#doesn't it bother you more when they have the capacity for greatness and choose to do worse

[asocial-skye]

look i was raised hindu, and maybe it was obvious since so many of our stories involve people like this, but it's so weird that people get mad that abusive characters in fiction are also given redeeming qualities, and those redeeming qualities are elaborated upon in context of the person.

'it's abuse apologia-' no it isn't. it's about realizing that abusers aren't mustache-twirling villains, and how no amount of talent, skill and kindness you might have will ever excuse your harm. abusers are people; dehumanizing bad people and making them into caricatures ignores the reality that horrible people can and do lead lives that are upstanding in many ways.

[inconspicious-random-thoughts]

Your idea of all soul contracts being voided is very interesting and something I've also played around with/considered. It's a major systemic issue that makes life in Hell extremely difficult for those without power (which is most). If Charlie truly wanted to improve life for all sinners, including those who don't want to be redeemed, targeting that system of ownership would be key and I think it'd be a great progression for her character/mission. If Heaven won't play by their own rules, then give Hell the overhaul it needs that improves life for everyone and remove the possibility of soul ownership completely.

I do want to say, with regards to Valentino's behavior, I personally see him showing restraint in some circumstances. Yes, he SAID he wanted to go and shoot up the hotel but after his initial tantrum with the model, he just sat in his room patiently waiting for Vox. I think there is potential to reason with him, but it'd have to be through someone he trusted (Vox and/or maybe Velvette) AND he'd have to be calmed down first to help him move past the pull to impulsivity. He was also able to rein it in pretty well with Charlie even when she was bafooning it up in his studio, on his turf... I just think it would be fascinating to explore the Vees as potential forces/influences of change and how Charlie could incorporate them into her plan. You'd likely have to get them battered down enough to even be willing to negotiate, but end of the day they are business people and I think they can be reasoned with. Even just within exploration of the adult content industry... turnover is extremely high. Maybe Vox/Velvette could be shown the numbers dipping on Angel Dust's popularity and it would then be their job to convince Valentino to drop him. For them, it's money but maybe for Valentino it's power and then that can be explored in their respective character arcs (ie. WHY does Valentino want that power/what is he gaining from it)? There are so many interesting ways you can play with these themes/characters that isn't a boring "Valentino gets stabbed to death" plot point.

So, I really hope the show chooses the more complex exploration of these characters (and gives consideration to their respective backgrounds that may be influencing their decision-making) rather than reducing them to boring cartoon villains (I also hope to GOD they don't betray each other, I love that they have their own little family among the three of them).

Let us see Charlie trying to win them over to her cause. Let us see Charlie challenged with the idea that some people like the life they've made in Hell/don't want Heaven as endgame BUT that doesn't mean they can't improve their practices or help make life in Hell better for all. There's a lot of potential. I think it also really reinforces the main theme that everyone is capable of change.

This is all personal preference/morality, but for me I truly believe that everyone has the capacity to grow. Yes this includes Valentino. If there is "no hope" for some people and no one bothers to reach out because they're deemed irredeemable, then what incentive is there for them to ever get better? Why shouldn't they just become a worse and worse version of themself then, potentially victimizing and harming more people along the way? Approaching Charlie's school of thought where everyone can be redeemed with a plan that focuses on rehabilitating individuals (and breaking down what that means/how that varies person-to-person) is a natural next step. Understanding why someone like Valentino is the way he is, how the system of Hell has contributed to the problem on a societal level, and what tools he should be given to cope/make better decisions in the future WHILE also protecting his victims from additional harm are all critical steps that I think Charlie (and the show) need to start taking more seriously... if their plan is to really explore this idea of redemption, anyway. This would also apply to characters like Sir Pentious and Angel Dust. Everyone is in Hell for a reason, everyone has a past and a laundry list of wrong that needs to be addressed and given care. How many lives did Angel Dust ruin as a mobster? What had Sir Pentious even done prior to his stay in the hotel that landed him in Hell in the first place?

So much potential in all these characters. I really hope the writers really flesh them out. Sorry for going on too long at the end there, your comments just got me thinking.

Your idea of all soul contracts being voided is very interesting and something I've also played around with/considered. It's a major systemic issue that makes life in Hell extremely difficult for those without power (which is most). If Charlie truly wanted to improve life for all sinners, including those who don't want to be redeemed, targeting that system of ownership would be key and I think it'd be a great progression for her character/mission. If Heaven won't play by their own rules, then give Hell the overhaul it needs that improves life for everyone and remove the possibility of soul ownership completely.

Exactly. It is a huge systemic issue and if the show been greenlighted multiple season ahead of time, I'm sure there be an a subplot about it. As it something Charlie see how the contracts affect her people greatly and it would be a project she take on to change it. It's a huge undertaking as is basically restructuring the government that been running on the principle for multiple thousands of years. It's just how things are and she wants to change that.

The contracts originally was about a weaker demon seeking out the protection of a stronger demon to keep them safe from the rest of Hell in exchange of servitude. After several thousand years it evolves and got a bit more corrupted but the bases of it still exist. But the protection became more the overlord defending their territory/property.

Obviously the overlords are the ones that will suffer for it, despite it making things harder to the owned souls to exist in Hell and possibly unfair how they obtain it, (But also keep in mind, the deal was consented by both parties, both agreed.) it is unfair to the overlords when it just the the way things are and no warning of a sudden structural change. They are being punished/losing for playing the long game well while playing by the rules of Hell at the time. They were winning at a game and then the host decided it time to change the rules.

The overlords will:

1) lose their compensation after they held up their end of the deal.

2) lose a large if not all chuck of their power and status.

3) most importantly they will become targets after they were forced to give up their power and their numbers that would have defended them. Lets face it, once contracts get voided and overlords losing their power and status, a bulk of sinner will want to retaliate. Attack the overlord that held them or attack another overlord that they felt wrong them and now have the opportunity to do so when they are not overpowered.

This doesn't only effect the big honcho overlords we seen, there be smaller ones...mobs and gangs and what not. But considering the majority of characters we meet are overlords it would be interesting to see how they deal with this as an audience. Probably an overlord meeting about it if they got intel what was being plan and trying to derail it from happening, or a civil war among the overlords on the approach how to deal with it.

If there is a civil war about it, the overlords who still be upset but willing to work with Charlie/Lucifer would be Carmilla, Zestial, Rosie. They just generally to care about Hell and probably treat their souls fairly well. Rosie probably be least affected by it all. She owns souls, but I think her souls will still follow and look upon as a leader even after they been freed, and cannibal town will more or less run the same as it was before. Carmilla and Zestial would probably have a similar situation.

