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hazbinsponsoredbyvee · 29 days ago

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My brain would not shut the fuck up for 2 seconds, so to satisfy it, have a compilation of out of context questions and shitty takes:

1. So I sold my soul to Alastor for jambalaya (would've done it for free frfr), what do i call you now? Sir? Boss? Daddy? AHEM, what do your souls even do? Will I just join the hotel? Cuz I'm fine with that.

2. Can Angel shoot webs out of his ass? (I don't know where the fuck this came from)

3. Husk, do you blink slowly at the people you trust and love? Cuz cats do that.

4. Charlie do you bleat like a goat?

5. Does Alastor taste like venison? Experience rut? Also, can you make different calls besides squeaks and bleats? Do your horns get stuck on shit? Ever broke Vox's screen with a 'love tap'? Also did you know there's a ship with you and your mom? That shit is vile

6. Do y'all know Lilith is just in heaven, drinking a slushie on the beach while y'all are out here suffering?

7. Luci what's your opinion on the other sins? (All of em)

8. Vox what your best 'Alastor got drunk and cuddly story?' Also did you ever convinced him to wear a dress? (I'm not talking about the bets, talking about you actually managing to convince him yourself, no strings attached, to wear a dress.) Is your dick a cable? Do you eat batteries? And are you aware of how creative your simps are? (ESPECIALLY ON PINTEREST ISTG PEOPLE ARE NOT WELL)

9. Vaggie, did you ever watch Encanto and notice that Mirabel sounds like you? Also, you're Spanish, right? (Yay, like me, matchy), what's your fave dish?

10. Val what was the fucking point of trying to drug Vox? Like? Even if it worked, Alastor would've fucked you up so hard your dick would come out of your mouth. Did you just think he'd be mad at Vox for getting fucking raped? Idiot.

11. Husk, did you ever perform in front of a crowd? Because if I'd have your voice, I'd never shut up.

12. Niffty, have you heard of Vox's employee, Baxter? He's like Sir. Pentios but a way better bad boy, about your height, and a mad scientist. Bet he could make experiments on your bugs and find new ways to kill em or sum.

13. Velvette, my fucking queen, on my knees for you, ugh, it's your voice or your personality, idk what, but I want it. Give it. I love u queen. What's your fave dress you ever made?

14. If Vox would be a princess, he'd be a greedy princess. I scouted the internet for anything, and after being reminded that El Dorado exists, I think the best I found is Chel. She's smart and greedy, and wants more gold. That's the best i found. Or just fuck it and you're Ariel but a shark. Now I have to draw that.

15. Angel did you discover you were gay back when you were alive or in hell? Also, how was it Italy? I plan on visiting and maybe going to a concert at it, cause the language sounds so fucking pretty and idk how to describe it, just beauty.

16. So, Alastor, is Niffty in a contract with you afterall, or did she just exist in your house one day and you just adopted her? Also, Charlie can now technically call you dad, cause your her mom's boyfriend, so maybe stepdad? Second dad?

17. Charlie girl, you did it! You fixed your mommy issues with your dad, your new mom, and your mom's boyfriend.

18. Hazbing hotel should be renamed issues hotel, cuz we got Daddy issues (Angel, Alastor, Husk I think?), Mommy issues (Charlie ((she kinda solved them)), Pentios maybe), parent issues (Husk ig, Vox, maybe velvette? Cuz if she was just 19 ((young kween, we stan u girl)), I imagine her parents sucked ((boo, tomato tomato))), uh, just straight up issues (Luci, Vaggie, I recon Val had a shitty life) and a shitton of trauma.

19. Alastor did you wear cattle shoes back when you were alive? Also, how is New Orleans? I think it looks really pretty and has a beautiful beautiful culture. Maybe if I have money, I'll visit! See where my fave serial killer murderer came from. Also, is French hard to learn? I'd like to give it a shot. Last thing: drop that lash care girllll, why do men have such pretty lashes? Scratch that, why are men like you so pretty?

