#dream chapter magic. if u care

[acourtofquestions]

Rowaelin Chapter 41 Kingdom of Ash:

She'd rebuild it—what she had been.

Perhaps one last time, perhaps only for a little while, but she'd do it. If only for Terrasen.

Rowan swooped from the mast, shifting as he reached her side at the rail. He surveyed the night-black sea beyond them. "You should rest." She slid him a glance. "I'm not tired." Not a lie, not in some regards. "Want to spar?" He frowned. "Training can start tomorrow."

"Or tonight." She held his piercing stare, matched his dominance with her own.

"It can wait a few hours, Aelin."

"Every day counts." Against Erawan, even a day of training would count.

Rowan's jaw tightened. "True," he said at last. "But it can still wait. There are ... there are things we need to discuss." The silent words rose in his animal-bright eyes. About you and me.

Her mouth went dry. But Aelin nodded In silence, they strode into their spacious quarters, its only decoration the wall of windows that overlooked the churning sea behind them. A far cry from a queen's chamber, or any she might have purchased as Adarlan's assassin.

At least the bed built into the wall looked clean enough, the sheets crisp and stainless. But Aelin headed for the oak desk anchored to the floor, and leaned against it while Rowan shut the door.

In the dim lantern light, they stared at each other.

She'd endured Maeve and Cairn; she'd endured Endovier and countless other horrors and losses. She could have this conversation with him. The first step toward rebuilding herself.

Aelin knew Rowan could hear her thundering heart as the space between them went taut. She swallowed once. "Elide and Lorcan told you... told you everything that was said on that beach."

A curt nod, wariness flooding his eyes. "Everything that Maeve said." Another nod.

She braced herself. "That I'm-we're mates."

Understanding and something like relief replaced that wariness. "Yes."

"I'm your mate," she said, needing to voice it. "And you are mine."

Rowan crossed the room, but halted a few feet from the desk on which she leaned. "What of it, Aelin?" His question was low, rough.

"Don't you..." She scrubbed at her face. "You know what she did to you, to ..." She couldn't say her name. Lyria. "Because of it."

"I do know."

"And?"

"And what do you wish me to say?"

She pushed off the desk. "I wish you to tell me how you feel about it. If…"

"If what?"

"If you wish it wasn't so."

His brows narrowed. "Why would I ever wish that?"

She shook her head, unable to answer, and stared over her shoulder toward the sea.

It seemed like he would close the distance between them, but he remained where he was.

"Aelin." His voice turned hoarse. "Aelin."

She looked at him then, at the pain in his words.

"Do you know what I wish?" He exposed his palms, one tattooed, the other unmarked. "I wish that you had told me. When you realized it. I wish you had told me then."

She swallowed against the ache in her throat. "I didn't want to hurt you."

"Why would it ever hurt me to know the truth that was already in my heart? The truth I hoped for?"

"I didn't understand it. I didn't understand how it was possible. I thought maybe ... maybe you might be able to have two mates within a lifetime, but even then, I just ….." She blew out a breath. "I didn't want you to be distressed." His eyes softened. "Do I regret that Lyria was dragged into this, that the cost of Maeve's game was her life, and the life of the child we might have had? Yes. I regret that, and I wish it had never happened." He would bear the tattoo to remember it for the rest of his days. "But none of that was your fault. I will always carry some of the burden of it, always know I chose to leave her for war and glory, and that I played right into Maeve's hands."

"Maeve wanted to ensnare you to get to me, though."

"Then it is her choice, not yours."

Aelin ran a hand over the worn wood of the desk. "In those illusions she spun for me, she showed me variations on one more than all the others." The words were strained, but she forced them out. Forced herself to look at him. "She spun me one dreamscape that felt so real I could smell the wind off the Staghorns."

"What did she show you?" A breathless question.

Aelin had to swallow before she could answer. "She showed me what might have been—if there had been no Erawan, if Elena had dealt with him properly and banished him. If there had been no Lyria, none of that pain or despair you endured. She showed me Terrasen as it would have been today, with my father as king, and my childhood happy, and..." Her lips wobbled. "When I turned twenty, you came with a delegation of Fae to Terrasen, to make amends for the rift between my mother and Maeve. And you and I took one look at each other in my father's throne room, and we knew."

She didn't fight the stinging in her eyes. "I wanted to believe that was the true world. That this was the nightmare from which I'd awaken. I wanted to believe that there was a place where you and I had never known this suffering and loss, where we'd take one look at each other and know we were mates. Maeve told me she could make it so. If I gave her the keys, she'd make it all possible." She wiped at her cheek, at the tear that escaped down it. "She spun me realities where you were dead, where you'd been killed by Erawan and only in handing over the keys to her would I be able to avenge you. But those realities made me ... I stopped being useful to her when she told me you were gone. She couldn't get me to talk, to think. Yet in the ones where you and I met, where things were as they should have been ... that was when I came the closest."

His swallow was audible. "What stopped you?"

She wiped at her face again. "The male I fell in love with was you. It was you, who knew pain as I did, and who walked with me through it, back to the light. Maeve didn't understand that. That even if she could create that perfect world, it wouldn't be you with me. And I'd never trade that, trade this. Not for anything." He extended his hand. An offer and invitation.

Aelin laid hers atop his, and his callused fingers squeezed gently. "I wanted it to be you," he breathed, closing his eyes. "For months and months, even in Wendlyn, I wondered why you weren't my mate instead. It tore me up, wondering it, but I still did." He opened his eyes, and they burned like green fire. "All this time, I wanted it to be you."

She lowered her gaze, but he hooked a thumb and forefinger around her chin and lifted her face.

"I know you are tired, Fireheart. I know that the burden on your shoulders is more than anyone should endure." He took their joined hands and laid them on his heart. "But we'll face this together. Erawan, the Lock, all of it.

"We'll face it together. And when we are done, when you Settle, we will have a thousand years together. Longer."

A small sound came out of her. "Elena said the Lock requires—"

"We'll face it together," he swore again.

"And if the cost of it truly is you, then we'll pay it together. As one soul in two bodies.

Her heart strained to the point of cleaving. "Terrasen needs a king."

"I have no intention of ruling Terrasen without you. Aedion can have the job."

She scanned his face. He meant every word He brushed the hair from her face, his other hand still clasping hers to his chest, where his heart pounded a steady, unfaltering rhythm.

"Even if I had my choice of any dream-realities, any perfect illusions, I would still choose you, too."

She felt the truth of his words echo into the unbreakable thing that bound their very souls, and tilted her face up toward his. But he made no move beyond it.

She frowned. "Why aren't you kissing me?"

"I thought you might want to be asked first."

"That never stopped you before."

"This first time, I wanted to make sure you were ... ready." After Cairn and Maeve. After months of having no choices whatsoever.

She smiled despite that truth. "I'm ready to be kissed again, Prince."

He let out a dark chuckle and muttered, "Thank the gods," before he lowered his mouth to hers.

"You're my mate." Her words were a breathless rush. "And I am yours."

The world might have been burning around them for all she cared, all he cared, too.

"Together, Aelin," he promised, and she heard the rest of the words in every place their bodies joined. Together they would face this, together they would find a way.

Together we'll find a way, their mingling breaths, the crashing sea, seemed to echo.

Together.

[starlightdreaming]

Lucifer Morningstar x Reader! Ch. 4!

Fandom: Hazbin Hotel!

Content warning: more blood! *Niffty’s manic laugh* i guess maybe some comfort this time (not from Lucifer lol) also more angst but a smidge bits of it, also LONGESTT CHAPTER YET and small implications of Season 1: Ep. 2 of Hazbin Hotel. (not proofread)

Synopsis: after waking up in hell, you try and find help of any kind.

Further note: I LOVED WRITING THIS CHAPTER SMM U HAVE NO IDEA (sorry it took a while) ENJOY READING MORE THAN I ENJOYED WRITING I!!/! - ✨Lolo💫

Chapters!: Chapter 1 ✧ Chapter 2 ✧ Chapter 3 ✧ Chapter 4 (you are here) •<•)b ✧ Chapter 5

this chapters song is:

(optional but recommended to improve reading experience!!:!)

｡･:*:･ﾟLululuna･ﾟ:｡*:･｡

“Lucifer, do you want to play with the stars with me?” You ask him, him turning to you and taking your hands into his, him looking at you with loving and caring eyes, you looking deeply into his as well, “I’d love to!” He says, dragging you to the oak tree you had agreed upon to be your hangout spot from now on.

You both rolled into the grass together, told stories at night and used magic to display your dreams of creations, everything was perfect, he was perfect, everything felt perfect.

“I never want to see you again,” He snapped, “And I fucking mean it.” He says as he looked at you with pure hatred in his eyes, oh those eyes, once full of love now full of hatred. Your heart began to beat harder as it ached, ‘this whole mess was your fault wasn’t it?’ you thought as your breath hitched, staring at those eyes he gave you, oh how you never wanted to see them again but here you were. You tried to breathe again but you just couldn’t, those eyes were staring deeply into your soul, you just couldn’t find a way to breathe as you began to hyperventilate, your body felt frozen in terror as you stared back into those careless, dull, hatred fueled eyes, breathe, breathe, breathe!

You sit up quickly, coughing out golden blood before gasping for air desperately, coughing out again before regaining your composure, groaning from the metallic taste in your mouth, you looked down at your hand to see the lavender blue star Emily gave you, seeing that was your only comfort now, it was stained in gold blood as well as you winced in sharp pain behind your back, you look at your back to see a lot of damage was done to your wings, golden blood covered all your feathers as you can see the clear cut Sera did, she attacked your two middle wings as they now seemed split, it made your skin crawl from how horrible they looked, you then looked up to the sky, your stars were barely raining anymore stardust, trying to heal your injured state, they began to fade, if it weren’t for the sentient stars you made during the extermination, you don’t think you would have survived the fall.

You looked at your stars with a tired and weak smile before they could crumble away into dust, thankful that your creations saved your life, you then looked at your surroundings, seeing cities in the distance, followed with screams and cars crashing, you sat for a moment trying to endure the pain that was coursing through your body, you held a wing to ease the pain but all you felt was a wet liquid that now covered your hands, more blood. You needed to find help or something but who in Hell would want to help? Maybe you could try and find a place to stay or hide so you could focus on healing yourself, you didn’t have any attributes to regeneration, so you needed to try and find someone or something to stop the bleedings.

You recovered a bit of mana from resting but it wasn’t enough for you to completely focus on healing since you weren’t very good at it, you decided to try and finally get up but your body was so sore you stumbled a few times before you could manage to even stand, you slouched to your side, limping as you tried to walk out of wherever you even were.

You decided to try and seek help in the city, hoping there might be a blessed heart willing to assist you but just a precaution, you made a little bit of stardust and with Emily’s star she had given you, you made it sentient with the little bit of mana you had left, thankful for her gift and her warm comforting smiles.

The little star chimed to life, floating around you, it was your only sort of defense it wasn’t much but it can for sure pack a punch you wanted it to, you hugged yourself as you limped toward the city, a trail of golden blood dripping behind you as your wings dragged behind you. The lavender blue star floating next to you calmly.

Upon entering the city, you expected monsters and sinners to be in chaos but… no one was here. “Hello?” You called softly, walking into the city, the emptiness making you feel uneasy, the star chimed next to you for comfort, floating around you as it kept watch of your surroundings, “Is anyone here?” You called out again more loudly, “please, can anyone help me?” you begged, not receiving a single answer in the abandoned city.

You held yourself more tightly as you walked, leaving a trail of gold as you looked around, high and low, left and right, you’d hear a sudden noise but it the source or cause would be long gone before you could turn around, I guess it only makes sense seeing as you were an angel and it was extermination day to them, the lonely and uncomfortable silence made you feel like an outcast, something you were used to in a way but it still hurt nonetheless, tears formed from your eyes but you tried to not let them escape from how lonely you felt in your situation and once again, you feel completely helpless as you walked down the empty streets, the silence was completely loud.

You wiped your tears as you passed by stores, broken glass and blood, it really showed a difference between Heaven and Hell, it made you wish you were back in your bed for all eternity, it was better than the pain your were enduring currently. You passed by a store full of televisions, you looked at it- it being the only thing that was making noise in the silent city, you watched the screens as it showed a thin waisted lady in red, her voice loud and clear, “Greetings, my name is Katy Killjoy, here to discuss to you about last weeks extermination, after deep analysis and investigating, we can officially confirm it was canceled thanks to an none other than an Angel itself!” She says before it showed a video of you making it rain stardust in stars in Hell’s skies, dragging every exterminator back into Heaven, your eyes widened as you didn’t expect to be shown to all of Hell.

“And thanks to that, we now have more information about how our deadline is cut in half, down to six months! do you know what that means Tom?” She says as she turned to face him, giving him the chance to finally speak, “yes it-“ “it means we are completely fucked!” she shouts through the screen, your mouth agape from shock, Adam and Sera- despite trying to stop them, they decided to continue this meaningless chaos? the thought of Sera ignoring your words, your voice, it made your blood boil unexplainably, especially on how she tried to kill you behind Heavens back.

You were so frustrated and in so much pain because of her, it made you want to cry and lash out at her angrily but trying to kill her back, the thought of killing her made a smile crawl to your face but you shook that thought out immediately, it was not the answer. If you tried to use violence like she did, you were no different than her and that’s worse than the thought of her death. You snapped out of thought to look at the television again, it was another video of you, of how you fell from the sky, you stared in shock again, they really have their eyes on the skies don’t they? It was you falling practically to your death! but that made you realize, oh- they evacuated the city because you arrived.

That alone, made you realize how lonely you are now, no one was going to help you, familiar feeling eh? history just doesn’t seem to stop repeating itself with you. Your head began to ache as your stomach grumbled, all that stamina you had used was getting to you for sure now but there was nothing you could do, you didn’t have food, shelter or any help, there was nothing here in this place of damnation for you. You were pathetically helpless, at rockbottom, completely.

You wiped the tears that escaped, your lavender blue star pressing against your cheek for comfort, it chimed to you, trying to tell you something, you gave it it’s attention, floating toward the window full of televisions, “Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel, where all sinners are welcomed and redeemed, if you want to escape the extermination and get up into Heaven, please head to the building on the top of the hill in the pride ring.” A White haired woman spoke, with other figures who stood there and a glitched out man who was facing away from the screen which was quite concerning- but that wasn’t important, what was important was that they were willing to help and once again, that small sliver of hope reignited in you as you smiled to yourself weakly, you just had to go find that hotel, if they didn’t accept you then… maybe you could just live in a box? that thought made you shudder, not the box but the fact you would be out of luck.

You tried to find the hotel, quickly limping down the streets as you tried to find that said hotel, “Can you help me find it?” You ask your star as it chimed, swiftly floating up in the air, looking around, it wasn’t long before it went back down to you and started guiding you as followed, gold blood still following behind you, you tried your best to keep it together, try to make it to the hotel, it wasn’t much long as you panted heavily up the hill, once upon making it, you collapsed in exhaustion and pain, you sat at the door for a moment to recollect yourself.

It took awhile but the sentient star waited with you patiently and that was enough for you to get back up on your feet, you took a deep breath before knocking, stepping back from the door, hugging yourself in anticipation, shaking a little from exhaustion.

The door opened and you saw a tall blonde female, she looked down and gasped in surprise, “Welcome!- oh- oh my gosh, are you alright?” she says quickly, cutting her introduction off after seeing your terrible state, “Is… this the Hazbin hotel?” you ask politely and kinda desperately, “Yes, yes this is! do you need uh, do you need to come in for a moment? theres a trail of blood coming from you.” She pointed out with concern, “please.” You say weakly and nervously to the stranger in front of you, feeling completely light headed from the blood loss, you felt like you were going to faint any second.

“Oh goodness, just sit here for me okay? I’ll go get something real quick-“ she stammers before running back inside after making you sit and lean on to the door, you waited as you heard the same voice shout “Vaggie!” and “Emergency!” You rested your eyes as you leaned your head against the door, you began to hear static, and it got only louder the longer you had your eyes shut but as soon you opened your eyes the static disappeared, ‘that was weird’ you thought as the tall lady came back and immediately tended to your wounds with another person behind her, you backed away when the blonde tried to touch you, “Oh don’t worry, i’m just trying to help.” She says as she waited for your permission this time to tend to you, her smile was oddly calming and it let you give in as you slowly turned your back, allowing her to touch your wings, the purple female also assisting her, you winced in pain after some places they touched, a “sorry” escaping one of their mouths as they kept going, you all were silent the whole time before the blonde moved to sit in front of you, leaving the other lady to focus on your wings.

