#do clipped wings grow back fully or do you need to remove them so they grow back?

[cinthgarden]

More often than not—

[ailurocide]

Question- do companions get their wings clipped, or pinioned? Not to out myself as a bird nerd but while they're both very bad things to do to a bird, one is a LOT worse than the other.

Clipping a bird's wing means cutting back the primary flight feathers on one wing. Clipping only one wing prevents the bird from properly balancing in flight, meaning it'll swerve to one side and fall to the ground if it tries, so it won't be able to maintain flight. It's technically painless (though robbing a bird of its ability to fly is still Bad, they're designed almost entirely for wing-powered flight from the ground up. You should see what the avian respiratory system looks like), and is reversible.

After molting, the flight feathers will grow back, and the bird will be capable of flight unless its wings are re-clipped. However, clipping often starts before a bird can learn to fly, and even without that the wing muscles will atrophy over time due to disuse, meaning that a bird whose been getting wing-clipped every molt will still have a significant road to recovery after the clipping stops, and may need to be trained or re-trained on the basics of flight.

Pinioning is worse. Pinioning means amputating one wing just above the wrist joint (the second joint of the wing, further from the body. usually just past this, to leave the thumb/alula/"bastard wing" intact so its feathers cover the stump), usually while the bird is still so young that its bones haven't had time to harden, usually without painkillers of any sort. This has a similar effect to clipping, but A. it's fully permanent and B. it throws off the bird's balance even when on the ground, as that's a not-insignificant amount of weight removed from just one side (if both sides are clipped/pinioned, the lack of imbalance means the bird can re-learn how to fly even with shortened wings). Doesn't effect heavier birds like waterfowl too bad iirc, but those tend to keep both feet on solid ground (or just float on water).

A pinioned felfolk would likely have some trouble with delicate balancing, especially as instinct might tell them to use their wings to aid them in balancing- which only makes things worse, since one is, of course, pinioned. One with clipped wings might struggle a bit, but the weight difference would be a lot less drastic, and it's just a matter of waiting to molt & regrow those flight feathers (molts usually happen at least once a year for most species, sometimes more often but most will at least molt in late fall, so their feathers are in good condition to keep them warm during winter)

...Sorry for the unprompted nitpicky inbox essay, but both options have significantly different implications for dear Castel and I'm not good at keeping my mouth shut about bird stuff. Still, I hope this could be helpful to you in some way!

Okay first off: please don’t apologize!! Thank you sincerely for bringing this to my attention… I always love learning new things about animals, even if they’re heartbreaking like this.

Everybody say thank you to bird nerd anon!!

After reading through this a few times and really think about it, I’m gonna alter a few things now that I’m more informed:

(I’d also like to reiterate that what the Sunguard Guild does to their companions is barbaric and not the norm for Guilds and their companions. I do not support the practice of declawing, pinioning, or wing-clipping.)

The Sunguard Guild typically pinions their companions. They have this process done to prevent their companions from leaving the Guild, and typically the head of the primary companion family, or the overall oldest companion, is in charge of ensuring that the pinioning goes well and relatively smoothly.

So most of the current Sunguard companions have a pinioned wing.

[great-axepectations]

ooh bird info post for avian hybrids? also, what kind of bird? parrot, canary, chicken, domestic pigeon, something else?

I am the proud owner of two small parrots: a cockatiel and a black-capped conure. Birb tax!

I might as well do the avian hybrid post here! I think there are certain insights a bird owner could offer that would be useful to people writing avian hybrid characters. My expertise is small parrots but I'll try to be as general as possible. It's all fiction so none of this is law, but maybe there are some facts here that will help writers with fun details.

One thing is that birds have very high metabolisms! An avian character might be munching on snacks constantly to keep up (they also poop constantly but you don’t have to mention that in writing). This also means that they have very high internal temperatures--around 106 degrees to a human's ~98. Avian hybrids would be very warm to hug! A dangerous side of this is that birds also have very high blood pressure. It's likely a bird will bleed out before their blood can clot, unless you apply corn starch or styptic powder. Remember that if your avian hybrid is injured.

Birds are SO LOUD. Vocalization is how they communicate over long distances in the wild so they need to be heard! If my 90-gram conure is sitting on my shoulder and peeps at full volume, my ear will be ringing for a while afterwards. Some larger parrots can hit decibel levels comparable to a jet engine. If a bird hypothetically had human-sized lungs, they could probably cause permanent hearing damage. It's plausible for an avian hybrid to have a sonic screech attack!

Molting occurs about twice a year, when a bird gradually drops their ragged old feathers and grows them back. If a bird has clipped wings, it will eventually molt the cut feathers and grow new ones, making them capable of flight again. A new feather forms in a sheath or 'pin' that crumbles away when the feather is fully grown. These have blood in them as the feather growns, so it is painful if the sheath is broken too early. Pin feathers are itchy and uncomfortable, but mutual preening with a trusted partner to get those hard-to-reach spots is a wonderful bonding exercise for any bird or avian hybrid. The removed sheaths can make a mess, though--depending on the type of bird, it's either an oily dust or a very fine, chalky powder. An avian hybrid's home will probably need excellent ventilation, frequent dusting, and a powerful air filter. Some birds also maintain their feathers with dust baths--god help you if your avian hybrid does that indoors.

Most birds are prey animals, so they are constantly vigilant for predators (if your avian hybrid is a raptor then I can't help you). This means they have very good hearing and sight. They are also jumpy, and if something spooks them they will go "NO THINK, FLY NOW" and smack right into a window. A sick bird will be picked out of the flock by a predator, so birds will hide any symptoms of illness until they are nearly dead. An avian hybrid might be more capable of expressing their illness, but I can imagine this trait being used as the basis of an angsty sickfic.

Your avian hybrid might be more resilient than an average bird, but birds are incredibly fragile. The hollow bones thing is true, and they break easily. Their powerful little lungs are very sensitive to fumes (canary in a coal mine, anyone?), and even something like a cleaning spray or scented candle can be deadly. Common household substances can be poisonous, like chocolate, coffee, and avocado. (If this post is making you consider getting a pet bird, do A LOT more research. Bird ownership isn't just having a pet, it's a lifestyle choice.)

But to end on a happier note: birds are as varied as humans in showing affection. A happy and relaxed bird will have fluffed-up feathers, one foot tucked up, eyes closed, and slowly grinding their beak (maybe your hybrid could instinctually grind their teeth to imitate that?) Most birds are not cuddly, but my conure is never happier than when she's snuggled in my hand or sleeping in my shirt. She doesn't mind being picked up like an ice cream cone--my cockatiel would throw a screeching fit if I tried that with her. But she will still spend all day napping on my lap while I work, and will tuck her little head up under my nose so I can give her kisses.

This post is already WAY too long but please do send more questions if you want help writing more realistic avian hybrids!

[shadowkat678]

What’s the difference between Wingless and Flightless in ur society?

Is the title of ‘clipped wings’ referring to the kind of clipping where the muscles are permanently severed or the temporary kind where the flight feather is trimmed and grows back when they molt

So, Flightless are anyone who gets caught committing a crime. Their wings are clipped, and yes it is the first option and very permanent. And they all are sort of put into their own cast, and live on the flying earth motes around the main bulk of the city. They're the ones that tend and harvest the farms, go down to the surface below on the back of giant beetles accompanying the mages to gather occasional materials the city needs, and do any dangerous jobs. There is no coming back, but they do work on a reincarnation cycle of belief where the church teaches that if you atone you'll be forgiven in the next life, instead of reincarnated as an animal or something akin to that.

(The main goal being joining their afterlife with their creators. The answer to if it actually works this way or even similar with some twists put in over time by the head of the church is left purposefully vague. Also of note despite the afterlife cycle feeling more like Hinduism and similar systems the church general vibe definitely takes more catholic inspiration and aesthetics. Because.... *Long Sigh* Reasons. I Wonder What Those Could Be.)

The Wingless are a subclass of Flightless that commit the worst crimes and have their wings fully removed as a physical mark of their transgressions that sets them apart even further and serves as a reminder both to themselves and those around them. Murder. Treason. Plotting against the city. Things that don't happy often, because of the high cost, but they do happen.

The Flightless as a whole loses all their rights as citizens. When supplies are rationed, they get the barest amount necessary. They are not allowed to have children, and any found are taken and adopted out into other families in the city. Any mages who become Flightless have their connection to magic severed. There's pretty much no oversight or protection, but as mentioned in the main post there are volunteers that occasionally visit the surrounding motes to provide healing and aid.

They can take on more dangerous jobs, such as trips below to the ground, in order to get more benefits but doing so also runs the risk of a very short life expectancy, and people who do it long basically get magic radiation poisoning as some areas still have retained quite a bit of residue left over from the war. Still coming up with a name of what to call it, but it's rough. They have kinda gained their own community enforcement, culture, and ways of life to cope, like any group that's been isolated together, but the general conditions are not great and both groups kinda share these same sorts of expectations. The Wingless are just a smaller subgroup with some added baggage.

In total, I'd say the Flightless make up 15%-20% of the city's population at any given time, with the Wingless making up a much smaller 2-4% within that.

And you know...if they ever run short of workers it's not hard to get more. I'm not being very subtle with the prison labor commentary.

[jasmindoodles]

“I’m not just another number”

Pairing: Arc trooper Fives x oc

Word count: 4.7k

Warning: None

A/N: This chapter was recently been updated, so some things have changed but its still mostly the same idea. Big thanks to my friend Alexa for helping me, couldn’t have done it without her!

Chapter: 1 | 2 |

Chp. 1- A sight to behold

Fives really didn’t have any expectations for his first mission after being promoted to arc trooper, but this certainly wasn’t it. He was on a diplomatic mission of all things. He was to accompany General Skywalker and General Kenobi. Along with him Commander Cody, Captain Rex, and Echo were also requested to come along. This was a very special mission personally requested by Senator Amidala herself. They were asked to go to a planet called “Toralu” who was interested in discussing a possible alliance. He definitely wasn’t going to complain about coming here though. On his travels he had heard rumors and whispers of Toralu’s wild, lush, and mountainous landscape. It was said to be one of the most breath-taking planets in its system.

As the dropship approached the surface of the planet the side doors opened.

Suddenly As the ship turned a ray of warm orange light seeped through the door.

“Gosh my eyes! Of course, I have to be standing right next to the door.” Fives though as he quickly raised his hand to shield his eyes. As his eyes slowly adjusted to the light, he lowered his hand to finally reveal the planet below.

“The rumors really don’t have anything on this planet” Fives admitted to himself as he gazed out the ship.

Below stood a planet with never ending golden sands and glimmering turquoise waters. From the sands bust forth black rock cliffs caped in deep green brush, flowing into low dense valleys. The Landscape was dotted with exotic Flora and flowers as far as the eye could see. The planet just screamed warmth and life. From its thick forests, delicate flowers, to its tranquil seas.  As his glimpse of the shores disappeared, he instead turned his attention to their white circular landing pad.

Alright men get ready were dropping shortly, stated Rex. Fives started gathering all his gear together.

Once the ship landed fives exited the ship in line. As he stepped down off the ship and scanned his surroundings, he immediately landed on the magnificent palace. There in the mountains stood a palace that beamed golden rays as if manifesting the sun itself. It seemingly melded and became one with the earth as vines flowed and intertwined with its many archways. The outside of The Place had wing-like glass archways that wrapped around the entirety of the building. From there rose sharp curved towers that resembled tongues of golden fire, reaching as if to touch the heavens. These towers encircled a dome of shimmering glass holding high the queen’s royal crest.

“Fives can you get your head out of the clouds and stop gawking at the planet. Hurry up and get on line, we don’t have all day” shouted Rex. Swiftly Exiting the ship behind the generals, they were immediately stopped and meet with greeters and other servants.

“Hello welcome honored quest, we are so pleased to have you on Toralu! Please take these gifts, as they are directly from the queen” stated the head Greeter. In the greeter’s hand lay a Flower clip. The flower had a crown of fuchsia petals blending into the bell-shaped purple petals below. It slowly draped down with short fuchsia vines holding little buds at the end. Please wear them when you’re in the palace as they signify that you all are special guests of the queen. If you need anything, please show this clip to any servant and your needs will be swiftly taken care of. All the servants quickly bowed and held out the flower clips to each person.

“Well at least the locals are friendly” Fives though to himself.

As they are handed the gifts, He just looks at Echo mildly amused, shrugging at one another not knowing what to do with the gifts they’ve been handed. Quickly he scrambles to find a place to clip it on him. He clips it on his belt and follows the generals down the walkway.

The group is escorted by a few of the servants down a long path that eventually leads to the palace. As the entrance slowly came into view, they noticed how heavily guarded it is. The doors were made of heavy gold being at least 3 times any human’s size. The entrance truly looked impenetrable. Once they approached the generals moved to the side to speak to one of the queen’s greeters privately. After a few moments passed General Skywalker quickly motioned for them to follow him. They followed him down a crescent shaped hallway with tall arch’s All the ceilings and adjacent archways were delicately painted with gold and elaborate paintings decorated the walls. Finally, they had reached the end of their walk as they came to stop at an impressive and imposing throne room. As they entered the first thing, they noticed an intricately crafted marble floor which led to a set of tall stairs. The stairs skillfully lead their eyes up to a large throne which sat perfectly Infront of a plethora of floor to ceiling windows.

Suddenly he noticed there were three people talking to one another off to the side, a man and two ladies. One of the women had her back to them, so he couldn’t see any of her features. Something about her though just captivated all his attention. He felt like he couldn’t look away even if he wanted to.

