#dude this issue is making me fuckin nuts in the best way

[hood-ex]

Dick got his legs burned by acid!! And nearly!! Bled out!! Let's go!!

Batman/Superman: World's Finest #15

[og-danny-dorito]

Spock NSFW Headcanons

these were requested by @jxrdqn, who you should go check out because i like their hair color i can tell they're pretty cool. also, forgive me if these suck, i'm lowkey out of practice. they're also kindof short, although i may add more later down the line

N S F W :

- it's me, back at it again with that self-projecting-onto-characters-i-share-1(one)-similarity-with shit and spock is the PERFECT candidate for these cause i got a lot to say bitch

- SO, to start, mans isn't very experienced because sex is literally mind melding for vulcans. when you've gotta pick someone to like literally share your brain with, you're not just gonna go handing it out to people, yknow? so beforehand he's going to sit you down and have a conversation with you and explain vulcan anatomy and all that stuff

- he's always been kind of reserved, and so he doesn't seem to be hellbent of doin the nasty. in fact, he's probably not the one to bring it up first anyway

- that said Pon Farr hits him like a fuckin bus

- seriously, he's normally so reserved and poised, but when Pon Farr comes around he literally calls in sick and stays in bed all day because he can't get a hold of himself

- he's fidgety, restless even, and he finds himself sweating a little. he might avoid you completely if you haven't ever done anything like that with him before, but when you're next to him? lord save his soul

- it's not that hard to tell that's he's struggling to keep himself off of you, and he even gets a little snappy. touching him just makes it worse, and if the circumstances are right he would very much like it if you- ehem -alleviated him of his condition

- since he doesn't have too much experience under his belt he's probably a little bit ignorant on the topic of kinks. at first he denies he has any, says that it's not really necessary and that they're pointless, but when you convince him to try some things out? oh boy

- the only issue is getting him to admit them.

- in fact, he's so self conscious that he denies himself the satisfaction of initiating anything when he's feeling A Particular Way or just missing that feeling in general. he feels gross for desiring more than he has and it makes him think that's he's selfish for not being content

- but telling him that he's worth a lot to you makes him feel irrationally more self conscious due to his immediate assumption of pity from you. and so the best way, obviously, is to show him how much he means to you

- like yes, kiss him all over and nip at his ears he loves that shit and while you're at it cradle his face in your hands while you're riding him he will be this 👌 close to loosing his shit the whole time

- he's actually not that hard to turn on because he's VERY sensitive around his ears and neck. like, hypersensitive. kissing at his neck while you're in public makes his face and ears go all green and it's no wonder his nickname is “greenbean”

- but the thing is that he's never been big on pda, since it's seen as indecent in his culture. hand-holding is even considered indecent since it's like a whole casual makeout sesh so it's probably gonna take him a bit to do anything like that

- that a he's got more nerves in his hands due to vulcan physiology and so they're very sensitive as well

- so i have a lot of headcanons about vulcan erogenous zones but like to skim it down here's my chart that rates the levels of sensitivity for vulcans:

(red is instant-boner zone, orange is “u tryna get a little frisky” zone, and yellow is “maybe if imagination and/or pon farr is involved but otherwise whatever” zone)

- now notice how the ears, neck, eyelids, hands, abdominal sections, thighs, and pectorals are the most sensitive. vulcans usually wear a lot of clothing that is modest, and more often than not you can see that the neck is covered. its very sensitive and so since it was once practical it's more fashionable with that blast to the past thing with slightly tribal roots

- but sweet jesus is he sensitive in those areas, even without the whole protection from fighting thing

- he will take it to his grave before he admits that he likes a little bit of marking and roughness. that sort of stuff is looked down upon on vulcan, and so he's generally shameful of it. but if you bite this dude while he's railing you against the bed board he might just nut right then and there

- likes scratching too, and likes to have the pain from them the next day as a reminder

- he's not the type to be very loud during the whole thing but when he's getting particularly desperate for that high you're chasing he's definitely going to growl a little and then deny it literally two seconds afterwards

- he can be surprisingly rough, but only with your consent. the thing he wants the least is hurting you without your permission because he views it as a sign of betraying your trust and that can and will fuck him up. like he said already self conscious but having you hate him because he accidentally hurt you? scares the shit out of him

- he does like the idea of resistance as well but he's afraid he won't get the message and take it too far and he'll ruin everything so he just,,,avoids it

- it's one of a the few things he leaves unresolved to resonate, but if you're into that he will be a little more encouraged to approach you about it

- bdsm might not be his thing at first, but he finds himself becoming accustomed to it quickly, merely stating how he can see why people like it rather than saying he does directly

- oral also may not be his thing but after having some experience with it he's more inclined to give rather than receive just because he's that kinda dude. he wants to focus on pleasuring you since really he views you as the ultimate pripority here, even taking your experience above his and doing his best to please you (which i'm sure is more than enough, he's a quick learner)

- on the topic of pleasure specifically, i'd say that he's a switch but mostly a top considering he likes to feel like he's got a hold of something. that, and he likes to put you above him in that aspect so expect him to literally make sure you hit your climax like 5 time starts before settling down

- during his climax his eyes might screw shut and he'll clench his teeth, but that's pretty much it. he might also groan a little but like i said he doesn't really make a lot of noise besides the occasional growl

- he's around 7 inches in length and a pretty good girl of 6.9 inches exactly all around. probably curves towards his abdomen when erect, only vulcans have retractable dicks so when its out its curvin. it also turns a very interesting shade of fleshy green, and the two veins that run down to bottom pulse whenever youre touching him. pretty clean cut and all-around is very embarrassed at any point in time that he's being stared at when hes completely exposed

- nOW for my favorite part, mischellaneous headcanons ;

had no idea what the bdsm meant and lowkey was pretty sure it was a food before being further informed that it was in fact not a food

he blushes a whole lot, and he gets all quiet when he's feeling particularly pent up or turned on

most likely pansexual, since some alien species don't have a set binary or have multiple definitions for orientations, so it's easier just to say that you like pretty people rather than getting into the specifics

i would assume that he has no pubic hair because of vulcans not really growing much hair in general, so you won't have an issue navigating down there

probably thinks that seeing you mad is hot and he literally has no fucking idea why

like seriously if you're fucking livid and like fighting someone at the same time he may just want you to use any remaining rage on him in the bedroom no cap

- to spock, sex is something that requires trust and thought beforehand, and it might take him a while to adjust to some things because of those ideals that have been imposed on him since childhood. it's up to you to help him explore and figure it all out, and in the end it's worth it, promise

- he loves you, and while he doesn't think of sex as everything, he certainly loves that you trust him enough to do so with him of all people

[chicago-reeed]

Detroit Evolution

So

These are some notes that I took while I watched DE for the first time. It’s a lot. Like, six pages, a lot. I decided I should probably spare everyone’s dashboards and put it under a cut.

Warning: overuse of the fuck word because I am a dramatic little shit who gets overwhelmed easily

- Alright here we go. I don’t know if I’m mentally prepared to go through this hhhhh

- THE CINEMATOGRAPHY I NUT

- fuck he smellin the flowers good

- “hey tin can :P” “good morning gavin :P”

- I’m actually fucking crying IVE HAD TO PAUSE SO MANY TIMES JUST TO BREATHE AND IM ONLY AT 1:25

- FUCK ITS 1:27 AND HES FIXING HIS COLLAR HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO WATCH THIS WHEN MY VISION IS BLURRY WITH TEARS

- “I don’t need to breathe” BAZINGA

- *slaps my face repeatedly* keep it together bitch

- “I like the way you look<3” aaaaaaaaannd here I go again

- HAHAHA HE WAS DAYDREAMING SAME NINES SAME

- oh god oh god witty banter WITTY BANTER I CANT FUNCTION

- C H R I S  IM SCREAMING

- detective motha fuckin chris I don’t need to see any more I got what I came for

- Honestly all they need to do to calm down the protestors is get nines out there so he can say “please stop you’re being very mean >:/“ and they would probably just go home ngl

- “I’ve never been intimidated by people who hate androids” OH MY GOD NINES WITH THE BAZINGA’S TODAY WHAT A LEGEND

- can I just say the white jacket is such a power move I can’t believe nines invented fashion

- Gavin bein soft and reaching back for Nines in the crowd🥺homygod

- Gavin “no one calls him plastic but ME” Reed

- The only time I will support police brutality™️

- Gavin is so OP we stan

- Nines “you raise a fist, then I get PISSED😡” RK900

- “y’all have a nice day” Protect Detective Chris Miller at all costs

- Nines sees Gavin’s scars as charming PUT ME TO DEATH

- ADA OH LORD SHES STUNNING IM SOBBING

- Okay I need to pause and breathe again the cinematography got me chokin

- Uh ooohhh someone is jeeaaalouus😛

- Nines really said “no worry fam I’ll airdrop the case files to u”

- Ada: *exists*

- me: I hope this doesn’t awaken anything in me

- HA GAV DEFINITELY JEALOUS RIP

- And nines back at it again with the sass I AM LIVING

- Chris and Gavin’s reactions to Nines imitating Ada is the best thing I’ve seen all year

- “I can do your voice too” HIS FACE IMDBDHDJKDJD CRYIGGGSBSN

- oh ;-; shit Michael really finna make me cri

- God damn the intro credits are so beautiful

- TINAAAAAAA BABYYYYY

- Real coffee hours with the sharktreuse mug🦈

- “our boy” SHIT IM CRYING AGAIN

- Tina knows Gavin was absolutely feral before Nines appeared at the DPD

- Half An Asshole squad please stand up we ride at dawn

- Gavin with the knockoff timbs WE STAN😎

- maybe “thank god, I hate you, you love me, move your feet, oop” will be our always

- I’m living for the whole “criminal minds” vibe goin on here

- Bruh Gavin got the hook-ups fr fr

- ❤️WITTY BANTER WITTY BANTER WITTY BANTER W❤️

- The level of reed900 is staggering

- I’ve had to pause and breathe so many times it’s pathetic I’m not even 15 mins in

- GAVIN SAID mwah<3🖕IM FUCKING DIED

- 850% godt damn Nines got that IOS 50 update

- NINES PUT CHRIS’ PROMOTION PARTY IN THE CALENDAR WHAT A GOOD DAD

- maybe “our calendar” will be our always

- Chris “wingman of the year” Miller

- Who’s that Pokémon??? It’s JEALOUS GAV

- The way Nines said “I don’t feel anything for her.” I see you bud

- insecure Gavin needing reassurance™️

- Im fucking dying I fucking died bro BRO WE ALL KNOW WHO YOURE TALKING ABOUT, NINES, WE ALL KNOW

- Asexual Nines FTW👊😤👏👏👏❤️He gives zero fucks of ANY kind

- AN ANGEL HAS APPEARED WITH A GLOWY BLUE SCARF

- BREAKING NEWS: affection-starved Gavin™️ is literally begging for love

- GAVIN REED STOP BEING MEAN TO GAVIN REED OR ELSE

- “But there’s much more to admire about you than to detest, I think.”<333

- JJ not being suspicious at all nope no way Jose

- Lazzo has said two words and I love him already

- I don’t think I’ve seen this episode of COPS before🤔🤔🤔

- We all know Nines secretly wants to wear those fun glasses

- “Officer I swear I’ve never seen that arm in my life, it’s my friend’s he just asked me to hold it for him, Android arm what android arm heh”

- “Like robot arms, not gun arms.” You’re doing great sweetie🥰

- HAND TOUCH HAND TOUCH HAND TOUCH H

- Chris “the interrogator” Miller😎

- THE CINEMATOGRAPHY

- soft n sleepy gav™️ is soft n sleepy

- FUCKING SLEEVELESS SWEATSHIRT IVE BEEN TALKING ABOUT GAV IN A SLEEVELESS SWEATSHIRT FOR SO LONG AND NOW IT’S REAL IM

- You can wear my😋😘sweeaatshiiiirt😝😁🤗 (I’m sorry I had to)

- inconspicuous loving glances™️

- #GiveAndroidsFuckinHealthcare2K20

- AAAHHHHHHHH I CANTT BREAF

- HEAD>ON>SHOULDER

- INCONSPICUOUS LOVING GLANCES™️

- Gavin has not slept in 80 years

- He really said “I’m fine” BITCH

- Bed time for brats™️ no later than 8:30pm

- hell yeah sleepover time

- “stop lookin at my insides n shit” I want that on a t shirt

- ANDROID DREAMS

- Nines is so soft I might die

- But he’s somehow equally suave as fuck how is this fair

- Oh my god dream!gavin is like Nines’ conscious this is so presh

- “What do you think Gavin was gonna say?” nsndJSKDOFIWKDBDNDNSJDBBDJDJDJDNDJXJNDIFUIFIEKWN HES STILL THINKING ABOUT THEIR CONVO

- dream!gavin you sly dog

- “To have this. Out there.” DONT FUCK WITH MY HEART LIKE THAT THIS INNER-MONOLOGUE FLUFF IS SO SWEET

- Nines being insecure™️

- Listen to dream!gavin, Nines, he has big brain

- The fact that Nines subconsciously KNOWS that irl!Gav “just wants someone that doesn’t hate him” but he’s STILL like alas, I can never be what gavin needs :’(

- nu babie don’t be sad🥺

- oh my god they’re both train wrecks protect them at all cost

- c r i p e s❤️the reed900 hurt/comfort we all needed

- FUCK

- Concerned boyfriends™️

- Maybe “I’m fine” will be our always

- GAV🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺💔💔💔💔💔💔

- Insecure boyfriends™️

- Nines “I’m not going to get any closer to Gavin because I can’t help him but also I want to cuddle with him because he had a nightmare” RK900

- did someone say  c a t

- dumb babie gav jus spoon the dumb android so you both feel better

- Me: *rubs evil hands together* aha here comes the angst

- cue tragic backstory

- oh

- tragic backstory indeed

- YES DAD!FOWLER WE LOVE

- Gavin is so desperate for anyone to care about him I’m crying tears

- SHIT IT’S CUDDLE TIME™️ NOW IM REALLY FUCKING CRYING

- Alexa this is so god damn sad play despacito

- YES

- HAND>HOLDING

- HEAD>ON>SHOULDER

- NINES’ SKIN RETRACTING WHERE THEIR HANDS ARE TOUCHING THIS IS LIKE EVERY REED900 STAN’S DREAM COME TRUE

- Oh shit it’s about to get domestic I don’t think I’m mentally prepared

- YOU CAN WEAR MY😝💪SWEEAATSHIIIIIIRT🤪🔥🔥🔥 (I’m never letting the sleeveless sweatshirt thing go)

- Uh oh NO FUCK I’ve read enough fan fiction to know that this is where Gavin’s fucking trust issues kick in and he decides pushing nines away is safer than getting closer to him SHIT

- AND NINES GETS CONFUSED AND HURT

- AND THEN GAVIN GETS HURT

- I feel angst in this Chili’s tonight

- “I need you to leave” aaaaaaahhhhhhhh here come a whole different kind of tears

- frick dude that ouches

- Insert sad babie noises

- Oml the tension☠️poor Chris and Ada are like😑😑

- Chris could solve this case all by himself change my mind

- Gavin and Nines = (ò///-///ó)

- Chris = :D~oblivious~

- HELL YEAH PARTY TIME

- BEST WIVES TINA AND VALERIE AHHHH

- reed900 who??? I don’t know her. I only know ❤️valerina❤️

- I can’t believe Gavin and Nines invented angst

- I went and got blue gatorade just so I could pretend I was drinking thirium like Nines

- #DetectiveChen2K20

- real sad gavin hours

- Ruh roh Gavin bouta die from the ‘rona virus because rat man smokes hella

- CINEMATOGRAPHY CHEEEEECK HOLY SHIT

- my entire aesthetic in a single shot jfc

- Aaaaahhhh Nines trying to be a supportive bf just makes me ;-; [takes damage]

- HES ACCEPTED GAVIN AS MORE THAN A PARTNER🥺that, my friends, is what we call character development

- We stan the otp aggressively talking about their feelings

- “I’m not going anywhere.” FUCK™️

- SMOKE>FACE

- Aaaaand they’re back at square one. It’s cool it’s fine it’s all good we can work with this.

- Gavin: I don’t need you ò-ó

- Gavin: *immediately after Nines leaves* fuck ó-ò

- “It’s fine”™️

- I love Ada so much hhhhhh she said 🤨

- “Basic Instinct” TINA WITH THE HEAT OMG

- *nervous laugh* haha Ada sis maybe chill a little bit ha ha

- oh no I have a not good feeling

- ADA CHILL ADA CHILL

- WHY IS HE FOLLOWING HER INTO AN ALLEY AFTER THAT SKETCHY TALK

- AAA FUCK FUCK FUCJDJEMNSNDJDNXU FUCK I FUCKING KNEW IT FUCK SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT FUCK

- 😖x1000000

- Oh my god this is so fucking sad Alexa play The Sound of Silence

- Nines got fucked up and Gavin is CONCERNED

- aayyyyy bro Nines full on nakey

- Tina and Gavin sad bro huggin👊😔

- ADA HOW DARE YOU. HOW VERY DARE YOU.

