#dont have many positive relations there anyway so meh

[staijey-the-creator]

wehhhhh...

i dont wanna change computers :[

[imunbreakabledude]

I never got why after all these leagues there isnt some kind of dupe protection in place. I know that runescape is like the grind personified into a game but at least in a limited time mode i should be able to throw back dupes like how you can in blue moons for a chance at a new unique, if not a cap on how many dupes you can get because not being able to finish your build because you got rng'd feels horrible. I also feel like some ideas could be yoinked and retrofitted from rs3 about bad luck mitigation for leagues. I fear im becoming that guy who always finds a way to shove in the thing he likes into a conversation that isnt related to it lol

Also also i really agree with you about toa in general, its a really nice looking raid and I love the music and sound effects but like 80% of it is just such a slog to get through. None of the puzzles really feel difficult or interesting since runelite auto solves like 2.5 of them and i have a special disdain for monkey room pre max hit change, its not so terrible now but i will forever hold a grudge. The puzzles feel like autopilot meh or built to annoy me specifically. I really want to like the raid because i love almost everything desert related in both games but like the only good part of it is wardens and i just dont have the patience to sit through the rest of it or god forbid i get caught on one of the zebak waves and have to weigh resetting for purple chance or just finishing the raid, can't imagine going through it on an iron pre fang and lightbearer since those are so good for actually doing toa. Every time i go into toa i always have the thought 'damn i could be doing cox right now, or like anything else'

Also also also i'm not sure if you know the trick for getting consistent one downs on het puzzle so ill just leave this short video here, if you already know about it just ignore me. Anyways sorry for yapping into your ask box and i hope osrs, and life in general, has been treating you well

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fA1B90KmS7U

lol i got lots to say about all this too so buckle up

first - this is funny because I actually did type more of a rant about the het puzzle which got deleted by tumblr because APPARENTLY you aren't supposed to write thousands of words in the tags... but I did know the trick for 1-downs, I learned it when trying to get the combat achievement in the maingame, but personally I find it hard to get the right position/timing for it with many of the puzzle layouts. there's like one where it's pretty easy for me to get lined up right for the 1-down and for all the others I'm sure it's possible if you set it up right but it feels like so much effort for something so stupid. and it really pisses me off that it's like, if you're tick perfect you can avoid doing the same puzzle twice but if you're one tick off you must do it twice to remove 3hp left on the statue. I don't mind perfect timing/setup being rewarded, that's cool, but I like it best when that saves you a BIT of time but it still feels viable if you're ALMOST perfect? like it just feels so annoying to know you were 0.6sec or one tile positioning away from literally cutting the room in half... especially when it's so dull to do. tbh I should just get 99 mining so i can one-down without having to be tick perfect (definitely viable to knock out 99 mining before going back to toa in leagues, maybe not in the maingame LOL)

with the toa puzzles, it's tough bc I feel like Jagex wanted to mix it up and make this raid feel a bit different than just a boss rush but I don't know that they realized just how stupid they'd feel after doing them every time? yes you can make the argument that everything in runescape is repetitive and gets boring after a bit, but at least with CoX puzzle rooms you don't always get the same ones in every raid, and some of the "puzzles" are actually combat (ice demon), and they're also just a bit faster & have a few different strategies you can use depending on solo/group and skill/gear level, versus ToA puzzles that... well, I assume Jagex wasn't HOPING everyone would instantly use plugins to solve the puzzles for them, but they had to know it'd happen. because even if you enjoy figuring it out yourself the first few times it just gets dull to do it manually after a while... so it feels like a design mistake to have 2/4 puzzles that are the equivalent of clue scroll puzzle boxes, but taking 1-2 minutes to do.

also, comparing it to another aspect of the game that gets complained about a lot - gauntlet prep - I don't hate gauntlet prep, personally. it can also be frustating if you're "on the cusp" and lose 8min of work to a close bossfight BUT unlike ToA challenge rooms it's a bit more varied and has more skill expression. and it also ties into how you face the fight - toa puzzle rooms might be more engaging if how you solved them affected the boss that comes after them? but they don't. they're just extra steps, so they feel annoying. granted I'm saying that I don't mind or even slightly LIKED gauntlet prep after getting fairly lucky at CG, but... I did that prep 300+ times and don't hate it, while I've done the ToA Challenge rooms maybe... 30 or so times and already hate them.

zebak waves are the bane of my existence too... i mean that's hyperbole but they piss me off because they are so EASY to dodge in theory and yet somehow I manage to accidentally path into them once every 5 or so raids. i remember when ds2 came out and I had done ZERO pvm that galvek fight was super hard for me to beat and his wave attack was one part i really struggled with, bc it instakilled you, but yknow what, I hate that less than zebak. bc it's just rude how zebak's waves DON'T instakill you except they give you such a pitifully small window to 'recover' that you end up just watching yourself die slowly instead of instantly while clicking in vain to try to escape. Zebak is annoying bc he feels like both the easiest and hardest boss to me - generally very easy BUT he's also the one where if things go slightly wrong... i just die. so i've been doing him first every time because I really struggle if he's leveled up by Walk the Path whereas with the other bosses i barely notice if they're leveled up.

I'm so annoyed about this raid already with leagues making me super OP so I dread going back to the regular game where i will hit zeroes. lmao. the fact that fang and lightbearer are so common (relatively speaking) definitely feels bad for mains but good for irons bc they're accessible upgrades to help doing more ToA but it's definitely rough starting out... and hey, Shadow also reallllly helps with ToA so why didn't they make that as common as fang? (/s of course lol)

re: dry protection. I feel split on dry protection in Leagues for similar reasons I feel split on it for the maingame. I'm not worried about the economic effects or anything; I think as it is already, bots and RWT fuck the economy way more than dry protection ever could. what makes me split about it is that, for better or worse, the randomness is part of this game? and the feeling of getting lucky hits different when you know how unlucky you COULD get; likewise, the feeling of going dry and then finally getting it is a really rewarding feeling... at least for SOME drops. but the fact remains that certain grinds feel way worse to go dry on, and when one person gets very unlucky and goes dry a lot of places, that just... sucks. so I'm not totally opposed to a gentle version of dry protection where the longer you go without a certain unique, your rate of it increases... I'm not in favor of guaranteed pity drops in general EXCEPT for specific situations like Vorkath's head, for simple untradeable upgrades, especially those that you already had to do a quest to unlock (side note, it pissed me off that ancient icon didn't have the guaranteed drop like vorkath's head, feels like it should).

in leagues I see the argument for it being a limited time mode so we should make it as fun as possible BUT it's a fine line to me. because as annoyed as i am not getting what i want from raids, I also don't know that it would be that much more fun for me if I knew I'd get a new purple every raid? because then it'd just become a checklist of like, "I'll do ToA ~8 times, then do CoX ~15 times, then go back to whichever one's faster for me to get other megarares for all the tasks" and the league would feel "over" even faster than it already does? as i said it's a fine line. because going dry sucks especially in a temp mode, but on the other hand, if I knew I was guaranteed to get all the highest-end drops in a certain amount of time, it would just feel like a routine to unlock it quickly then have no reason to continue. idk. it's hard to say. I've always been a proponent of making your leagues build in such a way that you know you'll have fun even if you don't get rare gear because it's kinda hard to get some items even with 5x rate. and I'm enjoying my build as it is even without full masori/tbow. I see the argument for it but idk if I fully believe in it...

