actually come up with some plans and do something with the time we do have. I was all for it and furthermore for the simple fact that my birthday was tomorrow. This would definitely be a different experience for me not having my family and friends around for my birthday. Even with my father not being around the past two years, I was still surrounded by family. This year around, it’s completely different. I’m around people who are genuinely nice and caring but the circumstance is way too unfortunate and it’s hard to look over that at times.

But I wasn’t going to allow for it to ruin my mood. I’m blessed to be turning twenty-two, alive and breathing. It could be way worse and possibly, my predicament is already the worst case scenario. Shaking my head of those thoughts, I finished getting ready for the day. I brushed my long hair back into a sleek ponytail, making sure that all of my baby hair was slicked down to a T. Justine and I were going to enjoy our morning at the local Spa that was provided in our care packet. The boys were going to stay back and monitor Austin with rotations since he couldn’t be left behind. But knowing how attentive and loving everyone is towards Austin, no one really complained about having to watch him. Besides Justine and I, the boys don’t even seem that interested in us being out of the country. It’s just another hot spot for them.

Placing my brush down, I was finally satisfied with my hair. I made sure I looked presentable before cutting off the light and evacuating out of the bathroom. Adrian laid on the bed diagonally, his phone in his possession, furiously typing away. He’s been on it since we took a shower this morning, throughout breakfast and even now. Deciding to mess with him, I climbed on top of his back and laid in the exact position he was in. “Can you get off your phone for a minute? What’s so important that got you tied up like this?” I questioned.

“Why you worried?” he retorted, locking the device and throwing it towards the top of the bed. “Get off my back. You’re heavy as fuck,” he grunted.

“Am not,” I mumbled. With not a lot of energy, he flipped us around and I was now the one lying underneath him while he laid in between my legs. “But you are,” I grumbled, running my fingers through his hair. It was usually kept neat in a nice shape up, but I guess he stopped caring because it was now growing into a small afro. It was cute though.

“Why you wearing this though? You know niggas thirsty out here,” I was simply wearing a neutral colored romper that just so happened to expose more legs than any other item in my suitcase.

I rolled my eyes playfully. “Last I checked, I was single,”

“So, you just dumped ol’ dude like that?” he smirked.

“Boss shit,” I giggled. “To be honest, I just think we were saving hope onto something that was dead a while ago,”

“So, if you were to see him right now, what would you do?” he inquired.

Tucking my bottom lip into my mouth, I honestly thought about what would be the first thing on my mind. I don’t even know where I stand with Ryan in this moment of time. There’s nothing worse than moving on and not having closure and although I rather not deal with him, it’s inevitable that I will run into him since I tend to hang around in Harlem because of him. “Kick his ass,” I said indifferently. “I mean, that’s the only legit response I have for him. Fuck him,”

“Keep that mentality,” he laughed lightly. “You gon’ need it,” I didn’t bother asking what he meant by that because I know sooner rather than later, I would find out.

“You and these riddling ass words,” I mumbled. He looked at me as if he had something to say but refused to open his mouth on the subject matter. Ryan was secretive as hell and it would be like pulling teeth just to get out the simplest of information out of him. It was crazy knowing that if I wanted information, Riley would be more willing to answer my inquiries than his own brother. “If something’s wrong, can you please tell me? I don’t think it’s fair to keep me in the dark and even if I might react not so calmly, I still feel like I should know,” I articulated, making sure he understood me fully. He raised his head off of my chest and looked me dead in the eyes again.

“Why do you think I don’t tell you certain shit? Honestly too,”

“You’re trying to protect me,” That was the excuse Ryan used every time so what could possibly be the difference in Adrian?

“I’ll protect you regardless if you know something or not, baby girl,” I couldn’t help the smile that came over my face at the pet name baby girl. I’d never hear him say that to Elsa or any other female he had encountered while in my presence and although I didn’t want to look too much into it, I couldn’t help how I felt at the same time. “For the most part, it’s because I know you’ll figure it out with time. The other part is some things are better left unsaid, undone. Say if I never took you, half the shit that has happened between then and now, wouldn’t have occurred. But they did so the what ifs are irrelevant. With time, you’ll know. Just don’t rush it ‘cause as soon as you do that, everything’ll start unraveling,”

“So that means you won’t tell me shit?” I chuckled.

“Stubborn little thing, I see. But no. With it being your birthday tomorrow and all, I won’t but if it comes down to it, fine,”

“Deal,” I murmured, sitting up on my elbows. His lips were so close to touching mine before a loud and obnoxious sound resonated at the door. Groaning deeply, Adrian dropped his head and yelled who is it.

“Your lovely sister!” Justine shouted before opening the door and inviting herself in. Adrian sucked his teeth and rolled off of me while I sat up in bed, checking to make sure my hair was still fine.

“What you want?”

“Not you. I’m here for Bailey actually. You ready or do you still need to finish you two’s moment that I so happened to mess up?” she smirked, giving me one of those knowing looks.

“You can back the fuck up and wait outside,” Adrian muttered. “She’ll be out there in a minute,”

“Okay, you Grinch,” she retorted. “Five minutes!” she warned me, backing up slowly out of the room. She closed the door softly before I heard the patter of her feet decline.

“I hate when she calls me that shit,” he complained. “I be wanting to deck her, yo,”

“What? A Grinch? Now that I think about it…”

“Shut up!” I continued to laugh, although I was just playing with him. But it was actually funny seeing him get worked up because of something small like that.

“It’s okay, Nicholas,” I teased, crawling towards him. He cut his eyes at me before resting his body against the mountains of soft pillows. “Well, I only have five more minutes with you according to Justine, soo…” I grinned, wrapping my arms around his neck as he did the same with my waist.

“I don’t do quickies,” he chuckled.

“I don’t either, but it works,” I retorted. His licked his pink lips slowly before bringing my face towards his and crashing his lips on mine. My arms tightened around his necks as Adrian dominated the kiss, swiftly sliding his tongue into my parted mouth. “Adrian,” I whispered, not wanting to break apart the kiss but if I didn’t, things would certainly get out of hand.

“Later?” he grunted, pulling away from me. I nodded rapidly while trying to regulate my breathing.

“Later,”

It took us a little longer than five minutes for me to actually walk out the room and when we both did, Justine gave us that all too knowing look, again. I simply ignored it while heading towards the door with her hot on my trail. The reservations were for a little after eleven and since it wasn’t too far, we decided to walk and bask in the good summertime weather. “You like my brother, don’t you?” she asked as we continued our journey towards our destination. She’s been bugging me about Adrian for so long now that I think she knows most of the answers before I do. I’m sure she asks Adrian all the time about me and where we stand when I’m not around. Anyhow, Adrian is unique in his own way. He’s rude, blunt and a bit dangerous but he’s also warm hearted; yes, he is, caring and actually lovable. There is always two sides to a person but it just takes time for someone else to see it that way.

“Even if I said no, you would think otherwise,” I chuckled. “I like him, I do,”

“But?” she said implicitly, as if there was a but to begin with. Maybe there is.

“We could never be together,” I said bluntly. It was obvious and more than anything if that was to happen, I know at least one person who would find a problem and immediately want to put an end to whatever situationship Adrian and I have. But even before any of that happens, I doubt Adrian is looking to be in a serious committed relationship. Just off of how he treated Elsa, I can’t see that being me. There’s no point in being in a relationship if that’s how it’s going to look like.

“You sure?” she asked.

“Positive,” I nodded. “No offense to your brother and all but, look at the circumstance, I don’t see it happening,”

“Is that because of your family and friends will judge or because you personally don’t see it? If I do say so myself and it’s not because I’m biased, Adrian is actually better off with somebody like you… cliché, right?  But it’s true,”

“How?” I asked.

“Has he told you about his last girlfriend?” she questioned, fumbling with the gold chain around her neck. I shook my head no. “Well, I won’t either,” she chuckled. Now she has me curious as hell. “I think everyone needs something different and you two can do that for each other,” she said with a small smile.

“I guess,” I said indifferently, my mind already made up. “We’ll cross that bridge if it comes,” I stated, looking ahead at the Spa we would be at for the next three hours. This would be the perfect way to pamper myself before my birthday tomorrow. Justine took charge and talked to the receptionist of the establishment about our reservations before we were led in the back to change. It didn’t take more than ten minutes to do that since we both wore rompers. We had the option of having our massages outside by the water or indoors. We chose the former option, only because we didn’t want to be surrounded by other people.

A blissful sigh escaped my lips the moment I was laid down and every bit of stress in my body was slowly worked on. For the most part, Justine and I remained quiet, basking in our peaceful surrounding. With her being a mother and all, it’s rare that she gets a time like this to herself but lucky for her, she has a brother who’s willing to drop everything to make sure his nephew is straight. “Hot stones are real? What the fuck?” I exclaimed, leaning off of the cotton sheets and clutching the towel to my chest.

“Yes, sweetheart,” The masseuse smiled. Now see, I wasn’t up for that type of relaxation. “It’s not as bad as it seems. It’ll just be placed on your most tense body parts, okay?” I looked over at Justine who was trying badly not to laugh at me and seeing that she was getting the same thing done to her, I eventually gave in. With a sigh, I laid back down and bit into my bottom lip. Next thing I know, she’s going to have us walk on rocks that’re on fire. The first rock was placed on my left shoulder blade and I hissed at how hot it felt. When all six rocks were placed strategically along my back, I breathed in deeply and remained still. Supposedly, they were to stay on for at least twenty to thirty minutes. Goddamn it.

“They’re not that bad, are they?” she teased.

“They’re not… but that doesn’t take away from the fact that I feel like they’re sinking into my flesh,”

“Oh with the dramatics,” she chuckled. “Just bask in it. By the time we get back, you’d rather have that on you than to be around the boys,” she insisted.

“True,” I mumbled. “So, what’s been up with you? Though I should know already. Been talking to anybody… preferably males?” I inquired, turning my head to the side so I could see her facial expression. It was a topic I was discussing with Justine a while back but ended abruptly because of Adrian eavesdropping. I think Adrian has this mentality that absolutely nobody would be good enough for his sister because of Lonnie and albeit it might be true, there’s still a few good people around. I know that Ryan isn’t the best out of the male population but that doesn’t discourage me from finding someone better… or more so a better suit for me and actually will compliment my aura.

“I’m forever single!” she sighed. “You know it’s a problem when my mother dates more than me,” she frowned.

“But that’s the problem. You aren’t dating,” I chuckled. “Get active,”

“I don’t know right now. With me having Austin, I’m a little more cautious with dating and it’s harder to find someone,”

“It doesn’t seem that way,” I said.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” she said, raising up a bit.

“You and Caiden,” I said, returning the favor and teasing her back. Caiden was definitely a sight for sore eyes and I don’t blame Justine for the attraction. If I wasn’t intertwined in this lifestyle, I would probably be more so attracted to Caiden than Adrian. Caiden might have been apart of this lifestyle as well, but he was more rational than most; for example, Ryan and Adrian. I liked that, but it seemed like I attracted the opposites. “Don’t think I don’t catch you two having casual conversations,”

“Oh my God, they are casual,” she tried to defend.

“You sure ‘bout that? Caiden would tell me the opposite in a heartbeat,” I chuckled.

“Alright, alright, Caiden is amazing, and we’ve been talking on the low. It’s nothing serious right now,” she confessed, although I knew this already, I just wanted her to speak on it. Chuckling lowly, I nodded slowly with a cheesy grin. I’m not sure about everyone else but I did pick up on how close they were and how playful they were with one another. Maybe it’s nothing at the moment but that can all change.

“Remind me to make sure I have Austin one day out of the week,” I said. “You know, in case y’all wanna get a little freaky,” I chuckled.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” she giggled slightly. “Thank you, just don’t tell Adrian,”

“Won’t need to worry ‘bout him,” I said. Another fifteen minutes ensued with us being quiet while examining our surroundings. The view overlooked a beautiful scenery of clear blue water. The air wasn’t polluted with the smell of cigarettes or anything resembling New York. The people were much warmer with their personality and it did make me feel comfortable and forget what’s left in New York for me to handle. The masseuses came back and removed the hot stones from off of my back one by one. I laid there for a while as I flexed my muscle blades and slowly sat up. The hot stones weren’t as nearly as bad as some make it out to be but that doesn’t mean I’ll be willing to try it again.

After our hour-long massage, we began to redress and paid for the services. Before going back to the Villa, we were going to grab something to munch on. Justine has been the only female friend I’ve had in the past three months and it was nice that I actually had someone to talk to other than the guys. There was only so much I could discuss with them before I got tired of their insensitivity or if it was the other way around.  Even before Justine, I didn’t have a lot of female friends, well more so after High School. I think it was all apart of one of my phases. I wasn’t too concerned with holding onto friendships back then and I could be held accountable for it, but my lesson is definitely learned, which is why Chance and I are so close.

“I heard their quesadillas are good,” Justine mumbled, taking a sip from her fruity drink.

“I hope it actually is,” I retorted.

“It’ll be good,” she assured. “So, your birthday is tomorrow, is there anything you want to do in particular?”

“Honestly? I have no idea,” I chuckled. “My family would do that for me, you know? They did all the planning and all I had to do was show up. But that’s not the case this time around so it’s really up in the air. Being here is a good birthday gift if that counts as something. Whatever we do has to include Austin though,”

“Don’t you worry your pretty little head. I have the perfect day planned for you tomorrow. Just make sure you get a lot of rest,” I raised my eyebrow up at her but said nothing as our plates of quesadillas were placed in front of us.

Adrian

“Yo, Austin. Stay on this side of the pool. Don’t go near the edge,” I said sternly, taking a seat near the sliding door that had a table and a few chairs around it. Austin declared this morning that he wanted to go swimming and of course I complied. We were on an island that was surrounded by water. How could you not go swimming? However, his intentions were to go swimming in the ocean since there was steps that led directly to itbut I wasn’t sure on him doing that so I offered the pool in the back as the one to go swim in. Now his head is gassed and he thinks he can swim too far near the edge. The pool is not that child suitable for him to be doing all of that. Now the lil nigga thinks he’s an Olympic swimmer.

“Alright,” he said, the least bit interested in my words. I opened my mouth to say something but quickly closed it, realizing that he was having fun and I didn’t want to interrupt. With my glass of Hennessy in my hand, I trailed towards my chair and sat back down. My niggas were all huddled around the table and there were a few things I wanted to discuss with them. Although this was a vacation, to the guys, it was nothing too fancy or time for leisure. That’ll only happen when things have died down officially after some sort of altercation.

The only reason we’re not in New York is because it’s hot out there. I heard too many things before I left and coming out here was the best thing to do.

“So, what’s the plan for when we get back to the city?” Justin asked, itching to get his hand in some sort of action.

“Well, I talked to G before I left n’ shit and B’s family got detectives all over the case. Besides that, I haven’t heard much about the shit from the last time,” I started off. As concerned as I should be about the predicament I just put myself into, I really wasn’t. This isn’t anything that I’m new to and this is the type of situations I’m forced into regardless. If push comes to shove and I do actually have to serve time, as long as my nephew and sister are straight, I’m good. “So, don’t be surprised if a few of them niggas come out of the woodworks. I doubt any of us would have to worry ‘bout Ryan. That nigga is slacking and ain’t doing shit but don’t sleep on him either. However, you should keep an eye on B’s cousin, Xavier,”

“Xavier?” Brian mumbled. “He not from around here,”

“Naw, California nigga,” I said, looking over towards where Austin was at. “She knows the deal but she don’t want me coming at this nigga head either,”

“So? You made some type of deal with her?” Caiden asked.