From behind he could see she was dressed in a long floor length dress that softly swayed as she moved. The Dress was a delicate mint that slowly faded down to a bright fuchsia. The gown was also adorned with golden shoulder plates that wrapped around the back of her neck making a high collar. Her shoulder plates connected to puffy sheer sleeves that tightened around her forearms. The rest of her was hidden from his view because of her long flowing brown hair, which she had half pinned up in an elaborate headpiece.

As the greeter made their presence known to her, she turned around to greet her guests. When he finally laid eyes on her, she completely took his breath away. There were so many rumors about how breathtaking the planet was, but they had never mentioned how the people were even more so. As she gracefully walked closer, he saw how elaborately she was dressed. It finally hit him.

“Oh my Goodness she’s the queen”! Queen Kira Luana! Fives though.

With her now In full view he could soak in everything about her. She had piercing mint eyes that were calculating and gentle. He also noticed how she had multiple thin golden markings. One that curved from the top of her cheekbones down to the corners of her lips, and another that started at the bottom of her lower lip and traveled under her chin. With her gown fully in view he noticed the dress’s heart shaped neckline trimmed with gold. She also wore a gold-plated corset belt, complementing her hourglass figure. The dress fanned out into two flowing front slits giving view to her clothed legs. Her hair swayed delicately as she walked closer and making his heart race faster and faster as she grew near.

She greeted the generals first, her smooth and silky voice sending shivers down his spine. Then she turned her attention to him and his fellow clones, giving them a sweet smile. Seeing just her smile made his heart flutter and him feel knees feel weak,

‘Get a hold of yourself Fives!’ he thought scoldingly.

She asks the generals in a gentle voice “Would your troops be so kind as to remove their helmets, please? I would like to see the rest of my guests' faces.”

‘Oh no!’ He thinks.

General Skywalker tilted his head back with a smirk and a small chuckle saying “Well boys you heard the queen, remove the helmets”

As he removed his helmet, he can feel himself start to blush, making him feel more flustered.

‘It’s not like I’ve never seen a pretty girl before! What is up with me! Come on get yourself together Fives!’ He thinks to himself. She’s different though. She is the most beautiful person he’d ever laid his eyes upon. She wasn’t your typical pretty face you would meet at 79s, she is a queen. Fives stared to get the strange feeling that someone was looking at him intently. As he looked to his left, he was immediately meet with a scolding gaze from Echo. That look firmly told him to get himself together and straighten up. The queen started to speak grabbing everyone’s attention, diffusing the growing tension between Five’s and Echo.

“Oh my, who knew there were such handsome faces hidden underneath those helmets” she said as she walked past them examining them.

Any semblance of composure that Fives had gained went out the window at her words. What she said left him even more of a flustered mess then before. Kira swiftly turned back towards the General’s to discuss details about their stay on Toralu. Out of nowhere, Fives suddenly felt Echo jab his elbow into his side causing him to jump and be abruptly brought out of his daze.

Two servants then walked into the throne room and once they finished talking stepped in front of the General’s.

“Generals’ if you would please allow us, we would like to show you and your warriors to your respective rooms” said the servant’s.

“Of course, Thank you, please lead the way” Obi One said as he gestured forward. After walking down more arched golden hallways they reached their destination. They stopped in front of two side by side doors.

“These will be the rooms you’ll be staying in.”

“Generals, you both will be staying in the left room and your men will stay in the right room beside yours. I’ll show you the room inside, Kamikara will show your men their room.” The two servant’s then ushered them separately.

As the clones walked in the room, they all gawked at how lavish it was. It had high arched ceilings, windows with a view, and best of all white plush beds with mountains of pillows. Fives immediately turned around and asked the servant ‘This can’t be our room, are you sure you’ve got the right place?”  

“Oh most certainly, only the best for the Queen’s quests” Kamikara said confidently.

“Now there are fresh clean clothes on the beds for you to change into if you so wish. Also, the refresher is on the right and a gentle reminder that the queen would like to have all of your presences at dinner at 19:00”.

“Wait, does the Queen actually want us to dine with her and the generals?” Fives blurted out.  

The servant girl looked taken aback and momentarily confused but then answered, “Why yes of course, it’s customary to feast with all the guests here on Toralu.”

Fives then said with a confused look on his face “But we’re just soldiers, we’re not meant to dine with a queen.”

“To the queen it matters not what rank you are, she views everyone as her equal and wants to make everyone feel welcomed. Unless you want to upset her by not coming to dine with her?”

Cody jumped in immediately “Don’t mind my friend here, we’re just not used to being the ones invited to dine. I assure you we’ll be ready for dinner at the proper time”

Kamikara’s slight frown quickly became a large bubbly smile at Cody’s words. “Perfect! I’ll come by a few minutes before to escort you all to the dining room. In the meantime, you can relax in your room or feel free to walk around the palace, even roam around the city as well, if you so please. If you need anything, use the intercom by the door and a servant will come, there are also servants all around the palace if you are in need of assistance. Now before I take my leave, do any of you have any questions or in need of something?”

Everyone was in shock by what she had said, but then he heard Rex clear his throat and say “No, thank you ma’am, um we’re fine.”

Ok great! Well, I hope you enjoy your stay here. Kamikara said as she left the room.

Fives scoffed “Wow! I can’t believe this room is for us. Hey Cody, Rex, does this usually happen in these types of missions? You know, where we're treated like normal people.”

Cody chuckled, “Enjoy it while you can Fives.” Echo playfully shoving him in the process.

Cody started walking to the door with Rex not far behind “We’re going to go speak with the generals. You boys enjoy yourselves in the meantime.” Cody mockingly said.

Fives curiously raised his eyebrow at them as they left. Eventually though he turned and looked at Echo shrugging it off guessing whatever it was they were going to talk about, he didn’t need to know.

“You heard the captain.”

Fives made a mad dash for the bed playfully shoving Echo out of the way in the process. Once Fives reached the bed he fell back on the soft plush bed. Relishing in how soft the bed was he buried himself in the mounds of pillows. Echo just shook his head and sighed as he walked towards the refresher. Once fives heard the door shut, he sat up and thought “Well if I want to explore the room, now is the time”. As he got up and walked around the room, he noticed a large balcony thru a frosted glass door. As he opened the door to the balcony, his face was hit by a warm gentle breeze. The wind carried the sweet smell of exotic flowers and the salty bite of the sea.

“Man, I just can’t get enough of this smell” Five’s though as he took in a large deep breath.

He felt the tension leave his neck and shoulders as all his senses took in the flora and beach that laid in his view. Behind him he heard Echo open the door to the refresher, slowing walking back in the room. Fives walked towards the door and leaned on its frame. “Echo you have got to see this view it’s amazing!”

“Ok, well if you would move your big butt out of the door then maybe I would!” Echo said with a playful smirk.

Just as Echo reached the door Cody opened the Front door with Rex in tow. Immediately Echo and Fives stopped and straightened up getting in line. “What are our orders Commander?”

There are none for right now, the generals are going to speak with the Queen, so I suggest you both should take this opportunity to rest up.”

“Yes sir!” Both Echo and Fives then relaxed and moved over to sitting down on their beds.

Echo quickly got comfortable lounging back on his bed. “Finally, I’m going to get a chance to read up on my data pad.”

Fives just shook his head while saying under his breath “Echo I think you were left in your growth chat too long.”

Fives slowly laid down on the soft bed. “Honestly it feels so strange laying on something so comfy. I don’t know, maybe I’m just too used to our rocks for beds.” As he got comfortable his eyes slowly grew heavier and heavier, until eventually Fives was fast asleep.

Fives bolted up from his sleep in a panic, sweat slowly dripping down his brow. ‘ It was just a nightmare” fives panted. “Gosh what time is it.” Taking a quick glance at the clock he noticed almost 2 hours had passed by, fortunately there was still plenty of time before dinner. Scanning the room he looked over to where Echo should be on his bed, but it was empty. Cody and Rex were nowhere to be seen. “I wonder if I should comm them?”As he reached to grab his comm fives thought, “ Wait… they may be in negotiations with the general’s and queen, best not bother them.” As fives pondered it hit him. “I know I’ll bother Echo!” he grabbed his comm an dialed.

“Hey Echo, where are you?”

“Oh, I’m in the art gallery.”

“Art gallery?”

“Yeah, I wanted to learn more about the culture of Toralu and there just so happened to be a gallery in the palace. It’s got so much interesting art and it's full of fascinating cultural pieces, ooooh wow like this unique plant life ....” Echo’s voice trailed off as something grabbed his attention and distracted him from the conversation. As Fives stood there waiting for Echo to regain his focus he rolled his eyes, growing in his frustration.

“Echo! Just tell me how to get to you?!” he impatiently shouted.

“Oh that’s easy, when you leave the room take a left down the hall, then walk a little and take a right and to your left there should be a large fountain, it’s right on the other side of it.”

“Finally! Ok, I’m coming to you.”  

If he remembered right, there were supposed to be two servants alongside two guards on either side of the hallway. Coming out of the room he looked left and right, and just as he thought there were two servants alongside two guards on either side of the hallway. He turned left out of his door and respectfully nodded at the guards and servant’s as he walked past them. After some time of walking down the hallway, fives started to notice what looked like two entrances on the right.

“That can’t be right! Echo never mentioned two entrances.”

Running his hands through his hair in frustration fives sarcastically huffed “This is just great!

Finally calming down fives leaned back against the wall pushing his head back, “Ok think, what should I do? I could comm Echo but who knows how long it would take to get an answer out of him. Or I could just go for it since I do have a fifty-fifty chance.”

Running his hand over his temples and through his hair he reluctantly came to the conclusion “I’m just going to go for it and choose the closest entrance. What’s the worst that could happen anyways?

Walking down the hall for a few minutes fives let out a long frustrated sigh “This is taking way too long, I should have reached the fountain already.”

“It’s got to be just around the corner, this place can’t be that big” thinking to himself in denial.

After walking for what seemed like forever, he saw a grand entrance at the end of the hallway. Getting closer he noticed the entry archway had massive marble pillars covered in vines sprinkled with small purple flowers. Past the archway laid a well-manicured courtyard and a magnificent view of the ocean. Taking in the elegant scenery fives thought,

“Echo never said anything about this place but maybe the gallery entrance is somewhere around here?” As he scoured for anything that looked like the entrance to the art gallery, he suddenly heard voices. Being curious he followed the voices and straight away stumbled upon the queen and her advisers. 

Panic sets in and he rushes back to the hallway hiding behind the wall, he peaks around the corner and sees she’s turned opposite to him, talking with her advisers. ‘Why am I so nervous?! Also why am I hiding?’ Thinking to himself, he notices another entrance on the other side of the opening and looks back where the queen was. She was still distracted talking, so he took his chance and tried his best to look inconspicuous but just a few steps in and the queen noticed. 

“Excuse me!” Fives winced and stopped dead in his tracks.

“You’re one of general Skywalker’s troopers, correct?” Going into autopilot Fives turns around while straightening himself answering “Yes sir. Arc trooper Fives at your service.” 

Fives relaxed enough to lay his gaze upon the one asking the question and  there in front of him stood in all her beauty, Queen Kira Luana. Making his breathing hitch and sending his heart racing.

She smiles at him sweetly and starts walking towards him. ‘By the force she’s beautiful!’ He thinks to himself, clenching his fist tighter as she gets closer. He keeps his eyes looking straight forward for fear that if he looked directly at her he would crack.

She stops in front of him and asks in a very gentle and smooth voice “are you lost Fives?” He can feel lightning crawling up his spine at her saying his name so gentle, making him weak at the knees. So in tranced by her words he almost doesn’t answer her, stuttering for a response he clears his throat “Um n-no your highness, I-I was uhh going to the visitors art gallery! Haha” ‘Wow! Really Fives!? That sounded so stupid!’

She smiles endearingly up at him humming. ‘Oh my force! Stop it woman!! Are you trying to give me a heart attack’

“Well if you’re going to the visitors art gallery you’re going in the complete opposite way.” Now she’s just smirking at him. Embarrassed now, he tries to act confident “I knew that, I just wanted to take a detour is all, considering how beautiful this palace is.” Smiling like a buffoon.

Raising an eyebrow at him she says in response “You have no idea where you are, do you?

Realizing he’s been figured out, sighs “Forgive me your highness, I think I might’ve taken the wrong turn, if you could just point me in the direction of the gallery and I’ll be out of your way.” Says defeatedly.

She looks pass him down the hallway and says “I could” then looks back at him “But first I have a favor to ask of you.” Looking back at him.

Confused he stutters to ask “uhh umm what w-would that favor be, your highness?” Trying to give a dashing smile but failing in the process.

At that she smiles again at him “ Would you mind walking with me to the gardens?”

He raises his eyebrows not knowing to respond,” uhhh-“ before he can answer she cuts him off saying “ If you don’t want to, that is fine I understand, you are probably tired and would like to rest.” Looking a little disappointed. He immediately jumps to says “N-No! I-I w-would love too! It would be an honor!” At that she instantly perked up, smiling once again. Before they start walking she turns back to her advisers and dismisses them. Turning back to Fives she grabs his arm, making him blush to the point where he has to turn his head the other way so she wouldn’t notice.

As they walk in unison Fives sorta starts to calm his heartbeat, until the queen starts talking. “I hope your rooms are to your liking, I’ve never had clones stay at my palace before, so I wasn’t exactly sure what you all would like.” Fives almost choked on his own saliva at what he was hearing, but quickly composed himself. “Trust me it is more than fine. Thank you, your highness. You didn’t have to do that for us clones, we’re used to far less.” Ending his statement with a nervous laugh.

