#dumbing down all the characters but especially andrew and neil

[jostenthusiast]

i sense an aftg renaissance y’all so be prepared

[afurtivecake]

i'd like to hear some positive opinions, something you find impressive about the books or the characters or even exy idk

oh i have so many generally positive opinions on aftg...strap yourselves in.

the thing that blew my mind about the books especially the first time is how it really put me inside neil's head. like i felt like i was learning shit along with neil and figuring andrew out. i've got adhd and sometimes i don't pay attention to stuff i read so well because my brain is too busy spotting the patterns and predicting the direction the author is going to take the story. but aftg? it snapped me right into neil's thinking and made me follow along at his pace. it made me really feel those 'holy shit' moments when characters were doing something significant instead of just thinking, 'ah yes, of course, i thought that might happen'. and that's something special to me.

i love that aftg reads like an ace romance. and i don't mean a romance that features an ace character, i mean a romance that sees romance the way that someone who is ace might see romance. i am ace and i can't really explain it that well. but i guess it's sort of how love is contained in the small moments, the tiny gestures, like andrew opening neil's protein bar for him because he sees him struggling with it, like neil looking to andrew to silently ask him, 'hey, can i run my mouth or should i not?' and andrew understanding him. one of the most memorable moments i've had in my life that i felt was romantic but probably wouldn't be interpreted as such by others was when i watched an ad with someone and thought of a dumb joke. we looked at each other at the same time and we both burst out laughing without saying anything because we could tell that we both had arrived at that same dumb joke at the same time. I think that's very much how nora sakavic writes romance in general because you can also see bits of that kind of feel in tsc, even though jean and jeremy aren't clearly ace like neil.

i also love how relatable the characters are. the whole series is a damn good look at various trauma responses. it feels familiar to me and it reminds me of people i know. i love that the narrative doesn't judge the characters for how they deal with their trauma responses. the narrative doesn't try to push the characters to heal in professionally proscribed ways and i find that really reassuring. cuz i've been there before. i've been at a place where i wasn't letting myself want anything because i just couldn't picture a future where i could have it, i've been down that irrational, borderline paranoid trust issues hole and it would have pissed me right off if i had read a story where the message was, "it's all in your head and getting professional help would fix it". but the narrative in aftg isn't trying to fix its characters. the narrative asks, "what do you need to get through this?" and then gives it to its characters.

and lastly, i actually really like the sports narrative that is present. i think the sports narrative mostly applies to andrew. his character development is one of the only ones that actually has a lot to do with playing exy. he starts off the series as someone who is not just apathetic but disdainful of exy even though he has buckets of talent. being a goalkeeper is easy to him and it's also boring because that's all he does. that's a fairly common trope in sports. usually the arc of those kinds of characters is finding something that challenges them and finding reasons to play and to enjoy the sport. and that's exactly what andrew goes through. neil tells him at one point that he's good at being a goalkeeper because he plays it how he plays life: letting other people run themselves ragged and cleaning up afterwards. and andrew kind of takes it to heart because he starts to apply his batshit crazy methods for fixing people's problems to exy. his solution to one match that was dragging on was to tell nicky to pick a fight. and he finds that he enjoys playing that way. by the end of the series, he's having a blast being the brains behind the operation in that final ravens match where he switches neil to defense. and yes, a lot of that character development happened outside of exy (ie. andrew finally starting to let people in), but it's a progression that you can track through the matches he plays. character development that you can track through how they play a sport is what a sports narrative is, to me at least. (i came at aftg from the world of sports manga, alright? where it is ALWAYS all for the fucking game. you see the characters develop as people by playing their sport and that's what i really wanted out of my sports novels. and seeing andrew get that kind of character development isn't much, but it's pretty cool all the same)

[ao3feed-thefoxholecourt]

we've seen beyond the stars

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/BK8eEUl

by Patrocool (all_the_homo)

Neil had no one to blame except himself for his lapse in judgment. He may be still nursing a stab wound in his side and possibly have sprained his ankle when he had run, but he knew better than to let his guard down for a single second. Especially while stowed away in the cargo hold of a ship.

Well, he thinks dryly, its a bit late now, isn’t it?

Because now he had a blade pressed right against his jugular and he could barely even swallow without feeling the blade cut his skin like paper, and he felt the ice cold edge cauterize the wound as it made it.

--

Neil is on the run and happens to stowaway on the Fox Teeth, a ship docked and loading supplies at the moon port he desperately needed to escape from.

Unfortunately for him, it seems he had underestimated this ragtag crew.

Words: 9639, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Categories: Gen, M/M, Other

Characters: Neil Josten, Andrew Minyard, Matt Boyd, Danielle "Dan" Wilds, Seth Gordon, Allison Reynolds (All For The Game), Renee Walker (All For The Game), Aaron Minyard, Kevin Day, David Wymack, Nicky Hemmick

Relationships: Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard, Neil Josten & Andrew Minyard, Matt Boyd/Danielle "Dan" Wilds, Seth Gordon/Allison Reynolds

Additional Tags: the whole gangs here, including seth for some reason, Inspired by Treasure Planet (2002), Space Pirates, Alternate Universe - Space, Space Battles, Canon-Typical Violence, First Meetings, Stowaways, Inspired by The Mechanisms, dumb space names for everything

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/BK8eEUl

[i-did]

Ok ok this may be a dumb question but we'll see, what are your thoughts on bdsm + andreil? The vast vast majority of these types of fics have Andrew as the dom (and I get why) BUT theres 1 dom Neil fic and I'm like 99% sure I think I saw u comment on it so I'm assuming ur reading it and enjoying it too. And tbh, I find it much better than pretty much all the dom Andrew stuff, I hadnt realised the potential dom Neil could have until I read it. But anyway, I wanted ur thoughts? 🤲 (this is so badly phrased I apologise)

Lmfaooo being perceived is so weird. I hope I didn't say anything because I remember commenting on that fic and thinking about commenting something about my personal sex life, but I don't remember if I did lmfaooo. Omg okay, all that aside–time to now respond to this seriously.

Okay regarding that specific fic, yeah I read a lot of AFTG fics of all types, I haven't read something NSFW in a while, but when I saw the ‘Dom!Neil’ tag I decided to give it a shot. It’s interesting seeing how other authors go about their ideas and just enjoying their story. It doesn’t align with my personal ideas of everything obviously, but those are my personal HC and that fic is that authors personal HC. I like that they’re exploring something that this fandom doesn’t see explored a lot and is just a fun read, lol. Honestly I give up on most BDSM fandom fics because the depiction of Neil makes me uncomfortable ...almost always. I agree a lot more with this fics concept of how they would explore power vs control in a BDSM sexual sense, than most Dom!Andrew Sub!Neil fics– which I have long ago stopped trying to read.

Okay here are my personal ideas about Andrew and Neil, and how they would explore sex.

Many NSFW HC below the cut:

I personally don’t think canon Andrew and Neil would go into BDSM culture or ascribe to either roll strictly. I feel they wouldn’t like established dynamics like that and would get turned off by that aspect, especially since Andrew both craves control of situations but fears ‘being like them’ and a lot of Dom play is about power dynamics that he wouldn't be comfortable with. Andrew sees power in sex as different as control during sex. He needs a controlled environment, and be in control of the other by having them listen to his boundaries, but he can’t feel he’s overpowering the other person. I don’t think he could do a lot of strictly Sub things either for similar reasons, he would feel like he's giving up control of the situation in a way that could make him very uncomfortable.

Neil on the other hand is also often portrayed as a very textbook sub, but I don't think he is. I see him written as a brat a lot, but personally I don’t see him doing that since a lot of what playing with a brat is, is giving them what they want and denying them what they want and them ‘defying you’ and stuff. It's like a form of playful miscommunication I don't see Andrew or Neil ever actually doing. Obviously all healthy and proper play is outlined and discussed beforehand, but I see Andrew and Neil as needing the actions themselves to be clear and cut and dry.

Neil also gets off on Andrews pleasure, Andrew is the same about Neil, they're almost like a feedback loop of “the other enjoying themselves is inherently hot.” to me, Neil getting off on other people (Andrew) getting off is a very Dom like quality. In turn, Andrew is very turned on by pleasuring Neil, but from the point of his knees, which is almost sub like, he is turned on by sucking someone else off and seeing how into it they are. Either way, I think they both wouldn’t be into hardcore BDSM or BDSM culture but also aren’t vanilla. I don’t see either of them going to leather clubs instead of Edens and going to Folsom Fair and joining BDSM social groups and stuff.

I also don’t think either would ever use titles for the other, I think they don’t call each other by their names often on a day-to-day basis, since usually the people were talking to already know their name, and we don’t need to use it for clarification. I do think–just like in canon with emotionally charged moments–names will be used with more emphasis, especially Abram which is not used frequently.

Side note about my Jewish Neil HC: Judaism rocks because sex isn’t shamed, but rather considered a blessing and a holy act. In fact, it’s a good thing to have sex on Shabbat, G-d is actively like ‘fuck yeah you little humans, enjoy life’s pleasures and each other's company’ sex was designed to feel good and a way to connect. Shabbat is all about human connection with those important to us, and a day of rest away from work, so sex on Shabbat is actually actively a good thing. I don’t think Neil is ever religiously Jewish, but Andrew making a joke about this once would be peak to me. Which also fits Abram, a very Jewish name I HC to be not just Neil’s middle name but his Jewish name, and is used in said holy context of sex.

I think like a lot of healthy adults who are sexually active, they will explore and will be more adventurous to try new and other things, especially when dealing with issues like waning to get off but having touch aversion and issues like that. I have a lot of sex life HC about them actually, ways they navigate erectile dysfunction, mental health, and what they like in a safe environment. They trust each other, and I like imagining different ways aspects of their relationship would change or evolve in my head in all different types of ways, including sexual. I also enjoy giving them kinks and inclinations I specifically don’t have, because it’s like me exploring the concept of why someone else might like something even though I personally don’t. I’m not imagining things that make me uncomfortable necessarily, just things I'm neutral on or don’t see the appeal of, but know why they appeal to others and try to imagine what these characters might think.

