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deepmochi · 2 years ago

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•☆°♡Triggers

Disclaimer: I don't own any of these images. These are my observations, so be polite and don't steal my work. if this post triggers you, just ignore it.

Hello cute mochies 💚

This topic is not about astrology, but we need to talk about this. In this astro/spiritual community in tumblr happens a lot. Many people get trigger by post or observations.

How many times you have thought or read "I'm a______ but I don't act like that; Don't generalize". The irony is that majority of posts hace disclaimers like: "don't take this personally or these are only my observations".

Then, why people wrote those comments? Why a blogger would know everyone? Of course there is generalization in observations, we only have access to small portion of people. If you just got mad after someone say "Virgo moons are too critical" Babe, this shoudl resonates if you aren't like that just scroll.

So, have you see that word, trigger? Do you know its meaning? Have you been triggered before?

The answer maybe a yes or "no" because triggers can happen at any time without you fully acknowledge it. When we get triggered, we don't understand why we feel a certain way. The most common emotion we detect is anger, but you can feel other emotions like sadness and fear. However, the majority of time is unconscious and only a few times people are aware. When we are younger (teenager years ), it can happen often.

•☆°♡ When we start our spiritual journey, we may start noticing more often these emotions/ feelings arising, but there they appear without a "reason" or at least we are not consciously aware.

So, these intense feelings without a reason are the famous triggers. It can happen whenever you are watching a movie, meeting a person, reading a book, or listening to music; they present themselves at any time. Again, the word is considered bad, yet these triggers can help us to heal deep wounds. Of course it's not easy, it can take time for you to acknowledge or manage the trigger. Triggers could give us a glimpse of our shadow self too. What we don't accept of ourselves. So, patience is required

Trigger example with a person:

If you ever met someone, and they are unbearable to you without a proper reason. With this, I'm talking about just hating or disliking them without logical reason. If someone is rude to you, that is a reason. If you haven't talked with them or had any interaction, hating on them is illogical.

A real life experience:

I had a classmate that makes me "angry", and I didn't know why. I always find myself annoyed by her attitude makes, and that makes me mad. Just to clarify, she never treat me bad or anything; it was all my perception of her. I was tired of her. We never had a disagreement or anything. I just dislike how everyone seems to like her so much? My resentment didn't have any logical reason, though. Then, one day after thinking about possible reasons, and it hit me. Why she was so well-liked? why her not me. She was confident and I wasn't. I was jealous, but it took time for me to see it.

You see, in this case, I felt annoyed about her, but the reasons weren't there. It was not my intuition; It was my ego. Sometimes, we reject parts of ourselves, we don't acknowledge. I consider myself a good person, so why would I feel jealous? So, I didn't acknowledge that emotion as good, which mean I reject the part. It took me so long to see it.

In my case, I was not seeing that my classmate was so well-liked because she is herself. Meanwhile, I was hiding parts of myself because I was scared of what others think of me. In the end, I was jealous of her because I was hiding myself. She trigger that on me. And I told myself, instead of hating this girl, I should admire her. After that, I decide to work on my self esteem by accepting my jealousy and work on it.

Note: she was not responsible of my trigger, and nobody should be.

Projecting and trigger

Some people think triggers = projection, but they aren't the same. Most of the time, a trigger can lead to projection.

A projection is more obvious. With projection, you know what irritates you; it can be an attitude or a person. For instance, TikTok shows us videos of people like that all the time. A famous example, is a man saying he doesn't want to date a certain body shape, like who asks him? Nobody, but he felt the need to share it. But why? it is probable that he saw a fat/slim/tall/short woman with someone, so he felt angry about it. Why them not me? Why I can be find a partner too? they are just angry that someone in a non conventional standard is happier than them. Usually, we ask why people post that kind of videos. They are not fully aware how bad they look; there only objective is to hurt others because they feel hurt

Again, a common example, one judging someone's body. If they are slim or fat, it is not your problem. Keep walking.

A less obvious example: When someone irritates you because they are being dramatic, and you ask them "what are you so dramatic?" it is possible that you act dramatic in other ways too, but you don't realise it, so projections happen.

Just remember how triggers work

Object (person-movie-etc) + intense feeling + unknown or conscious reason

Result: trigger

A trigger will not be explained easily. It can happen with any movie, person, or event you present.

Recommendations:

If this trigger happens, try to breathe. Inhale and exhale slowly and try to empty.

2. Try to work with them slowly, and heal that wound or trauma.

3. Triggers teach us about the parts that we hide, so if you go to therapy try to ask why a certain sensation rises on specific occasions.

4. Don't blame yourself or shame yourself, just be open to its message.

5. Feel the emotion don't try to be logical. Try to feel it (describe the sensations) and then label what you feel.

#astrologia #astrology #deepmochi #astrologynotes #triggers #spiritualism #psychology #astronotes

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floating-mid-air · 3 years ago

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The Princess of all Saiyans

Masterlist

Hey Everyone! It's been a while. My life's been kind of hectic the past couple of months. Long story short: I Graduated from Highschool this year, so I was busy with everything having to do with that. Then my summer job sadly prevented me from writing as well. And then I started College, which was a big change for me. For now, there are no more chapters in my life opening or closing. Now I'm finally in a place where I feel comfortable continuing this book again. I could've honestly been writing during all of this chaos. But I wouldn't have been pleased with the quality of my writing. I'm really excited to get back into the swing of things. I don't think this chapter panned out the way I originally planned, but I'm still happy with it. As always, I hope you enjoy it. And if you have any comments or concerns, feel free to let me know. My inbox is always open!

