#dream is also here I gues x]

[deskatt]

Ink sketch :p (this guy is a worm in my head that I didn't ever expect to have)

[makeitmingi]

The Cat and Dog Game [Chapter 38]

Genre: Romance, Fluff, Comedy

Pairing: Yunho x Reader (y/n)

Characters: Chef!Reader, RestaurantOwner!Yunho, MaitreD!Hongjoong, Waiter!Yeosang, Waiter!San, Waiter!Mingi, SousChef!Seonghwa, SousChef!Wooyoung, PrepChef!Jongho

Summary: Yunho's dream was to open and run his own restaurant. But he doesn't know anything when it comes to cooking. Until you came along and accepted the job, bringing with you a small crew. How will the black cat tame the energetic golden retriever?

Word count: 3.3K

"We should take it to the vet tomorrow." You said as you and Yunho hovered over the kitten. You placed some wet cat food onto a paper plate and he was so quick to eat it up. Yes, you also learnt that the kitten is a boy.

"We should but the only free time we have is between morning and dinner service. Plus it's Friday so we're going to be busy." Yunho said.

"I'll do it after the morning shift then." You smiled.

"And by 'I', you mean 'we'." Yunho laughed and pressed his forehead against your temple. Instead of hovering, he sat on the floor and pulling you to sit on his lap.

"There, we can watch him like this." He said, resting his chin on your shoulder with his arms around your waist.

"It's late, you still have to drive back." You stood up. Yunho nodded in agreement.

"You can handle the little one?" Yunho chuckled. You hummed, smiling softly as you looked over at the kitten that was rolling all over your rug, happy to have a full belly of food.

Although Yunho wanted to ask to stay the night or thought that you would offer him that option, he didn't want to overstep so he willing got his coat to leave. Maybe you just wanted the house and your bed to yourself since you had all 8 of them over last night. He understood that you needed to recharge.

"Goodbye. I'll see you again tomorrow." Yunho said, gently stroking the kitten's head with the back of his finger.

"Thanks again for tonight." You said, looking up at him as he got ready to leave.

"No need to thank me. Have a good night, I'll see you tomorrow?" He tilted his head. You nodded and tip toed to give him a goodbye kiss before he headed out the door.

"Alright, let's set you up for the night." You said to the kitten. You cleared the used plates and brought the animal crate to your room.

"Here." You placed some blankets inside, making sure it was warm and comfortable before placing the kitten inside.

"There, all comfy for you." You chuckled. You didn't buy a cat bed because you didn't know if the kitten will be permenantly staying with you so you just grabbed a crate to ferry him around.

After making sure the kitten was settled, you went to remove all your makeup and take a shower. However, mid shower, you didn't expect a little black shadow to push open the bathroom door and enter. He let out a loud meow to establish his presence.

"Geez! You scared me!" You jumped slightly, placing a hand over your racing heart. But he just sat there, staring back at you with a tilt of his head.

"Don't be clingy like a golden retriever." You said, snickering. Once you stepped out, you changed into comfy home clothes.

"Hey, Hwa... I'm home." You said to Seonghwa with the phone on speaker as you did you skincare.

"Hey, sweetheart. I was about to call you. You don't have to come in for morning shift, you know? You can go home and rest after your morning session. We understand."

"I know but you guys can't keep giving me all these exceptions, it's not fair and unprofessional of me." You sighed.

"It's not exceptions. We're friends, practically family. We do it for anyone that needs it."

"I know that... And I'm really grateful for the 3 of you being so supportive. But it's fine, really. I'll be okay. Working would serve as a good distraction rather than just laying in bed." You said, finishing up your nightly routine of skincare. You took the phone with you as you did your laundry.

"But-"

*meow*

"D-Did you just meow at me?"

"What?! No, that's not me. I have a... house guest." You turned the call to a video call, turning the camera to show Seonghwa the kitten that was now curled by your feet.

"I thought you were only having dinner with Yunho's family! When did you get a cat?!"

"It's a long story. He's just staying with me until I can get him to a vet tomorrow and decide what to do with him." You informed.

"It's actually really funny, (y/n). You compare Yunho to a golden retriever every chance you get and now, it's like I'm seeing two of you. Can barely tell the difference."

"Very funny, Hwa. You'll be glad to know that Yunho's been making fun of me the whole night, comparing me to the kitten. That's utter nonsense, I am not a black cat or like one." You scoffed, stroking the kitten as it sat on your thigh.

"Sure~ Like how Yunho denies that he's an overly excited golden retriever puppy."

"You know what, see you tomorrow, Hwa." You scoffed and hung up while he was busy laughing at you. You picked the kitten up and placed him in his crate.

"Stay here. I'll see you in the morning. Goodnight." You stroked its head and went to bed.

-

When Yunho arrived at the restaurant the next morning, he looked at his phone. He had sent you a morning text and asked about the kitten but you haven't opened the message.

"Maybe she's busy." He shrugged, it was a Friday morning after all. You probably didn't even have time to look at your phone like always. But when he entered the kitchen, he was surprised to see your crew already working without you there. Yunho went to the locker room but you weren't there either.

"She's coming in late. Had something to attend to." Seonghwa spoke as he mixed the cake batter.

"Oh... Okay, thanks." Yunho frowned slightly, scratching his head as he went to the front. You didn't mention this to him last night. Did something happen to the kitten during the night?

"Sorry, the number you have dialled is-"

Yunho chewed on his bottom lip, you were not answering your phone or your texts. He straightened up and went to call Seonghwa out.

"What's up?" Seonghwa asked with raised eyebrows as he leaned against the counter.

"Hyung, (y/n)'s okay, right? It's just, I was with her last night and she didn't mention that she had anything on this morning that would make her late... So I'm just worried..." Yunho rambled.

"She's fine, Yunho. There's not much I can tell you... But rest assure, she's okay. But she's not contactable." Seonghwa placed his hand on Yunho's shoulder to give it a light squeeze and gave the taller a small smile. Yunho nodded his head slowly.

"As long as she's okay. Let me know if you guys need any help in the kitchen." He forced a smile.

"We will. And yes, she's okay. If she wasn't, I would have told you. She should be coming in soon." Seonghwa nodded and headed back to the kitchen to continue baking.

"What's up?" Wooyoung tipped his head at Seonghwa when he saw the older come back in.

"Asked about (y/n). You know she's uncontactable and he's worried because she didn't tell him that she'll be late today." Seonghwa said.

"Oh... No wonder he's worried. Wait, she hasn't told him yet?" Jongho asked as he took the cookies out of the oven. Seonghwa shook his head with a soft sigh.

"It's her decision to tell him. We all know how private she is..." Wooyoung reminded.

Just then, you walked into the kitchen, yawning with two big cups of coffee in your hands. Not even saying hi to your team, you went to the locker room to put your things down first. You leaned against the shelves, taking long sips of your coffee. You needed coffee immediately so you bought two cups.

"Hey." Seonghwa popped in.

"Hey, Hwa, sorry. I'll be right out." You grabbed your apron and tied it around your waist. He hummed and went back to the kitchen to wait for you.

"(y/n), are you okay?" San tilted his ehad when he saw you come out, setting your cups of coffee aside.

"Morning, San. Yes, I'm fine. Thanks for stepping in to help." You chuckled and went to wash your hands. With you around, you were able to take over and San went back out to the front.

