#distorted twink

[emeritus-fuckers]

OH WAIT!

Hear me out... Repugnant and letting reader top/dom for the first time??? What do they like when the roles are switched?

Repugnant being topped by their s/o for the first time

Mary Goore (they/them)

Bottom in denial.

It's not so much that they think they're a top, they're just convinced they're much more top leaning than they actually are, while they're much better at bottoming.

Basically, this bitch lets you do pretty much anything you please.

They like it rough. Actually, they love it rough. You can literally abuse them and they'll love it.

Honestly, do absolutely anything to them, but the meaner you are, the better.

They'll thrive in it. They're a complete fucking masochist.

In denial about their need for aftercare, but they'll go with it if that's what you want.

DD Sars (he/him; fwb, not s/o)

You either took him by surprise, managed to turn a situation around completely when he was teasing you or managed to get him really needy.

Either way, this bitch will be so in denial it's frustrating.

He's so unnecessarily aggressive it doesn't make sense, honestly.

Even meaner than he is when he tops.

Either rail him stupid or be painfully soft and sweet, and you'll get him in tears.

He's very clingy for an hour or so afterwards.

Will deny it if you even dare bring it up. Will also get very pissy if you try to leave too soon.

G. Grotesque (he/him)

Honestly, he prefers it this way.

He likes feeling loved and cared for.

Soft dom this man. He will melt completely.

And tear up, muttering about how much he loves you with the cutest pouts and whimpers.

Hold his pretty face and tell him how well he's doing.

He's the sweetest sub imaginable.

Be nice to him. Give him all the kisses.

He's gonna be so adorably clingy afterwards, you'd have to be a heartless monster to not love him.

G.'s the type of person you can never really get enough of. You always end up coming back, even if just to hang out.

E. Forcas (he/him)

He really trusts you for this to happen.

He likes in gentle. He's only not gentle when it comes to his drums. He's a beast when it comes to his instrument.

But in bed and in a relationship, he's a complete softie. He's awkward, but a sweetheart.

He won't admit it, but he'd love it if you were gentle and maybe... just maybe, possibly dabble in body worship just a tiny little bit...?

He likes being kissed all over, it's something that G. does when he notices that E.'s tired.

This man is the softest service top usually. Give him the same treatment he gives you.

He deserves the love. Give him all the love.

Yes, I have a favorite.

~

Written by Nosferatu.

Taglist: @copias-fluffy-asscheeks @tuttifuckinfruttifriday @calliedion-dungeon @callmeicaro @thecuriouss @thermodynamic-comedian @vampyrolesbos

[themagnusaghchives]

Michael and Helen are now my actual gender. When I say I like to confuse people by existing I mean I like to make my eldritch corridor pop up and torment you but either only you can see it or only you can open it. Then once you’re inside I will eat you sanity or turn you into me. Have a nice day in my freaky house!

[ghostlypinkbiscuit]

MICHAEL ❗❗❗🌀🚪

[socvinc]

Some micheal doodles

[magpod-confessions]

Really dislike how Micheal Distortion is portrayed in fandom. The general twinkification of Micheal is genuinely so irritating to me, I know we're the twink-the-monsters fandom but I think there's better ways to imagine him that aren't making him a thin white twink. Plus, I know some Micheal fans that fully demonize Gertrude, which is unreasonable. Yes, she sacrificed him, but she had her reasons, and she's a morally gray character anyways. I like the canonical Micheal, but I'm just not an enjoyer of the fanon version. Sorry:(

.

[ghostbatsz]

I'm making my friend listen to TMA and their reaction to Micheal is so amazing I can't

[rocksanddeadflowers]

I love that you can categorize almost every gerry fanart somewhere on a slide scale that looks like this:

goth twink <--------> peter steele

[wait----------what]

Sometimes its best to ignore random people's opinions when you didn't ask for them. It probably just got on the wrong end of the Internet for a bit and is fine

Yeah this is not one of those times, this thing deserved the hate it got

[alelathedragon]

Magical Bullshit

Magical Bullshit

( this is my King Boo Gijinka. His body - does not matter what so ever. If it takes damage it will recoil to his body ofc but like, if bro gets rid of the body parts himself then he is fine. Just a head bobbin around and being an asshole)

[emeritus-fuckers]

I have a Repugnant ask for you!

I have a very specific daydream while I work that Mary finds out I listen to their music to get through the night.