“Not really but if he’s coming at me, I’m going to defend myself and my team. Fuck outta here,” I stated. Yeah, this is B’s cousin or whatever but at the end of the day, niggas are willing to go to the extreme and get grimy for their loved ones. “So, stay alert on that. Lonnie we need to keep an eye on,” I said, lowering my voice so Austin wouldn’t hear. Although I preferred to be honest with Austin about his flaky ass father, Justine wouldn’t approve of that. For the simple fact that Austin is her kid and whatever she decides to do with Austin is up to her entirely, I won’t infringe on that, but I will speak my mind like I do all the time. “You see, you got Dumb and Dumber with Ryan and Lonnie. If they were as smart as they could potentially be, Lonnie would have an epiphany and realize Ryan’s chick is missing and Ryan would connect this Kennedy persona to Bailey and realize I’m behind this all. Seems logical, right?” I questioned, earning nods from around the table. I paused and took a sip of my drink. “I found some shit on the USB that caught my attention but it’s not adding up, you know?” I murmured.

I was getting somewhere.

“Like what?” Caiden asked. August was present at the table as well, but he was relatively quiet. He’s usually quiet to begin with so I’m not surprised. This isn’t the type of shit he’s cut out for and he’s starting to realize it. After this shit is done with, I don’t want him having any part in this and I need Caiden to deliver that message to his younger brother. If August was my younger brother, there would be no way in hell he would be involved in something like this.

“The police report was on there and Lonnie’s version is different from Justine’s,” I said, noting the first thing that really caught my attention.

“From the night Austin was kidnapped?” Brian asked.

“Yeah,” I nodded. “Knowing that Lonnie won’t be of any use to us, I came up with a different plan that’ll save us from some shit,” I revealed. This is probably the most spontaneous I have ever been with plans and majority of the time, they’re well thought out with weeks of preparation and planning. Bailey being included in the mix was never the original plan and seeing as that it hasn’t been the best well thought out idea, what I came up with next in my opinion has no choice but to work. It’s just about how receptive Bailey will be about it. For the next twenty minutes, I went on to explain my idea and plan and of course I got many confused facial expressions and questions that led me to believe they were doubtful. “Look, it’s either y’all backing me up on this shit or not. Y’all my bros and shit but I don’t need y’all to validate anything I do. Support would be dope but if not, my mind is made up,” I grumbled.

I’ve been trying to dead this shit for the longest time and find some sort of closure within me about this very situation. I have a guilty conscious. Maybe if I was around more often and kept an eye on shit, what Austin endured wouldn’t happen and months later, I wouldn’t have to risk someone else’s life to get the job done. Pushing the chair back, I stood up and grabbed the towel for Austin to dry off with. “Aye, come inside, lil man. We finna order something to eat,” I said which automatically caught his attention.

“Fries and a burger?” he asked, grabbing the towel out my hand.

“Why not? You need a beer along with that too?” I chuckled, encouraging him to walk in front of me.

“For real?” he said excitedly.

“Not at all. I’m fucking with you,” I laughed. “Go change,”

He sucked his teeth lowly and ran back inside the Villa. Before I had the chance to follow suit, my name was being called causing me to come to an abrupt halt. “We had your back regardless, A. that wasn’t going to change,” Justin mumbled, standing tall and meeting me halfway. He held his hand out for a dap which I returned as a grin broke out on my face. One by one, they all got up to give me a dap and a brotherly hug.

“I knew all y’all niggas would have my back anyhow,” I chuckled.

“Yeah, yeah,” They dismissed.

“But aye, August. Let me talk to you real quick,” I said.

“Wassup?”

“Look, with the new change of plans, I need you to be blunt and confront B on what happened that night. I wasn’t there, I don’t know shit about it and I don’t care. But it’s up to you to be honest with her ‘cause she gon’ end up finding out rather quick,” I expressed, crossing my arms over my chest. The expression on his face was pretty calm but I knew better than that.

“I’ll tell her before we leave,” he mumbled, pulling his black shades up on his face.

“I’m holding you to it,” I stressed sternly, walking back inside the Villa.

“A’ight,” I don’t know how truthful August was being, but I was hoping he would fall in line and do what needs to be done. I trailed towards Austin’s room and sat at the edge of his bed, helping him tie his Air Jordan 5 shoelaces.

“Bailey’s birthday is tomorrow?” Austin spoke up.

“Yeah,” I nodded. “Why?”

“Did you get her a birthday gift?” he questioned, furrowing his eyebrows.

“Naw,” I shook my head. “Was I supposed to?” I questioned, placing his foot back down the floor.

He nodded his head quickly. “You bought mommy a birthday gift. You have to do the same for Bailey. I want to buy her something! I would draw but that’s a cheap gift,” he muttered causing me to laugh. I looked at the digital clock on the wall and took note of it being a little after three and the girls had yet to return. I wasn’t planning on buying anything for Bailey, but Austin seemed genuinely interested in doing so.

“Let’s eat first and then we’ll look around, okay?” I sighed.

“Deal,”

Bailey

When Justine and I came back home, the Villa was dead quiet. All lights were turned off which automatically gave away the fact that the boys had went out. I quietly made my way towards the back and into my room. After we ate, we decided to do a little more shopping. I was able to pick out an outfit for my birthday tomorrow, although Justine didn’t tell me what she had planned, I had a hunch a typical dinner would be involved in the mix somehow because I did overhear her talking on the phone, assuming she was talking to Adrian maybe. Placing the dress I bought for tomorrow on a hanger, I walked back out the room and began to unpack what was in some of the bags so I wouldn’t have to do it later. “Hey, Adrian just called. The boys should be back in thirty minutes or so,” Justine said, poking her head inside of the room. I nodded and dived into the big King size bed with a sigh.

“You okay?” she asked. “Something must be wrong,” Her face filled with concern. With the way Justine acts and how concerned she is about the littlest things, it’s evident and clear as to why she would want Lonnie around, but the only problem is her not realizing how much of a threat he actually is. I had to force myself not to speak up on what happened just a day ago with her ex, but Adrian advised me not to do that. If I do, she’d ask why I was with him in the first place and then I’d have to explain, and it’ll just end up being a mess I want to avoid until this trip is over.

“Why do you say that?” I asked, refusing to answer her inquiry.

“Your face. One minute you could be totally fine and the next, your whole mood drops,” she explained.

“Oh,” I mumbled. “My mind is in constant motion. Just thinking,” I shrugged.

“You wanna go home, don’t you?” she said. I bit my bottom lip and allowed a frustrated huff to pass my lips. I would be a liar if I said a part of me didn’t want to stay. But, I wouldn’t be telling the truth if I said I didn’t want to go home either. I was conflicted and it didn’t help that no matter what I chose, I would be fucked some sort of way. Without a doubt, I know my dad is aware and he’s either fuming with anger or… well, there is no or. He’s mad.

“I would but I don’t want to deal with the aftermath,” I said truthfully. I knew that as soon as I was thrown back home, I would be engulfed in a whirlwind of questions and everyone will feel the need to baby me or make sure there is extra protection around me. However, the one person I’m not excited to seeing or hearing from, oddly enough, would be my father. My dad is the least bit passive and will let you know in a heartbeat if he isn’t feeling something. Just because I’m his daughter does not mean he will possibly go easy on me. No matter what age I am, that wouldn’t matter to him because he’ll still get on my case like I’m eight.

“I’m so sorry,” she frowned.

“It’s okay,” I murmured, wishing I hadn’t spoken at all. Now, I had tears streaming down my face and I hadn’t bothered to remove it at all.

“Oh my gosh,” Justine panicked, quickly rushing to get a tissue for me. Before I had a chance to react and grab the tissue from Justine’s hand, Adrian was barging through the door. He stopped abruptly and stared between us, mystified.

“What happened?” he frowned.

“Nothing,” I spoke up before Justine could. That only caused Adrian to look at me with more intensity as he saw right through my lie. I turned to look away and rushed off towards the bathroom. I don’t know why I was crying, and I don’t know why I was letting my tears get the best of me. I sat on the edge of the bathtub and continued to sob, despite my efforts to stop. I felt like I’d be doing a lot of crying in the upcoming days, to be honest. Letting out a frustrated groan, I stood up and went to look at myself in the mirror. My eyes were a bit puffy but weren’t as red as I thought they’d be. Adrian’s arms trickled around my waist, pulling me back towards him.

“You good?” he asked.

“I’m fine,” I mumbled. “I’m just a little emotional,” I said, turning around in his grasp.

“I know. I see it in your face which is why I don’t want to tell you shit,” he grumbled.

“That doesn’t make me feel good,” I confessed, burying my face in his chest.

“I know what will,” he smirked mischievously.

_

(TPP)

Adrian and Bailey’s lips were locked together tightly as their hands roamed over one another’s body eagerly. They wasted no time attacking each other with their pent up frustration and it showed with how they were reacting towards one another. Bailey moaned into the kiss as his hands gripped her ass. They had moved from the bathroom with ease, over towards the bed. Bailey was straddling Adrian’s lap and grinded into his growing erection, all while managing to keep their swollen lips locked. “Take this shit off,” he groaned, referring to her romper.

“Take it off me,” Bailey said seductively, crawling off his lap and onto the bed.

“Don’t gotta tell me twice,” he said, hovering on top of her. His hand found the zipper on the size of her romper and zipped it down in a hurried fashion. Bailey slid out of the soft material with ease and now laid under him in a matching lace bra and panty set. Now that Bailey was halfway undressed, it was time for Adrian to be the same way. Bailey leaned up and tugged on the bottom of his grey shirt, wanting it off immediately. Once the shirt was dropped on the floor, Bailey gently grazed her acrylic nails against his chest before lowering them towards the hem of his shorts. His lips connected with the side of her neck, sucking roughly on her flesh while one of his hand trickled down her bare thigh towards her love. Bailey gasped, feeling him push the material of her panty to the side and pump one of his fingers inside of her moist center.

There was no way Adrian was going to allow for Bailey to get it easy right now. He was going to do things his way and she would have to take it. Bailey and Adrian’s eyes connected and an intense stare between the two ensued; Bailey finding herself unable to look away for just a split second, which was rare for her. As much she wanted to, she didn’t and she found herself becoming turned on by the intense eye contact while Adrian continued to pump his fingers in and out of her wetness. Removing his finger from her opening, he stared at the stickiness that now covered his finger and brought it towards Bailey’s mouth to lick off.

Her lips wrapped around his finger, slowly sucking off the juices. That action alone had Adrian mind wandering off into different directions and most importantly, different positions. Fuck, he thought. Bailey smirked, knowing that she got him there. In the blink of an eye, Adrian had torn her expensive lingerie off her body and left her completely exposed for only his eyes to see. Bailey tucked her bottom lip in her mouth, noticing the apparent boner in Adrian’s POLO boxers. Bailey took the initiative to tug down his boxers, revealing his harden dick. Bailey fell back on the bed, spreading her legs just a tad bit.

She was anticipating having him in the worst way. Adrian saw no point in foreplay since Bailey was wet already and Adrian’s dick was too hard to be patient. At the end of the day, she’ll get hers and he’ll get his. “Spread ‘em wide,” Adrian said huskily. It was then that he realized that his condoms were in his suitcase, but he didn’t feel the urge to stop and get them. I’ll just pull out, he thought to himself. The last thing he needed was a kid of his own and the one thing Bailey didn’t need to get caught up in was having a child with her ‘kidnapper’ as well. “You mind if I fuck you raw?” Adrian asked, wrapping B’s leg around him.

Bailey was conscious enough to know what was coming out of his mouth but too lost in ecstasy as Adrian rubbed the tip of his dick against her slit. At this point, she would agree to anything as long as Adrian fucked her good. Without much of a warning, Adrian pushed into her, causing her back to arch instantly and expletives to flee from her mouth one after the other. Adrian smirked, giving her long and hard strokes to her center. Bailey’s nails clawed at his skin as she tried to find his rhythm, so she could do the same thing back with just as much force. Eventually Bailey caught his pace and began to slowly grind her hips on him. “Fuck, Adrian,” she moaned, grasping a chunk of the sheets in her hand. Adrian decided to use his hands and push down on her lower stomach while he continued with the fast momentum of his strokes, making sure to hit all of her spots.

Bailey knew exactly what he was doing but she allowed for him to have her in the way he wanted. She was loving every bit of it and especially the fact that Adrian was just the right amount of rough. They weren’t making love, but they weren’t just fucking either. They shared a conscious connection with one another and although they didn’t speak on it much, they both understood it whether or not they wanted to admit it to one another. Adrian grabbed ahold of Bailey’s legs and pinned it against her chest, giving him more leverage to stroke her the way he desired.

“Shit,” Adrian grunted, feeling her walls contract around him. Bailey saw it all in his face and smirked.

Bailey pushed him back a bit and he caught the hint, still pumping in her but staring at her with a confused expression. A thin layer of sweat coated both of their skins’ and it would only get worse with the way these two were going at it. Getting just the right amount of energy, Bailey and Adrian changed positions and Bailey was now on top of him, slowly bucking her hips back and forth. Her hands rested on his chest as she used all her energy to turn him into her bitch. The look of pleasure was all over each of their faces and in a short while, they both would be pleased and satisfied as soon as they came.

Adrian grabbed Bailey’s neck, bringing her lips towards his. Their kisses were nothing short of aggressive and urgent as Bailey tugged on Adrian’s lip while managing to keep her pace up. She was on the brink of an orgasm and with the way she would grow progressively faster, showed just how much she wanted her orgasm to arrive. Adrian began to thrust upwards into her suddenly causing her to yelp out in loud moan. Her head titled backwards, and a slight O formed on her lips as she continued to move her body against Adrian’s powerful strokes. “Adriannnn!” Bailey moaned, loud enough for anyone in close proximity to hear.

Adrian slipped his hands between their two conjoined bodies and began to rub at her clit fast. That feeling in the pit of her stomach became more blatant and before Bailey could process anything, she had reached her climax; releasing all over Adrian. Now that Bailey got hers, Adrian was about to get his. “Goddamn,” Adrian groaned, bussing right after her. Both of them were breathing heavily, attempting to catch their breaths. Bailey felt weak as hell as she laid upon Adrian’s sweaty chest, letting what just happened between the two sink into her mind as well as Adrian’s. What the two of them didn’t realize in that moment was that Adrian didn’t pull out. Typical, huh?

Bailey knew something like this would happen but hoped that it wouldn’t but it did. Now, she would really have to take the pill. It took at least five minutes for them to regain their composure. Bailey sighed blissfully, placing a kiss on Adrian’s full lips after. Neither of the two had the energy to move and if they could, they would stay like this forever. “I need to take the pill,” Bailey said, exhausted to say that sentence alone.

Adrian’s eyebrows meshed together but he quickly found out why. “Alright,” he mumbled, tracing his hands down Bailey’s back towards her ass, cupping it roughly in his hands. “But before that, let’s take it to the shower for a minute,” he said, to which Bailey gladly obliged with. She had run out of energy but that didn’t mean she couldn’t go another round.

Bailey

For once, I was at peace.

No, it didn’t take sex for that to happen but it was a great release, literally.

