#doesn’t need to stop all socialisation skill training

[rowanthestrange]

one minute of silly puppy playing with and teething on his nylabone, to the background restaurant noise of a silent travelvlogger (to get him used to the television and different kinds of ambient sounds).

[aristia-pjoheadcanons]

Cabin 5 / Ares Cabin PJO Headcanons

Random thoughts. Kind of bored of not seeing any head-canons for this cabin.

Battle cry/war cry. Like their father Ares who screamed so loud on the battle field that even his worst enemies and allies shivered in fear, they can do something pretty similar in the span of the moment. But doing so takes a great deal of energy and exhausts them. Doesn’t usually happen, since it’s uncommon but it happens the more often you participate in war.

Some Cabin of Ares get along with many of the people in camp, after Clarisse decided to stop bullying people after the first book.

They’re able to understand which moves to make that will give them idealistic results: victory. But some of it can be reckless and they’re not able to think critically about the after effects or what will happen to the people around them if they do.

Cabin if Ares kids have this aura around them that scream power if messed with. It’s not as strong as the children of Poseidon, but it’s more like: mess with me and you’ll wish you could see your mothers face before you die. Similar effects can be found with the Children of Athena.

Most of the kids felt awkward giving food or other offerings to their father at first, since he was a pretty passive and cold parent. But Ares actually sits around and looks forward to seeing their faces and hearing their voices when they offer something in the bonfire during dinner time.

Ares’ favourite thing to do is to watch them fight during a battle, he loves to see what moves they can come up with and see them develop their own unique fighting style.

Many of the kids in the cabin felt insecure about fighting or sparring. The pressure that weighed on their shoulders to be a “master of all weapons” or a “war god” was a heavy burden. Occasionally, they would freeze up if too many people were watching them.

Many people do enjoy watching them spar, since the other cabins do learn a lot from them.

They’re surprisingly good teachers, since they criticise without caring if they hurt another persons feelings. They give good advice if their form, what weapons to use based on what makes them comfortable, power class and sometimes weight. They’re able to give constructive criticism that many people look forwards too, even people in the cabin of Athena look forward to it.

(Annabeth actually only started to improve once she watched some of the kids of Ares spar, since they fight so brutally. Her sparring with Luke inky taught her technique, not aggressiveness and brute force that you sometimes need to win a fight. Luke was good at beating around the bush, or dancing around his opponent to look for an opening to do a great deal of damage— but the children of ares find the most efficient way without feeling much tired).

Many people look up to them since they’re good at wielding all weapons without any proper training, but that doesn’t mean they get lazy. They’re one of the cabins that practice for the longest sometimes skipping dinner—until Chiron told them to stop making that habit, since it would be rude not to thank their father for such skills. (Also, socialising is good).

Many of these kids don’t actually enjoy military training that they got to go through when they finished summer camp. It’s pretty much a pain in the ass. But even so, they’re now good at using camouflage and tactical weapons, and even waiting for their opponent to let their guards down before striking.

They all have this things where if they feel extremely intense emotions during certain things, others in the room will also feel the intensity of it. The problem is that they could make glass shatter if it gets under control.

Sleep with the windows open, and they don’t have any curtains in their cabin. They don’t decorate the inside, but made sure to decorate the outside.

They actually started putting barbed wire on the roof because Hermes and Apollo cabin pranked them by making a bunch of birds shit in their roof - since cabin 5 were such jerks all the time. And they put the wire up to scare away birds.

Dogs are actually scared of some of the kids in cabin 5, no one knows why but I guess the vibes they give off are sometimes a bit too intense for certain animals.

Artemis and Ares are actually get along, not necessarily best friends but they do have respect for one another for wanting to protect young girls.

If any, and I mean ANY of his kids get kidnapped, abducted or even hurt badly— Ares will come in full battle armour ready to save them. He does get scolded by other Gods for ‘meddling in and sticking his nose in mortal business’ but he can’t help it.

Children of Ares often have the feeling to protect people around them, even if they don’t know them at all. During a problematic situation, they take the lead to get people to safety or even scouting out the area since their instincts and nerves never calm down during a potential fight if threat. They have this constant feeling of needing to be in control, to the point where they can even obsess over it.

Panic attacks are actually not as common as you think. Since they’re pretty good at handling their emotions if their own, in contrast to what people think of them as, they can actually be one of the calmest of the whole entire camp. To the point where it’s kind of creepy of freakishly calm they are during crazy things.

They zone out a lot and daydream because of the constant need ti escape since many of them are reckless during quests, their way of soothing themselves after a long day of a day off is to just stare off into space. Some friends from other cabins have ti drag them outside, so they don’t stay cooped up in their beds too long.

They love to play games like UNO, War (personal favourite) Pig and so on, but they absolutely suck at poker since you need a proper strategy to actually have a chance at that game. But they can make it pretty far if they are determined enough. However manny of them find it boring since it isn’t intense enough.

Thats all for tonight folks. I’ll make more head-canons tomorrow.

[fruit-salad-ship]

Holy shit Val

Like. Everything in the body language says intensely loyal and protective, but when you actually zoom in on her expression she looks concerned and reluctant and maybe tired and just. Holy shit I don't even care about Peach in the villain au tell me about Val!!!

Val in the Villain AU would have a totally different outcome to canon Val.

She has always been driven to achieve, she’s a go-getter by nature, but believes she can do it regardless of evolution, which she has proven in canon. Because of this she’s confident, brave and sure footed, willing to protect her trainer, and the team with everything she’s got. The traditional vulpix trait of fleeing when confronted was snuffed out a long time ago by her own ego. Peach has always encouraged her to use her psychic skill sets more than the fire, because fire causes great destruction, it kills everything it touches, be it a living creature or the environment it spreads through. Peach encouraged precision and control, and while Val will use fire moves, she evaluates if it’s safe to do so first, only resorting to them when need be.

Villain Val however did not receive support to be who she wanted to be, she was trained ruthlessly, to a point of extreme power sure, but it had its drawbacks. Villain peach took after her mother, and instead of grass types, settled firmly in the fire type category. Val has not bonded to others, or been socialised, so her skittish nature has been highlighted. She will dart around instead of hold her ground. Her psychic skills are few and far between, she has no mental connection to peach, and no defensive skill set. She’s all power and aggression, no tactics.

Her family don’t support the idea of letting Pokemon choose their fate, they had previously tried to evolve Val before peach left for the rangers, and Val resisted on several occasions. She would have been broken in to get to evolve, if not, she’d have been used as fodder for something bigger and stronger. Seeing her options, Val would have accepted evolution as her only viable choice, and stopped fighting the stones that were pushed on her. Her confidence would be forever knocked, her trainer would grow distant and cold, slowly becoming more mentally unstable, and so she would too. That energy peach has reflects in her team, but psychic types pick up on it more. Canon Val is strong because she’s had support, and her trainer is solid and believes in her. Villain Val does not have that at all, and peach being a wildcard makes her one too.

She’s afraid of failure, and nervous about what’ll happen if she doesn’t tow the line. She’s hyper aggressive towards the other Pokemon in villain peach’s team, not only because the family have raised her that way, but somewhat because if the others fail too, they’ll be thrown to the wolves. She doesn’t want that fate for them.

[anna-pixie]

padawan -> obi-wan kenobi {part one}

              ─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

me: has a witcher series to finish which is taking a lot of time

also me: starts a new series about a character i’ve never written for before!

{also trying out a new layout? unsure of what i think of it}

summary: you’re hopelessly in love with anakin skywalker, but he only has eyes for padmé amidala. your heartbreak is starting to effect your performance in the jedi temple, and your position as padawan to obi-wan kenobi is in jeopardy.

pairings: obi-wan kenobi x reader {eventually}

warnings: none

               ─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

         ╔═══*.·:·.☽✧   ��✦    ✧☾.·:·.*═══╗

Your face is blank as you watch Anakin from across the room, something you’ve learnt to do from many, many months of suppressing your emotions. Though your face no longer betrays you, the way your heart swells at the sight of his smiling face reminds you of your ever present love for the fiery Jedi.

Your warmth stutters, however, when a hand is placed on his shoulder, and Senator Amidala appears from behind him with a smile full of sunshine and grace. You can’t help but slightly purse your lips as Anakin’s whole body reacts to her touch, as though she is a magnet and he is made out of pure iron.

Anakin, whilst being a great Jedi and an exceptional pilot, is not as skilled at masking his emotions. Despite it technically still being a secret, you’re sure that everyone knows of his love for and marriage to the gleeful senator. It was like a punch in the gut when you had found out about their nuptials. You and Anakin had been close friends for years, your friendship was one of those will-they, won’t-they friendships, full of flirty banter and sexual tension. You had liked it that way, you were content that way. Until the day he arrived with the joyful news that he had settled down with Padmé. That was the day that your friendship changed forever, he withdrew from you, became more distant and treated you the way a Master would treat a Padawan - holding you at arms length as though you had never been close in the first place.

It suffices to say that you’re heartbroken, and you wake up every day just as heartbroken as the last. It’s a horrible cycle that has had devastating effects on your training. You’re unfocused, unwilling to put in any extra effort, unwilling to socialise the way you used to because everywhere you go, the two of them are there, as in love as the day they wed.

“Credit for your thoughts?” The melodious voice of Obi-Wan Kenobi floods your ears as he settles himself beside you on the black lounger.

 “I’d like to think my thoughts are worth more than a singular credit, Master.” You joke, leaping to your usual defence mechanism of humor to deflect from the obvious sadness radiating from you. You’ve never met anyone as perceptive to the force as Obi-Wan, both a blessing due to his vast knowledge, but also a curse, due to the fact you can never quite hide your emotions from the Jedi Master.

You had trained under Obi-Wan at the same time as Anakin, however your recent slip ups had meant that while Anakin was promoted to the rank of Jedi Knight, you still remained a Padawan under the guidance of Obi-Wan.

 “Of course, my Padawan, I apologize,” Humor laces his tone, before he turns to face you completely, his expression more serious as he holds eye contact with you, “I do require a serious conversation with you, Y/N, about your recent performance as my Padawan. Please join me in my quarters for a drink of tea. Be there around 7. Enjoy the rest of your day, young one.”

You watch with a fond smile as the older Jedi makes his leave from the bustling room, his robes swishing behind him as he goes. Truth be told, you had harboured a crush on your Master when you first began to train under him. The first few times you met him were spent with longing gazes and a lot of lip biting on your end, but eventually your attention was captured by the flirty, playful nature of Anakin. You wonder how things would’ve turned out if your focus had stayed on the older Jedi master, you know he is very set in his ways, but you wonder if maybe something would have bloomed between the two of you. You can imagine Obi-Wan to be a very gentle lover, in all aspects, the complete antithesis to the damned Skywalker boy you had fallen for.

With a shake of your head, you banish all thoughts of romance from your mind. You’re training to become a full fledged Jedi, attachments are not allowed. That doesn’t mean other things aren’t allowed, that stupid voice in your head reminds you. No, you won’t let yourself think about such things.

              ─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Your head is hanging low as you stroll slowly through the hallway of the Jedi temple, on your way back to your residence after a long day of not really listening to the things the council had been droning on about. You can tell that people are starting to notice your wavering commitment to the cause, however you honestly cannot bring yourself to care.

 A shriek escapes your mouth as a hard body barrels into your own, almost sending you to the ground had it not been for your quick reflexes summoning the force to keep your body upright. A smile forms on your lips as you hear the tell tale chuckles of Anakin, who seems to have quickly ran out from behind one of the pillars without first checking for passers-by.

“Y/N.” He breaths, an apologetic smile on his face as he gathers himself, brushing his chin length hair back into place, “Sorry about that.” His voice is sheepish and he scratches the back of his head.

 “Don’t worry about it, Ani, walk with me?” You throw out, averting your eyes as you nervously await his response. You don’t know why you even asked, you haven’t been alone with him for a while, he’ll definitely say n-

“Sure. You going back to the residences?” You nod at his question, too shocked by his agreement to form words at the moment. He sends you another smile as you start your trek back to your quarters, your legs moving of their own accord whilst your mind takes a moment to catch up with the current situation. You curse your heart for the way it swells instantly with happiness at the presence of Anakin, simply walking beside him, barely feeling the warmth of him under his robes, makes all the feelings you try so hard to suppress return to the surface.

A noise from behind grabs your attention, and the two of you turn your heads, only to be met with the sight of a giggling Padmé trying to sneak out from behind the same pillar Anakin came from. The familiar sadness hits you like a tidal wave as you face forwards once more, just catching the fond smile on Anakin’s face as he looks back at his wife. The fleeting happiness you get when you’re around him is not worth the floods of sadness that always follow, you think, as the two of you walk silently towards your residences.

“I haven’t seen much of you lately, Y/N. No one has, actually. I know Obi-Wan has been worried about you.” He speaks casually, his tone so breezy that it sounds as if your welfare never even crossed his mind. Obi-Wan is worried about you, fine. But is Anakin? He’s the source of all your pain to begin with.

 “That’s nice of him.” You muse, not even glancing in his direction as you continue walking, hoping that your upbeat tone is enough to quell any curiosity he may have. However, it is not, and you’re stopped when he tugs at your elbow, gripping onto it with a slightly lax grip as he narrows his eyes at you.

 “Seriously, Y/N, what on Tatooine is going on with you?.” His tone is firmer now, and your skin is heating at the feeling of his hand on the bare skin of your arm. You try to find your words as you gaze into his eyes and you quickly realise that you need to get yourself together, lest you want him to feel your true emotions through the force.

“Absolutely nothing.” A tight smile pulls across your lips and you wrench your elbow out of his grip, leaving him standing outside the temple with his suspicious gaze trained on your retreating figure.

 By the time you return to your room, you only have an hour or so before you’re due to meet Obi-Wan for tea. You decide that you must do some meditation before you face your Master, knowing that his concern for your wellbeing will make him more perceptive when he analyses you.

You find brief tranquility, thinking of the lush skies and soft greenery of your home planet Alderaan. It’s not long before your mind is bombarded with the images of what Anakin and Padmé must’ve been getting upto behind the pillar of the temple, stealing secret kisses and laughs because they love each other so much that they can’t possibly wait until they are in private to be together.

Jealousy rolls off you in waves, thinking about how you wish it was you that he was so desperate to kiss, so desperate to hold and be in your presence even though it is forbidden. Accepting the fact that Obi-Wan will be able to sense your negative emotions from a mile away, you begin to get ready to join him.

You’ve never been in a Master’s quarters before, so you’re unsure of whether your usual outfit is appropriate attire for the occasion. A simple tank top, usually a light colour, and matching tight pants, with a sheer sarong wrapped around your waist. Deciding that you doubt Obi-Wan will care what you’re wearing, you decide to forgo any changes. You fix your hair and look in the mirror with a frown as your thoughts take over once more.

What does Padmé have that you don’t? Is it her position in the senate? Her maturity? Her outgoing personality? You had tried to be more like her, more vocal and social in your day to day life, but by nature you are cripplingly shy, so that failed miserably.

               ─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“Come in, Padawan.” Your Master’s voice sounds from behind the large white door, and you wait patiently as it slides open for you at his command. He is still wearing his robes from the day, you note, as he pours two small cups of herbal tea at the small table next to his kitchenette.

All the Jedi Masters have larger, more equipped residences than the Padawans, and usually make food and eat in their own quarters rather than in the mess hall like the rest of you.

