#disposable black girlfriend

[ironyismybestfriend]

I’m gonna need anyone who isn’t a black woman/femme to not speak on discrimination that black women and femmes experience because y’all really don’t know what you’re talking about and every explanation you give is just a slap in the face. That includes tv tropes.

[cowboys-only]

Something I’ve noticed over the years is what I’m for now coining the “disposable black boyfriend” trope.

Its sister the “disposable black girlfriend” trope is a practice in film and television where a (often white) main character will date a seemingly perfect black girl who will help them grow into a better person. The black girlfriend will have nothing wrong with her in particular, but when the MC has matured to the point of being a respectable partner, she will be written off. This allows the now matured and evolved MC to end up with a white partner, despite having been in a loving and stable relationship with a seemingly perfect ( or at least inoffensive) woman of color.

- The Good Place , You, Danny Phantom, Friends, Greys Anatomy - to name a few

Now, the disposable black boyfriend holds a different place in the world of media, and so far I’ve only observed it twice.

Charles Beckendorf in PJO and Ekko in Arcane

The disposable black boyfriend is a character who is canonically in love with a white woman in their respective piece of media, and this love is reciprocated. Beckendorf and Silena were in a committed relationship up until their untimely deaths, Beckendorf even featuring as Silena’s last words as she died. Ekko and Jinx were shown to be in a relationship in an alternate universe, and despite the circumstances of life in their home dimension keeping them apart it was clear from both character interactions, writing , and literal declaration by way of the creators that their feelings were mutual.

Despite this, you’ll find that certain parts of their respective fandoms will say that the white partner in the relationship doesn’t care for their black partner at all. Despite all evidence to the contrary, they will say that the black partner was only marginally relevant to the life of their counterpart and holds no place in their heart.

This also goes in tandem with the other part of this consensus that I’ve observed. It seems to only happen when the white woman has a possibility of being with another white woman?

In the case of Charlie I’ve seen people say that Silena never cared about him, and or never wanted to date him. They’ve said that his death was a great route to Silena ending up with Clarisse La Rue. (Despite the fact that Clarisse is now black in the tv show, in the books these are 2 white women). A queer relationship between two white women is enough reason for certain fans to say that they’re happy a black boy is dead? As well as reason enough to imply that said black character is holding them back from ‘real’ happiness?

Ekko suffers much the same, with people in the Arcane fandom implying that he forces his feelings on Jinx with no reciprocation at all. Now I don’t play League of Legends, nor do I ever intend to, but fans swear up and down that a character by the name of Lux is Jinx’s one and only. I can’t speak on this, but Arcane and it source material seem to exist on separate planes (in the same way that the MCU and Marvel Comics often do). Bringing up a white woman who has never been mentioned once in the entire course of the show to disprove a canon relationship (or at least soft spot/ infatuation what have you) is equally off putting to me.

I hope this trope / general fandom attitude doesn’t continue. Twice is 2 times too many

Edit (also in the comments) : don’t take this as “omg now we can’t ship white wlw relationships, ur making it weird blah blah” . What I’m saying is that wishing death on a black character and implying that they’re pressuring/ harassing/ ruining a white character’s life is weird and gross

[sarafangirlart]

Is it a coincidence that around the time ppl started depicting Andromeda as black (or at least a WOC) they also start shipping Perseus with Medusa? (Disposable black girlfriend trope much?) Or have Perseus and Andromeda be together but in an abusive relationship? Bc it seems only the white Andromeda can have a loving husband and a happy ending.

[blackfilmmakers]

There was someone on twitter who mentioned they fear btsv writers might make margo into the 'black disposable love interest in order to uplift the white one trope' and now that's been on my mind a lot because I'm scared they'll do that to her. Seeing as the writers/directors are white men...I have no faith 😶

And I don't blame you, because I had this fear since Into the Spiderverse

The fact they didn't show any Black girl spiderpeople in the first movie already had me thinking, "they are not going to do them justice"

I adore Margo so much yall, I don't want her to be reduced to the disposable black girlfriend trope. It's sad enough this happens so much we have a term for it.

[sunsis]

you're absolutely right and thank you for saying everything that bothered me about her ending. mel fell victim to the disposable black girlfriend trope

Mel and Jayce Deserved Much Better

After experiencing horrors and walking through valleys and shadows, I truly hoped Mel would break down this season and unleash her emotions. Especially since she spent the entire season unlearning hardness with Jayce being so openly affectionate and emotional. This final act was honestly a slap in the face.

