#dont get me wrong i dont mind and ik i probably need to lay off

[autosarcophagy-avaritia]

I cant tell if apologizing is annoying to them, or its because ‘you did nothing wrong’

[fleursbending]

THE TAILS OF TSU'TEY AND TONOWARI. | 18+

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 : do you see that pun ?? isn't it so funny ?? ^^ hahahahaahahahahahha.. okay here u go whores have sum headcanons 🙏🏼‼️‼️ (i was gonna link the jake sully one but i think everyone and their mom has seen it). this filthy asf i did not hold back. my mind ran and fell out of my ass. edit / ok the bullet points were glitching out for wari but i'm hoping it is okay now!

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 : MDNI, nsfw, UHMM seggsy times with blue big ass aliens idrk what else to say ?!?!? choking, overstim, brief degrading, mention of somnophilia & oral (f! receiving).

✰ 𝐓𝐎𝐍𝐎𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐈 :

wari knew you were drawn to his tail, for a differing amount of reasons. one of them being that it made you feel really good

and he'd be so consumed by making you feel good, because you're his girl. your pleasure tops everything for him

like his tail is so thick in and the width of it is so girthy lord

"take it like the good girl you are." he'd say as he forces you beneath him and lets his tail gravitate up your leg to where you need him most

i just see his tail acting before he can even fully think of what he was about to do

whether it is in his possessive nature, or just watching out for you

he'd totally use the width and thickness of it to his advantage come on. probably would let it lay in between your plushy thighs and press it against your throbbing clit.

"ahh" he'd say, as he would spit in your mouth - making you swallow it as you grind down on his tail.

I'm not sure how sensitive the metkayinas tails would be considering how different they've adapted to their surroundings, but i'd like to think

if you were to tug on it, it'd still elicit a deep guttural grown from tonowari

he'd fist your hair and smash your lips against his, nibbling at your bottom lip

"yeah? is all of this mine?" he'd growl, hands groping your ass and squeezing it.

wari would whisper such filth to you as his lips hover right over yours, basking in your whines and moans that waver in differing octaves.

"what's wrong, sweetheart? can't take anymore? why? oh...-" he'd let out a low chuckle. "is that it? i don't care. keep going."

his tail would be like. undeniably smooth.. so imagine thigh riding but switch thigh with tail lol!

some of y'all gonna be like wtf!! but dont lie to me ik some of u guys are eating that concept up

like him gripping your hips and pulling you up and down, other hand trailing down to press his thumb on the pearl of your clit and gently just rubs

or when you've made him fucking angry he'd use his tail as some sort of fuck toy until your legs are too sore to keep going.

like he'd give you such a condescending glare, "what? you're spent? when did i tell you to stop?"

tonowari is a beefy man, and with all that strength lordddd you're all gonna be going at it for quite some time !!

like ik for a fact he'd make you use his tail to get off until you reach the point of pure exhaustion

he'd let out a booming laugh, making you comfortable as he just towers over you

"guess it's my turn now"

and his cock would just be so ready for your cunt

and he'd coo at you as you let out something akin to a scream and a cry as your poor lil hole is finally filled with himmm and his balls would just smack at your skin lorddd

there'd be instances where you'd go on midnight swims and his tail would just curve into your waist pushing you closer to his proximity.

he'd have a wolfish grin as your chest presses into this, hands palming at every inch of your skin.

and as things get more heated, more desperate. you'd begin to tug him back to shore, to head to your shared mauri.

but he'd insist with a shake of his head, grasping below your thighs and wrapping them around his waist.

his head would dip down then, hovering over your ear. his breath making the hairs on the back of your head stand.

"how about i just take you here?" like! ok yes pls-

i can just imagine his tail sometimes pushing the ends of your hair back so he could have access to your chest, kissing you everywhere.

like not to deter but tonowari is such a boobs guy like he'd fr suck on your nipples while bucking into you real deep.

mans has such a high sexdrive like, he's going to crave you constantly. especially if he didn't have a successful hunt, or people in the clan are way to up his ass that day.

either he'd fuck you into oblivion, or just sit back and let you use him however you wish.

his tail swishes ever so slightly at the mere thought of you, that's the affect you have on him.

he doesn't know if it's possible but the next thing on his kink list is to definitely somehow choke you with his tail as he fucks you.

you'll have more than enough time together alone, (especially on your night escapades) for him to really test those, so be ready

✰ 𝐓𝐒𝐔'𝐓𝐄𝐘 :

let me just say. he'd be gripping your throat as his lips are so precise with the way they kiss yours in that very moment

and you wouldn't acknowledge it at first as he leans in closer to you. not even realising his tail that trails up your leg

but then it would tug at your loin cloth. once to check how tightly it is on. two to check the waters. 3 to rip it right off of you.

and you'd gasp in shock as the cool air hits your already wet pussy

tilting his head, a coy smirk graced his lips as his forefinger ever so softly dragged through your folds

"ah, what have i done to already make you this wet. do tell."

your hips would jolt then, desperate for more friction, for him to fill you up

the smirk would drop, tsking at you as one of his large hands would push down on your lower tummy to keep you settled

you'd take a deep inhale of breath, both your eyes following the tail that once again trailed up your leg

this time it'd wrap itself around your breasts, squeezing. it was pure erotic, back arching and everything.

the smoothness and how sleek it was, the way it pressed down on your chest - had your eyes closing in pure utter ecstasy

"that's right, use it like it's my cock. there you go, baby. yes." he'd urge you when you are having sex

he'd be very watchful of your reactions, solely just wanting to please you and make you feel good

like can you imagine at a bonfire one night, tsu'tey had gone off to get your food

you're just happily waiting for him when suddenly another man from the clan approaches, trying to seduce you to follow him to the forest

you'd respectfully declined, knowing that of his true intentions behind his words - but he wasn't seeming to go without staking a claim on you

did he live under a rock? oh no tsu-tey

tsu'teys hands are preoccupied, anger making his posture stiffen ever so more as he quickened his pace over to you

"i am taken, i have a mate. please leave before he-"

he makes himself known from behind you, balacing the food on his hands as he uses his tail to smack the wrist of the mans hand that was trying to make its way to your face

"you heard her, leave. before i take out all your teeth and beat you to-"

"tsu'tey!" you'd hiss, arms wrapping around his waist.

he'd snap out of it, glowering at the pathetic excuse of a man as he scampered off.

your cheeks flush as you realised his tail now seemed to wrap itself right above your loin cloth - an action he'd do unintentionally when feeling possessive

after your meal,, let's just say he was still starving for some more

the way he'd restrict your hand by his tail, or how the swishing motion of it would tenderly linger on your legs when he'd devour your pussy

"shhh, don't want the rest of the hunting party to you hear you. unless you do?" he'd say as he had you against a tree and completely having his way with you

i can see his tail having a mind of its own while he's asleep sometimes,, like he'd be having quite a vivid dream of you

and suddenly his tail would just be pressed against you, in a tired haze you'd try to ignore the pressure

but with tsu'tey spooning you and now unintentionally rutting against you, his tail seems to be growing in sensitivity as it curls against you

the feeling of the fur at the end of it brushing your upper thighs is what would finally jolt you awake

i can just imagine his tail trailing down the dip in your spine as you ride him, or the best part

when you'd surprise him by tugging on it

it'd happen at those times where its your turn to take control during your nighttime charades,, yk y'all like to switch it up

just a lil tug is all it takes sometimes

he'd harshly bite down on his bottom lip, "y'n" he'd let out in a low growl that makes you clench and squeeze down on his cock even more

eyes rolling to the back of his head, jaw and thighs clenching in sheer pleasure as the feeling of it equates to that of him teetering over the age of bustin

he'd definitely use his tail to choke you out when you're about to cum

i just feel like tails can do so much more than depict the emotions he is feeling at that very moment

he'd honestly use it however way you wish for him too as long as you're fine with it and it makes you feel good

like him fucking you from behind as his hands grip at your ass and his tail wraps around your hair and tug on it...??? damnnn

𝒇𝒍𝒆𝒖𝒓𝒔𝒃𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈 ━━━ 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟑

⤷ feedback and reblogs are always much appreciated ! feel free to ask through my inbox if you would like to join my nsfw taglist. ♡

also i am sorry if this is bad </3 she was written at like 3am last night!

[elysianslove]

cheering you up ; haikyuu boys

synopsis; different ways the haikyuu boys care for you and cheer you up when you’re sad

pairings; karasuno x reader, nekoma x reader, aoba johsai x reader, fukurodani x reader, shiratorizawa x reader, inarizaki x reader

genre; fluff

warnings; none probably a bunch of mistakes lmfao

note; i had to repost this like 3 times rip. anyways, im sorry for not adding inarizaki on my last one jbshds but they’re here now!!

karasuno ━━

sugawara koshi; i definitely think he's so in tune with you, and your emotions. he learns your cues very well, and knows every little thing about you that there is to learn. if you're having a bad day, he'll notice right away. he won't comment on it though. all he'll do is these little things to try to cheer you up, but it's going to be very subtle. he'll let u rest ur head on his shoulder, run his fingers through ur hair. he'll sneakily buy u ur favorite snack. doesn't bring anything up until you do. ends the day with cuddles and a chick flick.

sawamura daichi; he notices but he doesn't really know how to react. not because he doesn't know what to do, but because he doesn't want to trigger you or deepen your sadness in any way. he's very careful with you. if it's something throughout the day, he's very quiet and tender with you, just silently lets you rest your head against his chest and rubs your back/arm tenderly. as you're walking home he asks if you want to talk about it, and reminds you that it's good to, but it's also okay if you don't want to.

nishinoya yuu; not a single sad moment with mr noya here. seriously you cannot breathe. ok but in all honesty, when you're sad. he's sad. sends you memes, and you'll be laughing at them with tears streaming down your face because you don't really know what you're feeling anymore. he does a lot of tiktok trends with you, any of the couple ones. grabs your faces and ,,, smooch all over. until you have no choice but to laugh. if you want to cry even more, he'll watch the notebook and the vow a thousand times over, and be a sobbing mess next to you. just don't tell the guys okay? <3

kageyama tobio; he's so.   bad. at this please help him. like he can tell ur sad, bc he's v good at reading people. but like. what the fuck is he supposed to do. anyways. when u two get to be alone and he kinda notices how quiet you are, he just nudges you slightly, and pulls you to him. it's easier to talk to you, he's calmer, when he can't directly look at you. when he feels you start to shake in his arms, feels the wet tears down your cheeks as you start to sob in his arms, his heart kinda breaks. all he can do is hold you, but it's what you need. and he'll listen too, if that's what you need as well.

tsukishima kei; i think he notices, but doesn't bring it up at all. the way he goes about it is he'll tease you to try and bring a smile on your face. because this is tsukki, and you know him well enough, you know the truth behind his jabs, enough to appreciate them. if it doesn't work, he'll just start to make fun of people in front of you, pointing random people out with you and just being like "wanna bet on what's making their relationship fall apart" this sadist i stg. like suga, he subtly makes you feel better until you yourself approach him about whatever's upsetting. actually gives 10/10 advice bc he's v honest.

asahi azumane; he's so empathetic oh my god bruh. notices immediately. "baby what's got u so upset" w a big pout on his face and when u just mumble "nothin" so low he barely catches it and instead throw yourself into his arms, he gives you a big, certified asahi bear hug. doesn't leave your side at all. constantly mutters sweet nothings and encouragements. if you do the bare minimum like make it through class he'll meet you after and be all "im so proud of my pretty baby". cuddles all day. all night. he's not very good at advice but he is the best listener !!! so attentive and you'll feel a huge weight lifted.

