#dlchristmas18

[ibelieveinturtles]

Ho Ho Ho

Chapters: 4/5

Fandom: Captain America (Movies), Thor (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe

Rating: Mature

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Relationships: Darcy Lewis/Brock Rumlow

Characters: Darcy Lewis, Brock Rumlow, Jack Rollins, Background Avengers

Additional Tags: Christmas, dlchristmas18, prompts, Originally Posted on Tumblr, taserbones, Photoshop, Enemies, but friends to lovers in the continuation I'll never write, okay so i wrote the continuation, triple agent brock rumlow, Post-HYDRA Reveal, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Mutual Pining, but less pining and more snarking, Darcy Lewis is a troll, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Baking

Series: Part 23 of Donuts in My Bra and Other Stories, Part 10 of Mince Spies and Christmassassins

Chapter 4 - Christmas is a Time For Surprises

Summary: Brock gets all the bombs dropped on him.

[grimeysociety]

A DARCY LEWIS HOLIDAY CHALLENGE! (Hosted by ya girl @grimeysociety)

When: Wednesday December 19th to Tuesday December 25th 2018.

What: A holiday themed challenge for seven days, including Christmas Day. Each day will have a different prompt. Big thank you to @meilan-firaga for sending me a huge list of prompts to inspire me. 

How: Create something and post it to your blog. You can write, draw, create a mood board, other graphics, etc. Just include Darcy! These can be any genre, any pairing, and any kind of AU your heart desires. Please do not bash characters or ships! If you include explicit/over 18 content please put it under a cut with a warning. 

Note: When posting your work please include #dlchristmas18 so I can find it and add it to a masterpost. 

PROMPTS:

December 19th, Day 1: Santa Baby

December 20th, Day 2: Gingerbread

December 21st, Day 3: Snowball

December 22nd, Day 4: Last minute shopping

December 23rd, Day 5: Ugly Sweater

December 24th, Day 6: Bah Humbug!

December 25th, Day 7: Mistletoe 

Please reblog and share this challenge! 🎄 🎅 

P.S. Come join the Darcyland Universe Discord!

[fuckyeahdarcylewis]

Ho Ho Ho.

by SerialObsessor (ibelieveinturtles)

Unauthorised use of Photoshop

Words: 781, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Series: Part 23 of Donuts in My Bra and Other Stories

Fandoms: Captain America (Movies), Thor (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe

Rating: Mature

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: F/M

Characters: Darcy Lewis, Brock Rumlow

Relationships: Darcy Lewis/Brock Rumlow

Additional Tags: Christmas, dlchristmas18, prompts, Originally Posted on Tumblr, taserbones, Photoshop, Enemies, but friends to lovers in the continuation I'll never write

from AO3 works tagged 'Darcy Lewis/Brock Rumlow' https://ift.tt/2Rb5hrg via IFTTT

[ibelieveinturtles]

Run, Run, As Fast As You Can

For the Darcy Lewis holiday challenge

Day Two: Gingerbread

~☆~

Darcy ran down the street, caught up in the panicked crowd as sirens blared in the distance. Throwing a glance over her shoulder, she ducked into the mouth of an alley to catch her breath. Panting hard, she leaned against the wall and clutched at the stitch in her side.

Oh, gods. She was in so much trouble. Like, all the trouble.

The ground shook beneath her feet and there were screams from the road. She risked a peek around the corner to see what was happening. There it was, lumbering down the street like Godzilla or King Kong or a kaiju or some shit like that. Except it wasn't any of those things.

“Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit,” she gasped to herself.

The crowd was beginning to thin so she slipped out of the alley, fully intending to flee at her fastest speed. There was a whine overhead, and she craned her neck around to see Iron Man flying towards her own personal version of the first Ghostbusters movie. Would they put her in an ordinary jail, she wondered, or was there a special prison for people who accidentally and completely unintentionally created a 300 foot Gingerbread Captain America?

Well, it wasn't all an accident… the gingerbread Captain America was very intentional. She'd definitely meant to make that. But it was only meant to be three feet tall. Not 300. Definitely NOT 300.

