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#dont get addicted to nicotine kids
pups-2-dust · 10 months
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50 doll hairs is a small price to pay for an Arizona mucho mango and enough nicotine and nicotine accessories to make it through the rest of the month
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cptnbeefhrt · 1 month
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im guna use this dumbahh dead blog as a dumping ground for my feelings since less ppl know im on here but genuinely what is the point. like at all. every time sumn genuinely good comes into my life theres either a catch or sumn 2x worse happens after. i was hospitalized earlier this year after my dad died n my life has literally j gotten worse n worse since i got out. i literally do not have a reason to keep living n never had n the only reason i’ve stayed n continue to stay is bcus i dont wanna fuck up the attempt n be in even more pain😭 like yay i got an apartment. now im struggling to find a new job and my mom got fired from hers yesterday. my life is so comically bad its genuinely a joke. n i wish i could tell yall im glad ive made it this long but i’m not
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aeoncss · 6 months
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…some of my personal movie!mike schmidt hcs <3
disclaimer: you dont have to agree, just don’t be an ass. thanks!
tw: parent/sibling death, mentions of insecurity, nightmares, trauma flashbacks, some nsfw (18+!), could be ooc?? idk?? don’t quote me on it
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he’s a soft snorer. like the faintest sound comes through at night, and it’s usually when he’s laying on his back. when he’s sick, however, he snores so loud that abby has definitely thrown something at him to be quiet.
used to smoke cigarettes quite heavily. started in high school, then it turned into muscle memory that escalated into a harsh nicotine addiction. the second abby complained about the smell, mike stopped cold turkey, and hasn’t picked up a pack since.
does, occasionally, smoke weed though. usually in his car or in his garage late at night. spends extra time cleaning around and getting the smell out, including doing an extra load of laundry so his clothes don’t reek. it helps him sleep, although doesn’t do much for the nightmares.
mike has one of those huge CD books shoved underneath his passenger seat (it won’t fit in the glove box). it’s filled with many broken disks that are heavily scratched from use, and a lot of them belonged to his father.
he’s so bad at folding. so bad. he either hangs it up super sloppily or straight up just throws his clothes into his closet.
he prefers dogs over cats — although he takes the time to feed one of the neighborhood stray cats that abby has named ‘mr. whiskers’ because that’s gonna become his pet goddamn it
listens to a lot of korn, foo fighters, deftones, and the offspring. mike kinda refuses to play that kind of music in the car with abby around, so he might have grown to subconsciously love spice girls and a*teens as well…
grows insecure when he finds himself in a relationship, feeling like he equally can’t be enough or that he’s doing too much. mike has such a fear of pushing away good things from him, so it takes a lot of reassurance for him to finally understand that he isn’t doing anything wrong.
falls asleep during horror and romance movies. physically just can’t do it.
he can’t ever listen to the romantics ever again. if he hears even a snippet of ‘talking in your sleep’, his body straight up shuts down and mike goes into automatic panic mode.
service switch — really, he just wants to please his partner in any way. he doesn’t have a preference for anything sexually related, but he definitely gets a kick out of how good he can make his lover feel. he might have studied one too many playboys.
he doesn’t really realize how much he craves affection until after he gets into a relationship. whenever his partner leaves for the night, he feels like a piece of him is somehow lost, and he nonstop thinks about how nice it was to just be in their arms — even if it was just for a short moment.
besides the reoccurring nightmare of garrett, mike developed a new one after the events at the pizzeria. he can’t save abby in time, the sound of spring locks echoing deep inside his brain that he wakes up so physically ill. he has to go check in on her to get himself to calm down.
has a few really shitty stick n’ poke tattoos that one of his old high school buddies did while drunk together. he has a little stick figure on the inside of his left wrist, and a horribly disproportionate star on his right.
he’s a moaner. not a loud one, but there has been times where he’s either had to cover up his mouth by a pillow or even by his partners hand. it’s not overtly obnoxious or dramatic, more hushed pants and quick whimpers that escape deep from his throat. when he’s close, that’s when he gets a bit louder, the sound almost guttural.
he really gets a kick out of seeing his partner in his clothes or just doing something in his house. sitting on the couch just TV surfing? he’s hiding behind the doorway to the kitchen just so he can try and get his hard-on to go away.
mike was the type of kid in high school that genuinely did try to pass with good grades, but he just barely managed to scrape by without getting held back from graduation. it’s a regret of his, but understands what was going on during that time.
nicknamed his honda accord ‘marvin’.
really into making out, sometimes preferring it over sex. he likes the closeness and just enjoys the action of kissing — plus, it’s really nice foreplay.
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ddejavvu · 2 years
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so um hi!! i have like this stupid thought and i need to spread it lmao 💀💀 so basically let's say reader is trying to quit cigarettes/vapes ( possibly lets make it modern lol) cause you know its bad and she has like this urge to constantly touch her lips (i saw on tiktok that there is this psychological thing that things touching your lips send postive signals to your brain but its from tiktok so i dont think its valid information lol) but back to the point- so eddie being a loving boyfriend he is to help her with her addiction basically told her to just suck him off every time she gets the urge to smoke
god fuck this is a good idea-
this post is 18+, minors dni.
Eddie glances sideways at you from his spot on the couch, seeing your finger between your lips. You're gnawing at the nail which, like your others, are raw.
"Hey," He chides, reaching out to swat your hand away from your mouth, "Get that outta there."
"Eddie," You whine, crocodile tears lining your eyes, "I need something in my mouth! My nail's the best I've got."
He sympathizes with you, he really does. He'd only quit smoking because of the younger kids he hangs out with, after Dustin developed a chest cough he refrained from smoking around him. The rest was easy, once he'd started cutting back it wasn't hard to continue until he didn't crave any nicotine at all.
"I know it's hard," He flicks pause on the remote, lolling his head to the side to face you, "Why don't you get some candy or something?"
You shake your head vehemently, "No, no, food won't work. I need something, like, solid. Permanent. It's about my lips, not my mouth."
He has an idea. He feels like a children's cartoon, brows dipping and eyes narrowing, lips curling into a smirk. You notice the expression and stall, quirking one of your own brows up.
"Eddie...?"
"Get on your knees."
He relishes the reveal, the reality of his idea hitting you like a ton of bricks. Your mouth drops open and it only makes him tease you more, 'That's the idea.'
"Eddie," You follow his orders, sliding tentatively off the couch and landing on your knees, "'You sure?"
"Why would I say no?" He snickers, fingers already prying at his jeans to unfurl the zipper, "Go ahead, sweetheart."
You reach for his boxers, lightly palming him over the fabric. He relaxes his posture, eyes locked onto your kneeling form. It doesn't take him long to stiffen, between your touch and the view he has.
You can't help but chuckle, "You're excited."
"You need my dick in your mouth or else you'll start biting your fingers off," Eddie sneers, sensitive not only to touch but to teasing, "Don't insult me."
"Sor-ry," You huff, dipping your neck to kitten lick at the head of his cock, "I didn't even ask for this, y'know. You were the one who-"
Eddie jerks his hips upwards, cutting you off by jamming his cock between your lips. He doesn't hit the back of your throat but you gag all the same, eyes widening as tears well in your waterline.
"Desperate and mouthy," Eddie drawls, condescending grin on his face, "Get your fix, babe, 'cause if you keep talking back I'll zip up."
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skullvgirl · 4 months
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buffed up like a jock geeked up like a nerd | barou
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warnings. fem reader, school!au, ooc, very stereotypical high school tropes, angst no comfort
an's. felt like writing for him, hes so unproblematic and deserves a fic dedicated to him so here it is sillies.
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"you know there's a party at reo's house tonight" nagi remarked casually, more focused on his nintendo game rather than what was happening at the lunch table.
"of course there is, theres always a party" isagi rolled his eyes, poking a fork at his food.
"yeah. he told me too tell you guys anyways" nagi didn't look up from his game too see bachira wrap his arm around isagi trying to convince him to let him go.
sometimes I can't believe this is the smart kids table...
you popped a fry in your mouth as other people discussed the details of the event ( although it was kind hard getting any details out of nagi when he was glued too his game )
"yn are you going?"
you thought about it for a moment. It was almost the end of your year and you had only been too one this year, you went with isagi and bachira but lost them during the night eventually left out of boredom.
"nah...probably not. reo can live without me "
"oh come on yn, you never go! like ever, it's almost the end of the year, learn to live a little" bachira had now slung an arm around the both of you, making an exaggerated pouty face.
you shook your head, you werent convinced. "i'll make isagi come—and I'll sneak you his notes! please?"
you looked at isagi and he shook his head. "no, really meguru I'm okay"
nagi's attention was suddenly diverted by you repeated rejection. "oh an I almost forgot, reo said yn HAS too come or else he'll convince coach to make all of varsity team is run relays."
the table was suddenly sent into an uproar at thr statement and now suddenly everyone was trying to convince you too go too the party.
although there persuasion skills were lacking.
"I'll do your chores for a week!"
"you don't live with me bachira..."
"i'll pay you!"
"I don't want your money isagi..."
"i'll write your AP English essay."
"what?" now that had gotten your attention. the words came from barou shouei. the #1 acedemic student at BLLK HIGH. and well...you weren't one too cheat but...it was barou shouei we were talking about. how could you pass something like that up?
"deal"
soon ehough party day was here and you found yourself outside of reo's house doors isagi and bachira at you sides.
"well?" bachira said excitedly "what are we waiting for?" the chaos took over quickly, bachira had somehow been roped into getting body shots from the cheerleader girls and isagi was lying blackout drunk across the kissing couch—which did I mention reo and nagi were kissing on.
"and this is why I say no too the parties..."
seeking a moment of peace you went back to your original spot. the front porch steps. you looked around the space for a moment before pulling out the cart you kept handy.
