#do you ever think about the limitlessness of the dreamscape. and do you ever think about what scenery and memories they wouldve walked

[blae-kitta]

Dreamscape chats before everything went wrong

[battleangel]

Youre 40?!

Every time someone new meets me, they are shocked to hear that I am over 40.

I will be 42 next Saturday.

Society wants you to fear getting old so that you not only fear death but so you also believe the bullshit that when youre in your 40s, you have to "put yourself out to pasture".

As Madonna said, who is currently having the tour of her career at 65, "Why would I put myself out to pasture just because Im 40?" She was asked this 25 years ago and shes still going strong.

Im almost 42 so no more pigtails.

No more Pokemon.

No more wearing outfits I got at dELiA*s, DOTS & Wet Seal 25 years ago when I was 17.

No more Hello Kitty.

No more Sanrio.

No more bedazzled jean skirts.

No more y2k aesthetic.

No being a Y2K Bad Bhabie.

No more hyperness, excitability or quirkiness.

No more jfashion, leather garters, leather chokers, torn fishnets, combat boots & tiaras.

No getting half a dozen tattoos in a year at 40.

No quitting your coaching & consulting business, Fortune 500 recruiting & Ivy league career coaching careers at 40 to be a full-time freelance video game podcaster.

No butt dancing with your husband after the Sixers win or making silly TikToks to celebrate birthday sex.

Youre in your 40s now, act your age.

Whats acting my age?

Stop doing, well, all of the shit you just mentioned. Youre going to be 42, not 22.

Your 1 bedroom apartment looks like a college dorm with all the video game and movie posters.

Why are you still in a 1 bedroom apartment after almost a decade of marriage?

When will you get a house?

When will you get a job?

When will you start another business?

When will you grow up and stop acting like a teenager?

You're 42, why are you 90 pounds, even at 5"1, that is the weight you were at in high school. That is the weight for a teenager not an adult woman.

When will you ever act your age?

Age is nothing but a mindset.

Age is in your mind.

You dont have to fear old age and your body breaking down.

Ive had arthritis for over 20 years and stopped takikg arthritis medication over 3 years ago.

I have severe arthritis in my spine, back and neck and moderate arthritid throughout the joints in my body.

I experience soreness, back and lower spine spasming, tightness and stifness in my joints and my lower spine cracks a lot -- so what?

I use heat pads and CBD cream and just accept it.

If you take a similar approach to aging -- Im going to get older, I am here very temporarily physically manifested as a human being, Im going to die then return to the dreamscape aka the "afterlife" where I originated from as an eternal energetic limitless being.

Then getting older is no bfd and its nothing to fear.

Its just something that happens.

Society teaches us to avoid getting older and to dread it.

Women are taught to lie about it -- "A woman never gives her age" -- why the fuck not?

Women are told to fear getting old, wrinkly and ugly.

I wear crop tops almost every day, long sleeved, short sleeved, sweaters, whatever.

I wear bikinis, booty shorts, micro mini skirts, combat boots, converse wedged heels, pink wigs, blue wigs, green wigs, rainbow wigs, leather pants that show my underwear, rhinestone bralettes, literally whatever the fuck I want.

42 or not.

Whats "42"?

Whats "my 40s"?

Why should I be afraid of "getting old" when Ive had fucking arthritis for over 20 years?

Youre as young AND as old as you feel.

Whats so different about Madonna?

Why cant you keep it pushing at 40?

42?

Why cant you shake your dreads at any age?

Like so many of the "cants" and "shoulds" of this place, they SAY you cant, but you can.

They say you "should", but you dont have to.

By the way, who the fuck is "they"?

And why do you fucking care so much what "they" think?

Live your life booski.

At any and every age.

With no fear of "getting old" or of "death".

They make you fear to control you.

Stop letting them.

Dont put yourself out to pasture in your 40s or at any age!

Im not going to.

Ill be rocking my pigtails, micro mini skirts, booty shorts, pink blue & green wigs, leather garters & chokers, torn fishnets and combat boots into my 50s, 60s and 70s.

[soft-sarcasm]

JUNG HOSEOK: THIS CONVERSATION.

Pairing: jung hoseok x reader. Genre: a n g s t. that's it. Word count: 3,2k+ a/n: i keep going ages without posting and when i do post its never what i've promised but i swear the stuff i said before is going to arrive sometime in the next millenium. i don't know really where this came from or what it is but it followed out really naturally because for me i either sit down and write something to its completion, or start something, get like almost mid-way, stop and never come back it. so here it is, whatever it is. p.s i listened to these songs from the your name soundtrack while writing the end of this and almost bawled my eyes out so if you want to go full emo enjoy. also this conversations by ciaran levery is really good for this. @kaylee-jade-camp

The first 48 hours are crucial, in both a missing persons case and a 'might have been broken up with' case. Okay, perhaps the latter isn't quite as crucial as the former, but it certainly felt like you were missing something, perhaps your heart, as you stared blankly at the neatly digitalised words that had been haunting you for the past 20 hours since they had initially been received;

'This isn't working out.'

Now it may seem a bit dramatic to instantly jump to the conclusion that you were being broken up with, and you would agree if it hadn't been the conclusion to a near-hour long fight that had raged between message notifications and furiously tapping thumbs. Text messages and phone-calls had been the customary medium in which the majority of your relationship-centric arguments had taken place throughout the year that there had been a relationship to argue about. It had become so customary to expel all of your frustration and disagreement through sharply worded texts and the purposeful absence of any reassuring emojis that you sometimes wondered if there was any other way to communicate such feelings.

