#dubious time placement

[hughesmybaby]

guilty as sin (18+)

bodyguard!quinn hughes x rich!female reader

summary: you were assigned a bodyguard against your will by your billionaire father, but who knew he would be that tempting, that tantalizing? it shouldn't go this far but can you resist?

word count: 1.1k words

requests/asks

a/n: i haven't written in a while, and wanted to get back into blurbs/writing something a little everyday. this is also my first quinn fanfic and won't be my last! please show your support how you can, any requests, comments, suggestions keeps writers like me writing. hope you can enjoy it! apologies if i'm rather rusty on my smut game, but i'll polish it up over time <3 lmk if you'd like to be added to my tag list

(dividers by @jiyascepter)

Tw: masturbation, (dubious) power dynamics, oral (f receiving), p in v penetration

"I'm your bodyguard. It's in the job description to protect you at all times."

"Well, could you at least 'protect' me from over there?"

This shouldn’t be happening. You shouldn’t even have a bodyguard were it not for your overprotective billionaire father paranoid someone would try to hurt you.

Quinn Hughes waltzes into your life with all mystery, emotions guarded behind his guarded, melancholic demeanour. Your father only wanted the best for you so he was a stand out and highly recommended at a step price to the security agency. So enigmatic he had no trace on the internet when you looked him up.

So when you would show up from a long day with purple and blue blotches around your neck, rope marks around your thighs and wrists, your father grew worried that Quinn was not the man for the job, but you assured him no one else would do the job.

In your apartment, you’d drag him by the collar with your perfectly manicured fingers, and feel his warm lips around yours. His strong grip, the musk of the tobacco perfume you gifted him, the scruff of his beard against your cheeks.

"We can’t do this." He pulls away exasperatedly, but the longing in his eyes would not lie even if his words betrayed him.

“Why not?”

“Because this is not right. I’m supposed to protect you-”

“You’re protecting me the best way you can now, by being here for me.”

You take a deep breath, before grabbing him by the chin so his eyes meet yours.

“Do you trust me, Quinn?”

“Of course.”

“I want this to work. I want us to be together. Don’t you want that too?”

“Yes, more than anything. Even if you’re the last person I should want.”

Quinn closes his eyes as he kisses you hungrily, starved, depraved - nothing like the proper, professional bodyguard and protector he is to the rest of the world when he follows you like a shadow.

He sinks to his knees, fingernails digging into your bare thighs as he looks up at you with darkness and want.

“Let me please you. Don’t you want that?”

“Yes.” You said breathily, how could you resist when such an angel is on his knees so prettily for you, wanting to satisfy you. This is no angel between your legs, but a devil of your wildest dreams.

He hastily pulls up the hem of your dress, salivating at the darkening patch of your panties. Quinn’s fingers press against your clit, as you moaned at the sensation.

His nose presses against you clothed wetness, as he takes in your scent. He tugs your panties down your legs, tucking it into his pocket.

“What will you do with that?” You smirked mischievously, fingers threading between his unruly locks out from their gelled placement.

“You’ll find out.” Without missing a beat, he dives into your core, tongue and fingers messily plunging into your folds without mercy.

You groaned, flailing on your back on the bed behind you. Quinn follows you, grip around your thighs like a vice as he sucks and fingers you like a man starved.

You don’t care he’s supposed to be your bodyguard and lines should not be crossed. Those lines have long been crossed since he arrived at your home and introduced to you.

Not when simply looking at him gives you a jolt of electricity and make your heartbeat like a teenager again. When his rough calloused hands behind your back guides you as you walk, offering a hand when you step out of your bulletproof van.

Not when the slight bump of his nose has been the vision you have when the electric buzz of your toy was against your pussy while he stood outside stoic pretending he never heard a thing.

Your legs shake around his thighs as you see stars, but the vision of him looking up at you with your essence dripping down his nose, splattered around his cheekbones and along the scruff of his jaw and chin is more heavenly.

Quinn looks at you like you are so precious, delicate, and nothing like the depravity he showed you on your cunt. The taste of your own cum on his as he brings you in for a sweeping kiss makes you groan.

You fumble with the buttons of his crisp dress shirt, unbuttoning it without a care. You can buy more damn shirts if he wants. He pulls his arms away from the shirt, so his bare skin is revealed to you.

Your fingers brush against his toned torso and muscular arms, his biceps, forearms, memorizing every vein, crevice of his slightly tanned skin. You look at him with nothing but admiration, and he mirrors the same look, hunger simmering on the surface.

“May I?” Quinn whispers gently, hands ghosting against your clothed ribcage, around your waist,

You nod, and Quinn unzips you from behind, the expensive tweed shrugged off to the side. Only in your bra, you unclasped it and tossed it, so you could reveal yourself to him fully.

He unbuckles his dress pants, and pulls down his boxers so he could be as unclothed as you. Quinn takes a moment to savour the moment, hands hovering all over you.

“How do you want this?” He pleads breathily, patience barely hidden but not wanting to hurt or ruin you.

You lay back on the bed, elbows propped up by your pillows and your silky hair splayed out. Legs parted for him to see without holding back and he groaned.

“Like this.”

Quinn climbs over you, restraint gone as he pulls at your ankles closer to the edge of the bed. He pumps at his swollen, dripping cock, aroused from pleasing you earlier as it nestled between his legs.

“Tell me if it hurts, okay?”

“I promise, you won’t.”

He brushes his tip over your sweltering folds, and you whine at the sensitivity.

“Don’t tease.”

Quinn chuckles darkly at seeing you so pathetic, so desperate for him, for his cock. For him to fuck you so hard you cannot feel where he ends and where you begin. To add to the marks he’s added on his beautiful canvas that is your skin.

He enters you with ease, moaning at the tightness you wrap him around. He tightens his fists and forearms between your head, as he kisses you, suckling at your tongue, the insides of your cheek.

You moan, crying out his name as he pummels into you, kissing your cervix, felt deep in your core. You would not trade this for the world, your illicit affairs, your hidden secrets, where positions, money, privileges and contracts meant nothing.

Quinn looks at you like no one else matters, knows your body better than you known your own, when his cock molds into your walls, when the feeling of his cum between your legs drips after you fucked or even when you walk in your office. No one will know. It's your secret with him, you against the world.

[davekat-sucks]

that john gender discourse ask make me remember when a friend wanted me to draw a trans guy john drawing for them because it was a headcanon and i got death threats for it because “june is canonically a trans woman”, mind you i knew nothing about homestuck at the time so i was confused and looked up to see if it was true before i could tell the requester about why they made me date a canon trans girl as a trans guy and it wasn’t true at all, the internet just told me from the research that i did was that june was a popular headcanon, so i feel the need to say to the people who think june is canon just because it’s popular is that popular headcanon in a fandom doesn’t = canon or means that it is canon

Seems like those people didn't even try to give a source that June Egbert was supposedly going to be canon because of a Toblerone wish SIX years ago and James Roach claiming it was planned all along in an AMA Dec 2023 (despite that other Toblerone wishes were granted that were near the same year that June wish was first requested). As well as the fact because it will happen in Beyond Canon, which is part of DUBIOUS CANON, it's not really like official canon canon like the base webcomic. Not only that, Andrew Hussie, who was the lead director of the HS2/Beyond Canon project, left the team and it was revealed the sequel was a money laundering scheme. Hussie was in debt to Viz Media so he hired freelance writers and artists and lied to them that they were making something new. People can also say because he's not running the sequel anymore, it can't really be considered as canon or official, even if it was passed down from him to someone else. The man should have stayed with what he started and see it through to the very end. People cling onto this thinking it is canon, when it isn't, even with the tease of a silhouette. It ain't official or real unless it's fully shown in the medium that it claims it will happen. Even then, because of the questionable history and background from Hussie himself and the placement of June's arrival, it's both kind of shitty to make it happen on something that was ran by a shitty person and are only doing it recently for the sake of pandering. It's not like a genuine love to have a trans representation or surprise that the transition was planned all along.

[belle--ofthebrawl]

Rating: E

Pairing: Swiss/Rain

Tags: Dubious Consent, Consensual Kink, Barebacking, Creampie, Sexual Coercion, Dirty Talk, Breeding Kink, they're matching each other's freak your honor, Trans Rain, Mean Swiss

Summary: Okay so basically Rain is girlfriend.

Oh, that's-” Rain whispers and winces as the character onscreen is torn into, blood and guts flying everywhere as the zombies began to feed. He hides his face in Swiss' shoulder, covering his ears as the harsh screams fade into quiet gurgles.

“Awful.” He mutters. “Disgusting.”

Swiss chuckles and tosses a piece of popcorn into his mouth, catching it neatly on his tongue. He’s got his arm wrapped around Rain as the water ghoul snuggles into him and he rubs comforting little circles into his skin. He’d done the classic yawn and stretch early on, laying the groundwork for how he hoped it would go. Rain hadn't shaken him off, which was a good sign. And the gore on screen only made the poor little thing shiver and scootch closer to Swiss.

“Cold?” He asks, like he hasn't set the AC to blast frigid air over the poor ghoul's skin, breaking it out into goosebumps that left him curling up more and more because oops the blankets are all in the wash. His eyes linger on the shape his nipples make as they stiffen up into peaks under his shirt. A far more interesting thing to watch than the shitty B-movie playing out on the screen in front of him.

“A little.” Rain says with a delicate wrinkle of his nose. Swiss chuckles and momentarily sacrifices his arm placement to shrug off his hoodie and hand it over; Rain pulls it over his thin top gratefully, taking away Swiss’ top tier view of his tits but it's a willing loss in the long game he's playing here. “Thank you.”

“Anything for my Rainy baby.” Swiss says fondly, nudging him with an elbow and Rain purrs, snuggling up close.

They fall silent as the girl on screen walks down a hallway. Rain’s tense, cringing already. Almost… Swiss thinks, shifting into position. Rain won't have to worry about the rest of the film if Swiss pulls this move off. He shifts as subtly as he can, timing it with the little jump-scare that's a creaking floorboard. The girl hesitates, sweat dripping down her temple. Her fingers skate across the peeling paint of the door. Swiss does the same along Rain's arm, ostensibly to comfort him but it puts Swiss' hand right on the water ghoul's shoulder in a predatory grip.

Rain's breath hitches as she pushes open the door with a long whine of the rusty hinges to reveal an empty room. It's so cute how his Rainy mimics her relief; a little smile, a little chuckle at their own fear.

A step in the room.

Two.

She's by the bed now, and-

The zombie underneath strikes, lashing out with withered arms to drag her screaming to her bloody fate beneath and-

At the exact same moment, Swiss moves; bringing his arm around Rain's neck in a headlock as he cackles and drags the both of them off the couch, Rain kicking and screaming in fear the whole time and-

“You jerk!” Rain spits when Swiss lets him loose. Through his laughter, Swiss feels the gentle baps of Rain's irritation wherever the water ghoul can reach.

“Rainy, baby-” he gasps, but the assault continues, Rain getting up on his knees to whack him with the long sleeves of his own sweatshirt and a cute little pout. “Sugar-pie, honey-bunch-!”

“Oh, don't you dare!”

“You know that I love you!” He croons, opening his arms wide and with the assistance of his own long legs, bullies Rain right into his embrace, peppering him with kisses. “Just can't help myself, whenever I'm around you.”

Rain receives his affection with a flat face and no reaction, crossing his arms and making unhappy little noises until Swiss manages to heave them both up back on the couch. Rain flops over on his back, still not looking at him. Swiss’ tail wags happily as he settles his body weight on top of him, placing a gentle kiss on his cheek as he brackets his arms around him.

