#dont know the steps to get there since it seems it be much steeper than it looks
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tvmblrsillyman · 3 years ago
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#neb talks#neb vents#its 4 am and been pondering abt like. My Totally Normal And Not Weird Or Mildly Unfortunate At All Uprising#anyways sorry to be vaguing on main especially on tumblr dot com but i do need to get this off my chest at least so that a) im more likely#to remember it and b) so either i can look back at it or have someone randomly like this post forcing me to look at this post months/years#later even tho i might Delete Later this post#regardless i feel weird apologizing every so often for being a hot unsocializable mess esp since i dont know how to work on it but lately#its getting to a point where im taking my unhealthy coping mechanism to the extremes again and resorting to talking to myself online#easier to deal with a vague audience rather than one on one or with a specific audience if that makes any sense#which is ironic considering my fears with Existing Online#still regardless if the internet have irreparably damaged me or not i dont know really what to do or how to feel like the one unlikable#person in the friend group that everyone is tolerating because they were cool and fun at one point but then sort of became an asshole and#practically that person likely stained their relationship with everyone involved#like its not even a Social Anxiety moment anymore and i know i shouks try to be hashtag more sociable And Confident And Secure but i just#dont know the steps to get there since it seems it be much steeper than it looks#but its not fair for everyone who has talked and known me long enough to see that transistion from the past 5-6 years#tldr: i feel like im a bad friend for being awkward quiet who doesnt really add anything#and ive pretty much have a history of isolating myself and ghosting people which Was Really Bad and im scared with how conflict avoidant#i can be will only make things worse with my insecurities regarding w/ my current friendship w/ certain ppl so ive resorted to Screaming#to the void to deal with that constant anxiety and drive away that urge to Disappear but that can only help so long and i rly should Just#Socialize 4Head but it is also the 1 thing i struggle at and i dnt know how to break that cycle without feeling like everything going wrong#sorry this is weirdly worded h8 typing in the tags wout disrupting ur dashboards w out a wall of incomphresensable txt that you cnt shorten
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thesoundofmadness · 7 years ago
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"Its not mine! Its my friends!"
As you walked down the hallway to get to your class, you heard Lloyd yell. You followed the sound of laughter until you heard a what sounded like paper ripping. You went to check it out. When you did you saw Lloyd on his knees, trying to get the paper that ripped. He got up and ran out of the school. "LLOYD WAIT!" You chased after him. You didn't even care if you were going to be late. Lloyd was your friend and you had to help him.
Unfortunaly, Lloyd was too fast for you. You quickly lost him inside all of the people in the crowd. You went and checked all the places you thought he'd be. His apartment, the flower garden in the park, Chens Noodle house, Steeper Wisdom, a treehouse in the forest that you and the rest of the team helped build, but he wasn't at any of those places. Finally you went to HQ. Thats the last place you figured he be. You didn't have a phone so you couldn't call him. Even if you did, he wouldn't awnser anyway. When you got there, his giant dragon mech was gone. Wow,  if he took his mech he must be really far away. You weren't very close with Lloyd but you did know that he only uses his mech on missions or if he has to get somewhere quickly and its far away. You got into your mech (It can be in the shape of whatever you want it to be, it just has to be a mech) and used your tracker to find him. He had installed trackers in everyones mech just in case someone needed to be found. Hah! There he is! Well, I hope he's there at least. You started it up and followed the tracker.
You found him at the top of a mountain (The old monestry in S1), just sitting there. "L-Lloyd?" (I swear that wasn't suppose to be a refrence to anything. Thats just how his name sounds when you stutter his name) You stuttered. He jumped and turned around. "Y-Y/n? What are you doing here?" He looked like he had been crying. His eye were slightly puffy and red, some tear stains glistened in the sunlight, and he was sniffing quite a bit. "I-I came here to s-s-see if you w-were okay....." You say while taking a step towards him. He took a step back. Did he think you were gonna hurt him? "Lloyd what hapened? Why are you out here?" "I-its n-nothing! I just wanted to be alone..." Now you were feeling tears in the back of your eyes. "Were you out here to.." Lloyds eyes widened. He didn't say anything, but you saw tears forming in his eyes. You ran over to him and hugged him. His arms stayed at his sides. Tears were rolling down both your guys cheeks. "Lloyd listen. It may not seem like it but there are alot of people who care about you. (*looks at the fangirls*) Me included. Please dont forget that. I wish you could believe that but I know its hard. I'm not very good at pep talk but I can assure you if you were to die right now, You mom, Kay, Jay, Cole, Zane, Nya, All of us would cry. You're the one who keeps us together. Please never forget that. " You didn't want to mention his dad since he freaking hates his dad. His arms stayed at his sides but you could feel warm tears on your shoulder. "Y/n please, I don't deserve this...." "Yes you do. Don't tell me you don't. You did nothing wrong. Not your fault that this happened, its theirs" You could feel even more tears on your shoulder. He finally hugged you back and started to sob. You stayed there, patting him on the back and telling him that it was okay. You seriously couldn't stand everyone at your school. Neither could him. Honestly, none of the Ninja could. After about 10 or so minutes, Lloyd released from the hug. He pulled something out of his pocket. It was the paper that had ripped eariler. You took it from him and read over it. It was a poem of yours. "Y-you d-d-dropped it....I-i was gonna-" You put your hand up and stopped him. "It doesn't matter. It's just a poem. I can rewrite it later. Don't worry about it." "Y-your p-poems and h-handwriting are amazing....You acidently leave t-them at the HQ all the time....i have alot of them...." He says quietly, hoping you wouldn't hear. (( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)) You blushed alittle. he was blushing as well. "'m sorry I'm sorry! I can give them back if you want!" "Uhhh actually, keep them. I always write at least 3 copies of my poems incase I lose one the orginal. It clearly makes you happy. Thats all I really care about. That everyone is happy when they read my poems." You smiled at him. He hugged you again. You hugged back. "Thank you." He released again and looked nervous. "Y/n look...theres something I wanna ask you..." "What is it?" "W-would you like to um.....uhhhh this harder than it looks uh..." You already knew what he was gonna say. Well, atleast you hoped that was what he was gonna say. You grabbed his hand and gave him a romantic, loving kiss on his lips. After about a minute, you heard an "awwww" coming from behind you.
It was right before Lloyd was gonna mess with your hair ( NO REGRETSSSSSSSSS)
You two released and looked over to see Kai, Jay, Cole, Zane and Nya standing there. You both were red faced. "U-uh. W-when did you guys get here?!" Lloyd NEARLY, just BARELY yells. "Just now." "How much did you see?" "Only you guys kissing" They were all doing the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) face.  "Hehe, I texted then telling them what I saw......" You say nervously. "So, whens the wedding?"
"bOI-"
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I might make a part 4 of the actual date that you go on with Lloyd. Idk tho
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