You take a moment to look around Obi-Wan’s room whilst he is momentarily distracted making your drinks. It’s very...him. He seems to have chosen to forgo the harsh, overhead lighting that adorns the rest of the residences, instead having a few dim lamps dotted around that spread a low, moody hue around the room. It is relatively clean, his bed is made, scattered with many comfy looking blankets, yet every free surface seems to be covered by piles and piles of books. You can tell that most of them are old Jedi texts, and a smile tugs at your lips at the dedication of your Master.

 It’s strange to be in here, you feel like you’re completely surrounded by every aspect of him. You can see a spare change of robes hanging on the doors of his closet, probably ready to be worn tomorrow, and the door of his fresher is slightly ajar, allowing you to peek inside if you wish to. There is a dirty plate next to his sink, he must have just finished eating before you arrived, not having time to clean the dish properly. Seeing his room like this, he seems so human to you all of a sudden. He seems so… familiar to you.

“You’re a curious one, aren’t you?” His voice is amused, and you turn to face him with a blush. He is sitting down now, in one of the chairs that surrounds the tiny table, opposite another one for you to sit on. You mumble an apology and make your way to the seat, awkwardly perching yourself on the edge of it.

 “I like your room, Master Kenobi, it’s very… homely.” He smiles at your admission and gestures to your tea before taking a sip of his own.

“Thank you, Y/N. I like to have a place I enjoy spending time, I appreciate it when I return from long missions.” You hum at his response, letting out a pleased noise as you taste the tea he prepared. It is some sort of woodsy concoction, not what you’d usually go for, but it tastes like heaven on your tongue.

“So…” You clear your throat, the anticipation of this impending conversation almost killing you, “You wanted to talk to me, Master?”

“Ah yes, straight to it then?” He looks puzzled at first, as though he is unsure of how to approach the topic, before heaving a resigned sigh and placing his tea back onto the table with nary a drop spilt, “Y/N, you had so much potential. I chose you and Anakin to train under me because I saw something in the both of you. Anakin? He was hot headed, fueled by passion and rage and I thought it a good challenge to help him control it. You, on the other hand? You were quiet, reserved, overwhelmed by your shyness but absolutely simmering with potential. And we unlocked so much of it, did we not? You were excelling, even more so than Anakin. What happened, Y/N? You can’t expect me to believe that my best Padawan forgot everything she’d learnt overnight. No…” He leans forward now, not allowing your wide-eyed gaze to waver from his as he continues with his serious spiel, “You stopped trying, you gave up. I would like to know why, and you’re not leaving my quarters until you tell me. I’ve tried to be gentle with you, kind, but the council are threatening termination of your place in the Jedi temple.”

Silence descends on the tense room as your brain struggles to comprehend everything Obi-Wan just threw your way. Of course you knew the council weren’t happy with you, you’d seen the disapproving gazes from Mace Windu and Ki Adi-Mundi, but you never even considered it had reached the point that they were considering ending your training as a Jedi, and relieving you of your place in the temple.

The only sound that breaks the silence is your breathing getting quicker and quicker, until Obi-Wan realises he needs to try and calm you down. Your anxiety is so strong he feels as though it is hitting him, and he notices the way your eyes begin to well up, and you realise with a start that months and months of pent up emotions are making themselves known right now. Right here, in your Master’s quarters.

 Luckily, General Kenobi is a master at diffusing situations, and is quick to kneel in front of you, taking both of your hands in his and gazing up at you with those kind eyes of his.

“If nothing else, Y/N, a Padawan should be able to trust their Master. Can you trust me? Whatever the problem is, it will not leave this room. I give you my word.”

You know you shouldn’t tell him, for Jedi’s should not love, but you crumble the second his thumb brushes over the skin of your hand. At this moment, you want to be comforted, and not just by anyone, by Obi-Wan specifically.

“I love him, Obi-Wan. I love Anakin so much it hurts, but he doesn’t love me, he loves her.” You sob, tears spilling freely from your eyes as you avert them from his own. When you hesitantly look back towards him, you expect him to look shocked, angry, in disbelief. Rather, he just gives you a sad smile that conveys the fact that your admission was exactly what he had expected you to say to him.

Has Obi-Wan known about your feelings for Anakin this whole time?

        ╚═══*.·:·.☽✧    ✦    ✧☾.·:·.*═══╝

[woeismyhoe]

Rachel Amber, The Broken Angel Who Demonized Herself

Fair warning, please bear with this probably incredibly **longass** (I’m not kidding it’s rlly long) analysis of one of the fandom’s most controversial disliked characters, Rachel Amber. This is just my attempt to analyze her character based on observation from BtS to LiS so by no means do you have to accept them. Productive discussions are obviously very welcomed :D

In LiS, when we asked about Rachel around campus, most of them had nothing but compliments and praises for the missing girl. She was essentially an honorary Vortex Club member who socialised with the snobs, yet she also hung out with the skater stoners and was friendly with those at the bottom of the social hierarchy. Then we see those graffiti around where it hints at Rachel’s promiscuity, debts and conflicts with other people. That’s the first sign we see that Rachel Amber isn’t as perfect as everyone was making her out to be. Afterwards we discover that Rachel was a stoner herself and into whatever drugs there were, partied harder than anyone else, promiscuous, entered a relationship with local drug dealer Frank Bowers while having a secret relationship with Psycho teacher Mark Jefferson— all while maintaining a 4.0 GPA in her studies and being considered perfect and adored by practically everyone in her school. The girl’s incredible, obviously, or maybe scary for someone to be so spread out in everything.

Rachel was a straight A student with a 4.0 GPA, an administrative assistant to the Principal, beloved by students and faculty alike, literal goddess beauty, had ambitions to be a model and study international law, daughter of the DA and was the closest to perfection anyone would ever be— so what went wrong? What made her romanticise the idea of running away from a town where everyone loves and adores her?

Because of the above.

Yes, it may sound whiny and dramatic to feel tired of being loved and being the center of attention all the time, but there’s no point to it if it’s not you who they adore, but the person you’re pretending to be— (“I was feeling angsty and reckless. Tired of living up to the perfect image everybody expects out of me.”) —especially when you have to do so much just to maintain the lie.

Throughout LiS and BtS, Rachel’s ability to get along with everyone was always mentioned. At face value she was akin to a social butterfly. She hung out with stoners regardless of their social status (skaters or the vortex club), was friendly with anyone regardless of their place in the social hierarchy (eg; Daniel/Evan/Steph/Drew/Nathan) or even to strangers others usually ignored (Samuel/Homeless lady). Like Evan said, Her friends were her friends. She wasn’t one to let peer pressure affect her relationships so she wasn’t afraid to make all those acquaintances.

However, for those who knew her closely (Chloe and Jefferson), she was referred to as a chameleon, someone who blended in with everyone and everywhere seamlessly. This was an important detail regarding who Rachel was and her intimacy with others. To be able to make that comparison, they would’ve needed to know who the person Rachel actually was underneath the masks she’d created over the years. Chloe was the first to truly see and accept her for who she was. Jefferson was the one who exploited her for it.

For most, being a social chameleon would count as a beneficial social skill if they’re subtle. So long as the person doesn’t lose themselves in the process and is able to separate their personas from their true self, it remains a skill and will be used as such.

The problem with Rachel was that it transcended beyond a skill. A social chameleon was *what* she became, and that led to losing her own sense of identity, to becoming a stranger in her own body.

We see her confiding to Chloe about this feeling in Brave New World: (“Do you think there’s a point when you’ve been acting so much that you don’t even have your own personality anymore? You’re just whatever you think other people want you to be?”) —to which Chloe tells her she does have a personality because she assumed Rachel was talking about herself. But Rachel apparently wasn’t and clarifies she was talking about her father. She then elaborates on how her father doesn’t really exist, that how he was in the principal’s office was a mere performance and then the actual truth— that she’s afraid she’ll end up like him.

No matter how you interpret that scene, the conclusion is that one of Rachel’s fears was becoming like James— someone who’s been so wrapped up in all the lies and manipulation that he no longer seemed recognisable to even his own daughter.

At that point her defence mechanism of deflection and avoidance came into play after Chloe got a little too close to home. We first see this on the train scene when they play Two Truths and a Lie. Rachel gave factual statements as opposed to Chloe who gave facts that elaborated into her personal life. At one point Chloe can ask how Rachel knew about having a distal radius fracture and It’s a very minor detail, but when she explains that it’s because she broke her wrist when she was 10, she says it extremely fast. When Chloe is about to press for more info about something personal no matter what option you choose, Rachel dismissively turns around the conversation from herself back to Chloe again.

The next time we see her deflecting is right after witnessing her father cheating. When Chloe asks about her, Rachel deflects and guilt trips her into somehow thinking she’s at fault for failing to get them wasted and then proceeds to drown her sorrows into alcohol instead of opening up. Afterwards when they find the junkyard, Rachel chooses to isolate herself from Chloe and withdraws to the corner, getting irritated if Chloe chooses to invade her space. When Chloe confronts her about her sudden moodiness, Rachel yet again deflects and shifts the attention to Chloe by essentially telling her she’s self-centred. This scene was classic Deflection 101 brought by Rachel’s defence mechanism to cope with her father’s betrayal.

Rachel uses deflection and avoidance as a defence mechanism, a habit which stems from the dynamics of the Amber family. When you have a Politician as a father whose life work is to manipulate and lie, and a Stepford Wife as a mother who wilfully acts like a servant to her husband out of sacrifice and duty— an environment of deceit and suppression of one’s feelings will be fostered. This is what shapes Rachel to be distrusting and unhealthily altruistic as we see in BtS.

And so Rachel’s deflection is driven by 2 things: mistrust (James) and her unhealthy altruism (Rose).

As a district attorney, James unfortunately carried his work persona into his personal life and can be presumed to lie to even his own family on a daily basis to the point that Rachel can tell when he’s lying: (“When your Dad is the District Attorney, I guess lying is...something you're used to.”) (Why can't you just tell me the fucking truth?! Stop lying! Stop being a politician for one fucking minute! Can’t you just be my Dad?”) What that tells us is that Rachel’s actually used to being lied at and treated with cynicism, so naturally that would make her guarded around others. Not to mention since James often exercised his professional prerogative (just recall how he spoke to Chloe and her comment about his micro-aggressions towards his own family), it’s most likely that he was also cynical towards people in general and carried that mindset forward at Rachel as well.

As for Rose, you have to really observe how she carried herself and her choice of words. A lot of people pointed out how robotic she sounded and blamed it on bad voice acting, but I think that was actually intentional. She was too mannered, too submissive and too robotic as a person. It’s not exactly a bad thing, but a lot of her personality seemed to be too... *political* for the sake of her husband’s political career. It was altruistic in the way that she sacrificed her own needs for her husband’s and was unfailingly supportive (eg; preparing dinner all by herself, *respectfully* asking James for his drink, even going so far as to excuse James for kissing Sera like wtf). Point is, Rose was the stereotypical political wife whose job was to shut up, look good and smile for her husband while he does the talking. At one point in the dinner scene when they start fighting, James even dared to say ‘Rose, let me handle this’ as if Rose’s voice was irrelevant and unimportant to the table (when he literally just got exposed for cheating lmao).

So what happens when your family environment consists of a father who actively lies and uses manipulation to twist facts, expects you to be compliant in exchange for rewards (birthday money), has the ability to read people, and a mother who does too much for someone who does the barest minimum for the family and represses herself for the sake of others? An environment of deceit and suppression will be fostered, and you develop all of their qualities, for better or worse. That’s difficult to change when your own family dynamics molded you to be that way and then reward you for it. If you recall, Rachel’s mannerisms changed completely when in front of her family and if Chloe complained about having to play the goody two shoes formal well-behaved humorless girl, Rachel would say: ‘try doing it your whole life’. So not only was she playing different roles in school but evidently at home as well.

But It’s not as if the Amber family was aware of the toxic environment they’d created. That’s just what their normal was: to be well-mannered, formal, professional, mature and well-articulated.

This is where Rachel’s social chameleon tendencies develops. Social chameleons usually have reasons for blending in when it comes to personal relationships:

1. Being liked is important for them (they value what people think of them).

2. They want to blend in so as to not stand out (they don’t like attention).

3. They’re doing it to make the other person comfortable (the needs of others come first before theirs).

Considering how Rachel was extremely popular, active in all sorts of school activities and enjoyed the attention of being the star, no. 2 is out. She confessed to wanting to stop being a social chameleon and didn’t seem to care much about Victoria’s dislike of her + she also did it to her family so no. 1 is out as well, which leaves us to no. 3— doing it for the comfort of others. In other words, because she *gave too much shit about other people all the time*.

What further supports the point of Rachel’s unhealthy altruism is what she says to Chloe at the junkyard— (“Maybe you should try giving a shit about other people for once.”) —which essentially tells us that she’s been doing exactly that to be able to lecture Chloe into following her own perspective. Another example would be what she tells Chloe during their therapy session: “—Because she was tired of having to give so many fucks all the time.”

One thing however that all *extreme* social chameleons share is the fact that they **loathe** themselves, or at the very least— dislike who they are. Why else would they go all the trouble of creating different personas for everyone to the point of forgetting their own, if they actually liked themselves?

One of the many things that Chloe and Rachel shared in common was their self-awareness in how undeniably shitty they can be, and that they hated who they were. Whereas Chloe embraced that whole part of her down her self destructive road, Rachel tried to cover hers up by playing other roles for people. Both girls played their sides to the ends of the spectrum; Chloe being selfish (causing problems for everyone in general unnecessarily) and Rachel being selfless (posing no problem for anyone in general even if there was a problem). They had no healthy balance and their unhealthy mindset ultimately drove them down a self destructive path.

Rachel knew she was selfish by nature, and that she’d take it out on Chloe in Ep 1. That’s why instead of talking about what was wrong, she chose to drown herself to alcohol and distance herself from Chloe. When Chloe confronts her about it, she either tells her that not everything revolves around her or that she should try giving a shit about people for once. In other words, ‘Other people have bigger problems than you so shut up and don’t make it worse for them.’ That was Rachel’s mentality and in that moment of poor lapse in judgment, she applied that logic to Chloe expecting her to think the way she does— to put others before yourself.

With Rachel, she always had her walls up and couldn’t help it even if she wanted to because it's practically second nature to have her guard up (“I never said how dearly I hold thee; my habit's been to keep my soul well-draped.“). It’s only in her lowest vulnerable moments is when she finally let her walls down because that’s when she’s too tired to keep them up.

Luckily (or unluckily) for Rachel, she recognized her problem. The only thing is that she didn’t know how to solve them. She confided to Chloe about feeling like she doesn’t exist, but then backtracked and clarified she was talking about her dad instead when Chloe got too close to home. Even IF she was genuinely talking about her father, it doesn’t erase the fact that she believed there was a possibility she was going to become like him— because she already saw the signs and made the comparison between them.

Remember her infamous outbursts in Awake? Unlike Chloe, she’s the type who keeps everything bottled in until it’s too much. Seeing her father kissing another woman was the breaking point and that’s why she reacted badly. And then when she kicked that bin, that was equivalent to Chloe smashing up the junkyard. And then that scream. That scream was the result of years bottling her pent up frustration, stress, anger at everyone including herself. Because she did everything to make her family proud, to please everyone to the point that she felt so empty and hollow, only to realize that it was all for nothing because her father was destroying her family. It wasn’t just a betrayal from her father but a betrayal to herself.