Unname overlord may be included in this.

The Vees will obvious be against it, and Zeezi might be on the undecided side but more on keeping things the way things are. She doesn't seem like she be an overlord to give up her wants and needs in favor for a better society if it can be avoided it.

Alastor will play double agent im sure. He always have like 3 hidden agendas he working at the same time that are his own her other peoples he force to follow. He be annoyed he lose his souls but then again, he would have his own freedom again.

The best possible solution I can think to fixing the infractractor to what Charlie wants, is to wean out the contracts. Creating a clean slate immediately would be problematic. Have the contracts expired in a decade. AND/OR if new contracts can still be made, have there be term limits. A soul can only be bind to a contract for X amount of years then it can be renegotiated or let it null and void. It be a hassle for the overlords for sure as the constantly, and make extra effort on treating souls better for the soul to want to remain under contract/protected while the other try to earn that spot. Possibly a guideline has to be drawn up to have a basic math for length of servitude. If the overlord provide x to the demon, the demon would serve x amount of years.

One thing I wonder is do overlords provide housing and such as part of their protection? Most sinners don't really seem to have jobs to afford housing and food. Most of the sinners we see are working in the guidelines of their contract. So how are they getting money for things? Is being provided with the necessities part of the protection?

But we have to keep in mind, we see how much the people regret their decision on selling their souls. It seem, like most if not all the people who sold their soul regret it. Its nearly common knowledge that its a bad deal to do it...yet...people still do it. They choose to go along and do it regardless thinking they were the special exception. So yes, they are a victim...but at the same time...are they?

I don't think the regret would not be an all time if its limited to a certain amount of years. That if it something they did regret, at least it there's a light at the end of the tunnel and not just a bleak all of eternity experience. Terms limits would at least have both parties put effort into the relationship if they are satisfied with the deal. Both parties have to put effort to want the other to stay in.

Not saying this can be the endgame solution but it can be a start down that path.

I do want to say, with regards to Valentino's behavior, I personally see him showing restraint in some circumstances. Yes, he SAID he wanted to go and shoot up the hotel but after his initial tantrum with the model, he just sat in his room patiently waiting for Vox. I think there is potential to reason with him, but it'd have to be through someone he trusted (Vox and/or maybe Velvette) AND he'd have to be calmed down first to help him move past the pull to impulsivity. He was also able to rein it in pretty well with Charlie even when she was bafooning it up in his studio, on his turf...

You have a point there. Valentino is a violently impulsive but your right, there was some points he did not act out immediately the way he wanted. He had his hissy fit and tore up a model before he sulked waiting for Vox advice. But I did forgot about Val calming down slightly and waiting for Vox. I also forgot about episode 4 completely. Honestly, it makes his character better that he able to reign in some of that impulsive violent nature. It would make the lost of Angel dust contract better. Im sure Val would trash the room the moment he lost is but after thrashing about to calm down he just be seething without acting out on it. Which...I sort of want to see now. I'm sure there still need to put precautions about Val retaliating. Val would want revenge even if he lost the contract fairly. Val would want to send a message hes not someone to fuck with but perhaps he won't actually act upon it like he would want to. At least wouldn't be a blind tantrum rampaging retaliation if he did act out a little.

I just think it would be fascinating to explore the Vees as potential forces/influences of change and how Charlie could incorporate them into her plan. You'd likely have to get them battered down enough to even be willing to negotiate, but end of the day they are business people and I think they can be reasoned with.

True, very true. Vox and Velvette are fairly level headed people. Well, except about Vox isn't when it comes to Alastor.

Which makes me wonder...

If Vox losing his shit about Alastor

Val losing it about Angel

Who makes Velvette lose her shit about? Can't wait for that character to be introduced.

Even just within exploration of the adult content industry... turnover is extremely high. Maybe Vox/Velvette could be shown the numbers dipping on Angel Dust's popularity and it would then be their job to convince Valentino to drop him. For them, it's money but maybe for Valentino it's power and then that can be explored in their respective character arcs (ie. WHY does Valentino want that power/what is he gaining from it)? There are so many interesting ways you can play with these themes/characters that isn't a boring "Valentino gets stabbed to death" plot point.

That would be actually pretty interesting to see. Angel losing popularity. Probably caused by his stay at the hotel. Having the other Vees try to talk Val on not using Angel so much with them going by the numbers and trending.

Actually, Angel being in the hotel might making him almost an embarrassing cringe meme at some point and Velvette and Vox trying to talk Val not using Angel so tarnish their brand. Because they want to be trending in a good way. I don't think Val wouldn't give up the contract because I think Val really likes having Angel around for himself even if Angel not a big income anymore. Maybe Angel becoming a joke and not a money maker Val would hesitantly accept an offer for Angel soul if the payout was big enough.

Even if it not dramatic, I kind of want this play out now. It like the safest and agreeable way to end the terms without much fear of retaliation.

I think it be really sweet way to play out. The hotel residence, and Cherri if she hasn't joined, chip in with everything they have to buy Angel freedom. Lucifer, Charlie and Alastor able to contribute more and possible offer something with more weight like a restricted favor at a given time. Angel would be so grateful and feel so love that everyone did it, that if they felt like a family to him before it only furthered it. It also open up to some Angel angst if favors were offered and the Val request wasn't agreeable to the one giving the favor but has to serve out anyways. Angel would feel so much guilt over it.

So, I really hope the show chooses the more complex exploration of these characters (and gives consideration to their respective backgrounds that may be influencing their decision-making) rather than reducing them to boring cartoon villains

I am a huuuuuge sucker for backstory and character growth. I love character growth. Even if they don't grow, I like how we eventually learn of their back stories to understand why they are the way they are. Make you sympathise with them even if you don't agree with their methods.

I hate black and white/ right and wrong anything..I love how everything grey and having that explored. I mean, the vast majority of people are not evil or good for the sheer sake of it. It usually stems from something that propels people in that direction.

My favorite trope is a villian is sort of in the right in their own way but they went about it wrong. Basically the ends justify the means.

(I also hope to GOD they don't betray each other, I love that they have their own little family among the three of them).

That....never crossed my mind. I would feel so betrayed myself if that would happen. I love their little family. But if one would betray, its Velvette. But it better not happen. They need to stick together! Even if I suspect Velvette be the one out of the three to betray, I doubt she will. Phone Case as evidence. Vox and Val phone case is their own personal brand symbols while Valvette is about all three of them. She probably the biggest heart of all of them and makes them stick together.