After the amazing rounds of sex, I had got redressed into something more comfortable and made my way inside of Justine’s bedroom, asking her if she had any pills on her. Of course she embarrassed me about what she supposedly heard but I waved her off and limped back into the confines of Adrian and I’s bedroom, quickly swallowing the pill with the water Adrian got for me. Now we laid tangled up in the sheets, spilling the first thing that came to mind. Some of the things were random and other things actually held weight. Either way, we were content with talking about just about anything at this point. “I think I want another tattoo,” I confessed, staring straight ahead, towards the beautiful view of outside.

“Yeah? Like what and where?” Adrian asked, snaking his arms’ around my waist tighter. I smiled at the small gesture. He truly didn’t know much it meant to me. It definitely gave me that security that I lacked around Ryan and especially with my father being out of the picture for so long.

“I want angel wings… like what Caiden has but way smaller,” I said. “My mother and sister have them,” The only tattoo my mother would ever cosign for my younger sister. “And I want to do mine because I never got the chance to do so,” I knew Adrian already figured out why I wasn’t able to get mine but decided against speaking on it for both of our benefits. “And, I want it on my other wrist since this one already has something,” I said, holding out both of my wrist for him to see.

“We can make that happen, baby girl,” he said, closing his eyes a bit. My birthday was less than three hours away and with the way Adrian was talking, it seemed like he was willing to give me the moon and the stars. I ran my fingers along his neck gingerly, seeing that it put him at ease. “I got something I wanna tell you though,” he murmured into my exposed skin. I remained quiet, not saying anything and waiting for him to spill whatever was on his mind. “I want you to go back home,” His words’ made me tense as the movements of my fingers along his neck came to a sudden halt. Those were words I probably would have never heard him say but here we were, and those words indeed fell past his lips.

If this was two or three months ago, I would be jumping for joy to be able to finally leave. But my feelings towards Adrian, Justine, Austin and the boys have all changed. I no longer feel an ounce of resentment to them and I can sympathize with them. Going home would be me being thrown in the swing of things that I was currently unaware of. I missed out on a lot and I feel like I would only just stick out rather than being accepted with open arms. Of course, I want to see my family and friends but I don’t want to deal with the backlash that comes with it, if you know what I mean.

“What?” I mumbled. I heard correctly but I couldn’t believe it.

“I want you to go home after this trip is over,”

“Why?” I said, my voice barely above a whisper. Adrian sighed, refusing to look my way out of the numerous times we’ve had a conversation.

“I think it’s for the best,” he stated.

“And then what?!” I found myself growing frustrated within a few seconds.

“Aye, chill with all that shit, alright? Just listen to me,” he said. The way he was acting was way too nonchalant and carefree about this as if what he was about to do wouldn’t affect either of us.

“Look at me then,” I demanded, crossing my arms over my chest.

His head popped up and he stared at me through thin slits before quickly uncrossing my arms and holding them down at my sides. “Stop acting so defensive,” he gritted. “Hear me out or you won’t get any dick from me,” he said, purposely making me laugh at the grin on his face.

“I’m not even laughing because it’s not funny right now!” I said.

“Calm the fuck down, baby,” he said huskily, tucking his head in the corner of my neck. I knew what he was doing, and I wanted to stop that because there was no way he was going to evade this type of information from me.

“I’m listening,” I insisted, pinching his neck. His skin around the area pinched immediately turned a light shade of red.

“What the fuck!?” he roared.

“You’re lucky I didn’t bite your neck,” I said. “Now, tell me why I’m leaving?” I said bitterly.

“Look, you might not understand after I explain why, you just might or you don’t want to. But, with everything that’s been happening recently, I know when to step back and I know when to put you back in the line of safety. I can handle things from here on out, trust. However, there is one tiny thing I have in mind and it’s totally up to you,” he said, waiting for me to acknowledge that I heard him but instead, it was returned with a blank face as I waited for him to elaborate before I spoke up. With a sigh, he said, “You know how Ryan is supposedly looking for you?” I gave off an indifferent shrug. Sure he was. “Well, let’s play him at his own game. Only difference, no one gets hurt in this scenario unless I have a change of heart,”

“What do you mean play him at his own game?” I inquired, my eyebrows furrowing together. If this was a revenge for revenge type of situation, I’m not too sure on this.

“He has this idea in his head that he’s closer to you than what he actually is. Let’s act like he is and essentially, make it easy on him. Give him what he wants and make it seem like his job is done but realistically, it’s just beginning. I’ll play the part and act like I’m surrendering, you feel? I’m still determined to find out what happened because it’s not sitting well with me and I have this sort of-“

“Guilty conscience?” I said, cutting him off. He cut his eyes at me again before slowly nodding. “Hm, that’s your superego speaking,”

“Is this ‘bout to turn into a paid session?” he asked sarcastically.

“Only if you want it to,” I said, kissing his lips.

“Naw, you do enough with picking my mind even when I don’t ask for it,” he grumbled. “But back to the focus, girl. So, is you down or what?”

“What exactly would I be doing now?” I questioned. “How would this work?”

“Take it like this, you’re free. You’re free to do as you please and leave the house to go back to your real life. Work with your ex Ryan and basically act like a con artist against him. Butter him up to get information that I need because at the end of the day, trust, he’ll say whatever the fuck you want him to tell you, especially knowing your predicament. This is the only plan where I can get immediate answers ‘cause Ryan not tryna talk to me and I’m going to leave Lonnie alone for a bit,”

“And then I tell you what he said?” He nodded. “I don’t know…” I trailed off. Although I would be happy to be home, the last person I’m willing to have any sort of acknowledgment with is Ryan. I don’t want to look at him, talk to him or even breathe the same air. I don’t hate him, but I don’t like him either and there has definitely been a distaste for him on my part. “Like what if he expects more than what I’m willing to give? How will my family respond if they know I’m helping you? Adriannnn!” I whined. “I don’t want to go,” His eyebrows rose at my true statement. I was conflicted; I don’t know what to do. “What happened to me staying if I chose to?”

“It’s still valid. Why would you want to stay though… out of all people with me?” he laughed lightly.

“I just… I’m not too sure right now,” I mumbled. I needed to think about this some more. Bottom line, Adrian wanted me to ‘work’ with Ryan to get immediate answers since Lonnie was out of the picture. If I was going to essentially play Ryan at his own game, I would actually have to play the part to fool Ryan. I don’t think Ryan’s dumb or maybe he is but running back into his arms’ all of a sudden seems like playing with fire. Not knowing if Ryan intentions are honest, I don’t know how safe I would be near him or if my mother would even allow that to happen.

“You trust me?” Adrian said, breaking me out of my thoughts. The last time I said I didn’t, he made me kill someone. But as far as knowing his intentions, it’s way better than what Ryan could possibly offer.

Willingly, I mumbled a low, “Yes,”

“What was that? I don’t think I heard correctly?” he said, hovering on top of me again, resting his weight on his knuckles.

“I do but you be putting me in risky ass situations,” I blurted.

“Not anymore, alright?” he promised.

“Fine, I’ll do it,” I huffed, locking my arms around his neck tightly. “That means I have to live with him?”

“Stay in my condo in Tribeca; I’ll be there if you want me to,”

I smiled lightly. “You’re cute,”

“Oh, now I’m cute? ‘Bout a month ago you were speaking a different language,”

“’Cause, you started to actually show me what you’re about,” I chuckled. He stared at me longingly, a genuine smile plastered on his face. It was without a doubt true that everyone had two sides and Adrian was no exception. His genuine side overweighs everything negative about him. That might be a bold statement but it’s exactly how I feel. Although I don’t like to compare Adrian to Ryan, there was obvious traits about the two that were different and what stood out exactly is how genuine Adrian is. Let’s be clear, Adrian doesn’t speak on his feelings but rather, he shows them which speaks way more than he ever will. Ryan on the other hand, spoke with his words but his words weren’t enough for me, I needed more, and he couldn’t give that to me. I’m not even officially with Adrian but yet, he’s done way more, at least in my opinion.

“I’m glad you see that,” he said. “I do care about you, oddly enough,” A grin broke out on my face. “But I don’t want to hurt you because I’m already doing that,” And it’s sad because I know that already.

Things were gearing up to change pretty quickly.

[floralseokjin]

it’s christmas eve and you and Namjoon are about to partake in some peculiar roleplay...

pairing | kim namjoon x reader genre/warnings |  smut, santa! namjoon, SANTA ROLEPLAY (honestly if you’re not into it then don’t read bc getting freaky with santa isn’t everyone’s cup of tea), dirty talk, kinda cracky, kinda fluffy?? etc etc words | 6,159

author’s note | look who couldn’t stay away for long. This is the result of a sex dream I had about a *cough cough* REAL person I KNOW, and I really needed to vent and write this out, so here we are! I want to thank Ave for sending me that grinch santa porn, my curiosity probably stemmed from there!! But OBVIOUSLY namjoon isn’t dressed up as the grinch……that would just be weird, right? Right??? Also, Amy this one is for you!! I was thinking of you when I wrote the mistletoe in!! ENJOY, EVERYONE….maybe…../sweats profusely/

“Oh, my god…”

Your voice is little but a gasp, taking in your boyfriend’s physique as he stands by the edge of the bed. He’s dressed like Santa Claus—albeit minus the round belly, white beard and rosy cheeks. He’s dressed in red pants and a gown, no shirt underneath so his bronzed chest is noticeable to your ever wondering eye. His hat is placed askew on his head, brown hair tousled underneath. He looks good, something you never thought you’d say, but…it was your idea after all.

Namjoon had been a little dubious at first, unsure if this time your curiosity in roleplay had peaked and gone overboard. It would be a great Christmas present you had told him, much cheaper than the expensive perfume you’d wanted…

“But why would Father Christmas be visiting a woman in her mid-twenties?” He’d asked, ever the logical.

“It’s roleplay, Namjoon,” you’d sighed. “It’s not real, there for Father Christmas can visit a grown ass woman on Christmas Eve and fuck her!”

At the word fuck, his ears had perked up—you were sure he was a fifteen-year boy going through puberty at heart—and with one last “please, baby,” a pout on your face, he was all yours, putty in your hands.

“I feel like I should have gone with a beard…” he says now, still stood in front of you, massaging his jaw between his thumb and forefinger.

“No, babe,” you shake your head, “that would’ve been too itchy.”

“I would’ve taken it off!” He insists, and you’re shocked he seems so passionate about this…Maybe he is just as excited as you… You mean, when it came to sex Namjoon is always so easily pleased. This would be no different, you know it.

“That wouldn’t have been very authentic,” you tell him, pushing yourself back, your back propped up against the million and one pillows you had on the bed you shared.

“So is a Santa without a beard, period…oh wait…” he adds, feigning clarity, eyeballing you sceptically.

“Just shush, stop being so clever,” you rebuke him with your hand. You knew this idea isn’t very realistic. It’s make believe, it is supposed to be a bit of fun!

“Do you want to fuck me or not?” You ask, and take great delight when he nods immediately, back straight. “Then go outside the door. Come in after a couple of minutes,” you tell him, getting excited now. This was finally happening, and you watch him pick his red sack up—something he’d insisted on having with him. (Apparently it had your gifts in for the next day, which told you he is definitely into this more than he let on…).

“You need to catch me about to masturbate—and remember! No snapping out of character—No laughing either,” you add, voice stern.

You knew Namjoon like the back of your hand, and staying in character during one of your…extracurricular activities, shall you say, was almost impossible for him to do.

“I’ve got it,” he nods, face serious, as if he is psyching himself up, and you watch as he opens the door and bids you farewell. “See you in a bit, baby.”

He closes the door and you’re alone, probably only for a moment and you waste no time in spreading your legs, feet planted firmly to the bed. You’re in the skimpiest pyjama set you own, a strappy shirt and tiny shorts, no underwear underneath, and the draft between your legs floods you with a shock of pleasure. You aren’t going to really touch yourself, wanting to wait until Namjoon’s here, ready to do it for you, but you place your hand over the fabric, the pressure against your mound bracing you for the next hour or so… You take a breath, and then the door’s opening, Father Christmas barging through with his sack over his shoulder.

“Ho, ho, ho,” he bellows, in the deepest, jolliest voice he can muster, and your eyes widen.  “What do we have here?”

You can’t help it. You burst out laughing, so violently you snort, tears appearing in the corners of your eyes.

“Babe!” He exclaims, like a petulant child, Namjoon well and truly back in the bedroom.  “You said no laughing!”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” you apologise, trying to stifle your giggles, hand over your mouth. “Your voice just sounded really funny. Please use your own…”

It’s your own fault, you hadn’t specified that, you guess, and just imagining Namjoon using that voice all night made you cringe, wanting to burst into laughter all over again.

“Fine,” he huffs, hoiking the sack over his shoulder again, before swinging the door open. “I’ll be back in one.”

You nod, settling back on the bed as you dry your eyes, taking another deep breath as you slide your hand down your body again, waiting for your boyfriend—waiting for Santa.

“Ho, ho, ho,” he bursts in again, and this time you get into character, your hand flying to your mouth in feigned shock as he walks in and dumps his sack at the end of the bed.

“What do we have here? Isn’t everyone supposed to be asleep on Christmas Eve?”

“Santa?” You gasp, getting up on your knees to view him. “Is that really you?”

The name rolls off your lips semi-naturally, and there’s a moment of question—are you really doing this right now? But quite frankly, with Namjoon, anything is fun, especially some holiday filled naughty time. It’s fun, and different, and if you can’t act a fool in front of the man you love, who can you act a fool in front of?!

“It is,” he nods, eyes skimming down your cleavage, and you make sure to push up with your arms a little, accentuating the swell.

“Are you sure you’re the real one?” You accuse, tone innocent, but eyes accusing. You want to have some fun with him. Just to see how he acts put on the spot. “Isn’t he supposed to have a beard?”

His face turns stoic for a moment, gaze hard as he tenses his jaw and replies. “If I’m not in the North Pole there’s no point. It’s not as cold here…” he shakes his head as you try your best to hide your smirk. “Now, where were we…?” He asks, changing the subject.

You oblige, peaking over the edge of the bed, tone saccharine. “Are those my presents?”

“Nuh-uh,” he refuses, pulling the sack behind him. “Only good girls can have their presents. You weren’t asleep.”

“I am a good girl,” you pout, looking up at him with doe-like eyes. Seeing Namjoon so into his role only fuels you more, and you are not able to drag this out too long. “I was just distracted.”

“With what?” Santa asks, cocking an eyebrow.

“I’m frustrated, Santa,” you pout some more, tone dejected as you channelled your best inner Hollywood actress.

“Frustrated?” He repeats, moving closer to you, and you nod adamantly. “Why don’t you come and sit on Santa’s lap and tell me all about it…?”

The thrill that shoots through your body is like a couple dozen tiny electric shocks, and you nod animatedly, a shy ‘okay’ falling under your breath as you watch him move.

“Okay,” he repeats, just as pleased, and he takes a seat on the side of the bed, the mattress dipping around your knees with his weight, just like your abdomen right this instant. He raises his arms out, beckoning you to come forward and he looks ever so inviting. His body is warm as you sit on his lap and he wraps his arms around your waist, hugging you to him as you shift your torso to face him.

“So…what is the problem?” He asks, curiously innocent. All real, because he has no clue where you’re going with this.

You hit him with it straight away, because you’re horny and you have no patience, but you make sure to sound as innocent as you possibly can when the confession falls from your mouth.

“I just…haven’t been able to have an orgasm in a while.”

Namjoon’s eyes widen and you don’t know whether to count that as a break of character or not, but as soon as it happens, it’s gone and then he’s back. “An orgasm?!” He exclaims, mouth curling up as he dares to ruin this again.  “Ho, ho, ho, how come?”