20. Be gay, do crime, eat boys up, idk, peace ✌️

—a very sleep deprived bird anon

"Boss will do just fine. And you can do as you please - I'm not like some, who require their souls to tirelessly work for them. I'll call on you if I have need."

2. Can Angel shoot webs out of his ass? (I don't know where the fuck this came from)

"Uh, no."

3. Husk, do you blink slowly at the people you trust and love? Cuz cats do that.

"Not that I'm aware of."

4. Charlie do you bleat like a goat?

"Um, no, I'm... not a goat."

"I suppose my flavor profile might bear some similarities to venison, but I imagine I do taste rather different. I don't experience rut, I can make different sounds, and no, my horns do not get stuck - I can shrink them easily. I have broken Vox's screen while fighting and when he's attempted to wake me up, but I wouldn't qualify either as a 'love tap'. And I do wish you hadn't shared that."

6. Do y'all know Lilith is just in heaven, drinking a slushie on the beach while y'all are out here suffering?

"Yeah, you're not the first person to share that. But Charlie doesn't know, and I'm keeping it that way until I get more answers. It would crush her."

7. Luci what's your opinion on the other sins? (All of em)

"They're like family, and like most families, I get along with some more than others. Ozzie is definitely who I'm closest to, Bee's always fun, Lev's cool, Belphi's great, Satan and I butt heads sometimes, and Mammon... can admittedly get on my nerves."

"I'm not telling you a whole story when you asked so fucking much. No, I haven't gotten him in a dress outside of the bet. Do you have any idea how much he hates deviating from his look? And no, my dick is not a cable, and I don't eat batteries. But yes, of course my simps are very creative. Right, Mel?"

9. Vaggie, did you ever watch Encanto and notice that Mirabel sounds like you? Also, you're Spanish, right? (Yay, like me, matchy), what's your fave dish?

"I haven't noticed that, and um... as I've mentioned before, I don't really have any memories before joining Adam's army. I used to think I was Heavenborn, but I get these flashes, and... I think I might be from Central America? I don't know. I do love tamales, I know that."

"They weren't even together yet. Alastor wouldn't have even known anything happened, if you idiotas hadn't gotten involved. Voxxy just would have chosen to stay with me, and their little budding romance would have fizzled out as it should have."

11. Husk, did you ever perform in front of a crowd? Because if I'd have your voice, I'd never shut up.

"I mean, I used to be a stage magician, so... yeah."

"Ooooh, Vox, I want to meet Baxter!"

13. Velvette, my fucking queen, on my knees for you, ugh, it's your voice or your personality, idk what, but I want it. Give it. I love u queen. What's your fave dress you ever made?

"Everything I make is the best - how the fuck can I pick one favorite?"

"Haven't seen it, so I'll take your word for it."

"When I was alive, and uh... yeah, my family's Italian, but I'm from New York. Lived there my whole life. Neva' been to Italy."

"Niffty is my friend - of course I don't own her soul! And I was already a father-figure to Charlie, but I never seriously meant that she should call me dad."

17. Charlie girl, you did it! You fixed your mommy issues with your dad, your new mom, and your mom's boyfriend.

"Uh... I don't think that's how that works..."

"Fuck off, my dad was awesome."

"And for the last time, I don't have 'daddy issues'. My mother did just fine on her own."

"I did, and New Orleans is indeed beautiful. I strongly recommend a visit! And I must admit, I don't speak fluent French. I can speak some Creole French that I picked up throughout my life. It was never something I studied, though. As for your last question, I'm afraid I don't quite know how to answer that."

Note from Mel: Please only send one or two asks at a time. This was a bit overwhelming, and it makes tagging complicated.

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cellophaneloves-blog · 7 years ago

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hey everyone ! i’m mari and i’m a muse addict ( monotone vc: hi mari ) ! but frfr i have picked up 5 muses which is more than i’ve ever picked up before so this is going to be WILD. for my mascot i’ll be usually using selena gomez, and be warned, i do write ooc posts quite a bit just because my schedule can be kind of wild and i like to keep u guys updated u know ??? anyWhO i’ll be doing all of my character intro’s separate because of the way i work which is the following!!!

if you’d like to plot with a character, go ahead and like their intro n i’ll message u !!! it just makes it A LOT easier when i’m organizing messages / wc / all that :-)

LET’S GET DOWN TO BUSINESS ( to defeat the huns ) first intro goes to my oldest muse, christopher adam walker ! to find out more about him, click that lil button n read on !