Chapter 11

You've been walking for quite some time now, and the experience has been excruciating. You haven't been in this much pain since you and Raditz were on planet Telia, ten-something years ago. Those damn underlings were able to get a good sneak attack on you. Though you can't say, you let them get away scot-free. You made sure to make their entire dreadful race pay for that injury. You and Raditz had covered up that incident, much like you're doing with your current injury.

"So---" You can hear Goku talking to Krillin from just slightly left of you. "Did you guys find the senzu beans?" Wow, Kakarot may be the least subtle creature you've ever encountered.

"Ya." Krillin chuckles. "All four of us were in pretty rough shape." Goku glances at you with a worried look on his face. You glare at him as Raditz eyes the two of you skeptically. He knows something's off between the two of you. Maybe something serious did happen while you and his brother were trapped together.

A bit more time has passed, and you've been trying your best to keep up with the others. But it isn't as easy as you thought. You're now trailing behind the rest of them, with Raditz turning back to look at you every so often. The largest Saiyan slows down to catch up with your slower pace, now walking beside you.

He turns to you, whispering in a low tone. "Something's off." Raditz can no longer stay silent about his concerns. First, it was the strange vibes between you and Kakarot. And now it's your out-of-character demeanor making him uneasy.

"About what?"

"You. Typically you walk beside your brother, and when he doesn't let you, you make sure you're always only a few paces behind. But right now, you couldn't be more content to trail everyone. Plus, you're far too confident to not be in the very front." Raditz has been around far too long for your liking. Damn him. He knows you far too well, and you hate him for it.

You roll your eyes at him. "So this conclusion of yours is based on the way I'm walking? I'm tired. When I fought, Burter, that physically drained me. And then I got trapped in a ditch with your moronic brother, that mentally drained me. I'm exhausted, Raditz."

"It's not just the way you're walking. It's your mannerisms as well." He points at your side. "Your hand hasn't moved from your side from the moment I first saw you."

"God, Raditz." You scoff. "Stop overanalyzing everything."

"Getting defensive now? That's your M.O whenever you're hiding something." He looks back and forth between your face and your hand that has remained glued to your side. The gears in the older Saiyan's head slowly but surely turning. " Y/N, are you hurt?"

"No." You snap your eyes shut, biting your lip hard enough to draw blood in an attempt to suppress a wince of pain. "I'm fine."

He tilts his head at you. "Y/N, I know you claim otherwise, but I'm not stupid. I know you're in pain."

You chuckle softly in a self-pitying way. "Am I that easy to read?"

Raditz shakes his head, smiling to himself. "No, I've just known you for a long time now." He returns to his serious demeanor, his gaze returning to the area of your wound. "How bad is it?"

"I barely feel it at all. Though, climbing out of that ditch must have reopened the cut."

Raditz snickers. "You're a bad liar."

"That's strange. I've been told in the past that I'm quite good at lying."

A smirk spreads across Raditz's lips. "Well, you apparently aren't when I'm involved."

The larger Saiyan glances at the back of your brother's head. You respond with a glare, firmly pulling on a large chunk of his hair. You know what Raditz wants to do, and it's not happening. "Don't even think about it."

"I-I think we should tell him Y/N."

"No." You let go of his hair, tapping his chest with extreme force. "You're going to keep your big mouth shut. Vegeta will freak out. You know how irrational he gets."

Raditz decides to let you have your way--- for now. The man can't help but wonder why you're so stubborn, but then again, his nature isn't much different from yours.

With every minute that passes, your condition only seems to worsen. Your eyes even start to droop. "Y/N?" Raditz turns to you, his features beginning to fill with worry. He places one of his large hands on your forehead. You're burning up. "You have a fever. Your wound must be infected."

"No." You shake your head in disagreement, almost like a child. As your mental state becomes more and more delirious.

"Vegeta!" Raditz shouts, gaining your brother's attention.

"Fuck you, Raditz! You're such a blabbermouth!" You shout at the larger Saiyan in front of you.

"What's wrong this time? Is my sister trying to pull you into another one of her elaborate schemes?"

"Y/N's hurt--- bad." Vegeta's eyes widen, and not even a millisecond later, he rushes to your side. "She has a fever. I think her cut is infected."

"Where is it?" He crosses his arms at you, noticing your hand placed firmly on your side. He moves your hand out of the way with ease, lifting your armor. "How did this happen?"

"Burter nicked me during our fight. It's no big deal."

"No big deal? It's infected, you stupid woman!" He turns his attention to Kakarot. "Did you know about this?"

You snicker. "Oh ya, Vegeta. I get hurt, and the first person I run to tell is Kakarot." Vegeta's fists clench at your sarcastic remark, turning his fit of rage back at you.