Ho, ho, ho. Maybe you really should have thought of some ground rules before you’d started. Santa’s jolly laugh is not something you want to hear while Namjoon rails you into practically the New Year. So, you play him at his own game.

“Santa, it’s my boyfriend,” you pout, eyes innocent again. “He doesn’t know how to fuck me properly.”

This time Namjoon’s jaw falls slack as he stares at you, a smirk itching on your face now, before his gaze turns determined, arms wrapping tighter around you, encaging your body against—diminutive in Santa’s lap.

“I’m sure he does,” he insists, eyes narrowed, accusing. “Maybe you’re just a bad girl who can’t find a man good enough for her—Greedy.”

You gasp, all for play, because you’re loving how into this Namjoon is. You’ve never seen him like this before and it’s turning you on. “I’m not greedy!”

He nods. “And spoilt,” pointing his head to look at the sack on the floor. “Your bag of presents is the heaviest tonight.”

“Santa,” you whine, nuzzling up to him. “I’m not spoilt. I just want someone to make me cum good.”

You hear Namjoon’s breath catch, shaky inhale broken at your line, and you hide your smirk in his chest, purposely wriggling your ass over his crotch, feeling the tell-tale signs of his erection.

“Santa…” you breathe. “What can I feel? What is it?”

“Oh…that…” he replies, body stiffening before he’s gripping your chin, angling your face level with his as he descends.  “Your filthy words have gotten to Santa. You’re corrupted, and now you’ve corrupted me,” he smirks, and a thrill of pleasure shoots down to your core, unable to take your eyes off him, hanging off every word. “You’re a bad girl, and bad girl’s need to be punished.”

“What do you suggest, Santa?” You ask innocently.

Santa puts you at arms length. “Has your boyfriend ever spanked you before?”

Your stomach begins to do crazy flips, your heart jackhammering against your chest. You shake your head, maybe finding yourself falling out of character. No, Namjoon has never spanked you. Well, maybe during sex a little, but something tells you that’s not what he has planned for you now…

“Good,” he smirks. “Now lay over my knees, and I can promise I’ll make you a good girl again.”

You get to it, jumping up excitedly as Santa spreads his legs a tad, inviting you, and you do as you’re told, laying belly down over his thick thighs, gripping the edge of the bed.

“Will you spank all the badness out of me, Santa?” You ask, twisting your head with a smirk, and he nods determinedly.

“That I will.  Now count as I go,” he commands you, hand reaching down to stroke the flesh of your ass, fabric unable to hide your most delicate of areas; you’re sure he can see peaks of your vagina from his position.  

“Okay, Santa—argh.” You’re interrupted when he already slams his palm down to the centre of your cheeks, and you grit your teeth, the burn stinging your eyes. “One.”

“What was that?” He presses, smoothing the skin gently, but his tone is still threatening.

“One, Santa,” you correct, clenching your eyes closed when he spanks you again.  “Two, Santa.”

This carries on a couple more times until his hand slid under the crotch of your shorts, large hands pulling apart the flesh, moulding it in his palms, before two of his fingers trace the outline of your sensitive lips.

“Where’s your underwear?” He questions, a demand, but a curious one at that.

“I-I don’t have any,” you stutter out, body trembling with want.

“You don’t?” He repeats, lightly spanking your bare flesh now and you gasp. “You’re too filthy, beyond my help,” he informs you, causing you to moan involuntary.

Your body is taut, stiff over him, unable to even breath as you wait his next move. You get it alright. His fingers dipping to your needy hole, as he soaks them in your arousal. You whimper, unable to stop yourself from bucking into the sensation.

He scoffs. “Why are you enjoying this? Wet?! Feel it, it’s running down your legs,” he says, rubbing his digits against the inside of your thighs, dirtying your body with your own sticky juices. You twitch at the sensation.

“Santa, please,” you plead. “Do something else. I beg you! Maybe you have to do more to get the badness out of me?”

You’re desperate and you need him to touch you more. You need him to do something, anything, just to rid the tension that renders your body powerless.

“Up,” he orders suddenly, and you listen instantly, legs shaky as you stand before him. He sits up straighter, judging you, brow line creased. “Look at you, a mess!”

That much is true, you play up to the role, shunning at his words while secretly loving it—it ignites a need so deep in you, you feel more than alive. Your thighs rubbing against one another as you try to cease the burn between them. Your cheeks rosy from the effect of his spanks. Your ass still tingling with pain and pleasure. Your stomach jolts when you see Namjoon stand up.

“Where’s your boyfriend tonight? He can’t help you?” He asks, head tilted, now stood directly in front of you as you look up.

“He’s not here. He left me for Christmas…and besides…I know you could pleasure me better, Santa,” you grin, lowering your tone, battering your eyelashes up at him, ever so demure as you try your best to get him to fuck you.

“How do you know that?” He cocks an eyebrow.

“Your dick, it felt big, and thick, and I know it would feel so good stuffed inside my pussy.”

You’re not playing around anymore, and you watch as Namjoon gulps loudly, his eyelids fluttering closed for a moment as he collects himself. When he opens them again, his eyes are dark, enough to almost make you cower.

“You tempt Santa,” he practically growls.

“Good,” you quip smugly, standing your ground. “I want Santa to fuck me. I know he’s the only man up to the job.”

“The only woman I fuck is Mrs. Claus…” he tells you, and you balk for a moment, the need to laugh or scold Namjoon beyond high. Why did he ever think that would be sexy? You widen your eyes a little instead, silently telling him really, before he stalls, realising his mistake.

“But,” he coughs, clearing his throat, backtracking immediately. “I’m sure what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her.”

With that he’s closing the gap between you, his hand gently brushing through your hair, admiring you, and your mouth parts, a silent sigh leaving you as you seem unable to tear your eyes from him.

“You are beautiful, does your boyfriend ever tell you that?” He murmurs, and for a moment your heart swells happily inside your chest.

“He tells me that a lot,” you smile genuinely, catching eyes and he matches it.

“And so he should,” he nods, clearing his throat once again, before he’s back in character.

With dark eyes his gaze falls down to your chest, soaking in the view of your cleavage. He lifts his hand, dragging his finger down the opening until he begins to pop your buttons loose. Finally the garment falls open, revealing your bare form. His hands instantly reach to play with your breasts, weighing them with his palms, thumbs flicking against the nipples.

“Ah, such perky tits. It’s been a long time since I saw them like this,” he says wistfully, and you stifle a giggle, choosing to ignore his try at humour.

“Maybe you should taste one…?” You tempt.

“I’d love to,” he smirks, dipping his hand to engulf one of your sensitive buds in his mouth, tongue flicking skilfully, causing you to shudder, pliable in his hold as he grips your hips. “You really are so horny,” he muses, pulling away.

“I’m just excited for Santa to fuck me,” you silk, fluttering your eyelashes again.

“Hm…” he contemplates, thinking things through. “First, you have to do something for Santa.”

“Anything,” you appease.

You watch as he moves back to the bed, sitting down at the head, getting himself comfy against the pillows. “Come here,” he motions with his hand, and you immediately clamber on the mattress, kneeling up straight before him. “Take that off,” he points to your shirt, “and touch them for me.”

You waste no time, freeing yourself of the clothing and you begin by cupping the soft flesh of your right breast, pushing it up slowly, trying to act as seductive as you could. It works of course, Namjoon can’t resist you, he’s never been able to. You watch as his hand trails down to his dick, gripping it over the cloth of his red trousers. He grunts, gaze intense as he watches you.

“Are you enjoying this, Santa?” You ask sweetly.

“Ho, ho, ho, yes,” he grins, and you ignore the need to roll your eyes. It seems he loves that one phrase… You’ll let him have it.

You move closer up the bed, he spreads his legs so you can fit in, your arm reaching out to run a hand down his semi-revealed chest… His skin is warm and hard, and you can’t help it, you need to untie him, bringing both hands to his middle as you fight with the knot. Once his chest is fully bare, you soak it in, practically drooling.

“Do you want me to do anything else?” You purr, watching him through half-lidded eyes.

“How about getting your mouth around that big, thick dick you so badly need,” he groans, breath hot against your face.

“My pleasure,” you grin, akin to a cheshire cat.

You descend quickly, desperately trying to free him of his slacks as he lifts his hips up. You’re pleasantly surprised when you see he too, isn’t wearing any underwear, pulling his thick member free…only for your eyes to land on something puzzling—

“Oh, my god,” you gasp quietly, eyeballing the tiny felt mistletoe that is tied around the base of his dick, unable to hold onto the act. “Namjoon!”

He looks down too, a sigh of relief leaving his lungs. “Shit, I am so glad that worked out,” he admits, and you roll your eyes. What would he have done if he’d tied the string too tight?! You wouldn’t have driven him to the emergency room when the cord had cut of the circulation to his extremely engorged member!

“Sorry,” he apologises, seeing the look on your face, and he runs his fingers through your hair.  “C’mon let’s keep going.”

You stall for a moment, but come to, shaking your head in amusement as you dip back down, before taking a deep breath, getting back in the zone. You feel him shudder above you as you open your mouth, hot breath tingling against the head of his cock. You jut your tongue out, letting the tip lick a strip up his sensitive flesh, and he groans, patient enough to keep his hips planted to the bed. You continue like this, leisurely tasting him, eyes flickering to his face every now and then, watching for reactions.

“It’s not a popsicle, baby girl, it won’t give you brain freeze. Shove it all in your mouth,” he grunts, voice hoarse, as if he’s forgetting to breathe.

You’re sent into a tailspin, wanting just to pleasure him, determined as you take him into your mouth, resting him against your warm, wet tongue as you begin to drag back and forth.

“Mmhm—fuck,” he hisses, intake of breath sharp, and this time he can’t help but to rock his hips, following your motion, working himself further into your mouth.

“You really know how to pleasure Santa Claus, hm?” He asks lowly.

You hum around his dick, sucking loudly before pulling away. “I want to make Santa feel good,” you glee, your chin wet with your own saliva, before you’re back on him, needing more.

This time you keep eye contact, watching each crease in his reaction, expression twisted as you keep on pleasuring him, his torso tense, thigh muscles twitching, as you work him to the point of oblivion, tongue lapping at the underside of his cock. Low moans fall from his throat, mouth open as he watches you intensely, and then suddenly his eyes close, and he’s twisting away from you, whining a little.

“Fuck, fuck, baby, sto—Ho, ho, ho,” he interrupts himself, realising he was falling out of character just in time.

You raise back on your knees, watching him curiously. He looks a mess, hands shaking, cheeks round and red.

“Let Santa return the favour now. I want to see what’s underneath those tiny shorts of yours…” He murmurs, voice just as affected.

You squeal in delight, bouncing down on your back as he clambers on top of you. You spread your legs, the draft flying up the gaps of your shorts, and he wastes no time in kissing down your stomach, tongue tracing shapes into the hot flesh. You feel a finger dip into your shorts, lightly brushing against your folds and you whimper, arching your back into him.

“So wet for Santa,” he husks, against your skin, chin against your waistband, and your heart drums like a hummingbird when you feel him begin to drag them down.

He gasps when he pulls back and sees how wet you are, discarding the garment as he drops it to the floor. You know you’re soaked, you can feel the sticky arousal collecting at your entrance, and Namjoon has barely touched you. You’re desperate for him; it swells his ego, you can tell by the smirk on his face.

“Did you know I was coming? Was this your plan all along?” He asks darkly.

“Maybe,” you tease coyly, spreading your legs even wider now, one of your feet pressing down on his shoulder to pull him between your thighs.

He obeys, getting comfy on his stomach as he winds his arms under your thighs, locking you in place. He blows cool air against your swollen, needy clit and you cry out, desperate beyond relief.

“What do you want me to do? You have to tell Santa, otherwise he won’t know…” he murmurs lowly. You can feel every syllable against your drenched core. It turns you on even more.

“I want Santa to eat me out,” you beg, to which he chuckles.

He does. Slowly, pressure barely there, and if anything, it drives you even wilder. When he begins flicking the tip of his tongue against your hardened clit you groan, almost inhumanly. It rips from your chest, body contorted, as he shoves his face against your heat, bare skin rubbing against soft, wet folds.

“Y’know,” you manage to get out, panting loudly. “I kinda wish you kept your beard. I would’ve loved to feel it against my pussy, Santa.”

“F-fuck,” He mutters, and you don’t miss the way he ruts into the mattress, desperate for some type of relief too.  “You’re such a dirty girl. Does your boyfriend know?”

“I think I’m too dirty for him,” you admit, feigning disappointment.

“Never,” he insists resolutely, shaking his head.

You grin, because he’s correct. Sometimes you truly think you and Namjoon were meant to meet. He gets you so well, and you get him. You mean, who else would dress up as Santa just to appease your weird mind?

You moan quietly, almost a gargle in your throat when his tongue falls to your hole, encircling loops around the delicate, sweet flesh, and you feel like you could cry. The pleasure so divine you feel like you’re floating, and as soon as he moves up again, mouth wrapped around your clit, you feel it. That need to come. It gnaws at you, aches at you, moans getting faster and louder. It’s happening, it’s almost there, and then—

You cry out when Santa pulls back, head falling back against the pillows in frustration.

“What’s wrong, baby?” He asks innocently.

“I wanted to cum,” you whine pathetically, voice small. “You were supposed to let me cum.”

You should have written that in your non-existent ground rules too…

“Don’t worry, baby girl,” he grins, sitting up and crawling between your legs.  “You’ll be cumming very soon—in fact,” he smirks, mouth inches from yours, “you’ll probably be begging me to stop in the end.”

He’s getting cocky. Santa’s getting cocky, and you can’t be having that. You sit up straighter, watching his mouth obviously, he notices and his eyes flicker over your face, now nervous, unsure of what you’re planning. In less than five seconds you have him under you, straddling his lap as you face one another.

“Santa,” you whisper seductively, holding onto his gown, eyes wide as you silently beg him for release. As you silently beg him to fuck you.

“You look so innocent, but you’re not, right?” He murmurs, hands in your hair again before he cups your cheek and you nuzzle into his palm, smirking widely as you grind your hips over him, feeling his hard cock wedged between your bodies. “Hm?” He hums, biting down on his bottom lip. “You wanna ride Santa’s cock?”

You nod rapidly. “I wanna feel you fill me up so bad.”

“But how will I be able to fuck you good if I’m not in charge?” He feigns puzzlement. “Santa wants you on your knees,” he grins out, and your belly starts doing flips.

You’re listening immediately, flipping off him to scurry on your knees, palms holding your body up as your arms shake in anticipation. Especially when you hear him behind you, mattress shifting under his weight as he bends down and inspects between your legs.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he mutters under his breath, and you jump when you feel two of his fingers spread apart your lips, giving him full view of the swollen, soaked interior.  “Everything’s so wet,” he awes, before crawling up again, large hands clutching down on your behind. “Your ass,” he practically growls, “still red from all that spanking…”

You moan, jutting your body into him, feeling his length rub against your thighs; it’s still wet from your saliva and it sticks to your skin, painting it with invisible shiny trails.

“Please, Santa,” you whimper. “Please fuck me. I’m desperate, and frustrated and I need you to stick that thick cock inside me now before I cry.”

You’re really playing up now, the role taking over you as you pout, head buried into the pillows, whining like a brat, until he spanks you again, and you gasp, jutting forward with the force.

“Well, how I can refuse,” you hear him smirk, rubbing the pained flesh with his palm, and you coax back into his hold, bracing yourself for his cock. He’s rubbing it against your folds now, prepping you, teasing you...