The one person she hoped would offer her that safety net to do this completely shuts her down. Mel was always cognizant of his feelings, constantly looking out for him, advising him, and teaching him. She shared with him her deepest insecurities and vulnerabilities. I can understand if Mel and Jayce are both going their separate ways because of the Noxus plot but to have him be this cold, and distant, and show a lack of understanding toward her plight is bizarre.

Mel comes back with a changed appearance and a different demeanor, and he doesn't even ask what happened. He seems to not care. Jayce isn't even giving her a chance to explain herself and just keeps coming at her and you can see the moment when Mel puts all her walls back up. Don't even get me started on the fact that he held the hammer in his hand for most of the time.

Their interactions during this act paint Jayce as one large hypocrite. He benefitted from all of Mel's teachings, from her providing comfort and affection, to her investments in Hextech. Asking her why she didn't save Viktor like she had something against him was wild.

This is the same Mel who offered comfort to Jayce when Viktor was severely injured during the explosion. The same Mel who immediately understood why Jayce left after their night together, recognized the importance of Viktor to Jayce.

If Mel could protect everybody in that room, she would. When she explains her lack of awareness of her abilities to him, he just keeps going on and on.

And the apology with the "passenger" line was just bad. It lacked a certain level of remorse that I would expect from Jayce of all people. Where is that good-hearted man who could tell when people aren't feeling their best, that person who always wanted to help people and make their lives better?

I think the Survivor Jayce is not the Jayce that Mel fell in love with, this is another man. The Jayce she fell in love with died at the bottom of that cave. The survivor Jayce is Viktor's passenger.

Jayce abandoned not just Mel but also his mother who protected him many times to be with Viktor in the afterlife?? In what universe is Jayce pulling that shit?

Now Mel's heading off to Noxus. A nation that doesn't align with her values and morals and would most likely have to harden herself to rule or have influence there. I hate it all. I hate that Black women always have to be strong. We actually had an opportunity to see a Black woman who grew up in that environment slowly shed those walls with a man who actually loved her and was openly affectionate and vulnerable. I'm so sad that it was taken from us. I'm sick and tired of the strong Black woman trope.

With how mischaracterized her motives and actions towards Jayce are, I for one cannot say that I'm excited for a spin-off series with Mel as a main character. Not with this writing team and this fandom.

To me, this show ended in season 1 with Zaun becoming independent, Jinx not firing the rocket, and Mel and Jayce growing together as individuals and as a couple.

[phillycheesesteakcore]

I am going to need a minimum of three black people (2 of which must be women) in the writers room of the next Fortiche/Riot project. ESPECIALLY if it's going to heavily feature Mel.

[cancerian-woman]

When people call out Elijah’s women of color girlfriends who were thrown away I just have to praise them because the fandom doesn’t say shit about those women. Elijah had all these women and there’s zero acknowledgement after the fact. Justice for Aya, Celeste, and Gia forever.

Many things said in this article I read today I’ve said it here before but incase anybody else wants to read. See here. Things they go over Marcel’s mistreatment, how disposal black witches are in canon etc

[sukibenders]

Something that still doesn't sit right with me while being a part of the HOTD fandom is how Laena was done so dirty, from being placed as a "second" option for Daemon and having him keep her from returning home, from having her daughters see Driftmark, from seeing her own brother and parents before she died! That added on to the fact of how Daemon just sucked at loving her the way she deserved makes my blood boil. And to make matters worse, to drive the knife further, is during her funeral (added on to him laughing during it, which wasn't appropriate at all no matter the context or what anyone says) where she and her unborn son were only just recently placed at the bottom of the sea, Daemon and Rhaenyra sleep together and then marry each other all within the span of the same episode (don't even get me started on how they went heavy into the romantics of the moment but couldn't even bother to show Daemon be affection with Laena like he was in the books I believe).

And some in the fandom reaction to all this can be such a turn off. Because you can have people, mainly black fans, rightfully call out problems with this plot change, with Rhaenyra and Daemon sleeping together only right after Laena's funeral and will be met with so many heinous responses (a lot in which tie in with centering Rhaenyra and going "oh so you hate her" type beat) and it's so frustrating. That, and how we barely see Daemon interact with his daughters, let alone be affectionate as well as protective over them---that scene where the girls are bruised from a fight and clear in distress and yet Daemon doesn't even move to check on them nor go into a rage at the fact that his daughters were harmed, let alone the fact that his now dead wife's dragon was claimed by another on the day of her funeral. None of that. But will stand protectively by Rhaenyra and her sons' side without second thought. Make it make sense.