“My name is Charlie.” She smiled at you, reaching her hand out for you to shake, you looked up to her, her red eyes staring back at you, “Y/n.” You say as you took her hand to shake, “Nice to meet you, Y/n! Now if I may ask, why were you so injured?” She asked, you looking away, “Oh uhhh, I fell..?” You say not tell her the full truth, she tilted her head confused, “fell? fell from where?” she said confused, “Uhhmm, fromm.. Heaven?” You laughed coyly, as she gasped, “You’re fallen?” She says quietly, “I guess,” pausing now acknowledging that you were actually fallen now, “yeah, I guess so.” you finished, feeling a little ashamed.

“Vaggie, are you almost done?” Charlie asks as she looks over your side to see that she wrapped your last wing up, a tug was felt and you winced a bit, “Yup, finished.” She says after she tied the last knot, Charlie bend down to help Vaggie up before they both helped you up, “Thank you.. for helping me.” You say with a tired smile, your star bouncing on your head, “Oh who’s this little guy?” Charlie says pointing to the star that chimed, “Oh this one of my creations or like a child of mine, same thing.” You say as you put the star in your hand, “I could only make this one sentient because im so tired.” You say, your eyes obviously showed that to them, black circles and all, “Well we can give you a place to stay in the Hotel!” Charlie smiles as she walks in the building, you following after Vaggie but as soon as you stepped into the building, your exhaustion you endured collapsed all at once, making your face plant into the ground with a ‘plomp’

The stared at you in surprise, “Oh, she was that tired.” Charlie responds, walking up to you, “are you alright?” she asks as you just muffled a reply, “foof.” “Uh, what was that?” Charlie asks, turning you to the side, “food.” you say, falling back into place, “Oh, okay just one sec.” She says before getting up to running off, leaving Vaggie to watch over you, she crossed her arms as she stared at you, “So uhh, who’s dis?” A new voice spoke, “Fallen angel, probably same one from the extermination on the news.” Vaggie replied as someone spat out their drink of something, you didn’t bother to get up to look up who was talking, too tired to care, “the hell you mean the angel from da news?” the voice shouted as you heard something rapidly approaching your body but your tiny star pushed them back, launching whatever was going after you, “That thing just launched Niff across the parlor! why are you allowing angels into this place?” The voice shouts again, “Angel, look at her, she’s defenseless, well, except that thing.” she pointed to your star.

Your star stuck to your back, trying to move you but it ended up just dragging you across the floor as everyone silently stared, “Okay i’m back!” Charlie says with a plate of food, walking to you and giving it to you after your star dropped you to the floor again.

You raised your head, resting your arms as you ate on the floor, not caring who’s watching, she also gave you water and that made you feel all the more better, with something finally in your system you managed to sit up, looking up at your surroundings, seeing everyone stare at you in silence, “uhh, hi.” you say awkwardly, with a small wave, as one of then waved back at you.

“Are you feeling alright now?” Charlie asked as you nodded, “Yeah, I just really need to rest, if you would let me please?” You ask as she gave you a hand to help you up, you thanked her as you tried to pat down your tattered dress, it was completely stained with blood from sinners during the extermination and your own as well, “Maybe let’s get you cleaned up?” Charlie asks as she took your hand to help you up the stairs, Vaggie following, “We can introduce you to everyone else once you’ve recovered.” She offers as she guides you down a hall, taking you to a room that was themed with red and black, “you can rest here,” she says as she walks into the room, you following suit along with your star.

You sat on the bed before falling back into it, your sore body finally feeling that euphoric comfort of a bed for who knows how long, your small lavender blue star rested on your head as you stretched a little, feeling your muscles ache, it hurt so bad it felt so good, “Do you need spare clothing or anything?” Charlie asks, Vaggie standing at the front of the door to the room, “Yes, if you wouldn’t mind.” You say shyly, sitting up again, you weren’t used to such hospitality, “thank you.” You say genuinely, extremely grateful that you found this place in this upside down world, “It’s no problem, you just get some rest alright? Vaggie can you go get something from my dresser?” She says, Vaggie nodding and leaving the room.

“So, can you tell me what happened? about why you’re here perhaps?” She questions, trying to start a conversation in the meantime, waiting for Vaggie to return, “Oh.. that..” you say looking down, away from her gaze, “oh! you don’t have to tell me anything if you want to,” she says, seeing how your expression has changed, “no, its just- it’s kind of a lot? I’ll just cut it short.” You smile at her, waving off her sudden intrusion of a question, “long story short, I asked for for a job and my, err, ‘manager’ gave me one,” you say scratching your cheek, the thought of Sera made you itch, “it was the extermination and I was so shocked on how Heaven was allowing the people to slaughter, so I used up so much of my power to drag every exorcist back to Heaven, leaving a bit of healing, hoping some sinners would recover,” You say as you as you rub your shoulder, still feeling guilty about the lives you witnessed being lost from the angels attack, “I’m really sorry about that by the way,” you apologized on behalf of the angels, “I tried to talk to my leader and it just got.. messy.” you sigh, Vaggie walking back to the room with clothes in hand, Charlie held your hand into her own, making you look up her, her comforting and sympathetic smile made you feel at ease from your riled up stress and tension, “hey, its alright,” she says, trying to soothe your nerves, “i’m just surprised an angel actually went out of their way to stop the extermination, it’s a complete first for anyone in hell to witness,” She smiles again, “i’m really glad you did, it shows that maybe not all angels are as bad as they seem.” she finishes, Vaggie walking up to you both giving, putting the clothes next to you, on the bed.

Charlie stood up, taking Vaggie’s hand into hers, “We’ll leave you alone for now, feel free to join us when you’re ready.” she waves as she leaves the room, closing the door behind her.

You got up from the bed after she left the room, changing out of your tattered dress and robes, the clothes they gave you were kind of big on you, the shirt was maybe too big, it was like a short night gown on you but you weren’t complaining since it was comfortable, the pants didn’t even fit so you tossed them to the side along with your tattered dress, wanting to deal with it later, you jumped into the bed, sighing in relief again, you laid on your stomach as you hugged the the fluffy pillow, the coolness of the sheets making you feel relaxed, best feeling ever.

Your star chimed as it floated off your head again, it was telling you it was going to keep watch as you slept, that was enough for you as you quickly drifted off to sleep, hugging the pillow as comfort.

✧•✧•✧•✧•✧•✧•✧

“look at that one, it looks like a duck!” Lucifer says under the oak tree, pointing to the clouds that drifted by, “Yeah, it does!” You say in awe, “that’s cause I made it be.” he giggles, showing you his pure golden light in his hands, you admired it as you giggled as well.

He laid in the grass as he continued to stare at the sky, his smile was so pure and full of life, “I’m so glad you came into my life, Luna.” He says before looking at you with adoration in his eyes, you stared back at him with a sparkle in your eyes, sitting up next to him, “everyone in my life thinks i’m a problem and avoids me cause of that,” he vents, looking back up at the blue sky, “and ever since you came along, everything just feels so… right.” he smiles, as you continued to stare at him with doe eyes, “I don’t think I could ask for anyone better, you are the first person to believe in me and my dreams for so long and I don’t think I want to lose you,” he says, sitting up and looking back at you, taking your hands into his own, “ever.”

You smiled at him comfortingly, “I don’t want to lose you either, Lulu.” you say as you look back into his eyes, you both stared into each other’s eyes, the silence between you was calm and comforting, “hey I know!” he says, brightening more from an idea, “lets make a promise,” he says, leaning closer to your face, “let’s promise each other that no matter what happens, we will stay together, we will help each other out in the time of need.” he says, pulling out hand in front of you, his pinky finger out, waiting for you to intertwine your finger with his.

You look down at his hand, back to him, you smiled more, “okay, I pinky promise.” you say as you brought your pinky out to hold into his, you both stared at each other with admiration for one another before he quickly pecked your forehead, leaving a warm kiss, your eyes widening in surprise at the sudden gesture, “I love you, my Luna.” he says, you felt your face heat up as he gave you a closed eyed smile, it became silent for a moment again before you spoke, “what’s a love?” you ask, breaking the silence as he looked at you bewildered, going back to smiling at you gently, “maybe one day, you’ll understand.”

✧•✧•✧•✧•✧•✧•✧

Your eyes fluttered open, as you groaned from a nights rest, you laid there for a moment before sitting up, groaning from the soreness in your body, you rubbed your eyes as you looked around, beginning to remember where you were. Upon waking up, your lavender blue star chimed as you awoke, happy to see you awake, you put your hands together for your star to rest in your hands, “oh, hey there,” you smiled tiredly, as it floated down into your hand, your used a bit of your mana to make cosmic dust, feeding the little star as it began to glow brightly again, after feeding it, it went to rest on your hair, seeing as your aren’t completely defenseless anymore.

You say in the bed looking around again before turning to your dress, it wasn’t filthy or dirty anymore, it looked clean and new, curious, you shifted out of the bed and went to collect it, they must have cleaned this for you while you were resting, you smiled, thankful for that, seeing as walking around in a shirt and undergarments in public was rather… explicit and embarrassing.

You turned around in the, realizing there was another door in your room, you went to open it curiously, behind the door was a sink and a tub, a personal bathroom, you smiled about that, you can take a bath without any worries now. You went into the bathroom, locking the door, deciding to take the chance to clean the blood and grime that stained your body. You sat on the hem of the tub, your clothes and bandages discarded, you were now scrubbing yourself clean, trying to avoid your wings soaking into the water, after cleaning your body, you focused on your wings, trying your best to not make them sting in pain as much as they already did in the contact with water, you washed them carefully and delicately.

After your relaxing bath, you changed your set of clothes, careful to not hurt your wings that looked like an absolute mess, the feathers were everywhere but you didn’t really bother with them, you’d groom your wings when they were healed up enough, with that thought out of the way, you went to leave the room, walking past a dresser with a mirror, you halted for a moment, stepping back and looking at the glass, your reflection showing, your hair was absolutely frizzled, your eyes were covered with black circles, like you just put black eyeliner around your eyes, you looked like an absolute mess and thing is, you were, emotionally and physically.

You saw a brush on the dresser, you decided to try and brush your hair, trying to look a little more presentable, a small chair sat underneath the dresser, pulling it put to sit down, focusing on your tangles.

You sat the brush down, looking at your now somewhat more clean state, there was nothing to do about the bags under your eyes, so you would just have to let that go, you got up from the chair, pushing it back under the dresser and walking to the door, exiting the room.

You explored the vast empty halls, taking in the details the hotel had, heading down the hall to the lobby, recalling that Charlie said you could join them anytime when you were ready, when you turned the corner, you saw some of the demons gathered in the corner of the lobby, you stood there quietly observing the people who were doing their own things, after scanning around the room, you saw Charlie talking to Vaggie in the parlor, on a sofa, it wasn’t long before Charlie spotted you as well and waved, “Over here, Y/n!” she calls to you, getting up to walk toward you to the stairs, you smiled nervously as everyone’s attention turned to you as you walked down the said stairs.

“How are you feeling?” she asks after you took your last step down, “I’m feeling much better, thank you,” You replied with sincerity, “and thank you for your hospitality.” You say as you bowed a little in respect, “just to make sure,” a male voice spoke as you turned away from Charlie’s to follow the voice, “you ain’t here to kill us right?” a tall feminine male asks, approaching you. You were taken back by his question but it made sense for them to worry, seeing as angels were sent to slaughter the poor souls, “what? no, i’d never-“ you tried to explain, being cut off quickly, “seeing on the news, she was the one who stopped the extermination, I don’t think those are her ideals, Angel.” Vaggie deadpanned to him, defending you.

Charlie laughed awkwardly, “Before we go into details any questions or details, how about a few introductions?” She asks, seeing how the atmosphere quickly turned, she guided you to the parlor, calling everyone to gather around, “Okay, so we have a new uhh,” she pauses trying to think, “guest at the hotel,” She says pointing her hand toward you, you waving shyly, “This is y/n, she arrived here yesterday as we all know and saw but welcome her nonetheless.” she smiles, only you getting stares and glances, “And these are our staff and residents,” she says, showing you the other three that were there, “this is Husk! our bartender,” she pointed to a cat with wings, who only stared at the distance, unfazed, “this is Angel, who is our single resident aside from you,” she says, pointing to the tall male who only scrolled through his phone before smiling and waving at you, “this is Niffty.” she says, pointing to a short woman with one eye who was staring into your soul, she ran up to you quickly, “are you an actual angel? why do you have so many wings? do you casually just wear eyeliner like that?” she says, pointing out your darkened eye bags, intruding your space, you only smiled nervously at her, she was asking to many questions before you could answer them, “and lastly, this is Alastor,” she says as you look at a man covered in red she pointed at, you were surprised about the male since you hadn’t seen him at all until now, he looked at you with an intimidating and intense gaze, smiling at you, making you feel uncomfortable, “he is our facility host.” She says, clasping her hands together with a smile.

Alastor walked up to you with a cane and his hands behind his back before bending down slightly to greet you properly, “it’s a pleasure to meet you, dear.” He says, stretching his hand out for you to shake, his hands had red sharp like claws making you hesitatingly take it with a nervous smile, “pleasure..” you say, shaking his hand lightly, you got more nervous than before when you began to hear radio static coming from him, the same static you heard when you first arrived here.

“With that out of the way, I was wondering- since you’re an angel and all- what do you think about sinners and redemption?” Charlie asked as Alastor backed away, trailing off to do his own thing as Charlie began to speak to you again, “what do you mean?” you asked curiously, requesting she’d go into more detail, “Well as you see, I began this project a few days ago,” she says, sitting next to you, summoning a pile of paper before taking one in her hand to show you hand-made drawings.

“What I want is to save my people and I thought maybe if they were given a second chance they could be redeemed and go to Heaven,” she says as she points to the drawing but your mind trailed off as soon as she said, ‘my people’ “wait- wait-“ you tried to cut her off, “your people?” you asked, “uhh, yeah?” she answered, confused about your reaction, you then stared at her, noticing her facial features, red cheeks, white skin and blonde hair… Your heart began to twinge a little from the thoughts that began to bubble your mind, “What’s your name..?” You ask, hesitatingly, afraid to find your suspicions might be correct. “Charlie… Morningstar.” she answers, putting down the drawing to respond, your eyes widened as you leaned back from her for a moment before leaning toward her, “You’re Lucifer’s daughter?!” you shouted completely shocked and somewhat… hurt? You felt a pain that couldn’t be explained in your stomach.

“Yeah, my parents are Lilith and Lucifer Morningstar,” she states, answering the truth you tried to avoid for so long, you were just lost in thought as she began to ramble about then both, “and that is why they call me the princess of hell- oh, are you alright?” Charlie asks genuinely, seeing the hurt expression on your face, you snapped out of your thoughts as you shook your head, putting up a facade, “huh? yeah- yeah, I was just surprised, sorry.” you tried to exclaim, “I was just not told about any of this is all, y’know? since being in Heaven and all?” you tried to excuse, not really convincing yourself, Alastor gave a side eye to you, interested on how you were baffled from the mention of Charlie and her parents, “Where are,” you trailed off, hesitating to finish your next question, “your parents?” you asked, nervously.

Charlie looked away from you, thinking momentarily before speaking, “My mother has been gone for quite a while,” she says as she looks back at you with a tinge of sadness in her eyes, “she’s only been gone for like.. seven years now? but i believe she’s off on some sort of business trip,” She says as she tried to smile and wave it off like it wasn’t a big deal, “and my father… we don’t talk much.” she says as she hugs her arm, rubbing it slightly and awkwardly at the topic of her parents but to you, knowing that they don’t have much contact, it all just put your nerves at ease, you don’t think you could handle randomly seeing either of those two… ever.

You sighed, regaining composure, “sorry if I intruded on your personal life,” you apologize, looking at Charlie, “I uhm,” you paused, thinking if you should tell her anything about you, “you see, I used to be best friends with Lucifer,” you smiled, “and I am just happy to know that he’s alright.” You say with a half lie, you weren’t happy about him and Lilith, you never were and you never wanted to let him go like you did, like you had to.

