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pennyserenade · 1 year ago

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Hello! Hope you’re doing well!! I’m not sure you’d like followers to respond to/ interact with your posts w your thoughts in the tags but I just wanted to say that I totally agree w your thoughts on Coryo and Sejanus LOL. Im v surprised (tho I guess I shouldn’t be given how old I am at this point + the no. of fandoms I’ve been in) that people can read them so differently from the novel. Coryo is an unreliable narrator and that makes it kind of fun to read because his pov shouldn’t always be taken as the truth. In fact I think it’s fun to read how differently his peers view him/ his r/s w other people vs what he himself perceives. Sejanus is such a nice, sweet boy and it’s kinda sad that other people don’t read him that way just because the book is filtered through coryo’s thoughts haha. He’s kind and dares to stand up for what he believes in… I think the saddest thing abt his story is that he was genuinely trying to help others directly but unfortunately the people he spoke to weren’t the most honest/ dependable (I don’t think the stuff with the rebels would have gone down well) and he also trusted Coryo (I don’t blame him cause Coryo was the only “nice” person in the Capitol) 😭 I suppose that’s also how difficult it is to deal w people sometimes IRL (in extreme situations). Anyway ya just wanted to share my thoughts :x feel free to ignore if this isn’t something you’re ok with!!

hi nonie! i'm absolutely okay with followers interacting with my tags and posts/coming to talk about this stuff with me! as you can probably tell i've got a lot to say about this stuff - i'm just a chronic in the tag poster lol.

because suzanne collins wrote the ballad of songbirds and snakes in a third person point of view, i think that readers have taken to assuming that what they're getting is an unbiased narrator, when in fact we are still very much getting a biased point of view from coriolanus. sure, we are distanced from his thoughts--not exactly seeing things through his eyes as we did with katniss--but that doesn't mean we don't have access to him and that his thoughts aren't distorting what we are seeing. i've thought a lot about the reasons suzanne collins might've chosen to use third person pov when she used a first person pov for the rest of the novels, and i don't think there was one definite reason. some of the brilliance of suzanne collins' writing lies in the fact that you do have derive these meanings for yourself at times. personally, i like to think that she chose to use third person pov because this story, while very much coriolanus-centric, belonged to characters like sejanus plinth and lucy gray, too.

the fact that this book came out during the trump's presidency isn't at all lost on me. i think what suzanne collins was saying was: look how badly this system failed this once privileged white boy. for all intents and purposes this should make him angry, and here are these district kids who have suffered just as he has. he can relate more to them than he can to any of his capital peers. he knows what it is to hunger and suffer and fight for your life every day, to be made to perform. when coriolanus turns his back on sejanus plinth and lucy gray baird, it is so tragic because he was meant to side with them and yet at the end of the day he turned his back on them because he wanted to be with 'his people.' he upheld this system that had so failed him because he thought people like lucy gray and sejanus plinth were primitive and less than because that's the mindless shit he had been fed his entire life. this is exactly what happened during that election. i've seen countless white people, who are every bit as poor and destitute as the immigrants that seek to come to this country for help -- if not more -- turn their back on them and support trump. even the poorest of whites think they are better than the richest of latinos or black people because this what their systems teach them, and it makes them feel good to think that.

i think that's why sejanus was district 2 turned capital. i believe that this was commentary on how, no matter how far poc and/or immigrants come, these white people will always view them as less than and that the system will never be forgiving of them. i do genuinely believe that coriolanus thought that sejanus' parents would save him in the end, and the fact that they couldn't was so shocking because he had, up until that point, seen the ways wealth had benefited plinth. he could not conceptualize a world where wealth wouldn't get a person what they wanted because he did not know what it was to be district. they did not see sejanus plinth, heir to the plinth fortune. they saw a district rat, a nameless, faceless traitor to kill. it is no surprise that coriolanus snow climbed to the top on the back of sejanus plinth tragic ending, because that's simply what happens every day.

i do understand and don't absolutely hate the conversations people have surrounding sejanus' privilege and what he chose to do with it/ what he chose not to do, but i think to consider sejanus an annoying, selfish character is erroneous. he was a boy who knew that this system would never favor him and was trying his best to envision a world where it might, and yes he did make stupid rash decisions, but at the end of the day what killed him was coriolanus snow and snow's desire for power. sejanus plinth was not stupid for trusting coriolanus snow, either; coriolanus snow was evil for betraying the boy's trust for his own self-serving agenda.

it is hard to live in a world like this. even as a white woman with a mexican father, i have have had to experience the kind of things sejanus did with people talking poorly about him and his family behind his back, and openly to his face. i am not accepted by either side and never will be, just as he wasn't. i will say i do experience immense privilege because of the color of my skin, and i won't ever pretend that i don't know that, but that's what i'm talking about: no matter how much i look like them, and act like them, i will always be a mexican's daughter and i am happy about that fact. i am mexican as much as i am white but it doesn't make the fight i have to struggle because of it any more fun.

#misc.#the hunger games #coriolanus snow #sejanus plinth #lucy gray baird #hunger games analysis

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danplansfwtickle-blog0 · 10 months ago

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ill have these questions answered as if danplan characters are answering them!

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1. What’s your favorite tickle tool? (added: to use against)

Daniel: ill use anything against my friends, just as long as its very affective and it irritates them, especially stephen.

2. Favorite Ler? (Tag them if you dare~)

Annabelle: i don't know, its hard to choose...hmm ill say daniel, he can be a load of fun!

3. Favorite Lee? (Tag them to call them out~)

Stephen: keep this in between us, although its obvious, but its always gonna be hosuh

4. Opinion on blindfolds/restraints? Why or why not?

Jay: not into them, too much for me to handle

5. A spot that gets you squealing?

Hosuh: .... 0///0 umm, m-my neck....

6. How long do you estimate you could last before calling mercy?

jay: a short while probably, it doesn't take a lot, but if i was nervous before hand, then id call it before anything would even happen..*timid giggling*

7. Ever have tickle fantasies?

Stephen: ....no comment..

8. Why did you make your tickle blog?

ME: because i want to share my special interest combined with my favorite youtuber of all time, danplan! and hope that people will find it just as entertaining as me and a friend does! also because i wanna see danplan in a new light such as a wholesome topic, such as the TK community on tumbler, originally i was gonna have it happen in wattpad but found tumbler more interesting instead and had finally found my place here! im happy about it whole heartedly <3

9. Does anyone irl know of your interests?

ME: no, im way too uneasy about sharing it :(

10. Can you say the t-word?

Daniel, Stephen and Jay: yes.

Hosuh and Annabelle: no.

11. Verbal teases, yes or no and why?

Daniel: yes..no......maybe...

12. Upper body tickles or lower body tickles?

Hosuh, Daniel and stephen: upper body.

Jay and Annebelle: lower body.

13. Neck or ear tickles?

Jay: ears

14. Pinned on your back, or your stomach?

Stephen: its easier to shoot glares of hatred into the person who's torturing you on your back, back for sure.

15. What do you love about the lees you know?

Daniel: stephen and jay, they get annoyed with me everytime, i love their hatred haha

16. What do you love about the lers you know?

Hosuh: stephen told me to keep this a secret between us but im gonna break a promise just answer, he pampers me afterwards and gives most of the affectionate playful attention to me.

Annebelle: jay is very gentle with me when he knows that the moment calls for it and on the other hand we end up get in a game of cat and mouse, our fav part when were in a good mood, sometimes its a game of hide and seek <3

17. Feathers or Paint Brushes?

Daniel, stephen, jay and annabelle: feathers.

Hosuh: paint brushes, for art reasons.

18. How long have you known about your interests in the community?

ME: not too sure, probably over a year since i have been here for that long pretty much? thats my guess.

19. What’s your favorite way to be tickled? (As in provoked, teased into asking, etc.)

Annabelle, Stephen and Jay: provoked.

Hosuh and Daniel: teased through body language and facial expressions, its more tense that way.

20. Are you/Do you like Polite Lees or Bratty Lees? (Asking for tickles vs Pissing someone off for tickles)

Stephen: im obviously bratty, idiot *eye roll* but i do love to irritate hosuh every now and then *cocky smirk*

Hosuh: polite lees, even though stephen is cleary fun to tease when hes upset :)

Jay: bratty, too fun to pursue such as ann, sometimes i pursue her even when shes having a little bit of a bad day, just to lighten her mood.

(i did my best on this T-T)

#sfw tickling community #danplan #danplantickling #actually stephen #stephen #hosuh #plan3 #oddjayalter #jay #daniel

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charcubed · 3 years ago

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I keep seeing posts that are like "interpretations of bi!Dean and gay!Dean are equally valid!" and I used to be like, sure, straight!Dean is definitely wrong but beyond that, see him how you want, who cares.

But now (esp after the Last Call script) I just don't understand the gay!Dean truthers? I follow quite a few on sm, and when I initially followed them I was like "they accept Dean is queer, that's good enough for me." But now they're really starting to get to me and it's not really worth arguing about to them, but I wanted to rant to you about it, cuz you get it.

The script literally included "gorgeous women" in the bar. Dean has canonically been sexually AND romantically attracted to women. He's based off THEE bisexual Neal Cassady.

Like I'm not really trying to defend m/w relationships (lol) but why do even queer ppl insist on erasing his identity when it's so clear? Why do they have to take that away?

Gay!Dean in AUs is one thing, but in the actual, textual canon of the show, Dean is bi. And no, gay!Dean and bi!Dean are NOT equally valid interpretations. And I don't think I'm an asshole for saying that 🤷🏼‍♀️

Sorry it took a few days to get to this. Work and life have kept me busy and tired!

Unironically and non-sarcastically, Anon, I'm glad you've seen the light and seem to understand this topic more now. You are, of course, entirely correct. And you're not an asshole for saying it either.

I'm going to take this opportunity to answer your (potentially rhetorical) questions, and also bounce off of you and lay some stuff out about this topic in general at length for the first time–despite the fact that it may turn me into public enemy #1 again. I am already hated for non-combatively voicing these facts on Twitter (this thread tends to be considered one of the "ground zeroes" of the nonexistent "debate" lol), but I have avoided being dog-piled on Tumblr so far, so... fingers crossed I can miraculously keep it that way!

My hope is that anyone who is predisposed to taking this topic very personally just moves on instead of attacking me (or subposting me?) for any of what I'm about to say. I'm also not forcing anyone to read this, before anyone's like "that's way too many words" or "it's not that serious lol."

I do think this topic is important. I've made the decision to publicly spell out why. And if anyone doesn't want to read it, that's their prerogative.

To your questions, Anon:

I think a lot of this comes down to a fandom-wide problem (all fandoms recently, not just SPN) of not understanding the difference between headcanon and canon, the dimensions as to why that distinction does have its uses and its necessity, and the value in both. I'll get into this later.

But in this fandom specifically, based on observation and lengthy conversations I've had with a dozen long-time fans who are my friends... I personally think it's maybe a new dimension of viewpoint that's branched out from a holdover of "all interpretations are valid" being the party line people have clung to a very long time. (That’s also true in other fandoms, but I think it’s especially true here.) It's a form of solace people don't want to deviate from. No one wants to be seen as or feel like the ~jerk~ who's ~invalidating another person's view of canon~ in response to someone else's knee-jerk reaction of hurt. This is a fandom with early-2000s cultural baggage and context, where people dealt with feeling like the "crazy fangirls" who shipped Destiel and dared to call out queer subtext. Misha's "You're not crazy" tweet exists for a reason. I do feel like a lot of well-meaning people–aside from misunderstanding or being ignorant to the analytical roots of this topic and why they absolutely matter–just know what it feels like to have their thoughts on queer content in a show feel "invalidated," and they don't want to be perceived as doing that to other people. And/or: they’ve felt invalidated before (in this fandom or others!), and so they’re hypersensitive to anything they perceive as doing that to them again, especially if they tied personal identity into the projections they’re making onto the media they enjoy.

I understand that people don’t want to seem ~mean~ or make waves. I also don't want to seem mean or be mean, which is why I try to be as clear as possible whenever I talk about this and I never go after people directly (or interact/reference any of the many subtweets from people who openly talk shit about me. haha). But the facts shouldn't be seen as "mean"; they are simply facts. And yes, they absolutely matter.

Because the thing is... none of the above has any bearing on the nuances of the topic at hand, the indisputable fact that Dean is bisexual in canon and that claiming otherwise is erasure, and the truth that none of this should be seen as a threat to people's headcanons.

These are all things that people should understand, and I will not apologize for knowing that and saying it. Misunderstanding this–making the false claim that “all interpretations of Dean’s sexually are equally valid as long as you see him as queer”–is an act of bisexual erasure in this context, and it often (unintentionally!) plays into biphobic talking points. And yeah, in my opinion, that’s something people should care about because it’s worthy of both personal and fandom examination. It is, in fact, why “representation” matters at all.

Let’s not kid ourselves: the bulk of this fandom-wide discourse is about Bi Dean vs Gay Dean. So, y’know, that’s the bulk of how I’m going to address it to just get it all out there.

