#do not fuck around with rabies goddamn

[weird-dirt-creature]

There's a young raccoon stumbling around the neighborhood making rrrrrr noises and flopping over and rolling like it can't control its rear legs. It's been out all day, but because it's 4th of July, when I called animal controls after-hours line, they just told me they don't do anything on holidays so we can only call them if it's still around by 8:30 tomorrow morning.

So if it's rabid, fuck us I guess? Cute lil guy though.

[kennahjune]

HEAR ME OUT?? Please—

I LOVE love LOve when like, in fics, Steve has this really weird talent or interest that nobody knows about or like nobody expects but then oddly enough it sort of fits him.

And just like— it opens up so much possibility for character projection.

My favorite is writer Steve but I’ve been growing increasingly obsessed with Steve who’s hyper fixation is snakes.

The image in my head is like— everyone’s hanging out at the trailer park for one reason or another, and they hear Robin fucking /screech/.

Everyone’s on their feet in a split second, worry and confusion and deep dread forcing the way into the forefront of their minds.

Turns out: it was a snake. A really small one at that.

Eddie and Wayne offer to take it and dispose of it, the two of them having done this various other times with the other snakes people find in the trailer park.

But Steve pushes to the front of the group yelling and scolding.

“No absolutely not!”

Eddie shares a look with Nancy, both chalking it up to Steve’s hero complex acting up and him trying to protect them from the potentially dangerous critter.

“Look, Stevie—“

“You are not going to kill that little sweetheart!”

Eddie paused, shared a confused furrow of brows with Nancy and Robin, and turned to face Steve fully.

“Stevie, baby, that’s a snake.”

Steve stood with his hands on his hips, a determined glint in his eye, and nodded. “No I thought it was a squirrel.”

Eddie sighed loudly. “Then what do we do with it?”

“Well not fucking kill it for starters! It’s harmless. Aren’t you baby?”

Eddie and everyone else watched Steve step up to the snake that was hanging from the trailer’s side door. “Um, Steve what’re you doing?”

Steve ignored them completely and simply plucked the snake from its place on the door. From somewhere beside Eddie Robin squeaked in horror and Will groaned while Lucas gave a violent shudder.

“Such a small baby aren’t ya?” Steve cooed at the little snake wrapped around his hand.

“Steve— that’s a snake,” Nancy said warily, eyeing said snake like it killed her mother. “A potentially dangerous snake.”

Steve scoffed while the snake lifted the front of its body to peer at him. “She’s not dangerous, she’s a goddamn rat snake. They’re harmless.”

Just as he said it, the snake turned its head and not his finger. Where Steve didn’t even blink, everyone else freaked.

Eddie and Robin rushed over to him, Eddie immediately taking a look at his hand but keeping his hands away from the snake. Robin kept her distance but rambled about rabies or whatever.

Steve huffed and laughed quietly. “Guys, seriously. It’s a rat snake, they’re completely and utterly harmless to humans. They have such a small amount of venom it doesn’t bother humans. And besides, this little baby’s so small she couldn’t even break the skin.”

He was right, there was no sign of breakage or even redness on Steve’s hand where he was bitten.

Eddie looked at his boyfriend a little in awe and even more in love.

Jesus Christ.

Dustin and Mike walked slowly over to Steve, each asking to hold the snake.

Steve held it out gently, Dustin taking it first and holding it delicately in his hands. When he passed it over to Mike, the snake wrapped itself around his hands and a bit up his arms. Eddie was a little in shock at the giggle the younger Wheeler let out.

Dustin, Mike and Steve sat on the trailer’s side steps and held the snake together, going back and forth about random animal topics that Eddie couldn’t be bothered to remember.

When he asked later, Will and Lucas were delighted to explain that the entire reason Dustin was allowed to join The Party was because in 4th grade he brought Mike a frog he found. Lucas explained that Mike and Dustin had both gone through and extensive reptile and amphibian phase in elementary school and still held onto some of that obsession.

From then on, whenever anyone in the trailer park found any form of snake or rodent that they wanted gone, they called Steve.

[fastcardotmp3]

rockstar!robin, manager!steve, music journalist!eddie AU for funsies

On my first day shadowing her for this article, Robin Buckley tells me that her greatest fear in the world is not the massive crowds that flood arenas at every stop on her ongoing international tour, not the looming anxiety that her blooming success may be fleeting, not even a joke about how she worries this piece will make her look. No. On the day I meet Robin Buckley, she tells me the scariest thing on the planet is rabies. "By the time the symptoms set in, you're already dead," she says, walking with long strides towards her dressing room in the endless backstage of the Indianapolis Fieldhouse. "And I don't know about you, but death by raccoon is not how I want to go out."

I ask her if that's because it's not rock-and-roll enough, if such a mundane last stand doesn't match up with where she sees her life going these days, but the first thing out of her mouth in response is laughter.

She tells me maybe with a toss of her hands, asks me if I'm a music journalist or a shrink, and gets immediately pulled into a conversation about whether she's done rehearsing with her favorite guitar so it can be prepped stage left.

I try to stick around, try and get the inside scoop on how Robin Buckley prepares for a show, but I'm usurped by her fucking guard dog of a manager who fjsakdlfjaslkdfja FUCKING jesus CHRISTfsj

Eddie slams his hands down on his laptop keyboard and strains his neck back to look at the ceiling which is, quite frankly, an idiotic decision for a guy who gets motion sick on vehicles the size of, say, your average tour bus.

Don't get him wrong, he loves a good tour bus, loves the press van, loves the sweaty mess of a thing filled with people competing for clicks and desperate for the best quotes and--

Yeah, okay, maybe he doesn't love it, but if he's ever going to get enough notoriety in this business to write the sort of rock n' roll histories he grew up swallowing hole in the back room of his uncle's trailer, he has to go on a few shitty assignments.

Shitty assignments for alternative rock, one-hit wonders and their fucking hyper-protective managers who carry around lists of topics they're not allowed to bring up around Miss Buckley as if the girl herself isn't a goddamn open book.

How can the guy put a moratorium on her fucking home life if she herself sits down with the lowly press at lunch and twirls out story after story about her hippie parents teaching her how to roll a blunt when she was twelve years old?

How is Eddie supposed to write this damn article let alone his magnum opus if the advent of the internet has made managers and publicists everywhere so goddamn paranoid that Eddie has to use an anecdote about rabies as his hook?

Who is Steve Goddamn Harrington to tell Eddie how to do his job?

It's not that Eddie even wants to tear his little star apart; Eddie actually likes her contrary to the tension headache overtaking him on the ride between Indy and Columbus, but how is he supposed to prove why to readers if he's not allowed to say anything?

On his first day on this tour, Eddie had been forced to sit on this very bus and get a lecture from Steve Harrington, who has apparently been leading Robin's team from the small town get-go, and who is apparently God or whatever, and the thing is the guy's a prick.

He's downright insufferable, assumes the worst in people and expects their best behavior nonetheless, and Eddie can't stand his guts.

Except.

Except on day one of this tour, Steve Harrington gave them a terse lecture befitting a high school principal on the bus and then turned around and talked to the driver about his family for ten minutes before hopping out and going back to work.

And except, when they were in Chicago, he was screaming in some guy's face backstage and Eddie thought he'd discovered the real Steve, only to find out from a crew member later on that the guy in question was getting fired for trying (and failing) to hide a camera in Robin's dressing room.

And except, most of the time Steve Harrington is stern and bitchy and protective but the first time Eddie saw him talking to Robin before a show the two of them were laughing. Bright in ways that can't be faked.

Joyful.

Eddie looks back down at his computer and curses the man who is making this job so much more fucking difficult than it needs to be. Robin Buckley is a good story, without need for any embellishment.

Her start is interesting, where she comes from is interesting, her sound is even interesting despite its overnight popularity and worst of all Eddie likes her.

She's kind and open and smart as a whip-- apparently speaks four languages and is working on a fifth. She's got this sharp edge to her where she doesn't take an ounce of shit this industry throws at her and Eddie doesn't have to stretch to understand why her fans adore her.

God, he wants to write a good piece about this fascinating kid from Hawkins, Indiana, and he wants to write about the manager who she constantly reminds them she owes all her success to because how did that happen.

Eddie wants to be a fly on the wall when those two talk about ice cream, the weather, anything and he wants this article to be the one that gets him that goddamn book deal. Get Jonathan the high profile photog gig he deserves and Nancy the co-writing credit they've been dreaming of since college.

But there's still the guard dog in the way.

There's still Steve Harrington.

On the first day manager and good, Midwestern boy Steve Harrington introduces us to the star of the show, he tells us, "a toe out of line and I'll have your credentials stripped so far down the only paper that'll hire you has a whole page dedicated to Bible verses."

And as a good, Midwestern boy myself? I believe him.