"You know, in certain situations, you're more prone to infections. And a planet like Namek checks all of the boxes! You know you need to be more careful. Damn our mother and her faulty genetics!" Sadly that's a trait you had inherited from your mother. On most planets, you'd be fine, and injuring yourself would be no big deal. But Namek has specific conditions that result in you being more vulnerable.

"Raditz, pick her up." Raditz picks you up, giving you a piggyback ride. You wrap your arms around his neck, giving yourself better balance. Vegeta glances up at you. He looks even madder than usual. "With the condition, you're in, you will not be fighting. You will stay away from Jeice, and you won't even enter the same proximity as Ginyu. Do you understand me?"

"But--"

"No!" His voice booms, gaining the attention of every creature for miles. "I'm not kidding around. Do you understand me?"

You bite your lip, tilting your head downwards, avoiding your brother's gaze like the plague. "Yes, Vegeta." Vegeta returns to the front of the group, his mood sourer than ever.

As Raditz begins to walk, he starts talking to you again. "Are you mad at me?" You don't verbally respond. Instead, you claw into his shoulders, your nails digging into his flesh. "Fuck. I'll take that as a yes."

"You're a tattletale."

Raditz chuckles. "No wonder why Vegeta babies you. You'll thank me for this later, you stubborn woman. And I've kept your secrets before, handfuls of them, actually. Like what happened on planet Telia----" Raditz realized the grave mistake he had just made, mentioning that incident in the presence of the very being you worked so hard to hide it from.

You slap the older Saiyan upside the head as Vegeta turns backward, a scowl plastered on his face. "What happened on plant Telia?" It was a rhetorical question, mocking both you and Raditz. "Oh, the three of us will be discussing this in length later. Because it sounds to me like you both lied to me on that initial report." You and Raditz gulp, you've heard that tone from your brother millions of times now, and it has never once become any less terrifying.

"Oh, lighten up, Geta." You groan. "That was like, what? Around thirteen years ago?"

"The amount of time that has passed matters very little to me. As I said before, this is a discussion for later."

A few more hours have passed, which honestly feels like days at this point. And considering Namek's strange day cycle, it very well could've been. "How much farther?" Your question was clearly directed at Vegeta. And at this point, you're not even sure he has any idea where you're headed either.

"I don't know why you're the one complaining." Raditz huffs. "You're not the one doing all of the walking! And if you ask him that one more time, I'm going to drop you." Ok so maybe, that wasn't the first time you've asked that question today. Or the second, or third, you're very bored.

"Man Raditz." You roll your eyes, which are barely open at this point. "You sure complain--- a lot."

"You were just complaining." The long-haired Saiyan grumbles.

"No, I simply asked Vegeta a question. There's a difference Raditz. I know it's hard for your feeble mind to understand." When you're sick, you tend to act, oh what's the word? Bitcher than normal. And that's saying a lot.

Raditz clenches his jaw. "Vegeta. I need a break from your sister."

"That's how I felt ninety percent of the time I was stuck in a room with you, Nappa, and Cado. And you didn't see me running to wine to Frieza about it."

Before Raditz can retort, your brother interjects. "That's enough! From both of you!"

Krillin, Gohan, and Goku have identical bewildered expressions on their faces. Krillin turns to Vegeta, lowering his voice to a whisper. He doesn't want to be the next victim of your wrath. "Do they always fight like this?" The human finds this perplexing. Back on Earth, the pair seemed inseparable. They appeared to be the Saiyan equivalent of what on Earth would be considered best friends.

Vegeta lets out an exaggerated sigh. "Yes, but typically it's more playful in nature. When my sister is sick, she becomes even brattier than usual."

Vegeta's warning to both of you seems to have fallen on dead ears. Because your quarrel has not ceased, in fact, it has only elevated. "I will drop you, you royal brat!"

"I dare you to you second-class runt. I could still kick your ass even in my delirious state. I wouldn't even have to try very hard."

"I'm considering----"

Before Raditz can even get three words out, your bickering is once again interrupted, and not by the person you may think. "Enough!" Gohan shouts. You honestly forgot the others were here for a moment."If you two keep fighting like this, you're going to get all of us killed!" You and Raditz stare at the boy in shock. It's been a long time since the two of you have been yelled at by a child. The last time being when you were children yourselves. Vegeta hasn't changed much since childhood. He's been bossing you around and shouting at you since you were children, but I'm sure that's not very surprising.

"Ya, and I can take Y/N---- if you need a break." Goku rubs the back of his neck, chuckling sheepishly. "Not that I want to hold Y/N or anything."

"No." You rapidly shake your head. "Raditz, I'm sorry. I'll be good now--- I promise."

A wicked grin spreads across Raditz's lips right before he grabs your hands with his larger ones. He loosens your grip around his neck, moving your body with ease, scooping you up into his arms. Every step Raditz takes toward Goku seems even more antagonizing slower than the last. Until he's standing directly in front of his younger brother. He elevates his arms slightly, dropping you right in front of an unsuspecting Goku.

Lucky for you, Goku has sharp reflexes. That allows the Saiyan to catch you easily. Raditz look's his brother dead in the eyes, his typical arrogant grin still on his lips. "She's your problem now, Kakarot." Raditz gazes downward to look at you. "Stop pouting. Maybe next time, you'll be nicer to good old Raditz."