Let us see Charlie trying to win them over to her cause. Let us see Charlie challenged with the idea that some people like the life they've made in Hell/don't want Heaven as endgame BUT that doesn't mean they can't improve their practices or help make life in Hell better for all. There's a lot of potential. I think it also really reinforces the main theme that everyone is capable of change.

I been thinking about this exact thing SO MUCH lately. I wanted to make a post about it but didn't end up doing it.

Like, Alastor is a prime example of this. He doesn't want redemption. Giving the life he had, he probably never felt so freeing until he landed in Hell. In life people scampered away or looked away in disgust and hatred because of his heritage, he was taken advantage because of heritage and social standing. He had to hide his identity behind radio to be able to converse freely without judgement and treated equal. The activities he enjoy he had to keep secret. But in Hell? people scamper away out of fear of his power, he can indulge in all his deplorable actives he enjoy. He can force people to listen to him. Hell was freeing for him. It's everything he needs and wants aside not being with his mother. He doesn't want redemption. He doesn't want to give up his fun and entertainment. He doesn't want to give up his power and status. It's Hell, hes going to have his bad days especially with his shackles but overall how he going to enjoy heaven for eternity if he bloodthirsty and enjoys annoying people without receive retaliation?

Even if he makes it to heaven...it be similar to his life on Earth. His power would be equal or lower of the residence of Heaven. They will learn how heinous he once was. They will be disgusted by him and move to the other side of the street to avoid him. He be happy to see his mother...but can he really bring himself to her after...everything? Her having the knowledge of everything because word would get around. She may work past it, but Alastor would feel that her eyes won't look at him the same way as it once before. It pains him greatly. It pains his mother having that knowledge. Heaven not suppose to hurt. He can't have the both of them suffer like that. It's best that she remains in the dark of his deeds because whatever worst case scenario she can dream up about her sweet little boy it wrist slap compared what he actually committed.

He doesn't want redemption...

...but it doesn't mean he can be rehabilitated which I think has already starting to happen. He curb his activities for the image of for the hotel. He hides his particular diet from their eyes to not disgust them. He still gets to indulge and commit murders but now its more reserved for the defence of the hotel and its residents. He always had his own moral code when it came to his murders. But it seem like he hasn't "hunted" since he been at the hotel because he didn't want it getting back to Charlie and disappoint her or ruin the hotel image IMO. So, I think we already seeing Alastor being slowly rehabilitated without him or anyone realizing it. The longer he there the more he going to feel fond with the other residence and continue to change some of his habits for their benefit.

This is all personal preference/morality, but for me I truly believe that everyone has the capacity to grow. Yes this includes Valentino. If there is "no hope" for some people and no one bothers to reach out because they're deemed irredeemable, then what incentive is there for them to ever get better? Why shouldn't they just become a worse and worse version of themself then, potentially victimizing and harming more people along the way? Approaching Charlie's school of thought where everyone can be redeemed with a plan that focuses on rehabilitating individuals (and breaking down what that means/how that varies person-to-person) is a natural next step. Understanding why someone like Valentino is the way he is, how the system of Hell has contributed to the problem on a societal level, and what tools he should be given to cope/make better decisions in the future WHILE also protecting his victims from additional harm are all critical steps that I think Charlie (and the show) need to start taking more seriously... if their plan is to really explore this idea of redemption,

I agree. For Charlie to really move forward with her redemption she needs to start trying to get to the root of the problems. Trust falls isn't going to be the answer. I think she been hesitate because she doesn't want to push boundaries which is a good thing and to extent is working. They feel safe and relatively there's trust and strong bonds....but at the same time...its not solving much either. But progress is progress I suppose no matter what speed.

What had Sir Pentious even done prior to his stay in the hotel that landed him in Hell in the first place?\

Seriously, What did he do?! He such a cinnamon roll.

So much potential in all these characters. I really hope the writers really flesh them out.

There is a lot of potential and I think that what make this show fun! We only know so much about them so it really fun trying to fill in the blanks and figure out their motives. I don't think any of them are meant to be 2 dimensional or plot devices but have several layers. That even the seemingly simplistic character will have complexity. I just hope the show keeps getting renewed so we can be offered everything the creator wanted to give.

Sorry for going on too long at the end there, your comments just got me thinking.

It's okay. It's a delight to know that my rambling can do that. That they might inspire or help someone get creative about the fandom. I only made this blog to just get ideas out of my head of what I'm hyper fixated on which is currently, Hazbin. I didn't really expected anyone would actually read it much less, like or interact with it. I just find it surprising when it happens but brings me joy that my words and thoughts seem to have some meaning to someone.

[wanderinginksplot]

On Asexuality as a LGBTQIA+ Identity

I just read a lengthy and disheartening post about the inclusion of asexual and aromantic people in the LGBT (et al.) community, especially about how many people don't believe it is acceptable. The main argument seems to be that aces aren't discriminated against and that they don't share the same experiences as the rest of the LGBT spectrum.

This may be a strange way to explain this point, but you know in Stranger Things season three, when Will wants to play DnD, but Mike and Lucas are worried about their girlfriends?

Will gets frustrated about the four of them not spending time together any more. Mike says something to the effect of, "Did you think we were just going to sit in my basement and play games forever?" And a broken-hearted Will just says, "Yes, I did." (S3, E3; 19:20 - 22:15)

That scene broke my heart.

I know that face. I've made that face. I've made it every time someone told me that I didn't understand my friends ghosting me because I'm not in a relationship. Like romance was some magical state of mind that would reorder my priorities and make my friends' actions make sense in retrospect. (Exactly what Mike is doing in that specific scene, by the way.)

I'll get into specifics below, but long story short, I read that scene as Will being asexual. Even now, having watched season four, I still think Will might be ace, though everyone seems pretty determined that the character is written as being gay.

Now for the promised explanation (below the cut):

Growing up, I went from having several close friends to constantly given lower priority than the relationship of the week. It started in middle school, but continued throughout high school and even to this day. That always frustrated me.

To me, my friends were the most important people - why didn't they feel the same? We saw each other nearly every day for four years, but because they made out with someone a few times, it was worth leaving their friends behind. It sucked and I never understood why it bothered me so badly.

Fast forward to now. I've been out of high school for almost a decade. I'm coming to terms with the fact that I'm most likely ace, if not aro/ace. I understand why the behavior of my friends bothered me so badly: They were demonstrating over and over again that I was a lesser priority. Our friendship didn't matter as much as the early stages of their romantic relationship. Even our friendship of years was less important and less worthy of devoting time to than a romantic relationship.

And that's one of the most frustrating parts about being ace.