"They don't need you anymore?" Mingi asked as he filled the machine with more coffee beans.

"Nope. (y/n)'s here so I think they got it handled." San informed.

"(y/n)'s here? Like here in the kitchen?" Yunho blinked. San raised an eyebrow at his question but nodded his head slowly, with much uncertainty and confusion. Yunho put his things down and went to the kitchen.

"Jagiya~" Wooyoung was hugging you from the back, rocking you from side to side with a smug smile on his face. You were unbothered, cutting up something in front of you.

"Woo, this isn't very safe when I'm using my knife." You said but of course he ignores you.

"We should discuss the dinner menu for tonight so I can get started on prep." You told the rest of the team.

Throughout the time he has been with you, Yunho has been learning how to read you. You were functioning and speaking fine to your team but there was exhaustion on your face.

"Kicking it old school, tonight's pasta is bolognese." You smiled and the boys clapped.

"Traditional style, of course?" Jongho asked and you nodded.

"For fish, let's do a mi cuit salmon with microgreens, buerre blanc, potato puree and pickled beetroot." You said, waving your hand to get your thought processing out. (Mi cuit is French for half baked. Salmon is sous vide at a low temperature until firm but still has the texture, look and taste of raw salmon)

"I think we should do a wet brine for the salmon before putting it into the sous vide." Seonghwa suggested and you wrote it down.

"We should do pork chops with stewed apples and blue cheese sauce." Wooyoung raised his hand.

"Alright. We can throw the pork chops into the sous vide machines. If we have the sous vides going, let's do some chicken breast for classic caesar?" You tilted your head.

"We still have those smaller, thin cuts of beef... What can we do with them?" Jongho reminded.

"Let's leave it for tomorrow." You said.

Yunho quietly observed how you continued to lead the discussion on the food menu for dinner. Like the professional you always are, you didn't let whatever was bothering you affect your work.

"Dessert, let's do sticky toff. It's been a while!" Seonghwa was quick to throw his suggestion in.

"I question the personal motive behind that suggestion but I do agree that it's been a while. So we're doing individual sticky toffee puddings with caramel sauce and vanilla custard? Or should we do ice cream?" You chuckled.

"Ice cream is better since we already have caramel sauce." Wooyoung said. You wrote down everything and pinned it up.

"Alright, let's finish up here and start on some prep work. Then I'll continue after you guys leave." You said. They nodded and you got to work right away.

"We'll do the cleaning." Seonghwa and Wooyoung did it while Jongho assisted you with prepping.

"Hey." Yunho came in.

"Oh, hey." You smiled. But of course, Yunho wouldn't just greet you with a smile. He came over to hug you tightly, quickly planting a kiss to the top of your head.

"You want a coffee?" He offered. You shook your head, nodding over to the two cups of coffee you had brought in with you.

"Is it okay to be drinking so much coffee at once?" Yunho tilted his head.

"Nope!" Seonghwa answered for you, making you roll your eyes. You scoffed loudly to show Seonghwa you were ignoring him and patted Yunho on the hip before going back to help Jongho with the prep. Having already missed the morning stuff, you didn't want to lag behind, you wanted to make up for the work that you didn't do.

You noticed that Yunho was strangely quiet but you couldn't put your finger on it. Usually, he was loud and excited when he sees you but today, he greeted you and left obediently.

"Is Yunho okay? Did something happen when I wasn't around?" You asked Jongho.

"Nothing happened but Yunho hyung was worried when he didn't see you this morning. Didn't know where you were..." Jongho informed.

"Oh." You replied, continuing your prep work.

"Fridge?" Wooyoung came over, seeing the containers of prepped ingredients that you were done with. You nodded and he helped you bring them all to the walk in.

"You guys should head off soon, I"ve got it covered here." You said, checking your watch.

"Don't stay too long. We'll see you tonight, princess." The boys all left without argument. Wooyoung hugged you tightly and gave you a big kiss on your cheek, to which you scrunched your nose. Jongho gave you a brief hug.

"Don't overwork yourself, sweetheart, hmm?" Seonghwa stroked your head. You hummed and he hugged you before patting your head with a soft smile.

"The crew just left?" Yunho came in.

"Yeah, I'm finishing up on the prep. After that, we'll go back to mine to pick up the kitten for the vet?" You asked.

"Sure. Do you need help in here?" Yunho leaned against the metal counter.

"Help me fill the big bins with water? I'll need to clamp the sous vide machines and get it heated." You pointed. Yunho helped you do that while you cooked the caramel sauce for the dessert.

"What else is there to do...?" You thought out loud and went over your list of things that you could prep.

"(y/n), why don't I pick the kitten up from yours then we can bring it to the vet from here?" Yunho suggested.

"Oh, sure." You were surprised at his suggestion but you weren't against it. You gave Yunho the key to your place and he left to pick the kitten up. Now you were worried, Yunho and you were always together, given the opportunity. It was odd for him to suggest he go ahead and pick the kitten up first.

"I'm done with my duties." Hongjoong came in, finding you alone. Honestly, he thought he would find Yunho in here with you.

"Can you bring that tray of meats to me, please?" You requested. He brought over the vacuum pack sealed pork chops for you to dump into the heated sous vide water.

"Where's Yunho?" Hongjoong asked, continuing to help you were he could.

"Oh, he went to help me pick something up from my place. He'll be back soon." You informed.

"Are you alright, (y/n)? Is something bothering you?" Hongjoong noted how you were slightly distracted as you were doing whatever you were doing.

"I'm probably overthinking it but Yunho's just acting a little weird today so I'm wondering if everything's okay." You shrugged.

"Hmm, from what I know nothing happened today in the store and he's been fine... You know, the usual Yunho... I'm sure it's nothing, don't be too worried. We all have our off days, even energetic puppies." He gave a comforting smile.

"Yeah, you're right. Thanks, Hongjoong." You laughed in agreement, it was funny to hear Yunho's friends refer to him as a puppy too. Subsequently, the other boys came in to offer help too.

"All these in the fridge?" Yeosang checked.

"Yeah. But keep the trays separate, they're portioned according to the different dishes." You said.

"Sure." He and Mingi brought it whatever you were done with. With their help, you were done relatively quickly. Just in time, Yunho pulled up to the restaurant.

"Bye, thanks guys. See you tonight." You waved to them before hopping into Yunho's passenger seat.

"Thanks for going to pick him up." You said.

"You're very welcome, love. Are you tired?" Yunho softened, reaching over to cup your cheek. You shook your head, leaning into his touch and closing your eyes. You let out a long exhale.

"Shall we talk after the vet?" He asked. You hesitated for a while before nodding, even if your heart was pounding nervously against your chest. With that, Yunho drove to the vet clinic where you had made an appointment for the kitten this morning. He helped you carry the crate with the kitten.

"Hi, I have an appointment?" You went to register at the receptionist counter. Yunho watched your back as you signed the kitten in.

"At least just now when I went to pick him up, he wasn't trying to maul me." Yunho said to you as you took the seat beside him to wait for your turn.

"Maul you? I highly doubt that tiny kitten can maul someone so much bigger like yourself." You laughed.

"He's opening up to me. See? I have that effect on black cats." He coughed, sending you a mischievous grin and side eye.