A low growl echoes in the back of your throat as you glare daggers at the Saiyan standing before you. "Ya, or maybe next time, I'll rip out your tail and strangle you with it!" The only thing that's stopping you from lunging at Raditz is Goku's firm grip holding you in place.

Rather than arguing that the entire group has become accustomed to, the whole area has become dead silent. You're no longer pouting. Instead, you are glaring at the man who continues to carry you bridal style. You've never liked being held like this. It makes you feel weak like you have no control over your own body.

What makes you even more irritated, Is how Goku reacts to your death stare. He just grins at you. Does he just never get angry? What kind of Saiyan is he? It fills you with so much anger that someone as dopey as Kakarot has Saiyan blood flowing through his veins.

You clench your fists. You just wanna punch Kakarot so badly. He just has such a punchable face. If you could take away his cheery personality, he'd actually be quite attractive. Wait--- what the hell are you thinking? Kakarot is stupid and way too friendly for you to ever think of him in that way.

You move your fist up, finally giving in to your urges, attempting to punch the man holding you. Probably not your wisest moment, but your brain isn't functioning normally right now. Goku catches your hand with ease. His reflexes are unreal, or maybe this fever has you more sluggish than you believed. You'd prefer to think that it's the second option. He chuckles to himself. He's still not upset. What the hell is wrong with him? "Come on, Y/N. You gotta be quicker than that." He's challenging you. How Saiyan like of him. You seem to always be able to find specks of Saiyan nature in the cheerful man. And those are the aspects you actually like about him.

Your eyes begin to once again feel heavy as your eyes droop shut, just before you fall asleep in the arms of your enemy.

Twenty-Something Years Ago:

You're sitting on your bed, sitting crisscrossed, a book laying open on your lap. Since your father is currently off-planet, you can read all you want. You're enamored with your newest book. It's all about a topic referred to as diplomacy. It's fascinating and has many concepts that are entirely foreign to you, yet at the same time, some of these ideas are also familiar.

As you read, your door slams open, but you pay the interruption almost no attention, not even bothering to look up from your book. Honestly, the unwelcome intrusion has you more angered than anything else. "God, Vegeta." You roll your eyes. "Haven't you ever heard of knocking?" Something's not right. When Vegeta usually bursts into your room, he's automatically shouting at you.

Out of pure curiosity, you look up from your book. However, standing at your door, you don't find Vegeta. A boy with a very similar appearance but with a much smaller stature stands in your door frame. He's out of breath, desperately huffing for air. "Tarble?" You furrow your brows at your brother, launching off your bed to get closer to him. "What's wrong?" You have this sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach. Your twin has never behaved in such a manner before.

"Captain--- Captain Ginyu is here." Tarble is shaking, his eyes watering slightly.

You scowl ever so slightly. "But Ginyu's not scheduled to be on planet Vegeta any time soon."

"It's--- It's a surprise visit. What do we do, Y/N?"

You contemplate for a moment before your features fill with alarm. "Tarble? Where's Vegeta?"

His lip quivers as he looks down at the floor. "He's with Captain Ginyu."

"Damn it." You mutter under your breath. Diplomacy is a skill you need right now. And Vegeta doesn't have a single quality that a diplomat possesses. Your elder brother is more likely to unnecessarily provoke the Captain, putting your entire race in hot water with the Frieza Force.

You rush over to your bedside table, rummaging through the drawer. Once you have your scouter in your hand, you run back over to your brother. "Stay in here, and use this to channel our father. Let him know what's going on." You push past your twin, about to leave, before Tarble's voice calls out to you.

"Wait, Y/N!" You turn back to look at him. "Where are you going?"

"I have to go stop our older brother from doing something stupid. Everything will be fine, I promise. Just calm down and do as I said." And with that, you take off, praying that Vegeta hasn't already done something rash.

As you sprint down the halls of the palace, you run face-first into the torso of a large body. "Princess?"

You look up at the bald Saiyan, the one who's supposed to be at your brother's side at all times. Since the future king of planet Vegeta needs to be protected. "Nappa, Where is my brother?"

The imbecile scratches the back of his neck, contemplating much longer for your liking. "I'm not sure. I haven't seen the runt in quite some time. You should probably ask Vegeta."

You scowl at the Saiyan. "Not Tarble, you fool! I'm asking you where Vegeta is!"

"Oh, Why didn't you just say so?" It's taking every ounce of restraint you have in your body to not viciously attack Nappa. "He's just outside of the palace."

You run through Nappa, intentionally knocking the large Saiayn onto the floor. His stupidity lost you precious time. It was quite an amusing sight, though. A mere child, being able to take down one of your father's best warriors.

You arrive outside of the palace, your eyes landing on your target. This is the first time you've ever seen Captain Ginyu. Sure, you've heard stories of the purple man. And much like your people, Ginyu is just as bloodthirsty and just as ruthless. Much to your surprise, the Captain doesn't have an army behind him. This was just before the Ginyu Force had formed. All Ginyu was at this point in time was a captain of one of Frieza's many armies.