I do think it was a great choice by jagex to put dry protection on the echo orbs/echo items though. because those are things that are ONLY available in this limited time mode, so making sure everyone can access them reasonably helps ensure everyone gets to try out the specific fun that's unique to this league. whereas if you can't get a tbow/shadow/whatever in th league, that might be disappointing, but you still can hypothetically enjoy those in the main game. but this is literally the only chance to play with the echo stuff.

I think they also made a great call with the megarare vouchers and making multiple purples possible for a team in ToA/HMT. and take my opinion here with a grain of salt as someone who didn't raid in past leagues and hasn't raided much in the maingame. but it still feels a LITTLE wonky now... ToA and TOB feel much better as raids to grind in leagues now, right? but now CoX feels awkwardly bad? it had the advantage before of being the only one where multiple purples could be obtained in a team (i think) but now it doesn't have the same guarantees for teams AND it has the lowest megarare chance out of the 3 raids? as someone with both zeah and desert I would go back and forth between cox and toa to mix it up but it just feels so silly when a tbow would make cox so much easier and a tbow could be obtained faster from toa, yknow?

yeah lol anyway there's all my rants about raids in leagues... definitely feeling the tiniest bit of regret over not going morytania now but this trio made sense for the build i wanted, and i might do an alt with something like VTM melee if I have the time/energy after getting dragon cup.

[fuegios-diary]

Falling in Love

Around 2020, I fell in love with the thought of being a detective or an investigator.

It all started when I randomly wanted to watch the Sherlock series on Netflix.

It was amazing. The Science of Deduction! The way how one can observe, analyze, and conclude!

"Goodness," I thought. "I want to be like Sherlock Holmes"

After a while, many months later or so (or I think even more than a year!) I saw an anime called "Moriarty the Patriot" showing on Netflix.

Moriarty The Patriot

So, I decided to watch it.

Not only was I amazed by William's genius, but the more I fell in love with the science of deduction. I also want to share that my eyes were further opened in the political and societal aspects of the unjust and unfair existing hierarchy between the nobles and the commoners.

Anyway, somewhere along the line, I felt like i couldn't make myself consume any more media related to this theme. The reason was that I felt like I couldn't achieve what William or Sherlock had.

Beliefs and Foundations

I have a negative perfectionist belief in me. "If I'm not as amazing as them at the get-go, then it's impossible to reach that goal."

Gosh, it took a while for me to verbalize that belief or foundation of mine.

But, when I verbalized it and acknowledged it, that was the moment I could challenge it.

I realized deep in me, I couldn't just let that love of mine go just for some limiting belief!

BS Forensic Science or Criminology

But, another obstacle appeared. When I finally decided to pursue this love of mine as a profession, my brother told me the reality of existing politics in the workplace, especially in the government.

Here's a little background:

I wanted to take up forensic science or Criminology and have work experience, which I could mainly get in the government workplace. The reason for wanting to get experience from the government workplace was because I wanted to put up my own detective agency. But in order to do that, I needed some credentials and credibility. Therefore, working in the government had to be an option.

But, when my brother explained to me in detail the politics in the workplace of such a profession in the government, I felt like I didn't have the foundations to be in such a place. It would have been too difficult for me. The place is toxic, that's the gist of my brother's stories and explanations. He also mentioned how the workplace affected my dad. My dad, by the way, was a police man with the position of a General and he was exposed to such a toxic environment which was difficult for him.

So, anyway, I gave up pursuing that dream altogether.

Until the present.

Sherlock Holmes Book Collection

A few months ago, I was able to buy the Sherlock Holmes book collection at the Big Bad Wolf Book Event.

But it wasn't until now, December 2024 that I decided to read it.

It's been on display on one of my tables here in my room. And everytime I glance at it, I feel like I wanted to read it.

Reason for not reading it until now, I didn't feel interested enough anymore.

But anyway, I decided to read it for fun. Meh, why not right?

The Sparking of Love Once Again

I read the first chapter.

I had a few giggles here and there.

But I felt it again. Deep down, this theme amazed me.

I felt it in my chest. It was the same excitement I had the first time I watched the Sherlock series, and the Moriarty the Patriot anime series.

I wanted to pursue it somehow.

But I knew that working in the government was out of the picture.

Also, I actually want to tell you that I was pursuing Animezin PH (one of my projects where I blog and make videos about anime meets mental health themes). This was my main project, and I wanted to focus on it and make it my main source of income.

Doing all of them

I was thinking deeply a night ago, December 8, 2024.

I was thinking "Why should we only commit to one passion? Can't we commit to all of our passions? Can't we deepen our love and knowledge on all of them?"

It's true, we dont have all the time, money, and effort in the world.

But it doesnt mean you shouldn't sacrifice other passions.

I believe we can pusue all of them, with whatever capacity and time we have. We reach what we can reach as long as we're alive.

Prioritizing and Intertwining My Passions

However, since time, money, and effort are limited, I thought that the best option is to prioritize my passions without sacrificing other passions.

Do you know the hierarchy of needs by Maslow?

We need to provide our basic needs first before we can reach the other higher levels.

Currently, I am finding ways on how I can intertwine my passion of being a detective with Animezin PH and my other projects that would be my main sources of income.

At the same time, I will hone my problem-solving abilities, observation, deduction, and analysis abilities, through social interactions and my current projects (like programming a game website) and journalling what I learn through blogging and content creation for Animezin PH.

Concluding this sharing

Me and my dad are close. And when I shared him everything I shared on this post, he told me that I'm on the right track.

He shared to me as well that one of my weaknesses is: I plan but I don't execute the plans. Theory without Application.

He also mentioned that, with regards to being a detective, I could put up a private investigative agency, or work in other private investigator agencies without working in the government.

But of course, I need the necessary knowledge before starting that. So, I'm going to study things on UDEMY (not sponsored), and continue reading the Sherlock Holmes books, and most importantly, apply what I learn in any endeavors and projects I have.

As for gaining experience, I dont know yet how to do that, nor do I plan to take up any college course.

But I want to focus on my Circle of Influence: the things within my control. Which is working on my current projects and not worry about what ifs, what nots, the far future, and the negatives that hadn't even happened.

Anyway, there's no point in life if I don't pursue the things I love.

That's all for now. :)

[grlfriends]

revolutionary girl utena review

ep 1-5

the plot is actually kinda different from what I thought ?? in my mind the plot was: utena was a girl in a princess school who each and every princess would be "conquered" (for a lack of better words rn) in a ceremonial duel by a prince who fancied them, maybe she didnt wanna wanna marry anyone or she liked Anthy already but anyway in my mind utena showed up in the ceremony with duel clothing and then, in a very brave tm like-scene, she would openly declare she refused to be conquered by anyone and tbh I'm not even sure how Anthy would come into the plot... but back into what actually happened in the episodes everything so far is very introductory and just showing what mechanics will be explored further down the line I think?? the op is really good too

also every boy so far reminds me so much of knights of the zodiac?? maybe it's just the design I guess...) and nanami can get these hands, jealousy is a disease and she's the sickest person on earth for all I know

dont ask me why bit I just feel like room of mirrors - gfriend has a very well fitting vibe for it but I'm not exactly sure why hm.... 🤔🤔

ep 6-12

ok so why does this school just have random animals around 😐 I could understand the horse but a bull and a kangaroo?? what ...

touga just says the most random dramatic things and then just casually says anyone who believes in friendship is a fool ?? the guy wouldnt last a day in the naruto universe tbh, he kinda irks me in some way but I'm not sure why so I'll live with this strange feeling for a while I guess