"I'm not a black cat." You scoffed, picking up the crate and looking at the kitten inside. It let out a small meow and pressed his nose against the gate to try and sniff you.

"Cutie. I hope you slept well." You giggled. He clawed at the gate to show his frustration of being locked up. So you caved and let him out of the crate. However, instead of putting him in your lap, you set him down in Yunho's.

"Since you claim he's comfortable with you now." You laughed, leaning against his arm.

"I said he didn't try to maul me, I didn't say he's comfortable with me." Yunho rolled his eyes but watched as the kitten tried to get comfortable, curling up in his lap.

When the nurse called you, you held the kitten in your arms while Yunho held the crate and entered the vet's office.

"Good afternoon. What can I do for you today?" The vet smiled. However, her smile seemed to grow bigger when she saw Yunho walk in.

"We found this kitten last night in the park, abandoned in the box. We're not sure how long he's been there. So we just want to make sure he's fine." You explained.

"Oh, sure. That's so nice of you to take him in, I'll just do a general check of him." She said, staring at Yunho as she spoke. You raised an eyebrow of amusement at her behaviour and her suddenly flirtatious smile, she was obviously very taken to Yunho's good looks. I mean, who isn't?

"Thank you, doctor." Innocent and ever-so kind Yunho smiled back with bowed his head. He came to stand by your side as the doctor examined the kitten.

"From what I see, judging by his posture, he's about 4 weeks old? But he's malnourished." She said.

"Good that you cleaned him and fed him." She smiled at Yunho.

You were not jealous and you knew how Yunho was. He wasn't deliberately flirting back with her, he was too kind and gracious to anyone he meets. He can't help his golden retriever tendencies.

"Actually, my girlfriend did it all, she's amazing. The kitten isn't too friendly with me yet." Yunho grinned.

"Oh..." The vet cleared her throat awkwardly at the mention of the word 'girlfriend'. You had to purse your lips to stop yourself from laughing at her expression.

"Let me just do some scans and bloodwork. You can wait outside, we'll call you again when we're done." The doctor said a little more uncomfortably now. You nodded and headed to the exit but Yunho quickly grabbed your hand, making you give him a look.

"She kept smiling at me, I felt oddly violated." Yunho whimpered softly to you.

~

Series masterlist

[fartquen12]

hi ur bff here can u write ghost from cod smut :3c

AHH THIS BUM... okay... i gues,,

GHOST FROM COD x Fem!READER

Trigger warnings: you already know *rolls eyes* Poop, Mini kyle, MY version of y/n, pee, dookie, farts, dookie, smut,yander, non/con.

AS ALWAYS NO MINI KYLES AND NO MINI RAVIS.

EVERLASTING BUTTCRAACK ```~

One day you were walking around in england and making toots in england WHEN all of the sudden... you saw this sus guy. HE WAS ALSO MAKING TOOTS. So you walked up to him.

"You copy me." You said firously

"WHAT!" he said really mad

he towered over you with a nasty glare before grabbing your throat causing you to yelp and blocking your windpipe.

"Dont. you. EVER. make. toots. in. england." He spat at you. his dookie colored eyes staring back at you.

"f-f-f-f" you wanted to say it but-

"F-f-f-f-f" he mocked you and twirled his fake hair.

"FOCK YOU!" you yelled out as you raised a knee and kicked him in the nut sack and ran off.

``````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

You went into a gas station and bought some beer and candy. When you walked out you saw this... weird red van. Bright headlights staring back at you as you raised an arm over your eyes trying to block the light. It was so dark outside you couldnt make out what it was.

You ran over to the van and began cussing out the driver and throwing beer cans at the side, denting it. But the red van just sped off.

"WTF!!!:" you yelled.

````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

You were asleep in your bed...

*CREAK*

Your eyes flashed open and your heart began pounding.

"OH GOD THE FBI IS HERE TO GET ME!" You yelled jumping out off bed and ran for the window. It was after your second foot left the window and you were headed down at a rapid pace that you remembered you live 68 stories up...

You shat hella out of fear before feeling the impact. but you didnt hit your head. and you didnt feel anything. Thats when you saw.. THE OFFENSIVE TOOTER Headed at you with a GUN!!

You got up and began running!

"MAN I KNEW THIS GUY WORKED FOR THE FBI!"

You jumped over kids, cars, dogs, fatasses, bums. but you didnt escape it. THere was even a bum rooting you on but you still tripped and he threw a STANKY LEG paper towel ovever your nose and you passed out.

`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

What the.

"WHERE THE FUCK AM I!" You yelled looking around.

"Shhh..-"

"AHH THE FBI!!! LISTEN IM SORRY I FARTED ON THAT GUY!! AND IM SORRY I KILLED 20,000 PEOPLE YOU KNOW I DIDNT MEAN TOO!!!" you yelled

silence filled the air and the offended tooter looked confused.. scared even.

Like there was something behind you.

You zipped around in the spinny office chair you were tied to to make sure there was no backrooms doors monster,. luckily there wasnt.

"thats hot."

What the fuck... you thought to yourself. the offended tooter is now saying that your... hot.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN TOOTER!! I KILL PEOPLE!!" you accused angrily

"STOP CALLING ME TOOTER IVE NEVER FARTED IN FRONT OF YOU. Killing people is h-"

"NOT HOT!" Yoyu finished his sentence.. or atleast you thought it was a man...

*you felt something sharp in your neck before passing out*

``````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

You woke up with no clothes on and a pile of dookie next to you!!

"AHH WHAT THE!!?" you were also on the street. You ran over to your apartment which was right next door luckily and you threw yourself into the shower and threw some clothes on.

*Did i sleep walk again* you thought. hmm.

It was nothing just a bad dream you thought as you layed down.

In the window behind you was the face of the angry tooter.

I guess youll never know if it was a dream or not

```````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

CREDIT

WRITER: fartquen12

IDEA: anon

THIS FIC THREW BOOTYCHEEKS BUT WHATEVER

[animesllut666]

"In my Dreams... I know, it seems odd."

Characters: Sesshomaru x GN Reader ft. Kagome and Inuyasha, others.

Anime: Inuyasha

Warnings: none... Inuyasha and Sesshomaru being themselves.

Request: Hi! Could you write an Sesshomaru x reader Story. Something like the Reader is Kagomes best Friend and Comes with her,because she dreams all the time from Sesshomaru. Like a Vision and she wants to find him. Sry my english is Bad I now.

An: Hope ya like it! I took a little bit of a different approach towards the end. And please, don't apologize for your English! You are doing great an still learning. Your English, is perfect. Have a great day and enjoy!

Feed back is always encouraged and REBLOGS are appreciated!

----------------------------

"Sesshomaru? How do you know that name?" Kagome questioned, she was left dumbfounded when her best friend was waiting at the well for her. Then left struck, when they started to ask questions, and describe a man that looked (and acted) like Sesshomaru.

But what really threw her, was when you said his name, "And his name is.. sess..no...Sessomaro.. no that's wrong. Sesshomaru! It's Sesshomaru!! Kagome, please, I beg you let me come with you." You pleaded, hands clapping together as you jumped down from the edge of the well.