Charlie smiled from surprise, “wait, are you Luna?” she asks, the name being said in so long, you felt rather uncomfortable with it, “I don’t really go by that name anymore but yes, I used to be..” You admit, trying to avoid saying the name yourself as it became more of a haunting of the past. She jumped in her seat on the sofa with a radiated smile, “my father told me so many stories about you when I was younger!” she says as she began to shake in happiness, “it’s so nice to meet you! I didn’t even know it was you!” she continues as she shook your hand suddenly, surprising you with her sudden enthusiasm, “he told me how you’re the daughter of the universe, the way you make stars and constellations align,” she began to ramble, “he even told me about the stars you make are always and are more beautiful than any other angel would ever create.” She smiles as she leaned in toward you with admiration.

You sat there with mixed feelings again, Lucifer said all this about you? the compliments she stated out made your heart flutter and you didn’t know why, surely he’d hate you by now after everything you did? the thoughts began to stress your mind and you just didn’t want to deal with them, you look down at the desk and remembered Charlies hotel project, so you decided it was best to change the subject, “I’m glad he seems to see me that way,” you smiled, “but how about you tell me about your project? I think we trailed off.” You stated, pointing to her drawings, she gasped as she picked up her paper drawing again, “that’s right! as I was saying before, I was thinking of maybe we could try and redeem sinners and try to bring them to Heaven! that way we can stop overpopulation in Hell,” she continued as you listened, taking a liking to her idea, “and if we find a solution to the overpopulation,” she says, bringing up another paper for you to see, “we can end all these exterminations and everyone will be smiling and happy!” she finishes as you smiled to her ideals, “So what do you think?” she asks as she puts down the drawing and looked at you eagerly awaiting your answer, “I actually think this is a great idea!” you say as you sit up in your seat eagerly, loving the idea of second chances, Charlie smiled more at your response as she squeed in excitement, having an angel finally agree on her passion project, “I’m so happy you believe in my cause!” she shouted in happiness, Vaggie smiling that someone else agreed who was the same as her.

“I was so upset when I found out extermination was allowed, it’s completely terrible as a whole.” you say as you leaned back into the sofa in distaste for the thought of ‘divine judgment’ amongst Charlie’s people, “So do I! None of them deserved what was given to them.” she says as she frowns, “I agree,” You say empathetically, “If you would let me, I’d like to stay and help with your cause.” You offered, Charlie smiling once again, “Really?” She asked with pure joy, “Yeah! I believe this could work!” You say with full confidence.

This made Alastor raise a brow at you and Charlie as he subtly listened in your whole conversation, he turned away with a ‘hmm’ as he thought to himself, he then shadowed up behind the sofa you and Charlie sat, nudging Vaggie away a little, “So we have a new staff member now?” Alastor smiled, Vaggie rolling her eyes at Alastor and walking around the sofa to sit next to Charlie, you blinked at him in surprised from his sudden join in on the conversation, “Yes we do!” Charlie says as she sat up, to gain everyone’s attention to announce you were now part of the crew, “everyone, everyone, I’d like to announce that we have a new staff member on our team!” She says as she points to you, they weren’t very enthusiastic as you had expected but not really expected them to but it really didn’t bother you since you preferred to avoid attention. Not to mention that Alastor had left the lobby before Charlie even began.

“We can discuss what you can do later,” Charlie says to you, before heading toward the middle of the lobby to pace around, “right now, what we need to do is discuss how we can try and bring sinners in,“ she began as Husk walked off to the green creepy area at the back of the lobby, drinking whatever green glass he held, “extermination is coming in six months instead of a year, it’s no big deal, just a little set back,” she says as a cat appears and follows her before jumping over to the sofa to sit next to you, you stared at it in surprise as it tilted it’s head at you, blinking its one eye and all you could process in your mind is- oh my stars its so cute.

You stared at the cat as it walked further to you, you didn’t want to move to touch it, afraid it might run off, she sat right next to you, you hesitated to pet it but it leaned into your touch and you never felt so much serotonin fill your body all at once, you pet her head gently as the kitty purred and you were squealing on the inside as you continued to pet her. You picked up the black cat, carrying her in your arms as you walked toward Charlie and Vaggie, “don’t you think if the next extermination deadline is sooner than expected, wouldn’t sinners be desperate?” you asked, while petting the cat in your arms, “yeah,” Vaggie thought, “maybe desperate enough to try and do anything to escape the extermination.” Vaggie spoke with a smile appearing on her face making Charlie gasp, getting the idea she was leading on, “this is the perfect time to recruit more sinners for the hotel!” she shouted, raising her arms in the air, you smiling as you thought the same as well, only to frown when the kitty jumped out your arms, feeling the world shatter again inside your soul.

“Cute idea and all,” Angel says, tapping through his phone, “but you really going to go out in all of this?” He asks, showing a video of demons screaming through the city with fire everywhere, “well, it’s not like people are just going to show up on our doorstep-“ she says before being cut off from a loud explosion, making you jolt in surprise, hiding behind Charlie and Vaggie.

Everyone ran outside to see what the ruckus was about, you following last, you weren’t sure what to expect being new in Hell and all but when you saw outside was a massive war machine and Alastor at the top of one of the hotels balcony, talking with the attacker who damaged one of the hotels walls.

Well, needless to say, your ‘first day’ in Hell was going to be quite the ride to your new step in your new fallen life but you couldn’t complain, it was much more freeing than it ever was in Heaven.

✧•✧•✧•✧•✧•✧•✧

TAGGLISSSTT YIPEEE:

@ag-cookiebat800 @meow-meowo @kyo-kyo1 @darling-may-i @pink-apples001 @sparkleyfishies @mollzaj @glowymxxn @hyperkaiperrose

thank you for reading!!:!/!

AMERICA YA :D

[strongheartneteyam]

Realize where you belong.

Pairing: neteyam sully x female!human!reader/female!dreamwalker!reader

Chapter 3

CW: angst, reader is a loner, reader works her ass off every day at the lab, fluff, neteyam being cute towards reader (even tho it still has weird vibes lol), mad jealous neteyam, TRIGGER WARNING for depression symptoms (such as being moody n having less appetite than the usual), stalking, obsessive and toxic behavior, also TRIGGER WARNING for reader mentioning the word “suicidal” in an internal monologue (she IS NOT actually suicidal, she just feels really sad and mentions the word. if u read it, you'll know what I mean)

Not proofread. I'll do it as soon as I can ♡ I hope it's a good chapter 🥲 & thank u to everyone who's reading this fanfic, who left a comment in the last chapter and, of course, to everyone who asked to be in the taglist I LOVE Y'ALL 😘💕💕💕

Chapter 2

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

Mother looking at me

Tell me, what do you see?

Yes, I've lost my mind

(...)

Will I ever be free?

Have I crossed the line?

All the things she said, running through my head

All the things she said (t.A.T.u)

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

You woke up feeling like crap that morning.

Your last shift had been so demanding. You had to cook just so much food that you started to wonder if there was anything left in the pantry. You had gone into that room just so many times yesterday to get ingredients and kitchen utensils, your legs felt heavy and sore now, as you stretched them in your small bed.

There were just too many people to eat in that damn laboratory.

Meanwhile you, the cook, barely had any time left to eat. There was always just so much work to do. So many dishes to wash, so many vegetables and meat to cut, bread to prepare from scratch... Your head hurt just thinking about it.

You felt so stressed out that you preferred to unwind a little instead of eating, sometimes. You would find a quiet place, sit somewhere, put your headphones on and press play on one of your many curated playlists or in one of your favorite songs. Listening to music seemed to work like a medicine to your wounds and, going to the cafeteria and having to socialize, to have people all around you felt too much, so, you just tried to avoid it. You even started to lose a little weight because of it. Nothing too much, though. You were only slightly thinner than you used to be. But in the back of your head, there was always a voice saying "Please, take better care of yourself...". Despite knowing that voice was right, you were too tired and apathetic to care.

Ever since you started to Dreamwalk, it was like your whole world had changed. That old life you led did not seem to be enough anymore. It never was, in the first place. It could never compare to the heightened senses you had when you were in your Avatar, helping you smell and hear everything better.

The first time you spent a whole afternoon running alone through the Pandoran forest next to Hell's Gate, you felt alive like you had not felt in years.

But nothing gold can ever stay. Way sooner than you expected, you had to be awakened from that magical dream. Everytime you came out of the technological machine you had to lay inside of to be able to drive your Avatar, you thought "Damn! Why wasn't I born a na'vi? They're so freaking lucky to have such an incredibly beautiful Planet to call their own. If only Earth was still as beautiful as it used to be..."

When you were not in one of your free days, you would always work until you felt exhausted and fed up with everything. It was not a walk in the park to be a cook. Even though you loved cooking since you were a teenager, when you used to always mix different ingredients and spices and create new recipes, this profession forced you to spend most of your time standing up and to have little time to sit and rest your poor fatigued legs. In some days, all you wanted was to sleep for 12 hours straight. And God knows you were capable of actually doing that.

Not a long time ago, you slept so much that, when you eventually woke up, it was 2 pm and you almost got fired from the lab when you finally showed up at the kitchen you were supposed to be in since 6 am.

You promised yourself you would never do that again. You just could not afford to lose that job. And you wanted to cry just thinking about not being able to Dreamwalk anymore. Exploring Pandora was the peak of your life, currently. It was when you felt high as a kite. As funny as it sounded, it was true. You felt euphoria run through your body everytime you got to have blue skin and be over 8 feet tall.

You liked to cook and was good at it, but, you were a smart, intelligent girl who knew much more than people thought you did. Unfortunately, you could not manage to get a higher position at the lab. Your forte was not sciencey stuff. It was subjects like Human History, Languages, Philosophy... At best, you got to use your language learning skills to learn basic na'vi fast and was able to get an Avatar from the lab. At least that was a good thing that your tiring job provided you. God knows that privilege was one of the few things keeping you alive. You goddamn hated you life, your job, everything... All your days seemed to be the same. Same chores, same annoying people... Most scientists did not try to hide that they did not see you as an equal. Even though they were always really polite to you, they would not let you in in their little groups, in their upbeat conversations through the laboratory corridors. You could count in one hand how many of them used to talk to you with genuine interest in hearing what you had to say.

You sat every day next to the less valued lab employees: janitors, cleaning ladies, other cooks just like you and so on. Your race had never been good at realizing the worth that these hardworking people had, anyway. Why would they do it now? You thought it to be so sad...

Those employees were nice regular people. Even thought some of them were idiots and treated you badly, there are people who behave like that anywhere. You were thankful that most of them were polite to you and treated you well enough. You also had a close friendship with one of the female employees, a cute, humble and really kind girl called Crystal. But she was your only actual friend. You did not remember the last time you had made an actual effort to make a friend, to be nice to someone in hopes you could get to know them better and they could become a part of your life. You had to admit you had been really grumpy lately.

You could easily blame such moodiness on your lack of will to keep living that life you currently had. It’s not that you were suicidal, it's just that you wished you could live a better life.

There was also Derek, the tall, cute boy you would make out with every now and then. You did not have a proper name for your relationship with him. He was always lovely towards you and you two would have really interesting conversations together and sneak around to kiss each other and do other types of heated stuff (though you never had sex with him) anytime you both felt like it. But it did not happen that often, anyway. You did not put much thought into it, to be honest. Derek was just a friend you would fool around with. You could not be farther from being in love with him or anything of sorts.

After another tiresome day, you walked fast towards your room. All you could think about was how nice and cozy your bed would feel when you would lay your body on it. Only five minutes after you finally laid down, you fell asleep. Slumber had been bugging you all day. Lately, it had always been like that.

They say you have to be careful what you wish for. That your words and thoughts have power over what happens to you. And you learned it the hard way.

In one of your infamous busy but boring afternoons, something unexpected happened to you.

Seemingly out of nowhere, a na'vi young man appeared outside of your glass window and tapped slightly on it. You almost choked on your own saliva when you saw that huge, blue creature staring at you with wide yellow eyes. A scream got stuck right in the middle of your throat, since you got so startled you could not get your vocal chords to obey the command your brain was sending them. What the hell was that na'vi doing in front of the laboratory? They did not use to come to Hell's Gate. And why was he looking at you through the kitchen window?

The na'vi boy just would not stop staring at you. His gaze was so intense it made you feel unbelievably uncomfortable. Suddenly, he pointed to the left. The big, ample door that led to the open area in front of the room you worked in was right at the same direction his four fingered hand was pointing to. You realized he was signaling to you that he wanted to see you outside of the lab.

You started to say, in your own mind: "What kind of weird situation is this?"

"Please?" You heard the alien plead in fluent English (he only had a typical na'vi accent), his voice coming through the narrow gap that existed between the glass and the window frame. His eyes reminded you of the eyes of a small kitten asking for food.

You got surprised by the fact that he was able to speak English. You wondered why he had learned it and who taught him the language.

You tried to reach for the door to try and inform someone that there was a na'vi around and ask if anybody knew who he was when you heard the alien say:

"Don't go, please! I just want to talk to you! I'm not gonna hurt you."

Your back was turned to him. When you turned around, he was smiling.

"It's incredible how you're even prettier up close."

"I'm sorry?!" You answered

"Oh, forgive me. My name is Neteyam. Neteyam te Suli Tsyeyk'itan. It's really nice to meet you." He was still smiling.

That name was familiar, Neteyam te Suli... Oh, of course! Neteyam was the son of the Olo'eyktan of the Omatikaya clan, Jake Sully. He was very famous between the na'vi and the humans.

Neteyam Suli was one of the most feared na'vi warriors out there. A great archer and very skilled with the knives the Omatikayas made themselves, he fought fearlessly against the recoms, including Colonel Miles Quaritch, an old enemy of his father. Quaritch used to lead the RDA soldiers when he was human, before being "revived" and given an Avatar body. He died in battle against the na'vi. But that did not mean that there was finally peace between humans and the na'vi race.

But why in hell was Neteyam Suli trying to talk to you? It is not like the na'vi liked the humans. On the contrary, they despised your race.

"Uhmm... okay. Nice to meet you..." You tried to be polite and peaceful towards the na'vi boy, like you were advised to be by your teachers, back when you were studying and training to get your Avatar "But I'm sorry, what did you say? That I'm prettier up close?" Your brows were furrowing, your face full of confusion. Despite all, you were calmer now that you knew you could communicate with him in English. Your na'vi was not the best out there.

"Yes." Neteyam's big amber eyes shone when he looked at your face. You were beyond dazed. "I've seen you before. Many times actually. But only from far away. It doesn't compare to seeing you right next to me." His voice had a weird warm feeling in it, like he was already acquainted to you. But how could it be? You did not even know who he was before he revealed his identity to you.

"When did you see me...?" Your mouth was slightly opened, so bewildered you felt

"Don't you wanna come outside so we can talk better?" He said, seeming excited.

"Unfortunately, no. I'm good, thanks." Neteyam looked sad after you declined his offer.

"Why not? I told you, I'm not gonna hurt you. I promise." He smiled faintly. You could tell he was hurt by your blunt answer.

It pained you to act like that towards him. You admired the na'vi so much. Damn, you even would choose to be born a na'vi if you somehow could go back in time, before you were inside your mother's womb and you could talk to Eywa herself. But how were you gonna trust him? There were some na'vi out there, his mother, for example, that hated humans with such a boiling passion. What if he took after his mother? You would be in trouble if he tried to kill you. Even though the na'vi were a peaceful by nature race, everyone has a limit, so, you had to be careful when interacting with them. You learned about all the genocide your kind had committed against his kind while simultaneously destroying his Planet slowly, in a cruel, despicable way. You honestly understood the contempt the na'vi felt when it came to humans.

You looked at Neteyam with honesty in your eyes and said:

"Please don't take this the wrong way but I can't really trust you. I know you told me you're not gonna hurt me, but, I'm still human. How can I know you trust me, to begin with?"

"I trust you because you're different. You're nothing like the others from your kind. You're more like my people. And I love that about you." Neteyam said, smiling at you.

"Can you please just tell me how do you know me? Because I've never seen you before. I've only heard about you because you're the Olo'eyktan's eldest son and Olo'eyktan to be. But you talk to me like you somehow... know me. I'm really confused, Neteyam." He felt his heart race when he heard you pronounce his name. Your voice sounded so sweet to his sensitive na'vi ears, making him move them somewhat to the sides. It was the same voice he heard in the forest, when he watched you talk to yourself saying how beautiful you thought some yellow, bioluminescent flower that you saw in the grass was.

"You're a Dreamwalker. I've seen you around. I love how much you seem to appreciate and respect my Planet instead of destroying it like the others from your kind do. That's why I think you're more na'vi than human." He chuckled happily and you got confused by his last sentence.