“Do you want it inch by inch, or do you want me to thrust inside that cunt all the way,” he growls, pausing, pressed right up against your dribbling entrance.

“Shit,” you huff under your breath, physically having to strain just to hold yourself up. “All the way, all the way,” you repeat messily, face screwed up as you prepare yourself fully now.

“My pleasure,” he glees, wishing you Merry Christmas as he drives right into you. It would have been comical if you weren’t so overcome with pleasure, gasping for breath as your eyes roll back inside your skull.

“Oh, fuck,” you manage to get out, back arching.  “Santa, you feel so good.”

“So do you,” he grunts, beginning to move, rocking his hips experimentally at first, getting used to the feeling, before he begins snapping them into you harder, skin slapping on skin, and you can’t help but moan loudly, tears pricking at the corner of your eyes, because you’ve been waiting so goddamn long for this…

“Fuck, you take Santa’s cock so well. You didn’t even need a warm up,” he groans, hands clamping around your hips.

“Mmm,” you moan, more incoherent noises leaving you as he pounds inside your durable heat. “Shit, keep going,” you pant, desperate for more, shifting your weight as you slip down.

He’s fucking you at lightning speed, his primitive urge fighting to the forefront of his mind as he grunts loudly, but still you need more. It’s all you can think. He’s all you need, and yet, you can never get enough. He’s addictive.

“Please, Santa, fuck me harder,” you cry out, head thrown back, hair cascading down your back.

“Harder?” He chuckles darkly. “Naughty girls aren’t allowed to make demands…”

“Please,” you beg, unbridled pleasure taking over your body, and you don’t care if your whimpering sounds pathetic. “I need more.”

He hums then, the deep sound rumbling through your body as he grips your ass cheeks. “Okay, but remember, you asked for it,” he warns, and then he’s spearing into, your whole body set alight as it shines with perspiration, yelling into the room as you’re jostled about.

He spreads your cheeks apart, making you gasp out, the line between pain and pleasure thin as he fucks you without relief. You’re on fire, burning from the inside out as you’re taken to another haven, one where pleasure controls your every move, every thought, every belief.

“Look at that pretty ass. It’s so temping…” he grunts, his thumb falling into the crack of your behind, and you give up fighting, head tumbling down into your pile of pillows, groaning like an animal, and then you slip up…

“Fuck, Namjoon—”

“Who’s that? Your boyfriend?” He interrupts through sharp intakes of breath, as he just. Keeps. On. Pounding. “Why are you thinking of him as Santa fucks you? Feeling guilty?” He taunts.

“I could never feel guilty while you’re inside of me,” you cry.

“Such a naughty girl…” He husks, a hand falling under your body, dangerously close to where you crave him a little, but he stops, as if he knows. As if he’s teasing you…

“Please, Santa, touch me,” you begin again, begging, your new favourite thing to do.  “I want to cum around your dick. Make me remember what an orgasm feels like.”

“You want my hands on you?” He asks, playing dumb and you nod as best you can when your head is already jiggling around like crazy.

As soon as his thumb reaches your clit you whimper, divine like pleasure hurtling through your veins. You’re so needy, he could probably pinch your clit and you’d explode, but instead, he rubs, encircling your hard bundle of nerves with the pad of his thumb.  

“Look how swollen you are, so fucking desperate for release…” he belittles, and you only grow hornier.

“Please,” you whine, but he’s already giving you everything, and you feel it. It’s finally time. It calls at you, holds you, drags you down into the centre of the screwed-up coil, before it pushes you back out again, exploding everywhere.

“Oh god, I’m coming! I’m really coming, please don’t stop,” you plea, rushed and high pitched, as Namjoon fucks you through your release.

And he keeps on going, even after you’re panting, thighs trembling, hair stuck to your forehead, body weak. He keeps on ramming into you at full force, and it’s so intense, you’re only filled with new life. He removes his hand, placing it at the small of your back as he steers your hips firmly, clamping you down, so now each thrust is more powerful, more determined than the last.

“Remember what I said? You’ll be begging Santa to stop soon,” he reminds you, taunting you.

But he’s wrong.

“A-ah, never!” You cry, arching your back into him. He could fuck you all night, you don’t care.

He chuckles, amused, but pleasantly surprised, thrusts losing momentum for a moment, as he adds, “maybe next year I can pay a visit again, and you’ll let me fuck that tight ass of yours.”

His words shoot through you, piercing your flesh like a thousand tiny knives. “Oh, fuck,” you groan, hiding your face as you gasp for oxygen. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

He slaps your ass as he scolds you. “Such a dirty mouth…”

“Santa,” you grunt, voice muffled against the fluffy pillows. “I’d let you do anything to me.”

“Good to know,” you hear him shrug, and with that, he’s fucking you faster, as if he’s chasing his end now.

You must be tighter around him now, maybe even drying up with your past orgasm and excessive humping from Namjoon. The friction must be a killer for him, and you don’t understand how he’s lasted this long. But it still feels oh, so good for you. You can’t get enough, and now you can’t stop imagining him inside your ass too. It’s enough to light that match again, and to your surprise, you feel the familiar urge tearing at your lower abdomen.

“I’m—I-I’m—” you try to get out, words failing you because the pleasure is too much. You’re coming too soon after your last, and this only means it will be ten times more powerful.

“What was that?” He presses on, but he knows. Of course he does.

“I’m honestly going to cum again,” you blurt out with one long breath, and that’s all he needs to hear before he’s unravelling too.

“Fuck, baby, fuck,” he moans, losing his character.  “I can feel you squeezing around my dick like a vice—It’s gonna drop off—Cum for me,” he commands, or is he begging? You can’t tell, you can’t even think straight, both your throes of pleasure blurring into one, moans blending into one another, as he furiously thrusts into your now-raw vagina.  

“Cum for Santa, show him you’re a good girl, and maybe he’ll give you those presents…” He grits out, and it’s working. You’re coming—again. His attack on your g-spot proving too much.

“Namjoon,” you sob, holding your breath as your orgasm tears through you.

“I’m gonna cum too,” he rushes, skin slapping on skin louder than ever now. “Fill you up so deep that you won’t forget me.”

“Do it, Santa!” You pant, breathing erratic, as you fight for air.

He rams in you one more time before he freezes altogether, a pause, a groan, before streams of his cum are shooting deep inside you. He doesn’t move, he doesn’t breathe, just keeps his dick lodged inside your hot walls, desperate to get his arousal so far into you, you won’t be able to feel it.

When he does pull out, it’s slowly and strategically, one hand gripping an ass cheek to hold you in place, delayed grunts from him, shortness of breath, and quiet whimpers from you, even more so when you feel the emptiness he leaves you with. You’d have Namjoon in you forever if you could.

You feel the mattress dip as he crouches down again, and when he speaks you hear his voice between your legs. “Clench that pussy for me,” he asks, and you obey, desperate to keep all that come in you, because you know what’s coming next…  

“Then squeeze, I wanna see it trickle out.”

“Of course, Santa,” you manage to grin, tone saccharine again, because you know this is the last time you’ll get to use the word—well, for this year anyway.

You squeeze once, twice—a third time, before you feel the hot, runny liquid dribble out of you and congeal in the air, stuck to your swollen folds.

“Fuck yeah,” Namjoon awes, taking in the sight he loves so much. He loves knowing you’re his.

He shifts again, kneeling straighter, and you turn your head, desperate to see his face. He looks up at you, and instantly his gaze softens, a small ‘baby’ leaving him before he’s spinning you around, back landing on the soft mattress and he falls on you, kissing your mouth lovingly.

“Namjoon,” you breathe, pulling away slowly, because you really want to see his face, and you run your palm along his cheek.

“Fuck, babe, that was so hot!” He exclaims, and you giggle. Somewhere along the way his Santa hat had fallen off, and his hair is a mess, curled and limp in random places. “No word of a lie, I legit thought you were gonna make my dick fall off!”

You giggle again, shifting in his grip and he settles for wrapping his arms around you, falling to the side of your body.

“Are you okay?” He asks suddenly, mildly concerned because you haven’t said anything other than his name, and he’s been gushing like there’s no tomorrow.

“Kinda sore,” you admit, wincing as you stretch your legs out, and he instinctively begins rubbing your thighs, comforting you. “But it was so good,” you insist. Even though your limbs burn, it’s a good kind of burn. One that warms your whole body, leaves you sated.

“You did well, I can’t believe you stayed in character through nearly all of that,” you praise, proud of him. There’s usually at least one major slip up when you get a crazy idea like this.

“What can I say?” He brags, face smug. “Anything to please my woman,” and you reward him with a kiss, before he grimaces. “Although, I must admit, I didn’t realise I would be used as the butt of the joke…”

You chuckle, swatting him away. He’s too sensitive sometimes. “It was just collateral damage, baby,” you tell him, before running a finger down his bare chest, collecting the sweat that has stuck there. “You know you can make me cum like no one else.”

“Yeah, I do,” he grins, looking like the cat that got the cream. “Twice in a row!”

You roll your eyes playfully, placing your head on his chest now and look up at him as he flattens your hair down, pushing it behind your ear. “Can I have my presents now? For being such a good girl?” You ask sweetly, kicking your foot to the direction of the sack on the floor, and he chuckles, shaking his head.

“In the morning,” he tells you. “It’s not Christmas Day yet—besides,” he adds, “—we need a shower, like immediately,” proving his point by jutting his hips into yours, and you’re reminded of the sticky residue that stains your flesh.  

You sigh. The only way you’re moving is if Namjoon carries you to the bathroom…and you can tell by the pout on his face, he knows that all too well…

[reiedits1]

Movie & Quotes List for “A Tribute to 2018 Cinema”

If you haven’t watched my new 2018 Movie Mashup, watch here! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1jSSiqfkCZU&t=16s

MOVIE LIST

PART ONE – HORROR/ACTION

00:00:18 – Avengers: Infinity War

00:13:09 - Overlord

00:17:23 – “You kill and torture, and you call it mercy. The universe has judged you. You asked it for a prize, and it told you no. You failed.” – Quote from Avengers: Infinity War

00:18:09 – Mission Impossible: Fallout

00:20:00 – Widows

00:21:13 – Mandy

00:23:05 – Avengers: Infinity War

00:26:12 – Kin

00:28:24 – Hereditary (double shot)

00:32:19 – Creed II (double shot)

00:37:05 – Avengers: Infinity War (double shot)

00:41:13 – Halloween

00:43:05 – A Simple Favor

00:43:05 – “You don’t believe in the boogeyman? You should.” – Quote from Halloween

00:44:05 – Insidious: The Last Key (double shot)

00:46:15 – Suspiria

00:47:19 – A Quiet Place

00:48:08 – Bad Times at the El Royale

00:49:07 – Winchester

00:49:14 – “I have faced many evils in my life.” – Quote from Insidious: The Last Key

00:51:03 – Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (double shot)

00:53:09 – The Nun

00:55:21 – “He gets in your head, like a virus.” – Quote from Slenderman

00:55:22 – The Strangers Prey at Night

00:57:05 – American Animals

00:58:18 – Day of the Dead: Bloodline

01:00:04 – Day of the Dead: Bloodline/Slenderman

01:00:19 – First Reformed

01:01:07 – “Dread it, run from it. Destiny arrives all the same.” – Quote from Avengers: Infinity War

01:02:08 – Mary Queen of Scots

01:03: 07 – Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald

01:05:01 – First Man

01:06:21 – Fifty Shades Freed (double shot)

01:08:15 – “She wants to get inside of me, I can feel her.” – Quote from Suspiria

1:08:17 – Suspiria

01:10:06 – The Endless

01:11:05 – Red Sparrow (double shot)

01:13:10 – Upgrade (double shot)

01:15:03 – “What did you see?” “I saw a nun.” – Quotes from The Nun

01:15:04 – The Nun (triple shot)

01:19:18 – Halloween (triple shot)

01:29:02 – Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (double shot)

01:30:14 – Maze Runner: The Death Cure (double shot)

01:32:06 – Mile 22 (triple shot)

01:33:07 – Red Sparrow (double shot)

01:33:13 – “God bless white America.” – Quote from BlacKkKlansman

01:34:10 – BlacKkKlansman

01:35:09 – Ready Player One (double shot)

01:36:09 – “Tonight, we will see the good and evil in everyone.” – Quote from The First Purge

01:36:15 – Are We Not Cats

01:37:09 – Bad Times at the El Royale (double shot)

01:39:01 – BlacKkKlansman (double shot)

01:40:16 – Sicario: Day of the Soldado

01:41:24 – 12 Strong

01:42:21 – Maze Runner: The Death Cure (triple shot)

01:44:14 – “You’re all a bunch of scabs!” – Quote from Bisbee 17

01:44:20 – Bisbee 17

01:46:01 – The First Purge

01:46:18 – The Hate U Give (double shot)

01:48:08 – Searching

01:49:04 – “There cannot be peace, without first a great suffering.” – Quote from Mission Impossible: Fallout

01:49:07 – Sheijkh Jackson

01:50:14 – Skyscraper

01:51:18 – Spider-Man: Into the Spiderverse

01:52:20 – Avengers: Infinity War

01:54:15 – “Do you believe in ghosts, Doctor Price?” “I do not believe in anything I cannot see or study” – Quotes from Winchester

01:54:23 – Winchester

01:55:19 – A Quiet Place

01:57:07 – Revenge

01:57:20 – 12 Strong

01:58:14 – Black Panther

01:59:05 – Winchester

02:00:17 – Bumblebee (double shot)

02:01:15 – Galveston

02:02:12 – Incredibles 2

02:03:09 – Mortal Engines

02:04:01 – “You’ve never met a monster you couldn’t love.” – Quote from Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald

02:04:01 – Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald

02:05:04 – Operation Finale

02:06:06 – Pacific Rim: Uprising

02:07:07 – Mission Impossible: Fallout (triple shot)

02:08:16 – Hereditary (double shot)

02:09:03 – Annihilation

PART TWO – EMOTION

02:14:17 – A Quiet Place (double shot)

02:18:17 – At Eternity’s Gate (double shot)

02:20:16 – “Are we gonna be okay here?” – Quote from Leave No Trace

02:21:05 – Beautiful Boy

02:23:01 – Boy Erased

02:25:06 – Isle of Dogs

02:27:06 – First Man (triple shot)

02:32:20 – Love, Simon

02:32:22 – “These last few years, more and more, it’s almost like I can feel you holding your breath. I need you to hear this – you are still you.” Quote from Love, Simon

02:34:03 – Leave No Trace (double shot)

02:36:13 – If Beale Street Could Talk

02:38:19 – Skate Kitchen (double shot)

02:41:04 – Sicilian Ghost Story (double shot)

02:46:12 – Red Sparrow

02:51:09 – Eighth Grade

02:52:17 – Mary Poppins Returns

02:54:01 – A Star is Born (double shot)

02:55:19 – The Hate U Give (double shot)

2:57:03 – “Thank you for whatever you do. To bring joy and hope, light and love, to our world today.” Quote from Won’t You Be My Neighbor

02:57:10 – The Happy Prince

02:58:08 – The 15:17 to Paris

02:59:22 – Searching

03:01:06 – Peppermint

03:02:15 – Kin

03:03:17 – Bohemian Rhapsody

03:04:16 – Every Day

03:05:11 – Eighth Grade

03:06:08 – Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle

03:07:09 – Creed II (double shot)

03:08:24 – Aquaman

03:09:20 – Peter Rabbit

03:10:21 – Galveston (double shot)