↳ okay so watching ep 10 made me especially kinda creeped out, I know I've watched only 10 eps so far but like can he fall downstairs and break a neck or something already ...

also haha what if I watched that bet on it fmv and gave myself a bunch of spoilers would that be funny or what 😍 this is why i cant have nice things yall.... hope my memory goes to shit when sleep so I dont remember about it this week while I finish it

I feel like the main thing on the episodes are parallels, one way or another I always feel like they're setting up parallels and giving me clues for a bigger picture and a deeper plot arc that is still to come and the bet on it fmv just made this impression stronger, also I wanna say it's done in a good way, one that is both mysterious (??) and "honey you've got a big storm coming" at the same time 🤔🤔 much to think about honestly

↳ just saw ep 11 and even though I already knew this was coming sooner or later it still felt like crap seeing utena lose to dick head, at the end of the episode when he says anthy was always just reflecting utena's own wishes for himemiya (in another way bc I dont remenber the exact words) it felt like 😐 bc yes I knew that (the way she was working her thoughts was simply a copy and paste of what utena was saying) at all time I kept those essays about anthy in my head, I dont think theyll be truly relatable to what I'm seeing rn but yeah anthy rights (even though I know you betray/cheat on utena down the line bc of the bet on it fmv but I'm sure you had your own motivation)

↳ saw ep 12 bc I just couldnt handle being in a cliffhanger and yeah it happened what I absolutely thought it would lmao not that it was that difficult to foresee but yeah, I kinda liked how utena did it for her instead of being like "oh I wanna save anthy from touga" and treating her like a damsel in distress (I know that's kinda her position as the rose bride for what I've been told so far and that this is a subject spoken about in many many essays on tumblr but yeah) bc so far she's been treated as a trophy and a way to get something else, for the green haired guy it was a way to see something eternal, for miki it was a way to hold on into his "shining thing" and for touga it seems (so far) like a way to manipulate (just like he does with nanami) and just mark his position as above everyone else as he seems to view himself?? man I might be saying random stuff rn but it kinda does makes sense in my mind with the information I've had to this point

ep 13-25

honestly 😐😐 through 9 whole episodes I felt like they were trying to make the side characters deeper and show their hidden face and motivations but it felt so shallow...... not even actually shallow, just not deep enough that it would make me care about these characters and the fact there was no actual build to showing us why we're getting to know these characters backgrounds was just kinda meh too, didnt really help that all episodes had all the same formula and the same timing just for the developers made in those episodes be forgotten at the end and also just that pink haired guy could be like "ah failure again", it felt like watching the same episode over and over again, it was really tiring and like?? girl help I do not care about these characters at all, I feel like it could have been done well (like the keiko ep in comparison to the furuba chapter that deals with the yuki appreciation (??) club president graduating.... the way this ep was done and setup didn't really bring me any emotions) overall not to my taste and tbh I feel like I could have skipped all those episodes except for maybe the miki and juri one so 😑

all nanami focused episodes are the worst so far, she's so boring and I cant stand now annoying she is, the diary episode?? the cow episode?? the episode when tsuwabiki fuels with utena?? honestly I know they're trying to show me a better and different side of her but it just doesnt!! work!! bc i feel no sympathy for her, my biggest wish rn is her and touga just disappearing and no more filler episodes🗣🗣

I thought akio was utena's prince?? but apparently he's just anthy's brother and like.. I'm do done with his little talks with utena and yadda yadda, I just wanna see their duel is that too much to ask I'm dying over here (if this lenga lenga continues until ep 25 i will be so mad bc why were so many episodes wasted on such boring and and not necessary side characters backstories?? idc about them at all man aaaaaaaaaa)

↳ ep 25 was good finally we got what we deserve boys 😭😭😭😭😭 can utena just beat up akio already I'm tired of his ass, he exhales both "I'm a feminist I even take women studies classes #herstory" and "if she breathes she's a thot" energy also he has 0 style that mullet is simply horrible I bet there's a hairstylist community who considers him a criminal bc like 😐 it is simply so bad (q bit less when it's tied up but when it's all lose jesus Christ)

also touga thinks he's suuuuch a genius, sooo smart like king, I do not care about you at all can you shut the fuck up please and can we tall about the pink haired guy episode?? wack. honestly thought it would be more emotional or something, I binge watched 12 episodes with his ugly haircut face and did not even feel a thing he can choke I guess ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

ANTHY TAKING A SWORD OUT OF UTENA'S CHEST??? OSCAR WORTHY KINGS❗❗❗and then her lame ass brother being like "oh ho ho idk idk" shut up no one cares no one cares I swear to you no one cares shut uuuuup

ep 25-39

first of all, ep 25 was good but kinda reminded me of the nine episodes (13 until 21) where absolutely nothing interesting happened so I hope I'm wrong also can I just say just seeing the preview of the next episode made me roll my eyes so bad I almsot saw my brain?? bc yeah I'm fucking tired of nanami fosuced episodes she's so annoying oh my god nobody cares about a goddamn egg and much less one coming from her let her die or something pls she's so annoying there's nothing I've learned about her that was not against my own will I'm basically rotting over here 🤒

↳ ep 30 has me thinking Akio has a foot fetish or something 😐 bruh leave utena aloooooone I already know your plans and schemes you're not fooling anyone that's embarrassing for u and also... utena you're not very bright are you.... you start seeing every duelist you face with the same exact car and then when you see akio has the same car you didnt even stop to think about it that 1+1 equals 2 ... girl help yourself 😐

↳ yet again another nanami focused ep 😐😐😐😐😐 even though I do understand her better now I still don't find her particularly enjoyable to watch, call me a woman hater but like. idk she's still a bit annoying to me (but touga is straight up evil and is manipulating her so I feel bad for feeling like that tho.....)

↳ ok last 2 eps to go but listen. I thought the akio duel would have happened much sooner, maybe on ep 33 max but well didn't this age well lmao ngl, it did seem a bit too slow paced for my personal taste but also I feel like there's a certain level of drama that comes with slowing the pace down....

↳ aaaaaa yall I'm kinda 😢😭 over the ending omg........... even though it took the best of me to keep going in some parts I still enjoyed the ending aaaaa I thought i wouldnt really like it bc I just usually dont enjoy this type of ending but stil 😢😢😢😢 wait for me utena 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 girl I cried and then anthy walking in the end god utena and anthy holding hands 😭😭😭😭 akio can suck my dick

there's obviously many things I've missed or that I kinda didnt really pay attendance to so please dont take this serious, I was just writing as I watched the episodes so it's more like a thought compilation than anything, still I can see why there's many essays written about it and why it is held as a masterpiece by so many people

[fightevilandthengetblownup]

Chats

- - -

(The Curious Case Of Shadow Lives: Or How I Learned To Love The Bomb (LOL)

Crowley gets too distracted in my head - I dont know why.

Grey’s thinking that if Crowley wants him to have a spine then he has to deal with Grey being disobedient

“That’s fine, so long as he also stamps down on his pets disobedience”   frioedkrf I thought you left!  Tell Crowley to stop calling Jo ‘Grey’s pet’ to her face to try and upset her and Grey.

Grey’s never going to be outright lording over Jo

He’s really not. Though I think everyone else expects Jo to be doing it to him…

Except for Shada.

And Crowley. And DJ.

Shada’s puzzled why he neither treats her like a pet or food

She still doesnt get it?

Nope

…She getting /any/ warmer?