Thankfully such instances didn't occur too frequently but when they did it usually happened when one, or both, of you, were seriously sleep-deprived and stressed out. This meant that it was far easier for fingers to type on their own and for hurtful words to be sent off to the other without a coherent thought. Something similar had transpired during the early hours of this morning when a simple 'have a safe flight' message to Hoseok had turned into something so much more. How or even why you couldn't be sure but somehow a match had been struck and a flurry of unresolved issues had been ignited.

'I just want some space.'

'You're barely in the country. The only thing that's ever between us is space.'

'You don't understand how hard this is for me.'

'I would if you would just tell me.'

'That's what I'm doing now and you aren't listening.'

'Because all I'm hearing are excuses.'

Those were just a few of the highlighted exerts from your far too dragged out debate, the in-between lines being stuffed with sentiments of a similar miscommunication. And then the dreaded 'this isn't working out' had been sent that was quickly followed by a complete radio silence which you knew you could logically account to the 16-hour flight Hoseok had been in the process of boarding when your fight had broken out. Even then the illogical part of your brain had decided matter-of-factly that Hoseok was officially done with you, that if he wanted he could use some of the all but limitless money he earned to purchase some of the airlines overpriced wifi and contact you but was choosing not to.

You were over. Finished. Nothing else to say and yet you couldn't help but hold out some semblance of hope that when he finally touched down on to home soil that you would receive a relieving ding followed by some sort of explanation about how he was still willing to work things out.

And yet nothing. You knew sometimes there was a delay between the landing and being out of the airport but even then, cell-service was not limited to being clear of Incheon and again, if Hoseok wanted to, he could have contacted you. 

But it was clear that he didn't want to.

You had attempted to function with the knowledge that the relationship you had devoted so much energy and devotion to was just over. You went to your job, typed out mindless translations only to be later berated by your superior for the multiple discrepancies in your work. You had then proceeded to leave work and had a lonely meal for one in the tiny Udon place on the corner of your street, wallowing over you overcooked noodles as the radio blared the symphony of your boyfriend (potentially ex-boyfriend's) group as if to mock you.

You now found yourself curled into the crevice of your couch, staring down at the fluorescent screen of your phone with your message app opened to your conversation with 'Hobi.' Your responding message had yet to be read but you knew there was no way that Hoseok had spent this much time without looking at his phone, eve the tech-addict as was the majority of your generation.

'What does that mean for us?'

The silence was pretty clear answer to your question, there was no us left to mean anything.

Introspection was not something you excelled at. In fact ignoring and suppressing emotional issues was far more your style, as was it Hoseok's. Hoseok for all his sunshine and smiley cover, one he maintained even when he had landed which you knew thanks to fansite photos that had been posted as soon as he walked out of the Arrival gates over three hours ago, was a complex Rubix cube of a human. It took ages to figure him out and twist out all of his colours to get six sides that you could actually understand. Over the year you'd like to think you had gotten pretty close to having six completely solid faces but it seemed that you had been mistaken and there was still plenty of squares for you to decipher; not that you would be given the opportunity now.

It felt surreal like you were somehow caught in some dreamscape where you didn't know whether or not to trust your surroundings which was why you didn't instantly react to the serious of melodic dings that signalled your doorbell had been rung. The robotic sound echoed throughout your otherwise quiet apartment and when the final ding rang out there was a silence before the entire melody was set off again. 

"Coming," You muttered quietly, shuffling through your flat that you hadn't even realised had become all but entirely dark since you had reclined to wallowing in the final hours of sunlight and had yet to do anything since. So you proceeded to turn on the lights as you reluctantly pulled yourself up to the screen that would reveal who was summoning your presence.

Even with the pulled down bucket hat and mask tugged under his chin it was undeniably Hoseok and his appearance was so startling that it took you a moment to actually comprehend that he was real and not a figment of your imagination. Your heart ached after not seeing him for so long and your palms felt clammy as you pressed the green button labelled 'Unlock.'

It was difficult to breathe with the anticipation lodged in your throat as you watched the door be pushed open and Hoseok to follow in after it. He didn't look at you as he made quick work of slipping off his shoes and trading them for the pair of house slippers that over the course of his visits had become his. When there was no task left for him to distract himself with he finally turned to where you stood, legs near quaking as you waited for him to say something.

"Hi." Was all he uttered and you had to stifle a scoff.

Anger threatened the creep into your system, attempting to punch words out of your mouth like 'what the fuck is going on,' 'why did you never reply' or what you really wanted to say 'are we really over?'

But you swallowed such questions and opted instead for a strangled, "Hi." Followed by an equally strained half smile that made your facial muscles ache. He stood awkwardly in the entrance to your home and the sight reminded you so much of the first time he had been there, hands stuffed idly in his pockets to keep himself busy as he attempted to keep his balance due to the alcohol that had coursed in his system thanks to the numerous cocktails you had shared at dinner. The air had been much lighter then, so much so that when you realised he hadn't followed behind you, you had turned back, an instant fit of giggles summoned by the look of uncertainty on his rose hazed face.

"You know, you can come in," You had said through tinkles of laughter, smile so big and heart so warm with your increasing adoration for this man that it had almost hurt, "You can always come in, no matter what."

Maybe that was why the look of hesitation on his face now hurt so deeply, that things had changed so thoroughly in your relationship that that meaningless promise you had made all that time before in between laughter and happiness didn't even apply.

"You can come in," You repeated, somberness twisting the words that once possessed so much merriment. You didn't say anything else.

Hoseok merely nodded and took a tentative step forward, so much caution that you literally had to turn away and busy yourself by migrating towards the kitchen. Hoseok's dancing abilities kept his steps light as he trailed behind you but thanks to the silence you were still able to hear when his movements stopped just at the threshold. A further sense of unfamiliarity and alienation crept up your spine and you had to stabilise yourself against the counter before mindlessly reaching over to switch the kettle on.