03:10:18 – “The life I once had, was taken away from me – but I’m still here. I have hope, I have my friends, and I’ll be okay.” Quote from Welcome to Marwen

03:12:09 – Love, Simon (double shot)

03:13:18 – The Favourite

03:14:12 – Skate Kitchen

03:15:08 – Welcome to Marwen

03:15:21 – Christopher Robin

03:16:24 – Crazy Rich Asians (double shot)

03:18:10 – Early Man (double shot)

03:20:06 – Bohemian Rhapsody (double shot)

03:22:11 – Welcome to Marwen

03:24:00 – Crazy Rich Asians

03:25:01 – Avengers: Infinity War

03:26:11 – “You get to decide, what kind of king you are going to be.” Quote from Black Panther

03:27:00 – Black Panther

03:28:00 – The Cleanse

03:29:02 – Hereditary (double shot)

03:31:05 – Minding the Gap

03:32:09 – Sorry to Bother You

03:33:05 – Support the Girls

03:34:05 – The Old Man and the Gun

03:36:09 – The Sisters Brothers (double shot)

03:38:08 – Thoroughbreds

03:39:15 – Tully

03:40:13 – Unsane

03:41:09 – Vice

03:42:02 – White Boy Rich

03:42:20 – “Remember, love is what brought you here. And if you trusted love this far, don’t panic now, trust it all the way.” Quote from If Beale Street Could Talk

03:43:04 – Widows

03:44:09 – If Beale Street Could Talk

03:45:07 – Boy Erased (double shot)

03:46:22 – We The Animals

03:48:07 – The Girl in the Spiders Web

03:49:14 – The First Purge

03:50:12 – Status Update

03:51:14 – Solo: A Star Wars Story

03:52:17 – Sherlock Gnomes (double shot)

03:54:17 – Ready Player One

03:55:13 – Love, Simon (double shot)

03:56:21 – Cold War

03:56:12 – Hotel Artemis

03:59:16 – Leave No Trace

04:00:14 – Mid90s

04:02:07 – Operation Finale

04:04:07 – Pandas

04:04:18 – Pope Francis: A Man of this World

04:06:01 – We The Animals

04:07:18 – Smallfoot

PART THREE – UPBEAT

04:17:16 – Aquaman

04:20:03 – Black Panther

04:21:11 – Every Day

04:23:06 – Bohemian Rhapsody

04:24:23 – Eighth Grade (double shot)

04:27:16 – Leave No Trace (double shot)

04:29:16 – Mid90s

04:30:16 – Skate Kitchen

04:32:08 – Status Update

04:33:22 – Searching

04:34:09 – Spider-Man: Into the Spiderverse

04:37:16 – American Animals

04:38:06 – Blockers

04:38:18 – Crazy Rich Asians

04:39:11 – Eighth Grade

04:40:01 – Fifty Shades Freed

04:40:24 – Acts of Violence

04:41:13 – Ralph Breaks the Internet

04:42:06 – Luis and the Aliens

04:42:24 – Kin

04:43:18 – Tag

04:44:08 – Teen Titans Go! to the Movies  

04:44:23 – Death Wish

04:45:13 – Vice (double shot)

04:56:13 – 12 Strong (double shot)

04:47:16 – Black Panther (triple shot)

04:49:02 – Unfriended: Dark Web

04:49:20 – Under the Tree

04:50:11 – Upgrade

04:51:00 – Under the Silver Lake

04:51:07 – Avengers: Infinity War

04:52:06 – Holmes and Watson

04:53:15 – Ant-Man and the Wasp (triple shot)

04:54:02 – “I wish I could fight bad guys like you!” Quote from Ant-Man and the Wasp

04:55:15 – Aquaman

04:56:11 – Incredibles 2

04:57:11 – Black Panther

04:58:16 – “I seem to mess it up almost every time.” Quote from Ant-Man and the Wasp

04:59:01 - Ant-Man and the Wasp

05:00:10 – Tomb Raider (double shot)

05:02:11 - Ant-Man and the Wasp (double shot)

05:02:10 – “Maybe you just need someone watching your back, like a partner.” Quote from Ant-Man and the Wasp

05:04:18 – The Spy Who Dumped Me

05:05:20 – The Grinch

05:06:22 – Avengers: Infinity War (triple shot)

05:09:19 – Rampage

05:11:00 – Solo: A Star Wars Story

05:12:02 – Black Panther (double shot)

05:13:05 – Bumblebee

05:14:00 – Mortal Engines

05:15:01 – Aquaman

05:16:05 – Ready Player One

05:17:17 – A Wrinkle in Time

05:18:23 – Mary Poppins Returns (double shot)

05:20:23 – Deadpool 2

05:20:17 – Goosebumps 2

05:22:18 – Mission Impossible: Fallout (double shot)

05:23:24 – Annihilation (double shot)

05:25:08 – Game Night (ten shots)

05:25:08 – “Stop!” “Wait, wait! I have kids at home!” “Not with an ass like that you don’t.” “Oh, well, thank you.” – Quotes from Game Night

05:34:21 – “Yes! … Oh no, he died!” Quote from Game Night

05:38:18 – Hunter Killer (double shot)

05:39:19 – Johnny English Strikes Again (double shot)

05:40:20 – The Darkest Minds

05:41:21 – The Equalizer 2

05:42:08 – The Hurricane Heist

04:43:02 – The Nutcracker and the Four Realms

05:43:15 – The House with a Clock in its Walls

05:44:12 – The Meg

05:44:25 – Aquaman

05:45:23 – The Predator

05:47:00 – Robin Hood

05:48:03 – Solo: A Star Wars Story

05:49:00 – Oceans 8

05:49:20 – Second Act

05:50:07 – BlacKkKlansman

05:51:21 – Happy Time Murders (double shot)

05:52:17 – Bohemian Rhapsody

[starrynight-over-thepast]

One time back in grade 9, I remember reading an article about Nicole Kidman whose headline went something like ‘How Nicole Kidman Got Dumped Into Hollywood Dumpster’ . It went on to list her recent series of ‘failures’ - as in her films weren’t generating interest anymore and all that condescending jazz. Conclusion: Nicole, it’s time you joined the other has-been’s in that Hollywood Dumpster, if you weren’t in there already.

Well, I hated to admit it but I was kind of worried, because Hollywood was (and still is, in many ways) ageist as fuck. And it’s true that many of her (then) recent films were pretty low-key. Oh boy...

Now, the year is 2017 and Nicole Kidman is literally dubbed the Queen at Cannes, having 4 films lined up for premiere, has just co-produced and starred in a both lucrative and critically-acclaimed TV show about female friendship and whose storyline about abuse resonates with many, is using her reputation to vocally and practically support female film makers by raising awareness about and starring in their projects, while continues to act as UN ambassador to fight violence against women. Honorary mention includes being the inspiration for some pretty worthy internet memes, from grinch-hand seal-clapping to spitting out pizza with graceful disgust on the Ellen show, and so many fancy-ass diamonds rings that make you think it’s a miracle she doesn’t clap seal-like more often. Who would have thought Hollywood Dumpster would be so shiny?

The point is: a big Middle Finger @ that article. A really, really big, really ugly, Middle Finger. 

Ciao.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #93

“you better run, better run, outrun my gun.”