"didn't take the straight-lace, straight A student for a mmoker" And of course that's when Barou approached, a rare smirk playing on his lips.
you sputtered and coughed on the air, immediately fanning away the smoke although it was evident you had been smoking. "I don't"
You stood up abruptly but wobbled from the speed. Barou was there too catch you. "Woah careful there...don't want our pot addict getting injured now do we..." he gleaned.
was he...? "Dont tease, I've already had a long enough of a night..." You sat back down and leaned against the railing.
"My bad, my bad....do you mind?" Barou motioned with his hands and you nodded for him to sit down, his hands dug in his pockets too reach for something you didn't expect.
"Wow didn't expect the D1 soccer player too be a nicotine smoker...."
Barou didn't answer, a sound you were familiar with. "Guess were both addicts then."
"Guess so..." your eyes felt hazy as Barou puffed on his cigarette, his hair was down today and it was long and beautiful as ever.
"Thanks for doing my eassy by the way...it's a huge chunk taken off my plate" Barou didn't answer, only glancing over at your figure tentatively nodding his head. The two of you sat quietly on the porch for a few moments longer—and your not sure how long it had been but eventually you realized you were staring at barou way longer than nessecary.
maybe it was the weed that made you so confident too ask but suddenly something dawned on you.
"barou not too sound like a stalker or anything but why did you offer in the first place...i mean we all know you don't really mind running relays like everyone else."
Barou was quiet for a moment, then squished the light out his cigarette before answering. "Why?" you nodded your head. "So i could do this"
Barou's touch was warm, his presence comforting as he kissed you, it was sweet and smoky and nothing like you'd ever felt before. You wanted more.
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Fuck.
What did you do? It was the day after the party and your could have sworn there was a lingering high that made you so confrontational.
"About last night..." you started, but Barou interrupted.
"It was a mistake," he said, his tone cold. "We were caught up in the moment. It won’t happen again."
Oh!
Oh.
"Right, it's better this way."
You struggled holding back tears.
Fuck.
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an's. last post with this theme btw, I couldn't resist, m sorry. also this was sooo rushed, also very sorry.
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youabandonedthem · 1 year
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Slicktober 2023
otober 1.: spades slick 10,000 years ago oct 2: Spades Slick learns a lesson in consent oct 3: eating and laerning about cultural food from africa, asia, or europe oct4: effects of Spades Slick's candida overgrowth oct 5: battling nicotine addiction in our community oct 6: spades slick takes herbal supplements oct 7: Spades slick.formed an opinion about what he read on reddit oct 8: His friend droog teaches spades slick about consent oct 9: spades slick practicing his religion oct 10: spades Slick became Manorexic oct 11: spades slick shopped at healthy planet to get items on sale but then ate fast food immediately after. oct 12: all the other kids made fun of him because of the way he dressed and acted oct 13: reading and forming an opinion on various historically significant works oct 14: His son karkat helping him or if you dont want to draw a troll then maybe deuce knows how to ..fulfill a ...man's...needs oct 15: teaching raz from psychonauts about consent oct 16: spades slick showing off that he is nimble and quick and can jump over the candlestick oct 17: spades slick became underprivileged oct 18: spades slick calling his credit card company oct 19: spades slick drank infected water oct 20: spades slick has developed physical symptoms after eating fast food. oct 21: Spades slick in the ocean oct 22: It makes spades slick look totally stupid whne he rages at people online! oct 23: spades slick found out dirk is now of age oct 24: spades slick's gut microbiome oct 25: i love you Dr house oct 26: Spades slick swallowed his pride oct 27: spade slick reimagined as a shy woman in a LBD at the bar oct 28: spades slick has had it with the continued attempts at mind control oct 29: Happy birthday joe! oct 30: spdes slick dressed up as the scariest thing of all for halloween. oct 31: spades slick became indie
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quackitlee-hq · 1 year
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{ C! Quackity (tickle) RP blog }
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{ ♤ ♡ ◇ ♧ }
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run by @quiet-gremlin
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{ Important things }
- not kink or nsfw!!
- c! quackity, not cc! quackity
- i am dyslexic!! but i try my best to read through things so they make sense!! lmk if you need something fixed!! /gen
- i (admin) am a minor! so just be careful. i dont want nsfw, or kink being involved. and if you are over the age of 21, just be cautious and know that i am weary of you /nbm/gen
- oc blogs can interact!! but it will be a little funky since im still trying to get used to them!! /gen
{ ♤ ♡ ◇ ♧ }
{ HC'S, Boundaries, Spots, and more! }
(last updated 27/12/23) - boundaries updated, general hcs updated, tk hcs updated!
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{ Boundaries } (important)
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- again, id prefer if 21+ were weary around this blog as i am a minor. but u can interact!!
- ABSOLUTELY NO NSFW OR ADULT CONTENT. THIS IS NOT KINK
- i will absolutely do angst!! either in dms or here i can go however far youd like!!! literally anything i am so down!! i love angst <3
- i am comfy with any character interacting!! even if they have problems!! we can either pretend they didnt happen, or give them a little kiss and make up story!!
- im also okay with ships!! if u and ur guy wanna date quackity, just lmk and we can go over the details!! :D
- pls no feet stuff or bondage. they make me uncomfortable.
- my dms r always open!!! and also please dont rush me on roleplays. i get busy, and ill get to you!! (normally im pretty fast, like a couple days inbetween)
- ill add more if i need to!!!
- please please send your ask. idc what it is. just wanna be haha funny and make jokes?? okay!!! do you wanna just say funny things to quackity?? feel free!! (if theyre not rp asks, i will respond as quackity unless otherwise stated!!)
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{ ♤ ♡ ◇ ♧ }
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{ General HC's }
- short king my beloved <3 (4'10 i have no self control)
- 22 years of age !! :D
- he has small wings on his back! he cannot fly due to silly problems in his childhood (angst?), but he tries to take pride in them! he also has little ones on his ears, and he does what he can to take care of them
- ^^ as these two imply, he is an avian hybrid!! tho ppl call him a joke since his wings are more of a golden color (like a ducks)
- when he gets surprised, he lets out a little quack ^_^ and also will trill like a bird when happy (bc hes an avian)
- quackity is dyslexic! but he does what he can to get past it. he has glasses that he only wears in private to help him read
- goes through depression spikes! he usually does what he can, and hypes himself up for the most part, but he does have some problems emotioanlly and mentally. he would rather die than make it somebody else's problem
- basically a dad to the entirety of las nevadas,, even treats foolish n sam as like, his kids (or more as ppl he takes care of)
- overworker!! mans barely sleeps and struggles to feel like hes done a good job
- to relax, quackity watches kids movies on his ipad and unironically likes cocomelon. (IM SORRY SNFNSBD)
- he also can and will throw a tantrum to get his way even when he can just be carried like a baby
- hides his smoking / nicotine addiction n everyone just pretends they dont know (they feel bad for him)
- sucker for the dumbass "best mom" / "#1 mom" shirts and just owns a ton that he sleeps / lounges in LMAO
- quackity id's as a trans guy! he has also had top surgery! he is on t (injections), and doesnt struggle too bad with dysphoria!
- will call you kid. unless he knows you and knows youre older, his first petname is kid.
- does not like talking ab karl, sapnap, or schlatt. like he'll answer maybe two questions before getting annoyed.
- along with that (unless in another au), schlatt/glatt, karl, and sapnap are all banned from las nevadas
- rubs the back of his neck if he's nervous. one of his tells
- speaking of his tells, his others are wringing his hands together, and placing his hands behind his back. rubbing his hands together happens when hes just trying to talk and getting nervous. and he puts his hands behind his back when he's feeling confident
- is a very good gambler, but when it comes to people he knows well?? hes a horrible liar. cannot lie to those he loves for shit.
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{ Appearence HC's }
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- mans always wears his dumb beanie
- messy black hair
- he switches between a red and white button up shirt!!! his sleeves are always rolled up though
- his hair is also a little longer than shoulder legnth!! sometimes its in a ponytail, but its normally just down and low.
- his hair looks greasy but its!! actually not, its soft and well-maintained
- he also has burn scars littered all over his body from what happened to slime. (he does not take care of them)
- he has a little. tail. that is the same color as the wings on his ears. although he does cover it unless hes around someone he likes/trusts <3
- it is right below his lower back <3 but he prefs it untouched (unless asked). its not made of feathers, but rather the softer part of feathers (idk how to explain it)
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{ ♤ ♡ ◇ ♧ }
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{ TK HC's }
- hes like a switch that leans to the lee side <3
- better with ppl he knows better
- can either b an asshole abt it or v playful (almost dad like coughs)
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{ ♤ ♡ ◇ ♧ }
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{ Ler HC's }
- again, he can b an asshole, but he can also b rlly playful, it depends on who u are
- will wait to go to ur worst spots so he can give a buildup
- mainly gets som1 for fucking with him, or getting them to just smile. or if theyre being an annoying little SHIT
- is GREAT at being a teasy asshole, he loves just fucking around
- he can also be really good at gentle tickles, he'll usually use that for a calm kind of situation, or when someones feeling down
- mans will fuck any1 up with raspberries
- is a petty little bitch and will wait to get revenge
- wont babytalk you but will talk like u arent there
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- finds it silly and cute and he likes it as a bonding activity
{ ♤ ♡ ◇ ♧ }
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- will talk himself up and then just absolutely die
{ Lee HC's }
- cant fucking stand teasing. at all. this man has a poker face of stone but the second you put your hands on him he cant do shit
- nervous giggler my beloved
- can and will throw a fit if you use his height against him, esp in teases
- unable to take it seriously, absolutely cannot stand any kind of teasing. it all just kills him
- arches his back a lot on instict. which doesnt help if someone wants to target his worst spot
- rubs his eyes when he's flustered
- tries to act big and strong even when down and giggly
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{ ♤ ♡ ◇ ♧ }
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[ Spot HC's ]
- thighs ; 6/10
- ribs ; 6/10
- palms ; 8/10 ; melt spot
- neck ; 8/10 ; melt spot
- lower sides / hips ; 9/10
- the little wing ears ; 11/10 ; he will die . .