Now, obviously, it's not a competition. Being LGBTQIA+ in a non-ace capacity is hard. I am not doubting that in any sense. At all. But I will say that my father has assured me multiple times that he doesn't care if I'm gay, as long as I find someone. Anyone. Because that's the only way I'll be happy. And he's not the only one who's said that to me.

I can have friends. I can adopt children. I can have pets and a fulfilling job and a life that makes me happy, but if I choose not to have a romantic relationship, all of that is worthless. According to society, there is only one way to be happy: in a relationship.

We as a society are getting better about broadening definitions of relationships, thankfully. You can be just as fulfilled as a man in a relationship with a man, a woman with a woman, and infinite variations of those. Polyamory is even gaining more appreciation and recognition as a valid lifestyle! That's great! It's just frustrating that asexuality is the exception.

The point to all of this is that if I, an asexual person, can interpret a gay character as asexual because we share so many of the same experiences and struggles, it seems like we may have more in common than some people seem to think.

Thank you for your time.

[mbti-notes]

Anon wrote: Hi! First of all i want to thank to you for being a real and honest people. Nowadays, like all areas psychology has some popular social media personas which doesn't feel sincere and most importantly real. But your approach is admirable.

I'm an intj, 24, female. I'm not even sure asking such questions to you would be a good idea. But i thought "why not" so please excuse me if i'm wasting your time. It's a classical childhood trauma which it doesn't heal. I got bullied about my physical appearance several times when i was a child. I called ugly mostly and even a girl from my class told me that i should've work twice cause i'm ugly. Now it's all passed but the feeling it's still there.

Actually my real problem's about what's gonna happen if i have a relationship because no matter what i don't feel beautiful. Sometimes some of my friends or a guy who is trying to hit me calls me beautiful and thinks like that. But i feel like if i would accept that everyone would laugh at me. Everyone's lying cause i am ugly. That's the truth. Of course this isn't a healthy though i know but i can't get rid of that feeling no matter what i did. If i would turn into a super model nothing would change inside me so this proves that my thought's aren't healthy and something's wrong.

I only ask because I'm afraid if i would love someone in the future i couldn't have a healthy relationship. This really bothers me. Thanks for even my question was useless to ask to you and stole your precious time.

----------------------

1) I think you've made a great point about social media personas. The self-help business is big business because it speaks to people's deepest suffering. Unfortunately, it is easier to manipulate and exploit vulnerable people, so there are lots of charlatans out there looking to take advantage. That's why I avoid social media and always prefer to learn from the recognized experts in a field.

Nowadays, we are all flooded with so much information, so it's more important than ever to be careful about who you listen to and whether you're getting the right information, especially when it's about your psychological health and well-being. An important part of nurturing a healthy spirit is feeding it a healthy "diet" that promotes personal growth, which means avoiding people who would feed you false or biased information.

2) Bullying is defined as forceful behavior that serves the purpose of dominating or intimidating people. The experience of repetitive bullying is a recognized form of psychological trauma because it damages your sense of dignity, making you believe your existence is insignificant. A bully's greatest success is when you learn to bully yourself with their words. They don't even have to be present anymore because you're doing all their work for them through voluntarily putting yourself down and punching out your own spirit.

When you experience trauma as a child, you don't have the intellectual capacity to make sense of it, so it's as though your mind gets stuck in that period of time. As a result of not being able to move forward in psychological development, childhood victims of bullying are much more likely to suffer mental health issues like depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem as adults. They don't know how to escape the perspective of victim, often feeling fearful, helpless, powerless, or hopeless.

Children have the wonderful qualities of being open, sincere, and trusting because they need to learn about the world quickly. Thus, they easily believe everything they are told. But every coin has two sides. Being trusting makes them more susceptible to manipulation by irresponsible actors. You're 24 and still believe what you were told about your physical attractiveness as a child. As an adult, you should now have the intellectual capacity to think more critically about your beliefs and values. And you should be able to develop the independence of mind to choose beliefs and values that are more aligned with the truth.

You now see there is something wrong in your thinking because you've realized it didn't originate from you. Good. Are you capable of changing your thinking? INTJs tend to be intellectual creatures, so perhaps you should start by doing a careful examination and analysis of the concept of beauty, to counter the beliefs your bullies instilled in you. E.g. What is beauty and how is it defined? What is the true purpose of labeling things "beautiful" or "ugly"? Who gets to define what is beautiful, and why? What are your beliefs about beauty and where did they come from? Do you need to change your beliefs to be better aligned with the truth? How would changing your beliefs also change your attitude and behavior?

3) Changing your ideas about beauty can help you be more rational in your judgments about it. However, this doesn't erase your memories of the past. Memories plague us because of their painful emotional content. When the emotional trauma is too intense, it is advisable to work in a safe environment with a therapist to guide you.

You shouldn't want to get rid of your memories because those experiences are necessary for your personal identity and psychological growth. You can learn to look upon past experiences differently, from a bigger perspective. Big picture thinking should come naturally to Ni doms. By making better sense of what happened and putting those experiences in the right perspective, you can eventually come to weaken or neutralize the negative emotions.

Imagine that you were walking down the street and you saw someone yelling at a small child, calling them "ugly" and all sorts of vulgar names. The child is crying quietly but cannot get away. Would your first instinct be to join the bully in berating the child? Or would you feel a strong desire to protect the child from harm? If you have any humanity, you would not hesitate to conclude that treating the child this way is morally wrong and should be stopped as soon as possible. If you had the capacity to stop the bully and speak to the child, what would you say to them? How would you help them?

Now, imagine that the child is you. Do you believe that you deserved the bullying? Do you believe that your bully cared about you and was telling the truth about you, or were they just trying to destroy your dignity and dominate you for their own purposes?

To put traumatic childhood experiences in the right perspective, you have to be able to transcend the perspective of the innocent child and adopt the vantage point of a wiser adult. Instead of looking upon the situation through the eyes of the helpless victim you were then, you can now look upon it as someone with the power to help and stop the victimization. Look upon that child with empathy and compassion, and you may start to see how beautiful the child actually is and how much they deserve to be loved after what they've been through.

Being granted the strengths of Te-Fi, healthy TJs are generally fearless and formidable people. They don't fear making mistakes, because they are confident in their ability to recover and learn from them. They don't succumb to control, because they form their own beliefs and do what they want. They don't need to be told what is right, because they follow their own moral code. They don't wait around for a hero, because they know how to be their own hero. This power already lies within you, but you have to change your perspective on yourself in order to release it.

[morgana-ren]

What are some things that Ilya is willing to compromise on if his darling is able to convey that she’s hurting because of him (obviously) but also stopping his own chance for happiness?