do you like your toes? no. people make fun of them because they are SOOO TINY. do you go to church? if so, do you actually pay attention?  i don't really go regularly, no, but when i do go, i pay attention. when you are home alone at night and hear strange noises, are you afraid someone is going to break in?  sometimes. i'm paranoid like that. do you want any tattoos? if so, where? i want lots. the only places off-limits to me is my face, my breasts (don't mistake that for sternum area), and probably my ass. are any of your friends virgins?  i'm aware at least one is, but it's not my business regardless. ever held a newborn animal? kittens, yes. can you name a single song by billy joel without looking it up? i can list multiple: "uptown girl," "moving out (anthony's song)," "piano man," etc... i grew up listening to billy joel 'cuz my dad loves him. do you wish life functioned more similarly to video games, such as having a save file that you could return to after you make a mistake & therefore you could erase that from happening & start over anew? huh. not sure, honestly... do you try to avoid burping in public, or are you open about it? after all, it is a normal bodily function. i try to do it quietly. have you ever refused to read / watch / listen to something simply because a lot of people really liked it? no, that's remarkably stupid. if you have a dog, are they friendly to strangers or other dogs? teddy loves new dogs and is initially apprehensive of strangers and will bark, but then starts crying excitedly lol. cali hates strangers in general. she won't bite or anything, but she'll growl and shake a lot. it takes a while for her to warm up to strangers. bentley just follows along with the other dogs. is it hard for you to get along with people that have different opinions than you? or can you ignore all of that stuff and be friends with just about anyone? it's honestly not hard for me at all, so long their opinions aren't just blatantly harmful. be honest, did "fifty shades of grey" arouse you in any way? never watched it, never will, because i'm not interested in watching a glorified porn. do you think you’d have what it takes to shoot someone if you had to protect yourself?   i know i'd have what it takes if i had no other choice. did you parents know what gender you were before you were born? i think, but i do know that i was initially thought to be a boy because my legs were always crossed in all the ultrasound pictures. i'm such a lady. :T do you have trouble reading small fonts?  depends on the font. roughly how hot are the summer temperatures where you reside? 90s, sometimes 100s. ew. do you find watching animals in their natural habitat to be exciting & fascinating?  YES. of all the decisions you have thus far made in your life, which was the best & which was the worst? best: going to holly hill; worst: rather not talk about. discarding the fact that they can smell & tend to get dirty a lot, do you like your feet, or feet in general? i absolutely loathe feet. they're just gross. do you have a favorite film, if so, what is it and why?  "alice in wonderland," tim burton's version. i just love that movie so much because it goes to show just how endless the imagination is. what was the last piercing you got? how much did it hurt? lip. and it hurt a lot, i mean, there's a needle jabbing through an extremely sensitive area. who was the last teacher to make a lasting impression on you? coach collie<3 that man is a saint. i wish i still had contact with him. would you breastfeed your child, if you ever had/have had one? probably? breast milk has so many more important nutrients. i'll never forget this diagram i saw at the hospital while ashley was having one of her kids and it showed just how much more nutrients breast milk has versus formula milk. but i don't want kids, so i'll never make that decision. have you ever slept naked?  no. i'd be way too uncomfortable. have you ever given someone oral sex? yes, and i don't like it. have you ever cuddled with someone that wasn’t a significant other? no. if you’re in a relationship, does cuddling with someone else count as cheating?  yes. when typing, what do you use to represent laughter [lol, ha, hehe, *giggle*, etc.]? lol or ha ha do you know how your parents met? if not, is that something you would want to know?  they met at work. do you ever roleplay? online on designated forums, yes. never in real life. have you ever seen the movie "matilda"? yes!! i love that movie!! do you have a poster of your favorite band/artist on your wall? metallica, yes. is your mall nice? NO. people being shot and fighting there aren't exactly uncommon. are you hard to handle? i'm mentally ill. obviously. have you ever had your eyebrows waxed?  yes. what color was the last bathing suit you wore? black. have you ever been to cracker barrel? yes. do you like your steak rare? medium well. how much younger or older would you date someone? i wouldn't date younger than 21, and i wouldn't date older than like 29. have you ever lived with a girlfriend/boyfriend?  yes. what’s your favorite book series?  it'll probably all be "warriors" by erin hunter. how can a person tell if you’re mad or annoyed? i mumble, scowl, and barely talk. and if i do, i speak as short sentences as possible. do you actually use the camera on your phone? NO. the camera on my phone is AWFUL. if i wanna ever take selfies, i use my old phoen. do you think it’s ignorant for people to have unprotected sex when they’re not ready for a child? obviously?? are there any specific piercings you would never, ever get done? eyebrow, smiley, nipples, and whatever the fuck that piercing is where your private gets pierced. i'm sure i'm forgetting others. what’s your favorite non-animated disney film? probably "a cinderella story" do you know anyone who had to have tubes put in their ears as a baby? yeah, me. were either of your parents baptized?  i don't know. mom, probably, since she was raised roman catholic. has anyone killed one of your pets before?  people have run over our cats before. do you have a push lawnmower or a riding lawnmower? we don't mow our own lawn, so we don't have one. we have a friend who does it. what is/are your pet[s] doing at this moment?  the dogs are sleeping and venus is curled up like a total cinnamon roll in her rock. describe the main problem with your last relationship? he wanted an extrovert, which i was unwilling to fake being. are you someone who has to hide the things you like around friends?  yes, i am totally that person. i get embarrassed about the things i enjoy, idk why. have you ever been to a porn website? were you addicted to it afterword?  no, and i never will. what is the most disgusting thing you think the opposite sex can do? be abusive. have you actually been through a devastating natural disaster before? multiple hurricanes. hurricane floyd was the worst. what fast food place, in your opinion, has the best french fries? bojangle's like yaaaas do you believe one day aliens might take over the planet earth? no, i don't. is it currently your favorite season? if not what is your favorite? no. my favorite's probably autumn, but winter almost ties it. do you like soda pop? if so, which is your favorite and least favorite? mountain dew's my fave, pepsi's probably the worst. do you have any siblings you’re embarrassed about being related to? no. i'm proud of my siblings. do you ever talk to people you met online through webcam? or is that weird? no. way too awkward. who was the last person you kissed and why did you kiss this person? tyler, and because i felt obligated to. is there a day you’d just like to forget? which one? the day i attempted suicide, the night jason broke up with me and the whole day afterward... when was the last time someone dumped you?  august or september of 2015. do you like dark chocolate or white more? what about milk chocolate? out of those two, i prefer dark because i hate white, but my favorite's milk. how many times have you seen star wars? be honest. i've never watched star wars. are you good at memorizing phone numbers? NO. i don't even know my own phone number. the only one i know is my mom's. have you ever made your own website? yep. do you like men who have a sensitive side? having a sensitive side is mandatory for me if you want me to like you at all. have you ever tried to get someone into a certain band/artist?  kinda indirectly. and it worked lmao be honest, does the person you like actually deserve you? or are they actually not worthy of your affections? it's more like idk if i deserve /him/ would you ever go on "fear factor"? no. would you ever wear black lipstick? do you know anyone who does? i do wear black lipstick if i ever do wear lipstick. would you rather be a successful writer or artist?  OHHHHHH now THAT'S a good question! i don't know! what is your favorite christmas movie? jim carrey's "how the grinch stole christmas" have you ever attended a religious or private school? does sunday school count? ever suffered from post-traumatic stress disorder?  yes. i think i'm fully recovered by now though. what is the shortest relationship you have ever had with someone?  less than 24 hours. do you like korn?  HEEEEEEEEEEEEEELL YEEEEEAAAAH when you were little, did you pick up worms? do you pick worms up now?  yes and no did you like the movie "finding nemo"? it was one of my favorites as a kid. i still love it. which part of your state/province do you live in [upper, lower, middle]? the east. when was the last time you went out of state? last summer for ashley's wedding. do you like paranormal stuff? YAAAAAAAAAAAAAS what letter does your surname begin with? "d" what is one food you couldn’t live without? pizza @-@ when you’re eating pizza do you add anything like crushed peppers, parmesan cheese or hot sauce to it? i used to always have it with hot sauce... i need to do that again, it was awesome. have you ever been able to pet a normally wild animal, like a tiger or dolphin?  i don't think so. where is your dad from? ohio where is your mom from? new york if you could find one long lost friend of the past, who would it be?  megan do you consider how you act online to be different than you act in person? in some areas, yes. i'm more open and excitable online. have you ever written a short story/novel? yes. do you believe in the paranormal or cryptids?  paranormal, yes, some cryptids. which dinosaur is your favorite?  spinosaurus! would you ever play with a ouija board?  no. i don't know if i believe they work, but i sure as hell don't wanna find out. which side of your family are you closest to? mom's would you want to work at the same place as your significant other? no. i personally need some space. would you rather die or eat another human being?  i'd rather die. is there anything that you and your friends simply can’t agree on? yes; most of my friends are liberal, and i'm more on the conservative side. but i don't even agree with some of my conservative friends because i'm not entirely conservative myself. who was the last person to comment on your facebook status? what does the comment say? i was hesitant to do so, but i updated on how i've been doing since my "incident" in february. i fucking scared everyone that day and wanted to let everyone know how great i've been doing. but anyway, it was my friend maria, and i don't remember off the top of my head, but she said a lot about how she loves me and that i'll always have god. she is SUCH a sweetheart, miss her<3 what are three reasons you’ve smiled or laughed most recently?  markiplier, rhett&link, and then probably pewdiepie. youtubers legitimately keep me going lol. think about your ex, your crush, or the person you’re currently dating. Were you attracted to that person as soon as you met them, or did the attraction develop over time? do you mean physically or mentally? physically, i actually thought he was kinda weird-looking but still attractive in some weird way, and mentally, i thought he was very interesting. which do you use the most, smiley faces, kisses or hearts?  various emoticons that are usually smiley faces of some sort. is there any kind of food or drink that you used to love, but now hate? sprite. it was my favorite soda. now i just don't like it. who is your favorite disney channel person?  raven symone, off the top of my head. what do you have pierced? ears, bottom lip when you take surveys, are your answers inspired by the person's before you? occasionally do you know any immigrants? yeah. do you know how to look after yourself away from home? (budget, pay pills, feed yourself, cook, clean, do laundry etc.) not really, to be totally honest... do you like dried fruit at all? what's your favorite type?  i hate dried fruit. where is the biggest window in your house? the living room. is there any song out there that just amazes you every time you hear it?  probably "fade to black" by metallica. the solo is so fucking amazing. do your pets spazz out a lot?  the dogs, especially teddy, bark at EVERYTHING does it bother you when people write "hai" instead of "hey", or are you one of those people?  no. i do it rarely. does your dad have any tattoos? no. how often does it snow where you are? does it interrupt your day-to-day life? like... once every other year or at least a little bit every year. and it almost never does. do you get really bad periods? if so, what do you do to make them less painful?  not anymore. they used to be horrendous before i went on the pill. but if i do cramp anyway, i use a heating pad and take advil. do you prefer zebra stripes, tiger stripes, or leopard spots? tiger stripes. have you ever held a snake?  many times. have you ever seen a volcano? no. have you ever met an alaskan? i've never actually *met* her, but i have a friend who's from alaska. she may still live there, i can't remember. did you ever play spyro? I STILL PLAY THAT SHIT BROTHER do you think mouse traps are wrong? the more inhumane ones, absolutely. who is your favorite fictional character?  pyramid head what's your favorite board/card game? board game, i guess clue, but i don't really like board games. card game, "magic: the gathering." have you met the last person you kissed’s parents? no. who is the first person you see in the mornings? always mom. she sleeps on the couch just outside my room. have you ever kissed anyone you weren’t dating? no. are you friends with your best friend’s boyfriend or girlfriend? i don't have a *best* friend, but i'll answer this question for the two people i'm closest with. one doesn't have a boyfriend, the other's married. her husband's cool. there’s a serial killer in your house, what do you do? climb out a window. can you commit to one person and one person only? yes, that's the only thing i want to do in regards to a relationship. i'm strictly monogamous. how many different colleges have you gone to? two do you believe it is possible for someone to change? i take two things daily and then another if i need it. are you a submissive person?  usually, very. do you believe everyone should learn another language while still a child? hmmm. maybe. how do you feel about tattoos and piercings?  love 'em. great form of expression. do you care what people think?  a bit too much. did you like kissing the last person you kissed or the one before that more? the one before by fucking eons is there anybody you think is hot over the age of 40? james hetfield, baby. yummy. are you embarrassed to buy condoms? i never have, but i'm not sure if i would be. probably not so long as i had other things with me. but i'd still most likely use self-checkout. have you ever picked wild flowers? yeah. have you ever seen a mountain in person?  yes<3 do you prefer jam or butter on your biscuits?  jelly have you ever explored somewhere abandoned?  yes. which season do you think is the prettiest? autumn have you ever found a four-leaf clover? yes. true story, we noticed a four-leaf clover patch in our front lawn the day after my father left the family. what's your favorite type of bird? barn owls when was the last time you made out with somebody? like a year and a half ago what month of the year was your mother born?  august what's your favorite type of bread? pumpernickel, yum. do you share a middle name with any of your siblings? yes. do you consider your goals easily achievable or are they pretty grand?  in-between, i guess? my main goal is to be a successful photographer, and photography is a veeeeeery competitive industry. did the last person you kissed have piercings? yep, lip piercings. do you believe that your first true love can be your only love in life? (s)he can be, sure. are your boobs real? yeah. is the last person you kissed mad at you?  most likely would you ever be a stripper?  under no circumstance. who was the last baby you held? ryder, my nephew. do you believe there's two sides to every story?  i mean sure. don’t you miss chuck e. cheese? of course. i loved that place. would you ever get a tattoo on your collar bone? i have one on my collar bone. what do you think of girls with huge boobs that don’t wear bras in public? i don't care if you have small or big boobs, wear a bra in public, please. do wasps scare you?  YEAH have you ever worn flipflops in the snow?  lol yes do you like the ends of bananas? i don't eat the end. have you tried playing cranium? yeah. i loved those games. what was the one where you were at a festival? that was my favorite. did you own a playground set when you were younger?  a swing and a slide. do you know how to use photoshop? only very minor things. how about sony vegas? yes. when people smoke around you, does it make you cough? yes. have you ever suspected your mom or dad of having an affair? not entirely. mom claims that dad cheated on her, but honestly? i doubt that very much. my mom lies about my dad a LOT. who was your most romantic moment with?  jason who does your most embarrassing moment involve?  jason. who is your oldest friend?  he's 30-ish. sam. your youngest?  17. chelsea. who have you known the longest?  that's still my friend? colleen or summer, not sure. what was your favorite tv show as a kid?  pokemon what do you think makes crop circles?  very bored people. what are you most known for?  being addicted to meerkats lol who's your favorite cousin?  i don't really have one, considering i'm not very close to any? but audrey or brenna are the ones closest regardless. what would you do in the event of an apocalypse? die, obviously? what teacher inspired you the most? how did they? coach collie. he was so wise and intelligent and caring. would you rather go fully blind or fully deaf? blind. i couldn't live in silence. what are your feelings on feminism? people tend to take it WAY too far. describe your first relationship?  it was puppy love. we were close friends and both thought it was more when it really wasn't. describe your last relationship?  a worthless endeavor. wanted to like him when i really didn't, and he proved why i didn't. name all the pets you’ve ever had. trigger (collie), angel (lab), teddy (beagle/cocker spaniel/collie), dale (cockapoo), harley (lab/pit), delilah (don't know what she was), cali (boxer), bentley (jack russel mix), charcoal (cat), eeyore (cat), aphrodite (cat), oreo (cat), chance (cat), bobbie (cat), cheshire (cat), loki (cat), lexi (cat), at the minimum like 30 other cats, squeak (guinea pig), snickers (guinea pig), harry potter (guinea pig), another guinea pig, eurydice (gerbil), another gerbil, rhoka (rat), tezzeret (rat), rhett (rat), link (rat), mona lisa (ball python), cato (ball python), venus (ball python), shadow (chinese water dragon), and i'm sure i'm forgetting some... we've just had sooo many pets. do you put posters on your bedroom walls? my walls are covered in posters and drawings. has anyone ever told you that you’re a good singer?  yeah, but i'm not. do you have a lot of hair on your arms? or none at all?  i guess i have a normal amount. what would you do if you were stuck on a boat in the middle of the ocean? oh my god. i've no idea. probably just wait until i starve to death if there was no way to contact anyone. would you ever sell your soul?  no. what was your class song when you graduated? that stupid fucking "this is how we roll" song because i went to school with a bunch of rednecks. what's the scariest living animal that you've petted? rose-haired tarantula. do you brush your tongue with your toothbrush? of course what do you order at chik-fil-a? just the chicken sandwich. soooo good, are you a good kisser? supposedly. do you like 80’s music?  '80s metal, hell yeah. what kind of music are your parents into? mom, heavy metal, dad, classic rock cupcakes or muffins?  hmmm. muffins, maybe. do you prefer the beatles or the rolling stones? the stones do you prefer candles or incense?  incense which fictional villain is your favorite?  harley quinn what nationality is your last name?  scottish do you think trenchcoats are attractive on guys?  hell yeah did you rollerblade as a kid? do you still rollerblade? dude i was a boss rollerblader as a kid. i haven't been in a long time though. when was the last time you drank strawberry milk? all the way back in elementary school when i tried it for the first time. it was fucking awful. never had it again. do you own a pair of fingerless gloves?  i have multiple from my high school days. which of britney spears’ songs is your favorite?  "toxic" is a classic which did you have taken out last, your tonsils, appendix, or your wisdom teeth?  i still have all those. is your father homophobic?  i actually don't know. pencil or liquid eyeliner? pencil. i can't do liquid. have you ever applied make-up on a guy, for any reason at all? ha ha ha yes. i gave jason a makeover once. do you like any of the songs on "twilight," or the actual movie/saga itself?  for some reason, i specifically remember my little sister watching one of the movies on christmas one year and i remember "supermassive black hole" by muse was on there. i love that song. would you rather learn more about space or more about the ocean? space. do you have a mental illness? if yes, how have you learned to cope with it? if no, do you ever suspect you may have one? i have chronic depression, severe anxiety, either bipolar ii or bpd, plus i'm pretty much recovered from ptsd. and honestly, the main reason i'm able to cope with it all is because i'm properly medicated. but also deep breathing is a life saver. also continuously trying to think logically is very important. have you ever been tempted to start life over somewhere else? yeah. mom once contemplated letting me live with my cousins in new york when i was still really bad after the break-up, but i didn't want to. do you have a favorite character from the avengers?  loki and thor. do you like sprinkles on your ice cream? noooo. i don't like sprinkles. honestly, have you ever crashed a party before? no. which subject are you better at - science or history?  science do you know how much you weighed at birth? how much?  six or seven pounds, don't remember which. what noise does your favorite animal make?   they bark, chirp, etc. they make a lot of noises. do you like turtles, fishies, or frogs more?  hmmm. fish or frogs. choose: skygazing, or stargazing? ['skygazing', as in clouds, etc] stargazing, i assume. are you modest? i.e changing in front of others, etc? very, honestly. would ever go skydiving? what about bungee jumping? probably not, honestly. i'd be too scared of something going wrong. do you like breadsticks or dinner rolls better? why?  breadsticks, and because i just do? do you find it odd when males wear make-up and other such things?  no. do you curse in average conversations?  depends on the person i'm talking to. red, white, yellow, or pink roses? i like the pink ones that also have a peach gradient. do you ever wear colored eye liner? no. are you embarrassed about your sex life or lack thereof? no. have you ever seen a shooting star? i believe so. i've also seen a star explode! are you a comic book geek?  nope. do you think if someone is in a relationship, that it is acceptable to have sleepovers with other people of their preferred sex? honestly, no. that just sounds... weird. does the majority of the music you listen to have a lot of cursing or very little? what about when you were younger, did your parents approve of you listening to music with explicit or vulgar lyrics? some, but definitely not the majority. and mom didn't let my sisters and me listen to explicit stuff. for those who have anxiety, has anyone ever told you that you just need to calm down and actually face your fears? were you insulted or frustrated by this comment? oh, i've heard it more times than i've heard my own name. and i get both insulted and frustrated. it's ignorant as fuck to say that. what is your favorite song by coldplay? "clocks" is there something that you thought you would’ve outgrown/gotten over by now, but haven’t? forum role-play. what is your state’s largest city? raleigh, probably? maybe charlotte? do you listen to rise against?  not actively. i love their song "re-education through labor," though. have you ever taken care of a newborn baby? no, thankfully. did you play in the sand box as a kid? true shit, i created a trend of digging tunnels in the sandbox at school lmao. have you ever taken another person’s prescribed medication?   yes. pain medication. what’s important about april?  my sister's and dad's birthday are in april. would you be surprised if your parents had another baby together? well yeah, my mom's past menopause and she's also divorced to my dad... would you consider adoption?  i don't want kids. but if i did, i think i'd be more likely to adopt like a pre-teen. what’s the largest animal you’ve ever had as a pet?  a lab/pit mix. do you ever put fruit on your cereal?  ew, no. how do you usually celebrate your favorite holiday? not really with anything. :( i don't have the money for costumes. we do decorate the house, though, and carve pumpkins, but that's not usually on halloween day. do you think age matters in friendship? no. i have a close friend who's 30 and he is like my brother. are you more likely to eat when you’re bored or depressed?  depressed. do all of your exes share the same eye color?  yes. have you ever been on a ferris wheel?  yeah! are you an organ donor? yes. what would you name your pet snake if you had one?  i do have a pet snake, and her name is venus. do you like peanuts?  no.  i hate nuts. when was the last time you absolutely could not hold back your tears and broke down in a place you didn’t want to?   i'm not sure. how many tim burton movies have you seen? what do you think of his movies/animation style?   oh my, i've seen a lot.  and i adore his style; he's my favorite director. have you ever met someone who was truly insane?   at mental hospitals, yes. does anyone in your family have a serious mental illness?   my half-sister is schizophrenic. do you think you could handle having an autistic or mentally disabled child?   i don't think i could handle a kid to begin with. ever been homeless?   no, thankfully.  well, we were evicted once and i had no "permanent" house at the time, but thank god colleen let me stay with her. if you were given the chance to go scuba diving, would you?  YES! have you ever seen a live seahorse?  in aquariums, yeah.  i love seahorses. (: what color did you first ever dye your hair?   i got purple highlights. is it rare for you to feel embarrassed?   not at all.  i am like constantly embarrassed about everything. is there a website you visit regularly because it's funny/amusing?  facebook.  i go on there more for the memes than keeping up with friends lmao what’s your favorite kind of cap’n crunch?  the one that's all berries.  damn, now i want some. do you get upset when a dog jumps on you?   not "upset," but i don't enjoy it. are your bras all simple/plain or do you like having funky/colored bras? if you're a guy, do you like how girls look in bras?   i don't like plain bras.  mine have to have at least some kind of design and preferably texture. what’s the scariest thing that’s happened to you?   something i'm pretty convinced was paranormal.  i was home alone, trying to go to sleep, and my dog teddy was seriously on edge.  then he randomly jerked his head up from where he was lying beside me and started barking his head off, staring at the foot of the bed.  i'd been feeling weird all night and was fucking horrified; i tried to pull teddy's head back down because him staring with his fur raised was really scaring me, but he refused to lie his head back down.  i was fucking shaking.  he finally stopped long enough for me to call my mom almost crying.  she got our neighbor to come sleep at the house with me (my family was away at a dance competition).  and mind you, it was like, 3 am, so i was fucking terrified to the point where i was fine with waking my poor neighbor up about it.  she was very, very sweet about it, though. has an ambulance ever came to your house?  maybe?  i'm not sure, we may have needed to call when ashley had one of her episodes... ever owned a turtle?   yeah, briefly. do you like paramore?  they're okay. do you think mice are cute?   YES! is there a particular fruit that you dislike? which?   i don't like cantaloupe or pears. what's your favorite birth stone?  rubies! do you like pomegranates?  YAAAAAS as a pet, would you rather have a gecko or a turtle?   gecko! did you ever own a gameboy color? if so, what color was yours?  yes.  red. if you were going to go to the movies today, what would you want to see?  is "baywatch" out yet?  it looks funny. if you had the power to control any one of the elements, which would it be?  does darkness count?  if not, fire. at what age do you consider people to be old?   70 do you ever wear chokers?   i did in high school.  don't know if mine still fit me, though.  haven't had a reason to wear one. do bees scare you?  not bumblebees or honeybees, but like wasps and hornets, fuck yeah. do you prefer margaritas or martinis?  i've only tried margaritas, which i love. what's your favorite song by the killers?   "mr. brightside" which owl city song is your favorite?  "hot air balloon," probably. what birds do you commonly see in your town/city/province?   crows, sparrows, robins, blue jays, etc... have you ever had a tonsil stone?  no.