"Tea?"

You heard a rustle which made you assume Hoseok nodded but he seemed to realise pretty quickly that you couldn't actually see the movement with your back to him, "Yes."

This had to be the fewest words that had ever been shared between the two of you. You were both natural chatterboxes and even during the moments of silence shared between you there was still the loud comfort of the other's presence. There was no comfort remaining now as you stood what felt like oceans apart on the opposite sides of your shoebox kitchen. It was almost ironic, how you had actually spent weeks near months apart separated by actual, physical oceans apart and yet you had somehow felt closer then you did now.

The distance only seemed to stretch alongside the quiet as you both waited for the water boil and the distraction of placing two leaf-filled filter bags into separate cups before drowning them in scalding liquid. After a moment of steeping, you finally turned to Hoseok, half-looking at him as you extended a mug in his direction. He reached to take it with a nearly silent thank you before you both moved towards the living room.

Living room seemed to be a bit of a grand title for the make-shift space that doubled as a place you watched tv and ate but it would have to do today as the setting for this 20-hour dreaded conversation.

"I don't know where to start," Hoseok started quietly after one too many moments of silence had ticked past, "It's so different being here, like this."

"You mean in person?" You attempted to joke but knew that your words landed more as a blow by the way Hoseok winced at this, "Yeah, I know what you mean."

His lithe fingers tapped up and down the ceramic cup in his hand while you simply fumbled with the handle of your own mug, "Where do you even begin?"

"I think with something similar to 'I don't think this is working out," Again your words seemed to injure Hoseok as he flinched, "That's where our last conversation dropped off isn't it?" He seemed unnerved to be confronted with the reality of the situation, of the reality of his previous actions or lack thereof. It was as if he had almost expected you to ignore it, as though it hadn't been how you had ended up here.

"Yeah about that-" He swallowed as if to rid himself of a lump in his throat, "- I wasn't really thinking clearly when I sent that- you know how it is sometimes with the late nights and the early morning, I didn't mean it-"

"-Are you sure Hoseok?" You cut in even though you knew that it wasn't most likely the most sensitive thing to do in this situation but you could barely stand this situation as it was and his rambling with just going to prolong the agony. It was better to cut to the chase, to snip the steel cords that had once kept you so solidly tied together but had now been tugged down into weak, meagre whisps of wires that were now so easily snapped. "Are you sure you didn't mean it?"

"Of course I didn't," He answered instantly, eyes meeting yours for what felt like the first time, "Sure, sometimes this is a bit difficult but I never wanted to end things."

"Are you sure?" You repeated like some sort of broken record and for a moment you questioned yourself, why were you actively talking Hoseok out of making up? Why were you so set on causing the thing mere minutes ago you had been so fearful of.

Maybe it was because there was a part of you, the more logical part of you that was usually pushed to the background in emotional situations that understood Hoseok's true feelings, that knew that he had meant what he said even if he had yet to fully realise that himself.

"What are you even saying right now?" 

"I think," Your hands all but rattled against the handle of your mug as the shook, "I think that you did- do want to end things."

You could hear the bewilderment in his voice even though you couldn't look at him to confirm your suspicion, "What- I don't understand-"

"I think," You continued, a familiar pricking sensation occurring in your eyes, "I think it's best if we do end things here."

Hoseok choked, "Where is this even coming from?"

Where was this coming from? Hadn't you been denying the reality of this situation mere seconds, breaths before Hoseok had officially arrived? Hadn't you spent the last 20 hours clinging to some semblance that this wasn't where your relationship ended? That after months, years even of putting up with the distance, the stress, the strain that this was it.

But the thing was, before Hoseok arrived it had been easier to pretend that there was still a carved space for each other in your lives. The actual shock of Hoseok being at your place reminded you just how long it had been since you had actually physically spent more than a few hours together. There had been the time nearly two weeks back where you had met at the company building, prepared to eat lunch together when suddenly your time together was cut to a short twenty minutes when Hoseok was suddenly called away for some urgent work thing. It hadn't been an unusual occurrence, more often than not your dates, nights together were cut short. You couldn't even remember the last time you had had sex, maybe two months ago, between the American and European tours in which you had paid him a surprise visit in London which had again been abruptly interrupted when there had been an emergency back at work that couldn't be taken care of over Skype. 

When you actually started to think about your relationship there was very little of it to even recall, or at least to recall from the past few months. Except for the everyday mandatory text, all connections and efforts had dwindled. Which was to be expected and had happened before in the past but usually one of you would catch onto the separation sooner and would reach out, pointing out the distance and an effort would then be made to work harder, to talk more. But nothing had been brought up for months. Instead your relationship had turned near monotonous, a dull repeat of 'how was your day,' 'good morning,' and 'goodnight' with no real substance or interest in between. You used to know the latest tour story or funny antic by one of the boys but as you sat there in the heavy silence you couldn't remember the last time Hoseok had shared anything but the barest, most mundane details of his day. 

"We barely talk anymore Hoseok, which was made pretty clear by this morning, and even when we do it's not really about anything." 

"That doesn't mean we have to break up," Hoseok argued, adamance clear in his tone as he took to his feet, leaving his tea abandoned on the coffee table, "We just -I just need to work harder, I know sometimes with my job it feels like I'm a million miles away but I swear I can work on it-"

"-Hoseok," You interrupted softly turning to face him now, your heart shaking at the look of utter frustration and sadness on his face as his eyes burned with unshed tears, "This isn't just your fault, it's both of yours. Sometimes it just isn't the right time- maybe right now it isn't the best time for us-"

"-There won't be any us if we end right now." He stated, "That's how this works, if we decide that right now isn't the right time there won't ever be a right time and then we'll move on, you'll move on, and then there won't be any time for us because we'll be nothing but strangers."