“That’s... Disheartening to hear, you and your men are what’s holding up the Republic’s side of the war alongside the Jedi. Surely you should be recognized for your hard work, right? You all are putting your lives on the line and should be treated with the highest regard; although I know war is not a very accommodating situation. ” Looking at him with concern.

“That’s very kind of you to think that of us, your highness. But we are just another weapon of the Republic, we’re meant to be expendable. Me and my brothers aren’t even considered living beings to some.” He looks away as he says that, clenching his jaw.

Kira looking upset at his words “But that is not true! How could someone or anybody for that matter look at you and think you are not a living being? It’s outrageous!!” Fives response “Maybe it’s because others don’t understand or just don’t know, some look down upon us because we are genetically made instead of naturally born, like the rest of the galaxy.”

Thinking on what he says the queen takes a deep breath and exhales as she begins again “ I’m sorry about that, truly I am. No one or thing should be treated like that. Me and my people, we are taught to value all living beings whether they are born through the will of the force or genetically made. Know that even though my planet is neutral and does not participate in this war, you and your brothers are valued in my eyes and in the eyes of my people.” Fives a bit shocked goes on “ Thank you, your highness. That means a lot coming from someone such as yourself.”

“ All who meet you should be thanking you and your brothers for your sacrifices” bringing her hand to her chin in a thinking pose, she responds “ and I thank you for telling me this, I’ll have to take it into consideration for when I make my decision.”

“Pardon?” he was a bit confused at her words. She looks back at him “ oh do not worry, just know you have opened my eyes to a world unbeknownst to me, I thank you for that.” Looking forward again.

“If I may ask your highness, how do you treat your soldiers?”

“Well for one, we do not call them soldiers, we call them Makakoin warriors and they are treated with the highest respect. They’re specially chosen and put into training from a very young age. From the Makakoin warriors only a few are selected to actually be the queen's royal bodyguards. It requires even harsher training that not everyone can withstand. The ones who become warriors are given one of the highest honors and in return they honor and benefit their families. It’s quite different from the Republic who mass-produce soldiers and from what you told me, see you as nothing but weapons. I mean no offense by that.”

That last part makes him chuckle a little “ None taken, us clones are  just the republics means to an end. Many beings view us as disposable instruments of war but a few appreciate and value us for who we are. What you speak of though has many similarities to how our Jedi are selected.   

“Exactly! Our training and beliefs are very similar to the Jedi and we greatly respect their methods of training.'' 

“Now, it’s my turn to ask a question” She looked at him with mischief in her eyes, which made simultaneously excited and nervous. “Oh dear, please your majesty have mercy on me.” Saying it in a playful way which made her giggle and that made him blush again but also feel pride in knowing he was the cause for that lovely sound, he 

had to bite his bottom lip to keep himself from smiling like a giddy little boy. “Hmm you’ve peaked my interest Fives.”

“I hope that’s a good thing.” as they keep on with their conversation he becomes more relaxed and has this weird fuzzy feeling inside.

___________

Meanwhile echo was starting to get a bit concerned that he hasn’t seen Fives yet. ‘He should have been there by now!’ Echo thinks while he’s looking around the gallery. As he does so a servant notices him and asks if everything is ok. “Yes, I’m just looking for my brother.” He goes to exit the gallery in an attempt to find his mischievous brother. ‘Ugh he probably got lost, the fool! Frustrated, he goes down to the fountain to see if by some chance he’s there, but sadly he wasn’t. He goes to com him but he doesn’t answer “oh come on Fives answer me!” But no response. So he coms Rex to see if by some miracle Fives was with him.

“What is it, Echo?”

“Sir, is Fives with you?”

“No. I thought he was with you. Please don’t tell me he’s run off somewhere unsupervised.”

Echo can hear the dread in his voice “Well, uhh about that sir...”

“I don’t want to hear it, just go find him and come back to the room.”

“Yes sir, Roger that!”

[aarcanechaoss]

2. Afraid

YPHS is a clever team, they did their research. They know how to beat their opponents with grins on their faces. Reality hits for the teams at the training camp, cockiness gets you no where in Yokohama is seems.

The first day of training everyone got to watch the matches, just made it easier to get into the motion of things... and so all the teams could learn how the Yokohama team worked. Was it signals? Words? Pure practice? Telepathy! They just worked so well together.

Gin adjusted her mask and took her place on the court giving a sneaky wink to Atsushi who’s face became dusted in pink. Ryoko laughed to herself as she took place on the court across from Karasuno’s Ace Asahi Azumane. She quirked a brow at him and winked making him blush and cough- in turn the pinkette began laughing.

“Don’t tease the opposition Fukami.” Fyodor reprimanded. “It’s unbecoming.”

She poked her tongue out his way before letting a lazy grin rest on her lip. “Make me Dostoevsky.”

Akutagawa groaned at their interaction and turned to Dazai and Chuuya who hadn’t taken place yet.

“Game plan five!” Chuuya yelled with a feral grin once Dazai had taken place in front of Kageyama.

“Game plan five.” The team chorused- the other teams looked apprehensive- what did that even mean?

“Karasuno can pick how they’d like to start.” Hirotsu said to Ukai who nodded to Daichi.

“We’d like to receive.” Karasuno’s Captain said missing the YPHS’ animalistic grins.

“Karasuno are fucked.” Oikawa muttered, Iwaizumi only nodded.

“Go Hinata!” Atsumu yelled out making the ginger boy grin brightly.

“Christ he’s like the fucking sun!” Ryoko barked out. “Be prepared little crows, your wings might get clipped.” Her orange eyes seemed to glow at the challenge, one Tanaka and Nishinoya were more than willing to make a fuss over.

Dazai threw the ball into the air, eyes locked onto the space between the two middle blockers as his palm hit the volleyball. Like slow motion Karasuno and the other teams watched the ball go from Dazai’s hand to exactly where he wanted it to land. A loud THUNK pulled them out of their stupor. Tanaka and Nishinoya were the first to yell out.

“How!?” Hinata yelled out amazed.

“Well I threw the ball in the air and then hit the ball.” Dazai said making Chuuya snort.

“Hinata withhold your fanboying until after the match.” Daichi reminded.

“Oh right sorry.” He smiled.

The game continued like that, Ryoko always hitting back but never very hard. Tanaka however got cocky and sent a ball her way but she was quick hit it right back at him. The ball stayed in the air for a few more hits before Dazai was sent the ball, he bent back, Karasuno expecting him to send the ball to Atsushi but with a quick flick of the wrist sent to Gin who happily slammed the ball down to where Tsukishima had been standing moments ago.

One serve from Karasuno looked to be giving them a point but the pinkette was quick, knees sliding on the ground, arms connecting with the ball.

“Akutagawa!”

Ennoshita and Yamaguchi were right. They had their asses handed on silver platters. With only one point to Karasuno’s names they bowed their heads and thanked Yokohama for the game.

Hinata while saddened by their loss made a beeline for Ryoko and Atsushi who hadn’t quite left the court yet.

“Hello! I’m Shoyo Hinata, first year, middle blocker and future Ace.” He said joyfully making the two taller students chuckle.

“I know we said our names earlier but as a proper introduction I’m Ryoko Fukami, second year, Ace and opposite hitter.”

“Atsushi Nakajima, first year and middle blocker same as you.” The silver haired boy said shyly. Hinata beamed at them.

“When you guys are free could I ask your team questions on your skills and teamwork?” The ginger asked, eyes shaking in excitement. He was practically buzzing. The second year barked a laugh and nodded.

“Yeah Chuuya will have some good tips for you- both being short and I don’t mean that in a bad way so I hope that didn’t offend ya sunshine.” Ryoko said. Hinata only seemed to glow brighter. “Plus it’s a training camp you are meant to learn.”

“She’s right.” Atsushi confirmed with a nod.

“Thank-you so much!” He bowed before running to grab Kageyama who seemed to be brooding over whether he should talk to Dazai about his sets. He didn’t but he thought about it.

Fyodor made a notion to head towards Ukai so both teams could talk to each other’s coaches which they smiled at.

“Hello I’m coach Ukai and this is their faculty advisor Takeda.” Ukai announced before nodding slightly behind him. “These are the managers Kiyoko and Yachi.”

“Hi.” The team said.

“Look I don’t have much to say so I’ll keep it quick, you guys are good and I hope our crows have a lot to learn from you guys and that you find something as well.”

“Thank-you Coach Ukai.” Chuuya said spurring the rest of the team to thank him too. Takeda honestly just stood there awkwardly- honestly the presence of the Yokohama team was scary.

Karasuno stood with coach Hirotsu and Ranpo with Fyodor and Tanizaki close by.

“You guys did well, that quick attack of yours is very useful and interesting.” Hirotsu began.

“But we lost.” Yamaguchi said quietly.

“No shame in that. It’s a training camp you’ll learn and grow over the next month or so. Our team is good because they are strong and know their strengths and work on their weaknesses. They are flexible and keen which you can be too with practice.”

“Thank-you coach Hirotsu.” Daichi said with a smile.

“Realistically you could have made three points that entire match.” Ranpo said whilst munching on a chocolate bar. The team looked quizzical. “You almost landed that point on Fukami before she slid in to hit the ball towards Akutagawa if you had angled the ball slightly more to the left she could have missed. The second one was earlier in the second round with the ball heading towards an empty space but if Dazai wasn’t just that bit fast it would have landed as well.”

“Ranpo is correct. Our team is fast and any of those two would have landed if they weren’t.” Fyodor chimed in.

“But... only three points?” Tanaka grimaced. Ranpo nodded.

“Alright alright go sit down, mingle and watch the next match it’s Inarizaki and Aoba Johsai.” Hirotsu laughed.

The day seemed to fly by, YPHS winning every match they had, the only one coming close being Shiratorizawa. Hinata was definitely amazed no doubt so where others. Kageyama, Kenma (surprisingly), Shirabu, Semi, Atsumu and Akaashi had been rounded up by Dazai who was exclaiming how he just needed to talk to the setters about their plays- somehow he managed to kidnap Sugawara from his place beside Daichi too.

“Sorry about him-“ Oda said scratching the back of his head. “He likes talking to other setters about their plays and stuff something about sharing information.” Chuuya scoffed before muttering.

“Dazai is a manipulative little shit.” The red head huffed. “What’s next we all break off into our respective positions and talk ball?”

“Not a bad idea Nakahara.” Hirotsu said before sending a questioning look to other coaches who seemingly agreed.

“What the fuck coach?” Chuuya exclaimed.

“It’s alright shortie go make friends with the other Liberos.” Ryoko smiled. Fyodor locked eyes with her and blinked slowly as a warning. She quirked a brow. “Oppposite hitters aka right wing spikers come my way.”

Fourteen other people followed quickly behind the pink haired wing spiker towards the benches to sit. Slowly everyone split off a couple managers joining groups- Fyodor joining Oda and Ryoko, Junichiro joining Atsushi and Gin.

“How do we feel boys?” The pinkette said lazily as she lent into her seat.

“Satisfactory however I would have preferred to win.” Ushijima answered whilst staring at Ryoko.

“Cant win every game eagle eyes.” She sassed.

“Can I ask something?” Daichi began. The opposite hitters nodded. “How did you do that knee slide it was very, libero-esque? But it also looked like it hurt.”

“Good eye. Ryoko tends to copy people’s movements. Chuuya as our Libero does that move a lot. I doubt it hurt her she’s got skin of obsidian.” Oda joked.

“Harhar mr I broke my collarbone throwing my arm up to catch a ball.”

“Quiet fire breath.” Fyodor snapped.

“Alright one touch.” She huffed, “He’s so mean to me. Boys take pity on this poor girl would you.”

“That’s what managers are for.” Osamu and Ushijima said in sync. The two players giving an awkward look.

“Oh yeah Rika was happy we kicked your asses.” Ryoko grinned.

“You know Matsuo?” Ushijima’s brows furrowed.

“We met before the games started. Anyway anything else? Questions queries things to share?”

“May I?” The Russian said. Nekoma’s spiker nodded. “You all have weaknesses that need to be worked on. Ryoko is too headstrong but she’s fast she knows how to make it look like she’s going to fail. Her flaw is that she finds too much enjoyment in teasing her opponents. Oda is smart and strong and knows how to guide the ball his flaw is that he’ll focus on his teammates over the opposition. Shiratorizawa is strong and fast but you only focus on that. Karasuno is an erratic team but have their skills honed work on the other ones. Fukurodani I honestly have nothing to add par your Captain being too over the top a points. Aoba Johsai trust their captain fully but need to also trust themselves. Nekoma are like well oiled machines and need to remove the need to be perfect all the time. Inarizaki showcased strength but also showcased cockiness, something YPHS shut down immediately as that is our biggest strength shutting down our opponents. Finally Itachiyama needs to get out of the slump that keeps them from reaching all potentials no matter how strong or fast their hits are. That is all.”

All but the two Yokohama players stared at the Russian in awe. He was sharp and to the point. Ushijima hummed lowly.

“I accept this criticism. I shall bring it up with coaches Washijo and Saito.”

“Yeah I’ll speak with Oikawa and Iwazumi.” Kunimi added.

“You aren’t wrong-“ Daichi started before realising he didn’t know the managers name.

“Fyodor Dostoevsky. Third year manager for Yokohama’s team.”

“Fyodor.” Daichi continued. “I’ll tell Ukai.”