I feel canon Andrew and Neil explore sex and dynamics that make them comfortable, I have HC about Andrew possibly exploring pup play and wearing a collar for Neil partially as a “joke” in the beginning, but discovering they really like it. I also HC Neil is really into athletic stuff sexually, he thinks Andrew half dressed with his padding still on and a jock strap is just peak sex appeal. I also think Neil is very sensory, and makes associations with smells and senses easily, so he develops a sweat kink, which leads into his armpit kink. Neil isn't turned on by ‘the bad smell of sweat’ but rather the fact that when Andrew is sweaty he smells like Andrew a lot, rather than after a shower he smells more like soap, and he can’t smell Andrew as much. Andrew on the other hand prefers cleaner sex. He’s not triggered by dirty sex though– he used to suck guys off at an alt dance club and is used to the smell of sweaty balls, it's just not an active turn on. Neil has ‘nothing is hotter than Andrew wearing running shoes and socks, and only running shoes and socks’ energy to me too. I think Andrew feels good about himself in leather, but isn't going to be a leather daddy and wear the leather assless chaps and the cap, he will wear the leather harness that every gay wears to pride, but he wears it just for Neil. Also, Neil loves Andrews pecs, Neil’s kinda a boob guy, but for Andrew’s pecs specifically.

I personally think Andrew and Neil typically don’t have penetrative sex. They do it sometimes–and when Andrew is ready he will bottom more as a way to prove something to himself than anything–but it’s not their preferred way or their ‘go to’. When they finally do, they don’t see it as ‘finally having sex for the first time’, since all the sex they've been having is real sex, even if its oral, hand jobs, etc. I don’t think Neil is naturally inclined to bottoming, and since even the visual of topping can make Andrew uncomfortable, they enjoy sex in any other ways, thigh fucking, docking, Andrew fucking Neil’s ass cheeks, sucking each other off, mutual masturbation, frottage, etc. and it leads to stronger orgasms when they don’t have to hope ever second will be a cliff edge and turn into a panic attack. Safer waters are simply more comfortable for them to swim in, and they deem all sex as equal in ‘value.’ that being said, Andrew likes his ass being ate, as long as its just Neil’s tongue, while Neil is neutral on his ass being ate, but loves doing it to Andrew.

I also think they would explore toys, but not in the way they're often explored in fics, which is very vibrator and dildo centric. I think they would use jacking off toys, the disposable egg kind or some more long term ones, maybe even something they could use at the same time. I don’t see them ever actually using handcuffs or restraints really either. Andrew would see Neil tied up as an equivalent statement of ‘I don't trust you not to touch me’ when he wants to actively progress past that, and shows he trusts Neil by not holding his arms back or letting him touch him. Andrew had to hold down previous partners, but Neil is different, Neil listens. This isn’t my personal opinion about restraint, but it is what I think Andrew would think.

I have no idea if this is what you meant by ‘my thoughts’ but here they are. *puts something in your open palms,* idk what emoji that would be

[scribbleb-red]

Neil is a lying liar who lies AU

A Morning AU - with a fab prompt from @djhedy

There’s a new boy in Andrew’s class and there’s something not quite right about him. He’s mouthy and sharp, the kinda kid that should end up in detention three times a week but never does.

They are seven years old, though the new kid looks five, with eyes like a wide open sky. 

He is very pretty - that’s why Andrew notices him first - he looks like a fairy prince. 

And it’s because Andrew is watching that he notices though: the kid is a big bad lying liar who lies. 

The day he joined, the kid said his name was ‘Stefan’ to Mrs Stewart and ‘Chris’ to Mr Brasenose. The next day he was just ‘Neil’ and was given a fond, exasperated warning to keep his make believe in the playground. 

 But the kid didn’t stop lying.

Some lies were big and others were small. 

On a Tuesday, Neil announced that he’d had a huge feast for breakfast - listing all the foods and making everyone’s mouth water with the descriptions. (But Andrew saw how he winced nd held his stomach like it was empty.)

On a Thursday, Neil said he grew up in England and proceeded to spend the next week speaking in a post English accent. (But he later admits at lunch it was just a couple months).

On a Friday, Neil whispers that his house is haunted and he’s scared to go home for the weekend. (There’s a little too much truth shining through those eyes as he talks about the ghost in his house. Andrew doesn’t doubt that he’s scared of something).

The following Monday, Neil explains his bruises by saying he spent the week learning to skateboard. 

“My cousin visited and let me use her skate board. It was pretty rad.” 

(Andrew eyes the split lip, it could be true. But then he sees the hand shape around Neil’s thin wrist and knows the truth: it’s a lie.)

Through it all, Andrew is very quiet and very alone. He knows how this goes - he’s seven years old with more cracks in his heart than a fifty year romantic - but he kinda enjoys Neil’s lies and how he gets away with them.

He particularly likes the outrageous ones: 

My father parachuted into Paris because he’s a spy. He died landing on the Eiffel Tower. I once wrestled a monster. I won but it stole all my mom’s apples. I’m telling the truth. My tongue goes green when I lie. I met Kevin Day.

Andrew won’t pretend he’s not intrigued. He thinks Neil is interesting and his lies are ones he can often hold in the dark, imagining over and over when he’s hurt and wishing to be anyone, anywhere but here.

Plus Neil is funny - he always snarks at the teachers and gets away with the most ridiculous things. Other kids always want to play with him because his games are brilliant - epic journeys, castles and wizards, magical tigers, patchwork villains made from the skin of children. 

Some of Neil’s tall tales are part fairytales, part nightmares.  And Andrew isn’t sure which part Neil actually belongs to. There are times where he’s the brightest, prettiest boy on the playground. And times where his eyes are haunted, mouth wicked cruel. And then there are times like today, where Neil is quiet and blank - a little too familiar to what Andrew sees in the mirror these days, looking like someone has scooped out his insides and left nothing but darkness behind in its wake. 

Andrew almost talks to him then. 

Almost.

But he doesn't. Not for another few weeks. Not until Neil's facing down Greg Doyle - the fight has the vibe of a hissing kitten against a rottweiler. 

 There's no way Neil can win. Greg is a third grader and big beside. 

But Neil doesn't look scared. He looks ferocious.

Not that appearances are going to help. Neil could have the sharpest claws of them all and he'd still weigh nothing against Greg. Neil dodges and ducks the first few blows. He snipes and snarks, that liar's mouth rattling off stories of how he took down a SWAT team once.

But dumb luck can’t do everything and finally Greg gets a thump in, straight across Neil’s jaw - hard enough to make him stagger. 

"So much for a SWAT team, fucking liar." 

There are gasps at the bad word from the growing first and second grade audience. 

"Tongue turns green," Neil says. He spits out blood.

Andrew's had enough when he sees the blood. 

Neil might be an idiot but Andrew knows that there's no way to win this one on alone He steps forward and puts himself between Neil and Greg. 

"Oooo who's this, your boyfriend?" 

Andrew would roll his eyes, but can't be bothered. He is the tallest kid in their year at nearly 4'5. He can look the nine year old Greg in the eye without trouble and he can see the bigger kid calculating his chances of taking Andrew on instead of the skinny little creature that was Neil "motor mouth" Josten.

"Back off," he says. He doesn't inflect. He watched a cartoon where a character spoke completely flat and it was really scary so he figures this might make Greg cower too. "Leave him alone."

Greg nearly steps into Andrew's space but someone has started a whisper: 

Andrew Doe is the kid who killed his parents. Andrew Doe is the kid that burned a house down. Andrew Doe is the kid who took on Bertie Becker from fifth grade and flushed his head down the loo.

It's the last one that gives away the source of these rumours - Neil has started a chain of Chinese whispers. And Greg hears them swirling from mouth to mouth, ear to ear, each more terrifying than the last. It makes Andrew want to grin, so he does. Greg actually whimpers.

The crowd laughs when Greg runs away - he can’t save face when he’s fleeing from a first grader. 

Andrew feels triumphant. 

 Especially when Neil steps up beside him, shy smile and summer sky eyes. “Thanks Andrew.” 

 Neil Josten knows his name, Andrew thinks. Wow wow wow.

Neil’s mouth is swollen but he’s still the prettiest boy in the playground so Andrew doesn’t say anything. 

“Want to play a game?” Neil says. 

 Andrew shrugs. 

 “Yes or no?” Neil says again. “I won’t force you but I’d like to play with you to if you’d like to play with me.”

Andrew thinks about it before saying yes. 

It’s the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

*

They start with games - make believe quests and imaginary journeys. They visit magical worlds in their heads and fall about laughing when one of them (mostly Andrew) doesn’t break character even for class.

They become inseparable - two boys with home lives full of ghosts but dreams that can take them anywhere. The lying liar is the better story teller but the stoic hero a better actor. And sometimes in games they hide their truths - violent families and horrifying pasts.

Neil shows Andrew his scars, “I sometimes say they’re from a shark or ninjas and stuff but...” 

“That’s from an iron.” 

“Yeah.”

In turn, Andrew tells Neil about his foster family. 

“We could poison him,” Neil says. “I heard we can make poison from apple cores. Applesenic or something.”

If only it were that simple.

It happens just before the end of the year - summer is nearly there and Andrew can only imagine how fun it'll be having a friend to adventure with for the first time. And then he finds out that his foster family is getting rid of him. He'll be packed off at the end of term.

"I think mom and I will move too," Neil admits. "We never hang around anywhere long." 

"Because of your dad?" 

"Yeah..." Neil plays with the hem of his t-shirt. "He's in prison but mom is still terrified. She moves us a lot." 

"Maybe you can move to the same place as me."

They pretend that the world isn't going to split them apart. 

They pretend that they're going to have the summer together. 

And the year after. 

That they'll start middle school together. 

And be best friends all the way to the end of high school.

And go to the same college.

"We could play exy together all the way through," Neil says. It's his new obsession. 