Not really.  Even if she measure his feelings for Jo to her feelings for Gray she’d be confused since she wants to boss Gray around

* STATUS: Away

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* STATUS: Online

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Well, maybe she should view Grey as Gray in that situation and what would she expect from Gray in terms of feelings if he were to return hers?

Devotion, loyalty, providing her with babies, probably not a good comparison

….. *gets stuck on the third one* …how… uh… does she think male humanbodied things are like seahorses?

No she’d expect him to ditch the meatsuit

…And then…  …..Jo is now asking how shadows even reproduce, because she knows Grey and Gray’s thing is 'not normal’ - not that she.. well now she’s disturbed at the thought of Gray being Grey’s child so someone needs to explain to her quickly.

LOL they have little litters.  Not having an actual gender means any shadow can get pregnant with the right circumstances as long as there is one more dominant and one more submissive

Jo is now picturing them as seahorses herself. …And wants to know if litters is like the 4-6 of puppies and kittens, or the many more like other animals and is surprisingly interested in this topic.

6-12 because how else would there be so many so fast?  And they dont really take care of the little spawn just let them run around and do whatever

* STATUS: Away

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* STATUS: Online

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…… “So like turtles…or spiders… or frogs?”

Yes

Intruiging.  Are shadows more on the mate-for-life end of things or the highly polygomous-bordering-on-mass-orgy type of species?

Polygomous although the dominant ones would like their mates to be monogamous without being monogamous themselves.

So pretty much - what Gray wants from a relationship is the general dominant outlook?

Yes

It also showed with Grey’s attitude at the beginning

That’s true - cocky little bastard he was. XD

*nods*

And the submissive ones actually want..?

To be allowed to run around as much as the dominant ones which makes for problems.

…so shadow 'relations’ aren’t exactly the most functional of all of them…

Nope

Another exmple of how Grey goes against the shadow-grain, or would he still want to do that if it wouldn’t cause problems at all..?

He wouldnt want to do that anymore he’s sort of… Now that there’s the idea of it being meaningful and love and everything that’s what he wants

So if there wasn’t a chance for whatever relationship he was in being meaningful and having love and everything would he?     And on the flip, does he think that that’s what he’s got now, or is going to get to?

Nope.  Grey doesnt want to be the one stuck with someone that’s not taking it seriously, he’d just call it off.  He does that that that’s what he and Jo have just not quite on the romantic level yet.

*nodnod* Sounds like him. while Gray would like it if he was able to have a monogmous girlfriend but screw about (or be free to), right?    Makes sense, and is true.

Definitely Gray would love that.

It’s sort of amusing how little Gray has ever actually screwed around though..

He didnt really have a lot of options.  I mean Jo wanted nothing to do with him, he didnt want Crowley, and he doesnt want to screw something he’d normally kill

So basically, if Jo didn’t want nothing to do with him that would have been his choice if he could get away with it without having Anna be crazy?

Yep

…how do they know whose the dominant one and the submissive one, or are there very like clearcut lines of which would be which in their species?

(Whats funny is most of these are coming from Jo but in more just half words.. she’s honestly curious about the shadows.. >_>)

Never clear cut lines.  Take Shada and Gray for example, she wants to be dominant.  He naturally is dominant.  Problems arise.

In their measure of things, or if he was still oeprating under their views of things, which would Grey be more likely? And does that mean Shada would be less dominant even though she wants to be and could be in different circumstances?

Grey’d be the submissive.  He was with Crowley he kind of is with Jo it’s just his nature.  Yes?  I’m not sure what exactly you mean

*nodnod* Makes sense.   …Im not sure what exactly I mean either.

Did you mean she could dial it back?  Because she really could she just doesnt want to

I think I meant that between her and Gray, she’d be the submissive one, but with other shadows she could possibly be the dominant one?

Oh.  Well yeah.

*nodnod* Makes sense

…Jo thats not a question I’m going to ask…mainly because I’m not sure anyone has a real answer for that nor do they want to think about it.

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“How do they even… … …..yeah”  was the exact phrasing of it

Well let’s put it this way, don’t think about it

I’m not but from the twitching I think she’s trying to.

Oh god no.  Jo dont it’ll break your brain

I cant tell if she was asking how they mate or how they birth, and I cant tell which would be worse

She doesnt need to think about it

Like I say, she’s curious. Though why doesnt she need to? *eggs her on seeing if she’ll turn purple*

Because unless she wants to see it she shouldnt worry?

…yep nope, I dont think she wants to see it. At all.    …Again Jo, not asking that…

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….she had a sudden influx of questions including: have any of them actually had 'kids’ or whatever the offspring is called (that’s more at Shada and Grey), how weird is the way of human sex in comparrison, and then she’s just still for some unknown reason trying to think about it but as abstractly as possihle and its making everyone laugh at her

I’d go with spawn and Grey and Shada do not have any.  Grey’s saying it’s not that weird once you get used to the aspect that everythingis physical in a human body and then he’s telling her to stop thinking about it and Shada’s inviting her to watch if she wants to know when she “eventually” gets Gray

* STATUS: Away

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30 min til I g2g btw

* STATUS: Online

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The cheerful “Like frogs!” at the word spawn is all kinds of wrong, DJ.  So theirs isn’t just a physical thing? Because they dont really have bodies per say.   ….Jo is declining Shada’s invitation. Completely. Because no.   Thoughnowshe'soverthinkingthewords'notthatweird'and I’m just going to go bury my head in the sand.

Thats cool, I probs need to go then too

Nope they dont have physical bodies how could it be a physical thing.  And Grey’s saying everything is weird at first getting a meatsuit then later it becomes not weird.  Is she happy now?

Too true, too true.   ….yes? A little petulantly, but yes. You were asking Jo, don’t get weird - plus you know its true and completely rational.

Grey’s facepalming and kicking himself because that’s so not what he meant

Yeah she knows that, doesn’t mean she didn’t take it wrong for a split second originally. He doesn’t need to kick himself, Jo’s just an idiot and she fully agrees that she is.

LOL she’s adorable.

She’s a dumbass.    Again Jo Im no- you’re just going to tell me to share anyway so Im going to save us both some time and let Jo ask her stupidly stupid question about which would either the boys say is more enjoyable from what they have heard since they …haven’t(?).. experienced said shadowsex (*trolls and backfires on self* urgh brain I dont want to think about it)

“Physical.” That was Gray for course.  His opinion matches Grey but for different reasons.

Of course that was Gray - guessing his reason is because it gives more control and/or means its easier to control? What’s Grey’s?     *shaking head at Jo that that was a question at all*

Grey’s is that he’d never be able to have the kind of relationship he wants at all with shadows

Did you send Jenna the thing?

*nodnod* Makes sense

And then Jo and Anna+Lilith abstractly discuss the binding or unbinding of Gray:

Esplode in 4… 3… 2…. 1

Anna’s..just not dealing with it right now..

she’s going to go and lay down and she’s going to not think about anything

Awww

Jo’s just like “She’ll get over it”

no..I don’t think she is

she’s..pretty much putting Jo on Grey’s level right now

…Fun times. Well, Jo’s not going to let that bother her. Anna wouldn’t bind down Gray to let Grey get back his powers if the positions were flipped, so Jo doesnt think she /has/ to in the name of friendship either. She’s also thinking that maybe Anna needs to remember that Gray’s /dangerous/ to the whole world and that she was making it out like it was unreasonable for a /hunter/ to NOT want a

dangerous monster being able to do stuff.