- lower back!!!! ; 10/10 ; death spot , ,
- burn scars on his neck ; 10/10 ; fluster spot Augh
- his wings and shoulderblades ; 11/10 ; kill him ! !
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tears-of-boredom · 10 months
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why the fuck am i doing school. like. why are the adults making me do school. i literally have said so many times that i cant do that shit in my current mental state. and always they say shit like "yes, sucks that the mental health services of this city suck ass and you have to wait like half a year to get therapy. anyways go do school." like immmgkgkfkododkckgkfk. i cannot bring myself to say that i cant handle things, until im like, on the brink of a heart attack from the stress. you can't put the responsibility on me to inform an adult when im getting sick of this shit. especially cuz. if im feeling like shit, im more likely to not say shit about it. like literally just give a chance to plan out and communicate things when im feeling okay. but theres no need to do that because I'm doing so well hahahhhahhbwhjögmfmfmk.
i was willing to try. but im not ready for this shit. i can feel how literally every healthy habit i managed to develop deteriorates, because every little bit of freedom i have is spent trying to fucking relax myself enough to function. i dont want to brush my teeth, or shower, because if i do that, ill feel really disconnected from my body, and in this enviroment i cant afford feeling like that.
everything smells unfamiliar. literally only my own blood sweat and tears smell familiar. but even those are starting to warp. theres absolutely no sign of our cats. it feels like theyve died. it feels so wrong that they arent here. all the while this house reminds me of my grandparents', doubling the uncomfortable feel.
youre only allowed to eat at certain times. but I cant eat that much in one sitting. so im always hungry. because I cant just come back a bit later to eat more.
i cant be on my phone at all during meals, but im allowed to do sudokus with my left hand while i eat with my right. i dont get what the difference is.
for some reason the teens are allowed to do snuff tobacco inside. they arent hiding it at all, but for some reason the adults arent intefering with it. and I know its not really my business but, the adults arent doing much to help the smokers out of their nicotine addiction. like it feels very wrong. maybe give them some nicotine gum or something idk. do something to help the underage kids with their addiction.
i dont get any of this. I feel so stupid all the time because i dont understand how any of this is supposed to help me.
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chuuyansfwvent · 1 month
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I feel so tired of feeling this way. I dont want people to see how weak i am and then view me as weak. I dont want to burden people by being like this? Im trying to hide it as best as i can cause i dont know even how to confront it. I have no purpose in life really, my body is merely a vessel for the child i want to nurture and bring into this world one day. I take care of it so that i can be a father one day. I can be ugly and talentless and worthless but I can still be a father. I dont feel like a human being but I can protect my baby from the horrors ive lived that stole my own innocence. I want to be healthier physically so I can give birth to a healthy baby. My desire to be a parent overrides my thoughts of self harm and drug addiction. Ive been clean, im staying clean, and im recovering from my eating disorder as best as i can. Im eating every day and keeping it down every time now. Ive had brief thoughrs of like "yknow what if i just gave up and fucked off, bump a line and go stupid" but its immediately swatted away by "nah those days are over. I wanna get pregnant, have a quiet safe healthy lifestyle and set a good example for my future kid." And its gotten to the point where i take care of myself only because i see it as taking care of my future child. I treat my body like im preparing for it and everything. Im trying to put on weight so that my body can safely carry out a pregnancy. If it turns out that i physically cant have kids, idk what im gonna do. Im ready to move on to the next chapter in my life and start a family. I find a sense of healing in the fact that my baby wont have my wounds, that my baby is gonna get the love and compassion that i didnt, that despite what i went through im gonna be a good person for my baby to look up to and rely on. I have to be strong for my kid, one i havent had yet. It keeps me going. All of my passions? Id give them up in a heartbeat just to have a child. Hell, im choosing to put off any further transitioning specifically so i can have a child, i let like 200$ go to waste bc its non refundable, i wasnt sure if partner system ever wanted children with us. Im not going back on testosterone until ive had a baby. Im not gonna waste my money on myself, i want to buy things for my baby. I want to spend my days waking up to take care of my baby. I have ti eat, hydrate, keep up with my health to be able to have a child. And then i will have to keep doing it forever even after they are born, because i have to be healthy to be here for as long as possible to guide them through life.
So i stay clean, i stay safe, i eat, i keep it down, i dont even think about throwing up. I bought supplements, vitamins, gonna take care of these damn deficiencies, im gonna go to doctors finally, gonna quit nicotine, havent been drinking anymore, i dont even have the craving for alcohol. I have the craving for being a loving parent to my child. My sense of purpose, my future, it is for my baby. I will dedicate it to my baby. I am trying to hold on until i can have a child, and then i know i will be relieved to have finally achieved the first step in my purpose on this earth. I spent far too long beibg reckless and destroying myself for the sake of trying to escape, ive found a reason that requires i stay until my body dies of old age. Because i was raised by drug addicts, i was abused and felt abandoned. I will never, ever fucking be what my parents were to me towards my child. Never. I will never fucking touch drugs ever again. I will never even consider taking my own life and abandoning my baby on this earth. I am bringing a life into this world and i am not going to leave it to walk this earth without me if i can help it.
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mossdeep · 3 years
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vape is really going to become the smoking of this generation. huh. and in 20 years or so when kids ask "didn't you know it was bad for you?" people will say "we had no idea" even though like. we literally do know. same way my mom told me that they always knew cigs were bad and caused lung cancer but they didn't care bc it was cool to do, and then it became an addiction. i also can't wait to learn about the effects of vape second hand after so many people have vaped in my fucking face after i asked them to stop. they laughed and said it wasn't a big deal. and yet... my asthma would flare up every time.
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dididiof · 5 years
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mrdetectivedouche · 5 years
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Look. I recognize that drugs are unhealthy. But given the chance there are a handful of drugs that I would take if offered :/
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doseofhowell · 5 years
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Have you ever done drugs?
Ya lmao several times
Send your opinions on me/Ask me anything!💌
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dirtyfruit · 7 years
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one of my Struggle Days so i’ma do a lil thing
i don’t really like ... remember when i started quitting? but i know i was for sure done smoking in december of 2016 so let’s just say it was then
so i’ve been clean from smoking for 1 year and 3 months and 20-somethin days
go me
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hollyhomburg · 4 years
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Reasons Wretched and Divine (Pt. 7)
(Hybrid au) (YoonMinJoon x Reader) (Mafia au) 
Summary: After years of abuse, you’ve all finally found each other. But for one of you- the fear still lingers, hidden in the shadows. Yoongi doesn’t want much, just a few more weeks, but he only has until the end of the summer. 
Parings: Snake hybrid! Yoongi x Dog hybrid! Jimin x Dog hybrid! Namjoon x Pregnant! Reader, Platonic Vmin, allusions to 2seok, 
Genre: Hybrid au, Polyamory au, Hurt/Comfort, Recovery, Pregnancy, Mafia au
Tags:  Domestic abuse, references to sexual abuse- and choosing to have sex even though you’ve been through sa, physical abuse, polyamory negotiations, Post-traumatic stress disorder, mute characters, brief gore at the end, pregnant m/c, frottage, marking kink, fingering, oral f. receiving, Voyeurism, exhibitionism, implied death but dont worry I do not write MCD!!!!
A/n: just for posterity's sake! i was drunk when i posted this! enjoy! full gangbang comes in (y/n) next chapter! (oh god im going to hell).
W/c: 10.5k
Song Rec: Like Real People do ~ Hozier
~ Series Masterlist ~
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2 Years Earlier
-  If Jeon Jungkook where so esoterically inclined, he would write a book on how he had become the most dangerous man in the underworld. It would be a short book though; because Jungkook had only 2 rules for himself. The first was to always get up after he’d been hit during a fight (even if it took him a second) and the second was to know when to mind his own business. 
- Jungkook was always able to get up after being hit, Even when he’d been a street kid, with not a penny to his name and a whole lot of anger in his mouth. ready to spit vitriol at anyone who would pause and listen. He’d always been able to get up. The pain giving him a kind of sick clarity that he eventually sought out instead of tried to escape. Jungkook could never think as clearly as he did during a fight; or when he was in pain. And that was probably because of his father. 
- But whatever. That man was 6 feet under, (his mother on the other hand- no- that bitch certainly had more than one dept to pay still). He didn’t have a lot of time or energy to put into dealing with that particular trauma (why he honestly felt like sometimes- he liked being hit). Most of his energy went into staying alive. Even now- when living and surviving teetered on the same edge. Jungkook had more pressing matters to tend to than dealing with his own fragile mind. 
- The way he would get up and hop around for a second to soak in the clarity after being hit during a scuffle was one of the reasons why he’d been given his street name: The Playboy Bunny; further set in stone with his tattoo of the same moniker under his left eye. A cheekbone he’d tap and say “you want to hit me? why don’t you try your luck and see how well it turns out for you.” 
- He was doing reconnaissance, Sneaking around the back alley with his hood up and his glasses on- disguising his black eye that was sure to get more than a few looks from passers-by. The ears of the playboy bunny tattoo peeking out over the top of his mask. 
- He keeps his eyes on the crowd waiting for some sort of handoff- to see anything at all. But he’d lost his target through the crowd and has no drive to find them in the dizzying rush of people and umbrellas. Not yet. Not when the hum of addiction lurks in his veins. 