Right out the gate, let me clarify this: I am not saying–now or ever–that those who are self-proclaimed “Gay Dean truthers” or argue that “Dean being gay in canon is a valid interpretation” are deliberately coming from a place of malice and the intent to contribute to bisexual erasure. By all means, I’m sure most aren’t! Nonetheless, intent does not equal impact. I’ve even seen people say “I’m a Gay Dean truther and I’m bisexual, so how could I possibly be contributing to bi erasure by arguing for Gay Dean?” But in this situation–as in any other–no one is immune from unwittingly perpetuating harm, even including bi people. And it’s important to understand why that is.

“Interpretations” are not opinions, not all are equal, and they do require some level of skill. This is not a personal attack, or a moral judgement on anyone, or somehow a threat to people’s enjoyment of a favorite character. It is just fact.

Gay Dean is not a valid possibility in canon. There is no lens that justifies an argument of it with canonical basis. I have to break down why, in order to sufficiently express why claiming otherwise is a harmful position to take, so bear with me.

(No, this is not an invitation for a Gay Dean truther to treat this like a “debate” with me or waste time writing out a counterargument. Please just exit the tab if you’re somehow here battling that urge.)

For someone to say that Dean is gay in canon, here is an incomplete list of what has to be erased, ignored, or explained away:

• His sexual attraction to, romantic love for, and relationship with Cassie.

• His sexual attraction to, romantic love for, and relationship with Lisa (whether or not one thinks she was ever the ~ultimate love of his life~, attraction and love were present.)

• His stash of and enjoyment of porn that includes women, which is referenced many times.

• The moments where he was seduced by a female-presenting monster.

• Each and every time he made a reference to or joke about his attraction to women.

• Any fling he ever had with a woman on screen, and the enjoyment he had in the process.

The man is canonically sexually and romantically attracted to women, and he has acted upon that and even enjoys that about himself in wildly diverse contexts. It is a blatant part of the text of the show. (The fact that we are at the point where this is somehow a main point of contention rather than his attraction to men does make me feel a tiny bit insane, to be honest.)

Now, in my experience (which I don’t claim is comprehensive!), the people who argue for Gay Dean tend to explain ALL of this away under some form of universal umbrella of Dean being “performative,” a variation on compulsive heterosexuality they ascribe to him. The claim or explanation tends to be that Dean was performing a mostly-faked attraction to women based on his father’s expectations and outward pressures he received in the culture of his life. Moments are often cherry-picked out of context to support this “reading.”

Who is Dean supposedly performing FOR, even in the moments where he acts on his attraction to women when he is alone? How does this explain his significant relationships with women like Cassie and/or the legitimate visible enjoyments he received from those interactions, as well as his flings with women throughout the show? How does this explain things like the Last Call script, where Dean is very clearly written as attracted to “gorgeous women,” a factoid that is not only very clear on screen but also (of course) written in literal black and white?

(There are no sufficient answers to these rhetorical questions. Once again: please do not waste time trying to give me any.)

And what evidence are Gay Dean people using for comphet or performative Dean? The “evidence” is often a misread of canon, pointing towards the consistent theme and false goal presented in the text of the show of characters’ efforts to strive for an “apple pie life,” aka a heteronormative ideal family. Gay Dean people misrepresent what this theme and through-line in the show is actually about, which is the totality of learning to accept your life rather than striving for something ill-fitting, that what you need and want need not be mutually exclusive (family life including fulfilling romance + hunting life can coexist), family is what you make of it and how you define it, and there are no true limitations on what all of this “should” be. While these themes are inherently queer, they are not about narrow performances of masculinity, femininity, or sexual identity, but about making space for ALL forms of all of the above–AND about identifying what it is that one wants and thinks they can’t have.

Namely, for Dean, that’s a version of settling down in a life that fulfills him in every direction, with an open and honest mutual relationship with the person he is in love with. This latter point would be true whether Cas was a man or a woman (though the fact that he is a man of course adds further dimension of interest to the story). Dean doesn’t think he can have a romantic relationship / family that lasts, and by later seasons that yearning is a key part of his character. The times it didn’t work out for him weren’t because those other people were women, but rather because the “lesson” he internalized from traumatic instances of loss is that hunters don’t get to do ~the love thing~ or get the settled down life. This is stated in the text of the show multiple times, and that’s also why Dean seeing examples of hunters who made any kind of balanced life work (especially masculine queer hunters like Jesse and Cesar) is pointed and purposeful. To say it’s about comphet instead (with no sufficient canon evidence that supports that) disregards a key point that’s central to Supernatural’s story, and in my opinion it disregards it to its detriment.

For Dean’s journey in particular, it is about freedom from limitations of structure, and knowing that he contains multitudes. The things he got from John–loving classic rock and loving his car, for example–are no less core joyful parts of Dean simply because they originated from his father. Dean can love classic rock and still occasionally love a Taylor Swift song, for example. He can love cowboy movies and manly movies, and also enjoy chick-flicks. It’s the idea of learning that there are no limitations, not that masculine interests are not inherently something he loves for himself or that aren’t important parts of his identity. It’s an expansion to openly include more, not a switch or a narrowing. The same applies to his sexual attraction and his queer identity. He can be attracted to cowboys and bikers, and also be attracted to gorgeous women. Him being attracted to / loving women does not mean he cannot and does not feel attraction and love for men; likewise, him being in love with a man does not mean he wasn’t and isn’t attracted to women.

(“Last Call,” as an episode, exists in part to drive the totality of these points home, and emphasize that Dean’s attraction to men is something he’s known about himself for most of his life and acted on previously. So is most of the queercoding and queer subtext applied to Dean–which is specifically coding him as bisexual. His attraction to men is sometimes established or made clear because it echoes his attraction to women, etc. etc. Dean’s canonical attraction to men is a whole other post.)

So here we come to why saying otherwise and trying to shoehorn a comphet narrative onto Dean in canon is harmful:

Aside from the fact that to claim Dean’s joyful attraction to women is performative is to cut out chunks of the story and is thus not supported by canon, and it relies on making assumptions about and projecting onto the text… unintentionally or not, the implication is that bisexuality is not queer enough, or that being gay is somehow “queerer” and thus more compelling and a preferred concept, and that attraction to different genders is a heterosexual / straight trait requiring removal. No one is queering a text in a more revolutionary way or unlocking a ~secret good Supernatural~ by making a bisexual man into a gay man. That’s simply not how this works.

“Preferring” an argument for Gay Dean in canon requires explaining away or misreading all of those moments Dean has with women, essentially replacing them with trauma or suffering or discomfort that–in my observations–also sometimes rely on stereotypes of gay men. It also involves potentially preferring to twist them into behaviors Dean must have universally put himself through not out of genuine joyful desire but at minimum because he felt like he “should” or at maximum in an attempt to “fix” his “gayness,” even when no one was watching. And it points to the pressures Dean experienced about living a life that fit him fully–pressures that exist not just in his world, but also in our patriarchal world and society–and it implies that queer people can’t authentically experience attraction or love to someone of a different gender, because maybe they’re actually just “performing” the heteronormative ideal. As in: a “visually queer” relationship is the end goal, right? For Dean, that’s an m/m relationship... so surely m/f matters less, or maybe it can’t be a genuine and significant part of a queer person’s life.

Once again: I do not think any of this is intentional on the part of Gay Dean truthers, nor do I think it’s done with malice. Nonetheless, these harmful biphobic viewpoints permeate these conversations and misconceptions when people say these arguments are valid.

There is no canonical basis for explaining away all of Dean’s moments with women, and the story does not provide or point to any kind of cohesive narrative reason to do so. YES, people absolutely experience comphet in real life, and those experiences are valid and exist. YES, real gay men can and do sleep with or have nuanced romantic relationships with women before realizing they’re gay later in life. No, that does not mean that’s how analysis of a fictional character in a fictional story always works, especially in regards to a story built over time like Supernatural’s unique approach and the way it was molded to place queerness and specifically bisexuality at the core of Dean’s story.

Ascribing comphet to Dean in canon–or making any other insufficient justification for explaining away his attraction to women–is personal projection. And yes, it is bisexual erasure.

This is not a position fueled by personal hurt for me, as I would say the same here whether or not I was personally bisexual. It is an acknowledgement that these conversations don’t exist in a vacuum, and that’s something everyone should care to understand. I know what comphet storylines look like in fiction, and I know they are worth defining as such, and in other fandoms I even defend that very loudly. This is not the case here, and to say it is requires mental acrobatics that are objectively unsupported by canon... and invariably insisting otherwise perpetuates one of these harmful biphobic viewpoints whether or not one realizes it.

To say Gay Dean is a legitimate read of canon–which it is not–supports people who are erasing his varied sexual and romantic attraction to a different gender simply because they’ve decided they want to ignore that. “I like the idea of Dean being gay” does not mean that he is gay in canon, and writing meta to that end is a problem. It’s not an invalidation of someone on a personal level or some weird variation of homophobia to say that, and I do think people should maybe examine why they seemingly like the idea of him being gay more than him being bi, or why they staunchly defend it (or any other “different queer reading”) as a possibility.

I understand there may be the urge to be like “is it that serious” or “this is just a CW show,” but to that I would say… then why are we all here?

Clearly, most people do still care about queer representation on some level and understand that queer subtext is present and acknowledge that Dean isn’t straight... hence the origin of this new prevalent concept of “as long as you say Dean’s queer then it’s fine.”

But in any piece of media, the text is the text is the text. The text can also be compelling, and fascinating, and contain value whether or not it’s an exact reflection of you personally as a fan and as a person. Sometimes there is arguably even greater value in being able to find reasons to relate to the humanity of a character or in a story even though elements differ from who you are personally. It is an exercise in empathy, and it is a pillar of why humans tells stories to each other to expand our viewpoints, and it sometimes results in examining the sources of that empathy. It’s why “representation matters”: not just so we can see ourselves, but so we can see others, and find reason to empathize despite differences. There’s unquantifiable power in that, and it’s also why the diversity of queer experiences and identities should be championed and acknowledged both in fiction and in reality, not turned into a monolith. Our solidarity amongst our individual queer differences and identities is our truest version of strength and authenticity. We are not all exactly the same, and that’s a good thing. When care is taken to specifically convey that in fiction, it is worth not only acknowledgement but also defense.

So: do we or do we not care about why representation is important, and why these sorts of conversations should exist at all? About censorship of queer storylines, and diversity in the queer community, and solidarity in differences? About bisexual men, a vastly underrepresented group in fiction, and the specific censorship that affected Dean’s bi story accordingly? And about how these viewpoints people can place onto fiction through fandom-wide conversation–like implying Dean is ~queerer~ if you say he’s gay, or that you’re somehow sticking it to the CW and “straight culture” if you suggest he’s gay–can influence biphobia that translates into ways people see bi people in real life?

In other situations even in this fandom, people understand the value of diverse queer experiences. No one would dare to say that “you can argue Charlie is bisexual in canon because as long as you say she’s queer it’s fine.” Charlie is a lesbian. It’s very, very clear, and she shows and states that she is only attracted to women. Dean’s attraction to women in canon is equally clear, and is part of his bisexuality. Why is erasing that defendable?

Look: it is people’s God-given right to write whatever fic they want about “what if” variations of Dean’s sexuality through a different lens. It is not their God-given right to make things up about canon and call it analysis.

It is a universal truth that fandom is always going to take canon and mold it into other versions that they love, for their own personal reasons and in ways that have value to them. That’s why transformative works like fic exist, and it’s why fandom is awesome, and I’m glad people use aspects of their favorite stories to tell other inspired stories that are of personal significance to them. But the word transformative is used for a reason: it’s an alteration of canon. It’s not a bad thing or a personal attack on people to say that.

There is a difference between understanding canon and writing actual meta / analysis of the show, and writing AUs for ones own enjoyment and fulfillment. (This is true on AO3 or on Tumblr/Twitter. I often see posts that are positioned as “meta,” but again, are just cherry-picked weirdness.) These differences are important, as is understanding how headcanons and fic affect surrounding conversations and fandom perceptions. And this fandom seems to have a very big problem with understanding the difference between these things, while taking it extremely personally in a negative way when people try to explain why the difference matters.

Confusing analysis and transformative fandom does a disservice to both, and denying the value in the former is not only a form of anti-intellectualism but also removes some of the beauty in the latter. If we can’t distinguish and differentiate between canon and headcanon, we can’t discuss the value in understanding the canon, nor adequately discuss the artistic value and power in creating derivative variations from it in personal ways. Both are different, both are equal, both are vital, and insisting the distinction is needless hampers conversation across every space. And nowhere is that more true than when one is discussing queer representation and queer censorship, like in the case of Supernatural. Again, why are we here? Why do we care? You cannot argue for and discuss the problems of censorship sufficiently if you don’t understand what was censored–and in Dean’s case, that was his love for Cas and his bisexuality.

I leave you with this (probably unneeded) analogy:

Imagine Dean’s a zebra.

(Sorry, EDS community; not that kind of zebra.)

People are trying to say “Dean is a black and white hoofed mammal <3″ and well, that’s accurate, but that doesn’t mean him being a zebra isn’t its own unique thing. A whole bunch of people are looking at him though and saying “well I prefer to say that Dean’s a black and white horse,” because they like that viewpoint better. Close enough, right? A black and white horse is basically a zebra, right? And then there’s the people who are like “I think Dean’s a cow!” and it’s like, okay, no idea where you came from, but whatever.