"I'm not going to play stickball. I prefer playing games with you." 

"We can play games on the court. You can be the fierce dragon and I'll be the knight that looks after you."

"You'd steal all my dragon gold." 

"Would not." 

Andrew raises one eyebrow. 

"Okay, yes I would. I'd be the knight trying to take your gold. But I'd be sneaky about it." Neil's laughter is high and bright. "Does that mean you'll play with me?" 

"Yeah okay," Andrew says.

But it doesn't work out that way. 

Neil vanishes like sun behind a mountain the day after term ends. 

Andrew's bags are packed. He's dumped in a new home near the beach. He hates the beach. He misses Neil the way his lungs miss oxygen when he's stuck in the swell of a wave.

He does play exy though. 

He does it because he figures one day he'll find Neil on a court too. 

He'll either face him down or by some miracle they'll be on the same team. 

He'll find Neil again. He will.  

He tells himself this every day. 

Even when it feels like a lie.

*

Something like an epilogue

Years pass before Andrew hears anything about the little boy who - for two semesters when he was seven - was his best friend. So many years that if it weren't for one polaroid from a cheeky arcade photo-booth, he might have let the idea of Neil go.

But he keeps the photo with him - through home after home, through Cass and Drake and juvie and Aaron and Nicky. He hides it in books, folds it into pockets. Makes sure to hold onto Neil and the memories of those few happy months.

He plays exy. Keeps track of other teams and their players. The sport does nothing for him - but sometimes he closes his eyes and imagines Neil with his flashing blue eyes mischievous smile and that long ago conversation. He remembers why he's doing this.

At 13, he asks Pig Higgins to do a search on Neil's name but the policeman refuses. 

At 14, he goes through the entire directory for California and when that's exhausted, he starts searching every state from West to East. 

He calls 362 Jostens across the USA. None are Neil.

When he turns 16, he uses a fake and has two small dragons outlined on the top of his left shoulder. 

When he's 17 he meets Riko and Kevin Day. He remembers Neil once saying he'd met Kevin and wonders if that was true or just one of Neil's many many lies. He turns the Ravens down.

He signs two weeks later with the Palmetto State Foxes - taking his brother and cousin with him. 

He watches as the lists of drafted players on other teams go up. There's no Chris or Stefan or Abram - not with the matching face Andrew wants. There's no sign of a Neil Josten.

Andrew smooths out the photo at night, slipping it between the pages of Whitman's Leaves of Grass every morning. 

Maybe it's time to put the memory of Neil to rest, but he can't. 

Neil is one of those beautiful ghosts that he can't help but hold onto. The one unspoilt thing in his memory.

Unspoilt, that is, until a Monday when Kevin Day announces he's recruiting a nobody from a nothing town in the middle of nowhere Arizona and the nobody's name is Neil.

"Neil what?" 

"Josten. Want to see his tape?" 

"Nope," Andrew says. But his heart is a thunderdrum, hope cutting through the medicated hyper mania easy as a knife through butter. "Actually yes, gimme the tapes little birdie." 

Kevin grimaces at his nickname but says nothing until they’re watching the tape. And then he can’t shut up about the player’s potential, his speed and natural flare on the Court. 

It's not Andrew’s Neil. 

But it is too. 

The striker on the court is a brunette with dark eyes but he runs like Neil. He's ferocious and plays like it's the last thing keeping him afloat. He has that little flick of his racquet before he goes to score, a telltale that would never get passed Andrew but no one else seemed to have noticed. 

Andrew says as much to Kevin. 

"Exactly," Kevin says. "That's why we have to have him."

So they go to Millport. 

And Andrew knows Neil well enough to anticipate that he'll run. 

Knows him well enough to trip him with a racquet and catch him as he falls. 

Neil hasn't grown much either - he's still small and sharp and far too pretty to be real.

"Stupid little liar, you should watch where you put your feet." Andrew wishes he were sober. Wishes he didn't have to greet Neil with this grin splitting his face. 

Wishes wishes wishes. 

But his one wish has already come true, Neil is here with him. Warm and lithe and alive.

"Drew?" Neil says, but the word is choked and breathless. Neil’s voice does something to Andrew’s insides and Andrew feels the muscles beneath his hands warring between flight and relief. 

"Neil," he replies. 

"Oh my god, Drew." 

And then Neil's arms are around Andrew's shoulders, and his face is turning into his neck and Andrew realises they're hugging and he shouldn't want to hug back but he does. He does because it's Neil. His friend. His pipe dream. The little boy with the pathological need to lie and an imagination that could create whole worlds from a handful of dust. 

He hugs Neil tight. 

Never wants to let go.

Kevin of course ruins the moment. 

But Neil isn't going to say no to the Foxes. Not now. 

And even though Andrew can recognise the lies slipping passed Neil's lips, he doesn't tell Wymack. Doesn't call out his idiot's new ouchies. Doesn't answer any questions when Kevin demands answers.

"Sign," he speaks only to Neil. He means, Stay with me. "We can play a game. Yes or no?" 

"Yes," Neil says and his smile is a little wild, a lot wonderful. "Let's play a game."

The End.

[thealternatemind]

Rules: name ten favourite characters from ten different things (books, tv, film, etc.) then tag ten people.

@ellacj thank you i love you this one was so much fun i have so much to say!!!

so...... i ended up writing a lot. i love fictional characters a lot, okay?

caleb widogast (critical role) -- what can i say? traumatized, mentally ill yet incredibly silly nerd that adores cats and his friends???? um.... me? in all seriousness, i relate to him a lot, and he serves as a huge comfort character for me. i adore him, and even that word doesn’t suffice how much he means to me.

ronan lynch (the raven cycle/dream trilogy) -- i appreciate an angry character, especially when that angry character grows into something more. he’s so dynamic and has changed so much from trb, which is fascinating, since he himself believes that he’s static

yennefer of vengerberg (the witcher) -- she doesn’t get enough love from the fandom. she is a complicated, angry, and traumatized woman written FOR women. she has been taught to maintain control her whole life, when all she wants to do is SCREAM. the woman experience right there.

michael guerin (roswell new mexico) -- i saw a bisexual disaster, and i said, “that. i like that.” this show is trash, but the characters make me love it. michael is filled with love and struggles so hard to express it, especially when love his whole life, whether romantic or platonic, has been tied to pain.

lydia martin (teen wolf) -- i was a teen wolf kid from 2012-2016, man. i worshiped this show in my teenage years, and lydia was a huge part of that. seems like a nasty, shallow girl on the surface. underneath, she is so deeply caring and soft and intelligent.... also she made me realize i was gay

gorgug thistlespring (fantasy high) -- i just started fantasy high!! gorgug is ADORABLE. awkward nerd boy? hey it’s my character type! he’s just really dumb and wants the best for his friends and to find his father and just... i love that about him. also he’s bi/pan, which automatically makes me adore a character more.

neil josten (the foxhole court/all for the game) -- SASSY BASTARD KING. i binge read the first book in one sitting, and i remember the MOMENT he roasted riko on live television, that he would go down in history as one of my faves. he cares so little about his own well-being but adores his friends and andrew so much... he’s so, so funny in a dry way, and he doesn’t even know it

sirius black (harry potter) --  i’m a marauders ho. y’all know that. fanon sirius gives me life. he’s been through such a rough, hard life. it’s made him desperate for attention. it’s made him vain and mean, but that doesn’t stop him loving his friends so, so much... he would do anything for them.

steve harrington (stranger things) -- steve. everybody loves good ol’ steve. he’s a classic himbo. his best friend’s a lesbian. he’s great with kids! he has awesome hair! what isn’t there to love? i just wanna chill with him, ya know?

isak valtersen (skam) -- BOI. what a little snake, amiright? he’s an icon though. i couldn’t not include him. he goes from a slimy little asshole to an adorably sweet little asshole! he messes up constantly, which i love. but he always comes back from those mistakes. he apologizes. he grows. from season 1 through 4, he changed so, so much.

i’m probs not tagging 10 ppl cuz i don’t think i know that many but i’ll tag some mutuals! @vvlcanspock @gleedegrassi-bigfan @221buckythesoldier @breadsacrifice @hallieisntbritish @littlecajunlady @quoththeraven-fuck @my-mind-is-a-weapon @thirst-god brace yourselves, i’m about to tag y’all in another haha!

as always, no pressure to finish this! i just think they’re fun. (:

[aestheticminyard]

Is It A Video? (Rated T | 1431 | 1/1)

Neil and Andrew over summer vacation in high school, playing video games together and falling in love like the teenagers they could’ve been.

For Day 6 of #AndreilWeek2018 for the prompts “distance” and “video games” (more prompts)

Read on ao3

“That’s not realistic at all.”

“Are you seriously criticizing a gang war in a video game that also features aliens and mutant clones? As if that’s the unrealistic thing here?”

“…maybe”

Andrew rolled his eyes. His phone was balanced precariously against his laptop screen, the video slow and grainy, but undeniably it was Neil’s dumb face taking up the entire screen, eyes flickering back and forth between the phone and his own laptop.

“You know,” Andrew said, “you might die less if you put your phone down and played with two hands like God intended.”

Neil stuck his tongue out at Andrew, but the video lagged for a moment and his face was stuck like that while his quiet laughter filtered through the tinny, shitty speakers on Andrew’s phone.

“If you’re going to be rude, I’ll just hang up on you,” Neil retorted. Now Andrew’s entire screen was filled with a close-up of Neil’s eyes, impossibly blue and cartoonishly sad beneath his eyebrows.

Andrew ignored the rush it sent through him and said, “Then you would have no one to teach you how to not die every five seconds in Saints Row.”

Neil pulled away from the screen a little, an exaggerated frown now adorning his lips. The angle was strange, making him look even cuter and more…squishable than usual. Andrew stomped down on that thought with all his might, but he felt his face heating so he turned away, but not before he caught a glimpse of a smile replacing Neil’s frown; he only blushed harder, determinedly looking away. Neither of them spoke, but Andrew could feel Neil’s eyes on him. Their silence was only broken by the occasional shout of Neil’s character getting the shit kicked out of him on his laptop, since he still hadn’t mastered the art of pausing his game before deciding to stare at his maybe-boyfriend for hours on end.