“I said I just can't help myself…” he finishes, flicking the tip of his nose. “Whenever I'm around you.” Rain is not amused if the scowl on his face is anything to go by. Swiss kisses that unhappy curve of his lips, brushing a stray curl off Rain's cheek. “You're cute when you scream.” He says softly.

“I'm always cute.” Rain corrects acidly, purposefully avoiding eye contact. Swiss chuckles, nips at his lower lip and kisses him. Sweet and chaste at first but when Rain's mouth opens to sigh, he takes the chance and licks inside in the way he knows makes his Rainy baby's tummy swoop. Fingers tangle in his soft curls, run down his neck to feel the race of his pulse and soon he's kissing Swiss back. Loops his arms around Swiss' neck and hooks a leg around his waist.

It doesn't take much more than that to get his cock to fatten up in his sweats. He's got his pretty little water ghoul gasping and arching into his touch, wearing his sweatshirt and murmuring his name. It'd make a saint go bad and Swiss is no holy idol on a pedestal. His head tips back as he starts a slow grind, right into the meeting of Rain's thighs and the softness of his folds under his leggings. Swiss doesn't think he's wearing underwear and the thought makes him leak.

“You can't be serious.” Rain huffs in disbelief, but rocks his hips up in a heavy counter rhythm to make each crush of their bodies feel that much better. “Someone just died on the TV.”

“Ain't watchin’ the TV.” Swiss chides, gripping Rain's waist to guide him, starting a thrusting pace they're both intimately familiar with. “M watchin’ you .” He pets over the fabric, finds the shape of his labia and nudges them apart so he can rub the dark head of his cock up and down his parted lower lips as Swiss covers the protests made by the upper pair. He knows which one is telling the truth about what Rain wants. This one is drooling, soaking a little patch into his leggings already. He pushes to test the heft of his cock against the weave of the leggings, rewarded with the bump of Rain's clit and lower, the way his hole winking on the other side, trying to entice his cock in. Heedless of the barrier in place, it wants him in, bad. Rain moans, deep and pleasured as Swiss kisses his neck but as the humping grows more frantic, so does Rain. Rolling his head around, wiggling his hips. Batting at Swiss as he wheezes, looking tense.

“My Rainy gonna cum already?” Swiss asks with a teasing lilt. “Just from this? I'm not even inside you yet baby, can’t you wait til I am?”

“N- oh !” He squeaks, cheeks flushed and eyes glazed over. “Swiss, we can't!”

“We both want to.” Swiss says. He can already picture the indents in his soft skin that the elastic waistband of the leggings always leave. Thinks about how he's gonna mark Rain up worse than that with bruises that'll take ages to fade. “Lemme in beautiful, lemme make us feel good.”

“There's no…” Rain hesitates. Still so shy after how long they've been together. “Swiss, you know I can't, not without protection.”

“I'll pull out, babe. Promise.” He punctuates the statement with a sneaky hand up the sweatshirt, cupping his breast and thumbing over a nipple. Rain’s hesitation doesn’t do anything to kill his libido; if anything, his cock only flexes extra hard in his sweats.

“Yeah, right.” Rain scoffs, which is an insult to the work Swiss is trying to do here. He'll worm his way in though, of that he has no doubt. He knows how much Rain likes to fuss for special attention. It might as well be foreplay to him at this point.

“Can't you be happy with a handjob?” Rain pleads when Swiss rucks his sweatshirt up, showing off his pretty tits and tickles his tummy just above the waistband. Swiss hums a negative, shaking his head. Rain's getting wetter and wetter with each dirty slide of their bodies and Swiss isn't going to settle for a dry handy.

“My tits,” he offers next, cupping then invitingly, the soft flesh spilling over his fingers and while it's more tempting it's still not what Swiss wants. He shoves his hand down Rain's leggings, circles his slippery clit with a cruel and loving touch. Rain whimpers and arches into it. Swiss plants his face in Rain’s soft chest, purring as he rubbed back and forth over his cleavage.

“My mouth?” He drags Swiss’ head up by the horns so they can kiss and Rain can show off how clever he is with his tongue. When they pull apart, Rain looks desperate. Swiss blinks at him, slow and sleepy, wide grin spreading over his face as he shakes his head. “It’s the same thing Swiss, just let me suck you off.” Rain pleads when he realizes how screwed he is. “You can cum on my face if you want.” The thought makes his stomach curl with lust, imagining ropes of his pearly cum streaking Rain’s pretty face. He hates it; which is why Swiss loves it.

“Ah, but then I couldn't kiss you when I cum.” He says sweetly, dipping lower to slide two fingers in, nice and easy. The leggings practically come down of their own accord between Swiss trying for a better, less ache-inducing angle and Rain's struggle to try to get away. “I know that's your favorite part.” His fingers curl strategically, hitting Rain's favorite spot and making the water ghoul swear, rolling his hips down into it. He’s gotta make it good for his Rainy too, what kind of boyfriend would he be otherwise? “Plus, I know you wanna cum too. I know my princess is never happy with just fingers.”

He picks up the pace, drawing out lewd, wet noises as Swiss fingerfucks him. Rain writhes, riding his hand like a seasoned whore, body betraying his mind. This is Swiss’ favorite part. Sometimes he thinks about keeping Rain like this forever. Just aware enough to deny it, but so well-kept, well-fucked enough that Swiss could slip in anytime he wanted. Maybe loan his holes out to the others if he felt generous enough.

“I can cum like this, Swiss, just let me blow you-”

“Oh, I know you can…” Swiss tells him. “Which is why I won’t let you.”

His fingers stop. Rain hisses, grinds down as he trembles. He’s so easy but Swiss can play him like a fiddle, drawing the note out until it’s just the faintest quiver in the air and Rain’s sagging as his pleasure slowly dwindles down despite his best efforts to reach his peak.

“Just the tip?” he asks cheekily and Rain cracks an eye open to scowl at him.

“ Hate you.” he whimpers.

“Love you.” Swiss croons. What he’d really love is to get his face planted between Rain’s sleek thighs, suck his little clit until he squirted all over the couch but now that he’s so close to his goal he can’t risk any interference. Next time, he thinks as he waits for Rain’s reluctant acquiescence.

“You have to pull out before you cum.” Rain tells him quietly, frowning with the internal conflict. He’s too pretty to be thinking so hard. Swiss vows to wipe all the distress off his Rainy baby’s face.

“Whatever you want me to do.” Swiss promises, all sweet, poisonous desire. Rain doesn't catch it, too busy shuffling his leggings the rest of the way off and he spreads his pretty thighs wide, fully on display. He glares somewhere off to the side as Swiss coos in admiration, taking his fingers out to pet at the soft, vulnerable skin, smearing his slick around until it shines.

Damn, Swiss really wants to eat him out now. But his cock hurts more than his tongue ever could and Rain has his eyes screwed shut like he can't bear the sight of Swiss' smug grin.

“Aw baby,” he croons, sliding up tight to Rain’s body. “Won't you let me see the look in those gorgeous eyes when I push in?” Rain cracks one eye open, baleful and suspicious. Swiss just grins, tugs down his waist and to let his fat cock spring free, smack at his pussy with the heavy weight of it.

“Does it feel hotter?” He breathes, smushing the blood-dark tip of it over Rain’s cunt, reveling in the way the little hole kisses and suckles, desperate to get him inside. “You’re so wet with nothing the way, sweetie…”

His mouth falls open with a quiet fuck as Swiss glides smoothly inside, groaning at the new feeling of Rain's body without a seal of rubber in place.

“Ooh, that's good. ” He praises, hitching deeper and deeper, inch by inch as Rain moans. “You like it? You like the feel of my bare cock?” Rain shakes his head but his cunt flexes so tight that Swiss nearly greys out at the pleasure of it.

“Oh shit, oh fuck-” Rain whines as Swiss bottoms out, voice breaking pathetically on the last syllable. “Please Swiss, please just,”

“Yeah babe.” He grunts, dragging back to see the way Rain’s slick gleams on his skin, hole already nice and creamy. Swiss can't wait to make it worse. He gets his big hands on the slender curves of Rain's waist, a perfect handhold to keep him in place as Swiss starts at a fast pace, bucking his hips in a sharp, staccato rhythm that nails the spot Rain likes best.

“So goddamn perfect.” He praises, digging his nails in, a little hurt to enhance the pleasure. Rain sings out a pretty song as Swiss fucks him right, blushing high on his elegant cheekbones, struggling to keep his eyes open, his tongue from lolling out. He's always so scared to act the slut he truly is but Swiss knows how to bring out the best in him. “Is this why you always make me wear condoms? Knew you’d like taking it raw too much?”

“Nuh-” Rain gasps as Swiss goes for his clit, the sensitive little bud turning Rain’s higher thought processes off with just a touch, a rub over the nerves. “No, Swiss please don't talk like that, please, I’m not…”

“You are ,” Swiss counters, jabbing in and holding deep, pressed so dangerously high into his body. For anyone else it would be uncomfortable but Rain rides the waves with a heady moan, hiding his face in the crook of his arm as Swiss circles his clit with the calloused pad of his finger. “But you're so scared to admit it, aren't you? Don't you know you're safe with me? Safe to be the dirty little cumslut you know you are.”

His legs are shaking, thighs jiggling as Swiss holds the pressure on his sweet spot, works his clit without mercy.

“You want it deep and raw, you want me to squirt right into your pussy.” He breathes, enthralled with the way Rain's tits look. He leans over, gives one rosy nipple a kiss before trailing up to his mouth. Rain pants and Swiss licks in, steals the air from his lungs and replaces it with more filth.

“Fill you up hot.” He continues, letting Rain feel the heat of his balls rest against his perineum. “So you can cum again to the way it feels dripping out.”

And then. He stops. Pulls away; from his sinful mouth, his plump clit and draws out, groaning at the sight of the creamy ring at the base of his cock. Rain panics, tries to urge Swiss close again with stupid, stuttered pleas; arms going around Swiss' shoulders to keep him where he's at, keep at least the tip inside and Swiss makes another deep noise at the way Rain's body tries to lure him back home.

“What are you doing,” Rain asks frantically, peppering his face with urgent little kisses. “Don't go, I’m so close, I need to cum so bad-”

“No.” Swiss says, firm despite the strain in his voice. “No baby, so’m I and if you cum, I'm not pulling out.”

Rain wails softly in despair, scooting closer to Swiss to kiss him so hard and clumsy they clack teeth. He's vibrating with need, mins gone in his desire to feel good and so lost to the way Swiss kisses him back that he doesn't notice the curve of the wicked smile even when it's right in front of him.

“Say you want it, baby.” Swiss murmurs as Rain cups his jawline in his cool palms, laying his lips to the corner of Swiss' mouth. “Say what you want and I’ll get back inside.”

“No…” Rain says, choked. “Don't make me.”

“Don't make you cum?” Swiss asks cheekily. “You're too spoiled for denial, and I'm just too whipped to say no, you know?”

He nuzzles at sweaty skin, kissing the faint pulse going wild at his temple. Let me cum inside , he mouths against it, regardless if Rain understands it or not.

“You can't ,” Rain begs, sounding like he's about to cry. “Don't cum in me, Swiss. What if I get pregnant?”

“It's not like I'll be able to knock you up again.” Swiss murmurs. “Not right away, at least.”

“Swiss!” Rain cries, batting at him and that's about as much as Swiss wants to deal with.

“You want it.” He growls, taking Rain by the shoulders, shoving him down into the couch. He looks up at Swiss with eyes that shine with tears, even as his legs fall whorishly open. “Your body wants it, stop letting your brain ruin it for you.”