Eddie thinks there's a story here, and he thinks he's the one savvy enough with loopholes to find it.

He's got three more hours 'til Columbus to figure out how.

[flagellant]

Would love to hear more about your rabid animal encounter!

It was in 2017 at the time and I was working out in the national forests of California. I came into work one day at my ranger's station and there was way more chaos than I expected--turns out that someone had reported a suspected rabid skunk overnight after it bit a dog in a nearby town and it'd been brought in for testing (which includes euthanasia).

I was super curious and had some free time before I needed to actually go out to do what I was assigned so I decided to watch some of the tests being done. I'd seen the vets take blood samples and such of wild animals in the station before--you use basically what amounts to a syringe at the end of a spear etc etc. But before it started getting messed with by us it still acted wrong.

First off: It was jittery and trembling. Wobbly is too cutesy a word--it was just slightly too intense to be wobbly. The wobbles were more twitchy and jerking, like it was constantly having to catch its balance, or it was constantly trying to react to every single minutiae of stimuli. It was also completely silent and utterly unafraid of any of us. This is one of the big markers of rabies: It fucks with an animal's brain to the extent that its fear receptors essentially rot away, because the virus wants the animal to come into contact with as many other animals as possible, and it can't do that if it's skittish. A nonrabid skunk SHOULD be huddled up in the farthest reach of the carrier curled up and scared out of its goddamned mind for being alien-kidnapped. This one just kinda ambled or stood wherever.

So anyway, we start taking blood samples, and by we I mean my coworkers because I am super unqualified for any medical treatment whatsoever of any animal.

The second the needle stuck into the skunk it stopped being a skunk and started being something else. It began writhing and jerking inside the carrier like it was trying to rip its own muscles and limbs apart to get away or get out, and the whole time it was shrieking and squealing so hard and constant that even outside the station it was loud. I've heard animals dying from predators before, I've heard skunks dying from predators before, they didn't scream like this one did. It screamed like it didn't know how to use its vocal chords or mouth, all it knew was pure unthinking noise.

Again, I'm sorry, but I really don't know how to describe the experience very well. The problem is that rabies doesn't make animals act like how they're supposed to. A nonrabid dog going absolutely apeshit is still going to recognizably act like a dog, just an absolutely apeshit one. A rabid dog going absolutely apeshit does NOT act the same. It acts with complete disregard and unawareness of both its surroundings and its own body. It isn't a living creature anymore, it's a breeding ground of rabies that has completely taken control over the dog and is now puppeting it around with the single purpose of spreading rabies everywhere it can. There's no fear, there's no thought, and I barely agree with calling what rabid animals experience as "aggression" because aggression in animals is a thing which fundamentally acts through motivation of stimuli and reaction. Aggression happens because the animal cares about what happens to the animal. Rabid aggression has absolutely no shits given about what happens to its host. It's awful.

[felidlycanthr0pe]

Title: You Deserved That Bingo Masterlist

Pairing: Katsuki Bakugou x Reader

Rating: Mature

Word Count: 1813

Warnings: N/A

Summary: Bakubites

A/N: Created for @anyfandomfluffbingo / Square(s) Filled: Biting / Cross Posted on AO3

Three years of hero study with the same 19 other people meant that most of you had figured out a routine to destress with one another. Movie nights, on a rotating schedule of choice, were a staple- especially during test surges. 

Typically, whoever’s choice it was for that week was predictable. This week’s romcom, courtesy of one Kaminari Denki, was no exception. Even in his movie taste, he was intent to lighten the mood if nothing else. 

Of course, there were some who would voice their complaints early despite remaining in the common room the entire time. It didn’t matter who was choosing- Bakugou always had something to say. 

Typically, you sat closer to him if only to hear this commentary. 

Arms crossed over his chest, leaning back into the couch, he muttered to himself. “Fuckin’ stupid, why wouldn’t you just-?”

“He doesn’t know she got the new job, Blasty,” you reminded him with a small knock to his shoulder with your own, “only the audience does right now.”

Vermillion eyes slid over to you before darting back to the screen. 

A few minutes passed before he continued: “why wouldn’t she just-?”

“She’s got an NDA,” you cut him off in a whispered tone, “c’mon Sparkles, keep- ow!”

Katsuki, arms crossed, glared at the screen. 

“Did you just fucking bite me?” You laughed, “the hell’s wrong with you.”

“Annoying,” he responded simply with a shrug. 

The bites were nothing new- some Bakugou branded way of expressing whatever emotion he so happened to be suppressing at that point in time. Excited? Bite. Happy? Bite. Upset? Bite.

“We should vaccinate (Y/N) for rabies,” Denki, against all logic and common sense, muttered. 

A small explosion sparked in his palm as he stood up. “How’s this for a vaccination, Sparky?”

“Sit, Kats,” you sighed, tugging on his shirt. “See? She’s gonna tell them soon.” 

Katsuki made a face at Denki, but sat down nonetheless.

~

A few months after movie night and you thought that he’d finally outgrown the tendency to gnaw on his emotions. You, of course, were corrected just as soon as you thought you were safe. 

You hummed to yourself as you shuffled about the dorm kitchen- placing each piece of silverware, dishware, and glassware in its designated space. Typically, running a dishwasher and putting things away shouldn’t have taken more than an hour or two. Doing the dishes for twenty people (because of course they would do Aizawa and Mic’s with the rest- the man had literally lost a limb for them) took a bit more time, even with the industrial dishwashers. 

One unlucky soul was stuck there per meal- and it just so happened to be your turn after dinner. 

It was well past nine when you felt pressure on your shoulder. You hadn’t heard them creep up, nor had you seen any movement. So sue your fried nervous system for turning around and gut punching the perpetrator without so much as a second glance.

Bewildered, Katsuki Bakugou stared up at you- crimson eyes boring holes in your own as he sat on the ground. 

“Katsuki! Are you out of your goddamned mind?! What if I had a knife in my hand?!”

He tilted his head, frowning. “Ya would’ve stabbed me?”

You stared back at him incredulously. “If you’re certain you’re alone, that there’s not going to be anyone around you and that you’re not going to be disturbed- why in the hell would you not stab someone who snuck up behind you and… pinched you? Bit you? What the-?”

“Bit.”

You rolled your eyes. “Right, why wouldn’t it be anything else?”

“I can help if you want,” he said, standing slowly. “Can’t sleep anyway.” 

It was certainly past his usual “bother me and die” time of 8:30PM, oddly enough. You rolled your eyes and threw a rag at him. “They don’t dry right on the top shelf if there’s bowls. Dry off whatever’s puddled.”

He nodded, settling into a rhythm as you finished off the last few dishes. It was a comfortable silence, and you soon found yourself humming again.

~

You frowned at the package in your hands. “What’s this?”

“Jesus, don’t look at it like that,” Katsuki muttered, “it’s just something I made. For….you.”

You glanced up at the board to check the date- February 14th. You looked up at Katsuki, choosing to pointedly ignore the beaming smile coming from several of your classmates behind him. Then, your gaze fell back to the package. 

It was tied neatly- a red ribbon around a takeout style box. There was no note attached, so you wouldn’t have had a clue who it was from had he chosen to do this the typical way. 

“Don’t think I made ‘em too spicy, but if it is I can just…remake it. Or something,” he muttered. 

You glanced back up at the board, then to the box. Carefully, you pulled the ribbon away from the box- its smooth, satin edges soft against your fingertips. You stifled a laugh when you saw what was inside. “Kats, what mold did you use?”

He stared back at you. “Mold? There’s no mold, I don’t need that shit.”

“You… okay that makes more sense,” you replied simply as you pulled out an oblong heart shape. “I was wondering if there was a broken one somewhere that I needed to put out of its misery.”

Katsuki grimaced. “If they’re so shitty, then why don’t I just-?” He lunged for the box, but you held it out of reach- nearly falling out of your seat in the process. You chose to pointedly ignore the scent of his cologne sweeping over you like a tidal wave of…what the fuck.

“Touch them and you die, Sparky,” you stated, taking a bite out of the chocolate. “They’re spicy enough. Thanks.”

“Enough? You want it more spicy?” He raised an eyebrow at you. “You get bright red when you eat my curry.”

“Chocolate’s different,” you replied, “it’s cut with the sweetness. I dunno. But they’re good. Don’t change a thing about ‘em.”

Settling into his seat behind you, he leaned his head on his hand. “Good. Didn’t really taste test anything.”

You didn’t turn around, but simply offered one over your shoulder as you watched Aizawa trudge up to the podium at the front of the room. Absent-mindedly, you shoved the box inside your desk for the time being. 

You yelped as a sharp pain rushed through your fingertips, turning around to glare at Katsuki. “What have I told you about the biting?”