So Jo’s kind of like “…meh”

(sent to Lexy)

Lilith would like to point out that C rowley never said to break the ones on Grey that Gray woud have to be rebound…

True, but the only ones Jo or Grey would be okay with breaking are the feeding ones, maybe the baby surpresent ones, and that would be all of them

so ..then they are actively willing to let Gray stay  bound

Grey would want all of his other powers intact, and Jo refuses to take away protective means from Grey.

If it means grey gets bound

…………….

no Lilith they aren’t listening to you

Hell.. Grey’d be 'okay’ with them if Jo didnt have to carve them into him

Thats what the problem with the feeding one is - that Jo has to hurt Grey to do it and Grey won’t stand for that.

LOL What’s lilith saying?

“Let me explain this in simple little words for the blond ditz…”

“Go for it”

“1. Carve up Grey. 2. Break them on Gray. 3. turn around and break them again on Grey.”

“Got cha. And still. The hurting thing is the problem. Not the actual binding.”

“THEY HEAL!”

that was anna screaming

not lilith

LOL Jo’s saying that’s not the point.

now Anna’s wanting to go a bit postal

It’s the actively harming the other for the sake of Gray - Grey wouldn’t mind actually having a few of his things surpressed, honestly, it’s that Jo has to carve them that’s the issue.

and Lilith is now rolling laughing at her not being the one in the closet

yes she has

Honestly if Jo didn’t have to carve him up - Jo’d have thought of that and suggested it to Grey, at least the ones he’d be interested in and put forth a case of why she’d want to release a few of the other ones (the shadow trapping, moving about and ability to switch meatsuits (but not healing)) on the condition she came and refreed those on him after.

And Anna’s very black and white about Gray, isnt she?

And things when it comes to him.

more..

it’s fucking Grey..who gives a shit..the fucker ccan heal once they are broken again, it’s like a day of pain for them..stupid ass good for nothing waste of space trash..

LOL

If she were in Jo’s position and the situation was flipped - would she be willing to do that for Grey? Bind down Gray for a day.

For Jo..if it meant helping her more than Grey..yes

Even if Gray said 'fuck no’?

And would completely walk out on her for doing it?

it would depend..

On?

and Grey will get over it she says..he’s to co dependant to stay mad for long and Harry’s still straight

LOL But Gray wouldnt get over that sort of breach of trust, and Grey’s barely gotten over Jo just ironing him for a few minutes.

she says she would try harder than Jo to convince Gray to let her help

Jo’s got no way /to/ convince Grey though - he hates Gray, he hates Anna even more, he gets absolutely nothing out of it and gets someone he trusts tearing apart his back for a few hours or more. Jo can’t think of any positives she could give.

“How about because Anna is my friend and you love me?”

“Wouldn’t work. Probably be morre successful not mentioning Anna at all, saying it’d make me happier and less stressed and get me away from Gray quicker, and I’m not going to use that last bit against someone as to why they should do something I ask.”

Gray doesnt actually hate Grey, and he certainly doesnt hate Jo. He’d be more willing to bend than Grey would. Grey hates Anna more than he hates Gray at the moment

“how about then..you do that for them and then you can hold that over their head for the rest of their life..that /you/ saved them.”

“Doubt that would work. But it’s worth a try”      My theory is if Gray could talk to Grey about it he could point out that /Gray/ saved /Jo’s/ life and that either she or Grey owes him.

And she says worth a try, but I doubt she would right now.

lol

“do it for them or Jo goes on Anna’s hit list?”

LOL  "Figured I already was. And it’s not like Grey’s scared of Anna or protecting me"

do it or the starwars collection get it?

….Youre suggesting Jo threatens one of /her/ prized posessions? XD

lol

do it or no more sex?

Again, punishing Jo more probably

Do it or Lilith moves in with you?

…. LMAO Oh lord

*crying*

Lilith just wants to come and play with them doesnt she? /troll

lol she’s just like *shrug* can’t be worse than living with Anna

Lol probably cant be actually

lol

do it or Anna makes a deal with Ruby for Jo to spend the next 10 years popping out kids..

lmao Again, pretty sure thats punishing Jo more

eventually Jo will say fuck it and do it herself to prevent that

I know

do it or Anna moves in with you

LOL Anna’d be dead by the end of a day.   though seemingly, Grey is wanting Jo to put up anti-angel protections around the house

[fireeaglespirit]

@fireeaglespirit @viviane-lefay i do worry sometimes with the stories I write if things might be too much for you. To be fair I dont think in any fanfic Ive ever written anything too explicit but now Im so conscious of other people’s viewpoints and being inclusive that it is a concern. Ultimately I write what I want to/need to but I am aware it might not be for all tastes hence always trying to follow ratings etc.

Replying here so it doesn’t cause any problems with OP, etc..

Ohh. I’m sorry if this worried you.. tbh this was very random and I wasn’t even thinking about fiction when I rb this. This one reminded me of a few times I went out with friends and colleagues and I just felt starkly asexual, lmao

About my tolerance regarding sex and explicitly in fiction, I’ll be honest with you…

There’s hardly anything I could say I wouldn’t read about. I just don’t feel ‘triggers’ or anything of the sort, no hard feelings when it gets to fiction and I value your will to be conscious of other viewpoints but its practically impossible to cater to all tastes like you said, so don’t worry about it much… there’s always someone out there who will feel offended and others who will fiercely love it.

As for myself, I’m very tolerant to sexual content in fiction, idk? I don’t seek it out particularly but its not a deal breaker either.

I know some asexual people are less tolerant, I usually just get a ‘meh’ feeling whenever those subjects are touched in much detail, idk some works do get nasty and bothersome because of much detail involving sexual practices so I just give up on them or put them aside when they bring me no joy but I gladly consume material with sex on it as long as I like some aspects of it. Also, I’m good at ignoring or glossing over things I don’t like in fiction… when I read explicit scenes with intercourse it does nothing to me and my eyes focuses on the sentences I loved such as regarding the feelings between the characters and subtle interactions instead of the physical/carnal aspects of it, and this makes it all worthy it.

Even so, some works might become overwhelmingly depressive or repulsive so I might put them aside even if I enjoyed an aspect of it or I might just skip through them and this happened recently to a series of fantasy books I tried to read which were actually really good but they were so overwhelmingly and unnecessarily dark and had an horrid oppressive atmosphere towards women an sex so I just felt no joy reading them? Its not like I was traumatized by its tone but it felt like a chore and I couldn’t care about it further and no character inspired me whatsoever that the world could change for the better, so I dropped them.

But its not like I’m judging it, I just feel weirded out to some things and I just imagine the kind of mind that takes upon themselves the chore to write a whole series of book which has nothing but suffering and misery in them, especially concerning women, lol. We already had this shit in history and still have in some places in the world so I kinda feel like its not interesting for me to read about it in a fictional setting, especially if I don’t feel like the writer is going to challenge the setting.

But I’m aware most people are much more sensitive… these things can be horrid for those who are more sensitive, and perhaps my own asexuality protects me from feeling it fully as I don’t even think of myself as a being capable of partaking in this (weird, I know), so I have problem even projecting.