[aishabellasbigblogofeverything]

Here’s the article.

It’s very disheartening indeed. 😢

Have you heard of the Disposable Black Girlfriend trope ? There's a Medium article about it. Its when a black girl is a love interest usually to a white character but she's not the endgame love interest & the white character ends up with another white character at the end. Its called the Disposable Black girlfriend but it does happen to black men.

Familiar with the trend, but I hadn't realized it'd been named. But that's helpful so thanks for sharing. It can definitely apply to Black and brown men too.

The thing that bugs me is that shows will cast Black or brown people (usually in guest spots) to be like "look we know that BIPOC exist, we're being inclusive," but it ends up being really problematic. I was a toddler when Friends was airing but I'm gonna guess Julie, the girlfriend Ross brought back from China in season two, was not a well-received character in 1995. When shows bring on poc to be a layover love interest they're putting the characters and the actors in a really unfair position to be hated by fans because they're interfering with desired pairings. And it reduces them to plot devices to help the end-game pairing realize their true feelings. It's fine for relationships not to work out, most people fall in love more than once but in the end the disposable Black boyfriend or girlfriend trope sends the message that Black and brown people are fine for a fling, hot enough for sex, but not worthy of real love.

With regard to Black women whether or not most writers get it for decades Black women have been stuck being portrayed as hyper-sexualized Jezebels or Mammy figures so consumed with taking care of white folks that they've forgotten what sex is. Stories where Black women are loved are huge and still rare. We're not really getting that by being just a speed-bump in someone else's love story.

Again, The Office did it, Sex and the City did it, Friends did it, You did it twice, Once Upon a Time did it twice. Zoom in on OUAT, the writers said we're gonna make Marian who is Robin Hood's cannonical true love and has been for decades a woman of color. But we will not explore who she is as a person or her feelings, she'll just be an obstacle to Regina's happy ending and her death was reduced to a joke. Classy.

Maybe there's hope because unlike other shows Simon's not a guest character. Maybe they'll go the Brooke Davis route. Brooke wasn't Lucas's true love but that didn't make her a bad character or unlovable. She wasn't Lucas's first choice, but later she'd be Julian's. Maybe Simon's Julian Baker is out there. I appreciate that they didn't demonize him in the break-up, but as it stands not a great look. The show had Max say he and Zoey’s connection was purely physical in season one and then the writers used him to have Max and Zoey get back together. Not great. 

[arsenicpanda]

Riverdale very pointedly saying Tabitha isn't dead in hopes of avoiding accusations of killing her and building everyone's happiness on top of her sacrifice all for the sake of having one (1) episode of polyamorous core four is as hilarious as it is predictable and frustrating. But like, hot take: if a character is removed from her life, won't see her family or friends again, and sacrifices the future and family she would have had with the man she loves, then she is, for all intents and purposes, dead.

[my-thoughts-and-junk]

thinkinggg about. race in adventure time

[freemaagyemans]

We got confirmation about what happened to Claire but did we ever hear anything about Carly again??

Honestly. I don’t even know. Stopped watching the series after Season 3. I have a feeling she got sent back into the void with all the others, never to be mentioned again.

[medium-bloodcrafter-scion]

This here is why I'm so picky about what I watch. It hurts committing to a show that uses the Black woman to reel in eager audiences of dedicated Black fans and then they drop us for a white love interest when they've gotten their views and ratings. Make it stop!

[mslaurynhil1]

The Summer I Turned Pretty and the Disposable Black Girlfriend

When we are first introduced to Nicole in the summer I turned pretty it’s not made completely clear what her relationship with Conrad Fisher is at all. We see them kissing at the bonfire, but then Conrad gets into a fight over belly and that’s kind of the end of it, until we see them interact some more at the pool, and Nicole continues to talk about him in a way, where it seems as though they are in some sort of relationship or entanglement. This immediately dissipates the second Belly starts to express her feelings for Conrad openly, and we are supposed to see Nicole as this kind of jealous bitter person who takes Belly's clothes at the lake because she “stole her man���( which she most definitely did) so can we blame her? But above all the point is that Conrad was never supposed to be with Nicole or stay with Nicole and we, as the audience were never supposed to view Nicole as a long-term partner, or someone that Conrad would legitimately pursue, but an obstacle in Belly’s way to her end goal. Effectively Nicole is an object.

[vicontheinternet]

I hate that we as black women get no variety of characters because everyone will them for doing what their white counterparts have been doing for decades

[etherealnoir]

Jenny Han’s obsession with white people and disdain for black people needs to be studied lol