You had to admit he looked cute when his fangs escaped from under his upper lip whenever he smiled or chuckled. But you felt so weird thinking that.

"I'm more na'vi than human?" You were intrigued "What do you mean?" You laughed a bit and he continued on staring at you in an intense manner.

Neteyam heard footsteps approaching, so, he started to move just so he could hide. He did not want any other human but you seeing him. He knew he could not trust them as he could trust you.

"Wait! Where are you -" before you could finish your words, he was already gone.

The brown wooden door behind you opened and Derek appeared carrying a pile of plates in his arms.

"Hey, cutie." He walked towards the sink, leaving the dirty dishes there to be washed by himself when he would be back in the kitchen.

"Hi, Derek." You smiled faintly. You were still recovering from that odd interaction you had with Neteyam Sully.

Derek came close to your ear and whispered:

"Feel like meeting me tonight? I miss you." You sighed

"I don't know... I'm not really in the mood, sorry." You answered, uninterested

He got a little surprised by your answer and moved his eyebrows up, making wrinkles appear in his forehead but quickly remembered he had much work to do outside, so, he walked towards the door and got out of the room without saying another word to you.

Neteyam was still out there, next to the window, leaning against the wall. He was listening to the conversation the whole time. He had to use all the self control he learned to have with the years to not hiss when he heard that human call you "cutie" and ask if you wanted to meet him tonight. Who was he, anyway? And why was he saying he missed you? Neteyam had never seen you show any sign that he was your mate before. He had to find out what was going on. Neteyam would not let anyone get between the both of you. It would not be a weak human male that would be the obstacle that would make him give up on his future mate. He was used to challenges and was not afraid of another one. That would probably even be fun. Neteyam could imagine that tiny mate of yours shivering in fear when he showed him his big, sharp fangs.

Neteyam decided he was gonna find out who the hell that mate of yours was. He was sure he was not better than him. That human male would never be as strong as he was. That human would never be able to hunt fresh food for you, walking through the forests of Pandora and confronting big, dangerous animals, like Neteyam would. He knew he outbraved that human. He could never be a good mate to you like Neteyam could be. You deserved better than him.

༊⁀➷

Taglist:

@xylianasblog @samistars @crazy4books1 @nerdybouquetofkittens-blog @explosiongamora @lik0 @your-girl-mj @darktyrantwinner @xxunnie @sereisstuff @yeosxxx @die4niyahhh @henhouse-horrors @lala-1516 @iman-lu @manumanulau @im-in-a-pansexual-panik @hana-yuri

I tagged some of you that did not ask to be tagged but left really cute comments on the last chapter that made my heart feel warm 💓 if u don't wanna be tagged, just lemme know

Also, if someone wants to be added to the taglist too just leave a comment below saying that 🤍

[sadhours]

scumbag blues • battery acid

gator tillman x f!original character

previous chapter • masterlist

cw: 18+minors dni, unsolicited dick pics/videos, mean texts, drinking, kind of smut??? Gator tries

Daisy’s depressed. She’s been turning away clients left and right. The money from Roy keeps the bills paid but it’s tighter than before and her pops has noticed. Says something about it when Daisy’s cooking him lunch.

“I don’t know why things have taken such a turn, Daisy,” he sounds stressed. “We haven’t had a single guest in two weeks.”

“It’ll turn back around,” she assures him, “always does.”

Her mothers voice rings in her ears. Same mantra about how women have to take care of things. How women have a magic money maker between their legs and they’d be fools not to take advantage.

Her phone vibrates in her pocket, she pulls it out and looks down at the notification. Gator. Hasn’t had the guts to block him like she should. She slides it open and is met with a photo of his cock. Hard as hell. He’s on his bed, she can see his cargos bunched up around his ankles and his combat boots. He’s sent You can’t quit me, baby along with the photo and she hates the way it ignites a flame in her stomach. She locks her phone and shoves it back in her pocket, resuming the can of tomato soup she’d been heating up. She wishes Gator would just give it up. There’s plenty of other women for sale in this county. But she knows he likes her. Their sexual chemistry is undeniable. And she’s certain Gator hasn’t been with any other woman. Yet, she doesn’t even know how many men she’s been with. It’s unfair. She can’t quit this. And that’s what Gator deserves, so she’ll have to quit him.

She butters up the bread for grilled cheeses, determined to get out of this funk and start taking clients again. Her mother would tell her she’s pathetic. Gator’s always been a client, he started out as such and it’d be laughable to think they could be more. It’s a god damn pipe dream and they both know it.

—

When Daisy reads his message but doesn’t respond, Gator gets furious but his cock is still hard. The arousal mixed with the anger facilitates in a bit of harassment on his end. He records himself jacking off, mumbles about how he knows she wants him. How she’s gonna watch it later and play with her pretty pussy. Which he fully believes. Records himself cumming, muttering, “Wish I was cumming in your tight hole, baby.”

Again, Daisy opens the messages and doesn’t respond. And now that Gator’s cock is softening, the anger takes over and he sends a handful of messages.

Whatever, bitch. Ur not even pretty. Just fucking easy.

Ur used up.

Probably should get tested. God knows ur fckn infected. Nasty slut.

Fuck u bitch

Then, Gator realizes these won’t help his case in any way so he sends another.

I’m sorry. Just miss u and I ain’t good at controlling my temper

The last message never delivers and Gator’s feeling like a pathetic loser with his cum drying on his stomach. Cleans himself up and grabs his keys. He needs to get as drunk as humanly possible. Fuck, he doesn’t care that it’s only noon. This pit of dread filling him needs to be released and alcohol can dull it. The Esquire Club opens at 10 am. He’ll be with like minded company. And well, if it’s two blocks from the Inn, that’s just a coincidence. He isn’t hoping that Daisy’ll wander in desperate for money. Definitely not.

The place is dead when he gets there aside from a couple of dudes rambling about sports. Gator doesn’t keep up with football anymore. Too bitter about high school. He would’ve been scouted, out of this shithole and never would’ve touched Daisy Way if that prick hadn’t busted his ankle. Swears if he ever sees that fucker again, he’ll kill him.

The hours drone on, Gator filling his belly with cheap whiskey and countless beers. Is absolutely stumbling around when the sun goes down. There’s girls in here tonight. Ones that know Gator’s the sheriff’s son, girls that touch his biceps and ask if he’s ever had to shoot anyone. He tells grandiose stories, fibbing on the extremities. Yeah, he sees a ton of action. Yeah, Gator’s a fucking badass. He’s a fucking winner.

He gets one of the girls in the bathroom, a brunette with heavy makeup and a short skirt. Has her leg propped up on the graffitied toilet. Limp dick in his hand as he tugs it, pleading internally for it to fill out but it just fucking won’t. He knows it’s the whiskey, his whole body is fucking numb. But he can’t help but think that if this were Daisy bent over for him, he’d be hard as a rock. It’s pathetic and it’s weird, but he grabs hold of the girl's hair and tugs her head back so he can grunt into her ear.

“You want me to fuck you, Daisy? Huh?” he laughs, “Want me to stretch you out so bad?”

“My names not Daisy?” the girl replies, confusion dripping in her voice.

“Shh,” he hisses, pulling on his cock and focusing on the fantasy, trying to will his dick to life. Nothing. He balls his fist up and slams it against the stall, “Fuck!”

He shoves his flaccid length back into his cargos and barrels out of there. Leaving the girl stunned and exposed. He’s a fucking loser. If he goes by the Inn, it’ll be pummeled into his head what a fucking loser he is. Somehow, he winds up at Faye’s apartment building. Hits the buzzer. Over and over until he hears her sleepy voice.

“Who is it?”

“Faye, it’s me— er,” he hiccups, “Gator. Can I come up?”

“Gator, it’s the middle of the night,” she sighs, “I don’t think it’s a good idea.”

“Please,” he whines, hates how pathetic he sounds, “I have nowhere else to go. I won’t be fucking weird. Okay? I just… please, Faye.”

A beat of silence. Then the buzz and a green light. Gator tugs the door open and stumbles inside, looking down the hall until a door opens. Faye steps outside, rubbing her eyes and she’s wearing a long, flowy nightgown. She lets him inside and because of his intoxicated state, he clings onto her and fucking cries. Like the pathetic loser he is. But she wraps her arms around him.

“Gator, what happened?”

“I’m… I’m such a fucking loser,” he sobs, “I ruin everything.”

Faye squeezes him tighter, rubs his back soothingly. “Oh, Gator…”

She pulls back and puts her hands on his face, “I’m gonna make some tea. Sit on the couch and we’ll talk about it. Okay?”

She’s so good. So pure. So sweet. Gator hiccups and nods, moving to rub his fists against his teary eyes. Then he trudges to her living room, waiting for her to return.

[missalosa]

OPERATION: LOVE!

CHAPTER 1 - OPERATION: THE START

pairing: hwang hyunjin x fem!reader

genere: enemies to lovers, college au, social media au, texting au, slight slow burn? (idk man), get ready for WHIPPED hyunjin

synopsis: in a world where society normalizes true love, y/n feels like an outsider. surrounded by friends who are constantly dating and sharing romantic moments, she struggles with feelings of inadequacy and the fear that she will never find love. her insecurities deepen as she navigates college, believing that love is reserved for those who fit a certain mold, but unexpectedly, she finds herself in a fake operation plan with the popular guy of her college. will she get a glimpse of what everyone sought for? or will she forever be alone?

status: ongoing

started: 10.10.24

tags: fluff, crack, spicy stuff happens mostly later but idk how to write smut so u get what u get hornball (jk | love u)

────୨ৎ────

What is love?

It’s a question that runs through my head whenever I walk past a couple, hand in hand as they giggle in between themselves, content in each other’s presence.

In this world, love is everywhere, almost a currency. Every glance, every word exchanged carries a weight, a promise of connection. People chase it like a moth to a flame, hoping to be enveloped in that warm glow. But beneath the surface, the desperation simmers.

What happens when love feels obligatory? I watch as people pair off, their laughter echoing, yet sometimes it feels like a performance. Are they truly in love, or just fulfilling a role?

Can love be a burden? When everyone wants it so badly, does it lose its magic?

Sometimes I wonder that about myself.

I know I made that whole thing sound like I was alone in crippling shame, stuck in a well, but I do have someone. A boy. My boy.

I should be lucky I’m even dating someone, especially someone like Taehyung. He’s everything I wanted, and the fact that I was able to pull him is something that amazes me. But, I can’t tell if it’s normal or usual for people in a relationship to overthink, I guess so, but is it normal to do it frequently?

It’s not like he doesn’t comfort me, he tells me he loves me every time, and it never fails to make me fall in love with him all over again, but I just feel so..weird, almost as if this is just a dream. I was someone who thought I would never find true love, I thought I was unlikable. But the moment I finally find someone, finally get a glimpse of what it truly feels like to put someone’s values over your own values, I can’t find myself to believe it.

It’s a bit pathetic really, I’m afraid of something that I was always so curious for the moment I got it. However, I think me and Taehyung are doing well in letting each other know that we’re on eachother’s side always.

Well, I know he is. Even if he’s not that kind to me, that’s just how he is. He wouldn’t wait for me to finish eating my food before walking off with his friends, he wouldn’t walk me home a lot, and when he would, it would be with my sister.

Step-sister anyways, but I like to think of her as my real one.

Miyeon is younger than me, my parents promised to take care of her as well, they used to work in a foster care and saw the brightest in Miyeon, and I’m really glad they did. Even if she’s younger than me, I really still look up to her as if she’s older, even if she’s the exact opposite of me.

Miyeon is the absolute total package. She’s popular, has blonde hair, pretty body, pretty face, the definition of..just pretty. She’s smart, has a lot of friends, you would think someone like her would be slightly intimidating at first glance but..I think she’s like my twin, even if we really aren’t. After all, we’re still the same age, even if she’s a couple months younger than me. There’s one thing though..her friendship with my boyfriend.

Personally, I don’t find myself getting jealous easily, I have a lot of trust in Taehyung, so I don’t think he’d ever do something as cruel as cheating on me, especially if it’s someone like my sister, but, I still have my fears.

And this is the part where I definitely feel like I’m overthinking, Miyeon would be the type to hurt my boyfriend if he were to ever even think about playing with my heart, no matter how close they are. So I really shouldn’t be worrying about anything..right? I mean..maybe it’s just—

“Ack!”

My whole body suddenly jolted as I felt myself bump into someone else, causing my tray to leave my grasp, making a clattering sound as my food was now on the floor, dirtying someone’s shoes.

I stammer, looking down at my tray, as well as the person’s shoes. “..Ah..I am..so sorry uh..I didn’t mean to-“

“Are you fucking blind? Watch where you’re going next time will you?”

I snap my head up to the person who made the snarky comment, finally getting a look on who was it that I bumped into. It was Hwang Hyunjin, of fucking course it had to be him.

Hyunjin was one of the most popular guys of our campus. Like Miyeon, he had looks, except there’s a reason you should be intimidated by him. I rarely see him go to school, like ever, and it’s noticeable when he does, because everyone looks at him with heart eyes, following him and trying to talk to him like lost puppies. The worst part of it all, was that he didn’t care, he didn’t care for all the girls practically tossing themselves at him. I never understood the hype around him, it’s not like he’s ugly.

He is very cute.

But his nonchalant personality completely overshadows that for me, I can’t be with someone who doesn’t care. Well..Taehyung does care. That I know. However..this specific encounter that’s occurring is making me find my thoughts of him reasonable.

“Oh..well..I’m sorry..but..you walked into-“

He didn’t even let me finish my sentence before he scoffed, bumping into my shoulder, almost as if it was purposely, walking away with that bitchy ass walk. I felt like the cafeteria go silent, or at least not fully, but most of the tables around me were overhearing us. I almost got flinched from that shoulder bump that he did.

What the hell is up his ass?? I didn’t even mean to bump into him on purpose, he was the one who walked into me, he’s a giant, how the hell was I supposed to move??

I looked at him walk away in disbelief before I felt someone grab my shoulder. I look over to see that it was Yunjin. “Y/n? Are you okay? That really wasn’t necessary of him to snap at you like that.” She reassured me as she sat me down in the circle table with our group. Our group consisted of her, Keeho, Yuna, Beomgyu, and Yeonjun.

“Well that was definitely an impression.” Keeho said as he munched on his chips.

“I can’t tell if I wanna kill him or myself.”

“Both.” Beomgyu said, slightly snickering, Yeonjun who was next to him slightly raising his eyebrows. “Beomgyu, really?” Yuna responded from across the table, sat next to Sakura.

“Don’t worry about him, I think he’s always that rude.” Yunjin says, patting my shoulder gently.

“I really don’t know what others see in him besides his looks.” Sakura comments.

“Exactly!!” Beomgyu exclaims, causing some people in the table in front of us to shift their attention towards us for a moment. “Well someone’s passionate.” Yeonjun responds, causing Beomgyu to nudge his shoulder, muttering for him to shut up under his breath.

“Anyway..you have more relevant things to worry about..like your actual boyfriend. Did he respond to your text? What did he say?” Yuna asks eagerly.

I pull my phone out to check if I got any notifications, I even checked the message I sent just incase it didn’t send.

────୨ৎ────

────୨ৎ────

Delivered.

“Uh..no. Still delivered.” I felt a bit disappointed. But I remembered he doesn’t have the same lunch period as us, so he’s probably unable to reach his phone since he’s in class right now.

“Oh.” Yuna slightly mumbled, her voice tone shifted to something more blank as she pouted, she was expecting him to respond. “Well..that’s okay, he has class, right? He’ll probably respond later.”

She’s right, Taehyung may take a while to respond, but he never willingly ignores me, right?

“Girl I think he’s ignoring you.” Keeho asserted a bit too bluntly for my heart as he looked at his phone with slightly raised eyebrows.

“Damn Keeho, what’s that about?” Yeonjun commented, widening his eyes from the bold claim.

“I’m not just saying that, I texted him a bit after you did, and it only took him a couple minutes for him to respond to my message perfectly fine.” Keeho added.

“Let me see.” I grabbed his phone from him, looking at the screen showing their messages. Keeho texted him about practice, and Taehyung responded not even 3 minutes later. This wasn’t even long after I texted him.

I fell silent as everyone else tried to take a peek at what I was looking at, once everyone saw it, Beomgyu was the first to speak up.

“Bitch?” Was the only word he said afterwards, I was about to express my own concern before Sakura cut me off, raising her hands.

“Well, hold on, he’s probably not doing that on purpose. Maybe your message didn’t fully send? It could be bad reception or something.”