tanaka ryunosuke; "aight who do i need to jump" type beat. u love him so much though. that one sentence and sentiment already has you feeling better. immediately hugs you so tight, borderline suffocating you. "wanna ditch school". 100% willing to do so. he doesn't really know whether to approach it with distracting you or facing the obstacle head-on, but he finds a middle ground. eats your feelings out with you. saeko pulls out the embarrassing ryu pictures and suddenly you don't know why you were ever sad.

hinata shoyo; is really oblivious for a bit tbh. when he first meets you at the start of the day and his hyperactive self is greeted by your duller, sadder self, he doesn't think much of it. it's when you don't react to him or interact with him the way you usually would that he starts to notice you being off. he's actually super straightforward about it, and approaches you with some of your favorite snack that he bribed ukai to give him for free and just "wanna tell me whats up, baby?" he's so, so easy to talk to. immediately you're venting. and he listens to intently, gives stupidly good advice. it's like such simple approaches to your problem but?? it works. anyways you love him.

yamaguchi tadashi; will be super worried about what he could do to make it better, and kinda just tries to feed you as much positive energy as he can. once he's comfortable with people, he becomes really chatty, so i see him talking your ear off with the biggest smile on his face that you have no choice but to kind of ? mimic it? he just radiates goodness and sweetness that it shifts your own energy. he on some witchcraft shit on god. anyways when he walks you home or something, he'll just stop for a min and avoid your eyes when he says "ik u dont feel the best, but i dont want you to have to hide that from me, okay?" stan tadashi <3

nekoma ━━

kuroo tetsurō; drops everything. i mean it. i genuinely think kuroo would be such a good boyfriend that he'll sense it and text u as ur getting ready for school and be like "are u sad i feel like ur sad". you dont really wanna worry him and you'll just reassure him ur fine but he's already at your front door in — not his school uniform. insists the two of you take the day off saying "its fine babe im super smart". you two will spend the whole day just simply existing, talking when needed, he listens to you if you vent, and tries to come up with as many options of solutions for you so you don't feel weighed down. he'll make sure you eat even if you don't have an appetite, and will try to make u do something productive bc in a lotta cases, it could help you feel a lil better yk :)

kozume kenma; i pretend i do not see it — kozume kenma (2020). jbwjwks im jk. he's like tsukki in the sense that he will never address it, and he doesn't outwardly approach you about it. if it's just an off day for you, and you also happen to not have school, you'll go over to his house, hoping to feel a little bit better when you see him. "can i have a kiss, sunshine" to which he responds "why." you just go "im sad" and he gives u a big smooch. he'll have you lay on his lap while he plays his games, occasionally just sneaking in a peak at you to make sure you're okay. he'll ask if you wanna play to get your mind off things for a while. eventually, when things wind down a bit, he'll just mutter "yk i love you, yeah?" and that lights up your world hehe

haiba lev; as soon as he notices you're sad he just ☹️. he picks out a small flower and as soon as he sees you, he just tucks it by your ear, and smile so brightly and youll just be like "oh my god lev please stop being so cute". he won't really know what to do tbh, but the way he's so lost makes it so heartwarming and it honestly cheers you up all on its own. he just. "would a kiss make it better" and if you nod he'll just start kissing all over your face so softly, until he finally kisses your lips. when he pulls away he asks "again?" with a cute smile and if you nod he'll just kiss you over and over again. very simple way of cheering you up, and very foolproof tbh.

yaku morisuke; i think throughout the day, he might pester you a little bit about telling him what was wrong, but after you keep insisting you're fine, he relents, and decides that maybe giving you your own time and space to open up to him is better. he tries not to act differently in that sense, but he finds himself being a little more soft spoken, and gentler with you. i just had this image flash in my brain of you resting your head on a desk, head turned to the right, and then yaku comes and sits to your right, putting his head on the desk and facing you. and just. "hi :)" your heart melts. he kisses your forehead softly and tells you you're wonderful, in case you've forgotten. if, or when, you do open up to him, he'll be very eager to listen, and ready to fight off whoever upset you.

yamamoto taketora; this man is angry. like properly. "who the FUCK put a frown on my baby's face. speak the fuck up. i won't hurt you. ill just mutilate you." if you tell him that it's no one, and that you're just upset, he'll be so confused but he'll just nod and be like "okay. okay. do you want a hug?" and he'll hug you so tight. he'll admit that he doesn't like seeing you like this, and that he'll do anything to make it better. at first he's very cautious, but then he just lightbulb moment and as soon as you get home he'll be like "karaoke night babyyyyy" and then. no more sad.

aoba johsai ━━

oikawa tōru; very. perceptive. he greets you normally, even if he notices something's off, because he won't want to worsen anything. you meet him right before he has practice after school, and he'll just cup your face, lifting them to brush at your hair, and you just sigh. "my baby's had a long day, yeah?" he'll be very gentle and careful with you, i'm sure. he gives you a kiss, smiling softly into it, and reassuring you that you're much too strong to let a single bad day destroy you like this. he meets you later that night with a lotta ice cream and you two just binge watch any reality show you could find, shit talking the actors together. he himself is terrible at talking about his feelings this dumbass >:( so he understands if you don't want to yk? will encourage u to vent it out though. expect terrible, makes no sense advice

iwaizumi hajime; he kinda like. gets mad? when you continue to be upset and not speak about it? he's not mad at you! he's just. mad. this is iwa okay. anyways. he won't bring it up mostly, only being slightly more affectionate, especially in his hand holding, which is super gentle already as it is. when he invites you over, that's when he actually starts to talk to you about it. he lets you know that there's nothing worse than seeing you like this and not knowing what to do, and that he wants you to be able to talk to him. about anything. even if you think it's stupid. he'll listen, and tell you that it's not stupid if it's making you upset. he cooks for you <33333 then bakes with you <33333 you feel a lot lighter at the end of the night tbh

hanamaki takahiro; (he's so annoying i love him). as soon as he sees you upset he makes it his mission throughout the day to cheer you up in any possible way. spams your phone while you're class with ten thousand wholesome memes. sends you pick up lines. when he meets you in between classes he just yells out "how's my favorite person in the entire world!" and kisses you so wholly in the middle of the school hallway lmfao. while he's walking you home, takes a longer route and purposely, he passes by your favorite store/bakery/ice cream parlor. buys u ur favorite, and pretends to be shocked when you give him a piece. late at night, he'll facetime you, wondering how you're feeling, asking if you needed to talk about it. whether you do or you don't, you two will fall asleep facetiming.

matsukawa issei; the minute he sees you he's like "whats wrong". no hi or anything. he has like this frown on his face, which seems off bc it's rare to see a frown on issei's face, and he just tucks your chin in his palm gently and stares at your pout. "you good, baby?" he can tell you're not, but he wants you to be able to tell him on your own. sticks by your side the entire day, and nobody really mentions it. he talks to you as if it were a normal day, but his voice has a softer edge. he's not distracting you, per se. he's more, talking to fill the space while giving you your own space to think. once you're alone, he'll just drag you to the nearest comfy surface, flop down, and pull you on top of him. if you even try to resist or ask whats going on he'll just "nap and cuddles first." and when u sleep a lil bit of ur sadness away, he'll just let you talk it out as he continues to hold you <333

fukurodani ━━

bokuto kōtarō; just as empathetic as asahi, if not more. he really does feel it all with you. yk sympathy pains that partners get when women get contractions? bokuto is that partner. with bokuto, i feel like he'd never make you feel like you couldn't just straight up text him "im sad" and feel bad about it. if you ever do that, he'll immediately call, not even bothering with a text. if he can't come over, he stays with you until you've cried your heart out and then laughing until you can't breathe. if he can go over, he smothers you with love. repeatedly says "you know i love you, yeah? you know how grateful i am for you?" and in between kisses "im so lucky. so, so lucky."

akaashi keiji; i feel like as soon as akaashi notices you're down, or you're slightly off, he just grabs your hand and squeezes, forcing you to stop spacing out and focus on him for a second. if you're with a lot of people around you, he'll lean close to you and ask if you wanna go home. he'll be so soft and gentle and understanding, making up some excuse on the spot on why the two of you have to leave. if you're alone, he'll grab your hand and kind of tug you towards him, silently asking you to come into his arms, where you yourself know you feel safest. as soon as you're in the comfort of your home together, he'll like run you a bath and slip into it with you, just holding you until the water grows cold and the droplets on your skin are from your own tears. he'll wait it out, just holding you as reassurance, then make sure nothing's stopping you from spilling everything to him.

konoha akinori; when he first notices, he kinda deflates. like. who would wanna see their s/o like that? his smile is gentler when he greets you, and he's so soft with you. he grabs a pen and lifts your palm up, quickly scribbling down in his unique handwriting "i love you :) <3" on your skin, whispering for you not to wash it off until the end of the day. it is weirdly motivating tbh. as soon as the two of you are alone, he says it to you, face to face, an expected look on his face as if to ask "you know that, yeah?". puts on a movie to tune out the rest of the world, and holds you close to him as it drags on. he'll give advice if you're asking for it, but he's a better listener than anything else.

shiratorizawa ━━

ushijima wakatoshi; does not notice. in all honesty, he expects you to approach him whenever you have an issue or if you're upset. he's kinda like ? so confused when you're so down and really unresponsive, until he starts to notice how touchy you are. like you're leaning more into his touch, holding onto his hand like it's your lifeline, stealing his vbc jacket because it smells like him. is very straightforward, and will just ask you if you're okay as he walks/drives you home. kinda just stops in front of your house and presses a kiss to your forehead, then pulling you into a hug. "please don't be upset." he won't tell you that it kills him, but you can sense the unsaid words. he urges you to keep his jacket when he notices how safe it makes you feel. greets you the next morning with a new cactus in a pot hehe.

semi eita; is very cuddly once he notices. you'll sit at a table in school and he'll be sitting next to you, but he just pulls you into him and lets you rest your head on his chest, mumbling softly into your hair "i know you're sad and it's okay." he doesn't say anything else, just holds you there with a few kisses in between until he has to let go. late at night, if your thoughts are still keeping you up, he'll be up too, worrying, and will text you at 3 am if u wanna sneak out to meet him. takes you to the park and lays on the grass with you, picking out stars and constellations in the sky, with a soft soundtrack playing from his phone next to the two of you. he makes you feel secure enough to be sad even if you have all the blessings in the world, and makes sure you know that he'll always be there for you, even at 3 in the morning.

satori tendō; cheers you up by making you forget literally everything. replaces the sadness in your brain with just pure serotonin in any way he can think of. he'll take you to an amusement park, get ice cream with you, take you to the carnival in town, to the park, to the beach, to the pool, take you up to his house's rooftop. literally anything. and then he'll say something like "life's too short to spend it being sad over anything, darling." he's so understanding, and if you're frustrated or something he'll tell you to let it out by like wrestling him or some shit. exhausts you so much and you're filled to the brim with dopamine. he makes sure you're always happy, never seeing a dull moment in your relationship with him.

goshiki tsutomu; freaks out. plain and simple lmfao. but once he like grounds himself, he just softly comes up to you and asks you if you wanna talk about it, or if there's anything he can do. if yes, he'll break his leg running to go do it. if no, he'll just sit with you in silence, leaning over to hold your hand, talking to you about volleyball and his aspirations and how well he's improving. he's better at distracting you than helping you face your issues, mainly because he stresses out about giving the wrong advice or somehow making you sadder. he'll take a lot of pictures of you together on snapchat random filters to try and cheer you up, then later on in the night he'll send them to you and be like "look how cute we are ugh what a power couple" i love this dorkhabsjsks

shirabu kenjirō; i think he definitely notices, but keeps it to himself. he’d maybe think he’s imagining things and that you’re okay, so he’d go about his day normally. he doesn’t see you after school, and that’s when he puts two and two together and realizes yeah maybe you are sad. so he texts you, and texts you, and texts you, and gets no reply, so he just. comes over. unannounced. uninvited. just straight vibes. he’s already ordered your favorite take out, and already settling in bed with you under the cover with the lights dimmed and some chick flick playing in the background. gives the b e s t advice because he’s so blunt. like he will tell you if you’re overreacting, but you’re still his s/o, so he’d like wince as he says it. that’s all the sympathy you’re getting <3 but his bluntness will shock you into laughing hehe

inarizaki ━━

miya atsumu; usually, with atsumu, you’re always experiencing loud days. your relationship is all fun and flirty and suave and cool. but when he notices you’re sad, he goes quiet. like. eerily so. immediately pulls you aside somewhere private if you’re at a public place like school or something, and with his hands in yours he asks you if you’re okay. yk that thing where ur on the verge of tears and someone asks you if you’re okay and you just burst. yeah <3. his heart absolutely breaks and he just pulls you into a hug, resting your head on his chest and wrapping his arms around your neck. he just holds you there, even if you’re missing class/your friends are worried. he’ll stay with you until your tears have dried up, until you yourself let go.