And then there’s Chloe Price. The girl who is the total opposite of her, yet who she can somehow still connect with at the same time. While she cared too much about what others thought, Chloe gave absolutely no fucks. That was her most attractive and admirable quality for Rachel. So what does she do? She latches onto Chloe to do exactly what she knows best. Become the ideal version of whoever wants her to be. In other words, the Rachel Amber who would finally give no fucks.

Rachel was the closest to her truest self when she was around Chloe. Just as she brought life and hope back into the girl’s life, so did Chloe for her. Chloe broke the walls she put up, and she’d seen her vulnerable enough times to let her mask slip. Chloe saw her at her lowest, ugliest self even when she wasn’t doing her usual thing of keeping everyone around her happy, yet she didn’t mock or leave her for it. For the first time, she was selfish, and *still* Chloe came back. That was a BIG reason to trust each other for the both of them. And that’s ultimately what bonded them for so long— the fact that they could be the shittiest people on earth, yet still see the best in each other even if they only see the worst in themselves.

Chloe was the first one to see through her social chameleon act because she slipped, and she continued to let her unmask who she was because that night Rachel just didn’t care enough to hold up the act any longer. This detail of Rachel’s chameleon act slipping *only* when something was wrong is a vital part in understanding the context around her. The first time was when she witnessed her whole world crash, the second was when she realized she was becoming like James, and the third was when she discovered what a monster James was. The fourth— when she asked that trucker for a drive out and didn’t bother to be her usual social chameleon self. We may never know what happened, but something wrong was going on in Rachel’s life that she didn’t want Chloe to be a part of— because why would she put the girl who stuck by her during her darkest hours through her bullshit again?

But at the end of the day, that wasn’t enough. Chloe wasn’t enough. And that’s understandable because a teenager truly can’t and shouldn’t have to be responsible for someone else’s happiness. No matter what choice Chloe makes at the end of BtS, the truth inevitably gets out and leads to Rachel having a fall out with her parents. When that happened, she lost a big pillar of her support system which only leaves her with Chloe who’s another emotionally damaged teen that’s on the road to self-destruction. Chloe can’t help others without helping herself first. But still, who else is there to make them feel a little less shitty except each other?

After her fall out with her parents and her father in particular, she seemed to have developed a taste for men twice her age: Frank Bowers (32) and Mark Jefferson (38). Whatever the reason her relationship with Frank was, she still wrote him those letters and seemed to have cared for him to some extent. Not only was he the source for drugs for her very much needed escape, but he was also the man who helped save her life in one of her most vulnerable moments, and a possible lead to find Sera. It’s not that surprising she’d seek comfort and safety in his arms when he already proved himself once. But clearly it wasn’t serious because she was fooling around with Jefferson at the same time (and Frank knew they wouldn’t have lasted anyway).

Now, Jefferson. The devs confirmed that Rachel was in love with Jefferson and honestly, that’s the least surprising thing ever considering how he basically had the female population of Blackwell head over heels for him. Even Rachel wasn’t immune to that psychopath’s charm. He was a well reputable photographer, had the connections to propel her modeling career, was attractive and mysterious and apparently a damaged soul. He was the perfect one way ticket out of Arcadia Bay. He was her photographer and she was his muse. He was basically the perfect solution to her problems.

The girl clearly had deep rooted daddy issues and was ashamed of it herself since she couldn’t even share her secret relationship to the one person she trusted the most despite sharing her other relationships with her (except Frank).

This is where the drugs and partying come in. They’re a way for her to escape the bullshit in her life for a few hours. Chloe was what made her feel real, but the drugs and partying was what made her forget— forget that her biological mother chose drugs and money over her (twice), forget that her own father was so despicable that he was planning to overdose Sera (this is what Chloe said in the silent dialogue), forget that her biological mother may just be dead somewhere because of James, forget that her own family was a lie, forget all the expectations placed upon her, forget that she herself was a lie, forget that she was so insecure that she had to seek warmth and safety in the arms of men twice her age, forget the guilt of knowing the girl who would die for her was still not enough, forget that at the end of the day all her problems is caused by her own mind and that her own fears had come to reality. And she hated herself for that.

But still, Rachel wasn’t a total junkie or outwardly self destructive to the point that she abandoned her studies like Chloe did. She didn’t let the drugs and partying dictate her life, hence the 4.0 GPA. After all, she still had a reputation to maintain. She was still the DA’s daughter, and getting into college was still a way to get out of Arcadia Bay.

BUT SEE, that was exactly Rachel’s problem. She could never choose which to be; The Problematic Junkie of a Disappointment (Sera), or the Golden Child (James & Rose) everyone expected her to be. She wanted to be as free as Chloe, but she also didn’t want to be a disappointment. She was tired of everything but couldn’t allow herself to fall because it was her nature to demand the best of herself for others as long as she could do it. But what happens when it’s your very own nature you’re going against? It gets really complicated. So instead of choosing, she doesn’t and becomes both. That was ultimately the worst decision she ever made.

Make no mistake, Rachel was an absolute idiot for being so indecisive. She could have easily solved her problems if she just finally gave no shit and did whatever she wanted to. But that’s the problem with people who’re labeled as perfect growing up. They eventually believe it and demand perfection of themselves. They care too much about everything because if they have the ability to be perfect, then why would you choose not to be? When someone is seen to be perfect, disappointment is 10x worse. Even Chloe was guilty of idealizing Rachel to be this perfect girl and was disappointed when she realized Rachel was just like everyone else who puts in hard work—(“Rachel's always made being an A student seem so easy. Almost sad to see all this... effort."), but it’s Chloe accepting Rachel for who she was despite no longer being the perfect girl she believed her to be that mattered.

With being seen as perfect usually comes with the assumption that your whole life is. Just as everyone invalidated her problems because she’s Little Miss Perfect with the perfect grades and the seemingly perfect family, so did she.

‘Cause hey, what does she have to be mad about when she’s a rich white girl who’s been given everything she’s ever wanted, right? (James basically said that). At that point the only problem Rachel had was that she was acting as the perfect daughter and perfect friend and perfect student at the expense of her own happiness, and then throw in the sudden slap in the face that it was all for nothing because her father was destroying the family she’d tried so hard to do proud.

But then again even if that wasn’t enough reason to spiral, it really would mess you up if your own father told you that your biological mother chose money and drugs over you, that everything you’ve done so far was all for a lie and worst of all, that your own father was going to kill your biological mother and there’s nothing you can do to change that. I mean really, I’m not a therapist or anything but I wouldn’t be surprised if Rachel’s mental health was suffering by that point.

I mean get this: she abused drugs and partied harder than anyone else and got wasted even though she knew they were wrong (Sera would’ve been a painful reminder), slept around with older men who undoubtedly took advantage and controlled her, continued to act like the perfect student and pretended to be someone she’s not just to keep everyone happy even though it was causing her to question her own existence— it’s almost as if she was punishing herself for continuing down that path.

Ultimately what Rachel was running away from was who she had become in Arcadia Bay. Once she’d be out, she wouldn’t be Little Miss Perfect anymore. She wouldn’t be the DA’s daughter. She wouldn’t have to keep lying. She would be able to start over. She would just be Rachel Amber, the nobody.

She cared too much in contrast to Chloe’s ‘I don’t give a shit’ attitude, and that’s why she still managed to maintain her perfect image even when she was already so broken. Whereas Chloe’s first instinct was to blame others, Rachel’s was to blame herself. Both never had a healthy balance when it came to accepting responsibility and that’s what connected them so well together.

Call it selflessness or selfishness or stupidity or melodrama, but at the end of the day Rachel tried to keep everyone around her happy, just like Max tried to do with her powers except Rachel used lies to do it. She was greedy and selfish, no disagreement to that, but she also tried to be selfless for most of her life. She was her own enemy and she demonized herself for it. And that got her murdered, thrown and buried away like the used rag doll she treated herself to be.

She was Chloe’s angel and Chloe was hers, but she was also her own demon. And there’s only so much two broken angels can do against a demon.

**TL;DR:** Idealizing her to be the Perfect Girl was what made her want to run away. Her family was what broke her. Desperation for escape was what killed her. Her family just *really* suck.

Now, I’m not trying to justify Rachel’s actions but merely rationalizing her character. I acknowledge that she was capable of being a shitty person at times, but just as Chloe had her issues, so did she, and so I choose to see them both for what they tried to be. Good hearted people just trying to make their shitty life a little easier. At the end of the day, Rachel Amber was a deeply flawed, insecure and emotionally damaged girl that pretended like nothing was wrong to forget about her troubles for a little, and was just dealt a bad hand in life. Literally.

After writing all of this, I realize that holy shit this girl was fucking complicated and a single post doesn’t do her justice nor explains her character properly enough. I thought it’d be simple enough to word it out, but then again, someone who was basically a junkie yet still managed to maintain her perfect reputation amongst her peers and the faculty is bound to be this complexed. Also as you can see I got very lazy at the middle of the elaborations and repetition has probably made this unnecessarily long but thank you for reading and finishing this overall confusing and messy essay.

[noddytheornithopod]

today on danganronpa s, more squad

Maki

Sakura and Maki catch each other in the kitchen at night, both getting drinks, though Sakura’s for later and Maki’s is after training. Then, sudden Nagisa appearance (oh hey, shared English VA). Apparently he’s taking an entire platter of food when it’s supposed to be for everyone. Nagisa is actually a bit of a smartass, saying it wouldn’t be enough for “everyone”, and “the maid” wouldn’t care who eats it. Maki points out besides Masaru the other kids couldn’t finish dinner. Nagisa feels awkward, saying they’re allowed to eat when they want. Sakura adds mere snacks isn’t as nutritious as “real food”, and basically tells him they need to eat healthy and have proper meals. Nagisa insists they’re never going to grow up. Maki recognises that talk from them, and fixating on hating adults won’t help in the long run. Nagisa is stubborn and takes the tray. Sakura wonders if they should’ve stopped him, but Maki knows intervening would just make him more stubborn, saying they’ll warn him again if he’s still up late or gets tired of snacking. Maki still thinks this isn’t the best approach though, saying Kirumi would probably have a far more efficient solution. Sakura admires her skills though, even if Maki is really humble and basically says she’s just lucky with these observations.

Swimsuit time, of course. :P Chiaki compliments her, saying it’s easy to move in. Maki agrees, but also notes she can’t carry anything in it. Apparently Maki wasn’t even into the idea for a swimsuit, but apparently Kaede and Kaito wouldn’t stop asking her to wear it. Two ship teases for one! Chiaki says she would’ve asked her to as well, saying she wants to join her in the ocean. Apparently that’s what Kaito and Kaede also said, but Maki doesn’t really understand why people would want to socialise with her when there’s loads of other people. Chiaki says why not, plus she’d probably get lonely. Maki then says Chiaki looks like she has her head in the clouds, but she can also get surprisingly aggressive. :P Chiaki just figured she’d be talkative until Maki opens up. She also wants to thank Maki for entertaining her gaming requests. Maki finds that a weird way to thank her, but admits she wasn’t fully honest. Cut to Kaito and Himiko, and lol the latter also calls her Maki Roll. Apparently... they’re buried up to their necks. :v Maki is naturally all “what the hell?” Chiaki notes her frustrated reaction but notes she’s going over to help them anyway, seeing she is kind deep down. Maki just tells her to can it. :v Apparently the tide is rising too, Monokubs can you fix this? Himiko remarks she should use magic to escape. Anyway, Maki figures that it’s Kokichi, Gonta, Ibuki and Hiyoko who are responsible given she sees them on a float. Maki is slow to act, wondering who to start with. Himiko panics, Kaito says he’s the hero so he’ll be fine and she can focus on Himiko. Himiko then says that would look evil for her and says to save Kaito. :v Maki turns out to actually just be teasing them... wow, what a situation for that. :v She says Chiaki can help Himiko. Kaito and Himiko are naturally freaked out at that revelation. :v Even Chiaki seems to be playful, saying they seemed to be having so much fun she went off into a corner. Kaito admires how far Maki has come, and she says to consider it part of his training, lol. Chiaki then ends asking if she’s glad she had a swimsuit now, given she seems to be enjoying herself.

Peko and Nekomaru time. Peko asks about how Maki works out with Kaito and Shuichi. Nekomaru is also curious. Maki says it’s not really a big deal and probably seems half arsed compared to what they do (I mean, I’m sure at least Kaito is half assing it lol). She says it’s pretty basic like sit ups and push ups, and on bad days they even just chat, it’s very haphazard and spur of the moment to her. Peko seems surprised, and Nidai clarifies they both seem intrigued at the good results they have. Maki naturally doesn’t expect such an answer. Nidai says maybe it’s not good for say building muscle, but he points out how her and Shuichi have grown. Nidai basically mentions many athletes may train their bodies, but they don’t train the mind, and wonders what spurred a change. Maki says it must be “Kaito’s ridiculousness”. Peko notes he seems like the group leader, though Maki admits she’s not comfortable saying so much, not expecting to get this much attention. Nidai thinks he gets it, saying they get results specifically because of their bonds. Peko admits she envies this, wishing she had companions for this. Poor Maki’s just getting more embarrassed though.

Yasuhiro and Hiyoko, heh. Maki’s taking a break, saying apparently the kids seem fond of her? Hiyoko appears, calling her... big sis Maki. Hiro says “Maks” has perfect timing for his video debut. Maki then remarks the only peaceful place must be her hotel room, lol. Hiyoko calls Hiro “Eraserhead”, and says he’s trying to get rich off a weird video he starred in. Hiro insists watching it will make you want to pay, lol. Maki sees through his BS, but Hiro insists further. Maki figures it’s him just reading a fortune, and Hiro says it’s basically a way to get customers. Maki says it’s not a bad idea, but before voicing her issues, Hiyoko says she just wants less of his nasty face. :v He insists “Hiyobro” will change her mind when she sees it, and it’s minimalist. Hiyoko ain’t buying it, and also hates the nickname. :v Hiro’s response is... Saionjeans is too much of a mouthful. Maki starts backing away, but Hiyoko begs her for help, while Hiro begs Maki to say something to convince Hiyoko to watch. Maki is naturally done.

We’re with... Monomi? She’s looking all beat up, and Maki figures the kids were rough playing with her. Monomi insists she’s not a plaything and just wanted to play. Monomi had to fight to get her swimsuit back, and Maki wonders if they just found it funny a stuffed animal wore one in the first place. Maki then gets a brush to straighten her hair. Monomi says they really look up to her... Maki has doubts about that, and if they do she wishes they wouldn’t pull her hair. :v Monomi thinks they just admire it and think it’s pretty, to which Maki says by that logic maybe they admire Monomi. :P Monomi is surprised, but Maki merely says it’s possible, knowing it’s hard to understand them. Monomi suddenly turns optimistic and seems a bit too okay with being beaten. :v

Impostor time. Maki is surprised someone like them exists, while Impostor is open to hear whatever she has to say. Maki says she’s not condemning or avoiding, just surprised, and wonders what got them to reveal their true self to the class. Impostor simply says it’s as simple as wanting to be their friend. Maki gets defensive, wondering if he’s implying people can’t be friends while keeping secrets, but then takes her words back. Impostor wonders why she’d ask anyway, and says his reasoning is he wants everyone to know their true self, and that’s what motivated him to reveal himself. Maki remarks they must admire they classmates, and when Impostor senses she might not feel the same, Maki refuses to answer, but Impostor claims to know anyway. Interesting to see these two secret keepers talk, heh.