“Bakugou, if you can refrain from biting your classmates, that would be appreciated,” Aizawa sighed. “Lest I remind you that drawing blood equals an incident report which also equals a phone call. Neither of us want that.”

Despite the warning, Katsuki still wore his trademark smirk, settling back in his chair and folding his hands together on top of the desk. “No, we don’t,” he replied. 

~

Even with the breeze, the summer heat had draped its suffocating weight across campus and clearly had no intention of moving. This was a type of heat with only one solution- ice cream. 

“We’re gonna run out if you keep chugging ‘em like that, bro,” Kirishima whined. 

Katsuki, with his third ice pop of the day in hand, snapped back, “it’s called quirk mitigation, Hair for Brains. You want me to drop nitro everywhere I touch?” He took a bite out of the green popsicle.

“Everyone knows you have gloves for that, Kacchan,” Midoriya sighed. 

He rolled his eyes and spoke through a mouthful of popsicle. “Yeah, well the gloves are annoying!”

“Is that lime?” You turned the corner, frozen towel in hand. “I didn’t think there were any left.” 

“There isn’t,” Katsuki stated simply, taking another bite as he flopped onto the couch. 

You frowned. “That’s the last one in the whole freezer? Can I have some then?”

“Ew, gross. Get your own,” Katsuki responded. “Sucks to suck.”

You hummed. “So you’ve chosen violence.”

With a sigh, he stuck the end of the package in his mouth and stood on the couch. “Bring it.”

You grinned, lunging forward and all but tackling Katsuki off the sofa. He hit the ground beneath you with a thud, but quickly rolled out from underneath you. As he tried to stand, you swept a leg, knocking his knees out from under him to pin him again. “C’mon you’re not gonna let me win, are you really?”

Katsuki shook his head, carefully removing the package to not spill any juice beneath your grip. “Like you’d let me live.” 

You shrugged, reaching for the popsicle in his hand. 

“I feel like someone should get an adult,” Kirishima muttered. 

“No,” you responded quickly- almost as quickly as Katsuki. 

You shuffled your knees together- at which point Katsuki took the opportunity to flip you again. Unlike your own hands, it only took one of his to pin yours above your head. He held out the popsicle above his head, well out of your reach. “Call it.”

You rolled your eyes and raised an eyebrow at him. “Is a popsicle really worth all this?”

Katsuki rolled his eyes in response and leaned backward to let you up. He extended a hand, exaggeratedly waving it in your face. “I’ll get you one from the convenience store. But I’m not going alone.”

You took the hand offered and stood up straight. “Fine. But you’re buying.”

“You’re pouting, and yet you’re getting what you want,” he sighs as he takes his shoes off the rack. 

“You don’t really have to…I was just…”

“You think I’m in the business of doing things I don’t want to do?” Katsuki retied his shoelaces, glancing up at you. “You’re crazy if you think you’re making me do anything. Now get your shoes, before it gets crowded with all the idiots finishing work.”

“I just…I just wanted some of yours,” you muttered. 

Katsuki glanced up at you, eyebrow raised. Shoes tied, he stepped forward until only a few inches separated the two of you. “Do you want ice cream, or not?”

You rolled your eyes and nodded. “But not that badly…I just….” 

He frowned, holding your chin up and looking over you- searching for something. 

“What are you…?”

“Looking for signs you’re an imposter,” he replied simply. “Cause clearly I’m talking to a different person than 30 seconds ago.” He narrowed his eyes at you. “Nothing seems to be wrong, though. So shut it,” he muttered as he gently pressed a kiss to your cheek. 

Just as soon as you were about to reach for your shoes, you felt a sharp sting on your cheek as you reeled backward. “Did you just fucking bite me?” 

He pointed a finger accusingly at you. “You deserved it, even if you are cute as hell. And you know it. Stop apologizing and move it.”

[procrastinatingsoicanreadfanfics]

timetraveling!Vikings + Christmas

Summary: how timetraveling Vikings would react to modern Christmas/what they enjoy/etc.

Tagged: @majesticwren @obsessiveformiyatwins @leithdragon @demon-of-the-ancient-world @alicedopey @ivarlover @levithestripper @batmandallyboy @akayxo09 @vrtualfairy (hmu to be added to any of my taglists!)

Masterlist | based on this request | requests are OPEN!

Ragnar

I think Ragnar likes modern christmas more than he should

He takes it like many non-christians do nowadays – fuck Christianity, i’m getting presents

Might let Athelstan drag him to church

Leaves midway tho

So bad at gift-giving that he accidentally gets you a great one

Lagertha

The BEST gift giver

Has a little table (after you show her how excel works, obvi) of the people she wants to get presents for and tracks their wishes over the course of a year

You need her at Christmas, actually

She doesn’t like the Christian part of it, but she likes the community it creates and GODDAMN Lagertha makes some good food

Athelstan

Vibes to church service HARD, even in modern times

Big enjoyer of WHAM! And Mariah Carey

Makes small, but very thoughtful gifts

Definitely always gets sick around Christmas and wears a bundle of scarves

Please don’t let him shave his head weirdly, or his brain will freeze

Bjorn

Doesn’t like Christmas

He came to the future, you have planes, let him use them

Spends his Christmas in warm places

Honestly, he might enjoy Aussie Christmas

Any excuse for beaches and bbq

Ubbe

If you want to stage a great Christmas celebration, go to Ubbe

Despite being from Viking times, he will be able to organise it better

He likes bringing people together for any occasion, and will be decorating the venue he chose like a PTA-mom with rabies (so, quintessentially, Ubbe)

Does not let snowy grounds stop him from playing football with friends/brothers

Hvitserk

LOVES Christmas

An endless supply of cookies and chocolate? Are you kidding??? The christians got something right?????

Eats everything you leave lying around

On time for everything during Christmas

Honestly, he gets hilarious gifts for everyone

Surprisingly good at singing christmas carols

Honestly, Hvitserk makes friends in all religions so his year of exquisite eating is just

Easter -> Eid -> Midsommar -> Thanksgiving -> Hannukah -> Christmas

Rinse and repeat baby

Sigurd

Spends the entire time critizising the compository value of christmas songs

Has an enemies to lovers arc with them

One day, soon after Christmas Eve, you will find a slightly drunk Sigurd in front of a karaoke machine with a thousand yard stare and the best interpretation of Last Christmas your ears will ever hear

Ivar

Christmas is a capitalist venture for the foolish designed by greedy christians

Totally does not buy super expensive gifts for his friends to brag

That Tesla outside your door? That’s not a Christmas gift silly, he’s sending you down the frozen road as a sacrifice to Odin so his bleeding ears might be saved from Sigurd

Does make an effort to put his mafia-ventures on hold for you though

He still hates Christmas

Floki

HATES CHRISTMAS. Floki hates Christmas so much. Did he already say he hates Christmas?

Hates it so much he secretly loves it.

‘Annoyed’ at Helga for baking cookies with you

‘Annoyed’ at the celebrations and people coming together

He secretly enjoys the non-Christian part of Christmas

But he just can’t get over the Jesus being born thing

Celebrates the part of Easter where he’s dead for a few days

Helga

Loves Christmas, and without shame

Turns into a cookie factory

Handmade gifts for everyone

Does a lot of charity/social work around Christmas

Enjoys ice-skating rinks as well

Tells Floki to stop moping around (he does)

[oh-surprise-its-me]

Jake gets the nickname ‘snow white’ from his dads when he’s a kid because damn if Slider thought Chris was an animal beacon then Jake must be a flashing billboard.

He finds all sorts of animals growing up, frogs, birds, dogs, cats, a cow, a pig, opossums, yes multiple. 

Chris loves it. Slider is damn sure that Jake is going to catch rabies.

It keeps going when he’s older to, he just hides it better. He keeps a squirrel hidden in his room when he’s 17 for four months, Chris finds it one day when he drops off Jakes now non bloody hockey jersey.

Jake is sitting there doing homework and it’s curled in his hoodie. Chris loves the little creature, Jake begs him not to tell Ron.

Not because Ron will make them get rid of her, no, no, he’ll give them another lecture.

They tell Ron.

He’s cutting up food in the kitchen when Chris comes up behind him sliding arms around his waist.

“What did you do.” Chris laughs, “do! What do you mean I’m great!”

Ron turns around, he leans down and kisses Chris, “great yes, guilty also yes.”

Jake makes a small cough from the doorway. “It’s not just him?”

“Christ kid what did the two of you do. If it involves fire and our shed I’m taking that assignment Tom offered me.”

“Hey! I’m not that bad!” Ron laughs, Chris spins in his arms to lean against him back to chest. “You aren’t that bad alone but your dad and you together are a dangerous combo.”

Jake takes Lily out of his hood. “Is that a goddamn squirrel.”

“Depends.”

Chris leans his head bad to look at Ron, “I already said he could keep it. He’s had Lily for four months already.”