- Uh oh Nines is fckn PISSED

- he MAD mad

- Tina speakin straight facts I love her

- WOOP GAVIN FINALLY ADMITTING HE NEEDS NINES

- f u c k  right in the heart

- I don’t want to attempt writing any notes at this moment because my thoughts are completely incoherent I am a MESS

- “I need you to come back, Nines.” DONT PLAY W ME LIKE THAT

- HAND HOLDING FTW

- Did Gavin really almost bring Nines back through the power of love I am SHAKING

- Dream!Gavin speaking truth as ALWAYS

- These damn flashbacks making me feel some type of way

- OH SHIT HE AWAKE

- that actually low key jump scared me

- God damn these sets are so fucking pro, I’m so happy

- REUNION

- Tina really say “Chris ;) ;) lets go get some ;) coffee ;) ;) ;) ;)”

- CHRIS’ REALIZATION FACE FUCKING LAID ME OUT I HAD TO PAUSE I WAS LAUGJINB SO HARD

- You Undead Asshole™️

- Gavin: ( ⚆ _ ⚆ ) fuck he actually heard me talk about my feelings n shit

- Nines: You literally told me you fucking needed me like five minutes ago

- Gavin: huh weird that doesn’t sound like me I actually hate you

- ooOOHHH  S H I T

- REALLY IS THIS REALLY HAPPENIGN

- woah shit sorry I blacked out for a second what happened

- MY POOR LITTLE FUCKING REED900 HEART IS EXPLODING AND IMPLODING AT THE SAME FUCKING TIME

- CAAAAAAAAN YOU FEEL THE LOVE TONIIIGGHTT

- holy shit I actually gave myself a bloody fucking nose because I smacked my face too hard in excitement

- ❤️💘🧡💞💕💘💓💚💛💘💞💓💛💛💞💘❤️💚💘💜💕💖❤️❤️💕💓💗💘💖💚💝❤️

- FUCK

- “What dipshit programmed you to do that?” 🥺🥺🥺❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️FUCK

- My aunt came in and told me she heard me shouting then asked why I was crying

- HAHA FUCKING CHRIS IS MEEEE

- shit I need to like..,,,,physically recover from that

- whew okay break time is over let’s fucking go

- Nines in the cheeky turtleneck I SEE U

- #DETECTIVECHEN2K20

- Gavin: I’m ready to take this hoe DOWN

- Initiate protocol: SAVE ADA FROM HERSELF

- I could listen to Tina talk to dispatch for hours🥰❤️❤️❤️

- WHITE TRENCH COAT WHITE TRENCH COAT WHITE TRENCH COAT WHITE T

- Gavin being hella concerned boyfriend™️

- FIGHT SCENE™️

- omfg that crowbar really went *CLANG* when it hit Ada’s steel fkn abs what a legend💪😎

- Hell yeah epic Nines gif moment

- no Ada don’t choke Gavin it only makes him stronger

- CHRIS THE MOTHER FUCKIN GOAT😎👏👏👏he really said “fuck ur monologue I’m here to get shit done”

- ADA QUEEN YOURE OKAY SWEETIE

- That character development godt damn

- I might be reaching but Gavin is now wearing a white/off-white shirt/gray that kINDA RESEMBLES DREAM!GAVIN’S SHIRT. Coincidence? I THINK NOT. THATS SYMBOLISM IF I EVER DID SEE IT.

- “buyer’s remorse, huh?”

- “I can’t be everything you need.”

- That awkward moment when you realize the person you were hiding your feelings from has also been hiding their feelings from you.

- “a year of that fuckin’...Ken Doll face smirkin’ at me every day” BE CUTER GAVIN, I DARE YOU.

- naked hand = love

- CHEEKY BASTARDS

- FUCK FUCK FUCK ME

- THAT WAS SO DAMN BEAUTIFUL

- So my review of this film could be summed up by saying that I basically cried for an hour and fifteen minutes.

- Holy damn

[stonerbughead]

Maria watches friday night lights (#21)

Things are really heating up!! This is my post for 4x10 + 4x11~

Tami really is the Mother of Dillon; Tim brings Becky to Tami when he doesn’t know what to do about her pregnancy like damn 😭

Ah Big Mary finally came around to the field?! It’s kinda really endearing that a bunch of the old East Dillon alumni are sitting watching the practice now after how this season started

Ugh I recently watched when Karen thought Lucas got Brooke pregnant and slapped him on one tree hill; this Becky scene with her mom has the same energy. The whole teen moms not wanting their kids to make the same mistake trauma ahhh it’s A Lot

Ohhh no did Vince’s mom relapse?!?! Young Michael B. Jordan at his mom’s bedside is so good damn 😭

Fuck Texas law for forcing this doctor to tell Becky the age of the fetus. She wants the abortion! This doctor would be a true hero if he didn’t follow that law. “Supposed to listen to some right wing doctor?!” Same.

God fucking dammit the state facility waiting lists are too long to take Vince’s mom! The system is set up to fail Black and Brown families.

Eric Taylor’s friendship with Big Mary is so funny to me. “You’re telling me I can’t coach the kid because I’m not black.” Eric, that is certainly not what he said I can’t with you

The Riggins brothers are gonna BURY stripped car frames?!

Ew I hate Ryan. And Eric does too.

DEDDDD

Like I truly cackled through this whole scene omfg

Damnnnn Jess having some madddd feels about Big Mary treating Vince like a son 🥺 poor girl

LMAO Tami way to scare the living shit out of Eric waking him up at 3 am with a sentence that includes a hypothetical Julie pregnancy

“This is the stupidest thing we’ve ever done.” Gotta agree with you on that one, Tim. (Also they’re having a real ass talk while burying these car frames!!!!! Lol)

Awww it was Becky’s first time having sex with Luke? That’s so rough.

“Do you think I’m going to hell if I have an abortion?” “No honey I don’t.” Damn these women are so blessed to have Queen Tami Taylor in their Texas small town!!!

I’m glad Becky is getting the abortion and I’m glad she made sure it was her decision after all that pressure from her mom!!! woof

Ah Big Mary finally showed up to his son’s game and is yelling the same things on the sidelines as Jess?! 🥺

Oh I’m so glad Vince found a way to get his mom in rehab, my heart (do we know how he did it tho? Did the gang help him, given the cash?) ....and got it, oh babe are you indebted now 😭 noooo

OMG Buddy on El Fuego is tooo muchhh I’m dying

Uh oh Luke and these painkillers is creeping back in to become a problem...

HOLY SHIT we get to see Saracen in Chicago???? Oh how I’ve missed him! He looks so cute in a scarf! Awww he has a photo of Julie up in his lil apartment?!

Oh we love Eric listening to his interview about the panthers game while sitting in the car staring at the old field! This show is so gooood like damn

Is Luke’s injury finally catching up to him now that he doesn’t have the painkillers to help him work through the pain?! Man this dude is having a rough semester, he was just dealing with a pregnant sexual partner too!

O H N O I had a feeling Luke’s mom coming in to ask Becky about the abortion was not friendly....and yep now she wants to get Tami fired???? Ugh fuck anti choice conservatives

Saracen’s Chicago apartment is so idyllic wow

Omg can you imagine being Julie getting that call all those months later??? I get why she was so upset, he sounded so casual like BOY YOU GHOSTED

Landry’s mom asking what Jess thinks of Obama, so cringe!

Ew Luke Cafferty’s mom at his door like “don’t forget to say your prayers” as if she isn’t trying to ruin Tami’s life with her anti choice nonsense!!!

Yeeeesh Cheryl’s hitting on Tim?? did Cheryl not notice that Becky is clearly super into Tim 😬 this is so much, why is Tim stuck in a love triangle with a mother and her daughter.

W O W Luke doesn’t even know his mom went to talk to Becky, let alone is trying to get Tami fired...fuck, does Becky even realize what is happening??? She’s gonna be so upset when she realizes Tami is being attacked like this!

Yes go off Tami!!! “I gave her her options and I listened to her. That’s my duty as a principal and a human being.”

“Obama, really?” Lol same Jess

Yeah I’m sure this isn’t gonna get out even tho Tami is keeping her job. Im sure the anti choice nuts will take this loss graciously 🙄

Yes Luke, yell at your mom!! I’m so glad he’s defending Becky and Tami! That was not your grandchild, it was a bunch of cells. Relax.

Tami and Eric’s marriage is so pure. Tells her about her victory and he kisses her. “What are you doing tonight?” “Nothing.” “I’ll go get the wine.” “Okay.”

Oh noooo Luke is literally in Carroll Park asking random ppl for Oxys nooo. Damn this season has covered *so* many social issues so seamlessly! The fuckin opioid epidemic, check.

Also guess that whole cleaning up Carroll Park thing didn’t work Eric Taylor!! which duh

Oh Matt babe I’m excited for you but you should’ve maybe not taken off without telling someone you were dating for years?!

Oh the angst!!! “Matt, we were together for almost four years. I know almost everything about you.” DAMN she is really giving it to him!! ugh warranted even tho let’s be real Saracen looks like he’s thriving in Chicago! they’re better off spending this time apart to ~grow~

Aww tinker is really looking out for Luke! this is pretty heartwarming that they’re defying the coach’s plays just to protect Luke bc of his injury.

....Ugh I knew he’d push it too far, babeeee

“I think I’m moving out.” Yeah Tim probably a good life decision.

Oh fuck now Cheryl is making assumptions and going off??? Bitch he did not sleep with your daughter!!

After watching The Wire for four seasons, this operation Vince is indebted to looks so weak sauce. But yikes nooo his friend got shot!

...anddd here comes the press about the abortion controversy. Saw that coming!

Oooof bad timing to want to stay for another drink, Eric.

Omg poor Vince. his best friend died and his mom’s in rehab??? My heart 🥺

[shockpop]

         being  a  textbook  overthinker  is  a  strong  suit  denki  is  not  particularly  known  for .    a  head  regularly  presumed  empty  has  worked  to  incessantly  churn  the  argument  on  playback  over  the  course  of  three  days ,   violet  staining  crescents  beneath  his  eyes  at  some  point  between  the  late - night  mumbling  and  a  time  wherein  he  doesn’t  even  remember  falling  asleep .     his  oh - so - gracious  host  is  left  at  a  loss  when  she  is  forcibly  tasked  with  shoving  him  awake  each  morning .    

as  much  an  empath  as  mina  prides  herself  in  being ,   it  ain’t  exactly  a  cakewalk  to  get  into  a  neurotic’s  mindset  when  he’s  the  one  insisting  that  he’s  fine ,   that  everything  is  fine    ;    practiced  charisma  a  much - appreciated  plus  in  attempts  to  persuade  his  longtime  best  friend  that  he  just  needed  a  little  breathing  space  from  the  situation .     because  that’s  what  they  have  to  call  it ,   now .    ‘ the  situation ’ .

this  was  all  before  denki  proceeded  to  peel  himself  from  eyesore - chartreuse  cushions  an  hour  late  each  day ,   and  the  reason  why  mina  now  harbors  heavy  concern  beneath  the  initial  irritation  as  she  beats  him  awake  with  a  pillow  for  the  third  day  in  a  row .

astonishingly  enough ,   through  all  the  budding  bruises  and  little  cricks  of  his  bones ,   denki’s  still  not  used  to  it  ----  confused  as  to  why  in  place  of  a  fluffy  orange  butt  sat  directly  on  his  face  is  a  firm  pink  hand ,   squishing  freckled  cheeks  that’d  never  quite  lost  their  baby  fat .  

the  phone  promptly  shoved  in  his  face  (  raw - eyed ,   drool - sticky ,   red  where  strong  fingers  have  imprinted  themselves  into  his  skin  )  reads  7:12  am ,   a  good  hour  and  some  past  his  normal  wakeup  time .    he  shouldn’t  be  so  pikachu - meme  shocked  when  this  scenario  is  the  direct  result  of  a  profuse  refusal  to  take  the  device  off  silent  mode  these  past  few  days  ----  afraid  to  wake  up  to  any  late - night  texts  or  calls .    

and  yet  here  he  is ,   eyes  squeezing  shut  as  he  mutters  his  third ,   grumbly  shit  this  short  week .

       ❛   seriously ,   dude ?   ❜      mina  chides  as  she  flips  through  the  unsung  alarms ,   each  set  five  minutes  apart  from  one  another  beginning  at  5:30  in  the  morning .    

getting  himself  out  of  bed  always  had  been  something  of  a  chore ,   emphasized  by  recent  reasoning  that  he’d  not  been  catching  more  than  half  a  wink  prior  to  that  exact  time  each  day .      ❛   you  teach  people  for  a  living  and  yet  remain  willfully  oblivious  to  the  very  accessible ,   very  convenient  do  not  disturb  function .   ❜      

she  lets  the  phone  fall  unceremoniously  onto  denki’s  lap ,   cushions  creaking  beneath  their  weight .       ❛   get  off  my  couch ,   spud .   ❜

he’d  love  to ,   actually .    every  node  in  his  spine  pops  in  agreement .

the  minutes  between  then  and  hurriedly  collecting  stray  pieces  of  clothing  off  the  floor  pass  in  a  rheumy - eyed  blur ,   other  possessions  that’re  repeatedly  tripped  over  a  courtesy  of  the  emergency  overnight  bag  he’d  emptied  out  over  the  week .    kept  in  the  back  of  his  car  for  situations  that  call  for  it ,   this  doesn’t  really  qualify  as  one  of  those  times .

        ❛   hey .    what’s  the  status  of  you  reevaluating  your  life  choices  so  that  you’re  not  crawling  out  my  door  late  to  work  in  the  same  inside - out  v - neck  you’ve  been  wearing  all  week ?   ❜      mina  prompts  in  midst  of  tossing  on  a  jacket  as  gaudy  in  design  as  the  rest  of  her ,   somehow  completely  comprehending  what  vague  semblance  of  shut  up ,   shut  up ,   shut  up  denki  conveys  through  hand  gestures  in  between  hurriedly  scrubbing  his  teeth .

without  time  to  style  his  hair  this  morning ,   he’s  left  to  ruffle  through  the  unkempt  locks  in  his  reflection  through  the  elevator  doors ,   displeased  in  how  they  refuse  to  obey  any  law  of  gravity  but  deciding  that  he  might  as  well  just  go  ahead  and  look  as  shitty  as  he  feels .    hurts  less  to  acknowledge  it  himself  before  mina  eagerly  relays  just  how  divorced  he  looks  mere  moments  later .

         ❛   you’re  gonna  have  to  talk  to  him  eventually ,   ❜      she  reminds  him  just  before  they  part ,   chaste  kiss  pressed  to  either  cheek  and  equally  reciprocated .      ❛   before  it’s  too  late .    i  know  you’re  both  pretty  keen  on  letting  things  fester ,   but  how  ‘bout  you  just  nut  up  before  your  idiot  boy  pride  makes  things  completely  irreversible ?   ❜   

at  her  humble  suggestion ,   denki  mulls  on  the  air  of  an  amused  hum ,   shouldering  open  one  of  the  glass  doors  for  her  to  walk  through  first .      ❛   my  idiot  boy  pride ,   huh .    s'a  little  misandristic ,   don’tcha  think ?   ❜

she  replies  with  a  wag  of  her  middle  finger  in  the  air  behind  her ,   a  stark  gesture  that  bakugou  would  appreciate  and  that  denki  hates  thinking  that  bakugou  would  appreciate .    he  silently  curses  mina  once  for  the  reminder ,   then  again  for  her  uncanny  talent  of  always  being  right .

on  that  note ,   he  mentally  checks  ‘ idiot  boy  pride ’  as  a  contender  for  the  working  title  of  an  eventual  autobiography .  

           lunch  passes  by  a  lot  more  slowly  in  the  days  he’d  been  forcibly  weened  off  of  bakugou’s  cooking .    left  to  survive  off  what  loose  change  could  nab  from  the  vending  machines  outside  and  random  snacks  found  throughout  the  cabinets  of  the  teachers’  lounge ,   denki  finds  that  whey  milk  and  loose  granola  by  the  fistful  are  not  all  that  amazing  a  combo .   

mina  is  wise  beyond  her  years .    this  is  a  meal  of  a  divor - fuckin’ - cee .

actually ,   the  sudden  absence  of  a  balanced  diet  may  even  be  reaching  the  point  of  a  pressing  health  issue .    when  he  brushes  granola  grains  off  his  shirt  ----  now  worn  correctly ,   after  having  uncomfortably  fumbled  with  it  in  his  car  earlier  ----  he  notices  how  tight  his  chest  has  begun  to  feel  over  the  course  of  the  morning .    an  ache  like  a  scream  that  won’t  come  out .    he’s  bound ,   yes ,   and  dry  granola  has  probably  not  made  the  trip  down  his  esophagus  very  easy    ;    but  had  the  pain  always  been  so  prominent ?

❛   didja  check  twitter  yet ?   refresh  your  timeline  ----  look ,   see ,   it’s  trending !  ❜ 

denki’s  attention  piques ,   turning  towards  the  flood  of  students  rushing  by  the  lounge  door .    on  their  way  back  to  their  classrooms  to  ride  out  the  last  few  periods  of  the  day ,   he’s  not  surprised  to  see  so  many  of  their  eyes  glued  to  their  phones  as  they  walk ,   given  that  lunch  and  homeroom  make  up  the  only  two  slots  of  time  wherein  students  are  allowed  access  to  such  devices .

their  conversations  spill  in  a  slew  of  muddled  topics   :   is  the  villain  big ?    how’d  you  do  on  that  art  history  exam ?    shouldn’t  he  have  backup?    my  sister’s  taking  me  to  that  new  poke  bowl  restaurant  tonight .    is  he  breathing ?    cats  can  doggy  paddle ,   can’t  they ?    blasty’s  a  top - five !   indestructible !    i  hope  i  have  a  team  one  day .    but  so  was  jeanist ,   and  look  what  happened  to  him .