“Yeah coach will probably agree with you.” Konoha laughed before pointing towards his coach who was about ready to either murder Bokuto or rip out his hair.

“Your coach looks ready to kill Bokuto.” The Itachiyama hitter laughed. “But I agree our team might be strong and fast but we are a little blinded by wanting to make sure we aren’t uncomfortable on the court.”

“We do have some pretty cocky members sorry.” Kosaku said scratching his neck. “Your twin is too confident Osamu.”

“I know.” He sighed.

All the teams went through this. Speaking to other players and having the Yokohama team submit their input on places to improve. Chuuya’s group being the loudest only being rivalled by Bokuto alone.

“Dinner will be ready in an hour and a half if anyone wants showers now go do it otherwise have them after dinner you can all congregate here and practice or hang out whatever teenagers do Ranpo will keep an eye on you-“

“Why do I have to do it Hirotsu?”

“Because you’re the youngest of us adults and I said so.” The man smiled scarily. So that’s where the Yokohama team got their game face. “And in any case you already know your rooms are by year group par the girls. Anyway go do your things and meet in the cafeteria next door in an hour thirty. Go.”

Hinata for the second time that afternoon rushed towards Atsushi but this time the white haired boy was with Gin.

“Atsushi! Would you like to hang out with me and Kenma before dinner?” Hinata gleamed. “Would you like to join as well fellow middle blocker?”

“Sure. Gin do you want to come?” Atsushi asked.

“Sure kitty.” She whispered.

“She’s a bit quiet.” Atsushi chuckled scratching the back of his neck. Gin playfully glared.

“Thank god I can only handle Hinata and Kuroo’s sunshine madness.” Kenma said suddenly startling the poor white haired boy.

“Where are you taking my sister?” Akutagawa asked.

“To play video games.” Kenma answer.

“Satisfactory. I have my phone on me if you need me.” And with that the protective brother left the four teens.

“Sorry about Ryu.” Gin said.

“He doesn’t like me.” Atsushi laughed. “To be fair I don’t like him either.”

“We know Kitty we know.”

“Seventeen hundred yen says they’re dating.” Ryoko says.

“Why bet when you know it’s true.” Fyodor added.

“Because it’s fun... and because Dazai doesn’t believe that Gin’s little kitty is our very own tiger, one touch.”

“Stop calling me that.” Fyodor grumbles.

“Stop calling me fire breath.” She counters.

“Fine Fukami.” The girl pouts.

“What happened to Ryoko are we back on last names Dostoevsky?”

Fyodor just hummed, an evil gleam in his eye.

“Training is at ten tonight. We should finish around one.”

A smirk formed on Ryoko’s face, maybe it was the dragon within, the grumbling warmth of a flame but she felt like being the annoying best friend to the one touch man of death. Guess she can show off just how strong she really is. She caught the eye of the Fukurodani Captain and waved. The boy seemed to glow happily as he chatted to his friend (Akaashi). He made a motion inviting her over to them.

Okay so she’ll be the annoying best friend after talking to who could probably be her male counterpart.

Yokohama is just here for some fun.

[imnotwolverine]

The marriage pact - Baby talk

Henry Cavill x OC Alice - multi-chapter

< Part 13 | Part 14 Baby talk | Part 15 >

Disclaimer: reference to doing the naughty 🤭

Author’s note: Since I’m both on a wild writing spree and quite terrible at fixing my own grammatical errors / checking on word flow..do I maybe, just maybe, have some fic-readers on here who’d like to proof read my material before I post it? Anyone? There’s some 10-ish chapters left on this story, in case you wish to know how much work that’d be. Greetings from my writing nook! 🤓❤️

Word count: 1.349

(Link to my Masterlist)

Dear readers,

It is a time of many new beginnings, including the start of a search for a place of my own.

“Why move?” You may due-fully ask, to which I’ll answer; “Well, I need some darn privacy, okay?!”

Now, please do know that I definitely do not wish to nag. In fact my current living arrangement isn’t half as bad as I first presumed it would be. My parents are adorable people and my room hadn’t changed a bit since I left; and it sure is comfortable. Besides, it’s rather nice to have family around and be in a house full with life and laughter, the kitchen always smelling of freshly baked cakes and cookies, the living room buzzing with my dad’s classic rock.

But, being 37 and having a decent paying job and cares and wishes of my own, it simply is time for me to spread my wings and rebuild a life elsewhere. Which, once again, appears to be more difficult than I wished it to be, because apparently nice apartments are sparse on the Channel Islands.

Do you want more than a tiny shack which barely fits your bed and a dining table for four? Then you better have a fat check book or a whole lotta luck.

So yes, in my case; luck it is. Would you cross some fingers for me again?

Much appreciated,

Ali

‘Ooodoo-doo-doo.’ I cooed, squishing Kal’s furry cheeks between my grabby hands, the dog happily wagging his tail as Henry took the moment to clip a leash onto the Akita’s sturdy collar.

‘Going for a walk!’ Henry yelled into the back of the house, his parents probably enjoying some elevenses on the back porch, the grand seaside house quiet. Henry shrugged as no response came, his smiling face beaming at me. ‘Alright then, let’s go.’

Kal barked in excitement, jumping on all fours as I pulled open the front door, the morning breeze welcoming us with hot restless licks. Like it had become near custom, I would hook my hand around Henry’s arm, our footfalls perfectly in tune as we walked down the road, our eyes aimlessly wandering over the silver blue waves. It was nice like this. Simple, but nice.

‘Did you tell your parents about your plans to move yet?’ Henry asked, his voice near lost in the seaside wind that slapped us in the face - the beach was getting nearer.

‘Not really. You know how my mom is; she can get a bit overdramatic.’ I smiled, seeing the beach was quite busy this morning. Many children running cheerfully through the surf of the sea, their feet followed by equally cheerful women waddling with large, rounded bellies, promising even more to come. More children. More happy feet trailing through the wet sand.

Thankfully I wasn’t alone in my quiet stares, Henry squeezing my hand even closer to his chest, offering me a silent but affirmative; “I know, Ali, I can see it too.”

I sighed quietly and tugged on Henry’s arm, leading us down the sandy dunes until we reached a wood logged path, offering us some steady footing instead of having to work our way through the muggy sand. 

Kal happily sniffed around, making our pace far slower as we waited up for the dog every other step or so. ‘So how are you today?’ I asked, looking at Henry as he focused on Kal sniffing through some long dune grass. He clicked his tongue when the dog got a little over-excited, his nose digging into the plant. ‘Okay for now. Though not really looking forward to picking up travelling again. I mean. There’s some fun bits, but it’s also nice to be out here with…’ His voice trailed off as he looked at me with large loving eyes, the rest of his words unspoken. He smiled simply, satisfaction clear on his shaved cheeks.

‘I’ll miss having you around.’ I smiled, far less satisfied and more worried. Would this be the end of our little fling-thing again?

‘I don’t want this to end Ali.’ He said, halting us both and looking into my eyes, trusting Kal wouldn’t be digging up dirty diapers for this one important moment. ‘As much as I appreciate you telling me you’ll miss me..I don’t want that to be necessary. I hate it. And I’ll do anything in my power to prevent this from going south again. We’ve had enough practise now. Let’s..’ He licked his lips, locking hopeful eyes with mine. ‘..let’s make it work this time.’

—

Warm, strong fingers wrapped around mine, the doctor peering at us from over the tip of her glasses, her curious eyes studying Henry perhaps just a bit too much. Sure, it was not everyday that this superstar sinks down in your chair, because he and his ..eh..partner..want to learn about planned parenthood at a later age.

I had been rather quiet through-out the visit, having heard most of the info before, but Henry seemed to be more than a little prepared, asking a gazillion questions. He had been most excited when I had hesitantly proposed he could join me and now here we were. Once again in this tiny doctor’s office, the desk before us filled with leaflets and my notebook which Henry now eagerly used to jot down points we still needed to research.

We. Us. Me and him.

The very idea seemed so very surreal, that I was growing increasingly worried that we were in fact just continuing to build this crazy fantasy. Sure, we might be a good sexual fit. Sure, we were good at talking. Sure, we had quite a few shared hobbies and enjoyed the same things, wanted the same things. But what we didn’t have just yet was time together. And that is where I got a little anxious. I was not made for long distance relationships. I needed physicality, I needed HIM. And no matter what he’d do, it was more than likely that distance would come in between us.

But that was a concern for another moment.

Now we were here to talk babies. BABIES! Kids. Pups. Off-spring. Mini-me’s. And maybe, very maybe, mini-Henry’s. But we were yet to come to a decision on that. First we wanted to know all available options and discuss it thoroughly. We were together for one and a half month now. That was..nothing. That was…

His fingers squeezed more tightly around mine and I looked up, meeting those deep, warm ceruleans of his. ‘Looks like we have plenty to work through.’ He said, his voice surprisingly dark..almost..husky. Was he ..eh..aroused? I blinked for a moment, then quickly steered my attention back towards the doctor, who didn’t seem to miss the subtle hints that he sent my way. She raised a careful, slightly amused eyebrow, trying her best to keep a professional look on her face.

‘Yea..thanks again Doctor.’ I nodded, making sure we’d get out of there before he’d decide to ravish me right there on that tiny desk.

—

By the time we got to his parents place there was no time left for formalities - and how glad I was that his parents were out to visit some of their friends on that particular moment. We barely made it to the couch, our desperate hands tugging on clothes, lips firing heated kisses, no words or actual talk managing to get past our lips. 

It was more than a little apparent, that of all things that we were good at doing together, THIS was definitely one of them. As practised as our morning walks on the beach, so practised were our fingers as they dragged over hot, shivering skin, aching to be touched. 

‘We really need to..talk.’ I panted, feeling his hot breath in my neck, his five-a-clock shadow rubbing deliciously on my skin. ‘L-l.’ Henry groaned. ‘..Later.’ He rumbled, already digging down his pocket for a condom. 

Now there was one and simple conclusion to be made here: of all things that could get Henry hot and bothered, family planning MOST DEFINITELY was one of them.

--

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[an-upset-librarian]

A Storm of Ice & Wind -- Part VI

As Nesta and Cassian travel North, they talk about the path that brought them together. 

At long last, I humbly bring before you all an update to this little Nessian story of mine. Nothing like a quarantine to get things started, huh? I hope you enjoy this little chapter! 

As always, if you want to be added/removed from the update tag list, let me know! I just copy/paste and I know it has been a while since I updated so...

AO3

I    II    III    IV    V

PART VI

             Thankfully, Nesta held back her surprised scream when Cassian quickly thrust up into the sky with his powerful wings. The drum beat of his wings drowned out the panicked pounding of her heart, but as soon as they cleared the canopy and reached open air, Nesta’s fear was replaced with childlike wonder.

            She’d never paid any attention when she flew before. Never really wanted to open her eyes and look at the world from the new perspective. How stupid she’d been.

            Her breath misted in the chilled air, the early rays of the sun catching it and casting a golden light upon her every exhale. She blinked against the glaring sun as it slowly peeked out from behind the wall of mountains spanning in nearly every direction. She looked down and the forest was only a dark blur beneath them. Washes of greens and browns and snow mixed together until she couldn’t distinguish one tree from another.

            The sky was a brilliant canvas around them. The dawn blushed into life around them, highlighting the clouds and emphasizing the creeping darkness of night as it faded away. Oranges and pinks streaked the sky and clouds. Nesta was in complete and utter awe. They were high enough that she felt as though she could reach out and touch the fluffy clouds around them. A gentle breeze washed through her plaited hair and pinched at her cheeks. She felt as though she was living inside one of Feyre’s paintings.

            The thought of her sister dampened her mood, but not as much as she would have expected. Flying above the canopy, enveloped in the painted sunrise filled her with tranquility, something she had not felt in quite a while.

            A smile lit her face and she nearly forgot who was carrying her when she tightened her grip around Cassian’s neck. The overwhelming sense of smugness exuding from her companion’s pores quickly reminded her of who she was with. He was watching her with mirth in his dark gaze, an all too self-satisfied smirk tugging at the corner of his lips.

            The itching of her power under her skin faded to the back of her mind as she took in the great landscape beneath her and the skies around her. Nesta saw why Cassian loved to fly, why all Illyrians loved to fly. And what a punishment it was to clip female’s wings to keep them from experiencing such freedom.

            They were silent for the first half hour or so. Cassian focused on his flying and the trials they would face ahead, and Nesta relishing in the calmness flying brought her and the clarity she could almost reach. Before she knew it, she was relaxing in Cassian’s arms, the stress she’d felt about her magic and her overwhelming emotions fading with each wingbeat.

            While the air was frigid, it was a blessing against her hot, irritated skin. The brisk bite of the cold wind on her cheeks and her hands distracted her from the waves of power boiling inside of her. She knew she had to talk to Cassian about it, see if he could help, but her damned pride was still intact even after months of living as a shell of the person she used to be. Though, the person she used to be was stubborn and prideful as well.

            Maybe that person was still inside her, a foundation for the pieces she was trying to put together again.

            She lost track of time, lost in the beauty that surrounded her and the comfort of the arms around her and the body against her. It wasn’t until Cassian spoke, jolting her from her peaceful reverie, that she remembered their goals and what brought them to flying further North.

            “I needed this,” he said, his eyes filled with rare softness. Nesta nodded. She could see the stress leave his shoulders, like a weight was lifted, and the ease in his movements. His arms tightened around her as he breathed in the cold air. “After Hybern, when that bastard shredded my wings-” Nesta tensed in his arms, memories rising to the surface.