“JACOB?” “She was dying! It’s fine! I checked her out! I hand fed her kitten formula!”

“Jesus fucking Christ kid.”

That year they have an addition to their Christmas card, Lily, in a red bow on Jakes shoulder.

[shenanaginag]

Petals on the Mulch

A Danganronpa Fan Fiction based on @drawbauchery's Bus AU

*Trigger Warnings: self-hatred, mild verbal abuse, and lots of coarse language*

~*~

Carbon, Hydrogen, and chlorine ions replacing hydrogen in the chain here and there, with some C8H4O4-2 phthalates to soften and make it more flexible. Formed into clean transparent tubes to show the fluids currently in it, but sure as hell not meant to be entered into someone’s body, like that supposedly klutzy nurse girl with the hot bod probably did when she was an “Ultra Despair Girl” or whatever the fuck Makoto said it was called. She probably just used that pathetic “I’m such a klutzy girl” shtick just to manipulate people and show off her curves. Which… fair, she’s got the goods, but why go about it in such a sneaky way? If you’ve got a body that hot, why not just flaunt it?

“Miu? You’ve been quiet for a while now.” Sakura nudged Miu out of her thoughts. “Do you…” She noticeably hesitated “have anything to add to the conversation?”

This muscular monster of a woman was put in charge of the physical therapy, obviously. But when some of the patients turned out to be problem children because they were being “too disruptive” for group therapy she got saddled with this sorry lot too. The whiney little monster Hiyoko, the ADHD stereotype personified Ibuki, the ticking time bomb Toko who’s always dragging along her emotional support girlfriend, and of course Tencrotch. Some idiot doctor decided that Miu belonged in this rogue’s gallery. At least Teru was here to keep her entertained. Dude was a mess, but at least he was straightforward about what he actually wanted. She appreciated that.

Gonta was also there too. Out of anyone HE definitely didn’t belong here, but people kept accidentally swatting at bugs and the big guy kept freaking out over it. Looking at him sniffling and being a guilt-ridden mess around her was fucking depressing. She didn’t blame him. Not even for a second. Sure he fucked up and now she has to use a bidet after taking a shit because she couldn’t think about… the thing… without phantom pains showing up around her neck. But it wasn’t his fault. It was that shit-stain of a bastard Kokichi to blame.

“Miu” Sakura prompted again, this time more sternly.

Miu stifled a moan. Last time she let one out she got confined to her hospital room for ‘inciting conflict’

“Yeah, sure whatever the last person said” she waved the question off.

“You…” the Shehemoth glanced at her notes “Feel worthless because you aren’t actually an aikido master and can’t protect anyone?”

Miu looked to her right and only just realized Tencrotch was ugly crying. It was gross, and she had snot dripping all over her face. Then she noticed what Miu said and looked up surprised.

“Really?” Tenko whimpered so pathetically that Miu couldn’t help but feel bad.

“What? Fuck no, I’m the best goddamn inventor the world has ever seen of course-“ the string of garbage spewed out before she really thought about it.

“Miu!” Sakura shouted, clearly angry now.

“Shit, wait!” Miu fumbled, her lips suddenly quivering, but it was too late, Tenko was already a heaving mess again. Worse now probably.

Miu’s mind reeled, ‘how do I get out of this?’ she tried desperately to think. Gotta go, gotta go, but where? Gotta go? Bathroom! Nailed it.

“I- I uh- gotta go- go to the bathroom! Suddenly?” She stammered “Gonna go take a massive shit!” she shouted and bolted out before anyone would stop her.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Miu didn’t actually know where the fuck she was going, but just about anywhere was better than in there right now. She sure as hell wouldn’t go to any of the public restrooms. Her room was the only one with a bidet installed. But if she got caught going back to her room too early she’d definitely be in trouble like that little imp of an idiot Kokichi.

That little clown fucker. That shit for brains, creepy ass, lying son of a rabies infested bitch. Maybe she should go find him just to bully him and blow off some steam. GOD she was so pissed right now, and he seemed like just the right punching bag. Why was she pissed off so much? It wasn’t because she got chewed out by She-hulk. She had plenty of lube left between the legs to prove that wasn’t it. Besides, she didn’t even deserve it. She didn’t mean to hurt anybody that time, so it wasn’t her fault! Right? It’s not like she actually did feel worthless because she wasn’t actually the ultimate-

She stopped walking for the first time since she left the therapy room. Where the fuck was she? A bank of windows lined an outside wall with afternoon light beaming down onto the sterile linoleum floors. Trees outside were swaying in the wind, dropping some flower petals onto the dull mulch. A little beauty amidst so much dullness and decay. She stared at it for a little while, until her eyes were drawn to a subtle bit of movement in the shadows around the corner of the hallway she was in.

Peeking around the corner she locked eyes with the embodiment of human filth himself.

“Just my luck to stumble across you, you purple puke urchin.” She sneered, trying hard to look at him like the most disgusting garbage she’d ever seen.

It was surprisingly hard to keep that appearance when she saw Kokichi slowly turn, visibly shaking as he balanced on his pathetic little cane. For the briefest moment she saw a hollow skeleton of the person she remembered seeing last. It felt chilling, like seeing a starved man hanging from the gallows, only moving because the signals from his brain were lost in the nerves, still triggering the muscles to move. This ghost only remained for a moment before it dawned an all too familiar mask and smiled menacingly.

“Miu! How nice to see you too!” the masked ghost cooed as if to an infant “Did you realize how much of a worthless insignificant piece of trash you were and run away from therapy?”

This cut Miu to her core. That’s exactly why she ran away. How did he always know? How the fuck did he always know exactly how to cut her down to a stump? She ran because she wasn’t the ultimate inventor. She ran because she couldn’t admit she felt just as powerless and pointless as poor Tenko. She ran because she spewed out the garbage that was always inside her waiting to come out. The garbage that should have been directed at her. The Ultimate Human Dumpster Fire.

“Well!” the half-baked retort came out weaker than she wanted it to. “Fo- for your information therapy’s actually-“

“Actually what?” Kokichi asked coyly “A colossal waste of time and energy to try and fix a dimwitted sex obsessed heifer in heat like you?”

“You’re worth the time and effort” a phantom voice whispered in Miu’s mind.

“No!” Miu shouted, surprising herself a little “I am worth the time and effort! And it’s actually a good thing that you could stand to spend some time in!”

What kind of insult was that? It was the worst comeback she’d ever come up with, but somehow it actually seemed to affect Kokichi. Where did that voice come from? And why did it sound like big n’ brawny girl? Was there actually something from these bullshit therapy sessions that was getting through to her? Kokichi was opening his mouth again to say something, but was hesitating longer than he usually did.

“I don’t care abou-“ Kokichi started, but Miu was faster on the draw.

“Don’t care about what?” Miu took a couple steps closer to the boy’s slightly shaking form. “About getting better? About me and what I want and need? You think I’m just a waste of space? You think I’m dumb? Well guess what? So do I!”

“You’re actually quite smart.” The phantom voice cut in again.

“But I actually am pretty damn smart when it comes down to it!” She yelled, hearing her voice echo down the corridors. She was getting quite close to Kokichi now and only just noticed how short he really was. “And fucking hell if I haven’t seen how smart you are in your own way, so why haven’t you figured out yet that you need this just as much as the rest of us losers?”

Why did she say that?! That makes it sound like she cares about him! Of all the stupid thoughts in the world. Still, something about this interaction pissed her off more than her own garbage actions. If she was getting this freaky voice in her head making her feel better about her own shit-show of a life, then why should he be a cowardly little shit and run away from the help they’d been given?

“I’m not in the mood.” Kokichi whispered coldly.

“What?” Miu shook her head, confused by the tonal whiplash.

“Just cut the bullshit Miu.” Kokichi uttered flatly, the mask suddenly gone again. “We both know you don’t actually care about me.”

Miu was stunned into silence for a moment. Kokichi started hobbling away, back into the shadows. The fight was over before she got to anything satisfactory? Bullshit! The little weaselly asshole couldn’t get away with this!

“I do too care!” Miu screamed. Outside, birds scattered from the trees.

Kokichi had stopped in his tracks, but didn’t look back. Hot stinging tears started pouring out of Miu’s eyes unbidden.

“I fucking hate you!” she continued, unable to stop herself. “I hate you, and I hate me, and I hate this whole goddamn world that stole our lives away! And I hate this stupid fucking hospital and these stupid ass therapy sessions, but goddamn it it’s doing something! It makes me want to keep caring! I’ve always cared! I cared when we were in the killing game too you know! I cared about Shuichi and Tenko and Kaede and that dumbass Kaito and Gonta… I cared about Gonta. And fucking goddamn it I didn’t want to kill you! I didn’t okay?! I just… I felt trapped! It felt like I had no choice! I’m sor-“

Miu ran away sobbing before she finished apologizing. Leaving the ghost standing alone.