She took a step back, the another till the last step of the stairs stabbed her ankle. Causing her to fall flat on her bum, "Ow, I.. I don't even know if you'd be able to cross over with me though. And how, how do you know his name? Wait how do you know any of this? I haven't told you anything, sure I've spoken about Inuyasha an-"

"In my dreams, I know it seems odd. But, I've been having dreams of this man, his long white hair and fire orange eyes. It.. it almost seems like I've known him from a past life. Please Kagome, let me go with you!"

"Still doesn't answer my questions, how you know to even come to the wel-"

"I've watched you a few times drop in and come out... Plus your brother told me everything, and your grandpa."

"THEY TOLD YOU?" Kagome shouted in disbelief, shocked but also not surprised by her family telling you everything. Though shocked by how well you seemed to be taking this, even if you were having these dreams with Sesshomaru in them.

"I don't even know if you'd be able to cross over, I only can because of these jewell shards," She told you taking the necklace out from underneath her shirt. "It would be nice, to finally bring someone else over that I knew, and I'm sure your parents already know you are here."

A squeal left your mouth, as Kagome stood up, and grabbed your hand gentle. Guiding you both towards the well, that would maybe or maybe not let you go to sengoku period of Japan.

"Okay, lets see if this works or not!" She shouted with glee, as you both jumped down the well, a scream emerging from your lips falling into the dark hole. Squeezing your eyes shut but still feeling a cold blast of wind, and a feel of tingles and goosebumps.

"Kagome!" You heard someone shout, but the voice sounded familiar. "I can't believe it worked, you're here!" Peaking an eye open at the excitement and disbelief in her voice. You were met with the wall of the well, but sunlight was shining in.

Sunlight?

SUNLIGHT!

"Am I.. here? Like here, here?"

"Yeah! Now come on, I want you too meet everyone! They've already heard so much about you!"

You both climbed up the vines, mentally wondering why there wasnt an ladder just yet in here. "Hey Kagome, what took..Yua?" A guy with white hair and dog ears, stood at the base of the tree line. A confused and shocked expression.

"Dog ears?" Was the only thing on your mind, not that he just called you a name that was certainly not your own.

"What? No, this is (_). There my best friend back home, and well.. I'll explain it later. I'm hungry, and I'm gue-"

"Did you bring chips?"

"Sit boy."

Even though Inuyasha was faced down in the dirt right now, he was still shocked to see the spitting image of his brother ex-lover.

Even though she had been killed by a gang of demons, which resulted in Sesshomaru going on a killing spree for three moons.

[seokljin]

ult group tag  💕

tagged by the sweetest @jintae @kooseokss & @dnaez \ @dnaes

rules: answer the following questions for your ult group

who was your first bias?

- hobi

who is your bias now?

- 2seok, sun & moon.... i'm just the typical astrology loving gay (but also yoon is trailing v closely by)

what was the first mv you watched by them?

- black swan art film

what’s your favorite mv?

- first of all, fuck you. second if we don't include mixtapes; black swan, ego & run

if you could listen to one of their songs for the rest of your life, which would it be?

- good day but also jamais vu, baepsae, outro: tear, ugh!, every cypher, trivia love, every seokjin\hobi\tae solo

who would you want to see them collab with?

- mitski, kim petras, shinee and oh my gosh i will sell my first born for rap line x clipping. 

what mv concept do you want to see them do?

- victorian gothic vampires 🖤🥀⛓🔪🩸 but also super pink soft gentle eternal gleaming fairies 💗✨🩰🧚🌸 and hobi taking the boys to hopeworld!! if it's to dis-ease bonus points 👌

have you ever had a dream with any of the members in it?

-  v recently!! for the first time ever!!! a incrediblely sweet dream where i attended their masterclass? lecture? and yoon was sitting in the crowd behind me (i guess bc of his shoulder? idk) and while the boys talked on stage he "secretly" played around with the audience using these huge cards against humanity cards like he held the answers to audience members black cards and as the boys wrapped up on stage i leaned over to ask him if i could ask him v small quick q and he was all smiles and said ofc!! and i asked if he himself recorded the birds in set me free and if yes what birds were they and if he wanted that breeds specifically; r they the ones he hear every morning outside his window or did he went somewhere especially to record them....and he got really excited abt my question and replied he did recorded them himself and he won't tell me all now bc it's smth he wants to talk abt lengthily "i promised i'll do album review right? that's going to be the first thing i'll talk about i promise i really want to" OH MY GOD I'M TYPING TOO MUCH (shout out to rachel the only reason i remember this is bc i wrote it down to her as soon as i woke up, ty for putting up with me ily 💖) but if you've read till here i'll finish: basically after that i thanked him and was bubbling about what this song means to me and he was smiling huge and thanked me back, and namjoon came along as he was talking (and he was all smiles as well as he heard our exchange) and as i was getting up to leave i still tried to pry out a lil bit "could you tell me what bird or birds were/they? were there a few or just one? and was it one breed? or few types of birds?" yoongi laughed and said smth to nj in korean and nj translated "it was just one type" and yoongi repeated that as well in eng and they were super happy and laughing as i was leaving

2 quote ksj okay thank you finished! this is such a tmi oh my gosh i really wrote all of it sorry 🙊 such a overshare but it's bc i was so overjoyed abt this dream!!!!!!! bc i've been having really bad sleep for the past few months (like literally waking up sweating from nightmares most mornings) and this was so cute but also i'm so sad bc in rl he already did a d2 vilve so i gues we'll never know the real answers for all my birds questions 😔

if you could spend the day with one member, who would it be and what would you do?

- yoongi. i think me and yoongi are the most similar and i find it difficult to maintain friendship with ppl who are like me, tho we do get close really fast- and so one day where we hang out and talk about art\music\film\history.. anything

which member do you think you’d get along with the best?

- tae and namjoon. yoon 2 but c above :((

which member do you think you would argue with?

- namjoon, but friendly arguments; discussion and disagreement abt our shared interests

if you had to let one member scroll through your tumblr, who would it be?

- this blog?? idk hobi? my main definitely yoongi, i think he would enjoy it very much <33

tagging: as always only if you feel like it ilysm mwah <33333 @daechwitas @eternal-bangtan @slipped-away @ambivartence @honsool @jung-koook @jingetspegged @syubb @kimtaehyunq  and @ anyone else who wants to! consider yourself tagged <3

[ur-fav-alien]

This was something I’m twt but cuz I’m a pussy i didn’t want to post it on there so I’m doing it here. The tweet was asking the misfits fandom (the gamers not the show) how they felt on irl shipping and that got me thinking since in the past I used to irl ship (Shane and Ryan from buzzfeed unsolved, I no longer really ship them)

I think that if you understand you aren’t shipping real people rather their yt personalities/personas and the youtubers are fine with it I think it’s fine. If you take it too far like putting their personal lives into your fanfic, threaten them, telling them how you think they should fuck, make ONLY smut fanfic, etc, etc then yeah you shouldn’t ship irl but if you keep it cute and nice then everything’s gonna be fine.

An example that I can think of is Dream and George, they are okay with you guys shipping them and from what I’ve seen of fanart you guys aren’t making fanart of the irl dream or the irl George rather their personas. As soon as they say they are uncomfortable with the shipping you stop but if your being respectful and not sexualizing them I think it’s fine. Also I suggest keeping the shipping to yourself and what I mean is don’t tag them in your fanart or fanfic of the irl ship even if they don’t care if you ship them rather just do @/ then tag them so people still know that it’s those two people.