So maybe a gn!reader who listens to their music outside of gigs, and how they would find out/react to that?

I literally love everything you write, and Mary is my fave. I hope this makes sense lol 🖤

Repugnant finding out their s/o listens to their music

Mary Goore (they/them)

No strong reaction. They just say something along the lines of "cool" and that's it, really.

Might make a shitty joke, asking if you jerk off to their growling.

They might tease you a little if they hear their music on your headphones, asking if you want an autograph or something like that.

Doesn't really change anything in the relationship.

DD Sars (he/him; fwb, not s/o)

Depending on if you're flustered, his reaction will be a bit different.

If you're flustered, he's gonna make fun of you for it.

If you're not, he's just gonna shrug it off.

Either way, basically it all boils down to "yeah dumbass, that's what music is for".

Only really brings it up if it flusters you to tease you.

G. Grotesque (he/him)

Gives you a hug with a small giggle.

He's happy you like the music they make!

Might sneak you some merch or offer to teach you some simpler riffs if you'd like.

Giggles and kisses your cheek whenever he hears you listen to the music.

You get a VIP spot for all their concerts, right in front of the stage.

E. Forcas (he/him)

He doesn't really react. Similarly to Mary, the most he says is something along the lines of "oh, that's nice".

It's not really that big of a deal to him. It's just music you happen to like.

You're dating a death metal drummer, so logically, you like death metal.

And his band makes death metal music. Of course there's a chance you like their songs.

He does have the tiniest smile on his face when he sees you listen to Repugnant, though.

~

Written by Nosferatu.

Taglist: @copias-fluffy-asscheeks @tuttifuckinfruttifriday @calliedion-dungeon @callmeicaro @thecuriouss @nuntia @thermodynamic-comedian @vampyrolesbos

[stillfoodforguys]

I’d been chatting to this man with a round, sexy gut for a while, and was invited over for a hookup with a teasing comment that his belly would be at its largest, just for me. I was in awe when I finally got to his place and saw him in person; as promised, his body was suddenly much larger than any photo he had sent me before.

Fast forward to when we were in his bedroom, my legs spread as wide as they could to wrap around his giant gut while he stuffed his cock deep into my hole. I was mildly distracted from the pleasure of being fucked when I noticed the quiet moaning coming from his belly, it’s round shape distorting now and again with a small bump. I knew right away that I was in the presence of a predator, who must have swallowed another man to make his stomach swell out to a more appealing size for me.

I briefly thought about telling him to stop, but his cock just felt way too good sliding in and out of me that I decided to ignore what was happening in his gut. I didn’t know who was in there; maybe it was his partner, or maybe just another stranger whose kink he was helping to satisfy. Considering how easily he could decide to keep this mystery guy as his meal, I just considered myself lucky that his stomach was already full.

At least, that’s what I thought until after he pumped his load into me, when he reached forward to grab my hands and stuff them into his greedy mouth. Apparently he still had room for more, ravenously gulping me down his throat before I could even think about escaping. As he devoured more and more of my body, I was gradually squeezed in next to the confused twink sitting in his tank. He was having a much worse time all of a sudden, covered in saliva and his own cum while we both got uncomfortably pressed together.

“What the hell? This guy wanted to fuck someone with me filling out his belly, but he promised to let me out!”

The poor chump didn’t realise he’d signed up to become an easy meal for a hungry predator, who sat belching and rubbing his engorged belly as it began to digest us both.

[thermodynamic-comedian]

some of u guys aren't going to like this but it has to be said. in my mind, elias bouchard looks like the world's most average business man. and mike crew looks like a long-haired soft butch lesbian.

the only tma characters i can genuinely see being evil twinks are both of the distortions and nikola orsinov.