miya osamu; i don’t see osamu as someone that loves pda. i feel like he’d be a more lowkey kinda guy. but if you’re sad, that gets thrown out the window. he doesn’t really in the moment, and won’t think too much when he pulls you close to his side and just wraps an arm around your waist/shoulder. yeah he’ll get looks but he can feel you trembling and shaking from holding back tears so yk, priorities. he’ll definitely stress eat with you. takes you literally anywhere and feeds you as you rant to him with tears streaming down your face and he’s just nodding sympathetically as he stuffs your mouth one bite after the other. romance is beautiful

suna rinatarō; when he notices you’re sad, his first response is alright what the fuck who messed up. he immediately blames someone else, and if he’s right, he’ll only get really agitated. just giving everyone the side eye from where you can’t see as he walks the two of you, your hand in his tight. if it’s not someone specific, he’ll just hum thoughtfully and then nod, before pulling you away somewhere private and just sitting you down and saying “talk.” very, very good listener. i can’t stress this enough. as you’re speaking he’s already thinking of a million different ways to help you solve your problem. walks with you as he traces your hands and just quietly tells you all the solutions.

aran ojiro; oh my god as a boyfriend he ticks all the boxes. he’s great at communicating, always satisfies your needs, is trustworthy and trusts you. the list goes on. immediately knows when you’re off/sad, and just smiles softly as he takes your hand, kissing your knuckles and saying, “let’s go home, yeah?” at home, he makes you some calming tea, probably pulls out some cookies or brownies or biscuits (that HE made but we’re not gonna get into that) and just listens as you talk, whether it’s about why you’re sad or just in general. gives you honest advice, but also a lil biased bc he loves you hehe <3

[cassyapper]

jotaro kujo song analysis: “eight” by sleeping at last

i could not figure out what the fuck to title this for a long time. please forgive me ik it’s awkward but it’s the best i got

anyway the song “eight” by sleeping at last made me mentally ill so let’s get into why <3

here’s a link to the song: https://youtu.be/obi4KCh6eHQ

here’s a link to the lyrics i referenced: https://genius.com/Sleeping-at-last-eight-lyrics

be warned there are part 3, part 4, part 5, and part 6 spoilers in this

with that let’s begin.

“I remember the minute;/it was like a switch was flipped --/i was just a kid who grew up strong enough/to pick this armor up,/and suddenly it fit” Lengthy first line to start this on i know but cutting it up didn’t make sense so please forgive me… Alright let’s get to the meat of this hm? This line is about when jotaro first manifested star platinum. “I remember the minute, it was like a switch was flipped” fits perfectly with how suddenly and obviously star platinum became known to its user, as jotaro first manifests it when he’s in the middle of a fight, a fight star platinum ends very quickly and brutally. The “i was just a kid who grew up strong enough to pick this armor up” is about jotaro having the willpower to control a stand such as star platinum and not get ill over it. He “grew up strong enough to pick this armor up”, this armor being star platinum (which, yes, star platinum is armor more than a weapon because its strength is used to protect. This is stated explicitly in the jin hashimoto song “star platinum” which was written specifically with jotaro/star platinum in mind, as the title suggests). It also shows how young jotaro was re the “kid” description; he was only 17, the youngest jojo up to that point. the “and suddenly it fit” also mixes with how suddenly star platinum manifested, particularly how jotaro gained passable control over it very quickly

“God, that was so long ago, long ago, long ago…/I was little, I was weak, I was perfectly naive,/and I grew up too quick.” Another long line im sorry it just doesnt make sense to cut it up 😭 Anyway this is part 6 jotaro reflecting on his past self, PARTICULARLY part 3 jotaro, which explains the “god, that was so long ago, long ago, long ago…” segment “I was little, i was weak, i was perfectly naive” is kinda gold coming from part 6 jotaro cause end of part 3 jotaro is canonically when he’s at his strongest but i dont think part 6 jotaro is talking about star platinum in this line. He’s talking about jotaro being tactless and rude and pushing away his loved aways in a disillusioned attempt to keep them safe. By part 6, jotaro has to have known his coping mechanism of self-imposed isolation wasnt fair to his loved ones/himself and it clearly didnt WORK as evidenced by jolyne’s situation, so he’s cursing his younger self for it here. Hence, the calling of part 3 jotaro “little, weak, perfectly naive.” part 3 jotaro starts making the bed that part 6 jotaro ends up having to lay in and he hates him for it. The “and I grew up too quick” part is jotaro acknowledging his trauma. Even before part 3 started jotaro clearly had issues and they just kept building and building and building from part 3 and on. Combined with his self-imposed isolation, jotaro had to grow up quick to survive, and this line is part 6 jotaro reflecting on that

“Now you won’t see all that i have to lose,/all i’ve lost in the fight to protect it.” Remember the self-imposed isolation i mentioned in the last line? This line is about why jotaro does that. He hates being vulnerable. He hates relying on others. We only see him comfortable trusting others to take care of things ONCE the entire series, during the steely dan arc, when he believes in kakyoin’s abilities to keep joseph safe and get the lovers out of him safely. ONCE out of the four parts he’s featured in, out of the three he’s prominent in. jotaro does this, as i previously mentioned, out of a disillusioned attempt to keep those he loves safe, hence the “now you won’t see all that i have to lose” line. This behavior is solidified in jotaro at the end of stardust crusaders, when the two final times he tried to trust that others would handle it resulted in the deaths of over of half those he cared the most about (he may have gotten joseph back, but don’t forget that joseph did actually die). Thus, this decisive night ties into the “all i’ve lost in the fight to protect it” line. He’s lost loved ones but he won’t lose them again, not in the same way at least. Ironically, the self-imposed isolation only puts his loved ones and himself in danger, but i can get into that later.

“I won’t let you in, i swore never again --/i can’t afford, no, i refuse to be rejected” This line kinda ties back with what i was mentioning in the last line, but it hones it a bit more on jotaro’s complete denial of being vulnerable rather than how he acts to ensure he isnt such. “I wont let you in, i swore never again” is a direct tie-in for how jotaro feels after stardust crusaders; he is never going to get as close to anyone or anything the way he was close to the crusaders ever again. Nothing is ever going to matter to him the same way and he is going to make sure of that, as the “swore never again” implies, because he is certain, at least at first, that this will keep others safe. The “i can’t afford, no, i refuse to be rejected” part goes into how selfish and arrogant jotaro’s mentality is. Don’t get me wrong, jotaro’s self-imposed isolation can be seen as selfless, especially because the main driving force behind it is to keep others safe -- but it’s not the only force driving it. Like i said, jotaro doesn’t want to be vulnerable, and to be sure he doesnt feel that way, he needs to ensure he won’t be hurt. Can’t be sad when people die if you were never close to them, right? So as much as it is to protect others, he also is protecting himself by closing off from others. It’s also arrogant of jotaro to assume he is the deciding factor of who lives and dies, that he gets to choose/manipulate the cycle of life and death by deciding on if he opens up to others. Jotaro had this mentality of being a “deciding factor” shoved into his head during the journey to egypt, and that kinda warps his worldview as a result; everything must be his fault. Things go bad surely because he let them somehow. And it’s not jotaro’s fault he’s ill in the head like this but it is still arrogant, and the “i can’t afford, no, i refuse to be rejected” line attests to this.

“I want to break these bones until theyre better/i want to break them right and feel alive” Oh jotaro you have the shittiest fuckign coping mechanisms Alright. “I want to break these bones until theyre better” ties into jotaro throwing himself into dangerous situations alone. He’s just so so damn convinced he can handle everything himself -- bc again, he is led to believe he is the deciding factor of life and death -- he just has to try. If things go wrong, it’s bc he didn’t try hard enough, hence the “break these bones until theyre better”; jotaro will hurt himself and will be convinced he deserved it until he “learns” how to be perfect like he’s “supposed” to be. But being perfect isnt something you can learn, you mentally ill motherfucker jotaro. anyway “I want to break them right and feel alive” ties into the fact jotaro would rather break his body over and over and over rather than tell his loved ones he cares. The only right way to be hurt to him is taking a hit that was meant for those he loves. Jotaro is very much a man of action rather than a man of word, and this line is about his rather unique way of acting (that is, getting beat the fuck up over and over) Basically jotaro can’t tell the people he loves that he, well, loves them, unless he is literally dying. Examples of what i mean: jotaro preferred going on a perilous, 50-day journey to just telling holly he loved her; jotaro preferred getting beat over the head with a rock in the lovers arc rather than risk hurting joseph; jotaro preferred to literally get blown up by sheer heart attack rather than tell koichi to his face he is a good kid; jotaro stepped knowingly into a trap for jolyne and had to literally believe he was in fact saying his last words before he uttered “i’ve always cherished you.”

“You were wrong, you were wrong, you were wrong --/my healing needed more than time” Oh my GODDDddDDDdcdd im sobbing as i type jotaro your head is so so damn ill Okay so i see him spitting this line towards joseph. Let me explain Joseph would no doubt pick up on jotaro’s ptsd and he’ll do his best to console jotaro over the deaths of their friends. But see joseph is ALSO an ill in the head idiot whose idea of therapy is electroshock and who calls ptsd “shell shock”. So all he can offer to jotaro is “youll feel better in time” because that was kinda true for him; he managed to move on in time. What joseph fails to realize is what made him feel better was not time, but the support of those remaining in his life (lisa lisa, suziq, erina, smokey). But jotaro listens and tries to give it time but the thing with jotaro is he just gets worse and worse as time wears on because he deliberately cut himself off from anyone who could console him (as well as got continually traumatized throughout his life), so time never helped but actually made things worse. Thus jotaro spitting “you were wrong, you were wrong, you were wrong, my healing needed more than time”. In terms of timeline, probably happens right after part 5 jotaro stares longingly at the crusaders picture

“When i see fragile things, helpless things, broken things/i see the familiar” Im sorry every new line i start to analyze i begin crying so im just letting you all know incase the coherency takes a dip (as if this was coherent in the first place lmfao) Anyway so this line in relation to Jotaro is about how he projects HARD on the new generation. We see this w his interactions w josuke and koichi, the “fragile things” (there is no way he didnt see koichi as a filler for kakyoin im sorry. Also he just wants josuke safe with his friends like how he wished he was safe with his own friends as a teenager), how he was wary of giorno, “the helpless things” (jotaro is scared he’ll be similar to his dad, just like jotaro is similar enough to dio to share the same stand power…), and his interactions w jolyne, “the broken things” (angry teen in a prison? Come now). 