A watery smile tugged at your lips, "Everyone's a stranger before they come into your life, and some people are just meant to continue being strangers."

"But not us," His voice was becoming more and more desperate as he tried to reason with both you and himself, "We were never meant to be strangers, I'm your pers- you're my person."

Slowly Hoseok sunk to his knees on the floor, the tears finally pouring out as his body and resolve caved in and you slipped off the couch to join him. You placed your hand gently on his knee as he wiped furiously at his eyes, "And there's going to be another person after me Hoseok, and if they aren't right there'll be someone else until you find the right one at the right time and it'll just all make sense."

"How can you say that? How can you be so calm?" He sobbed as if not taking notice to the shatter in your voice and the tears that trailed down your cheeks in steady dripping streams. 

"Because I know it's true," You spoke so softly you barely heard yourself, "And so do you, you know that there's someone else that's going to make you so fucking happy and you're going to think back to this moment and know."

"No, no, no," Hoseok began to chant in between sobs before flinging his arms around you so you could physically feel his tears, "There won't ever be anyone else, that's not how it works."

You clutched him back just as tightly, staring at the ceiling as you blinked back tears to ground yourself, "Yes it is Hobi, and I can't fucking wait until you meet someone who gives you the happiness you deserve."

He pulled back to look at you and you couldn't help but reach to brush some of the remaining tears from his face, "This isn't how it's supposed to end, over something so stupid."

"Sometimes we don't even realise that what we're feeling is just love rather than being in love." 

"Why are you so fucking smart? What am I going to do without you stopping me from doing stupid stuff?"

It was a genuine tug of happiness that curved your lips upwards as you wiped a final tear from his check, "Find someone smarter."

[barbosaasouza]

DreamHack Dallas Announces 2019 Indie Lineup

The swell gang at DreamHack have chosen an array of thoughtful, striking, ridiculous, spooky, and action-packed titles for their Indie Playground at DreamHack Dallas 2019! So, come take a peek at them.

Best Action

Black Salt Coreuption – “Black Salt Coreuption is a one-on-one 3D arena fighting game that allows complete freedom of movement around the arena rather than 3D fighters doing combat on a 2D plane.”

Prodeus – “Prodeus is the first person shooter of old, re-imagined using modern rendering techniques. It reaches the quality you expect from a AAA experience while adhering to some of the aesthetic technical limits of older hardware.”

Them’s Fightin’ Herds – “Them’s Fightin’ Herds is an indie 2D fighting game featuring a cast of adorable animals designed by acclaimed cartoon producer Lauren Faust. Beneath the cute and cuddly surface, a mechanically-deep GGPO-powered fighter awaits!”

Trap Labs – “Follow Billy’s ascent on Trap Lab’s building in pursuit of pocket money in this online action puzzle. Dodge trap doors, spikes, vortices, cats on Roombas, salary-chickens, and other weird things to survive! It’s a game inspired by the strange combination of RTS games and cartoons from early 2000s.”

  Best Action Adventure

Dreamscaper – “A fluid, action-packed, RPG Rogue-lite – every slumber is a different dungeon and you must unlock the powers of your dreams to fend off nightmares and see a new day.”

Freedom Planet 2 – “The fast paced platforming of Freedom Planet returns! Become a full-time cartoon heroine and use abilities and items suited to your play style to explore the world of Avalice and defend its animal citizens!”

Outpost Delta – “Outpost Delta, the latest game from Hidden Achievement, is a single player, 2-D side-scrolling sci-fi shooter for PC. Take on the role of Delta, the outpost’s emergency defense, along with her AI companion, Joule, as you defend the outpost against alien intruders called the “Klaath.””

The Ambassador: Fractured Timelines – “The Ambassador: Fractured Timelines is an action packed twin-stick shooter built around your ability to stop time.”

Best Adventure

Depths of Sanity – “Something is brewing at the bottom of the ocean and it is up to you to investigate. Dive into this underwater metroidvania, coming Q1 2020.”

  Best AR/VR Experience

XING: The Land Beyond – “You died. Welcome to XING: The Land Beyond, an atmospheric first-person puzzle adventure for desktops and virtual reality. Enjoy your peaceful escape from the chaotic world of the living, and travel the lands of the dead.”

  Best Arthouse

Blink – “You are trapped within the perception of a mysterious Eye; everything it sees is a reality for you. But a curious thing happens when its eye closes, the world disappears around you and anything brightly lit up leaves an afterimage burned into the vision of the Eye. To you, these afterimages are solid objects, and you can jump on them to get to unreachable places and accomplish impossible feats.”

Heartbound – “Heartbound is a non-traditional role-playing game about a boy, his dog, secrets, and sanity.”

Project Arrhythmia – “A rhythmic adventure in which all things beautiful are deadly. Avoid the musically timed pulse of blocks and bars, and in the process you might just find out what this mysterious “Project Arrhythmia” is.

  Best Casual

Alluris – “Alluris is what would happen if you asked: “What if someone mixed Oregon Trail, D&D, Hearthstone, and Tinder.” The answer is an adventure game with nearly limitless opportunities yet only two inputs: swipe left or swipe right. Swipe your way through an adventure that is uniquely your own!”

Merchant – “Merchant reimagines the classic RPG experience from the perspective of a Merchant. Hire Heroes and Crafters to do your bidding for you.”