            “A part of me thought I’d never be able to do this again, to fly above Illyria with the winter winds against my wings and the sun on my skin.” His brow furrowed. Nesta wondered if it was the bubble that surrounded them, high above the ground with nothing but the clouds for company, that brought up such vulnerability. She felt it too, a tender and fragile part of her heart seemed to light up at his words.

            “I remember,” she started, “seeing you bandaged. I could see it, the determination to be fully healed but behind that I saw your fear too. And I felt it within me. I was in a body I couldn’t recognize with abilities I never thought possible, Elain was-well, she was Elain. Feyre was gone and so was my home.” That piece of her heart swelled with emotion and she felt the tether tying her to the male that held her grow taut. His thumb stroked her shoulder and he stared into her eyes with no hesitation or fear, only understanding. “I remember seeing you relearning how to fly. I wanted you to win that fight.” She met his gaze head on.

            “I wanted revenge, justice, whichever. I wanted one of us to come out of that cursed castle stronger and unchanged.” She clenched her jaw and exhaled a hard breath of air. “But that revenge came at a price. One I don’t know if I can pay.” The memories of the Cauldron and the King that wielded it came rushing back.

            The feeling of that cold water against her skin, the image of Cassian, broken and unconscious, crawling towards her as she fought and screamed. And what came after-when she was inside that ancient thing. The darkness that surrounded her and what she saw inside of it, what she stole. That darkness lived in her now.

            “Some burdens stay with us, like scars that don’t heal right, or broken bones that don’t set. There are wounds of the mind that can’t be healed, only patched over. I know, I have a couple. Knowing that I wasn’t strong enough, despite what these damned Siphons grant me, that I wasn’t enough to save your or your sister, it is the greatest wound I shall ever bear. Deeper than all the shit I did during the war so many centuries ago, or even the war we just survived.” Cassian’s voice was thick with emotion. His arms tightened to the point of pain, but she didn’t say anything, couldn’t say anything. She could only listen, as he did for her.

            “I saw what happened to you, what you went through and I stayed away because I thought it would be best, Nesta.” Her name was honey on his lips, and she leaned in like a honeybee drawn to a flower’s nectar. His face was mere inches from hers and she could feel the heat of his breath fan across her face. She could see the golden flecks in his eyes shining in the sunlight.

            “I wish things could have been different for you, but they weren’t. You were dealt a shit hand and you’re trying your best; I can see that now. I know it isn’t easy. I know.” For once, Nesta actually believed he did know, that he did understand. That he could understand, somehow, the pain she felt. Their scars were different, but if she could recognize those marks on his soul then he could see hers. Another piece of herself fell into place as she stared into his eyes, as she felt his pain and saw his empathy. She took a shaky breath and cupped her hands around his face. They were hovering, almost, in the sky together. Locked in their bubble together.

            “I see you too, Cassian.” She pressed her forehead against his and felt him shudder. A sense of ease and comfort overcame her. It was so easy to be close to him, to be vulnerable with him. In the bubble, she didn’t care about her pride or her wounds that refused to heal. Cassian murmured her name, as if saying a prayer and for once she wanted to answer that call of devotion, without thinking about what it could mean.

            “I-” she stuttered, too afraid to finish.

            “I know,” he answered.

            She thought about the first time they met, when she was still human, and the war seemed like something impossible happening in an impossible place. How she judged those that accompanied her sister. So much has changed, but now it felt right. The thread that connected her to Cassian was singing. It wrapped around her chest and brought warmth and something she never thought she could feel. Its melody was familiar and welcoming, and she was being drawn into its dance. Nesta felt Cassian’s breath against her lips. She thumbed the slight stubble on his jaw and took a deep breath.

            She felt his lips brush against hers and was instantly reminded of the last time she felt his lips on hers, when they faced certain death together as that King walked towards them. Nesta jerked back.

            She heard it again, the snap of her father’s bones. She saw it, his crumpled form. Saw Cassian’s broken wings and body against the earth, looking at her with such grief and loss. All at once, those feelings that dwelled inside her that had been calm since they took off into the skies returned. Her heartbeat sped up and the power inside of her stretched and bared its teeth.

            Nesta pushed against Cassian as the panic set into her bones, nestling besides her pieced together heart. She could hear his voice, a few curses and some attempt at calming words but she couldn’t hear his words. Couldn’t focus. All she could hear was that Cauldron damned snap. All she could feel was the memory of his lips against hers, the salty taste of his tears and the desperation they both shared.

            She couldn’t be here, in his arms and thinking of kissing him. Not when her father was dead, her life forever changed and destroyed, her family lost to her. She couldn’t think, couldn’t focus. There was only the panicked sense of danger that filled every fiber of her being.

            That ancient power inside her relished in her roiling emotions. It took advantage of the brief loss of control she had and lashed out. Her skin was crawling and cold. Nesta’s muscles trembled and despite knowing she was hundreds of feet in the air, the power inside of her wrought havoc. It filled her blood and danced across her skin. She wanted to cling to Cassian, to pull him close and have him tell her everything would be okay, but that power was all consuming. Before she even knew what was happening, her body was finally free of his warm but confining arms.

            And Nesta fell.

------------------------------

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[dontasktheradiodemon]

DM chat log Sept 9

Alastor uses his newfound freedom on the blog to check up on @hiss-and-vinegar, and they continue to break new records on the enemies-to-friends speedrun, look at them go, amazing.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 You've certainly had an interesting couple of days, my friend.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 AH, ALASTOR.

🐍 YES, I HAVE. I FEEL A MIGRAINE CREEP UP EVERY FEW HOURS!

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 I can't say I'm surprised! He's a walking headache. And that's just when he hasn't been invited to stick his nonexistent nose into someone's business by an overidealistic busybody.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 I'VE DECIDED TO STAY WITH VALERA FOR A FEW DAYS, THE LAST PLACE I WANT TO BE IS IN THAT BOILER ROOM.

🐍 CHARLOTTE CERTAINLY DID NOT HELP MATTERS, BUT HERE WE ARE.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Here we are! And there you are. No Vox News paparazzi in her neck of the woods, I suppose.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 NO, BUT I CAN'T HELP BUT FEEL LIKE A, COWARD

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 And he's probably counting on that. But even I don't deal with him! I ignore the hell out of him! If you weren't already doing so yourself, I would have recommended it.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 YOU DID NOT IGNORE HIM THE OTHER DAY.

🐍 ALTHOUGH, I REALLY WASN'T EXPECTING THAT!

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 It was not him that I was paying attention to.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 CHARLOTTE, I KNOW.

🐍 I STILL HAD NOT EXPECTED YOU TO SAY ANYTHING.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 What's a radio good for if not commenting on the news? And I hadn't noticed anyone else pointing out that her entire claim was...

🎶 ... appallingly stupid.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 IT WAS

🐍 I WAS SURPRISED THAT SHE WOULD STOOP TO SOMETHING AS LOW AS TAKING CREDIT FOR SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

🐍 IF SHE WANTS TO BE AN INNOVATOR, STEALING CREDIT IS NOT GOING TO GET HER ANYWHERE!

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 It took me quite by surprise too! Despite her naïveté, apparently her veneer of wholesomeness doesn't go as deep as I expected. Under different circumstances, this would have been the exact sort of fiasco I'd have hoped for out of her little project.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 MM, YES. I IMAGINE SO

🐍 UGH, TEXT LIKE THIS IS SO IMPERSONAL.

🐍 I WANTED TO SAY,.

🐍 THANK YOU... OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Oh!

🎶 You're welcome.

🎶 No, words scrolling along like movie credits aren't terribly personal, are they.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 I IMAGINE WE OUGHT TO BE LYING FRONT FIRST ON OUR RESPECTIVE BEDS, KICKING OUR LEGS OR TAILS AS WE SEND EACH OTHER TEXTS!!!

🐍 BUT I AM NOT A TEENAGER

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Then I'll pretend I'm sitting upright like the solemn adult we all know I am!

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 HA!

🐍 YOU WOULD KICK YOUR LEGS IN A FRILLY MANNER

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 I'd prefer to call it "energetic"! No reason we should both be dignified, I'll let you cover that for us both.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 NYA HA HA!!! YOU SHOULD! I AM MUCH BETTER AT IT THAN YOU ARE!

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Always a jester, never a king. But! Who am I if I'm not entertaining?

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 And speaking of entertaining!

🎶 I've spent all day wondering whether you're planning any response for this insult.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 ... SOMETHING STRATEGIC, YOU MEAN?

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 If you have non-strategic ideas, I'm all ears! But yes, that was what I was most curious about.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 I DO NOT. HAVE ANY PLANS.

🐍 AT THIS POINT IN TIME.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Really!

🎶 Very well then!

🎶 Is it too soon to ask to be kept in the loop if that changes?

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 I SUPPOSE NOT, THOUGH I FEEL RATHER AT A DISADVANTAGE. SHOULD I ATTEMPT ANY ATTACKS ON HIM, HE WILL TROUNCE ME. IT IS SHAMEFUL TO ADMIT THAT, BUT. I SHOULD NOT BE AS RECKLESS AS BEFORE.

🐍 ANOTHER REASON FOR THIS VACATION, I SWEAR BEING IN THE BASEMENT FOR SO LONG HAS CLIPPED MY WINGS.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Well, I didn't want to be the one to say it! But there are very few people he can't trounce.

🎶 Believe you me, I would be absolutely delighted to see you crush him into so much silicon dust!

🎶 But not before that's the guaranteed outcome.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 SO THEN WHAT IS IT YOU WANT OUT OF THIS CONVERSATION? A LACK OF DIRECTNESS CAN BE GREATLY FRUSTRATING, ALASTOR

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Terribly sorry, force of habit.

🎶 I wanted to know if you were going to try anyway. If you were, I was going to persuade you to defer that attack.

🎶 If I couldn't dissuade you, I was going to invite myself along.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 AH. WELL, DO NOT WORRY, APPARENTLY MY HELL'S ALASTOR ALSO HOPED TO DISSUADE ME SIMILARLY. ALTHOUGH I DIDN'T BELIEVE HIM AT ALL, HE'S ALWAYS WANTING ME TO FAIL.

🐍 I WOULD HAVE ASSUMED YOU WERE TRYING TO GET ME TO ATTACK VOX TOO HAD IT NOT BEEN FOR HIS MESSAGES...

🐍 A LETTER WOULD HAVE PULLED OUT YOUR HONESTY, ALASTOR. A LITTLE BLOODLETTING.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Well, aren't myself and I lucky? Surround sound sound advice!

🎶 I didn't want to state my position without knowing yours! You can hardly blame me for that.

🎶 Although if you'd like a letter and a little blood, I'm happy to provide either.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 I REALLY AM SO PREDICTABLE, THAT THE RADIO DEERMEN MUST IMMEDIATELY TRY TO RESTRAIN ME FROM MY JUSTIFIABLE IRE.

🐍 AND NOW I AM BEING MONITORED, AND ALL OF HELL WAS REMINDED OF THAT DAY I FELL FROM BEING AN OVERLORD.

🐍 I WANT BLOOD, YES. BUT NOT YOURS. AND SHOULD I DWELL ON THIS MUCH LONGER, I MAY BE LIKELY TO WANT MY OWN!!!

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Come now, it's not so bad as all that. I wouldn't call you predictable, I'd

You'd like directness?

🎶 The plain truth of the matter is there are very few things that frighten me, and he's one of them.

🎶 And I'm sure my other me feels the same, not that you can ever tell him I told you so.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 WHAT CAN YOU SWEAR ON SO THAT I KNOW THIS IS NOT A BIT?

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 I swear on my mother's grave, he terrifies me.

🎶 Will that do? I know it's cliche, but.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 IT WILL DO.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 I DO NOT REALLY KNOW WHAT TO SAY, ALASTOR. I DID NOT EXPECT YOU TO SAY THIS TO ME, TO TRUST ME LIKE THIS.

🐍 I AM ABLE TO SEE HOW I'VE CHANGED, JUST FROM THE FEELING THAT SWAM THROUGH MY VEINS UPON READING IT.

🐍 IT IS HARD. FOR ME TO ADMIT MY WEAKNESS. IT IS HARD FOR ME TO GIVE UP.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Not a feeling of nausea, I hope.

🎶 Ha! You and me both. If you think you've changed, imagine something as preposterous as the Radio Demon admitting to a fear.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 BUT I AM... ALSO AFRAID. AFRAID OF BEING ERASED, BUT ALSO OF BEING BURIED AND FORGOTTEN.

🐍 AND AFRAID OF NOT BEING HERE WHEN I AM NEEDED. EVERYONE HAS THEIR EXPECTATIONS OF ME, AND NOW, I AM AFRAID TO ACT ON THEM.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 I doubt anyone has expectations of me. Not ones I have any interest in living up to, anyway.

🎶 But being forgotten?

🎶 I didn't go into radio because I wanted to maintain a low profile.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 NO, OF COURSE NOT

🐍 I DO NOT WANT TO MAINTAIN A LOW PROFILE EITHER!!! I JUST DO NOT HAVE ANY IDEAS OF HOW TO DEAL WITH VOX

🐍 I AM FRUSTRATED BY MY LACK OF VISION

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 I'm a decent shot with a hunting rifle!

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 But all joking aside—I don't know about your universe, but in mine it took him over fifty years to climb to where he is now. He's powerful, he's connected, and he's entrenched.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 I fully believe that you can take him down. But I'm not expecting it to happen in a month.