- Jungkook pauses lighting a cigarette, when a commotion to the side hidden around a corner- blurs his concentration. The world snapping back into focus when he sinks his fingernails into his palm. Terse voices. A couple fighting in the alleyway perpendicular to his. 
- Minding his own business was a particular skill of his- it took one kind of person to know when to step in, and another to know which problems weren't worth the headache. And unless it involved the acquisition money or some step therein, it wasn’t a problem worth getting into in Jungkook’s opinion.
- But Jungkook can’t stop his ears from hearing snippets of conversation, a low and angry male voice. The sound of a smack. “You just had to embarrass me like that, didn’t you? First, you come out dressed like a slob and then you act like a fucking whore- I swear if I see you give eyes to another man this week I'll beat you five ways to Sunday”
- The sound of a soft female voice, so quiet- almost indistinguishable from the pouring rain, “I wasn’t-” another smack.
- Jungkook has been hit so many times he knows the sound of it, the ragged gasp the woman lets out, also quite- like even the pain takes up too much space. 
- His body starts to move before his mind thinks it through as he gives up position in favor of investigating the noise. There he sees it, ivy growing up the wall next to the back exit of some restaurant. A woman, small crouching in front of a grotesque man. A baggy coat buttoned tight around her small form. hair swept back in a tight bun. Red lipstick smudged. Though you check your hands and think its blood for a moment before you remember you’re wearing it. 
- Jungkook waits for a moment before he watches you stand on shaky legs. you get up. 
- The rest of the underworld might be old grudges and blood feuds but Jungkook was only here to be a businessman. He didn’t have time for ego and arrogance, let alone time for altruism... 
- Usually. 
- He looks on for a moment, too sluggish without nicotine, but Jungkook’s lingering stare almost seems to spur the man on. He’s wearing a jacket with a military patch, a badge; some sort of congratulation for service done no doubt. and Jungkook feels his distaste for the man deepen. 
- “What you looking at punk?” he slurs. Stalking forward as if to shove Jungkook. He almost wants to tut- that would be an expensive action. Jungkook wonders if the man is maybe high or drunk or both. He’s has had his fair share of experience with junkies and he knows one when he sees one. 
- “Nothing, just a pig beating his girlfriend.” The man settles for shoving Jungkook back. And Jungkook lets him. You don’t look up, don’t do anything but lean to the side, like the brick wall is the only thing keeping you up. Jungkook sees the back of your hand, black and blue, the other bruises on your neck. You only make eye contact with him once. Just slightly. Barely in passing.  
- You look like Jungkook used to look. He remembers in the savage bite of an open-handed slap- the fear he sees in your eyes. He looks and looks. And it aches so viscerally as Jungkook watches you go, your hurt echoes through him. You look beaten down and broken like Jungkook used too; before he’d decided he was done taking punches from people who were supposed to love him- Were supposed to care. 
- (Before he realized life wasn't supposed to hurt) 
- He’s never been one to feel things for other people, the empathy sparing him through most of the suffering he’s seen. It’s not that he’s unfeeling; it’s just that Jungkook’s life has forced him to feel concerned only for himself and no one else. His own survival is his first priority; Not others. 
- He watches you walk away, And you don’t look back at him. Rushing to keep up with your husband's steps. He waits until you disappear into the crowd before he lifts his phone to his ear and makes a call. “Hey, I need you to flag all of the cars that leave the parking lot, they’re just a couple, should be coming to you soon.”
- Jeon Jungkook had become the most powerful man in the underworld because of two reasons; by being able to take punches, and by knowing when to mind his own business. 
- But For this, Jungkook thinks he can make an exception.
- (You won't remember meeting Jeon Jungkook, but Jungkook will always remember you).
~.~
Now
-It comes as no surprise that your little speech fades after a few days and the rest of the hybrids quick to return to treating Yoongi with a mix of disdain and fear. Though mostly- this seems to be caused by Minhyung's group and the other canine hybrids. Namjoon hears them whispering about ‘favoritism’ before they catch on that he’s listening in. And in the days following your impromptu departure from the farm, you find people quiet even further whenever Yoongi's brought up. Staring when Yoongi comes close, afraid to interact with him.
- Even Jimin is greeted mostly with silence from all but a few. The bunny hybrids don’t act so skittish anymore, and the cat hybrids could care less used to sticking to their own group. Taehyung seems to have encouraged the other bear hybrids to make an actual effort and they at least say hello now. It’s better than the derisive comments of the dog hybrids, or the snooty noses stuck high in the air of the dear hybrids and other exotic breeds. 
- They know Jimin is close to Yoongi and Namjoon, and now he feels even more like an outsider that before (somehow it doesn't matter as much as before). The only ones who don’t act overtly different are the new hybrids; Hoseok and the small lion hybrid. but They were never around to learn how to hate Yoongi in the first place.
- it's a little cute- the way that Hoseok will always shout Yoongi's name in greeting (though you're unsure if that's just his personality now that he's started to grow into himself). Hoseok is unbothered by Yoongi's reaction; to shy away from anything that will draw more attention to himself. But Hoseok's smile is so bright and elastic that even he has a hard time ignoring the otter hybrid. You hope there will be a friendship there eventually, that yoongi will open up to more than just your group. 
- The little lion kit is a new addition too, she's not the only young feline hybrid you have at the farm but she is the friendliest. She gets pretty close to the other cats that work in the kitchen almost instantly. Probably on account of her young age (she's barely 7) and the eldest cat hybrid seems to be particularly fond of the little one.
- She's curious and kind to Yoongi too- excitedly running up to him more than once to show him a little rock or some flower she found- and yoongi will marvel and nod, and if Jimin is near- he'll lean close and tell her how pretty it is. 
- She doesn't seem at all deterred by Yoongi's lack of voice. one day she even sees Jimin, her ears perking up excitedly, tail swishing. "Hello Yoonies voice!" it's a little cute- even if it does make yoongi splutter a little. But she's not exactly wrong; Jimin does talk for yoongi more these days. 
- She Always comes bounding up to you and giggling happily to be picked up. Her little legs stretching around your waist, small bottom sat atop your baby bump. Making you get the kind of look that makes Namjoon, Yoongi, and Jimin sigh and look impossibly fond. They can only imagine what you’re going to be like once your little one is born. Your due date is barely 2 months away.
- In truth- you’re starting to get a little bit big. You say it one morning with Namjoon. After he asks you why you’re looking into the mirror with such a displeased expression. The sound of your terse voices alerts Yoongi and he comes to the door to your bedroom to witness your spat. Making a flippant hand movement at Namjoon to back off. Namjoon could smell your distress on you when you looked in the mirror, his voice tense but breaking. “Baby just tell me, why you think you’re not beautiful like that? let me understand. Cuz to me- you look more irresistible every day.”
- It’s not that you exactly wanted him to agree with you that you were nearing the size of a whale- but this doesn’t help at all either. His unending insistence- doesn’t he see? when he looks in the mirror doesn’t he see what you do? His instance that everything is alright doesn't help when you’re feeling this self-conscious.
- Yoongi helps you, fiddling with Namjoon’s closet for a second before he pulls out an extra-large white shirt of his and helps you into it- tying it loosely over your baby bump so that it flatters your waist a little more. The attention that Yoongi shows you clearly making you flustered. Then he drags you to the mirror, tugging your hair out of its bun, the tension going out of your shoulders.
- Yoongi doesn’t know it, but Namjoon does. Your late husband used to always be so particular about your hair, yanking on it harshly if it was left down. and An easy way to avoid him yanking on it was to leave it up. And sometimes you still pull it up convinced it’s safer even though he’s dead and gone. It’s scary how simple it is- but the second your hair comes down your whole body relaxes.
- All the while Namjoon watches from your bed. And you take in yourself, the baby hairs free-floating against your forehead; Yoongi curls one gently around his finger and then lets it go. You take in the way that the fabric hangs now, making you look a little more proportional, Yoongi gives you a satisfied smile behind your back and you have to sigh and admit it. “Okay- okay- I’ll give you this- I’m not a whale”
- “And even if you where you’d be a pretty whale.” Yoongi has the good sense to hurl a pillow in Namjoon’s direction, but it makes you laugh all the same- the heaviness in your chest abated a little. Your sleeve brushing Yoongi’s as you head downstairs, Namjoon trailing behind.
- The beach trip was a nice distraction from chores but the real work comes crashing down on them the next few days. Your little group feels closer than ever, you rarely part from any of them for long and their intention, their little acts of care never fail to make you feel flustered and taken care of.
- Jimin always holds out a hand for you to take when you’re stepping over uneven ground, Yoongi makes a startled noise whenever you so much as get close to a hose that might trip you, always gesturing for you to pause and take a break whenever you’re working in the garden. Namjoon too, always running back and forth from whatever project he’s working on to check on you and make sure you have water or food.
- At night, Namjoon takes your stretch mark cream from you, rubbing down your baby bump and your hips, the little lines of lighter skin on your waist get little kisses from him.  
- Even if you want just a snack, Namjoon and Yoongi will bring you a full meal- convinced that you need to be eating more than you are. At dinner Yoongi fills up your plate- piling it high with more food then you could fit in your already crowded tummy. And he always eyes you suspiciously when you can’t finish the full plate. Namjoon too will level you with a look- asking if you really are full. 
- Since your pregnancy has progressed, you’ve become a little moodier, and a little hornier whenever way the wind blows. And Namjoon doesn’t help that much at all- and by that you mean, he makes it worse. When he comes out of the field with his shirt off and tucked into his shorts all of his thickness, his muscles that make you ravenous. 
- During lunch one day he drags you away to a forgotten tool shed, though it would be easier just to go up the hill to your bedroom- you feel like teenagers sneaking around like this. 