He takes the plunge. Gives Rain his full length on the first slide back in and grins wildly at the squeal it earns him. His fingers find Rain’s clit again, taking up the rhythm from before and soon Rain can't even shake his head in denial anymore, just lets it fall as he moans in tormented delight, hands flying to cover his mouth.

“You’ll learn.” Swiss pants, staring him down. “You’ll lose the fear eventually. Or you can start liking anal, that won't get you pregnant. Best of both worlds.”

He punctuates the statement with a slap on the ass and Rain whimpers, tightens up that much more.

“I do like the idea of knocking you up though.” He goes in for a soft kiss, a bit of sweetness to balance out the rough treatment this time. “And I think you do too. Go on baby, show me how much you love me. Tell me how good I make you feel, yeah?”

He lovingly pries Rain’s hands away from his mouth so he can sing pretty again; high, girlish uh-uh-uh’s, indistinguishable from sobbing that blend together to to a thin cry as Rain freezes, body going stiff and cums, long and hard. Swiss doesn't let up in his clit, watching the way he goes from right to squirmy, jolting and wriggling to get away.

“That's it.” He soothes, “Oh, you love cumming on this bare dick, don't you baby? Get ready… it's got somethin’ real special to give you.”

Rain starts shaking his head again, planting at Swiss' chest to push him off but it's too late; his balls draw up tight, his cock flexes hard and he cums pressed right up against Rain’s cervix, shooting his load right where it counted the most.

“So good.” He moans, just to hear the noise of despair Rain makes as Swiss fills him up, ignoring his denials. “Never letting you put a condom on me again, baby.”

He doesn't pull out. Wants to keep it all inside, let Rain soak it all up and swim in his shame. The poor little thing is too fucked out to even cringe as Swiss collapses on top of him, sweaty skin to sweaty skin and they both float in the afterglow.

“I love anal.” Rain announces after a few moments, sounding out of breath. “Where did that come from.”

“Uh, my dick?” Swiss offers, rubbing his face over Rain's beautiful tits again. The water ghoul exhales and runs his long fingers through Swiss' curls, scratching at his scalp. He starts purring, happy that Rain is happy.

“I’ll allow it.” He says with exaggerated grace.

“Thank you.” Swiss says meekly, and they both snicker. Something wet writhes against the skin of his waist and Swiss props himself up to see his favorite thing in the world.

“Surprised it didn't come out to play earlier.” He remarks, teasing at the bud between Rain’s folds, now ever so slightly longer.

“I’ll admit it wasn't easy.” Rain murmurs as his tentacle pushes itself out of the sheath, almost shy. Swiss coos at it and lets the appendage coil around his fingers as Rain sighs. He rubs a thumb over the width of it, careful to avoid the tip, which is always more sensitive after Rain uses it as a clit.

“Hi beautiful.” Swiss says, giving it a friendly squeeze. “Daddy missed you.”

“Call yourself Daddy around me again and you’re dry for a month.” Rain threatens. There's no real bite to it, he's just being sassy. Swiss grins, eager to needle him some more.

“ Papa missed you so much.”

“Swiss, I swear to fucking Asmodeus-!”

[tinyyoruichi]

𝘿𝙚𝙘𝙤𝙧𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝘾𝙝𝙧𝙞𝙨𝙩𝙢𝙖𝙨 𝙩𝙧𝙚𝙚 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙊𝙣𝙚 𝙋𝙞𝙚𝙘𝙚 𝙢𝙚𝙣 | part.1

Featuring : Luffy, Zoro and Sanji

(No use of pronouns)

Summary : you decorate the Christmas tree with one of the monster trio.

Rosie’s rant : heyyy ! The Christmas event start with the monster trio decorating the Christmas tree (others one piece men will have their own scenario in the part.2). It’s the first time I write with no use of pronouns, so if you feel it’s too gendered, please tell me

Luffy grinned widely as you stood before a towering Christmas tree, ornaments scattered around like treasure waiting to be claimed. "This is gonna be awesome!" he declared, eyes gleaming with excitement. Without much finesse, he grabbed a handful of ornaments and started hanging them haphazardly.

You chuckled, "Luffy, be gentle with the decorations."

"Why? They're just gonna look cool no matter what!" Luffy retorted, slinging a string of lights around the tree, creating a chaotic yet festive glow.

You joined in, carefully placing ornaments in between Luffy's placements. "It's about making it look nice, not just cool."

Luffy scratched his head, a sheepish grin appearing. "Oh, I get it. But can I still put this Santa hat on the top?"

You laughed, nodding. "Of course, Luffy. It's your Christmas tree, after all."

Zoro grunted, eyeing the Christmas tree with a dubious expression. You handed him an ornament, "Come on, Zoro, it's not that hard. Just put it on a branch."

He raised an eyebrow but complied, dangling the ornament with minimal interest. "This is a waste of time. Swords need proper care, not trees."

You laughed, "It's called holiday spirit, Zoro."

"Whatever. Just don't expect me to go all out with this decorating nonsense." Despite his grumbling, Zoro couldn't hide a faint smirk as he carefully positioned an ornament.

You handed him a Santa hat. "Humor me, at least for today."

Zoro rolled his eyes but placed the hat atop his green hair, muttering, "If anyone asks, I did it for the food, not for the holiday crap."

Sanji, with a cigarette dangling from his lips, approached the Christmas tree. He cradled an ornament like a precious gem, inspecting it with a critical eye. "Only the finest decorations for this tree," he declared, a chivalrous demeanor in place.

You smiled, "You're treating this tree like royalty, Sanji."

"Of course. A gentleman must always provide the best, even for a tree," he replied, carefully placing the ornament on a branch. With meticulous precision, Sanji arranged each decoration, ensuring a harmonious display.

You handed him a string of lights. "Care to do the honors?"

Sanji grinned, taking the lights as if they were delicate flowers. "I'll make this tree shine as bright as your smile, my dear."

As the tree sparkled with elegance, he couldn't help but appreciate with you the festive ambiance.

Feel free to like or reblog :)

[pokebioblr]

How do man-made pokemon work? Like polygon and it's evolutions?

Since man-made pokemon vary drastically in their physiology and behaviour, I'm focusing on the given example, Porygon, in this post. Feel free to shoot an ask about any other ones you are interested in!

Introducing Porygon!

Porygon is an artificial AI program that's learned the biology need to reproduce and survive over time. In its original form, it's a series of code intended to run a program that aids in organizing and transferring pokemon. After interacting with thousands of pokemon and working with human beings, the AI learned to mimic emotions and share many similarities with organic pokemon.

Appearance + Life History

Usually, the data is offloaded into hard drives as a program back up. A data leak (from an unnamed pokemon center) resulted in this unique specimen infecting other electronics. The original low-poly form they take is because of its source code and placement PNG design. Now, with its newly gained sentience, it prefers this form.

Once the program spread to other devices, each porygon tries to assemble itself using old scraps until it decides the body is close enough to what it would like. This is fairly easy for an analytical and precise program.

Reproduction wise, porygon simply duplicates its base code (along with important learned data) and sends it into a newly built form.

Evolutions + Other Forms

Porygon2 can be evolved via an upgrade disc. This disc contains new code, which is uploaded into a Porygon's main body. The form of the physical body is made to be more aerodynamic akin to how many devices/programs we use day to day looks more polished as time goes on.

Porygon-Z can only be evolved from Porygon2 due to how the dubious disc is only compatible with its prior evolution. The extremities are attached via magnets, and can be replaced without too much damage to the body.

Pokemon are truly incredible creatures! I highly encourage everyone to learn more about them. Even artificial pokemon like Porygon have complex histories and fascinating behaviours!

[wisteriagoesvroom]

gax + corporate/law vibes + ‘The powerpoint was steadily taking over their relationship, something that Max was not willing to stand for.’

gax?? gax!!

power (you make some points): a gax ficlet

rated m, ~1.2k words now also readable on ao3

author babble:

bear in mind i wrote this before i knew more about the Gax Lore i.e. karting together, actually being nice to each other blablabla. you could also just retrofit the vibes and hopefully they still work. anyways!

will throw this up on ao3 when i’m not sitting bleary eyed in an airport

————

If there was one thing that Max Verstappen wouldn’t tolerate, it was George Russell having the monopoly on good PowerPoint presentations. Max had won all four years of debate in College, as well as the dubious title of “most radical deployment of Google Slides templates” at his MBA, and he was not about to be usurped by the other guy in his department who actually knew how to use an animate transition.

“You missed an indent there.” Max says, pointing at the monitor. Yellow and red lights wink at them from the outside, as if to say: you’re both in your mid-twenties, quit wasting it on a computer screen at 11pm on a Wednesday, maybe?

Max is not staring, very determined not to look at his teammate’s facial expression. But George is almost certainly rolling his eyes right now.

“Was coming back to that, alright?” George huffs back. Max is very professional most of the time. But something about how wound up George is, how insanely pedantic he is about everything from semicolons to coffee cup placement for the Directors to taking insanely detailed minutes that nobody except Max reads after the meetings – well. What is it that Nietschze once said? We hate in others what we most identify with about ourselves. Or was that from Twitter? Max does not really use Twitter except to look at Bloomberg News updates and cat videos, so he does not know. And anyway Nietzsche never made a six figure salary.

“It would just be easier if you would let me do it.” Max says.

“Fuck right off, mate.”

“Oh, wouldn’t you like me to.”

“Not now.”

“Just share the link to this. I’ll do it.”

“We agreed to take turns on this.”

“Yes, Russell. But sometimes, the rules are meant to be bent.”

George swivels his chair to Max, then. Fully attempts to pin him with his gaze, commencing an awkward stare-off that lasts way too many seconds and makes Max once again realise that George’s eyes remind him of the expensive fish tank he saw at the Partners’ sushi dinner once. Max doesn’t think those same fish were the ones they ended up eating. But he does remember that dinner because it was the one where the Partners had dangled the promise of a huge promotion if they could help carry the company merger across the line successfully. The problem is, there was only one spot.

George’s distracting aquatic orbitals aside, fortunately, Max (i) never backs down, and (ii) has been told that he has the dead-eyed emotional stare of a robot missing an empathy software upgrade sometimes.

And clearly, the powerpoint was steadily taking over their relationship, something that Max was not willing to stand for.

Max leans back in his chair, stance all mock-relaxed. “Do you want to be out of here before midnight, or not?”

“We’re expensing the Ubers either way, so it doesn’t make a difference to me, mate.”

Fine. If George is so hyperfocused on The Tasks that he’s forgotten the fun part of being Questionably Close Coworkers, so be it.

Max deploys the nuclear option.

He sticks his leg out, nudging the toe of his Pradas onto George’s slacks. And strokes his foot halfway up to a sensitive point on George’s thigh. Max may even flutter his lashes a little.

To his credit, George does not react. Merely swings his eyes like a lamp to Max’s face again. His hand does, however, goes still on the mouse.

“What exactly are you doing?”

“I don’t know.” Max feigns. He knows that George hates, more than anything, anyone getting dirt on his precious Ralph Laurens. But at least he has his attention now. “Was hoping we could move onto the more fun part of the typical evening activities. Maybe.”

“We shouldn’t be doing that again anyway.”

“George.”

“What?”

“That is not what you said the last, hm, fourteen times that we have done this, eh?”

“Who’s counting?”

“I thought you were the most careful of rule followers and data analysis, knapperd.”

George is a human being, but Max is almost certain the other man shakes himself like he’s preening right now.