“I was little, i was weak, i was perfect too/now i’m a broken mirror” Throwback to the second line. Once again part 6 jotaro is reflecting but the difference here is that part 3 was when jotaro was last unashamedly happy, but more than that, part 3 jotaro was on his way to healing before everything went to shit. like i mentioned earlier, jotaro only relies on someone else completely once, and that happens in part 3. Jotaro is finally able to trust in someone else’s capabilities, which is what he needed to do before he could allow anyone to help him with the weight of the world on his shoulders. Hence, why part 6 jotaro would describe him as “perfect”; because he would’ve been perfect enough if he could just trust in others like that again But as the line suggests, that went wrong. Jotaro is now a “broken mirror,” which alludes to the fact that while he projects onto the kids, the kids (the ones that know him at least) project onto him as well, especially jolyne, because in part 6 she finally figures out her dad’s thought processes, as she is experiencing those patterns of thinking too. Jotaro is a role model for them in the sense of “see him? Do the opposite of what he did” KJ;DNJ;DN;SN

“But i can’t let you see all that i have to lose/all that i’ve lost in the fight to protect it” Same meaning as before mostly but the repetition is important me thinks because it mimics jotaro like frantically trying to remind himself why he must be distant when all he wanted to do was go home to jolyne and be her father

“I can’t let you in --/ i swore never again,/ i can’t afford to let myself be blindsided” This means roughly the same thing as the previous line that’s similar to this, but the “i can’t afford to let myself be blindsided” is less about jotaro’s selfishness/arrogance and more about how he believes enemies will use his loved ones against him and how goddamn, it would work, it would work so well because jotaro loves so, so damn much It’s a shame distancing himself didn’t work the way he wanted it to and ended up making his loved ones even more vulnerable than they would have been otherwise

“I’m standing guard,/i’m falling apart/and all i want to do is to trust you” (Begins screaming and doesn’t stop) okay so this line is about jotaro and jolyne during the beginning of stone ocean “Im standing guard” alludes to the fact that jotaro is still desperately trying to appear distant and uninterested even as he attempts to break his fucking daughter out of prison “I’m falling apart” ties into jotaro failing miserably at remaining cold towards jolyne, how he eventually caves in and tells her he loves her in addition to taking a literal bullet for her, using time stop to ensure he can make it to her to do so. and also this line ties into how he is literally physically shot and how his memories and stand are taken from him “And all i want to do is to trust you” is directed towards jolyne of course. God his whole “i’ve always cherished you” ties in with this line; like i mentioned earlier, jotaro by part 6 knows his self-imposed isolation is useless, but old habits die hard and also he was in very deep by the time he accepted there was no reason to go in the first place at all. So he doesn’t know how to change, he doesn’t know how to trust jolyne, it’d been 20ish years since he last trusted someone completely, but god he wants to. He wants to trust her. It’s all he wants to do hence this line

“Show me how to lay my sword down/for long enough to let you through” So continuing from the last line, jotaro just wants to let jolyne in. he wants to learn how to do that. I think this line is actually directed towards his younger self; 17 year old jotaro managed to let in a person once, after all (more than one person in fact, but all the crusaders). This would also make more sense w my interpretation of how part 6 jotaro calls part 3 jotaro “perfect” in this regard Essentially it’s jotaro thumbing through his memories to figure out how his past self gathered the security to trust in someone else wholeheartedly...which makes the fact that pucci steals his memories particularly fucked up in this context

“Here i am, pry me open/what do you want to know?” Another line directed toward jolyne. “Here i am, pry me open” refers to how after jotaro tells jolyne he cherishes her, all cards are on the table. He’s shown vulnerability, might as well go full throttle. So, he’s willing to talk to jolyne for the first time ever, especially because she’s a stand user now “What do you want to know?” ties into jotaro being willing to open up, but also the fact that jolyne doesnt really know her dad ):

“I’m just a kid who grew up scared enough/to hold the door shut/and bury my innocence” Hhnghg begins wailing this line is again about post-egypt jotaro. A lot of jotaro’s like...emotional maturation (and even some physical) occurred during the trip to egypt and immediately afterward. he’s in pain and desperately trying to rationalize a way he can be in control of never letting something like what happened in egypt happen again, hence the “im just a kid who grew up scared enough” “To hold the door shut” refers to how jotaro cut off other people, even the people who used to know him very well, like joseph and polnareff and holly “And bury my innocence” i mentioned this in another line but this bit also refers to how jotaro had to grow up quickly to survive, considering his self-imposed isolation and his life path of chasing down dio’s remnants

“But here’s a map, here’s a shovel/here’s my Achilles’ heel” This line is SUPPOSED to be directed toward jolyne but inadvertently it is also directed toward pucci. When jotaro says fuck it and gives up on his pretense of disinterest in jolyne, finally letting her know he loves her, he’s finally building the frame of a bridge to jolyne; he’s ready to do what he’s wanted to for so long, no matter how vulnerable it makes him, and that is to be jolyne’s father. However, pucci takes note of this; he knows to aim for jolyne in the final battle because of jotaro’s earlier actions when he tries breaking jolyne out of prison. It really is a shame how the narrative keeps fucking enforcing jotaro’s shitty self-imposed isolation

“I’m all in, palms out, i’m at your mercy now and i’m ready to begin/i am strong, i am strong, i am strong enough to let you in” Hmm i imagine this line being when jotaro meets back up with jolyne after he gets his memory disk back. The first thing he does is hug her and cradle her close to him, showing off to the world, right in front of pucci, how much his daughter means to him. But jotaro, at least for the moment, is not scared to be vulnerable anymore. Ever since he decided to give up his cold facade, he was ready to let jolyne in, and he finally has the chance to do that at least a little right before the final battle, which is what this line is about

“I’ll shake the ground with all my might/i will pull my whole heart up to the surface” Final battle in stone ocean,,, What the “i’ll shake the ground will all my might” line refers to is jotaro’s willingness to use star platinum the world during the battle. He’s ready to go all in to save the world, and most importantly, save jolyne, even if he has to use the source of his greatest trauma to do it. Jotaro’s a key player and he knows it, has known it for a long time, and this time he’s going to use that for his happy ending. And well, as i mentioned in the last line, jotaro’s done with the self-isolation and throws himself into the role of jolyne’s father, at least as much as he has the right to throw himself into. This is mostly what the “i will pull my whole heart up to the surface” line refers to

“For the innocent, for the vulnerable/i’ll show up to the frontlines with a purpose” More stone ocean final battle. The “innocent and vulnerable” jotaro is showing up for are jolyne, namely, but also hermes and emporio, and beyond that, the world. Jotaro understands how serious this is and he’s always been a force meant for protection, so he is here to do just that, which is what the “i’ll show up to the frontlines with a purpose” line refers to. Jotaro doesnt believe he’s a good person -- and he might not be, in the grand scheme of things -- but he does fight for what he believes is right, he always has, he mentions this way back in stardust crusaders during his fight with kakyoin. He’s never going to let injustice stand, especially not when he knows he’s such a key player

“And i’ll give all i have, i’ll give my blood, give my sweat --/an ocean of tears will spill for what is broken” This line actually applies to all the “final battles” jotaro has been involved in; part 3, part 4, and part 6. Jotaro, as i mentioned in the last line, has a strong sense of justice and is a force that first and foremost tries to protect, which the “i’ll give all i have, i’’l give my blood, give my sweat” part of this line refers to. Jotaro gives his all, has given his all, to rid the world of dio’s influence, he ruined his entire fucking life to do so, and this line gives credence to that. “An ocean of tears will spill for what is broken” refers to jotaro mourning all the what-ifs in his life, which are all tied with how the outcomes of these final battles go. If part 3 didnt end the way it did, jotaro would know how to trust still, he wouldve been happy even, maybe he wouldnt have had to sacrifice the rest of his life to dio; if part 4 didn’t end the way it did, maybe jotaro couldve gone home to his daughter, maybe he couldve been a bit of a better dad (this is because kids were involved in part 4 even if they didn’t try to because stand users attract stand users, and jotaro couldnt risk doing that to his daughter, so he ends up never coming home); and now for part 6, jotaro hopes that if it ends just a little better than the previous two, jotaro could at least died a satisfying death of sacrificing himself for jolyne, or maybe even got a chance to try mending his relationship with jolyne if they both survive

“I’m shattered porcelain, glued back together again” So this line speaks to both physical and emotional states Jotaro was physically “shattered porcelain” when he lost his stand and memory and also was shot, and he was “glued back together again” when he got medical attention and jolyne got back his disks Jotaro was emotionally “shattered porcelain” due to the fact he couldnt trust anyone completely since he was 17 goddamn years old but he’s “glued back together again” in the sense he’s ready to finally, finally try and be vulnerable in order to save his relationship with jolyne

“Invincible like i’ve never been” This line hurts so fucking much because i believe jotaro was optimistic, all things considered, at the beginning of the final fight in stone ocean. After all, he knows he’s an important figure in all this, he has his stand disk and memories back, he and jolyne and the others have a plan, and he has a future he wants to fight for in addition to the world’s continued functioning So he feels “invincible” like he’s never felt before because not even during the part 3 final battle with dio did he have the hope for the future he has now. But then. Then pucci brings out the knives. And the man who could control time never had enough in the end. He dies and cant even save jolyne with his death. The world ends. He failed. I think this is perfectly represented with how suddenly the song ends. It just perfectly encapsulates the tragedy that is jotaro kujo and i cant stop fucking thinking about it

thanks for reading all this if you did. jotaro kujo makes me feel mentally ill

[dreamhimcloser]

hey i would like to request a ploy!bts imagine w Y/N, ik its probably a bit weird but im forever getting bias wrecked so it'd be easier if i can read an imagine with all of them in. I dont have any ideas for a plot, and to be honest i dont really mind as I just really love your writing!! I understand if its too much to fit in as there'd be like 8 characters and whatever but i thought i might as well ask :) x (oh and can Y/N be 22, a couple of months younger than jimin and tae as well?) thankss ♥

Thank you so much for your support, I hope you’ll like this!♥

Word count: 3,170 wordsSummary: Four times where TaeKook interrupted other member’s “alone time” with you, and one time it was touching.Genre: Fluff, Poly!BTS as OT!7

“I’m in practice room 6!” Hoseok half-screamed from the other end of the line. His voice gets that loud only when he’s really excited, the mare concept making you giggle to yourself. BTS’s tour has been long and hard on your boys, so you knew they need the break. Hoseok still insisted on bringing you back to the practice room and teaching you a few moves of their newest comeback. He thought you’d enjoy it and has been telling you so for a long time, mostly in text form with way too many emojis.

Now that they’re on a break, you could finally break your old, tired body on that routine of theirs. Well, it wouldn’t really break as you were barely two months younger than Taehyung and young enough to still enjoy life. If only your joints would have agreed to that.

You walked through the row of practice room straight to the door with the big, black six on it, already hearing music from the inside. It wasn’t their music, so Hoseok must have started warming up before you came. You pushed the door to see just that – Hoseok stretching his body this way and that without an actual plan, just the free movement of limbs in that graceful way that’s just so him.

His eyes lit up when he noticed your figure in the mirror, a smile quickly catching up with his excitement as he almost threw himself your way. “I knew those pants would look great on you! So glad I got them for you, babe.”

“They’re super comfy,” you giggled against the rain of kisses Hoseok was inflicting on your lips, lifting you a few centimeters off of the ground. “Thank you.”

“Anything for you,” Hoseok set you down in front of the mirror, taking his position next to you. “You want to drink something before we start?”

“Nope,” You jumped a little from one foot to another, giving him a fakely-determined face that made him laugh. “Let’s do this.”

The moves were more complicated than you thought, and you were drenched in sweat by the time you noticed a movement in the corner of your eye. Jungkook slipped through the door, the playful expression already plastered on his face. He made his way behind Hoseok, who didn’t notice the intrusion. He stood there for a second, watching Hoseok’s movements before he dove right into the familiar rhythm of them, but in an exaggerated way that used up all your oxygen. You couldn’t stop laughing, your lungs screaming for oxygen you couldn’t give them as you dropped down to the ground.

Hoseok paused when you stopped moving next to him, looking behind him and a second later he was right next to you on the floor.