[chaifootsteps]

need the fandom to understand that 'character who is the soft one who cries is not equal to the character who is in the right'

it makes sense for a show that's primed it's audience to think abuse is just limited to obvious cruelty and insults (but only when the show says it counts, HB cared about Blitzo being a jerk to Moxxie for all of one conversation) but it's frustrating to see this show touted as 'sooo deep' when it could have done a lot more to show the different types of manipulation and abuse with the material it already has

like, a character that's soft and weepy and constantly rewrites reality to favor himself? that's A grade PSA material for how abusers don't always look like Stella or Crimson and make their targets feel like they're the ones who are crazy or in the wrong

Oh yeah, and for the contingent who says Stolas would be treated way more sympathetically if he was a woman - I kind of doubt it, personally. I think a character like Stolas if he was genderswapped would be judged far more harshly for what he does in the Stol/tz storyline, not less

like the audience would probably jump to 'he reminds me of my mom/girlfriend/other female friend who also uses crying and looking pathetic to get people to take her side despite treating me like dirt', 'this or that trait is such a narcissistic thing to do'.

the show already expects its audience to treat the female characters with way more scrutiny and suspicion after all, but I feel like people are more inclined to recognize the figure of the 'narcissistic woman who's only emotional reality is her own' or the image of 'mom who neglects kid for new beau' than they are when it's a male character

and that's not a bad thing, to be clear! it's good the fandom can recognize abusive behaviors in women, probably most often their mothers (though it is disturbing how little they can acknowledge the emotional landscape of the female characters - there's any number of reasons for Stella to feel disenchanted with her life and the fandom cares about none of them)

the problem is they can't extend that logic to Stolas. they can't see how Sad Owl Twink is distorting reality around his relationship with Blitzo and refusing to treat him like a person, or how he's a subpar dad to Via. it feels like the bar for male characters is being set way lower as long as there's a convenient excuse. and it seems part of the reason is more than just Stolas being male, since logically Blitzo wouldn't be getting it in the neck from Stolas fans so much

it seems like it's also because they seem him as soft and harmless that on top of the extra credit male characters get for doing nothing, they've decided he can do no harm. men already deserve a medal for being connected to their emotions, so if Stolas appears soft and sensitive it means he can't possible be abusive or neglectful at the same time. which is just not true

sorry if this is rambling, kinda thinking out loud

Thank you for sharing these thoughts aloud. It's absolutely true...Viv and her fandom seem to have it in their heads that abuse looks like screaming and insults, that sexual abuse looks like being held down (also that it doesn't count if you "get away,") and that is so, so unbelievably dangerous it genuinely chills the blood. It's going to get someone hurt.

[tinycheesecakedetective]

Potential Swap AU pt. 3(OLD)

I'm still thinking about making this official, mind you. Anyways, welcome to my third blog about this speculative AU project thing. Which isn't so speculative anymore, surprise! I call it Exchanged Fates, and all past and future updates about this AU will have the tag #exchangedfatesau. Today, we've finally reached the last Beast-Ancient pairing, Shadow Milk Cookie and Pure Vanilla Cookie! A fair warning, this one is longer than the others, so be warned. I talk waaaay more here.

Preamble There's a reason why these two are last. Knowledge is a pretty hard virtue to make something out of, and it's even harder when Truth and Deceit are two classic foils. You can make the truth a problem, but lies are always going to be tricky to make a good thing. Initially, Truth would be made into Judgement, but I scrapped it once I realized I couldn't think of anything for Deceit. So I took a break for a bit. I had a birthday and then several historical events just slapped me in the face-

Eventually, I had an epiphany. And I'd like to show you all now, if you'll allow me to. Behold,

Pure Vanilla Cookie, Beast of Despair and Shadow Milk Cookie, Ancient Hero of Hope

...I can feel my Danganronpa phase resurface. No time to waste, let's begin with Pure Vanilla. Throughout the story, he's presented as a paragon character, the most virtuous of the ancients. And it's somewhat true, but there's more to him than just altruism. He's quite sharp, able to discern the plans of his enemies and very emotionally intelligent, but is prone to some self loathing and suffers from an inferiority complex. I'm not *quite* well spoken enough to make a deep analysis on him, although I wish I was. He's so interesting to me and the fandom kind of brushes him off as this sweet old man-twink. Now he is, but there's so much more going on with him. If anyone does a deep analysis into him, I want to know immediately.

Sorry! Got sidetracked there, anyways! Why despair, hmm? Let's head back to his negative traits, the self loathing and the inferiority complex. Pure Vanilla struggles with his self image, blaming himself for how the flour war turned out and feeling as if he failed to protect the ones closest to him. Even after restoring his kingdom, he struggles with these feelings. Granted, it's not as bad as it was before, but you can still feel bits of it in Odyssey and in Beast-Yeast. Despite this, he still pushes onwards, being a beacon of hope for many. But there's only so much the soul can take. Even he can recognize when someone has to be stopped for the greater good, even if they did mean the world to him.