The point is that those are all entirely different fucking things. They’re different animals. Someone wanting Dean to be a black and white horse doesn’t make him less of a zebra. Pretending otherwise is absolute nonsense.

This debate/discussion/discourse is equally nonsensical. That is the logic (or illogic) that applies here.

Just because Dean is “queer” doesn’t mean any queer categorization underneath that umbrella suddenly equally applies.

Dean is bisexual. And he is “queer” because he’s bisexual.

Those are the facts.

And for the love of God, please... I really don’t think I’m an asshole for saying it.

So, to whoever made it this far: please do me the courtesy of not hating me for it or trying to bait me into a fight.

I’m tired. Thanks.

----

EDIT: Couple of good additions!

• @doctorprofessorsong added some good details about how some of these harmful biphobic concepts translate to real life, and real things that bi people struggle with.

• A lesbian anonymously sent in her perspective as someone who enjoys gay Dean headcanons/fic and agrees with this post, and agrees that the fact that Dean is bi in canon is important.

#dean winchester #supernatural #dean is bi #bisexual dean winchester #HAHA I TOLD MYSELF I WASN'T GOING TO PUT THIS IN THE OFFICIAL TAGS BUT THEN I SPENT HOURS WRITING IT SO FUCK IT #[slaps target on my back and cries] haha here we go #I'm not linking it on twitter though. I don't have that level of masochism in me. maybe this will fly under the radar on here a bit?#spn meta #I take a marijuana level of high road on twitter constantly but fun fact I'm not immune to knowing people hate me for daring to say this #doesn't change the facts though! and unfortunately I do actually give a fuck! even if few others do #maybe this is so long no one will read it #char writes things #also I did absolutely plagiarize myself in parts of this. what about it. ok I'm done goodbye.... screams #PS people CAN reblog this btw. I am being a little baby wincing at potential backlash preemptively but like #I wouldn't have posted it and left reblogs on if I didn't know and accept the risks <3 I will speak the truth idc idc someone's gotta do it #EDIT: I stopped being a coward and posted it on twitter :) because fuck it! I stand by my words etc etc it's all fine #me vs adding to the tags as if anyone's reading them lmfao

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vampish-glamour · 4 years ago

Note

(1/2) You ever think how "I'm so gay" is just a way of saying "hot"? Where a straight person would say something like "I want to motorboat her tits" or "I've never wanted to suck a dick so bad", tumblr gays will go "not to be GAY... but o,,,,h m y. G o D ! ! hngnngngnggn jesus chRISt". With lesbians this is seems especially bad. Ime (I'm a lesbian myself) it's rare to see a lesbian openly express her attraction without these weird contortions even outside of tumblr.

"so gay" anon (2/2) I wonder how much of it has to do with demonization of sexuality both male and female (you don't want to sound like an icky STRAIGHT MAN, the horror! vs women in general being judged for expressing attraction vs lesbians in particular struggling against the sexsless "uwu soft gorls flower crowns" stereotype), and how much of it has to do with wanting to signal an in-group and a stereotypically female need to make it like a communal experience (tumblr being mostly afab).

Oh, absolutely.

(Future me coming back here after I wrote my response. Buckle up, I have Thoughts.)

You’re right on the money here, especially since it’s something I’ve experienced myself.

There’s so much demonization and weird expectations around sexuality. Including but not limited to;

Demonizing people who express sexual attraction to women, viewing them as “predatory”

The experience lesbians specifically often have with feeling alienated from their straight girl peers (not being able to do typical platonic things found in female friend circles like hugging, braiding hair, holding hands, etc. Without fearing being seen as predatory)

Thinking all straight men are just straight up rapists

Seeing sexual attraction as icky and impure, and favouring romanticized “she has such pretty hair”, “I want to kiss her cheek”, “I want to hold her hand in a flower field”, etc.

As far as the last point goes, you’re absolutely right that it happens mostly with wlw (especially lesbians though since unlike bi women we’re only attracted to women, so it’s our whole attraction that’s affected. And the word “lesbian” itself is often seen as inherently gross and predatory. Not saying this doesn’t affect bi women—because it does—just making the distinction).

Look through any wlw, sapphic, or lesbian tag on Tumblr. It’s likely to be filled with all these cutesy things that often infantilize same sex attraction to women. Calling women “girls”, talking about how “pretty” they are, talking about flowers a lot for some reason, and honestly the overall tone that’s used which is very “uwu innocent soft girl”. So eventually you get bombarded with things like “omg girls are so pretty, just look at how their hair twirls, I just wanna braid flowers into it, I’m so gay”.

And everyone’s scared to go further than that and go into the gross sexual territory—because if anybody dares to express sexual attraction towards women? They’re evil and misogynistic and predatory. If you’re wlw and you’re doing it? Omg, you’re making women unsafe in locker rooms!! What, are you looking at them???

Sorry, this is sort of turning into a rant on how suppressed wlw sexuality is. Because it bothers me so much. And yes, I was 100% somebody who would say “omg not to be gay but”/“wow I’m gay”/“I’m having gay thoughts right now”/etc. In place of “wow, that lady is hot”. So it’s something that’s personal and close to home for me.

Point is, you’re so right and you should say it. Because this is such a common problem. I think it could also be a result of same sex attraction being so sexualized (in the case of men it’s usually to portray SGA as “icky, in the case of women it’s usually to make porn), and SGA people feeling the need to push back against that and say “no, look, we’re just as pure as you are!!”.

It’s a lot of things coming together and working against us. And now we have “I’m so gay” as a way to express attraction without having to deal with the negative repercussions of expressing attraction as a gay/bi person, especially a gay/bi woman.

Despite all this, I think that there genuinely is a problem with people throwing around “I’m so gay” without any of these things factoring in. Because I see people saying things like “I like iced coffee, I’m so gay haha” or “I’m so gay, I can’t even drive”. That I think is just a result of the word “gay” being watered down so much, so now it means “quirky” instead of “homosexual”.

But where it’s used in place of “wow that’s hot” or “holy shit she’s gorgeous”, or anything of the sort? Absolutely a result of the demonization around same sex attraction.

So to sum my thoughts up, because I think this is really important to talk about;

Sexual attraction is still seen as “impure”. This goes double for same sex sexual attraction.

Any sexual attraction to women is seen as predatory. Often due to homophobia, it’s seen as worse when it comes from wlw.

To escape being seen as gross and predatory, wlw (and honestly SGA people in general) have adopted a culture of purity, femininity, romanticism, and flowery prose to come off as anything but sexual.

This leads to language like “that’s so hot” being replaced with more acceptable alternatives like “I’m so gay”. This way the feelings of attraction can be communicated, but not explicitly because that would be Bad.

#asks #anon #y’know what I’m adding this to #glam’s angry lesbian hours #because yes this upsets me a lot.

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dialovers-translations · 4 years ago

Text

DIABOLIK LOVERS VERSUS SONG Bloody Night Vol.Ⅴ Mini Drama “Kou VS Yuma”

Original title: 録り下ろしミニドラマ｢コウVSユーマ｣

Source: Diabolik Lovers VERSUS SONG Bloody Night Vol.V Mini Drama

Audio: Here

Seiyuu: Kimura Ryouhei & Tatsuhisa Suzuki

Translator’s note: The other VERSUS mini drama tracks were between 20 & 25 minutes so when I opened the link and saw it was only 12 minutes, I immediately got worried that perhaps the track was incompletely. Fortunately, that was not the case and they just made this one shorter for some reason. I guess they ran out of ideas? :p It really does feel a little lackluster compared to say the Shuu VS Laito one where there was a lot of interesting tension between the two boys. Although the Mukami’s are on better terms with each other, so their dynamic is obviously different from default.

→ LIKE MY TRANSLATIONS? SUPPORT ME ON KO-FI!

You walk up to the Mukami manor.

Yuma: So ya finally came, huh? Just how long did ya stay behind at school?

You look around.

Yuma: Foolー I’m right over here.

You flinch, turning around.

Yuma: Come on...!

*Rustle rustle*

Yuma pins you down against the grass.

*Rustle*

Yuma: Heh...You really are hella slow.

You seem confused.

Yuma: Aah? ‘Why’, you ask? ーー This is more important right now. I’m thirsty...

He bites you.

*Sluuuurp*

Yuma: Haah...I really can’t get ‘nough of this...

You protest.

Yuma: Ugh, shut up! Ya should only focus on my fangs! More...Quench my thirst more...

*Sluuuurp*

*Rustle rustle*

Yuma: ーー Ugh!! Stop makin’ a damn ruckus! ...Oi, this side’s up next.

You start shaking.

Yuma: Pissin’ yer pants? Hehe...Guess that makes sense. I bet it’s scary ya can’t see what I’m doin’, huh? I’d love to mess ‘round with you a lil’...but I can’t hold back...

*Sluuuurp*

Yuma: Ah...Haah...Your blood is still of the best quality...It’s even more addictin’ than Sugar-chan...Have ya started feelin’ good, despite all those protests from earlier? Ya really are hopeless, aren’t ya? Hehehe...

You try and defend yourself.

Yuma: Hehe...Just give in to it completely (1). If ya do, I’m sure you’ll be able to feel even beーー

Kou: ...Aaah!! Yuma-kun’s having fun behind our backs!! (2)

Yuma: Why the fuck ya here, Kou!?

Kou walks up to them.

Kou: No fair, Yuma-kun! Trying to hog M-neko-chan all for yourself like that! Say, let me join in as well? You’ve already had plenty of fun, haven’t you?

Yuma: Che, we were just gettin’ to the good part so back off already!

Kou: Eeeh!? Aren’t you being kinda mean? M-neko-chan isn’t exclusively yours so I have the right to suck her blood as well!

*Rustle*

Kou: Besides~ I’m sure she’s yearning for my fangs as well, right? Hehehe~

He approaches you.

Kou: Isn’t that so, M-neko-chan?

You whimper in response.

Kou: Hmm~ I have no idea what you just said, but I can take that as an ‘okay’, right? Well, I would have done it even if you said ‘no’, of course~ Well then, without wasting any more time...

Yuma: Oi, wait!

Kou: Hm? ...What? You want to do it at the same time?

Yuma: Hell no! Get yer hands off what is mine!

Kou: Like I said, that’s not up to you to decide. M-neko-chan said she likes my fangs best, you know?

Yuma: Aaah!? No way in hell! ...Che, at least come up with a more decent lie.

Kou: It’s not a lie though~~

Yuma: ...!! Are ya makin’ fun of me!?

*Rustle*

Yuma: Oi, Sow! Do ya seriously prefer hiーー

You use this as an opportunity to try and get away from them.

*Rustle rustle*

Yuma: ...!? Che...! ...Come on, this’ll work, right?

Kou: ...Now’s our chance! M-neko-chan, we’re making a run for it!

Kou grabs your hand and dashes off with you.

Yuma: ...Ah! Oi, hold it...! ...Fuck! ...Wait, I said!!! Oi!!

Yuma chases after the two of you.

*TIMESKIP*

Kou: ...Haah, haah...Aaah~ I’m beat...! I didn’t think he’d be that persistent, did you? Hehe~

You gasp for air after running.

Kou: Ah...Are you okay? Your complexion is really pale...

You nod.

Kou: I see. Guess it’s fine then~

You blink in confusion.

Kou: Oh? Did you perhaps think I was actually worried about your health? Pfft~ No way! ...Although, I was just a tad bit worried Yuma-kun might have sucked a little too much, but of course, I’m only worried about your blood in that case.

You frown.

Kou: Haha~ Did that hurt? But...Mmh~ I’m really digging that expression.

*Rustle*

Kou: I’d love to see more...So don’t run away and let me have your blood? I’ll make sure to take my time to thoroughly savor you...

*Rustle*

Kou: I’ll start by latching onto this delicious-looking upper arm...~ ...Hm? I can’t take it off very well...

*Rustle rustle*

Kou: ...Ah, geezーー!!

*RIIIIIP*

Kou: ...Ah. It ripped. ...Oh well, your skin’s exposed now so this works, right?

*Rustle rustle*

Kou: ...Oh? Does it tickle? Then how about this...~?

*Smooch*

Kou: Fufufu~ You were so shocked earlier but in the end, you love it when I do all of these things to you, don’t you? ...Come on, show me the best expression you’ve got...”

Kou bites you.

Kou: Mmh...

*Sluuuurp*

Kou: Hah...Haah...Aah~ It’s so sweet, it feels like I’m melting...~ Also...It’s so soft, I can’t stop...Mmh...

*Sluuuurp*

Kou: Mmh...Nn...Huh? ‘No’? I honestly don’t think I can control myself right now. Also, if you make too much of a fuss, Yuma-kun will find us, you know? Are you okay with that?

You shake your head.

Kou: Right? So just accept me...No, maybe you actually want Yuma-kun to find us, don’t you?

You deny it.

Kou: Haha~ You don’t need to deny it so desperately. In that case, shall I call him over...~?

Yuma arrives to the scene.