          ❛   bla ----   ❜      denki  starts ,   sparing  a  few  minutes  heading  back  himself  to  fish  his  phone  from  his  cardigan .    he’s  usually  never  without  it ,   idly  recalling  a  time  in  their  youth  where  bakugou  would  have  to  manually  pluck  it  from  his  grasp  so  that  he’d  settle  into  bed  for  the  night .    over  the  past  few  days ,   though ,   he's  been  more  than  content  to  break  character  and  distance  himself  from  the  buzz  of  social  media  under  some  years - too - late  guise  of  self - care  and  breaking  addiction .

waking  his  phone  now ,   the  top  notification  banner  reads  a  single  message  from  his  current  roommate .    

are  you  ok?

below  it ,   an  informal  update  from  twitter ,   alerting  him  of  exactly  what  his  curiosity  demands  to  be  sated  with  right  now .

 trending  in  heroics    :    #BLASTYEXPLODO .

he  doesn’t  need  a  little  shoulder  mina  angel  to  tell  him  that  reading  about  his  ex  is  technically  just  the  time - sensitive  equivalent  of  purposefully  sifting  through  bakugou’s  online  presence   ;    mostly  because  the  app  is  barely  flicked  open  when  the  tightness  across  his  chest  constricts  to  a  sudden ,   sharp  PANG .    

it  doesn’t  take  some  deep  search  to  unearth  the  context  of  his  students’  obsessive  chattering  nearby ,   considering  that  his  entire  timeline  is  being  consistently  updated  with  live  footage  from  the  scene .    a  bird’s - eye  view  of  the  site  below  captures  where  several  heroes  can  be  spotted  as  moving  dots  along  the  destruction  of  the  outskirts    ;    all  save  for  one ,   reported  to  have  been  caught  in  the  fray  after  a  building  collapsed .

fingers  press  deep  into  the  pain  of  his  chest .    his  shoulder  hits  the  wall  to  support  his  weight ,   face  paling  as  he  forces  himself  to  read  the  oncoming  slew  of  tweets  one  by  one .    a  lot  are  unhelpful  ----  mere  wishes  for  blasty  to  hang  in  there ,   some  questioning  where  he  is ,   false  memoriam  by  people  denki  knows  bakugou’s  never  met ,   lots  of  clickbait  for  merch  and  inappropriate  thirst  posts  layered  in  between .    

nothing  gives  him  a  solid  answer .    because  nobody  has  a  solid  answer .

lacking  the  word  association  necessary  to  properly  reply  to  mina’s  text  without  stirring  either  concern  or  cause  for  a  possible  lecture ,   he  shoots  something  quick  to  kirishima  instead .

hey  man ,   thanks  for  everything  lately .    i’ll  feed  the  cats  tonight .    can  you  do  me  a  solid  and  leave  a  key ?

           the  car  ride  home  is  as  long  as  ever  in  traffic  surrounding  the  incident .    every  instance  of  a  top  hero  barely  escaping  the  brink  of  death  is  all  but  a  grim  reminder  that  life  is  short ,   speaking  volumes  to  average  citizens  rushing  home  to  spoil  their  families  before  everything  settles  back  into  a  regular ,   non - life - threatening  routine  for  them  tomorrow .

shortly  after  lunch  (  and  trying  to  shake  off  what  he  was  certain  were  signs  of  a  small  heart  attack  ) ,   denki  decided  that  there  was  no  use  cutting  his  day  short  to  make  an  appearance  at  the  scene .    rapid  updates  from  twitter  and  associates  alike  informed  him  that  blasty  had  eventually  made  it  out  on  two  legs ,   triumphant  as  ever ,   before  being  escorted  to  an  unspecified  hospital  in  order  to  avoid  the  public  eye  in  his  recovery .

denki  takes  his  chances  in  calling  his  mom  between  catching  every  red  light ,   hope  breaking  in  a  small ,   audible  whimper  when  she  doesn’t  answer  his  one - or - nine  calls .    bakugou  wasn’t  the  only  victim  in  today’s  events    ;    he  rationalizes  that  nariko  is  probably  up  to  her  neck  in  new  admissions  regardless ,   but  the  thought  doesn’t  exactly  bring  him  any  peace  of  mind .

breathe .    an  impossible  demand  to  meet ,   but  one  necessary  to  keep  his  electricity  from  snapping  at  the  wheel .

he  doesn’t  exactly  know  why  he’d  even  bothered  showing  up ,   sluggish  steps  treading  the  long  lengths  of  tiled  hallway  leading  to  bakugou’s  residence .    not  really  any  use  hanging  around  an  empty  apartment  all  night    ;   even  despite  the  pressing  matter  of  the  question  mark  tacked  behind  his  current  living  situation .    he’s  not  really  looking  to  task  himself  with  packing  just  yet .

             ❛   it’s  just  something ,   ❜      denki  tiredly  tells  himself  aloud  at  the  foot  of  their  doorstep ,   head  tipped  to  the  ceiling  in  a  brief  moment  of  reprieve .    the  sentiment  resonates  as  somewhat  redundant .    it’s  always  something .    he’s  got  a  million  somethings  in  his  life  that  he’s  never  cared  to  name ,    piling  one  over  the  other  in  the  corner  of  his  mind  without  thought  to  the  mental  repercussions  dealt  to  everyone  involved .    

maybe  there’s  only  one  something  afterall .    maybe  the  common  denominator  was  just  him .

tip  of  his  shoe  peels  back  the  corner  of  the  mat  he’d  insisted  on  laying  there  some  short  while  ago ,    the  key  tucked  beneath  it  shining  in  the  hallway  lighting  once  its  cover  is  disturbed .    bless  his  heart ,   but  kirishima’s  not  very  creative  in  his  hiding  places .

this  copy  is  as  shiny  and  unbroken - in  as  the  one  bakugou  had  given  denki  when  he  first  moved  here ,   spare  a  few  spots  of  dirt  he  brushes  off  before  lodging  it  into  the  keyhole .    

without  a  set  of  miscellaneous  dangling  objects  attached  to  it ,   the  action  of  turning  a  bare  key  into  the  lock  takes  him  back  a  full  year  ago  ----  wherein  he’d  rigidly  haunted  this  exact  spot  on  a  matless  tile ,   uneager  to  begin  a  new  phase  in  his  life  eventually  titled  reversed  strength .

unlike  back  then ,   however ,   the  key  is  met  this  time  around  without  resistance  in  its  lock ,   nothing  to  combat  it  as  it  turns .    the  door  before  him  is  open .     presently .

his  stomach  drops .    

hesitant  to  ease  himself  inside  when  so  actively  adorned  in  hair - raising  suspicion ,   denki  is  met  with  the  usual  stagnancy  of  an  empty  apartment  ----  no  wafts  of  food  cooking  on  the  stove ,   no  sound  of  the  television  on  for  background  noise ,   no  cats  tripping  over  each  other  to  greet  him  with  a  howling  demand  for  kibble  and  petty - pets  (  which  smarts  a  little ,   considering  his  absence  ) .    

there  is  dim  warmth  from  sunlight  pouring  through  the  windows  and  little  else .    not  even  a  speck  of  dust  found  to  sift  through  it .    he  wonders  if  kirishima  had  simply  forgotten  to  lock  the  door  behind  him .

and  yet ,   even  with  this  thought  in  mind  ----  this  silent  prayer  ----  denki  still  holds  a  name  on  his  tongue  as  he  steps  fully  into  the  apartment ,   pocketing  the  key  where  its  triplet  sits  unperturbed  a  few  feet  away .    it’s  a  momentary  struggle  to  find  his  voice ,   and  he  doesn’t  recognize  the  sound  that  comes  out .      

          ❛   k ------- ...   katsuki ?   ❜

@blstys​ .

[crossbows-and-moonshine]

Such a Softer Sin (Chapter twenty eight)

(Chapter one)     (Chapter two)     (Chapter three)     (Chapter four)

(Chapter five)     (Chapter six)     (Chapter seven)     (Chapter eight)

(Chapter nine)     (Chapter ten)     (Chapter eleven)     (Chapter twelve)

(Chapter thirteen)     (Chapter fourteen)     (Chapter fifteen)

(Chapter sixteen)     (Chapter seventeen)     (Chapter eighteen)

(Chapter nineteen)     (Chapter twenty)     (Chapter twenty one)

(Chapter twenty two)      (Chapter twenty three)     (Chapter twenty four)

(Chapter twenty five)     (Chapter twenty six)     (Chapter twenty seven)

Someone from the twins past turns up and Lila is less than impressed at her not so saintly boys behavior.

Sassy Lila is sassy.

Holy fudge nuts, how are we at chapter 28 already? It’s hilarious that I originally wanted to make this about 5 chapters, like seriously Sarah, the fuck? When I first got the idea for Lila and the first chapter, as usual, I had no plan for where it was going, I was aiming for something short and sweet. But I had so much inspiration for this and the boys were having way too much fun.

And I’ve already decided it WILL have a sequel, set during the first movie. I will warn you though, it will be very canon divergent, as is my usual style, and Lila just being with the boys will make things a lot different. I already have things planned out for how I want it to go and there's a big AU element thrown in there that you’ll see, it just needs to happen.

Ramble over lololol

--------------------------------

Thursday, what a boring fucking day it had been. It had felt slow whilst the twins were at work and before long, she was behind the bar wiping it down after some old drunk dude spilled his drink. The boys and Rocco were perched in their usual seats at the bar, right in the middle so she had to pass them no matter which way she went and they could easily hear all of her conversations, not that they'd tell her that. They were laughing and joking with Rocco as Lila went about her business, and Lila looked over as the door opened. A girl came in, she looked so out of place. She had thick rimmed glasses on with a chunky sweater and jeans. Her hair was dark brown and cut into a very short bob. She looked anxious, meek as her eyes looked around and she went to sit at a booth looking so fucking uncomfortable. Lila tilted her head looking at her for a moment before she heard Rocco behind her.

“Oh shit, its Specs!” He laughed loudly, clapping Connor on the back loudly and making both brothers grimace, especially when Lila slowly turned around, leveling her gaze on her best friend.

“Who's that and why are you calling her that fucking offensive name?” Lila asked with a scowl, words dripping with disdain. Rocco blanched a little, eying the brothers warily and they shifted uncomfortably. There was something they weren’t telling her.

They wouldn't meet her eyes and she clenched her jaw, getting annoyed and she squinted at them.

“Who the fuck is she?” She asked harshly. It wasn't that she was jealous or anything, it was the name Rocco had used, there was something off about the way the boys were acting and it was like her sixth sense was tingling that she wouldn't fucking like it. With the boys choosing to ignore her, she settled her eyes on Rocco and he shrunk back. She knew he would crack first, he always did. He had issues with keeping his mouth shut under pressure.

“Rocco you better tell me what the fuck is going on right now, or so help me God.” She scowled, making the three boys look at her like naughty school children.

“Aw fuck...uh...these two kinda fucked her around a bit for a bet.” He winced, knowing how bad it sounded, especially when he was telling a woman this, their girlfriend to be exact. Lilas' eyes widened, turning her glare to the boys and they both lowered their heads, having the decency to look ashamed. They had changed since then, they weren't proud out a lot of shit they had done, especially when drunk and goaded by stupid things like bets.

“You wanna tell me or should I go ask her?” She asked with a quirked brow, her mouth in a tight line. They both looked to her worried and shook their heads, if the girl told her then they would sound like even bigger assholes, mainly because she would tell her the truth from her end of it. The fear crept in and took a vice-like grip of Murphy and he couldn't hold back the words.

“Fuckin’ hell m’girl, we were stupid alright? This one guy who used te come here, he made us a bet that we both couldn’t bed her, so o’ course we took the challenge, we were already piss drunk.” Murphy started, his face heating up a little at having to recount this horrible tale to his girlfriend.

“She's a meek lil thing, a bookworm. She was shy as hell but we… we mighta got her a wee bit drunk and she seemed te like the attention we gave her. So… we brought her back te ours, both had our fun. But Murph, he had her first, turns out she was a fuckin’ virgin, but I fuckin’ swear it on me life Lila, we didn’t fuckin’ force her inte it!” Connor stated firmly, not wanting that thought in her head. She knew they wouldn't have though, despite the fact they were still assholes in this story. She listened intently, her eyes steady as she looked at the pair.

“When she woke the next day, hungover te hell, she was all sweet like, like she thought it meant somethin’ it didn’t mean...and we mighta told her we’d call her, and we never. And then…” Murphy sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, he could practically see the steam coming from Lilas' ears.

“She fuckin’ came back here, tried talkin’ te us, and we were drunk once again. She wasn't gettin’ the hint we weren't interested so… we had some fun with some other lasses, just makin’ out and shit, kinda...rubbin’ it in her face. She saw us, got all upset, cryin’ and all sorts o’ shit before she ran outta here.” Connor finished, swigging his beer like he needed the fucking liquid courage.

Lila wasn't stupid, she knew these men were more boys half the time and she knew they had a very interesting history with women. But to hear how they treated the poor girl, a girl who was clearly not used to having that kind of attention, to have them fucking take her V card off her and act that way, it made her blood boil. Her own first time had been a hot mess and it only dragged that up for her and it was painful. She tugged her lower lip with her teeth and she inhaled deeply, trying to calm down as she glared at them.

“You're paying for her drinks, all night.” She scowled harshly, walking away to pour a shot. They watched with mortified eyes as Lila took the shot and walked over to the girl who was sat there fidgeting in her seat since she had noticed the twins there. Lila noticed her grabbing her bag and she huffed, like fuck she was letting her run from these assholes.

She set the shot down on the table, making the girl jump and look up at her with her wide brown eyes. Lila gave her a small smile.

“Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. Just wanted to welcome you to McGintys, or welcome you back I guess.” She sighed, glancing at the twins who were still watching horrified. They were scared of what the girl might say, they already worried Lila thought of them differently now despite the fact they had truly changed. The girl looked at them, wondering why they looked so scared before looking back at Lila. She gave her a weak smile and nodded. Lila knew it wasn't really her place, but she couldn't keep the words under wraps, she was mad as all hell.

“You’re leaving?” She asked her, looking almost stern and it made the girl look worried.

“Well...I uh...I don't think I’m welcome in here...I should.” She rambled nervously, looking like a scared animal.

“Fuck that! Fuck them!” She yelled, shocking herself at how loud she was as she pointed to her contrite boyfriends who were watching with wide eyes, clearly hearing her.

“You don't have to run away, not again, just because they're here.” She said firmly, making the girl swallow hard and look at her like she was in awe. Lila sat in front of her in the booth and leveled her gaze in the girl.

“What they did, it wasn't right for them to do that, fuck, it isn't right for anyone to do that to you. They fucked you over, but you know what, that's their loss. You're a beautiful young girl and you deserve to be treated like a fucking queen, not with those drunken fucking hooligans.” She stated, glaring over to them. They were both still listening and watching in horror, even Rocco, they were sure she fucking hated them now. Yet they couldn't help but be a little proud of how she was talking to this girl, helping her and building her up.

The girl looked at her almost in wonder of the strong redhead in front of her, giving her a smile. Lila beamed a grin at her, making the girls own smile widen since it was so infectious.

“So, you're staying, as my fucking special guest, you'll sit over at the bar away from those fuck heads. They're paying for your drinks all night too.” Lila smirked at her, making her laugh lightly. It was nice to hear the meek girl laugh and see her more relaxed. The girl couldn't help but wonder who Lila was, how she commanded the whole room, how she seemed to have the boys scared shitless and look actually sorry.

“Are you…?” She asked hesitantly, glancing from the boys to her. The boys half expected her to say no, because she was fucking done with them.

“The unfortunate girl who has to deal with their shit? Yeah, I am.” Lila snorted slightly amused, she was mad at them but she wasn't stupid enough not to notice they had changed. It didn't mean she wasn't going to give them hell for it though. She felt a sort of kinship with the girl since they both had horrible first times, maybe she would tell her about it sometime to make her feel better. The girl nodded, not being able to hide her shock that the girl was clearly in an actual relationship with the boys, and it looked serious by the boys' faces. She felt slightly smug that they were actually worried, almost like she had the upper hand, all thanks to this amazing girl.

“I’m Emily.” She said softly, giving Lila a smile.

“I’m Lila, come on.” Lila grinned, taking her hand and leading her over to the bar. The girl took her shot with her and downed it as she sat down at the end of the bar. Lila went behind the bar, leaning on her hands as she looked at her.

“What would you like to drink Emily, since these fine young assholes are paying? I’d be more than happy to get the champagne out for you.” She smirked wickedly. The boys started to protest, like they had hundreds of dollars to spend on fucking champagne for a girl they fucked over last year, but Lila looked over her shoulder at them, shutting them up instantly as they shrunk back from her like they were being told off by their Ma. The girl had to cover her mouth, to stop herself from laughing at the sight.

“Um… Maybe some red wine?” She sounded so unsure of herself and Lila wasn't sure if it was because she wasn't used to drinking or because the boys were watching her. She knew how humiliating it was and it's why she kept tearing into the boys in front of her, so she knew that what they did wasn't okay and even their own girlfriend thought so.

Lila shot her a grin as she took a step back.

“Our most expensive red wine coming right up, I hear it's really fucking good.” She laughed, moving past the boys who were watching her warily as she grabbed a $50 bottle of red wine. Their faces fell and Rocco snickered, silencing when the twins shot him a look. Lila poured a large glass for her and set the bottle down next to her too. Some of the other patrons at the bar were watching amused. Some of them had even witnessed what had happened with the boys and the meek girl and it was amusing to see them so mortified and Lila putting them in their place. They never thought they'd see the day.

“Enjoy, if you need anything, just holler.” Lila smiled warmly, making the girl smile brightly up at her. Lila walked away to serve some other people and Murphy was fidgeting in his seat.

“Lila, love, can we have another beer...please?” He sounded so hesitant that she fought not to laugh, he sounded like a scolded child, he fucking looked like one too when she stopped in front of him.

“I can piss in a glass if you want and you can have that.” She sassed, quirking her a brow as she gave him a sweet smile.

Rocco's beer he was still nursing came out of his fucking nose at her comment as the bar erupted in laughter. He started choking, laughing and trying to catch his breath as his nostrils burnt like a mother fucker. Connor covered his mouth, stifling his own laughter at hearing such a crazy thing coming out of his pretty girl's mouth. It was so unexpected and sassy, and he knew she'd kill him if he laughed because she was pissed to hell with them. Murphy looked at her with wide eyes, his jaw slack as he tried to fucking fathom those words in his brain. It was something he’d fucking come out with to his own brother, he never expected Lila to say such a thing. His mouth moved yet no words came out as she looked at him, not laughing like every other person in the bar, even Emily had to laugh at what she said. Lila was just squinting at him with a slight smirk.

“I...uh...I mean... if ye wanna piss in a glass then go for it...cannae promise I’ll fuckin’ drink it though.” He retorted almost warily, still in shock and dumbfounded. His comment earned another round of laughter and Connor couldn't even hold it back anymore at his brother's ridiculous comment. Lilas' nostrils flared as she tried not to laugh, biting her lip as she looked at him amused. His shell shocked face was the best thing she’d ever seen. She wished Murphy had his camera so she could take a fucking picture, blow it up and frame it in the loft.

Her face made him relax a little, seeing her amused, he and Connor untensed a little knowing she obviously didn't hate them, but she was mad. They'd probably get a good ear bashing when they got home. She shook her head and snorted a little, going to grab three beers and place them in front of them. Connor reached out, actually fucking reached out to her for once and took her hand. She blinked at him a little as he settled his questioning gaze on her. She sighed, nodding to him to answer his unasked question of if they were okay. He nodded back feeling relieved and let her go so she could go back to working the bar. With the boys slightly more relaxed, they laughed and joked with Rocco again. Emily sat reading at the end of the bar slurping her wine happily, feeling better. The boys wouldn't look at her though, they were far too ashamed to do that. Lila walked over to her when she had a minute, noticing the book in her hands.

“What are you reading?” She asked excitedly. Emily looked shocked that the girl liked to read, seemingly as much as she did. She sat up straighter, a wide grin on her face.