Well, there's a lot to try and compromise on. There's his obvious sadism, but truthfully, that will (sort of) decline with time-- insofar as that he won't seriously hurt you for his own amusement. Not like he's stabbing you in the gut or anything, but uh-- you know.

Horrible things get him off, same as most of the lads. He doesn't care much for consent or boundaries. He enjoys crying and begging. He wants to be the one in power and is willing to do terrible things to keep that power. He likes bruises and blood and all sorts of degenerate shit. But same as with Nighty and Reaves and the rest of the lads, the more he cares, the softer he becomes. Horrid shit still gets him off, yes, but there will be a little more give and take.

Ilya is fully willing and capable of giving pleasure -- more so than Nighty, actually -- and you'll notice a difference. He won't do it just to fuck with you. He will do it because he wants to.

The biggest issue is his emotional unavailability, honestly. Even more than his sadism.

Ilya is cold, cool, and calculated. He was raised very differently, and even his ideas of ideal love are challenged in his own mind. It's remarkably hard for him to be available in any capacity that would be expected from an actual lover. He never had a good frame of reference. He watched his mama play his father like a puppet on a string. He watched his father be distant and cold to all his children and wives. He has nothing good to draw on when it comes to love.

He's never been emotionally vulnerable before. He's never shown that he cared or put himself in a position where he might be rejected. He took what he wanted and walked away when he didn't anymore.

When you choose to be with him, no matter how you may have started, you'll notice that he's quite.. distant. He always has this aura of aloofness. It might've been a relief at first, but when you're trying to break through to him? Not so great. His demeanor is always very chilled, and calm, and almost creepy. No matter how upset you might get, he's just going to blink snake-like eyes at you slowly, and occasionally give you an absolutely infuriating small smile. He will shrug you off while lounging in a chair like the king of fucking England, and it will feel like you are talking to a pretty wall.

The hard part is he does love, and he can care so much. But he literally has no idea how to show it. He is the literal emotional embodiment of a shrug and a chuckle.

When he thinks he's losing you, he will simply coil tighter around you. Remember, leaving isn't an option. His first line of thought isn't 'Oh hells, I'm doing something wrong.' It's 'They aren't going anywhere.'

But if you level with him and tell him that this (being his invulnerability, and not just his presence) is hurting you, it's going to... confuse him. He literally won't realize what he's doing or what is happening.

Ilya has... issues. He has anger issues, abandonment issues, basically there's a list. How he copes with those issues is by keeping a tyrannical rein-in on his emotions. What that means is no vulnerability. No shows of love outside of small, distant gestures like gifts, nothing real. Because if it's real, he has to work at it. Because if it's real, that means he can lose it.

Look, he's a broken basketcase to be sure. But with a lot of patience (and I do mean a lot of patience) you can make him realize that if he wants a real love, he has to fucking earn that by being in a real love. He can't separate himself from it and still have what he wants. Even if you ignore it and pretend it doesn't bother you, he's eventually going to catch on that something isn't right.

I hate to say it, but basically, he is going to have to be fixed, and even then, he is still going to be busted as fuck. You can take his hand and lead him through it, if you know how to. You're going to have to make him understand that he cannot have the benefits of vulnerability without being vulnerable. If he wants love and a family, he has to let his guard down. He has to be willing to grieve, and hurt, and feel.

And feeling is what he avoids most in the world. Even when he is feeling.

[kennyparrots]

The African Grey Parrot Makes a Superb Pet

African Dark parrots have many charming characteristics and parrot sweethearts will observe that an African Dim Parrot is one of the most straightforward parrots to keep as a pet. Not just that, the African parrot is an extremely famous pet parrot for some reasons. Their uncommon talking and mental capacities implies that they connect well with their proprietors and are a delight to have as a most loved pet.

Since time is running short, these parrots will foster an enormous jargon and it has been accounted for that they discuss well with their proprietors whenever given the motivation.

What does an African Dim parrot resemble?

Buy african grey parrot it is a medium measured parrot of around 10 to 14 inches which likewise makes him an ideal pet since he is not difficult to house and to deal with. Of course, the male is bigger than the female, yet all at once just barely.

Albeit practically the same apparently, there are two distinct kinds of African Dim. One is the Congo African Dim which has a light dark body tone, exceptionally light dim to white on the head and with a splendid red tail. The other is the Timneh African Dim with hazier dim quills on top, light dark chest and with a maroon shaded tail. The general body work of both of these parrots is a lot of something similar with the two genders, yet the female will in general have a marginally smaller head and a more thin neck than the male.

Not shocking when you consider the life expectancy of different parrots, the African Dark has a long life expectancy so a proprietor should can make a drawn out obligation to the parrot when they choose to take one on as a pet. They can satisfy 60 years which is very astonishing when you consider the typical family pet.

Keeping your African Dark solid and cheerful.

This parrot has an exceptionally high knowledge which truly intends that in the event that not kept entertained they will become exhausted and this isn't great for his general prosperity. An exhausted parrot will foster a few vices and rapidly as well, which could be difficult to switch. A few signs to search for to check whether he is exhausted are:

- Feather picking

- Testy and antagonistic

- Gnawing

- Self-mangling

According to the pet parrot's perspective, one of the propensities that will cause him hurt is that of plume picking. Assuming you at any point notice your parrot taking out feathers move on to this issue straight away on the grounds that it isn't great for him to have uncovered patches where he has culled out his quills.

Another issue is that they can turn out to be exceptionally cranky assuming they are exhausted and this will make him a disagreeable companion. He will probably begin gnawing and be very awful to people around him. On the off chance that truly bothered, he will even self-disfigure.

Very much like any shrewd creature a pet parrot needs communication with its proprietor consistently and needs excitement to keep it blissful. This doesn't imply that you should play with it for hours daily, yet your pet likes to have a specific measure of opportunity and play with its proprietor.

The African Dim do prepare flawlessly so partake simultaneously and show him a few deceives that he will cherish doing and individuals will cherish doing with him. Likewise hang some toys in his enclosure so he can play with them when he is all alone.

Be 'one of the herd' to your parrot.

Right at home, the African Dim would fly in a group so they truly do will generally regard their proprietor as one of the herd. Due to this the parrot will frequently appreciate having the side of his head scoured and somewhat of a scratch there as well, yet he won't partake in his body being taken care of. You will frequently see with a gathering of parrots that they will more often than not kiss around one another's head. It is a propensity for parrots.

Assuming you have your pet parrot around your face really do be mindful so as not to let it 'kiss' you around the mouth (and they love to do this) since people can move microscopic organisms from their mouth to the bird which isn't sound.