Yuma: Haah, haah...What was that ‘bout me?

Kou: Huh? ...Yuma-kun, amazing! Perfect timing!

Yuma: Aahn? ...Anyway, ya sure had some nerve earlier, settin’ me up like thaーー

Kou: ーー Stop! Instead, come over here! I said you came at the right time, no?

Yuma: Che...What do ya want?

Yuma steps closer.

Kou: Come on, let’s show him...Your top-tier expression.

Kou bites you again.

Kou: Mmh...Nn...

*Sluuuurp*

Kou: Hah...

Yuma: Oi...Don’t tell me, ya showin’ off to me!?

Kou: ...Fufu~ Exactly! Mmh...

*Sluuuurp*

Kou: Ah...Hehe~ M-neko-chan is a next-level masochist after all...The second she realizes somebody is watching her...Haahn...

*Gulp*

Kou: ...Fufu~ See? She gets aroused like this~?

Yuma: Che...Fuck off.

Kou: M-neko-chan? Show Yuma-kun even more of those nice faces.

Yuma: ...Shit!! If that’s the game ya wanna play...Oi, Sow! Don’t ya dare give Kou all of yer attention!

*Rustle*

Yuma: I don’t feel satisfied ‘cause a certain someone got in the way before we were done...

Yuma bites you as well.

*Sluuuurp*

Kou: Hehehe~ Now’s that more like it! In that case, me too...Mmh...

They both suck your blood at the same time.

*Sluuuurp*

Yuma: ...Mmh...Nnhーー! Keep still! One extra person barely makes any difference, right?

Kou: Hehe, now don’t be getting the wrong idea, M-neko-chan. You are in no position to talk back to us. Isn’t it obvious we’ll have you tag along until we’re tired of this?

Yuma: Hehehe...Exactly.

You continue to protest.

Kou: Haha...I’m starting to get a little pissed off. I should probably seal those lips before they spout any more infuriating nonsense, huh?

Kou starts looking through his bag.

Kou: If I recall correctly, it should be in here...

*Rustle rustle*

Yuma: Haah? Whatcha gonna do with that handkerchief?

Kou: I’m gonna put it in her mouth? Just like this...~

*Rustle*

Kou: It’s a shame I won’t be able to hear those sweet noises you make, but it can’t be helped. This ensures I get to have your blood after all. Besides, it looks so erotic, I’m kind of digging it! I can’t make up my mind where I should bite you next~ Hehe~ It’s a great opportunity...So how about the lower back? M-neko-chan...I’ll thrust them right in, okay?

Kou bites you again.

Kou: Mmh...

*Sluuuurp*

Kou: Nn...Mmh...

*Sluuuurp*

*Gulp*

Kou: Ah...Haah...

Yuma: Hehe...Ya better not forget that Kou isn’t the only one here, ‘kay?

Yuma bites you once more as well.

*Sluuuurp*

Kou: Mm...Come on! You can’t just focus on Yuma-kun! Look my way too!

*Rustle*

Kou: Okay? ...Take a good look. I’m going to give you an intense pain right now. I’ll make it so you can never forget about me again...

*Sluuuurp*

*Gulp*

Kou: Haahn...

*Sluuuurp*

Yuma: Seems like yer mind has gone blank. But...We’re not done yet. I’ll wake ya up again and again with these fangs...So brace yerself.

Kou: Fufu~ Remember this well. You can no longer escape from us Vampires’ fangs. Not ever, okay?

ーー THE END ーー

Translation notes

(1) Literally he tells her ‘to drop as far down as possible’. The Japanese word for ‘to fall’ is also used as a synonym for ‘to become tainted/corrupted’ at times.

(2) 抜け駆け or ‘nuke-gake’ literally means that you get a headstart on someone.

#diabolik lovers #dialovers #kou mukami #yuma mukami #diabolik lovers translation #diabolik lovers drama cd #drama cd #diabolik lovers versus song

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dxmichelle · 3 years ago

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Writing Tag Game

I was tagged by my dear lovely @kaibacorpintern!

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 16!

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 741,948! The majority of that is from Of Lost Swords and Shadow Magic.

3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? Of Lost Swords and Shadow Magic: the ygo/hp crossover origin fic for my Wayward Wizardry series.

Murder Most Foul: the ygo murder mystery game fic. The silliest bit of writing I've probably ever done, spawned by late night joke sessions with @kaibacorpintern.

The Hogwarts Slice of Life: little random one-shots that fit in OLSSM's universe.

Nerdshipping Shenanigans: little random one-shots/mini-ficlets that fit in OLSSM's universe, but are all Seto/Hermione, my otp. ❤️

Lost and Found: my abandoned Person of Interest fic.

Bonus #6: Maiden with Eyes of Blue: a Seto Kaiba birthday fic that explores the tense relationship between himself and Pegasus.

4. Do you respond to comments, why or why not? I've since fallen off replying to comments, which is sad because I was fairly decent at it. I still do occasionally and I'm sure I will pick it up again someday.

In the meantime, whether I respond to them or not, know that I read and cherish every one of them.

5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? Oh...probably Guilt. It takes place right after Atem leaves and Yugi has many feelings.

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending? Probably Let it Snow, the ultra-sugary Christmas Fic I wrote on a whim during an OLSSM hiatus.

7. Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written? I live in the ygo/hp crossover corner of the fandoms. But the craziest one I've ever written has to be Sapphire Road, because it's not only ygo/hp, but a Wizard of Oz/Return to Oz fusion. And it's Nerdship.

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic? Not necessarily hate but I have gotten some rather...interesting comments over on FF.net. There's one guest user that keeps trying to predict when I'm going to kill off Seto, and another that kept wanting me to write nonsensical ships into OLSSM.

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind? Hard no.

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I know of. Hopefully not!

11. Have you ever had a fic translated? Nope!

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before? I've co-authored jokes for a fic! Does that count?

13. What’s your all-time favorite ship? My Nerdship babies!! Seto and Hermione take up a nice roomy residence in my brain 24/7, and since I've essentially created said ship, it's a lot of fun to explore how it comes together and what the future for them would look like beyond each of their canon series.

Otherwise, I am more of a platonic shipper vs romantic in the yugioh fandom, and I have soft spots for both pride, rival, trust and peach ship!

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? I really don't want to have any unfinished fic, but i know in my heart that my Person of Interest fic will never be finished.

I've also been out of sorts with Ghost in the Machine as of late, and while it's on a temporary hiatus right now so I can work on OLSSM and Murder Most Foul, I'm sure I will return to it sooner rather than later.

15. What are your writing strengths? Plotting and characterization. While I am not-so-good at sticking to my outlines, most of my fics are elaborately plot-heavy, and it is very important to me that the characters sound and act as you would normally expect them to.

Another strength is just...going. If I'm sitting down to write and the words are flowing, I can get a ton down on the page in one sitting, and it's helped break me out of funks before.

16. What are your writing weaknesses? Sticking to outlines, haha! But mostly being more of a descriptive writer. Sometimes I can tend to be very dialogue heavy, and while that's not terribly a bad thing, being more prose-y is something I am trying to work on.

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? I've never done it myself, but wouldn't be against it.

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for? ygo/hp. Surprise, surprise. Back in 2005! It was the junky, plotless version of OLSSM, and the true, original Nerdship story. It's still online in the depths of FF.net if you choose to seek out terrible writing, and follows almost every rule in the "you know you were on FF.net in 2009 if you did this..." post.

19. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written? How dare you make me play favorites among my children! Probably OLSSM only because it's such a journey for me to take something that was absolutely terrible and completely redo it! It was my first child returning to the YGO fandom after years apart and has been such a labor of love to develop. And it's the longest story I've ever tackled, and my first real attempt at ship writing. :D

And cuz I love me my crossover fics.

But Murder Most Foul is a close runner up only because unlike everything else I've written, it is not a serious fic. It's meant to be silly, and that in itself creates a new challenge to keep it lighthearted, but keep the characters intact.

Tagging @bellamy-taft, @darksidechick823, and @lafeae!

#michelle replies #ask meme #tag meme technically but whatever #fic writing is hard #thanks for the tag!!!

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anxiety-trademark · 4 years ago

Text

The week in review:

Raw 09/21 NXT 09/23 NXT UK 09/24 Smackdown 09/25 Clash of Champions 09/27 + Main Event 09/24

Raw:

Billie’s not wrong. None of these people are wrong. That title has fallen so fucking far since Becky held it, Jesus.

Interesting to see Billie Kay be somewhat (?) supportive of Peyton. Manager?

I implore women to stop using red eyeliner unless you’re trying to look possessed.

Oh at least Mickie’s gonna have her last match with her snazzy pants on.

God that theme music is so outdated.

If there was one person on the roster that could convince me they wrestled in the Diva’s era, it’d be Mickie James.

Beautiful Octopus, dare I say best in the division. Look at those crossed legs. Just beautiful, Zelina.

Man it was cool watching Zelina reverse the powerbomb attempt into a rollup, but Mickie couldn’t be bothered to get her shoulders down for a 2 count before the reversal. Shame.

Zelina needs an increase to her speed to pull off the style she’s going for, but it’s a fun style.

oof I think Mickie actually caught Zelina’s forehead with that high kick.

Seated Senton off the top rope is garbage and I hate it.

Lmfao Zelina won with a backstabber. She’s literally Sasha-lite. Okay.

Word was Bianca was the star of the pc combine, right? So if you wanna showcase her strength, do it against someone I fucking know lmao. Who was this bro? Of course she’s stronger than a nobody in the pc. Friggin Alexa Bliss can effortlessly give piggy back rides to Sheamus. That’s impressive, because I know how strong and big he is. This could’ve been done better is all I’m saying. Maybe do a sitdown interview with her pc peeps hyping her up, or show footage of her blowing everyone in the combine out the park. Idk.

Ruby stop hyping up Nia and Shayna individually, individually they suck lol lesbireal.

So did Ruby just give Liv her shirt? …You know what, it works, I’m not gonna dig into this.

I feel like all women use the same starting moves against Nia and it’s a little tired ngl. They do this headscissors into a standing crucifix hold, and then slide down to try and roll her up. Then she picks them up and headbutts them. Come on peeps.

Mk just throw Lana through another table, she’s as useless in the ring (kf wise) as Liv is on commentary (non-kf wise)

Let me rewind, how did Nattie get taken out this time? A punch again. COOL. Nattie confirmed worst tag partner in the history of the division.

Lmfao rip Lana. Bye.

Wow we just said fuck entrances huh? Ugh God. Imagine Becky not getting an entrance as a damn champion.

So Peyton forgoes jumping for the German suplex, which could’ve resulted in her landing on Asuka’s head, and her reaction is to laugh. Consummate professional. Becky Lynch’s optic cranial nerve injury (caused by a failed German suplex) called, it can’t seem to find the humor.

Idk what that double underhooked move was by Peyton, but it was nice.

What bothers me about Peyton’s spinning heel kick, is as high as she gets it, she only hits people with her calf. Awkward to see.

That attempted transition into the Asuka Lock was... something.

Highlight: Lana going through the table

---

NXT:

Did Tegan say “why me” to Candice fucking her knee up with a metal pipe? Somebody get this girl some tissues.

Haha watching Tegan writhe in pain is funny. Candice gets points. And I do not like giving Candice points.

Really appreciate Rhea’s theme after hearing so much generic garbage lately. She’s so done with nxt as a performer, she has passed literally all of them by.

Not to be that person, but seeing so many people in the ring together bothers me. If one person was sick, literally all of them are sick now. It’s just kinda yikes.

Did they forego having a crowd? If so, wise. There’s enough ppl in the ring and at ringside.

Rhea fucking yeeted that girl into the barrier lmaooo.

“...Marina Shafir who’s done some great things on Raw Underground recently,” lmao sure.

The absolute half-assed attempt by that girl to pull herself up before Rhea booted her down to the floor was questionable.

So adding all these random peeps from the pc to this battle royal was done solely to have Raquel and Rhea flex for their feud in 4 months, huh.

Kacy does cool shit, wbk lmao. Gets kicked out, lands on her back, rolls into a handstand, rotates, pulls herself up into the ring using her feet on the ropes; gets kicked out, lands on the side of the guardrail, pulls herself up, uses the plexiglass to help balance herself, jumps onto the stairs; gets kicked out, lands on the side of the guardrail, stands on Kayden’s shoulders and gets chauffeured back to the ring. Brilliant. Would be overkill in a Royal Rumble, but it works here.

R&R eliminate each other/themselves together. Fitting. Dakota “help me I’m useless on my own” Kai is shook.

Why is Indi in the top 5? Or top 7? How is this girl so damn prestigious??

Kacy really just slung herself around the ringpost. I’m becoming a fan of her antics/performances in multiwomen matches.

I see Shotzi’s character is, “I come so close yet cannot manage to touch the gold.” I feel for her... cuz I can’t stand Candice.

Boooo

I love how Io carries herself. She’s a shining example of not allowing her heritage to hold her back or make her feel unimportant. She responds in Japanese, and without missing a beat, translates in perfectly spoken and quick English. Never dances, never smiles, never looks like a chump. Serious and answers the damn question. She gets points.