Ooga Booga: The Prehistoric Survival Game – “Follow a tribe of the ancient world’s laziest hunter gatherers. See how long you can survive without leaving your cave. Hunt, cook, and eat various pre-historic wildlife and invent new ways to stay alive as long as possible in this weird and wonderful survival game.”

Roundguard – “Roundguard is a bouncy dungeon crawler with pinball physics, lots of loot, and a randomized castle full of oddballs. Press your luck against hordes of dangerously cute monsters and challenging roguelike elements in this all-round bouncy adventure!”

Best Early Access

Super Animal Royale – “Select your favorite adorably murderous fox, panda, or sloth and parachute into a FURocious 64-player battle arena.”

  Best Horror

The Eternal Castle [REMASTERED] – “The Eternal Castle [REMASTERED] is an ambitious attempt to modernize an old classic in order to keep its memory alive. Through detailed research and hard work, the production team tried to expand the experience while keeping the same ‘feel’ and emotional flow of the original masterpiece from 1987.”

Krumpet Town – “Krumpet Town is a slice of life meets horror game. Customize your character, explore exciting new environments, help your neighbors, and investigate the strange occurrences that are taking place on your home island!”

  Best Humor

Shadow Fencer Theatre – “Shadow Fencer Theatre is the competitive awkward physics sword fighting game set in the world of shadow puppets. Take center stage with a unique cast of characters and make your way to become a Grandmaster of the theatre.”

Wave Break – “Grab and grind to your heart’s content in Wave Break! Inspired by classic arcade skateboarding games, with a splash of boating, explosions, and cold-blooded murder.”

  Best Multiplayer

Balls Out – “Balls Out is a 4 player Cooperative Third Person Action Game Show Shooter. Think Rocket League meets Smash TV. Play solo or with 3 co-op friends, fighting to survive waves of Aliens in an episode of a space survival inspired Running Man type show.”

Mini Wheels – “Mini Wheels is a story-driven karting game. Play one of the five available game modes: Story Campaign, Single Racing, Capture the Flag, Burnout and Boss Battle. Help Pipo – the lost and lonely toy – find the way back to his favorite human through an action-packed series of races.”

Project Winter – “The perfect game to back-stab your friends. Project Winter is an 8 person multiplayer game focusing on social deception and survival. Communication and teamwork is essential to the survivors’ ultimate goal of escape. Gather resources, repair structures, and brave the wilderness together.”

PROTOCORE – “The bad news : you’re lost in a massive spaceship, your memory’s gone and there’s an army of robots that wants you dead. The good news? You have guns. Lots of guns. So lock and load and get your memories back, one bullet at a time.”

Best RPG

Bound By Blades – “In the Action RPG, Bound By Blades, the desolate land of Ashmyr has become overwhelmed by bloodthirsty beasts. Scavenge materials, forge gear, and fortify yourself to confront the ferocious foes that lie ahead in order to rekindle the last hopes of life.”

Last Epoch – “Last Epoch combines time travel, exciting dungeon crawling, engrossing character customization and endless replayability to create an Action RPG for veterans and newcomers alike.”

Popup Dungeon – “A papercraft roguelike RPG that lets you create any weapon, ability, enemy, and hero imaginable.”

Rogue Empire: Dungeon Crawler RPG – “Rogue Empire is a tactical turn-based RPG with randomly generated content and heavy Rogue-like elements. Choose one of multiple character combinations and advance it with unique abilities! Embark on a quest to heal the 5 kingdoms and understand the mysteries of the First Shadow!”

  Best Strat/Sim

Fell Seal: Arbiter’s Mark – “Fell Seal: Arbiter’s Mark is a turn-based tactical RPG with a focus on storytelling and strategic battles. Unfold a mature story as you progress through hand-crafted scenarios, controlling your own group of Arbiters, with each character customizable from a wide selection of classes and abilities!”

Summoners Fate – “Summoners Fate is a top-down deck builder adventure game with turn-based combat. Determine the destiny of hundreds of diverse characters by choosing cards as you explore an ever-changing single player experience. Battle other players on desktop and mobile in async and real-time cross-platform multiplayer.”

Wildermyth – “Wildermyth is a character-driven, procedurally-generated tactical RPG. Lead a band of unique heroes as they grow from reluctant farmers into legendary fighters. Battle the threats lurking in the Yondering Lands and discover secrets that the land has to offer.”

    Dive headfirst into the exhibiting experience by joining the Indie Playground at DreamHack Dallas this June. Selected games will receive a free booth in the Expo at a festival that encompasses everything gamer life from esports, to indie games, to midnight horror films.

The post DreamHack Dallas Announces 2019 Indie Lineup appeared first on Indie Games Plus.

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[darkartandcraft]

XABRACADABRA The Magical Art of Stephen Kasner Part I/III

Tonight, Dark Art & Craft will be featuring the first of a three-part interview with the dark visual artist, musician and, photographer Stephen Kasner. This in-depth interview with Thomas Haywood and Dott von Schneider takes a look into the inspiration and foundations of Kasner's dark creative work.

Read interview part I/III below:

by Thomas Haywood and Dott von Schneider

What is your definition of creativity?

Anything that attempts to be or become something greater than the sum of its parts. Creativity is an elevated result from the use of tools, visible or invisible. 

What would you say was your initial inspiration to start creating art? When did you discover you had this natural ability?

Just like most children, I always draw pictures. Drawing; concentrating on drawings, are among my earliest memories. I do recall my first vivid emotional connection to art which occurred at age 3. This was a completely random thing that evoked real emotion, actual fear, within me. This whole concept escaped me completely. I couldn’t possibly begin to wrap my mind around the reasons why I felt this fear, or how or why I could or would create something, seemingly unconsciously and from within myself that would produce these feelings. What use could I have for that at such a young age. It does prove, however, that fear, terror, uncertainty, are all feelings we naturally possess as human beings. They did come from somewhere. No one taught me that. Surely dark and terrifying emotions are instilled in all of us right from the moment of birth, perhaps even conception, but that’s an entirely different and more abstract concept.