“I miss you,” Neil said quietly, and Andrew’s eyes snapped back to his face. Neil’s expression was carefully neutral and now he was the one not looking at the screen.

Andrew wished eye contact wasn’t completely impossible over facetime, wished that Neil was sitting right in front of him on his bedroom floor so that Andrew could curl his fingers around the back of Neil’s neck. He’d never been particularly tactile before, but he wanted so badly to wrap his arms around Neil and protect him from the horrors and disappointments of the world. He tried, though. He always tried.

“Hey,” Andrew said, “Look at me.”

It took a moment for Neil to look back at the screen, eyes turned down a bit as he looked at Andrew’s face rather than at the camera. The disparity grated at the edges of Andrew’s nerves, but anything was better than not seeing Neil for the next few weeks until school started back up. He looked at Neil’s face—had he ever really stopped—tracing the pixelated jawline with his eyes, memorizing the face he knew so well. He sighed, a sound so sad he was shocked it came out of his own mouth.

“I’ll get you out of there,” he said finally, softly, attempting to meet Neil’s eyes to no avail.

Neil smiled wryly, looking down and away from the screen. “Last time we played Portal, you couldn’t even get yourself out of the pit you fell into without my help.”

“Neil, I will hang up on you,” Andrew said, a scowl forming. It was hard to keep up the act when Neil laughed like that again, and he rolled his eyes before Neil could look back and see how fondly he was looking at him. “We make a pretty good team, I’ll give you that.”

“Teamwork makes the dreamwork?” Neil asked in a questioning tone, and Andrew finished his elongated eye-roll only to glare at Neil. Fuck. Who let him be that cute? It should be illegal, but maybe there were enough illegalities in Neil’s past that God just gave him this.

A knock on Andrew’s door tore their eyes from the screen and each other. Neil glanced at his own door behind him as a reflex. Andrew fumbled for the mute button on his screen, missing the first few times.

Andrew cleared his throat. “Come in,” he said. Bee stuck her head in the door, her usual calm smile gracing her face and preceding her into the room. She perched above him on the bed, glancing over at his paused screen and the sliver of Neil’s face still visible (since he could never quite manage to get completely out of the frame).

“How is Neil tonight?” she asked, knowing that Andrew would have muted himself.

“He’s fine,” Andrew said, and Bee hummed. She wiggled her fingers at the camera and Neil frantically responded with a wave of his own. Neil had a strange relationship with all parents, especially his own, and found it harder to ignore one in any way.

“Three weeks right?” she asked Andrew, and he turned away from Neil to look up at her. He nodded. “I’m glad you’ve found a way to still talk despite the distance.” When Andrew didn’t reply, she smoothed her hands over the suit she hadn’t yet changed out of. “Do you want a kiss goodnight?”

“Yes,” Andrew said, and she pressed one to the top of his head before standing up. He called out a “Love you, Mom,” before she reached the door.

Bee turned back with a smile. “I love you too, Andrew,” she said quietly, with another wave at Neil though he couldn’t see. She shut the door behind her.

He unmuted himself and Neil immediately started speaking as though he could sense it. “She wasn’t mad, was she?”

“It’s summer vacation. I doubt she would mind anyway.” Andrew and Neil had started up their facetime-gaming dates once school let out for the summer, and Andrew’s parents had to work to hide their happiness at the new event he’d added to his daily schedule. They tried to talk every night, even if it was just for a little bit—to talk about what happened that day (Andrew usually saved his juicy tidbits from work to bring a smile to Neil’s face, since Neil was cooped up in his house all summer until registration for classes) or just to fall asleep together. Pig and Bee were never upset with him and placated the nerves he’d had the first night they caught him with a few jokes and a lot of acceptance.

Neil attempted to stifle a yawn, and Andrew’s eyes were on him again. “Did you sleep last night?”

“Yes,” Neil said immediately, but winced at the lie once it left his lips. “A little. It’s just—it’s just easier to fall asleep with you.”

They’d only been friends for less than a year (grudgingly thrown together in gym class, forming a friendship based on skill and a collective interest to kick Kevin Day’s ass), and they’d embarked on this something more right before school ended, but Andrew felt gooey inside at Neil’s words. Disgustingly gooey, he tried to tell himself, but he knew how much he liked it. Liked Neil.

“Let’s go to bed. It’s not like we were really making any progress anyway. One day I’m going to teach you how to actually play.”

Neil protested but shut his laptop all the same. Andrew put his aside as well and dragged himself onto his bed (making sure not to fall as he sometimes did, since that embarrassment was something he might not be able to come back from, even with Neil). He turned the brightness on his phone to 100% before flicking his own light off, so that his face was still illuminated on Neil’s screen; Neil’s was a little darker, but he could make out a hint of his features in the dark.

Despite his inability to fall asleep without talking to Andrew, Neil knocked out almost immediately as he always did when they facetimed. His eyes fluttered shut after a few minutes of gazing at Andrew, and his breathing evened out. Andrew turned the brightness down a little and shifted around until he was comfortable facing the wall and Neil.

He wondered if they would still do this when they were back to seeing each other everyday. His routine would change, which was never fun, but if Andrew got to see Neil in real life it would all be worth it. He never really smiled, but he felt a hint of one curving his lips as his eyes drifted shut.

[placetobenation]

Welcome to Seinfeld: The PTBN Series Rewatch! On a regular basis, JT Rozzero, Aaron George and Andrew Flanagan will watch an episode of TV’s greatest sitcom and provide notes and grades across a number of categories. The goal is to rewatch the entire series chronologically to see what truly worked, what still holds up today, what feels just a bit dated and yada, yada, yada it will be a great time. So settle into your couch with the cushions flipped over, grab a Snapple and enjoy the ride!

Best Character

JT: I liked Kramer the most here. He had some real funny lines and physical comedy throughout this one. His buried conversation enders are so good, especially slipping in that Newman was sleeping in Jerry’s bed. I also loved the delivery of his “for a fat man” line to Jerry. He was on his game in this one.

Aaron:  You’d think a pile of lesbians were fighting/lovemaking on stage if you were reading my mind, sifting through the depravity and listening to the “Jerry, Jerry, Jerry” chant. In an episode full of characters trying waaaaaay too hard, Jerry delivers with one liner after one liner. Imagine an episode where Jerry Seinfeld is the most grounded of the actors. This is it. Wait till you see the score.

Andrew: I think it was Elaine. The obsession with proving someone wrong, even at great cost to yourself, always gets me. Also, I’m a sucker for Elaine annoying people with a cigar.

Best Storyline

JT: I liked the blood the most. Jerry was annoying at points by being such an ungrateful bitch but he had some good dismissive lines and watching battle the Mandelbaums again was well done. And like I said above, I really enjoyed Kramer and this was the story he lived in for most of the episode. The meat sex stuff had funny moments but not much of a story to it and the Elaine stuff was fine too but didn’t have as many laughs.

Aaron: Polish, sausage, dancing.

Andrew: I’ll go with The Blood. I wasn’t a fan of any of the storylines, really, but the return of the Mandelbaums was my favorite part of the episode.

Ethical Dilemma of the Week

JT: If someone saves your life, you should probably not be a dick to them as soon as later that day.

Aaron: I’m going to go the opposite of JT and ask: even if you’ve saved someone’s life (which us debatable considering they were in a hospital full of blood) how do you live with yourself bringing a sworn enemy literally into someone’s bed? I get that these guys share a lot, but do they not even have a bed for that beast of a mailman to sleep in? If anything Kramer STILL owes Jerry favors for years of mooching and advantage taking. Has he ever borrowed that car without completely destroying it?

Andrew: What is the limit of the obligation when graciously accepting a gift from one’s parents? I’m going to say it’s somewhere short of “tying myself to a car”.

Relationship Scale (Scale 1-10)

JT: Kramer and Jerry, finally brought together by blood. A love made official. Relationship Grade: 3 Pints of Kramer/10

Aaron: George should keep banging that Vivian like a middle aged Neil Peart stuffing his face and trudging his way through YYZ. Relationship Grade: Boun ba ba boun ba baoun baoun baoun, ba ba baoun, ba ba baoun. Baoun badrrruuum. Down da down da down daaaaun. Dawn da down de daoun daounnnnnnn.

Andrew: I know the kid is presented as a burden, but I’m into the George and Vivian pairing. I just like the thought that there is a match for every kink out there. Relationship Grade: 10 sensual cured meats/10

What Worked:

JT: The plum diet seems like a good one; I always mark out for Morty saying “Mister Kramer”; Jerry’s point about responsibility is good one; George’s bus transfer excuse made me laugh; Jerry and George’s conversation about George bailing on Tara was really funny; Kramer going all in on calling Jerry fat in various ways was great; I enjoyed Elaine shoving Kramer into the bushes and smacking him with the broom as he yelped; I liked the payoff with the exacto knife, it was set up well earlier in the episode; Kramer demonstrating how he would rip out his kidney was great; Canadian Parliament; Newman sneaking in to watch the movie; Izzy putting the hurting on Jerry with his training was well done; the sausage making scene is a classic; Jerry calling George “Caligula”; Newman giving Jerry his blood was a good capper

Aaron: All of Jerry’s analysis and pleading with George to, for once think of someone’s else’s needs. The group screaming and Kramer’s messed up justification for needing to store so much blood in a blood bank. As someone who has watched Canadian parliament it busted me up to learn that Kramer not only watches, but records for later viewing. It’s not nearly as polite as one would imagine. Think more childish, with a lot of high pitched voices screeching “MISTER SPEAKER.” George’s series of lies, which inexplicably won over Vivian,  were great and the only thing that felt anywhere in the realm of reality.