“If it says delivered, then it’s sent.” Yeonjun debunks Sakura’s excuse, causing me to feel even more worse.

Was it something I did? Is he mad at me? What did I do? I kept asking a series of questions in my head, growing more and more stressed at the amount of possibilities, is he gonna break up with me? Does he not wanna talk to me anymore?

It was almost as if Yunjin sensed my worries, and started speaking while putting an arm around my shoulder. “I’m sure you did nothing wrong, Y/n, maybe he’s just..uhhhh..” Love her for trying.

“Why can’t you just talk to him after lunch? You see him afterwards, yeah?” Yeonjun stated his idea, causing everyone else in our table to nod lightly.

“Only during passing periods, I don’t have a class with him.”

“Well, still, I think you should try talking to him. Once he tells you it will all probably make more sense.” Yuna adds, everyone nodding lightly again in agreement.

“Okay, yeah, I’ll do that.”

I eventually thought to just do it, I don’t think Taehyung would have any bad intention, maybe he responded mentally? I do that a lot. Maybe he’s just..waiting to tell me in person?

Whatever reason it is, it’s better to hear him say it instead of just assuming.

────୨ৎ────

After lunch, I usually wait for him under the stairs. His class was right near, so he didn’t take long. But, for some reason, 2 minutes passed and he still wasn’t here.

I tapped my foot anxiously, did he just..forget about me? No, maybe he’s coming out late, his teacher might be telling him something. Or maybe-

“Boo!”

I felt a breeze of air hit my ear, the feeling of that causes me to fully flinch, falling back.

I tilt my head up to see the man I was waiting for, Taehyung, laughing at me manically.

“You’re so funny, Y/n! You’re just so vulnerable, it’s so easy to scare you like this.”

I pick myself up, no thanks to him, cleaning the slight dust that probably landed on my skirt from pretty much falling on my ass. As soon as I look up at him he leans down to press soft kisses against my neck, it causes me to slightly shiver before I pull him back. “Taehyung, can I ask you something?”

“Mm, what is it?” He said in between kisses, apparently me pulling him away didn’t stop him from trying to devour my neck.

“You didn’t respond to my text.”

He doesn’t stop, no matter how many times I try to push him away. I was really trying to be serious with him but he just didn’t know how to.

“I was busy, in class.” He says in between kisses, he moved to my jaw, causing me moan slightly, but I managed to push him away before I continued. “You responded to Keeho, though.”

He stops his assault of kissing, looking down at me, the proximity between our faces made me shiver. “You know I don’t have to always respond to you all the time, right? Since when did you become so clingy?”

His words made my heart ache, clingy? He was the one literally trying to mark me down like an animal. “I..I wasn’t trying to-..”

“Look, I saw your text, I’ll think about it, okay?” He says, bringing his hand to pinch the bridge of his nose.

“You’ll think about it?” I repeated.

“I have practice after school.”

He really could’ve just said that, but the only thing I could mutter out was a “Oh.”

“I thought you would’ve known from your little guy friend.” He said that in a almost harsher tone.

“You really don’t have to call him that.”

“Why are you being so defensive towards him? Do you want him or something?“

“No, that’s not what I’m-“

“Okay. Okay. I’m sorry. I got a bit out of control there. I’ll see what I can do, okay?” He says rubbing my shoulders to reassure me, and damn I would be lying if it didn’t work every time.

He closed the gap between our lips as he gently pressed his lips against mine. His hands reached lower from my back to grip my waist as he pulled me against him, causing me to moan quietly into the kiss. He slowly lowered his hands, and when I felt like he was on the brink of groping my ass, I smacked his hands, holding my pointer finger infront of his face, causing him to laugh. “Hey, what did I say about doing that in school?”

He bit his lips, smirking at me. “It’s not like anyone can see us, but fine, I’ll control myself.”

He held out his hand to hold mine, leading me out from under the stairs. “We’re gonna be late to both of our classes if we don’t hurry.”

I smiled as I felt his hand against mine, something I don’t think I felt in a while.

He may be a bit rude sometimes, and some of his actions may be hard to explain, but I love him either way.

────୨ৎ────

[lunchtimebedamned1997]

Harrow The Ninth current progress reading thoughts (pt.2)

Part one | Here

Please no spoilers for beyond chapter 11 of book two, and none for book three please.

Spoilers for HTN and GTN below:

Chapters 7-9 (+prev chapters rambling):

HAHAHA GOD'S NAME IS JOHN AND THE SPOILER I GOT SAID THAT WAS GIDEON'S DAD'S NAME I WAS RIGHT!!!

Also Harrow being disappointment by and internally 'making fun' (as much as Harrow can in the state she's in, the poor thing) of God's name being John is so fucking funny to me. Like, I had the same reaction to the name John and his ownership of it, Harrow. I feel vindicated ty, girly. XD

I fucking love how Moira Quirk voices Harrow btw. I keep doing 'Harrow Voice' around the house now and it is far too fun. Also I miss Gideon give me my bby girl back and don't make her suffer too much!!! (She's gonna suffer so much, isn't she?) She [Moira] slips back into 'Gideon voice' here and there despite it being Harrow's perspective and I don't know if that's intentionallll ohhh my god WAIT I'm so dumb. Is the main section of the book in second person and leading with "you" because it's not just Harrow??? Bc she's a Lyctor and technically not just one person anymore???? Fuck that would make so much sense. Bc when Harrow is having dream/delusion time, it's back in the third-person format of the first book, which would work so perfectly with this train of thought since, in those delusions, Harrow is just Harrow. In a world without Gideon. God, if that's why, that is such a clever use of formatting and makes me appreciate the use of second person. (Which I usually do not like at all. In fact, usually, actively hate XD)

I just got to the part where we find out The Saint of Duty is also named Ortus?! And Harrow promptly passes tf out??? I fucking love this series haha (Which means I've just finished chapter nine as I type this note woop woop!)

I really am just feral for Harrow to open more of her notes and - OH MY GOD RIGHT SHE KISSED IANTHE?! XD I know it was to check that she hadn't cut out her tongue or removed teeth to sever the pact and that she had to be 'discrete' about it (oml) but holy fuck I'm cackling at the memory. I cannot believe Harrow kissed fucking Ianthe triden-fucking-tarius before she kissed Gideon or that stupid creepy ice woman!!! I'm cackling at the absurdity.

Though - I mean, Gideon dying by killing herself to save Harrow (and Camilla), and like literally doing so, to send her soul to live inside of Harrow??? They skipped the U-haul and went to fantasy soul-fused martyrdom XD (I'm using Martyr here even though it's wrong bc I'm typing this at 3 a.m. and I can't think of a better word for this rn - and this series is dripping with religious stuff soooo idc rn (I so do. It is actively bothering me)) (it's now 8 p.m. the following day as I'm editing this and my internal thesaurus is still failing me woops XD)

Why is Ianthe fucking here bro - I don't hate her but I certainly don't like her, and I'm neutral in my experience of not liking her so... IDK Ugh. They're probably going to make me attached at some point and then kill her.

I do like that Ianthe seems to be genuinely worried about Coronabeth's whereabouts. It's nice to see her care for something (someone) other than herself. I know her Cavalier was insufferable, but she killed him with so much coldness! Honestly, I suppose the more I think of her, the more interested that I am. I don't think I fully grasped the reveal that Coronabeth wasn't a necromancer at the end of the last book? Why on earth - metaphorical earth i suppose - why on any planet would your family want you to pretend your twin is also magical? Was it for appearances? Was it to keep her sister safe from their family? She managed to delude everyone into believing it the entirety of book one??? Just how powerful was she before Lyctorhood. How powerful is she now.

She seems to at least have less cognitive resolve than Harrow - if not less power overall - considering Harrow could use theorems in The River... but perhaps that was more Gideon's influence on Harrow's power than her own? They don't seem to be very integrated at the moment - especially with Harrow's falsified memories? But she is a Lyctor so idk. Mercy seemed flabbergasted by it.

I also did want to mention that I liked the detail that Delusional!Harrow was glad her eyes 'hadn't changed much' bc Ortus and her had similar, black ninth-eyes. Why does The Body have Gideon's eyes. Why does the body give her advice. Is Harrow crazy (you know, clinically not just... Harrow XD) or is she truly being haunted?

I'm actually really enjoying having somewhere to sort through some of my jumbled thoughts as I read! Especially with a book series like this that has so many moving parts - many of which I'm sure I've only gotten the barest scrap about - I've probably missed quite a few tbh.

It's fun getting to meet some more of the surviving Lyctors, and it was really interesting to hear about Cytherea a bit from their perspective, and get a bit more of the very ancient timeline sorted.

Bro I've been listening to the audiobooks and I feel like I'm in an Olympic obstacle course looking up all these names while trying to avoid spoilers. I fully expected Cytherea to be spelled Kithrea and Gideon's last name to be Navv and not Nav. etc. etc. Also though Ortus' name was Aughtus - I did not hear that 'r' XD My brain also keeps deciding that Magnus and Abigail are Maximus and Annabeth???? I don't have any clue why. This is what happens when you give a visual learner an audiobook I suppose.

Also did Ianthe kill Silas at the end of the last book when she became a Lyctor? And his Cavalier? I fully lost track of whatever happened to those two. I'm going to have to go back at some point and re-listen to that whole Ianthe section.

Chapter 10:

It was really nice getting to see Magnus and Abigail, even slightly-odd Harrow-skewed dream versions of them.

Magnus's eye's being 'a color that was suddenly hard to define' and asking Harrow "is this really how it happened?" is fucking haunting bro.

Also poor Ortucs, let that poor make-believe baby be a scribe XD It was also interesting how much his agreeableness aggravates Harrow. It's such a nice, jolting ache for her and for us. How hollow and absent her life is without Gideon. How much it lacks color both literal and metaphorical.

Oh. Ohhhh my god, I need to be paying more attention to the 'crazy' notes in the dreams, don't I? Implantation?! Of Gideon mayhaps?

She has a very physical reaction to seeing these notes as well, her eyes 'almost strobing' at the sight of it. Like it's something that does not fit into her carefully-crafted false reality. Something like Gideon. How Gideon or Gideon's soul or essence or whatever would have any idea of things pre-conception, I don't know. But this is all made up, so who's to say, right? I suppose it could have to do with Harrow as well, given dream!Abigail's comments about the soul-price hovering around Harrow. Even if the notes are not quite so literal, I'm sure that they don't mean nothing. Especially because Ortus, the literal manifestation of Harrow's rewriting of events - can't read it, refutes it. Surely they must mean something. Who knows, maybe it's about the girl in the ice.

The fact that Harrow, or at least, falsified-reality-dream-Harrow, has never eaten a potato is absolutely tragic (I type, while eating Gnocchi, feeling quite mocking towards our potato-less girl, despite no intention to.) Though, I wouldn't put it past our Queen of Misery to decide in this falsified reality, to deny herself the existence of potatoes in the Ninth. Just to make herself that much more miserable XD

Also LOL to even dream Ortucs being like "Bro I'm so glad this wasn't what I ended up to be" like, poor dead mama's boy. I actually feel kind of bad for him. Born in the wrong house to the wrong family at the wrong point in time, huh? Sorry your ship blew up, pookie. But like, also maybe try zoloft or vitamin D, babes, you're really bringing down the vibe - and like, the vibe is quite literally dead with all this necromancy so... that is really saying something sweetie. XD

I've wondered a couple times if the woman in the ice has anything to do with Gideon specifically, like being her mother - bc there's technically no proof thus far (to my memory) that the dead woman who carried Gideon in the life-support container was actually her mom. Wasn't Gideon only an hour old when found? All of this is so funky. I'm thinking so many things you guys sshashohaowihaoij Could the woman who brought Gideon to the Ninth have been taking her 'back to her mother' if there were time-shinnanigan things? Like if she was born or stillborn ages ago - or removed from the woman in the ice w/o really being born and god put her into the resurrection sleep or or or. I really just don't know. Fuck, I'm so curious. Idk I feel like I'm grapsing at straws here, but I was right about God being her dad and that felt just as insane at the time XD Also, fr though, WTF is god? Like, tell me.

Chapter 11:

HA - hahaha XD Ohh my god. Gideon saw Cythrea's dead body from Harrow's eyes and went "fuck you, bitch, die again.", huh? XD Not Harrow using the sword in her blackout even though they're not fully integrated. You cannot convince me that wasn't our precious Gideon being so very herself lmao

I wonder if it's Gideon like... directly, or if it's more of an echo of her final purpose in regards to her sacrifice? I imagine Harrow blacking out around that whole section is bc she's not integrated with Gideon (and can't even let herself remember the reality of her LMAO)

ONTO ACT TWO!!! WOOP WOOP!

[squash1]

THANK YOU FOR ALSO LOVING GREYWAREN that book made me go from slightly obsessed with this whole little universe to being VERY obsessed, and I suspect I'll never stop being a menace about it <3 it did THINGS to my psyche

i know u just said some favorite scenes from greywaren, but as a fellow lover of that book, I just have to know: what are some other things u really love about it?

THANK YOU FOR ASKING. FINALLY. SOMEONE ASKING THE IMPORTANT QUESTIONS

declan lynch autistic child core. as a child i was exactly like child declan and it warms my heart.

jordan and declan are the best couple and if anyone tries to say they’re not u should shut up. (i love all the couples equally but i love them more).

hennessy is so fucking funny like what an icon. her hatred of pennsylvania is so special to me. i don’t even hate pennsylvania i just admire her commitment to the cause.

the thing with declan’s moth. enough said

also declan and adam bonding and (this is mister impossible but whatever) meeting up to have a Ronan Lynch Support Squad Consultation….yes.

THE MATTHEW-BRYDE DYNAMIC. “YOU ARE THE SADDEST DUDE IVE EVER MET!”

the juxtaposition of niall and ronan in the chapters at the barns. aghhhhhh. and the glimpses into niall’s past like…..i wouldn’t call it a redemption arc but the careful way he is humanized WITHOUT being redeemed. and seeing what ronan saw in him. but also what declan saw

DECLAN LYNCH GANGSTER ERA

on the seventh day the lynch brothers became friends again. BECAME FRIENDS AGAIN

but basically. if trc is a coming-of-age series where you see these kids delighting in and struggling with the magic on the edge of adulthood. the dreamer trilogy is like the loss of childhood innocence. cdth and mi are ROUGH at points. it’s much harsher feeling than trc, more heavy and sad and action-packed and suspenseful. and greywaren is like…the tentative peace you make at the end of the transition to adulthood. ronan’s finding his feet, seeing old friends, proposing. declan is settling down, letting go of his childhood wounds. it’s not an ending really but it’s where things start to be okay. and that’s how it feels. and that’s why (for all the plot holes and rushed pacing blah blah blah) it’s so. fucking. good.

AND CAN I JUST SAY. all the ppl who say that post-TRK pynch became “bad” and “toxic” and “isn’t as good as in trc” and “they shouldn’t be together anymore”……..i hate those ppl w my whole heart bc. i’m sorry, but if you read the scene in greywaren where their, like, celestial soul energies found each other in dreamspace and reconciled and apologized and forgave (in. disembodied dream soul form…whatever) and WERE WANTED THEY WERE WANTED THEY WERE WANTED and decided to love and help and heal one another and you STILL think that???? i just don’t know how to help you!!! sorry u can’t enjoy mature healthy relationships where people have gone through bad periods and so the relationship suffered for a while and then they recalibrated and decided to continue to grow together, but i’m built different :))

[nawoken]

5.C: Hey hey!!! It's me, your friendly cat from outta space :3

Today it's still some rambling. About Lilia, cause I'm a simp.

I only play TWST Global server so most of the information I have is from Spoil so there might be something not true, please correct me if that's the case.

We know that Malleus put everyone into their dream realm, where they can live the life or have the thing they want. Sebek, Epel, Rook, and Vil's dream show it really clearly.

But Lilia's dream is different, he dreams about his past. Right before the turn of his life, before Maleanor dies, and before he has to take care and hatch Malleus's egg.

And, when the time came, he didn't even dream about changing the past, to save Maleanor, having a future where she is alive, defeated the human force, successfully hatched, and raised Malleus like Sebek used to think about.