In the event that being kept by a family, kids need to comprehend the character of a parrot since, supposing that they really do get nibbled, it harms as the parrot's nose is exceptionally hard and sharp and is intended for opening seeds and nuts. On the off chance that a youngster disturbs a parrot they could get chomped, even by a serene parrot.

African Dark parrots will engage for quite a long time, yet provided that they are painstakingly cared for with the right eating regimen, social necessities and lodging. Appreciate helping them to talk and watch them play out the stunts that you show them and they, at the end of the day, will do assuming you give them the toys to play with.

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[chinsy32]

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The Same Thrill 바카라사이트

Online roulette offers the entirety of the tomfoolery and energy of a gambling club game without the bother of going to one. Comforts like these couldn't possibly be more significant nowadays. That is the reason this present time is as fine an opportunity as any to possibly find any way to improve on your internet based roulette abilities.

Numerous club across the world are returning their entryways subsequent to being compelled to close because of the pandemic . In any case, this doesn't imply that anybody can feel quiet getting back to them, so playing these games online can be gainful. You could think roulette on a site is abnormal. In any case, after you've seen a couple of virtual flips, you'll understand that is indistinguishable from what you'll find in a genuine club.

There may not be an actual wheel, yet the excitement of seeing where the ball lands is as yet present. It's additionally really smart to see how the various types of roulette fluctuate from each other. At the point when you peruse the web for rules, you'll see that they shift from one webpage to another. You'll likewise see that the sheets and wheels are planned in an unexpected way.

Wagering

Individuals ought not wager on virtual monetary standards since it is difficult to watch the movement without the stakes. Assuming you really want to know roulette strategies for online club, you should initially guarantee that the game you are going to start is beneficial.

Recollect that not all that you find is engaging on the web or should be sought after. While certain sites can make you cash, it is ideal to be doubtful when something is by all accounts unrealistic.

The Details

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Investigate the accompanying subtleties to get familiar with playing on the web roulette:

Be careful while choosing an internet based gambling club

Gambling club locales endeavor to draw in numerous clients by offering inviting motivating forces. While looking for a trustworthy internet based gambling club to play roulette, restricted your degree. Gambling clubs that have been in activity for quite a while are bound to be above board. You ought to abstain from visiting betting pages with remarkable claims that aren't settled or those with negative appraisals. And still, after all that, it is smarter to accept your impulses rather than different sources and perspectives.

Look at the chances, payouts, and math

Each roulette game, regardless of whether on the web or disconnected, is based on insights and likelihood math. Various wagers have different payouts, and there is regularly an association between the likely result and the gamble taken. Understanding the game's chances and result design will go far toward helping you in settling on an educated decision while playing on the web roulette.

Pick a betting arrangement that suits you

Do some schoolwork prior to picking a gambling club setting, however from that point onward, you just get familiar with a couple of hypothetical deceives that could possibly work. Most players win or bomb in view of their capacity to master new abilities to hold their bankroll and objectives in line. Assuming you've understood tips and deceives, pick those that are long haul and have a superior opportunity of profits, not right away but rather over the long run. Put the wagering framework under a magnifying glass. On various sites, you can play roulette games.

Roulette

Be adaptable

You could go over a fascinating game after a great deal of investigation and feel totally calm playing it. In any case, it isn't prudent to restrict yourself to just one game. With the bait of prizes for your cash spent, games like web-based roulette can exceptionally engage. Remember while playing that you should get when it is suitable to leave the game.

Exploit your leisure time and take advantage of it by participating in web-based roulette.

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[pogueman]

The New Samsung Galaxy does 28 things the iPhone doesn't

The Samsung Galaxy S8 (and the larger S8+) give you more screen in less phone. (Image: B. Gaskin)

Every spring, Samsung introduces a new Galaxy phone; every fall, Apple (AAPL) counterpunches with a new iPhone.

At the moment, we find ourselves in mid-cycle: Samsung has just released its Galaxy S8, and the iPhone 8 is still a summer away.

The S8 is a gorgeous phone. It’s a hardware masterpiece, it’s getting rave reviews, and—hey!—so far, nobody’s battery has exploded.

It’s also so crammed with features, it’s amazing the thing doesn’t weigh 20 pounds. That’s the Samsung way: Pile on features to see what sticks. Unfortunately, some of it’s garbage.

So here, as a public service, is a peculiar kind of review: A master list of features that the new Samsung has and the iPhone doesn’t—along with an assessment of which ones are actually useful.

1. The wraparound screen

Samsung’s S8 design goal was, “the most screen in the smallest space.” And sure enough: the side margins of the screen are gone completely—the screen image actually begins to curve around the side edges—and the top and bottom margins have been halved.

The result: Samsung’s screen shows 40% more than the iPhone 7’s—but the phones are the same width. (The screen is 5.8 inches diagonal on the S8, vs. 4.7 on the iPhone.)

That’s a little misleading, of course—the Samsung gets some of that extra screen area by being taller than the iPhone (.4 inches taller). In other words, it’s a weird shape—tall and skinny—that leaves you with black bars beside your videos.

Here’s what else is misleading: Samsung advertises a resolution of 2960 by 1440 pixels—much higher than the iPhone’s 1334 by 750. But in hopes of saving battery life, Samsung hides much of that high-res goodness. Out of the box, the phone comes set to 1080p resolution—only one-quarter of its potential sharpness. You have to fiddle with Settings if you want all the clarity you paid for.

But no question: it’s great to have so much screen. And such a great screen! Bright, colorful, gorgeous OLED.

Usefulness grade: A

2. Edge display

On the right edge, you can set up something called the Edge display. It’s a vertical bar, hugging the curved edge, that you can swipe inward to reveal a skinny pane of icons. You choose which icons appear here—favorite apps, speed-dial icons for your friends, news, and so on. Because this bar is available from within any app, it’s like an ever-present dock. Once you try it, you’ll use it constantly. It spares you all the trips to the Home screens. It’s really great.

This skinny bar at the edge of the screen gives you instant access to favorite apps and people.

Usefulness: A+

3. Video enhancer

The S8’s Video Enhancer mode gooses the contrast and brightness in video apps like Netflix (NFLX) and YouTube (GOOG, GOOGL). Honestly? Without seeing two S8’s side-by-side, it’s hard to see a difference. (It comes turned off, because it’s a battery drainer.)

Usefulness: B+

4. Gigabit LTE

The S8 and S8+ are the first phones that can tap into Gigabit LTE—a cellular network that’s supposed to give you much faster internet speeds.