Andrew: There’s not much to praise here, story-wise, but the episode still has some memorably great dialog. Kramer’s “for a fat man, you’re not very jolly” is excellent, and George and Jerry have some great back and forth in the diner (“I’m not suggesting getting rid of the girl”, followed by the “needs” line, is the high point for me). Elaine being compelled to prove her responsibility, and getting stuck with a permanent babysitting gig as a result, was well done. I enjoyed seeing the Mandlebaums again, and Kramer’s screen door callback got me.

What Didn’t Work

JT: Tara saying “love making”, eh; Jerry being so insanely afraid of Kramer’s blood was a bit much, just way too over the top; someone should pull a President Lincoln on that kid; I also thought Jerry was really ungrateful for Kramer’s blood, dude saved your life… stop being a bitch; who fucks a random at their kids’ birthday party?; The Izzy voiceovers at the end were terrible; why is Jimmy wearing that hat? Is it 1954?

Aaron: Is Jerry dead? They dragged him for a quarter mile which was way longer than it took to kill that dog in National Lampoon’s Vacation. This whole episode felt fake. If the paragraph above is what I felt worked then you can comfortably put the rest here. I know George has pulled some schemes but are we really to believe that a man whose entire mission in life has been to get laid, is now trading that for food and television? What kind of animal is this man? What’s wrong with Jerry? I get he’s a germaphobe, but he can’t be in a building with blood. A building???? Elaine would rather raise a child than tell a woman she barely seems to know or care about that she hates her son. Her son might be the most hateable character in western civilization. Even Kramer felt forced. I get he’s dumb, but blood in a car? Come on writers. Do better. I don’t want to go on any more. This was a mess. Also Mandelbaum sucked the high hard one.

Andrew: Vivian is wearing a gray pantsuit the first two times we see her, which seems pretty unimaginative. The dubbing of Mr. Mandlebaum’s dialogue at the end has always seemed really distracting to me.

Key Character Debuts

– Vivian

Iconic Moments, Running Themes & Memorable Quotes

– “That’s why we joined a program. We walk once around the block three times a week.” – Helen “And every morning I eat a plum.” – Morty

– “Did you give blood?” – Jerry “No, not giving. hoarding. I’m storing it in to a blood bank. Just in case.” – Kramer “In case of what?” – Jerry “Jerry, I know myself. If I’m out on the street and it’s starts to go down, I don’t back off until it’s finished.” – Kramer

– “I know, I’m glad I got to see him before he hit puberty and got, you know all lurchy and awkward.” – Elaine

– “Who wants to responsible? When ever anything goes wrong, the first thing they ask is: who’s responsible for this?” – Jerry

– “So, she didn’t appreciate the erotic qualities of the salted cured meats?” – Jerry “She tolerated the strawberries and the chocolate sauce, but eh, it’s not a meal, you know? Food and sex, those are my two passions. It’s only natural to combine them.” – George

– “Maybe instead of trying to satisfy two of your needs, how about satisfying one of somebody else’s.” – Jerry

– “You know, for a fat guy you’re not very jolly.” – Kramer

– “You? I’m more responsible than you are!” – Elaine “Don’t be ridiculous. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go to fill my freezer with my own blood.” – Kramer

– “Oh yeah, you’ve got three pints of Kramer in you, buddy.” – Kramer

– “She’s right, I heard Kramer got mugged out on the suburbs on a baby-sitting gig.” – Kramer

– “So, my blood is not enough. Would you like a kidney too, because I’ll give it to you? I’ll rip it out right here and stack it on the table!” – Kramer

– “So, the free love buffet is over?” – Jerry “I got greedy. Flew too close to the sun on wings of pastrami.” – Jerry “Yeah, that’s what you did…I can’t believe I got another session with Izzy Mandelbaum, he’s probably makes me box a kangaroo.” – Jerry

– “All right, Even Steven. Oh, by the way, when you get back to your apartment try to keep it down because Newman is taking a nap in your bed.” – Kramer

– “Yes it is. I find the pastrami to be the most sensual of all the salted cured meats. Hungry?” – Vivian

Oddities & Fun Facts

– Lloyd Bridges was nominated for an Emmy for his role as Izzy Mandelbaum

Overall Grade (Scale 1-10)

JT: This wasn’t the strongest episode we have watched and did fade at the end but there is some quality dialogue peppered all through this one. It is definitely an episode carried on the back of actors that know their characters and relationships on a top notch, deep level because it was often the timing and delivery that made the big lines pop. The Mandelbaum return was a nice surprise but that really just kind of ends too, as do all of the stories here. Nothing quite paid off in a satisfying way. Also, that stupid fucking hat that Vivian’s kid had on was obnoxious. Fuck him. I am off to box a kangaroo. Final Grade: 6/10

Aaron: This episode sucked. It felt like a different show devoid of the characters we know and love. The writing was forced and I feel worse for having watched this one. Final Grade: 1/10

Andrew: I didn’t really care for this one. None of the storylines do it for me, which makes it hard for me get into the episode. And there are no big moments to make up for the less-than-inspired writing. But there are some genuine laughs and quality dialogue to be found, so the episode isn’t a complete disaster. Final Grade: 6/10

[nickireadstfc]

The King's Men, Chapter 1 – Hello Foxhole, My Old Friend

In which the Foxes are introduced to Meat Grinder Neil, Nicky misses an opportunity for a memeworthy Christmas gift, we find out some things about Jean, and Andrew and Neil chill on a rooftop or whatever.

Sounds good? Then it’s time for Nicki to read The King's Men.

Hello hello hello, we’re back! Welcome to the one, the only, the glorious, all-surpassing, awe-inspiring, shade-throwing, capslock-inducing and feels-wrecking finale to this hell of a ride called All For The Game - welcome to The King's Men.

Let’s start at the very front: A cover, as always, says more than a thousand words, and this cover has one clear message it shouts in the faces of those familiar with the series, clear as day and ringing like a bell: IT'S SHOWDOWN TIME, FUCKERS.

Two Exy racquets, one orange, one black, crossed, clashing. The title, half-orange, half-black. Nora Sakavic' name at the bottom, also half-orange, half-black, menacingly laughing in my face like Rumpelstiltskin on crack, glee-drunk on my surely following future tears.

Whee-hee. Let’s fucking go.

(Also, the chapters are getting much longer by this book, so y'all will have to deal with these posts being longer as well. Soz.)

          Even after a semester at Palmetto State University and a couple weeks practicing on the largest Exy stadium in the United States, Neil was still struck breathless by the Foxhole Court.

Neil, my boy, you never disappoint. Even through hardship, bruises and cuts, one thing can always be relied on: Your gigantic boner for Exy. Get a room, you two.

          “It’s time to go,” Wymack said.

          That was enough to make Neil get up, although his battered body protested.

Oh yeah, quick reminder for anyone who might have forgotten (although – why the fuck would you ever): Neil is currently walking minced meat with Trauma Jetlag™, a literal prison tattoo, and #allnatural #naturaleyes #naturalhair #nomakeup #nofilter.

Because of that, he’s obviously not that keen on running into his squad at the moment. Can’t exactly blame the dude.

If I looked like Freddy Krueger with a facial tramp stamp, I wouldn’t go around instagramming selfies either.

Especially when I willingly ran into the arms of the dude who is nationally known for giving out facial tramp stamps.

          Wymack had even locked the office in his short absence. Neil had been in there enough times to know Wymack didn’t keep anything particularly valuable on his shelves. The only thing of any import was Neil’s duffel. (…) On Neil’s first day in South Carolina he had asked Wymack to protect his things, and seven months later Wymack was still keeping that promise. It was almost enough to make Neil forget all about Riko.

Guys, this just in: Wymack is still the best damn person alive. #dicksoutforwymack

The best damn person alive also already warned the Foxes Neil looked like a human punching bag in order to prevent them from having an actual heart attack when they see him. Yay, have fun explaining yourself to them, hombre.

          Matt moved soundlessly for a few moments before he finally managed to choked, “Jesus Christ, Neil.”

          “It’s not as bad as it looks,” Neil said.

This just in: Neil is Veronica from Heathers, minus the 80’s hair-do.

In order to fulfill his self-appointed role as Neil’s mother hen, Matt then swiftly goes and punches newly-arrived Kevin in the fucking face – which is generally a sentiment I can support, although it really is not his fault this time.

          Matt stared at him for an endless minute, then said, “I want to break [Riko’s] face in six places. If he ever comes within a thousand yards of you again –“

Same, Matt. Fucking SAME.

Matt being protective of Neil will never not give me a healthy dose of The Feels™.

One confrontation down, four to go: What do Aaron, Nicky and Kevin have to say to Mr Meat Grinder?

          Unsurprisingly, Aaron was the safest one to look at. (…) Neil gave him a moment to see if he’d ask, but all Aaron did was shrug.

Glad to see the usual amounts of sympathy and care coming from one half of the Minyard Murder Twins.

Although I’m doubting the other half will muster up any more affection.

          Nicky, on the other hand looked absolutely crushed as he took in Neil’s wrecked appearance. He reached out as soon as Neil was close enough and wrapped his hand around the back of Neil’s neck, (…) carefully pulling Neil up against him.

Also, glad to see the usual freaking normal reaction coming from Nicky, aka some goddamn comforting hugs for once in this cold, cold monster squad.

Nicky hugs are the best hugs.

          At least Kevin had the decency to speak in French. “Tell me the master didn’t approve this.”

Every time Kevin still calls Tetsuji “the master”, a little tiny thing inside my heart dies.

10/10 would protect my tiny big ass traumatized son.

          “Riko said he’d hurt us if I change it back. All I can do is duck my head and hope for the best.” (…)

          “How long do you think he’ll let you hide before he forces you to show [the tattoo] off? The press will be all over this (…). He’s trying to get you found.”

Well, duh.

I’m already looking forward to Neil regaining his confidence, and then I’m looking forward to him sassing the absolute everloving shit out of whoever tries to come for him for his appearance and tattoo.

          “He wouldn’t waste his time unless he thinks we really are going to be a problem for his team That means something, doesn’t it? (…) Kevin, you do what you do best and focus on Exy. Take us where he doesn’t want us to go.”