Jungkook thrived on the attention, dancing even harder to please both you and Hoseok. Hoseok crawled on the floor, holding his stomach as leaned his forehead on your shoulder, hitting you thigh lightly. You threw your head against his shoulder, soon feeling Jungkook pressing into you from the front to join in on the laughter.

It wasn’t the lesson you thought you’d get, but your boys were close and that’s what mattered.

Namjoon studied the Ikea book, reading over instructions. You were watching him from your sitting place on his thighs, hands on his shoulders and eyebrow raised. “You want to build a table?”

“Why do you sound so skeptical?”

You glanced sideways at the “God of Destruction” cup you got him for his birthday. “No reason.”

Your eyes met his when you looked back at him, the narrowed look he was giving you echoed how done he was with you. You wanted to tell him he could do it, but both of you knew he’s more likely to break the table than to build it for use. “Will you help me?”

The answer was clear, you chuckled as you lifted yourself from his lap to look at the box hiding behind his current, warren down table. You pulled it out, using the scissors Namjoon kept in his right drawer to bust the box open. Inside you were greeted with screws, wood pieces and metal attachments.

“I want to build it, you’re here for backup.”

You backed up, lifting your hands in front of you, “Well, we got a badass on our hands.”

Namjoon rolled his eyes, no amount of done being able to stop the laughter from bubbling up inside of him. “I meant I want to see that I can do this! I already know you can.” You sat on the chair he vacated, rolling it closer to him with your feet pushing against the floor. “Besides, I don’t need another meme lord. Kook is already in on it and he’s starting to drag Yoongi into it.”

You watched as Namjoon pulled pieces out of the box, laying them in front of him to look back at the instructions. “Seeing Yoongi being one of the cool kids is pretty funny, though.”

“You are one of the cool kids,” Namjoon deadpanned, holding the two pieces up to piece them together. “This is right?”

“Yes and yes, I am one of the young ones,” You chuckled, leaning back in the chair watching Namjoon frown his eyebrows. The angle in which he tried to connect the pieces was all wrong, you pondered if you should tell him that or let him figure his own way out.

“Y/N!” Taehyung ran into the room, grabbing the arms of the chair and turning you towards him. You heard a sigh from your left and almost laughed at how Namjoon reacted to one of the maknaes stealing your attention once again. They were pretty good at it. “I can’t believe Midoria broke his arm!”

“Doesn’t he always,” You laughed, glancing at Namjoon every few seconds to make sure he’s got a handle on things.

You missed the wood slicing his palm by a second.

You didn’t miss the pained cry, the sound making Taehyung’s flow of blabber about Boku No Hero Academia pause as you both stared at him. Namjoon got to his feet with his good hand cupping his injured one. “I’m good, don’t worry,” his smile showed that he meant it, a little embarrassed but not too bad. “I’ll go wash this for a second.”

You told Seokjin, who cornered Namjoon in the bathroom to treat his hand while you and Taehyung build that table, ignoring the small blood stain that graced the underside of the table.

“It’s an easy recipe, I promise,” Seokjin held onto your hand as he guided you in the direction of the kitchen. His legs bumped into so many furniture that you figured you’ll have a lot of blue marks to kiss tonight. “You can do it, and I’ll be right by your side.”

“That’s brave coming from a man who jumps back when the fire is turned on,” You teased, laughing as he made a sharp noise from the collision his knee made with the bookcase. He should really look where he’s going.

He actually stopped this time, maybe this whole-wood furniture was the one to crack his bone. His face was pulled into a grimace as he rubbed his injured limb, “I think your prince-like boyfriend, the most handsome out of all of your boyfriends, deserves better treatment than this.”

“Of course you do,” You cooed, cupping his face and pecking his forehead. “Come on, let’s get cooking.”

Seokjin smiled so wide you knew he doesn’t need to be told twice. He hurried over to the spread ingredients, way too many for you to begin pieces together what you’ll be eating later. Seokjin was watching you with a smirk, hands fisted on his hips in a ridiculous superhero pose. “Just let me lead the way to food paradise, Y/N. Do you trust me?”

He reached an open palm towards you and you accepted his hand loosely. “Superman and Aladdin is an awful crossover. But, you know, sure.”

He accepted your half-assed agreement like you just screamed your lungs off. You had a good reason to trust him, though, as his directions came at the right time and you never felt like you were helpless in front of the mass of food. You cut your finger once, but it was at the end of it and pretty shallow. It didn’t stop Seokjin from pausing what he was doing and grabbing a Band-Aid for you. His movements were careful, and he kissed the surface of the Band-Aid when it was fastened correctly around your tiny injury, which made you giggle and kiss him for good measure.

Spending time with them like this just reminded you of how much you missed them this entire time. Seokjin was pretty hard to find alone, as he hated being in that state, so this was pretty rare. It felt good, though.

The time flew by with soft music in the background and Seokjin’s horrible laugh. The domestic-ness of it made you warm.

Another thing that made you warm were arms wrapped around your middle. A kiss was pressed to your skin before a cheek pressed to your shoulder, whoever it is holding you tight. The body behind you was pretty long and Namjoon probably wouldn’t do this, so it had to be Taehyung.

You leaned your head against his, appreciating the interaction without voicing it. Seokjin was in the middle of a story, his back was to you but you felt the need to give his story your full attention, even if you already heard it from Yoongi.

It was funnier when Seokjin told it anyway.

The word on Seokjin’s lips came out stuttered when he did turn around to notice the intrusion on your private time. You looked over the head of hair on your shoulder to smile at Seokjin, showing him you are invested in his story.

“She can’t cook when you hold her, Tae,” Seokjin informed him, moving closer to cut his vegetables next to you. You knew it was an act of spite, and you couldn’t help but giggle. Taehyung’s response was muttering in a high-pitched tone and shaking you around, empowering your giggles.

“I can still do a good job, Seok,” You promised, stretching to lean his direction. He noticed, lowering his knife as he closed the distance and kissed you once, twice. “Trust me.”

Seokjin still pouted at you and Taehyung made an unhappy sound about not receiving attention, but you already knew how to handle it, and them.

When Jimin asked you to come to watch a movie in his room, you knew exactly what the glint in his eyes meant. He loved being intimate with each and every one of you, and you were kind of proud of him that he didn’t drag you off for a fierce one-on-one session the first moment he came through the door.

You figured now was the time as you entered his room to find it completely dark. The TV in his room was set on the movie VOD so he was probably keeping that front for a while, both of you already knowing that you won’t be actually watching a movie and being completely alright with it.

That’s just how movie dates with Jimin went.

He moved aside with a grin, holding the blanket up to allow you to comfortably climb in his bed. You noted that Hoseok’s bed was empty, he must have kicked him out to have this alone time with you. His arm was waiting for you to rest your head on, remote control in the other hand as he flipped through the movies.

“You wanted to watch that new action movie, didn’t you?” He hummed, pecking your cheek.

“You’re asking that like we’re actually going to watch a movie,” You giggled, moving to lie on your side and throwing a leg over Jimin’s. He moved closer on instinct, still looking at the TV.

“Let’s start it, maybe it’s interesting.”

You agreed, choosing to play his game. Maybe he’s in one of those I-stole-your-attention moods that he gets sometimes, feeling like it’s an accomplishment even though that’s what you came to do here to begin with.

You settled in, moving to lie on your back with your head on his shoulder. He pulled you closer by the shoulders, settling in himself.

The movie started kind of slow, you heard from friends who watched that the build-up will be worth it when shit hits the fan. You collected mental clues as to where this is going, your concentration moving from Jimin to the movie as you took in the story unfolding in front of you.

That is, until Jimin moved to lie on his side with his hand on your hip. You fought a smile, straining to appear like you didn’t know this was coming. His hand crept under your shirt, dragging goosebumps along your skin until his fingertips reached your bra. He moved along its line and you couldn’t help but pushing your chest up to press against his touch.

Between the movie’s growing plot and Jimin’s distractions, you barely heard the door opened. You did feel someone joining you on the bed, though, the covers lifting and a warm body pressing against you.

“That movie is supposed to be sick! Move over.”

Jungkook, as Jimin’s boyfriend of two years, already knew what movie nights with him meant. He glanced at his older member, waiting to be told to get the fuck out. Jimin held his gaze and you saw him losing the fight just by looking at him.

“Y/N wanted to watch it too,” he ended up saying, scooting to allow more room for Jungkook.

“Thanks, I’ll just watch it and go to bed, cool?”

“Cool.”

You knew Jimin wasn’t completely cool with it, even if Jungkook’s big eyes made him absolutely useless. You took the opportunity to sneak your hand under Jimin’s shirt and draw lines on his stomach, an action that always seemed to give him comfort. His body relaxing against you told you it worked, and the kisses he kept pressing to your head throughout the movie spoke of his thanks.

The only one of your boyfriends who never claimed your attention to himself, even if he really wanted it, was Yoongi. He’d just hang around, catch you when you’re free and if you weren’t, he’d just join in on someone else’s time. You knew he wanted to build their next album pretty quick too, so he was barely at the dorm and made his studio his second home.

Which meant it was up to you to give him the attention he won’t voice the need to.

You pushed the door on his studio open, instantly greeted with half-dim lights, a scatter of clothes around the floor and a very busy boyfriend. You laid the food you made him on his desk beside him and accepted his short, hummed thanks before you started picking the clothes up. You smelt them to see if they needed to be folded or thrown into the laundry bag, an action you’re used to by now.

“Hey kid,” You glanced back to see Yoongi pushed one of the headphones off of his ear. “I’ll be done with this arrangement and I’m with you, okay?”

“Sure.”

Yoongi moved the headphone back and went right back into clicking around to perfect his music. He was always working so hard and this passion of his took from his health and his time with his loved ones, but you knew that’s just what his soul needed to survive.

So you were happy to take care of his health and his time with his loved ones for him.

When the floor was finally clean from straying garments you set down on the opened couch in the back of the studio room. He must have slept here, you figured as you failed to see him last night and this morning, and the bed being open. He didn’t even have a pillow or a blanket, you really wished you would have known yesterday and dropped off something that he can use.

There were over twenty texts waiting for you on your phone, most of them being blabber in the group chat. They were excited about something, probably that drama they started watching together on the airplane.

Yoongi made a prolonged choked sound as he stretched on his chair, hands up high and the headphones around his neck. “I think I’ll just let my ears rest. I’ll go take a shower and we can nap or something, okay?”

You nodded, catching his phone as he threw it your way. The group chat was still going crazy, Yoongi’s phone buzzing constantly next to you as you held your own in your hand.

The door opened maybe a minute or two after Yoongi left, your curious gaze lifting to it wondering if he forgot anything. Taehyung was the one to poke his head through the door, though, and he smiled at you instantly.

“I figured you’ll think the same as me,” he chuckled as he made his way to you, throwing himself down beside you and wiggling until his head was on your thigh. “He spent the night alone yesterday, I didn’t want him to be alone tonight too.”

“You’re the best boyfriend ever,” You booped his nose, moving to card your fingers through his hair.

“And you’re the best girlfriend ever,” Taehyung buried his face between your thigh and the bed, hiding the blush that came from being praised. You knew he was always looking out for Yoongi, a part of you wondering if it’s because they were the least matching. Or that’s what they’ve been told. You knew the two of them mashed together perfectly when they weren’t pressured into it.

Taehyung drifted off to sleep against you, you heard enough noise coming from his and Namjoon’s room last night to know that he hasn’t slept much. You kept playing with his hair, watching Hoseok, Jimin and Jungkook joking around in the chat room like they’re not sitting next to each other in the dorm’s living room.

They always liked to have everyone be a part of what they enjoy.

“When did he get here?” Yoongi questioned, drying his hair out with a small towel.

“Like a minute after you left, he didn’t want you to be alone.” Yoongi chuckled, moving closer to join your fingers in Taehyung’s hair.