For me, this means that Lilia is truly happy with his life like this and he doesn't want to change anything about it. He is sure about his decision and he doesn't regret anything. Even when he lost his magic and decided to leave... Maybe for him, he has lived his fullest so it is okay to let things go as it is and accept his fate.

~~~

5.C: This is just my speculation based on my experience. About not wanting to change my past part. My life is never the best, but I don't ever want to change it since I'm afraid that I will lose my friends along the way. :"D

~~~

But, why does it have to be the past, right before Maleanor...? Maybe because it's also the milestone where his life changed to a whole new chapter. After that, he learned that he was capable of love, took 200 years but he successfully hatched Malleus, then Silver, and a lot more. Many things happen and it is memorable for him.

At some point, Malleus has to accept this, he wants everyone to live their ideal life. But for Lilia, he already lived that life, without the need of dreaming.

~~~

5.C: ...Sorry but my literary score is not that ideal so there are a few things I can't actually describe in words. But I hope u guys get the idea. (:D)

:")))

5.C: I'm at the time when I crave some good angst so feel free to recommend fics, hcs, or anything. I will eat it with blood (not actually) and tears.

Have a nice and happy life!!!

Love u all~~~

[borathae]

ok finally doing this after a nap

Chapter 3

What is wrong with me *me 24/7, ALSO YES WHAT WAS ALL THAT???

Ever since you set foot into this estate, your brain went into a total frenzy YES EXACTLY AND it seems like she can remember hmmm

Why does everything here look so ancient? YOU NEED TO READ FANFICS to learn to live (except we dont get lucky yn parts just the unlucky embarrassing parts but thank god we aint dying every 5 chapter like yn)

You remember drinking one glass of wine. the said glass of wine:

It is totally normal to forget your date’s name after sleeping in his guestroom never been on a date, but i forgot someone's name after sitting next to them all day and realized after class while talking to bestie and had to wait till attendance next day -_-

ok the door is still locked. he told her to keep them locked and she did, but opened it for a sec and locked it again during the night. and the entire teleporting happened. this is a bit confusing hmmm. like opening it for a sec caused the change, but she locked it again. then how did they get her inside again? the bruise is there so it means it was real. the lock must have some magic and opening it during night causes it to go away?? i will think later lol

Did you punch your own throat in your sleep oof

Why did he know where to look exactly it wasnt a dream babe

istg im about to bitch slap this bitchless dude (TAE I LOVE U DONT TAKE IT TO THE HEART)

You should take better care of your belongings Kim Taehyung damn

He creeps me out honestly speaking all of them are creepy, yoongi is 10% less

just like that all your worries are wiped away like magic. like magic or with magic 👀👀(were u silent or silenced)

your knees are buckling like crazy THIS WILL BREAK ME THIS IS GONNA BREAK ME

Okay not going to lie, this was kind of cool you know whats more cooler??? jimin feeding his cycle 😂 THAT REMINDS ME OF JIN RIDING THE CYCLE HANDS FREE *fans myself

You snort, “so very humble.” ikr sOoOo HuMbLe

hmm usually you see cats sitting on horses, chilling. yoongles must be a rare kitty

Tell me again, why are you studying?” seriously dude must be bored as fuck to study, or started to forget cuz its beeen toooo looong

hold on what if some old being makes some theories and is "killed/disappeared" and later, with a different identity, studies his own theories in college 😭 and continues with it lol

It earned you a scholarship, it clearly must be well written.” or was it something to bring her to them??? 👀 *sus

The entrance exam stole my sanity from me. Even after a week of completing it I still felt jittery.” what type of students go there? what type of university is that? very weird

sunlight was just too bright for his eyes, DONT BE AN UNCULTURED SWINE, THATS WHEN UR SUPPOSED TO TWITCH AND SAY I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE

Emma left, she won’t come back again EMMA DIED FOR SURE OOF

It was a clean and painless end whats that supposed to mean mr.dracula?

Taehyung was a man of such humour ikr him in interviews 😭

Taehyung knew such peculiar stories about places and that doesnt seem weird???

the rain part was soo cute it could me giggling and listening too still with you

wow the honesty was cool, though there is many secrets, some parts feels really raw.

we are both pick-me girls then BAHAHA PLS *starts playing pd48 pick me

they are so cute im gonna die

(the way i started slightly mad at tae and then ended up simping, sighs)

THEY ARE GONNA HAVE ANOTHER DATE YIPPEE YIPPEE YIPPEE

i cant wait for 2seokkook's pov and her talking to them woohoo

i love how smoothly its written, like everything just flows nicely, the scenes and dialogues, its like those nice cozy well directed movies that you watch with pillows and blanket and rested face, body and mind

its only been 3 chapters, obviously the suspense wouldnt make me grip my pillow yet but its already made me clutch my blanket/pearls lol

jjdafjs it took me so long to figure out how the wine pic happened HAHAHA this is such a funny idea help fjadjfs 😭😂

What is wrong with me *me 24/7, ALSO YES WHAT WAS ALL THAT???

ISTFG WHAT IS GOING ON IN THIS ESTATE???

Ever since you set foot into this estate, your brain went into a total frenzy YES EXACTLY AND it seems like she can remember hmmm

like the suspicion is growiinnggg

Why does everything here look so ancient? YOU NEED TO READ FANFICS to learn to live (except we dont get lucky yn parts just the unlucky embarrassing parts but thank god we aint dying every 5 chapter like yn)

it doesn't make sense to you yet probably but I wanna be SA!OC so bad jfasdjf

It is totally normal to forget your date’s name after sleeping in his guestroom never been on a date, but i forgot someone's name after sitting next to them all day and realized after class while talking to bestie and had to wait till attendance next day -_-

girliepop me all the time, I forget names so easily (the same with song titles FAFAJDS like I kid you not I even forgot BTS song titles sometimes like it's so bad)

ok the door is still locked. he told her to keep them locked and she did, but opened it for a sec and locked it again during the night. and the entire teleporting happened. this is a bit confusing hmmm. like opening it for a sec caused the change, but she locked it again. then how did they get her inside again? the bruise is there so it means it was real. the lock must have some magic and opening it during night causes it to go away?? i will think later lol

hmhmhmhm interesting theory indeed mhmhmmh or perhaps 👀 someone made her lock the door again and then think everything was just a dream 👀 mhmhmhm

You should take better care of your belongings Kim Taehyung damn

"belongings" LIKE THE ICK

He creeps me out honestly speaking all of them are creepy, yoongi is 10% less

JFJADSJF YES jhfahsdhf I agree fjadjfa

just like that all your worries are wiped away like magic. like magic or with magic 👀👀(were u silent or silenced)

INDEED LIKE WHAT IS HAPPENING TO HER???

Okay not going to lie, this was kind of cool you know whats more cooler??? jimin feeding his cycle 😂 THAT REMINDS ME OF JIN RIDING THE CYCLE HANDS FREE *fans myself

omg hahahaha this scene 😭😭 he is such a goof I love him 😭😭 Seokjin is honestly so hot I need to inhale him

hmm usually you see cats sitting on horses, chilling. yoongles must be a rare kitty

*cries* he is indeed a kitty

Tell me again, why are you studying?” seriously dude must be bored as fuck to study, or started to forget cuz its beeen toooo looong

LMOAOAO FOR REAL LIKE FADHF couldn't be mE FJASDJF

hold on what if some old being makes some theories and is "killed/disappeared" and later, with a different identity, studies his own theories in college 😭 and continues with it lol

👀 interesting ohohooh

It earned you a scholarship, it clearly must be well written.” or was it something to bring her to them??? 👀 *sus

OOOOOH IMAGINEEEEE 👀👀

The entrance exam stole my sanity from me. Even after a week of completing it I still felt jittery.” what type of students go there? what type of university is that? very weird

IT IS INDEED VERY WEIRD ALL OF IT 👀

sunlight was just too bright for his eyes, DONT BE AN UNCULTURED SWINE, THATS WHEN UR SUPPOSED TO TWITCH AND SAY I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE

lmaoaooaoao in her defence I have really sensitive eyes too and can barely stay in the sun without my eyes ACHING jfadsjfj so it IS possible

Emma left, she won’t come back again EMMA DIED FOR SURE OOF

👀 mhmhmhmmh

It was a clean and painless end whats that supposed to mean mr.dracula?

LIKE HELLO WHAT DID YOU DO TO HER????

Taehyung was a man of such humour ikr him in interviews 😭

I love him 😭😭

Taehyung knew such peculiar stories about places and that doesnt seem weird???

kfadjsfasj she is just here for a good time not a long time lmaooa

wow the honesty was cool, though there is many secrets, some parts feels really raw. they are so cute im gonna die (the way i started slightly mad at tae and then ended up simping, sighs) THEY ARE GONNA HAVE ANOTHER DATE YIPPEE YIPPEE YIPPEE

fjadjfjad I love how you switched instnatly JFJADSJF THIS IS SO ME WHEN SANGUIS TAE FJADSJFJ

i love how smoothly its written, like everything just flows nicely, the scenes and dialogues, its like those nice cozy well directed movies that you watch with pillows and blanket and rested face, body and mind. its only been 3 chapters, obviously the suspense wouldnt make me grip my pillow yet but its already made me clutch my blanket/pearls lol

gaaah thank youuu <3 I'm so happy that you're having such a good time with it heheheh istfg I love reading your comments, they're so awesome heheheh ����😭💜💜

[fg083nrt]

What ships from Naruto do you like, except Kakuhida? I'm asking out of curiosity :)

Also your art makes me want to eat tables!!! RAAH!!!!! (/pos)

This is a surprisingly loaded question because I have so many and some of them span for almost 20 years now.

Also, as usual, disclaimer, since I've seen all the ship wars and holywars, THESE ARE ALL PERSONAL OPINION. PERSONAL OPINION ONLY.

(endless yapping below the cut)

In the past:

My first ship when I was 12 was Pain/Konan, and I think that was the first smut I've ever read like period. I was a big cheerleader of Hinata and Naruto/Hinata because I liked that Hinata just minded her business and stayed in her lane while everyone else was going thru shit (Team 8 had the best work-life balance, I think, they just clocked in and clocked out, no shenanigans). Obviously, Temari/Shikamaru and I loved Neiji/Tenten. I think as a kid these were like really fun dynamics. Once the anime reached the Akatsuki I was all over the Akatsuki LMAO.

But now, as a grown adult, I am almost 99% just KKHD, and Akatsuki ships are like the default absolute truth to me, but recently, I've been obsessed with more Naruto Yuri.

Love Ino/Sakura for that double-income spy who owns a secret flower shop/doctor dynamic; it's just nice. Like I am a firm believer that they could have solved their differences by scissoring or something. Also like, I think their backstory is like an insane missed opportunity (but what's written cannot be unwritten, so whatever) because these pages made me feel like I was reading some kind of josei backstory. Like, go ahead and read these pretending this is not from Naruto, and tell me where do u think this could be from.

Like "pussy from a girl who treats you like a small stupid animal (good until psychic damage hits)"

Like, I would be like, this is either a shoujo manga, or the next page is older Sakura crying in the kitchen with a photo of Ino or something, and then by the end of the story, they, like fuck in the field or something while Sakura is like "I can't believe my toxic female friend from school has 4 fingers up my pussy!", but this could just be projecting, but I still like the ship. On a serious note, Sakura being a crybaby who was picked on would have been a fun opportunity to play with her character and create more empathy for Naruto within her, but her role was more like tying the two characters together, which worked well, but lots of people were salty, but it pushed people to support her character more so it evens out.

Tsunade/Shizune is like my next super fave, especially after rewatching the Tsunade arc. Tsunade's character is just so well done when it comes to how people cope with grief by doing destructive things, I loved it; Kishimoto is fantastic at mature story beats like this weaved between magical ninja fights. But yeah I loved their dynamic like Shizune is essentially her attendant/pet girl/assistant who is extremely loyal to her, but also nagging in a way and also Shizune is just very animated and kinda dorky while Tsunade is a calm mommy- sorry a mature rich woman of status who needs to be taken care of (nearly blacked out writing this). Their back and forth is just chef kiss, too. Honestly, I think that's my favourite Naruto arc; the first part of Naruto is great when it comes to mundane details that I now have more appreciation for.

Their auntie banter!

GODDDDD THAT WAS SO LIKE IT HURTS SEEING OTHERS LIVING THE LIFE YOU DREAM OF

And obviously still love Temari/Shikamaru! I loved that Shikamaru was always very tsundere and going on about how much he hates girls, but deep down is actually like, "Me when a bad bitch tells me to do anything." it's a satisfying way to play with his "character flaw". Seeing him go soft on Temari was like a mini character arc within his already happening character arc during Sasuke's pursuit, like we saw him grow up twice, great stuff!

The entire chapter 235 is just an amazing growth for Shikamaru in elevating the like "men/women" way of thinking to like "what makes a person who they are" way of thinking I really love that. The character is also a great reminder for those afraid of failing btw.

Kakashi/Iruka is my fave, 50% from a historical standpoint; the fact that you can find Kakairu fanfic on Geocities from 2001, and I have some doujins in my collection that are more than 20 years old now is fascinating to me. Love how incredibly loyal the Japanese fans are to Iruka; these guys were holding onto hope for so many years till the Pain arc and then, boom, Studio Pierrot's final Naruto arc!!! It's just incredible fandom history. I love that kinda stuff, love the ship itself too, it's very homey to me, some of the legendary fic they had was fantastic, like entire book's length, incredibly loyal fans.

[viilpstick]

Barbs sweetie-

I need Yuuna content >:(

Like is there stuff you changed from the OG game?? What does she become when she grows older?? Does she have parental figures from staff?? Hobbies?? ANYTHING?!

KEHSJAUXJWHXJWJNS OKAY KKAY LET ME ANSWER THOSE QUESTIONS TO U😭😭🙏

1- I don’t think she changes anything on the game (that likes tragically affects everything around her + story) mostly just her relationship with Vil. Of course I add into the story but nothing changes the end. at least for now, I still haven’t decided if I want her to vote for Neige or not, probably not and then I will explain why. But anyway-

2- Yuuna becomes an interviewer and journalist! :3 She always had GREAT intrapersonal skills and after finally healing her inner child that she doesn’t need to copy people, she can finally show more of them ^^ (Bonus: One day she was waiting for Vil to show up in basically the red carpet, and when he does he pulls her for a kiss, in open television and everyone saw- Save to say, they had a few edits going around for the next month)

3- Divus Crewel, the fact that Yuuna is magic-less gets Crewel RLLY interested, and the more he notices simple details, like: Yuuna likes to have a vest on because according to her is comforting and also makes her look more professional. Gets his attention, he then becomes more protective over her, he makes Crowley help her around genuinely more. And every time after an overblot he will RUN to where she is checking if everything is okay. With time (around chapter 3 to 4), Yuuna stops mirroring Crewel and starts acting like her own person around him :(( Which he notices and gets comfortable to help her out around (safe to say, Crewel may have brilliants and less troublemakers students, but Yuuna will always be his favorite, she is like a daughter to him)

4- Her hobbies? Writing and reading, she is a girl who loves daydreaming, fantasies and dreams coming true (ignore the fact she loves horror books as well) so she always has a good book with her around. Another bonus, when she is with Vil, awhile he is testing new products, she will be reading the book. Their quiet quality time <33

5- ANYTHING ELSE???? YOU WANT MORE/j A sad fact now, Yuuna’s younger brother died. And btw when he did, her parents during the whole week until the funeral treated her like absolute SHIT. She would have to do everything, they would tear her up apart, make her cry silent as she screams for help. And before you wonder, nope, this never happened before. She was mistreated and miserable bc of them, but NEVER at this point. Anyway, her brother died bc when she was in school, he was playing outside and his parents weren’t paying attention, he got hit by a car. When she comes home after school and hear the news, she is crying, they didn’t seemed to even care about it. She runs to her room, and cries awhile humming the lullaby she used to sing for him, and if you wonder, the lullaby is “You’ll be in my heart”, yep. The Tarzan song. <//3 Live with that now. (bonus, again: this is why she is so fucking attached to Ace and Deuce, they are just like her younger brothers. And when they find out that whole story, they start seeing her as an older sister as well)

(@midnightmah07 wanted u to see this as well)

[dragons-and-dwarves-are-nice]

To the Shadows that Cry Witch /// Chapter 4

Hi! I'm finally back from holiday which means I have access to my computer again! This one was a bit difficult to write, considering I'm so overly careful I hardly get injured. If you think it needs anything adding to make it more realistic, just let me know in the comment section or via message. Anyways, hope you enjoy!

Summary: So uhhhhhh.. magic’s real. Middle earth’s real. Shit goes down. Bon appetite.

Tags: Kíli x oc/reader - Fíli x oc (POV to be written soon) - Thorin's company x ocs/reader (platonic) - fluff - angst - SUPER slow burn - crack - Bagginshield

Word Count: 2230

Warnings: Swearing, Blood, Minor Injuries, Major injuries (i.e. broken bones)

Taglist - comment or message to be added!

PLEASE START FROM THE BEGINNING IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY OK LOVE U

Want some background music? Check out my Soundtrack Playlist!

Now available on Wattpad and AO3 (please let me know if links aren't working)

&lt;; Chapter 3 // Chapter 4 // Chapter 5 >

PART 1: Chapter 4 -

Hey ghouls, the girls are here.