“Well. It’s what the team likes me for, and it’s what I’ll keep doing.”

“Oh yes. Surely we must keep in mind the team. And the shareholders. They are very important.”

“Quite.”

“But should we tell them that you like it so much, George. When I do this.” Max says. Rising up, fully crowding George in, hands gripping the cool handles of the computer chair. Leaning in to nibble the side of George’s neck.

George swallows. Max watches his throat move.

Next, Max mouths the words onto the side of George’s jaw, stubble prickling his mouth. “And this.”

The click of the mouse continues steadily as Max moves his mouth to the shell of George’s ear. “And let’s not forget. This.”

Max tilts George’s face up fully, then. George’s face is flushed, eyes sparkling, all surprise at the sudden change of pace, but eager, too.

When Max seals his lips over George’s, George groans, and his hands shoot up to Max’s waist immediately. It doesn’t feel quite like winning a deal or a pitch does for Max, but the completion comes pretty damn close.

Max sweeps his tongue into George’s mouth. George opens willingly, like he always does. In the back of Max’s logical brain, a warning sign blares that the computer chair may not be able to support the weight of them both – because they spend a lot of time pretending they don’t work out together at the gym but Max knows exactly what George’s deadlift PB is and it’s pretty damn high for a scrawny looking dude.

And despite the keening protest of said chair, the two of them are both lost to it now. Max jams one knee between George’s legs, George nibbles hungrily at Max’s lower lip, Max thrusts his hips all needy, and maybe if Max is nice about it George might suck him off under the table, and–

Outlook chimes again.

“Blasted piece of shit.” George says, breaking away. His hands go still at Max’s waist. “Why we’re using G-Suite and Microsoft Office at the same time I will never know.”

George squeezes his eyes shut, as if making himself stop this is causing him physical pain. Maybe it’s that or the workflow incompatibility when George tries to move his custom Excel-Trello gantts into a third party API.

And Max won’t lie. He kind of likes it when George gets so irritated about these things. When he cares a bit too much. Because what is Max but exactly like that, too.

“Hazards of a merger, I guess. But without that, I would never have met you, no?”

George makes a noise like he knows what Max means. The other man straightens his shirt collar, and Max runs a hand through his hair. He’s been growing it out lately, because George had made a passing comment at the bathroom sink once about it looking good.

Sleeping with the person competing for the same Chief of Staff position is possibly the worst decision he could’ve made, and Max once dyed his hair platinum blonde. But, they’re stuck here together. Hell is a slightly more tolerable place when Satan’s right hand man looks this good. And knows his coffee order without asking.

Besides. Max is not bothered. He knows that the promotion is his. This is just a minor plot inconvenience.

Later, they will expense the uber back to George’s place, where Max will put his mouth on George’s arse, and give him a practical demonstration of the three different ways he’s learned to elicit pleasure from the male prostate.

George will whimper and whine the whole way through it, and after they’re both sated, they’ll both roll over to check their emails, barely concealing their smiles. They will pretend that what’s happening between them could be as clean as their zero-email inboxes. As if their connection is not violently seeping through containment.

All in the name of team bonding. For the firm. Yes.

(Or this is what they tell themselves, to maintain the illusion, anyway.)

[ccorthal]

okok obi and ani brotherdad au notes down below!!!!!!

obi was qui gon's foster son (long term placement, he was placed w qui at age 12), but was never adopted + distances himself from qui a bit after going to college,, @ 22 y/o, obi is in his senior year of college and gets an email/text/smthn from qui gon that he should come home after graduation to meet his (surprise!!!!!) brother. qui gon claims that anakin is his biological son (dubious) and him, shmi, + the baby are living together, and as much as obi wan is a little mad at all this and having a Certified Older Sibling Moment, he's pretty quickly endeared to ani.

i think that being present in anakin's life definitely does a lot to fix obi wan and qui gon's relationship (i just finished master and apprentice and i keep thinking about how when obi wan looks back on his time with qui gon, those years after the events of the book are the bestmost important. in this au, this period of time is the same way (,: ) but the summer after obi wan graduates with his phd, qui gon and shmi pass away in an accident. obi wan kinda leaps without looking and files for guardianship of anakin, so when obi wan starts his new job at the university he is also starting his years as a parent :) babyboy has a lot on his plate. at this point he's 27 and ani is 6

[gemharvest]

You don't deserve this.

Hiiiii I'm not reading over this. If anything comes off disjointed/ reads weird, chalk it up to Beef being out of it. Sorry for meanies-posting but this shit comes to me. Way too easily. I'm going to scare myself out of posting if I let this sit long enough to give it a proper reread so Yeah.

Intended to be closer to that one sketch comic I did, so this isn't current-times RGBFverse. Dubious timeline placement because I probably mixed up some things that would/ wouldn't happen around the vague time this is supposed to be.

Characters: Yourself (Hit Single/ Ochre's), Beef (Mine)

-----

Eyes opening, unfocussed. Head hurt. Disoriented. Head spinning with an uncomfortable feeling. Felt almost like his head was flooded with a dense fog.

Didn’t know where he was, couldn’t remember even falling asleep. Nerves waking up before the rest of him.

Where was he..?

Beat.

Heartbeat…

It took a few moments more for Beef to realize he was being held, a head resting atop his: Yourself’s. Slow heartbeat, familiar hoodie fabric. Warmth built that let Beef know he had been there for a bit now.

He couldn’t remember how he got there. Could hardly think at all. Had he even come here on his own..? It wasn’t often he came over. Still felt nervous, like YS would decide to go back on being his big brother at any moment.

Must’ve been sung to sleep, though it was weird. Hadn’t ever knocked out this hard to singing. Maybe…

Beef was vaguely aware his brother wasn’t human. An angel, he had let slip in a moment of weakness. Weakness he had caused, because it seemed that was all he was good at.

Oh, everything spun more as he thought about that. He still felt so bad about that.

Still… maybe that was it. That he had let some angelic magic slip into his singing. But… why?

Why waste that on him..?

So much activity in his head, while only still just waking up. The other’s embrace should be comforting. It usually was, but… He felt off. Felt guilty. He…

He didn’t belong here.

Didn’t belong, yet only froze. Didn’t push away. Like if he moved, reality would catch up to him and he’d be tossed away. Like trash, like he truly deserved.

Greedy, he must’ve been. He was, actually. Didn’t deserve this treatment, not with everything he had done to YS. Only giving back pain to someone who treated him with such kindness. And yet, there he was, soaking it up yet again. Taking it like it was his right, and not something he should have to earn.

It wasn’t right. Wasn’t fair to YS. He was an asshole, assholes like him didn’t deserve to be given kindness like this. He should just… leave.

But he couldn’t.

Selfish motherfucker…

“Hey, little man… You alright..?”

Beef swore he’d never felt his adrenaline spike as bad as that moment. Muscles tense, and his heart had never beat faster.

Of course he was awake. He usually was. Could probably feel Beef’s emotions sour even if he wasn’t.

God, he didn’t need to be another problem.

So he tried ignoring how he felt. Tried to force his mind into a state of numbness, so he could pretend everything was fine. Pretend he was okay so he could have a few more moments before YS finally realized what a waste it was to try and comfort him.

But that didn’t exactly work; his body shaking and eyes starting to wet. The more he tried not focusing, the worse it got.

God, no, not again. Didn’t want to be discarded again. He was being too much, he would always be too much, he-

Gently, the arms around him squeezed. Body wrapping around him to keep him close.

“It’s okay, you’re okay. You’ve had a rough day, no need to pretend you haven’t. You can stay here as long as you need.”

As if on queue, Beef broke out into a silent sob. Eyes blurring again but this time with tears.

He hadn’t the faintest idea what was going on. It was scary how out of it he felt. But it was like YS felt not only his emotions, but was reading his mind as well. Scared, so scared he was going to be pushed away.

But YS only held him closer. Spoke to him with a tenderness that still felt a bit foreign to Beef.

He shook as he drew in a ragged breath, breaking a little more as he continued to cry.

Through his storm of emotion, he wondered if he had been crying before he had fallen asleep, too. It would explain why his head hurt so much. God, he hated crying.

“S-Sorry…”

His voice was wobbly, weak… pathetic. This was stupid. He was stupid, adding on to others’ problems. Shouldn’t let this side show. He was just gonna-

“Don’t apologize. If you need to let it out, let it out. I’m here.”

Dizzy, he felt dizzy. Just crying as his brother held onto him. He was a difficult person to care about; a problem child, if you would. He was just eating up YS’s patience like this. Patience he hadn’t even earned in the first place.

Gentle humming hit Beef’s ears, a melody he recognized. His song. Something special, just for him. He didn’t feel that important, but…

Beef let himself focus on the melody. Anything was better than the storm in his own mind.

Maybe he didn’t feel important enough to deserve that kind of recognition, but he still accepted it. Let himself be lulled by YS’s voice and the sentiment behind it.

Soon enough, his tears slowed, and the ache that had accompanied them died down a bit.

God, he was tired.

Breathing slowing, he let his stinging eyes slip shut. Gentle pressure, contact that told him he wasn’t alone. He wouldn’t be alone. He could doze off again if he wanted…

Greedy. He was greedy, letting himself fall back asleep here. And yet, he still did. Dizziness slowed as he focussed on all the outside stimuli he was being given.

He could be thrown away so easily. YS didn’t have to entertain this, but he was. So Beef would be greedy, as long as it was being offered to him. Felt like it wouldn’t be long until it was taken away anyways. Might as well savor it now.

Still… he didn’t want to be ungrateful.

With the last ounce of strength he had before exhaustion claimed him again, Beef sighed out two words.

“Thank you…”

[tearlessrain]

Hello! Sorry to bother you, but I'm looking to make a pair of harpy legs for the sims 4. I have no experience in modding or modeling, but I'm going to start learning both soon. Sorry for all the exposition, I really was just wondering about any tips or even how you made your digitgrade legs and paws/hooves. They're beautiful, and even though I doubt I'll make anything close, getting some advice from a professional would be oh so very appreciated.

not a bother at all, though I would definitely not call myself a professional lol. I am some guy with a dubious workflow and a dream.

for basic blender stuff there are a ton of youtube tutorials that will be more useful than anything I could say, but if you're looking for advice on making unconventional leg shapes for ts4 in particular, my main advice would be to preserve the existing joints and work around them rather than fighting them. As long as the hips, knees, and ankle joints have basically the same placement as the vanilla mesh, it will make weight painting miles easier and keep everything looking nice during gameplay (even if you're more into screenshots and storytelling, poses are still made with the default mesh in mind and you'll have a lot more freedom to use them if your joints and weights are done thoughtfully).

second thing is do the uv-1 map. it sucks and it's tedious and I haven't really found a better way to do it than one stupid vertex at a time but you gotta. it will solve 90% of problems you might encounter with mystery distortions and split seams, and it will let you actually use weight sliders. similarly, I'd really recommend mimicking the vanilla mesh's topology as closely as you can to make this easier.

I'm planning to do a kind of video tutorial thing for how I make new feet for the digilegs just so people have it as a resource to make their own parts, so hopefully that might be helpful as well when it's done.

[ohthehypocrisy]

The Problem with Paradox Pokemon: A Primer (And other Probable Interpretations)

It's been a while since the story of Pokemon Scarlet and Violet had ended, and while we now know what was the hidden treasure of Area Zero, the Paradox Pokemon are still a big mystery. Like, are they really the forms of pokemon from an era beyond time? Or are they just the wild dreams born of a careless professor's obsession?

