#don't look into that tag

[edotfightme]

I was someone's sexual awakening

Can I tell you guys about that time I was someone's sexual awakening? Yes? Cool.

So it was a couple of years ago in this highschool drama group I was in. We were doing this play that nobody wanted to do but was dragged into it by the director because he'd done it before. I won't go into the details of the play or that year because it sucked. Maybe another time.

Anyway, I had this friend in the troupe named Autumn (not her real name). She got along well with my other friends and we were a good mini group in the troupe.

So one day we're rehearsing this scene called "the breakup". Basically the scene starts with Girl and Boy. Girl and Boy approach each other from either side of the stage, all lovey dovey. Then they come in for a kiss. Once that happens, they split apart as Boy mimes to Girl that they have to break up and then Boy leaves sadly while Girl is in tears.

Normally, my friend plays Boy and Autumn plays Girl. However, that day my friend was sick and any other boys in the troupe were needed elsewhere. This left me, someone who looked similar enough to my friend, to stage kiss Autumn.

A stage kiss works where Person A has her back to the audience while Person B has his back to the stage background. They lean in and tilt their heads as if they were kissing but they aren't.

Now, I hadn't exactly watched my friend and Autumn run the scene before but I knew how to stage kiss and I wanted my brief subbing to be good. So when I walked onto that stage I was as realistic as I knew how.

Keep in mind I learnt everything from Ao3 and roleplaying online so I had never dated before this.

I was keeping my eyes as soft as I could, and I walked slowly. I have no idea what Autumn saw but I do remember her surprise when it came to the kiss.

I pulled her in close and held a hand gently to her cheek, tilting it towards me as I twisted us into position. Then I swept in. I'll admit, I was pretty quick with how I moved. When I stopped, our noses were touching. I was internally cringing because of how awkward I felt I was being but Autumn's face and ears were bright red and her eyes were literally like saucers.

We completed the scene as normal, with my final sad look as my parting gift before I slipped into the wings and rushed backstage.

Everyone (because pretty much everyone crowds into the wings to watch rehearsals) then proceeded to say "I thought you were actually going to kiss her!"

Then Autumn, still red, confirmed that she thought the same. And then she proceeded to put the final nail in my proverbial coffin by telling me "[friend] never went in that close before and I thought you were actually going to kiss me!"

When I asked friend later, apparently they stay pretty far apart and don't really touch.

If Autumn had leaned into that one, we'd have actually kissed.

So at the end of that day, Autumn couldn't look me in the eyes, I couldn't look Autumn in the eyes (shame) and a few years later I found out that she came out.

I have no proof that I was the one that kick started that. I haven't talked to her in a while. But you know what, maybe I was. Maybe that was the inciting moment.

And I'm fucking proud of myself for it.

TLDR: I rizzed my friend with a fake kiss and now she's gay.

[peggycatrerr]

today on the train home the guy next to me was on his phone and at one point i saw him go on tumblr and he just had like. a normie dash. like it was all photography. of nature and architecture. he was using tumblr the way a heterosexual landscaper for rich people might use instagram. i actually had to watch his screen for a few seconds to be sure it really was tumblr because i was so taken aback by the content he was viewing. this is why algorithmless websites are so beautiful btw because i genuinely didn't know that this side of tumblr even existed. he didn't even so much as scroll past any text posts.

EDIT: look i'm not going to turn off reblogs but i cannot stress enough that THIS WASN'T A HIPSTER BLOG DASH IT WASN'T AN AESTHETIC BLOG DASH IT WAS THE MOST WILDLY GENERIC COLLECTION OF IMAGES YOU HAVE EVER SEEN IN YOUR LIFE. I AM NOT EXAGGERATING OR BEING A QUIRKY FANDOM TUMBLRINA WHEN I SAY "NORMIE" I GENUINELY MEAN "SO NORMAL THAT IT CIRCLES AROUND TO WEIRD". CAN ANYBODY HEAR ME? HELLO?

[beebfreeb]

Louisiana Meshi!!!! Thistle will be at the crawfish boil.

[sparrowlucero]

The greatest injustice ever faced is that I almost certainly started the still thriving "clown husbandry" tag on here, but any discussion about it (from a know your meme page to a youtube video with 500k views) says it's a joke of "unknown origin" or credited to this post, likely bouncing off of mine (which was actively circulating at the time with like 30k notes):

This is a tragedy for many reasons, most of all because it wasn't just an offhand joke but actually a direct response to some of the funniest online hate I ever got:

They're erasing the truest history of tumblr: its desperate need to seethe and argue over every obvious joke with more than 10 notes.

anyways here is the canonical pet clown. according to me

[tossawary]

This is petty fandom salt, BUT... I've been chewing on this phenomenon that I've been calling "Fandom's Darling". It is related to things like "Author's Darling" and "Mary Sue / Gary Stu" and "Protagonist Halo" and all that jazz, where one character gains a peculiar narrative weight in a story.