Speaking of whom…

Almost skidding around the corner, she slowed down and came to a stop. The Original VersionTM was now standing in the middle of the street in front of her, shield at the ready as he directed the fleeing populace away from the area.

Darcy felt herself deflate and a bubble of emotion filled her chest. It was hard to breathe.

Maybe if she owned up now she'd get a reduced sentence…

There was an explosion behind her and a scream ripped itself from her throat. Spinning on the spot, she saw that one arm had been torn off GingerCap and Hulk was perched on the other shoulder, doing his best to rip the head from the body. Giant pieces of gingerbread fell to the ground as Iron Man's rockets exploded into its torso and she screamed again, ducking beneath her own arms as a huge chunk flew towards her.

Death by her own creation seemed preferable to Super Villain prison right now, and she waited for the end…

Nothing happened.

She lowered her arms and opened her eyes. Standing in front of her, shield held high, was The Real Captain America, protecting her from the rain of cookie chunks falling from the sky.

That's one hell of an ass. The thought popped unbidden into her head and she groaned. Cos that was just what she should be thinking about right now.

The Original VersionTM whirled around, threw his free arm around her shoulders and pulled her into his side. Gingerbread continued to rain down on the shield and she whimpered.

“I'm so sorry,” she blurted out. “I never meant for this to happen. I don't even know how this happened! I'm a baker. I bake things. I swear, I'm not a super villain. I promise. Cross my heart and hope to d- Oh god, I'm never making gingerbread again!”

There was a chuckle in her ear. “You made that? You're the baker?”

Darcy froze. Oh shit. She'd just babbled a full confession to Captain America himself.

“Um, no?” She tried to backtrack but discovered she couldn't handle the stress of lying to the epitome of Peace and Justice. “Yes,” she admitted. “It was me. I made it.”

He grinned at her and winked. “It's good gingerbread. I stole one of the little Iron Man cookies right before the big one got hit with the… well, whatever it was that made this happen.”

She gaped at him. “Wait - it's not my fault?”

He shook his head. “No, ma'am.”

The rain of gingerbread stopped and he carefully lowered the shield. The decapitated gingerbread Captain lay on the road in front of them, Hulk sitting in the middle of the wreckage, happily chewing on an arm.

Captain America stood up, pulling Darcy to her feet after him. They surveyed the wreckage together and Darcy realised there were tears running down her cheeks.

“Are you okay?” the Captain asked.

Darcy nodded. “Yeah. It's just…” she paused to wipe her cheeks before turning a watery smile on him. “It took me three full days to make that damn thing. What a wasted effort.”

~☆~

I don't know what links are doing to posts these days??? But its also on AO3, and if you look at the reblog (which I'll do in a minute or ten) there'll be links to the kind of gingerbread sculpture I'm envisioning 😁😆

[ibelieveinturtles]

Santa Baby

For the Darcyland Holiday Challenge

Day 1 (pretty sure it's already the 20th everywhere now but better late than never, right?)

An AU of uncertain description.

Written and posted from my phone, beta'd by @zephrbabe

~☆~

Darcy was bored.

With only a week to go until Christmas, Jane had unexpectedly decided to close up the lab and go on holidays with Thor to somewhere sunnier and warmer, leaving Darcy all alone.

It wasn’t that she didn’t have anything to do. There was lots to do - data entry, data analysis, working on her thesis, baking, shopping… Yep, Darcy had plenty of things to do and no desire to do any of them. She had no desire to do anything even remotely work related right now.

She was about to turn her computer off and sneak home early when the STRIKE Team made their way down the corridor.

One of her favourite activities was watching STRIKE strut past the labs every day. Today, most of them were fully kitted out in their tac gear but bringing up the rear, several of them were wearing the slightly-less-intimidating publicity outfits topped off with Santa and Elf hats.

Resting her chin on her hand, Darcy was happily admiring the view when she gradually became aware that one of the bodies had stopped moving and turned to face the window. Reluctantly she dragged her eyes away from Agent Kawalski's ass to meet the disapproving gaze of the STRIKE Commander.