“You guys are always looking out for me.”

“Isn’t that was boyfriends and girlfriends are for?” You leaned your head back to make it easier for Yoongi to claim your lips. “Does it bother you we’re not alone?”

You had to ask because unlike the rest, Yoongi could mind and say nothing, give no looks, show no sign that he missed how he wanted things to turn out.

“No,” Yoongi smiled at how well you know him by now. “I love being with as many of you as I can.”

[textsacc]

mm 🥺 nvm bestie i cant sleeb i have a lot to say n think abt

like how when i put my head down on a pillow n close my eyes i can rly see mc and its bad idw to 🥺 n also now im feeling regret for playing mc im so upset bc i cant seem to feel good abt being able to play games

mmm n also i felt bad trying to sleeb bc i missed u n miss sleebbing w u but was playing mc and i prefer u to minecraft and its just !!!! bad that i had to focus on minecrafr

like i didnt even get to ask u abt ur day or anth i ddint get to tell u that u did a great job w the party i didnr get to ask how u celebrated. u know what i also realize while laying down. i didnt even get to ask u out this summer n im so frustrated bc sch is starting for u n idw interrupt your schedule but i wanna do stuff now that im finally not busy and its just!!! its just a whole mess!!! i dont like it,,, i just wanna spend time tgt n cuddle,,,

i was only reading some manga today, regular fantasy isekai, called reincarnation of a sword, but i hated how the story progressed so i just. got rly mad at the state of my life rn idk???? tired n upset abt it n also i miss u n like cant believe i want to prioritize u above all else no joke its kind of }:v mood??? idk

n also i wanted to ask for clash but like thats secondary

jn me in mc i was playing w kon n sab n we were killing the ender dragon n also raiding some cities aft that. which is rly high pressure bc theres a lot of enemies after me n its rly easy to die AND i was the only one raiding it bc kon n sab cldnt help as much so they took forever while trying to get to a place i alr cleared out. i was trynna go fast n get the impt stuff for them n get out bc we all hated the place. n they yelled at me for stealing the show n flexing ig

tmr ill b going to sabs house bc they wanna hang out b4 going to nex to eat dinner w yee. and that sounds rly nice but at the same time i feel rly burnt out for sm reason. yes its 4am ig thats probably why i feel awful but. idk i also want cuddles n kisses ig. i wan cute girl (you) n im sorry i didnt get to see u off to sleeb 🥺 i rly wanted to n i was trynna raid asap so i cld but ik ur good girl n sleeb early bc school n i respect that so its nbd but i also rly like u n i wanna tuck u into bed n its like so routine that i miss u dearly at night n also it feels wrong when i cant. like if every day was a chapter you wld b my ending paragraph and if u werent there it wld feel like the chapter ended with tension. idk does that make any sense

also i wanted to lyk that like. im still talking to katelyn right bc of the site n we're friends but like. bestie. i need u to know i forgot to spell her name when we were talking. the aftnoon like 3 to 4 days ago when u were like gonna go ask katelyn or smth. she was going to sleeb bc our aftnoon is usa sleeby time i think and she said goodnight to me with my name but i cldnt mirror it back. i dont know why i thought it was kaitlyn (league of legends???) but ik i dont rmb how to spell it and the fact that u did makes me rly upset platonically and impressed every other manner. because i fucking didnt. 😭 just ic u wanna know how much shes on my mind (shes not. i miss u a whole lot. i want to sleeb w u agn)

bestie i hope ur day at sch goes okay 🥺🥺 n ill sleeb early w u i promise im not even gonna touch mc past 11 any more idk why it makes me feel sick but ik it does n im just. i want to stop feeling awful n up at 3 to 6 am during the hols. i miss you a lot n if i cld i wld like to follow u everywhere n help u out 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 pls keep me close like ur pet or ur little meow meow,,,

ilysm cutie 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 i wish i was cuddling u instead of blahaj atm even if he is comfy. i wan giv u so many kiss n brush ur hair n tell u ur cute n go head empty i always go head empty when ur arnd and i like that... ure an angel 🥺🥺🥺🙏❤️

thank u bestie gnight 🥺🥺🙏

[dirtycreekwater]

YESSSS LITTLE!VIRGIL GIVES ME LIFEE How about Virgil losing his paci/bear/something and he's panicking trying to find it

good 👏🏻 shit 👏🏻

-Virgil’s favorite plushy in the entire world is the little black bear cub he named Scout. it once belonged to Roman, but he let him hold it during a panic attack then let him keep it so he had a pretty strong attachment to it.

-One day, while he was home alone, he realized he didn’t know where it was, and started panicking. he looked everywhere for it. he checked the closet where he usually kept it, on the bed, under the bed, the bookshelf, the laundry baskets, the dresser & side table drawers, the bathroom, Patton’s room, the coffee table in the living room, under the coffee table, the couch, under the couch, the bookshelves, the dining room table, under the table, the kitchen table, under the table, the cupboards, the drawers, hell he even checked the fridge & freezer. it was nowhere to be found. he slid down the fridge to the floor, and started crying. he cried into his hoodie sleeves, and tried to keep his breathing normal for a little while. he didn’t want to admit it to himself, but he was starting to feel little. he really wished someone would come home, and comfort him. despite feeling guilty for burdening him he pulled out his phone, and texted Roman.

lil prince🖤: Roman 😔princey💘: what’s wrong, my love?lil prince🖤: i can’t find Scout,,princey💘: aw, baby are you okay?lil prince🖤: no 😞princey💘: ok im gonna come home & help you looklil prince🖤: nooooo ur busyprincey💘: rehearsals are finished, love. im helping Thomas clean up, but he won’t mind if i leave.lil prince🖤: if you say so… just don’t tell him why ur leaving pls.. ik he’s cool with the whole little thing i just feel kinda silly being upset over losing a stuffed animal. just say i had an anxiety attack so u need to check on me or something. it wouldn’t be a total lie princey💘: ok i won’t tell him, baby. & it isn’t silly. Scout means a lot to you.princey💘: wait shit you had an anxiety attack? are you alright?lil prince🖤: yeah i guess. my chest still hurts a lil, but i can breatheprincey💘: ok well that’s good. do you feel little?lil prince🖤: lil bit,,princey💘: get some water & snacks and get in bed. ill be there in a few minprincey💘: healthy snacks, Verge.lil prince🖤: ok,,, i love u 💕princey💘: i love you too, my little prince😘🖤

-Virgil stood up, and grabbed a water bottle out of the fridge. he then grabbed a kitchen chair, and pushed it over to the counter so he could stand on it, and reach the highest shelf in the cupboard. there was a stash of candy he knew Logan hid from him there. he’d probably get in trouble for taking some without asking later, especially since Roman told him to get something healthy, but he didn’t care. he needed comfort food. once he got everything he needed he put the chair back in place then headed up to lay in bed, and wait for Roman. once he got all snuggled up in the blankets he started scrolling through tumblr, but stopped when he got a new text from Roman.

princey💘: baby guess whatlil prince🖤: i dont wanna guess tell meprincey💘: oh you’re no fun🙄lil prince🖤: tell meeeeeeeprincey💘: i found Scout. you left him in my car.lil prince🖤: r u fucking kidding meprincey💘: hey watch your language, little one. & no im not kidding. he was on the passenger seat floor this whole time.lil prince🖤: wait ur not texting & driving r uprincey💘: no, dear. im stupid, but im not that stupid. i haven’t left yet.lil prince🖤: ok good just checkingprincey💘: well thank you for checking💖i’m gonna head home now. see you in a few min. i love you, babylil prince🖤: i love u 💕

-A few minutes later Roman came into the room, and dangled Scout above Virgil’s head. Virgil grinned, and snatched him out of Roman’s hand. Roman smiled, and climbed into bed then pulled Virgil into his lap. “Hi, baby.” Virgil leaned up to give Roman a kiss then said, “Thank you for finding Scout. I thought he was gone forever.” Roman chuckled, and said, “I’d never let him be gone forever, sweetheart.” Virgil smirked, and said, “You don’t really have much control over that, but I appreciate the thought.” Roman rolled his eyes, and started to say, “Oh, come on. Just let me be-” but cut himself off when he noticed what snacks Virgil had picked out, “Virgil. I said healthy snacks. Those don’t look very healthy.” Virgil immediately reached over, and pushed all the candy under the blanket then looked up at Roman, and asked, “What are you talking about?” in the most innocent voice he could muster. Roman sighed dramatically, and said, “You are incorrigible. Will you ever listen to what I say?” Virgil was about to respond, but his phone dinging stopped him. he looked down to see he had a text from Logan.

my nerd💙: Hey, baby. I’m coming home soon. How are you?baby🖤: kinda shaken up. i couldn’t find Scout earlier, but Roman found him in his car & came home to comfort memy nerd💙: Aw, my poor baby. I’m happy he has been found.baby🖤: me toomy nerd💙: Did you behave while we were gone?baby🖤: yes,, i spent most of the time looking for Scoutmy nerd💙: Hm. What did you do the rest of the time?baby🖤: had an anxiety attack. ya know as you do. just some casual, fun stuffmy nerd💙: Very funny. Are you okay? Did you drink water?baby🖤: yes. im good, Lo.my nerd💙: Good. What did you do after that?baby🖤: nothing,, just waited for Romanmy nerd💙: I have a feeling you aren’t telling me the whole truth. I’ll figure it out once I get home. I’m going to leave now. I love you.baby🖤: good luck with that 😈 i love u too nerd 💕my nerd💙: Well, now I know for a fact you did something you weren’t supposed to do.baby🖤: 👿my nerd💙: Yep. You definitely did something.baby🖤: Loooo i love uuuuuuuu 😋💖my nerd💙: Being cute won’t get you out of trouble.baby🖤: Roman pinched me!my nerd💙: Accusing Roman of harming you, or being mean to you won’t get you out of it either.baby🖤: but he really did :cmy nerd💙: Well, pout until he feels bad. That usually works. I really need to stop texting now, baby. I’ll see you in a few minutes.

-A few minutes later Logan came into the room, and the first thing he said was, “Virgil, you little delinquent. You took candy from the stash.” Virgil immediately yelled, “Roman said I could!” Roman scoffed, and said, “Oh, no. I don’t think so, little liar. I told you to get something healthy, and you disobeyed me!” Virgil pouted, and said, “I was sad, and wanted comfort food..” Logan sighed, and sat on the bed then said, “How did you even know where the stash was this time? I don’t recall telling you, or letting you see it. Besides even if I did I would have relocated it like I usually do.” Virgil said, “I overheard you tell Roman where it was.” Roman laughed, and said, “Not as careful as you think you are huh, teach?” Logan glared at Roman, and was about to reply, but Virgil crawled over, and straddled his waist so they’d pay attention to him instead of bickering then said, “I’m sorry I took candy without asking. I was really sad, and needed something to make me feel better.. I won’t do it again..” Logan sighed as he held Virgil by his hips, and said, “It’s okay, baby. I’ll let it slide this time.” Virgil smiled, and gave Logan a quick peck on the lips. Logan smiled, and reached over to grab Scout. he put Scout into Virgil’s hands, and kissed his forehead then said, “Keep better track of him, love.” Virgil nodded then rested his head against Logan’s shoulder. he held Scout close to him, and listened to his boyfriends voices as they talked to each other, and drifted off to sleep. Logan & Roman spent the next few hours putting Scout back in Virgil’s arms every time he was dropped.

((i actually really like where i took this. it’s so cute???? god, little Verge is gonna be the actual death of me.))

[365daysof2017]

50/365

Dear tumblr,

I’m gonna start off my posts like this. Hi it’s me. Ash. I’m back. Sorry I didn’t post much last January but you know me, I get lazy, and I procrastinate. I’m just gonna continue where I left off with my previous blog, 366daysof2016, though, I still can’t process that it’s already 2017. 