“To Kill A Mockingbird.” She replied, still grinning as she held up the book to Lila so she could see the cover,

“Oh shit! I love that one!” Lila beamed down at her. Emily ducked her head feeling almost shy, she felt like maybe they were becoming friends and she felt awkward all of a sudden.

“It's one of my favorites.” Emily smiled, sipping her wine to help her relax.

“I think you and I are gonna be good friends!” Lila snorted, she could just feel it in her bones, despite how awkward it may be for the boys.

“I’ve never had a friend before.” Emily blurted out, eyes widening at how the wine had loosened her lips a little too much. Lila just gave her a warm smile, not embarrassing her with stupid comments.

“Well, now you do.” Lila smiled. Emily licked her lower lip, glancing to the boys who kept looking over, they were talking amongst themselves but they were still listening in to the girls' conversation.

“Won't that be awkward, won't they be upset or something?” She whispered, like she knew they were listening. Lila laughed loudly and shook her head.

“Fuck those assholes. Well not literally, since you've been there and all and it was a disaster. But I want a friend and I like you, so it's happening whether they like it or not.” Lila snorted at her, making the girl laugh herself. She nodded, sipping some more of her wine.

“Okay, I’d really like that. Sorry if I seem a little...awkward. I’m not used to people. Friends or even like...boys.” She said softly, her cheeks flushing. The wine really wasn't agreeing with her mouth today she noticed. Lila grinned, suddenly getting an idea.

“You know what, I’m gonna talk to Aileen, get the day off tomorrow, and I’m taking you clubbing. It's been years since I've been clubbing with a girl and I have no idea what the scene is like here.” She smirked, making Emily's eyes widen a little. She hadn't been to a club ever and Lila seemed aware of that. The boys frowned, sitting up tense at the thought of Lila, in skimpy ass clothing and dancing with fucking men.

“Will...will they be going?” She asked quietly, nodding to the boys. She didn't ask too quiet though as they heard her.

“O’ course we’re fuckin’ goin’!” They both yelled offended in unison. Lila glanced to them, an amused smirk playing at her lips.

“Alright, calm down wonder twins, you can come.” She snorted, making them both squint at her as Rocco barked a laugh. She looked back to Emily now who shifted uncomfortably.

“Don’t worry, I’ll make them behave, and we're gonna get you loosened up and re-acquainted with the opposite sex...or the same sex...if you're into that.” She grinned wickedly. The boys' eyes widened as they glanced from one girl to the other and Rocco almost fell off his chair. Emily's face flushed bright red and she snorted.

“Oh...I’m not...I’m not into…” She was flustered and Lila fought a grin.

“Hey, no judgement here, I’ve experimented myself, all I'm saying is, don't rule it out.” She smirked as she walked away.

The boys' jaws were on the floor with that news and she laughed at their faces as she stopped in front of them.

“Ye’ve been with another girl?” Murphy asked sounding so in awe of such a thing and she knew he was imagining it in his head. It made her laugh louder. Rocco looked at her like she was a rare unicorn he had just stumbled across drinking from a lake made of rainbows and gold. And Connor, fucking Connor was pinning her with a smirk and an intense gaze and she didn't have to think to know he too was imagining it, wanting fucking details no doubt.

“Yep.” She smirked, offering no more info up.

“Aw c’mon now lass, at least give us somethin’ juicy te think about!” Connor practically whined, sounding offended at her unwillingness to share the information. Emily watched the interaction with a grin as she drank her wine. A wicked smirk spread across Lilas' face as she looked from one boy to another.

“I will...If you all apologise to Emily.” She stated firmly, a grin on her face as she shrugged casually. She glanced to the brown haired girl who looked at her wide-eyed, biting her lip to stop herself from laughing at how the redhead had these boys wrapped around her finger. Rocco barked laugh but stopped abruptly when Lila glared at him.

“You too funny man, don’t think I don't know you're the one who made that bet, it has Rocco written all over it.” She squinted, making him tense and shrink back a little. He had no idea how the fuck she knew that but the looks the brothers shot his way confirmed her line of thought.

“Your choice, I can tell you...in detail...what happened with me and a pretty blonde lass, or you'll have to wonder about it and let it eat you alive.” She smirked at them. The boys all looked to each other, they knew they should fucking apologise anyway since what they did was so shitty, but they had just struggled with their pride to do so. But they wanted to show Lila they had changed, that and they really wanted those fucking details. They went to open their mouths but Lila raised her hand to silence them. They looked up at her like naughty school children.

“Properly, I know you asshats have changed and I’d like you to show my new friend that you're not the same dicks from before and that you're proper gentlemen now.” She said firmly, giving them a pointed look. They couldn't help the pride that swelled in their chest at the fact she had acknowledged they had changed and she called them perfect gentlemen. The twins looked to one another before standing in unison, Rocco following behind. They walked around to where Emily was sat and she gave Lila a shocked look like she didn't know to do with herself, Lila just gave her a reassuring smile.

“We’re really sorry Emily for what we did.” Murphy started, glancing at her through his lashes feeling ashamed of himself.

“Ye didn’t deserve what we did te ye, and we offer our sincerest o’ apologies te ye.” Connor finished, making Lila smile to herself, she loved it when they finished each other's sentences off. The boys took her hands on their own, placing a very brief kiss to it before letting them go.

“Yeah, sorry for bein’ assholes.” Rocco chimed in, awkwardly patting her back, Lila snorted to herself. They looked her apologetically waiting for her to either forgive them or smack them, they weren’t quite sure which way she would go.

The girl was shocked, and she stifled a laugh as she looked to Lila thankfully, to finally get an apology for what they had done. Lila smirked at her and gave her a nod.

“It’s okay.” Emily replied softly, not wanting to offer anything more because despite the fact they had changed, she still felt awkward around them. They nodded gratefully before returning to their seats. They looked up at Lila hopefully and she laughed loudly. An hour later found the four of them in a booth, Lila facing all three boys, she had asked Emily if she wanted to join them but she had politely declined, she’d had enough of the MacManus twins for the night. Lila sat leaning back with her arms folded over her chest, smirking slightly at the boys' faces. She had just told them the story of a blonde girl named Cassie she met in New York in a club. Lila was drunk, she wanted to experiment, and experiment she fucking did. The night ended with her at Cassie's getting eaten out by the pretty girl and returning the favour. The boys' jaws were on the floor, eyes wide as they looked at her in shock. Their eyes glazed over a little like they were in a faraway place, New York no doubt, two years prior to this date where they were a fly on the wall for the whole encounter. Lila was more than amused at the whole situation.

“So...are ye...bisexual then?” Murphy asked curiously after what felt like forever of silence. Lila snorted a little as each of them leant forward on the table, acting so fucking interested in the answer, even Rocco.

“I mean...I guess? I can look at a girl and know she's attractive. That's the only time I’ve been with a girl though and honestly, I much prefer the male anatomy.” She gave them a wicked smirk, eyeing up the brothers in a way that made their jeans tighten a little. Out the corner of her eye, she noticed Emily getting ready to leave and she sighed, looking back to the brothers with amusement gone from her face.

“I don't want her walking home alone this late, especially since she's had a drink.” She stated seriously with a furrowed brow. The boys glanced to the other girl, understanding why Lila was worried.

“I’ll walk her home.” Rocco offered, making Lila and the boys look to him a little shocked.

“Are you sure you wanna walk ‘Specs’ home Roc?” Lila asked with a pointed glare, letting them all know she hadn't fucking forgotten about it all. Rocco's face fell and he looked ashamed of himself once again.

“Fuck Lila...I’m sorry...You know how I am...I’m an asshole.” He sighed. Lila frowned a little, standing and leaning over, taking the lovable cave mans face in her hands. The twins quirked a brow as they watched on carefully, it was a little to close for their liking.

“You're not an asshole Roc, you're one of the best men I know. You have a heart of gold in there.” She smiled, making him blush slightly and duck his head. She gave him a quick kiss to the forehead and moved to sit back down. The twins smirked to themselves as they looked at how quiet their hairy friend had gotten. It warmed their hearts hearing Lilas affectionate words to their best friend, they knew she was right.

“But… if I find out you were an ass to her, I'll gut you like fish and hang you with your own insides.” Her sweet innocent smile contradicted her words and Rocco's eyes widened so much the twins thought they might fall out of his head. They both snorted, sipping their beers. Their girl could be downright scary when she wanted to be.

Lila stood, walking over to Emily, the girl smiled at her and squeaked when Lila suddenly pulled her in for a hug. When she moved away they smiled at each other.

“Rocco's gonna walk you home so you get there safe. He’ll let me know your address and I’ll come by tomorrow? At like 6? We can get ready together.” Lila smiled at her, not wanting her to back out. Emily nodded with a smile, grateful too that she wouldn't be walking home alone and that Lila cared enough to arrange a chaperone.

“Alright, thanks Lila.” She smiled warmly. Lila squeezed her hand before getting back to the boys. It was time to close anyway. She watched as Rocco and Emily left and then looked to her two handsome devils.

“Alright then, are we ready to head home?” Lila grinned. They smiled at her, standing up and both kissing her cheeks.

“Aye.” They smiled in unison.

Taglist; @risingphoenix761 @arlaina28 @daryldixonandfrogs

[theskyexists]

Fleabag

ok that sweater pull is just

that got me 

the way that was set up

i can't really stop laughing

but what comes after is just aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa too knife edge for me really

my favourite relationship is already the one with her sister

fleabag wow she is a disaster. i always used to think - at least im not dysfunctional in that way. then i used to think, yeah but there's big advantages to it because you can lash shit out and away from you and idk fake it until you make it - coping for independence babey. but now im like nope. being that ragged and defensive and incapable of yielding at the right time or fix things sucks.

this rabbit teeth man apparently can hold a conversation all on his own.

this is fascinating because this woman i so extremely different from me it's insane. she just - what a dick oh my god hahahaha. she feels like she fucked up at being closer with her sister, hangs out with some dude she doesn't really like, has a horrible time, steals money, feels guilty over rejecting him and stealing from him, so tries to blame him and project on him for being a dick and get it all over with fakely. not to say that he isn't a dick. financial insecurity is a TRIP of mental bandwidth going narrower and narrower i imagine. (edit: oh and yeah grief)

no good deed goes unpunished lol

woah she can't be vulnerable with anyone? oh she did it. but then her dad is an idiot who deflects her one attempt with humour. wow this dude. well she instantly does payback. omg it's olivia colman. this dialogue is searing. it's not even that they were sleeping, it's just that they dont fuckin want her there. 'look after yourself' - yeah the point is that she came here for somebody to look after HER.

this is fucking DRAMA

makes perfect sense to me that she'd steal that statue though. by that time it's like why the fuck not nobody fuckin cares about me anyway im beholden to no one hey

so the one person she had a good relationship with ACCIDENTALLY killed herself. yikes. YIKES

im liking the bi vibes

damn all the men in this series are.........awful. lol

she really lives on the edge doesn't she. why seek out a confrontation with olivia colman that just seems like punching above your weight.

every single of her romantic options are SHIT. except possibly the girl in the sex shop but i guess that one's not real.

what the fuck.

allllll the men in this series are awful??? so far. fuckin FUCK!!!

so what im getting from this is that the whole series spins on the thwarted potential for fleabag to connect with her sister be vulnerable, and gain a smithereen of acknowledgement?

WHY.

god woman love yourself and kick the guy in the nuts again verbally like he deserves. like, make him fuck off oh my god. stop playing nice!!!!!

though i am kind of liking how this show has so many sex scenes but they're played pretty realistically but none of em make me feel disgusted. guess it's cos of the subjectivity that goes into it.

she pet the guinea pig! first step in recovery??

god i love her and claire's relationship but like. they're both totally not okay lol.

but they do seem to be the only ones who consistently get the truth out of each other

well wow this series does go There.

why is it that everytime she makes claire laugh she cries?? what is going on??? ah god i LOVE THESE TWO

why is every single fuckin man in this show pretty much awful (except possibly i suppose the man trying genuinely to be better at better man camp)

at end of the season: can't believe he was the one good man in this goddamn show. 

---- intermission ----

im just so fucking angry about this last episode of fleabag

so goddamn fucking furious

by how every single fucking person in her life abandons and betrays her!!!

but most of all her goddamn fucking DAD - he KNOWS that he wronged them for  fucking hooking up with their GODMOTHER, he KNOWS that his fucking wife is a monster to them - he’s right THERE when she says these horrible things to her, he SEES her SLAP HER, and he won’t fucking support her in ANY way - not emotionally, not financially (when he should know and DOES know that that cafe is all she has left of her friend), and then he has the AUDACITY to blame HER!!! HER!!!! for ‘fucking him up’??!??!!

when he basically JUST told her to FUCK OFF out of his life?? and then she’s nice to him??? she apologises to him??? he deserves to get punched out! he deserves to get screamed at

her sister betrays her and blames her for her best friend’s death?? leaves her humiliated and completely alone in the world when she’s just looking out for her?

AFTER she’s lost her best friend in the world with intense guilt issues?

she cannot rely on anyone - ANYONE. she’s right about that - and that’s the most devastating thing. but i feel like she needs to scream at them - stop pushing it down, stop keeping up appearances, stop stop stop.

show your pain.

makes me think her childhood was also one where she could never count on support, or a listening ear, or trust, or belief, after their mother died.

i can barely continue. this is the LAST episode. she’s clearly valued by fucking no one. are they trying to recreate - like, show how Boo felt? that maybe if you hurt yourself, then they may finally fucking CARE?

wow i was right.

well i suppose he did save her life

and…this total stranger….did more for her than any of the people that were supposed to care for her.

-------end

anyway. when love is scarce, you take anything you get. that's fleabag.

i wish she could cut out every motherfucker that betrayed her in that last episode. i know her sister is going to be a big character next season - but i will find it enormously hard to forgive her. BECAUSE she was the one person who cared for her, supported her, was real with her, appreciated her - and the other way round. that betrayal is worse than anything (apart from the dad's betrayal - he deserves to burn in hell, not get apologised to)  im sure fleabag will just let it go. like she seems to let everything go - every single goddamn insult and humiliation and hurt that other people put her through.

she never addresses any of it outright - never. never does she call people out. she internalises everything. she internalises even! 'i fucked up my family' NO YOU FUCKING DIDN'T

she cleans up the things she shattered? the most frustrating thing. they hurt her but she never dares to hurt them back - not really. she doesn't even dare show her pain or anger.

but the end is life-affirming af. and phoebe waller bridge did that very right.

[macdentrash]

what do you think will happen with macdennis this season?👀

WARNING: I went off on this I’m sorry, I’m just a passionate macdennis stan trying to make a living in this cold cold world

I honestly don’t know and it’s got me all stressed lmao but I can give u my absolute best hot take👀*warning I’m about to go off* so let’s start at the beginning of s13 to look at the dynamic™… so we’ve obviously got Mac sad with Dennis gone, Dennis left a number for a mental health clinic and Mac’s gotten as he says “super ripped” which probably has something to do with his body issues (esp in relation to Dennis and his masculinity). Anyways we obviously have MAC getting a fucking sex doll of Dennis and when Dee asks him if it’s Dennis he’s just like “Yeah? Of course” like who else would it be? But even MORE interesting is the fact that Cindy tells Mac she wanted him to start dating to fill the void losing Dennis left in his life… like at this point it’s just obvious that Mac is DEEPLY in love with Dennis and that just keeps us wondering if Dennis reciprocates. In the strip club scene during ep 1, Mac just seems mad at Dennis (”Dennis is a bastard man!”) and encourages the gang to try to move on (this is important to my theory so hold onto that my dudes) which means that Mac has the potential to get over Dennis eventually if he gets to that point of frustration... but either way when Dennis comes back Mac is still all like :’) all smiley and happy, and Dennis is looking at Mac like That™ and immediately makes a comment on Mac’s appearance. So after the first episode it’s still like... what’s the fuckin VIBE RCG hmm? Because I didn’t know what was gonna happen after that first episode but hopeful because even those few seconds they were interacting were so...gay... like wtf and then they come for MY SCALP in MY HOUSE by BLASTING the BOYS ARE  BACK IN TOWN? 

Lmao...anyways after the fucking chaotic nut bust that was s13 ep1 I was really keeping an eye on episode 2 for the Macdennis vibe of the season because ya girl did NOT know what to expect. And what do they do? HMM? They let Megan Ganz clear my skin and feed my crops by giving us the fuckin Sherlock based Macdennis au we never really asked for but desperately needed (mostly because of the fuckin pipes they have later cuz that shit is so funny to me)... anyways episode two was gay, we know this. Like? They kept looking at each other like That, the fuckin HEART LOCK (there was absolutely no reason that it needed to be heart shaped, RCG explain), fuckin “let’s keep this between us”, “the game is afoot”. Woo hoo anyways, they were just acting like they used to and it was nice okay? Also the Denny’s t-shirt and Dennis looking at Mac all love sick at the end when they go see Dee... 

So after episode 2 I’m like okay GAY, it’s gay folks! That’s the vibe! And I was so ready for Time’s Up because at that point all we’d really seen was Dennis with the UGLY up on the projector and them sitting next to each other like That. So originally I thot that it was just gonna be like a low-key Macdennis ep and I so ready for that and just seeing the gang all together... and then Megan Ganz came for us all and TIMES UPPED the gang and we were all so shook. Megan Ganz giveth and Megan Ganz taketh away as they say. I know this episode is NOT about shipping but this post is and so I’m gonna analyze, don’t come for me. So Dennis obviously told Mac to “stop kissing him” (which is different from saying “stop TRYING to kiss me” but anyway) and that it “was never gonna happen”. Mac looked hurt but seemed to be ok, he still called Dennis out on that fucking picture (”what year was that taken?!”) and was still joking around at the end. So i was obviously fuckin SHOOK by this whole thing and was really excited to see what happened in New Wheels because I felt like their dynamic could go in any direction @ that point.