Early on I would spend hours on end drawing in total solitude. Luckily for me, my parents didn’t think this strange and force me outside with other kids. That pursuit led me on all sorts of independent paths. Whenever I had an inspirational opportunity, I would draw from the television. I would watch old westerns and classic horror films and draw to them. More precisely, the movies would be on as a sort of soundtrack, and I would draw my own images to whatever scenarios I would hear occurring in the films. Later in life this was either an extension of, or perhaps simply a continuation of a natural method, when I began to really focus energy on translating musical artists works to imagery.

You’ve always been rather tied into the music scene, beginning locally. What is your personal history there?

Among my childhood friends, I was always surprised to discover that I felt I was the most serious admirer of music, just from sheer appreciation, enthusiasm and emotional connection. I recall asking one of my friends in the 5th or 6th grade what his favorite music and musicians were, and he was completely perplexed. Confounded, even. He looked rather puzzled and asked, “You mean, like, radio?” I didn’t know how to respond to that, but having cited a few examples, the next bedazzling reply came, “I guess I like The Police. On the radio”. I had a lot of strange run-ins like that. But see, I thought everyone was like me. I just assumed it at the time. It was all I could do to join the orchestra to not go out of my mind. I did have the good fortune of having befriended an amazing drummer then who turned me onto foundation bands like The Beatles, Black Sabbath, Iron Maiden, very early on. This was a blessing because I personally had a limited access to records then, and he would let me borrow his. I would take the records home, and they would be like treasures to me. I would play them incessantly and draw from the album covers. It was heaven. Jeff is the first person I ever experienced a live, loud (drumming) session with, and he still plays, by the way. But this happening in front of me at that young age, in the same room where I can actually feel the pressure of the experience was mind-blowing.

So these experiences opened my mind to possibilities earlier on, and I began seeking the more extreme options, music and art, whatever I could access and digging into deeper sources. Within just a couple years, I was regularly locked in my room endlessly testing my mother’s seemingly limitless patience with Charged G.B.H., Dead Kennedys, Exploited, The Accused, Black Flag, MDC, Alien Sex Fiend, at maximum volumes at all hours. This absorption of punk music as well as the timing, then being 16 years old and now able to drive to any show I wanted to see, led me to a world where I was now in the same room with many of these amazing people, seeing them perform, changing lives on the spot. Small shows within my own neighborhood were bands like Domestic Crisis, Grimace, Starvation Army, Death of Samantha, and Spike In Vein, who were all massive influences on me. Once all these emotional floodgates were opened fully and for good, that was it for me. No turning back.  

Your initial success in the industry came from working with bands and musicians.  How did this come to be? Did you approach bands to work with them, or did they stumble upon you?  

A bit of both occurred. Naturally, early on I pursued musicians and bands I had access to locally. I was still in high school when I produced my first work for any band, which was  probably The Spudmonsters, a still-legendary band connected to the punk/post-punk/metal scene of the ‘80s-90s. Leading up to my initiation with Spudmonsters, I was seriously drawing and painting by then, though I didn’t have anything resembling a formed vision. Only fragments. So my first work with musicians came almost strictly under the heading of illustration, although most of the actual ideas were my own. Their ‘Kill Your Idols’ record is a good example of this. I continued to dabble and connect with bands that needed assistance with imagery, producing everything from cassette covers, t-shirt graphics, hand painted backdrops. I was recently reminded that I did a backdrop for Spudmonsters. I’ll have to trust that lead. It’s probably right.

Chris Andrews was a founding member and guitarist for the band, and he owned the locally famous ‘Chris’ Warped Records’ store at the time. All the while I did any work for his band, money was usually never exchanged. I did album and t-shirt artworks in trade for records. I feel like I still do this type of literal trade-work a lot these days. Far too much, probably. 

Things connected with music collaboration took a major turn during my college graduation exhibition when I was approached by Rockie Brockway of CRAW. In that show I exhibited Dreamscape I & II simultaneously for the first time as these two works had only just been completed days before. Rockie was adamant about the fact that these were the pieces for the first CRAW album which was soon to be released. Being a major fan of the band and having seen them perform dozens of times by then, I knew them well, and agreed with the concepts. Of course I was more than pleased to contribute. Proud, really, and still am today. Those Dreamscape pieces were a major life shift for me and my work, and so was my connection with CRAW. That album was released in 1993. The next major Cleveland collaboration connection came a few years later when I met Dwid of Integrity. My work with Dwid became long-term and extensive, and grew to include actually recording and performing live together with Psywarfare. Most recently we collaborated again, also with Jacob Bannon of Converge, as Irons. So full circle, the collaboration system doesn’t break down or separate at just the imagery. I record and perform music with friends as well, and have for years.

In reference to your earlier statement, I would like to explore the concept of “translating musical artists work to imagery”. Can you expand on those experiences and how they transpire?

These two elements have always been conjoined. I was always interested in drawing and painting, and became instantly wide-eyed realizing serious artist’s work in the world as a youth. Omni and Heavy Metal magazines in the late 70’s and into the 80’s, for example, initiated me into the world of Fantastic and Visionary artists such as Ernst Fuchs, Beksinski, H.R. Giger, Robert Venosa, and many others, and I would absorb these images while listening to records. This was my hobby, really, outside of actually drawing myself. I was equally, deeply connected to music of that era; Psychedelic and hard rock, 70’s metal, and I began to study guitar from age 8 with instructors as a by-product of this insatiable passion. Ironically, I wasn’t learning what I wanted to play, you know, Led Zeppelin riffs, but was being taught classical and Spanish music. I thought this was a drag at such an early age, and my mind couldn’t connect to the magical road I was being led on then. I couldn’t realize I was being given the keys to the gate. But I continued studying formally for 7 years or so, at which point the drawing and painting medium eclipsed everything completely. I still have the musical passion today to create and produce my own sounds, but now it’s very stream of consciousness, improvisational, transient. There’s little structure, but for reasons.