- Namjoon presses into you as he hits the latch on the door, muffling your giggles with kisses as you hide from the hybrids outside, voices that you can dimly hear, unable to pick out any one particular yet- but you know they're there. 
- You and Namjoon might bicker like an old married couple. But you also act like teenagers gooey and giggly and so so so in love. “Do you think that they can hear you like this? Or smell you, my love?” Namjoon is always quick to tell you how delectable you smell when you’re horny. His more sensitive nose-picking it up the second you feel a slickening between your thighs.
- You’re shaky when you respond. “I don’t know, maybe?” Namjoon always has this passionate intense air about him. He’s slightly possessive- but you’d never fault him for that not when it’s all about protecting and providing for you. Not when he always puts your pleasure first (you feel like you may have turned into a slight pillow princess with him). 
- Namjoon heaves you up onto the edge of a bench and then gets on his knees. Gently lifting your leg over his shoulder. He’s always mindful of how much you can move in your swollen state. He checks to make sure he’s not bending your hips in an uncomfortable way. 
- You put your hands back on the dusty bench to stabilize yourself as you lie back, Namjoon wastes no time in pressing his face close to your cunt and inhaling, His nose prodding at the thin fabric of your underwear. One of his ears caught on the hem of your dress. His fingers digging into the plushness of your thighs- so full and healthy it makes him hard in his pants. 
- He’s slow with the appreciation of your thighs and hips. Hands gripping and moving on to touch and feel like you have all the time in the world. But you hear voices outside the tool shed you’ve commandeered and you could just slip out and go back up to your house- but somehow you like this better. The thought of being discovered stirring an unsure heat in your stomach. 
- You can hear Taehyung's voice, and then- like a shock through your core- you hear Jimin’s. Namjoon can feel your jolt. And you realize- his sensitive ears must have known who it was before your own human ones did. He chuckles- teasing his fingers along the hem of your underwear, almost daring to slip inside.
- You almost whine when you think about what you’re being denied- the harsh pull of his fingers that you’re so addicted too, how thick his fingers and knuckles feel (almost as nice as his cock) when they pull out and push in.
- Yoongi and Namjoon have always had the most lovely hands, it’s strange that when Namjoon touches you- you think about Yoongi’s hands. The way you clench around his fingers at that has Namjoon’s tail wagging. "you're thinking about them aren't you," The way you clench around his fingers at that has Namjoon’s tail wagging. Because yeah; Yoongi and Jimin are apart of Namjoon’s pack too, and bonding and group sex are kind of the same thing to hybrids. You’d found that out the hard way when you’d found a group of cat hybrids all tangled together in the grass the other day.
- Namjoon is always so gentle with you because of your condition, but you find your hips jerking with want. His fingers still when he feels the way your wetness has spilled out the sides. His thumb pressed over your clit teasingly. “smell so good when you're like this So wet my love, are you thinking about them finding you like this?” 
- “Y-yes” you confess, and Namjoon growls, nipping at you through the fabric, the feel of his teeth brushing you, over the sensitive skin. The fabric cushioning the feeling, makes you almost gush, and you know you’ll be shakily legged by the time he lets you get down. And that he won’t let you get away from him until he’s taken care of you in this way, sated you in every sense of the word. 
- But he can also tell how shy you are, the heat under your skin at the thought of being discovered. always unsure how much of your dirty talk is a real want and not just something you like in theory. Namjoon knows the idea of sharing you with the others might seem like the most natural and hottest thing; to love you alongside them. but to you- a human, hybrid sex and hybrid bedroom dynamics aren't as given. 
- So he leans close, sliding your underwear down your legs slowly, letting you feel the heat of his palms on your skin. You're getting worked up a little too quickly, your heaving breaths needy. God damn pregnancy hormones you'd say if you could think beyond the plush feeling of his lips pressing a kiss to your clit. “Gotta clean you up for them, if they smelled you like this- then they’d know wouldn’t they?” 
- You prove Namjoons initial assumption wrong. “What if I-” you whisper- gasping quietly as Namjoon drags the fabric to the side and glides a delicate lick over your folds. “What if I want them to know?” the pleasure thrumming through your body as Namjoon licks up your slit. Namjoon stills, ears perked, eyes flashing in the half-light. The snarl against your cunt loud and echoic.
- The voices outside fall silent and Namjoon doesn't stop his ravenous licking no matter if you have to bite your lip to keep your noises in. One of your hands scrambling to pull at his hair and find something to grip onto and anchor yourself against the onslaught of pleasure. Jimin is the first one to puncture the silence, “What was that?” 
- Then comes Seokjin's voice “all of you- move along- whoever it is they probably don’t want the three of you listening in like a bunch of horn dogs” which is basically a confirmation that they were listening in, and that Yoongi was there too. 
- When you finally exit the toolshed with weak legs, sure you’re going to have to at least got change your underwear. You find a bleary-eyed Seokjin a few dozen feet away, obviously upwind of the toolshed. he levels Namjoon with a tired expression. “You both have dirt on your knees” Namjoon has the good sense to look shy at that. You hastily brush off the spots on his, and he on yours.
- If Jimin and Yoongi smell anything on you later- they don’t say anything and the idea that they might make you feel hot all over whenever they lean in too close. You think you see a blush on Yoongi’s face more than once, and maybe see him adjust his pants out of the corner of your eye, but Jimin seems blissfully unaware.
- You have a check-up at the doctor’s office in the coming days. And although only Namjoon is allowed in the room with you (they have a two-person maximum because the ultrasound room is tiny), Yoongi and Jimin also accompany you. Namjoon comes bounding out after, waving the picture and smiling so so wide, both Yoongi and jimin leaning in close to get a better look- they’re so enamored with the little photo. And when you get home- Namjoon shows anyone that asks how the check-up went, eventually hanging it on one of the two fridges in the kitchen.
- Jimin is the only one who seems to notice the jealous looks- because you went out for ice-cream after and come home with them still partially melting (you’d had another craving- french-fries dunked in ice cream of all things). One of the other hybrids having heard Jimin talk to Tae about the beach trip too. They come to you at the end of the day, 2 bunnies, a cat, a fox and one of the bears- a mish moshed group of hybrids; petitioning you to start the beach trips for everyone.
- You can only fit so many people into the back of your truck so you pick a day and start a raffle for spots. Jimin throws his name into the hat just in case but to his surprise, Yoongi doesn’t. No matter how much Jimin bugs him too; He won’t agree to accompany Jimin to the beach again. Shaking his head with a roll of his eyes back tipped back against the grass, his sunhat crumpled. Offering up a few sweet tomatoes to soothe Jimin’s sour nerves. 
- The peace lasts for a couple of days before they’re right back to treating Yoongi like shit and for some reason, it pisses Jimin off more. No matter how many times he’s heard Namjoon asks Yoongi to please tell him when anything happens. The snake hybrid seems unable to fight back.
- Jimin asks one of the hybrids why she won’t look at Yoongi (after the snake has already gone up the hill to retrieve another dish for dinner) and beyond a startled look, she just says “none of us can smell him” she throws a stack of paper towels down onto the table angrily. The deer hybrid across from them stumbling with their silver wear But she doesn’t need to re-iterate herself. Jimin understands- it’s hard to trust someone who can lie to your face- and in the world of hybrids where emotions can be decreed from a simple sniff, Jimin can’t say he doesn’t see where they’re coming from.
- Doesn’t excuse their behavior, however. After all- Jimin can smell Yoongi’s emotions through his scent and he didn't realize that was something strange until now. To Jimin, Yoongi’s scent is soft and sweet- something gummy and soft like a marshmallow. But that’s probably because he spends so much time with the hybrid. The others only spend so much time around him and are unused to his scent. And the fact that he never talks and never tries to socialize doesn’t help.
- Jimin can’t imagine not wanting to smell more of it- not leaning in whenever the other hybrid passes. Jimin wants to bury his face in Yoongi’s neck and rub his cheek all over it. The same way that Namjoon does to him in the morning if he shows up before he’s changed from his pajamas. And he knows he smells soft like sleep- an alluring smell to the older alpha when he comes down the stairs, ears straight up eyes wide as he takes in all of Jimin's vulnerability.
- and it might have to do with what Taehyung had said- that alphas eat up that sort of thing. 
- Namjoon smells good too, his scent all soft mornings and sleepy walks, the older hybrid large and so pliant in his sleepiness, eyes swollen and face puffy as he hides in Jimin’s shoulder. Sending his pine scent all over so that it sticks to jimin no matter where he is. So that jimin will smell like Namjoon all day. 
- One of the cat hybrids at the sink rolls her eyes. But when you come down the stairs smelling much the same. You touch his arm so softly in passing, like you can’t believe you’re allowed. And Jimin’s senses are a dizzying blur of cream, peaches, pine, and marshmallow. 
- when he goes back to the barns, hazy at being scented by Namjoon so thoroughly. Taehyung levels him with a funny look and a chuckle. "you're more devious than anyone gives you credit for" thought Taehyung means it good-naturedly- it's good to have a friend to ask how to go about flirting with. the other hybrids gathered on the couch in front of the tv; some cartoon playing- pretend like they're not listening in. 
- "How do you know so much when you don't have a pack of your own Tae?" he asks over breakfast, the two of them clutching breakfast burritos on their way to check Tae's bees. Tae doesn't meet Jimin's eyes "you're just lucky- most hybrids dont find a pack so easily Jimin" his words aren’t jealous- only a little patronizing. And Jimin accepts it because he knows he has a lot to learn.
- Taehyung is right- out of all of the hybrids at the farm, there are only a few who have paired up or even made stronger groups or multi-person packs. the bunnies and the cats don't form set generally- though there are a few pairs and more than a few throuples.