Fittingly, if he was one of the first to gain his soul jam, he'll be the last to turn, how tragic. Pure Vanilla would try everything in his power to save his friends, and when his efforts are unsuccessful, he has to stop them alone. Of course, the former ancients try to turn him to their side, and the battle of wills is long and painful. Since the roles are reversed, Elder Faerie exists and tries to help where he can, but he can see the writing on the wall and prepares for the worst. Eventually, Pure Vanilla falls. Despite everything he's done, nothing changes. He isn't strong enough to save them, and he isn't strong enough to stop them. He's only delayed the inevitable for himself, and even now his soul jam has begun to corrupt. Forced to face his own helplessness, he turns, finally joining his friends in sowing chaos across Beast-Yeast.

The Timeless Kingdom, once a refuge for escapees of the the other kingdoms, becomes stuck in time. Y'know how Blue Diamond emotionally manipulated those around her to make them submit to her will? Imagine that but worse. The kingdom feels like it's frozen in time. Nothing ages or rots, just... distorts. The moment you step foot there, you can feel your strength waver. Walking around, you see people consumed by agony as they stay in place weeping aloud, their bodies warped by a deep sadness as their hollow eyes stare back at you. Unlike the other beasts, Pure Vanilla's palace is open for anyone to visit, almost like he's flaunting his strength. You'll soon understand why. If you make the dumb choice and see him, you'll find him kneeling behind a veil. He'll greet you and talk to you for a moment. But don't be fooled. He's still a beast, and before you know it, you're overwhelmed. Visions of your greatest regrets flood your senses. Every action you've ever taken, every right and wrong choice flashes right in front of your eyes. Fight all you want, you're eventually consumed by it all, and become like the other residents of this forsaken kingdom. Forever reliving your worst moments in a never ending mental purgatory. If some of this sounds familiar, I took some inspiration from Bloozstella's blue diamond swap AU for this, by the way. Go check that out if you have time!

~~~~~~~~~~~

Now... Shadow Milk Cookie. The fandom's new favorite blue gremlin/pos. He's clever, charismatic, perceptive as hell, a lover of the theatre, and very cocky in his abilities. The very first time we see him, he gets to work immediately, corrupting some fairies, tormenting Pure Vanilla Cookie, and taking over the faerie kingdom, and that's just him toying around with them all. Interestingly enough, despite being the embodiment of deceit, he shares more truth than lies with the players and the hero gang, revealing Dark Enchantress' plans and telling them that all the other beasts have been awakened after his temporary defeat. His lies have been fairly obvious for the most part, which is a bit strange. I wonder if there's a reason for that...

So... Why hope? Why in the witch's oven would I make such a menace hope? Because of how he handles the truth. In canon, Pure Vanilla doesn't handle the truth too well. He'll confront it, but he has a tendency to get consumed in himself or worry about how others would take it. Shadow Milk, even before he turned to darkness, feels like he would embrace it without hesitation and keep moving like a runaway train. Pure Vanilla is reactive, Shadow Milk is proactive, and his curiosity and determination could make him overcome any obstacle. Probably why he's so dangerous, asides from the immense power he has.

You can probably guess that my head canon for him is that he was the last beast to turn evil, so naturally he's gonna be the very first cookie to get his soul jam! And he starts in the Blueberry Academy. Kind of, it's not formed yet when he begins. Our shadow menace starts out as an aspiring scholar/adventurer and thrill seeker. He's definitely a nerd, kinda like Wizard Cookie, and begins his hero's journey exploring the world. On one particular expedition, he visits the continent of Beast-Yeast, but doesn't make it that far before passing out. He wakes up in the company of fairy cookies who took pity on him, and is taken to Elder Faerie. Unsurprisingly, he tells Shadow Milk Cookie to go back to Crispia once he's recovered because this place is far too dangerous for him and he'll die. Unsurprisingly he takes this as a challenge, and during his stay he reads up on the place in the library. Far too invested to leave, he starts exploring beyond the kingdom in secret, and finds the soul jam deep within the forest.

Eventually he gets caught, and Elder Faerie wants to take the soul jam away from him, but whoops! It's already attuned to Shadow Milk and there's nothing he can do about it. Realizing there isn't much he can do, he at least offers to train him to use it properly, prompting a few training sessions before sending him off. When Shadow Milk gets back, he doesn't establish a kingdom. Instead he goes to find others like him first. For his research, of course. Eventually he ends up forming the group of the Ancients, and finally establishes his kingdom. He doesn't feel like he'd have a traditional kingdom. Rather, it would be more like the Creme Republic! It's a hub of the arts and sciences, a place where the brightest and most creative cookies can show their talents to the fullest potential. He finally founds the Blueberry Yogurt Academy in his "kingdom", and he, alongside a personal council makes the rules. In reality, the council does all the work and he acts more as a figurehead so he can focus on his own personal projects. He's definitely the most hands on with his subjects, hosting events, mingling with the commonfolk, exploring, etc. At least before the Dark Flour War... But that's a story for another time.