Maki sees Sakura and wonders about her physical abilities. Sakura assures her she’s fine to ask, noticing her skills. She worried it might be taboo for Maki, but apparently not. Sakura asks why come to her specifically, to which she says she’s the strongest of those who use their power correctly. Sakura doesn’t question her circumstances but says not everyone has to follow her path. Besides fighting, she could use it for protection or introspection. Maki acknowledges her point, saying she could use her skillset for multiple purposes.

Maki talks to Kotoko, who says she didn’t know high schoolers could be caregivers. Maki says her circumstances are exceptional, saying it’s all she ever did. Kotoko finds the orphanage reassuring, surprising Maki. Kotoko says it’s because there probably weren’t grown-ups who treated kids as commodities. Kotoko also loves the idea that someone young like Maki looked after the kids, and thinks it’s paradise. Maki actually says the kids around her wished they had families, to which Kotoko says they don’t realise they’d be spared of suffering. Kotoko says she’s kidding, but Maki actually realises that Kotoko must’ve already been through a lot at such age. She says being in a family might not guarantee safety, but the inverse is true too. Kotoko then says Maki is lecturing her like a grown up. Maki actually offers her to visit the orphanage funnily enough. She even says it could be a chance for the kids there to befriend ones from outside the orphanage. Kotoko wonders about making friends, and Maki assures her she isn’t flattery, which Kotoko agrees she isn’t the type for. It’s a deal. Not gonna lie, this was actually a pretty sad conversation, like when Kotoko mentioned at least the kids wouldn’t be treated like commodities, I was like “boy, do I have some news for you”.

Maki talks to... Syo. She’s surprised Maki is talking to her, but Maki then just gets to the point and asks how she stopped murdering. Naturally, Syo says it’s because of Byakuya, lol. Syo wonders if she’s being mocked when Maki ponders her decision, but then Maki says if anything it was a compliment and she could never do what she does. Maki quickly realises that while Syo has a choice, she doesn’t. From they way they talk, I also get the impression Maki admitted her dark side to Syo too?

Sayaka time, she’s complimenting Maki’s style. She apparently has been admiring her from afar, and goes on about her physique. Sayaka apologises for staring. I have a feeling a new ship is born. :v Maki thinks she’s looking at her like she’s a rival idol, and Sayaka mentions she thinks about feminine charm every day, trying to figure out what the ideal idol should be. Maki gets the sense being an entertainer is tough, though Sayaka just asks what her ideal girl is (well uh this could certainly be read as very sapphic). Maki slowly admits her answer: someone ordinary, someone lonely and cries a lot, but gentle and kind. Sayaka wonders if she’s talking about a friend, and Maki says “something like that” (oh god it better not be that best friend she sacrificed herself for only for her to die anyway welp). Sayaka says she wouldn’t stand a chance with that authenticity, and the personal connection Maki has. Maki then says she’s still part of her (past tense oh no). Sayaka explains despite not being anyone’s number one she’s able to smile for anyone, and those are the idols she admires. Maki then reveals she had fans at her orphanage, and they had fun imitating her songs and dances. Sayaka then says that’s the kind of idol she wants to be.

Maki is helping decide on what play to do. She suggests Cinderella, and while Kazuichi says he’d be into it if Sonia were, he suggests a play with more unisex roles. Maki says he could be the stepmother or sisters, which Kazuichi refuses because he doesn’t want to look bad to Sonia (dude, she likes the evil overlord guy :v). Maki is in disbelief.

Mondo likes her suggestion of Momotaro. Maki thinks he’d be better as a demon, which Mondo briefly gets mad about but takes it back, realising it could be fun.

The Wolf and the Seven Young Goats was an option too. Mikan seems nervous about the gory content... but she’s actually saying she could do the surgery scenes, to which Maki says it would be an issue if it leads to age restrictions due to the realistic depiction. Like the other two, Maki sticks to Momotaro.

Mondo at the bonfire, he actually recounts Momotaro and how strange it turned out even if it was fun. Mondo is surprised at how she can move, apparently Akane wanted to fight her. She says it was just adrenaline and being appropriate for the role. Mondo ends up getting it, saying she has to act like she wants to be the big boss herself. Also heh, swordfight with Peko.

Tenko... oh, she actually heard about Chihiro’s reveal? She seems to be... struggling. Tenko never could picture someone being that kind and sweet being male, she wasn’t even suspicious. Maki is surprised to see she isn’t doing her “men are the worst” shtick. Tenko still says degenerate males are evil... but even if Chihiro is not a girl, they’re more of an idol than she could ever hope to be, and after hearing everything they can’t even wish they really were a girl after all. Tenko then starts worrying she might have been hurting them all this time, amazed she’s this concerned. Maki assures her that she is kind though, and she actually says Tenko should go and tell Chihiro what she said. Tenko thinks she might be right, and says the Chihiro she knows would. Maki then keeps Tenko company to deal with the shock.

Another Syo scene, damn. She thinks brooding is wasting time and only Byakuya matters, while Maki says she should slow down and reflect. Syo insists she does sometimes slow down to think... it’s just most of the time her mind is stripping Byakuya. :v Maki wonders how she can be so positive yet so unlikeable, but she sees there’s value to both reflection and looking forward.

Oh, Chihiro and Maki final scene? Chihiro’s surprised Maki has come to them, and apologises when Maki says they don’t need to be so nervous. Maki finds it interesting how they’re strong yet cowardly, and Chihiro perks up at the former. Maki says it’s because they were able to admit their secret and now talk about it. Chihiro apologises for deceiving everyone, but Maki assures them it’s fine, saying she’s the same with secrets. Chihiro apparently has been told Maki has her own big secret, and Maki says she could never do what they did. Maki then asks how Chihiro felt revealing such a thing to so many people. Chihiro says secrets are hard to hold onto, but ultimately they wanted to change. Chihiro says they pretended to be female to run away from their own weakness, and sealed the weak side of themselves away with a lie and got used to a brief peace of mind. However, Chihiro wanted to graduate at their true self. They say even if everyone DID despise them for the truth, lifting that weight off them would still be worth it. Naturally, Chihiro is really grateful everyone accepted them for who they are. :) Maki thinks Chihiro really is strong, but she isn’t. Chihiro is surprised and kinda flustered, saying it wasn’t purely their own power. Chihiro then mentions having friends who knew and helped them get to this point (if that plural means anything, wonder who else besides Mondo knew?). Chihiro then asks if Maki has people she can share her secret with, and says only two know (Kaito and Shuichi). Chihiro says Maki doesn’t need to stress, and she doesn’t have to reveal everything. Maki wonders if they should be saying that if they hid their secret for so long. Chihiro then says there’s infinite reasons for secrets, and says it’s not good to reveal every one. Maki realises that still means deception, but Chihiro says they can tell Maki wants to open up to all her friends. Maki actually says it’s not that, but if it will hurt either way, she’d rather just get it over with. Maki admits her desire is selfish, knowing revealing the truth could endanger those around her. Despite knowing she’s not allowed to talk, Maki can’t help but be flustered. Maki then apologises to Chihiro feeling it’s useless. Chihiro actually says Maki can still talk to them though if they don’t mind, even if they still want to hold their secret, outright saying if Maki ever feels overwhelmed she can come to Chihiro. They think Kaito and Shuichi would probably be more reliable though... Maki then says if she even said it was them who knew the secret. Chihiro wondered if they’re mistaken, to which Maki says they’re not, but she has mixed feelings. Chihiro apologises and just figured it was them because they get along really well, but Maki says there’s no need, and when Chihiro describes them that way she isn’t opposed to said feelings.

An alternate scene with... Usami. This time, Usami just seems to be chasing after the kids. Apparently... the kids turned her house in the amusement park into their hideout. Apparently they also messed up academy documents there that Usami had to fix, and she tried to give a soft warning but they escaped anyway. Maki wonders how even Monaca could get away cuz wheelchair, to which Usami says she must be good at hiding, with Maki replying that maybe she’s just bad at finding her. Usami just wants to be mindful of her circumstances, and Maki understands.

Okay wow, things were much more emotional than I expected, lol.

[thezitteam]

fight practice! good to brush up on skills, so you don't get rusty! Zedaph, that's not how you hold a sword, how are you doing this! that aside, I'm interested to know if you have ideas for how some of them might meet?

ren would be completely Appalled, albeit quite enthralled, with how zedaph holds his sword, but who is he to correct something that works?

i definitely do! i’ve been talking about this with some of my irl friends who watch hermitcraft, and we were thinking about a triennial interkingdom meeting between the three kingdoms for... diplomatic relations. in these interkingdom meetings, the kings and queens would definitely have political discussions, but the children have things like training camps for fighting. as all three kingdoms harbour no ill feelings toward one another, i think these training camps would really be for sharing of knowledge and for socialising. so hermits from different kingdoms are likely to get to know each other from here!

similarly to greece in olden times, i’m also thinking about an “olympic” of sorts, where there are friendly competitions every (few) year(s). definitely thinking about etho Really Noticing bdubs for the first time when he beats a dozen other older kids in sprint-races.

i haven’t really thought about the intricacies of how the hermits in the same kingdom meet, it’s generally an overarching “they grew up together”. but perhaps grian saw a young boy walking amongst the witches once, which was a rare sight, which really piqued his interest, and he wouldn’t stop until he got to know the boy (which would end up being scar). 

and perhaps, impulse and tango were close friends months before they first met zedaph, and tango stumbles upon zedaph one day, becomes intrigued and speaks to zedaph like any other person, completely unaware that he is the prince. zedaph, meeting the first person in his life who doesn’t speak to him with sugarcoated formalities, warms up to tango quick. it is impulse who finds out and tells tango that zedaph is the prince, but by then, zedaph is unwilling to let his first friend go, and tells them that they need not speak to him formally. and their friendship blooms from there.

i’m still not sure though, and i would love to have your input!

[secondhand-trash]

Every Snowflake Is Different(Just Like You)

Ficmas day 3 aka 4 days till Christmas owo

A/N: I’m aware that the plot doesn’t actually echoes the song all that much but hey, at least it’s cute and fluffy. (It is cute, right? Right???)

Description: There is something different about this person he always share a lift with each morning.

Pairing: Todoroki Shouto x reader

Word count: 2224

Yes, I know that this is not techincally an actual Christmas song but I like it so it counts.

-

There was something special about this person he always share a lift with.

After he graduated, Todoroki Shouto did the exact opposite of what the public expected him to do and joined a small hero agency as a sidekick instead of working for his father or made the jumpstart to directly owning his own agency like people speculated him to do so. He didn’t bother explaining his decision to anyone, the ones whose opinion mattered to him were the ones that understood the motives behind his decision right away without even needing an explanation. 

He had learned all he needed to know from his father already, the title of being the no 1 hero’s son didn’t bother him anymore than it matters to him. It was his life, his career, and he would do what he thinks will work the best for him.

Amidst the tens and hundreds of agencies that poured in fighting over him, he ended up choosing a humble agency that located on the top floor of an office building. The small-scale agency was a huge contrast from the one that he interned at, taking up only a small part of the building instead of having one whole skyscraper dedicated to one single hero like many others. The pro-hero he worked for wasn’t the most popular or the most skilled, they were rather mundane, in all honesty. But that down-to-earth aspect of the hero showed him that there was more to being a hero than just skills and reputation. To save lives, you must first understand how most people live and it was the thing that he didn’t learn from the harsh training he was given his entire life.

He had spent his entire life being a hero in making that sometimes he forgot how to be just a regular person and it was a lot of conflict between wanting to prove that he was different than who people think he is and not wanting to be treated differently because of it.

It took a while for everyone else who worked at that office building to act indifferently around him. For a while, there were constant glances and whispers from people when they thought he wasn’t aware. Shouto knew that he would have to live with that his entire life with what he does for a living and his background, but that didn’t stop him from feeling a little relieved the first time he walked into the elevator without anyone in the compressed space paying any extra attention on him.

For once, he was just Shouto. Nothing more, nothing less.

While he was starting to blend in with the many civilians who were just there every morning to go to their respective duties, there was someone in the middle of that cramped 9am elevator ride that caught his attention.

You always arrived at the office building at sharply 8:54 every morning, just a little bit later than him which means that he sees you walking in from the heavy glass doors every morning from the lobby. You would stand next to him, staring at the changing numbers of the sign above the elevator with a cup of coffee in hand. For a short while, it would be just you and him until others who work at different offices of the building started rushing in and lining up behind you. 

The lifts were always crowded in the morning and people couldn’t be any more impatient as they tried to squeeze into the small compartment, not wanting to wait 3 extra minutes for the next ride. Being the first ones in the line, he would always end up standing next to you in the corner. The few interactions he had with you mostly muttered apologies when either one of you bumped into the other person when the lift got too crowded of people were trying to get in. He had come to notice that you were more concern about your coffee than you were about yourself, brows knitting together and shielding the cup with an arm whenever people stood too close to you but didn’t seem to care much when he bumped into your shoulder.

By the time the elevator stopped for perhaps the fourth or fifth time, most people would have already left the lift, leaving only the two of you. At that point, he would have already taken a few steps away from you now that there are more space. 

There would always be a sigh of relieve from you whenever people started exiting the lift. From the way your shoulders eased and you shifted from one foot to another, he made the guess that you went on your tip toes to make more space when people started pouring in. That’s when you would pop the lid of the cup off and take a sip of your coffee, filling the entire lift with the strong aroma. It smelt more sweet than it does bitter each time, you must have added a ton of milk and sugar to the drink.

You worked just a floor beneath him, leaving plenty of time for him to be alone with you in that lift before you walked out of it eventually. He wasn’t sure if it was pure curiosity, his own boredom or something else but before Shouto even knew it, he had made a mental note on a lot of your small ticks and quirks.

You let out a soft hiss every time you took the first sip of your coffee and tried to pretend that it didn’t happen, blowing gently at the steaming liquid to cool it down before carefully testing the temperature with the tip of your tongue again. You were wary of other people noticing that embarrassing moment because he had caught you glancing at him sideways after doing that once and you immediately looked up like nothing happened. On the contrary of your cat’s tongue, you seemed to be very sensitive towards the cold because you always carry a cardigan in one hand no matter what weather it was out there.

He wasn’t sure what it was that made you stood out from everyone else who he sees in that building every day but he found himself to look forward to that short amount of time he spent in the lift each morning. 

You seemed to be different from everyone else. Unique in some way that he couldn’t begin to describe. There was something special about you, and he wondered what it was.

As people started rushing in, his eyes naturally searched amongst many other figures to see if he could catch a glimpse of you this morning as well. There were times when he found himself getting too anxious about it when you were practically a stranger to him in all means but it had all become a part of his routine by now and the possibility of each time being the last worried him a lot more than it should. 

Perhaps one day, you would just stop showing up and he would never know. He wouldn’t even know your name and he would always just be another person you run into each day for you when you always seemed so special to him.

But that was a dilemma for another day as you walked past the tall glass doors wearing the heaviest coat Shouto had ever seen. He was well-aware that it was winter and although he wasn’t one to be sensitive to the drop in temperature due to his own quirk, all the people around him had decked out the woolen garments and the coats. You, on the other hand, seemed to just pile everything you could fit into onto yourself with a scarf around your neck and your arms clearly restrained by the thick sleeves of your coat. 