Wow this is long but I’m already this far so :) let’s keep it rollin (get it? like WHEELS? I’m here all week folks). So at the beginning of New Wheels Dennis is obviously trying to get the gang to talk to him about going to ND and nobody really seems interested. What I thought was interesting was the camera angle, for the majority of the time Dennis is talking the camera only shows Mac and Dennis in the frame, it almost looks like they could be alone? Which is not a mistake, there has to be some reason they edited it that way. But more importantly Dennis is saying like “I appreciate you respecting my privacy by dancing around the subject” etc and he keeps looking at Mac. Also when Dennis says “you guys want to ask about my family” Mac’s just like “I don’t” which is what Dennis deserves tbh. Anyways Mac kind of seems to be keeping his distance from Dennis in this episode which is interesting after the events of Times Up, maybe Mac’s just listening to what Dennis wants, he’s backing off maybe? I don’t know but when they’re in the car dealership Mac and Charlie leave in the middle of a conversation with Dennis to go look for bikes and Dennis looks a little confused (again it’s what he deserves). Later, when Charlie asks Mac why he doesn’t do better, as in find someone to date, Mac just says “it’s hard out there”. I want to focus on this because um? Mac’s fuckin built and looks like a fuckin walking ray of sunshine so I don’t think it’d be that difficult for him to find someone, just saying. Is it hard out there for him because he’s in love with Dennis? Yeah, probably. Mmmm moving on, Mac and Dennis aren’t together again until the end of the episode and Dennis is all happy and singing Rick Astley, he still gave make a Look through the mirror and all seemed to end well.

WOW so based on all this evidence I’ve brought to you in this Paddy’s Pub tonight, this folks is my theory:

Mac and Dennis will be ok and probably acting like good friends™ in The Gang solves the bathroom problem. Probably no major developments but most likely some pure macdennis content. I think things will get more intense in the Superbowl episode. And I know what you’re going to say: “But Kaitlin... it’s a flash back episode so Dennis probably won’t be in it” and to that I reply that with Charlie gone they will be down to 3 members of the gang so I feel like Dennis is going to pop up at some point. He probably won’t be there in the beginning but maybe half way through? Idk. I love the idea that Mac and Dennis get caught on the kiss cam and they just do it cuz fuck it but Dennis is way too into it for it to just be like a “haha i kissed my gay friend on tv lol” kind of moment so he freaks out (which could go back to Times up and Dennis saying “stop kissing me” etc). 

Now! For Mac Finds His Pride I have some BIG IDEAS folks. So Frank is going to try to get Mac a man and Mac might be hesitant at first but warm up to the idea. How I picture it going down in my mind’s eye (yes, my 3rd eye is open) is: Mac is at the bar flirting with a good looking guy and they’re talking/laughing, standing really close and leaning in to each other (sound familiar?). Dennis is having fun at the party they’re having in the bar for pride (boys are out tonight huh?) until he turns around and freezes when he sees Mac and this dude. His face just goes stone cold and he is the embodiment of a jealous gay (think of the gang misses the boat and all of his mascara Dennis glory). The guy leans closer in to Mac and looks like he might kiss him, now Dennis can’t let that happen can he? So he goes over to the bar and just goes “hey Mac!”, Mac spins around and Dennis does some gay shit right then and there either kissing him (I think I would have a heart attack if that actually happened though) or giving him some “I HAVE BIG FEELINGS” type speech. Either way BOOM Macdennis is canon. This is how they leave it for the season and we’re all forever shook to the core.

Now, I know that it becoming canon wouldn’t fix their toxicity and problems but that’s for season 14 me to analyze (we’ll hope anyways!).

*DISCLAIMER: if you got this far, I love you and we can all get through this trying time together*

[maxhoemo]

hey can u do an ask with max and ian where max has a mean ex and they run into him and ian comforts him? max isn’t like baby, he’s like normal swearin max but when he sees his ex it takes a toll on him so ian has to help with snuggles 💕 totally understand if youre not comfortable with the ask

“Look at these!” Ian laughed, pulling out a ridiculous looking pair of jeans from the rack. Wide legged, men’s jeans with a huge be-dazzled cross on the ass.

Max laughed. “I bet some fucking dumb cunt would walk around in those thinkin’ he’s cool.” They were out shopping at the mall, just for fun. It was coming up to there one year anniversary as a couple, and Max wanted to do something special for it. He just couldn’t think of anything yet.

He was so grateful to have Ian in his life, he just had to show it in some way. Ian was really the best boyfriend anyone could ask for. He was funny, easy to talk to, compassionate, kind and a host of other things Max couldn’t even begin to name.

They stopped by the food court for lunch. It may seem lame, but this mall’s food court was one of their favourite places to go for lunch. It just had a good atmosphere. Max’s smile soon faded though.

“Oh my God, Max!?” A light brown haired woman smiled, greeting the couple. “I haven’t seen you in so long!”

“Oh… Hey…”

“Who’s this?” Ian asked.

“Oh, hi,” She shook Ian’s hand with a warm smile. “I’m Ronnie. Max and I used to date.”

“Oh, hey.” Ian greeted her politely. It probably wouldn’t be nice to bring up the fact that Max had never mentioned her before.

“It’s so nice to see you again! We really should have kept in touch. It’s too bad…”

“Yeah. It is too bad…” Max agreed. Though, he wasn’t really on the same page. He just wanted her to leave them alone and starting an argument probably wasn’t the best way to make that happen. She soon did, but it didn’t really make anything much better.

Max felt nauseous all of the sudden. Like a nervous sting in the pit of his stomach, really. “Ian… I don’t wanna eat…”

“Huh? Why not?”

“I just wanna go home…”

“But we were having such a good time, and…”

“I know. I’m sorry. But, please, can we just go home?”

“If that’s really what you want, then… Yeah. Of course.”

“I just don’t feel good.”

—-

“Hey, Ian. How’s it going?” Max asked, standing in the door-way of the living room as Ian worked on the computer. He was ready for bed, wearing only a long T-shirt and socks.

“Pretty good…” he nodded. “I’ve just about gotta be done here.”

“Look, umm…” Max came further into the room, sitting down on the couch near Ian. “I’m sorry about earlier. I guess I kinda ruined our day out or whatever.”

“Oh, no. Max, it’s fine. Why did you suddenly feel so sick though? Are you feeling better?”

“Eh, not really. But like, it’s more of an emotional sickness. Does that even make any sense?” he laughed slightly.

“No, I think I get what you mean…”

“It was because of that cunt we ran into.”

“Oh. So, I’m guessing there’s a reason you never told me about her?”

“Uh, yeah,” Max nodded. “I fucking hate her.”

“Why? Did she like, cheat on you or…?”

“No. Well, maybe I don’t know. She was like, I don’t know… Abusive.”

“Oh…” Ian’s expression fell. He gave Max an empathetic look. “Did she hurt you?”

Max just nodded. “Yeah, dude. She was nuts. She fuckin’ threw shit at me all the time. Like, one time she threw a plate at me and it broke against the wall. Fucking scary shit.”

“Fuck…. That’s…”

“Really shitty?”

Ian laughed a little. “Yeah. I’m really sorry you had to go through that.”

“Well, I mean, that’s not even half of it.”

“You can tell me. I mean, if it would make you feel better.”

Max looked at Ian, thinking about for a moment. After a few seconds he decided Ian was right. It would make him feel better. He gestured to the couch, for Ian to sit beside him. He did, wrapping an arm around Max, who in turn rested his head against Ian’s chest.

“I love you, Max.”

Max laughed. “I know that! I love you too.” He took another moment, just sitting with Ian before he began to open up. “At first… Everything seemed… Great. But, she always had anger issues. I mean, I do too. You know how I get when something doesn’t go my way.”

Ian nodded. “Yeah. Like yesterday at the park when you cursed out that wasp that landed on your fries.”

“Yeah. Exactly. But I mean, she… She took everything out on me. Everything was always my fault. And she got violent, eventually. But you know, she always apologized and for some reason I believed her. I’m such a fucking idiot.”

“No, Max. Don’t say that… She manipulated you. It isn’t your fault.”

“Yeah… But I just…”

“No. Stop. Don’t say that.”

“Okay,” he agreed. “Anyways, I just… Couldn’t fucking take it anymore. I was on edge, and miserable all the time. I finally realized how she was ruining my life. I was fucking terrified to break up with her. I didn’t know what she would do.”

“How’d you do it?”

“I uhh, packed all my shit and made Chad take me to his place one day while she was working. Just sent a text. I know that’s kinda a dick move but…”

“No. I understand why. I mean if you did it in person…”

“Exactly. Look. I don’t wanna talk about this anymore.”

“That’s okay. You don’t have to.”

“I feel a little better. But, it’s all too much at once I guess.”

“I’m always here if you need me to listen,” Ian assured, giving Max a kiss on the head. “I’ll never let anyone hurt you again.”

“I know Ian. I love you so much.”

“It’s good you didn’t tell me before, cause if I knew how bad she hurt you I’d have knocked her teeth out.”

Max laughed. “I would love to see that.”

“I’ll do it for you then.”

“Ian! You’ll be arrested!”

“I’d still do it for you.”

“Shut up!” Max laughed. He bent his neck up and kissed Ian on the lips a couple of times. “Just tell me you love me a few more times.”

“How many?”

“Umm… I don’t know.. Five?”

“I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you,” Ian answered, ending each sentence with another kiss.

“I’m so glad you’re here for me…”

“Me too. I’ll protect you from all the crazy cunts and assholes of the world.”

“And I’ll do the same for you.”

[mirrorsofparanoia]

“Do It Yourself”-  Final Fantasy meets Perler Beads.

Before you whip out your credit card and order tons of materials from your favourite shop, you need to know what exactly you want to make. For that it’s usually enough to open google and search for “Final Fantasy perler beads”. It will give you a selection of patterns awesome people (who are not me) put online. Pinterest is probably gonna be your webpage of choice in the long run (despite being complete ass to navigate), but for starters I’d recommend the main page of FF: Record Keeper game: https://ffrkstrategy.gamematome.jp/game/951/wiki/Home . It has pictures of 2D sprites of literally every main character out there and even includes alternative outfits like Advent Children Cloud and Tifa or Diva Celes. Once you set your mind on a pattern or two… or a dozen, you are ready for the next step: getting the materials.

The plates for perler beads come in all shapes and sizes, but I’d suggest using the normal standard size square shaped ones. They have small handy hooks that allow you to connect them with each other for bigger pictures.They also have the perfect size to fit exactly one 2D sprite /thumbsup. Amazon is probably gonna be your best friend here.

For beginners I’d recommend buying either one or two of them. As long as you don’t know if this is actually something you’d like to keep doing, getting more than two is most likely a waste of your money. With two you’ll have more than enough space for the basic patterns… don’t give me that look. “Basic patterns” doesn’t mean bad or boring. Most adorable ones that I have are the easiest ones to make. You wanna start small, but not be afraid of dreaming big.   

Yes, I’m bragging. No, you don’t need this many. Again, you can comfortably order them from amazon or other online shops. For beginners I’d probably recommend one of those compiled kits you see on the picture. They are not expensive and have the most important colours covered. There are several different ones too, so you can just go ahead and pick the one most suited for the pattern(s) you want to make.

And then there’s this shit:

They are also rather cheap and include most important colours, but trust me, by the time you’re done sorting this crap out, you’re gonna wanna murder whoever came up with this stroke-inducing equivalent of waterboarding with a blunt box cutter. Or so I heard.

Anyway… There is one thing you might wanna pay attention to. Obviously there are several different brands of beads, all of which cover different colors or color hues. Hama for example doesn’t have the really dark grey beads, while it’s fuckin impossible to find frost blue made by Perler (in my experience). So if you decide to make bigger pictures, you’ll sooner or later have to mix them. It is not that much of an issue, but I figured I might as well mention it. Although all of the brands (I use Hama, Perler and Nabbi) have roughly the same size, they do have different melting points. This is gonna become important once you are done with your picture.

Once you got everything needed, feel free to start working on your pic. To make putting beads in place easier, you can use small pincers or something similar to that. The little fuckers can be a real pain to handle, especially if you made a mistake and have to relocate a row or two.

I usually start with the feet or at the lowest part and work my way up towards the top, but it’s just a personal preference.

For the next step you’ll require one functional iron. It doesn’t really matter what kind of iron you take, there’s no secret or trick to this part. Just make sure that it’s not too hot. At the beginning it’s probably a good idea to keep it on low heat and slowly raise it, when you start getting more comfortable with it. The goal is to melt the pearls so they stick together. This is where you’re gonna notice the difference between the brands, if you decided to mix them. Hama melt fastest and Perler take for fuckin ever to melt, so you gotta be carefull and make sure that you don’t overmelt some parts of your picture.

From here it’s a matter of opinion: some people iron both sides of the finished picture, to make sure that it doesn’t fall apart like… ever. I prefer ironing only one side, because melted pearls don’t look very good. But in that case you have to keep in mind that your finished product is gonna be mirrored (says the dumbass, who made a very cute looking bottle of “kliM” a while ago).

To prevent them from sticking to the iron, you’ll need backing paper. No big secret here either, any brand will do. You can take either several layers (max 3 or the pearls won’t melt for shit) or only one, depending on how comfortable you are with the iron. I usually take only one layer, because it also makes it easier to see what the fuck you’re doing and how well the pearls have melted. Try to not move the paper during the process, because the pearls stick to it and there’s a chance that you’ll ruin your pic.

Once you are done, grab any heavy ass book (or several) of your choice and put it on top of your finished picture without removing the baking paper. Since real world physics are assholes more often than not, the pearls will start shrinking and tighten up, as they cool down. That can lead to your work to bulge or get dents. The heavy ass book is here to prevent that from happening.  Encyclopaedia Eorzea serves that purpose really well:

I usually leave it to cool down for about 15-20 mins.

So yeah, that’s the whole trick. You can do basically anything you want, be it chocobos or FFXIV “Palace of the Dead” job sprites. It’s quick, easy and makes for amazing nerdy birthday and xmas gifts. Trust me, people go nuts over these. Or if you are a greedy whore (like me) and decide to keep them, you can glue a magnet to their backside and stick it to your fridge for example.

Now, let’s assume you saw this post and went like “Holy cow! Dude, this stuff is amazing! I wanna make the coolest shit with it! But how do you get patterns for that very specific artwork I want? There are none on the int0rwebz!”

Despair not, fam, I gotcha covered.

This nifty little page is the best “the-pic-I-want-to-perler” - converter you’ll find: https://www.hikingdave.com/perlerDesign.htm

Since bards are awesome and badass, let’s take this picture of a FFXIV bard artwork as an example:

As you can see the page allows you to decide what size your finished picture is going to be. So let’s give it a shot and say that we have a 5x5 field to work with. The page then will automatically simplify the image to fit the 5x5 field scale.

The actual picture you get to download is way bigger than the one below. Every tile and colour on it also has its own number, making it easier to recognize which pearl to put where:

Additionally it will also show you the exact colour and amount of the pearls you are gonna need to finish this beast.

You can do this with basically any picture. As you can see in the list of beads, the program also puts the white background into the calculation (12k pieces). Feel free to ignore it.

That’s all the magic.

What I really like about this is that you don’t have to be natural Picasso or practice your ass off to make something that looks really cool. The stuff is really cheap and easy to make and all you need for that are fingers that are preferably not all thumbs, an iron spine (it’s prob still gonna hurt a lot…) and a bit of patience.   

[hood-ex]

This is a fic written for @stxleslyds! The prompt was: a fic with Dick, Roy and Lian spending time together in the Outsiders era. Thanks for the donation, Tati 💙.

Important: This fic takes place a week after the events of Outsiders (2003) #19.

“We could use you here,” Roy says. Even with his voice coming directly through the comm, Dick almost doesn’t hear him say, “I need you here.”

A soft wind blows through Blüdhaven, ruffling through Dick’s sweat-matted hair. What a filthy night it is for a Friday. Thunder rumbling in the distance with hot, humid air filling Dick’s lungs. It’s the kind of air that isn’t natural for a place like the ‘Haven. It’s here for whatever reason, and it’s no better now that the sun has been replaced by pink and purple neon lights flashing across the strip. It’s nights like these that Dick can admit to missing his red tunic and green shorts. It was shit to wear them in the winter but an absolute godsend in the summer.

Dick sighs deeply, moving away from the ledge of the building and away from his view of the herds of drunk people whose laughter echoes between the bars and casinos. There’s a tall HVAC unit in the middle of the building that he walks over to and sits against. The fabric of his suit rubs against it, and he squirms a little at the uncomfortable position. He bears it because this is a conversation that requires a little support.

“Dick.”

“I know,” Dick mutters.

He should be under the streets of Brooklyn the same as all the other Outsiders should be. Considering the circumstances, it’s no surprise that some of them have deserted the ship for the time being. Licking their wounds in private so to speak. Dick’s not proud of it. He tacks it onto his mental bulletin board of shame where it sits up there all torn and ugly like the rest of his deplorable moments.

“I’d feel better if you were here to watch Lian when I step out of the room,” Roy says in Japanese. Dick’s brow furrows. Either Lian is in the same room as Roy and he doesn’t want her to know they’re talking about her or there’s an Outsider nearby that he doesn’t want listening in on his personal issues. “She hasn’t started therapy yet and her separation anxiety is still high.”

“High for both of you,” Dick points out. He thinks back to a few days ago when Roy had called him in a panic because he’d left all of his groceries in the middle of the store after his paranoia got the best of him and had him running back to the base to check on Lian.

“Tell me about it,” Roy laughs dryly. “I feel like I’m going fuckin’ nuts, dude.” The strain in his voice sends a full body shiver down Dick’s spine. “All I can think about is whether she’s okay and if the base is protected enough, and if I can really trust everyone here. You and Kory are the only ones I feel okay leaving her with.”

You shouldn’t trust me like that, Dick thinks bitterly. Lilith and Donna trusted me with their lives and look where they are now.

“Everyone else is… I trust them as teammates. I trust them with my life. But I can’t—"

“Trust them with Lian’s,” Dick says, knowing how much this whole situation has fucked with Roy's ability to trust anyone and everyone. Except him and Kory, apparently. Probably Ollie and the rest of Roy's family too.

He thunks his head against the HVAC unit and stares up at the dark sky. Not a single star up there, he thinks, and something like guilt burns in his chest. You took them all with you, didn’t you, Donna? Put them in your pockets and faded away. “She might not be comfortable with me there,” he says after a moment.

It pains him to think that Lian could be scared of him. Scared of him because he looks similar to one of the blue-eyed, dark-haired kidnappers who murdered her babysitter and then branded her like cattle. That type of trauma association doesn’t go away after a week.

“Kory told Lian you might stop by, and you know what Lian asked her?”

Terrible things flash through Dick’s head. Things like words born of fear or disgust. He hugs his arms around his knees and squeezes them tight.