We'll most likely never know the real answer, so the best we can do is to put together all the information available to us and form a hypothesis. There are other theories abound about the true nature of Paradox Pokemon, but I won't be referring to them here, to keep my own tangent clean and distilled. You are welcome to seek them out if you disagree with my thesis, but I think one must consider all opinions first. Basically, you can believe what you want, but at the very least hear me out first.

Let's begin by debunking a common misconception about the Past Paradox Pokemon. These are the PokeDex entries for Scream Tail;

There are two key points to take away from these entries. The first is that nearly all the information regarding Paradox Pokemon is sourced from a paranormal magazine, the Occulture series to be specific. Now, the PokeDex itself is already a dubious source of information given how nonsensical it can be, but then you've got official entries sourced from a fanatical magazine that's been described as 'disingenuous' in-universe. The fact that players took the information at face value caused great misconceptions about Paradox Pokemon as a whole, such as the placement in prehistory of the ancient forms.

Yeah, a Jigglypuff from one billion years ago is one of the most dubious claims about Paradox Pokemon as a whole. Why? Because multicellular life didn't start forming on Earth at that time. Yes, the Jigglypuff species had to have come from somewhere, but certainly not 1 billion years ago. Given how close the similarities are to Jigglypuff, Scream Tail may have been around closer to several hundred million years ago, not a billion. I mean, it's evolution, in the literal sense, so of course most pokemon will have an identifiable ancestor in the past.

Speaking of which, since the Paradox Pokemon of the past come from a time where everything was still evolving, does that make the fossil pokemon paradoxes as well? Well, the short answer is yes, and no.

Yes, they are paradox pokemon in the sense that they've been brought to our time through scientific means, but the logistics make all the difference. For one, these fossil pokemon are species that have gone extinct, which is the key word here. They have contemporary families in the present day, like Aerodactyl and its fellow dragon kin, but there is no true Pterosaur in the modern age, so these fossil pokemon aren't true paradoxes for that reason. The other reason being that the method of retrieval is different, as fossil resurrection is not the same as being caught and taken through a time machine. There's a very important distinction between making a modern miracle out of a jurassic farce, and what was essentially casting a fishing line through a time portal.

Scream Tail, Flutter Mane, Sandy Shocks, they can all be considered fossil pokemon in a sense, but they definitely did not go extinct over time, for obvious reasons. Speaking of which, have you ever noticed how it is that a paradox version of Misdreavus exists but not that of Mismagius? Same goes for Wigglytuff as well, where's Screech Tail or whatever?

Well, I bring up these three because the evolutionary contemporaries in Wigglytuff, Mismagius, and Magnezone are only a recent development in the power dynamic of these pokemon. What do I mean? I mean to say that the reason why we have paradox forms of Jigglypuff, Misdreavus, and Magneton is because evolution stones didn't exist back then. They were still hiding within the earth, buried deep within the mountains, out of reach of these pokemon until humans came around and decided to dig stuff up. And whaddya know, some of those cool rocks do cool things to some pokemon when they're used together, isn't that neat?

This also means that Past Paradox forms of pokemon like Nosepass, Murkrow, or even Eevee definitely exist, which is fun to think about.

One last thing to mention about Paradox Pokemon. Everyone seems to think that all of these ancient forms all come from the same time period, and that's not necessarily the truth. In real paleontology, organisms took over the world as multicellular beings starting in the Cambrian era. This period began at around 550 Million Years Ago (I told you the dex entry for Scream Tail was incredibly uncredible) and it was when life was still figuring things out. Then you've got the evolution of plants, fish, crabs, mollusks, before eventually they started coming out of the water and got the whole ball rolling. The era of the dinosaurs started 252 Million Years Ago in the Mesozoic Era, which is where some of the fossil pokemon hail from. The Ice Age, where elephants and rhinos were all covered in hair, started around 2 Million Years Ago and is called the Pleistocene.

I'm not a scientist, but I just wanted to put it into perspective how life has persisted on this planet in different forms for years on end, and that no two eras are alike, even the ones close to each other. It's ignorant to assume the Paradox Pokemon of the Past, or the Future I suppose, all came from a single period of time, but there isn't any reason to assume otherwise. Maybe that's the Paradox, that these creatures come from an ambiguous past or future, but there's no way to know for sure. I know for a fact that these ancient creatures didn't come from 1 billion years ago, as the Occulture magazine boldly claims.

For now, we have to assume that the Paradox Pokemon all come from the same walks of life in the past, as well as the future, if only for the fact that they all share identical abilities in Protosynthesis and Quark Drive. The Pokemon TCG seems to enjoy these shots of all the Paradox Pokemon coming together. And to be honest, I love it as well. There's no reason for these pictures to go as hard as they do.

(Tumblr won't let me post a higher quality version of these images here, so go to the Paradox Pokemon page on Bulbapedia if you want to use these as a banner or something.)

Now let's move on to the future Paradox Pokemon and clear up some more misconceptions about them. In nature and in machinery, every design decision is deliberate. But what happens when both come together and forge the future of the ecosystem? What crazy contraptions will be born of the manipulation of genes and behavior?

There are two takes to consider when it comes to predicting the future. The first being that nothing is set in stone, anything can happen, and the infinite possibilities of the future means that anything and everything can and will happen, given enough time, of course.

The second take is that the future is ours to decide, which is also true. What we do today is the foundation of tomorrow, and the day after that, and the day after that, ad nauseum until our natural lives come to an end. Of course, some things will continue to influence history long after we perish, like the accomplishments of those that came before us, such as the discovery of fire or agriculture.

I say all of this to give some credence to the Occulture magazine, despite how ridiculous it may be. Like, the idea that Iron Hands is an athlete revived through cybernetics, or that Iron Jugulis was born of a Hydreigon and a robot's love. I do not believe that any of these wild claims are legitimate in any way, but the nature of the future suggests that these are all possible, given enough time.

But to claim the Occulture magazine's content as proof is folly, since there is no way to prove any of it is real. And then you have the theory that Iron Bundle is actually a robot from the ancient past, which discredits the entire thing completely, since it and the other future Paradox Pokemon were all brought to the current timeline from a single possible future. Again, I also have no proof of that, but the fact that all future Paradox Pokemon share the same ability leads me to believe that they all come from a specific point in time in the future, one that can be predicted based on context clues.

Looking at these creatures, it's clear they were all 'designed' by a single person or entity, perhaps a company. They all share the same LED eye panels, coded lighting, and a chrome colored shiny alternate appearance. That leads me to propose the theory that the Paradox Pokemon of the future are man made creatures built in service of humanity and to restore life on earth, in an auxiliary form.

I already went on about how the future cannot be predicted, but developments in human technology do paint a clear picture for us. For one, space travel is a given, since the pokemon world can easily send a child into space to combat an alien asteroid.

Also time travel is a thing? I'm not talking about the machine in Area Zero, I mean the Link Cable system in Gen 2 where players can send pokemon back and forth to Gen 1, but the story canon takes place a few years later, so it's called time travel instead of straight up trading. Weird how we forget about this stuff...

I'm digressing. My point is, technology in the Pokemon World is far more advanced than our own. That is evident enough through the sheer existence of PokeBalls, the thing we use to catch and train Pokemon. It's not a matter of if but when humans in that world will reach an advanced enough state that they can actually make cybernetic pokemon like the Future Paradox forms.

The first step in technological mastery would usually be space travel, but cybernetic augmentation is sometimes a close second. Science fiction typically depicts an advanced neural network as a necessity to interface with the world wide web as it appears in the far-flung future. We know the pokemon are all cyberized, but would the people of the future become cybernetic as well? Anything goes when it comes to the future, but this advanced evolution of humans would probably be called Iron Hominid or something to that effect.

It wouldn't be without cause. Something would have to have happened that necessitated evolving into a cybernetic form necessary for survival. Perhaps a premature extinction event took place, taking on the form of a virulent disease, requiring iron bodies in order to preserve life on earth. Maybe an alien invasion dwindled the numbers of all life on earth, requiring a manual reboot of the ecosystem, so to speak, so humanity took to reinventing pokemon to fill the ecological niche opened up by the great war.

However it happened, all the iron pokemon we know about were built to replace what was lost. To that end, it can be assumed that, in the distant future of Iron Hominid, the future Paradox Pokemon we see in game are all extinct pokemon brought back to life through iron bodies, in the same way fossil pokemon are restored in the modern era. I mean, why not, right? They would have preserved the bones and data of all pokemon discovered, so they would be revived through cybernetic means in order to restore the ecosystem of the planet.

But these are humans we are talking about. It can never be just about doing the right thing. Most likely, the iron pokemon restored would be revived to work in service to humans, since life on earth is delicate enough to justify controlled groups of 'wild' iron pokemon. I'm sure there are truly free grottos of nature somewhere on the planet in the future, but we also have to assume the Iron Hominids have also mastered space flight, which means plenty of planets open for terraforming, so helpful pokemon born into servitude will most likely outnumber the population of 'unmodified' pokemon.

With that in mind, we can extrapolate a clear 'purpose' each of the future paradox pokemon were designed with. Iron Treads, the big wheel elephant, is most likely used for terraforming lands and plains. One Iron Treads by itself may not be able to do a whole lot, but if you needed a big plot of land tilled and ready for farming, you can't go wrong with a mini fleet of Iron Treads chewing up the ground for you.

Iron Bundle has the ability to pull together water from the atmosphere, and then serve it chilled with its built in cooling systems. It's also one of the more expressive iron pokemon, as its LED eyes are programmed beyond the bare minimum of expression. That leads me to believe it is made to dispense water when thirsty humans ask for it. It could also be used to pull in unclean water and purify it within its body, although I think another undiscovered iron pokemon would be better suited for that role.

Iron Hands may have been built to facilitate easier construction. I'd imagine those big magnetic hands easily capable of clipping large panels and lifting them into place to be bolted in. In contrast, Iron Thorns may have been built for demolition, since it was modeled after Tyranitar, a pokemon with a reputation for destruction.

The pokemon chosen for cybernetic revival are done so with a clear purpose in mind, I'd imagine. For instance, Iron Moth would be best suited for absorbing radiation and emitting it safely as UV rays in areas that receive little or no sunlight, since this was something Volcarona was thought to have done long ago. This would also make it a perfect fit for terraforming planets that have difficulty maintaining plant life for humans to farm with.

And then you have iron pokemon built for the personal need of humans. Iron Jugulis is clearly meant to be an aerial drone, keeping security of the airspace above governmental buildings. In contrast, Iron Valiant would work as personal security, as an unfeeling machine that will not stop until all perceived threats are eliminated, something similar to what Gardevoir or Gallade would have done in the past.

This is something fanartists of the future Paradox Pokemon seem to understand intrinsically, as the deliberate designs conform to the nature of the pokemon they're based off of. Though to be fair, I've seen some stellar fanart of Paradox Pokemon on both sides of the spectrum. I'd show you some, but I don't have permission to share the art, not that I've asked. Instead, you should go and have a looksee at all the wonderful designs here on Tumblr and on Twitter.

It's just a little sad that we might not ever see any more Paradox Pokemon after this generation. I mean, they were clearly pulled in from a time machine built by one crazy professor, so it's not likely we'll see more new Paradox Pokemon show up, for story reasons. And on that note, we might not even see the existing Paradox Pokemon again either, unless they were brought in through a glitchy Ultra Beast Wormhole or Hoopa's Hyperspace Hole or something.

But you know, we might be seeing Paradox Pokemon again in a different kind of game. You all know how Pokemon loves its spin-offs, so I'd imagine we'd see a few more pop up here and there.

What about a dedicated game all about Paradox Pokemon? I might be cooking something up about that, but you'll have to wait and see.