Alternate Universe (definition): A hypothetical self-contained plane of existence, co-existing with one’s own.

I felt nothing and everything at the same time.

Each of my senses were heightened as I tried to make out what was happening, though there was nothing to make out. I opened my eyes to pitch black, straining my ears for even a single sound only to receive nothing but an empty void. It was as if I was floating in the middle of a sensory deprivation tank, where time slugged by in slow motion. A dream where you wanted to run, but your limbs were made of lead and only dragged you down further.

Frustrated and frightened beyond belief, I floated there for what felt like a thousand lifetimes, trying to reach for something, until slowly but surely, I could feel myself tilting backwards, or upwards, to be honest I don’t think direction even existed right now. Soon enough I felt myself descend, the sound of air whistling past as I seemed to descend quite rapidly, gaining speed to the point where the air became a deafening roar in my ears. Where I was falling to I had no clue of, but it was better than having a panic attack whilst magically suspended in a void.

A voice. Well, it wasn’t really a voice, more like screaming. I mean, I was screaming too, but I knew I wasn’t hearing things. At this point I wasn’t really worried about who was making the ruckus, I could be falling to my death after all. The only thing I comprehended was that they were falling too.

I had enough. Panic attack No.2 just finished, and I was still falling?? At this point the initial fear was now replaced with boredom and irritation at my predicament. I was even tempted to go to sleep, you know, make up the hours, and hopefully wake up to find I had already landed. But I knew I couldn’t doze off, everyone knows I’m too picky about my sleeping arrangements, and it’s always an hour minimum before I actually fall into any form of slumber. I still closed my eyes in some form of attempt, and relaxed as much as I could. I no longer had any concept of time. It felt like it had been hours when it could’ve easily been mere minutes.

Whether it was good or bad luck, I still felt the relief at the change of atmosphere. The air became significantly fresher, and I could almost see the light trying to pierce through my eyelids. The sound of thunder wasn’t very promising, though, and my relief didn’t stick around for long, packing up its bags and sprinting out the door the second I opened my eyes.

I ignored the fact that my throat was already painfully sore from earlier and began my screaming match again. Only this time wasn’t with the void, but with the dark clouds and the rapidly approaching ground below me. I hastily spotted I was going to hit a tree before coming to a possibly fatal landing on the grass, so I did all I could think of. I reached behind me, moving my rucksack as quickly as I could despite the aerodynamics, from my back to my face, wrapping my arms around the bag and curling my legs into me to prevent injuries as much as possible.

It wasn’t long before I hit something. Hard. And another thing. And another. All the while I was scratched and whipped by twigs all around me. A short moment of falling again passed, until I slammed into the ground with a loud thud. A deafening shriek ripped through my throat, wailing as agony shot through every part of my body. Despite the evidence of magic existing, it seemed no mercy would be given since something, if not several, things felt very broken. I forced my eyes open through the torture, blinking rapidly as rain hammered at my face, light filling my vision for the first time in what felt like forever, even if it was only dim.

Forcing the bag off me, I rolled over in the sodden grass, letting out involuntary cries of anguish as my body trembled from both the excruciating pain and freezing temperatures.

 Managing to roll onto my front, I tried my best through this nightmare to kick in my first aid training, to figure out just what parts of my body had the misfortune of baring the worst of the impact. My head was lucky, the bag only letting it receive a few knocks. My torso, not so much, with my painful breathing telling me a few ribs had definitely cracked.

My left wrist was completely trashed, seeing as I could hardly move it as it already had begun to turn red and swell up. However, as if by some miracle, my legs were intact, albeit a bit sore and with some definite bruising, not to mention the twisted ankle.

Thanking whatever kept me alive, I used my right arm to push myself up, trying not to twist too much to save myself from slipping over in the wet mud and tormenting myself further. I carefully retrieved my bag and shakily cradled my left hand to my chest. Only then was I able to finally take in what was around me.

Blinking through the rain that was collecting on my lashes, I saw it was like I was back in the forest, though it looked like something out of a fairy-tale. Twisting my head around, I observed that I was in some sort of meadow, filled to the brim with flowers of every colour. Perfect for frolicking in if it wasn’t pouring with rain, and also if you haven’t just fallen from the uppermost atmosphere. It was bordered by a darkened forest of oak trees, with possibly the most vibrant, dark green leaves I’ve ever seen. A pond, I guessed was about ten metres across or so in diameter, was tucked in at the edge, between the border of flowers and trees. It was also daytime, albeit still dark and grey, from what I could make through the hammering rain.

Taking shaky breaths, I peeled wet strands of hair from my face whilst trying to ignore the blood mixing with the water on my arm. I took a minute or so to calm down as much as I could, trying my best to focus on my surroundings as I tried to get the dizzying pain and cold turn from sharp jabs into a dull throbbing. Though I wasn’t able to get that far.

Because today decided that what I had endured wasn’t enough and sent me another lovely experience.

The screaming I had heard from the void returned, though I knew it definitely wasn’t me this time, with it now coming from above, and it was gaining on where I was very rapidly. Squinting up through the raindrops hitting my face, I scoured the dark grey sky above me. From out of the corner of my eye, a figure fell past in a blur, and my head twisted in its direction, despite the developing ache in my neck, as the sound of an object hitting water filled my ears. I watched in shock as the once still pond crashed around in violent waves as whatever hit it sent water flying high into the air, soaking a vast area of the meadow.

Dropping my bag, I pushed myself to my feet with a wince and hopped over as fast as I could, coming to a stop on the slippery edge of the pond. I watched as it kept churning and splashing, and I realised the figure was most definitely drowning.

My lifeguard training flashed in my mind and I jumped in. The adrenaline now pumping in my veins blocked me from feeling most of my broken bones as I wrapped my arms around the mass of flailing limbs, quickly dragging them out the water and pulling them up onto the bank.

Eventually said mass of limbs had calmed down and was now leant on their knees and elbows as they retched up pond water. Seeing that they were alive, I collapsed for what felt like the hundredth time that day.

“I thought you said you weren’t jumping in after me?” heaved a familiar voice from beside me.

I whipped my head around in shock, practically giving myself whiplash, to see Kay hunched over on the bank next to me, looking exactly like she did several hours ago, albeit now soaked from head to toe, her copper hair sticking wherever it could on her face. I shrieked many indiscernible noises, almost refusing to believe that she was here after all that. All I could do was wrap around her in a desperate hug, finally feeling like I was no longer going to hyperventilate for the fiftieth time that day.

Letting go, we took some time to calm down and regain our energy. The burning question still stood firm, however, as we observed our surroundings. We both looked at each other, eager to ask questions, but the inconceivable events from today left us utterly dumbstruck, too stunned to even say a word to each other. We were totally tongue-tied.

Although it didn’t last long.

All that movement had jostled my injuries, and I let out a quite hiss as the adrenaline wore off, my whole body feeling like I had been run over three times and processed through a meat grinder.

Kay’s head moved like flash, setting her scrutinising eyes on my pained grimace, before scanning my soggy appearance. A gasp flew out as she caught sight of the now dried streaks of blood down my right arm. Reaching out she snatched up my wrist and I opened my hand as much as I could, allowing her to survey the gashes across my palm and fingers.

She raised her eyebrow at me, looking for an explanation and I sheepishly admitted to trying to poke a magical veil with a stick. She wasn’t amused.

“Did you wanna take a picture?” I kidded, doing my best to lighten the atmosphere, whilst also trying to focus on anything but my hand.

My attempt seemed to work, though, as it wasn’t a second before her phone was out her bag, zooming in on my open hand, the camera shutter going off several times as I cracked up as much as my ribs would allow me at her priorities.

As she went to return it, I used that hand to drag over my bag, unzipping it to take out my miniature first aid kit. Swivelling back, she furrowed her brows in confusion at me using my bloodied hand. She eyed my other hand, watching as I cradled it to my chest as I attempted to open the kit with one hand.

“What else happened?” she demanded. I looked up at her sheepishly.

“I mayyyy have broken a fewwww….. bones?” I meekly confessed; my voice shaky as the waves of pain crashed over. I withdrew slightly at the sight of her expression hardening. “I didn’t exactly hit the water like you did.”

“Bones.” She deadpanned.

I darted my eyes around, scratching the side of my neck with a finger whilst avoiding eye contact with the storm that was now developing in front of me.

“Like…. A couple ribs and my wrist?” I smiled nervously, slowly dragging the first aid kit towards me with my bleeding hand to see if I could open it again. “It’s not like you can say anything, with your borderline concussion.” I pointed out the large cut on her forehead and the fact she was blinking far too much whilst also swaying slightly.

A hand swatted me away, before snatching up the kit. Within a minute or so my arm was cleared of both fresh and crusted blood, red replaced with white as Kay secured the bandage in its place with medical tape. I tried my best with my ruined hands to stick the large plaster over her cut in return, after she had cleaned it.

After tidying the equipment away, she clambered to her feet. Stretching out her painfully sore back with a groan, she scanned our current location, the both of us now recalling that we were currently god knows where. I tried my best to follow suit, carefully pushing myself up and limping over.

“Where in the actual fresh hell are we?” I asked. Kay shrugged her shoulders.

“I’m just as clueless as you.” She replied. She stared at my swelling wrist before deciding. “We have to find a village or town though, otherwise you’re fucked the most if we stay out here.”

I agreed with her and retrieved my bag. Not seeing that she had spotted my limp.

“Don’t tell me your ankle’s fucked as well!” She cried over the rain. I turned around slowly to see her displeased expression.

“It’s only twisted.” I explained nervously. God she had eyes like a hawk.

With a frustrated sigh, she strode over and reached into one of the front pockets of my bag. Taking out the spare tote bag I had packed, she insisted on lightening my bag’s contents, as to not worsen my injuries.

Slowly but surely, due to my mangled ankle and her aching back, we chose a direction we thought best and began our trek, leaving the meadow behind as we entered the dark forest.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

<; Chapter 3 // Chapter 4 // Chapter 5 >

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Can't wait to see you on the 14th April for Chapter 5! Also please comment if you want to be added to the Taglist <3

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[ritualofcirice]

On Everyone’s Camera Roll but One (Chapter 1, a Marvus x Reader)

🐑 ♡ Thank you Sycamore dearest for beta'ing this for me ♡🐑

You're the newest (or rather first) alien on the block, and you've spread like wildfire across social media. There's no way you'd understand the danger you put yourself in, nor the jealousy you've invoked from your newest fan.

Explicit, Graphic Depictions of Violence, F/M, M/M, Other/M, Tag(s): Obsessive Behaviour, Possessive Behaviour, Selfies, Mind Control, Mind Manipulation, Hallucinations, Nightmares, Vomiting, Graphic Injuries, Graphic Descriptions, Graphic Descriptions of Corpses, Or What's Left, Blood, Dream Sequence, brief mention of hanging, Withdrawal, POV Switching, Gender Ambiguous Reader, POV Second Person

Find it on ao3 ♡ WC: 3,016

Chapter 1

Lights danced around your peripheral as you focused on Marvus. He had been kneeling before you this whole time, since the moment he had placed you onto the soft fabric of the seat. You’d sunk down, enveloped in the smooth material, and allowed him to fuss over you. The only time he had left your side was to fetch you a sandwich. What remained, he removed with tender care. There was no need for it to take that long to wipe away a few crumbs, but he stole those seconds. You endured them.

The blood in your veins boiled, and you were left faint, pink in the face. You felt so vulnerable. Distracted.

When he broke contact with you, you were left to stare as he rubbed together his thumb and dirtied forefinger. Half lidded eyes wandered along your expression, and inspected you. Satisfied that everything was in order, he then flicked away the crumbs he had caught with a smile. It was the same smile that left you enraptured when he had walked out onto stage. You hadn't understood the fixation others had with him until then. Until the purple lights fell upon the audience and touched your souls in that glorious, yet horrific moment. Most of it was a blur, blocked out. All you recalled was seeing the purple light reflected in his eyes. It was like magic. You understood it all, although, amidst your infatuation you faced the horrors of the audience who shared in your feelings. Everything was purple in that light. Blood had evaporated into mist. Thick, purple mist. Screams. At first, you had been startled by their shrill ringing, then relaxed. Everyone at the concert loved Marvus, of course, so it was natural that the screams might be a bit feral in nature.

Yet, they continued like a mourning howl.

All around you bodies had writhed in the mist, and an elixir of colours had pooled at your feet. It was a massacre draped in the sweet serenade of a rap artist, drenched in all the colours of his brand of royalty. You had watched him in your infatuation. And they all screamed.

A shudder ran down your spine as they echoed in your mind, too real for comfort. Never before had you heard someone scream like that, from genuine terror or pain, or whatever it had been - bloodcurdling described it well. Even in your time on the planet, you hadn’t heard anything like that.

A lazy flick of the wrist from Marvus returned your focus to him, visually. The carousel of horror screeched ever onwards within your mind. Audible. There. Blurred figures passed by you, and you recognised them as the camera crew from the outline of the boom microphone. They left, and the door slammed behind them. You were alone in the green room with him.

“boo u gud ? ?” Marvus soothed at the sudden jolt that rocked your body. You must have looked at the door when it closed, because you were hyper aware of how your focus lurched towards Marvus. You would have nodded, but it would have made things worse. Instead, you attempted to make a sound. A whimper failed to pass your lips, and you gave a breathy sigh. The string of letters fared no better. Fangs poked through his lips as he drew them back in a grimace. Everything about his face was so clear to you, unlike the world, but you couldn’t make out what his expression was supposed to be. He frowned while his eyes smiled, and the cock of his head marked a lack of seriousness. His hand was one your face too. It took you a moment to notice, even though it was so cold in comparison to your cheeks. A thumb stroked your soft skin, and you winced at the reality before you. None of it made sense. He did though. You did. Together. You couldn’t believe he would give you this sort of attention.

“Why did you save-” you began, but a finger was pressed to your lips. Fire coursed through you. It burnt.

Oh.

His lips moved.

Focus.

“welllll i guezz its bcuz i saw u w the guy u waz w” he sighed. Nothing changed much about his expression, except for the fork of a smile. Thoughts passed through his mind that you couldn’t read in those narrowed eyes. Yet, you saw him. The guy you were with. Before, that was. You saw his corpse in the crowd. Blood. Screams. You didn’t know if the scream you heard was his, or another. It didn’t sound like him. You didn’t know if anyone sounded like themselves when they were ripped apart.

“n i was like sheeeet wat a sry mfer” each word pierced through the memories. “u no dat buddy b bad news fam LOL he b a mo fxxkin pa ra SITE” Reality slipped away from you again, and you returned to the memory. The guy you were with was dead. The guy you had been with. Everything Marvus said overlaid across the images, and you followed it. When blue blood leaked onto your shoes, you followed his voice. Through the screams you could still hear him.

"dats a secret btween us tho, we b lookin out 4 ourselvs" Another shudder. Marvus' words were closer. Unable to control yourself, you felt your legs tighten, thighs clenched. Your hand covered Marvus' where he held your cheek. He stopped too. The breath that had fanned against your ear hitched, then returned in shallow puffs. He leant into you, head titled in your direction, but you couldn't see his eyes. All you saw was purple. Purple and gold on his jacket. The purple mist in your periphery and the jaunty lights, and hair. So much hair. You could have just nestled in it and given yourself to him, if it meant being able to get in that beautiful display of perfectly miskempt strands.

Marvus declined and denied you that opportunity, however, his hand removed with a playful poke of your nose.

"us clowns r close knit u no ? take care of each otha n all dat shizzz" You heard him alright. He had kept you safe. Your focus on him made you feel safe, even if your ears itched with sounds that didn't belong.

"i no u take care o ur friends too bcuz i bin seein all those pics o u evrywhere boo" he drawled, hands spread for a dramatic flair of just how everywhere ‘everywhere’ was. "its like ur famous always in those photos w sum1 else or hidin in da background of anothr"