But I did felt really strongly for the way women were oppressed absurdly and had their agency completely obliterated, so that sparked a sort of empathy or kinship in me which made progress in such book a chore…

You got my point and this just illustrates a bit my relationship to fiction and things that irk me since you were interested in my opinion… I have another example of fantasy book with lots of sex in it:

I read asoiaf even thought its full of sexual stuff but I don’t feel joy at these parts, yet the work is so good on other themes that I ignore it for the most part… but even so, recently I’ve read F&B and it was kinda overwhelming on the sexist aspect with myriads of female characters turned into child brides and raped and dying at their childbirth repeatedly it just got very tiresome and repetitive near the end, because there where almost no counterpoints to it, unlike in the main series where the situation is dire for women but we have characters challenging it more often and idk. F&B just lacked on that front.

So, this shows a bit my sensitivity towards sex is more related to sexism and the feeling that women are confined to their reproductive aspects: motherhood, childbearing, marriage, sensuality, etc.. I don’t have a problem with sexual intercourse per se as you can see, but that’s from my unique point of view and I know some asexuals are more repulsed towards it, but you asked my opinion…

So, if its consensual sex: its not my cup of tea but I don’t feel like its a deal breaker…

Just to give you a positive sex example: when I see an OTP of mine getting to the point of having sex I think its pretty sweet, like when Jon and Dany consummated their love on that boat… I was happy for them, for all that it means, the symbolism between the union of ice and fire and just two characters which I love dearly, finding happiness and comfort in each other. What’s not to love about it??

This is a rare stance I can say I saw a pair I ship get to that point xD

I love shipping as you know, but its more about the psychological aspects and potential for character development and even when I’m reading fanfic about my OTPs I enjoy more the angst and symbolism than the ‘hot’ parts which usually just makes me go ‘meh’ (again).

So this makes me say: when sex is the focus of works I could feel like I’m too asexual for this, even if it regards an OTP, it just doesn’t have a very exciting effect on me or I’m not explicitly interested in this part of a relationship, when so many other things caught my eye… sometimes subtle interactions and dialogue and and gentle approximation (touches, caresses, kissing, etc..) is so much more exciting for me to read about than the ‘thing’ itself, lol.

To sum it up: when its there just for p*rn or even worse, shock value it just makes me go ‘meh’ or ‘ugh’ or ‘uhh why am I even reading this?’

This reminds me of Vivi’s take on the ‘hiero gamos’, in this case I just say I might even enjoy the theme as long as the scenes involving sex are meaningful and passionate and the aspect I value the most about them are sublime and platonic instead of carnal but I’m aware the carnal aspects are very important for the characters and the audience so I also worry when I get to show my stories people will think they lack sexual content ^^  I get you.

Now that you know my feelings towards sex in fiction, to a broader sense I just wanted to say..

There’s no way to guess people’s sensitives but it doesn’t mean you need to walk on eggshells afraid to trigger people all the time, hell no! I’m all for freedom of creation. At least around me there are no metaphorical ‘eggshells’.

Everyone has their own set of opinions which makes them unique, not just me, I mean…  even so I will let my snowflake syndrome show but I’m quite peculiar if you could say, so I sort of grew a strong ‘carapace’ towards the world as I deal with people with completely different views and values on a daily basis which might make me have inflamed political opinions while at the same time, I’m very flexible and forgiving when it comes to fiction in general.

I don’t expect much of the population to be like this so I’m also self conscious when it gets to writing my own stuff because I know people can feel very strongly about it and you’ve seen the way fandom reacts to minor things and bash creators when they perceive flaws in their work… I’m just not a judgmental person, its not in my nature. I just ignore things in fiction if I don’t like and I became even more relaxed over time in regards to this all, lol I nearly reached a ‘nirvana’ as I don’t even feel strongly negative feelings in regard to this.

Snarky and bitter comments from time to time? Yes… but no hard feelings. RL needs my hatred, lol so I don’t have it to spare with fiction any longer.

Anyway, on an unrelated sub note… as you might have noticed, I don’t feel comfortable about current fandom trends and specially policing, and with reason as this gets very serious and quick with literally ‘wave chain reactions’ of hatred sparked apparently from nowhere. I hope people could create more freely instead of the political correct police and restraining of creativity we have now. It was good for a while and I’m all for diversity and change in status quo (for the better), but I think this has gone too far and I perceive a lot of rigidity in fiction right now due to fear of fandom backlash we have creators afraid to make their thing and afraid it isn’t ‘inclusive or progressive’ enough… so they bend themselves endlessly until fandom ‘approves’ them, but even so someone is bound to scream and say the work is offensive and the cycle of hatred is restarted.

I know this reply was like a huge egocentric monologue and I strained with non related issues at the end, but you asked my thought on this so I tried to convey it with detail.. including things related to the perception we have concerning fictional themes and I just kinda had to vent at some parts of it.

etc…. This doesn’t mean I forbid judgment from others or criticism or that I forbid people from harshly criticizing works of fiction, just that sometimes it gets more harmful than beneficial and scare people off, and I felt like saying that.

Anyway,,, just want to say nonetheless I find it very sweet and considerate that you are taking different opinions in mind while writing, but you don’t need to worry at least from my part, and I don’t think you ever got even close to being explicit in your writings so there’s absolutely nothing to worry about.

[coolmiddlename]

adventure time season 7 part 1 review

aaaaaaaaaa

we finished the king of ooo arc!!!!!! all the way to the end of stakes!!!

anyway as u can tell from my excitement we had a blast. i think this is one of the most emotionally sincere parts of adventure time, and many of the episodes made me laugh far more than i ever did during season 6, so theyve very welcome. yeah, some eps at the start of season 7 are lacking laughs or visual cues due to lazy storyboarding, but there are plenty of excellent parts to make good for it... and the finale totally gripped me.

 lets go through the episodes and try to describe what i found exciting:

Bonnie and Neddy - theres just something really touching about this episode. seeing finn and jake in those armored suits is a little silly but good setbuilding for the king of monarchy the king of ooo is trying to run, and transitioning from finns description about the brilliance of the water to the king of ooo making a scam of it, pretty damn funny. but what was better was the backstory presented in this episode... bonnie descends from the mother gum into a new world full of promise and life, destiny child that she is, whereas neddy experiences terror and overstimulation. and seeing her just... worry about him, get sad when he didnt recognise her but protect him w the song and bring him home, man i loved it

Varmints - i dont think we ever got a bubbline episode THIS expressive before or since, not even in stakes. the humor was SO ON POINT that i was rolling on the ground while the emotional trains of thought the chars were going through was presented so well, there was no ambiguity that wasnt deliberately placed. king of ooo in the costumes was a nice chuckle and also set in place that peebles as a princess had waaaay more power than whatever the “king of ooo” was before to the extent he sees her clothes as symbols of that strength.  i swear hes literally named that by his parents. anyway shes in the denial/bargaining stage of grief and falls into the depression stage after her hat is stolen and she remembers everything she lost, also i love this ep cos they were so EXPRESSIVE. probably the best pb ep...ever? at least until season 8′s jelly beans have power. emotion is something deeply missing from stakes, which ill get into in a moment. 

the other three eps - i wanted 2 make a paragraph for each of the other three eps but they didnt stand out enough... HOWEVER, over time ive come to enjoy the strangely domestic nature of Dirt Beer Guy a lot more, also i like Mama Said for being a sweet lil Canyon ep that goes into what finn and jake think of their new job... Football was the most standout of all, just something unsettling about seeing bmo argue with its own inner psyche i mean football. enjoyable, uncomfortable, cute. 

Stakes - what a heartfelt insight into the past of marceline, her history as a vampire and perspective on the present... lets talk a bit about the strengths and weaknesses of stakes. 