Highlight: Kacy shenanigans

---

NXT UK:

Lol I love KLR so much. Just ducks out of the ring the first time she’s bested.

“KLR is well versed in mental manipulation,” that she is. She’s honestly a top competitor in that sense; equal to the likes of Sasha and Charlotte when it comes to psychology.

Piper’s got power. Ragdolling KLR here.

That’s right, performing with Charlotte Flair at wm is an accolade one can only hope to achieve (I’m annoying I know) no but seriously, KLR vs Becky Lynch? Take my money.

Nice Superkick, nice Tornado ddt.

Dear ref, stop yelling at her and restart the count. Dweeb.

Lmao self inflicted wreckage of her knee.

This ref is a walking headache. We’re now getting into the autumn of overbooked women’s matches. And UK’s first title match back. Yikes.

That senton was awkward and looked painful af for KLR’s neck. If you’re gonna risk that move while selling a leg injury, make sure you have more space to correct your landing.

I almost wish that turnbuckle came undone naturally because KLR is already such a good seller, but I’m gonna assume this is a worked move since it’s been left exposed.

Yeah see there are issues with that spot. Positives: KLR didn’t purposefully undo the turnbuckle, so it’s not on her to give another title match; the spot has potential, as I’m guessing that would be genuinely painful. Negatives: Piper is too big of a woman to hit the lower turnbuckle doing the cannonball, so she ended up hitting the middle... which was padded. Good ending on paper if you don’t do the equations, but poor execution. Not Piper nor KLR’s fault though.

Slow pacing and I hate overbooked garbage, but this obviously isn’t the only match they’re having so *shrug*

Highlight: Clean tornado ddt, and I do love KLR’s selling

---

Smackdown:

Lol Bayley has her chair. She automatically gets a point every time I see it.

Top of the ramp this time? Okay, sure.

Stop cutting to the fancams, production. I don’t care about their reactions.

A fine enough promo to move along both of her angles, but production sucks. Wbk though.

“...one of the most complex personalities,” which personality of Alexa’s are we referring to, though?

Their timing on her pyro was off and now I’m sad. The pops during the breakdown leading into the fountains are fucking amazing and honestly cannot be topped by any of the other women.

When did Alexa stop wearing her gloves to the ring? Probably when she turned face. Shame.

She just called Lacey bitter, southern tea, and you know what? What a fucking drag. Imagine bitter southern tea. As someone who was raised in the south, that is a disgrace to southern tea. Sweet sun tea or pass.

Look at Alexa: selling Lacey’s strength, full of agile speed, and yet here’s Lacey not even bothering to put her shoulders down for her pin attempt. SAD.

A problem I consistently have with SD in particular is how they set up commercial breaks. They always do something dramatic, cut to commercial, come back and shit’s always completely different. How you gonna cut from Alexa leading and hearing the Fiend’s laugh, to return to Lacey in charge ???

Dear Cole, why are you calling her Alexis lol. Like I know that’s her real name but, hello??

oof Alexa’s midsection is beet red.

Lacey has not been putting on a “clinic” stop tossing that term around, Cole. Good bump by Alexa though.

Love how Lacey doesn’t mind landing flat when her moonsault misses. Respect. Her and Charlotte both eat that so perfectly.

LOVE how the monitors of people turned into Fiend’s face. POINTS.

It’s like she’s reverted back to her heel persona. This is literally 2016 Bliss, right? Right??

Roman is a large, strong, intimidating guy... but holy shit the visual of 5′1 Alexa staring daggers into the back of his head is intense af. I almost complained that he cut off her exit, but well done with the continuity.

Highlight: I’m really digging the Alexa/Fiend story

---

Clash of Champions:

Loving the red roots, hate the eyeshadow.

See, if Asuka wants to fuck around in the ring, you won’t hear me complain. I just wish she took her non-wrestling segments more seriously.

The patience Asuka gave Zelina to set up the arm kick was dumb.

“A hard arm bar by Asuka,” he says, even though her legs were completely bent. Easy on the credit given plz.

Zelina telegraphs too much. None of the bumps she takes ever catch me by surprise.

In the spirit of being fair, put your fucking shoulders down and let her attempt a pinfall, Asuka.

Haha Sasha-lite did meteora in the corner.

Nice roll into a kick, half point for Zelina.

No you don’t get to sell frustration or disbelief yet, that’s not buyable.

I don’t know wtf Zelina was going for with that counter before the Asuka Lock, but honestly idc. Could’ve been a kickoff match indeed. State of Becky’s title btw.

Every week it’s the same shit with Asuka. She gets on the mic, speaks Japanese, barely accomplishes anything, then gets interrupted/slapped/attacked... with dancing and smiling inbetween. I really wish she was more like Io.

Nikki isn’t “medically cleared to compete”, and the tag team titles aren’t being defended. My memory is fuzzy but wasn’t there some covid concerns going around back then? Was that just baseless speculation?

Love that Bayley turned this into an opportunity to be a bigger douche than she already was lol.

IS SHE DOING A VICTORY LAP LMAO

I want to hate this from a smarky “give other women a chance” perspective, but Bayley is an ass and this is great for Asuka to build credit as a face, and after being made to look foolish yet again. Lesgo.

Lol sounded like Bayley said, “you think you can cuck me?” I’m sure she didn’t. I’m choosing to believe she did though.

I never know exactly who to blame when Asuka’s Codebreaker looks ugly, but I swear Charlotte is the only one it looks impactful with. Sell job isn’t the problem, but taking that actual move is always dicey af.

Great kick by Asuka. Rekt.

Bayley says nah fuck this rofl. Fair ending; a fun little sprint of meaningless jabs.

“Chairwoman of SD” I like that too, Graves. Points to you.

LMAOOO Bayley set that shit up perfectly kekekek what’s up Sasha.

She be looking fucking incredible, but that neckbrace is a mega bummer.

Character wise, I’m surprised Bayley’s choosing to dole out punishment rather than taking her title and bolting.

Welp maybe she should have, Sasha going to town lmao.

oof peep that red line going down Bayley’s arm. eesh. Welts all over her back.

Highlight: Sasha beating the shit out of Bayley with a kendo stick

---

*BONUS*

Main Event:

You don’t pan the camera over to fucking commentary during Bianca’s entrance. Do better @ production.

Ruby puts her confidence in Liv even though everybody knows Bianca is winning this match lmao.

LOVE Liv’s boots.

like 20 seconds into the match and it’s already 10x better than the Bianca vs Billie Kay one. Don’t even waste a spot on Main Event for Billie Kay. No, I’m not not sorry for saying that.

It’s not that I hold issue with Bianca’s showboating or mannerisms, but it’s all so much more fitting for a heel.

Beautiful stalling suplex, but Liv is rather small.

Beautiful distance on that dropkick to Liv. Liv gets points for throwing herself so far.

We have enough women who rip their shirts off deep into matches, me thinks. Don’t need it from Liv as well.

Momentum could’ve been split better, but that was a decent match.

---

*Clash of Champions would be my highlighted event mostly thanks to Bayley, but if that’s a cop out, I’ll give a slight nod to Smackdown’s handling of Alexa.

#wwe #issa review #feel free to ignore these #cuz who tf cares lesbihonest #today's props goes to:#bayley

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gothamstreetcat · 4 years ago

Note

If you have time and want to, I’d love to see what you’d say are your creations to come from the Unofficial Batcat Fam. So, basically, ✨ + Itzel, Kayleigh, you, and Sophie’s stuff. (People changed their URLs and I’m on mobile so I’m not typing them out in fear of messing up the URLs. YOU’RE AMAZING AND CRAZY TALENTED AND SO KIND AND I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST DAYS AHEAD!)

girl don’t ask me why it took me so long to respond... i’ve been feeling nostalgic and i miss you guys a bunch. i love you all so much and i think each of you is extremely talented. i’m very blessed to be part of our little batfam

Itzel ✨ @brvceselina

desrest itzel, (i scrolled through all your edits by the way) as much as i’d like to scream again over this edit, i’d like to bring particular attention to your let selina kyle be this happy challenge (petition to make this my new header? I think so) and your because you matter to me edit. first off, i really admire how naturally stunning your gifs always look and i think it’s a real shame i feel you don’t get the credit you deserve. i mean really, your gifs look very natural and yet in so many of them selina is truly glowing. i also really admire all the fonts you use because they are really delicate looking and pretty. i wish i looked as gorgeous and happy as selina in your ‘be happy challenge’ but also i really want that sweater. maybe in black, though? the blue is so striking against selina’s smile and cheeks! i just love her. for your ‘because you matter to me’ edit i really love the quote you choose. it tears be apart because selina really does deserve those things and by god bruce is probably the only person to hold her without selfishness. i could stare at this gifset for hours and i think you really can see the relief in selina’s face and you captured it so well. this set is just so perfect in every way because bruce is all these things and more. catch me writing a fic, i dare ya.

Kayleigh 💜 @marthaskane

girl, you know i think the internet is beyond blessed to have your unique sense of style. i really like both your heroes vs villains sets. your torchwood set is to die for. this selina set is so freaking fierce you could cut the competition with that blue coloring it is gorgeous. it’s really so very hard to pick one but i think i really wanna highlight your batparents x batcat set for a minute. I think i could actually scream about this for hours if i had my mead on straight. can i just say, you mind? you really are perfect for putting this together and consistency aside, i just love it. pennyworth had to have know what they were doing to us giving us the parallel between thomas and martha--and golly there are a lot. it makes you wonder if in some small way, bruce and selina are to suffer the same fate as them. i mean, it’s gotta be some kind of fate that they’ve both been in that same position over the one they love (although, as i’m writing this stupidly i realize that i’m sure thomas getting shot is somehow to be a reflection of his and martha’s murder--but still. but, could you imagine martha being with him at the hospital and them having to pretend to be married--bickering when the doctor walks in and says they seem like an old married couple and martha is like haha, unless... i wish there was more i could say but i really think this set speaks for itself. p.s i have a lot of your old sets in my drafts so hopefully they get some good tags along the way ;)

Sophie 💕 @clara-oswin-oswald

sophie, you know i think all your doctor who edits are top. fucking. tier. but if i had to pick a favorite i think it would be this purple one (it is really just so pretty). i also really love the coloring you did for this edit (it might just be my fav)--like, if i could be green with envy, that’s exactly the shade of green i’d like to be. really in love with your coloring on this set and this set. of course, your dc edits are also awesome and even if purple is not your color you really use it well! this was such a lovely color pallete as well. yeah, i miss your gifs and i just think you’re super talented

Emily ♥️ @apple-grass-and-smiles

you didn’t think i’d skip you did i? first off, big shout out to your fic a death by a thousands cuts would be easier because you mentioned everyone in our little batfam, so it deserves an honorable mention. also, feels like i’ve been listening to this song a lot lately so... however, the fic that really does it for me has to be shiny toy with a price. maybe i cheated a little by just looking at my tags for this one, but it really helps me know what i wanna say--AND WHAT I WANT TO SAY IS how perfect this fanfic is. I can’t help myself, can i just copy my tags here because--

#I love all the little details you have poured in the beginning talking about the flat/snacks#detail is literally what I live for #My FAVorite bit what when you described Bruce needing to realize he'd totally go off a cliff just because Selina was doing it too #which is such a good line (and I'd totally steal it if I could) simply because you talked about how Bruce needs rules and guidlines #based off of how he grew up #But Selina somehow causes him to be a little wild which he loves #he would fucking follow her anywhere and not question why #not only that. but going into your entire labeling conversation #I really think it digs deep down somewhere where Bruce only wants to show his love for Selina and Share her in some way with the world #he loves her and he's not ashamed to be with or around her on every level #and yes that scares the absolute shit out of her because no one has ever loved or seen her like Bruce #and it's funny because I think the two of them will always have this crazy idea of I'm not good enough #And I really respect Selina's 'why can't we just be us?' line because it's my favorite #also I LOVED the little details of Bruce betting Alfred's and Selina betting things Bruce has in his room #because he probably doesn't even know #and it's like. they spend christmas together and Selina panics and wraps whatever Bruce has in his room #and he opens the freaking box so happy and grateful not even realizing his father bought it for him years ago #and I love how he put her legs back over him #and how he didn't want to keep her a secret #and the 'I could be bleeding' line is so ironic considering she was bleeding right in front of him and he was the First to know #with her blood running wet and hot between his fingers but all that and it really shook him when Selina did what she did #Emily you are so talented and I hope you continue to write

so yeah... that’s my lazy contribution. but also, i wanna add how i’ve always loved that despite bruce and selina feeling like neither is good enough for the other, they are not ashamed to be together. or seen together. and i feel like it’s obvious how hard it is for bruce to fit in yet, with selina it feels like he doesn’t have to try to fit in or be someone he’s not. and i saw somewhere today how selina was telling bruce if he didn’t give her the knife “barbara would never see her as an equal” yet, with bruce she already is an equal, and she always was.

i think i should stop myself because i really don’t want to go overboard or bother anyone or hurt their feelings. i kinda wanna skip me but if i really have a fav we all know it’s my batcat x lover well... maybe my daytime edit too and love letter

#thank you for all your kind words dear #i hope i wrote enough for you guys #just know that i love you all and i think you all are so super talented #this has been in my drafts forever and i think i got burned out towards the end #plus dog is being a real challenge lately #asks: emily #creator compliments*#long post

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bbrandy2002 · 5 years ago

Text

Family Feud Pt. 2

Rhys vs Walker

A continuation of my Wacky Drabble prompt.