- ̗̀ sebastian stan. thirty-five. cismale. he/him. ̖́- — look what the cat dragged in ! around eversley, christopher adam walker has earned himself quite the reputation as the local raconteur. maybe it’s because he’s constantly got it’s time by imagine dragons playing, or because they’re always polishing glasses — who knows ? all i know is that he’s a bar owner at walkers and when he last visited eversley college, he left an ambitious &level headed impression ! it’s too bad that there’s rumours that he’s a bit sarcastic & blunt.i suppose you can’t know unless you get to know walker ! ( raised in the same town his feet touch down on, it’s a wonder why he never left. sarcastic comments and no scholarship aided in the answer, not that it hurt him when falling in love. not the first time, and not the second, a beautiful wife with a time bomb on her heart, using borrowed time. it is better to have loved and lost, but the loss is something he could never lose. fuller with recounted stories retold nightly to customers and the reappearance of someone he thought was gone. sometimes, all you need is hope. )

so chris was born and raised in town where he was a little bit of a trouble maker. not that he was rude to teachers or anything like that, he was just really sarcastic ? to everyone ? n it was just kinda HIM.

when he was in high school he really sucked at his second language class n like failed that fcking class TWICE like are you kidding me ?? but he got very good grades in everything else.

um feel in love w a cute lil blonde ??? pretty sure if someone was peaking into their conversations, there were 100% times that no one could tell if they were being serious bc their both sarcastic little shits.

um but yeh then high school ended, he applied to colleges and got into every one that he applied to ( except penn state, like ok .. f u 2 penn state ) but didn’t get the scholarships he needed, so he wasn’t able to go. and w his father not being able to work, it just wasn’t worth it to him.

so with his fathers help, he was able to put together the idea/drafts of walkers. and one day when he went to the bank wearing a really stuffy suit that he HATED n rehearsing under his breath why he should be applicable for a loan, there was this brunette that actually laughed at him LAUGHED AT HIM

like he was SO insulted but then it was like the nerves or something n he started laughing too.

um he got a loan and he asks her out to dinner ! dead ass goes, ‘ all right, as long as u don’t fall in love with me! ’ he laughs ! ( and doesn’t listen )

( death tw ; illness tw ; cancer mention tw ) there was a reason she told him not to fall in love w him ! she had a rare from of leukemia and she was living, knowing that she didn’t have that much time left. after dating for a year, and with him knowing this, they got married. and he stayed by her side until the very end. which was fckin SO HARD ( end tw )

after that, he dove into his work. he helped around town a lot with certain events. and took over walkers and let his father retire. he didn’t really take interest in dating maybe went out on like ,, two dates a year.

then he got a call from his passed wife’s sister, completely fed up and somehow his niece from his wife’s side was getting shipped over to him from alabama to get ‘something in that empty brain of hers’

so that like ? distracted him a lot n he was able to use that as an excuse to why he didn’t really date.

then one day someone comes back to town, and someone in the council is taking this blonde on a tour and he knows who it is and like that was the only person that he was basically like ‘i’ve already lost this love that i had because of like this terrible cause, i’m not going to lose an opportunity to ask this girl out that i still feel something for’

except she was engaged.

was NOT shy about how he would be better for her. :-)

but i guess shit worked out because they’re together now so HA.

really really hard to piss him off ?? like the last person who pissed him off was this super drunk guy who came into the bar and broke five glasses on purpose and he like ,,, threw him out of the bar but the next day he came into pay for them and he was like ‘...okay’

tells A LOT of stories. like he’s ur typical bartender/therapist basically. probably always has a fuckin rag with him lmao.

#eversley:intro

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