"Author's Darling" is when a writer has a favorite character, and the world and all other characters sort of get... warped to put the Darling in the spotlight. It's most noticeable in TV shows with multiple writers, when a character you personally like suddenly has their previous characterization destroyed to make another character look good somehow. Every other character might become weirdly incompetent. The Darling's feelings are treated as The Most Important Feelings in any given situation. The logic of the fictional world seems broken past suspension of disbelief in order to validate this one character's beliefs or skillset or some other fantasy. And so on.

"Fandom's Darling" is what I've been calling the pattern where a fandom essentially crowns a New Protagonist for their fanfiction stories (it's often a side character rather than the original protagonist, but it can also happen to protagonists). This character becomes the self-insert for all sorts of indulgent fantasies, gaining special powers or backstories, and/or becoming the focus of extreme whump, and/or hooking up with all the various hotties, starring in all sorts of tropey AUs, and so on. They're not always an obvious Mary Sue version of themselves, but the character's original personality and interpersonal relationships tend to get warped or dropped completely, and other characters tend to become a little flat around them. I call it "Fandom's Darling" because it's not just one self-indulgent fantasy fic (you do you! Have fun!) with characterization choices that I don't vibe with (I have neither the time nor the desire nor the authority to police anything, I am just venting), but rather a prolific mini-fandom of sorts revolving around this empty doll / fanon version of the chosen vessel character, so it becomes a little unavoidable.

I am salty about this (mildly frustrated) (imagine a soft sigh of disappointment before I just go do something else) because you are FUCKED if you actually liked the canonical version of this character and their interpersonal relationships. It's almost worse than liking an obscure character that no one cares about. There's about a thousand fics starring your fave, but maybe only about a dozen of them are actually rooted in any kind of recognisable canon.

[secretly-a-trekkie]

gimme 5 seasons of murder mysteries in coruscant rn Disney. or else.

[excali8ur]

When you meet your past lives but they're all ignoring you and freaking out over this one guy?

I've seen a few versions of this floating around with the different Leos and I wanted to have a go at doing one for Mikey. They're all collectively realising what a bus sized bullet they dodged by not ending up as messed up as Ronin

[forgettable-au]

PROLOGUE

FORGETTABLE-AU (Page 1-9)

AND SO IT BEGINS!

[CONTINUE] [MASTERPOST]

[manhattan-gamestop]

Out of curiosity rb and put in the tags how many fics come up when you type your last name into ao3. Apparently even though my last name is uncommon there's like 500

[coddda]

I wish we could have met in some other way.

Lawlight Week Day 2: Soulmates

If you saw me repost and re-edit this several times uh No you didn't </3

Still frames/Individual gifs:

If you know what every frame is from you get a free cookie. by the way

[arttuff]

i redrew an old anim i did of some guys taking a post-patrol nap

dickie is gonna get in trouble for wearing boots on the antique chaise lounge. no one tell alfred

[cj-the-random-artist]

Ok hear me out: Narilamb but they're both aroace and in a qpr.

I've been rolling around in my head for like a long long time this idea that Narinder and Lambert could both be aroace and (after like. A couple of centuries or so) end up in this like very comfortable very close relationship that neither of them define as anything specific other than calling it a "companionship". But on the other hand most of the cult thinks that they're dating in secret or something despite the fact that both of them have said they don't take lovers, because they are clearly very tight but maybe not super openly so, so maybe the cultists thing they're being secretive and hiding something or something like that. Idk but my aroace brain loves thinking about extremely close (mostly) platonic relationships and for some reason my brain decided hmm. I'm going to take this and throw it at Narilamb and see how I like it.

So then I decided to make a ridiculous joke comic about Narinder asking Lambert's hand in marriage specifically because he wants to get out of paying taxes. Because like, I know that spouse followers do actually still have to pay taxes in the actual game but. Hey Narinder and Lambert have presumably never married so they probably don't know that...? Honestly the only reason I made this was because the concept tickled me and I spent too much time on this for no one to see it, so. This comic and all it's absolute ridiculousness be upon ye.

While there's a tiny part of me that's been thinking about making this into an AU (which I'd probably call something like the "Strictly Platonic AU" or something), I know for a fact that I would blatantly not do anything legitimate with it so. It's an unofficial AU I guess?? But. Anyways. I thought this would be funny. Enjoy my ramblings and I hope you enjoy this thing that I spent. Actual time on. Lol

[writeouswriter]

People sorting ao3 solely by stats and only clicking on fics with a certain amount of kudos or comments, you will not survive the winter, nor the summer, nor at all, *brings out knife,* run

[eggdrawsthings]

a duet in a galaxy far, far away

[pearlore]

@eydilily 's gempearl designs r so gorgeous i had to draw........ also a swap?? ft. some nzsl bc i was briefly possessed by the spirit of. hands.

[buckleydiazmp4]

rat…ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