You walk over to them, now standing at your brother's side. "Captain Ginyu." You speak with your hands, an exaggerated smile appearing on your lips. "To what do we owe the honor?"

The man looks down at you, clearly analyzing you with his scouter. "Well, if this isn't a surprise. I think this is the first time I've had the pleasure of meeting you, Y/N." Ginyu extends his large hand out to you, causing Vegeta to feel a great deal of alarm. Your brother's body has gone tense with an apprehensive look on his face. But when your older brother looks over to you, there isn't even a glint of fear in your eyes. You're calm, almost as if one of Lord Frieza's deadliest warriors was not standing before you. You accept the Captain's hand, presenting him with a short but polite handshake. "Your father doesn't like showing you off much, does he?"

You chuckle softly. "My father likes to hold his cards close to his chest. I'm sure a man like yourself is quite similar." Sucking up to Ginyu is not your favorite pastime, but it needs to be done. And every Saiyan on this planet knows your big brother is far too prideful to do it himself.

Ginyu looks between you and Vegeta carefully. For someone so highly regarded by Frieza, he sure isn't subtle. He's trying to read your facial expressions. Unfortunately for him, your father has raised you both much better than that. A poker face to you feels more natural than a genuine expression. "Speaking of your father, where is he right now?"

"He's of---"

You quickly cut Vegeta off. "He's in a meeting. That's why our father sent me out. He wanted you to know he sends his regards, but his hands are tied at the moment. He will be here at soon as possible. I hope my brother and I can suffice your needs in the meantime."

Captain Ginyu eyes you skeptically, tilting his head at you ever so slightly. "That sounds serious. I hope it's nothing too pressing."

"Of course not. It's nothing my father can't handle."

You're about to continue your schmoozing, but you're stopped by Vegeta aggressively yanking on your arm. "We need to talk-- in private."

You grimace at your brother's words. He just always has to make everything that much more difficult for you. You turn back to Ginyu, offering the man a cheerful smile. "Will you excuse us for a moment? We'll be right back."

Vegeta drags you around a corner, concealing you both from Ginyu's prying eyes. "What do you think you're doing?" He huffs at you in a whisper. "I had everything under control."

You snicker, crossing your arms. "You were just about to tell Ginyu that our father was off-planet. It sounds to me like I got here just in time to prevent you from making a grave mistake."

"I don't see why that matters."

"And that's the issue, Vegeta. Now we don't have time for this. Let's go." You turn back around, walking back over to Ginyu, Vegeta trailing not far behind. "I'd like to apologize for my brother's rudeness, Captain Ginyu." You shake your head but with a slight smirk across your lips. "All Saiyan men are the same, and my brother is no exception. They're incredibly thickheaded and quite savage. I'm convinced they don't even realize what brutes they are." You watch your brother ball his hands up into fists from beside you. It fills you with an immense feeling of joy knowing you're getting under Vegeta's skin for once. You turn back to Ginyu, plastering that disingenuous grin on your face. "Now, how about we give you a tour of our wonderful planet?"

You and Vegeta have shown Ginyu around almost the entirety of your planet, and you must admit you're beginning to grow worried. Luckily you've managed to hold off any more questions about your father's whereabouts by charming him with various facts about planet Vegeta. But to be honest, you're not sure how much longer you can hold up this charade for. You've exhausted pretty much every idea that you've been able to come up with.

"Captain Ginyu!" Your father's brash voice invades your ears as you turn around to finally see the man you've been anxiously waiting for. You've never seen your father walk in such an urgent manner, and it's pretty funny watching your twin struggling to keep up with your father's pace.

Your father places himself between you and Vegeta, ruffling your hair affectionately. You look up at him. "How'd your meeting go?"

Your father meets your gaze, catching onto your deception almost immediately. "It went very well. Thank you both for keeping Captain Ginyu company in my absence, but I think I can handle it from here." He directs his attention back onto Captain Ginyu. "Now, how about we discuss you're abrupt arrival somewhere more private."

The two men exit your field of view, leaving the three of you alone. Tarble, in his typical fashion, glues himself to your side. "What the hell was that?" Vegeta spits out with venom. "Where was your pride? You were basically groveling at his feet."

You furrow your brows at him. "I was doing what needed to be done. And if you think our father isn't currently doing the same thing, you're a bigger fool than I thought."

"I know our father is being more agreeable with him, but not at the cost of his pride."

"It's always about pride with you." You step closer to Vegeta, closing the distance between you. "Your pride today would have cost the loss of countless lives today, Vegeta."

"Then so be it. If there are Saiayn's that inadequate on our planet, we should probably just exterminate them now. It'll save us the hassle later on."

You snicker, shaking your head at Vegeta. "Some King you'll be." You turn to your twin. "Let's go, Tarble. I have no desire to be near our foolish brother right now."

The conversation between Captain Ginyu and your father was brief. It was a very anticlimactic ending to the naked eye. The briefness of this encounter only set off more alarm bells in King Vegeta's head. It was clear to the man that Ginyu's excuse for being on his planet was bullshit. He's just not quite sure what the captain's intentions were, but he sure as hell is going to find out.

As soon as Ginyu left planet Vegeta, he promptly set course for his next destination. He's headed straight to Lord Frieza to report his findings, and he's eager to do so.