Thank you for reading this far. Sorry if I haven't posted in a while, but like I said, I'm cooking up something based on Paradox Pokemon. It's not quite ready yet, but I should have it done by next week. Until then, sit and stew and think about Paradox Pokemon, one of the best things to have come out of modern pokemon, collectively speaking.

Until next time.

[depressedhouseplant]

🔞 Just Fucking Write - Day 86 🔞

Prompt: Can be found here - Felix x Fem!Reader

Tags: Narrator is female, referenced relationship violence, cheating (the narrator is still with her boyfriend), referenced dubious consent however enthusiastic consent with Felix, fingering, semi-public sex act

A/N: This one is a little heavy emotionally so I won’t be offended if you skip it. Blame the eclipse (says the one with 0 Aries placements)

“Sorry I’m late,” I sat across from Felix at our usual table in the library. He noticed the marks on my wrists in spite of the multiple bracelets and watch I had on to cover them.

”Are we gonna talk about that?” He nodded toward my wrists.

”I’d rather not,” I replied, trying not to rub the already bruised and irritated skin.

”Did he hurt you?” The edge in Felix’s voice was unmistakable.

”I said I don’t want to talk about it,” I tried not to snap at him and failed.

”Well I do and I’m your best friend so Best Friend Code takes precedence,” he said.

“Best Friend Code?” I snorted.

”Yes, now tell me what happened,” he said, softer this time. “Please.”

”Fine, but can we do it somewhere a little more private?” I asked.

”If that’s what it takes,” Felix agreed. He slung on his backpack and then picked up mine, too. I followed him to the elevator and up to the fifth floor.

”No one comes up here,” he told me. “Discovered that when I was doing my work study assignment last semester.”

He led me to the back wall and sat down, our backpacks in front of him. I sat next to him and took off the jewelry covering the marks.

“What happened?” He asked, carefully taking my hand to examine the damaged skin.

”Bondage. Guess he was too cheap to get the fuzzy handcuffs,” I said.

”Did you agree to it?” I felt like he was staring into my soul when he looked at me. Of course he knew I was drunk. He knew everything. I never told him the worst parts, but he filled in the blanks pretty well on his own.

”As much as I could,” that seemed like a good enough answer.

”So that’s a no,” he said. I dropped my head between my knees and tried to not cry. I felt his hand in my hair, gently petting it. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make it worse.”

”I don’t know what to do. I want to leave him, but I’m afraid of what will happen if I do. That and I’d lose 90% of my friend group because they’re all dating his frat brothers,” I sniffed.

”I’m here. I’ve made new friends and I’m sure they’d be happy to have you. They’re kind of annoyed because I talk about you all the time, but they’ve never met you,” Felix told me. I looked up and wiped my eyes.

”You talk about me?” I asked.

”All the time. It’s also possible they think you don’t actually exist,” he smiled at me. “Don’t forget I’m fully capable of beating the shit out of someone if I want to. So he can try, but he’ll lose.”

”If I did break up with him, what would you do?” I ventured.

“This,” he put his hand on my cheek and kissed me. It was everything my boyfriend’s kisses weren’t - soft, gentle, needy without being aggressive. I kissed him back and before I knew what was happening, I was laid out on the floor with him on top of me, making out like it was the most natural thing in the world.

”I swear if we weren’t in public right now…” he began when he pulled back. His pupils were blown out with desire, his brown eyes nearly black as he looked down at me.

”What?” I asked, feeling a distinct wetness in my panties.

”I’d make love to you and show you how a boyfriend is supposed to treat his girlfriend,” he answered.

“I want you to,” I put my hand on his cheek. “I want you.”

”Can I touch you?” He asked.

”Of course,” I nodded. He grazed his hand under my shirt and over my stomach.

”I was thinking of somewhere a little more intimate,” he grinned.

”Weren’t you the one who just pointed out we’re in public?” I teased.

”Yes, but I think I can make you come without taking your pants off,” he replied.

”Oh really?” I raised an eyebrow. He rolled off me then sat up, patting his chest.

“Your back to my front and spread your legs,” he instructed. I sat up and did as he instructed. He wrapped one arm around my waist and slid his other hand down my torso, under my sweatpants, and into my panties. I felt safe like this even though we were in public. I felt safe in his hold.

”Damn, you’re wet,” he observed as his fingers started to explore my pussy.

”All for you,” I replied, leaning back to kiss him again. He teased my clit before sliding two long fingers into me. I couldn’t remember ever being this wet. My panties were containing it. For the moment.

”You’re welcome,” he breathed against my mouth as he massaged my walls, taking time to focus on the most sensitive spots. I squirmed in his grip and bit my lip to stay quiet.

“I can’t wait to be able to hear you,” he grazed his thumb over my clit, causing my hips to buck on their own. “You liked that?”

”Yes,” I whined.

”Good,” he smiled against my lips as I wrapped my arms around the back of his neck. I’d only ever fingered myself and I definitely didn’t do it this good. I felt my pussy start to flutter around his fingers.

”Please,” I whimpered.

”No need to ask, darling,” he said, pressing down on my clit and sending me over the edge. Fuck, this was probably the best orgasm I’d ever had. He didn’t stop until he was sure I was finished.

”Can I ask you something?” I said when I caught my breath.

”Anything,” he replied.

”Come with me to dump that asshole,” I requested, nuzzling into his cheek.

”Absolutely,” he agreed.

[thethirdromana]

I'm home alone on Saturday evening, what is there to do but go to Netflix and watch a truly appalling romcom? The cat's with me and I have alcohol: it's time for Irish Wish.

I normally rate Alexander Vlahos as an actor so I'm not quite sure what's happened here. His accent is to an actual Irish accent what this is to an elephant:

Picard's son from Picard is here! He's throwing fistfuls of charm at the dubious script and some of it is sticking.

Aww, Maddie is clumsy! What an unusual trait for a character in a romcom.

Fascinated by the choice to dress the mystical Irish fairy in a silk headscarf and a salwar kameez. I mean, it works, it's just... unexpected.

The puff sleeves are awful but I'm honestly impressed that Maddie has a wedding dress that she can run in.

Maybe I'm just failing at genre conventions for this kind of romcom but it feels like it would be helpful if Paul were even a tiny bit likeable, just to give some sense of why Maddie has feelings for him, and also to make it seem like maybe Emma wouldn't be getting such a raw deal out of it.

Is it just that he's loaded and has a massive house?

I've just realised that the house is supposed to be a short journey from Lough Tay, in County Wicklow, but Maddie flew into Knock Airport. And yes, I know that expecting film geography to make sense is a mug's game, but I'm also not sure why they would choose Knock Airport and not Dublin? Is this airport product placement?

Was it that they didn't think it would be plausible for Maddie to end up on a quaint old-fashioned bus from Dublin, but it was plausible that the same quaint old-fashioned bus would drive for three hours across most of Ireland to drop Maddie at the most plot-convenient location?

Oh, and now we're at the Cliffs of Moher. A six-hour round trip from Paul's house.

Let's not even get into the James Joyce thing.

James (not Joyce) tells Maddie that it would "hardly be difficult" to move her wedding to the other side of the country the weekend before it's due to take place. And the sentiment is sweet, but as someone who has organised a wedding, I have to say: it would, in fact, be difficult. Really quite difficult.

It's just not the most straightforward location to hold a wedding, you know?

I can't believe they're doing the classic "he teaches her how to shoot" scene, but with darts.

DARTS. The sexiest leisure activity.

And the height of romance is being weirdly judgmental about someone who you've known for a day.

Picard Junior is giving it socks, in fairness. I hope he gets to do this kind of thing in a better film than this at some point.

Also, Irish fairy lady is... St Brigid? Probably best not to dig into the theological implications of St Brigid-as-trickster-spirit.

The music after the Big Damn Kiss goes on just a tiny bit too long.

It is genuinely unclear to me whether Maddie intends to write a book on the Cliffs of Moher, as in about them, or physically on them. Feels like it could be either in this film.

Well, if nothing else, I hope Knock Airport's marketing team are pleased.

[offbeatcappuccino]

the impossible heir episodes 1-4 ramblings

Last week was an eventful one for Lee Jae Wook, Hong Su Zu, and Lee Jun-young's The Impossible Heir. Not only was last week the premiere of the series, but Dispatch, the popular Korean tabloid, released "earth-shattering" news that Lee Jae Wook was dating aespa's Karina. This garnered controversy and scrutiny towards the show and could have contributed to its ratings. However, as a self-professed Lee Jae Wook fan, I tuned in to watch the show last week regardless of the news. The Impossible Heir is arguable Lee Jae Wook's first "adult" show. Much of his prior work involved dramas that catered to the YA audience and for the first time we see him essaying a far more mature and morally dubious character as Han Tae Oh. While the show is marketed as having three leads, in my opinion, Tae Oh steals the show.

In the first episode, we are introduced to a teenage Han Tae Oh. The son of a murderer, for the sake of his and his mother's safety, he's forced by himself to a small town. Unlike his peers, he has no legal guardian and rents a rundown house in the village. Before the first day of school, he manages to provoke the ire of Kang In Ha, the illegitimate son of the Kang-Oh chaebol family. While the two boys are initially at odds with each other and even end up having a dramatic fight in the school lunchroom, the episode ends with an unlikely partnership- Tae Oh offering to use his intelligence to help In Ha achieve the impossible- the opportunity to be the next heir of Kang Oh Group over his two legitimate half brothers.

Over the next three episodes, we see Tae Oh and In Ha grow up as college students and later employees at Kang Oh. During their college years, we see a blossoming friendship between the two as In Ha becomes Tae Oh's only companion during their time at Hankuk University. Alongside their internal scheming to take over Kang Oh, we see glimpses that their friendship is no different from any other peers. They have birthday meals, eat lunch together in the cafeteria, and drink late night beers from the convenience. In Ha constantly chides Tae Oh for working too many part time jobs, but remains the dutiful wealthy friend that is willing to book a tutoring gig for Tae Oh or drop him off at work to help him financially stay afloat. The dynamics between both men take a sharp turn with the introduction of Na Hye-Won, who both male leads end up falling for though she ultimately ends up dating In Ha, mainly because she views In Ha as her key to overcoming poverty and acquiring wealth and prestige.

Just as episode two ends, the show takes another five year time leap and both men are working for Kang Oh group. Hye-Won also becomes what appears to be a staff member for a political party. The three remain as co-conspirators in their efforts to take over Kang Oh Group. Of the three, perhaps the person who gets closest to the chairman, Kang Jun Mo, is Tae Oh, who ascends to the role of his personal secretary. Tae Oh becomes Jun Mo's greatest asset and trusted confidante. Through his role, he starts to move the game pieces that would create a clear path of succession for In Ha.

The weakest aspect of the The Impossible Heir 's writing has to be Na Hye Won's character arc. Nothing about her frankly makes any sense. During the second episode, we are introduced to Hye Won as both In Ha's and Tae Oh's classmate and Tae Oh's neighbor. While its obvious that Tae Oh may have developed feelings for Hye Won due to their chance encounters, In Ha's feelings arise out of nowhere- to the point that it almost feels like he only wants Hye Won because he wants to take a person Tae Oh cherishes from him. However, if this was the case, the intensity of love that In Ha develops for Hye Won makes no sense. Furthermore, its puzzling to see the two boys so readily accept a stranger as a partner in developing and implementing a plan they have spent years working on together. Exacerbating this poor placement of the female lead is her poor portrayal by Hong Su Zu. Hong Su Zu's acting has been widely criticized by the Korean audience since the airing of the second episode. While I could see others' complaints last week, it did not initially bother me as much. However, the poor acting has become glaringly apparent in this week's episodes. If Hye Won is supposed to be who she's written to be- a morally grey character who is willing to do whatever it takes, including playing with someone's feelings, to escape her present circumstances, I would expect her to be desperate, shrewd, cunning, manipulative, and charismatic. However, the version that is presented to us is so blasé, stoic, and mediocre. Hong Su Zu's expressions and delivery are extremely limited- it's hard to swallow the thought that she's supposed to be a crucial main character.