Warning: Profanity and sexual obsenities.

Only 769 words

Thank you @burnsoslow for prereading and making a wonderful suggestion and just being you!

Thanks @bobasheebaby and @sirbeepsalot for unknowingly inspiring Baslivia for this.

Steve: Welcome back to the Family Feud. Parents, just a warning, this show may not be ....hell, who am I kidding....it will not be appropriate for children. And so that everyone is aware, during the break, an embarrassed Bianca Walker left the stage to beat her daughters ass and neither will be returning back. Stepping into their places, are Olivia and a very insistent, Bastien. Madeleine is replacing him for the Rhys family.

Leo: This is my worst fucking nightmare. Regina, bite her if she looks at me.

Madeleine:(rolls eyes) Pfft...it wouldn't be her first time.

Drake: How the hell did I get stuck with Olivia?

Olivia: I'm the smartest person on this team compared to these other nimwits you have.

Bertrand: I beg your pardon.

Olivia: You heard me. Anybody that would marry Savannah Walker after she practically eye fucked every man in Texas, is a moron, and I have no use for you.......you are the weakest link in the chain Bertrand....goodbye!

Liam: (pounds the podium) I WANNA PLAY!!!!!

Steve: I agree with Liam...I think...and with Bianca leaving, Bastien, you are up.....your team has two strikes, so get ready Rhys family....name something a doctor might remove from a patient.

Bastien: (gulps nervously, then looks at Olivia) My....penis.

Olivia: (stunned) No one was supposed to know about that!

Bastien: I'm trying to win this game Liv, and I can't help it if I'm larger than most.

Steve: (Rips card up and throws the pieces to the floor) Everyone on this planet knows damn well that your penis is not an answer.

Bastien: (grabs Steve by the collar) Are you mocking me man?

Steve: (frightened) Of course not sir, show me, Bastien's penis...wait...what?

(Ding...55 points)

The Walker family celebrates winning the first round.

Steve: Un-freaking-believable!!

Drake: HaHa...We got Bas and his big dick now....You're going down Rhys family!

Liam: I WANNA PLAY!!!

Steve: I'm not gonna survive a second round of this........let's have Riley and Bertrand.

Riley and Bertrand walk to the main podium, a furious Riley refuses to shake his hand.

Steve: We asked 100 people....wait, producers....is this question for real?

Producer: Ironically, yes

Steve: It's your lucky day, Riley.....we asked 100 people, name something the Queen of Cordonia might say?

Bertrand buzzes first.

Bertrand: Your moms a ho

Riley: What the hell, Bertrand! I've never said that.

Bertrand: I saw it on a Vine once.

Riley: That was YOU!

Steve: In order to keep this game going, show me....Your mom's a ho...

(Your Moms a Ho....3 points)

Riley: WHAT????

Steve: Riley, name something....well, that you would say...

Riley starts to sweat and her lips quiver.

Riley: I would say.....oooohhhh..thats the spot Liam, don't you dare fucking stop!!

Regina: Oh...I share a wall with them, I know thats up there.

Steve: (rubs his temples) You're all going to hell.....show me....whatever she just said.

(That's the spot, don't fucking quit....50 pts)

Liam: I WANNA PLAY!!!!

Leo: Its like he's five again.

Steve: Riley are you playing or passing.

Riley: I'm afraid my husband might shit a gasket if I don't....we are playing.

Steve: We really need to work on keeping our language and comments within the PG13 realm.....so, Leo, you're next to answer.

Leo: Why'd you give me a warning Steve and no one else?

Madeleine: Seriously Leo?

Leo: I warned you Mad Cow...now bite her ass Regina.

Steve: No No...No one is biting anyone.

Madeleine: Its okay Steve, we were engaged once.....I know he's all bark and no bite.

Steve: Hold the phone...you two were engaged?

Leo: Yeah and get this, she was engaged to my brother too, all the while being our cousin.

Drake: Oh great incestuous ones, just answer the fucking question already. I've got cow shit to shovel.

Leo: (flips Drake off)

Steve: (shakes head) this game is a lost cause.... Leo, what is something your sister in law might say?

Leo: My crazy ass sister in law would say, Leo's cock is bigger than Liam's.

Riley: LEO!!!!! Liam, do something about him.

Liam: I WANNA PLAY!!!

Steve: Oh dear God! In light of Bastien's penis being up there, your answer would not surprise me now....is it up there?

(Leo's johnson is big....10 points)

Riley: No!!!! I would never say that.

Madeleine: And yet, there it is.

Riley: BITE HER NOW!!!

Regina bends down and bite's Madeleine on the hip, growling and tugging.

Madeleine: Someone get this decrepit hag off of me

Steve: I'm done! This game is over! I'm calling it now.

Liam: Oh no you fucking don't.

Liam tackles Steve Harvey to the ground, still screaming he wanted to play fast money.

Riley: Now he gets mad.

**Will Liam ever get to play? Find out when he, Drake and Maxwell guest star on Celebrity Jeopardy.

Drake: How'd that fucking goose find me here?

Tagging those who requested: @romanticatheart-posts @ao719 @texaskitten30

Drabblers: @emceesynonymroll @burnsoslow @jessiembruno @bobasheebaby @jovialyouthmusic @katedrakeohd @dcbbw @stopforamoment @theroyalromanceforever

#choices trr #choices trh #the royal heir #the royal romance #choices liam x mc #playchoices #olivia nevrakis #liam x mc #drake walker

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lou-the-switch · 4 years ago

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2, 3, 4, 6, 7, 14, 17, 19, 20

2. Favorite Ler? (Tag them if you dare~)

Ahhhh I can’t remember their tumblrrrr ughhh

3.Favorite Lee? (Tag them to call them out~)

ooohhh-

@someticklishname @giggly-boi @sadsappylee @trans-mess

4.Opinion on blindfolds/restraints? Why or why not?

not really for me, kinda freaks me out

6.How long do you estimate you could last before calling mercy?

Hmmm... depends on my emotion, on a good day, I could last forever.

7.Ever have tickle fantasies?

Not a whole lot, maybe a few here and there

14.Pinned on your back, or your stomach?

on my stomach, that’s all I have to say

17.Feathers or Paint Brushes?

As a ler, paintbrushes, as a lee, neither, not really feather nor brush ticklish

19. What’s your favorite way to be tickled? (As in provoked, teased into asking, etc.)

If I had to choose, maybe a tickly massage? I dunno if I answered the question right haha

20. Are you/Do you like Polite Lees or Bratty Lees? (Asking for tickles vs Pissing someone off for tickles)

As a ler, I enjoy both, because both are super adorable. If I had to choose, I’d say bratty.

As a lee? I’m neither, I attempt (and succeed) to stay calm, so they don’t even tickle me (but they do anyway)

Hope you enjoyed!

#lou answers #tickle asks

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warmbeebosoftbeebo · 5 years ago

Text

Truth or Dare? 1/3 probably

much of the details about him in this fic is from things b has said in interviews, on periscope, twitch, twitter... see if you can guess what is true vs details/things i made up. other things, like most of his friends being girls (at least as a kid and teen) i don't think he's ever stated outright but i consider so damn obvious as you learn about him eg the bullying, his best friend in 8th grade was a girl. hopefully, all the things i remember him saying he's actually said and i didn't dream it/imagine it haha. also i love this fic so fucking much if i may say so. one of my faves, to be a braggart. in this universe, he never got introduced to spence or ryan, hence no mentions of them or panic! and him going off to arizona for cosmetology

tag list @greatheromuffinpalace @paypoulterer1 @anyh0w @anobsessioncalled @panicsinning @queerbrendon @prettyoddfiction @iwriteficsnottragediesladies @uriellybrendon @pageoftheclouds @brendonuriesbubblyass @ier0-must-die @itriedallthenamesiwantedaretaken @xfoxtalynx @spacesams00 @satanspuppet-x @1-800-hallelujah @ryrostan @tacobelltylerr @urie-dreams [just message me to be added or taken off the tag list]

----

You're watching Aladdin with Brendon, after Alice in Wonderland but before Bambi because you don't want to wind up crying yet. He's totally like Flower and Bambi. Loves flowers, flirty and doe-eyed, for starters. He's an Aladdin too, and is singing along with you as you're cuddled up on your bed with him, him absentmindedly playing with, brushing your hair. He stopped styling it a while ago, but you love having your hair played with, scalp massaged, neck too, as much as he does... Even that has arousal spreading, tickling over you.

You don't have class tomorrow, but he has a cosmetology one in the morning. He's still excited about not having someone telling him to get to bed though, and you're too relaxed, and uh... you like how you feel around him too much, how simple things, touches kind of turn you on, to suggest he get to sleep or leave your room. Besides, your roommate went home for the weekend. And these blankets and pajamas are comfy. You wind up getting into A Whole New World though: dramatic actions and singing, batting lashes at each other, giggling, pretending the bed is a magic carpet like the dorks you two are...

You offer your lap for his head to get pets in once the song ends... You love touching his hair. Watching his lashes, eyes, lips in the television light. Hearing his breathing deepening, his sighs, a couple mmms when you stroke the nape of his neck, tug his hair, scritch his scalp. You've only known him a couple months, but... whoo boy. Too bad he's gayer than the day is long. And kind of has a boyfriend from his program, George. Well, a friend with benefits.

“Truth or dare, B?” you ask when the movie ends, but neither of you move.

“'M sleepy from all those pets, y/n, so for once, I'm going with truth.”

“Were you like this as a kid? Was it musicals and wanting to do cosmetology and stuff back then too? Like not being... being... different. From how boys were supposed to be.”

He chuckles. “Pretty much. Did skateboarding for years, and some soccer, but that was pretty much the extent of the manly shit. Well, the heavy metal too. And lots of people did pot. But mostly the kind of things people thought boys shouldn't do. Most of my friends were girls. Still are. Liked making people laugh, entertaining them. Gymnastics, dance; just messing around not pro. Did sets for the drama kids in high school. I fit in with some guys, mostly chill stoner or art types, guys who weren't straight, but not many. Sometimes I had to fake it to get by with guys, if it even worked. But mostly stuff like the dress up box.”

“What'd you dress up as?”

“Different musical roles, like Maria and Cosette, Jean Valjean. I remember being about five and wrapping curtains around myself like a dress and singing Sound of Music. Cheerleader with the miniskirt and all from my older sister Kara. Uh... pirate, cowboy, or cowgirl. Elvis, Carly Simon, Gwen. Wanted to sound like her so bad. Beyonce. David Bowie in Labyrinth, without a proper wig though. And a few of the personas he had different eras too. Jareth was mixed up in a crush on him. Like I wasn't sure how much I wanted to play that role versus liked David... At twelve, with Jessica Alba, that was a lot clearer. Make up too, some wigs. Lots of my mom's clothes. I'm sure you can tell on that last one.” He still wears women's jeans now. And hoodies, shirts, a couple pairs of sneakers...

“Oh, a weird flower boy version of Rambo,” he laughs. “Like the headband, but my mom's blouse and jeans, a bouquet of flowers, heels, dad's sunglasses... Still have a picture of that one. And we have lots of home movies of stuff. Me being a lounge singer with a feather boa and gold dress... seducing my mom. Oh, shit, can't believe I just admitted that aloud. Anyway, there was firefighter, seamstress, servant, scuba diver, vet... Vampire, fairy, witch. Playing a mom or sister in plays, like sometimes one of my sisters would be the dad, I'd be the mom, or we'd be three sisters. Or they'd be the mom and dad and I'd be their baby. I remember one where I was pregnant—pillow and doll baby, haha—and Kyla was the pirate doctor helping me deliver on the ship. Or the damsel in distress being rescued by them. Or kidnapped by them. Or we had to save our mom, the queen, from a dragon or evil king.”

They were imaginative too! You're picturing them, little Brendon in these outfits, roles. So cute, and silly, and did you say cute? He must've been adorable, playful and an entertainer back then, too. He's done an open mic a few times and sings and plays at parties with friends. You've seen him do it last Saturday, nervous but eager to sing and play guitar, or keyboard. He said that music was his favourite hobby, that he loves doing it, especially for people, but you had no idea how deep it went.

“Me in my sister's gymnastic leotard, but over my shorts because she didn't want it so close to my crotch.”

The crotch part makes you think of it: if he wears... uh, panties too? The thought makes you flush and feel embarrassed. You haven't seen him in a dress or skirt either, but he used to wear those. You wonder if he still does and you just haven't seen it. You think they'd suit him for some reason. The lavender hoodie, the pink sneakers, plus a miniskirt? Denim, or black. God, you bet that he'd look even better, draw you to him more.

“Wish we had dress up stuff to play with here, B. Bet it was fun. And I bet you looked so cute.”

He gets up, but it's to turn on the lamp; the tv had gone dark. He bats his lashes. “Oh, I did.”