Ginyu arrives on the planet in record time, heading straight for the throne room. Ginyu kneels before Frieza, waiting for his boss to speak. "Captain Ginyu. You're sure back early. I trust you were able to gather enough information on the young prince."

Captain Ginyu nods enthusiastically. "Of course, Lord Frieza. The Price was exactly the same as the previous data we collected on him. He's powerful and quite intelligent for a Saiyan. Though, he did inherit that nasty temper from his father."

Frieza sighs. "How disappointing."

"But I did discover something that you may find interesting, Lord Frieza."

Frieza tilts his head at the man. He can't help but feel intrigued. "Go on." It's not that easy for him to find an advantage over those monkeys, so he'll take any information Ginyu can give him, no matter how minuscule.

"Y/N--- King Vegeta's daughter piqued my interest greatly. She's not even close to as strong as her brother, but she's remarkably clever. She's very good with words, she knows how to manipulate people. I'd say she might even be better than King Vegeta himself."

"Now, that is fascinating. Good work, Ginyu. I'll look into the Princess's abilities more in-depth later. You're excused."

This is just something I felt the need to clarify: So in this chapter's flashback, Vegeta is around three, and Y/N and Tarble are about two. In my head, I picture children on planet Vegeta behaving like miniature adults. My idea is once they leave their chambers (the tanks they are raised in to get their basic Saiyan instincts under control), their minds are fully grown, but their physical growth is quite delayed. That's why they curse and stuff. I have a minuscule window of time to squash in all of my plot ideas. So this was the best way to do so.

#goku #goku x reader #saiyan reader #vegeta #vegeta's sister #DBZ Fanfiction #dbz x reader #dragon ball x reader #dragon ball z #the princess of all saiyans

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bokuroo-squeals · 4 years ago

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Of rough time, marriage and fears

Daichi x reader

Genre: Requested angst to fluff

Summary: After a year of being happily married, trouble seems to appear at paradise when Daichi starts growing distant.

Note: This is not the best, and I don't think I took it the right direction but it was fun to experiment with this. Let me know if there's any orthographic or grammar mistake ,and thank you for reading!!

Marriage is more than a pretty wedding and golden rings, more than a cozy house with nice plants to water. Marriage is way more than all that, so it's not surprise to have though days, fights and disagreements are not a foreign concept, but nothing of this was enough to break you and Daichi. Or so you thought.

One year into your spouse life started like a dream. Even when the road had potholes in the way, you two were mature about it and faced them together. Every morning you woke up next to the love of your life, and he held you close as if you were the most valuable thing in the world, and for a while, you thought you were to him. But months gone by taught you otherwise, because now the space between you was unbearable, like ice left too long on skin. And how it started you don't know, but you wished you did.

The first sign was Daichi growing distant, the second one was him getting in contact with an old friend, a past 'almost something' he knew since high school. And then, it was him spending more time with friends, with her, and you left alone at home to play the loyal housekeeper, the cute spouse that cleaned and cooked but couldn't enjoy dinner with the husband. So it hurt, the feeling of being left behind was slowly filling your lungs until you couldn't gasp for air normally, until the sensation was too much to handle.

The night was as normal as it could go, with you sitting on the couch, waiting for Daichi to come back home from work. Dinner had grown cold, and the clock's hands had moved so much for you to remember how long have you been waiting. Alone in a house meant for two, you couldn't help but feel lonely without Daichi, and you stop to thing briefly, maybe it's your own fault.

It's almost midnight when you hear the door open, then the shuffle of his shoes against the floor. He comes to through the frame, notices your figure and walks your way with heavy steps, Daichi's weight pulling him down in every movement of his legs shows how tired he is.

"It's late, you shouldn't have wait for me. I was out with Suga and the rest after work" he explains briefly after he collapsed next to you on the couch, finally giving into exhaustion.

The conversation ends like that.

Next time is not as peaceful

"Where are you going?" You asked again, the third time already on the week. You're tired, tired of not feeling like you still matter to him, exhausted of feeling him escape through your fingers even when he is right there in front of you.

"Another class reunion. Yuna-san..."

Your blood rushes with anger and you don't let him finish, you can't. It's too unbearable, the feeling of fury.

"Yuna-san? Another reunion? Daichi, please. You're rarely home this days, please, can you just stay with me this time?" Is not easy or possible for you to mask how exasperated you are at this point. Your husband notices the trembling of your body, coming closer to you with a tired sigh.

"We talked about this. Don't do this tonight, Y/n" with how hard he mutters it, it comes out like a warning, one that you're willing to ignore in favor of your feelings. This time is different, any patience or consideration have been thrown to the drain by you, and you are finally ready to explore.

"No! We haven't talk about this, we never talk, and that's the problem! Is always just you asking me to drop it, to leave you alone, to swallow everything inside me, and honestly, I'm not doing that anymore" He stares at you with brows knitted together tightly, a clear sign of him not approving what he takes as a tantrum for his attention.

"We'll talk when you have calmed down. Until then, I'm going out" Daichi turns to walk out, about to leave the scene like nothing, like your marriage was nothing.