So how am I? Great. Honestly, not. Life is really really really complicated. It’s probably really simple, just me making things complicated, I don’t know.

 I actually have been worse. I thought I’ve already moved on from David. You see, I told myself that I already need to forget him and all, and I actually did. I met some guys on kik, some lasted on my chatbox, and some didn’t, but everything seemed okay. Everything seemed okay. Then for some reasons, I started cutting my wrist. I have plans to do it again sometime but, I can still hold it.

Okay back to the “David” topic. Everything keeps coming back and it was really hard for me cause I don’t have any space in my mind to think about him. I’m already thinking about a shit ton of crap in my head, and I don’t want to think about him anymore. I thought I already forgot about him. But everything keeps coming back.

So this one day, last Saturday, we went to an Amusement Park. Nothing connected to him at all. I had so much fun! I got home at around 11PM. Then I had a fucking dream. 

It’s the worst type of dream, cause I was lucid. I’m always lucid when I dream about him, so it makes it  even harder. In my dreame, he went to the Phillipines, he apologized. He did everything. I already kinda forgot, but one thing I remember is that it was fun. I had fun. I was happy.

The morning after, I realized how important he was to me, god I was thinking about him the whole fucking day! How I was so happy with him, how he made me feel special... The whole fucking day.

At around 10PM, I was on kik, just randomly flirting with strangers online. I did something impulsive. I messaged him. 

me: dude me: I fucking hate you so much me: I wasn’t done with you yet and you fucking blocked me. So here’s the time where I was supposed to reply another message cause I was gonna flood him with hate messages, but he fucking replied. Instantly. I didn’t expect that. He never replies fast.

David: Ok. me: You fucking left me hanging David: Yea David: I suppose so me: You even called the night before you blocked me! me: what me: that’s it David: I’m sorry me: no explanation or anything David: I dont know what to say me: right me: just fucking say something please

Oh god I was so annoyed and so pissed and so nervous I felt everything at once. He didn’t even say anything. I wanted to hear something from him. I wanted an explanation. That was the only thing I needed to move on and yet he couldn’t give it to me.

David: I just David: Idk I got caught up with the army David: And I was afraid I’d hurt you David: So I ran from the situation David: Which still hurt you but atleast left room for hate me: and went to her instead me: yup

Ohhh shit put an ice to that burn, bitch.

David: Lol I’m not dating anyone so don’t try that

Uhm excuse me? Don’t you think I know anything you’ve been up to? Man I know everything. I have eyes everywhere. Everywhere. It’s kinda creepy, tbh.

me: lmaooooo me: songia??? David: Go look at my stuff David: Not dating anyone David: In fact we broke up and I slept with someone else and now we don’t talk at all First thing that came up to my mind: He’s not a virgin anymore. LMAOO.

David: So that’s that sticky situation I wasted 2 years on

Ha. Sticky. Cause you slept with someone? LMAO OKAY. me: right me: fuck me: its been months me: and its still you me: fuck you okay David: What do you mean me

Dumb-fucking-ass?? Are you that ignorant? or are you just dumb???

me: I hate you so much me: you’re still the one I remember David: Okay I expect that me: I keep having dreams

(lmao why did I say that?)

David: I’m sorry David: I dont know what to say or do me: and its fucking annoying me: its so hard to forget you me: I keep getting these dreams me: and it just made me remember you even more David: Sorry David: I don’t know what to say

ikr, it’s not like it’s your fault I get the dreams??

me: why did you just block me though me: why didn’t you atleast say something David: Trying to run again David: Realized it’s not the right thing to do David: I don’t have anything to say David: You’re right I shouldn’t have left you hanging David: It was wrong of me David: I thought about it too David: I felt bad David: But I couldn’t face it me: fuck you for leaving me when I already fell for you. me: you even said you’re gonna go here me: ugh David: Fuck me David: Okay I get it David: You hate me David: I’m shit David: Leave me alone if that’s all you want to say

Seriously dude, do you really not sense my purpose here? I want you back.

me: I just wanted an explanation lol me: and I didn’t want you to leave me: those were the words you said and I can’t believe I’m saying it me: I don’t want you to leave me alone

So that’s it that’s the serious part. The next part of our conversation wasn’t as long as this one but we were just bantering around. I don’t think he’s as comfortable with me as he was before but I feel like there’s still something.

I just feel so confused about my feelings for him, confused about what we are, confused about what he feels for me. Last Friday, he sent me a message, and I was in school

9:51 AM David: Hey David: You busy?

So I read it during my lunch time cause we were doing something

11:39 AM me: I’m in school

1:42 PM David: Call me after

2:32 PM me: I can’t I have like 100MB left

9:43 PM David: Ughh David: Noooo David: When do you get more David: You are legit so cute David: In your picture David: And your body looks good lol David: JUST SAYING.

I wasn’t able to reply cause I was watching this Selena Gomez film, Monte Carlo. It was really nice btw, I loved it.

11:00 PM me: LMAOOO me: I’m home now it’s like 11 David: What lol. David: I know, I know David: Why you laugh. me: idk me: whats up David: Laying in bed being lazy David: Hbu Piper

Fuck. Right in the feels. So much nostalgia. Piper’s the daughter of Aphrodite in the series that we love, he used to call me Piper, and I told him if I’m Piper then he’s the Jason to my Piper. (Jason’s the love interest of Piper in the books)

me: I just finished watching a movie me: and it was greatttt I loved it David: What movie? David: *sends a cute selfie* David: Lol look @ me

okay so I totally forgot that he asked a question cause a cute fucking selfie just popped in my screen.

me: you look different David: Do I? David: How so?? David: Bad huh David: Thanks I’m ugly ik me: yeah idk me: you look happy me: no wdym ugly David: I am ugly David: You making fun of me lol David: Thanks me: wtf you’re not ugly shut up me: what time is it there me: and where are you David: I’m in kentucky US David: And it is 0912 there!

Idk that’s probably how they read time in the army

David: Girl you’re obsessed David: Lmao jkjk me: ruuude David: No me: Kentucky though me: KFC David: I like you dw

okay... fuck... that was sudden. I mean, good job! That’s a great way to make me even more confused about what’s happening here!

me: ha David: Yes lmao! David: It’s not that good David: I figured it would be the best here David: But it’s the same as everywhere else me: really? me: that’s sad David: It’s nothing special David: Send me a selfie? me: I dont have a selfie me: jk David: Send me one David: Now David: I order you me: dude me: chill David: Lol nope I wanna seee youuuu me: I’m still looking for something decent David: Send them all David: Right meow me: *sends a selfie* me: tada me: I like that one lmao me: hoe filter me: I got more pimples me: smhhhh me: *sends another selfie* me: and one time my hair became like this hahah David: Fucking cute David: Is that overalls lol me: yes hahah

Then he left me on read. But because I’m a creepy-ass stalker that knows his facebook account, I saw his post that he shared. The post said, “I like clingy. I’d rather have someone who blows up my phone and shows they care than someone who texts back 12 hours later” So I messaged him this morning. I didn’t care if I double texted. 

me: dude me: when are you free David: Not tonight, I don’t think me: aw but when David: Idk I’m with jocelyn rn

Who’s Jocelyn???

me: ohh okay me: tell me when you’re available David: Okay

So that was it. I notice that I keep on using the word ‘dude’. Idk what to call him?? Maybe I’ll refer to him as Jason soon. Back to his facebook though, he also shared a post that said, “I blocked my ex on everything but she somehow managed to message me through direct tv *a pic of that*”.. Well.. Was that me? Lol. I dont know!! Someone commented though, “Man, if she goes through that much trouble to try to talk to you I would have to give her a second chance haha” then he replied, “that’s true hahah” UGH ITS JUST SO CONFUSING. So that’s all I have to say about him.

Now I’m here typing this blog. I don’t know, I just wanna talk to him, on the phone. Maybe that’d clear things up, but for now, I never think about our future. I don’t wanna think about the next step, cause when it doesn’t happen, I’m just gonna be twice disappointed. 

This was really a long first blogpost. See ya next time. 

Love, Ash

[survivorpanem]

EPISODE TEN - “I’M THE JAIDEN WHISPERER “ - JC

Tribal council certainly was interesting tonight. I wonder what caused Samantha to use her onion necklace on me... I'm actually kind of pissed off that she did that, even though I had voted for her in the first place. It makes me think that that knew I had voted for her or something, which is what caused the vote to flip around. Isaac and Jordan and Andrew all really fucked up and Jordan paid the price for it. I kind of wish that someone had played their idol for Jordan just to see their reaction when Andrew ends up getting the boot, so now I'm pretty sure one of them have it. Jake missed out on a ton of stuff which wouldn't have been vastly different if he had stuck around instead of going off to exile. From now on, I won't stray from the alliance. It's pretty obvious that they all were going to wake-up and start playing only when it became convenient to them all, and that's why Jordan got voted off. They were going to use my vote for Zack against me in the future to help Zack flip against me or something? Power move, good job losers. I'm going to completely own up to voting for Sam B as soon as possible. I have no doubt that she got the same advantage that I had and checked to see if I was intending on flipping on the alliance. But wouldn't that have sent me out instead of Jordan??? Who honestly knows. It changes a lot in the game now and I'm pretty pissed off that this all went downhill as quickly as it did, because now I need to make a massive apology to Samantha for voting for her. I don't know what I'll say, but I'll need to think of something. And quick.

OK SO BITCH SO!! That tribal was i n s a n e! Zack approached me at like 9:40 telling me that my weird suspicions were right and that people were trying to make a move to take me out. Apparently Isucc/Boredan/AndrEW approached Sam Bussy asking her to vote me out. Now what worries me is that she did not tell me about them approaching her, Zack did. So she must have been at least considering it? Idk her and Isaac are relatively close and ik she was worried about whether or not Isaac would be mad at her if she voted Jordan instead of me. But anyways I'm like oh boo not today, not today! Like I was really unworried by their bumasses because I'm like girls, I have an idol, a vote negator, AND Sam told me about her blood bracelet that had to be played at that tribal, so I was just like might as well just get her to play that on me so I don't need to use anything. So like I got Sam to switch her blood thing from Jaiden to me after she used a vote sneak in order to see who Isaac really voted for and turned out he truly did vote for me! How cute. Like I don't know why these little boys came for me but they did, like I was not a threat I feel like my game has been shit but ok I guess just keep pushing me to be better huh?! Oh, and apparently Jaiden voted for Samantha to try to stir up distrust between Zack and I and cause rifts in the alliance. But then later he switched it to Andrew because he was getting nervous I guess? Idk I don't buy it but knowing Jaiden it's highly possible. But I'm like atm I want to take out Isaac/Andrew before taking out Jaiden because they both actually voted me with intents of getting me out and for that they need to go, especially as Isaac probably has an idol. Like I feel like he was gonna play it on Jordan but changed his mind last minute after Sam played her bracelet on me. and like now I'm worried because it's only f8 and I have a target on my back. Totally not what I wanted at this stage in the game! I have to really work hard to keep myself safe because my advantages don't make me invincible. I need to make FTC in this game and it's most likely going to be a f2 since jury started at f11 rifpp. I hate f2's! But yeah I just have to keep fighting and look at the bright sides, like I solidified loyalty and cleansed paranoia between my relationships with Sam and Zack, I still have an idol and I'm still fighting. My game plan honestly is to go to my sponsors and get them to buy vote sneaks for me because that would be heavily beneficial to see who's voting who.