So just a TL:DR if you are irl shipping please just be respectful and don’t sexualize them and when the two people your shipping say they are uncomfortable stop shipping them (I.e. swagger and fitz said that shipping makes them uncomfortable especially ‘x reader’ shipping so respect that and leave them out of your ships) and always ALWAYS ship their personas not the actual *real* people (I.e. Dream and George or possibly CaptainSparklez and Syndicate from what I believe). That’s my opinion and if you disagree with it then uhh.... I guess tell me? Idk bro just like tell me what you think I gues akdnakmddk

[diaryofabeautyfiend]

Small Time Witch (15)

The water in the stream lapped at its banks swelling from the melting mountain snow. You and Bethany brought out sand bags and placed them around the perimeter of the house. How high the water rose depended on the snowfall. It always flooded in the bend of the stream which is why you never understood why Helene built here. “Rushing water holds energy. It amplifies everything we do.” It also amplified the chance that you’d be redoing the floors in a few weeks.

“Why can’t your mother just use her powers? This would be a lot easier.” Bethany would ask as she dropped another bag.

“Because there are consequences to us using our powers which is why I was shipped off.”

“And here I thought it was so you didn’t face prosecution for almost killing Bobby.” You flicked mud at her.

“I didn’t almost kill him. He was fine.” She threw mud back.

“He pissed himself. Charles Xavier had to tell everyone he had a seizure.” You both laughed.

“Girls! Get cleaned up for dinner.” Helene called from the porch.

“Yes, Aunt Helene” you said in unison.

“Why can’t you stay? We miss you.”

“You know it’s for all our own good, Bethy. I’m the only one with a dangerous power.”

“Hey! I can freeze stuff!”

You giggled, “Yeah only if everyone is real quiet and you are well hydrated.”

🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕

You often dreamed of being back home but it was rare they were good dreams. Mostly you had nightmares about the day everyone died. Rarely did you have dreams when you felt happy.

You woke up a little misty eyed. Goodness did you miss your family. You were so lost in thought that you didn’t hear Steve calling your name. “Earth to Y/N. You ok?”

“Yeah. Bad dream.” You got out of bed and started getting ready for your day. He watched you smiling as you hummed your way through your morning routine. You were not in your usual work attire when you finished.

“Where are you going today?” he asked confused. “Aren’t you usually a little more put together for work?”

“I have the day off. I have Strange all morning and then off to Dr. Calloway.” You wrapped your arms around his waste. He hugged you back.

“Will you tell your doctor about your bad dreams? You looked so lost this morning. I hate seeing my girl that way.”

“Yes, Captain.”

“I am not your boss. I am not giving you orders. Just the concerned boyfriend.”

“Yes. My very bossy boyfriend. I’ll tell him. It’s not like he ever really explores anything. It’s all ‘how does that make you feel?’ and ‘Let’s up your anti depressants.’”

“Does that work?”

“Would work if I was actually depressed. I think I might stop seeing him after today’s session.” Steve’s whole body got stiff.

“Why? Since you’ve been seeing him you haven’t accidentally shocked anyone.”

“That wasn’t his doing. I didn’t shock you in Germany did I?” No. Loki taught you how to control yourself. He would scoff at anti-depressants. Nothing was wrong with them if they were actually doing anything for you. They just dulled your senses and made you feel nauseous. “Well. I have to get going.”

“No breakfast?” You smiled at him over your shoulder.

“I’ll grab a banana on the way out. Love you!”

“Love you too. Hey! We have a mission briefing at four. Don’t be late.”

“Yes, sir.” They asked you to run point on an operation in Alaska. It was dealing with enhanced people and there was some intel that said they were a lot like you. That was the only information they gave.

Steve waited until he saw your car drive down the road before he called Tony. “We have a problem. She’s talking about leaving Dr.Calloway’s care.”

“Shit. Ok. I’ll call and give him a heads up. She cannot stop taking those meds, Steve. Not until we can convince Strange to bind her powers.”

Steve squeezed his eyes closed and pinched the bridge of his nose, “Are we sure we want to do this? Maybe Strange is right. With the proper training she can control it. She was doing well with Loki. She never hurt me again.”

“Cap, maybe one day you’ll be on our side. I read her SHIELD file. Fury was right. The girl is a nuclear bomb with a short fuse. This Alaska thing is huge. We need her to control herself. A lot of lives are at stake. Get it together, Steve.” With that Tony hung up.

Steve felt nauseous. He hated doing this to you. He adored you. If you found out he was lying to you...he hated to think what you’d do. He’d deserve it. He picked up the phone and called the only person he believed would be able to guide him.

“Professor? This is Steve Rogers. I’m wondering if you would have some time talk to me about one of your former students. I can be there within the hour. Thank you, sir. I’ll see you soon.” He grabbed the keys to his bike and headed to the school.

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

You made it a few minutes early to Doctor Strange. You were spooked every time you went to the mansion on Bleeker. Wong greeted you at the door and said Strange would be meeting you shortly. You browsed the volumes on the bookshelves. You selected one that looked tattered but well loved. When you opened the pages it blinked out of your hands and was replaced by a cup of tea. You actually liked the tea.

“That is not for you. Let’s get started.”

“What’s that one about? Transfiguration? Can I learn that?”

“Not today. Focus, Y/N.”

Strange was always a bit terse with you. He had absolutely no patience. You wished someone else was teaching you. You received no feedback unless you did something wrong. He didn’t tolerate chit chat or small talk of any kind. At least when you worked with Wong he gave you treats when you did something well. The only consolation you got was that you knew he was looking out for you. That meant sometimes he told you things you wished you didn’t have to hear.

“Your boss came to see me yesterday. He asked me to bind your powers. I told him to fuck off.” You felt like the air left your body. You knew Fury had secret plans for you but Tony? He was supposed to be a good guy.

“Did he say why?”

“Yes. Some crap about you killing a kid when you were younger. That attack at the school. I know what happened that day. You don’t have to worry about me. Just saying watch your back. They are escalating from the Wolfsbane.”

You wanted to ask if Steve knew but you were sure he did. Tears started flowing down your cheeks which made Strange uncomfortable. “You are doing well here, kid. We can be done for today. See you next week.” Before you had a chance to say anything he shoved you through a portal.

“I know how to use a door!” You shouted towards the house. You shot Steve a text letting him know you were done a little early if he wanted to have lunch. When he didn’t answer after a few minutes you decided to completely blow off your doctor’s appointment and go shopping instead. It’s pretty rare when you had time to yourself these days so you decided to take advantage.

Escalating from the wolfsbane. It was entirely possible that your boss and your boyfriend knew they were poisoning you. It was also possible they didn’t if they were fed wrong information. There were some studies that showed Aconite in low low doses can help with anxiety and in rare cases heart failure. You had to know how to handle the herb correctly. Even the most practiced healer would try a thousand other herbs before this one. Dr. Calloway didn’t seem like he was on the up and up from your first visit. When you read the label on the medicine bottle you decided not to take it because you knew what it was. You showed it to Strange who suggested you call the police since you were being poisoned. “He’s clearly not a licensed medical professional. There are hundreds of safe drugs on the market to handle anxiety. This will kill you.”