Every image you conjured of your friends turned to chaos. Intrusive thoughts twisted those memories into something else. You were there with them, their corpses. Or you saw them with a blade, or a hammer, a flash of something that lurched towards you.

"u got ur very own paparazzi like me" Marvus continued, "dats y i gotta tell u its not safe" Before you could ask him to clarify what wasn't safe, he explained. Deep down inside, a primal fear knew what he told you. Even in the plush comfort of the chair, with Mavrus standing guard over you, the planet you inhabited together would eat you alive.

"fans can get all kinds o nasty wild" each word was dripped with the venom of someone who had experienced what he spoke of. "n deez otha trolls only look out for 1 troll n dats them not u" His softness returned, and Marvus' hand found his way to your cheek again.

"i c u n ifeelu" he hummed. "clown or not i alwayz got ur back n dats a promiss" You couldn't resist the wink he shot you. He even poked his tongue out between those canines, and your heart soared. All you wanted was to be around him. Words like that were why you were there. You wanted to be friends. To be more than that. You wanted him to keep you safe.

"end o da day if we both stars den we r equal" Everything in the room swam in dissonance, but he made sense. So when a noise outside of the room bothered him, and he asked if you wanted to get your little show on the road, there was only one answer.

Even if it killed you.

Anxiety lurched in your guts as you tried to rise from your seat, but not as much as the sandwich. You hunched over hard, stomach tensed in agony, and your head pounded. Vomit seemed to appear beneath you. You barely felt it, but the acidic burn left a foul taste.

You did feel the hand around your waist that stabilised you though. The one that held you close to him. He asked if you needed to be carried again, and in your absence of a response, he decided for you. The world shifted at a hundred miles per hour until it settled on him. Marvus beamed at you, with a sweet chitter of laughter that reassured you that you weren't a fool.

"howzabout we go 2 my hive n get u cleaned up b4 u go stinkin up evrythang" He threw in that he would sort you out some food too, once your insides had settled. All of it sounded nice. It was nice with him.

You could hold onto him when the memories leaked out of your head. When the mist had eyes, and you could hear the screams, he was there. It all overwhelmed you. Everything did, the sights, the sounds, but you could hear and see him fine. When you looked at him, it died down. The fires that sparked around you were put out one by one. He didn't have to take you to his hive for you to feel at home. Tears welled and bundled into droplets that streamed down your face at that thought. He was the home you had missed all this time.

All this time you had been lost.

"u no i got u" he told you. "sleep"

And that's exactly what you did. It hit you like a scuttlebug, and you were cast into turmoil. The green room became the crowd again, and you weren't with him. He should have been on the stage but he wasn't. You searched, but a hand gripped you. Blue painted nails dug into your flesh tight. Unforgiving. Pain rippled through your nerves, and you turned to see the guy you were with. What was left. A single arm remained attached to yours. It was severed at the elbow, and tendons hung from the bloodied stump of bone that looked as if it had been chewed on by a wild beast. Savaged. There was no clean cut, just gore.

There was no way to describe the panic you felt. Nor the frantic attempt you made to remove the arm from your body. In the end, your own blood dribbled down your arm in long stretches of desperate claw marks. Agony written in red ink. As you moved away from the arm, towards the stage, you felt more. Saw more. The crowd became dense. It swayed and pulsated with vile hatred. All there was, was violence. Senseless violence and those damned screams. Each one dominated your heart and told your body not to move. Each scream forced you to watch the carnage unfold before you.

Worst of all was the stench. Vomit bubbled in your throat, and you coughed. Yet it didn't budge. You bent over, stuck your fingers down your throat, and nothing came up. Nothing came up. You couldn't find him. Nothing came up no matter how hard you looked. You needed him. Between the lights, it felt as though the world moved on its side, and you felt immediate relief. The vomit spewed out of your mouth, sideways as if it defied all gravity, and you spluttered on oxygen and spit.

After the relief, all you could do was cry for Marvus, but there were no purple lights. No music. He wasn't anywhere.

Not until you woke up. You knew the second you opened your eyes you had been dreaming, but it hit you all the same. Tears stained your cheeks, and Marvus mentioned that he had just finished getting rid of the puke, only for you to mess yourself up again. You didn't care though as you threw yourself up in the dim light. You caught him in your arms and curled them tight around his neck so that you could be close to him.

Your nightmare had been real to you, and you lived it alongside your memories as he comforted you. All the while, you allowed yourself to cry. When it began to die into a sniffle, then silence, you made sense of your surroundings. His hive.

Psychedelic graffiti moved like snakes along the wall, and popped in the purple mist that had followed you. Unidentifiable stains lurked in even the most obvious of places. The black void of the flat screen television, and spacious area filled with an assortment of random furniture, either left you in his living room or a storage cupboard. Either would have made sense. You didn’t care though. You had him. Your clown. The door to the room was sealed, and as far as you knew, there were no camera crews.

Everything was quiet.

Marvus retracted from you, and his fingers worked to wipe away the rest of the tears that coated your slick face. A soft hum vibrated in his throat, and you gazed into his eyes. In the dark, his pupils had dilated, and he held a softness to his features.

“ur so dam warm bb u no dat ? ?” Marvus murmured. Dimples had formed on your cheeks where his claws nestled deeper. He had been positioned beside you on the chair, albeit he shifted so that his knee lay between your thighs, and pulled himself up by the time he had spoken again. A slither of air hissed between his teeth, and his face was obscured by both height and hair. Despite the nausea induced stench that plagued the hive, you couldn’t ignore the sweet sugary perfume that masked a layer of spray paint and sweat.

When you looked up, all you saw was your clown. Your saviour from the hellish crowds. You had seen death, but you had not come that close to it before. And there was your reward above you, a sharp jaw with those eyes that seemed to know everything in their hazy depths. He owned the world with the way he moved, and the flick of a smile goaded you into doing his bidding. A phone hung over you both. His face was reflected back. It seemed like so much effort and so effortless all at once to be him. Hair cascaded around his features in all the right places. Skin was exposed from rips and tears in his clothing, and along the low cut of the vest tucked beneath a vibrant jacket. Eye candy.

“bin wantin 2 hav a lil photoshoot w u 4 a wile” he soothed, each word honey as his mirror image watched you with intrigue. “mayb we can do a propr 1 latr n make a lil wall of memories or sumthin ufeelme” A motion towards the wall beside you both made you realise it could use a bit of sprucing up. It was empty. A stark void in comparison to the sensory overload that was the rest of the room. A perfect wall for all the memories you would make together, photographed, hung up, and adored.

Troll pressed into you.

“smile popcorn” Right. The camera. You managed to do as instructed between the haze of infatuation. A flush unrivalled. He must have felt the heat because you sure felt the cold touch of his skin. He had enveloped you for the photo, and his arm hooked around the back of your neck. A bright light shook what remained of your senses, and you blinked away the impression left on your vision in the aftermath. Marvus himself wasted no time in making himself at home. He continued to use you as a bodywarmer, weight rested on your leg. His claws tapped on his phone screen, and the glow illuminated his glee as he found the picture you had just taken.

“yeh we got it” he told himself, then flashed you the screen with a toothy grin. “look at these 2 qts” You swallowed, unable to bring up any words as he continued to bombard you with his own.

“bet it wud make sum o ur othr friends jelly if i posted dis” he hummed “hard 2 b such an instant click like dam bb u da perfect accessory” His eyes widened at his own words, and his phone disappeared in a flash. Once again, a hand found your cheek, except he leant in close. Closer. He leant in until his forehead rested against yours, and his breath fanned against your lips.

“ur not just an accessory tho dont worry” Marvus cooed. “theres no u either honeyboo” Your own breath remained baited.

“add an s n u got us from now on” The lights around you intensified, and the purple seemed to crawl into his eyes. “u got no idea how dangerous it is 4 a lil snack like u to b walkin around out there”

In the cold depths of his touch, you melted into him. Gave in. He was right after all. It was dangerous, and you felt safe with him. You wanted to be there. You wanted him. In memories of screams, he was your silence.

You were just an alien on a planet you didn’t understand, but one he understood well.

You hadn’t seen that before, but you did now.

He was your clown and you loved him.

There wasn’t even a ‘you’.

There was only an ‘us’.

“we gonna be all cosy n safe in here from now on k boo” Marvus soothed. “u n me 4evah”

♡ Chapter two ♡

[lonesomedotmp3]

this is so embarrassing <3 but would you happen to maybe possibly have a merlin (2008) fic rec list beloved mutual..... not nearly enough fic writers get it like my beloved mutuals do

i can assure you that is absolutely not even close to as embarrassing as it is to have devoured any and everything the merlin fanfiction world has to offer. i have read aus that you would not believe. i have been subjected to characterisations and headcanons that would make anyone else instantly close the tab. i have read authors with such a poor clumsy grasp of british slang i could weep from embarrassment. yet i persevered. for MONTHS. and here is what me (and beth <3) have managed to scrounge up after all of that. please use everything i've just said as context that we were NOT in our right minds reading these. proceed with caution

tributes - the! hunger! games! fic!!!! iconic legendary spectacular THEE revolutionary turnaround for the merlin fanfiction game and for the horrors generally. do NOT go in overhyped tho me and beth went in like haha what a cool weird au and then it caught us off-guard that it wasn't written terribly. also good for something longer and about much more than just merlin and arthur. it's fr like watching the show again for better and for worse. it's got camp whimsy it's got our main duo acting like complete freaks it's got this constant suffocating sense of inevitable tragedy... slayed!

history books forgot about us and in dreams - by the hunger games writer so u know it's actually written well!! don't read their other stuff tho just trust me. my memory of the first one isn't great but i remember feeling with both that finally FINALLY someone Got the finale like me + beth did. short but just rlly solid satisfying follow-ups to the show.

the court of avalon - freya + arthur best friendism in avalon realest shit ever said!!! makes me go fucking crazy fr. YES this has way too much magic lore bullshit to it and i don't careeee they're my friends.... and FINALLY a proper post-finale fic where they don't just freeze arthur in time for 1500 years...

to the point of fear - slay little mordred character study!!!!

the world i built for you - the disir fix-it!! smth i have always wanted due to being sooooo Normal about that episode (arthur's matrix. if u even care). not perfect but worth a read for sure!!

long title and also long title - i rlly like established relationship fics. sorry for being cringe and boring some crimes can never b forgiven etc.

like clouds in starlight widely spread - ok the rest of these i'm going to copy/paste from my list for beth sorry <3 but if i've already written a little deseription for each one why give myself more work yk. anyway: sad and wistful and A Lot as someone who was about to move out of my hometown when i read this. if i said it chapter two vibes. actually that doesn't mean anything ignore that. at one point arthur goes "are you trying to tell me something?" and merlin responds with, "i'm always trying to tell you something." which uh. he really is huh. it's whatever though.

fundamental imperfection - merlin and arthur as writers, gets their first meeting right (arguing and being dicks, then immediately becoming obsessed with each other). don't remember much else except the sequel is unfinished heavy angst and i cried like three times. don't read that (+ HIGHLY positively peer reviewed by beth. tell us a story about love!!!)

as long as we have we - i know you've read that fake marriage christmas fic which i love a lot (maybe it has problems but it's just so endearing...) and this is the same vibe. or well it's christmas and it's sweet so

(and said xmas fic: no matter how far away you roam <3)

tintagel - i don't know how i feel abt merlin and arthur in this but the parallels made to ygraine and nimueh are just too insanity inducing to ignore. my price is my life yours is to bear witness.... they wrote that in 2009!!!! insane

ok that's a lot + it's the best merlin ff has to offer. which is still not that great but. enjoy!! + b thankful you do not have to go into the hellscape that is the merlin ao3 tag...

kingdoms - i have no memory of this tbh but i wrote 'yeah.' underneath the bookmark so it's gotta have something

sorry edit one more I forgot - merlin and arthur are exes and arthur is just soooo weird and sad and repressed about it. also peer reviewed 🫶 (X) and also check out beth's merlin fanfiction recs tag if for some insane reason u want more. ok bye 🫂

[kiryoutann]

HIII RYOU💞 how are you my dear?

i just read chapter 22 and WOW lumine is so adorable, she deserves a super happy ending🥺

You’re not even half, as pretty, and it’s killing you.

You're a dream, and she's not even half as pretty.

THE PARALLELS!!!!! they are both so beautiful and amazing i want to punch childe for making both of them feel this way :( im really feeling so sorry for lumine, i think under different circumstances she and yn would be good friends🥺

"Childe was the one who once drew stars around your scars, however, now he is also the one who carved a new one on you—the deepest one." THE REFERENCE!!! we are having taylor swift and pain for the breakfast (and i love it)

ryou i have a question, after the end of between kisses you intend to write extra chapters, right? is there any chance that one of these extras is a different version of what happened from chapter 17 onwards? like, lumine actually getting pregnant🤠 i confess that, even though this chapter made my heart bleed, i was curious to know the course of things where childe and yn would really have to divorce (and see him noticing his feelings too late because 🤩ANGST🤩)

im really praying for the ending to be happy, but im not going to lie, i would love a little more angst hehe you got me addicted to suffering ryou!!!

anywayyyy, THANK YOU FOR ANOTHER AMAZING CHAPTER💞 hope u have an amazing weekend🥰

— 🦄

ps: im anxious and scared for the next chapter with ZHONGLI AAAAANGST!!!! my tissues are already ready but my heart is not😨

HELLO!

i've been bad :( i got triggered over smth and ended up spending my week depressed TT_TT but now i'm feeling a bit better and still trying. hope you're doing well, 🦄!!

AHHHHH YOU NOTICED IT AGAIN! they're literally complimenting each other. i might make y/n and lumine as the endgame-

OKAY WELL, i wrote the chapter while listening to 'cardigan' (tiktok ver) so i GOTTA put that there. i'm obsessed with that song and THAT line. UGHHHHH so magical so bittersweet.

the extra chapters will be things that'll happen after the epilogue. so it won't be a different versions of (a) chapter or anything! I PROMISED NOT TO WRITE MORE ANGST AFTER THE EPILOGUE IM SORRY BB (╥﹏╥)(WELL, AT LEAST IN THIS FIC)

i can't blame u tho, angst is also one of my favorite thing in a fic lol

HOPE YOU HAVE A GREAT WEEK<3 take care and stay healthy!!

[actualbird]

I was talking to someone abt how my cat always meows in front of my bedroom door because he wants to be let inside (even when I'm not in my room). And they told me that I should put up a sign for him that says "gone fishing" so he knows I'm not in the room and I immediately thought abt Giann Von Hagen Standard Operating Procedure x4 speedrun(tm) bc I literally reread the fic yesterday (it's amazing btw, I love the Von Hagens, I love polynxx that fic was like a dream come true). Btw idk if u even remember this one but I still think about your 'how to care for your dear friend who is currently stuck in his magical serpent form' fic on a daily basis.

omg ur cat sounds like a darling!!! we also have a cat here at home, owned by my older sister, and this cat also loves to sit at the doorway and meow Very Loudly but specifically when people have left the room and she wants people In The Room to Witness Her

witness her doing what??? not much. our cat just likes having a human present javkfjhaskf

cat ramble aside, hhHHH im so glad you enjoyed both those fics you mentioned 🥺🥺🥺

"standard operating procedure (x4 speedrun)" is going down in my personal hall of fame for many reasons, the biggest one being the fact that it was the first WIP in years that i managed to start, update, and complete without getting distracted by another other fic. genuinely, i have no idea how i did that back then i'd like some answers from past!zak...wHAT WAS YOUR SECRET?? AND HOW CAN I DO IT AGAIN 😭😭😭

i definitely have not forgotten about "how to care for your dear friend who is currently stuck in his magical serpent form", this WIP is very dear to me and ive mumbled a bit on twitter abt how i wanna turn marius back into a human and finish that fic once and for all with its 4th chapter before 2022 ends (an entire year-wait for probably de-noodle-ification and soul repair jahvsfkjahsfa) but...im very...Very Very hesitant....to make any promises whatsoever on my fic writing progress and schedule. like ajhsvfkajhsfvaks at this point, i just dont talk abt what im writing anymore bc i never stick to schedule anyway so. it will be as much as a surprise to me as it is to readers when my WIPs will update!! JHAJHDASJFH

still, it's rlly rlly nice to see that you enjoy both fics :')!!! the dragon!marius fic especially since it's from a while back and it's imcomplete haunts me everyday along with every other WIP i havent updated OTL

i too love the von hagens very much <3!! thank u for telling me abt ur cat! and the sign! and that u think abt my fics :'D