- Jimin as caught Yeonjun making out with a tabby more than once- has learned to avoid certain sections of the woods all together because everyone knows that's where the bunny hybrids like to go in the afternoons. The canine hybrids are the only ones who have packs, though there are more than half a dozen loners like jimin and namjoon.
- It's hard for Jimin to cohabitate with them even though there are other larger predators and more than a few prey hybrids living in Jimin's barn. he hadn’t really realized until taehyung pointed it out that each different pack occupied one corner of the punk room. More than once- the room in the barns has felt hostile if only for the packs that have claimed either corner of the bunkroom. it's usual to wake up and find more than one of the pups cuddling with another in one single bed. 
- Having reciprocated love in his pack shouldn't feel like an impossibility to Jimin. But still, when Yoongi steps close- an inch too far away, his fingertips barely brushing- Jimin just- yearns. It’s a soft sort of yearning, the kind that has jimin jumping up whenever Yoongi needs something. Has him settling a think knit blanket over Yoongi’s nobly knees during movie nights, and sticking his own feet underneath the edge of the blanket. Feet Pressed to the clothed line of his calf. Maybe nothing will ever come of it, But Jimin yearns with everything he’s got regardless.
- In the late hours of the night, when Jimin lies awake thinking about the three of you. An instinct welling inside of him that says he should walk up the hill and fall asleep on your couch just to be closer to you three (the pack instinct- Taehyung calls it, looking a little bit sad himself when jimin asks him, the other hybrid moving away before jimin can ask exactly what that means) Jimin wonders if his feelings will ever be reciprocated.
- But love is a strange thing, it’s not just about saying it with kisses or touches- though Jimin wants them too. There is love in the small things, in building something together so that’s what Jimin tries to do. Every day- he takes to gardening with a new vigor. Shouting in joy when you harvest some of the tomatoes- filling up a whole gallon bucket with the amount that have ripened over the last week. Your peppers and cucumbers are beginning to produce more too.
- Jimin and Yoongi run to Namjoon just to give him a handful. The alpha gives each of them a sweet nuzzle in thanks, even if Yoongi chirps and moves back after a moment. A flush high on his cheek. Namjoon looking up at Yoongi from where he’s stopped- cheek on the elder's shoulder. The snake relaxing after a moment. 
- You spend the rest of the day showing Jimin and Yoongi how to prepare the tomatoes to make a sauce, roasting them on low heat. Cutting garlic so so carefully, and whenever Jimin looks across the prep table- Yoongi’s gaze darts away. halfway through- yoongi stoops down, sticking his socked feet into jimin’s lap, and it feels so nice, to have their weight there. 
- You go over to Yoongi at one point, and he tips his head back to look up at you. The back of his head is at the right height to lye up against your baby bump. And Jimin watches, as you slowly, so slowly, brush the hair out of his eyes and away from his forehead. Yoongi’s eyes flutter closed and he tips his face into your hand. Letting out a low happy grumble when you take his action as positive reinforcement, and drag your nails over his scalp. In Jimin’s lap, Yoongi’s toes curl. 
- It feels strange- and Jimin can’t quite put his finger on it- but it almost feels like Yoongi is letting you all touch him more than ever. Suddenly okay with touches- as long as it’s in a more private setting. Jimin can’t say he’s unhappy about it. Maybe one-day yoongi will even let Jimin scent mark him. 
- Jimin smiles at Yoongi’s happy little snake grumbles. And keeps chopping his garlic. Is happy to receive the same kind of scratch from you a few minutes later. Though he might abandon his chopping in favor of rubbing his face all over your stomach when the instinct strikes him. Jimin unintentionally lets out a growl when you start to move away. Slapping a hand over his mouth and apologizing, no matter how you and Yoongi laugh.
- Still, despite the happiness, you have in your kitchen, in your house, whenever you’re around each other. The rest of the world is not so kind.
- An adoption day comes at arguably the worst and best time. There is still a fair amount of friction between your group and the rest of the hybrids. And a few outsiders at the farm only make it worse. Though Yoongi, Jimin, and Namjoon aren’t the only hybrids who wear red stickers to indicate that they are not available for adoption.
- Hoseok surprisingly- grabs a yellow sticker. And the three of your hybrids watch- as Seokjin hovers around him- a red sticker on his own lapel- wary of all and anyone who interacts with the otter hybrid. His glares putting off all but the most attentive patrons. That's where it starts.
- Jimin is unfortunately caught in the middle when seokjin confronts hoseok. off to help the three of them bring down 3 trays of cut watermelon for the hybrids and the patrons. The dinner tables have been set out on the side of the field piled high with Hors d'oeuvre. You’re there with Namjoon greeting the humans. Games are set out too- for the hybrids and humans to play. 
- it’s no secret that they’ve gotten close, and jimin had assumed they’d talked about it- but apparently not. Seokjin is so angry he’s nearly crying. “why- hoseok- why do you want to leave the farm?” Hoseok’s little otter ears are tight against his scalp. “I just- I didn’t want to assume?”
- “Oh- so you’d rather just- throw away everything that we’re trying- all of this- you don’t you dont want to stay do you-” Jimin has never seen seokjin looking so lost, and he knows enough to guess that Seokjin’s anger is at least in part to due to some trauma (later- Jimin will find out that Seokjin’s mother left him with his last owner- an abusive man- to save herself).  
- Jimin knows enough to get in between them, telling them to calm down and spend a minute away from each other. Jimin ends up with Hoseok- “it’s hard Jimin- how do you, how do you have so much sureness with Y/n? with Namjoon and yoongi too? How do you look at them and trust that you should stay?” Hoseok's eyes remain on Jimin's red tag. 
- Jimin sighs, thinking it through, “do you look at Seokjin and know he cares about you? like- do you know it in your bones?” Hoseok bites his lower lip, “yes- but-” 
- “Then you should stay Hoseok,” Jimin walks Hoseok up to the main house where the stickers sit on the prep table. Changing out his yellow one for a red one. And when they head off back down the hill, Seokjin is waiting on the path with Yoongi, apologizing and dragging Hoseok away to the barns where Seokjin’s own private room is. Hoseok goes willingly, smiling up at the older hybrid. His narrow shoulders cuddled under one of Seokjin's wide ones. 
- jimin has to admit, an otter and an alpaca are a weird combination for a hybrid pack (But no stranger than a pair of puppies and a snake). His thoughts drift towards Taehyung- and Jimin hopes that his friend won't end up alone. it must not be easy- to see all of you pair off like this. 
- in some ways, that adoption day is full of just as much bullshit as they usually are. there are always people who dont understand the effort it takes to take care of a hybrid- they aren't just like any ordinary pet. it's easy to spot the ones that view them as pets- and less like people. You get a few rich people looking to adopt a companion as always. 
- A substantial group of families also look to adopt similarly aged companions for their single children. And you agree to more than one possible test weekend. You’re always so particular about letting the children go, so wary and so careful in the way you let them interact with the families.
- Though they don’t have parents here- there are more than a few good role models and parental figures. More than one child chooses a red tag for themselves. And they always know have a right to it- no matter how young they are. You make it clear to the group of them; If they don’t want to be adopted they don’t have to be. 
- You even get one couple- the woman withdrawn and sad, and a slightly jealous look at your own pregnant stomach says more than any words could. It’s pretty common for women who can’t have children to adopt hybrid children. and though some of it doesn't sit right with you, You aren’t one to judge. 
- Jimin spends most of the adoption day helping you balance the need for food and for games. running back and forth to the house to help. Though there is a little work that needs to be done here and there just to keep the farm running as usual. grey storm clouds roll in halfway through the day, puncturing the blue sky- foretelling scattered showers and storms. and jimin hopes it will cut the adoption day short so that you can return to your routines. 
- Jimin is just helping Yoongi putting away a broken badminton net When it happens- Jimin isn’t certain why it does. Only that he hears the words outside the shed after Yoongi's just excited to grab the broken rackets (Namjoon isn't the only clumsy hybrid you have at the farm). 
- “oh sorry- ew gross,” a shrill female voice says, and then he rounds the corner and sees yoongi picking himself up from the dirt- a rich lady and her peacock hybrid looking down at him like he’s the dirt beneath his shoes. The peacock hybrid has Yoongi’s sun hat in his hands and there is another hybrid- a wolf hybrid from the farm with a green sticker on his shirt, who growls down at yoongi.
- His shoulders shake too the way they do when he’s been touched and he doesn’t want to be. Jimin has seen you brush your fingers over the back of Yoongi’s hand, has even felt the coolness of the snake hybrid through the fabric when the elder grabbed his sleeve. Has touched him even more intimately as of late. But he knows that Yoongi can’t tolerate being touched by people he doesn’t trust- doesn’t want to touch him. basically, anyone, that's, not you, Namjoon, or Jimin himself. 
- “Hey- what the fuck!” Jimin spits, grabbing the sunhat out of the hybrid's hand with a growl, his ears flat against his head. If Jimin had elongated canines like Namjoon they would be barred in anger as he shoves the larger hybrid back. Yoongi shrinks impossibly smaller behind him.
- Jimin is hot and itchy from the heat and the humidity, and he really just wants to shower and cool off. He doesn’t have the energy to deal with entitled people today. And more importantly- no one touches Yoongi on Jimin’s watch.
- The hybrid looks surprised to be talked to in that way, he’s nearly a head taller than Jimin let alone the slightly taller feathers that poke out of the top of his head that give him the appearance of several more inches- but Jimin’s intimidating enough with his set expression to send the hybrid huffing away. Feathers fluffed.