The two of you compounded an antidote for the medication. You tell Steve it’s vitamins. The little person in your head was frantically waving red flags at you. Not a good sign that he watched you take the pills every day. Not good at all.

🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞

The first time walking into Charles Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters was intimidating. It sat on a large expanse of land which was crawling with children. A few of the younger kids ran up to Steve marveling at him. “It’s Captain America!” They shouted. He gave high fives and pats on the head. Ororo greeted him at the front door.

“Captain Rogers. Nice to meet you. I’m Ororo Munroe. I am an instructor here and I work directly with Professor Xavier. He’s just finishing up a class. I’ll show you to his office.” Steve shook her hand. He was mesmerized by the crystal blue of her eyes.

“This is a cool operation you have here. Not unlike the Avengers compound except we only house adult children.”

“Trust me we have several of those ourselves. Tell me, the Professor said you were inquiring about a former student. I’ve been here for quite some time. Perhaps I can help.”

“Sure. Her name is Y/N Y/L/N. She’s working with us on a operation in Alaska. She also happens to be my girlfriend.” Ororo paused for a moment.

“Of course. How is she doing? Terrible what happened to her family. She was a great student. What kind of mission are you going on that you’d need that kind of fire power?” Steve stayed quiet until they were sure to be away from tiny ears.

“She’s doing well. Her power is what I wanted to talk to Professor Xavier about.”

A voice came from out of nowhere. It was gentle tinged with a hint of amusement. “Y/N is quite a woman. Your team is lucky to have her at your disposal.” Steve shook his hand and sat in the chair across from the large desk. Ororo and a few other X-men protectively flanked the Professor.

“She is, sir, though I may be a bit biased. The reason I’m here is because members of my team have expressed some concern about the strength of her power and her inability to control herself in times of great stress. She has been taking a medication called Aconite prescribed by a Dr. Calloway to help with stress and anxiety....”

A woman whom he did not immediately notice spoke up, “Aconite is Wolfsbane, Captain Rogers. It’s poisonous. It also strips powers. Why would she ever agree to that?” Based on your description Steve guessed this was your Aunt Agatha. The tension in the room grew considerably. He was unaware that he was poisoning you.

“You must be Aunt Agatha. I’ve heard a lot about you....” Steve stood to shake her hand when another woman interrupted.

“The doctor told her they are anti-depressants. I’m Jean Grey. Don’t get up, Captain Rogers. They lied to both of you. Stephen Strange will never agree to bind her powers. Not against her will. You people are unbelievable.” Steve’s jaw clenched. He ran his hands over his face and through his hair. The Professor saw him getting overwhelmed so he ordered everyone out except Agatha.

“Captain Rogers, Y/N is quite capable of controlling herself. There were a few incidents when she was younger but she’s come a long way. From what we hear she is doing quite well under Stephen Strange’s tutelage. Why bind her now?”

“I agree. There are those who don’t. I’ve read her SHIELD file. She killed a kid on these grounds under your care. For the safety of this mission we need her to be in as much emotional control as possible. We are working under SHIELD on this one so I’m afraid any details are classified.” He tossed the folder on his desk. Xavier and Agatha read over the incident report.

“This report is inaccurate. We were under attack on the day in question. As an older student she was charged with getting younger students to safety. This young man was too severely injured. He died in her arms. She was able to absorb his power of empathy. It took several months of therapy and training to cope with the gravity of this new skill.” Xavier looked away from him as he recalled the day. It was obviously very painful.

Steve grew more agitated. It was clear someone was lying to him and now he was an accomplice in poisoning you. He thanked the Professor for his time and decided to take the long way home to cool off. “Captain Rogers. Fear of our unique abilities is what started the war all those years ago. You need not fear what you don’t understand.”

“I love her, Professor. I’m not afraid of her. I’m afraid of what other people want with her. I’m not going to let anyone use her anymore. You have my word.” The only thing Steve wanted to do was get to Tony to find out why he was pushing so hard to bind you.

“Scott, find out what interest the Avengers have in Alaska. Why are they being sent there?” The Professor sent out a team to do some reconnaissance work. Perhaps the X-men would join the Avengers on their trip.

[iam-kenough]

Will  you ever notice me? Arthur Morgan x Original Female Character

Summary:  During they wandering in deep snowstorm, man from  van  der Linde gang found odd looking girl and Dutch decides to take her  to  camp to see if she can be any use, leading life of outlaw with  them.  Quickly, new girl develops feelings towards Arthur, but he sees  her just  as a kid...and she won't take that! It's an original character  story  that starts in the place where Arthur, Dutch and Micah were  supposed to  first meet with Sadie. Instead she's already with them.  