10/01/2020

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 HE TOOK THE TERRITORY I LOST WHEN I WAS REMOVED FROM POWER, AND IT DIDN'T HAPPEN OVERNIGHT, BUT IT WAS CERTAINLY IMPRESSIVE. I DID NOT HAVE THE WHEREWITHAL TO TAKE IT BACK.

🐍 BUT NO, I CANNOT AFFORD TO RUSH IN.

🐍 DOING SO WOULD SET ME BACK, AND, I HAVE VALERA TO THINK ABOUT.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 I watched the same thing happen over here. It didn't all go to him, but enough did. Factories, warehouses full of raw materials, et cetera. He's only where he is now because he was lucky enough to be in the right place when a better overlord took a tumble.

🎶 And I doubt that even he's too self centered to know that.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 MM. INDEED.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 So keep that in mind. He might be mocking you now, but unless he's too self-absorbed to see past his own glassy face, he remembers what you were—and he's worried that if he doesn't keep you down, you might be again.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 MAKES SENSE. AGREEABLE, ALASTOR.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Is it just me, or are you getting less talkative? So sorry, I do have a tendency to ramble on, don't I!

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 NO, IT ISN'T YOU.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 I WANT TO THANK YOU FOR SPEAKING TO ME ON THIS MATTER. AS I SAID, THIS METHOD FEELS... IMPERSONAL. THERE IS A CERTAIN LACK OF INTEGRITY, OR, SOMETHING

🐍 IT FEELS BLAND. MAYBE I SHOULD...

🐍 Write like this for a little while.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 I do not know where I'd be right now, or how I would be handling this entire ordeal without Valera and your company.

🐍 Thank you, my dear friend.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 You're quite welcome, my snake friend!

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 It's a good thing you've got Valera around now! Plenty of fish in the sea and all that, but my, few as remarkable as that one.

🎶 But any time Valera isn't available, you've also got me now.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 I'll keep that in mind, truly.

🐍 Well I grow eager to work on my projects, so I will let you go for now, Alastor. THERE'S MUCH TO BE DONE AND I WANT TO TEST OUT MY LAPTOP COMPUTER

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 I'll be looking forward to seeing what comes out of your workshop next!

[taiblogcomics]

Anger Fueled by Diesel

Hey there, staircases that have rotted through. I hope your Thanksgiving's good, if that's a thing you care about and celebrate. If not, I hope your Thursday's good, at least. Probably won't be after you read this review, though, since we're doing another of the New 52's Teen Titans this week~

Here's the cover:

Oh boy, this cover. Should I reference "The Power" by Snap? Should I reference that one Mega Man clip? So many possibilities with a cover caption this wordy. Also, here's Diesel. I hope this one isn't a JoJo ripoff. Actually, scratch that, I totally hope he is. Other than the fountain of jokes, though, this cover's pretty bad. Like, hold this out at arm's length and just kind of look at it. Can you even tell what's going on? It's just a lot of visual noise if you ask me.

The comic opens with a full page splash of Superboy. The captions declare that Superboy has been through some stuff, and you can tell this is true because he's currently going through a tree. Cassie apologises, explaining in a spooky voice that the longer she wears the "Silent Armor", the less control she has over her actions. She's also now going by Wonder Girl, even though all previous issues, she's thrown a hissy fit at being called that. That's how you know something's amiss with her.

Superboy's prepared to smash through her, but Tim Drake steps between them. Tim tries the "I know you're in there somewhere" tactic, which is already an unusual implication, because literally she's in there. That's how armour works, Tim. Regardless, Wonder Girl says she knows she's in here and can fight it. She's been fighting it the whole time, and she's tired of doing so now. Tim gives her the "I won't move unless you kill me" ultimatum, and she responds with "Kill it is, then". What a good plan. Fortunately, Superboy's there to rescue him as Wonder Girl begins punching up the place.

While they're doing that, we switch over to a roadside motel in New Jersey to see the rest of the Titans. Basically it's to let us know they'll be out of action for the duration of the storyline. Bunker's basically too weak to stand, and the other two are just content to listen to orders for now. After that, we rejoin where the fight continues, with Superboy tackling her enough to distract her while Tim gets in there and uses those nano-fiber wings on his costume to tear a hole in her armour. It's not anything significant, but it distracts her again so Superboy can do the actual plan of using his tactile telekinesis on her. It's sort of a double-nested distraction, I guess.

With the telekinesis surging over her, the armour is slowly and painfully removed from her. It's actually parasitic, and the spikes covering it are also on the inside, growing into her flesh. It's very unpleasant, is what I'm saying. Finally, though, it's fully ripped from Cassie, and she's free. And while she's recovering, that's when she looks up to see some dudebro sitting there, drawing the armour's energies into a little box. And oh boy, does this sequence suck, for basically one simple reason: show, don't tell.

See, the dudebro here is the Diesel as mentioned on the cover. And he and Cassie have a big history. A history that we've never seen, because of the reboot and this being his first appearance. A history that we never see because they don't give us a flashback or anything. They just talk their history at each other while Diesel powers up into the armour. It's very poor exposition. The gist of it is that Diesel is a stalkery asshole and wants Cassie to love him, while she rightly thinks he's a stalkery creep.

And now that stalkery creep has a magical set of pointy edgelord armour. It's not even gold and red on him like it is on Cassie, it's become a blue and silver number. Anyways, he blasts off with it, saying he's happy to be the harbinger of destruction if Cassie won't love him. Tim and Superboy are basically like "well, good riddance", and Cassie points out how stupid that is. Sure, she hates using the armour and it hurts like hell to even wear. But compare that to some stalkery asshole using it? The issue ends with her promising that if she doesn't get it back, a world will surely die.

We're not quite done yet, though. Remember that backup story? We've got another installment of that today. Turns out the backup stories this time and last are essentially prologue and epilogue for a story in DC Universe Presents #12, a comic which I do not own. You can kind of get the basics without it, though. The dinosaur-shaped teens are here from Mystery Island, and they want to turn the "Mammal World" into one for dinosaurs. Kid Flash has befriended one of them, a red-skinned youth in a beat-up hoodie named Teryx.

The story starts--or ends, I guess, since it's an epilogue--with Teryx about to be attacked by some lizardman-esque creature. Kid Flash shows up and delivers a beatdown to the beast, knocking it out and using some super high-tech manacles he "borrowed" from STAR Labs. The two part ways, with Teryx vowing to search the terrifying land of New Jersey for his former friends. And the story ends on those friends, with the one in a pterodactyl hoodie handing a snake to the other one, the leader named Steg. Steg pours chemicals on the snake, turning it into another lizardman, and vowing he'll still take over the world. So, given the caption of "Not the end!", this really isn't so much an epilogue as it is a teaser for a future story.

This issue is pretty bad. It sidelines all the likeable characters (and there’s so few of those to begin with) in favour of possibly the current least likeable member of the team. And the exposition is done so poorly. The tagline for the next issue promises to show how Cassie got the armour in the first place, but... Like, just show that in the first place. Then you wouldn’t need to spend two pages having her and Diesel just talk about events we never saw. It’s just so badly handled.

Worse yet, next week we won’t even see that story. No, there’s something else before that. But we’ll go into detail on that next time~

[searchingwardrobes]

Until the Day Breaks and the Shadows Flee: 1/8

Here it is, my second contribution to the @cssns! I am really excited about this one because the story of Cupid and Psyche is my favorite myth, and I’ve been contemplating this fic since we first heard of the Underworld arc. Since CS spends all their time in the dark and in bed, this ended up being the steamiest story I’ve ever written. It’s not smut (that’s what my beta and I concluded, anyway), but it goes right up to the line. I must warn you, however, that you’ll have to endure a few chapters of slow burn first. I hope you all enjoy it!

A thousand thank yous to my beta @snowbellewells who is graciously still doing her thing even though she just had to go back to work at her teaching job because I last minute decided to make this an MC. And thanks also to @hollyethecurious for the gorgeous artwork that really sums up this story so well!

Summary: Every night, she traces the contours of his body as Killian whispers words of love against her skin. But can Princess Emma ever be fully happy with a husband who only comes to her in utter darkness? A Captain Swan AU of the Roman myth of Cupid and Psyche.

** I’m also curious if anyone knows where the fic and chapter titles come from. Drop me and ask if you have a guess!**

Rating: M for sexual situations

Words: about 3,000 in this chapter

Also on Ao3

Tagging (let me know if you want to be added or removed from this list): @kday426 @jennjenn615 @welllpthisishappening @let-it-raines @kmomof4 @teamhook @bethacaciakay @profdanglaisstuff @shireness-says @wellhellotragic @distant-rose @mythologicalmango @optomisticgirl @xhookswenchx @branlovestowrite @ultraluckycatnd @vvbooklady1256 @resident-of-storybrooke @thislassishooked @whimsicallyenchantedrose @tiganasummertree @snidgetsafan @delirious-latenight-laughs @winterbaby89 @ohmakemeahercules @gingerchangeling @nikkiemms @revanmeetra87 @cocohook38

Chapter One: On the Rugged Mountain

The procession making its way down the streets of Misthaven was beautiful in a macabre sort of way. It was led by chanting priests in black hooded robes swinging orbs of burning incense. Behind them, Queen Snow and King David rode in an open carriage draped in black satin and drawn by a team of chestnut horses. They were both decked in mourning clothes of black, the queen’s face covered by a lace veil. Behind them was another carriage, this one drawn by two white horses. This one was closed, dark curtains pulled shut. Yet everyone knew who was inside, dressed in the wedding gown that should have been worn in celebration. The townspeople lowered their heads as it passed, some dabbing silently at their tears. Bringing up the rear of the procession were the ladies of the court, also dressed in garments of mourning. The only sounds apart from the clip-clop of the horses and the creaking of the carriage wheels came from them: deep wails of grief accompanied at times by the warbly singing of an old folk song about a maiden wed to death himself.

At the village gates, the priests and mourning maidens abandoned the procession, standing before a throng of villagers. The silence that had fallen amongst the people remained until the royal carriages crested a hill and were no longer in sight.

On these two carriages traveled, cloaked in silence. Even the king and queen were at a loss for words to comfort one another, and their daughter had requested to be left alone for the journey.

Finally, the carriages rumbled to a stop at the top of a misty hill. It was rumored to be filled with monsters and lesser gods and goddesses whose constant turmoil created the rumblings of thunder and flashes of lightning upon its peak.

King David helped his wife down from the carriage, then went to assist his daughter. Yet the door opened before he could lend his hand, and Emma alighted on her own, her face pale yet determined, her back straight.

“Emma,” her mother said, a sob rising in her throat, “you don’t have to do this.”

The princess’s stony expression softened slightly at her mother’s tears. “Yes, I do. What is my life compared to that of our entire kingdom?”

Snow let her tears go then, clasping her daughter in a desperate embrace. David enveloped both his girls, his hand coming up to cup the back of his daughter’s head. It seemed only yesterday he was rocking her to sleep after a midnight feeding. He kissed the top of her forehead before releasing her with a trembling smile, his eyes awash with tears.

Emma clasped the pure white fabric of her gown in both fists. “You know what the oracle said. You must leave me here alone.”

Snow practically collapsed in her husband’s arms as he led her away. Emma watched both royal carriages rumble back down the hill, her courage fleeing with them. Once they were out of sight completely, she fell in a heap upon the ground. She was surprised, however, when tears didn’t come. She supposed she’d had time to accept her fate.

The mist turned to a thick fog, and she wondered if she would die quickly before seeing the monster approach. She closed her eyes and awaited her “groom.” A virginal sacrifice to sate the hunger of a beast and save a kingdom. It was an old story, wasn’t it?

***************************************************

Emma had imagined many gruesome scenarios since she learned that she was destined to be the “bride” of a hideous creature. Yet in none of those tableaus had she imagined that she would get bored waiting for the damn thing to show up. Yet here she was, going out of her mind wondering how much time had passed. She curled up on the ground, using the long train of her dress as a makeshift pillow. She didn’t expect to sleep, but suddenly she was jolted awake by the hot sun on her face.

She sat up and rubbed her eyes, amazed to see the green hill, dotted with the most beautiful roses she had ever seen, and the sky bright and blue above her. The fog was rolling away, revealing such amazing beauty as it went. Then the fog revealed something even more unbelievable, and Emma’s jaw dropped.

Right before her was a huge, glittering castle. It was of white stone, with angels on every buttress and turret instead of gargoyles. Every bit of filigree and trim around its windows and doors was done in gold. Emma scrambled to her feet, in complete awe. As if the castle itself knew she was awake, its gates swung open. Emma hesitated for a moment, part of her wondering if she were still sleeping, and another part worrying that it was a trick, but a tug in her core seemed to pull her towards the castle.

She went through the open gates, marveling further at the beauty that surrounded her. A path of white marble cut through a garden filled with flowers of every hue. They seemed more vibrant than any Emma had ever seen, and butterflies and hummingbirds flitted around them by the dozens.

Just like the gates, the doors of the castle swung open of their own accord. Emma made her way up steps also of pure white marble. The marble extended into the foyer of the castle, yet as the door gently closed behind her, the feeling enveloping her was one of warmth. Despite the cool stone beneath her feet, the wooden banister of the spiral staircase was a comforting mahogany, and the plush furnishings made her long to curl up and take a nap.

“Hello?” she called out tentatively.

In response, Emma heard giggling and childlike chatter.

“You were supposed to greet her at the door!”

“Well, you were supposed to be watching from the second floor balcony.”

“Hush, both of you, you’ll scare her!”