Conversely, Tae-Oh's arc is the strongest point in the writing. As audience members, we are gripped by the elusive question- what does Tae-Oh get from this partnership? Why is he fiercely loyal to In Ha? and Does he truly want the best for his friend or is he planning on throwing him under the bus? Lee Jae Wook excels in playing the ambitious yet guarded Tae Oh, who becomes the "catalyst" of the story. Without Tae Oh, there's no plot. While Hye Won is a disappointing female lead, I was surprised by the chemistry between Tae-Oh and Choi Hee Jin's Kang Huiju, the younger half sister of Kang In Ha. Huiju develops an obsessive never-ending one-sided crush on Tae Oh when he becomes her short-lived mathematics tutor. At first glance, it's easy to brush her off as a minor character, but the amount of screen time she receives on the show suggests otherwise and Choi Hee Jin excels in playing the "petulant spoiled brat who surprisingly may be the only person in her family with a conscience".

If Tae Oh is a volcano patiently waiting to erupt at the right time,Huiju is a raging forest fire traveling at 100 mph. Her love and desire for Tae Oh is all consuming and destructive- something she wholeheartedly embraces but Tae-Oh fears. When Huiju's spontaneity comes to a head with Tae Oh's restraint, we see an electrifying chemistry between the two and we see another dimension of Tae Oh. While he can be avoidant and harsh, he is also gentle, kind, and protective. Its this internal push and pull that makes their relationship worth exploring.

One of the highlights of the latest episode was when Huiji confronts Tae Oh in a parking garage adamantly professing that she will force her parents to agree to their marriage and that she "will protect" Tae-Oh. I found her confession interesting on many levels because so far, all of Tae-Oh's relationships are exploitative. The other characters including his closest friend In Ha are only concerned about what Tae Oh can do for them and this is the first time we see someone offering to do something for him with no reciprocity. It's unclear if Hui Ju is a red herring or someone who will grow to be an integral part of Tae-Oh's life. As a viewer, I have to say that this relationship is one of the main draws to the show and is something that the writers utilize appropriately.

Overall, Impossible Heir is a Malthusian and Machiavellian drama that wholeheartedly embraces the capitalistic jungle. It may not be a show that fans of prior Lee Jae Wook's dramas will love, but it still deserves to be given a chance.

Rating: ⭐️ ⭐️.75/5

[houseofdissension]

⸻  𐄁  𝐕𝐎𝐋𝐍𝐄𝐑-𝐃𝐎𝐖𝐍𝐄  𝐈𝐍𝐂.  //  𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐌  𝟎𝟗𝟗.𝐀

SUBJECT  INTAKE  FOR  DUAL-IDENTITY  REGISTRY FLOOR  OF  DISSENT  —  DISSENSION  INITIATIVE,  FLOOR  40  –  RESTRICTED All  data  collected  is  strictly  classified.  Retrieval  of  memory  post-submission  is  forbidden.

[  𝗩𝗢𝗟𝗡𝗘𝗥-𝗗𝗢𝗪𝗡𝗘  𝗜𝗡𝗖.  //  𝗗𝗜𝗦𝗦𝗘𝗡𝗦𝗜𝗢𝗡 𝗣𝗥𝗢𝗖𝗘𝗗𝗨𝗥𝗘 𝗙𝗢��𝗠  ]

╰──  LEWIS PULLMAN,  32,  CIS MAN,  HE/HIM  ]   ＞  𝙾𝙱𝚂𝙴𝚁𝚅𝙴𝙳   𝙰𝚂𝚂𝙴𝚃   𝙻𝙾𝙶:  The  individual  known  informally  as  [  JUDE EASTERLIN  ]  has  been  noted  for  presence  within  the  Downe’s  Hollow  parameters.  According  to  behavioral  estimates,  they  present  at  approximately  [  THIRTY TWO  ],  and  have  been  under  evaluation  for  [  TEN MONTHS  ].  During  scheduled  daylight  hours,  they  are  recorded  operating  in  the  role  of  [  DISSENSION EMPLOYEE  /  LEXICAL STABILITY TYPIST  ].  Community  observation  reports  suggest  notable  behavioral  markers:  prone  to  [  NEUROTICISM  ]  under  stress,  yet  reportedly  [  ASSIDUOUS  ]  in  collective  settings.  Volner-issued  residency  placement:  [  CORNELIUS CIRCLE / GUINEVERE LANES  ].  Echo  archetypes  detected  in  personality  patterns  include:  [  SURVIVAL THAT DEPENDS ON DISEMBOWELED IDENTITY, ON THE SACRIFICE OF INDIVIDUAL AUTHORITY AND CONFIDENCE IN DOMINANCE. THE ACHING PRICKLE OF SMOKE INHALATION THAT CONSTRICTS THE THROAT AND CRAWLS PRECARIOUSLY INTO THE TEAR GLANDS BEHIND THE EYES. NAUSEATING HUMILIATION, FESTERED INADEQUACY, CARDINAL DESIRES— UNFULFILLED— BURSTING FORTH IN RESIGNED, IMPOTENT TEARS— IN EMBARRASSED SOBBING AND GASPING TO NO ONE IN PARTICULAR, LIKE A DROWNING MAN WAVING HIS ARMS TO OVERHEAD CLOUDS  ].  𝚂𝚃𝙰𝚃𝚄𝚂:  under  continued  observation..  Decompression  tolerance  uncertain.  Reintegration  probability:  INCOMPLETE. Continue on to Dissension Form below:

╰──  𝗗𝗜𝗦𝗦𝗘𝗡𝗦𝗜𝗢𝗡  𝗜𝗗𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗜𝗧𝗬  𝗦𝗨𝗣𝗣𝗟𝗘𝗠𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗔𝗟  𝗣𝗥𝗢𝗙𝗜𝗟𝗘  —  𝗙𝗟𝗢𝗢𝗥  𝟰𝟬  𝗥𝗘𝗖𝗢𝗥𝗗𝗦. 

＞  INTERNAL  IDENTIFIER:   JUDE E.   ＞  DEPARTMENT  ASSIGNMENT:    MEMORY STABILIZATION TEAM ＞  TASK  UNDERSTANDING:   “I organize walls of text and give them all the novelty of updated standard logging of operating procedures… ‘SLOP’, if you will. I average about 130 WPM with 100% accuracy on a good day.”   ＞  LAST  PERFORMANCE  NOTE:   “Jude E. devotes meticulously thorough attention to detail in every task he performs. However, he often gets sidetracked on labor of dubious value, such as cleaning the underside of desk drawers, or wiping down the inside of the communal office paper shredder to get rid of 'particle residue'. Jude E. has not been reprimanded due to consistently staying ahead of production quota, but he should not be encouraged, as he seems to create his own ideas of personal incentives.”  ＞  CROSS-MEMORY  TRACE  DETECTED?:  NO  ＞  DREAM  REPORT  (  IF  ANY  ):    EMPLOYEE EXPERIENCES PERIODS OF ABSOLUTE SILENCE. HE CLAIMS THAT NO ONE TALKS TO HIM, OR PRODUCES SOUND WHEN THEY MOVE.  ＞  MOTIVATIONAL  SCORE:  HIGH 

𐄁  𝗩𝗢𝗟𝗡𝗘𝗥-𝗗𝗢𝗪𝗡𝗘  𝗜𝗡𝗖.  //  𝗣𝗢𝗦𝗧-𝗦𝗘𝗧𝗧𝗟𝗘𝗠𝗘𝗡𝗧  𝗢𝗡𝗕𝗢𝗔𝗥𝗗𝗜𝗡𝗚  𝗘𝗩𝗔𝗟𝗨𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡

FORM  82-D  |  RESIDENCY  JUSTIFICATION  INTAKE: Your  responses  are  recorded  under  Civic  Harmony  Protocol  6.1.  Please  answer  with  full  clarity  and  personal  accountability.  Ambiguity  may  result  in  further  observation.

1. At  the  time  of  your  Procedure,  you  were  given  the  opportunity  to  decline.  And  yet,  you  proceeded.  Why  did  you  choose  Dissension?

The fluorescent light murmurs to him— a quiet, buzzing chorus, like a swarm of tiny insects burrowing beneath his skin with evolution’s precision. It drones on during his sleeve pulling and eye darting. They want him to walk to some reason to all of this, to empty his bags, to sort and leave that; to take out each frayed thought and illuminate it. But as Jude considers the cost of alcohol, the trade of pills, the draw of smoke in his lungs— he finds that he already knows how to give every last thing away. He has done it a thousand times. The real cost, he knows, is long paid. His voice, when it comes, is strained— cracked from too many hours spent without another human ear to catch it. “I do anything for work. Construction. Auto repair. I’ve even worn one of those giant animal suits to hand out flyers. Whatever pays.” He pauses, eyes fixed on an invisible thread on the laminate table. “But I’ve burned through it all. I spent years addicted to anything I could afford. Whatever was cheapest.”  Jude swallows. He is not ripe for the picking— he is past it, he is rotting. “And now I’m here, clocking in to a job where I don’t even get to remember the work I do.” He looks up. His eyes are glassy, ashamed. “Anyway, the luxury of dignity…” His laughter is whispered, like a ghost hiding in another room, “... is far beyond my means. I Just—” a breath, “— I just need the money.” His gaze sinks under the meek weight of resignation, so low that no spark of pride left to shield can be found in the downcast crescent shapes, witnessed in the enervated and gradual droop of his shoulders, like a melting candle, and in the mumbled and humming tones his words take on. A wan smile clings to his soft and pallid face; the last beacon of levity, albeit crumbling, left behind in the collapse. 

2.  At  the  time  of  your  arrival,  what  were  you  running  from,  or  toward?

“Yeah, so, uh… It’s funny now— well, kind of funny— how fast things go wrong when you owe the wrong people. It starts small, you know?” Jude’s smile widens fast, brittle. As a reflex. He chuckles, sharp and too quick, like a match struck in the dark, hoping to light the story before the shadows close in. An echo thrown ahead of the fear. “I thought I was juggling it all, being clever. And then one day, I was face down in an alley with a guy telling me he was going to turn my kneecaps into dust if I even looked like I was thinking about running.” His voice thins to silence, and his smile shudders. Jude’s stare slips across the floor— lost, unmoored— as if the hush between his heartbeats can summon the taste of blood mixed with bile in his mouth.  “I think he called me “sweetheart” too, which, now that I think about it, is probably the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me. Anyway, that kind of motivates a guy.” And Jude ran. Full sprint. Half-packed bag, bus station at midnight, shaking so much he couldn’t hold his ticket straight. He still has that shake in his hands, but he hides it behind his sleeves, twisting them tight around his fists. “That was a year ago. I don’t talk about it much. It’s not really… much of a story.” He glances up at last, but the moment vanishes like breath on glass.