I felt that the miniseries handled Marceline’s past as a vampire hunter, as a young girl who had just been abandoned, and as a toddler with her mother.... it pulled at the heartstrings in a way AT rarely does. my favourite part of this backstory was marceline’s relationship with the bunny girl, who weve come to believe is finn’s ancestor.   

i also felt it was glorious folowup to the season 6 ending and a pretty good use of having all the characters without any responsibilities to the candy kingdom. they went on a vampire hunting adventure together which was sweet.

my favourite scenes of the actual miniseries were the ones that involved the vampires... ice king not being brainwashed was a funny twist that i saw coming immediately, and marceline’s vengeance on her felt real, as did her struggle the moon was intimidating as heck and finn and jake were so bad at taking her out. the heirophant’s transformations were really cool, thanks emily partridge for that, and the VAMPIRE KING? hooo boy. star of the show. everything he did was just so wackyzany and unpredictable, and yet so meditated that it feels like he may be the greatest thinker in the show. he reminds me of zaheer, talking to a frustrated korra. since marceline looks and acts like korra throughout this miniseries the comparison is strong.

as for other elements, my favourite parts were the ones where pb either did something goofy or morbid or fucked up the king of ooo. if looks could kill... “A MONARCHY IS NOT A DEMOCRACY!!!” BAM. so satisfying.  and all the candy people hugging her, and her lil breakdown over marcy while pepbut prepares the magic. PEPPERMINT BUTLER, this miniseries sealed my love for him which only grew after Jelly Beans Have Power in season 8. 

the funiest part of this miniseries were finn and jake, and the best episode was Checkmate. the fart speech scene got so many laughs out of me and then peeblles joined in and said it waS EMERGENCY TALK ONLY AND THEN THE VAMPIRE KING HOLDS HIS NOSE OUT OF STENCH and yeah for all the above reasons, the vampire king, the humor,  Checkmate is the best episode. All of Finn and Jake’s other scenes were also amazing. they were fucking useless in this miniseries which, apparently, is where their humor shines most. 

...which leads to my CRITICISM: a lack of expression and humor during key scenes. this is mostly related to marceline, but also to bubblegum esp at the start. there were many scenes that held the same angle for to long where they were talking about their feelings, but their faces werent changing, and it was just... visually uninteresting, didnt feel as expressive as it could have been, especially after the brilliant faces in Varmints. marceline is usually such an expressive character, seeing her standing still and rambling was so meh. which is why her flashback scenes - so full of character - are superior to any scene shes in within the present day. i mean, jesus, she literally says she feels love for pb in the most deadpan and blande way. peebles can get away with it, cos she has some KILLER faces later (that one at the king of ooo) and has always been relatively expressionless, also her actions speak volumes. marceline’s strongest expressions (in the present) were when she desperately tried to kill the Empress and the Vampire King, which makes them my favourite scenes for her. 

i think Everything Stays is the defining song of adventure time. It encapsulates our experience with the whole show; AT usually builds up dramatic plots, only to anticlimactically return to the “status quo”, but what we realise later is that everyone is still affected, everyone is still changing. the princess has her kingdom back, but she’s not going to take her position for granted anymore, and has averted from her dark path for now. ice king is still the ice king, but he’s now building up some friends and finding genuine happiness in the land of ooo. finn lost his father again and got his arm back (for the time being), but he feels way less burdened by his emotions that he used to, far more grown. and the same goes for marceline... even though shes a vampire again, shes no longer as burdened by her past. she’s come to terms with it. 

even though the characters return back to normal at the end of stakes, islands, elements, the things they have gone through will remain with them and shape who they become. in recent times? we have been seeing the effects of Elements on the characters of Ooo. how far they’ve been affected we are yet to see, and im excited to find out. 

[pharaohkiller]

Eurovision 2017 - i know i'm late to the party

Israel: They took the “Breaking me to pieces” line literally when preparing a background, love it. He’s so charming and radiates an energy that suits the stage. But, not a fan of the song, as there are a lot of songs that go along the beat of the song. Sorry hon, 4/12

Poland: She reminds me of Ellie Goulding, and the piano in the background sounds very similar to Fifty Shades of Grey soundtrack and another film that I cannot remember at the moment. She has a pleasant voice which she hit amazing high notes. Still can’t get over the fact that it sounds like it was ripped off of many movie soundtracks. Sorry love, 5/10 (one extra point for having dogs in the trailer-y thingy, dogs are always an extra point.)

Belarus: They. Are. So. Cute. The guitar that is covered with lace has me dead, I have war flashbacks to my grandmother’s house where every surface has these stuff. These two have amazing energy that reflects on the audience and now I just want to kick some ass with my significant other with this song in the background for some reason? Like it’s not a song for kicking ass and I don’t have a significant other but that is so not the point lol. This song is just pure, I love it and you can bet your ass I so am downloading it. (The kiss at the end thoughh, I ship it.) 7/12

Austria: He is soo charming and those sneakers are dope af, is he roleplaying as Hermes ‘cause I can see myself casting him in my PJO fanfics if I ever get around writing one lol. Oh and, the kid from the Dreamworks logo is all grown up now, feel old yet? The clouds in the back are so aesthetically pleasing. The song itself is a whole another thing. The “I’ll swim like a champion” line seems off, as if they couldn’t find a better fitting synonym or word in its place, overall the song is repeating itself a lot. His cute face that is smiling throughout the song is definitely a plus, and he does have a pleasant voice, but a girl’s gotta get her Judge Judy on. My verdict on the song, therefore, iiiis *drum roll* 4/12

Armenia: I love it. For some reason, I truly am enjoying this performance. The only thing that is bothering me is the constant camera cuts like dudes why?? The lyrics are kinda meh but the dancers were good too. But, will I download it? Nope, sorry queen. 5.5/12

The Netherlands: The harmonizing, the outfits are all fan-freaking-tastic. Literal queens. The song though, is not my piece of cake and the lyrics are not eritten by a genius as it seems like the writer(s) was given the prompt ‘cry no more, turn the page and start again’ and literally revolves around the line, and I quote “Never cry no more”. Sorry babes, 2.5/12

Moldova: I’m a sucker for saxophones. They have a plus one, it’s for the saxophone. Did I mention I love saxophones? Especially in Eurovision songs (tbt the Epic Sax Guy). I love everything about this performance, the background, the dancing, the flower microphones, the sax solo, the dress transformation, the violin - this is my jam for the rest of my life. Play it at my funeral and I’ll rise from the dead to do the leg thing. I don’t even care about the repetition of lyrics or anything. The hype is real y'all, the hype is real. 9/12

Hungary: Let me address the hair and the outfit and then I’ll go on. HE HAS A MAN BUN. HIS OUTFIT LOOKS LIKE IT WAS OUT OF WELCOME TO THE BLACK PARADE ALBUM AND MV, he is a small bean and needs to be protected. I don’t understand the lyrics but that minor detail doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy this masterpiece. This 👏is👏a👏master👏piece👏 . The violin, the dancer, the RAP PART (that is 100% better than anything Jake Paul ‘rapped’), the instrument that I don’t recognise, the choreography, his voice.. literally everything. 11/12

Italy: Before the performance, the fucking opening credits. It’s a fucking masterpiece. Has anyone talked about it yet? If y'all didn’t I’m judging you. And that suit, the rainbow side thingy. The rainBOW like, damn I love it. FUCKING HARAMBE. AND THE WIGGLES, FOR FUCK’S SAKE, the whole song is a meme. Again, language is a problem pour moi, however, I really like it. We really should talk about the fucking Harambe and Wiggles thing. I just can’t. The “Omm” ending thiough, thanks a lot dude. Much meme, such voice. 8/12