All the extra layers made it even harder for everyone to fit into one single lift. Shouto couldn’t contain the sigh of relieve that escaped his lips when the last person who was pressed up against him left. 

Finally, some space to breathe in.

From the corner of his eye, he could see you slowly peeling off the many layers you were wearing. You seemed to struggle a little as you passed the paper cup from hand to hand as you clumsily tried to pull your arms out of the sleeves. He discretely glanced at you as you take of your scarf, your coat, another jacket, only to reveal that you were still wearing a cardigan beneath all the other garments.

It wasn’t really that cold, was it?

He couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed when the bell rang, signaling that it was your floor. Now carrying a large pile of cloths in your arm, you stepped out of the lift and his eyes never once left your back, trying to take just one more look at you before he had to wait for the next morning to come.

His heart nearly leaped out of his chest when you suddenly turned around and stop the door from closing with your foot. A loud bang could be heard as you slammed the side of your shoe onto the bar of the door.

“You know,” you said with a wide smirk to the hero who was still in shock, “you could have just say something to mean instead of staring the whole time.”

With that, you turned on your heels like nothing happened, leaving a very flustered Shouto in the lift all by himself. His face heated up at the realisation that his staring hadn’t been so discrete after all.

The entire building went into a state of panic and chaos when the fire alarm of the entire building rang.

Shouto was uncharacteristically nervous when he was waiting for the lift the next day.

Now that you knew he had been looking at you the whole time, would you try to avoid him? Would your only impression of him be that he acted like a creep? He could feel his face heating up once again when you walked into the building and stood behind him. Desperately trying to act normal, he scrambled to maintain his body temperature by activating his quirk, keeping up a face of indifference.

He had physically forced himself to stop glancing at your direction when he caught his gaze wandering several times while being in the lift. He was never the best at socialising and although those few years he spent at school did help, he still found it hard to truly read social cues sometimes. The fact that he had to confront you eventually didn’t help with the dryness at the back of his throat.

It was only when the people were staring to clear out that he noticed you were holding two cups in your hand instead of one. It shouldn’t have mattered to him but the slight oddity irked him, did you bought the extra drink for someone? It made him bitter in how little he barely knew about you but he couldn’t take his eyes off you. It was ridiculous and made no sense, whatever that thing he felt in his chest was, he did not want it at all.

“Here.” 

He snapped out of his thoughts when you nudged at his shoulder, extending an arm to hand him a cup. You were smiling at him and he was utterly confused.

You chuckled when you saw his blank expression examining you. “Are you gonna take it or what?”

Taking the cup from your hand, his fingertips were instantly met with a soothing warmth. He wasn’t one to be sensitive to heat, but he could feel his entire body heating up when you continued grinning at him. “Thank you, but what for?”

“You seemed to be rather intrigued by my drink every day so I decided to get you one.” You said, “Hot chocolate to warm you up, you never seem to be wearing enough clothes.”

Shouto would like to argue that you were the one who was wearing too many layers but swallowed it back. You popped off the lid of your cup and scrunched your face together after taking a small sip after letting out a small cough. “Mine has already gone cold though so it might not work as well as I hoped it to.”

He didn’t say another word as he take your drink in his hand and you gasped when you saw steam rising from the previous lukewarm beverage. “Here.”

You were still awestruck when he handed back your cup and you hummed in content when you felt the warm sweetness on the tip of your tongue. Right at that moment, the elevator’s door opened and you looked up to see that it was your floor.

Putting one hand on the sensor, you looked back and smiled at the hero who was tentatively taking a sip of the reheated chocolate. “You really are a special one, aren’t you?”

Still a bit flabbergasted from the encounter, Shouto let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding in as he sipped on his drink. 

Special. You called him special.

With a soft smile on his lips, his brows quirked up when he twisted the cup to see lines of scribbled number on the cup holder.

“Text me? xoxo”

[littlemissnellie]

and finally for glimmerbrook we have a household of my own creation: the akers. 

ex-crook jamari turned his life around when he met darwin, a rather unassuming potion merchant, who took his breath away the second they met each other’s gaze. he was certain that he’d been jinxed, that was the only rational way to explain the way he felt, but alas, it was all from his own heart. his friends had led him down the wrong path from a young age, but his desire to impress this guy could be the the thing to finally pull him back onto the right one. low and behold, spending more time figuring out how to get that handsome guy from the potion shop to speak to him than figuring out which rune statue would be the easiest to smuggle home does wonders for a person’s mindset and at the end of it all he came out the other side of this plot a changed man, with a loving husband to show for it. if darwin wasn’t enough of a reason to change his ways then their children certainly did the trick. this was the first time in jamari’s life where he had people depending on him, after years of fending for himself and being the only one that had to face the consequences, he now had three, innocent, little lives in his hands that he had to protect. they all think of him as their hero, darwin included, but jamari  can’t shake the fact that he still feels like a villain...

as always, if you’d like to have them in your game then check out the download link below, and if not then i hope that you enjoy finding out a little more about them in their fact files!

download: simfileshare

i hope you’re doing okay!

jamari akers:

what began as taking a tiny crystal from a market stall to give to his friend for a birthday present he couldn’t have otherwise afforded quickly spiraled into an unshakable habit of swiping things that weren’t his - after a while it became less about the monetary value of the items and more about the thrill of the game, but when he realised that there were people out there that needed the money he could get for the items more than he did he became the robin hood of glimmerbrook - take from the powerful and give to the needy, all anonymously, of course

 he’s not proud of his past, but the one thing he did take from it was a lot of connections with other spellcasters in the realm - it wasn’t the most noble of approaches to friendship, but he had to get to know his victims before he robbed them; it helped him understand their way of thinking - now he takes the much more civilised route of a fortnightly book club

a really avid reader, even as a young boy he loved story books - he’d imagine himself in each protagonist’s shoes and get lost in their tall tales - he never felt like he could be himself, but books allowed him to shed that uncertainty and become a new person entirely, even if it was just for a chapter or two at a time

darwin akers:

never would have pinned jamari as an underground criminal the first time that he saw him, not that he had a ‘model thief’ to base him off, but still - sure, he had a sort of roguish charm about him, but that didn’t exactly scream ‘i steal things for sport’ - he never asked him to change his ways though, that was entirely jamari’s decision and although he’s very grateful for the fact that they don’t have to run from the law every other tuesday, he is kind of attracted to that bad boy side of his husband

unlike jamari, he always strove to do the right thing - he lived an unassuming life up until jamari sauntered into his potion shop to shake everything up and whilst jamari changed his delinquent ways, darwin came to realise that his life by the rule book had been a rather dull one - he wasn’t exactly inspired to start committing petty crimes, but he did start straying ever so slightly closer to the wild side to spice things up a bit

when he gets invested in something, he practically hands his whole heart over - he doesn’t do things by halves, especially when it comes to celebrations or special occasions - his date nights in particular are not to be missed; after hearing about jamari’s feelings of being an outcast, his heartstrings were tugged on so hard they almost snapped and ever since he makes sure to pull out all the stops to reassure him how much he cares

boston akers:

totally idolises his dads - he picks out clothes in their styles, copies the ways they walk and if he ever gets a good grade at school he races home so that they’re the first people to know about it; their praise means everything to him

it’s not like he goes short of their praise though; they haven’t taught him much magic yet, just the odd training spell here and there, but even in those few lessons they’re both blown away at how quickly he’s able to pick them up 

really headstrong - it’s rare that the kids at school ever pick an argument with him because they’ve learnt that he just refuses to back down from his point - if he believes in something then there’s no changing his mind

aimie akers:

super duper shy - she’s practically hanging on one of her dads’ legs from the second they step out of the front door to the minute they get back - daycare drop-offs are an absolute nightmare for them; the first time they took her it was basically lunch time before the teacher eventually managed to coax her away from them

gets on really well with her twin sister, but, even though she’s the oldest, she’s definitely not the one in charge; elsie just bosses her around all the time - in all fairness though, aimie doesn’t really mind it, she kind of likes not having to make the decisions

has a lot of imaginary friends that she plays with - she doesn’t seem shy at all when she’s playing with her toys and babbling away to them, so her parents are fine with it - well, were fine with it, they’re a bit more dubious about how ‘imaginary’ they are now after darwin caught her chattering to her bookcase and a book sliding off the shelf without her touching it...

elsie akers:

what aimie lacks in socialising skills, elsie has by the bucket load - she loves chatting away to her parents and her older brother, but aimie’s still her favourite target because she does the least amount of talking back

insists on counting all of her stuffed animals before going to bed - if they’re not all there then there’s no way she’s even putting her head on the pillow - and besides, what else is she ever going to use that counting knowledge for??

gets caught playing with her dad’s potion bottles at least once a week - she knows now, well and truly, that she’s not allowed to even be in his potion room, let alone touch the bottles because they’re dangerous, but she can’t help it; the colours are just too pretty!

[singledarkshade]

New Circumstances

Part Three

(Part One and Part Two found here)

 Gideon stared in amazement at the computer setup in front of her, it was like someone had spied on her dreams and made them into reality.

“This is just the initial setup,” Ray said from her side, “You’ll be in control of the entire system, including who is allowed into the base.”

“This is wonderful,” Gideon told him.

Ray grinned, “Save your excitement for what else I have to show you. Follow me.”

Gideon chuckled and let him lead her through the door to the next section of the base.

“There are several offices that can accommodate a few people,” Ray explained as he pointed out several of the doors, “And at the end of the hallway is the conference room.” He didn’t stop and moved further on through the door turning to his right, “Next we have the gym which I wanted to add a swimming pool to but there’s not enough room. The team will have to use the one in the main building.”

“I’m sure they’ll get over it,” Gideon said amused at how upset Ray was at this.

“Anyway,” he continued leading her to a set of stairs, “Up here is a wardrobe room. I’m assuming the team may need specific outfits for different missions. There are also a few rooms with en-suite shower rooms that can be used if they need to work late and don’t want to head home. Or have to clean up.”

Gideon stared at him, “When you said you were giving us a base of operations, I thought it would be a few offices not…”

“What?”

“This,” Gideon laughed, “Ray, this is incredible.”

He gave a bashful smile, “It’s just a start. I’m hoping whoever Joe recruits will give me some ideas for whatever they need and of course you as well as your team.”

“As soon as we hire them,” Gideon reminded him.

Ray shrugged, “I’ve managed to whittle down the list to a few people. Unfortunately, one of my first choices is unlikely to join us as she’s just got engaged.”

“And that is a problem why?”

“Her fiancé is Oliver Queen.”

Gideon nodded, “Ahh, next in line to run Queen Consolidated. Alright what about the others?”

“I have three files for you,” Ray said, “They’re on your system for you to go over once we’re finished the tour.”

Bemused Gideon asked, “What else do you have to show me?”

Ray motioned her to follow him down the stairs and then down another set of stairs, “This,” he said.

Gideon stared in amazement at the cars, vans, motorbikes and even what looked like a mobile lab sitting in front of her. She could also see at the end of the room through a large window there was an armoury.

“Okay,” Gideon laughed, “I am even more impressed, and I really want to drive the silver Mercedes.”

Ray nodded, “Whenever you want as long as it’s for a mission.”

 Gideon took a long drink of coffee as she scanned the files Ray had sent her. Every one of them was qualified for the role but she gravitated to the one who, from what she could tell, would complement rather than just mirror her skills.

Sending out a quick email to Ray to confirm her choice, Gideon then turned her attention to setting up the computer system for the base. She’d have to think up a cool nickname for it at some point.

Ray had made a good start, but Gideon knew she would need a higher-level system for what he wanted it to do.

“Gideon?”

Surprised at the interruption Gideon looked up to find Ray standing there, “Yes?”

“You need to take a break,” he told her, “Come on and I’ll treat you to dinner.”

Gideon hesitated, not sure if it was a good idea to socialise with her boss.

“We can go over the file you sent me,” Ray continued not noticing her hesitation.

“That’s great,” she shut down the computer, “And I can tell you about all the upgrades I’ve implemented.”

                                 *********************************************

 Gideon checked the file once more before she walked towards the man sitting in the reception area. She smiled slightly amused seeing how uncomfortable he looked in the suit he was wearing, while his long dark hair pulled back in a neat ponytail that he kept fiddling with.

“Cisco Ramon?” she said reaching him.

Bouncing to his feet Cisco nodded and offered his hand, “Yes, yes, hi.”

“I’m Gideon Ryder,” she introduced herself, shaking his hand before saying, “Follow me.”

Gideon led him to the private elevator that would take them to Ray’s office where he was waiting. Once they had the base ready there would be a private entrance for the team to use.

Reaching the office Gideon led him to where Ray was sitting waiting for them.

“Hi,” he grinned when he saw them.

“Cisco Ramon, this is Ray Palmer,” Gideon introduced them.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Cisco,” Ray offered his hand, shaking Cisco’s enthusiastically until Gideon pointedly coughed, “Grab a seat.”

“Thank you for coming today,” Gideon took over, before explaining why they’d asked to meet him.

Cisco stared at them once they’d finished.

“I understand if you need to think about this for a while, you are currently employed by Star Labs,” Ray said, “And I know that you’re working on a lot of high profile projects…”

Cisco let out a snort if disgust, “My team leader doesn’t let us do anything remotely interesting. I spent the last month watching the computer beep as it told me the system was not overheating. I’m in.”

   Cisco stared in amazement as Gideon showed him around the base.

“This is fantastic,” he breathed.

Gideon smiled, “I know. From your file it states you create devices and I wanted you to have a lab area. I’ve set it up at the back in the large empty section, out of the way but will allow you access to the main hub easily.”

“We need a cool name for this place,” Cisco told her, “Because ‘The Base’ just doesn’t do it.”

Gideon chucked, “That is exactly what I was thinking.”

“Give me time,” Cisco said, “I’ll think of the perfect name.”

“Then we are going to get along just fine,” Gideon told him.

Cisco grinned back, “Definitely Miss Ryder.”

“And it’s Gideon,” she told him, “We are on a first name basis here.”

He nodded before asking, “So, where’s the rest of the team?”

                                 *********************************************

 Gideon looked up from her screen when she heard Ray’s voice coming towards her, wondering who the man with her boss was.

“Gideon,” Ray beamed, “This is Agent Joe West, our government liaison.”

“It’s nice to meet you finally, Miss Ryder,” Joe said shaking her hand, “You have done amazing work here.”

“Thank you,” Gideon smiled proudly.

“Gideon, can you join us in the conference room?” Ray asked.

With a nod, Gideon saved her work and grabbed her tablet following the two men. She smiled when Ray placed a cup of tea in front of her and handed a mug of coffee to Joe.

“I have the rest of the team selected and agreed upon,” Joe told them, “Which means we can get started once they join us.”

Gideon waited as Joe tried to connect his tablet to the system, after a moment she held out her hand for it. With an annoyed sigh the older man handed it to her, and Gideon quickly fixed it so it would connect automatically from now on.

“There you go,” she smiled, handing it back.

Joe gave her a quick nod before opening the file, a picture showing two women appeared on the screen.

“Agents Alex Danvers and Eve Baxter,” Joe told them, “Both are highly trained in martial arts, weapons and explosives. Agent Danvers is also a biochemical engineer while Agent Baxter specialised in mechanical engineering.”

Ray nodded, “That’s good. What about the more unconventional hire you were trying to get?”

“I spoke with him,” Joe told them, “And he has agreed but he now comes with a partner. So we have two retrieval and infiltration experts.”