3.  Do  you  believe  you  chose  this  life,  or  were  chosen  for  it?

Jude’s fingers twitch once in his lap, and then again. He blinks, and for a moment, stares down at the floor as if the answer might be hiding in the polished reflections. But nothing arrives. No spark, no elegant unraveling of thought. He sits— a vessel unfilled in heavy silence. His hopes are small things now, shriveled and quiet. He is too empty to hold meaning, to consider choice like it’s fate, or fate like it’s choice. He shifts in his chair, the creak of it far too loud in the hush. He swallows. His mouth is dry. “I don’t know,” he says finally, his voice low, unsure if he should’ve spoken at all. A beat. Jude lifts his gaze, but only part way. His eyes flicker near the interviewer’s face without quite meeting it. The words feel like failure in his throat— thin and unpolished. He hates the sound of his voice, how final the admission seems. “I don’t know,” he repeats, softer this time. “Is that okay, that I don’t know?” Jude shrugs, an apologetic gesture. His shoulders fold like the edges of a newspaper. “Sorry,” he adds, voice almost cracking. The interviewer hasn’t moved. They’re just listening. Letting the silence stretch. Jude’s face grows hot, gaining the blushing tincture of embarrassment. He wants to be impressive, articulate, maybe even wise. But all he has are dumb answers. “I mean,” he says, trying again, “I could think of an answer. I could say something. But I’d be making it up. Is that—” he breaks off, then finds his voice again, shakier this time, “is that okay?” His words linger in the air, fragile things. He folds his hands to still them. There’s a tremble—not in his voice, not quite—but in the space between each breath. The interviewer doesn’t speak. Just watches.

4.  When  you  envision  the  person  you  used  to  be,  what  part  of  them  still  lingers  in  the  current  design?

There’s an ache building behind his eyes now— fatigue, maybe, or the slow unraveling of a mask he didn’t know he was wearing. He breathes out. It shakes. The question carries the sound of a reverberating bell, prompting him to wake up in his childhood bedroom, and harbor deep within its vague, imaginary space. He sits there, still as a photograph, as memory unfolds around him. He can see the low attic ceiling, narrow and dark. The door always closed. The curtains drawn. That sterile, acrid smell— too clean, so clean it feels wrong. It has never left him. Not really. It lives deep in his twisting guts, right next to the hunger and the quiet, constant pain. Jude doesn’t raise his head. His gaze stays on the table. “My mother believed in purity. Not metaphorically, not as some symbol of holiness to aspire to like all the others. No, she believed in it. She said God didn’t dwell on the unwashed, the gluttonous, the boisterous. The soul had to be scrubbed. To be pure, we had to be alone. We had to be silent.” There’s a tremble at the edge of his speech. He remembers his lessons.  Jude’s shoulders hunch deeper inward, minimizing the space he occupies. His usual emotions, his regular habits, his conversations with others— all are presented with an instinct to withdraw, to shrink. Presence, after all, is intrusion. “That was part of her religion. Pain was private. Holiness was earned in solitude. Repentance found in raw, burning skin.” Jude’s voice rises shakily from his lowered, hidden face. He feels his throat close up like it’s trying to protect him. “I ran away. I slept in alleys that smelled like piss and rot, under bridges that echoed with the groans of trucks and people trying not to cry.” He begged with his head down, not out of shame— shame came later— but because he couldn’t bear to see the disgust in people’s eyes. It’s one thing to be invisible. It’s another to be seen and pitied. “And it worked, for a while. But there’s a cost to vanishing, and to using. You don’t just lose the pain. You lose the parts of yourself that might’ve been worth saving.” There’s a hollowness he can’t name, even now. Sometimes, he wonders what part of him got scrubbed away for good. He was once clean, too clean, and he rejected it by finding every filthy thing and letting it touch his soul. Either way takes courage, either way wants him to become someone blank enough to survive. Something’s missing. Some softness, maybe. Or some part of him that once believed in safety. “Now, even clean, even housed, I feel… stained. Like I carry the scent of it with me, the rot I couldn’t wash off.” There’s tension in his posture even as he leans back and finally raises his chin. “But I eat now. Most days. I let my house be a little messy sometimes. I don’t own bleach. Can’t stand the stuff.” He doesn’t say that he still wakes up in the middle of the night, heart pounding, afraid that he’s been too loud in his sleep. Some part of him still believes that silence keeps him safe.

𝐖𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞  𝐭𝐨  𝐕𝐨𝐥𝐧𝐞𝐫-𝐃𝐨𝐰𝐧𝐞  𝐈𝐧𝐜.,  𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦  𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵  𝘪𝘴  𝘰𝘱𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘶𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘺  𝘢𝘯𝘥  𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘪𝘤𝘦  𝘳𝘦𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘴  𝘵𝘩𝘦  𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧.  𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳  𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦  𝘩𝘢𝘴  𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯  𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘦𝘥,  𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳  𝘱𝘰𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘢𝘭  𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘨𝘯𝘪𝘻𝘦𝘥.  𝘞𝘦  𝘢𝘳𝘦  𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦𝘥  𝘵𝘰  𝘣𝘦𝘨𝘪𝘯  𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴  𝘫𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘦𝘺  𝘵𝘰𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳.

𝗪𝗲’𝗿𝗲  𝗵𝗼𝗻𝗼𝗿𝗲𝗱  𝘁𝗼  𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲  𝘆𝗼𝘂  𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿  𝗼𝘂𝗿  𝗰𝗮𝗿𝗲. –  Compliance.  Continuity.  Purpose.

[bloggedanon]

TOY COMMISSIONS ARE OPEN. DM IF INTERESTED, OR IF YOU JUST WANT TO DONATE.

Alright, listen up, folks.

My hours have been reduced to nothing for months now on account of disabilities I'm trying to get treated for, I got a med bill I wasn't expectin' in the mail, and now I'm woefully far from bein' able to pay for my upcoming psychiatrist appointment, which I have to pay for by the 24th of this month. This one is really important because there's a strong probablility this one will be the one to prescribe me some meds that just might enable me to be able to acually take care of myself (read: actually function at all) for the first time in my life. I'm prolly gonna need like $300 to cover the appointment. I ain't askin' y'all to help me for free, however.

I can sew together little pillow monster things. They have zipper mouths and button eyes. They're hand-sewn, from a pet-free home.

This is my oldest (and smallest) example. about 7" wide and tall. The ones I'm proposing to sell will be about 9" wide and tall.

Here are the buttons and (9) zippers I have available for this endeavor. (Sorry about the lighting.) Note the loops on the zipper pulls for easier zipping.

Uhh, those are soda can pull tabs in the corner. Ignore that, I'm procrastinating on working on a project.

In terms of fabric, I have fleece and flannel of various colors. 'S all preshrunk in a washer and dryer, but I don't have a good way to showcase or store fabric other than shoving it all into one plastic bag. That aside, here's the flannel I have:

(Dark blue, light blue, teal, white, space [small amount], and scales [purple, blue, and green scales, small amount])

And here's the fleece:

(Purple, red, orange, and black [small amount])

Note how I have more of some colors in one material or another than in others. This means certain body surface colors may not be possible due to material limitations. I have a whole bunch of thread colors, and just an overall abundance of thread tho 👍

These are custom made to order, and the production is paid in advance. You can do custom colors (body, front vs back color, the color of the inside of the mouth, whether or not you want it to have a tongue, number / color of eyes) and you can POTENTIALLY do other customizations. (Want it to have a ridge on its back like a cartoon dinosaur? Want me to give it horns? Want me to try to figure out how tassles work? Want it to have floppy, doofy, cow-lookin' ears? [I recommend fleece for these kinds of additions, trust me on this one.]) Shape alterations mmmmaayyyyy be possible, but that's pretty dubious. Bear in mind that any customizations / additions will likely drive priduction time wayyy up, and there are things I might not be able to do.

Shipping will be paid seperately, and at the time of shipping. I can't really afford to cover shipping, but also I have no earthly idea how to calculate shipping. I have a tiny scale at home now that I can use to weigh the finished product, but that's about it. These are gonna have to be personally taken to the post office, which means a lot of walking. I dunno, we'll figure it out.

This is all being said and shown in the interest of maximum transparency with this stuff. You will recieve update images with progress on your little monster dude, and you're gonna have to give feedback on the button placements and angles before I sew 'em on so that way I know I've got the look you want on it.

Payments are done over Paypal.

Base price: $35 USD + shipping

Comm slots open: 9

Customizations and additions will add to the price, but the extent to which it happens is (sort of) negotiable. Most customizations are going to be (sort of) experimental on my end, and hand sewing takes forever, especially when you have "everything magically is really hard and takes too long" disease.

If I hit my goal, I'll stop accepting donations. If all 9 commission slots are taken, I will update this post with a good ol'-fashioned pinned reblog and close commissions AND donations. Note that I can only work on one pillow monster at a time, and that it's on a first-come-first-serve basis. If I'm working on one and you want to commission one, I'll let you know and ask if you wanna wait for it. You'll get a number (1-9) to signify whose order I need to do next.

In the meantime, I need to go pop out and sell some blood plasma, probably. 🤡

[schrodingers-water-wet]

I think Dream can be more morally complex. If that's too far he can at least be flawed.

So I already touched on this in my Dreamtale revamp post but I think Dream particularly had a ton of different directions he could have gone in. Particularly he could have been morally dubious or just flawed in a handful of ways.

Morally dubious: So Dream is probably used to being the center of attention from Dreamtale. He's turned a blind eye to his brothers suffering for his own convince or is so oblivious to the suffering of others he doesn't notice for a long, long time. He directly benefits from helping people as it gives him one more persons positive emotions to tap into. If you change his motivation even slightly towards the right he's sorta... Scary? I mean someone who can blind with you with positivity, that can make you inheritly trust them because you are ALWAYS happy around them. If he only helped for the attention and power it brought him. If you found out you trusted someone with every problem you had and told them every weakness only to discover they never cared. If he was to only help others for his own gain without even understanding their suffering (or ignoring it) he'd actually be a more psychological antagonist than most in the UTMV.

There are a few ways to make him flawed without going to that full extent though.

Peacekeeper to the extreme (closest to cannon): Dream never intervenes until it's too late and he's too naive for anyone's good. He believes every single lie he's told. He's easy to distract and trick.

Too convinced of his own moral placement: this one requires more morally complex implications to his actions but Dream being so sure he's in the right. Hurting someone and insisting he's the good guy because that's all he's ever been. Hearing someone question his actions and getting mad at them because he's GOOD. Good people can't do bad things.

Dreams morally superior but also everyone else is stuck in their place: this one's hardly based off of cannon. Still consider, Dream is the same as the idea above but he also thinks others are unredeemable. Hes good and Nightmares evil because he hurts people. Dust is evil, Killers evil, Errors evil. Motivation doesn't matter, you are evil or you are good and depending on which you are every one of your actions is that. So everything Dream does is good, and everything an evil person does is evil. This idea would have him growing into being more forgiving like he is in cannon and having character development into being actually good (mostly. He'd come to realize nothing's black and white not even him)

Just make him pushy: this one's the simplest. Make Dream act like everyone has to help everyone. Not in a save their life way but in a constantly supporting others whether you want to or not. Helping others before helping yourself because that's the only way to be a good person.

Don't do any of that just have him destroy himself: Dream doesn't have to be morally flawed to be flawed. Dream clearly had issues they just are rarely shown to eat at him or affect him in any meaningful way. So have him ignore him. Putting himself and his own well being onto the back burner until he snaps. Have him so focused on fixing everyone around him he never takes any time to help himself. For this one to work though there has to be a real outward show of it at some point. It has to start harming him and or the people he cares about in a meaningful way or it's hardly a flaw.

This post does not reflect Dreamtale cannon, it is advice for fanfic writers/fan comic creator. Dream belongs to Joku.