You both laugh as you throw a pillow at him. “Goofball. Don't ever let me tell you you still look cute, then. And that I actually would want to see you with a dress up box.”

“Truth or dare?” he asks. You'd forgotten how this started.

“Truth?” Neither is a safe bet, so you just go with what he went with to even it out.

“Would you want to see me dressed up? Like... in things here... of yours?”

Your breath catches. Are you that obvious? You nod, asking “Truth or dare?”

He grins. “Whattaya think, y/n? Dare.”

“M-maybe... uh... a skirt? On you, I mean?”

“That can be arranged.” He practically bounces over to your closet, sorts through, deciding on a long soft blue and lilac hippieish flowery one that goes to your ankles, a purple plaid one that comes to your knees but would be two to three inches shorter on him, and your denim one that's so short it would be a mini on him. You wear it with black tights or other pants it's so short. Really, he picked most of them; you only have two others. He holds them out one by one, then places them over his hips: “Which one would fit me best?”

You get flustered, because you want to see the denim one most, but worry it would be too short for him. The plaid one? It gives “naughty schoolgirl” vibes to boys and men, older pervs included, so you don't wear it much, even though it reminds you of a newly formed coven of witches stuck at a Catholic school for some reason (you blame The Craft). You wonder what'd look like on him. You bet he's worn skirt school uniforms before, and that he'd get cheesy with it, calling you Miss and asking hammily but flirtatiously about extra credit, asking you to teach him, maybe bending over... which not going to lie, you do want if it got sexily funny, but you know it couldn't mean anything.

He grins. "Warning ya, my legs are really hairy, so you might wanna go with the longest one. What can I say, I've got Jewish legs."

You snort. "Guess I've got Jewish legs too: my hair is a light brown, but there's lots of it below my knees. I stopped shaving now that it's November." You can't help wondering if he's dressed up for Hallowe'en in a girl's costume, or in drag, and what he'd look like; even some guys who are kind of sexist and homophobic do that for Hallowe'en, so it wouldn't be out of the ordinary even outside of the gay bar you and he were let into a few times, because George knew the bouncer. Both of your first one, bar or gay bar.

"Oh, I bet I've got more than you," he jokes, and slides his pant leg up a bit, doing a "banananana" strip tease music thing, shaking his leg, making you both giggle.

"Go with the shortest one, B. Bet you'd look super sexy," you reply, hammily winking.

"No peeking!" he admonishes teasingly, hiding behind your closet door, but he pops his booty out and sways it before hiding again. His jeans quickly get flung towards you to him laughing, "Hey, you ever see that British film The Full Monty?"

"It's kinda tight on my ass, but loose on my hips. What can I say? I bring the booty. But your hips are more womanly than mine, alas," he sighs dramatically. “And your thighs are damn. Um. At least it covers my underwear. Pretty much.” He peeks out, excited. "Ready? I just wanna make sure you're prepared for my hairy ass legs, oh and my stunningly gorgeous ass."

"Pshaw, I know that that booty brings all the boys to your yard, you tramp." He's really a tease at that bar. Both guys his age and kind of older, but only one creep. He always drinks for free, gets you drinks too, and you alternately keep close and watch from afar and let him do his thing with said boys. He only talks with most, often dances, but if he likes the guy, the dancing goes beyond pg territory, kissing too, and he even went home with one of them.

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official-michael-afton · 6 years ago

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I agree with your thing about getting William antis and stans to chill. The real issue is that you can’t glorify him because he has done some REALLY horrible things, but it’s also annoying to me how people can make him a homophobic and racist simply because Sock Cawthorn hasn’t given him nearly enough chractization so people can be spouting off these headcanons and making saying you like the character as a ANTAGONIST (and not agreeing with any of his actions) a bad thing. Please, just chill guys

Sup fam it's 7 in the morning and I'm half asleep while typing this hoping that our REALLY shitty hotel WiFi will post this soooo *finger guns*

Tbh I just- my whole thing is like- some people REALLY like William Afton as a character. Some people REALLY love hating on William Afton. Both of these people exist, so like... Get Over It. Y'all can co-exist.

Yeah don't romanticize his actions but also... He's a fictional character so you're not romanticizing him just by liking him. Like one example of romanticizing I've seen is when I saw someone go "Well I think William is canonically a good father who was actually really nice to his kids, that's why Michael wants to find him!" Like... Noooo Michael shows clear malice in his voice when talking about his Dad and even shows some signs of abuse and neglect in his actions... Y'see, THATS romanticizing because you're trying to downplay his canonical character and trying to "prove" he's actually a good guy just cuz ya like him. What ISNT romanticizing is "Oh yeah smelly bastard, love him! I hc him as [insert-identity-or-trait-here]!" Because like- you can like a fictional character but still realize they're a piece of SHIT in canon. Same with AUs and RP blogs like- it's okay if you want a William who ISNT being horrible every waking moment of his life, because you're not trying to downplay who he CANONICALLY is.

It's kinda like Disney villains! We KNOW they're bad and never try to argue that, but we can still like them! We don't have to spend every waking moment of our lives going on and on about how much we hate their guts just to prove that we're #Unproblematic. High key this is the first fandom I've been in where even liking the villain puts you in the same category as the people who try to justify their canonical actions.

Just..

Some shite I've seen stans do: "Why is your William ugly do you hate William fans or something", "*Continually make sexual jokes on my blog despite me saying this is a PG13 blog*", "I think William was canonically a good person!", "*insist that William is hot despite people(coughvsemilycough) consistently asking people to stop sending those asks*", okay one time I found someone liking a lot of my posts tagged William and I went to their blog out of curiosity and found that they made... It was literally a yandere-like post. Swear to God they- not gonna put what it says here but it was straight out of a yandere character like wHY, "William's actions are justifiable because [literally any excuse]!"

Some shite I've seen antis do: "You're not allowed to hc William as anything other than a cishet white twink(even tho Will was canonically chubby) and if you do you're a racist/LGBTphobe/etc!!!", "If you aren't spending every waking moment of your life despising William Afton then you're a stan how dare you", "If you ship Willry and/or Purplephone I'm going to actually threaten you and encourage physical violence towards you.", "Oh, you like William Afton as a character? HEY EVERYONE ADD THIS USER TO YOUR BLOCKLIST LMAO", not really William related but I swear I've seen quite a few exlcusionist ideals in the anti community, also I've noticed a few "[character] is clearly [identity](even tho Sock Cotton never gave any characters canon confirmed identities) so if you're not drawing [character] as [identitiy] then fuck you!!!, I could make a whole post on why Fanon is dangerous but that's another day-, oh I've also been afraid that any time I'd post a William I'd either get anon hate or a callout post haha,,, Still afraid of that,,,

Shite I've seen them BOTH do with each other: "If you even LOOK at [insert-user-here] you're being added to our blocklist", being absolutely vicious in referring to each other and having no respect for people with different opinions, encouraging violence/pettiness... just being absolute SHIT role models like wtf aren't some of you supposed to be 20+ why are you picking such immature fights with teenagers, taking "I like/hate William" as a personal attack on themself, The poor "your fave is" blogs... The poor, poor "your fave is" blogs... I swear it's almost a comedic PATTERN to see "William Afton from fnaf is [insert-thing-here]" Anti:"UMMM ACTUALLY WILL IS A CHILD MURDERER TAKE THAT POST DOWN" Stan:"hAH FUCK YOU IM GONNA MAKE MY OWN POST WITH UR FLAG SINCE U DELETED IT UWUWUWUWU", Just... I've never seen a fandom be so vicious WITHIN the fandom- like I've seen those for Vs against a fandom but I've never seen such animosity IN the fandom itself, like... Seriously are you guys Okay

But yeah I rambled for a long time so enjoy this post of my frustrations towards my own community sbscahxmfb

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vertigoambrosia · 5 years ago

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wttf day 2, or ‘how many days will it take me to actually waatch this all the way through?’

god i’m so glad AJ is able to go full shitboi now that he’s over the crown

so wtf is schadenfreude supposed to be in wxw? how am i suppsoed to reconcile kyle being all supportive to lucky here and then on twitter straight up telling him to go fuck himself

gresham how dare u slap the boi

on the BUTT

this is kind of an odd choice for an opener, isn’t it? idk for some reason this feels kinda low key

but then again i’ve been zoning out all day so who knows

aww poor bb

i want my baby boy to be happy again

oh we getting a montage for the shotgun title?

wait

i don’t know shit about alexander dean so *shrug*

his hair + beard reminds me of marty

he has boring music

fuck him up robert

hahaha commentary confused by ‘tops off for avalanche’

YEAHHH GO FUCKING HAM AVALANCHE

oh eh they’re on the outside now

oh nvm they back in

now that’s what an avalanche match should be like!

oh here’s this shitty boy

god i love this turn so fucking much

and their feud two years ago owned bones

it’s great too cause like, who is rooting for jurn here? like, he’s been boring af for the most part in the crown trying to be all GRRR I’M SCARY AND BADASS

who is that one fucker booing david starr

i blame mike kilby

i think i already made that joke but still

well ahura’s not wearing a shirt so at least he won’t waste him during the match taking it off

lmaoooo his shoes

man i love david but i really want our stupid boys to win this

and ahura to finally get the pin and not fuck it up

*ahura voice* dude you can’t tag yet i’m not done with my striptease

omg it’s like ten minutes later and he is hellbent on ripping his pants off

AHAHAHAHAHA THE PANTS FUCKING FLEW INTHE AIR

yaaay!

awww kisses

will prince ahura become the dumbest tag champ ever?

uh oh it’s about to get sinister and sexy up in here...

oh fuck ivan

BABY

hey wait what!

i mean i love lucky getting one up on pete and ivan

but i was hyped up for a horny match

esp when they were really selling them as being fucking unhinged much better than yesterday

wait is the finals really going to be a fucking four way? UGH

anyway here’s some nice southern boys

anthony henry kinda looks like a fuckboi, but a loveable one

also he has def duckfaced for me taking a picture during his entrance twice and both times my dumbass phone blurred it up

aww tfw you wanna be hardcore but your legs betray you

i can’t remember which show the drake/riddle match andy mentioned was in, but i 200% recommend that match - i was there for it and it was fucking FIRE

I CAN’T EVEN DESCRIBE WHAT THE WORKEHORSEMENT JUST DID

:) drake deserves all the chants

oh really? burch and lorcan in the “final”? (i refuse to acknowledge a 4 way as a real final for a tournament)

here’s a 4 way because

oh apparently this is a #1 contender 4 way? ok, sure

oh this rust boy is...fit

lmaooo rico, re: the rotation “he’s such a nice kid; i hope he doesn’t die today”

haha rust taylor is not impressed

noo sirs don’t talk about femme fatales i haven’t watched it yet!

oh flamita vs avalanche is gonna be a thing

oh lord this match is just gonna be five different types of ridiculous

LMAO OH MY GOD

this is madness!

arrest these men!

*tas voice* PUT THAT SUPER SOAKER DOWN

tbh tho knowing how hot the turbinhalle can get, if that water is cold it

WHAT

what do i even say about this

*tas voice* you shot me with a gun you’re getting off easy with a fine

*tas voice*

“THAT’S OJ SIMPSON’S GLOVE” fuck

ohhh did jay have the cutting board and knife to cut up his zuchinni?

ok i can’t even keep up with this madness

oh my got we have an inset of zuchinni prep

ok commetary is on fire was well

FRANCIS

HERE TO RESSURECT HIS FATHER

THE SODA MATCHES THE ACCENTS ON HIS JACKET

orange soda is great, lbr

where did andy get a machine gun this isn’t america

what can i even say. what could i add to this.

99% sure i have been spoiled for this match but that’s ok

HA THEY ACTUALLY MADE THE TIM THATCHER FESTIVAL LOGO

am i buying another timo shirt?

here comes the g r a p p l e f u c k

blood??????

the return of the gyrating!

timo on the top rope???

goddammit bobby just die already

man the things tim does with his face

YEWSSSSSSS

aww alan called him a ‘pro wrestling angel’

good end

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neverwatchedonepiece · 6 years ago

Text

609-610: "Luffy Dies from Exposure?! The Spine Chilling Snow Woman Monet" and "Fists Collide! a Battle of the Two Vice Admirals!"

Surrounded by trash, unsure of location or direction. Too real, Luffy. Too real.

I feel like a broken record at the moment but Punk Hazard really is delivering.

Across 609 and 610, we had Law vs Vergo with a surprise interruption by Smoker. Caesar was the subject of unexpected character development. Even Luffy vs Monet had a twist, with Luffy falling into a trash compactor and meeting a tiny talking dragon.

I bet that’s Foxfire’s son. The little dragon had a kid’s voice.

I’m just glad the big dragon the Strawhats roasted wasn’t Momonosuke (@mrkashkiet, I am looking at you sternly. xD)

Law Just Cannot Quit Smoking

And does not want to.

The action picked up with Vergo hoofing it to the SAD Room. Speed lines ahoy!

Inside, Law slowly drew his sword in front of a vast tank of SAD Gas. Not sure what he was planning to do, but let’s not dwell on it, in case his plan was literally explosive.