Ray shrugged, “That’s good. Who are they?”

Gideon felt her heart stop for a moment at the two people who appeared on the screen before her. The couple she had spent the night with only a few weeks before, who she suspected had stolen from her but never wanted to believe it. Now, as she read their skills in front of her, she couldn’t deny it.

It had been such a nice fantasy that was now gone.

“Rip Hunter and Miranda Coburn,” Joe continued not seeing Gideon’s reaction, “Not their real names but the ones they prefer. Rip I’ve known since he was about eight when he picked my pocket. He is exceptionally good which is why he can work for us as he has no record.”

“And Miranda?” Ray asked.

“His wife,” Joe continued, “They met a few years ago and he will only work with us if she does.”

Ray shrugged, “Is she as good as he is.”

Gideon let out a soft snort but neither man heard her.

“She’s the foster daughter of Damian Darhk,” Joe grimaced, “From the research I’ve done her life with him was not pleasant and when he died took none of the money she should have received. But I’ve also learned she is a gifted grifter and can get people to trust her very easily.”

“That’s true,” Gideon sighed, this time both men heard and turned to her making Gideon wince.

Joe frowned, “What exactly do you mean?”

“I met them the night of the conference,” Gideon stated, “And I was befriended by them. Then they stole from me. They stole the Flash Drive and almost destroyed my career.”

Ray winced, “Gideon, I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

“Miss Ryder,” Joe said softly, “I understand how you must feel about this, but they were hired to steal that information from you. It wasn’t personal.”

“It damn well felt it,” Gideon snapped.

Joe sighed, “I’m sorry, Gideon. I was not aware that you met then when they were hired to steal the data from you. I can understand how upset you must be but…”

“But?” Gideon demanded archly.

“They’re the best,” Joe stated, “And this team need the best to be able to do what we want to do. I wasn’t going to tell you until the full team were here, but our first mission is to retrieve the data stolen from you.”

Gideon stared at the photograph on the screen of the couple whose flattery she’d fallen for and nodded.

“I will work with them, Agent West,” she stated coldly, “But, they answer to me. I run this team and if they get out of line then they’re gone.”

Joe stared at her for a moment before nodded, “Agreed.”

[maydaymemer]

Steam vs. Sledgehammer

Yep it’s time to review two songs in one. My favourite song ever: Steam (yes, Steam), as well as one of the iconic songs of the ‘80s: Sledgehammer. Both by Peter Gabriel, both heavily influenced by funk and both with music videos directed by the late Stephen R. Johnson.

Sledgehammer needs no introduction for anyone over 40, which means it does need an introduction here. The song is the lead single from Peter Gabriel’s 1986 pop opus “So”, and is his only American #1 (it only got to #4 in the UK, which makes me more ashamed to be from here than ever). It’s known for its pioneering stop-motion animated music video which is still well regarded today, heck it kickstarted Aardman’s career before they made Wallace and Gromit. The song is a loving tribute to Gabriel’s favourite funk and Motown songs he listened to in his youth, there’s even a funny anecodote a read about Gabriel in his early days going to a soul cafe or something and being the only white guy there. To be a fly on the wall on that day. Methinks he was there to pick up chicks, not just listen to the music, which only makes me love the guy even more to be honest.

Steam on the other hand I don’t think anyone who isn’t a Gabriel fan remembers. Sure, when it was released in 1992 it was a hit but was generally seen as a Sledgehammer II: Sledge Harder, and didn’t set anyone’s world alight. Plus, people weren’t listening to Peter Gabriel in ‘92, they were bumping Nirvana and Tupac. On the bright side we did get a fucking insane music video which I love showing to people to get a reaction out of them.

One of them highly acclaimed and the other mostly maligned, but both are typically overshadowed by their music videos. I’m here to dig into what makes both these songs great, and why they’re both intelligent, finely crafted pop songs. I’m also going to note the similarities between the two, and why I think Steam was a more than worthy follow up.

Let’s get down to the start of both songs. Sledgehammer begins with a synthesised flute that goes on for about 15 seconds, before launching into an opening tune that knocks you right off your seat like, well a sledgehammer. This sets up an appropriate atmosphere for a song that combines the clever soul with the sexy sounds of the ‘80s to create a song that transcends past dated into just a banging tune that holds up today. The song has an excellent bassline and feels simply big. Then we get Gabriel coming in with a prolonged “Heeeeeeey” followed up with a more muffled “tell me how have you been?” to take us into the first verse. The song sets a mood and it sets it well, this is bouncy and fun Peter Gabriel, not weird psycho Peter Gabriel (which is pretty much his default).

Steam, on the other hand, doesn’t introduce itself. The song just abruptly bursts into your door after a short bassline with the distinct drum and bassline with all sorts of sounds flung at you. Horns, electric guitar, you name it. Gabriel yells “Stand back! Stand back!” And you almost think “yeah maybe I should I shouldn’t really argue with Peter Gabriel”, especially in the video where he’s wearing a pimp suit to accompany this. He continues, shouting “what are these dogs doing sniffing at my feet? / They’re onto something picking up / picking up / this heat”. I still have no idea what this intro means, but then we transition into the abolsutely magnificent instrumented chorus as Peter sings “Give me Steam / and how you feel can make it real / real as anything you’ve seen / get a life / with the dreamer’s dream”. I’ve heard reviewers call this song overproduced, and I would agree the song is very maximal in terms of production, but I wouldn’t remove one instrument. The song’s various mood changes from chorus to verse to pre-and-post choruses take me where the song wants me to go emotionally every time. I find the “Give me Steam” part specifically to be rather exciting and really impressed me the first time I listened to this song, last year I believe, and it still impresses me now.

This is where we take a look at the verse structure of both songs, which are pretty much the same not just within the songs but between them. The first verses of both set up two metaphors:

“You could have a steam train / if you just lay down your tracks

You could have an aeroplane flying / if you bring your blue sky back” - From Sledgehammer

“You know your culture from your trash

You know your plastic from your cash” - From Steam

Peter then connects these to the message of the song at the end of the verse:

“All you do is call me

I’ll be anything you need” - Sledge

“Whenever heavens doors are shut / you get* them open but / I know you” - Steam (alright I’m cheating here, that’s three metaphors, but this illustrates my point better)

So as you can see this is where the two songs split off. Sure both include Peter’s patented silly sex puns, a Sledgehammer is long and hard while Steam is hot and wet, but the meanings of each song is different.

For Sledgehammer the song is about how sex can be used to communicate and brighten up the mood of someone where words simply can’t help. The philosophy of the song is that sometimes you just need some fuck. I imagine a narrative where maybe Peter and this lady friend he’s talking to through the song have just broken off some long term relationship, and they’re very good friends so they spend some time together playing with her bumper cars and his big dipper to take their minds off it. The song isn’t really about love, it’s about having fun, but as I illustrated with my interpretation it’s not about sex with someone you don’t love it’s about sex with someone you’re not IN love with. So kind of a FWB/rebound kind of thing, though not a romcom version where they get together in the third act. It’s a very different approach to an ‘Intercourse with You’ song and told in a very fun way. The song has a bounce to it and a sort of mature naivety, Peter comes across as genuinely joyful to the woman he’s narrating too, they aren’t using eachother but they’re not in a serious relationship either. Good stuff, Pete.

Steam on the other hand is about the relationship, it’s about that spark and connection with someone. Specifically it’s about a relationship where the woman is cultured, sophisticated and generally a classy lady but Peter isn’t. He’s talking himself down, except for one subject: when it comes to the lady, he knows her better than she does and that’s the most important thing of all. Maybe he knows how to please her, maybe he knows her deepest depths, maybe it’s both but the songwriting illustrates that Peter is just in awe of this woman and she might not be in awe of herself just yet. I always interpreted this as Peter writing about a relationship between classes, but in a smarter way than say Billy Joel. Peter grew up middle class but in this song it’s like he’s putting himself in the shoes of a working class guy who’s in a relationship with someone who should be out of his league, but perhaps because of those virtues have led to him knowing how to socialise he can get the depths of her heart better jan a thousand potential rich suitors and their relationship just works. I’m being a bit old school with the picture I’m painting but a genuinely smart way of basically writing Opposites Attract but without the cartoon cat (instead we get a CGI Peter Gabriel Chair, perhaps that’s not the best trade off). That’s why I love it so much, it writes a geniunely smart love song about a relationship working despite the differences which a lot of songs do but they never go into why they work together. Peter explains that while he can’t know a lot about art or money he does know a lot about humanity (and sex, as Sledge shows).

The rest of the verses follow this same formula, I’ll close the review by pointing out how the finales of both songs basically are the same again.

With the finale of Sledgehammer Gabriel refers to “shedding his skin”. He then says “this is the new stuff”, which probably sounds like a birthday suit reference to you but I have a more indirect interpretation. What I love about the line is that in a way it’s Gabriel saying “I’m the shit!”, predicting that the song will become ‘the new stuff’ as it did. Which is why it’s one of the things I do prefer over Steam, which goes for a more obvious orgasm innuendo:

“Roomshake, earthquake

Find a way to stay awake

It’s gonna blow, it’s gonna break

This is more than I can take!”

Tho back to praising Steam, it is my favourite song after all, I think that song does pace itself better. Steam is a minute longer and has way more variety, with a lot of change ups with an occasional pre-chorus peppered in. It’s a longer song that feels shorter and endlessly replayable. Granted a listen to both of these songs an unhealthy amount of times, so I wouldn’t recommend any of you reading this skip out on them. Listen to them however you can, they’re a great time. Heck, buy the albums they come from because the rest of the songs on there are great too.

Thanks for reading this review. It’s a very quick one drafter of hopefully many that I’m posting to sharpen my writing skills. Hope you enjoyed and I’ll make sure to improve these over time. I have ideas for little bite size and more cohesive reviews of the following songs: Uh Huh, Girl, Babooshka

*note: thought he sung “kick” but apparently not. Personally I think “kick” has a better kick to it, funny enough, in terms of annunciation.

[bae-leth]

Hey, hey, if you’re doing headcanon requests then I absolutely wanna hear your headcanons for Dimitri and Felix back when they were kids. How they met, how their relationship was like growing up, that kinda thing!

crawls out of bed.

did you say…. felix and dimitri??? Oh…..oh gosh. it seems like…. my hands are moving of their own accord …. you have Awakened me, anon….

(disclaimer: JKSDJHF THIS GOT SO LONG, I GOT REALLY CARRIED AWAY,,, OH DEAR)

Felix did not want to be Dimitri’s friend at first.

Dimitri was so… excitable. Constantly smiling, horribly popular, and so happy. Felix felt tired whenever he so much as looked at the young prince.

Why would he need the prince as a friend, anyway? Sure, he’d be a useful connection, but Felix couldn’t see how exactly he was meant to approach him.

Flattery? False affections? Lies? No, thanks. So much effort - and for what? He’d much rather stay away.

So when the king holds a social gathering for all the nobles in the kingdom, and all the other noble kids decide to flock around the prince and completely block off the food table, it’s safe to say that Felix is annoyed.

He just wants the sandwiches, but noo, the prince has to attract a fanclub? And leave him hungry? Fantastic.

So he just stays back and sulks. All he wants is some food so he won’t starve, but’s stopping him? Oh, that’s right. The prince! Grrr.

Felix’s parents try to get him to socialise with the others, but he’s having none of it. He hasn’t had much luck with friends before (something about his moodiness? They called him moody -) and he doesn’t need them now. He prefers to be alone, you know?

So he escapes from the ballroom (without any food :( ), and ends up in the castle gardens to contemplate.

(What’s with this weird twinge in his chest when he thinks about friends, anyway? It’s annoying. He doesn’t like it.)

Just as he’s about to doze off on the garden bench, Felix is suddenly jerking upright, because he’s hearing the tell-tale sounds of wood clashing with wood.

He follows the sound, somewhat apprehensively, and who does he find? None other than the prince himself, slashing away at a training dummy with ferocious determination!

Felix is actually kind of impressed at his stamina (read: kind of. Only kind of) and ends up watching him for quite some time - that is, until Dimitri spots him and waves him over.

Felix goes ‘ABORT ABORT ABORT HE FOUND ME’ in his head, but stays put as the prince marches over to him.

Dimitri: Hello! I haven’t seen you before. :D Would you like to spar with me?

Felix, internally: LET ME SHOW YOU HOW IT’S DONE

Felix, externally: Sure. I’ll beat you anyway!

So they spar, and for some reason, Felix really wants to impress the other boy. So, once he finds an opening, he rushes forward with all his strength…

… and he hits Dimitri so hard he stumbles and falls awkwardly, with a sickening crunch and a cry of pain.

Felix is internally panicking. Like, PANICKING.

Dimitri is suppressing tears on the floor, and Felix is just standing there, frozen, going “OH GOD I KILLED THE PRINCE?? AM I GOING TO GET EXECUTED??? IS HE OKAY???”

The guards rush over when they hear Felix yelling, and they take the prince to the infirmary. Felix gets the scolding of his life from his parents, but the pounding in his ears means that he barely listens to them.

His real fear is what’ll happen to him when he sets foot in the castle again. He’s only a kid, but they’re going to banish him, aren’t they? Is he going to find the prince dying? Dead? 

He’s doomed, so utterly doomed -

This is literally the most he’s ever messed up, ever -

Before he knows it, he’s being brought before the king. The king is stern and intimidating, and as coolly as Felix tries to conduct himself, he’s still a child, so he’s quaking.

Dimitri is sat next to the king, arm in a sling. Hey, at least he’s not dead? Still, he looks so impassive…

The king asks him what happened. Not aggressively, but just in a low tone. Felix takes a deep breath, and prepares to apologise profusely and maybe try to salvage his own life

when, out of nowhere, Dimitri cuts in, and proclaims that it was all his fault.

Dimitri: Father, it was me. I tripped and fell. Felix was only trying to help me, I promise!

Felix: ??? (WHAT ARE YOU DOING????)

The king asks them again, but Dimitri persists, and finally the king relents. He gets up, tells his son to be more careful, and tells Felix to enjoy the rest of his stay.

Felix is just like ??????!?!?!?!?!?!? now. Why on earth would Dimitri cover him? He literally broke his arm!

Felix expresses this when they get out of earshot of the throne room.

F: Why’d you help me out back there? I don’t even know you!

D: What do you mean? You’re my new friend - of course I had to help you :D (don’t worry about my dad, he’s a big softie really, he just looks like that when he scrunches up his eyebrows, blah blah blah blah blah….)

In the middle of Dimitri’s rambling, Felix shortcircuits, because???? ‘Friend’??? ‘NEW friend’??? What??? WHat?? Wha-

Felix can’t wrap his head around it. Dimitri wants to be his friend?? Genuinely?? Even though he knocked him to the floor???

(Why does this make him feel so warm??)

Felix decides he should at least say thank you. So, he goes out, makes (yes, makes) an entire batch of sweets, and yeets them at Dimitri the next time they see each other. 

Dimitri only smiles widely, and eats three of them in one go, telling Felix that they’re delicious, and when is he making more? He knows someone who’d love them, and he wants to eat more too, and -

Felix smiles, too, and from then on, a beautiful friendship is born.

They become as thick as thieves, and they run off everywhere. The guards hate them.

In their childhood years, Dimitri’s usually the one who’s dragging Felix toplaces. Not much responsibility yet = more fun!