It probably won’t affect you. Only T-Mobile (TMUS) has started upgrading its network to Gigabit LTE, and only in 300 towns. Sprint (S), Verizon (VZ), and AT&T (T) say they’re working on it.

(Gigabit LTE isn’t the same thing—nor as fast—as 5G, which will take a few more years to arrive.)

Usefulness: B

5. Iris recognition

You can now unlock your S8 by gazing into its camera lens; it recognizes the irises of your eyes, even if you have glasses on.

Most people don’t wind up using this feature, though, because it requires that you bring the phone up to eye level and hold it about 10 inches from your face; it’s just goofy and awkward. It also doesn’t work in bright sunlight.

Unlocking the phone with your irises is awkward, but handy when you have gloves on.

Unfortunately, the alternative secure unlocking method—your fingerprint—is a total disaster. Samsung put the fingerprint scanner on the back of the phone, directly beside the camera, so you get finger grease on the lens every time you unlock it. (The phone even warns you as much: “Be careful not to smudge the camera lens,” it says when you set up your fingerprints.)

That’s if you can unlock it—the scanner is a tall rectangle (not a circle, as on the iPhone), and you have to cover the entire thing to make it work. A design disaster all the way around.

Usefulness: C

6. Face recognition

The Galaxy can also unlock itself by recognizing your face. It’s fast, and doesn’t involve holding the phone like you’re trying to mind-meld with it.

Unfortunately, face recognition is neither reliable (it often doesn’t work) nor secure; for example, Samsung doesn’t consider it secure enough to use for Samsung Pay. People report being able to fool it with a photo.

You can’t use both iris and face recognition; you must choose one or the other.

Usefulness: B

7. Longer battery lifetime

Samsung says that the new S8 battery will last longer—not in hours per charge, but in overall lifetime of usefulness. After a year, the battery will maintain 95% of its charging capacity—up from 80%, on the Galaxy S7.

There’s no way to test Samsung’s claim without waiting a year or two, so we’ll have to take their word for it.

Usefulness: B+

8. Portrait mode

The S8’s main camera hasn’t been improved since the S7 came along—it’s a wicked great camera—but its software has.

For example, when you’re photographing a face, you can turn on a Portrait mode, which simulates the blurry-background effect you usually see only in pro photos.

This is not an optical effect; it’s basically a filter, and the phone sometimes gets it wrong. The blurring sometimes spills into your person. (On the iPhone 7 Plus, the similar Portrait feature relies on the phone’s two camera lenses, and is therefore more reliable.)

What’s cool, though, is that you can adjust the blur after shooting the picture. You can even blur the foreground, leaving the background sharp.

The S8’s blurring feature can soften focus of either the background or foreground, although the results can look phony.

Usefulness: B+

9. Snapchat-style overlays

The Camera app can now add goofy, Snapchat-style animated costumes to your head. They’re pretty awful. Stick to Snapchat (SNAP) or MSQRD.

Usefulness: D

10. “Virtual” photos

Within the Camera app, there’s a new option: You can walk around an object, “filming” it. Later, you can “play it back” by swiveling the phone around in space, changing your angle on the subject. Convenient if you’re shopping for sculptures, I guess.

The Camera app is full of tricks, like Snapchat-style video overlays (left) and 3-D walkarounds of objects (right).

Usefulness: C

11. HDR certified

The S8 is the first smartphone with an HDR-compatible screen. That’s high dynamic range, and it means that, if you can find an HDR movie to watch, you’ll see it with more vivid colors and a greater range of brights to darks.

So far, there’s not much to watch. Netlix’s HDR movies don’t yet play on the S8 (and would require a more expensive streaming plan if they did). Amazon Prime’s HDR movies do, but there are only a handful of them.

Usefulness: D

12. Enhanced front-facing camera

The camera above the screen now captures 8-megapixel photos with an f/1.7 lens, and can autofocus now. Good stuff, though not an earth-shattering improvement over the iPhone 7’s front camera (7 megapixels, f/2.2 aperture).

Usefulness: B

13. Bluetooth 5

Bluetooth 5 has four times the range and twice the data rates of Bluetooth 4—but you get those benefits only if you’ve upgraded your Bluetooth stuff (speakers, Fitbits, headphones, etc.) to Bluetooth 5 gear.

Even now, though, the S8 lets you pair with two existing Bluetooth headphones, so you and a friend can listen simultaneously.

Usefulness: B+

14. Split screen

The S8 introduces “multi window,” a feature that lets you split the screen between two apps, side-by-side (or top-and-bottom). At that point, you can adjust their relative sizes, or copy between them.

Two apps, one screen.

It’s slick, but getting there takes some learning—and, unfortunately, it’s available only in some apps.

Usefulness: B–

15. Bixby voice control

Bixby is Samsung’s version of Siri or Google Assistant. It’s so important, it gets its own dedicated button on the left edge of the phone—which you can’t reassign to another function.

Which is too bad, because at the moment, Bixby doesn’t do anything. It doesn’t take spoken questions, like Siri or Assistant does. Samsung says that’s coming soon. (Meanwhile, you can always use Google Assistant, which is still there.)

Samsung says that once Bixby is activated, it’ll be much smarter than Siri or Assistant—that you’ll be able to give it far more complex commands. For example, if you’re looking at a map, you can say, “Capture this and send it to mom.”

Samsung also says, though, that apps must be rewritten to respond to Bixby commands—and only 10 apps will be controllable in this way when Bixby goes live.

Usefulness: Unknown

16. Bixby Home

A second feature, confusingly also called Bixby, is a nearly perfect copycat of Google Now: A scrolling list of “cards” that present information you might find useful right now, based on the time and your location: weather, appointments, headlines. Why is it necessary for a phone to have two copies of the same thing?

Bixby Home is a fairly pointless duplicate of Google Now.

That’s always been a downside of Samsung’s phones, which already come with two photo apps, two web browsers, and so on. Why bother duplicating Google’s good work?

Usefulness: D

17. Bixby Vision

Yes, there’s a third feature called Bixby. This one is built into the Camera app. You can point the phone at a landmark and see details about it, supplied by Foursquare; at a product to get shopping information, supplied by Amazon (AMZN); at any image to be shown similar ones, from Pinterest; at a wine-bottle label for ratings and details, from Vivino; or at foreign-language writing for a translation, supplied by Google Translate.

The best feature of the long-dead Amazon Fire phone lives on.

Last week, Google announced that the same feature is coming to Android. So once again, you’ll have two identical versions of the same feature.