Hell effin yes.

We’re gonna fucking make it to finals, and we’re gonna fucking shoot that dumb Exy ball so hard around those Raven Fuckers’ heads that we shoot the asshole smirk right off Riko’s ugly face.

Yas.

          Nicky looked between them as if making sure they were done, then scooped his gift bags up again and held one out to Neil.

          “Belated Christmas present,” he said, a little sadly.

NICKY LET ME LOVE YOU.

Trust this dude to always bring the sunshine around at the end of the day.

          “I’ve got Andrew’s with me, too. Actually, I got you two the same thing because you are like the most impossible people in the world to buy for.”

Knives, hair dye, black T-Shirts, cigarettes, a coupon for an anger management course,… Andreil gift-shopping ain’t that hard, homie.

But scratch all that - Nicky got them each a winter coat!

This would have been even better if Nicky hadn’t gotten the same coat for each of them, but literally the same coat – because now all I can imagine is Neil and Andrew stuck in one coat like a Get Along Shirt.

If someone makes this into fanart, I will pay you in Ben & Jerry’s. I’m being dead serious.

Four reunions done and the most important one still to go – one road trip to Columbia later:

        “If you’ll sign in, I’ll ring Dr. Slosky and let him know you’re here.”

        (...) Neil was the only one who hesitated when his pen touched the paper. Riko hadn’t let him be “Neil” at Evermore. Every time Neil answered to it on the court, Riko beat him for it. (…) Riko wanted him to know how much trouble he’d caused the Moriyamas with all of his alibis.

Jesus fuck. Is there literally anything he didn’t get beat for at the Batcave of Extra?

Actually, don’t answer that.

Also, hate to be that person again but – shouldn’t he have gotten to that bit of trauma way earlier? Wymack and the Foxes called him Neil so many times already, why is this only kicking in now?

I legit don’t have an explanation and I think it may just be a continuity error. If anyone does have a good explanation, shoot me an ask.

They sit down to wait for Andrew and to everyone’s surprise (including mine), Kevin uses the wait to do something so incredibly out of character my figurative wig was instantly snatched:

Being a compassionate person.

        “I know what he’s like,” Kevin said. Neil looked at him, but Kevin was studying his hands. “Riko. If you want to talk.”

Fucking what.

        It was the most awkward and uncomfortable thing Kevin had ever said to him. Kevin was known for his talent, not his sensitivity. (…) That he tried at all was so unexpected Neil felt it like a balm to every bruised inch of his skin.

Oh my GOD.

HE’S TRYING, he’s trying to make Neil feel better, he just wants to help and to comfort him I’m gonna light myself the fuck on fire I can’t handle this.

These Kevin/Neil feels are ambushing me out of nowhere. I was almost over this dynamic, god damnit. What the fuck.

        “[Jean’s] father owed the Moriyamas a great deal. The master paid those debts in exchange for Jean’s presence on our court. He was property, nothing more. You are the same in their eyes. (…) I know it means he did not hold back.”

Wait – does this mean Jean initially got the same treatment that Neil just had to suffer through?

WELL, FUCK.

Jean Valjean has instantly risen in the ranks of my faves.

SWEET FRENCH SUMMER CHILD. YOU DID NOT DESERVE THIS WHAT THE FUCK.

No wonder he’s a (seemingly) heartless bitch now. Kill or be killed, I guess.

        “Were you ever going to tell [Coach that he’s your father]?”

        “I was going to when he signed me,” Kevin said. “I couldn’t. (…) [Tetsuji] has never raised a hand or voice against Coach before because Coach has never been a real threat to him. I didn’t know if a confession would change things. I couldn’t risk it.”

Kevin :’( protecting and caring for Wymack :’(( just like Wymack protected and cared for him :’((((((

Before I can get too emotional over this, though, the happy Kevin/Neil Honest Conversation™ is cut short by the arrival of everyone’s favourite murder maniac, minus the meds.

(Back at it again with the alliterations, y’all.)

        If Neil hadn’t known Andrew spent the last year and a half fiercely protective and territorial of Kevin, he’d think they were strangers. Andrew treated Kevin to a bored inspection, then flicked his fingers in dismissal.

Apparently, Andrew is not that different off his meds but continues to be a Stony Sinnamon Roll, Too Indifferent To This World, Too Dead Inside™. Well, bummer.

I don't know what I expected, since we did meet him sober before, but I think I thought when he'd be off his meds permanently he'd be... More? I guess? More of a person, I mean. Less walking void, and all that jazz.

Maybe he'll come around. Give the sinnamon roll some time.

Neil and the squad, finally complete again, drive back to campus, and as they get out we get a glimpse of something amazing we'll have more of later this chapter:

It's prime fucking Andreil time.

        [Neil] straightened and turned to find out Andrew had shifted closer. There was nowhere for Neil to stand except up against Andrew, but somehow Neil didn't mind. They'd been apart for seven weeks but Neil keenly remembered why he'd stayed. He remembered is unyielding, unquestioning weight that could hold him and all of his problems without breaking a sweat. For the first time in months he could finally breathe again. It was such a relief it was frightening; Neil hadn't meant to lean on Andrew so much.

ALL-FUCKING-RIGHT.

Alright alright alright. So NOT ONLY is this gay as shit as it is, and Neil is (whether he realises it or not) super fucking in love by this point, but - "Andrew had shifted closer", bitch, what.

Don't you dare tell me that boy isn't fucking infatuated with our favourite runaway drama queen.

In today's issue of The PSU Andreil Times: Heart-Eyed Little Shit Thinks He's Being Sneaky, Fails Miserably. More news on page 19.

When Neil is done waxing poetic about Andrew's ~strength~ and his ~*~unyiedling body~*~, he goes back to his dorm for part 2 of The Matt Confrontation:

        „Neil? We're here when you want to talk about it.“

        „I know.“

Is that... Neil... close to accepting actual help from outside...

Amazing.

        He knew just from looking at Matt that Matt would accept any truth Neil gave him right now, no matter how cruel or unbelievable. He'd done the right thing by going to Evermore; he was making the right choice in standing his ground here with the Foxes. (…) If [what happened] was the only way to keep his teammates safe from Riko's cruelty, it was an easy price to pay.

Okay ya brb while I drown myself in my own fucking tears.

FOX FAMILY. STOP RUINING MY FEELINGS. I'm supposed to be cool and witty here but I can't even do that because I'm just too emotional over this.

And the fun doesn't stop here, oh no.

Are you guys ready?

I know there are some people fidgeting excitedly in their seats right now because they know what's about to come up – the grand finale to a wonderful third-book-kick-off chapter:

The goddamn rooftop thing.

        Andrew turned to face him. „I'll take an explanation now.“

        „You couldn't ask for answers inside where it's warm?“ Neil asked.

Glad to see that even when faced with his (by now Confirmed™) crush, Neil still doesn't lose his sass.

But of course, Neil is not one to keep secrets from his murder boyfriend, and so he tells him of the Christmas Fuckery – which Andrew is decidedly not fucking liking, because of course Neil left Kevin's side and therefore kind of broke their deal.

Whoops.

        „Why did you go?“

        Neil didn't know if he could say it. Thinking about it was almost too much. Andrew was waiting, though, so Neil choked back his nausea. „Riko said if I didn't, Dr. Proust would-“

        Andrew clapped a hand over his mouth, smothering the rest of his words. (…) „Do not make the mistake of thinking I need your protection.“

Okay, but don't you, though?

Neil says it himself later on, and he's entirely correct: Andrew watches everyone's backs, who's gonna watch his?

He may be an expert in back-watching, but even the most back-watchiest back-watcher in the world can be out-back-watched, my dude. And who's gonna come rescue you then, hm? HMM??

Neil fucking will, of course.

        „The next time someone comes for you, stand down and let me deal with it. Do you understand?“

        „If it means losing you, then no.“

SHIT WHAT.

Since when are our boys so damn open with their love declarations?? This was so outta nowhere?? I'm fcukign?? Having a heart attack??

And following that – of course. The one, the only, the iconic:

        „I hate you,“ Andrew said casually. (…) „You were supposed to be a side effect of the drugs.“

        „I'm not a hallucination,“ Neil said, nonplussed.

        „You are a pipe dream,“ Andrew said.

BOY.

SHIT.

IM FCIKIGN FUCKKNGING FKUCKKVMFGNICHNNNKNX

The fact that Andrew thought his feelings (THAT ARE NOW CONFIRMED, I REPEAT, CONFIRMED ANDREW FEELINGS FOR NEIL HAVE BEEN SPOTTED) were a temporary thing, unreal, a side effect of being high out of his mind, is just like kind of, casually ruining my life. No biggie.

No fucking biggie.

Andrew quickly realizes he may have admitted too many feelings though, and in a feeble attempt to save his cold front and fragile masculinity, he throws Neil's keys off the roof, because just giving them back to him normally wouldn't have been Manly™ enough.

However Neil, once more, is able to show us that he can give as good as he gets (innuendo absolutely intended):

        Neil wasn't sure why he did it, but he plucked Andrew's cigarette off the sidewalk and stuck it between his lips. He tipped his head back to meet Andrew's unwavering gaze and tapped two fingers to his temple in Andrew's mocking salute. (…) It felt like a win, though Neil wasn't sure why.

Fucking hell.

These two are going to a) improve this last book exponentially and b) absolutely fucking ruin my life.

Nicki out.

As always: If you like what I do here and you want to help me continue writing fun things for you, please consider buying me a coffee. Every lil bit does absolutely help, getting me through uni and all that jazz. Thanks so much!!

[poltondrum90-blog]

Top 50 Cover Songs from Movies

Say Anythinghas In Your Eyes,Goodfellashas Layla,Apocalypse Nowhas The End, andFight Clubhas Where Is My Mind. These are established truths. But a cover song in a movie is different. It can actually elevate the drama - ascribing meaning and sentiment to the music being played. All of a sudden this song that we're pretty sure we've heard before is chewing the scenery and the actors fade into the background.