“No, what did she say?”

“She asked, ‘Is Uncle Nightwing gonna bring Blue’s Clues with him?’”

A smile tugs at the corner of Dick’s lips and his eyes start to sting. He can’t believe that’s the first thing she thought of. It only seems like yesterday that he was watching Blue’s Clues with her in Titans Tower. Sometimes he would pause the show and ask Lian questions about each of the clues just to hear what kind of outlandish answers her kid brain could come up with. Other times the detective in him couldn’t help but steer her towards a logical answer. Roy used to always roll his eyes and tell him to stop trying to turn her into a mini Nightwing.

“That doesn’t mean she’ll be okay seeing me in person and you know it,” Dick reminds him.

Roy’s sigh is soft and muffled in his ear. “We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.”

Dick’s not one to wait around.

“Let’s cross it now.”

“You’re coming over?” Roy asks, and even though he mostly sounds neutral, Dick can hear the disbelief hidden under it all.

If there was an award for the world's most shitty friend, Dick would probably be in the lead to receive it. Here Roy is dealing with the fact that his daughter was abducted and almost trafficked, and what’s Dick been doing for the last few days instead of sticking by his side? Working himself to the bone in Blüdhaven, that’s what. Hiding away from the fact that he almost lost another important person to him. Trying to avoid the crushing weight of failure that clings to him like a second skin.

Pathetic. Some safety net he is.

“Yeah, give me an hour,” Dick says.

The commute from Blüdhaven to Brooklyn isn’t bad at this time of night. Most of the traffic is packed downtown where all the bars are lined up. Dick takes the highway to avoid the worst of it.

The roar of the city dies off once he goes underground. Down here the HQ looms over him in all its steel glory. Dick’s always thought of it like one giant elevator. It’s all hard angles and sleek, silver walls. Hardly a place one would describe as homey, but it was home to a few people nevertheless.

Dick goes inside after getting his eye and hand scanned by the computer. He heads down the hallway, keeping his footsteps light and quiet out of habit. So far there’s no sign of Jade, Indigo, or Rex in any of the rooms he passes. They’re the most likely to be here around this time. From what Kory told him the other day, Grace has been spending most of her time clubbing, and Anissa has been staying with her dad. He hates to admit it but it’s almost a relief that he doesn’t have to worry about running into either of them.

He ends up finding Roy and Lian in the rec room. Lian is sitting on the leather couch in the middle of the room. She must have had a shower not too long ago because her hair is a little damp and she’s wearing a pair of purple pajamas with unicorns on them. A Cinderella blanket is strewn across her lap and a stuffed rabbit sits discarded on the floor by her feet.

Roy looks small squatting in front of her. His pants are the only sign of his Arsenal gear, and it makes Dick feel slightly out of place since he’s still decked out in full mask and suit. It’s the first time Dick’s seen Roy in person since they brought down Tanner’s operations a week ago. He looks how Dick would expect any parent to look after being targeted by a major sex trafficker: stressed and exhausted.

Those tired eyes of his shift to the doorway where Dick stands, and Dick can see the way Roy looks him over from head to toe, assessing Dick’s condition. He can look as hard as he wants, but he won’t find anything. Dick keeps his face blank and unreadable.

“It still hurts,” Lian whimpers, and both Dick and Roy's attention immediately snaps back to her.

She wraps her arms around her stomach and bends over her lap like she’s going to throw up all over the floor. Roy doesn’t move to try and avoid any possible bouts of vomit. Nothing happens as the seconds tick by. No retching or anything. There’s only the sound of Roy’s hand rubbing up and down Lian’s arm.

“Me and your Uncle Nightwing are gonna get you feeling better soon,” Roy assures her in a gentle voice. “And guess what?”

Lian makes a questioning sound in the back of her throat.

The look Roy shoots Dick is somewhere between caution and amusement. “He’s been playing quiet mouse behind you this whole time.”

Dick braces himself as Lian shoots back up like a rocket. “He’s behind me?” she asks, twisting around in her seat. Dick’s heart starts jackrabbiting because what if she’s scared of him? What if he accidentally triggers her PTSD? What if— “Uncle Nightwing!” Lian shrieks.

Relief shudders through him because she sounds happy to see him. Not scared or angry or disgusted like he feared. She’s looking at him like he just told her he brought her a bag of candy, and that revelation is enough to make him take a breath and finally enter the room.

“Hey, kiddo,” Dick says, hurrying over to the couch so that she doesn’t have to get up. “I missed you.”

Lian reaches for his hand and holds on to it. It’s not like the hug Dick usually gets from her and maybe that’s because she doesn’t want anyone touching her back after the incident. Dick will take anything he can get. His much larger hand closes over her own and he swings them back and forth lightly.

“Me too,” Lian says. She squeezes his hand three times. “Why do you still have your gloves on?”

“My hands are cold,” Dick lies. “Why were you bent over like an accordion just a minute ago?”

“Her tummy’s been hurting,” Roy says with a frown.

“It’s because tigers used to try and eat people,” Lian tells him matter-of-factly. Roy looks like he’s about to correct her but she quickly hurries on. “My brain says there’s danger and it makes my tummy stop working.”

A lightbulb goes off in Dick’s head as he realizes that she’s describing anxiety. A simplified explanation of how the digestive system shuts down and sends blood to other parts of the body when there’s danger.

“My tummy does that too,” Dick says after a pause. “I get a lot of anxiety sometimes. Do you want me to show you how I try to make it go away?”

Lian scrunches her nose. “Do we have to take medicine?”

“Nope. All we need to do is sit up straight and breathe. Breathing really deep helps our brains calm down and makes our tummies feel more relaxed,” Dick explains. He sinks down on the plush couch and demonstrates how she should be sitting. “Now move back until you’re sitting like me.”

Lian does as she’s told and scoots back until she’s resting against the back of the couch. Dick only remembers how short she is when he notices how her feet stick out straight in front of her instead of dangling over the edge of the couch.

“Now tell your daddy to get in position.”

“Daddy,” Lian slaps the free cushion beside her, “sit next to me.”

“Magic word?” Roy prompts.

“Please,” Lian pouts.

“That’s better.” Roy’s knees pop when he shifts out of his crouched position. The whole couch rocks when he falls back against it. “What’s the strat here, Wing? We need to close our eyes or what?”

Dick wants to ask him why he’s acting like he’s never done this before but the playful words stick in his mouth like glue.

“We’ll close our eyes in a second. Lian, I want you to watch how your daddy and I take really deep breaths, okay? Then we’re all going to do it together.”

“I can take really big breaths!” Lian insists. She scrambles out of her pose and gets on her knees. Her little fingers wrap around Dick’s bicep as she leans in close to him. “I can take one million breaths as big as an elephant!”

The tired and apathetic part of him tells him to ignore her kid logic and to get back on track. The uncle part of him is another story. It wants him to be fun and helpful. To distract Lian from the worries and fears she has.

In the end, he does what he always does best: puts on a performance.

“Oh yeah?” Dick challenges with a grin that hopefully doesn’t look as strained as it feels. “I can take five billion breaths as big as a planet.”

“Elephants are bigger than planets,” she says.

“I think maybe the elephants are only bigger in your dreams.”

“Yeah, they are,” Lian agrees because she’s a typical kid who will support anything that proves she’s right in some capacity.

Roy looks amused when he puts his hands on Lian’s shoulders and steers her to sit back on her bottom. “Alright little missy, no more talking. We’re gonna do what Uncle Nightwing says now, okay?”

“Okay,” Lian agrees, looking over at Dick expectantly.

Coaching Lian through the exercise is easy. The most important part is making sure she’s taking breaths that are deep enough to make her stomach expand like a balloon. Dick has her place her hands on top of her stomach so he can see them rise when she inhales.

Roy follows along and Dick can tell that he’s taking advantage of the exercises for his own benefit. His face looks peaceful and relaxed as he follows along with Dick’s instructions to suck in a breath on the count of one and exhale up until the count of ten.

“Keep focusing on counting,” Dick tells them while they exhale. “We don’t want any other thoughts in our heads. No bad thoughts or funny thoughts. Only think about counting to ten.”

They run through a few more cycles. Dick’s pleased when he hears both Lian and Roy’s stomachs grumbling as they exhale. It’s a good sign that the deep breaths are massaging their organs and decreasing any kind of stomach pain.

“That’s it,” Dick says. “We’re all done.” He opens his eyes and sees Lian slumped against the back of the couch. Her hands are still resting on her stomach, but she looks languid instead of tense like she was when he first saw her.

“I’m tired now,” Roy says. His movements are slow as molasses when he slides forward to the edge of the couch and bends over to rest his arms on his thighs. He looks at Lian. “How about you, princess? You feeling any better?”

“Mhmm. My tummy doesn’t feel really uh…”

“Tight?” Dick offers.

“Yeah, it’s not so tight anymore.”

Roy pushes a strand of hair behind her ear. “Good. Mine feels a little better too.”

“Can we do Uncle Nightwing’s breathing thing again tomorrow?” she asks through a yawn.

“Sure thing,” Roy nods. His attention shifts to Dick. “Are you gonna still be here to lead us through it?”

This isn’t some kind of test but it feels like one. It feels like if he says no then he’s only proving that he’s a bad friend. That he can’t be relied on. He doesn’t want to give Roy that impression because it’s not true. Roy can rely on him the same way Dick relies on Roy. He hopes showing up here tonight is proof of that.

“That’s the plan,” he says, voice soft.

Roy leans over the couch and squeezes Dick’s knee gently. “You sure?” he asks, and his eyes roam over Dick’s face like he’s trying to find evidence that Dick is lying.

“Yeah, I’m sure.” He pats Roy’s hand reassuringly in the same way Alfred's done for him and Bruce a hundred times. It's only now that he realizes it's a habit he's picked up.

Lian suddenly leans into Dick’s side and presses her weight against his arm. She pats both his and Roy’s hands.

“I’m sure too,” she says, and this time Dick can’t help but smile.

[hankeliza]

Hate to be cliche, but here goes.

This decade has been some shit. 2010. Best year of my life. I’m 17, I have my soul mate and best friend every single day of my life. No bills and making way too much money. I got the love of my life, Rome. I am so cool in my mind and just life was fucking GREAT. I met corbin that year and I was legit in absolute bliss.

Feb 2012 my best friend moves to fl and that was so great but I am in absolute shambles. I am lost I am unhappy. This is where it all goes wrong and only now, 8 years later do I realize the codependency issues I had with jenna. I fucking loved that chick from the depths of my goddamn soul, we could speak and make decisions and plans with just locking eyes for a blink of a second. So bc I am sad, lost and unable to make sense of my selfish and immature feelings, I take it out on her and a whole slough of klonopin. Corbin and I are doing bad and this is when it should’ve ended.

April 2012 (hah time is funny af) I do some shady shit, but not to the magnitude it was portrayed. Life moves on and I get back with corbin. This is my new person to rely on. I need him bc he stuck thru it with me and gained my whole hearted trust that he loves me, even when ugly and I love him through all of his ugly. We are ugly and we are in love and nothing in the world matters to me anymore besides him.

Oct 2012 I finally am ready to move outta stc. But corbins with me. I beg and beg and beg to please go to Tampa but nah, we go to Miami. It’ll be easier, Adam will take us in. He still is this big mature, always with it guy, I don’t know him, that’s why. We get there, nothing much to even talk about. Great times but eh. Leavin it at that. Shit happens and we get out of dodge like some fuckin thief’s in the night. Drive two days to portland. I won’t get into all the beautiful shit I saw bc that’ll take too long but, here we are.

I live with a naked hippie that is actually psychotic and oh, later on turns out she’s making us pay for a house SHE IS SQUATTING IN. But anyway, things happened (again adam) and we move to the city city. Won’t even get in to the shit that transpired there, but now I’m moving back home.

Feb 2013 (wow really seeing some timelines matching up of my most unpleasant times of my life?!¿¡) so I’m back home. I don’t sleep, I don’t eat. I think I weighed 110 while standing 5’8. My dads on parole, only time I see sunlight is when he needs to meet with his PO. Nicole nurtures me and literally does everything in her power to make me be better, but I am not ready to feel happiness or bond with any other human. I am not ready to move on or up or out. I am stuck. Corbin moves home. Ahhh yes. My safety blanket is back and I can be happy again (hahahah)

So in the meantime while I was sad Nicole and I are partying, late nights to meijer and rite aid, getting high and snacks and shit is just fucking awesome. She meets the love of her life and he takes her and even me in to his whole friend crowd and I am HAPPY and feel bliss again. I have friends? Imagine that. They fall madly in love and then heh, they move. Well shit. Now mind you I have totally capability to see them whenever I please bc Nicole is an open door policy. But truly I’m lazy, I like convenience and still wrapped up in my own stupid bitchass, (that I can now see, but then couldn’t) and it’s back to corbin and I.

So now it’s getting close to end of 2013 and all I pretty much do is spend every waking moment with corbin. I don’t mean to make that sound so awful, then I loved it. Now, it’s all so bleak.

2014 hits. I’m in and out of jobs. Corbin and I live off of pop can returns. I’m still 21 so like, none of that mattered and I didn’t care about a future. He gets a job and I finally get into the courthouse. We start doing ~molly~ heavy. Locking ourselves in a bedroom from Friday-Sunday. Every weekend. When you hear “ecstasy/drugs ruined my sex life” from older people, you don’t really know what to make of that. When I tell you drugs ruined our sex life and our likeness for each other, now I fucking get it. I stopped smoking weed 24/7 bc I was paranoid of losing my job. Not much more to that year or 2015 than chemical pills and being locked in a room and outdoor adventures with my dog.

2016, I finally convince corbin to {for the love of god} attempt to get his license back (which he did, and then ruined again, but that comes later) so we’re really making moves, honestly for us we were doing shit. We had a marker board calendar AND meeting our goals/deadlines !!! His dad gets oxys, and we’ve been borrowing his Vicodin for idk, a year or 3 at this point. This is kinda when things get fuzzy. But oxys come and got damn do they feel good. But only recreational. It wasn’t serious then.

Corbin gets prescribed adderall. Not much more we need to dive in to with that jazz but oxys and addies were all we ate until about the end of 2017. Pills are gone. Let’s fucking driiiiink.

2018

So I developed an alcohol issue at this point. Still battling it to this day. But I don’t really remember much. Did some cool shit, went to Europe. Met a girl that I’ve never loved kissing more. She was nuts. I moved out of our apartment we got together and back home, re-up w/ Rickey, we have fun. He cheats on me with the girl he got pregnant and neglected (they’re engaged now, congrats guys) I’m completely broken and alone because at this point i have managed to push every waking soul away from me and experience the weirdest fucking shit ever that I can only explain as spiritual, or maybe it was satanic. It burned and hurt and scared the ballsacks out of me. Can’t kill your self if you’re a pussy, turns out.

I spent this whole year trying to find friends, wrong crowd. I developed a relationship with a coworker who still to this day has my heart and soul and I love him and will always hope the best. He is the greatest comfort I had but it was only ever from 5pm - until we finished having drinks and sex and then back to being alone. I even confessed my confused love for him and he set me straight. He showed me more about being strong than anyone ever. I love you D.

The end of September I finally meet up with a dude I can’t take my damn eyeballs off for years. I finally mustered up the courage after making excuses for about 2 weeks why I couldnt meet up with him. So I come over. It’s raining so hard. I couldn’t find his house. I just wanted the god damn dick, and go home. He didn’t let that happen.

We see one another mainly every single day except Wednesday’s because he has plans that day every week. I tried my hardest to ghost him multiple times but he didn’t let that happen either. We are both drinking a lot because we are both sad but our company really really reaaaally made up for the sadness. He is the funniest person I’ve ever met and I think he thought that about me too.

November 21st comes and he is being weird and I am constantly nervous around him so I get weird bc I think I did something or he’s gonna tell me to go home, I didn’t know. He finally says he wants to be my man, like full time man. I have a bf? I don’t want one but something about you is fckin freaky you beautiful boy. Everything is coming together.

And here we go: December 21. 1 month is all it took to mess it up.

Leaving my work party, ironically after getting all of my drinks bought for me :) , I go to jail. Jail was not as bad as I expected. I was a good criminal so I got to sit in a different room w/ a tv until shift change. Oh and ! my high school classmate was a worker there so that was neat ! (jesuschrist) anyway; dont have Laynes number memorized, my family and I just watched my grandpa die, gasping for air 10 day prior. Can’t call my mom. Scared to call my dad (who was the nicest of anyone) soooooo corbin it is. I dealt with his jail problems time after time so, his turn I guess.

Welp it’s 2019. Not much to say. Layne stuck through all of it with me and I have no fucking clue why. Got a therapist. Stopped drinking whiskey completely. Bought a vacuum and couch. Live with my way too supportive boyfriend. My family fucking loves him. I am .... growing ? stronger ? mentally ? as every day passes ? because of him ? He teaches me so much about moving on, life and just thinking before doing. Life ain’t that serious. I love you Layne. I completely do. I started alcohol classes and I went in with such a shitty attitude, like I’m better than everyone? (Been my issue for, forever) I fucking love my group sessions. I am for once not alone with the unpopular shit I struggle with. Addiction is so real and I always thought it was a stupid ass excuse for being lazy but hahhhhhh karma loves me.

I’ve been struggling so hard with jenna. I have talked to a handful of people and most have said it’s been blown out of proportion but, don’t hurt your friends. I finally fucking wrapped it up when I got ahold of her, tried to anyway, before Christmas. I explained a lot, now that I’ve had years to sit back and reflect on myself and my bullshit and I can’t blame her (side bar: she still didn’t care lol.) But I am fuckin over it. My feelings got hurt to absolute fuck about some things and instead of being mature, I fucked her over, because I felt fucked over. But I’m sorry, I did that, I take responsibility and best wishes forever but an anvil weight has finally been lifted off my chest and I feel like I can finally move the fuck on and it’s such a great feeling to get rid of something that’s been eating me alive.

So basically, the last two years ate me the fuck alive. This year I meditated on shit. We will see how 2020 goes but I am ready considering what I’ve done to myself, been through and I still am fucking alive and trying. Being a human is dumb but it’s aight sometimes. Getting better. Good luck y’all.

[minsugagal]

So I’mma make a little rant/post about Riverdale lol.

this is pretty much what I’m thinking about each character right now. And at the end I’ll talk about my feelings of the show overall. I mean this is my blog so I can post what I want right? Including about tv shows I watch. 