Denmark: Okay first of all, the queenest queen of them all in this year’s Eurovision. The dress, the voice, her vocal range, those high notes, the song, that adorable face. I can’t really relate to the song in a romantic way but hell yeah I’m going to play around with the meaning so that I can relate and give the queen her rating. I have it on my phone as I’m typing this. I love this, I love her. 11/12 - biased (kind of) - / unbiased; 9.5/12

Portugal: Let me address this, he looks really uncomfortable and anxious to be in such a position where he is the centre of attention. I saw a lot of hate directed towards him with people saying that he looks like a rat, has no stage appeal and that kind of stuff. From where I’m looking, he looks like the kind of introvert who prefers to stay within their comfort zone but are passionate about arts that require a lot of human interaction as well as clashing with their own personal limits. Here, it’s singing. You can physically see on his face how relaxed he becomes as the first notes to the song his sister wrote are released into the crowded stadium, he gets relaxed as the time goes on. Compared to his state before getting up to the stage where he was stiff and looked like he wanted to crawl up to a corner and hide, he looks so in peace as he releases his soothing voice into the dark night. I kinda refuse to look at the translation of the words as I fear the magic will dissappear but that is on me. It sounds like it belongs to a rom-com with Ryan Gosling as the lead male or a Disney movie, and, as I said the same for Denmark, I have the song on my phone and it is such a delight to listen to. I am unable to describe how this song affects me, my words come out in lame sentences, not magnificent enough to match the magnificence of the song. And, apart from saxaphones, I’m a sucker for greenery in general so the background pleases my eyes. Moreover, those assholes on Youtube complaining on how he shouldn’t have won the competition and it’s all for political reasons, shut your whiny asses that listen to lyrically poor songs in the trend list on Spotify, and drop your popular wannabe persona and just listen to this masterpiece. A genuine 12/12 from the deepest corners of my heart.

Azerbaijan: That fucking horse thing, fuck that mask. (My Starkid fangirl can’t help this so bear with me) “Oh I feel ready, at my skeletons. Have my lungs, my millions” has me imagining Umbridge singing this song in the Forbidden Forest before the, how do I phrase this, ‘thing’ with Firenze and the overall centaurs, and boy do I want to close the tab and question my imagination right now. Anyways, those ‘bad boy’s are going to be the end of me, all I can think of is the stupid Wattpad stories. Overall the song has an interesting vibe to it, to say the least. However, not my jam for this summer gals, pals and non-binary friends. 5/10

Croatia: My man, my friend. He is a cute cinnamon roll that needs to be protected. The going up the stairs bit in the opening credits is me. This whole performance is a huge meme itself, what is it with Eurovision and memes this year, I feel like the only missing thing from this whole event is ‘cash me ousside’ and Pepe the Frog. Bet someone cracked open a cold one with the boys in the back lol. Anyways back to this precious human being, his voice has me shook. His vocal range is amazing, reminds me of Brendon Urie somewhy. The way he says miracle makes me think of a certain Ryan Higa video and I just need a moment. Also, “There are only two ways to live your life” makes me think of Britney Spears, I think I’m the living meme machine at this point. Imagine you otp performing this, I’m wheezing. The background is ground breaking. I really cannot function properly at this point, it’s 3:18 a.m. and watching this masterpiece. Can we talk about that iconic ‘Yes!’? 8/12

Australia: First of all, the jokes were made last year but I have to do it again, why the fuck is Australia performing in Eurovision? Next up we will have BTS performing for Southern Korea and Baby Metal from wherever they’re from. In the end I feel like this whole event will turn into a party where America is the only one invited. He looks like the model everyone obsesses over in Pinterest. Can we have a minute to obsess over his voice please? It’s like honey, or fine wine. The background is meme worthy, but good lol. 7/12 and would definitely listen to it again sometime.

Greece: She reminds me of Alexandra Daddario mixed with a Greek Goddess. She’s probably the only person that can pull that dress off. The song feels like David Guetta, Calvin Harris or Martin Garrix had a chance to play with it before it was distributed to public. 6/10

Spain: A group made up of boys that are nice to look at, who wouldn’t give them 12/12 right? That evil heartless witch is me. The fact that the boys are cute does not erase the huge high note failure. I cannot get over it, I can’t look past it. Everytime I look at the boy, I can’t help myself and I get into hysterical laughter. It’s a precious moment, and I will laugh at it ‘till the day I die. Sorry boys, 3/12 for the overall song, infinity out of 12 for that failure.

Norway: What the fuck is that mask. What is the thing with weird shit and Eurovision. And please someone explain me what the fuck are those effects and jump cuts. His voice is lovely, and I like the song. Will probably download the song whenever I remember lol. That microphone stand gives me lifee along with the purple aesthetic. 7/12

United Kingdom: Can we take a moment to appreciate her. She is so pure with her voice and her looks. I also must point out that one of the three lyricists (is that a word? i dont know) is *the* Emmelie de Forest. Another fucking queen of Eurovision for those who are unaware. By the way, “I will never give up on you.” is such a line, my gal, let me introduce you to Brexit, oh and, “Together we’ll dance through this storm.” I bet that storm is Theresa May lol. Nice song, nice facial expressions, nice background effects - simple but effective. 8/12

Cyprus: [minus the trnc but whatevs] The song starts and all I can think of is Rag'n'Bone Man’s Human mixed with a pinch of Blues Saraceno’s River. It’s bugging me a lot ‘cause I feel like there’s another song I can’t name. The high note was good but overall it’s a meh from me. I will not give any rating to it, I hate when Eurovision contestants rip off actual songs.

Romania: One word, memetastic. I love this and everything it offers to the audience. It also reminds me of Barclay from Stereo Kicks. Man, the yodels get me everytime, I love this clash of cultures as well as that weird kiss in the end lmao. 6/12

Germany: Right off the bat, Titanium by David Guetta and Sia. The singer is cute and has a nice voice but just like I did to Cyprus, I’m not going to rate it.

Ukraine: Again, Eurovision with weird shit. What is that hat, someone explain it to me. I fucking love the song though, it’s my piece of cake. Can we talk about the band please? They need love and are underrated in my opinion.

Belgium: I can’t name the song, but this is another rip-off. Shame really, her voice is lovely as well as herself.

Sweden: Just meme it, you know you want to. He reminds me of Felix (Pewdiepie if you wereliving under a rock for a while) for some reason? The song feels as if it was written for Robin Thicke originally. The dancers are the ones that are frickin’ beautiful. We are blessed with their presence. 4/12

Bulgaria: If I’m not remembering wrong he is one year older than me; he is performing in Eurovision as a finalist and I’m writing about him at 4:32 in the morning like can I have my break-out as an actress yet? No? Okay. Anyways, let me make this clear, I’m a teenage girl and he is attractive, plus has a mind-blowing voice, thus, I may have created a bias of some sort. Do I look like a heartless bitch that will deduct points from this amazing human being just 'cause I can’t relate to the lyrics? Not when this otherworldly person is the source of conflict at hand. I can’t wait for him to drop an album, I need more of his voice. Two songs aren’t enough, I want more, I need more. That little “Thank you.” at the end, I’m indeed fangirling. 12/12

France: I’m not as good as I was two years ago regarding the French language and it makes me sad. She is adorable and her voice is also very nice to listen to.