Felix has to chase after him to make sure he’s not hurt. He’s still kinda wary after the sparring incident, and since Dimitri is as reckless as a boar, he’s resigned himself to making sure his new friend(!) doesn’t go off and lose an eye, or whatever.

Lots and lots of winter activities!

One time, Dimitri convinces him that they’re totally skilled enough to make their own toboggan. (They’re not.)

They make one that’s tiny, and Dimitri says that they can both go on it together, because it’ll be much more fun!

(They crash into a boulder instead, but hey, at least no one’s crying this time?)

They enjoy ice skating, too. Ingrid and Sylvain get dragged along to these - Ingrid is terrible at balancing, but Sylvain is surprisingly great at it.

Faerghus’ Christmas markets are the best thing ever. Authentic hot chocolate, tons of colourful stalls, snow falling thickly and late into the night, faint music ever present in the distance… When they’re open, the duo spend lots of their evening free time there.

Snowball fights. So many snowball fights. They come in afterwards tracking snow throughout the entire castle, and the maids want to cry.

Over time, Felix realises that he is really, really enjoying his friendship with Dimitri. A lot. A bit too much? No - this is fine! This is fine, and he couldn’t be happier.

(ofc, he doesn’t express this out loud, but Dimitri seems like he knows, so…? maybe he doesn’t have to???)

However, as they get older,  Dimitri slowly realises that he has take on more responsibilities and get into Proper Prince Mode in order to win court favour. He’s not cute and smol anymore, and the court won’t take too kindly to him if he continues ignoring his ‘duty’ forever.

Felix understands. He’s the son of a Duke, how could he not?

It doesn’t mean he likes it, though. He hates it, actually. Anything that’d change Dimitri’s beaming grin into a worn and weary expression is something that he’ll hate with a passion.

So! As Dimitri becomes more solemn and more withdrawn, taking on more princely duties, Felix eventually goes ‘fuck it’ and decides to go ham. He’s only a noble, not a prince, so it shouldn’t be that much of a deal.

He’s doing it not only to make Dimitri smile genuinely again, but also because he knows that the prince is bound to look better next to him in comparison. Two for the price of one!

(NOT THAT HE’D EVER TELL ACTUALLY TELL DIMITRI THIS. SSH. FOR ALL INTENTS AND PURPOSES, FELIX JUST LIKES BEING AN ASSHOLE)

Dimitri becomes the one having to put up with Felix’s tomfoolery and chase him down every time he decides to do, well, anything.

Felix starts to challenge everyone. Ambassadors’ sons, counts, foreign dignitaries … Dimitri is just there going ‘NOOOOOOOO’ and pulling him back by the collar.

Felix is also super straightforward when he’s talking, which Dimitri needs, because he’s the type to make the other person feel marginally better even if their ideas are terrible.

Dimitri: The trade routes you’re proposing aren’t too bad. There might be some improvement needed, but on the whole, they are actually -

Felix: nah they suck lmao

Felix is constantly looking for more daring things to do. Constantly.

F: What would happen if I stole those drumsticks?

D: Felix, no

F: FELIX YES

No matter how hard Felix tries, though, Dimitri gets more and more stressed anyway. His duties pile up and up, and the looming weight of the crown makes him more anxious and self conscious, even though he’s trying his best to exceed the expectations placed on him.

Felix sees this (age 15 or so) and is like. Bitch. Bitch no. Bitch not again. BITCH

So he ups his game, and starts dragging Dimitri back to their favourite haunts - the ones they didn’t have time to go to anymore. NO MORE STUDYING FOR THE PRINCE.

They spend long Faerghus winters doing Everything. Once, they made a snowman in the shape of a particularly snobby Leicester noble and nearly got their heads chopped off for it (he really was ugly, okay??)

Felix gets yelled at constantly for distracting the prince, but does he care? No. Not at all.

(The guards love them, just because they’re so entertaining.)

One time, Dimitri offhandedly tells him about another noble boy their age who was giving him trouble. He’d called him weak and pathetic, and unfit to take the throne, and something else that Dimitri doesn’t want to disclose.

Felix takes one look at Dimitri’s sad smile (that - that bastard made him believe it?) and his mind goes blank. He spins on his heel, and walks off without a word.

He comes back half an hour later sporting a bruised lip. Later, news arrives that the other boy was found bawling in the kitchen, with two black eyes.

Dimitri berates Felix for it for ages (“Why would you do that? I told you it was nothing!”), but he’s touched, too. Felix takes all the blame in the ensuing outcry, and gets aptly punished, but he doesn’t regret it. The guy was a right prick. The black eyes probably make him more attractive now.

Felix openly calls Dimitri a boar in court. His parents sport thunderstruck expressions every time, but Dimitri just beams.

But yes… Felix always makes sure that Dimitri is happy. He covers it up with a lot of insults and snark, but he’s always got his best interests at heart (even though he’s terrible at showing it.)

Before they go to the Officers Academy, Dimitri tells him that he knew what he’d been doing the entire time, and really appreciates it. 

He then goes on to say that Felix is the most precious friend he’s ever had, and he wouldn’t trade him for the world.

… with that exact wording. My god.

Naturally, Felix gets embarrassed. “Why are you so sappy?” he grumbles, cheeks pink. Then, Dimitri hugs him very hard, and Felix goes FUUUUUUUU and short circuits because sahgdsag this is the nicest hug he’s ever gotten????? It’s really nice?????

Of course, he’s not telling Dimitri any of this. Instead, he pretends to be annoyed and punches the prince in the shoulder, before they start to discuss what the future has in store for them.

[transformers-extrication]

Ratcheeet! Info below!

Might as well have created dry wit.

His grumpy snark has been mistaken for irreverent behaviour before. And while his bedside manner is a bit irreverent, he most definitely takes serious matters to Spark even if he sounds flippantly rude.

Sportier than he looks, or more accurately he can throw damn far and damn hard as the ‘disrespectful’ will soon find out.

Tough, no-nonsense hardass.

On the outside.

He actually really enjoys socialising, parties and letting loose for a little fun.

Aromantic - Relationships just never tickled his fancy and he’s never pursued one.

His back plates were already strong but during the war, they’ve been fortified and are almost like an irremovable shield.

Skywarp once shot himself in the shoulder after trying to shoot Ratchet in the back and the blast ricocheted back at him. The memory of that still gives Ratchet a good chuckle to this day.

Met Optimus Prime waaaay back on Cybertron after accidentally giving him a concussion.

It was an accident he swears! He was a trainee medic in ‘school’ and angrily gesturing as he spoke to another person while holding a wrench in one hand. He didn’t mean to let the object slip out his hand, and he definitely wasn’t aiming for the quiet red and blue kid across the hall.

Thankfully Orion took it well and they became friends after that.

Handles high-grade like a champ, but he doesn’t drink often on account of usually if someone else is drunk they’re going to cause themselves an injury and of course, it’ll fall to him to fix it. Idiots.

Can be found asleep curled up in a ball.

No, it doesn’t matter how funny you think it’ll be you can’t roll him down a hill when he’s curled up like that.

Does not have time for bullshit. Don’t even try it.

Ain’t no quitter.

When Megatron shot him on the ship he only destroyed his shoulder and half his arm, he merely fell back and was knocked unconscious by the addition of the fall.

Tried desperately to help fix Optimus but the combination of his own injuries needing to be fixed and his inability to see straight, turned out the fall messed up his visual sensors too, he wasn’t able to help in repairs.

Spent the rest of the Unicron wars in a bit of an angry self-imposed solitude. He didn’t stop in his duties at all but he closed off emotionally.

Ironhide gifted him a scarf when he was alive. He keeps it safe in a box as a memento.

Gets on famously with Kup.

Due to not being the most apt when it comes to actual fighting, his skill in hand-to-hand can use work and he wouldn’t place himself any higher than anyone else with firearms training.

That leads him to feel expendable.

Optimus was usually the one who helped him out when he had these ‘expendable’ moments, but without him, he kinda fell into a bit of a slump prompting him to become very ‘background’ which lead to First Aid and Wreck-Gar practically taking over for all the main/major medical duties. He was still classed as the CMO however.

Has an impressive death glare.

Was as shocked as anyone when First Aid died, especially as he got the joy of examining the messy, panicked and rather inexperienced method in which he was killed.

Ended up being shouldered with the grieving Protectobots and had to have a long talk with them when they asked him to join their team that they can’t just try and smother over their pain by dragging him into their team. Also, he didn’t want to be a leg.

[ships-for-you]

Unfortunately, I can’t tag this person. I’m sorry!😰

Note: I made this longer than how I normally write to compensate for my absence.

For Black Butler, I ship you with

Ronald Knox!

You two would’ve met under peculiar circumstances.

You had sadly passed in your past life caused by suicide.

And now, you’re being punished for dying too early.

You once worked alongside a tall man named William T. Spears for a few months since you passed the training program and are now being formally taught by your superiors.

It had been a considerable amount of time since then, and you had been working on your own.

You enjoyed being alone and occasionally chatting with your co-workers until he came along.

Honestly, ever since he joined the dispatch, he’s been flirting non-stop with the females of your group.

Not to mention, a certain someone that you once tried courting but wasn’t interested you, he managed to snag her too!

Besides, it’s as if he doesn’t even show up to the dispatch to work.

Just to flirt.

It doesn’t help that he works under you therefore whenever he doesn’t do his job, you work overtime to pay for his mistakes.

But it’s fine, as long as it saves your co-worker the stress of overtime.

Even if you end up with it, it’s just in your personality. Too nice! You have my respect.

And that has taken a toll on you.

You even screamed at William and Grell once for simply greeting you.

Coffee doesn’t work since you’re not human anymore.

Any type of caffeine doesn’t.

So one day, Ronald came to apologise. Of course, not on his own accord but because he was told to do so.

He hasn’t seen you in so long because you’ve been out most of the time trying to reap more souls in order to compensate for what he couldn’t do.

When he opened the door to your office, he saw the mounds of paperwork.

He laughed a bit and then just set the water that he had brought with him beside you.

When you turned to look at him, that’s where he saw the messy state you were in.

Messy hair, glasses fogged and slightly out of place, eyes bloodshot and the obvious darkened callous spot on your middle finger from writing so much.

You muttered a small “thank you” and continued writing your reports. That was when he felt as if he truly respected you.

He did respect you for your work, how efficient it was,

Not to mention, his higher-up is pretty hot. Of course he respected you but only now did he feel guilty for his actions.

“I’ll help you.” “There is nothing for you to help with.” “I’ll do my job properly this time.” “Alright.”

Needless to say after this interaction, you’ve become close friends.

Occasionally having playful banters in the office or sharing slightly suggestive jokes to one another.

You usually go reaping together whenever your targets are close together.

Would visit each other’s quarters and homes whenever you wanted.

Practically living-off on one another.

The, “Work-Husband-and-Wife” type of partnership.

Most people don’t understand your relationship but do at the same time.

It’s pretty...interesting.

For Free, I ship you with Rei Ryugazaki!

I would imagine you meeting during one of their practice sessions.

Is it wrong that I find you being closely acquainted with Haru?

Anyway, being a close acquaintance to him and practically being his second mother, you would visit him at school.

One time, you remembered Haru doesn’t eat much at school and he informed you that he would have practice later.

So you went to Iwatobi and packed food that would be good enough for at least 3 people, in case someone didn’t have any either.

Not many joined the swim team, as Haru said.

So you didn’t expect a lot of people being there.

You didn’t expect to see a really cute girl with a red high ponytail.

And you didn’t expect to see a fellow glasses character with you.

Your eyes met and you simply smiled and made your way to Haru who seemed to have a little picnic with Makoto and his other friends.

“Hey Haru, you didn’t pack lunch right? Do you think this enough? Do your friends have food? Uh, hey you! Do you have food with yo—“ “Yes, this is enough. Thank you (y/n).”

You would sit down with the team and tell jokes to one another. “Hey! Did you hear about that one deaf guy that got run-over by a car?” “No.” “Ah, well don’t worry! He didn’t either.😏”

Rei laughed the hardest in all honesty. The joke was directed to Haru because you tried to make him laugh. He only scoffed.

After eating and resting for a short while, they got back to training and occasionally abandoning the rules of swimming to have fun instead.

“Oi, Nagisa! Don’t you da-“ “Sorry Rei-chan! It’s so funny to see you embarrassed!”

It’s almost endearing how close they are. Like a whole family.

Not long after, Rei, whom you found out to be the glasses boy, quickly said goodbye and rushed out of the area as quickly as possible.

“What’s up with him?” “We don’t know, we thought that maybe he had a high-maintenance girlfriend or something...” “I’ve always cirwed Rei as the type to be weakened by love.” “Don’t worry, we’ll get him to focus and have fun again! “

You, alongside Gou, compiled books to help strengthen Rei’s love for his partner.

And turns out, you were both wrong.

He didn’t have a partner

Turns out, he’s actually trying to pay-favours from the track team.

You were slightly worried for his well-being and decided to visit the gang after shook every other day.

You oaccasuonally hanging out with the guys and at your house.

You being an absolute doll and making them their favorite food.

You’ve become closer to Rei throughout these hangouts.

You felt as if you could debate about anything to help keep your reading skills sharp.

Especially when it came to the topic of the superficial.

You two would end up to be the closes of friends.

And who knows? Maybe even partners

I know I’d be jealous

For Diabolik Lovers, I ship you with KarlHeinz!

(Key: Art - Is a vampire’s personal blood-bag and plaything. Can be used solely for feeding and/or pleasurable activities. Of human race or a hybrid of a supernatural being. Occasionally, however rarely, utilised solely for companionship.)

Where to even start?

It all started at a ball. A grand ball that was held by the Demon Lord himself to commemorate his daughter Cordelia’s coming of age day. She was the illegitiamate daughter of the king however, he has decided that it would only be appropriate to honor a celebration to her. Not having proper guidance from her family, it was only natural that she did not know what to do therefore she relied on her art, you, to guide her and inform her about the social standing of majority of the nobles at the ball.(reference from Blood Bank haha)

She surveyed the area and chatted with you when it was absolutely necessary. You, being very knowledgable with the state of the kingdom and yet being highly insecure, could only utter short but brief answers to her queries. You took note of the celebration’s schedule and took out your pocket watch. You glanced at the orchestra and decided that she had merely an hour an a half before the waltz would commence. You encouraged her to socialise with the men and find a suitable conversational partner to dance with. She nodded her head and dismissed you without a second thought. You adjusted your glasses that seemed to have slid down your nose bridge a bit and fixed your long brown hair. In times like this, you wished she had a suitable figure to guide and educate her of the importance of her postition. You worried for her future and her outlook of her situation that would soon affect her decisions in the following events of her life. What she should be trained for, the common good of her future kingdom, the proper way to lead her people. Instead, she had a dead mistress for a mother and a passive deadbeat for a father.

You decided to merely cling to the walls of the ballroom once the first dance had started. Your mistress had surely acquired a partner to dance with and you decided that it would be best for you to simply observe rather than partake in the celebratory dance. Walking alongside the woman who was envied by all was enough to redirect the attention towards yourself and you had enough of the spotlight.

As you were worriedly keeping a watchful eye on your mistress, a tall man had approached you.