She was ugly crying, just like Tenko was earlier. Snot was pouring out clogging her nose, making it hard to breath. It felt like her lungs were collapsing in on themselves as she kept squeezing out long agonizing screams. She couldn’t keep her hands from clutching her head and holding on desperately like she need to keep it from falling off her neck to floor. She ran blindly. Lost in her own misery and self-loathing. No phantom voice to save her now.

But without warning there was a very real, very very solid form that she ran into. At first she thought it was a wall with how hard and sudden the stop was, but something caught her from falling backwards with just as much solid force as the first thing. Half blinded by tears she looked up to see Sakura’s concerned face staring back.

Overwhelmed with emotion Miu flung herself into Sakura and continued crying. Surprisingly, Sakura not only permitted her, but even started patting her gently on the back and whispering quiet comforts. They stayed like this for a while, until the well of despair began to ebb and Miu started to feel numb. Eventually she backed away from her comforter’s enormous form.

“I’m sorry.” Miu chocked out, her throat raw from all her screaming. “for running away”

Sakura offered Miu a packet of tissues from her pocket. “I feel you did no wrong to me needing forgiveness.” She murmured, her voice still gravely, but tinged with compassion.

“However you do owe Tenko an apology.”

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

At the next therapy session, Miu apologized in earnest to Tenko, who, to Miu’s surprise, forgave her readily. For once, Miu actually tried to pay attention to the group conversations and even tried to contribute. People were still annoyed by the way she said things which pissed her off, but Sakura seemed pleased that Miu was actually participating. It didn’t make her weak in the knees as much as getting told off by the Titan, but it still gave her at least a bit of a praise kink buzz.

Then halfway through the session, the door opened, and in hobbled a ghost who claimed he only just now figured out how to get to the group therapy rooms.

[beewithknee]

of needles and bandaids

c.w - injections

Day 1 of Redactober '23 !

t4t milo/ollie hurt/comfort

“Hey Mi?” Ollie called softly, praying for an answer from the emptiness. Relief flooded his chest with the “Yeah?” That echoed back. Shaking his head, “uh… Nothing. Y’know what, never mind.” He laughed off semi-awkwardly. Sitting back down on the couch, Ollie pulled his knees up to chest. He cringed slightly as the sound of footsteps sounded from down the hallway. 

Great.

“Hey Sweetheart, what’s wrong?” Milo crooned softly, small smile reserved for his Mate plastered on his lips. His eyes crinkled in concern, and Ollie found himself melting under the gaze. 

“It’s nothing. I’m okay.” His voice cracked halfway through his sentence, betraying the underlying panic that danced through his veins. 

A hand settled on his thigh, bringing their gazes back together. “It’s shot day.” Milo’s soft words were a reminder. He knew. He constantly kept track of his fiance’s schedule, knowing how much the other struggled with needles. 

Ollie nodded, fingers anxiously turning over Milo’s. “Help?” It was weak, small. But he knew his other half would hear. 

“Of course sweetheart. C’mon, let’s get you in there.” He grinned, tugging lightly on their joined hands. Slipping their hands around his waist, he pulled Ollie close into his body. The violently fast beating of his heart didn’t go unnoticed by Milo. 

He squeezed his hand lightly, a comforting grounding reminder. 

Pushing into the bathroom, Milo gently pushed Ollie down onto the toilet lid. The latter went silently, a glaring indication of how loud his head was. 

A rhythmic bouncing was heard across the tile as Ollie’s pizza-socked foot struck it repeatedly. His lover did nothing to stop his anxious fidgeting, well aware the external stimulation eased at least a little fear in his head. 

Milo set to work getting everything ready and clean, pulling a vial of testosterone out of the cabinet along with a needle. An almost silent whimper broke the quiet atmosphere and he felt his heart break. 

“Oh love. It’s okay. Close your eyes for me?” Milo rested a hand against Ollie’s cheek, leaning down to brush their lips together so softly. Pulling away, he rested their foreheads together. 

A hand creeped down, feeling for soft fabric. Thumbing at the waistband of his sweatpants, Ollie smiled as he found the physical grounding he required. 

“Mi-“ Ollie stuttered, voice breaking with nerves. “Shh, I’ve got you. I’m just gonna pull your boxers up, okay?” With the nod, he did only that. He reached a thumb down to stroke at the newly revealed skin. 

Ollie was tense and jittery, breaths coming hard and scared. 

“I know. It’s so stupid to be scared of needles, especially when I’ve had so goddamn many. But I- I just can’t get over it. Like what if this is the one time…” Ollie trailed off, unsure and insecure. “You aren’t scared. It’s so stupid that I am, why can’t I be like you-“

Milo interrupted him, with a hand to his cheek, “Ollie, stop and breathe.” The latter’s eyes flew open, meeting Milo’s warm gaze. “You’re allowed to be scared. Needles are fucking creepy, you know. I used to hate them, even when Ma did all our shots as kids.”

“What? For rabies?” Ollie teased, a little spark shining through. 

Milo scoffed, pinching his chin, “No, you brat. For tetanus and shit. But yeah, I was terrified. But I learnt how good it can be. When I do my T shots, I’m not scared anymore. Wanna know why?“

Ollie nodded, “Because it means I get to be *me*. Taking testosterone and getting those injections made me live again. I get to be happy in a body I love. And that’s all I want for you. That’s not to say you aren’t allowed to be scared, but just try and focus on the euphoria it’s gonna give you. Okay, baby?” 

There were tears in Ollie’s eyes as he surged forward to kiss his wolf. It was tender, gentle and all-encompassing. Milo’s lips tasted a little like the strawberries he had eaten earlier but *fuck* if Ollie didn’t love it. 

They pulled apart, lips shining and pink under the dim bathroom light. 

“I love you Milo.”

“I love you more. Now let’s do this shit.” He grinned, wide and encouraging. Ollie’s heart rate picking up was audible in the close proximity. 

Milo leaned away to get the needle, wiping his thigh with an alcohol swab. 

“Deep breath. Focus on you, your feelings, your happiness. Focus on us and how fucking good we look.” An airy chuckle filled the space, and Milo clocked the suppressed grin Ollie was sporting. 

“You want a countdown? Or for me to just do it?” “Just do it.” Milo smiled, kissing his partner once more, “Okay Nike. Let’s do this then.”

A sharp sting ripped through Ollie’s thigh and he winced harshly, hand gripping Milo’s pants so hard he swore he’d have to re-iron them. 

“I’ve got you. Good job baby. Just a little longer, I promise.” Milo kissed Ollie’s head and pushed the liquid through the tube before pulling it away. It landed with a loud clink in the sharps bin and Milo rushed to get a bandaid. 

A loud sigh of relief bounced off the walls. Ollie felt his shoulders drop, anxiety simmering down. Absent-mindedly twisting his ring, he watched on gratefully as his partner rummaged through the cabinets. 

“You want Dora or Lightning McQueen or Boo?” 

Ollie stared up adoringly at his partner. Fuck, he was so excited to spend the rest of his life with that man. 

“Dora, obviously.” He laughed, a genuine stress-free laugh. It warmed the entirety of Milo’s heart. Pressing it down, he finished with the most delicate kiss. 

“There. All better.”

Hands found one another, like a tether unable to stay separated for long. Ollie looked up through his lashes. “Can we go cuddle now?”

Bone-deep exhaustion from the multiple near-panic attacks he’d had earlier finally caught up. Milo grinned and nodded, dragging them both to their sunken lounge. 

“Thank you. Seriously. I don’t know what I’d do without you.” Ollie swore, kissing him deep and meaningfully. It was the kind of kiss that promised forever and more. 

“I love you too. Now, let’s watch some goddamn Star Wars.”

Laughter, softness and love permeated the space. Permanently ingraining itself into every inch of their shared apartment. 

Some even say Aggro smiled that day, content his Dads had finally found happiness. 

[alexbutrandomthoughts]

Do you mind if I ask your top 10 favorite characters (can be male or female) from all of the media that you loved (can be anime/manga, books, movies or tv series)? And why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before.....Thanks...

Boy oh boy where do i even start. Honestly it's always hard to pin down my favorite characters across all the fandoms cuz I've consumed a LOT of media,but I'll try to name the current ones (warning, i am such a basic bitch this list is gonna predictable afffff. Probably.)

10. Ai Hoshino (Oshi no ko)

Ngl if you ignore most of the weird shit that happens in oshi no ko, it is such a goddamn captivating story, Ai in particular. Idk i guess i really like the idea of this "ultimate idol" who is a pathological liar (due to honestly unfortunately circumstances) having to maintain this picture perfect image, to the point where people don't even perceived her as a real person. And it's really tragic considering all she ever wanted to is to actually say "i love you" and mean it for once.