[ciaraelizabethbuck-blog]

Part 1

    Part 1

It all started last September, well September 2015. I met the love of my life, a slim tom boy with long curly brown hair and brown eyes with the cutest dimples when she smiles. A hat a button up shirt and a pair of jeans, what a knock out. She even drove a bad ass Malibu. It was not like any date I had ever been on before, I pull in and we look and say I hope it’s you. And thank goodness it was. On the phone with her mom in order to make sure that I was not some 300lb man. I even talked to her on the phone just to rest her soul. It was pretty cool to see that her family was so worried about it. We had Mozzarella stick and I had a famous Ciara drink all at a bar called Bamboozles. Then you know we had some other fun dates and parties, a 3am drive to bum fuck no where Peck MI to see her for a few hours. By far the date that really made our relationship was the funeral date. Meeting her family who “doesn’t” know she’s gay, being a friend but one that everyone knows is more than just your friend, the scariest moment of my life. And I so happened to just meet the most wonderful person there. Good old Aunt Donna. She told me thank you for my service held my hand and kept hugging me. Then talking about the Navy and sailing with her husband, it was pretty amazing I never felt more at home or part of a family who actually appreciated what I did. Then as we are leaving and my new found Aunt Donna gave me a hung goodbye I had my phone in my hand with a picture of my girl and I kissing and she said “cute background”! I dropped dead. I thought my new perfect impression was ruined, minus the fact that we had talked about sending provocative Christmas cards to the aunt and uncle who are the Grinch and all things religious! And the whole way home I freaked out, when come to know she just meant the case I had on my phone, the good ole American Flag. But from then on I had them won over, I got to enjoy Christmas with them and even got to have the moon shine! I even got to experience the Debbie Cindy after a funeral I am drunk scene, bickering like sisters and Cindy spilling rice on the new carpet, and asking us when we were getting married, she really had things planned out for the two of us but I think her ending was a lot better. I introduced them to cards against humanity, and good god Debbie reading those cards out loud killed me. I can still here her saying “getting hilariously gang banged by the blue man group” while eating gas station pizza, (which was the best pizza ever, (it had the most cheese.) Then we moved too damn fast I was stupid and asked her to move in with me, although the first six months of us living together were amazing, it was like sex twice a day till 3 am! The best thing ever. All the late nights and cuddles you can ask for. Decorating the room and combining our stuff. It was amazing.

Welllll…. Until I found myself way too deep in to love. I got this crazy idea in my head that I wanted to get married and run that circle, I called her mom and asked for permission because I didn’t know her dad, and I wanted to make sure her mom and grandma approved because they were very important to her. And her mom said as long as she was happy she had no problem and I believed that her grandma did like me one point in our relationship. So my brave self-racked up the nerve, picked out the ring telling all while telling the lady at Kay all about a lesbian relationship… that can be long story. So it was February now and time flies so damn fast when you are enjoying it. And I pop the question she says yes, I believe out of the kindness of her heart and just feeling the moment. There is no way she actually wanted to marry me. I just wish I would have seen it then. We have a nice bath and a good dinner at Texas Roadhouse where she showed off her ring to everyone. Then it came about the idea of moving in just the two of us and that started a fight that was really dumb when you look back now. But we did end up getting a house for the two of us in March. It was an amazing house actually the perfect house no matter how much she thought or I acted like I didn’t like it. It was the best because we were together. The only reason I ever had a slight hatred for it was because I didn’t pay for it. That’s just me being myself. We did so much in that house but I tell you man our sex life when downhill boy. We began to fight more and communicate less, it was always something so stupid too an it would just sky rocket until it was an all-night affair. That we were both guilty of. Strong hard headed people suck at fighting no one ever gives up. And then we had the worst fight ever and I did something I swore I would never do and that hit someone I love.  And I live with that regret every single day of my life, I never meant for anything to get that bad and i hope that she knows that. But we did have good times, getting Molly and being in the back yard. We got our motorcycles and would have late night rides and trips. Going to Wal-Mart every day …. And that my friends Is no joke. Setting up a pool and cutting the dang grass to picking up dog poop. Man we lived the life!! Until we go down the next road.

As you can imagine months went by and that brings us to July and that brings us to the fact! You guessed it we are no longer together. And let me tell you that my friend was not cool. It didn’t end easy. It ended in a lot of hurt and just plain shit. We didn’t know how to be together at that time but we defiantly didn’t know how to break up. Never something I ever wanted, I mean geese wouldn’t have asked the girl to marry me just to get dumped…… I am smarter than that (so I think) Well so on and so on I move out, she gets another girl friend and of course people I was pissed because duhhh I am in love and I am watching the love of my life with someone else. No I didn’t hate the girl she was ok, but what I hated was the fact that I didn’t want my girl to get hurt because she was making rash decision I believe just to hurt me like I would have done too. My girl! She is just too damn stubborn to do what she really wants. But any who, they dated for a while maybe they even had a passionate love for each other I don’t care, she came to me and told me she does love me and she would change things but now!!!! Yea that’s right now we had a love triangle going on. And someone always ends up getting hurt in the end because believe it or not people love in the shape of a triangle doesn’t work figure it out, can’t do the math for that one. Well so now we have bigger problems and to be honest I did hurtful things she did hurtful things and none of it really was every resolved and I don’t think it was worth it. I really wanted her to be happy and if it was with that girl than so be it, but I didn’t see her happy I seen a mask hiding her true feelings because that was easier, but they broke up and that was kind of weird. I don’t think that went over very well for anyone. Talk about a mess, no the mess was us trying to “well say work on things” that did not happen we lasted a week and then wouldn’t talk so 3 weeks and so on. I want you I want her, and my cake too. Good grief!

Brings up to now. And unfortunately nope still not together…. And I wish I could explain it because if I had the right words for it I think it would make a great life time movie title, and the story in general would be a great made for TV movie. Well we are on taking terms that good something’s have been discussed but that girl Is not one for talking, let me tell ya, it like getting someone with short term memory loss to tell you about their day. She not good at good byes and is no good at explaining her feelings. Or apparently letting her exs go.. Somehow one way or another we end up back in contact; well actually it’s always me, I am always the one to break the damn seal of communication. I have never seen it so easy for someone to ignore someone they claimed to “love”. Well time to give up they say, and I probably should but I won’t. You should never give up on something that you know is right. And I am stupid but I know I am not her priority or even a mere thought in her mind. I know she doesn’t text me or respond but damn it I do it takes me all of 3 seconds. But I do know she cares a little because I don’t know anyone that would keep in contact with an EX like me for this long. She said 5-10 years from now when we have our lives figured maybe we can work on things, little does she know our lives will never be figured out. And I believe that, but that is where people make the mistake. They think we have all the time in the world but our time is very limited and we are not guaranteed tomorrow. And I will never stop loving her, even if she never chooses me, because I know in my heart she is what completes me. And even if she doesn’t do the same I won’t be mad at her. I just wish I would have known it sooner so that the time I did have with her, I would have cherished more. And would have looked in to her eyes more often and told her that I was grateful for her each and every day. I would never want to get back together to have our same old relationship I would want to start all over and make a new bigger and better relationship. Fall in love all over again. We have to let go of the past but yet some of the past needs to be talked about and resolved before we move on to the future. Long shot my friends long shot. I don’t tell her that I want to see her or how much I miss her because well that just fucks stuff up! Every time, I scare her away with my feelings of overpowering love… But the truth is I think she scared because she has never had someone love her the way I do, and I don’t think anyone has stuck around and not given up like me. Or she had that an just never told me. But the girl is good at running! But running is for horses and there comes a time when the running needs to stop and the walking needs to begin. Its bad when it’s been I don’t even know how many months and you still wait up for a middle of the night call or good night’s texts from someone like my girl!

We live our lives thinking that being selfish is what’s going to make us happy and that we should care what other people think but who are those people any way.? I am a walking encyclopedia yes me the little blond haired pimple face green eyed girl. I can answer all the questions in the world except when it comes to my life, and I even give pretty good advice I just don’t know how to take it. Sounds pretty typical of a girl. This past year has been insane, lost the love of my life yes it sounds like she died but, in actuality that’s how it feels a piece of me died when she left and I left or what ever you want to call it. But I also lost my grandfather and even one of my very good friends from high school. I’ve been through a lot, even drinking and smoking sleeping really not sleeping and lord the crying never stops. Our parents say “hey kid life is not easy Work for what you want” but can they ever really prepare you for a broken heart? I don’t think so. Can they explain love, nope, and they are not going to tell you that even if you work hard for something 90% of the time you still wont get it.  It’s a lesson we learn all by our self. And some times you still can’t understand or explain to someone else the way you feel about a person and why you feel that way. For me its just something I feel in my heart and even in my stomach. I don’t need to search the world and date a million people to see that the one I want was the one I had. And to help people understand that I don’t want to move on and fall in love with someone else, because then Id wear the mask and that would be unkind of me to hurt someone else because I would never be truly happy, sure it might be ok but who the hell wants an ok relationship or to marry someone they are just ok with… think that’s the quickest way to divorce. I would rather say that I chased my love and tried to win her back and die knowing that that’s what I did then pretend to be something I am not to make others happy. It is hard enough to be a lesbian with out trying to pretend that your happy with someone for the sake of family and friends. Die a happy man they say well that’s the dang song anyway. You will die a happy lesbian when you do what’s right for you, even if it means loving someone that doesn’t do it back. There is a lot of things people don’t know about me, with my big booming out spoken personality it hard to think I have, low self esteem and that I do get scared some times I get scared of loosing the people who mean the most to me.

    I think that some times we are meant to be apart, but I don’t think that it was meant forever. I think we needed to understand what we were doing wrong and we couldn’t do that being the situation. We needed to grow and learn how to talk to each other, but realize that we were also our own people. Being together every single day for a year it was as if we were trying to form one person and forgot what it was to be alone and be ourselves. I am going off course here but who the hell cares its my story and its coming to an end. People today I face the fact that this girl that was mine for a short time and will never be mine again. I love her with everything I have but she has no clue how much she hurts me. She thinks that she is being honest with me, when its a run around. The text message I get of her being mad at me about a girl, I thought was her caring about me? I guess I was really wrong about that. I feel like it was just a way to make me unhappier and throw it in my face, that she is not with me but she does not want me talking to any one else. And that she was being so nice for a whole week when she was bored and didn’t have anyone else to talk to. She likes that I am there at her beck and call when its convenient for her, I am the back up plan. I am constantly nothing but positive to her and happy for the things she tells me despite the fact that I know she lies to me just because she doesn’t want to argue about it, and because she will say its none of my business. But some how my whole life is her business even when we are not together. Are you as confused as I am yet? I know that she “hangs out” with other girls, flirting and cuddles an I am sure she has sex. And I know that she still talks to the girl she was with after me for petes sake she spent Christmas eve with her and then told me they don’t talk. I am not oblivious to these things; I just choose to say nothing because frankly I don’t care any more. I did what she asked and moved the hell past it. I can’t change it and its been almost a year an she hasn’t changed. I was told she needs to do all this alone, and that she doesn’t want me to get the wrong impression, well the impression was made when it seemed she cared. What ever makes the girl happy. But who really wants to face life alone? I don’t really think its so much alone, I think its more of just not with you hun. I could be 100% all wrong who the hell knows. I will probably never know because she never talks to me. And I am sure in those 5 or 10 years she gives herself she will be happily with someone else, who wont ever love her as much as I do. But I can say its her loss, because I still have me. I can no longer chase someone who has no desire to be caught by me ever. It’s a game that never ends and a game that is rather upsetting. It will never end until someone has the courage to say exactly what they feel. And a game of this is played with two players and player one has made their actions very clear. So we are waiting for player two to buzz in….

    A year later and player two chimes in, still doing the same shit. Her birthday was yesterday May 30th I sent her 50$ flowers and a card, and never herd from her, I haven’t herd from her in 5 months. But yet I still cant seem to get her off my mind. I can live my life normally now but there isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think of her or miss her. Its crazy. But now it really is the end of the story because there’s nothing left to tell. I am still alone and in love with someone who is not in love with me and who could care less about me. Kinda sucks…..

[staabiverse]

A Thank You on Mudda’s Day

As the Day of Mothers approaches, I would like to thank a little lady who let me hitch a ride in her womb for nine months. A gal I call Mom.

Thank you for keeping me safe and sound when I was at my most vulnerable.

Thank you for the time in 1st grade when you stood up to a bully for me, and then later, when I was getting full of myself, setting me straight and telling me I would have to learn how to fight my own battles.

Thank you for grounding me when I was disrespectful in front of company.

Thank you for not feeding me to wolves at different points during my adolescence. I know that even on my best days I was a pain in the ass.

Thank you for cooking every meal, every day, even though cooking isn't your favorite thing to do. Thank you for the Hamburger Surprise (a big ol' slab of ground beef with an outer crust of mashed potatoes), the Saucy Suzan ribs, the multitudinous hamburgers and the lasagnas. Oh, the beautiful lasagnas. My Mama lasagna...it make the angels cry it's so good.

Thank you for making Deb and I individual birthday cakes, even though we shared our birthday parties.

Thank you for reading to us at bed time and making us pancakes shaped like Mickey Mouse (they were not licensed, so you faced some serious lawsuits).

Thank you for taking care of us when we were sick, and teaching us how to take care of ourselves. To this day, I treat my wounds with peroxide or rubbing alcohol.

Thank you for always putting us first.

Thank you for four years of driving me to high school so I wouldn't have to spend two hours on a bus every morning.

Thank you for your patience, because Lord knows, living with two adolescents...it must've been stretched to the very limit.

Thank you for always trying your best. And for making Christmas the most festive day of the year (even when certain Grinches, WHO SHALL REMAIN NAMELESS!, tried to drag the room down).

And most of all, thank you for always being there. Thank you for keeping a roof over our heads, even when it meant dumping Grandma Palpatine's bucket and serving her meals day in and day out. Thank you for being a solid foundation when the world was nothing but chaos.

Thank you for your endless support and encouragement.

For these reasons, and about a million others I don't have room to list, you really are the best Mom.

I hope this first Mother's Day as a Grandma is a great one, along with all of the days that follow.

I love you Mum, now and always. Happy Mother's Day.

Love,

-Tomas (aka Baby Boy Francis)