Authors notes: It’s another chapter and you  can find the rest of chapter on my blog if you want to read more of my  fanfiction. I decided to post all parts I have at once so the fic could  catch more attention. Word count: 2503 Chapter 6 Another few days passed and he felt better. Physically. Arthur's head on the other hand was mess. He couldn't start a conversation, he was just following Iris with his eyes, whenever he could. She seemed well now, eating a lot and enjoying her pretty dresses she bought herself being away. She looked different now or it was only his perspective that allowed Arthur to see Iris in very different light. And he secretly loved it. Her hair was bouncy and smelled nice, her eyes were like two emeralds, covered by dark eyelashes and her lips seemed so sweet and welcoming. He loved to look at her when she was chewing them while she was deeply in her thoughts. He just noticed that her pale, slim face was covered with freckles in very pretty way and that she had them on arms too. Arthur tried not to think too much of other freckles whereabouts. But he couldn't now. Now it was different. She was back, safe and it was such fresh and uplifting feeling. Her small breasts were always covered by her dresses, but he could see thru them. He was sure that her boobs would fit his hands perfectly. And this petite frame she has, waist so thin he could pick her up by wraping his arm around it and then those hips, perfectly proportioned. Long, long legs that could wrap around him while they would fuck.  Easy now, cowboy. He was lying under big tree and sketching when he heard footsteps. He looked up and saw Iris's face, sun covering her pretty head and making halo around it. - Mrs Grimshaw told me that I will wash clothes or I will hunt something to eat with you, Mister Morgan. - And you don't want to wash my dirty shirts, don't'ya? - I ain't no wife to do such things. Maybe Tilly accepts it but I won't. Wonder why this old rag doesn't do anything but screaming at me - Iris's eyes were throwing daggers towards lady she just mentioned - Anyway, I am ready whenever you are. She was wearing different clothes today and he liked them, even though it was jeans and shirt. He kind of wanted to say it but he wasn't brave enough. With bow on her back and braided hair she was riding her horse, humming some melody only she knew.  Iris was following Arthur, who knew better where to hunt in those location. Day was amazing. - What we gonna catch, Mr Morgan? Few rabbits? Maybe a buck? Or... - she giggled - A bear. We would have food for weeks from beast like this. - Pearson would make it uneatable anyway - he smiled under his breath. - That's why I'm back. Tell me the truth, you rescued me because Pearsons stew is poisonous, eh? Arthur couldn't answer. He couldn't not think what would happen to her if he wasn't lucky or damned enough to sit in the same prison as she. It wasn't funny either. - Sorry, Mr Morgan. Already forgot ya hate to talk with everyone around the camp. - I don't hate talking to you - was all he said. They hid in bushes and were waiting for anything big to come and drink from the river in front of their eyes. Minutes passed by and they haven't exchange any word, so Arthur started to sketch in his journal. Suddenly the piece of paper Iris left for him more than two months now fell from the last page of book. He wanted to catch it but she was quicker. - Ha! - she looked surprised, unfolding piece of paper but when she read it she looked rather dissapointed - Why would you keep it? Sure it belongs to trash now. And teared this paper apart into tiny pieces. Arthur got up suddenly. - Why you destroyed something that belongs to me? - He snarled, leaning in her direction. - It wasn't big deal, Mr Morgan, come on. Just some stupid things I wrote to ya. - So...It wasn't true after all? You don't think those things about me? Silence again. She started to sweat when Mother Nature decided to rescue her. Enormous deer with massive antlers was drinking from the stream. She didn't want to startle it by saying anything to Arthur so she grabbed her bow, inhaled and sent an arrow. It pierced deers eye as it whined and fallen down. Arthur looked at her amazed, forgeting  that they were falling out half hour ago. -Nice shot, Iris. Iris. That's my name. He never used my name before. - T-thanks I guess? Now we can head back so I won't bother you anymore, eh? - You don't bother me - he whispered but she didn't hear. She couldn't, she was already next to hunted deer. - You don't bother me - he said out of the blue when she entered the room they shared. It wasn't technicaly a room, more than a floor divided by old bookstand with their beds placed on opposite sides of it. But he could see her thru gaps in shelves as she sat down and begin to unbraid her hair. Suddenly he wanted to touch them. - Thank you, Mr Morgan, that's very nice of ya. - I mean...you really don't bother me. Ya said ya bother me ealier but ya don't. - Thank you again, I guess? - she shaked her head like she didn't understand why he was saying that again. - Ya really...don't bother me. I missed ya. - That's very nice of you, Mr Morgan. Mary- Beth told me she missed me too. I gues friends miss each other. Silence. - So you'd still consider me as yer friend? - You talk weird things, Mr Morgan. Why do you even care? We all are friends here, more or less. You saved my life, too. - S-say you like me like you did before - he bursted out, becoming all red. He hoped she won't use his way to look at him now, between dusty shelves. - I like you, Mr Morgan. - No, not like that - he got up suddenly, walking circles near his bed. - What d'you mean? - You said all those t-things to me, back then. I-I want to hear them again. Now Iris became silent. Why was he doing that? She cried enough and she spent really long time telling herself they gonna be friends and only friends. Her eyes became glossy so she closed them. - Tell me you like me, Iris - now his voice were much more clear and she heard him closer. She opened her eyes to see him sitting on the floor. - I just told you that. I like you. - Not like that. She got up slowly and sat in front of him. - Like what? - Like...back then. You know - his face was even more red than his union suit was - like you did when you kissed me. She blushed too as she put strand or her jet-black hair behind her ear. - I don't think I want to say them again, Mr Morgan. They was pointless back then and they will be now. I know I shouldn't fall in love with you, I know that and I'm sorry. - Don't be sorry...- he whispered and touched her cheek. It was nice and soft and also a little bit wet.   For his surprise she carresed back of his hand as he touched her. - I'm not sorry for loving you. I'm sorry because I shouldn't say it out loud back then. We would still be friends, robbing trains and killing men - she chuckled - Now it's awkward. - You...You think you still love me? - W-why you doin' that? Just stop, please. Yes, I still love you. - Say it again - he murmured as he inclined to her face. - I love you - she whispered, her body trembling. Arthur kissed her gently and slowly, but his touch was demanding. He wrapped one of his arms around her waist, the other one playing with her soft hair. She smelled so nice and she was warm and her lips were welcoming and she kissed him in that shy way like she never kissed anyone. Iris was kissing him like no one before. It was mainly fact that she didn't kiss anyone beside him in her life. She was trembling under his touch. He smelled still the same way she remembered -cigarettes, whiskey and sweat. It felt like a dream, unreal but sweet and innocent. She parted their lips and looked him into the eyes. - You're warm...and you feel like home - her voice was shy. He barely could hear what she's saying. Arthur cuddled her tightly, rocking her a little bit in his arms. Iris could hear his heart, it's sound bold and loud. - I wanted to talk to you, Iris. 'Bout everything - he scratched his chin again - I ain't good man and you should know it. - You are...we just have diferent criteria. He couldn't help but smile. - I don't want to hurt you, you know? I had girl like you, just as young but much more naive. She had a kid with me. Maybe I don't look like family man but I was looking after them, I brought my son toys but I guess...I wasn't around enough - his voice darkened and he sat away from her. He was looking at his feet while saying all of it. - One day I wanted to visit them and I saw the house empty, completly wrecked. Behind it there was two graves. Neighbours told me that some gang murdered Eliza and Isaac for 10 dolars she had. She let those words sunk in. Now it was easier to understand why Arthur was pushing her away. She furrowed her brows and placed slender hand on Arthur's arm. - I wished you would tell me ealier, Arthur. I would understand you better. He blinked looking at her like she was a ghost. It made her brows furrow again. - I expected you to at least yell - he mumbled out. - Why would I yell, explain. - 'Cause I ain't good man. I'm just not. I have too much blood on my ugly hands. And you? You are smart and clever although you are much younger. I feel even worse when I think about the fact that I won't probably give anything good to you but stress and more death and- - Could you stop there for a second - Iris asked rather harshly but she quickly reflected to explain. She put his big, calloused hand in her delicate small hands and smiled shyly. - What's done is done, Arthur. I can tell you loved Eliza and your son and that's what really matters. At least to me. It tells a lot about you as y o u, not the image of bad old Arthur you think you are. And those things about me? It hurts me to think you feel like that. But to make you sure you will bring good things to my life I can tell that already. For example, I will stop being cold at night. Then Iris pecked a kiss on Arthur's cheek. He opened his mouth and then closed them. His eyes blinked few times and he opened his mouth again. - I-I just don't get it, why would you choose me? You could have anybody, I mean look at yourself, girl! - It's not about anybody. It's about having someone who makes your heart jump, I can't believe you don't get it! I was after you for months, Arthur Morgan. He started looking at the floor again and he was sulking, oh like hell he was. - You know we can leave it just like that...if you are not sure about all of this. You could...you could tell me when you will feel ready? - Iris said finally. You gonna break my heart, aren't you? He nodded looking at his feet. He nodded. And once again her heart dropped and melted on the floor. This time she didn't picked it up. -He did what?! - Mary-Beth looked like she nearly lost it. - He said he wants to wait because he thinks his words didn't sink in. That I am blindfolded and that I'm gonna grow out of it. - No way he used this one. No. No. - Wow, I have never saw you in this state before. Ya sure it was me that he broke up with? - How could you tell something like that anyway? How could you propose this? You are worth much more than this and we were talking about it. - Jesus.  I guess I'm sorry, mother? - You are not gonna wait for shit is what I'm telling you. Screw it! Screw good uncle Arthur, you are I are women and if he's like that he will taste my anger. - I think you got carried away, Mary-Beth. It's not that bad, really. He just gave me little hopes at first and now I don't have any, you don't have to worry. - I will be loyal to you, my new sister. I can't believe how dirty he did you! You know what? Let me rearrange there and you will be living with us since now. - Gee, I really don't know what to say - she blushed - You are really great, I thought I was gonna sleep today under the trees. He snores like a pig - she said with sweet but ugly smile. -Come on, Mrs Grimshaw will understand why we stopped working. Let's gonna move you here! - she sang it like it was an opera song. She hadn't had that much stuff, just few books and clothes so moving her wasn't difficult. Arthur was in town now so Iris hoped she won't meet him. And she didn't. Evening came and Arthur still wasn't there. What else wasn't there war journal. She started having this small habit since she noticed Arthur doing that. - I think I left it upstairs. I'm gonna search for it and I'm gonna be back soon with you, my new roommate! Iris walked up the stairs and there it was. She left it under her bed. Slender fingers caressed journal's cover and she smiled a bit. Then she turned around and saw Arthur, standing in room entrace. - Ya leaving me? - he asked with pure sadness in eyes. - Just moving to girls tent. Nothing big, Mr Morgan. - Don't call me like that, I ain't liking it. Use my name, you was using it already - he looked at her like she was something slipping from his hands. - But this is who you are now, just Mr Morgan - she smiled brightly at him and it was the saddest smile he saw - Goodnight - Iris whispered and climbed to her toes as she pecked little kiss on his cheek. She disappeared in darkness walking thru the corridor and he looked after her hoping it was just a joke. 