Tears you didn't know were there start falling out of your eyes, dramatic style out of a lame romantic movie.

For him, it started with jokes and teasing from the team, making fun of him for a few laughs. It wasn't anything too malicious, a few comments here and there over his marriage life, how he was an old man now and how they were getting ready to not see him anymore at reunions or parties. Daichi could handle that, even laughing along with them, until Yamamori Yuna arrived back into his life.

There was a school reunion that he decided to attend after months of being stressed by work, just going out for some drinks and catch up with their past classmates, a night to refresh those records left in their memories from their youth. Everyone was chatting animatedly, the same jokes Daichi was used to were repetead, which he responded with an equally happy laugh. But the girl next to him frowned, her hand discreetly sneaking in a smooth motion all over his arm to get to his shoulder.

"Doesn't it bother you, Sawamura-san? They're making fun of you. " The seemingly troubled expression on her face was enough to cut his laughter.

"It's alright, I'm having fun out of it too"

"Well, it's not fun for me as your friend. Ever since the wedding you have been so engrossed on your partner, that it looks like have forgotten to be your own person, and now you're the joke of your friends". Yamamori's frown deepened even more, her pretty face painted with fake consern. She was so immersed in the little act, in her own selfish intentions, that every word sounded like authentic worry.

That conversation stays engraved on his mind more than it should've.

It's not like he doesn't love you, because he does. The band on his finger is the proof of his adoration towards you, but the fear of losing himself is powerful and big enough to overthink. Daichi starts going out more, because after thinking about it, he was closing off his friends, going out less, not answering texts, missing calls and updates from his friends.

Yuna seems to have all the answers for the questions plaguing his mind, so naturally, he hangs out more with her and his friends. Getting loose and enjoying himself with other people that's not you, because he thinks it what he needs.

He's told you before that she's hanging out with the boys and him lately, he's talked about her when you ask where he was or what was he doing. It's not like he's hiding the fact that he's been in contact with her, yet you still feel like trash when the ghost of doubt makes it's way on your heart.

When he returns, he doesn't expect you to be awake, thinking that you'd be on your shared bed, passed out after calming yourself. But you're as awake as you could be, with bloodshot eyes and dry tears over your sad features, and his heart pants with pain at the view. Is heartbreaking, seeing you as equally heartbroken, and us even more heartbreaking knowing he was the cause of your suffering. So he holds you, close to his heart to comfort a little what he has hurt.

"You don't love anymore. You're gonna leave me for her, Yuna" your words are tainted by anguish. An uncomfortable affirmation from your part, one that's not even close to the truth. His breathing stops and for a moment, he swears his heart does too.

"Don't say that, don't you dare say that again. I love you so much, you don't even understand." He opens up his heart with you.

Fifteen minutes is how much it takes him to explain to you all what has gotten to his mind ever since the first reunion. How he was afraid of not being him anymore, of being forgotten by his friends, of hovering over you too much.

"I'm awful, I'm the worst. My selfishness is the worst. I know, now I know. But please, you're the only one for me, I'd never cheat or leave you. The only one on my mind is you. At this point, you've ruined everything for me; love, sex, even religion. No-one can come close to whatever you do, to whatever you make me feel, I can't be tempted by anything that isn't you".

You belive him, you do. The way words spill so easily, flowing like water, can't be faked, neither can be the sparkle in his eye which you hadn't seen in weeks.

Daichi's path to redemption begins with being home early after work. Coming to your arms as soon and fast as he can, welcoming your warmth deep in his soul. Once again in your embrace, is hard for him to think just how much has he been missing out.

Is the kisses and hand holding, is your voice and your love what makes Daichi feel safe.

"Daichi, you have to shave" you tell him between giggles, his facial hair caressing the skin on your neck making you itchy.

"Later" he murmurs while he inhales your scent. It calms him down, it relaxes him.

Right now, he has to hold you close, love you as much as he can to make up for the bitter days he had made you suffer. Right now, you feel as safe and as happy as possible, between his arms that are your real home, beside him where you belong.

Marriage is more than just a pretty house and golden rings. Marriage is failing and hurting, with the promise of fixing whatever it needs to mend together.

#haikyuu #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!!#sawamura daichi #daichi x reader #daichi sawamura x reader #daichi fluff #daichi headcanon #haikyuu fanfiction

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haveyoureadgoodomens · 3 years ago

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What a great analysis. I would like to comment on this. (it ended being longer than I expected and includes spoilers for A Stitch in Time, in case you haven't read it.)

First, I can understand the attraction towards repetitive epics and stories with predictable endings. In fact, I never understood why people got upset about spoilers. If the twist or surprise of how a story ends is the only thing that makes you like it, I think it mustn't be a very good story at all. I like knowing how a story ends: what matters to me is how the characters got there, how the narrator told the story, how the author planned and structured it. And I think this happens, in a way, to all of us when reading genre literature. If I read a detective story, I know the character placed in the detective position will end up unravelling the mystery and finding the culprit. When we read a romance novel, we know the two characters will end up entangled together in a love affair, that may or may not outlast the ending. We have genres because we like to read the same stories over and over again. We like how they feel / how they make us feel, and that is why we read those stories.