- The peacock's iridescent feathers stand up on end as he grabs the hand of his human owner, her diamond tennis bracelet glittering in the sunlight. “This was getting boring anyway. Sorry” he tosses over his shoulder at the canine hybrid, who looks so disappointed his ears pinned back against his head. They only give him that- barely a look, before they’re heading off down the hill in the direction of the line of cars parked on the grass.
- The wolf hybrid deflates audibly- watching the woman and the other hybrid disappear down the hill. promises of home and family disappearing in a moment, but Jimin has to think- if they’d be discouraged so easily- were they really worth it? The wolf hybrid doesn't seem to think so- Turning his angry tear-filled eyes on Jimin. 
- But Jimin can see the hate in his eyes and knows not to mistake the tears for only sadness. “You both ruin everything” he growls out- before they too run back towards the barns- no doubt to tell the others how Yoongi had sabotaged their adoption. Even though that was far from the truth. in all honestly- yoongi just bumped into the lady- or more probably- the lady bumped into him when he was on his way out of the shed.
- Jimin holds out his sunhat to Yoongi, who takes it from Jimin carefully, Jimin doesn’t linger on the fact that his hand still shakes. Jimin’s hand lingers somewhere close enough where Yoongi could touch it could reach out if he wants too. If he wants to get that kind of comfort from Jimin's touch- then Jimin will willingly give it. 
- a faint flush coats the elder's cheeks. Oh no- he must be overheating then, Jimin feels a rush of concern. He knows what you would do, hover your hand close enough to Yoongi’s forehead, usher him upstairs for a break in the air conditioning, and a glass of icy lemonade.
- All they can hear is the shouts of laughter at the games the others play in the fields, “I understand why you don’t want to stay in the barns, why you don’t want to socialize with some of them, they’re so unkind to you it makes me crazy.” Jimin shakes his head, sour anger filling him like a rotten peach.
- Yoongi, looks more than pacified, looking up at Jimin with an indecipherable look. Most of the time, Jimin can get a good guess on how he’s feeling but not now- not that indecipherable heaviness he finds there. or the strangely heavy marshmallow scent that’s fluffed around them. Jimin lets go of Yoongi’s hat.
- After a moment Yoongi nods, and Jimin takes it as a thank you. They’re done for the day and dinner won’t be for another few hours or so. Jimin is ready to avoid some of the strangers and hopefully take advantage of the empty showers. The sky is grey with incumbent storm clouds when Jimin makes his way to the shower buildings which he finds blissfully empty; except for the bear hybrid Jackson that tosses a greeting at Jimin before exiting.
- Jimin doesn’t even bother to flick the lights on, instead of settling for the calm light that comes through the skylights, grey and hazy. the storm clouds have started to roll in properly. He hums as he disrobes, goes to grab his favorite strawberry body wash, and picks the last shower at the end, disrobing in relative comfort, glad for a moment of privacy.
- The blissfully Coldwater does wonders for his overheating muscles, relaxing his body deliciously from a day spent walking up and down the hill. he digests the chaos of the day- seokjin and hoseok fighting, yoongi getting shoved. you'd looked frazzled the last time he'd seen you, smile strained as you made small talk with most of the humans, Namjoon always close incase you needed someone to lean on.
-  Jimin had been able to tell that your feet were sore just by looking at you. Namjoon will probably make you sit down before long, maybe he already has. You’ll probably cut off the adoption day because of the rain. Taking down names and information before you send them on their way. You rarely let a hybrid leave the farm after one adoption day, needing to have more private meetings and house calls to willingly part with one of them. You just want to make sure you dont release them back into another abusive household. 
- He hums as he washes, lingering in the water and taking a longer shower than he usually would. He hums, testing the way his vocal cords wrap around the acoustics of the empty high ceilinged room. 
Then he hears the scuffling of someone in the bathroom too and cuts off. A little abashed at being caught. The rustling getting closer and its a moment before he realizes that the rustling is coming from his own section of the bath. he smells him the second before he pulls the shower curtain gets pulled back. 
- “Yoongi!” Jimin shouts, furiously grabbing at something to cover his nakedness. Jimin furiously tries to cover his crotch, grabbing one of the large bargain bottles of shampoo and hold it there even as cold water runs over his face. Getting into his wide eyes. “Yoongi what the fuck! You’re naked!”
- Jimin is glad that the rumors about snake hybrids having double the appendages as a normal hybrid are false but he can’t stop his blush or his wandering eyes as he sees the snake hybrid in full. Or the hot lick of arousal that shocks him through his core- especially when he recognizes the heaviness to Yoongi's scent as being arousal. 
- there is a single moment, jimin can smell yoongi- can see the want in his eyes, can feel his own scent fluff out to meet his, yoongi sags under the weight of Jimin's scent as the surprise dissipates. "do you-" Jimin's face must be brighter than a tomato. He reaches out a tentative hand, "do you want to-" 
- Before Jimin can do much more than that Yoongi’s lips are on his, tentative but firm and passionate, the fire leaking into him from Yoongi as jimin stumbles in surprise. The kiss tastes like thank you and Ive wanted to do this for longer than i care to admit and everything yoongi can't say, can't let slip past his lips. jimin drops the shampoo bottle which narrowly misses his foot as Yoongi’s hands come up to encircle his jaw so softly like Yoongi is holding the most important thing in his world. Jimin is so shocked that for a moment- he doesn’t kiss back and Yoongi retracts- not before Jimin chases his lips and the snake hybrid returns to him.
- It’s the first time Yoongi’s ever touched Jimin so bare, and the snake’s hands on the back of his neck feel cold and shivery but good. As Jimin’s back hit’s the wall and their fronts press together for a moment, just brushing. Then colliding with more force as they both realize how good it feels to be so close to someone you trust. It’s dizzying- intoxicating, and Jimin knows his mouth is moving sloppily even if he wants to kiss Yoongi with just as much intent. 
- The snake hybrid bites- actually bites- down on Jimin’s tongue. And a strangled whine comes to live and die in his throat. A snarl in his ears from Yoongi's mouth as the snake hybrid keeps his biting, moves to Jimin's throat- bites hard Enough that Jimin knows he'll leave a bruise. "leave more- yoongi please mark me" jimin feels hot with the thought of it- the thought of all the other hybrids being able to smell yoongi on his scent gland. 
- Jimin doesn’t know where to put his hands, he knows enough to know that Yoongi doesn’t like to be touched and unsure if it extends to right now. but it seems okay if he’s doing the touching. His hands sliding down Jimin's back to his waist. He’s a good kisser, the best that Jimin’s ever kissed (not that there have been many) and he tips his head forward to put as much scalding force as he can into it when yoongi leaves his neck in favor of his mouth, trying to match Yoongi’s intensity even if he can’t match his skill.
- Yoongi takes a step forward, and Jimin’s cock brushes his hipbone, and he can’t stop the way his hips jump at the contact, brushing into Yoongi further. Jimin’s blood boils with arousal. Yoongi is equally as hard compared to Jimin. And Jimin doesn't know if its water or precum that he feels on his skin. Can't look down to check.
- By the time Yoongi leans back and finishes running his fingers through Jimin’s hair and over his shoulders. Jimin’s so wound up he feels like he’s about the pass out. The cool water cascading over his back doing nothing to settle him. Yoongi moves his hips- testing the waters, as he grinds, works jimin’s hips into an unsteady rhythm. and jimin moans. 
- Yoongi pulls back, looking at jimin, their noses brushing, like he can’t bear to have jimin farther away from him than this, want heavy in his eyes, and Jimin tastes the words on Yoongi’s lips as good as if he’d said them. “Yoongi” jimin breathes. Palms pressed carefully to the shower wall so that he won’t reach out and yank Yoongi closer. But he’s Weak against the wake of this of all this feeling.
- “fuck- kiss me again- can we- ” Jimin feels strung out, his body heavy with something like heat- maybe Jimin is actually having a heat and it’s not just in his imagination (he wouldn't really know what it felt like- never having had one before because of his malnutrition). But This kind of kissing is certainly enough to trigger one.
- Yoongi opens his mouth for a second, almost like he’s about to speak- or to try to, Jimin’s never been sure if he can- if it’s muteness or just Yoongi being selective. And then in the next moment, Yoongi’s gone, almost tripping on his way out of the showers with how fast he’s leaving jimin. A whine dies in his throat and jimin starts after him, But then Yoongi turns back. Gesturing with a hand for jimin to stay put. Yoongi looks angry, and it takes a moment for Jimin to realize that the anger wasn’t directed at jimin- only at Himself.
- Jimin stays in the shower, water thundering down around him as the sky overhead thunders too. Jimin listens to the faint sound of Yoongi dressing and then leaving the showers. Jimin lets him go. So sure that he has absolutely no idea what just happen- or even if he didn’t imagine the whole thing.
- jimin’s hand on himself doesn't feel nearly good as Yoongi’s did. 
- Yoongi’s hands shake all the way back up the hill, and he hopes his wet hair won’t be too suspicious especially when a mixed group of hybrids crosses his path. Returning to the barns as most of the adoption day festivities have ended.
 - Yoongi’s careful to keep his eyes averted. And like usual- the conversation comes to a halt when Yoongi passes them by. It no longer bugs him the way it might have once. They have a good reason not to want to associate with him. Yoongi’s body shakes with the weight of the things he’s done and the things he’s going to do.
- you gather with 3 families on your porch as you take down their names and contact information. You send yoongi a concerned look as he quickly heads inside the house. Pausing only for a moment before he decides to go to Namjoon first. Later- later he’ll ask you too. 
- Stupid- he’s been so stupid recently. Touching you- indulging in these short sweet touches because he wants more so badly. Knows he can never have it doesn’t stop the wanting. If his owner ever found out what he’s done- if she ever found out what he’d almost done with jimin- she’d surely have Jimin’s hands for it. 