Samantha is on my birthday shitlist, basically. I still don't trust her so I spilled the beans to JC about her maybe sorta considering voting for Zack. Also that she played the onion necklace on me. Regardless, someone knows that I voted for her. And now I'm out for blood! I will absolutely expose her vote at the next tribal council, AND I'll make I think my priority to send her right to the bottom of the alliance like she deserves at this point. Samantha if you're reading this and you're like, you're completely wrong Jaiden, then that's your fault for playing the onion necklace on me (envy) But I still love you outside of this whole game...but I still hope you get seventh place. Sorry not sorry. I'm going to CONTINUE to hammer in the idea that FLIPPERS NEVER WIN. If you flip on the alliance, enjoy losing solely because of a bitter jury :)

Me trying to escape the SNAKES who voted me last week and may try to again http://suprchnk.tumblr.com/post/152885516750

Later...

Omg poor Sam she's coming up with all these cracked out theories of where the idol could be that are actually kind of wildly accurate (she thought the idol may be hidden in the beach bc of the moodboard Amir made her having many sea themes, and it was in the beach), but the idol is in my pocket akxhxbabz. Maybe I should tell her...idk aaaa!!!

so to #catch up on my messy ass game, i was exiled for a round and apparently things got even more messy. i honestly barely understand what happened bc no one wants to give me a full story but yeah jordan lelft which was my contract thing?? no idol clue for me rip. but now i guess a lot of people want my vote which is nice. zack told me that jaiden was telling people that i was threatening bc of my comp wins in generations, neverland, and sarawak and its so annoying!! like bitch u think i have time in my life to dedicate to these immunity challenges like i could in gens when i had 24/7 of my summer dedicated to it?? bitch?? and u went against me ONCE in sarawak and look how that turned out. haha they never learn, do they? there's already talk about getting jaiden out and i'd be MORE than delighted to send his ass packing bc i literally cannot DEAL with him targeting me for no reason A G A I N!!!!! jaiden: jake won immunities in gens everyone: omg :O hes laying low… me: i literally just have no time to dedicate to this game god these fucking freaks. anyway i cant stand most of these ppl.. andrew is honestly my son and i love him so i dont want him to go. and it was nice to hear zack wants isaac and jaiden out back to back bc that protects lil andrew. i dont even talk to andrew like ever but for some reason hes the only one i trust bc ik he only has like isaac in the game. i dont trust either of the sams. especially sam g?? that girl is like killin it i feel like everyone is just following her around. have barely spoken to her but shes doing her thing. i hope i can get her out soon but literally no one wants to make a move against her. props to her i guess. i want JC gone soon, he's so transparent and fake and ldskjfghkj yeah i don't like dealing with it. i mean i'm fake right back so i mean dflksgjhdklfjgh me. unless i get lucky with immunities im gonna have to rely on keeping a low profile and telling people im doing nothing (which is partly true, i did do THAT at the allison vote). a lot of people are telling me they like me so... that's good! the more ppl who like me the better!!! i like zack a lot i hope the f3 is me zack and andrew but one can dream huh!

Soo last tribal was WILD! I was gunna just play my bracelet on Jaiden and say it was because he's always a target so to put his mind at ease for once blah blah blah but then like 15 minutes before tribal JC comes to me freaking out about people voting for him and he needs the bracelet blah blah blah, so I asked Isaac who he voted for and he told me Jordan. Then just to make sure I played my map of the arena and checked out Isaacs vote and found out THAT LYING SNAKE VOTED FOR JC!! So I played my bracelet on JC even though they only got 3 votes, Jordan got 4, and Andrew got 1. Also apparently that 1 for Andrew WAS for Sam B but then Sam looked at Jaidens vote and played her onion necklace on him meaning he can't vote for her until the final 6? Or after the final 6? Either way I was really expecting this to cause distrust in our 5 but apparently it still hasn't? I'm so shook that we're all still voting together but like maybe I'll be proven wrong tonight? We'll see. Either way we're al so dysfunctional and terrible at communication so I mean how are we doing this?? I was hoping to save Andrew and Isaac but apparently people want Andrew out. Hopefully he has an idol but he'd idol out Jaiden and not Sam B which kind of stinks. But anyways I'm waiting for more exciting stuff to happen this tribal because last time was the first exciting tribal in a while. This merge has been pretty yawn and frankly I'm part of the problem.

I wasn't going to talk about it but I need to post a confessional and the reason I'm feeling the way I am is tied into personal stuff and it won't make sense unless I explain it to you so here it goes. I've just been feeling extremely shitty about myself recently and just overall really lonely. Like in the past two weeks I've felt like my friends have been doing whatever they can not to talk to me. It's irrational but it's how I've felt. But Jordan and Samantha B were mostly there and they helped everything by just being there and talking to me. So yeah I've taken his elimination pretty hard. According to many sources Samantha B was the one who told Jc that it was them who was getting votes and caused Jordan's elimination and the idol play. I was really apprehensive about believing anyone because I thought there was no way she'd do that to me like we've became closer friends since this game started, but then she admitted to it. I'm not going to lie I'm hurt But this is a game and we're supposed to play to win so thank you Sam B for waking me up. I'm NOT going to lay down and die if I go out tonight I'll go out trying to get as far as I can. Is this the second coming of Despairsaac? Maybe. But Jesus Christ I'm tired of these people telling me what I will and will not do. Fuck them. 

I've made it so far in the game without wanting to make any big moves, so tonight I'll make one. If I get rocked out, then #legend. If I get blindsided by the entire tribe, then so be it. But I had to stand up and do something, because fifth place just wasn't going to cut it. I wanna win, damnit. People can respect someone who went against the grain and made a move, right? I surely will receive Andrew and Isaac's respect if this doesn't work out. The plan is to vote for Sam G. If she plays an idol, Andrew goes home and I look like a chump. If anyone gets pissed, they will either flip their vote to her, or they will draw rocks and leave it up to chance. Either way, I get what I want. I'll be okay with leaving tonight if that's what happens, because at least I did something... I just dont want to go 7-1 because everyone was pissed off.

Okay so truthfully this game I've felt like I'm the Jaiden Whisperer. He's like completely wild and messy in this game but I feel like I've been able to direct it to things I want, or at least work with the insanity. But it's coming to the point where he's really rubbing people the wrong way, Zack and Jakey both want to vote him and Sam Bussy probably would too if she hadn't played the onion on him. Not only that but Isaac and Andrew both wanna vote him too!! That's 4 which is enough to tie, and jaidens dumb ass might vote for Jakey instead of Isaac!! Mess omg. I totally feel bad to be campaigning for Isaac/Andrew to go, but like what choice do I have after they came for me first? I feel like it'd be dumb to vote out either jakey or Jaiden because they're both good for my game and the others are most probably not! OMFG NOW JAIDENS TALKING TO JAKE ABOUT GOING TO ROCKS WHAT IN THE FUCK OMFGGGGG KILL ME. He needs to freaking rest before his ass gets sent home!! This vote is honestly the largest fucking mess, we have Jaiden who wants to vote out Jakey, Jakey who wants to vote out Jaiden, Zack who wants to vote out Isaac only if not Jaiden, Samantha who I think wants to vote out Isaac or Andrew and Sam G who wants to vote out Samantha later but Jakey now. KILL ME WHY CANT WE JUST VOTE ONE OF ISAAC/ANDREW OUT HNNNNG I TOLD JAIDEN TO JUST STAY SEATED AND TO NOT CAUSE DRAMA WHEN HE ASKED ME IF HE SHOULD MESSAGE PEOPLE BECAUSE I KNEW EVERYONE WAS ON THEIR LAST STRAWS WITH HIM AND WHAT DOES HE DO??? DOESNT LISTEN AT ALL!! OMG I CANT HONESLEE Like bitCH WHY DID JAKEY SEND ME THIS: [12/7/16, 7:32:21 PM] j a i d e n: but I don't think I can win against my alliance and I know they're coming for you once it gets down to it [12/7/16, 7:32:40 PM] j a i d e n: you, me, Isaac, Andrew vote for one of them, and they vote for one of Andrew/Isaac FUCK IT HES LEAVING TONIGHT EVERYONE WANTS HIS HEAD ON A STICK EXCEPT PROBABLY SAM B AND FHATS JUST BECAUSE SHE PLAYED HER ONION ON HIM UGHHH I LOVE YOU JAIDEN BUT WHAT CAN I DO YOU PUSHED IT

I feel soooo bad about lying to Isaac. I really want to work with him and get Jaiden out but there just aren't numbers for that. Me, Isaac, Andrew, and Jakey is only 4. All that would do is tie it. But Jaiden has been super messy lately, especially with jakey, so hopefully Jc will read the message jakey sends him from jaiden and will realize that jaiden is a horrible player. Like honestly I love jaiden as a person but he is messy af when it comes to spilling information. And not even information, its anything. Jaiden tells so many lies, for no reason it seems like. This is just super messy. As much as I love jc and zack, I think I want to work with Isaac and Andrew from now on. But I just hope they trust me enough to let me do that.

So way too much has happened/is happening for like a paragraph based confessional, so here's a lot of bullets of whats happened bc I'm an organized hoe. -Zack wins immunity and Isaac and I are like fuck what do we do -It seemingly looks like Isaac, Sam B, and I are on the outs -We find out that it's between Isaac and I -Sam G tells me that Sam B is the one who leaked to JC that they were going so that Sam G could play her idol on them and get out Jordan -Isaac doesn't wanna believe it but Sam B sketches me out -The 3 of us still decide anyway that we need 5 votes to take out Jaiden bc that's the easiest target -Zack and I have gotten surprisingly close and he doesn't want me going -Zack wants Jaiden out -I go to Jakey and ask about getting out Jaiden and he's down -I go to bed and we seemingly have 5 votes to eliminate Jaiden -I come home today to find I'm the name being thrown around and Jaiden is the one to tell me -Sam B is being very sketchy in the alliance chat -She then admits to Isaac that she told JC they were getting votes and apologized but has ultimately lost our trust -We now don't know what the vote is going to be and scramble -Jaiden comes to Isaac and I saying he will go to rocks for me if we can get Jakey on our side -He makes a chat and the 4 of us agree to vote either Sam G or JC bc Jaiden cannot vote Sam B -We decide on Sam G so that someone may be more willing to flip on her rather than JC in a tie vote -Sam G and JC suddenly wanna work with Isaac and I again and want to vote out Jaiden who wants to help Isaac and I also -Jaiden might be doing the rocks plan more for himself/to make chaos -Jakey also makes the point that Isaac, himself, and I will be in minority next week if we vote out Jaiden -I ask him if he thinks Zack would flip to us and he doesn't think so and asks if I would sacrifice Isaac next round -I don't wanna do that and ask if Zack might flip on Sam G and JC to break up the duo at final 7 So now I'm at a conflict. Jaiden wants to go to rocks for us. But that might be to create chaos. Idk where Sam B is voting but she might be voting me but now people wanna vote Jaiden. So if it does tie and we vote with Jaiden, then it could tie between Jaiden and Sam G and then they're safe from rocks of I flip on Jaiden. So Jaiden might be doing this to save his own ass because according to Sam G, Jaiden thinks I'm voting him anyway. So I have no fucking clue what to do. We all helped build a web of lies and now everyone is running up a different thread. And it's utter chaos. And I need to make the move that I think will help me advance to the end after this if I stay tonight.

Later...

Okay I also left out that Jake revealed the rock plan to Sam G and JC, so now Sam G knows she might be getting votes and Jaiden might play his thing on me to reveal my vote before he votes and if he sees I didn't vote Sam G, then he'll be suspicious. And he might have an idol so idk. I think I'll vote Sam G anyway in the case that either Jaiden sees how I votes and pulls some sketchy shit, or the rock plan actually goes down. I asked Sam G if she cares if I vote her so Jaiden isn't sus but she doesn't wanna be potentially idoled out. I'm gonna tell her I'm throwing to Sam B, but I'll vote her anyway. I just have to to be safe. Wish me luck™.

im voting for jaiden since hes a mess and my alliance wants him gone. I'll explain more in my next confessional. im gonna take a nap