In a way, that is similar to the repetitive epic. Last time I checked, Agatha Christie was the top 1 bestseller in the world, and she wrote a very specific genre. Even in the most exceptional of her novels, such as Murder on The Orient Express or The murder of Roger Ackroyd, we don't get anything too different from the usual Christie fare. Aren't we reading again and again the story of a detective finding the clues and figuring out the mystery? At the most basic level, they are all same story, just told in a different way.

Second, I'd like to talk about the very interesting point @lorenzobane makes about Garak's idea that the character's actions being good is what makes a story good.

What I found hilarious of Garak's commentary on Julius Caesar is that he doesn't criticize Brutus for killing Caesar, but Caesar for not noticing the intentions of his friend. One would say that in a hierarchical society as Cardassia, killing your superior would be problematic. Cardassians aren't Klingons, who will kill at the first sign of weakness from a commander. In Cardassia, even the most stupid orders are followed if issued by the person in power. We see that with Damar obeying Dukat's orders even when we disagrees. At best, he dares to voice his disagreement, but executes them none the less. He plays errand boy for him, taking dresses to Kira, talking to Ziyal when he is not a family member, and he didn't take action when the Federation attacked to recover DS9, following Dukat's orders. Even Weyoun was distrustful of Dukat's overconfidence, but Damar did nothing. Had they been Klingons, he would have killed Dukat. But he isn't, and he didn't. He obeyed.

Is Garak projecting fantasies when he blames Caesar for not noticing the betrayal of his friend? Because it is murder, yes, but first it is a betrayal. I think that Garak had never read a story in which the murder of a superior even happened. From what we read in A Stitch in Time, when a higher up was troublesome, the Order took care of it by finding material about that person so as to indict them and have them tried in court. That is what he was ordered to do to Dukat's father. And when he finally killed Lokar, who was one of the higher ups with great prospects to achieve the top of Cardassian society, Garak was exiled, effect immediately.

Because of this, Garak was ill equipped to analyze the play. Just imagine, the first Earth book your new Federation friend recommends you to read is: 1) completely subversive and against your values, 2) representative of one of your crimes (in killing your superior and your "friend", which was kind of the relationship he had with Lokar, they had been friends in Bamarren), and as far as I can imagine, 3) connected with deeply hidden fantasies of killing Tain which an accomplished assassin like Garak must have entertained. Even if he would never admit them to himself (until he read the play, naturally). If Garak had been Brutus and Caesar been Tain, Tain would have known about the assassination attempt. That is what Garak is telling Julian when he criticizes the play.

About Cardassian literature now. Garak gives Julian books that are FAMOUS in Cardassia. Books that are studied at university, books that everyone admires. In such a strict society where order must be maintained for the nation to function, literature must both delight and indoctrinate. If we think about it, our literature does that too. When we have Hamlet as a tragedy, we learn that being indecisive is wrong. I'm not saying that is the point of the play, but that is something we absorb from reading it, and being able to make quick and effective decisions is seen as a positive trait in the western world. When we read Romeo and Juliet, we learn that giving ourselves to infatuation is a negative thing. Literature is a teaching tool, for both humans and Cardassian. If Cardassians are a reflection of a fascist, xenophobic, strict classist society, those are the values it will teach, both in content and form. A culture that values following rules, order and being effective, will judge literature following precisely those values. Caesar is an ineffective leader because he doesn't realize Brutus's betrayal. Why would a piece of literature portray how not to be a leader? Why would a book show that killing a superior is acceptable? I can imagine the culture shock.

And about that line, the fault is not on our stars but in ourselves, well, Garak may be a Cardassian, but he is the most sentimental Cardassian we have ever met. He says so all the time, his family chastises him for it at every step. Somehow I feel sure that Garak understands human literature a bit all too well. Unacceptable of a Cardassian.

Thanks for coming to my TED Talk.

Okay so I was watching a compilation of Garak and Julian discussing literature to help me figure out Garak and Julian's personal taste and interests and:

Garak is so bad at literary analysis. What the fuck, man.

The fact that he's bad at literary analysis tells me that (duh) Garak literally does not view books or literature the same way a human would- he doesn't seem like he has any meaningful suspension of disbelief. But also he views the actions of the character as what makes the story good, not the story itself or the writing. Like... if he read Hamlet, he'd think that Hamlet is just a complete idiot and completely miss the rest of the story and meaning. He's very focused on the protagonist's effectiveness, which is not really how I typically think of a "good" or "bad" book. Like, Hamlet is a very good play with a very ineffective lead.*

It seems like he's (and Cardassians in general) attracted to stories where you always know the ending. I wonder how much of that is a comfort thing, you're never concerned about the ending of a Cardassian novel because everyone who is accused is always guilty and the repetitive epic always repeats. This makes me wonder... how much of that attraction to extremely predictable stories comes from the fact that their lives can be so unpredictable. In a world where you live in a fascist police state, maybe there is something actually comforting about always knowing exactly what is happening.

(*Though- I can't tell how much of this is just to annoy Julian because he's clearly able to understand the meaning of the "fault in our stars" quote that he yells at Tain later)

#star trek #garak #ds9 #bashir and garak's literature club #did I go insane?

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