Darcy felt all the joy drain right out of her. Great. From admiring asses to dealing with an asshole in two point five seconds flat. As if any of them talked to her eyes instead of her boobs. She sat up straight, tossed her hair over her shoulder, and took another long, deliberate look at Kawalski's assets. Flashing what she hoped was a ‘fuck you, I'll ogle whoever I damn well want’ look at the Commander, she went back to her work.

When she cautiously peeked past her screen a minute or so later the corridor was empty. Almost empty. Standing up for a better look, she saw a lone Santa Hat lying forgotten on the floor. After making sure no one was lingering, she dashed out to pick it up.

And then she had an idea.

~☆~

The first hint Brock had that Something Was Up, was the sidelong glances and increased murmuring from the secretaries when he went to drop in the squad reports and requisition forms to Rosie, the STRIKE liaison. He was used to the looks and whispers, but there was a significant difference in today’s tone. Today, there were giggles.

While he wasn't the type to be paranoid about this kind of thing it wasn't a hard decision to drop his paperwork off in person instead of using the mail cubicles.

He knocked on Rosie's door.

“Hey, Rosie. I got you a Christmas present,” he joked, dropping the folder onto Rosie's in-tray.

“Wow, thanks.” She cast him a dark look as she tapped away at her keyboard.

“Hey, ah. Do you know what's going on out there?”

Rosie stopped typing and looked up him, eyebrows raised. “You haven't seen them?”

“Seen what?”

“Oh dear,” Rosie said, her face looking like it wanted to laugh and frown at the same time. “Go and take a look at the notice board outside the cafeteria.”

“The notice board?”

She nodded firmly. “Just- when you see it - please, remember - it's Christmas and everyone wants to live to see their families.”

“What?” Brock was starting to feel equally concerned and curious.

“Just go. Go on - shoo!”

He left the office, mind set on his new destination.

~☆~

Five minutes later he was standing outside the cafeteria with several other people, staring at the main notice board.

There were several photographs pinned to it. Including his. Brock stared at them for a long minute, then turned to the person next to him. It was one of the secretaries.

“Do you know anything about this?”

“They were there when we got in this morning,” she replied with only the tiniest of flinches.

“Who did it?”

She shook her head. “I’ve got no idea.”

Brock studied her for a minute, then turned back to the pictures.

Photographs of every member of his STRIKE Team, as well as Romanoff, Barton, Barnes, Hill, Carter, and Rogers were pinned to the corkboard. For the most part the pictures were official I.D. headshots but several had obviously been sources from… other places. Every single one of them had something seasonal photoshopped over them.

The entire STRIKE team was wearing reindeer antlers.

Cap and Co. were all sporting Santa or elf hats.

Jack had an elf’s hat photoshopped onto his head and a small balloon with the words ‘Smile! It’s Christmas’ in it.

His picture...his half naked picture… had a Santa hat. And a white beard. And the words ‘Ho Ho Ho.’

~☆~

[grimeysociety]

“Christmastime” fanfiction by @mee2themoo​  - Darcy/Steve/Bucky

“Christmas Cupid” fanfiction by @fanficfinagler​  - Darcy/Clint

“crushcrushcrush” fanfiction by @grimeysociety​  - Darcy/Steve

“Santa Baby” fanfiction by @caitriona-3  - Darcy/Coulson

“Ho Ho Ho.” fanfiction by @ibelieveinturtles - Darcy/Brock Rumlow

“Run, Run, As Fast As You Can” fanfiction by @ibelieveinturtles - Darcy/Steve

“Gingerbread Meeting” fanfiction by @caitriona-3 - Darcy/Clint

“The Snowball” fanfiction by @grimeysociety - Darcy/Bucky

“Making Snowballs” fanfiction by @caitriona-3 - Darcy/Steve

“Unexpected Gifts” fanfiction by @caitriona-3 - Darcy/Steve/Bucky

“Pretty Little Body, It Looks Better On You” fanfiction by @grimeysociety - Darcy/Female!Thor

“Bringing Christmas” fanfiction by @caitriona-3 - Darcy/Bucky/Clint

“Bah Humbug” fanfiction by @caitriona-3 - Darcy/Clint/Natasha

“Mistletoe Dreams” fanfiction by @caitriona-3 - Darcy/Bucky

“Fight Me” fanfiction by @ibelieveinturtles - Darcy/?