9. Killua Zoldyck (Hunter×Hunter)

Was he start of my obsession with white haired characters? Nah, but he definitely contributed. Honestly, sassy brat with a soft spot that can absolutely fuck shit up? Yeah there was no way i wouldn't have been obsessed with Killua the second he got introduced. Honestly i like Gon almost as much, but i prefer moodie baddies to sunshine characters. I would genuinely dedicate another 10 hours minimum to talk about him, but i don't think ppl will care enough to read so yeeah

8. Sunset Shimmer (MLP)

I wasn't really in the mlp fandom, so i have no idea how Sunset was perceived initially (i would assume negatively, but then again idk) so i am going off of the fact my lil sisters used to haTE on her in the first movie, but MAAAAAN I LIKED HER BITCHY SELF EVEN BACK THEN. The former star pupil of princess Celestia???? That left to another world cuz of her own hubris???? AND SHE'S PUNK ROCK???? I mean she got redeemed and joined the main six and all, but overall, probably my favorite mlp character (still mourn the bitchy attitude tho, in that regard i prefer Starlight but i digress)

7. Sans Undertale

I mean. Yeah. I already said I'm basic as fuck but like. At least i don't wanna fuck him. Anywaaay, i guess it's the air of mystery to this seemingly chill guy, who just hangs around and tells bad jokes and somehow aware of the timelines more than the rest, probably related to Gaster in some way, and maybe he's not even a monster cuz monsters don't bleed and he fucking does, what does this all mean TOBY FOX I NEED ANSWERS- and he has arguably the best fight in the entire game, so yknow. Cool guy

6. Gwen Stacy (Spiderverse)

I liked her in "In to the Spiderverse" but i absolutely loved her in ATSV. Her struggles and mistakes felt so real and I'm so glad they decide to focus on her this film (the opening sequence dead ass my favorite scene in the whole movie) and explore her backstory with Peter's death and her father, it's just adding the depth to a character that was already great just UGH chef's kiss

5. Tooru Oikawa (Haikyuu)

God he has such a slappable face, i love him. I knew from the second when the fangirls screamed, i would either hate him or love him. Every scene he was in, he served (pun intended), he slayed and made me cry. I know decent junk of the fandom are avid Oikawa haters but they can honestly suck my dic-

Anyway yeah he is my boy

4. Osamu Dazai (Bungoe Stray Dogs)

Goofy ass detective with a dark past, homosexual rival and who's also a suicidal maniac? Yeah this was tailor made for me. Can you tell i have a type because i definitely do. I just really like mfkas with slappable faces. I am a sucker for redeemed bad guys, who are now try to be good cuz 💫reasons💫. AND i am also weak for mentor apprentice trops (Atsushi/Dazai shippers back off, i bite and definitely have rabies)

3. Satoru Gojo (Jujutsu Kaisen)

Speaking of my obsession with white haired guys. Yeah, I'm not sure what can i even say that haven't been said abt this guy and reasons to love him (fuck u gege) honestly will i ever stop loving side characters who are often silly mentor figures, with lots of baggage, a gay rival and too much angst? I can only say one thing.

Nah I'd win

2. Maomao (The Apothecary diaries)

BSODGWOWBSHSOSNS9WHSOSBISGWJWVSVDIWJWJEJIEHEIEHJEBEIS. Ahem, okay so hands down my favorite female protagonist of all time. God she is just perfect. Istg all u people who never watched Apothecary diaries I BEG U TO WATCH IT PLSSSS IT'S SO GOOD. Even if you don't watch anime, i promise you this show is absolutely worth the time. Maomao is what happens when you write a good no, GREAT female character without the whole anime bs. Like???? She has her own strength and weaknesses and she doesn't need to be physically strong (full offense, marvel) or be "not like the other girls" to be great.

1. Kaveh (Genshin impact)

So uhhhh, you can really blame Will Stetson for this one. I genuinely couldn't have cared less about genshin or this random blond if it wasn't for "Writing on the Wall". It started with a banger ass song, and ended with arguably my favorite character in all of media ever. I think one of my favorite things abt Kaveh, is that compared to some of the other characters in genshin, he's really just a guy. Like bro missed the entire archon quest, mfka was just minding his own business. He is tortured architect and honestly bro has taken so many Ls in life it's kinda crazy. And well the fact that he has "a roommate" just adds more to him. Gay rival and all

Aaaaand that's 10 characters. Honestly i wouldn't call it my top 10 favorite of all time. I probably forgot some of the characters that i used to be obsessed with at some point. I just picked the ones that came first to mind :3

[virdemption]

Seek90 Headcanon Rewrite what the fuck!! (<>?/<3)

Seek initially showed up in the rooms trying to get away from Ambush after a really shitty fight and wound up lost on accident, A-90 was the one to find them and teach them about the rooms.

The start was rocky though, because they mistook him for Ambush at first. But this was very quickly resolved. When everyone goes back to the hotel, A-90 basically functions as those two's auspistice and it's effective mostly because he has strong positive relationships with both entities.

The relationship comes across as one sided to the majority of entities (Including A-90), but it isn't. A-90 is very painfully obviously in love but Seek hasn't said anything, coming off as not reciprocating. Well, they're on all levels incapable of reciprocating, right?

But they can. They do and it's physically painful. Feeling such strong positive emotions so often and suddenly worsens the crusty, tumor-like growths that spread and begin to dry them up until there's nothing left that makes Seek "Seek". A-90 does not know this.

A-90 has no intent on ever confessing to Seek. Doesn't matter since Seek already knows how he feels (and he's unaware of that) but it still looms in his mind. This won't have to end if it doesn't start.

The prospect of being in love also scares A-90 and he can't explain it. Sometimes he overthinks his crush and it becomes distressing. It's easier to suppress his feral urges when Seek is around but at the same time he feels like he'll collapse on all fours at any given moment so that just kinda makes him really nervous.

Seek sometimes goes very long periods of time ghosting A-90 in the belief that not talking to him will fix the growths, but they're still hella thinking about him so it doesn't really do shit lawl. A-90 never messages anyone unless they reach out first so he gets put under the impression that they're focused on other friends. Something something Seek's just like pop music or the like.

Whenever they do meet again... Oh boy, A-90 gets way too excited at times, sometimes spamming their messages, and if they meet in person oops he's reverted. He has pounced on them before and has also accidentally left clean gashes on their body (sometimes slicing limbs off). They heal back really well though so it's fine. Seek's only real concern with that is if any of their goo gets into his mouth.

Which yes. Has happened before. That's also how Seek eventually began to reciprocate! One day they spent like 2 hours trying to get A-90 to his room after tripping balls from accidentally swallowing some of their goo and going full rabies mode at his peak.

A-90 oftentimes rants to Seek, who very rarely has anything to say in response. They do however love hearing him talk and, unlike many entities, finds his voice relaxing albeit crunchy and a bit feral sometimes.

Speaking of, whenever A-90 gets back to his senses after reversion, he'll be embarrassed as all hell if Seek was there to witness it in any capacity. Sorry for mauling the hell out of your undercooked steak and clawing the wallpaper right off do you still think I'm handsome-

A-90's whole thing is attempting to be proper and distinguished. Seek can shatter this so painfully easily if they really wanted to, which is something almost all other entities cannot do. A-90 thinks it's probably some primal urge bullshit while Seek thinks he simply just trusts them enough (It's a mix of both).

Curious Light actually discovered Seek in the rooms while they were trying to comfort A-90 after a really bad event. This is how she eventually got back to the hotel but goddamn this was fucking scary for her to witness.

Seek can't explain why but they oftentimes gets lost staring at their reflection in A-90's armor whenever it's been recently polished. They have accidentally hypnotized themselves multiple times before due to this.

A-90's always changing blood color depending on his mood sometimes gets absorbed by Seek if the jutting razors' wounds cause it to touch them and, based on the color, it affects Seek. Red has a calming, healing effect, yellow doesn't do jack shit, and green harms them.

[thinehitmanagency]

More Silly Facts:

☆ Blaster would be absolutely awful with children. Of any age. He doesn’t pay attention to anything that doesn’t concern him. All that matters is the kid "doesn't touch anything that could give you rabies" and "don't start digging around like a nosy little rat."

☆ Unknwn is probably the gangliest motherfucker in the agency. He is not physically strong, even though he likes to pretend he is. He’s got book smarts and is a super good hacker, but he would get IMMEDIATELY cooked in a fight. But please let him believe he’s the best, most talented and strongest guy ever. His ego is frail.

☆ I don’t think he ever takes off his coat. He sleeps, works, travels, and eats in that coat. As a matter of fact, it’s barely ever been washed. Unless he spills something on the majority of it or it gets really dirty, he will always keep it on. Being away from it causes him great anxiety.