[I included minor characters and I’m going to try to give the characters a moral alignment feel free to correct it if you want remember I’m only up to episode 10 so I might make a new post on their alignments after i finish the last 3 eps]

1. Archie Andrews

This kid....like what??? Okay he’s a decent good guy....kinda...sorta...i guess. Like he means well, and he tries....sorta....to do his best. He isn’t perfect of course but then again most teen boys aren’t so eh you know. But bruh can you like sort your hormones out cuz...at this point I don’t really think you even actually have liked a single girl. Like you need to figure yourself out and decide on a girl you like. I’ve had it with this flip flopping mess like you’re a basic man whore at this point. I am glad that he hasn’t given up music and is still chasing that. At least he’s loyal to that I guess. I think he needs to realize he can’t please everyone and he does more harm than good by trying to. 

Also why you ain’t helping your friends out? Like you just letting them roam around trying to solve this mystery and you ain’t doing much. 

Alignment: Neutral Good

2. Betty Cooper

Oh Betty....dear.....dear....sweet...little Betty. I don’t know what to do with you either. Like I get you like having justice and seeing things done right but girl you ain’t a superhero. You are not the end all be all of Riverdale. You’re not it’s savior. So turn it down a bit sweetie. I mean keep trying to solve that mystery and all but just don’t be quite so headstrong and reckless about it okay. 

Her huge downfall is she trusts way too easily and forgives way too easily. Like also forgiveness doesn’t mean you have to take that person back into your life. Like does she enjoy getting screwed over and hurt??? I don’t understand. 

She might also be bipolar or another form of mental illness. I’m not sure but she does have signs that lead me to think that. Maybe Season 2 will expand on that more? Maybe she’ll end up locked up like her sister.....idk bruh but something is off with Betty. She’s sweet but like a safe berry look alike that you think safe but you’re not entirely sure if poison lies under the sweet taste or not. Good Luck with this one. 

Alignment: Chaotic Good

3. Veronica Lodge

What is this chick doing? She’s an emotional roller coaster. One minute she’s fine than she isn’t. One minute she’s angry then she isn’t. Like I can’t quite figure her out. I know she’s trying really hard to be a good person and I can honestly say she isn’t completely fucking it up all the way. But she doesn’t exactly have it right either. She’s going through a lot and I can understand her being upset and a bit revengeful. But I think she honestly has a good heart. She just kinda has to keep chiseling away at that hard ice cold exterior she had before. She’ll find that pure heart of gold eventually. 

She’s also a tad bit too sensitive like she’s letting things that shouldn’t bother her too much bother her ALOT! 

Alignment: Neutral Good

4.Jughead Jones

So far this kid is the only sane one of the main bunch. Like he has a lot of shit going on in his own life, plus he’s dealing with his friends’ shit and helping them out and like he still manages to stay cool about it. Okay so he’s had one freak out on Betty so far but...I mean I think he’s allowed that. I mean he hasn’t done anything else. He hasn’t complained about his life or anything he’s just kind of accepted everything in stride like “This is my life this is what is happening gotta keep going”. I think he’s doing the best he can minding his circumstances. 

Alignment: Chaotic Neutral 

5. Hermione Lodge

What am I honestly supposed to think of this woman? I really have no idea. Like I don’t hate her, I don’t necessarily like her. She just is kinda both a support beam and a stumbling block to the other characters all at once. She has a lot of secrets though. Some I’m sure are still yet to have made their appearance. I’d like to think she’s a good person but....I’m not entirely sure of that. She’s got some shady shit going down. I hope she can get her life together and decide who and what she really wants to become and not a woman tied to her imprisoned husband and her commitment to him. I think right now that’s what’s holding her back. But hey 3 more eps and another season hopefully she’ll grow as a person for the better. 

Alignment: Neutral Good

6. Fred Andrews

Honestly he’s a really good person. He’s doing his best for his son. And he does his best for his friends and people he cares about. He’s just trying to find some good in the world and a safe place for his son even though the world is against him. 

Alignment: Lawful Good [okay minus the keeping Jughead out of jail fake timeslip situation]

7. Kevin Keller

He’s a good kid. I don’t have too much to say about him. He’s loyal to his friends and boyfriend. He’s just doing his best at being a teenager and a friend and a boyfriend and a son. 

Alignment: Lawful Good [he is the sheriff's son after all] 

8. Cheryl Blossom

This BITCH!!! Sometimes I don’t even know what to think of her. Like one minute she seems kinda sweet and then the next i wanna punch her face in. I don’t understand her and her actions. Like I get her parents are uptight bitches themselves but why is she just so.....ugh!!! Why does she have these really small moments of sweetness where it’s almost like “Hey maybe she’s turning into a decent person.....oh wait nah”. I’d like to yank her red hair off her head for Betty and Veronica. 

Alignment: Lawful Evil

9. Alice Cooper

Ooooohhhhh this BITCH! Okay let me just say my opinion of her has slightly changed since the beginning. Quite some character development for only 10 episodes. But hey when it really comes down to it a mama bear is gonna protect her baby bears. In the beginning I just thought she was a cold hearted ice woman set on being the dictator of Riverdale. Ruling with an iron fist her children, husband, “friends”, and all other citizens of the city. But it’s come to light that she might not be as big of a bitch as she could’ve been. Like she actually has a hint of kindness and motherly love in her. So maybe she isn’t all bad. But we’ll see what the next 3 eps show.

Alignment: Lawful Evil

10. Josie Mccoy

This girl is one hell of a DIVA! Understand her though, music is her life. It’s everything to her. So when anyone or anything tries to jeopardize that she isn’t going to stand for it. She stands tall and proud and strong. Even though she has her own personal battles and family issues. She is still proud of who she is and not ashamed to show off her ears and tail. haha She can be a bit overwhelming and maybe a bit too serious but I honestly do like her. She has a passion and while it might seem like she’s being a bitch sometimes she just doesn’t want anything risking her dream. 

Alignment: Lawful Neutral 

11. F.P Jones

Man oh man where to even start with this guy. Like what are you doing!?? You’re nuts. Like okay so you had a good run with the Serpents. I get it they treat you well, you feel like you belong but dude. You could honestly have a good life again if you’d just clean your ass up. Get a job, work hard, go to like rehab for the alcohol. GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER! Maybe your son would like to be around you then, maybe he’d genuinely believe in you and trust you again. You could have your family back. But instead you keep fucking shit up. Also at this point your a high contender for being the murderer. 

I feel like somewhere deep down he’s a good person. He could be a good dad and a good husband. But instead he keeps letting this side of him win. He keeps listening to that voice inside him saying “Once a fuckup always a fuckup you can’t fix it now” I guess in the end I’m not really sure where he’s gonna end up. Like he has the possibility to be good. But for now he isn’t. 

Alignment: Neutral Evil 

12. Hal Cooper

Good grief this man! How can you honestly have so much hate over what happened decades ago? Like time to let things go man! How can you be such a douche? Like hurting one daughter isn’t enough you have to go on and hurt your other daughter plus your wife. Where are you going to stop. When will you hate end? I honestly thought that Alice was the mastermind behind the evil that is the Cooper parents but it was the dad all this time. He’s the second contender for murderer. I mean I won’t know till the end of the season I guess but I have this like gut wrenching feeling every time i see him on the screen. Like if he’s capable of sending his own daughter away and trying to have her kill the baby. Well what else is he capable of??? All that hate can’t lead to anything good. 

Alignment: Chaotic Evil

13. Penelope Blossom

Doesn’t this woman give you the chills just looking at her? She’s fuckin creepy! I don’t know if it’s just because she doesn’t have much of a character besides insane mom. Or if it’s the fact that I have no idea what she’s capable of doing. But I’d like to hope that maybe she isn’t really all that horrible and maybe she does actually care about Cheryl and her deceased son as much as she makes people think she does. 

Alignment: Lawful Evil

14. Valerie Brown

Awww sweet sweet Valerie. She’s so sweet and honest and pure. She just wants to be a good person. She also truly liked Archie and he blew that shit up. Like what to go fucktard. It’s okay though because Valerie deserves better. She’s a sweet girl and she deserves someone who’s gonna treat her right. Also I hope Josie will ease up on her now a bit and be more best friend than group leader. Valerie is talented and deserves to have that shown. 

Alignment: Lawful Good

15. Clifford Blossom

I don’t even know everything about him yet. But I already know he’s just pure evil. Like the dude seems to have no heart. Not for his wife, his daughter or his deceased son. Like have you seen him be visibly upset?? I haven’t. Like the mom ain’t good but she was at least a little shaken about her son’s death. He’s just kinda like “Oh yeah...he’s dead...okay”. Also he’s a strong contender for the murderer. Like there is something so off about him that yeah I could believe that he killed his own son. 

Alignment: Chaotic Evil

16. Mayor Mccoy

I mean she’s mayor and all but I’m not entirely sure she’s all good. Like I think she has some secrets up her sleeve that she isn’t letting people know about. Also not to mention she’s kinda got a weird relationship with her daughter. Like she’s proud of her and loves her but also puts a shit ton of pressure on her to be perfect.....yeah she’s one of THOSE moms. I mean I guess she might be a good person. I don’t particularly like her though. 

Alignment: Lawful Neutral [I mean she is the mayor she has to follow some rules somewhere] 

17. Polly Cooper

Poor Polly she’s been through a shit storm. She didn’t deserve any of this. She just wanted to be happy with Jason. But no one would let her. She’s been dragged away and told she’s crazy, lied to, isolated. She’s just lonely and scared and wants someone to love her and care about her. She just wants her family and sadly she has to deal with the fact that the father of her unborn babies is dead. Like that’s not okay. This is more than a teenager should have to deal with. I just hope she can come to find happiness eventually. She deserves that. 

Alignment: Chaotic Good

18. Joaquin DeSantos

Note: He looks like a young John Travolta which I think is probably what the producers were going for. 

Anyway I’m not sure what to think of this kid yet. I’m waiting to see where his inner morals lay. Like yeah I know he’s apart of the Serpents and the loyalty to the gang is strong but that’s not to say that his inner feelings for Kevin that are starting to grow and show will lead to his own moral decisions on what he’s going to do. I think he’s gonna play a major part in the next 3 episodes. I hope my assumption of his alignment doesn’t prove me wrong. 

Alignment: [Currently] Lawful Evil 

[Assumed Future Alignment] Neutral Good

19. Chuck Clayton

Ugh this BITCH! Yeah I called him a bitch that’s what he is. I hate him honestly. He’s a sickening sexual harraser. I can’t stand him! And for him to stand and act like what he did was no big deal or that it doesn’t matter or that it’s okay. The worst part is he may be a character but men like him exist. No wonder he made Betty snap, he’d probably make me snap, He’s so sickening and ugh he’s a snake. I hope maybe he’ll see the error of his ways eventually but I highly doubt it. 

Alignment: Neutral Evil

20. Ethel Muggs

Sweet Ethel, she doesn’t deserve all the things that have been done to her. What has she done wrong? Nothing. She loves her family and her friends and she does good. She’s just a sweet girl caught in this spiral of hell that is Riverdale. Maybe she should move she doesn’t deserve this shit storm. 

Alignment: Lawful Good

Riverdale

This show is really soo good. I think majority of the characters are well rounded, they don’t just do things because they are one dimensional and lifeless. Cheryl isn’t a bitch just because she’s supposed to be. Betty isn’t trying to bring justice to the Jason’s death just because she’s supposed. They all have reasons and justifications behind every action. It’s a well written show. I enjoy it a lot. 

Also I just love over all arching mysteries. Like yeah each episode has it’s own story and plot but there is also that over arching mystery that is yet to be solved and each episode adds a tiny bit of the puzzle and I love it!!! 

Note: I was going to put all the characters but I thought that was a bit much and a lot of them are just kinda not super important I mean like how much could I really write about Reggie or Ginger? So I left them out. Also no spoilers please! I wanna finish watching it. 

[chaorelance]

storytime

So, look.

It’s time I kinda come clean, a bit. I’ve kind of been rushing over a few people in storytime who have been really present and, well. Kind of some of the most important to me during my stay in BTG, and absolutely why I even went as far as entering the Chi-scape.

...For Nathan, I’ll kill the joke. It’s because that’s really the best way to describe him. Nathan was the generic Protagonist of our group. He was the Faceless Male. He was... honestly, bar that one rape-thing incident a good friend and really unnotable. Which just made that whole shit even more striking.

But he’s really bland and unless you want me to describe anime protagonists for a post I don’t think I need to. I mean, get back to me if you really want me to.

But.

For Resaiyu, that’s because to talk about Resaiyu really was to me and who they were I had to set the scene first. I really, really had to introduce all these people and things.

So that’s today.

And because it’s today, step back with me to the very beginning.

The first time I actually met the infamous Miss Montclaire was in a Final Fantasy game Jin was running, because everyone had... basically already established relationships and friendships when I joined. The game was closing and like, Boton was there, boasting about how she had fucked all the people which like

Remember, she was like 20+ and we were all minors. That woman had issues, seriously.

And I was kind of there...standing on the outskirts, not really knowing anyone.

And then Miss Montclaire happened (once Boton stopped boasting about all the hot erp they had) and I had a friend? And that’s it.

Resaiyu just -made- friends with me, and I don’t even know how it happened. Sometime between the start of JIn finishing this shit up because the man could not keep a story going, and boton storming out for some reason we were friends. Like that was nothing new.

And like, then I found out they were a ~girl~ and oh no teenage hormones and I was a tsundere in their Harem, too. Within the span of maybe like 3-4 hours.

And while not to downplay that- It’s also time I like, properly address that.

I’ve said kind of for a while I was the Tsundere of the Harem, and shit, as if I just straight liked her and wasn’t saying it to her face.

But that’s not fair, because even Little Bun Blue is me, and frankly this may sound strange- but I am usually 90% right.

And I think even for the ridiculous Tsundere Act, Little Bun Blue was right. I don’t think I REALLY liked Resaiyu, in the end. I think there may have been Chemistry I Missed in hindsight, but I think, honestly, I was more In Love with the Idea of Being In Love. Not to even mention Little Bun Blue had trust issues and an even worse view on Romance than present Me, owing especially to his parents just getting divorced.

But like. If you asked me, with a gun to my head, to list three people I had a crush on in my lifetime, Resaiyu would’ve been straight after the obvious.

And even if I frankly didn’t ‘Like’ her, I sure as hell played the role of the lovesick Tsundere the most. I think everyone, as we all belonged to the Resaiyu Harem, played a love interest to her at some point. But I -bid- for that role probably the most, and I think bar one exception (which ended with a LOT of tragedy and mangst, which somehow ended up the closest thing to a good RP in a Chi game, but that’s maybe a side story if people want to actually get an idea what a chi game was like) I never actually played the role, because I was a tsundere and denied it.

Okay maybe there was another time, but somehow I ended up with a baker but that’s a really, really, later story.

But yeah, after that Resaiyu started showing up everywhere. Even though I had never met them before while I was hanging with Beamed, they showed up there now. Resaiyu was an ALLFORCE of BTG, which is part of -how- they built their Harem. The only person close to being in as much of everything was Nathan, but even then Resaiyu clearly just... did more.

The honestly, clearest sign you were sunk in BTG, such as when Gal finally gave up, was when Resaiyu stopped showing up. Because everyone followed her. Bar like, Me an Nathan in that case I guess.

In short, having Resaiyu’s favor was the lifeblood of BTG for a while. Like, before Chi happened and that didn’t matter. And, like, in hindsight? I think that’s actually a lot of why I managed to accumulate so well into the community. I was non-threatening and nice, but I was also non-threatening, nice, and favored by the literal goddess of the community because we were all horny nerdbros and there was one girl tbh

so like, I’ve said a lot about Resaiyu- but like

None of this actually -describes- Resaiyu.

This is what she was to BTG. Not... as a person. And that’s a lot of why I say I think I was just kind of... Not really ‘actually’ crushing on them or whatever?

A lot of this was just Resaiyu being a Girl in a mostly male Community. Especially after Boton was chased the fuck off and M kinda disappeared. And if nothing else, I think that was why I focused so hard on them.

They were kind of like me I think. Or more that, really, in context of everyone else I was like Resaiyu with a slight twinge to aggressiveness. Resaiyu was just kind of softspoken, kind of shy, and overall a nice person.

In hindsight, I’m not convinced they weren’t actually Amra remembering how much they liked Monster Girls, but that’s the booze talking.

But like, that’s not saying a lot. When I say that and I refer to myself- I fully realize that’s because I did not express myself much early BTG. I don’t think anyone I played with, even Resaiyu, who like- was probably the actual closest to me, actually KNEW me.

I acted like this because I didn’t want to reveal who I was. I thought that, on the internet-  you just... acted like a blank slate? Not you. I was afraid if I revealed too much of who I was (while being me) I would somehow get like

Tracked down and murdered.

...and okay, I’ve been doing a subtle lie the entire time, because I KNOW why they were kind of like me. Because they were explicitly hiding something.

And I’ve been -intentionally- obscuring that.

See.

Hensou and Kiba for the most part, were radical figures. I don’t think Hensou was a good person, but they had a point in that BTG was being stagnant and had a lot of fuckin’ problems, and Resaiyu was kind of... one of them.

An unhealthy devotion to a single girl? Yeah, maybe we should stop.

and like.

Remember how I talked about Jin and Ookami? And how in BTG, you REALLY didn’t trust people to be who they said they were? Everyone had to be a white pasty nerdbro like us, ebin early 2000s internet culture dude.

...so like, See.

I think you kinda get it.

So, someday in the later half of the Chi era, I come into the server and Kiba and Hensou are like rapidly Pming me until I say just take this shit to public and before I know it they’re all like ‘Resaiyu is Actually A Dude And We Have Receipts’.

Which, bar none, is probably one of the clearest parts I can remember of BTG for a lot of reasons.

The two were fucking ecstatic, and they had pretty much hard proof and were like

Ready to boast and start shit and make everyone drive off their beloved ‘goddess’.

And Resaiyu comes on, the receipts are pulled, and everything is silent and.... Res just admits to it all with no fuss. Straight up admits to doing it all because they thought they’d fit in better with everyone if they did, which like, yeah.

Honestly, wow did that pan out.

Everything is like, dead silent.

And then, collectively, everyone straight up goes ‘alright, well cool whatev’. And not even remotely halfheartedly.