I always knew innately that art and music were one entity, and so this marriage of sound and image was always a deeply connected essence within, so I subconsciously fused the two, always. Once I realized, perhaps closer to my teen years, that real artists in the world did precisely this type of work, on some of my favorite record album covers for example, that was it for me. This was the silver lining; that I could find some way to connect these mediums seriously, as a lifelong pursuit, and I’ve never flinched from these methods and modes of thinking. It’s a spiritual existence, if you are one who can take it that way. It is religious for many people I know.

You work is so ethereal and so unique, it is hard to find a parallel with any other artist outside of the late, great H.R. Giger. Do you find a parallel or influence with and from his work?

I would think it difficult not to. I recognize his immense popularity now, but this wasn’t always the case, and to me, that’s part of what makes his work so much more magical. What I mean is, growing up in the 70s, being a child and inadvertently stumbling onto paintings by Giger through OMNI or on album covers like ELP’s Brain Salad Surgery, for example, this work burns into your brain, particularly if you’re a type of person predisposed to his kind of majestic, psychedelic expressionism. If you have even half a spirit, Giger’s work remains with you for a lifetime, and I spent my early years searching it out. It became utterly, thoroughly surreal later meeting and spending time with him in his home and studio in Switzerland. Oddly, even as a young teen, he was one of only two living people who I ever dreamed of meeting. Never obviously expecting either of these events to become a reality, I’m proud to say I’ve met and bonded with both my deepest heroes. These were major, life-altering events, naturally, which have affected the way I see and think, thank goodness.

There is a strong representation of heavy writers, artists, and musicians narrating your book, Stephen Kasner, WORKS: 1993-2006. How did you connect with these folks? How did the book first come about?

I’ve been extremely fortunate to have met so many amazing, magical artists and people worldwide. In traveling and exhibiting my work in other environments, it becomes rather natural to gravitate to other artists you admire and gain access to, and for them to gravitate to you. These are all people who share a similar energy, focus, and outlook on things, so the will to work together is also natural. I think the sheer curiosity of what may come of joining with another person or people is utterly compelling. It’s like love. We all want to give and receive as much love as we possibly can in all its available forms. At least we all should want that.

What’s the best thing about Halloween?

Dreaming the dream that somewhere in the world exists a most intrepid and ever-potent witch. But then every day is Halloween, isn’t it?

(End)

Please follow Dark Art & Craft for part two: XABRACADABRA The Magical Art of Stephen Kasner Part II/III

View some of Stephen Kasner limited edition print work on Dark Art & Craft, available this Halloween night Tuesday, October 31, 2017.

[barbosaasouza]

DreamHack Dallas Announces 2019 Indie Lineup

The swell gang at DreamHack have chosen an array of thoughtful, striking, ridiculous, spooky, and action-packed titles for their Indie Playground at DreamHack Dallas 2019! So, come take a peek at them.

Best Action

Black Salt Coreuption – “Black Salt Coreuption is a one-on-one 3D arena fighting game that allows complete freedom of movement around the arena rather than 3D fighters doing combat on a 2D plane.”

Prodeus – “Prodeus is the first person shooter of old, re-imagined using modern rendering techniques. It reaches the quality you expect from a AAA experience while adhering to some of the aesthetic technical limits of older hardware.”

Them’s Fightin’ Herds – “Them’s Fightin’ Herds is an indie 2D fighting game featuring a cast of adorable animals designed by acclaimed cartoon producer Lauren Faust. Beneath the cute and cuddly surface, a mechanically-deep GGPO-powered fighter awaits!”

Trap Labs – “Follow Billy’s ascent on Trap Lab’s building in pursuit of pocket money in this online action puzzle. Dodge trap doors, spikes, vortices, cats on Roombas, salary-chickens, and other weird things to survive! It’s a game inspired by the strange combination of RTS games and cartoons from early 2000s.”

  Best Action Adventure

Dreamscaper – “A fluid, action-packed, RPG Rogue-lite – every slumber is a different dungeon and you must unlock the powers of your dreams to fend off nightmares and see a new day.”

Freedom Planet 2 – “The fast paced platforming of Freedom Planet returns! Become a full-time cartoon heroine and use abilities and items suited to your play style to explore the world of Avalice and defend its animal citizens!”

Outpost Delta – “Outpost Delta, the latest game from Hidden Achievement, is a single player, 2-D side-scrolling sci-fi shooter for PC. Take on the role of Delta, the outpost’s emergency defense, along with her AI companion, Joule, as you defend the outpost against alien intruders called the “Klaath.””

The Ambassador: Fractured Timelines – “The Ambassador: Fractured Timelines is an action packed twin-stick shooter built around your ability to stop time.”

Best Adventure

Depths of Sanity – “Something is brewing at the bottom of the ocean and it is up to you to investigate. Dive into this underwater metroidvania, coming Q1 2020.”

  Best AR/VR Experience

XING: The Land Beyond – “You died. Welcome to XING: The Land Beyond, an atmospheric first-person puzzle adventure for desktops and virtual reality. Enjoy your peaceful escape from the chaotic world of the living, and travel the lands of the dead.”