This man had the most devious look on his face. Given the material and craftsmanship of his robes, he must’ve been of royal blood-line. ‘A vampire perhaps?’ You started to deduce him, he seemed like a very knowledgable young man. A man that seemed to make sure he gets what he wants no matter who he needs to step on, no matter who he needs to take advantage of. Surely he had the riches and the charm, most especially the charm. He seemed like the type of man to solely rely on logic and not so much on the probability of anything happening. A very calculating character, isn’t he? Your mind thought of all those under the vampire race and had settled on the conclusion that this charming young man was none other than KarlHeinz.

“Good evening, my lady.” He greeted, his voice surprisingly deep for his age. He bowed slightly whilst you curtsied. “Good evening, my Lord. How may I be of service?” You questioned with your voice slightly shaking, surely he wasn’t the type to start idle chatter without an ulterior motive. “What is a charming young woman such as yourself doing alone at the King’s ball? Surely you must have an acquaintance or a lover nearby to keep you company.” He laid a gentle kiss on your backhand and looked in to your eyes. He truly meant what he had said. Such beauty manifested in a mere mortal’s body. He could sense an inquisitive however slightly anxious nature surrounding you. And the scent of your blood was absolutely intoxicating, you were most likely sold from the finest of curators. Surely his prescience should not affect you this much. You seemed like a very interesting pawn to be utilised in his game and he would ensure that you will aid him in pursue of his experiments.

He decided to keep this conversation going. He took note of how you fidgeted on the sleeves of your dark blue gown and how your lenses have fogged up slightly due to the warmth radiating from your face caused by the inability to carry out such conversations with a person you had barely known. You exchanged minimal information about each other. He understood your humor for play on words and you understood his cunning personality. He appreciated your interest in the supernatural nature and he came to be interested in your motherly and caring personality. Perhaps you have thought wrong about him? Perhaps he was a very caring young man who would ensure that his partner would be spoiled with the affection and wealth that he will share with her. Given your conversations, he seemed to have been of high caliber and had attained good education. Perhaps he could be a suitable suitor for your mistress? You only desired the best for her.

You had introduced him to your mistress and you could tell merely by the way she looked at him, your companion had found the one that would guide her and mold her in to the greatness that she will become. She would be lead by him and be taught to be devoted to this powerful man and hopefully have a suitable family that will treat her with only the best.

Sadly, you were wrong. The debonair man that had talked to you in such a caring and gentle manner was long gone in Cordelia’s presence and only became the cause of her life to spiral in to this debacle she was in. His influence was the opposite of what you had expected of him when it came to caring for her. If you had just knew, you would have interfered. Then your mistress wouldn’t have turned in to this horrible being that she is now. Your “nephews” wouldn’t have been in such shock to harm their mental state. And most certainly but not regretfully, you wouldn’t have been the only proper parental figure of his 6 sons.

[scripttorture]

So in case of all these child soldier/spy/assassin/superweapon scenarios, if one wants an effective fighter out of them, is it best for the villainous organization that usually is kidnapping all these kids to treat the children nicely? Even if it turns out the organization is actually terrible and does terrible things to people outside it, I'm afraid that if I write it it comes off as glorifying to child soldiers? "They are treated lovingly there~"

Is it easier for a “faux-loving cultist organization raised a child soldier” character to reintegrate into society if she was taken around 10, then escaped at 20/25, and has a sister she knows and loves from childhood and who supports her? Is it possible that she never fully integrates or integrates in a very long time period (decades) but can interact comfortably with a small group of (5-7) people she trusts? Does any of this change if her spouse in the cult abused her when she tried to leave?

There’s quite a lot to this one. (I also wrote out an answer assuming these were two parts of the same ask and it has belatedly occurred to me that they could be seperate asks. I’ve left the original answer as it stands and I hope that’s alright.)

When it comes to whether a piece of fiction handles a delicate topicpoorly- well I think that’s very subjective. I try not to tell people what towrite because I know an awful lot depends on the execution, on how it’s written.

I make exceptions for fictional scenarios that are both unrealistic and encourage real life torture.

I’ve also made a couple of case-by-case exceptions based on prettydetailed scenarios that had multiple, connected issues. I usually only say ‘no’to those if the asker comes across as unwilling to think about what they’reactually writing and the real people affected by the issues they’re planning totackle. I don’t get that impression from your ask at all.

I don’t personally like these sorts of child soldier stories very much.That doesn’t mean that they can’t bewell written or that they can’t be respectful, and I try to keep my personaltaste out of my answers as much as possible.

I think a lot of good writing is about balancing different elementssuccessfully. What I’m getting from this ask is that you’re unsure how tobalance the idea that this character’s trainers were kind to her directly withthe fact that their overall actions are abusive.

That’s a good question.

A book I acquired recently compares it to grooming and I think that’s agood comparison. This sort of manipulation is selfish, exploitative and oftenhugely damaging to the victim.

But it works because in large part that’s not how the victim sees thesituation at the time.

It’s not ‘just’ kindness. It’s the fact that these people makethemselves the central (or even only) positive social contact in the victim’slife. One of the common abbreviations for this sort of process should help makeit a little clearer: ICURE- Isolate from their previous environment, Controlwhat they perceive, increase Uncertainty about previous beliefs/values, useRepetition to instil new beliefs/values, manipulate Emotions to weaken formervalues and strengthen new ones.

In your story the character is isolated from a pretty young age. At thatsort of age it is easier to convincesomeone their old family has rejected them, stopped looking for them, doesn’tlove them anymore. And once convinced of that the conditional ‘kindness’ of thecult becomes very attractive indeed.

I actually left my family and country at roughly the same age as yourcharacter (less dramatic than it sounds). It can really knock your world view and sense of self. Many of thechildren at the school I was in were in a similar position. Some reallystruggled. Some thrived.

I remember being extremely susceptible to new ideas and not beingparticularly critical. I was incredibly isolated and looking for something toconnect to- fortunately most of what I found was world mythology.

My point is that given the situation she’s been forced into I don’tthink it would be unreasonable for your character to bond with her captors,accept their beliefs and go along with their training in return for affection,a positive social circle and their conditional kindness.

The thing with a set up like this is that the kindness is conditional on her obedience.

Growing up like this she will have seen the social consequences ofdisobeying; isolation, censure, ridicule, bullying. She’ll have been taughtthat love is a reward for ‘good’ behaviour.

Since you have both the groupdoing awful things and the character leaving the group I don’t think younecessarily have to worry about glorifying child soldiers. It sounds to me asif you’ve given the whole scenario a fair bit of thought and that’s always agreat first step.

However if you want to add more from the character’s childhood then I’dsuggest showing a child who didn’t do as well as she did. Perhaps they clung tothe idea of their old family, or perhaps they just weren’t as good at doingwhat the organisation wanted.

Beating them or killing them would hinder this sort of organisation andrisk any ‘progress’ made with the other children. Instead you might see thingslike…forbidding the other children to talk to this child for several days,ritually humiliating them in front of the rest of the ‘class’. Or the sortof…group recrimination that’s sometimes used in China, with the ‘teacher’making the other children stand in a circle around the targeted child andencouraging them to take turns to tell the victim their ‘faults’.

That’s incredibly intimidating and emotional for adults. For a childwithout any outside emotional support I think it would be pretty damn terrible.I’d be incredibly surprised if a child that age and under that pressure didn’tburst into tears. You could use that to illustrate that these aren’t nicepeople and perhaps witnessing something like that could influence yourcharacter’s decision to leave later.

Some of the factors you’ve mentioned around her escaping wouldprobably help but others might not.

Having someone who does genuinelylove and support her would make a huge difference to her mental health andemotional wellbeing. That in turn would help her…..not necessarily‘re-integrate’ but re-adjust to life outside the group.

I don’t think her age when sheescapes would make much difference. It’s hard to tell and some people put morestock in ‘youth’ as a measure of how well people adapt than others.

I think the age she’s taken wouldmake a difference. Ten is more than old enough to remember her life before she was forced to become asoldier. That would almost certainly help.

But reintegrating into society is a tricky business. It requires…well itrequires society accepting a formerchild soldier back into society. They need to be able to socialise with peoplenormally, get jobs, access opportunities. They need to believe they have anhonest shot at happiness in ordinary mainstream society.

That’s often tricky in the real world because many ordinary people are naturally rather afraid of individualswho fought with the terrorists that were shooting at them yesterday. That’scompounded by the lack of education child soldiers receive; they often don’t know how to do anything beyondfight and if they can’t get a decent job or a chance to catch up on theschooling they missed then they’re oftentargeted by criminal gangs who want to make use of their ‘skills’. And lack ofchoice.

From her end I’d say she’s got a much better chance than many real lifechild soldiers: she has a good support network and society isn’t totally new toher.

But that’s really not the only factor at play. The environment she’strying to integrate into also matters a lot.

I’d say both the scenarios you suggest (never entirely re-integrating orre-integrating very gradually over decades) are possible. You might also wantto think about what integrating back into society means.

There are plenty of people who function perfectly well day-to-day intheir society but are arguably not ‘fully integrated’. People who don’t speakthe majority language for example. They arecut off from certain opportunities and social events, but that doesn’tnecessarily mean they aren’t leading happy lives.

Once again positive social circles are the key.

What does ‘fully integrated’ mean to you, your story and your character?She’s probably not going to berunning for political office within a year. On the other hand she might well beable to interact positively with a small group of friends, perform small-scaleinteractions like buying things from the shops and hold occasional jobs.

The situation you’re suggesting seems reasonable to me. I guess what I’msaying is does it matter to the story if your character still has ‘weird’ingrained behaviours decades later? If she’s not hurting anyone and managesmost everyday things do her mental health problems (or difficulty graspingmainstream culture) automatically mean she’s not fully integrated?

Because by that logic I’m notfully integrated into British society, and I do alright.

Consider what she needs to beable to do versus what’s considered ‘normal’ by the society around her. Andfocus on the first category to figure out what sort of help she’ll actuallyneed over time.

Having a small close friendship group sounds reasonable and realistic tome. Difficulty trusting and interacting with people would be common for someonecoming out of the extremely isolated environment she’s been in.

It would be important that she doesn’t feel judged by these people and,given the environment she’s come out of, it would probably be important to herthat they listen to and respect her opinions and desires, instead of trying toimpose their own on her. She might respond particularly negatively to thingsthat are supposed to be gentle hints or attempts to persuade her to change hermind.

Lastly- I thinking having someone (spouse or not) from the cult abuseher when she tries to leave is actually incredibly realistic and in keepingwith how these sorts of groups behave.

But yes, it probably would make things more difficult for her.

That said, I’m not sure it would change your overall timescale for herrecovery. You’ve set a reasonably cautious pace and that’s a very good thing. Once again having thesupport of her sister would make a huge difference.

I’m not particularly knowledge about the long term effects of spousalabuse so I’m going to leave it at that. Scripttraumasurvivors has some verygood pieces on spousal abuse and looking through their tags could help you dealwith that aspect specifically.

You mightfind this BBC article by a woman who was raised in a ‘cult’ useful. Obviouslyshe wasn’t trained as a soldier but she talks a little about the process ofleaving her community and trying to fit in to mainstream society. I think thatcould be useful for your story.

Child Soldiers International also has some resources about reintegratingchild soldiers into society. Keep in mind the differences between what you’rewriting and the cases they’re discussing though, some of what they describewill be due to a community that’s hugely aware of and fighting these armedgroups. That might not be the case in your story.

Thisis a guide developed specifically focusing on girls in the Congo.

WarChild has this very short primer that discusses some of the myths about childsoldiers, those related to ‘regaining childhood’ are relevant. They’ve also got a pretty goodlong form post about the impact of war on children generally.

Child soldiers are a topic I’m not quite as knowledgeable on as some ofthe other things I talk about. Given the volume of asks I get on the subjectI’m prioritising it as an area of research and I hope I can produce somerelevant Masterposts on the subject this year.

Generally though, I get the feeling you’re on the right track andapproaching the topic with thought and sensitivity.

I hope this helps. :)

Disclaimer

[aspieworldviews]

(expanding) Like the audio visual stuff and socialisation too

AHHH I think I understand now!

There are quite a few “departments” I guess you could say, where we are effected by autism. 

The most notable one being Socialization. People tend to think anyone who’s socially awkward has autism, but that’s not true. When it comes to socializing awkwardness is definitely a factor however, tuning out of the conversation, being uncomfortable in large spaces with large groups of people, comfortable when people are too loud. Almost all aspects of being social can be very uncomfortable for an Aspie.

Executive functioning issues are also a mostly overlooked part of Autism. Unfortunatly it shares a border with ADHD so sometimes executive functioning issues get overlooked. Executive functioning disorder is like… 

here is a little snippet from a website, which explains it much better than I would have :P 

The three main areas of executive function are:

Working memory

Cognitive flexibility (also called flexible thinking)

Inhibitory control (which includes self-control)

Executive function is responsible for a number of skills, including:

Paying attention

Organizing, planning and prioritizing

Starting tasks and staying focused on them to completion

Understanding different points of view

Regulating emotions

Self-monitoring (keeping track of what you’re doing)

So let’s say you’re trying to clean your room. You pick something up, after having forgotten about it. Then you start to play with it, or do whatever it is the item is intended for. Boom, your executive functioning just failed. Or, if while you’re cleaning up, you suddenly remember another thing you were going to do. you end up completely forgetting about whatever you were doing before you got distracted.

If I’m given multiple tasks I generally have to be reminded about the one’s i’ve forgotten or they will never get done. 

The Audio and visual go into a bigger category (for some reason I can’t remember the name right now) But it’s Feel, Audio, visual and smell. 

they’re each effected differently. With visual it’s usually bright light, florescent light, etc.. Even cloudy day can be bad if there’s a lot of light bouncing around from the ground or the clouds. 

For Auditory it’s Loud sounds, high pitched sounds, basically… a lot of sounds. I very much dislike the sound of the microwave going off. I always stop it at one so it doesn’t beep. sirens, fire works, the train, the light rail. I could go on and on.*Edit* something I forgot to mention is auditory dysfunction issues. Whith me, it'll be like... Someone's talking, I can hear them perfectly. But it sounds like they're speaking an alien language. And generally when I ask people to repeat themselves, if they don't know why they just speak louder... Which h isn't helpful. I heard you just fine. I just need to hear the actual sounds that we're coming uout of your mouth.  

For touch and feeling it’s very much a texture thing. This also goes along with food. If an article of clothing is too rough the reaction could be anything from an actual rash, to being annoyed at your shirt all day because it’s very uncomfortable. I know when I’m uncomfortable in my cloths, weather they’re too tight, too short, not the right materiel etc… It gives me anxiety. Like, If I don’t change right then and there I’ll have a melt down. 

Aspies also tend to be very sensitive to smell. there are obvious smells that nobody likes, but we tend to be extra effected. I hate the smell of food that’s cold, which is supposed to be warm. like, canned soup, cold leftovers. like literally it can make me gag. When I worked at Mcdonalds the leftover ketchup on trays was THE WORST thing ever. 

Most people, after a day of sun and socializing are fine with just going, relaxing and doing it all again tomorrow. However when it comes to ASD we tend to take more time to recover. A day at the theme park could mean two weeks of no socialization. It can also cause breakdowns, or meltdowns. especially if anything else happens. you forget something you need, you can’t handle the food you’re supposed to have. 

I’m sorry if this is either too much or not enough, there’s a lot of stuff when it Comes to Autism. If any of my other followers have input, please comment!! there’s so much I’m just not sure I could cover it in one post. 

I hope you can get something out of this. if you need anything else feel free to ask!!

-Lindsey