Hensou and Kiba go fucking nuts because without even a second thought, we all just straight up ignored their big revelation and everything just went on anyway with the knowledge Resaiyu was a guy named Paul on the other side of the screen.

The harem kind of like

Wasn’t even a factor anymore, because frankly it was already basically down to me and Nathan at this point. And Nathan was ~TOO COOL~ to act like he cared, and that gave me all the exodus I needed to justify my year of tsundereness.

So in short, They got away scot-free because fuck it they were our friend anyway, and we all got to watch Kiba and Hensou be REALLY MAD we didn’t freak the fuck out and exile one of like 5 people left playing with us.

And I had a fucking smile on the entire time because it made Hensou upset.

...for the most part, I don’t think the whole thing changed how I acted around Resaiyu either. I had been such a good tsundere I honestly hadn’t even considered I liked them until I started Storytime.

Like, yeah. Still easily one of the top three friends of BTG. I don’t know if I’d want to meet them again but... like. It’d be cool?

idk.

Not sure how to end this one. But like- in short: BTG was such a weird community the one woman we didn’t kick out and like everyone crushed on was legit actually a guy (atleast at the time, no idea where they’re at now.).

And man.

That is one of the biggest rides I wish I could’ve properly taken you all on of BTG.

[thesassybooskter]

THE CAJUN DOCTOR by Sandra Hill: Release Spotlight & Excerpt

AVAILABLE TODAY

New York Times Bestselling Author Sandra Hill delivers another Tante Lulu Adventure as twin brothers leave Alaska to discover their Cajun roots

Dr. Daniel LeDeux and pilot Aaron LeDeux travel to the swampy bayous of Louisiana, where they discover a long-lost family. The usually stoic Daniel, a burned-out pediatric oncologist, is especially startled by the interfering LeDeux matriarch, Tante Lulu, bless her crazy heart, who wastes no time in setting him up with local rich girl Samantha Starr.

Scarred by a nasty divorce from a philandering New Orleans physician, Samantha has sworn off men, especially doctors. When Samantha’s step-brother gets into serious trouble, she must ask Daniel for help. But Samantha faces even more trouble when the handsome doctor casts his smoldering Cajun eyes her way.

The steamy heat of the bayou, along with the wacky matchmaking efforts of Tante Lulu, a herd of animal rescue rejects, including a depressed pot belly pig, and some world-class sexual fantasies create enough heat and humor to make both Daniel and Samantha realize that love and laughter can mend even the most broken heart.

  Buy Online: Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Kobo | iBooks

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  Excerpt

She smiled at him as he stood to follow her. There were no longer any tears in her eyes. Forget about sparkling emeralds, he decided then. Her eyes were murky green pools designed to lure a guy in and make him do things he didn’t even know he wanted to do. And he was the dumb trout who’d taken her bait. Hooked, lined and hot damn sinkered!

It was probably some Southern voodoo kind of crap. Maybe he should ask Tante Lulu for a spell to ward off Samantha’s allure. He could only imagine the old bat’s reaction. She’d be calling for a fais do do, a party down on the bayou, and the theme would be, “Daniel LeDeux Ain’t Gay, hallelejuah!”

But then he watched Samantha’s buttocks move in the red silky pants as she walked out of the room. Was there anything prettier than a heart-shaped ass on a woman? And he decided, maybe not. And those long limbs . . . man, what a creative male could do with those!

Hot damn hell! He decided he could live with the spell or whatever the hell it was, thank you very much!

Any lewd thoughts he might have been entertaining were interrupted abruptly by a loud pounding on the front door. They looked at each other in question.

He arched his brows.

She shrugged.

The dog halted in its tracks toward the kitchen.

The cougar cat stopped mid stretch.

The pig raised its head and sniffed the air.

Then they all erupted with their respective sounds of alert. Barking, growling, meowing, and oinking. A female squeak of dismay, as in, “Oh, Rhett, the Yankees are comin’!” A male grunt of disgust, as in “What next?” All of which alerted the bird to voice its opinion, and the puppies and other cats to join in the chorus.

More pounding on the door.

“Let’s just ignore it,” she whispered.

The German Shepherd let loose with a wild howl that could probably be heard a block away, definitely through a measly door. Then the old dog lay down on the floor, its muzzle between its front paws, all tired out from the effort.

“I doubt whoever is there will just go away. Let me handle it,” he offered, also in a whisper. I gotta get my Rhett on once in a while, he joked with himself. Then, he added, “Do you have a gun?”

“No. Damn, I knew I should have bought a gun. Just this evening I decided to ask Tante Lulu if she had an extra one. But I didn’t have a chance to call her yet.”

He gave her a glance of surprise; he hadn’t been serious.

That’s all he . . . she . . . needed. Southern belle with a pistol. She’d probably shoot her eye out. At the least, everyone up and down the bayou would know about it, thanks to the Mouth of the South.

Daniel was beginning to feel like Alice in Wonderland . . . or rather, Alex in Wonderland . . . and he’d fallen down some crazy-ass Southern rabbit hole. Forget Scarlett O’Hara. His Alice would be wearing some silky red short shorts. And high heels. And nothing on top. And “Pretty Woman” would be playing in the background.

He could hear Aaron laughing in his head. Twins were like that sometimes. They shared long-distance thoughts and feelings. In fact, some scientists claimed that even during sex . . . well, never mind! Suffice it to say, it gave new meaning to multiple orgasms.

To the Aaron in his head, Daniel said, Hey, it’s my fantasy. If I want bimbo Alice, I get bimbo Alice.

More Aaron laughter.

Daniel and Samantha walked softly toward the front door where Samantha peeked through the security hole and declared in a whisper, “I think it’s the mafia.”

“How can you tell?”

“Well, it’s not Nick. And there are two of them. And they look . . . mafia-ish.”

He pushed her aside to look for himself. What he saw was two men, their faces distorted through the fisheye lens in the peephole. They were scowling with impatience at their knocking not being answered. Definitely not Welcome Wagon, or Jehovah’s Witnesses, or a passing traveler in need of directions. No Gone with the Wind Yankees, either. The short one wore a tight “Sleep With the Fishes, Motherfucker” T-shirt over a muscular chest and bulging biceps; there were tattoos on his neck and forearms. The other dude . . . taller, but equally muscular. . . wore a T-shirt with the logo “Pit Bulls Rule” under an open denim shirt. There was a livid scar on his cheek that lifted one side of his mouth in a perpetual grin. The Mutt and Jeff of creeps!

Daniel could swear he saw the shine of a pistol under the denim shirt. He amended his assessment to “the Mutt and Jeff of dangerous creeps.”

Okay, definitely mafia-ish.

“Samantha Starr! You in dere, chère. We doan want no trouble here. Jist open the door, yes.” This from Mutt, the short one.

Okay, definitely Dixie Mafia-ish.

“Call 911,” Daniel advised Samantha.

She shook her head.

Daniel wasn’t convinced that her way was the best way, but there was no time to argue. He kicked off his shoes, toed off his socks, and used both hands to mess up his hair. He tugged out his T-shirt that had been tucked inside the waistband of his jeans. As an added touch, he undid the button on the fly of his pants and zipped down halfway.

“What are you doing?” she asked in an undertone.

“Pretending I was in bed.”

“Why would you be . . . oh!” Her cheeks bloomed with color.

He put a forefinger to his lips, signaling silence, then put the security chain on the door and opened it several inches. “Yeah? What do you guys want?” he snarled at the two figures on the doorstep.

Surprised, they backed up a step. They had to have seen him enter a short time ago, but apparently they hadn’t been expecting a man to answer the door, or him in particular, as evidenced by Mutt’s remark, “You ain’t Angus Starr.”

“No shit, Dick Tracey,” Daniel countered, starting to close the door.

But the taller, scar-faced dude, Jeff, stuck his booted foot into the opening. “Wait a fuckin’ minute. Where’s Samantha Starr? Bet she knows where that stupid-ass brother of hers is, guar-an-teed.”

“Angus isn’t her brother, exactly,” Daniel commented, as if that mattered. “He’s actually the son of one of her father’s—”

Scar-face made a growling noise.

“Why do you want Angus anyway?”

“None of yer damn bizness, you!” Mutt said, putting his hand inside his pants pocket, as if reaching for a weapon.

“Hold on. I’ll go get her,” Daniel said.

Stepping behind the door, he acted quickly. Messing Samantha’s hair into a sexy mess, he pressed her up against the wall and, before she could yell or kick him in the nuts, he leaned down to kiss her, hard and deep, even nipping at her bottom lip so that she would open for him.

Then he forgot why he’d made a move on her.

  About Sandra Hill

Sandra Hill is a graduate of Penn State and worked for more than 10 years as a features writer and education editor for publications in New Jersey and Pennsylvania. Writing about serious issues taught her the merits of seeking the lighter side of even the darkest stories. She is the wife of a stockbroker and the mother of four sons.

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THE CAJUN DOCTOR by Sandra Hill: Release Spotlight & Excerpt was originally published on The Sassy Bookster

[omgnsfwisnsfw-blog]

NSFW #2.1 It All Begins Again

OOC: title is intentional :P

A few months ago, the two of them watched from their knees as their world was ripped away from them. After that, John felt it was necessary to reevaluate his worldview. A source of their misery had confided to them that now they finally understood the lesson he was trying to impart. To be like him. Those ideals would soil their legacy as champion just as John believed they defined this person that while he begrudgingly respected, cared very little for. And so he wanted to go home. His request was obliged by his partner, a person who, deep down, couldn’t deny him anything. If John Bishop Church asked for the moon, Mike McGuire would find some way to pull it from the sky for him, catastrophic tidal activity be damned. Yet, even though they granted him what he asked for- the immediate cessation of their current occupation- it didn’t sit well with them. Far from it. The abrupt loss of something they’d loved so much for so long, for the second time in their life no less, filled Mike with a heaving sea of bitterness. One night’s full expulsion in the form a destructive eruption of white-hot temper should have quelled it, at least they’d hoped. They didn’t want to direct their anger at John, as he’d had enough denied him in his life. And after a long discussion, Mike resolved to let it go, to get over their bad feelings over leaving what was, in truth, a toxic environment and start over. No more complaints were made on Mike’s part, no sulking or wanton destruction. There was, however, a slightly distressing amount of Labatt Blue. John noticed. Usually sat in his recliner and read as Mike imbibed. Whatever was on the television became the subject of their anger. The Mets losing. The Bruins winning. The worst though is when Mike flipped to their previous employer. The anger was laser focused. Two weeks prior to their sudden reemergence, it had been a night just like that. “Motherfucker.” Green eyes, slightly hazed over, glared at the handsome Texan brandishing the ornate gold belt, their lips curling into something between a sneer and a snarl. The ugliness being directed at the screen seemed out of place in the cozy, if not mismatched, living room. Their hands balled up into taut fists- well, one did, and the other gripped the amber glass bottle so tightly that it seemed that it might shatter. “Look at that fuckin’ pukestain. Sittin’ pretty at the top of the goddamn heap. Somebody shoulda knocked him into the fuckin’ pits by now. And a’course the tag division’s going down the diarrhea dumps. All that fuckin’ work for shit. Good job, guys, fuckin’ A.” There was a mild slur to their words, though it was hard to tell as they spoke through gritted teeth. The bottle was raised to their lips, sucked dry of its last dregs, and dropped to the side of the couch, clinking against two of its previously drained fellows. John looked up from Sue Monk Kidd’s The Invention of Wings. He adjusted his reading glasses on the bridge of his nose. “You could always change the channel.” Mike blinked as if they seriously had not considered this as a possibility, eyes flicking to the remote on the end table, staring at it bemusedly before picking it up and starting to idly run through the channels, little split-second mismatched bits of programming fusing themselves into an incomprehensible chain with every flick of their finger, before finally sighing hotly and clicking the TV off altogether. “Or turn it off,” he turned the page. “...don’t it piss you off at all, though? We busted our fucking nuts to make something outta nothing, and the moment we leave it’s just as big a pile of shit as before. It ain’t just pointless, it’s fuckin’ disrespect.” “Yes. We said as much,” John didn’t look up. He agreed to the joint statement but he also thought it gave people false hope as if the two were coming back to right a wrong. But that is where the business decision came in. He had concluded that they would never be featured and that tag team wrestling would never be taken seriously. It would always be considered an afterthought or a contingency plan. Jealousy was an ugly emotion to confront but it felt justified here. So he let go. Something tugged at the corner of his mind and it was an obvious declaration at this point, “Why not go somewhere else?” If they’d still been holding their beer bottle they would have dropped it, and legit surprise seeped its way into their somewhat drunken expression.“Are you serious? I mean… I mean I thought you were done, outside the one-offs here an’ there. All that stuff you said about not knowing how much you had left in the tank an’ not wanting to push it.” He remembered as such. Part of him enjoyed playing local celebrity. There wasn’t a day out there when someone didn’t ask about about NSFW. About reclaiming what was theirs. They shared his partner’s drunken sentiments. John marked his place and set the book aside, “You’re right. I don’t know what I have left. But I believe that leaving this unsettled could cause issues.” As if in a moment of sudden clarity, Mike glanced briefly down at the trio of empty bottles, and thought about the few others dropped into the recycle bin at various points in the day. Giving a soft sigh, they looked down at their hands, teeth nipping at their lower lip, “If it’s just because of me I don’t wanna do it. Look, I’m sorry. I’ve really been trying and maybe I ain’t being altogether fair. But I said I’d deal and I’ve been doing my best. It’ll come in time, I just don’t...” They swallowed, sighed. Looked up almost sorrowfully. “...don’t want you to do something you really don’t want to just cuz I’m being an ass who can’t cope like a normal person.” John leaned back in the recliner, “No, that’s not it. I wouldn’t still be training. But beating on kids fresh out of Race’s school at the fairgrounds is starting to lose its appeal. One of them asked for your autograph right before you broke his nose.” “His nose oughtn’a been in the way of my fist. Learn to dodge, kid, fuck,” Mike laughed, the peal fading off into a sigh, albeit a lighter one than before. “Alright. So if this is something you really want- and you know I’m on board- then where do we go? I mean we’ve been getting offers from everywhere from Atlanta to fuckin’ Zanesville, and I… heh. I may have been holding onto ‘em in case you changed your mind.” “I’ve seen those,” John didn’t mean to be dismissive of Mike’s excitement but he had seen those offers. Middling gigs that were of little substance. Although, a few weeks ago, they’d been walking out of the aforementioned fairgrounds. Someone, he couldn’t remember their face, handed him a flyer. The slip of paper had a curious logo on it. An inverted triangle made up of three letters. For some reason, John kept it. He retrieved it from his wallet and handed it to Mike, “But what about something more international?” They took the piece of paper, gave it a once over, and smiled broadly, “Valor Pro, huh? Shit, some of the best times we’ve had’ve been travelling the world. Let’s do it.” With business conducted, the newly minted Valor Pro Wrestling tag team looked ahead to a major challenge. Church and McGuire had talked a big game and their new employer clearly took notice. These sort of sessions between the two were usually private. But something about this place compelled them to be more intimate with their discourse. And so propped up on a kickstand, Mike’s phone filmed their discussion. Start of next month, NSFW would make their official debut in the capital city of Morocco. There was a palpable excitement between the two as they wouldn’t be hand held through a corporate approved set of appearances. Their promotion would be their own. That rush dissipated as the pair sat at the dining room table with an open manilla folder between them. Bio sheets of their opponents, scribbled with John’s notes and Mike’s doodles. Berlin’s mustache suddenly had roguish curls while Brenna had devil horns and a forked tongue. Mike gestured to the former. “If you want me to be honest, an’ I know you do? I got no clue what to make of this guy. I mean, Brenna we know, kinda. She’s dangerous as shit and just as unpredictable. This Berlin dude, though… damn. Might’s well be an alien landscape.” Mike looked up to their partner- he’d always had an uncanny gift of insight that would definitely serve them well here. “What do you think?” “It’s what we wanted.” “I know that. New places, new people. I’m excited. But what I mean is, I can’t get a bead on Berlin and you’re really fuckin’ good at reading people. You see something I’m missing?” “He seems nice.” Mike sighed, shaking their head with a mild chuckle. That, it seemed, was that. “Yep. He sure does. So… how do we approach this, you think?” John looked at the still photos of Brenna and Berlin. Notably, the warm expression lent towards Berlin after coming up short just moments prior. His fingers touched them briefly, “That’s new. Well, not new,” he shrugged and closed the folder. For a brief moment, John’s eyes steeled, “We aren’t here to make friends. These two are in our way.” “Good eye. But I’m wondering if the same kinda tactics people tend t’ try and use on us- the separate and destroy shit- would be an advantage or an invitation to get ourselves killed. Unless…” Mike’s eyes found their partner’s, a devious grin flicking over their lips. “...the one on the ‘destroy’ end is the one most likely to get all murderous-like.” “It’s a matter of not hesitating,” John answered, “because she won’t. Our association with her has always been at arm’s length and her career aspirations have always been unclear. And while these two have a history, she’s shown that walking out on her partner isn’t out of the realm of possibility.” “Yeah, just because she’s flirty as shit with me doesn’t mean she won’t beat me up. Nothing personal, but it is what it is,” Mike shrugged, “For that point, Berlin doesn’t seem like the type who likes being tied down to anything either. Talks a lot about nomadic wandering and shit.” “And so why is he here?” John’s question was rhetorical. Mike picked up on the flicker of sarcasm but not many others would, “This is our chance to reestablish just who we are. The premier tag team in this sport. And what I’ve seen out of Berlin thus far is a kind of lip service towards this business. Coasting on an undeniable level of ability. Thus far, I get the inclination that he thought he had it easy coming up on his last time. And for the first time, he faced some real adversity and the result was…” He tapped his fingers on the table three times in an all too familiar cadence. “And Mike, believe me, we’re a brick wall.” Mike nodded, beaming, “They’re good, but they’re still two guys. We’re a team. We’ll show ‘em what the difference is. This ain’t a hot date, this is a Number One Contendership shot for those gorgeous-ass Chimera Tag Team belts. They belong to a team who eats, sleeps, and breathes tagging, not just another combo of two people tagging cuz it’s convenient. I mean, fuck. It’s not like being a couple alone makes for a good t--” They stopped themselves. “And that, I think…” They looked to the camera, their palm hitting the lens in an abrupt cut to black.