“Going Down” fanfiction by @ibelieveinturtles - Darcy/Brock Rumlow

This post will be updated regularly! Please remember to tag your posts with #dlchristmas18 or message me a link to your fanwork. 

Thank you for participating in this challenge!  ❤️ 🎄

original challenge post

darcyland universe discord

[grimeysociety]

crushcrushcrush

“I’m trying to gauge your motivation, Cap,” Natasha said, and Steve finally looked at her again. He swallowed. “Friendship.” “Sure,” Sam and Natasha said together, unconvinced. (a.k.a. Steve gets Darcy's name for Secret Santa.)

Read the whole fic here! https://archiveofourown.org/works/17056790

[ibelieveinturtles]

Ho Ho Ho

Chapter Three

Bah Humbug!

Brock’s a cranky old man, Darcy’s a troll, and all problems can be solved with sugar.

[ibelieveinturtles]

Candy Canes and Guns

Ho Ho, Ho, Chapter 2

Darcy scowled as she read the email. Who would have thought Commander Asshat was so thin skinned?

‘Inappropriate use of staff photos,’ the email said. ‘Culprit will be disciplined,’ it continued. Blah, blah, blah. Etc. etc. etc. The man obviously had no sense of humour, because the general consensus regarding the pictures was that they were great. Especially the one of the Commander. Some of the comments she'd overheard from HR were definitely sexual harassment material, except HR were the ones saying them.

Glancing up at the clock she realised it was almost lunch time. Drumming her fingers on the desk, she read the email again. Then she opened and reread a different email. It simply said ‘Nice job. Let me know if you need anything else.’

She chewed on her thumb as she considered her options, then sent a reply that simply said ‘Hit me up. Everything you’ve got, please.’

Clicking send, she logged off, grabbed her phone and purse, and headed for the cafeteria for lunch.

Ten minutes after she sat down with Maria and Sharon, the STRIKE team arrived. They were all in casual clothes today, but she almost spat her drink out when she realised nearly half of them were sporting reindeer headbands.

“Holy fuck!” she gasped, and promptly started coughing as a drop of juice went down the wrong way.

“What?”

“Are you okay?”

Maria started thumping her on the back and Sharon reached for a glass of water.

“Turn around,” she wheezed out between bouts of coughing.

They turned around.

“Oh, my god,” Sharon snorted.

At the very back of the group, Commander No Sense of Humour was holding a pile of partially scrunched up paper that he dropped into the nearest trash can even as Darcy looked on.

Before she could turn back to her lunch he looked up and straight at her. The frown on his face deepened and he headed towards her, Rollins trailing behind him.

Panic welled up in her chest. He couldn’t have found out already, she thought. It was impossible.

Before she could do anything he was there.

“You found out who did it yet?” The comment was directed at Maria and Darcy almost collapsed onto her plate with relief.

“I don’t know why it’s an issue,” Maria replied. “It hasn’t hurt anyone - in fact I’ve seen a distinct increase in morale and general good humour since they went up.”

“It was inappropriate,” he snapped back. “A misuse of official S.H.I.E.L.D. resources, and-”

“Oh, get over yourself, Brock,” Sharon chimed in. “It was harmless. You could take a lead from your team and get with the program. It’s Christmas.”

“That’s what I’ve been saying,” Rollins said. Darcy looked at him properly for the first time and grinned. He was wearing an elf hat. “Candy cane anyone?” He held out a bucket. All three women helped themselves.

“Would you quit it with the damn candy canes?” Rumlow grumbled at his 2IC. He turned back to Maria. “It made STRIKE look ridiculous. I’ve taken them down,” he told her.

Darcy snorted.

“You got something to say?” Rumlow demanded.

Darcy pasted a smile on her face and looked up from the candy cane she was unwrapping.