[lifeandthoughtsofa21]

What are you doing?

There is a senior back then in my campus orientation days. He said, “Udah, pokoknya ikutin semua yang ada dikampus, manfaatin sebaik-baiknya, organisasi, kepanitiaan, semuanya. Ini ajang lo cari banyak temen, perluas networking, belajar segala macem softskills. This is one of the way for you to survive through all phase in college. Gue aja nyesel, kenapa dari awal maba gue ga nyobain semua ini itu. Kalo gue bisa maba lagi, gue bakal ikut tuh semua. Sayang waktu ya gak bisa diulang..”

-

-

Back then I didn’t really take those words by the heart. Just let it goes to my right ear, and goes in the left ears. I didn’t really understand what it really means tho back then. And now I do.

Back then in high school, I didn’t really have the chance to join and participate in anything. Being in the acceleration class, it made my mind very attached to things that is only related to school, academics, tests, and studying. I didn’t really have time and the chance to join any competition, to explore extracurricular activities, hanging out, blend with friends another classes. I kind felt like I didn’t really fit in that class from the very beginning. But I just gave it a go. It is what it is. I can’t walk out. I can’t change anymore thing. So I really had to study hard to adapt in the class. And my fellow students in that class are HIGHLY COMPETITIVE and TOTALLY SMART. If only you know how it feels. Till the day I graduated from high school, titled 2014 batch. I had to do school photoshoot, I had to come to the graduation day, I had to do final exam. And I had to do it all with friends I didn’t really know who. I came to school at 2012, so I actually had to graduate in 2015. It was a really strange moments to make memories and do something with people you barely knew. For me high school was hard. Not the kind of highschool I imagined it would be.

Jadi, gue lulus SMA dengan predikat yang biasa-biasa aja. 

Dengan memori yang biasa-biasa aja, gak begitu terkenang. 

Ask my friend, @andhikafebi and @pertiwipermata. 

They feel it too.

By the time I got to college. I had to adapt, again.

Having all those not-nice experiences in high school, I don’t know why, but it actually took me quite long time to figure out what I really wanna do and earn in college. In freshman until in the second year, yeah I’m just being ordinary student who just got into college. Participated in a two organizations and extracurricular activities that caught my attention, hoping that it’s gonna be the place where I belong to. But nah, it didn’t. It just passed by without leaving any remarkable marks in my heart. 

But then, about a year ago, there was my turning point moment. I realized that I was about to graduate from college in 1,5 years. I had achieved nothing, I had done nothing wonderful to fill my college memories. I had nothing to leave behind as my legacies. So I wrote a new year resolutions in a sticky note in my laptop. I wrote anything I wanted to achieve in year 2017. You wanna know what I wrote? Here they are, exactly as it is written in my notes:

- Intern at BI

- Intern at Lawfirm

- Exchange 

- Learn new language

- Do social activities

- Do competitions

- Do conferences

- Master degree scholarship

- Live life

- Get out of comfort zone.

Hahahahha, yeah that’s it. I literally wrote it. 

I am that one person who believes that high school and college years are the golden years. The Golden Years. Many golden opportunities, many golden chances are being thrown at you during those years. And it is up to you to take what’s being thrown, or not. Because I’ve already wasted my high school golden years, I’m not gonna waste my college golden years. Which of course, I just realized a year ago. Stupid indeed I am. 

In the middle of getting results, there is the process in between. I believe that process, is the one that makes you grow. Don’t get yourself too focused on getting the results, it is not the most important thing. The process where you are on your way to pursuing your goal is the most important thing for me. The process where you fail, where you make mistakes, where you are being let down, it makes you grow, sisters. Believe me it is. Life is not always gonna be as smooth as it looks. It has its rough road. I’ve learned that nobody will blame you too much (except parents ofc) and nobody will care enough whether you make it or not. They don’t. Cause the ones who responsible for your life is you. Don’t listen to what people say, they don’t give a damn about you, the only thing they care about is only themselves. So, do what you wanna do, pursue what you wanna achieve. Believe in the process. 

You may think, “Songong amat lo belom apa-apa juga sok nyeramahin orang..”

I know gue masih remah-remah roti di tengah rak roti indomaret. But I am still learning too. I am still on my way of achieving things I want. But it fells soooo gewd knowing the things that you share affect other people’s lives too. It feels hard, makes you wanna give up, but don’t. Just don’t. You’re halfway there. 

It’s okay for being slow. I am slow. People have their own time to shine. As long as you are willing to start and do something now. 

So, yeah, I am not busy doing things. Neither am I ‘sok sibuk’. I am doing what I love and thats the thing thats gonna help me prepare for a real life. 

Right now I am focused to seek opportunities for self-development, seek informations for master degree, volunteering activities. Trust the process, and don’t forget to enjoy the ups and downs.

Believe me guys, life has more to offer than just a 9 to 5 work. Has more to offer than just daily routines, traffics, formalities, and toxic companionship. Travel, explore new places. There is always something you get to learn from every new places, new stuff, new people, new culture. I also plan to do more travelling when I already have the time and the money of my own. From one or two travelling experiences I had, it makes you grow and be more understanding about life.

I wanna go to new places, new things, meet new people, learn new cultures. Before I settle down. Settle down at life, at work, at love, at place to live. That’s why I am trying to gather everything I can, then sort it out later and choose what’s really best for me in the present and the future. Settling down seems hard for me, since you really have to make the right decision on something that I think is gonna last forever. Find a partner who you really love and wanna spend the rest of your life with, work on a job you really love doing and make a good living by it, live in a place where you really feel the comfort and where you really belong to, and raise kids and family in the best version of yourself.

I don’t know. This writing is so raw, not grammatically correct, and not in a order.

There are so many things going on in my head, so many stuff and thoughts I wanna tell you but I just don’t know which one to tell. My mind jumps from one thought to another thought. It is confusing yet feels very nice knowing I have something in mind thats worth to tell. 

Oh by the way, 

If you ask me what am I doing right now, I’ll answer..

“Doing a step that’s going to get me closer to my dreams..”

See you guys later,

Meisy,

x.