#don’t worry they call in Rex and Cody and demand they kidnap the cursed ones

[padawansuggest]

Obi-Wan: *gently massaging Anakin’s wittle palms while talking about the importance of proper hand care and why little padawans shouldn’t bathe in motor oil before beddy-byes* -and that’s the seventeenth reason you are the bane of my existence, yes yes, you cause Master soooo much stress! Naughty!

Anakin: *happy purrs and cuddles*

Entire Jedi Council: …

Mace: I swear to god Kenobi, if you don’t stop babytalking that twenty-five year old man-

Yoda: Familiar, this situation is…

Plo: *amused* Yes, I seem to remember Qui-Gon acting much the same way when Obi-Wan was this age.

Mace: *throwing a balled up flimsi at Obi-Wan’s head* force, stop that! It’s giving me force-hives! Padme won’t stop messaging me asking where her husband is, send him home already!

Obi-Wan: Hmmm… kick me off the council and I’ll stop bothering you with it.

Mace: Done.

Yoda: Not your decision alone, that is.

Mace: *hissing* you old troll either they go or I do but I’m not dealing with their codependent bullshit today, I’ve already encountered four shatterpoints while his antichrist children were in my presence today, I’m done here, I’m just so done.

Anakin: *falling asleep half in Obi-Wan’s lap* Just tell Leia to stop it. She doesn’t give me visions if I don’t bother her.

Mace: …did you just imply she can /stop/ force visions with her abilities???

Yaddle: what the fuck…

Yoda: Delightfully terrifying, she is!

Mace: That’s it, I quit, I’m retiring, I’m not dealing with this-

Anakin: Awwww, you can’t retire, Luke likes you.

Mace: He gives me anxiety! He always has a bunch of shatterpoint bubbles floating around him!

Anakin: Alright, how did you get over Obi-Wan’s weird force bubbles when he was tiny and constantly looking for you because babies love their finders?

Mace: I spontaneously learned teleportation one year. And forgot how to do it when the panic died down.

Anakin: There’s the trick, then.

Mace: I hate it here.

Yoda: Love Jedi, I do!