“More ridiculous than that?” She waved the candy cane at where the reindeer-antler-bedecked STRIKE was lining up for their lunch. “I can’t believe you’re letting your reindeer run around without you, Santa. Chill out, dude. It’s Christmas. Also, what have you got against candy canes?” She pulled the last of the wrapping from the one in her hand and waved it in front of him. “They’re delicious.”

“I don’t eat sugar,” he said.

Darcy tipped her to one side, giving him her most pitying look as she stood up. “Aw, no wonder you’re so miserable all the time,” she said.

“I’m not miserable.”

“Could have fooled me.” She smiled at him sweetly, stuck the candy in her mouth, and left.

She’d just had another idea.

~☆~

Brock had reached a dead end trying to find out who was responsible for the photos. No one wanted to help him find out, either. The entire STRIKE team had taken the idea and run with it - Kawalski and O’Neill had left a Santa costume on his desk; Williams and Martinez brought the reindeer antler things in and Jack - well, Jack thought the whole thing was hilarious and he’d laughed for a solid five minutes behind the safety of a locked office door where no one could see him.

Running his hands through his hair, Brock wondered if he should just concede defeat and go with the flow. He picked up the Santa hat and stared at it. It would be nice to prove Lewis wrong, he thought. How dare she accuse him of being miserable all the time!

His laptop chimed with an incoming email. Tossing the hat to one side, he clicked on the email... and froze.

What. The actual. Fuck.

He scrolled.

And scrolled.

And scrolled.

Then he scrolled all the way back up and started again, studying each picture as it rolled across his screen.

Candy canes and guns… although to be more accurate it was candy canes instead of guns.

More fucking photoshopped pictures.

By the time he scrolled back the top again Brock was fuming. He slammed his laptop closed and then opened it again straight away.

“Goddamn fucking hell.”

“You okay in here?” Jack poked his head through the doorway.

“Do you know anything about this?” Brock spun the laptop around for Jack to look at.

Jack scrolled through the pictures, shaking his head.

“If I was any part of this, you wouldn't be the only shirtless wonder in it. Why don't I get the shirtless Santa treatment?”

“What?” Brock blinked, and Jack chuckled.

“I know you're not the only person who parades around the locker room without a shirt on, so how come you're the only one who's shirtless pictures got the photoshop treatment? Whoever did this,” Jack indicated the laptop, “seems to have a thing for you.”

~☆~

[ibelieveinturtles]

Going Down

Darcy Lewis Holiday Challenge

December 23rd, Day 5: Ugly Sweater “Beachwear”

As someone currently dealing with a shitty Australian summer heatwave the Ugly Sweater prompt just wasn't working for me so I took the liberty of changing it. Sorrynotsorry.

Post Winter Soldier au of some sort. Triple agents Brock and Jack; Aussie Jack Rollins. Soulmate au where everyone is born with the first words their soulmate will say to them tattooed on their skin.

Beta'd by @zephrbabe

~*~

Brock Rumlow stood in the new Strike locker room, staring down his second-in-command.

“No,” he said.

“You have to do it,” said Jack, blocking the doorway and Brock’s only possible escape route. “You already vetoed the other option.”

“Skinny dipping in the river is sounding pretty good right now.”

“Too late, mate.”

Brock glared at Jack. Maybe if he tried another tactic he could avoid the humiliation in his future. “This was never part of the bet,” he insisted. “No one ever said anything about wearing...that.”

“The terms were that the loser would perform a task chosen by the team, from a list pre-approved by all of us. It's definitely on the list that you approved, just like the rest of us. You lost. We chose. Put it on.” Jack Rollins held the offending item out, a wide grin stretched across his usually grim visage.

“No,” Brock repeated.

“You tryin’ to back out, Rumlow?"

Brock cursed silently to himself and turned around. How in seven hells had Rogers snuck up behind him like that?

“No way, Cap. Just trying to save my modesty.”

“Bit late for that, don’t you think?” Rogers lifted an eyebrow, but his mouth was twitching and Brock realised he was trying very hard not to laugh. “You lost the bet fair and square, now it’s time to pay up. Put it on. We’ll be waiting outside.”