At first, Emma couldn’t figure out where the voices were coming from. Then she noticed glittering balls of colored light bouncing and floating all around her. If the accompanying voices hadn’t sounded so delightful, she might have been frightened.

The orbs began to grow and lengthen, and Emma could make out three distinct colors: green, purple, and red. Then she was able to see wings, then the tiny creatures attached to them.

“Fairies!” Emma exclaimed with a smile.

The orbs faded, and then three young women were delicately landing upon the marble floor in front of her. The first had blonde hair like Emma’s, pulled into a loose bun on the top of her head. Her dress looked as if it were made of green leaves.

“I’m Tinkerbell,” she said with a curtsy, “and I take care of the flowers in the garden and will also be your cook.”

The second fairy had long dark hair plaited in two braids, an olive colored complexion, and large brown eyes. Her dress was made of soft deerskin dyed with indigo and decorated with intricate beading.

“I’m Tiger Lily, and we all take care of the flowers, Tink.”

Emma bit her lip to keep from laughing at the dark haired fairy’s obvious irritation with the blonde.

The red-head giggled fondly at her fellow fairies, then addressed Emma. “I am Ariel, and I am to be your chambermaid.” Then she gasped and lowered into a deep curtsy. “I mean, your majesty.”

Emma’s mouth dropped open in surprise as the other two fairies curtsied as well. “I, I don’t understand -”

“We are here to wait upon you,” Tiger Lily explained, “at our master’s command.”

“Your . . . master?”

“Of course!” Tink exclaimed, clapping her hands merrily, “You are his bride, after all.”

Dread flooded through Emma’s veins. Being sacrificed to a monster was one thing, actually being married to one was quite another. She swallowed the bile rising in her throat.

“And . . . who is your master?”

Ariel giggled, and Emma was suddenly weary of the blonde and redhead’s exuberance. At least Tiger Lily seemed more sedate.

“We can’t tell you that!” Ariel exclaimed, as if it were a silly question.

Tiger Lily reached out and grasped Emma’s hands. “You are home now, m’lady, that is all you need know. All will be provided for you; anything and everything your heart desires.”

“But,” she bit upon her lower lip, “when will I meet my . . . husband?” She tried not to choke on the word.

For the first time, Tink looked solemn. “You won’t see him much, I’m afraid. He has many responsibilities. He is away from the castle now, and he gave no word of when he would be back.”

Emma frowned and pulled her hands out of Tiger Lily’s grip. “What kind of being is he? A cyclops? A chimera? What?”

All three fairies burst into giggles - apparently Tiger Lily could be silly too - and without answering, they transformed back into pixies. They dipped and swirled as they darted around Emma’s head in a most annoying fashion.

“Whatever you wish to eat will be served in the dining hall,” Tink’s voice called out.

Emma sighed as the fairies disappeared. She hugged her middle and did a cautious turn, taking in her ornate, exquisitely lovely surroundings. Well, she was hungry, and pork chops with gravy and roasted potatoes would really hit the spot . . .

Scarcely were the thoughts formed when she smelled something delicious down the hallway at the east end of the castle. She followed it, easily finding the dining hall, spread with a feast of all her favorite foods. She wondered for a moment if it could be poisoned, but her growling stomach won out in the end and she sat down to pile her plate high.

Even captive Princesses forced into marriages with beasts had to eat, after all.

************************************************************************

Ariel chattered excitedly as she showed Emma around her new chambers. They were gorgeous, Emma had to admit, with a large, ornate bed surrounded by exquisite tapestries. Emma longed to draw them around her and sink into the inviting bed piled high with soft pillows.

“Now this,” Ariel said, flitting across the room, “is the master’s favorite part.”

She flung open the French doors that lead out onto a spacious balcony, but Emma latched onto a single word. Her heart plummeted, and the last thing she cared about was a balcony with a view.

“The master’s? This . . . these are his chambers?”

Ariel turned to face her, head tilted innocently. “Of course. I mean . . . they are yours now, too. Yours and his. The . . . marital suite?”

The fairy was wringing her hands now, her face slightly pale. She turned to shut the French doors and pulled yet another tapestry across it. Avoiding Emma’s gaze, she went about the room lighting several candelabra. Then she opened the wardrobe, pulled out a long satin gown and laid it out on the bed.

“So the master will be sleeping here as well? That’s what you’re saying?” Emma demanded, stepping close to Ariel.

Her maid turned slowly to face her. “Yes. I mean, he is your husband after all.”

Emma clasped her hands together as they began to shake and took in a deep breath. She would not succumb to fear now, not when her kingdom was in danger. She released the air in her lungs and tried to force her pulse to slow.

“And when shall he return?”

Ariel shook her head, a look of apology upon her face. “I’m sorry, but one can never tell.” She bit her lip for a moment, then smiled encouragingly at Emma as she grasped her hands. “You have nothing to fear, Princess, I promise you.”

Easy for a fairy to say, Emma thought dryly. She wasn’t sharing a bed with . . . whatever the master was.

“Is there anything else I can get you?” Ariel asked.

“No. I just wish to be alone.”

As soon as Ariel’s footsteps faded out into the hallway, Emma sank onto the bed, finding it just as soft and inviting as she had imagined. She lay sideways, curled in on herself, eyeing the satin gown disdainfully. The cloth looked light as air and far more comfortable than the wedding gown she still wore, yet it had thin ribbons for straps and a plunging neckline, clearly a garment meant for seduction. She simply wouldn’t wear it.

Try as she might, however, she couldn’t get comfortable in her cumbersome gown. Frustrated, she leapt up and stomped over to the wardrobe. Inside, she found a collection of beautiful gowns, and in the back, a collection of nightgowns. She grumbled when she found that they were all in the same style, simply in different colors. Black, red, and pink didn’t seem any better than white, so she returned to the bed and began removing her dress. As she struggled with the corset, she wished she had asked Ariel for her help after all, but eventually she was slipping the simple satin garment over her head. It slid against her bare skin deliciously, and Emma sighed in contentment. She crossed over to the vanity and removed the crown of flowers pinned in her hair, running her fingers through her long locks.

A shiver ran down her spine as she crawled into the giant bed, pulling three of the four tapestries closed. On the open side, she kept the last candelabra burning, the encroaching darkness causing panic to crawl across her skin. She slipped beneath the covers, hoping against hope that the master wouldn’t be returning for their “wedding night.”

He didn’t even bother to see me in my wedding dress, Emma thought sarcastically to herself. She started to laugh bitterly, but then an image rose in her brain of being chased through the halls of the castle by a lust-enraged dragon or minotaur, and it turned into a hysterical half-sob.Then the blood froze in her veins at a creaking sound on the other side of the closed tapestries. Did someone just enter through the balcony doors?

The lights in the candelabra by her bed burned lower in an unnatural way, and Emma’s pulse quickened. She scrambled to the head of the bed, fisting the sheets and blankets at her chin. Was this when the monster would come? Had he been toying with her all this time?

A rush of air blew through the room, extinguishing all the light. The tapestries around the bed, which had seemed so luxurious when she first entered the chamber, now felt like heavy walls trapping her in. She held her breath, straining to hear, but it was useless against the pounding of her heart. She sensed his presence more than anything when he reached the bed, and she squeezed her eyes shut. Not that it made a difference in the pitch-black room.

“I won’t lay a hand on you.” His voice was deep, yet gentle.

Emma opened her eyes but still didn’t relax her posture. “I find that difficult to believe considering this,” she swallowed around the lump in her throat, “is our wedding night.”

She felt the bed dip and pulled her feet up hastily.

“Believe it or not, I speak the truth. You can trust me.”

Emma squinted in the darkness, trying to see his face.

“You won’t be able to see me,” he told her calmly.

“Then how can you expect me to trust you?” she shot back, unable to keep the frustration from her voice.

He surprised her by chuckling in a low, warm tone.

She licked her dry lips. “What kind of monster are you?”

“I’m not a monster,” he answered simply.

She eased forward hesitantly. “Then you’re human?”

“I . . . didn’t say that either.” She heard him pull in a deep breath. “Listen, all you need know is that you are safe and the plague that was ravishing your kingdom is over.”

Emma bit her lower lip. “But you expect something in return?”

“The only thing I ask is what you are willing to give.”

Emma fell back on her pillows in exasperation. “You speak in riddles just like the oracle!”

There was that chuckle again. “They do like to be mysterious, don’t they?”

Now that she was lounging upon her pillows, Emma released the sheets from her grip as well. “So what are we doing, exactly? You say you won’t touch me, so why are you here?”

“You are still my bride, that much is true, and like any groom, I wish to get to know you.”

“Most grooms do that before the wedding.”

He laughed again, and the sound was actually becoming relaxing. She wriggled down beneath the covers and attempted to stifle a yawn.

“You’ve had a long day,” he said gently. “How about tomorrow night you tell me a bit about yourself?”

Emma hesitated, her body tensing involuntarily. As if he could see her reaction, he hastily spoke again.

“Rest assured, I will not touch you without your consent. Ever.”

Emma swallowed, wanting to believe him, but unsure if she should. “Okay, I suppose tomorrow night we can talk. On one condition?”

He hesitated, and it sounded as if he were clearing his throat. “Within reason. That’s all I can promise you.”

“Tell me your name.”

She could literally hear his body sag in relief. And was it possible to hear someone smile?

“That is easy, love. Please call me Killian.”

“Killian,” she repeated, almost testing it on her tongue. “I like it.”

“I rather fancy it myself.” Yes, he was definitely smiling.

A pleasant breeze blew through the tapestries, and then the candles flickered back to life. Her new husband was gone.

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

17. What is a (deadly poisonous plant?) doing in a freezer with vetinari/downey

It’s all because of thisunnecessary paranoia of the commander. Downey thinks the man should see someoneabout that. Paranoia has its place but if you rest too long in that country itwill be your undoing. On second thought, perhaps the commander ought to rest inhis land of paranoia a while longer yet. If he went fully mad and had to belocked up it’d one less nuisance for Downey to deal with and he deals with agreat many nuisances.

‘For the last time, yourgrace,’ he smiles at the commander’s scowl. ‘We had nothing to do with thedeath of this unfortunate fellow.’

‘He was found poisoned,with a cross-bow bolt through his neck, along with signs of asphyxiation.’

‘Dear me.’

‘The poison has beenfound to be oleander.’

Downey raises eyebrows. He suggests the wife or family members, in case the commander needs help.

‘She has an alibi.’

‘Does he have siblings?Cousins? Disgruntled household staff?’

‘Are you telling me howto do my job?’ Vimes snarls.

‘Since you’re here, andyou know we do not inhume without leaving a receipt, I can only assume you areat your wits ends. I was attempting to help you brain storm. I often have mystudents do such activities when they’re planning projects. Have you triedmaking a mind map? I’ve a worksheet for it somewhere. Dr. Mericet can—‘

‘No.’

‘No mind-map? Or no youhaven’t investigated his relatives and staff?’

Vimes fumes at him thenstalks off after one of his officers. Downey watches for a long minute thenidly turns to Mericet, ‘we’ve stashed the unofficial guild log-books?’

‘I did it myself.’

‘Excellent.’

Downey allows the Watcha five minute grace period to make their usual mess before trailing after them.He finds the lab rooms little touched but the weapons development wingthoroughly gone through. He tsks as he rights a chair.

‘I will want receipts foreverything broken,’ he says.

Vimes pretends not tohear him.

‘And a full log ofeverything taken in evidence.’

The commander continueshis silent smoking.

‘There’s also no smokingin classrooms.’

Vimes turns around in, slowmeasured pace. He takes his cigar and with pointed look, snubs it out in anempty mug left on a desk. Downey beams at him. This appears to sour thecommander’s mood more. Downey beams more.

From down the halltowards the supplies rooms an officer calls for Vimes. Both the commander andDowney head in the direction of the voice.

It is deep in the coldroom, where perishables are kept for research, where a blonde officer standsbeside a collection of oleander clippings.

‘This is the plant, sir.’The officer says.

‘Please explain why youhave oleander clippings in this uh-‘ Vimes looks around for a name.

‘Cold storage,’ Downeysupplies. He stares at the two officers and wonders at their intelligencelevel. Dog-botherer is becoming soft, he thinks, if he allows, out of some misguided affection, these two tocontinue as shining examples of Ankh-Morpork’s detective abilities.  

‘Your lordship?’ Vimesprompts.

Downey blinks. ‘This isthe Assassins’ Guild,’ he clarifies.

‘Yes I am aware.’

Downey continues tostare at Vimes. ‘We inhume people for money.’

‘Yes.’ Vimes glares. ‘Iam aware of that, too.’

‘Why do you think we have oleander in coldstorage? We have all sorts of poisons. You’re standing next to jimson weed andfoxglove.’

‘Bag it,’ Vimesinstructs the officer. ‘I’m taking it in evidence.’

Downey shrugs. Vimeswags a finger under his nose threatening that if he finds so much as hint of Downey or any of his ilk beinginvolved in this murder he will bring the fires of the gods down on the guild.

Patting Vimes’ cheekDowney purrs, ‘I’m sure you will, your grace.’

Vimes pulls back, visiblyuncomfortable and evidently deeply suspicious.

‘I don’t coat my handsin poison, you know.’

The suspicion growsdeeper. Downey smiles at him, it’s not a very pretty expression.

//

Night brings a coolingoff of both tensions between the guild and the Watch and temperatures on theunseasonably warm autumn day. Downey sits with a brandy and a stack of termpapers. A shift in the office equilibrium. It feel as if a weight has beenplaced in a corner, the far one to be exact, by a convenient hidden panel.