Usefuness: B

18. Samsung Health

This new, surprisingly complete app automatically tracks your steps, workouts, and (if you have a Samsung smartwatch that you wear at night) sleep; it also offers places to manually record your weight, food, blood glucose, water, caffeine, and so on.

In a novel twist, the app also lets you have an instant video conference with an actual, board-certified doctor for $60 (courtesy of American Well), which your insurance may or may not cover—great for getting immediate help or refilling a prescription.

Usefulness: A–, if you’re into that sort of thing

19. Dex Station

For $150, you can buy a special dock that lets you connect your phone to a big monitor, mouse, and keyboard. Your phone becomes the CPU of a PC!

The long-dead Motorola Atrix lives on in the Dex.

Unfortunately, many apps don’t work right on the big screen, and there’s the whole question of, “Why?”

Usefulness: C

Older Features

Many of Galaxy’s features aren’t new in the S8, but are still unmatched by the iPhone. A few examples:

20. Cool gestures

The Galaxy phone is the shortcut lover’s idea of heaven. You can turn on all kinds of super cool gesture-based shortcuts, like these:

Swipe the fingerprint reader to open Notifications

Smart Stay (the screen stays on as long as you’re looking at it)

Press the Power button twice to fire up the camera

Wipe the edge of your hand across the screen to take a screenshot (which you can then annotate or crop)

Direct Call (hold the phone to ear to auto-dial the person whose card is on screen)

Smart Alert (when you pick up the phone, it vibrates if notifications are waiting)

Easy Mute (silence the ringer by placing the phone face down—in a meeting, say)

Send an SOS to designated contacts (press the Power button three times)

Answer a call by pressing the Volume Up key

During video playback, drag up/down for volume adjustments, left/right for brightness. Double-tap to pause.

These gestures erase a lot of the fussiness of trying to get things done on a tiny, no-mouse device.

Usefulness: A+

21. Quicker charging

The S8’s quick-charging technology (unchanged since last year’s model) gives you a full charge in about 1.5 hours, as long as the screen isn’t on. That’s about half the time of an iPhone 7 Plus.

Usefulness: A+

22. “Wireless” pad charger

You can charge your S8 by setting it onto a Qi charging pad (under $15). It takes twice as long to charge that way, but saves you the plugging and unplugging of a cable. Grab and go.

Rumor has it that the iPhone 8 will offer “wireless” charging, too.

Usefulness: A

23. Samsung Pay

Loop Pay was a phone dongle that could trick a credit-card reader into thinking that you’d actually swiped a card through it. In 2015, Samsung bought Loop and built its technology into its Galaxy phones.

(Here’s my review.)

It’s hard to believe. You wave the phone near the card-reader slot, up to a couple of inches away, and — beep! — you’ve just paid.

This is nothing like Apple Pay and Android Pay, which work only at checkout terminals that have been upgraded to work with them. In the big picture, there just aren’t very many places to use Apple Pay and Android Pay.

But Samsung Pay works almost everywhere that fine credit cards are swiped—90% of all checkout counters.

Usefulness: A

24. Always-on screen

The phone’s screen never goes fully dark. When it’s “asleep,” you still see the current time, battery charge, and notification summaries.

The S8’s screen is almost never fully dark.

“Won’t that eat the battery up?” Yes, a few percent; you can turn the feature off if you like. But it’s kind of handy, especially if you use your phone as a watch.

Usefulness: A

25. Smart Unlock

This is an Android feature, not a Samsung feature, but it’s cool: You can set things up so that as long as the phone is in a certain place (like your home), within range of a certain Bluetooth device (like your Fitbit [FIT]), or on your person (based on your body motion), it won’t keep locking. You won’t need a password, fingerprint, or whatever to unlock it.

Obviously, you won’t turn this on if you work at, you know, the NSA. But when you’re alone at home, why shouldn’t you enjoy a little convenience?

Usefulness: A

26. Headphone jack

Yep. Samsung managed to create a waterproof phone without sacrificing the headphone jack. So much for Apple’s “courage.”

Usefulness: A

27. Expansion slot

You can outfit your S8 with a tiny micro SD card for additional storage—lucky, since there’s only one S8 model (with 64 gigs of memory). The memory-card thing isn’t quite as good as built-in storage, because the phone treats it as an external drive, and it’s up to you to manage which data and apps get stored in which place, and some apps can’t be on the card. But for photo and video storage—awesome.

Usefulness: A–

The counterpunch

Of course, the iPhone has a long list of its own exclusives, like stereo speakers, a pressure-sensitive screen (press harder for more options), an optical zoom on the camera (on the Plus), built-in storage options up to 256 gigabytes, and twice the storage (128 gb) for the same price.

Above all, there’s the software—iOS 10—and the Apple ecosystem. Apple’s gotten more feature-happy of late, but it’s still the world leader in simplicity and coherence. You would never catch Apple bloating up your screens with duplicate apps and junkware. Apple’s apps are far more consistent in design and operation. You’ve got the Apple Stores to visit for on-the-spot fixes and help. You’ve got the glorious flexibility of sending iMessages instead of short, limited texts.

And then there’s the tight integration between Macs and iPhones. You know: Copy some text on your phone, paste it one second later on your laptop. Read a web article on the subway on your phone, sit down at your Mac at home to see the same site. That kind of thing.

In a way, then, all of these comparison articles (including this one) are missing a key point. They’re interesting for monitoring the state of the art, but they shouldn’t be called, “Which one should you buy?” Moving from the Apple ecosystem to the Google/Samsung ecosystem, or vice versa is a big, expensive hassle that not many people undertake. You have to re-buy all your apps. You have to buy all new chargers. You have to do a lot of relearning.

But clearly, the Galaxy S8’s hardware is a beast. A huge leap beyond the iPhone 7. So the ultimate experience would be the hardware features of the Galaxy S8, running the software and ecosystem of the iPhone.

Well, who knows? If the rumors are right, we’ll be getting something like that in the iPhone 8.

More from David Pogue:

Inside the World’s Greatest Scavenger Hunt: Part 1    •  Part 2   •   Part 3  •  Part 4  •  Part 5

The most important announcements from Google’s big developer’s conference

Google Home’s mastermind has no intention of losing to Amazon

Now I get it: Ransomware

Google exec explains how Google Assistant just got smarter

Amazon’s Alexa calling is like a Jetsons version of the home phone

David Pogue, tech columnist for Yahoo Finance, welcomes nontoxic comments in the comments section below. On the web, he’s davidpogue.com. On Twitter, he’s @pogue. On email, he’s poguester@yahoo.com. You can read all his articles here, or you can sign up to get his columns by email.