Brock sighed. There was no way Rogers was going to let him out of this. “Can I at least get something to cover my soulmark?”

Rogers thought for a moment, then nodded. “You can wear one of your sleeves.”Brock turned back to Jack, snatched the thing from his hand and retreated to a change room. He was never going to live this down.

Ten minutes later he stood at the door of the locker room, ready to face the music. He rolled his shoulders, adjusted the straps - and other bits - for the fiftieth time, then pushed through the door to a wave of friendly jeers and catcalls.

“Right,” said Jack, “so you have to do a lap of the lobby, ride the left elevator to the top floor, swap to the right elevator, and get off at the cafeteria. We’ll be waiting for you there, and remember - Agent Martin will be watching the cameras so don’t think you can skip out halfway or anything.”

“Don’t forget this.” Rogers held out a sequined Santa hat. Brock gathered the withered scraps of his dignity and put it on.

“You’re all gonna pay for this,” he said, and set off down the corridor.

Jack, Steve, and the rest of Strike Alpha watched Brock stalk away.

“How the hell does he manage to look like he's two seconds away from committing murder even wearing that thing?” Steve asked.

Jack shrugged. “You sayin’ you wouldn't be thinking murder if it was you?”

Steve stared thoughtfully down the corridor. “Probably not,” he decided. “Shall we go watch?”

~*~

Read the rest on AO3.

[ibelieveinturtles]

Candy Canes and Guns

Chapter 2 of Ho, Ho, Ho is now on AO3, but when I tried to post it to Tumblr it immediately got hidden. (It's probably because of one of the collages I added to it.) I've requested a review but until then please read and comment on AO3!

[ibelieveinturtles]

Darcy Lewis Holiday Challenge Day 4 - Last Minute Shopping.

Darcy’s determined to get this shopping done and no one’s gonna get in her way.

Soulmate au where everyone is born with the first words their soulmate will say to them tattooed on their skin. Modern no-powers au.

This one is unbeta'd and three days late. Better late than never though, right? :-D

It's already Christmas Day here in sunny Queensland. I hope everyone has a really nice day without too much stress or drama, and remember - if you need a break, even from the people who love you - there's always the bathroom ;-)

MERRY CHRISTMAS LOVELY READERS!

[grimeysociety]

Pretty Little Body, It Looks Better On You

“Thor?” Darcy’s dad said, eyebrows raised. “I thought Thor was… a man.” “She was. They were.”

(Sequel to God is a woman, but can be read alone.)

Read the fic here! https://archiveofourown.org/works/17100815

[fuckyeahdarcylewis]

Going Down

by SerialObsessor (ibelieveinturtles)

Brock lost a bet and has to pay the price

Words: 888, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Series: Part 26 of Donuts in My Bra and Other Stories

Fandoms: Captain America (Movies), Thor (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe

Rating: Mature

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: F/M

Characters: Darcy Lewis, Brock Rumlow, Steve Rogers, Jack Rollins

Relationships: Darcy Lewis/Brock Rumlow

Additional Tags: Christmas, dlchristmas18, prompts, Originally Posted on Tumblr, beachwear, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Soulmates, Soulmate-Identifying Marks

from AO3 works tagged 'Darcy Lewis/Brock Rumlow' http://bit.ly/2Ai3S8q via IFTTT

[fuckyeahdarcylewis]

Run, Run, As Fast As You Can

by SerialObsessor (ibelieveinturtles)

Imagine Ghostbusters but with gingerbread

Words: 755, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Series: Part 24 of Donuts in My Bra and Other Stories

Fandoms: Captain America (Movies), Thor (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe

Rating: Mature

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: F/M

Characters: Darcy Lewis, Steve Rogers

Relationships: Darcy Lewis/Steve Rogers

Additional Tags: Christmas, dlchristmas18, prompts, Originally Posted on Tumblr, gingerbread, Bakery AU, apocalyptic gingerbread

via AO3 works tagged 'Darcy Lewis/Steve Rogers' https://ift.tt/2CpPkFt