All too often, the cover song is tailor-made for the movie itself. If you recall the '90s, countless covers were contributed to movies just to fulfill some bureaucratic record contract quota, which is why you saw all kind of questionablepunk,ska,andnu metalcovers padding out these soundtracks and bands' setlists. Ahead, you'll find songs that (mostly) go beyond contractual obligations and, with the movie, help to carve out a nice little niche for each other in the pop culture canon.

Keep in mind that there are essentially three kinds of cover songs in this list: songs the movie desperately needed, songs the movie helped make, and songs that transcended the movie altogether. For instance, Hole song might be the only redeemable part of a film, an Eagles song made into a rumba might define scene, and a Neil Diamond cover might just become the quintessential version of the song. So, grab your headphones, heat up some popcorn, and relish these 50 covers.

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50. The Ballad of Peter Pumpkinhead

Dumb and Dumber (1994)

Performed By: Crash Test Dummies

Originally By: XTC

Peter Pumpkinhead came to town/ Spreading wisdom and cash around, or so the story tells us. Fans of classic Farrelly Brothers comedy Dumb and Dumber know that dimwitted Harry Dunne and Lloyd Christmas also came to Aspen dropping Benjamins. As far as wisdom, eh, they'll have to write you an IOU. However, one thing we do know for sure is the filmmakers were wise to invite the cover-friendly Crash Test Dummies along for arguably the stupidest road trip in film history. They chop a verse from XTC's original hit from two years prior, but keep the song's ironic spirit intact. Most memorably, backup Dummies vocalist Ellen Reid sings lead with Brad Roberts' three-testicle baritone surfacing on choruses - and absolutely smashes it. There was such hope for the single that Jeff Daniels even reprised his role as Harry in the music video, which relates Peter's story. Whether it's XTC or CTD, it's fair to say that we like this song a lot. Matt Melis

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49. Desolation Row

Watchmen (2009)

Performed By: My Chemical Romance

Originally By: Bob Dylan

In a film full of musical choices both pitch-perfect (The Times They Are A Changin' over the world-setting prologue) and highly suspect (slow humping to Leonard Cohen!), My Chemical Romance's cover of another Dylan classic sits somewhere squarely between the two. Yet for whatever you might have to say about Zach Snyder's interpretation of the medium-defining graphic novel, it's hard to say that the furious opening riffs of this modern update aren't immensely satisfying over the final image of Rorschach's journal, waiting to destroy the false new social order that the titular group of heroes chose to leave in their wake. Dominick Suzanne-Mayer

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48. Mustang Sally

The Commitments (1991)

Performed By: The Commitments

Originally By: Mack Rice

Before there was Sing Street, there was The Commitments. Back in 1991, Alan Parker's Irish-British-Americanmusicalcomedy was one of the hippest movies around. For nearly two hours, you could escape overseas and hang out with larger-than-life characters like Deco Cuffe, Outspan Foster, or Jimmy Rabbitte as they got their shit together to create great music. They were a total mess, but that's what made their story so intriguing. They were a bunch of local losers trying their darnedest to be, as Rabbitte later says, the hardest-workin' band in the world. That try fuels their Robert Palmer-esque cover of Mustang Sally, a bluesy culmination of all their sweat, energy, and emotion, the likes of which are led by Andrew Strong's Kentucky bourbon-glazed vocals and Glen Hansard's silver licks. Ah, who are we kidding, this movie's still hip as hell.Michael Roffman

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47. Any Major Dude Will Tell You

Me, Myself, & Irene (2000)

Performed By: Wilco

Originally By:Steely Dan

Packed with '90s radio mainstays from Third Eye Blind to Hootie & The Blowfish the soundtrack to Me, Myself & Irene seems no different from any other early Farrelly Brothers movie. But like the film itself, there's a disarming pathos beneath the surface, mainly in the form of eightcount 'em, eightSteely Dan covers. Unsurprisingly, Wilco best pulls off the Dan's sugar-coated subversiveness with their take on Any Major Dude Will Tell You, most likely due to their own experience with burying weird-ass lyrics beneath laid back arrangements. The flirting organs of Leroy Bach and the late Jay Bennett allow lines like Have you ever seen a squonk's tears? to go down like honey. It's a lawnchair gem that would fit in on any of the band's last three albums. Dan Caffrey

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46. Sweet Child o' Mine

Big Daddy(1999)

Performed By: Sheryl Crow

Originally By: Guns N' Roses

Big Daddy is hardly a movie. Have you watched it recently? The whole thing plays out like an extended music video; or rather, a string of vignettes taped together by popular FM hits from that era and the years prior. It's a direct bi-product of the TRL Generation, and there isn't a single frame of the film that suggests it's anywhere but 1999. All things considered, there are a few gems on the soundtrack - from Garbage's When I Grow Up to Big Audio Dynamite's Rush - but the most memorable takeaway is Sheryl Crow's inspired cover of Guns N' Roses' Sweet Child o' Mine. Gone is any trace of the song ever being a hard rock anthem and in its place is a sunny country ballad that fits snugly in Crow's oeuvre. Today, she sings it better than Axl Rose does and we're okay with that.Michael Roffman

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45. Did You Ever See A Dream Walking

Lady in White (1988)

Performed By: Bing Crosby

Originally By:Art Jarret

Many scary movies associate their ghost or murderer with a popular song. A Stir Of Echoes had Paint It Black, Halloween II used Mr. Sandman, and you can guess what tune popped up in Jeepers Creepers. But the most unnerving instance of musical terror belongs to Lady In White, a little-seen, coming-of-age/horror tale starring an adolescent Lukas Haas. I won't spoil exactly how the song comes into play here, but opting for Bing Crosby's take of Did You Ever See A Dream Walking? over Art Jarrett's initial version was a smart move on the filmmaker's part. Whereas Jarrett's rendition seems like the logical choice with its tinny, melancholy tone, Uncle Bing's fireside baritone is downright cheery, providing eerie juxtaposition to the events onscreen. Dan Caffrey

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44. Easy

Baby Driver (2017)

Performed By: Sky Ferreira

Originally By: The Commodores

For all of the killer tracks on display throughout Edgar Wright's exercise in kickass songs and flawless action choreography, it's one of the sweetest songs that also ends up mattering most. Baby might have a lot of mixes, but it's the golden-edged tape with Mom scrawled on the site that he'd put his life in danger to recover: a lilting take on Easy by his deceased mother (ahem, Sky Ferreira). Not everything goes the way Baby would hope by film's end, but through it all, he's still easy like Sunday morning. Dominick Suzanne-Mayer

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43. Such Great Heights

Garden State (2004)

Performed By: Iron & Wine

Originally By:The Postal Service

Thealready-precious Such Great Heights is made rice-paper fragile by Sam Beam for the one soundtrack that had youths everywhere confusing privilegeddisaffection with clinical depression. Nevertheless, the whisper of Beam on the wind turns a bubbly digi-love song into an intimate ballad. This isn't the one that will change your life, but it's now the marquee song for visiting your childhood home, staring at the artifacts of your past, and thinking about how it all used to be so goddamn simple. Jeremy D. Larson

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42. Gold Dust Woman

The Crow: City of Angels (1996)

Performed By: Hole

Originally By: Fleetwood Mac

Look, there never should have been a sequel to The Crow. But, you can't argue that City of Angels director Tim Pope didn't at least try to do something different with James O'Barr's gothic graphic novel. His grimy 1996 sequel turns Los Angeles into a bone-dry, urine-colored shithole, a far cry from the stormy, slippery Detroit that Alex Proyas conceived of two years prior. Still, the similarities were obvious, especially the sequel's attempt to capture the magic of its predecessor's soundtrack, and to its credit, the film comes dangerously close. PJ Harvey, Iggy Pop, Deftones, White Zombie, Bush, and Filter all contribute admirable tracks, though the real standout was Hole's cover of Fleetwood Mac's Gold Dust Woman. Coming off of Live Through This, Courtney Love brings her fuck you attitude front and center, turning the classic rock hit into a grunge-y stomper. Purists be damned, but it's exactly the type of song you want to hear if you're avenging the death of your son on All Saints' Day. Michael Roffman

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41. Degenerated

Airheads (1994)

Performed By: The Lone Rangers

Originally By: Reagan Youth

Sometimes a song makes a movie. And sometimes a songis the movie. Just imagine an Airheads where Chazz, Rex, and Pip spin their Long Rangers demo on air for all the guppies listening to Ian the Shark and it actually is just Pip farting on a snare drum. Even Milo would have to agree the three (not to mention the movie) would each look like half a butt puppet (so, um, one and a half butt puppets). Luckily, the film's creative team opted to re-record Degenerated, an early '80s punk song by hardcore band Reagan Youth. No, that's White Zombie, not Pip and Rex, backing Brendan Fraser on vocals, but the results are some first-class mid-'90s powerslop (not that we like to label things) that could pass as a legit demo and, more importantly, get heads banging. While the song turned out well for both Airheads and The Lone Rangers, you gotta wonder if Kayla will ever catch on that Chazz totally didn't write this for her. Matt Melis

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[gokinjeespot]

off the rack #1161

Monday, May 1, 2017

 It's a great week to be a geek. The TV adaptation of Neil Gaiman's "American Gods" starts airing now. Thursday, May 4th is Star Wars Day. The "Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2" movie opens in theatres on Friday, May 5th. Saturday the 6th is FREE COMIC BOOK DAY. Sunday the 7th is another CAPITAL TRADE SHOW at the Jim Durrell Arena where Jee-Riz Comics & Appraisals will be hawking their wares. Fly your geek flags high.

 Ben Reilly: The Scarlet Spider #1 - Peter David (writer) Mark Bagley (pencils) John Dell (inks) Jason Keith (colours) VC's Joe Caramagna (letters). This follows the "Clone Conspiracy" debacle as Ben tries to start a new life in Sin City. If you like your Spider-Man a little bit unethical then this book is for you. Ben also talks to imaginary people which can make for some confusion but it's a quirk that sets him apart from the other Spider-Men. I don't know if I'll keep up with this mentally unstable version but I like his new costume a lot.