☆ Briar used to play "the can game" with his siblings. Basically, they would throw cans at the next door neighbors’ kids and if they hit their face, head, or neck, they would win. This was not very popular with any of their neighbors. Bellatrix usually always won, with Blythe being a close second.

☆ Dreadelle claims to see the dead! How crazy is that? Being a half alive doll corpse really suspends disbelief, though. Everyone just believes her when she tells them about an encounter she had with Straws or Rabecca, or whatever other ghost she’s seen.

☆ Zinc is a perfectly normal human man. There is truly nothing special about him. Of course, he still gets asked questions like, "Why do your joints creak when you move?" and "why does your voice sound so weird?" But you can rest assured that it is none of your goddamn business. He is just living his life as normally as he can, so please hold your questions and keep a safe distance.

☆ d011in7 does not sleep. He experiences something he calls "radio death," where he temporarily turns off technology within a reasonable radius and shuts down. The internet is inaccessible when this happens, and nothing will turn on. He claims it’s an "uncontrollable problem," but he’ll do it when he’s angry, irritated, lonely, or feeling ignored.

☆ You will notice & is always absent from the agency and from agency meetings. This is because she doesn’t care about any of them. Nonetheless, she still gets paid regularly. No one knows what she looks like or what her job is, aside from Silver and Unknwn.

☆ d011in7, The Prototype! The Original! Do not tell him his systems have been copied across millions of servers and used for other applications that are identical to him. Radio death might occur for good.

☆ Briar was very small and scraggly as a kid, being the shortest out of all his family members and classmates until about 7th grade. Then he hit 8th grade and he got fucked up. He came back over the summer and he was deadass 6’0’’ and he thought he was hot shit.

☆ DLL is constantly being fucked with by Unknwn. "Do u wanna have a hacking comp? :)" no he does fucking not. He wants to be left alone.

☆ Speaking of, DLL has hidden cameras around the agency. No one (other than d011in7) has found them yet, but he insists it’s not for any malicious purposes. He’s just watching. For spies. Like you do.

☆ Bonnibelle, the only mechanic before ▇▇▇▇ shows up, is constantly stealing shit from HQ. She steals from the higher ups, their funky mechanisms, their enhancements, their cogs and their wiring— everything. She claims she’s going to make a powerful super weapon for only the agency to use, without the control "of the big bosses in charge up there." The way she has described said weapon is… sinister.

☆ Cadmium does some funny little cannibalism sometimes. He’s just hungry. Lately he has been trying to curb these urges by biting down on metal with his sharp ass teeth, and fortunately it has worked for the time being. He stays in the attic above the agency, but who knows what he’s doing in there. It smells like copper up there.

☆ Mister G.L. is the local nurse and he is 100% always whacked out on sleeping pills. He has built up so much resistance to the sleep-inducing chemicals that all they do is keep him awake. Which is great! Because the agency medical office is constantly flooded with injured patients, and he could never leave someone hurt. Some say he has a "savior complex," but that is just complete and total nonsense! Him? A savior? Never! Just a brilliant, guiding light for those who need him!

[emoaro]

youtube why are you torturing me like this it is the same goddamn xmas ad every. fucking. time. please i’m going to explode my own eardrums and bleach my eyes why are you doing this to me i can’t take much more of this shit it is always one (1) ad and it is always the same ad it wouldn’t even be that much of a problem if the ad wasn’t the fucking worst thing i have ever seen in my entire existence on this hellish planet it is driving me up the wall the person’s voice and singing is so damn annoying and stupid and infuriating and the piano smashing is going to be the reason i leave the living it is november there is more than a month until december 25th why are you doing this i miss halloween it’s like it’s on purpose please i don’t even like xmas it’s so stupid what kind of ad is that it’s not even good the only thing you’re convincing me to buy is a one way ticket to hell id rather be in hell right now id take eternal suffering this is eternal suffering but at least hell has cool people because apparently pieces of human garbage can still get into heaven if they turn to the lord but i can’t because i like men the ad is so dumb and pointless and annoying this is purgatory i don’t want to buy your clothes or whatever the fuck i have enough of them whoever made that ad doesn’t deserve simple joys in life they deserve everything bad that happens to them for the rest of their life they should be sorry and feel remorse for creating such a bad thing they should be on their deathbed and amongst their many regrets in life their biggest is helping to create that wretched thing youtube i beg of you i’m on my knees susan give me other ads i’ll even take those weird military ads you gave me when i visited america over this i’ll watch a three minute ad of a crypto guy explaining ballscoin to me i’ll peel my own fingernails off i’ll watch an innocent animal die i’ll take anything i’ll do anything you want i’ll sit through double non skippable ads and not complain i’ll watch fucking leafy videos for an hour straight i will sacrifice ten newborns i’ll cross the styx i’ll fight god i’ll murder my entire family for you susan just please please please stop showing me that ad change it up i’d rather lose my only friend and die alone than watch that ad one more time i’d rather be torn apart by rabies infected squirrels i’d rather vomit up the antichrist i would die to avoid seeing that ad again why must you only show me such a stupid ad do you enjoy my anguish is that what it is do you like my purgatory you power hungry fuck you sick bastard you fucked up jerk two can play at that game you motherfucker i’ll never touch that store ever again it’s all i can hear in my head my eyes hurt from the white and red and the stupid blonde colour of the person’s stupid hair i hope your company goes bankrupt i hope your wife leaves you and you never see your children again i hope your new wife is a cheating asshole i hope your heart never recovers and hardens from the pain and you become a cold monster just like me after all this time and you find me one day when we’ve both lost everything and everyone and we’re no longer angry just numb and we fight to the death and i hope you win and you look down at my corpse and wish it was you just for a moment and for the rest of your life you wonder what we could’ve had and if killing me was what you wanted what was best and just and did i deserve it and for the rest of your days there’s a void in you that can never be filled and you hang out at pubs and scare small children who make tales about you and you’re empty so empty and you keep replaying that moment in your head and sometimes you see your wife and children older now moved on with a new person and you think back to when you helped create that ad and you wonder how it could’ve gone if you and i could’ve been friends lovers even if you hadn’t made that monstrous eyesore ear splitting ad and when you’re on your deathbed there’s nobody around you except the nurses who come to check on you and you think of me and when death comes you welcome it

[bedrock-to-buildheight]

Consider: in-universe pokemon ranking based on sociability, health, temperament, ect. Note that these rankings are very centered around how fitting pokemon are as companions, and does not reflect real animals. Please don't hand feed your local deer

Feral-grade: pokemon that lives in remote areas with limited human contact. They're unlikely to understand any human speech and behave more like real life wild animals. Might carry anything from lice to rabies

Accustomed-grade: your average tall grass encounter. Have a vague idea of what human means (food and healing, mostly). Won't bite your head off for looking at them wrong. Still goddamn disease-ridden though so take your new friend in for check-up before you storm the league

Starter-grade: friendly, curious, and healthy. Usually bred, but starter-grade wild pokemon are out there. As the name suggests, they are usually given out as a child's first pokemon bc they're harder to fuck up.

Competitive-grade: the showline of pokemon. Always bred, sometimes not all that good at being a pokemon, and the upkeep can be outrageous, but they're extremely good at what they're born to do.

Better name suggestions are welcomed these are kinda bad

[steveharringtonsspecialjar]

hello! can I request a vance hopper x f!reader where she has to clean him up after a fight? thank you!

how the hell did someone find my post that fast😭😭

Warnings: Mentions of Blood, Fluff, Mild Cursing, Vance Hopper is a warning himself.

But ohmygosh I love this scenario so here you go <3

The hallways of the school were bustling with children as they gathered around to watch the two boys fight.

Curses and words slurring together into loud shouts echoed throughout the school, as well as loud thumps of fists connecting to faces.

“KICK HIS ASS, VANCE!” One of the dumbasses encouraged as You tried to fight your way through the crowd to see what kind of trouble your best friend had gotten into now.

And there you saw it, Vance, your best friend, straddling a seniors body with his hands around the guys throat. His grip wasn’t tight enough to actually kill the boy, just enough to scare the shit out of him.

You didn’t know what to say, you didn’t know what to do…Suddenly, Vance loosened his grip on the guys throat, the senior choking out for air. “Keep your goddamn mouth shut next time.” The blonde headed boy huffed out through his teeth as he got up off of the boy.

His knuckles were dripping with both his blood and the other guys blood as he left the scene before the teachers could arrive, but he wasn’t getting away this easy. Oh no. Not from you.

“Vance.” You called out, speed walking to catch up with him, though he acted as if he didn’t hear you. “Vance!” You raised your voice a bit louder, causing him to glance to his eyes back to look at you.

“What, Y/n?” He huffed in annoyance as you caught up to him, you were both heading towards the bathroom area without you even realizing it. “What do you mean ‘What’?? What the hell happened back there?” You chuckled out, looking at him as if he were a bit crazy.