  Best Arthouse

Blink – “You are trapped within the perception of a mysterious Eye; everything it sees is a reality for you. But a curious thing happens when its eye closes, the world disappears around you and anything brightly lit up leaves an afterimage burned into the vision of the Eye. To you, these afterimages are solid objects, and you can jump on them to get to unreachable places and accomplish impossible feats.”

Heartbound – “Heartbound is a non-traditional role-playing game about a boy, his dog, secrets, and sanity.”

Project Arrhythmia – “A rhythmic adventure in which all things beautiful are deadly. Avoid the musically timed pulse of blocks and bars, and in the process you might just find out what this mysterious “Project Arrhythmia” is.

  Best Casual

Alluris – “Alluris is what would happen if you asked: “What if someone mixed Oregon Trail, D&D, Hearthstone, and Tinder.” The answer is an adventure game with nearly limitless opportunities yet only two inputs: swipe left or swipe right. Swipe your way through an adventure that is uniquely your own!”

Merchant – “Merchant reimagines the classic RPG experience from the perspective of a Merchant. Hire Heroes and Crafters to do your bidding for you.”

Ooga Booga: The Prehistoric Survival Game – “Follow a tribe of the ancient world’s laziest hunter gatherers. See how long you can survive without leaving your cave. Hunt, cook, and eat various pre-historic wildlife and invent new ways to stay alive as long as possible in this weird and wonderful survival game.”

Roundguard – “Roundguard is a bouncy dungeon crawler with pinball physics, lots of loot, and a randomized castle full of oddballs. Press your luck against hordes of dangerously cute monsters and challenging roguelike elements in this all-round bouncy adventure!”

Best Early Access

Super Animal Royale – “Select your favorite adorably murderous fox, panda, or sloth and parachute into a FURocious 64-player battle arena.”

  Best Horror

The Eternal Castle [REMASTERED] – “The Eternal Castle [REMASTERED] is an ambitious attempt to modernize an old classic in order to keep its memory alive. Through detailed research and hard work, the production team tried to expand the experience while keeping the same ‘feel’ and emotional flow of the original masterpiece from 1987.”

Krumpet Town – “Krumpet Town is a slice of life meets horror game. Customize your character, explore exciting new environments, help your neighbors, and investigate the strange occurrences that are taking place on your home island!”

  Best Humor

Shadow Fencer Theatre – “Shadow Fencer Theatre is the competitive awkward physics sword fighting game set in the world of shadow puppets. Take center stage with a unique cast of characters and make your way to become a Grandmaster of the theatre.”

Wave Break – “Grab and grind to your heart’s content in Wave Break! Inspired by classic arcade skateboarding games, with a splash of boating, explosions, and cold-blooded murder.”

  Best Multiplayer

Balls Out – “Balls Out is a 4 player Cooperative Third Person Action Game Show Shooter. Think Rocket League meets Smash TV. Play solo or with 3 co-op friends, fighting to survive waves of Aliens in an episode of a space survival inspired Running Man type show.”

Mini Wheels – “Mini Wheels is a story-driven karting game. Play one of the five available game modes: Story Campaign, Single Racing, Capture the Flag, Burnout and Boss Battle. Help Pipo – the lost and lonely toy – find the way back to his favorite human through an action-packed series of races.”

Project Winter – “The perfect game to back-stab your friends. Project Winter is an 8 person multiplayer game focusing on social deception and survival. Communication and teamwork is essential to the survivors’ ultimate goal of escape. Gather resources, repair structures, and brave the wilderness together.”

PROTOCORE – “The bad news : you’re lost in a massive spaceship, your memory’s gone and there’s an army of robots that wants you dead. The good news? You have guns. Lots of guns. So lock and load and get your memories back, one bullet at a time.”

Best RPG

Bound By Blades – “In the Action RPG, Bound By Blades, the desolate land of Ashmyr has become overwhelmed by bloodthirsty beasts. Scavenge materials, forge gear, and fortify yourself to confront the ferocious foes that lie ahead in order to rekindle the last hopes of life.”

Last Epoch – “Last Epoch combines time travel, exciting dungeon crawling, engrossing character customization and endless replayability to create an Action RPG for veterans and newcomers alike.”

Popup Dungeon – “A papercraft roguelike RPG that lets you create any weapon, ability, enemy, and hero imaginable.”

Rogue Empire: Dungeon Crawler RPG – “Rogue Empire is a tactical turn-based RPG with randomly generated content and heavy Rogue-like elements. Choose one of multiple character combinations and advance it with unique abilities! Embark on a quest to heal the 5 kingdoms and understand the mysteries of the First Shadow!”

  Best Strat/Sim

Fell Seal: Arbiter’s Mark – “Fell Seal: Arbiter’s Mark is a turn-based tactical RPG with a focus on storytelling and strategic battles. Unfold a mature story as you progress through hand-crafted scenarios, controlling your own group of Arbiters, with each character customizable from a wide selection of classes and abilities!”

Summoners Fate – “Summoners Fate is a top-down deck builder adventure game with turn-based combat. Determine the destiny of hundreds of diverse characters by choosing cards as you explore an ever-changing single player experience. Battle other players on desktop and mobile in async and real-time cross-platform multiplayer.”

Wildermyth – “Wildermyth is a character-driven, procedurally-generated tactical RPG. Lead a band of unique heroes as they grow from reluctant farmers into legendary fighters. Battle the threats lurking in the Yondering Lands and discover secrets that the land has to offer.”

    Dive headfirst into the exhibiting experience by joining the Indie Playground at DreamHack Dallas this June. Selected games will receive a free booth in the Expo at a festival that encompasses everything gamer life from esports, to indie games, to midnight horror films.

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