~~~~~

Finally... I'm DONE. No more foundation, now I can just think and edit. Mystic Flour's part is outdated with her release and now I have to rectify that in the future. I hope you all enjoyed this miniseries! I will be taking questions on both this AU and Fading Letters. I'll try to answer any questions a lot quicker this time, and hopefully the rest of this month is uneventful. Please.

This is being posted at like, 1 AM in the morning, so good night everyone! Hope you have a peaceful night!

[magpod-confessions]

For starters, I don’t like doorkeay. I just don’t care for it, but if you like it, that’s great. I understand loving a ship. I just dislike doorkeay.

But oh my god they are so horrendously mischaracterized when being shipped. And yes, the TMA fandom has a problem with woobification and mischaracterization in general, but dear fucking lord it is so bad with doorkeay.

I know you all want the distortion to be your nonbinary colorful bowling alley carpet twink who looks like a hazbin hotel character, but that’s not Michael.

I know you all want the sassy gay goth twink with mommy issues, but that’s not Gerry.

And combined, they are not like that. I don’t know how to describe what Like That means but they are not Like That. Michael is not your little cinnamon roll baby and neither is Gerry. Grown ass men/creatures of confusion and illusion.

This fandom babies its male/male adjacent characters so badly and the female characters are hung out to dry. I know the misogyny argument has been made a hundred times over, but you’d be hard-pressed to find fan media that is half as nice to the female characters as it is to the male ones.

I’m not saying you can’t enjoy out of character content. I do that too, and in a fandom like this it’s inevitable. But if it’s *this* out of character, do you even like the characters or do you like your OCs that share a name with the podcast characters?

.

[sunderwight]

I love HOTD fic concepts where Lucaerys and Arrax accidentally kill Vhagar. I want more of them so bad.

Mostly because of the black comedy potential. I could go either way for whether or not Aemond dies too, but jesus that's such a great idea. The oldest, biggest, scariest dragon on the fucking planet and somehow sopping wet twink Lucaerys Velaryon and his tweenage mount manage to take her out? One little alteration and the tone of the whole conflict shifts almost entirely.

Of course some kind of freak intervention is required for it to work, and most of that's still pretty dark. Options I like include Vhagar actually just being so old that she's nearing the end of her lifespan and so it's less that Lucaerys and Arrax successfully kill her, and more that she just happens to die at the worst possible moment for Aemond, or else something like lightning from the active storm striking some of the chains on her (prospects also not good for Aemond with that one), or Arrax gets in a single lucky shot via breathing fire right down her throat and causing a fatal blowback of the whole firebreathing system that is like a 1 in a million chance type thing.

But then what? Everyone at Storm's End saw Aemond flip his shit at Luke and go chasing after him, plus Arrax is like snack-sized compared to Vhagar, you can't even plausibly lie and claim that somehow they instigated the conflict, not even with Luke's history of successfully landing critical hits against his uncle. Not that the "we're the victims" approach would necessarily do the Greens strict favors here, since Aemond's a grown man now and his side are hinging a lot of their cause on appealing to the same brand of Westerosi toxic masculinity that views losing a fight as a sign that the gods don't like you enough.

I haven't seen it yet but I also think it would be really funny if the Greens tried to paint Lucaerys as this like, unholy terror? Like they just have to exaggerate how horrible this one teenager is in order to salvage any shred of dignity from the situation. He is death from the skies! Tried to murder his uncle in cold blood when they were but babes! Thirsted for violence and slaughter ever since! The mad dog son acts at the behest of the evil false queen who spawned him, truly he is Maegor come again! A sinister bastard! And they're talking about this Disney Channel ass kid:

We can all hear the dramatic score from the show gradually distort into circus music in the back of our minds, right?