“He’s been pestering almost everyone around the school and then he decided he’d start on me, so I taught him a lesson.” He shrugged, hearing the shouts of teachers in the distance.

“Fuck.” He muttered, you glared back just before rounding the corner with Vance and saw teachers down the hallway trying to help the idiot who just got beat half to death.

Your pace quickened as the bathrooms came into sight, “In here.” He mumbled, opening up the teachers bathroom door because it was the only one that wasn’t just a large room with stalls.

“You’re in deep shit, y’know?” You raised an eyebrow as you watched him wet a paper towel at the sink, “Yeah, yeah, I know. But right now, that’s not what I’m worried about. I have blood everywhere and my entire head hurts and so do my hands.” The curly blonde leaned against the porcelain sink as he started trying to clean the blood off of his face.

“Shit…Y/n, will you do this please? The bastard bit my hand and it hurts to even try to move it right now.” Vance turned to you with a look of defeat on his face. “Give it here.” You playfully sighed as you set you bag down on the ground and took the wet paper towel from his hand.

“Wait, he bit your hand?” You asked with a slight laugh as you stepped incredibly close to Vance and began gently cleaning the blood from his nose. “Yeah, the marks just still barely there. Look.” He bit back a small smile at the fact it made you laugh as he pointed at the palm of his hand.

“Let’s hope you don’t get rabies.” You muttered, Vance chuckled as he closed his eyes and leaned a little bit farther back. Although he was in pain, it still felt incredibly calming to have you this close to him.

“This might hurt a little bit, sorry.” You warned before swiping over his bloody knuckles. “Agh, fuck…” Vance winced, his body cringing up as you cleaned the blood from his bruised and cut up knuckles.

“Sorry, sorry, sorry.” You kept repeating, trying to keep him calm. “It’s ok.” He breathed out in a slightly high pitched voice, the pain slowly subsiding. A small blush formed on your face when you had to clean the blood off of his forehead.

Him being a few inches taller than you caused you to have to stand on your toes a bit in order to comfortably reach without your arm getting tired, you were now almost eye level with him and thank God his eyes were closed because you got to admire every little detail on his face.

Then his eyes opened, you quickly changed your gaze to look at his forehead where you were cleaning the blood off at. Your fingers worked quickly to get this over with faster as the tension arose in the room.

“You gotta stop getting into these situations, Vance.” You muttered in a serious tone, going back down to his nose to make sure you got everything.

God, his name coming out of your mouth sounded heavenly. Your voice sounded like smooth honey whenever you used that tone, “I know, Y/n, I know.” He whispered out, as he closed his eyes again.

“Alright, I think I got it all.” You smiled, his blue eyes meeting your e/c ones as he opened his eyes again. You stepped back so he could turn around and look in the mirror. “Thanks, Y/n.” He gave you a small smile.

“Now time to deal with the consequences of your own actions.” You grabbed your bag up off of the floor and slung it around your shoulder, “Will you wait in the office with me? I don’t wanna be in there alone.” His eyes had a different look in them now, almost begging you to go with him.

“Yeah, I will.” You reached out your hand and grabbed his, giving it a gentle squeeze before opening the bathroom door. His hand fell out of yours as you walked out into the hallways and to the office.

The End. :)

[hairstevington]

“Well, this is new…”

Steve x Eddie (realizing feelings, some good ole gay panic)

***Spoilers for Volume 1!!

Ao3 Link

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So…ya come here often?” Eddie said as he walked side by side with Steve. He couldn’t believe any of this was happening. It was a completely normal week, and then….He tried not to think about Chrissy, but he was sure that image would never leave him. And now here he was, diving headfirst into a fucking lake and fighting some sort of demon bats in the Upside Down with Nancy Wheeler and Steve Harrington. It was madness. Absolute goddamn madness. He’d always been the freak, the weirdo. Steve and Nancy were the popular kids, the ones with normal lives. And yet here they were, facing atrocities Eddie had never dreamed of, barely phased. In the Upside Down, Eddie wasn’t a freak. He was just a guy, scared out of his mind.

“Ha, only once before this. But I always was dying to come back.” Steve remarked, dryly.

“Well, I can see why.” Eddie said, kicking a rock out of his way as he continued walking. Maybe it was silly, being so cavalier, but Eddie had always used humor to cope with trauma. Everything around him was so dark, he couldn’t help but try to make it lighter. “So, when did this all start?” He asked, gesturing to everything around him.

“Uh, I don’t know. Junior year. It’s not something I seek out, I just kinda keep getting thrown into it.” Steve responded.

“I never pegged you as such a badass, Harrington.” Eddie teased, leaning in towards Steve and grinning.

“First of all, ouch.” Steve started, flipping a lock of hair out of his eye. Eddie smirked in response. “Secondly, blame Dustin.”

“Dustin?!” Eddie repeated, chuckling lightly. “What did that little shrimp do?” Steve thought about this.

“Let’s see. He raised a demodog in his bedroom in order to impress a girl, got us locked in an underground Russian spy base, and generally just keeps getting himself into trouble.”

“What an idiot.” Eddie joked. It all sounded ridiculous, but nothing could shock him anymore.

“Yeah, but he’s my idiot.” Steve replied, smiling. “That kid’s too smart for his own good. He’s gonna rule the world someday, I swear.”

“Yeah, probably.” Eddie agreed. He’d grown fond of Dustin since he joined Hellfire. He took Eddie seriously, and treated him like an actual person instead of a freak. “At least the dog part sounds nice.”

“It wasn’t.” Steve assured. He paused, arranging his hands into a big imaginary box - side to side, then up and down. “This big. Lots of teeth. No face.” He explained, wincing. The movement of his arms had irritated the wound in his abdomen.

“Shit, you ok?” Eddie asked, concerned. Steve nodded, but clutched his side. “Can I see?”

Eddie peeled back the fabric covering Steve’s lower stomach. Yep. That was a chunk taken out for sure. “Damn.” Eddie announced.

“How bad?” Steve asked. He’d never been injured by one of the creatures from the Upside Down before, and as much as he tried to keep his cool, there was only so much he could take. Robin constantly reminding him of rabies also did not help.

“Uh, I’ve seen worse.” Eddie responded, not admitting that he’d only seen worse in movies. “It’s just your six pack is now more of a five pack.” He teased.

Steve scoffed, playfully. “Still more than you.”

“C’mon now, you don’t know that.” Eddie winked at Steve, then knelt down in front of him to get a closer look. Huh. Steve was not prepared to be thinking about Eddie Munson without a shirt on today. In some ways it was more alarming than everything else that was going on. Steve hadn’t really had a guy friend his own age since Tommy, the asshole he ditched sophomore year. Still, seeing Eddie kneel in front of him made him feel differently than he’d expect. Was the bite in his side making his stomach feel this way?

Eddie looked underneath the makeshift bandage. It was hard to tell exactly what was going on, considering it was dark all around him and the wound was covered in blood. He wished he had something to clean it with. Even if there was water around, Eddie didn’t trust anything from this place to be any sort of sterile. “You could spit on it.” He suggested. Steve looked down at Eddie, still perched on the ground in front of him.

“I’m sorry, what?” Steve responded. Eddie couldn’t tell if he was annoyed or amused.

“I heard somewhere that spit is a natural antiseptic. Makes you heal faster or something.” Eddie said. He knew he’d heard this before, he’d just personally never tried it.

“How am I supposed to…? How much saliva do you think I have???” Steve sputtered incredulously. Eddie was almost certain now they were joking around. It was all so crazy, everything about this situation. Eddie burst out laughing, and Steve followed suit. They allowed themselves to laugh for a few moments before Steve stopped to clutch his side again. With his other hand he reached out to Eddie, who gripped it firmly to pull himself up. Eddie jumped to his feet, stumbling for a second trying to regain his balance. Steve instinctively reached out to grab Eddie’s arms on both sides, stabilizing him. “You good?”

Eddie nodded. “Yeah, sorry. Just a little light headed.” He looked into Steve’s eyes. He was kind of beautiful actually. I mean, the guy had just been through hell, and he still looked like a movie star. Steve was a little younger than Eddie, but he was still always jealous of him in high school. There was just something about him. Probably the hair. But now, Eddie had found that Steve was genuinely a cool person too. God dammit.

“Yeah, you’re telling me.” Steve agreed. His hands lingered on Eddie for a few moments more than they needed to. He wasn’t expecting Eddie’s arms to be so…muscular.

“Hey, shitbirds! Catch up, maybe?” Robin’s voice echoed from afar. Neither Steve nor Eddie realized how long they’d been standing there in place. Nancy and Robin were way up ahead, waiting.

Steve dropped his hands. “Right, yeah. We should keep walking.” He told Eddie. “We’re coming!” He called to the girls.