Vergo appeared at the door. “I feel like my hand has been bitten by my own dog. This is too much even for a mischievous child. You were always too smart for your own good. People like you tend to die young.”

You know, I’m not keen on stoic villain types but I’ve got to admit that Vergo has some killer lines.

“It would be easiest to crush your heart but I won’t do that. I’ll torment you slowly as I please and warp your smart ass face with fear.”

Like I said, good lines.

He wailed on Law with grim purpose to the point I found myself shouting, “Come on, Law! ROOM YOURSELF OUT OF THERE!” Law was not having a fun time. (Dare I say, he was SAD?)

But his instinct for shit-talking was irrepressible. “Are you guys frustrated because your scheme is coming crashing down? Is this thing that important to you?”

Well, yeah... If Caesar is *the only person* who can make whatever it is that Doflamingo wants, then SAD must be profitable. Profits before pals seems to be Doflamingo’s modus operandi, but I don’t get the feeling Law is all that surprised Vergo is trying to kill him.

Law did fight back. There was an attempt. He tried to Room his heart back. But Vergo is fast and snatched Law’s heart from the air.

The worst thing, though? Vergo punched Law so hard he lost his hat. That is not cool. It must have riled Law enough for him to try his (awesome) Counter Shock attack. It was big, flashy and high voltage, but it only left Vergo lightly toasted.

Vergo must have decided to kill Law then because he said, “I have a message from Joker. He said, ‘What a shame.’”

Law was weirdly zen about the whole situation. “Oh, well. It didn’t work. I was pretty sure I could take my heart back from Caesar, but I didn’t expect you here, Vergo.”

The lack of -san honorific was the last straw for Vergo. He squeezed Law’s heart like a stress ball. Toei’s red filter descended. Soul-shredding pain was experienced. Law screamed a lot. As you would if your heart was being squeezed by a maniac.

Then, a shaft of light descended from the vaulted heavens.

Except not really because it was Smoker.

It’s almost the same thing.

Vergo was typically cool about the interruption. “I’m in the middle of something. Does it have to be now, Vice-Admiral Smoker?”

And I did a backflip. Yes. Excellent interruption. Great timing, Smoker! Now stop being so fixated on the Big Tanks That Go “Blort” and execute your glorious revenge!

Really, now I think about it, Vergo is almost as bad as Caesar. When Smoker called Vergo out on his deceit and told him not to tell the G5 Men as he was a father figure to them, Vergo said, “Don’t tell me you actually care about those guys? I’m a base commander. I can do whatever I want to my no-good subordinates.” Another one who treats other people as disposable pawns.

Unsurprisingly, Smoker and Vergo came to blows. Smoker seems to be having more luck than Law, but then Vergo does not have Smoker’s heart in a box. What I’d like to happen is Smoker retrieving Law’s heart and they tag-team Vergo into oblivion.

That sounded wrong. But you get what I mean.

Star Wars Episode IV: A New Rubbery Hope

How did Luffy end up in the Death Star’s trash compactor?

His battle with a bird woman from Hoth went south. Literally.

And I cannot believe I am about to say this, but I kind of wish Luffy’s fight with Monet was a little bit longer. Her powers are great. Her self-awareness and cunning are too.

She maintained those ten layer kamakura walls without breaking a sweat. When Luffy smashed one layer, she wrapped another around her frozen prison without missing a beat. Luffy knew she was stalling for time and said he’d just break every layer quicker than she could replace them.

“I bet,” she said. Then swept up behind Luffy and, in an oddly flirty manner, whispered in his ear, “I don’t think I’ll win if I fight you, but the strongest isn’t always the winner in a fight.”

Then she grabbed him and wrapped him, literally, in winter’s embrace.

That hypothermia power was quite cool (no pun intended). Paired with those desolate, snowy vistas and her eerily calm voice urging Luffy to let go, to sleep, relax and let it be, Monet’s Devil Fruit seems pretty strong to me.

But just as Luffy was about to pass out, Zoro’s voice - the very warning he yelled at Luffy a couple of episodes ago - cut through the darkness. “THIS IS JUST THE BEGINNING OF THE NEW WORLD!”

I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of the blue filtered haki moments. When he sprang up and let loose that Jet Spear attack, I cheered.

Then he fell through the floor into a garbage chute and I laughed.

It was cool, though. He’s rubber. He’d bounce. And sure enough, it wasn’t long before he was raking through broken gadgets for food. At which point a tiny dragon spoke to him and that is where the story ended.

I am now 75% sure that tiny dragon is Momonosuke. It had a kid’s voice. Probably should be a higher percentage than that but I like to hedge my bets, haha.

Chopper Looks Like Every Harried Substitute Teacher Ever

While Luffy was readjusting to life in a trash compactor with a small talking dragon, Monet flapped away to tick off another box on the never ending to do list: securing the Addicted Experiment Kiddies.

Said kiddies were knocking lumps out of Chopper with their ferocious addict strength. He could not restrain them without hurting them. He tried to convince them not to eat the candy. “I know it’s hard but you have to endure it!”

The thing is, Chopper was dealing with a double helping of trouble here. Not only are they kids, who are naturally more self-centred due to their developing brains. They are also addicts who are so far down the rabbit hole of whatever drug Caesar was peddling they’ll do anything for a fix.

When Chopper’s rumble ball wore off, the kids trampled him and thundered straight for the Biscuit Room, where Mocha was waiting alone.

Luckily, he was picked up by Nami, Zoro, Usopp, Robin, Brook and Foxfire. (Do not remember Brownbeard hanging around. Did he leave or did he just not have any lines?)

Robin tried to restrain the kids. That was interesting for two reasons: one, I didn’t know Robin could feel damage sustained by her extra hands, and two, she asked Usopp and Brook to try and find a pair of Sea Prism Stone cuffs because Luffy had asked her to. (I bet his plan is to cuff Caesar!)

The kids charged Mocha, who tried to tell them the candy was evil! Then Monet whirled into the room on a frosty zephyr. (The best part of this entrance was when Usopp shouted: “I TOLD YOU THERE WAS A BIRD WOMAN!” He was finally vindicated.)

Yay, thought Mocha. It’s Monet-san. She’s lovely!

Nooooope. Monet told her, in a sweet, ever-so-reasonable voice that it wasn’t nice to keep all the candy for herself. Mocha should share it with the others, like always. Mocha’s little face when she sensed betrayal was just heart-wrenching. “Why?” she whispered.

Because Monet is a nasty piece of work just like Caesar? Just a thought.

Not sure what’s going to happen here. There are a *lot* of Strawhats in the room, so I’m guessing Monet will be defeated by them. Then they’ll push through, deliver the cuffs and - BAM - we have one angry, kidnapped scientist.

Sanji Acquires Unexpected Fans

This was a short scene but the fact that Sanji has a cadre of devoted fans in the G5 is hilarious. Yeah, he claims he doesn’t want their approval. And he probably doesn’t.

But Sanji cannot stop himself running back to save the poor saps who can be saved.

This is the Sanji I like: surly on the outside with a golden heart on the inside. More, please!

And the Academy Award for Best Actor goes to . . .

CAESAR CLOWN!

Seriously.

The yarns this guy can spin could crush the GDP of a small textile-dependent country.

Caesar should run for office somewhere. Then he could appoint himself head of the science department.

For that is exactly what has been bugging him for years, it seems. He wants Vegapunk’s job.

Well... maybe not the job. (He’s getting by just fine thanks to pirates. A Government job would ruin that). It’s the fame and kudos. That’s what he’s after.

Plus he has a weird goal: to achieve world peace by obliterating all sources of conflict - collateral damage be damned. Unless he’s lying about that. Given his oscar-winning performance, that would not surprise me.

The action picked up with Caesar caesaring through a pipe and landing outside the Secret Room (I laughed when I realised everyone on Punk Hazard literally calls it the Secret Room).

He was bitching about having to enter the room because it was Vegapunk’s old office. Still, he claimed it was the only place where he could “pull it off”. (I am unsure why he had to go to Vegapunk’s old office just to close some doors, but I’ll chalk it up to plot and say no more.)

He promised to make Luffy, the Strawhats, G5 and Trafalgar Law pay for ruining his plan. It was all their fault! The experiment could have been a great show - everything perfect and beautiful and befitting of the world’s greatest scientist (Vegapunk says hi!) But they screwed it up. He couldn’t let the Strawhats do as they liked. They’d pushed it a little too far and he has Joker on his back now.

He ordered a minion to close the gates to Buildings C and D. This would lure all survivors into one narrow room. His plan? Trap them in the bottleneck and pump the room full of his poison gas through the air vents. He would broadcast it as a snuff movie for the brokers. That would show them what he was really made of!

But the minions hang on his every word and they caught one small discrepancy.

“Um... did you say that *you* had created the poison gas, Master?”

Caesar’s haughty reply was, “Yes, I did.”

“But it’s like Vegapunk’s gas. It freaks us out.” Understandably, the minions probably have ptsd from four years ago.

The moment when Caesar realised he’d let his ego run away with him and opened his big mouth was glorious. How could he spin this? How? The animators did a great job here. You could see the evil, conniving cogs turning in his mind.

Then he broke out his Oscar winning performance.

“This is . . . an avenging battle of science. My people! That day, I tried to stop the mad scientist, Vegapunk. No! If such a weapon exploded, what would happen to the people on the island?” Caesar even threw in a melodramatic “YAMEROOOOO, VEGAPUNK!” for some extra emotional sparkle.

“But the accident happened. And he still lords if over us as the head of the science department of the Marines. and he’s considered the world’s greatest scientist. I cannot tolerate it! He’s the cruel man who hurt you all! Do you think it’s right that people still call him the number one scientist? That’s why I want to prove them all wrong. I didn’t want to make a weapon of mass destruction! But I want to show them that there is a greater scientist here. That I am the greatest scientist in the world! When the Marines acknowledge it and when I become head of the science department, my dream will come true. I can use my scientific knowledge to bring peace to the world!”

I honestly had to stop myself giving Caesar a standing ovation. What a performance that was.

You know, it’s weird. Every lie Caesar told there has a basis in truth. That’s the most dangerous liar right there because the lies they tell are more believable. Does the Gas-Gas Fruit confer gaslighting powers too? Because Caesar is a hellishly efficient manipulator.

And while Caesar was congratulating himself, a flashback happened!

Caesar is Prime Material for /r/IAmVerySmart

Caesar with a bob was weird. I’m guessing when he moved to Punk Hazard, there was a lack of stylists, so he just grew his hair out. That hair you see right now? That is four years of growth.

At any rate, Caesar was doing something a bit more important back in Vegapunk’s lab. He was debating morality with some other scientists. They begged him to stop his experiment. If it exploded, it would kill everyone on the island.

Caesar was typically receptive to criticism. “STFU, boneheads! Where do you think you are? This is a Marine research facility. They want to kill as many pirates as the can. What they need is a weapon that will do it for them.”

“But they don’t want one that will also kill civilians!”

Caesar’s rebuttal? “It’s called collateral damage! If we blow away everything, we can bring peace to the world.” (Does he genuinely believe that? That’s a properly depressing view of the world he holds there, if true.)

“You’re so...”

Caesar had a, “I’m gonna stop you right there” moment. They wanted to say he was cruel? What a joke. They were using prisoners as guinea pigs as if they were trash. What was the difference? (Fair point, Caesar.) Moreover, Admiral Sengoku was too soft, but Akainu, if he was in charge, *he* would want a weapon Caesar made. (Also interesting. I hope Caesar never decides to change sides again. He would be dangerous in Akainu’s hands.)

He went off on one about how Vegapunk had failed to turn people into giants again. Caesar knows you can’t turn people into giants in a short period of time unless you use magic, so had suggested Vegapunk just kidnap some kids and feed them drugs until something worked. What a lovely idea, Caesar! xD

The flash forward revealed Caesar’s “William Birkin Moment”.

Just as he made a significant discovery, Marines burst in and cuffed him with sea prism stone. Vegapunk himself came to see off his old colleague. I was ONE HUNDRED PERCENT HYPED for about half a second. But there was no face.

Blue balled. Again. xD

Caesar was summarily dismissed from the Science Department. “Your eccentric behaviour is intolerable and I cannot protect you anymore, Caesar.”

Interesting that what the rest of the scientists did was viewed as fine and dandy, but Caesar taking it a step further was regarded as “eccentric”. First off, eccentric is a gross understatement. Secondly, what they’re doing is pretty evil too. Caesar is just overtly, unashamedly amoral. They hide it better.

Suffering such a humiliation, Caesar had his “SCREW YOU!” moment and pushed the big red button. Punk Hazard went up in a Mighty Kaboom-Boom Cloud.

Still wondering how they all survived that, but I will chalk it up to plot and say no more.

Of course, after Caesar’s theatrics, his minions fell over themselves to apologise. Sorry, Master! You are the saviour, after all.

“Thank you... thank you all,” Caesar simpered, while inside he called them unintelligent fools. So easily manipulated. Dumb as bricks.

This guy needs taking down several pegs. Maybe an entire cloakroom rack.

Luffy, please oblige asap.

Caesar tells a rip-roaring, thigh-slapper of a yo momma joke.

(No one laughed.)

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