- And as much as Yoongi wishes it were any other way- Jimin almost touching him does remind him of far worse times. Though he’d been the one to initiate it this time- the memories still linger. 
- Times when foreign hands touched his skin as he’d thrashed and screamed trying to protest against the taunting words of his owner. “I’ve never been interested in snake dick but if you want him for tonight you can have him- just be careful- he bites” and he shakes with those memories. Though its been many years. like most kinds of torture- eventually, his owner had grown bored with using yoongi's body as a bargaining chip. Yoongi wonders if he’s ever going to be able to be touched that way without feeling the revulsion at his own body.
- Jimin had come close, but he'd known- known that yoongi didn't want him to touch him. Had seemed more than willing to be touched himself. the revulsion hadn't hit him until the end. 
- The places he’s been touched without his consent feel black and decaying- or like ink, every time someone touches him- Yoongi’s surprised that ink doesn’t come away on your hands soft and delicate. But it didn’t change the fact that Yoongi wanted it- and wants it still. 
- he wants to see you soft and sated the way you look sometimes in the morning when he can smell Namjoon on you- wants to cause it- maybe, someday in the future if you'll let him. He knows you’d be gentle with him. Wouldn’t put your hands anywhere he didn’t want. Would check in with him- going as slowly or as quickly as he wanted too. Namjoon would be able to be gentle too- Yoongi’s sure of it.
- He wants it, even though he knows that want only put you all in danger. He’s an incredibly selfish person. He hopes he never gets to have that intimacy with you, for your sake.
- yoongi should only let himself dream of something good before he goes- sinks back into that life. But the temptation for more is too strong sometimes, his want filling him up like sticky sweet syrup that pollutes every moment. 
- Namjoon is on the second floor of your house and Yoongi takes the stairs two at a time. Folding laundry in what will one day be the nursery for your child. He’s taken the ultrasound up here now- hung it up so he can look at it. and Yoongi is reminded of A few days ago when he gushed about the development of your child to Yoongi in the kitchen comparing them to the size of a fruit. “a cute little cantaloupe- the cutest little cantaloupe”
- You and Namjoon have made the decision not to find out the gender, but the walls of the nursery are still pained blue, puffy clouds above and little flowers below, dandelions and daisies, a stalwart sunflower that curls over the arch of the door half-finished. Yoongi knows you work on the mural it whenever you can. But Namjoon gets a little paranoid about the fumes- you compromise and keep the windows open along with the door to your balcony to allow as much air circulation as possible.
- The crib, a fluffy white thing is already piled into the corner. And Yoongi remembers the first few weeks here when you and Namjoon had overzealously ordered it. He’d come downstairs after dinner one night and found both of you puzzling over the directions. And he’d shooed Namjoon away as he’d helped you put it together. The three of you ending up giggly and punch drunk tired by the time it was fully put together. And then had to carry it all the way up the stairs. 
-A mobile of little felted flowers that Seokjin made you as a thank you present a hangs above the empty Crib- colorful and cute. And Namjoon has set the laundry on the unused changing table in neat stacks. All of the other furniture is piled into the center of the room so that you can paint the walls. He turns when he hears Yoongi, his tail swishing.
- “Hey Yoon- what you get caught in a rainstorm or something?” the rain splatters against the windows with a soft patter and Yoongi drips onto the floor. He never bothered to dry off after the unintentional shower with jimin. Yoongi makes a shrug that means ‘something like that’ and if the younger hybrid hovers on the way that Yoongi’s lips look a little kiss bitten and swollen he doesn’t say a thing. Namjoon knows better than anyone- what they talk about and what they don’t.
- He hands over the slip of paper; “jimin should move into the main house, you and I could clean out one of the storage rooms and move the stuff into the attic.”
-  Yoongi watches Namjoon’s eyes rove over the words a few times. The hybrid purses his lips, “I’ve talked to Y/n about this- and she agrees- but I don’t know if he wants too? He seems pretty comfortable in the barns, he likes Taehyung and they’re friends. and we kind of want to leave it up to him if we can.”
- Yoongi snatches the paperback from him, annoyance flickering in his chest as he rolls his eye. Didn’t Namjoon see that nothing would change if they didn’t push him a little? Jimin is the type to take that kind of abuse again and again if it means not making a fuss. And Yoongi knows it’s only a matter of time before something happens again. He turns it over onto the other side and using the wall as a place to write.
- “He’s already being treated differently because of me” 'me' being double underlined- so that Namjoon really understands what he’s trying to say. Yoongi just wants to make sure Jimin is safe before he goes. Before he needs to leave and before it gets too dangerous and too near a time when his owner will physically retrieve him. Not that Namjoon knows that Yoongi’s presence has an expiration date. Namjoon searches Yoongi’s face for a source to his desperation and finds none.
- Yoongi has never felt worse for keeping secrets. Maybe in another world- Yoongi would have confessed and asked Namjoon, with all of his connections to the police, for help. Yoongi knows enough to put the whole crime system out of whack and yet. Years of negative reinforcement and beatings have taught him to keep his mouth shut and that isn’t going to change now; not when Yoongi’s life isn’t the only one at risk and he knows you’ll all live if he plays by the rules. He doesn't care about his own safety anymore. 
- The second he sees Yoongi’s distraught expression Namjoon steps closer Taking off his flannel and tugging it around his shoulders. Namjoon might not make moves to scent mark Yoongi but dressing him in his clothes is as good as he gets. Namjoon’s comforting alpha scent fluffs around him.
- Yoongi wonders if jimin feels the pull the same way he does. Dynamics are more mobile in snake hybrids and downright non-existent in humans. but they’re more set in canines. Namjoon puts his hand on Yoongi’s clothed arm and Yoongi shuffles close after a second. His nose centimeters from Namjoon’s neck taking in deep breathes to try and steady himself. He didn’t realize he was shaking.
- “It will be alright Yoongi, I promise. He’s gonna be safe.” Namjoon adds quieter. And below them both- in the first floor of the house, he can hear your voice, echoing louder and laughing at some sort of joke, Namjoon’s tail starts wagging at the suggestion of you. “I want them to feel safe too.”
- Yoongi wants to write “he should take my room- I won’t be staying in it soon anyway.” but Yoongi needs to make sure- before he leaves. Jimin has to be included in your little pack. He doesn’t want to think- about what the three of you will go through when he eventually has to leave. The days are counting down to the end of the summer. 
- He’s fucking selfish, so selfish, to kiss Jimin like that when he knows he won't be able to stay in the hybrids life. He’s selfish every time he begs affection off you, every day he keeps Namjoon Company when he’s cleaning up the other barns. Yoongi writing out words in the dust when Namjoon asks him questions. Eyes only searching when Namjoon turns his back. Looking for any sort of hidden compartment. Completing his task even if it’s the last thing he wants to do. Betraying you like this.
- Jimin spends the rest of the day wondering if the kiss with Yoongi was just a dream. But later at dinner, Yoongi won’t meet his eyes, and jimin knows he didn’t imagine the kiss. Guilt sticks to Yoongi, more distracting than honey stuck between your fingertips.
- Both of them go to sleep still thinking about the kiss. Jimin wondering if it will happen again and Yoongi thinking that he’d like it too. His fingers running over his lower and upper lips, mind awash with the memory of jimin’s mouth on his. And night falls heavy like a weighted blanket on the farm. The sky a big sheet with holes poked through for stars. A heavenly breeze tempting away the summer heat.
- All of the hybrids safe and snoring in their beds. Some even paired- if they’ve got it. Two furry bodies packed close on a single bed. Some even dream of homes they mind one day live in or of the people that one day they’ll get to love. The idea of being kept and treasured lulling them into a drowsy haze of anticipation and security. 
- That night, Namjoon knocks on Yoongi’s door. the hybrid leaning up against the doorframe as he watches the snake get ready for bed. “you know... you could sleep in our room if you want, we have an air conditioner in there too.” yoongi has a notepad ready, he knows that Namjoon likes to open all the windows and even the door to your balcony to let the fresh air in so that it feels like you're sleeping outside. He steels himself to think of someone other than himself before he writes- “I’m okay- thanks though” Yoongi writes out. 
- Namjoon lifts one of Yoongi’s blankets to his neck before he leaves, thoroughly scents marking it before he leaves it with Yoongi. And Yoongi sleeps easy that night with his nose pressed to the blanket. Safe and secure in his room. Nothing bad happens to yoongi that night even though he cuddles close to the blanket, and when he wakes in the morning. his heart beats a steady thumping rhythm- his whole body humming with anticipation. 
- It’s different to feel excited about being in love, excited for a day spent close to the people he cares about. And he knows he won't take a single day for granted. 
- The crickets and cicadas chirping in the field. And in a low tone on the tree outside, a morning dove gentle and unassuming. The sun rising over the hills. Tastes of idyllic and smells of Eden. Like lavender and honey.
- A hand outstretched, scrambling in the dirt before it goes still, fingers just a few inches from safety. Blood mixing in with the sand. The morning is not perfect for everyone.
- But even you would say the morning was peaceful, if not for the dead body dumped at the end of your driveway. 
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Kofi
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thatbitchsimone · 3 years
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i miss the vibe smoking cigs had when u were a teenager like u just felt so badass and grown and like u were in an episode of skins like u just got this feeling of ooh im doing something i shouldnt im breaking rules teehee fuck u adults u cant stop me i do whatever i want yolo swag but now when ur 23 its just an annoying habit ur a slave to and ur just wasting so much money every month and theres no rush from it bc ur not a kid rebelling anymore ur just an adult with a nicotine addiction who gets moody and pissy if u dont get ur hourly smoke and the vibe is dead like it has the same vibe of like being a nail biter its just a nasty habit u cant seem to give up
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