 Batman & The Shadow #1 - Scott Snyder & Steve Orlando (writers) Riley Rossmo (art) Ivan Plascencia (colours) Clem Robins (letters). A murder in Gotham City sets Batman on the hunt for the killer with the victim's name giving us a clue to who that might be. Lamont Cranston's death leads Bruce to the Alps to visit an old teacher after some detective work talking to old associates of The Shadow. I liked how the similarities between the two dark crime fighters make this an interesting chess game between two masters of mainpulation. I wonder what the motive was if The Shadow did indeed kill his own descendant. Maybe the rest of this 6-issue mini will reveal the truth.

 Big Moose #1 - This double sized one-shot features Archie Comic's iconic dumbbell jock Marmaduke AKA Moose Mason. I did not know that he had the same name as a comic strip great dane, and I don't mean Scooby Doo. The first story "Moose vs. the Vending Machine" by Sean Ryan (writer) Cory Smith (art) Matt Herms (colours) & Jack Morelli (letters) is your typical dumb jock story that would fit right in an old Pep comic from the fifties. The second story "Have It All" by Ryan Cady (writer) Thomas Pitilli (art) Glenn Whitmore (colours) & Jack Morelli (letters) shows a more intelligent Moose juggling all of his stressful high school responsibilities. I felt for the guy, especially his struggle with an English lit paper. It made me suspect that Moose might be dyslexic. The last story "The Big Difference" by Gorf (writer) Ryan Jampole (art) Kelly Fitzpatrick (colours) & Jack Morelli (letters) has Moose making a new friend that's a little "after school special" but the kids will get the message. All in all a nice feature of a minor Archie character.

 No World #1 - Scott Lobdell (writer) Jordan Gunderson (pencils) Mark Roslan & Charlie Mok (digital inks) JUANCHOo (colours) Zen (letters). I picked this off the rack to read because of the sexy hot cover by Jordan Gunderson & Peter Steigerwald. Plus, Scott Lobdell wrote some comic books that I used to like. This one did not impress me. The Aspen Comics imprint seems to cater to good girl art fans, of which I am one, but a comic needs more than just T&A to keep me reading. I wasn't given enough information about the two main good girls in this debut to care about them so I won't continue reading.

 Wonder Woman #21 - Greg Rucka (writer) Liam Sharp (art) Laura Martin with Hi-Fi (colours). Part 4 of "The Truth" finds Veronica Cale getting ever closer to finding Themyscira and saving her daughter. I am looking forward to the conclusion of this story in Wonder Woman #23 to see what Ares' role is.

 The Old Guard #3 - Greg Rucka (writer) Leandro Fernandez (art) Daniela Miwa (colours) Jodi Wynne (letters). Two of the five team members are in the clutches of the bad guys so it's three to the rescue. This issue is a great example of a good writer making you care about the characters. Part of it has the origin story of one of the mercenaries. Another part shows how much two of the members care about each other. There's plenty of action over many pages beautifully illustrated by Leandro but also lots of action we don't see that is clearly implied in just one panel. That's good comic books.

 Deadpool vs. Punisher #2 - Fred Van Lente (writer) Pere Perez (art) Ruth Redmond (colours) VC's Joe Sabino (letters). Round two has 'Pool and 'Pun in a shoot out with the Don of the Dead, a crazy Mexican bad guy as deranged as Deadpool. Round three next issue should be fun with a new bad guy who you'll recognise right away. I can't wait

 Action Comics #978 - Dan Jurgens (writer) Carlo Barberi (pencils) Matt Santorelli (inks) Hi-Fi (colours) Rob Leigh (letters). Part 2 of "The New World" continues the review of Superman's origin story including his romance with Lois Lane and the birth of their son Jonathan. The identity of the villain is also revealed. What he has planned for the Man of Steel isn't anything new but it never gets old.

 Kill or be Killed #8 - Ed Brubaker (writer) Sean Phillips (art) Elizabeth Breitweiser (colours). Being spotted by the police while killing his last victim has complicated Dylan's life. It seems like every law enforcement officer is looking for him, which makes it even more difficult to find and kill someone else to keep the demon at bay. This could be the end of our killer vigilante.

 The Mighty Thor #18 - Jason Aaron (writer) Russell Dauterman (art) Matthew Wilson (colours) VC's Joe Sabino (letters). In part 4 of "The Asgard/Shi'Ar War" the Shi'Ar gods Sharra and K'ythri act like a couple of spoiled brats and decide to unleash their ultimate weapon to destroy the universe. The opening pages have the good guys seeking help from one of my favourite mutants. Russell's art is crazy good and he's close to Geof Darrow in the details that he puts on a page. When the force unleashed can take out The Destroyer in the blink of an eye you know the good guys are in deep doo-doo.

 Detective Comics #955 - James Tynion IV (writer) Marcio Takara (art) Marcelo Maiolo (colours) Sal Cipriano (letters). I was enjoying this issue right up until the very last page. It's one of those deus ex machina moments that I better get an explanation of or else "League of Shadows" will be the Detective Comics story that benches this book.

 Josie & The Pussycats #6 - Cameron Deordio & Marguerite Bennett (writers) Audrey Mok (art) Kelly Fitzpatrick (colours) Jack Morelli (letters). I loved the Michael Allred cover. I really appreciate that all the ad pages were gathered at the back so that we get to read an uninterrupted story. This is one comic book that I read just for fun.

 The Wild Storm #3 - Warren Ellis (writer) John Davis-Hunt (art) Steve Buccellato (colours) Simon Bowland (letters). If Aspen Comics had done as good a job as these people in redefining their cast of characters I would endorse their books. Here we have a fire fight that's even prettier than the one in The Old Guard #3 thanks to the work of John Davis-Hunt. New readers should not be afraid to pick this series up because it's got cool characters and Warren Ellis always entertains.

 Elektra #3 - Matt Owens (writer) Juann Cabal (art) Antonio Fabela (colours) VC's Cory Petit (letters). It's all out action as Elektra battles through Murderworld. Just when you think she's won her freedom, Arcade springs another surprise. He never fights fair. I really like the covers by Elizabeth Torque and would love to see a comic book drawn by her.

 Old Man Logan #22 - Jeff Lemire (writer) Eric Nguyen (art) Andres Mossa (colours) VC's Cory Petit (letters). Looks like Jeff is showing us Logan's greatest hits as he winds down work on this title. Maybe it will make some fans buy a few trades.

 Hulk #5 - Mariko Tamaki (writer) Nico Leon (art) Matt Milla & Andrew Crossley (colours) VC's Cory Petit (letters). I read recently that fans won't buy a Hulk comic book unless it's Bruce Banner as the big green galoot. Those fans are narrow minded and don't deserve to be called comic book fans. This book is great and has made the Hulk interesting to me again. I don't care who the Hulk is or who Iron Man is as long as there's a good story and nice art for the book. It's been 5 issues of this title hitting the racks and we haven't really seen the Hulk once. It doesn't matter because this story about Jennifer coping with the recent changes in her life is a good one.

 Infamous Iron Man #7 - Brian Michael Bendis (writer) Alex Maleev (art) Matt Hollingsworth (colours) VC's Clayton Cowles (letters). See, this is how you make a major change in an iconic character so that fans will want to read the book and not feel sick to their stomachs. I love this new version of Victor Von Doom. Brian has shown him evolving into the Infamous Iron Man instead of what happened with Captain America seemingly out of the blue saying "Hail Hydra". Here's another character that's been made interesting again and I will promote this title to anyone looking to read a good comic book.

 Ms. Marvel #17 - G. Willow Wilson (writer) Takeshi Miyazawa (art) Ian Herring (colours) VC's Joe Caramagna (letters). Okay, I don't get how Ms. Marvel and her friends defeated Doc.X but maybe it's because I'm an old luddite. I don't have a cell phone and barely know what apps are. I did appreciate the group hug that started this issue because I grew up in the sixties and that's what we wanted to do back then too.

 Star Wars: Darth Maul #3 - Cullen Bunn (writer) Luke Ross (art) Nolan Woodard (colours) VC's Joe Caramagna (letters). This young disciple of the Sith is a lot less interesting than I first thought. He is merely motivated by his hatred of the Jedi and that's seems to be all that he's about. One dimensional characters aren't that interesting. It's the evil auctioneer that is making me stick to this story.

 The Totally Awesome Hulk #18 - Greg Pak (writer) Mahmud Asrar (art) Nolan Woodard (colours) VC's Cory Petit (letters). The evil aliens find out what happens when their food fights back. Amadeus showed a side of him that surprised me and made me like this Hulk even more.

 Doctor Strange #19 - Jason Aaron (writer) Chris Bachalo (pencils) John Livesay, Victor Olazaba, Al Vey, Jaime Mendoza, Tim Townsend & Wayne Faucher (inks) Chris Bachalo (colours) VC's Cory Petit (letters). Yay, Wong is saved from Misery but I might be miserable after the next issue because it will be Jason Aaron and Chris Bachalo's last.

 Weapon X #2 - Greg Pak (writer) Greg Land (pencils) Jay Leisten (inks) Frank D'Armata (colours) VC's Joe Caramagna (letters). The bad guys are on the Warpath and the mutant super hero is outnumbered. Sabretooth and Old Man Logan are still free but it looks like that won't last. Once Greg adds in the Domino effect the gang will all be here. I like Greg Land's art a lot more with Jay's inks.

 Invincible Iron Man #6 - Brian Michael Bendis (writer) Stefano Caselli (art) Marte Gracia (colours) VC's Clayton Cowles (letters). RiRi meets with Stark Industries, M.I.T. and last but not least The Champions. I'm most excited about her possibly joining the young super hero team. I wish Marvel would find a way to change the title to Ironheart. RiRi has been wearing the armour for a while now and calling this book Iron Man is just awkward.

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