Alsace, useless dog,rolls over and half-heartedly woofs.

‘It’s fine,’ Downey sayswithout looking up.

‘You put the commanderin a decidedly poor mood,’ a soft voice says from the corner.

Downey sits back in hischair, pulling glasses off and rubbing the bridge of his nose. ‘He put me in afouler one I can assure you.’

‘He is convinced youwere, ah, “playing games”.’

Vetinari materializes asif smoke.

‘Me? Playing games? I’dnever.’

Vetinari tilts his headto the side, goes ‘hmm’ in an unconvinced tone, then crosses over to a sparechair near Downey’s desk. Removing a stack of papers from it he drags it so heis seated opposite Downey.

Downey points atVetinari with his glasses, ‘they ransacked my classrooms.’

‘I believe they left receipts.’

That isn’t the point.Downey explains how that isn’t he point. He explains for fifteen minutes then divotsinto ten minutes on how the Watch was a mistake then manages to talk himselfaround to acknowledging the role of law enforcement in a civilized society butthat doesn’t mean he has to like them.

Being one of life’snatural listeners Vetinari listens with great patience.

‘Anyway,’ Downeyfinishes up. ‘How are you?’

‘A great deal moreinformed than I was previously about your views on law enforcement in acivilized society.’

‘Not that I’d callAnkh-Morpork particularly civilized.’

‘Hm, I suppose not.’Vetinari steeples his fingers and presses lips against them in thought. ‘I wasthinking about plants today.’

Downey perks up.

‘Namely the one yougifted me a few Hogswatches ago.’

‘Theresa.’

‘Yes.’

‘She’s perfect.’

‘I suppose.’

‘No she is. It’s a term –never mind. Continue.’

Vetinari blinks atDowney. Downey admires the mildly perplexed look with great affection. Vetinariregains his composure and explains his thoughts on Theresa namely, it’s anoleander plant if he isn’t much mistaken (he’s not mistaken) and that justseems rather coincidental all things considered.

‘Theresa’s never beenused for inhumation purposes.’ Downey clarifies.

‘Indeed.’

‘I’d never gift thePatrician of Ankh-Morpork a murder plant.’

‘But would you giftDog-botherer one?’

‘In a heartbeat.’

Vetinari snorts. Looksup the ceiling for a moment then asks, ‘so which one was it that you gave thisplant to?’

With a smile Downeystands and goes around the desk to perch at the edge directly in front ofVetinari. Leaning over he kisses the patrician chastely before murmuringagainst him, ‘Dog-botherer of course. I’m honoured you keep it on your deskthough.’

Vetinari sits backexplaining that it’s a rather ominous looking plant. It puts people on edgewhich pleases him mightily. Downey preens.

A commotion in the hall interrupts.Downey is around the other side of the desk and in his chair faster than ablink. The door to his office bangs open and a harried looking head studentspills out something about the Watch and the cold storage and a body and it isn’this fault he promises and he is so sorry and oh gods that’s the Patrician.

‘Knock and wait to becalled in next time, Mr. Crowden.’ Downey intones in a bored voice.

‘Oh gods yes sir, sorrysir, none of this will ever happen again I promise sir.’ He glances at Vetinariwith a worried expression. ‘Your lordship.’

Downey slowly neatenshis papers then stands with a mildly annoyed sigh.

‘Very well, show me tothe debacle that has clearly unfolded.’ To Vetinari, ‘I won’t be a moment, yourlordship.’

Vetinari with evident curiositypeaked replies, ‘oh don’t mind me,’ as he stands to follow. Downey’s face saysvery clearly, I do mind. Vetinaricheerily ignores him.

//

The cold storage is fullof shouting which Downey fears will disturb both students and plants. Mr.Crowden, head student of the Viper House, hangs back and watches withtrepidation as Downey and Vetinari enter the darkened rooms.

‘There is a body herenow!’ A voice hisses.

‘Indeed,’ Dr. Mericetcalmly replies. ‘You’ve pointed this out three times now, captain.’

‘A dead body.’

Downey comes to the backroom to find a body laid out on the table, Dr. Mericet looking for all theworld like he is discussing the weather, and the blonde officer from before.Apparently a captain.

‘Can I be of assistance?’Downey interrupts.

The captain looks to himthen she catches sight of Vetinari. She stops, her mouth opening and closing afew times.

Downey points toVetinari, ‘Guild Provost. Didn’t you know? Anyway, how can I help you?’

The captain indicatesthe body, ‘could you explain this, your lordship?’

Downey appraises thebody, ‘male, late forties, died from a head wound to the left temporal lobe,dead for no more than forty-eight hours I would say, Captain—‘

‘Angua.’

‘Captain Angua.’

‘We’ve been introducedbefore,’ she states.

‘Have we? My.’

‘Multiple times, yourlordship.’

‘That’s nice.’

Uncertain of how torespond to Downey’s polite up-beat earnestness she returns to the matter athand.

‘Um, may I ask how thebody got here?’

Downey looks to Mericetwho says that it was attained in an entirely legal manner and he can give herthe receipts if she would like. Angua says she is not sure how a murdered deadbody can be attained legally.

‘Ah,’ Downey nodssagely. ‘Some kind souls dedicate the bodies of those they had inhumed toscience. It’s for the greater good, you know. Allows future generations ofassassins to have firsthand experience learning human anatomy and as you know,captain, anatomy is very important. It can mean all the difference betweenquick and slow death. By the by, how did you get in?’

‘I heard a disturbance,’Angua replies smoothly. ‘It’s my job to inspect disturbances.’

Downey and Mericet stareat her with even, polite smiles. Vetinari, apparently disinterested, has takenhimself off to inspect other parts of the cold storage. Angua looks between thetwo assassins, the back of the patrician, and decides that this is perhaps thecorrect time to leave.

‘I’ll be going then,’she says. ‘Since everything is clearly under control.’

‘Thank you for stoppingby,’ Mericet says as he leads the way out of the cold storage to the hall andstairs back up to the ground floor. ‘It’s most kind of you to check on us.’

‘Right,’ she says. ‘Ohfor my report, can I have a copy of the inhumation receipt?’

‘Of course,’ Downeyreplies. ‘Mr. Crowden here will run it over to the Watch house in the morning.’

Angua looks at all ofthe mild faces that bleed almost into impassive. This is far above her paygrade and so she touches her helmet and takes herself off.

‘How’d she get in?’Downey snarls once the main door is closed.

‘Oh I dare say she was sniffing around,’ Vetinari saysamiably. ‘It’s her job, after all.’

‘Well she can sniff elsewhere.’

‘Indeed.’

//   

Back in the office andwith the evening returning to the calm it had before the brief interruption Downeydrags Vetinari through the corner panel door, down a narrow, wood panelledpassageway to the room he keeps at the guild.

‘So,’ Vetinari asks asDowney pulls him down into the bed. ‘Two illicit inhumations in two days? Don’tmake me send my auditors on you.’

‘Oh,’ Downey is smug. ‘Tryyour worst. I’ve dealt with some nasty ones during my tenure. I ever tell youabout the time we were hired to inhume the Hogfather?’

Vetinari snorts, kissesDowney while saying, ‘no, I don’t believe you have. But please, regale me withthe mad misadventures of your time as master of the Assassins’ Guild. I believemy clerks only catch a quarter of it.’

‘Not even.’

[windycityparrot]

My bird won't play with toys or eat new foods are two problems that solve each other

A clear theme that emerges after reading endless threads on Facebook bird groups is "my bird won't play with toys" - "my bird doesn't play with toys" "my bird only wants to chew the keys off my notebook computer" Ho·lis·tic - hōˈlistik - adjective - characterized by comprehension of the parts of something as intimately interconnected and explicable only by reference to the whole. Another way of putting it is "we are not connecting the dots" Bird food is connected to bird toys which are connected to bird cages and bird stands and everything has to work together. There is a large overlap of caged bird keepers who claim the birds will eat nothing new nor with a play with toys - which is the problem and the solution - we need to combine the toys with the food - for starters. Let's back up for a moment and define the role of toys in your bird's lives Enrichment - reducing or eliminating boredom Privacy - using toys like the leaves of a tree in the wild in the top one-third of the cage Foraging - working for food Studies have shown time and time again that parrots prefer to forage for their meals rather than simply having unlimited food sources and open dishes. Here's a video of peaches ignoring her open food dish preferring to remove the toy parts in the foraging box to gain access to nutriberries and sunflower seeds. If your bird is not playing with his toys is not interested in its toys in if your bird is not eating his food is not interested in its food. This tells us we need to combine the two toys and food. Make mealtime interesting Not five or 10 minutes eating out of the overfilled food dish and then returning to the top of the cage. If your bird is not "playing" with toys try thinking of ways to attach food to said toys. You attach almost anything from militant fruit to almost anything else using cable ties. If you don't have any vine balls or small toy parts crinkle up small balls of newspaper (yes it's safe for birds) tissue paper anything in that order and cover the food dish so I can see the food - do that for a couple of days and call me in the morning. The other issue is birds acting indiscriminately destructive like popping off your notebook computer keys. If the bird sees you working on a computer it sees the computer as a toy and wants to work on the computer too. If you're searching for something to watch a Netflix the bird wants to play with the remote (remotes contain deadly batteries) If you're not offering alternatives to computer keyboards and remotes expect them to be destroyed. Birds are amoral they are not being bad - they are being birds. Diana Alexander Nichols she will never learn the meaning of no in her entire lifetime - it’s not how parrots are wired all she wants to do is play with your toys you need to offer alternatives when she is out of the cage - this is peaches our seven-year-old Senegal that we rescued about 2 1/2 months ago parrots are wired all she wants to do is play with your toys you need to offer alternatives when she is out of the cage - this is peaches our seven-year-old Senegal that we rescued about 2 1/2 months ago. There is a notebook computer behind her three remotes next to notebook computer in front of her where I'm taking the picture there are three more keyboards and 2 more remotes - you can see she is on a stand and quite content - at the base of the stand is a foraging box filled with toy parts and at the bottom of the box are sunflower seeds nutriberries walnuts and almonds - Peaches climbs up and down all day foraging for nummies and I refill the box from the floor - all day - she has toys on the stand - the right one is missing because she chewed it off - a good thing - she climbs down there every once in a while and I will bring her over to me to pet and then replace her on the stand - we do this for 4 to 6 hours a day when I'm working at home or I may put her in the cage with the door open she's not flighted yet so she cannot return to it by herself - in my humble opinion your bird cage could use more toys - we feel toys in a bird cage are to birds what the leaves on the trees are to birds in the wild. We advocate enough toys for a bird to hide behind for privacy - we call it the cage canopy concept PM me if you'd like more details Ms Alexander Nichols  Indicated there are not a lot of toys in the cage because the bird is out of the cage most of the day - what about the 12 hours of birdie bedtime in the cage - he asks rhetorically? She also goes on to say that when the bird interacts with the notebook computer she puts the bird back in the cage - without a lot of toys in the process repeats almost daily Mitch Rezman I'm sending you a video - I made a boatload of toys after spending $12 at the dollar store - getting you bird to interact with new toys is a journey - when I fill the foraging box i always give a nibble and make sure see sees me adding the treats to the box - the real prom is computers and remotes have metal - electricity and poisonous batteries - if you click on my profile - you'll see my day gig - I'll work with you in any way to make your experience better with your bird - thank you BTW Here's a link to a $4 keyboard - without electricity running through it - let them pluck the keys off till his hearts content happily thinking that he's got what you got http://www.microcenter.com/product/373546/USB_Wired_Keyboard_-_Black Recently adopted 10-year-old blue and gold macaw whos wings were clipped from the beginning - will he ever fly again? Hi Jessica - we have a similar situation. We recently rescued a seven-year-old Senegal parrot whose wings have been clipped all of her life so she's never flown. Generally speaking birds who do not learn how to fly immediately after fledging lose the ability to fly - or so I'm told. video bed flight lessons Our last bird who passed away in June (cancer) - an albino cockatiel named Popcorn came to us fully flighted. She was an escapee who got caught in some bushes about two blocks away from Windy City Parrot. I brought her home - let her loose - she panicked and ended up behind a dresser. We immediately clipped her wings but they started to grow back fast and about a month into the growth I began to give her “flying lessons”. Cockatiel's are like gymnasts so I started by walking  a foot away from the cage and tossing her onto the cage where she grabbed  the Booda perch on top. During the ensuing weeks I would increase my distance from the cage and then started introducing alternate landing areas throughout the house in every room so she knew exactly where to go with no confusion. She was with us 3 1/2 years and about 90 days after we clipped her wings we began a morning ritual in which she followed me throughout the house from room to room. We have a 62 foot long apartment. The living room and dining room are about 30 feet long divided by two large solid oak pillars. In the morning when I opened up the cage door she would take off and do figure eights - three or four laps until she landed on her cage waiting to see what room I would go in. Peaches our Senegal is an entirely different situation because she's a tremendous and precise climber but she leads with her beak which is not a good way to land. I've made you a brief video to see how I am addressing this and I hope you will join me on our journey to teach her, controlled flight - It's important to note that we flight proof the house by arranging flowers in front of the lower windows and keep the shades down and make sure she is not distracted by any mirrors Hope that helps - mitchr I’ve started A new post with a video I just made and if for some reason it does not meet the group's guidelines I will PM you with it w post with the video and if for some reason it does not meet the group's guidelines I will PM you with it Click to Post